#when is the next re re re release of black parade coming out with colored vinyl and a wristband 😍

[fob4ever]

um. LOL

[honeywithblueberries]

The Perks- With and Without You

I was not expecting to have this finished this soon. A big thank you to Cimar for proofreading. Hopefully you like it. THIS CHAPTER IS RATED E FOR EXPLICIT. THERE’S SOME SMUT.

………..

“One extra large brownie explosion ice cream bowl, extra sprinkles and whipped cream, three cherries on top!”

Nick shoved his paws in his pocket and grinned smugly at the otter clerk who was rapidly writing his order down. His green eyes pointed refused to make contact with Judy’s as she scowled at him. Dave chuckled, having given the clerk his own complex order, as Gideon stepped forward with a confused look at them.

“Uh, just a chocolate cone for me, please,” he requested politely. Dave put his arm around the other todd and grinned down.

“Gideon, my friend, live a little! Try something new! Crazy! You’re in Zootopia and here,” Dave grinned over at the females who were pulling out their money and passing it to the clerk, “anyone can do anything!”

“Including spending all of their friends' tips on ice cream,” Judy grumbled. Gideon gave her a worried look which had her rolling her eyes with a smile. “Come on, Gid. My treat! Anything you want.” She looked up at the menu and grinned. 

“They have a pecan praline,” she added in a singsong voice. Nick, Dave, and Brook laughed at the other fox’s excited expression. Judy nodded at the clerk. “One Pecan Praline Surprise please. And the Carrot Cake Sundae for me.”

The group stood off to the side to await their orders when a cheerful ringtone came from Gideon's pocket. His phone was dug out quickly, Judy smirking at him and the flush. But he still couldn’t help but smile at the name on the screen.

“It’s Sharla, gotta take this!” He dashed away to answer. Brook and Dave had paired up, leaving Nick and Judy grinning at each other for a moment before falling into a pleasant, not quite so awkward silence.

“So…” Judy began moving closer to Nick and looking up at him, grin still intact.

“Sooo.” Nick’s expression mirrored hers.

“We’re going to have to schedule a re-match on the obstacle course at Precinct One this Saturday.” Her eyes caught the otter who took their order, setting it on the pick up counter. “I think I have a shot at whooping your tail next time.”

“Oh, is that so!” Passing hers and holding onto the other two, they made their way to the table Gideon had claimed, Brook and Dave right behind them. “I don’t know, Carrots. You were pretty confident in your chances the last time. And we all remember how that went.” He smirked at her, but she simply smiled and wagged her eyebrows at him.

“Well, if you’re scared of a rematch, I understand.” His mouth dropped open but his eyes held humor. “After all…” She scooped a bite from her bowl and cheersed him with it. “I’m just a cute, little bunny.” It vanished into her mouth, a smug smile flashed at him before she turned away to take her seat.

Nick studied her for a moment. He didn’t bother to fight his smile and leaned down to her.

“You’re so on, bunny,” he whispered in her ear. Judy looked back up at him and winked. 

“Bring it fox.” Nick grinned and passed Gideon his before taking a seat next to her. 

“But you know,” she gave him a curious smile around her bite as he spoke, “it would be a shame if that’s all we did on Saturday.” He took a bite of his ice cream with a shrug. “It’s supposed to be perfect beach weather. And we really shouldn’t waste our youth being cooped up indoors.”

“The beach sounds fun!”

The bunny and fox both jumped. They had completely forgotten about their friends taking a seat with their ice cream. Brook grinned and dug in while Dave gave Nick his full attention. 

“What time were you guys thinking? Right after camp? Gideon, you in?”

Gideon gave them a thumbs up before turning the phone around to show off the pretty black ewe on the screen.

“Hi, Sharla!” Judy greeted with a wave. Her friend’s mouth moved but no sound came out.

“Sorry,” Gid began, gesturing to the ear bud in place. “She says hi and she misses you, Judy. And are you coming back for the Carrots Day Festival?”

“Oh, I forgot all about that.” She looked over at Nick who watched her with a curious expression on his face. “Maybe. I completely forgot about that.”

Gideon turned the phone back to himself and relayed the information. 

“There’s a whole festival devoted to carrots?” His voice held a lot of pent up laughter. Enough to have the doe rolling her eyes. “A whoooooolllllllleeeee festival…. Devoted to carrots……”

“Just laugh, Nick, we both know you’re going to anyway.”

“I’m not gonna laugh.” The corners of his mouth twitched and a small chuckle escaped him when she flicked a walnut piece at his nose. “What? I wasn’t! I promise.” Everyone at the table gave him a look and the red todd shrugged with a grin. “I was just surprised! I mean…” he looked at Judy again, this time failing to keep his laughter in. “It’s a whole festival devoted to carrots.” 

Judy tried to glare at him when he broke on that last word. But she too joined in after a moment.

“I know!” she laughed. “The town of Bunnyburrow devoting a whole weekend to carrots. Can we be any more of a cliche?”

Brook and Dave shook their heads with smiles before turning their conversation back to their upcoming beach trip. Gideon had since said goodbye to Sharla and was now watching with polite interest as he enjoyed his ice cream. The table fell into companionable silence as everyone enjoyed the food and pre-parade festivities.

“So, when I win our rematch,” Nick looked over at Judy as she spoke with a smug look on her face, “what do I win?”

“Well, when I win, you’re going to have to take me to this Carrots Day festival. Spare no experience.” Nick scooped up another bite and savored it, outlandishly rolling his eyes and sighing with extreme pleasure. “MMM-hum! Victory is sweet.”

Judy gave him a light punch in the arm.  “I’ll take that bet.”

Then she and Gideon exchanged looks and dissolved into laughter. Brook and Dave looked from one to the other, as did Nick who was beginning to look worried.

“What did I just agree to?” he asked them.

The other todd got his laughter under control a bit. “Oh, just a rootin’, tootin’ good time! Nothin' to worry about… much."

Nick looked at Judy, who nodded and took another bite of her ice cream. “And if I win, we still go to the Carrots Day festival. So there's no backing out. She stuck her paw out and he reluctantly shook it. “I promise it’ll be fun!”

Brook suddenly checked her watch and jumped up suddenly. “It’s about to start!” 

Dave followed her, Gideon right behind him. Nick and Judy lingered a moment, smiling shyly at each other as they got up to join their friends. 

“Soooo….” He took a bite and lightly brushed up against her. “What does go on at the festival?”

Their group cut through the thickening crowd for spots, the red todd staying close to the doe. The paws not holding their ice cream dropped to their sides and brushed against one another, before clasping together.  With it, shy glances were exchanged, smiles softer for each other and equally excited. Nick’s tail slightly shielded Judy from the crowd they were pushing through, both keeping their eye on Brook, whose height made a perfect guide towards the edge of the canals. 

“Nothing as crazy as you’re imagining,” she assured with a smile up at him. “We just have some traditions newcomers might find… colorful.”

“Oh when you put it like that, it's farrrrr less daunting.�� 

That earned him a wide grin from her, but a response was cut off by a sudden shift in the crowd. Nick was barely able to steady himself. Judy, however, was ripped from his paw after stumbling over someone’s tail. They lost sight of each other when the crowd shifted again.

“Carrots!” “Nick!”

She stumbled again, but was caught by two familiar paws. 

“Careful, there, Hopps!” Judy looked up into the familiar eyes of Kody. He grinned at her while she straightened up. “Wouldn’t want to get crushed, now, would we.”

He was given a polite smile that turned wistful when she noticed her ice cream on the ground.

“Thanks, Kody.” The paper bowl was picked up and tossed in the trash before she turned to leave with a wave. “I guess I better go find Nick and the others.”

“Unless you wanna stick with me?” Kody took her paw before she could bring it down and gave her a charming smile while stepping closer. “I have a great spot and it’s right next to the bathroom.”

Judy ducked her head bashfully.

“Kody,” she sighed and looked at him with a patient smile. He returned it sadly while releasing her paw. “I think you’re great and everything, but I’m just not interested. I actually think I’m being pretty obvious about how much I like Nick.”

The todd blinked before laughing in a defeated manner. 

“Yeah,” he agreed, “you’re being clear about that. I’m not sure why, but if he’s who you want…” He shrugged. “I can accept defeat. Nick’s a lucky guy.”

Judy smiled brightly. “I think I lucked out a bit, too. Well, I gotta go find Nick and our friends. Thanks for catching me, Kody.” 

She bounced away with a final smile. Kody waved back before sighing wistfully and turning away. Natasha rushed towards him looking annoyed. 

"Kody!" He was given a punch on the shoulder. "You were supposed to kiss her-"

"Oh, give it a rest, you psycho stalker!" Kody rolled his eyes. "They're freaking taken with each other."

The vixen looked at him in shock before looking back towards the bunny being greeted by Nick. He scooped her up in his arms and twirled her around, laughing with glee as he did. The bunny joined in before she was set back down. Exchanging fond looks, they turned towards the canals, paw in paw. 

Natasha gave an annoyed roll of her eyes before stomping off after her cousin. 

Hours later, the kits found themselves in Dave's living room, going over the parade and the pictures taken. Judy lay draped over Brook's shoulders, pointing out her favorites while the guys played video games. Once Dave’s mother let Brook know her mom was outside, the females gave the males hugs before leaving. Judy wrapped her arms around Nick’s neck, feeling the slight rumble of his satisfied purr before she pulled away.

“You better bring your A game tomorrow, Carrots. I’m going another round on your obstacle course before we hit the ZPD one.”

She smiled and surprised him by pressing a kiss to his cheek. Her lips lingered a moment, just long enough for him to inhale her scent as he had done at the party. It was still everything he had wanted it to be. Moving away from him, he was given one final smile before she turned on her heel to follow the tigress out of the door.

“I’m not that worried.” The words were said over her shoulder, knowing full well she had his attention, all the way until the front door closed. 

The sound of Gideon making a whipping noise broke Nick from his stupor. He glared at him while Dave snorted with laughter.

“Like that ewe doesn’t have you wrapped around her hoof,” he muttered as he settled back down. “And like you don’t follow Brook around like a duckling.”

“She sets my heart on fire,” Gideon sighed.

“Brook smells like a flower patch,” Dave added wistfully.

Nick gave a small roll of his eyes but still kept his smile. “Judy….” The other two males looked over at him while their video game reset. “She’s better than I ever thought she could be.”

Dave leaned into Gideon. “He’s been obsessed with her for, like, six months. This has been a dream come true for him.”

Gideon released a guffaw and focused back on the game. Nick’s brain was still paused on Judy and the kiss she had given him.

She likes me, he thought to himself with a slow grin. She walked away from that stupid Kody, right to you, held your paw, and kissed you.

You’re the luckiest todd in the world!

…………………..

It was the second morning that Jack woke up to the slide of a leg across his hip. Only this time, the sun just barely peeked over the horizon and he wasn’t wearing pants; the sensation of fur on fur was waking up every part of his body. He smiled when he felt lips and gentle, yet sharp, teeth nibbling his ear. Her scent surrounded him, the delicious smell of arousal mingling with his own. 

I could get used to this, he thought, his eyes opening just in time for his vision to blur as she pressed against him. 

Skye moved to straddle his hips again. Her movements shifted the sheets cocooned around them, their activities the night before having knocked them onto the floor of his bedroom. Blue eyes met blue eyes just as her hips shifted to take him once more. Jack’s paws went to her hips and his teeth ground together, his climax embarrassingly close. But Skye, noticing his struggle, only smirked and rocked her hips again.

A breathless laugh escaped her when he fell back against the floor and tried to last.

“Skye,” he gasped, gripping her thighs as she kept up her pace. “I- I can’t-”

“Don’t hold back, Jack,” she breathed, moving faster. She bit her lip as pleasure hit her like a bolt of lightning. “I want this.” His eyes closed and jaw fell slack, submitting to her. “I want you. Gods... I want you….” Everything went white as she lost herself in their lovemaking. Jack came with a strangled gasp, pulling her onto him as deep as he could go and grinding his hips upwards, toes curled against the floor. One of her paws gripped the fur of his belly, while the other massaged the sensitive nub between her thighs. “Gods,” she murmured again, slumping over his body once her climax burned out.

They panted together, aftershocks of pleasure leaving them sated and feeling alive. Jack was still smiling when he opened his eyes, his vision obscured by white fur. 

“That was one hell of a wake up,” he chuckled, wrapping his arms around her. She pushed her head up and grinned down at him. “And I thought the other morning set the bar high.”

She laughed and rocked her hips one final time. “Think you can handle it, Agent Savage?”

That had him sitting up and crushing his lips to hers, taking control of their position and rolling them till he was on top. He pulled back while his paw traveled down one of her long legs, hooking his elbow under her knee and thrusting hard. Skye gasped as he thrusted again.

“You bet your ass I can,” he growled.

An hour later, they had migrated back onto his bed. Early morning light filtered into the room and warmed the couple whispering and giggling together. Nuzzling under his chin, Skye breathed in his scent before pushing herself up to look at the time. Seven am. Flopping back down, she sighed and snuggled closer .

“I need to get up and get Nick in a bit.” Her voice was muffled against Jack’s fur, but he still caught every word. 

“Noooooooo,” he protested, tightening his arms and moving his paws to convince her to stay longer. “Stay here, with me. I’ll make it worth your while.”

“Jack,” she protested weakly, “I can’t.” His lips and teeth found her sweet spot on her collarbone and she became jelly. “I have to go.” She shuddered with desire but stamped it down, refusing to get sucked into another round with him. No matter how tempting it was. “I have my little brother I need to look after.” Her paws went to his face, his lust filled eyes meeting her own but still giving her his full attention. “And you have a little sister you need to think of.” A kiss was pressed to his lips before leaving his bed with great effort.

He groaned with displeasure but watched with interest as her nude form moved around the room in search of her clothing.

“You’re teasing me right now,” came his dry comment. 

Skye looked over to the bed where he sat, naked still, looking mouthwateringly sexy with his fur tossled and eyes half lidded when they met hers. His eyebrows lifted at her suggestively, his arms resting in his knees, trying to entice her clothes off and back into his bed. Skye's jeans were pulled on but left undone, fastening and adjusting her bra. Moving back onto the bed, she walked on her knees towards him. There was no way any sane mammal would let him get away with not being kissed senseless. Looking the way he did in that moment, she really wanted to make him moan like he did last night. But duty called. And Nick would be waiting for her.

“Don’t act like you’re not enjoying it, Agent Savage.” He whimpered as she moved away from him. Fixing her pants, she turned to face him again before she strode over to his closet. Jack’s ears and head cocked in curiosity when the doors were pulled open and a shirt of his removed. His ears went ram rod straight when it was slipped over her head onto her body. With a smug look in her eyes at his reaction, she snuggled into it and inhaled deeply. “I want your scent on me all day long.”

Jack’s arousal reared its head. It took everything he had to not tackle and drag her back into bed. But she was right. The blankets were flipped back and he dragged himself out. He was keenly aware of her intrusive gaze on his own naked form and VERY aware of the sweet scent of her desire. 

“Careful, Agent Skye,” he began with a smirk of his own, pulling on a pair of pajama bottoms, “a bunny could get ideas with a reaction like yours.”

They shared a laugh, Jack reluctantly following her to the front door, paws on her hips the entire time. But it was quickly shut when the sounds of the morning rush from downstairs hit their ears. Both exchanged nervous looks.

“Ready for all the looks and taunts?” he asked her. Skye looked towards the door then back to him. She shook her head earnestly. “Fire escape.”

“Good idea.”

Together they went to one of the living room windows that faced the alley. It was slid open and Skye carefully crawled out with Jack right behind her. Jack breathed a sigh of relief when the metal ladder was lowered to the ground without a sound. Once fully extended, she smiled at him, meeting him halfway for a kiss.

“I’ll see you in a few hours?” he asked when they separated, his paws framing her face. His thumb brushed over her bottom lip, the vixen nuzzling into his paw when he did.

“See you in a few hours,” she confirmed. He was given another quick kiss before she hurried down the ladder. With a final wave, she was gone, leaving the buck with a sense of loss in her absence. 

After a moment, he crawled back through the window and set about straightening up his home. Picking up his pants from the day before, laying next to the door of his bedroom, his cell phone fell to the ground with a clack. He scooped it up and pressed the unlock button. A sigh was repressed when it didn’t light up.

“Damn…” It was plugged in and turned on, almost immediately lighting up with notifications. His brows furrowed in confusion. “What the hell? Eighteen missed calls and…” he clicked on his text messages. “Three hundred texts!”

His thumb scrolled through all of his messages.

Jason: Is it true?!!?!?!?!?!?

Kelly: OMG I CANT BELIEVE YOU RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Frances: you freaking badass! I’ve been chasing one for years and you ACTUALLY scored with one! You my hero, bro! how was it? was it amazing? was she freaky? DID SHE BITE? please say yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Natalie Carrets: I can’t believe I ever had a crush on you! So gross!!

Jack kept reading, dread and confusion filling him, only to be interrupted by a video chat request. Part of him wanted to screen the call. But he knew how relentless Bonnie Hopps could be. His stomach dropped and nerves went haywire when he answered. 

"Hey, Mom!" He greeted with a bright smile, trying not to let her cold glare throw him. "What's up? What are you and dad up to-"

"I'm only going to ask this once," she began. The normal twinkle of love in her purple eyes was missing, replaced with a cold glint of fury. Her normally chipper tone was hard and sent cold chills down her son's spine. 

Jack's ears fell. His heart pounded in his chest and his eyes watered, knowing all too well what was about to happen. 

"Are you -or are you not- SCREWING a fox that you just hired and bringing her around your sister?"

"M-m-mom," he stuttered, trying to keep his smile intact while a tear slipped out and down his cheek,, "it's… it's so much more than that. It's-" 

"Answer the question, Jack Edmund Hopps."

The buck's slightly desperate smile fell. Maintaining eye contact for a brief moment before his gaze fell to his lap, he gave a sharp nod and looked back up. 

"Yeah," he confirmed, nodding again. He cleared his throat of emotion and took a deep breath. Jack straightened his back and looked his mother in the eye. "It's true."

If possible, the thin line of her mouth became thinner. 

"And I thought I raised my children better than that." The statement sparked annoyance in Jack. 

"Better than being able to see a wonderful mammal who makes me happy and treats my family well regardless of species?" Jack scoffed at his mother's shocked expression. "Yeah, now I'm starting to question where I got it from."

She considered him with a look of patient anger before she matched her son’s pose.

"You're breaking up with her. Before or after firing her. I don't have a preference. Just get her out of your life and do it TODAY!"

"You have ZERO right to ask me to do that," came his indignant response. "I get she's not who you pictured me with, but she's perfect. And you're out of your godsdamn mind if you think you're going to intimidate me into leaving her-"

"Honey, I'm going to make this very simple. You're going to get this vixen out of your life. Today. If not, I will drive up there myself and take my daughter home." Jack's jaw dropped but Bonnie wasn't finished. "And going forward, you will not be welcomed in Bunnyburrow. EVER."

"You-" he felt his brain crash. "You can't do that. You can't just banish me from town. You can't keep Judy from me. Bunnyburrow is my home and we're family. I have the right to visit whenever I want and Judy is old enough to decide if she wants to see me."

"Try me." Her icy gaze bore into him. "You know how big our family is and your Uncle Terry was just re-elected mayor. Our burrow is the biggest and most widespread and, what’s more, Judy is a minor. Her father and I will decide who can be around her and who can't. So far, her brother who jumps into bed with random predator whores and parades his conquests around her is not making the list." Her expression suddenly softened, but Jack was feeling far too shaken to respond or notice. "And it would break my heart to never see you again.” She sighed and made her face stern again. “You have until closing time tonight and I have ways of knowing if you didn't or if you try to lie about it."

Jack was silent for a moment.

"Mom," he began with a slight choke in his voice, "I love her."

"Sweetheart, you have no idea what love is." Bonnie didn't wait for a response before she hung up. 

For a moment, Jack sat in silence, staring at the now dark screen of his phone. A picture of him and Judy displayed on the entertainment center caught his eye. Judy's thirteenth birthday. Hanging off her brother's back, pausing midway through their outing to snap a photo in front of the turtle tank at the aquarium. She would forgive him, wouldn't she? Skye's scent was still soaked into the apartment, making it difficult to argue against the decision. 

Unlocking his phone again, he called Jon and lifted the phone to his ear as he answered. 

"Hidy-ho, boss! What can I do you for?"

"You haven’t seen Judy yet, have you?”

“No, not yet. Why? What’s going on?”

Jack’s eyes found the picture again as he thought of a response. “Just curious. If you see her before I do, send her to me, Okay? I’m going to be doing some work up here for a bit but call me if you need anything.”

“Sure thing, boss! Just don’t wear our GM out too badly! We’re going to need her.” Jack forced a laugh before the pair disconnected and he flopped back onto the couch. All he felt was misery, something he hadn’t imagined just twenty minutes ago. It felt like everything was starting to fall into place... and now… 

With a sigh, he pulled himself up to get ready for the day. Fetching his clothing from his room, he paused to breathe in the lingering scent of Skye. It filled him, calmed his anxiety, and lifted him high. It was just as well.

No matter how he chose, he was going to crash before the day was over.

…………

Judy came into the cafe with a grin. It had been a great night and a great morning and it was going to be a great day. Bouncing through the front door of the cafe, she called out a greeting to everyone before carrying on to the stairs to drop off her overnight bag. A hello died on her lips when she found the apartment empty. Judy called out for Jack, having not seen or heard him downstairs, and realized that he was completely out of the building.

The stairs were taken two at a time before continuing to the kitchen. Once again, she paused, blinking in confusion. Never in all her visits had Jack been completely absent. His presence in the cafe was a constant and now the place seemed barren without him. Jon’s voice cut through her reverie.

“He wandered out of the building about two hours ago,” he explained, passing a bus bucket to her along with an apron. “Said he wasn’t going far. But no sign of Skye.”

Her purple eyes narrowed in confusion, accepting both. “Huh.” She shrugged and turned to work just as Jon turned back to his bake list. “I hope he’s okay. That’s not like him.”

Bobby gave her a look of agreement before clearing his throat as Jack appeared in the door’s window. The buck paused with his paw over the handle, hesitating before pushing it open. In the brief moment it took for him to enter, his blue eyes zeroed in on her and filled with something she couldn’t place. He gave her a strained smile.

“Hey, Jude.” 

“Hey, Jack,” her brows furrowed in concern and she dropped the bus bucket to go to him. “Are you okay?”

He gave her a smile and nod, though neither seemed very reassuring. “Yeah. I was just wondering if we could talk really quick.” He stepped forward and gestured towards the stairs.

“Umm, sure.”Stomach dropping, Judy gave him a look as she stepped past the bar and towards the apartment. His footsteps were light as they followed her, but she couldn’t help but notice the weight behind each one. “This is beginning to feel like the time Mom explained what goldfish heaven was when I was six.”

A strained laugh had her ears falling as they entered. While Judy moved further into the room, he closed the door. Turning to face her, he leaned against it and took a deep breath. 

His mouth opened….

12 YEARS AGO

“Come one! Come on!”

“Come to me, Quintin! Come to your big brother, Charlie!”

“Let’s go, Brook, sweetheart! Do it for your uncle Barry!”

“Nope, Silene has everyone beat!”

“Come on, Judy! Stop playing with the police car and at least try to walk!” The fifteen year old silver bunny doe sighed and looked over at her thirteen year old brother reading on the couch not far away. “I blame you, Jack. You just had to get her that stupid police car toy!”

Jack rolled his eyes and kept them on his book. “Technically, I bought that for Tom’s pet bird. He forgot it in the living room and she’s been playing with it ever since. So if you wanna blame someone, blame him.”

She narrowed her eyes and looked back at her baby sister. The tiny bunny was alternating her attentions by gazing around her cheering family, looking at her littermates steel themselves for their first steps, and rolling the police car around. To her big sister’s utter disappointment, Judy showed no interest in the competition. 

“Still,” the sullen doe muttered, sitting back and giving up. She crossed her arms and glared at the others as she practically heard herself losing twenty bucks on this event. Letting out a frustrated sigh, she turned back to Jack. “Will you at least take it while I distract her, please.”

“Five bucks,” came his clipped response. His sister rolled her eyes again.

“Fine!” 

Jack snickered at his victory and set the book aside. 

“Judy, sweetie!” Their sister called. “Look at me! Hi, sweetie!”

Judy turned to her for only a moment before they went back to the car in her paws. A few whacks on the floor with it with some baby babble to voice her approval and it was a day well spent in her mind. Light footsteps caught her attention. She paused her game to look up at her big brother creeping across the carpet. Her big purple eyes met Jack’s and her face split into a grin.

“Dak!” she shrieked. He stumbled to a halt, his eyes going wide at that. “Dak!”

Nearly everyone in the room paused to look at her, then Jack, who was staring at his baby sister with absolute shock. Judy flopped over to her front and pushed herself up into a crawl before standing on two very unstable legs. 

“Dak!” With a final shriek of his name, she barreled towards him as fast as she could go. 

On instinct, he opened his arms and caught her, falling on his bottom as he did. She laughed with happiness only a baby like her could have. Jack sat up with his sister in his arms and smiled down at her.

“She said my name! Mom! Dad! Judy’s first word was my name!” Jack stood up with her balanced in his arms, grinning and bouncing her, giving her head the occasional kiss as he did. 

Everyone else had gotten over her first word (something many of them- him included- had experienced several times already) and now were grumbling over the results. His older sister was singing their praises as she collected her winnings. 

Jack, however, smiled at his little sister, finally setting her down and accepting the police car she offered him. Judy clutched his leg, looking up at her big brother with adoring eyes.

“Dak!”

PRESENT DAY

“Jack?”

He shook his head and focused on his baby sister.

“Jack?” She took a step towards him. “Is everything okay?”

He took a breath…

“I was just wondering….” 

Judy’s eyebrows rose expectantly. 

“What do you say about doing a ski trip before school starts back up?”

Confused, Judy looked at him with incredulity.

“Uh, sure,” she agreed with a nod, a smile forming on her muzzle. “Yeah, that would be cool.” She giggled a bit. “No pun intended.”

Jack smiled again, this time less strained, but still tense. “Okay, great! I’ll do some research and we’ll set a date.” Still facing her he turned the knob and opened the door again. “Now get back to work. I need to find something up here, so I’ll be down in a moment.”

“Okay, weirdo! I can’t believe you were so stressed over that!”

He laughed. “I just know how you’re not fond of Tundratown.”

With one last grin, she was out the door and down the stairs. He waited for her footsteps to fade before closing the door and leaning against it. Against his will, realizing what he had just done, he began to cry.

…………

Water poured over Skye’s body, her paws and claws moving through her fur, working the shampoo into a lather and rinsing thoroughly. Her thoughts lingered on Jack. Considering how tender she was between her legs and how sore she felt from last night, she was amazed she was even able to function. Jack had felt better than she had expected and it was a pleasant surprise finding out rabbit bucks could go multiple rounds without going soft. Had she known that, she would have skipped out on the two todds she dated and hunted him down when she first turned eighteen.

“Skye! We’re going to be late.”

Nick banging on her bathroom door had her jumping. She had completely forgotten he was here. Easy to do when he had spent their walk from David’s home in thoughtful, comfortable silence followed by a quick race through her apartment to get ready. Other than a cheerful hello and happy smile, neither had a lot to say.

“Be right out!” The water was shut off and her fur hastily toweled off. She was still damp when she slipped on fresh underwear and grabbed the jeans she was wearing. Jack’s shirt fell from where it had been resting on top of them. Skye smiled and scooped it up, bringing it to her nose and inhaling deeply. It still smelled like him. Fresh and soothing. Holding it close, it soaked into her. Satisfied and eager to see him again, she tossed it onto her bed and grabbed her black button down.

The walk back to the Perk was almost completely silent. Brother and sister chatted about their afternoon and evening from the previous day and speculated on what their mother could be doing that moment. Skye edited her version of things for Nick's sake, but the younger fox was regretfully able to figure out what she and Jack were up to all night. But he was thankfully spared when the Perk came into view. Her paw pushed the door open and they were greeted by an enthusiastic Judy. 

"Ready to get your tail kicked, Slick?"

"I'm ready to see you try, Carrots."

The vixen laughed and glanced around. "Play nice, kits."

Skye grinned as soon as she saw the striped buck. Giving Nick a hug before he went to Judy, she strolled over to Jack sitting at the table with his head in his paws. He jumped slightly before relaxing when her paws landed on his shoulders. Her thumbs found a sore spot where they pressed causing him to tense his in discomfort before sighing in pleasure. But she was only there for a moment before he reached up to stop her ministrations. 

"Skye," he began in a quiet voice, " we need to talk." 

Her eyes grew concerned as she walked around to look at him. He kept his eyes on a spot in the corner of the window and her paw trapped in his.

“Are you okay?” A paw went to his face to bring his gaze up to hers, only to be stopped by his other paw. “Jack? What’s wron-”

“You’re fired, Skye.”

His words were cold and his expression completely blank. Nick and Judy, who had begun to joke and banter with each other, paused, both moving their stricken gaze towards the buck, and their jaws dropped. Jack’s eyes found Judy’s and watched as they filled with confusion and hurt. He stayed on her even as her own moved back to Skye.

The vixen felt a chill set in.

“Wh-what?” Her question, small and weakly asked as it was, did not pull his gaze from his younger sister. She tugged her paws from his grip and backed away. “Ar… are you serious?”

She looked over at Judy who looked back, horrified, before turning her tear filled, purple stare to her brother. Skye looked at him again, watched as he took a deep breath and stood, facing her, with eyes she couldn’t quite read. 

“It’s over,” he said in a voice just barely over a whisper.

“Jack?” Judy’s voice cut through the myriad of emotions Skye was feeling. “What the hell are you doing?”

His mouth opened but words didn’t come out.

“He’s breaking up with me.” Skye met his gaze head on, her eyes filling with tears and refusing to spill them. “I get it.” She backed away slowly, trying to keep her emotions in check. “Bunny does are easy lays. He was hoping I would be more of a challenge.” The cafe staff had paused their work to look at the scene in the lobby. Nick’s face held no expression as he looked at his sister, ears and tail on alert. Skye stood straighter and nodded at the rabbit buck in front of her. “So sorry to disappoint.”

Without another word, she turned and left, her tears spilling over once her back was turned. All eyes turned from the fleeing vixen to the striped buck who watched her leave. His own eyes seemed unfocused and his expression detached. Judy let out a huff of disbelief before turning to Nick and grabbing his paw.

“Come on, Nick, we gotta-”

Nick ripped his paw from hers and growled; her ears dropped in surprise.

“What sort of sick game are you trying to pull here?”

“Nick, I- I didn’t know-”

“This had nothing to do with her, Nick. I promise-”

“Oh, excuse me if don’t exactly trust you and your stupid, fucking promise.” He glared at him before turning his anger towards her. Judy moved towards him and he suddenly turned away and stormed for the door. “Fuck both of you!”

“Nick, please, I’m nothing like him! I swear!”

“Yeah, sure you're not! I'm just supposed to trust you won't want to be just like your hero. Go find Kody, if you're so eager to experiment. I'm sure he was next on your list of foxes to try!”

Nick shot her a final glare over his shoulder before leaving. He was deaf to her when she called out again and already down the street when her feet remembered how to work and she dashed after him. Jack remained where he stood, staring blankly at where his sister had vanished. Only to refocus once Judy returned looking defeated and sobbing. He moved towards her, the action drawing an expression he had never seen before. Or at least he had never seen directed at him.

“I hate you,” she stated, simply. Vhemonately. 

“Judy, I-” He took a step, only for her to step back.

“I don’t want to even look at you,” she spat, backing away from him towards the stairs. He looked from her to Sandra, Jon, and Bobby watching them with slack jaws. Tears stained his cheeks when he looked back towards his baby sister. “I wanna go home. I’m not going to spend another second with you. You’re exactly like them! You horrible, disgusting jerk!” Jack started towards her, the explanation on his lips when she turned away from him and ran upstairs. 

“Judy, wait!” But she didn’t.

The walls of the cafe seemed to vibrate when she slammed the apartment door. Jack could only stand in his spot and take several deep breaths to keep his thoughts in order. He just needed to explain. To tell her so she would know what had really happened today. Just as he started to move towards the staircase and everyone awkwardly began to restart their work, the door opened again. He looked up as her footsteps hit his ears. She stormed down, her backpack on and small suitcase in paw.

“Wait, Judy!" He dashed after her as she reached the front of the cafe and stormed out, past Gideon and Daisy who were just about to enter. “You can’t just leave! Please, let me-” His paw had reached for her arm only for it to whip out of his grasp and her other paw slapped him across the face, suitcase clattering to the ground. He staggered back and blinked down at her. She fought her tears and backed away from him.

 “That’s for ruining everything.”

A paw stayed pressed to his cheek even as the sting faded away. He watched his little sister vanish around the corner, choking back tears before he pulled himself together long enough to dig his cell free from his pocket. Vaguely he heard Daisy say she’ll go with her with Gideon agreeing while the pair rushed away. Watching them vanish, he sent a quick text to Bogo, asking to keep an eye out for Judy at the train station. Another was sent to Bonnie, letting her know her daughter was on her way home, but didn’t elaborate any further. 

For a long moment, he stared in the direction everyone had left in before heading back inside. The buck kept his head ducked as he reentered, but raised it up once he realized all eyes were on him. A hush fell over the cafe as he gathered as much of his dignity as he could to walk towards the kitchen. His head was held high, but not his eyes, which struggled to stay off the floor. Several times his ears and chin threatened to fall, the urge fought off as he passed through the coffee bar into the kitchen.

Almost robotically, he put on an apron, took up the next order, and paused to focus on it. Materials were taken up and put to use as he set about his work. Tension was thick as nearly every pair of eyes were on him. But still, he paid them no mind, tuning them out, and focusing on his task.

Jon, for the first time in his job at the Perk, was completely speechless. He opened his mouth and took a step towards his boss. But a paw on his arm had him pausing. His eyes met Sandra’s and he understood her silent order to leave the kitchen. Jack kept his back to everyone and piped the decorations for the order in front of him. She approached him cautiously and opened her mouth to speak.

“Say anything and you’re fired.” Her mouth closed briefly before opening again. “And if you think I’m kidding, today’s not the day to test me.”

Sandra’s eyes watered a bit but she nodded and backed away. Returning to her position at the counter, she picked up where she left off, the others following her lead. And so the day passed in tense silence, Jack too far removed from everything to notice anything happening around him.

And out of respect, no one mentioned the tears running down his cheeks.

………………………. 

Skye didn’t even realize Nick was next to her until she stopped at a crosswalk. He came to a stop beside her, paw going to her elbow. She instinctively jerked away before seeing who it was. As soon as she met her brother’s eyes, she broke. He dove into her arms and held tight as she sobbed into his shoulder and hugged him back.

“Let’s go home, Skye,” he mumbled after a moment. 

His paw firmly guided her past her apartment, towards their mother’s. Vivian Wilde may have been out of Savanna Central, but there was a comfort in going back to her childhood home.

Nick navigated her there, thankful they had not stopped rushing away from the Perk until they were closer to the Wilde residence than Skye’s. Through the building lobby, up the stairs, to the front door, and greeted by Greg lounging on the couch in his usual position. His legs thrown over the back of the couch, with the rest of him upside down, he tapped away at his phone and grinned at the sound of the door opening.

“Welcome home, kits!” he called out with a happy grin. “Our camping trip got rained out, so I’m home early. SURPRISE! How was your da-....” His eyes finally looked towards his brother and sister and he fell silent at their expressions. “Day?” Legs were swung down and he maneuvered himself into an upright position before standing.

“What happened?”

Nick looked up at his brother then back at his sister, before casting his gaze to the ground with an angry shake of his head. Greg took her in his arms and walked her towards the couch, waiting for Nick as he made for the kitchen. Skye’s sobs had tapered off, leaving her in a shocked silence. Her breath came in pants and eyes stared blankly at the floor.

Returning with a mug in his paws, Nick came to sit next on her opposite side, passing the mug to her. It was accepted quietly and sipped from, but she still didn’t speak.

“I’m guessing,” her eyes moved to Greg as he spoke, “Jack?”

Of course.

Skye still reeked of him. Her nose had gone blind to it; Nick, too, apparently. But it was very prominent to any other mammal.

“Let’s draw you a bath,” Greg suddenly announced. That seemed to pull her out of whatever daze she had fallen into.

“What?” she asked, positive she heard incorrectly.

Nick grinned and jumped up. “Great idea, Greg! I’ll get started on it.”

“Mom has that Musk Mask Bubble Bath. I think it’s under the sink and it’s a eucalyptus… something. Add some of it, will you?” His little brother left for the bathroom, leaving just the two of them. Skye looked at her little brother and gave him a watery smile.

“Thank you,” she murmured, hugging him. He hugged her back tightly.

“Anything for you, sis.” 

Hours later, after the sun had set, wearing pajamas stolen from her mother, she sat on the couch and thought.... 

Nothing.

Looking at her, one would assume she was a flurry of emotions, rabid thoughts, and feelings. Even she was surprised. Skye had assumed she would still be in intense pain. But she felt nothing. It took convincing to get her brothers to believe she was fine on her own, but when they finally did it was a great relief. 

Now….

Now she could reset. Her eyes looked down at her phone. Seven missed calls. Seven voicemails. More texts than she had ever seen. All from Jack, all ignored and deleted. He had flooded her inbox, too. All emails from him were now auto sent to a separate folder. She looked at the screen and pressed confirm.

‘Your Number Has Been Changed.’

With a sigh and fresh wave of tears, Skye turned her gaze out the living room window and waited for morning.

………………..

In his room, Nick lay on his bed with tears streaming down his cheeks. 

Dave, Finnick, and Brooklynn had been messaging him non stop asking about what happened. Brook had gone to get a drink and muffin from the cafe and visit with her friends only to find no Judy, Nick, or Skye, Jack deaf to everyone and thing, and a very dismal staff. So of course, she called Judy to find out what happened. No doubt she was calling Nick to get his side of the story. Or yell at him. Either way, he wasn’t ready to face them just yet. He picked up his phone and unlocked it. Pressing a thumb to his call log, he selected his voicemail and listened to the message again.

“Hey, Nick,” Judy’s voice greeted in a small tone. It made him close his eyes and breathe deep. “I just wanted to say I’m so sorry. Again. Please, believe me, I had no idea he was going to do that, I swear. If you could, you know, just call me back. So we can talk and maybe… I don’t know. What do you do in a situation like this? I still owe you ice cream! Remember? Maybe we can get ice cream?” She gave a sad chuckle. “Anyway…. Call me.”

Nick was tempted. Very tempted. He already regretted what he told her and he knew that family wasn’t always just carbon copies of the same mammal. But every time his thumb hovered over her number, Jack’s face popped up. That tone, that expression…

How heartbroken Skye was….

If that’s what love was, Nick was better off without it. He exited out of the call screen and moved to set his phone aside. If his eyes stayed open any longer, they would go cross. As he did, a message from an unknown number popped up.

Unknown: Hey, it’s me Natasha. Finnick gave me your number. I just heard what happened! I’m so sorry, Nick. Bunnies are just so awful! It's better you found out sooner rather than later. I hope you’re doing okay…

Annoyance filled him knowing his ‘friend’ was giving his number out to vixens who couldn’t take a hint. Nick was ready with a response as indignation filled him. 

How dare she talk about Judy like that!

But the message was never typed. 

Was she wrong?

Wasn’t this why the term crush was coined?

If loving someone could end with this much pain, what was the point?

Nick sat up and opened his gallery. His green eyes stared down at the picture of him and Judy at the party. The way her nose was adorably scrunched as she glared at him. It was exactly what he was hoping for when he said she looked cute. With a quick swipe, the picture changed. This time it was one he snuck of her in the Museum. The lights were dim and the stars faintly reflected onto the ceiling. And onto Judy. Her eyes were wide in that picture. Full of wonder and amazement, with a hint of excitement. His favorite part was remembering two seconds after he took it, she turned that gaze to him. Nick was only thirteen years old but he knew that was the moment he fell in love with her.

Nick exited his gallery and reopened his messages.

Thanks, Natasha. That means a lot.

……………………….

Judy was tucked into a compartment, her legs folded under her, staring down at her phone. She had tried every way she could to get ahold of Nick, to explain that she had no idea Jack would do what he did. But he had yet to respond. Her messages were on read and occasionally a thought bubble would pop up. It only lasted a few moments before it vanished.

Now it was just silence.

Silence suddenly broken by Brook calling her. Judy jumped in surprise before she slid her thumb over the answer button. 

“Judy, what happened?” she demanded before the doe could speak. “I just stopped by to visit you and Nick and you’re not here! Sandra said there was a big falling out and you left for Bunnyburrow. What happened? Are you okay? Did something happen to Nick? What’s going on with Jack? Aren’t we supposed to go to the beach this weekend?”

When Brook was finally questioned out, Judy took a shaky breath and opened her mouth to explain, only to burst into tears. Brook listened in stunned silence as she sobbed out the story. It really was a testament to their friendship that she even understood what was being said to her. Brook listened without interrupting until Judy fell into hiccupping silence broken by the occasional sniffle. 

“Judy, Nick’s a jerk.”

The statement shocked her for a moment. “What? What do you mean?”

“He just took all of his anger out on you!” The tigress declared. “I totally get being pissed at your brother. What he did was terrible! But you had nothing to do with it! It was in no way your fault! And he needs to stop being a dick and grow the fuck up!”

“Brook, you don’t understand. Jack-”

“Fucked up. Yes. I know. I get it, Hopps. But the simple fact of the matter is, Nick had no right to blame you for Jack’s actions. That dumb fox should consider himself lucky a female like you was willing to even look at him, let alone be willing to date him! You deserve to be treated better and if you can’t see that then you really are just a dumb bunny!”

And with that, she hung up. Judy kept the phone to her ear for a moment longer before it fell to her lap. At a loss for words and with much to think about, she turned her gaze to the window and watched the platform for Bunnyburrow station come into view. 

“Now arriving at Bunnyburrow station. Please exit to the right and mind the gap.”

She stood and took her bag and backpack before heading towards the exit. And there waiting for her was her mother and father, beaming happily as she drew closer. Bonnie rushed forward and scooped her up in a hug.

“Oh!” she squealed. “I’m so happy you’re back, baby! And I’m so sorry about Jack and your summer. I know how much you were looking forward to it.”

A few tears leaked out as Judy hugged her back. “Thanks, Mom.” She pulled away to look up at her with watery eyes. “Can I sleep in one of the guest bedrooms? I’m not up for being around the litter.”

“Well, thankfully, everyone was moved out into their own bedrooms. We left your stuff there, though.” She was given another squeeze. “The room’s all yours.”

Judy buried her nose into her mother’s fur and cried silently. “Thank you, mommy.”

Stu smiled and embraced her before grabbing her things and heading to the truck. One bumpy truck ride and several hours later, she sat on her bed, a fox plushie in her paws. Gideon had given it to her as a gift for her last birthday. Now that she was really looking at it, she was reminded of Nick. A thumb brushed over the button eyes before it was brought to her chest for a snuggle, tears falling a bit harder. 

Brook had given her a lot to think about and while she knew she was right, it still hurt knowing Nick hated her. Almost as much as seeing her big brother, her hero, the one who was as odd as she was…

A light tap on her door and she looked up to see Quintin peeking in at her.

“Hey,” he began with concerned eyes. “Are you okay?”

She nodded and looked back down. “Yeah, I think so.”

“Super crazy about Jack, huh?” Her brother came to sit next to her, bouncing her as he did. Judy only nodded. “I can’t believe Mom and Dad did that to him.”

Half way through another nod, she stopped and looked up at him questioningly. “What?” 

“He didn’t tell you? Everyone in the burrow is freaking out about it. It’s practically divided everyone.” He looked up in thought. “I don’t think I’ve spoken to Mom or Dad since this morning. I’m actually going to do some part time work for the Fleece family tomorrow for money so I can get my food and shit from somewhere else. It’s been pretty fucked up around here.”

“What? What did they do?” 

Quin studied her for a moment before he answered. “Mom told Jack that he either he leaves that vixen or he says goodbye to you and Bunnyburrow.” His paw grasped hers with sympathetic eyes. “I’m sorry he chose her over you.”

Judy looked away, feeling floored. “He didn’t. He broke things off with her and Nick was so angry, he broke things off with me.”

Quin's eyebrows shot up. “Well, at least it must be nice knowing he chose you, right?”

“No.” She shook her head. “Now I just feel worse. I still feel so angry at him, Quin. It’s great he chose me, but I wish he had talked to me about it first. If he had, we could have figured it out together. Like we always do. I would have come back here and found a way to get Mom and Dad to change their minds. But…" She shrugged. "He really is just like everyone else.” Quin studied her in confusion until she continued. “He doesn’t think I could handle anything on my own. He had zero faith in me and what I can do. Jack made the choice for me and I don’t think I can forgive that.”

She looked up at him and he gave her a sad smile. “So… Everything’s gonna suck for a while. Huh?”

“Yup," Judy agreed. 

And together, the siblings sat in silence, waiting for the moment and feeling to pass.

……………………….

Jack listened to the other line ring and ring. This is what happened now. It was only a few hours since he had broken things off with Skye and now there was just this-

“Hello?” The voice, while feminine like Skye’s, sounded much younger, with a hint of confusion and fear.

He cleared his throat to clear it of the drunken slur he knew he would have and tried to not to be thrown. 

“Hi, yes, is Skye there, please?” Just because it wasn’t Skye who answered didn’t mean she wasn’t nearby.

Right?

The young female just sounded more confused, though the fear was gone. “No, I’m sorry. I think you have the wrong number.”

“What?” Jack pulled his phone away from his ear and looked down at the display picture and name. Skye beamed up at him, her name in bold across the top of the. He brought it back to his ear in disbelief. “I- I guess she must have changed it. So sorry to have bothered you. Have a great night.”

He hung up before she could respond and his paw fell to his lap, phone still clutched in it. Numbness. That’s what he expected to feel. What he wanted to feel and was aiming for with the bottle by his feet and drink in his paw. The pain he had anticipated to be overwhelming was exactly that. 

And he felt every. 

Last. 

Bit. 

Drinking deeply, he sat at the foot of his bed, every light in his apartment off. The room reflected the light of the bar behind the ally, illuminating it enough to highlight how empty it now was. Judy was gone. The cafe was dark and silent. The apartment was dark and silent. Skye was gone.

Jack was completely, and utterly, heartbroken.

[twomanyideas]

Fish Slayer

A collaboration by @mdelpin​ and @oryu404​ Slayers Week 2020 Prompt: Adventure Relationships: Gray x Natsu, Sting x Rogue, Natsu & Sting, Natsu & Gajeel AO3

Summary: What appears to be a simple job request goes a little less smoothly than the dragon slayers had anticipated, but from their lack of proper teamwork, an interesting idea is born.

“What’s the matter, Natsu?”

Happy joined his partner in front of the newly remodeled request board, noticing Natsu's unusual lack of interest as he scanned the posted jobs. There was plenty to choose from; even though more than a year had passed, Fiore was still reeling from the aftermath of Tartaros, but Natsu couldn't seem to find a request that excited him.

Natsu's shoulders slumped in disappointment, “I dunno, I’m not really in the mood to find lost items or help around town. I want something that will let me go all out.”

Happy frowned and used his Aera magic to fly up to the board, slowly reading through the slips of paper that were pinned there.

“Natsu, Natsu!” he cried out excitedly.

“Hmm?”

“Did you see this one? It’s asking for you and everything, and fish is part of the reward!!!”

Happy picked the request off the board and gave it to Natsu, who quickly skimmed over it.

Isn't seafood great? Speaking of which, there's been an abnormal number of fish at the beach of late. They're a bit wild for me to handle myself, but they should be no problem for a guild wizard, right? I wanna try some fish! You can have whatever is left over.

Rank: A

Rewards: 27000J, Forefront Talisman

~Rebecca

Happy’s eyes were as big as saucers as he pleaded for his partner to consider the job he’d found.

“Fish, huh? Well, you know I never say no to free food. Let’s do it!” Natsu announced loudly.

“What are you so excited about, Fire Breath?” Gray Fullbuster, Fairy Tail’s resident ice mage, walked up to them, a curious look on his face.

“Believe it or not, Happy finally found a request that offers fish as a reward,” Natsu explained with a chuckle.

He decided to take a chance and asked, “Wanna tag along? It’s been a while since we did a job together.”

Before Gray had a chance to answer, a voice suddenly spoke up from behind them. “I hate to burst your bubble, but check the request again."

The trio turned around, recognizing the voice and in Natsu’s case, the scent of Sabertooth's dragon slayers and their Exceeds. Sting held up a request form similar to the one that Happy had just picked off the board, grinning widely and pointing at the requested mages.

"The client is asking for the dragon slayers, so it looks like you and I will be teaming up, Natsu!"

He looked as excited about this as Happy was about the prospect of getting to eat the leftover fish, talking too much, too fast. Natsu kind of tuned it out as he looked at Gray, feeling a little disappointed because he'd been looking forward to going on a job with him.

Gray frowned moodily at the Twin Dragons, Sting in particular. "You're here again? Don't you have other places to be?"

"Of course not, it's not like either of us is responsible for running a guild or anything,” Rogue responded sarcastically, side-eyeing Sting for emphasis, “But a request is a request, I suppose."

"Oh come on, Rogue," Sting whined back at him. "Gajeel is coming, you like that, right? And Wendy too! It'll be just us dragon slayers. We’ll have a great time!"

"I guess."

"Aye!" Happy chimed in, "not to mention we get all-you-can-eat fish! Everybody loves fish, right?"

"Not particularly," Carla rained on his parade, walking towards them with Wendy, Gajeel, and Panther Lily following close behind.

"Well, you're all Exceeds, and since we're going, you're coming too." Sting completely disregarded Carla's attitude, beaming at her as if he didn't see the glare she threw at him, "I'm sure you'll have fun!"

"You just want to hang out with Natsu," Happy called him out.

"Yep, he just wants to hang out with Natsu," Carla agreed with Happy for once, although she still looked less than thrilled.

Lily, Lector, and Frosch voiced their agreements as well, and at that point, Gray seemed to have had enough of the conversation.

"Knock yourselves out, I'm going on a job of my own," he said, not sparing any of them another look while he ripped the first flyer he could reach off the board. He headed straight for the exit but was stopped by Juvia begging him to take her along, and much to Natsu's dismay, Gray agreed.

Natsu could only stare at the guild doors as they closed behind them, unable to express any of the thoughts or feelings conjuring up a storm inside him.

0-0

They arrived at Akane Beach in the early afternoon. The weather was nice, perfect for a day at the shore, and it showed in the number of visitors present.

Wendy inhaled deeply and smiled happily, "The sea breeze smells so nice. Remember how much fun we had when we came here to train for the Grand Magic Games, Natsu-san?"

They’d come there to train as a team but had ended up spending most of their time in the Celestial World instead. Still, Natsu had fond memories of that trip.

“It was fun,” Natsu agreed as images of days spent swimming, sunbathing, building sandcastles, and having playful competitions of all sorts with Gray brought a smile to his face. Back then, they had just been happy to be alive after their encounter with Acnologia on Tenrou Island. They’d genuinely believed that the worst was behind them.

“I wonder where this Rebecca is,” Gajeel’s gravelly voice interrupted Natsu’s thoughts, bringing him back to the reason they were there.

“Maybe it’s that woman who’s trying to get our attention?” Rogue suggested dryly, pointing to a young woman standing further down the beach, arm raised in an exaggerated wave.

"Fro thinks so, too!"

“Yeah!” Sting agreed, eagerly walking over to meet her but not before telling Natsu, “This time, I’m going to take out more monsters than you.”

“In your dreams,” Natsu snorted, hurrying to reach the girl first.

“Isn’t this supposed to be a team job?” Wendy asked, staring after the two dragon slayers in confusion.

“Yeah,” Gajeel replied, “but you try telling that to those two idiots.”

“It’s like I don’t exist,” Rogue muttered under his breath, causing Gajeel and Wendy to peer at him confusedly.

“Come on, we’d better get to that lady before they make us all look bad,” Gajeel grumbled, speeding up to catch up to Natsu and Sting.

"Hi there! I’m Rebecca, nice to meet you!” the woman greeted them, “ I’m the Vacation Specialist for Akane Resort, thank you so much for coming. I’m glad you could make it so soon!"

"No problem, where are the fish?" Happy cut straight to the chase and was already searching the beach with hungry eyes, much to Natsu’s amusement.

Rebecca started at Happy with wide eyes as she took in the other Exceeds, her gaze softening when she saw Frosch who waved at her cheerily. That seemed to snap her out of it enough to answer Happy’s question.

"They’re a bit further down at our private beach. We closed off the area to prevent anything dangerous from happening to any of our visitors. It would be great if you could take care of this quickly so we can open it up again. There are some holiday cabins we had to keep vacant, and we'd like to make them available as soon as possible."

“I’m on it!” Natsu and Sting chorused before taking off in the direction Rebecca had mentioned with Happy and Lector chasing after them.

The other slayers gave each other an uneasy look but ultimately shrugged, trusting that Natsu and Sting would be fine.

“Is there anything else we should know before we join our colleagues?” Rogue asked, impatient to get moving but wanting to know what they’d be up against.

“Well, a few of the employees we sent to shoo the land whales away ended up frozen,” Rebecca explained, “that’s when we decided to ask the guilds for help.”

“We’ll do our best!” Wendy exclaimed, bowing her head and waving to their client before following the two older slayers across the beach.

Sounds of fighting pushed them to move faster until they found Natsu and Sting already engaging the large fish creatures further down the beach.

What looked to be a pod of fifteen land whales moved along the beach; their eyes fixed on Natsu and Sting. There were three different types: small, gray ones that had a dark, dome-shaped, and glossy organ atop their head, larger ones that were cream-colored, with green domes, and one massive black whale, whose dome was blood red.

“Natsu, not so hot! We won’t be able to eat the fishies if you burn them to a crisp!” Happy cried out, and although Natsu looked like he wanted to complain, the temperature of his attacks decreased.

Lector seemed to have no such concerns when one of Sting’s lasers split one of the smaller whales in half, searing the edges of the cut parts. His enthusiastic cheering managed to drown out Happy’s disapproval.

A loud wail arose from the black land whale, which appeared to be the leader, causing the medium-sized whales to surround the smaller ones. Rogue felt a sudden surge of magic coming from the massive creature and sunk into his shadow, rushing towards Sting.

“Look out!” he managed to yell before re-emerging and shoving his partner out of the way in the nick of time. He’d hoped to evade the vortex that whirled towards them as well, but got hit and found himself encased in ice all the way to his neck instead.

“Oh, great,” he muttered as he tried to release himself from the spell’s grasp.

“Thanks! Are you-" as Sting got back up and noticed Rogue, struggling but otherwise unharmed, he couldn't hold back his giggles. "Oh, I see, you're just chilling."

"Pay attention to the fight, you jackass!"

"Sky Dragon Roar!"

Wendy pushed the whale back with her wind attack, and while Natsu, Sting, and Gajeel continued to fight, she hurried over to Rogue.

“Don’t worry, this should just take a minute,” Wendy assured Rogue, already preparing to cast her next spell.

"Raise!"

Rogue could feel Wendy’s magic working on him, and as promised, the ice that surrounded him was swiftly dispelled.

“Thank you,” he bowed his head graciously before taking his place next to Sting.

“That’s five for me,” Natsu boasted, “How are you doing, Sting?”

“Can we just get this done before someone else gets frozen?” Gajeel grumbled, blocking yet another attack from the enraged whale.

“That’s not fair; you’re just picking off the little ones!” Sting complained as he found himself in a heated battle with one of the medium-sized whales. He watched in disbelief as the enormous creature began to roll around in the sand, faster and faster, its body coming barreling towards him in what looked like a fierce tackle.

“Get out of the way, you fool!” Rogue snapped, too busy with his own whale to be of any help.

"Iron Dragon's Sword!"

Sting breathed in relief as Gajeel’s arm stretched to form a long sword, shoving the whale off course and slicing off its tail. Unfortunately, while he was doing that, the largest whale hit him with his ice attack, and suddenly a very pissed off Gajeel stood frozen, much as Rogue had earlier, his arm still extended.

“I am not picking off the little ones!” Natsu protested, darting to the right and gathering his flames for a roar, directed at the largest whale to counter Sting's argument. His fire made a direct hit, causing the whale to screech in pain and anger, but it didn't take it down just yet.

“Gajeel-san!” Wendy called out, distressed to see another friend frozen. She ran to his side, ignoring Lily’s snickers at Gajeel’s predicament. She cast Raise as soon as she was close enough for it to take effect.

"Shadow Drive!"

Rogue boosted his strength, "Forget your stupid competition, we need to focus on the big one and take it out before it gets Wendy, or we'll all be screwed!"

“I’ll take care of it,” Natsu declared confidently.

“Are you stupid? You’re a fire mage, aren’t you weak against ice?” Rogue scolded.

“In more ways than one,” Gajeel retorted, earning a glare from Natsu and confused looks from the others.

“I’ll be fine,” Natsu explained, “I train against ice all the time, I’ve built up a resistance to it. Just trust me. You guys work on taking the others out.”

“Alright,” Sting agreed, his eyes already fixed on the remaining creatures, “Let’s get this done, everyone call one.”

"Gihi, dibs!" Gajeel ran towards one of the whales, using his iron dragon sword again to slice it up.

"Fire Dragon Sword Horn!"

Sting ignored the sound of Natsu fighting, running towards his target, a whale that was getting ready to attack Wendy.

"Holy Ray!"

Sting watched as his attack hit, creating a massive explosion of bright white light that sent the sand flying around them from its shockwave. He smiled as he felt the sudden warmth that signaled the boosts to his attack and defense capabilities that spell granted, not just to him but also to all his team members.

“Sorry, Happy,” Sting apologized as the Exceed wailed at what remained of the whale, “but it’s time to get serious. Stand back.”

“Thank you, Sting-san,” Wendy called out shyly, having already taken out her whale with her most potent spell, Sky Dragon Wave Wind.

Sting spared a moment to smile at her before moving to Rogue’s side, ready to assist as one of the remaining whales launched itself at him. However, before the attack could land, Rogue had already disappeared into the shadows, popping up behind the whale and finishing it off with his slash attack.

"Was that the last one?" Rogue looked around, eyeing all the whale carcasses and checking for any sign of movement, ready to pounce if necessary.

"Fire Dragon Brilliant Flame!"

The temperature around them rose to almost intolerable levels as Natsu pushed on with his final attack. Even though the whale put in a valiant effort, it was clear that it wasn’t going to last much longer. Still, it managed to pull off one last spell, freezing Natsu just as he landed. The loss of mobility caused Natsu to lose his balance and fall backward, but it wasn’t enough to change the outcome as he'd already released his fireball.

Natsu lay on the sand, staring up at the sky as the others rushed to his side. Wendy prepared to cast her Raise spell but soon noticed her help wouldn’t be needed.

“He put up one hell of a fight,” Natsu remarked cheerfully, his fire already melting the ice that encased him.

“I’m glad that’s over,” Gajeel remarked, looking at the remains of their fight with disgust. The once pristine beach was now littered with fish guts and blood.

“Someone should probably go tell Rebecca we’re done,” Rogue pointed out, and Wendy quickly volunteered with Carla following behind to keep her company.

“Can I eat now?” Happy asked, and it was clear that he was doing his best to wait for approval.

"You want to eat that?" Lector frowned as he looked at the fish remains, "shouldn't we cook it first or something?"

“Why would you want to ruin it?” Happy asked with dismay.

The Exceeds continued to talk in the background, but Rogue tuned them out, his attention drawn to the two reckless morons who stood not ten feet away high-fiving each other seemingly without a care in the world.

“And just what exactly are you two so happy about?” He stomped towards Natsu and Sting, who immediately flashed him their most innocent smiles. "Save it! You just ran off together, without gathering any more information other than our opponents' location, and leaving the rest of us behind!"

"We finished the job together, no harm done," Natsu shrugged, and the complete lack of remorse for his actions only made Rogue more irritated.

"Because we were lucky enough that it was just a pod of land whales we were fighting! What would've happened if you'd run into something unexpected? If it hadn't been a freezing attack, but something more dangerous?"

“But it wasn’t, what’s the use in worrying about something that didn’t happen?” Natsu replied.

“No, he’s right,” Sting joined in, biting his bottom lip in contemplation. “I got excited and forgot everything else, and although it turned out fine in the end, that might not be the case next time.” His moment of reflection ended there, and a big, toothy grin reappeared on his face, “So let’s work hard on our team skills! We’ll do better in the future!” “Team skills? Future?” Rogue gawked at him, “Are you saying you want to do this again?”

“We can talk about this later,” Sting declared, pointing at Wendy and Rebecca’s approaching figures, along with some other guy they hadn’t met when they arrived. “For now, we should start cleaning up some of the mess we made.”

Rogue frowned, clenching his jaws to keep from expressing how much he hated the idea of being forced to watch Sting choose Natsu over him time and time again.

“Goodness, you sure made short work of them,” Rebecca practically beamed at the slayers, “Too bad it ended up being so messy, but I suppose it couldn’t be helped.”

The man had already ventured over to the beach, wielding a large knife he used to check the state of the different corpses.

“That’s Carlton,” Rebecca explained, “he’s one of the resort’s chefs. You are welcome to help yourselves to as much fish as you want after he has selected the ones he wants for tonight’s specials.”

“There should be plenty for everyone,” Rebecca assured Happy, whose ears had drooped at the sight of Carlton claiming his fishies.

More employees arrived, and Rebecca and Carlton divided them into groups, some assigned to clean up, while the others began to lug the land whales back to the hotel’s kitchen. The dragon slayers offered to help, but Rebecca told them just to sit and relax until she could get back to her office for their reward. They soon received the jewels, the lacrima, and as a bonus, they were offered to stay in one of the cabins overnight as part of their reward, which they quickly accepted.

Once Rebecca realized Natsu was a fire mage, she asked him to help her set up a large bonfire for the guests. Sting and Wendy helped him gather some wood from the nearby nature trail, while Gajeel and Rogue sat down on a couple of lounge chairs set under a large thatch parasol just in front of their cabin. They remained quiet for a few minutes before the Iron Dragon Slayer gave a frustrated sigh. “Look, I’m not one to get involved where I don’t belong, but you’ve got the wrong idea about the Salamander.”

“What do you mean?” Rogue took his eyes off Lector and Frosch, who were busy making sculptures out of the sand, and stared at him, confused.

“Fire Dragon Roar!”

The sound of Natsu yelling out his spell startled them momentary, both forgetting Rebecca’s request as each instinctively searched the beach for more land whales.

In typical Natsu fashion, he overdid it, and the flames shot up higher than any sane person would appreciate. Still, his laugh was infectious, and the way Wendy clapped her hands in admiration was adorable, so when Sting ran over to get them both, Gajeel and Rogue followed him, their conversation forgotten.

They moved their portion of the fish to their cabin, and dashed right back out to the beach, not wanting to waste a minute of the remaining daylight. Sting, Natsu, and Rogue spent some time body surfing, while Gajeel and Lily watched over Wendy and the Exceeds.

Hotel guests and tourists alike soon arrived, enticed by Natsu’s fire. They sat in lounge chairs or on bright towels, and the atmosphere became festive as the hotel band began to play on a small stage.

When the evening fell, and most of the other beachgoers had returned to their accommodations, the slayers took advantage of the cabin to wash up and eat. As Rebecca had anticipated, there had been plenty of fish left over, more than they could ever eat, but they put in a good effort. Gajeel sliced up the meat; Rogue seasoned it using some salt and pepper he’d found in the small kitchenette, while Natsu made quick work of the cooking.

"Man, I’m stuffed.” Sting collected their empty plates and tasked himself with washing them, delighted to see Wendy joining him for the drying. “See? We can totally do the teamwork thing,” he smiled at the others over his shoulder, “and we had lots of fun today, right?” “Aside from the part where I became a popsicle, yeah, it wasn’t too bad,” Rogue said after giving it some thought.

Natsu valiantly tried to hold his laughter in, but hearing Gajeel’s gihi worked against him, “Rogue’s face,” he howled, his arms coming up to his stomach as he laughed.

“What’s so damn funny? Both of you got frozen too!” Rogue snapped, still finding it hard to see the humor in the situation.

“Yeah,” Gajeel agreed good-naturedly, “thank god for the Squirt, huh?”

“She was the only one of you to be helpful in any way.”

“So it’s settled then, we’re teaming up,” Sting announced.

“Wait. What?!” Natsu and Gajeel chorused.

“I don’t recall being asked,” Natsu protested loudly, “Besides, I already have a team.”

“Yeah, Glowstick, don’t go around making decisions for us,” Gajeel muttered, “Salamander and the Squirt might like to do the team thing, but Lily and I work alone.”

“I don’t mean a permanent team; I just mean going out on a job together once a week or so, maybe get some training in. You guys can do your regular thing the rest of the time.”

“Well, isn’t that gracious of you,” Gajeel’s voice dripped with sarcasm.

“Look, the fact of the matter is that Acnologia is going to come back sooner or later,” Sting reminded them, “As we are now, we have no chance in hell of beating him.”

He headed off Natsu’s dismissals by pointing out the one thing he couldn’t deny, “You guys can’t even go into Dragon Force at will yet. But maybe if we train hard and learn how to work together, the next time he makes an appearance, we’ll be ready for him. We owe it to our dragons to try our best.”

Sting was surprised by Natsu’s reaction to his words. His fists clenched at his sides, and whether he realized it or not, he’d covered his body in a thin layer of flames. His expression was the most confusing of all - it was utterly devoid of emotion- something Sting couldn’t remember having ever seen before.

“He has a point, Natsu-san,” Wendy hugged herself tightly, “Our magic is the only one that has any chance of taking him out, and we’ll need to get a lot stronger if we’re ever going to beat him.”

Natsu chewed his lip thoughtfully as he gazed at Wendy, “Alright, if Wendy’s in, then I guess I am too. What about you, Bucket Head?”

“Are you allergic to using each other’s names or something?” Rogue rolled his eyes.

“Why? Does it bother you, Mopey?” Gajeel baited before turning to Pantherlily. “Well, what do you think, Lily?”

“Why are you asking your Exceed?” Sting asked, puzzled.

“I’ll have you know Lily’s not just any Exceed; he was a First Division Commander in the Edolas Royal Army. You could stand to learn a thing or two from him,” Gajeel bragged, “More importantly, though, he’s my partner.”

“I think it’s a sound strategy to ally ourselves with the other dragon slayers,” Lily nodded his approval.

“Then, I guess we’re in as well,” Gajeel announced, “but don’t for a minute think this means you’re the boss of me, Euclifffe. You might be a guild master, but on this team, you’re just another dragon slayer.”

“Gajeel-san!” Wendy scolded, horrified by his rudeness.

“It’s okay, he’s right,” Sting waved away the insult, “If we’re going to do this, it has to be as equals. What about you, Rogue, what do you say?” He grinned at his partner, confident he knew the answer.

Natsu got up from his chair as soon as Gajeel answered. “I’m gonna go outside and check on the fire,” he muttered before exiting the cabin.

Rogue peered at Sting, debating his response. “Does it even matter what I say?" he bit back the rest of his words, noticing the tension that hung around them, and not wanting to make it worse, but he did make a point of staring at the door through which Natsu had just left.

"Huh? What do you mean? Of course it does," Sting said perplexed, his gaze ping-ponging between Rogue, the two other slayers, and the cabin door as he tried to figure out why the conversation had taken a turn for the worse.

“He doesn’t mean anything by it,” Gajeel explained, “He hasn’t been the same since he came back from his training thing.”

“Oh, crap! I didn’t think when I brought up what happened at Tartaros,” Sting groaned, understanding his mistake, “I didn’t realize he was still upset about it.”

“It’s getting late,” Carla interrupted, recognizing the conversation would probably only become more upsetting, “You should get to bed, Wendy.”

“But-” Wendy’s eyes were fixed on the cabin’s door.

“No buts, Natsu will be fine. He just wants some time alone,” Carla insisted.

“Don’t worry, Squirt, I’ll go check on him in a bit,” Gajeel declared, and that seemed to be enough to reassure Wendy.

“I suppose,” she looked down, smiling fondly when she noticed Happy was fast asleep. “I guess I should get him to bed, goodnight everyone,” she scooped the sleeping Exceed into her arms and followed Carla to her bedroom.

Rogue did the same, picking up Lector and Frosch, who had been snoring alongside Happy and taking them to one of the other rooms. He left without saying another word.

“Is there anything we can do to help?” Sting asked Gajeel.

“I think there’s only one person who can help him through this, but he’s not here at the moment,” Gajeel replied thoughtfully, “but I’ll give it a shot in his place.”

Sting raised an eyebrow at that, but when Gajeel didn’t expand on who it was, he decided to leave it alone. It wasn’t any of his business anyway.

“Later,” Gajeel said before going off in search of Natsu.

"Later…" Sting put the last of the dishes away and looked around the cabin. Only he and Lily were left, but the exceed was already hopping off his seat, giving him a quick nod before heading off towards the bedroom he would be sharing with Gajeel.

Nothing had gone how Sting had imagined when they'd agreed to stay in the cabin together for the night. He'd expected, or at least hoped that the idea of teaming up would be received with a bit more enthusiasm, that they'd all grow a little closer, but it felt as if the opposite was true. He guessed he'd been too optimistic.

0-0

Lector and Frosch were sleeping peacefully, each tucked in one of the beds that were on opposite ends of the small bedroom. Rogue sat down on his bed next to Frosch, debating whether he should go back to the living room or just sleep. It had been a long day, and he wasn’t looking forward to any more discussions. He smiled fondly when Frosch mumbled something in their sleep, distracted just enough to calm down a little. He’d been internalizing his emotions all day, letting them simmer to the point where he’d been this close to boiling over and saying things he’d only regret later. Maybe he should just sleep it off and face it with some fresh energy again in the morning, save his woes for another day.

Just as he’d made peace with that idea, having already taken off his boots and jacket to store away into the empty closet, there was a soft knock at the door.

“Hey, are you still up?” the whisper of Sting’s voice sounded from behind the bedroom door, and Rogue had to repress an exasperated groan. After feeling bypassed and replaced all day, he wasn’t sure if he should be happy or annoyed that his partner was coming to check on him, but he couldn’t bring himself to ignore Sting either. He never could.

“What is it?” Rogue opened the door, hating the way his heart skipped a beat at the sight of his partner, and that stupid, sheepish, disarming smile he flashed him.

“I don’t know, you seemed mad. Can we talk about it?”

“I wasn’t mad,” Rogue stepped out of the bedroom, closing the door behind him and walking over to the kitchenette to pour a glass of water. “I was disappointed.”

“Okay, somehow that feels worse,” Sting frowned, following and observing him closely. “So why were you disappointed?”

“Because-” Rogue stared into his glass, thinking about what he wanted to say, “because you keep raving about this team stuff, but you seem to have forgotten we are a team. You didn’t even bother to discuss this with me first. I was the last one to give an opinion.”

“And it’s not just that,” he continued before Sting had a chance to respond. ”It’s like you don’t care about what I think at all lately. After the Grand Magic Games, we vowed to rebuild Sabertooth from the ground up- together, but instead, you keep looking to Fairy Tail to improve our guild. I don’t want to be them; I want to be us.”

He cringed internally upon hearing himself saying that last part, even though he knew Sting was way too dense to recognize its hidden meaning.

“I never realized that’s how you felt about it...” Sting said, looking genuinely dismayed. “I do care about what you think, but…I don't know, I just want to do a good job, but I have no idea what I'm doing. I guess I didn't want you to notice."

“You’re still scared to fuck up," Rogue nodded, recognizing that feeling all too well. It was a habit that was hard to break after years of fearing punishment for having failed. "Well, that makes two of us, so can we at least trust in each other for back up again, like we always have?"

"Yeah, of course," Sting was happy to agree, "I'm sorry for forgetting that in the first place."

He caught Rogue completely off guard by pulling him into a hug, almost making him drop the glass. Rogue didn't dare ask where this sudden affection came from, afraid that the words would come out wrong, and it would be the first and the last time.

"So, what do you think about teaming up with the other dragon slayers?" Sting asked, pulling away just as quickly again. "If you're out, then I am as well."

"I-I, uh…" Rogue stammered, still a bit perplexed, "yeah, let's do it."

"Alright, let's go tell the others then," Sting smiled, but then pouted again as he remembered Natsu storming off earlier. "I should apologize to Natsu as well. I should've known better than to bring up our dragons so casually."

Rogue finished his water and placed the empty glass back on the counter. "Yeah, you're downright rude sometimes," he grinned, unable to resist teasing his partner about his lack of tact. “But you heard Gajeel, it’ll be fine.” He offered Sting a reassuring smile before following him outside, feeling less tired already.

0-0

Natsu closed the cabin’s door behind him, taking a few small breaths to try to calm down his racing emotions. Once he felt a little better, he took off his shoes, enjoying the feel of the cool sand against his feet.

He headed towards the remains of the bonfire, the flames he’d conjured earlier had mostly turned to embers, but he built them back up to the size of a regular campfire before sitting down next to it. Wrapping his arms around his knees, he stared off at the waves, attempting to fight off the melancholy that Sting’s words had reawakened.

His training journey hadn’t been anything like he’d expected. His power and stamina had undoubtedly increased, a testament to all the hard work he’d put into his efforts to get stronger so he could defeat anyone who came his way. So that he’d never again be forced to watch as someone he loved was taken away from him. But despite his best attempts at fulfilling his promise to Igneel to look to the future, all he could do was focus on his past failures.

It was more than that though, Igneel had been his future, and now that he’d been taken away from him, Natsu felt lost. He’d hoped that once he saw his friends again, he’d get back to his usual self, or at the very least that Gray or Erza would beat this feeling out of him, but it hadn’t worked out that way.

Instead, Lucy had been angry with him for leaving, while Gray had joined a dark cult. And even though it had turned out to be part of an undercover mission for Erza, Natsu could tell that his friend had changed. Whether it was due to his new magic or the things he’d experienced while being a part of that cult, Natsu had no way of knowing.

Even worse, Gray had moved in with Juvia during his absence, dashing any hopes Natsu had held that the ice mage might return his feelings.

He sighed in discontent, he was trying to be what everyone expected of him, but it was so exhausting, especially when all he wanted was to train and hide out in his house.

“Wendy’s worried about you.”

Natsu turned his head to find Gajeel standing beside him. He’d gotten so caught up in his thoughts he hadn’t detected him at all.

“She shouldn’t, I’m fine.”

“Sure you are,” Gajeel snorted before sitting next to him and gazing out at the ocean. “It’s nice here. I’d never been here before today.”

“Yeah, I’ve always liked this beach,” Natsu replied, ignoring the dragon slayer’s comment.

“So, what do you really think about Sting’s little idea?” Gajeel grabbed a twig and stuck it in the fire, creating a small torch that he waved around lazily in front of him.

Natsu shrugged, “It can’t hurt, right? Besides, if it gives us any kind of edge against Acnologia, we’d be fools to say no. We should probably talk to Sting about including Laxus and Cobra.”

“Won’t that be fun?” Gajeel visibly grimaced at the thought.

Natsu snorted, “How much d’you wanna bet Laxus zaps Sting ten minutes after meeting him?”

“I suppose you’d know better than anyone,” Gajeel pointed out with a shrug.

Natsu grinned in acknowledgment, struggling to keep the smile plastered on his face.

“You don’t have to do that on my account,” Gajeel commented, “Frankly, you don’t have to do that at all.”

Natsu peered at him in confusion, “Do what?”

“Act like nothing’s wrong, you’re not fooling anyone with that shit.”

“I’m -,” Natsu tried to argue that he was fine but found he couldn’t get the words out, “What am I supposed to do?”

“Hell if I know. Yell, cry or, I dunno get up the balls to talk to the one person who understands what you’re going through.”

“I can’t.”

“Why? Cause you got the hots for him?”

“I don’t!” Natsu was quick to deny the accusation, but when Gajeel smirked at him, he couldn’t hold his gaze, and the Iron Dragon Slayer only laughed knowingly.

“There’s no point now,” Natsu admitted, slumping his shoulders in defeat, “he’s already made his choice.”

“Know that for a fact, do you?” Gajeel rolled his eyes at him, “Never figured you for a coward.”

“I’m not a coward!” Natsu snapped, he could feel his anger stirring at the taunt, but it wasn’t enough to overcome his gloom. “You wouldn’t understand.”

Gajeel startled him by being the one to look away, “You’d be surprised.”

Before Natsu had a chance to ask what he meant by that, Gajeel changed the subject, “So, how long have you been lusting after the Ice Prick?”

“It’s not like that!” Natsu protested, offended by the implication that his feelings for Gray would be that shallow.

“Fine, fine, how long have you been moping over your everlasting love and devotion for the Ice Princess?”

“Ugh, why do you have to be such an asshole about it?” Natsu complained, “Probably since Galuna, although I didn’t exactly realize it at first.”

“I’m surprised that you realize it now,” Gajeel snorted before his eyes narrowed and his tone changed to grudging respect, “Wait, Galuna? Wasn’t that the S-Class Mission you took without permission?”

“You went on an S-Class mission without permission?” Sting asked excitedly.

“Tact, Sting,” Rogue sighed. “What he meant to say is, are we interrupting anyt-”

“Yeah, we did! Completed it too!” Natsu grinned proudly, purposefully not mentioning how it would have been impossible without Erza’s help.

“What’s an S-Class mission like?” Sting asked, his eagerness showing in the way he was practically bouncing on the balls of his feet.

“Sabertooth doesn’t have S-Class?”

“Nah, we’re trying to get something going, but it’s going to take a while. The council has bigger things to worry about right now, ” Sting explained, “So your mission, what was it like?” He plopped down on the sand next to Natsu and Gajeel, Rogue following suit.

“We had to destroy the moon,” Natsu couldn’t resist the opportunity to tease Sting.

Rogue blinked slowly, “Destroy the moon?” He looked up at the night sky, where the moon was still very much present. “Why would anyone want that?”

“The island’s inhabitants were cursed, and they blamed the moon,” Natsu explained, “They thought if we destroyed it, their curse would be broken.”

“I can see you and the Bunny Girl doing something that stupid, but how the hell did you talk the Ice Prick into it?” Gajeel asked with interest.

Natsu laughed nervously, having conveniently forgotten that part, “Uhm, well, you see, Gramps sent him to bring us back. Gray found us when we were trying to convince a boat captain to take us the island. He wouldn’t listen to reason, so I knockedhimout, tiedhimup, and put him in the boat,” he said, knitting the words together, eager to return to the part of the story where he didn’t sound like an asshole.

“You knocked him out and tied him up?!” Gajeel roared, slapping his knee as he laughed, “I can just picture his face when he came to.”

“Well, it would’ve been fine if the boat hadn’t capsized,” Natsu defended himself.

“Boat?” Sting looked green, just thinking about it.

“I don’t even know where to begin,” Rogue muttered, horrified by pretty much every word that came out of Natsu’s mouth.

“Anyway, it was pretty complicated; this group was trying to use Moon Drip to help free a Demon of Zeref that was encased in ice underneath this old temple’s ruins.”

Natsu quickly realized that he shouldn’t have started discussing this mission. He didn’t feel like he had the right to tell others about Gray and Lyon’s conflict, especially since Sting and Rogue knew both of them. But now that he’d started, he couldn’t very well just stop, could he?

“We fought them off, but then the leader ordered the village destroyed and all its inhabitants killed. Obviously, we kicked their asses, but it didn’t help with the demon issue. I managed to tilt the temple enough so that the Moon Drip couldn’t reach the demon, but another mage showed up and used this crazy magic to undo it, ” Natsu glared, still annoyed by Ultear’s dirty trick.

“Next thing I know, the demon was released from its seal, and Gray tried to cast a spell he’d learned from his Master, so I stopped him. Good thing too, the demon was already dead.”

“Wait, I don’t get it, why would you stop him?” Sting’s brows furrowed as he tried to figure out what Natsu was leaving out.

“Because, it would have killed him,” Gajeel guessed, flashing him a look of understanding that Natsu immediately disliked. “Am I right?”

“Yeah, it’s a spell that’s powered by the caster’s spirit, it transforms their body into an unmeltable ice prison.”

“There are spells like that?” Rogue marveled, “That’s horrible.”

“Stupid Ice Princess,” Natsu growled, still furious that Gray would even consider such a thing.

“You really care about him a lot, don’t you?” Sting’s smile was warm, “Have you been friends for long?”

“Uhm, I don’t know if I’d call us friends, but we’ve been fighting each other since we were kids,” Natsu rubbed the back of his neck, not knowing how to explain their weird friendship.

“Anyhow, we won, but it turned out none of that had anything to do with the curse. Erza was the one who finally figured it out,” Natsu admitted. “S-Class quests are hard.”

“Wait, when did Erza get there?”

“Oh, some time while I was working on the temple, I guess,” Natsu shrugged, “She commandeered a pirate ship to take her there. She was sent to take us back to the guild when we didn’t return.”

“That whole thing sounds so cool,” Sting grinned, “I can’t wait to go on a mission like that!”

“I thought it was just you, but your entire team is insane,” Rogue gaped at Natsu, who could only smile sheepishly in reply.

“Oh, you don’t know the half of it, Wendy’s the only sane one in the whole bunch,” Gajeel confided with a playful grin, “The stories I could tell.”

“I bet we’ll have even more fun when we go on jobs,” Sting exclaimed excitedly.

Rogue groaned, “I hope not, I don’t know if I can handle that much, uhm fun.”

“Where should we train?” Natsu asked, getting caught up in Sting’s enthusiasm.

“Knowing you two, as far away from any cities as we can possibly get,” Gajeel teased Sting and Natsu.

Rogue snorted, before adding “I saw on one of the requests I was looking at earlier this morning that there were some tough monsters in Mikage Forest. We could start there?”

“Tough monsters? Count me in!” Natsu bumped fists with an equally excited Sting. Even Gajeel looked enthused by the idea.

“Natsu, does your team have a set schedule?” Sting asked.

“Not really, Erza’s the one who usually picks our jobs,” he admitted, “but I don’t think she’ll mind if we let her know ahead of time.”

“Then, we could get started as soon as next week?” Rogue asked, and when Natsu and Gajeel nodded, he declared, “Great, I’ll put together a list of potions that I’ll expect everyone to bring, just in case.”

The other slayers all groaned, but no one argued the point. “Did you plan on talking to Laxus and Cobra?” Natsu asked, suddenly remembering he’d mentioned them to Gajeel earlier.

“Oh yeah! I didn’t think about those guys,” Sting admitted, “Do you think they’d want to?”

Natsu shrugged, “Won’t know unless you ask.”

“True.”

“Hey, about the dragons,” Sting started, dropping his cheerful act and staring at the sand. “I uh, wanted to apologize for earlier. I didn’t mean to upset you. Sometimes I forget it was different for you guys,” he explained, looking remorseful.

“Don’t worry about it, I’m still having a hard time accepting that he’s gone,” Natsu admitted, “but it’s getting better.” Sting lay back on the sand, staring at the stars with interest. “Do you think we did this when we were little?”

“Did what?”

“You know, hang out. I mean, I don’t remember much, but it sounds like our dragons knew each other.” Sting pointed out.

Natsu couldn’t help but notice that Sting sounded wistful, “I don’t know. I don’t remember much either, but I guess it’s possible. You guys would have been younger than us then,” he smiled, thinking of what that might have been like.

“For the longest time, I thought I was the only one,” Natsu recalled, “until I met Gajeel and then Wendy.” “I thought the same before I met Sting. It’s nice to have someone who understands, and I know we all disagree on a lot of things, but I’m glad we met each other.” Rogue smiled, looking genuinely content for the first time that day.

“I suppose I can put up with the lot of you, now and again,” Gajeel muttered.

“I think this team thing is gonna be fun,” Natsu proclaimed, finding himself looking forward to embarking on a new adventure.

They’d keep getting stronger, and when the time was right, Acnologia wouldn’t know what hit him.

@ftguildevents​

[sagehaleyofficial]

HERE’S WHAT YOU MISSED THIS WEEK (11.27-12.3.19):

NEW MUSIC:

·         Former Black Veil Brides bassist Ashley Purdy broke his silence on Twitter by announcing he has new music in the works. The musician began teasing the new songs last Tuesday, following it shortly with an Instagram link.

·         A Day to Remember revealed the reasoning behind delay of the release of their seventh record You’re Welcome. Guitarist Kevin Skaff went on to state the reasoning for the album delay, saying they want every aspect of the LP to be just right.

·         Following the release of I Don’t Know How but They Found Me’s Christmas Drag EP earlier this month, “Oh Noel” marks the second offering after “Merry Christmas Everybody.” Just like its jolly predecessor, “Oh Noel” is filmed in purposefully low-res quality. 

·         YouTube icons Rhett & Link, Rhett McLaughlin and Link Neal, performed a Christmas collaboration on their show Good Mythical Morning over the weekend. They gave Blink-182’s “All the Small Things” a new meaning with their holiday-themed lyrics.

TOUR ANNOUNCEMENTS:    

·         Hey Monday’s Cassadee Pope held her much-anticipated #HeyItsMonday pop-punk night in Nashville. The night had several appearances from members of Mae, the Bigger Lights, the Audition, Brighten, A Rocket to the Moon, Lit, and the All-American Rejects.

·         Motion City Soundtrack revealed their main support for their upcoming reunion tour, as well as a slew of other opening bands. Currently, the main support consists of The Sidekicks, Mat Kerekes (Citizen), Mom Jeans., White Reaper and Treaty of Paris.

·         YUNGBLUD was set to perform a private concert at Hanford High School in California, but the show has since been canceled due to request. The singer took to Instagram today to ask people not to judge others, and to assure his fans at Hanford High School that he will still be there.

·         Blink-182 performed a new song with the Chainsmokers when the duo invited them onstage at their stop in Los Angeles at The Forum for the World War Joy Tour. The set comes months after the electronic duo revealed on Twitter that both bands were working on a new song together.

·         Following their first show announcement in September, WhoHurtYou took to the stage for the first time last Tuesday in Los Angeles at the Moroccan Lounge. Their live debut was supported by FRND (aka producer Andrew Goldstein).

·         Slam Dunk announced the third wave of artists joining the lineup for next year’s festival, including Movements, Reel Big Fish, Comeback Kid and more. Fit for a King, Deez Nuts, Refused, Young Guns, Free Throw, Mom Jeans. and more also round out the lineup.

·         Gwen Stefani appeared on last week’s episode of The Voice, where she was tearing through three of the big hits off her debut solo record. Stefani kicked off the performance with the intro to “What You Waiting For?” before sliding into “Hollaback Girl” and “Rich Girl.”

·         Derek Sanders and Alex Garcia of Mayday Parade performed some classic hits with former member, Jason Lancaster, at a Defining Moment and Kid Named Chicago charity show. Recently, Lancaster’s band Go Radio announced their reunion and released a new track.

·         Five Finger Death Punch kicked off a new era with the release of a new song “Inside Out.” With the new track comes an epic spring tour with Ice Nine Kills, I Prevail and Papa Roach supporting.

OTHER NEWS:  

·         Twenty One Pilots drummer Josh Dun is approaching one year since proposing to longtime girlfriend and actress, Debby Ryan. One of the drummer’s guests won’t be able to make it, as Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson hit him back with some advice on Twitter.

·         Fall Out Boy lead singer Patrick Stump and bassist Pete Wentz will be making an appearance on the popular morning game show The Price is Right on CBS in 2020. Starting in 2019, the show featured a different music genre every day for Music Week with guests leading up the Grammys.

·         Vans threw it back to the days of Volkswagen Buses, flair jeans and 8-track tapes with the all-new tie-dye pattern for their Old Skool and Style 53 slip-on styles. The shoe features re-enforced toecaps, padded collars for flexible support and signature rubber waffle outsoles.

·         My Chemical Romance guitarist Frank Iero is participating in a charity auction to win a signed, smashed guitar that he played at some point in the early to mid-2000s. Donated to the Innocent Lives Foundation, the bidding ends this Saturday night.

·         SWMRS shared new photos and an update on guitarist Max Becker, following the accident back in October. The band account shared a photo of Becker on Instagram, along with the countless get well letters and cards hanging on the wall.

·         Emo Nite LA are dropping a holiday collection of merchandise with a portion of proceeds being donated to the American Society for Suicide Prevention. The new limited-edition line includes a holiday sweater, mug and Christmas ornament with their “Holidays are Emotional” tag.

·         Fall Out Boy fans are in for quite the holiday treat as the band unveiled a limited edition Pete Wentz bass. Featured as part of their holiday merch drop, the bass comes in two epic color options and is limited to 50 units each.

___

Check in next Tuesday for more “Posi Talk with Sage Haley,” only at @sagehaleyofficial!

[mysticsparklewings]

I will be with You

When you go, just know that I will remember you If living was the hardest part, we'll then one day be together And in the end we'll fall apart, just as the leaves change in color And then I will be with you, I will be there one last time now --My Chemical Romance, "It's Not a Fashion Statement, it's a Deathwish" ____ It's rare that I'm this proud of an artwork I've created. ^_^ Usually, there's some glaring issue or just an assortment of small things I'd still change if I had the patience and/or artistic ability to do it. Or even just some things that I feel like could've been done better, even if I know it did the best I could. This time? No. Not right now, shortly after it's been completed, anyway. I'm sure years down the line from now I'll look back and feel at least slightly different. But as it stands now, while I'm sure it has its faults, I am truly happy and truly proud of what I've created here and whatever faults are there aren't bothering me at all. So what then is this, exactly? This my dear Sparklers is a visual love letter to the band I discovered just a little too late but was still there for me when no one else was all the same. Earlier this month, I uploaded a different piece of art to celebrate the announcement of My Chemical Romance's Return, but even when I uploaded that one I was already thinking of doing another one, this time something that was more obviously fan art. But not just fan art as I've done for them in the past (Exhibit A, Exhibit B, and Exhibit C), but something extra-special and fun. I really did go into creating this wanting it to be as I described it above; a visual love letter to this band that I love so much and could not be happier that they're back. As such, I've squeezed in as many references as I could: 1. The female figure is molded after Helena from the album Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge 2. The male/skeleton figure is supposed to be Pepe (that's what Google said his name was, anyway), the icon and seemingly marching band conductor from The Black Parade album 3. On Pepe's hat, I replaced the usual symbol with the Candle symbol that's been featured in the band's Return artwork 4. They fade into leaves based on the line from It's Not a Fashion Statement, It's a Deathwish (a song from Three Cheers) that I quoted at the top of the description 5. behind them is Party Poison's mask, as featured in the Danger Days music videos 6. on the mask, I replaced one of the black triangle shapes with the hanging man silhouette from I Brought You My Bullets, You Brought Me Your Love 7. The rest of the background is inspired by the covers for the Conventional Weapons releases (which in my mind I count as essentially an unofficial fifth album) (Debatable) 8. Their touching hands could be an indirect reference to the line "And as we're touching hands, and as we're falling down" from Demolition Lovers, a song from Bullets. That's at least one reference each (Three Cheers technically got two) for each of the main releases, plus one directly related to this new era we don't know much about yet. It's not an exhaustive "spot the reference" game, but I'm glad I was able to incorporate as many as I did. Now that I've explained them, maybe I can talk about my process without having to stop to re-explain each reference as they come up.   After some brainstorming, I got this image in my head of Helena and Pepe in this pose (inspired at least partially by this pre-existing fanart I've seen many times before) , which to me is a "renaissance dancing" pose but I'm sure there's some other better way to describe it I haven't thought of. I tried for a very long time to find a reference image of this exact pose to help me get the proportions and general anatomy right within my own stylization, but for the life of me, I couldn't find anything close enough to suit me and I really didn't want to have to settle for something else. As such, I'm sure the proportions and anatomy are off, but even so, I think I did pretty good considering. The main issues I ran into during sketching were mainly balancing the energy between the two characters--which I do think I managed in the end--Helena's skirt, as she's supposed to be holding onto it with that hand you can't see, and Pepe's torso. Originally, I was planning on doing this piece traditionally, but once the sketch was finished it almost immediately clicked into place that I'd be better served to do it digitally, considering what I wanted to do with the mask in the background already, as well as the leaf-fade. (The Conventional Weapons reference hadn't been planned yet, and it was technically only made possible later on by this piece being digital.) Luckily, doing things digitally meant that Pepe's torso was fixed pretty easily. It was too thin in the sketch, but all I had to do was select the right lines and move them out a bit in Photoshop. He's still a bit thin and not super buff, but personally I'm letting that go because...I mean, he's at least part if not all skeleton. If anyone's going to be too thin, wouldn't it make sense that it's him? Helena's skirt I did end up happy within the sketch but...we'll come back to the skirt in a moment. Pepe's...face? looked a bit odd in the sketch, but other than that, once I was happy with that foundation, I scanned it in and got to work on digitizing everything. I went over my lines for Helena and Pepe the way I normally would for something like this if a little intentionally messy instead of trying to get them super clean--as I thought that might be appropriate here--and then I paused with them to work on the mask behind them. The mask admittedly came out very poorly in the sketch, just because I bothered to look up no references for it whatsoever once I decided I was going to make this digital and I knew I could just draw half of it and flip it over. And I'm glad I didn't start trying to follow my sketch lines for it at all because looking up actual references showed me that would've been way off. While I had my reference up, I ended up going in and basically full-coloring and detailing the mask right then. That's the beauty of digital work; a lot of steps can be done basically out of order from how you'd have to do them traditionally and it doesn't matter because you can just move layers around and adjust effects later. I went with this pseudo-soft shading based on the colors and shadows I was seeing in my references, even though I wasn't sure yet exactly how I was going to shade Helena and Pepe. I figured that even if I used a different method for them that I could either go back and adjust the mask as necessary or that it wouldn't matter since the mask was part of the background anyway. Once that was done, I went back to ponder my two figures and the leaf effect that I wanted to do with them. And again, I went a little out of order here, as I ended up filling in the silhouette of Helena and Pepe with a blanket layer of gray so I could see how them blocking the mask was going to look (and I figured based on past experiences I might need the blanket layer in white later). From there, I went into working on the fading-to-leaves effect. My logic was that I'd need mostly the silhouettes of the leaves and then I'd get what I wanted after playing with layer effects or something. This assumption ended up being correct, but we're not there yet. As I worked, I kept looking at my "finished" messy lines. Something just didn't feel right. Honestly, I couldn't tell you where the idea to do this lineless look came from, but it got in my head as I was working and I kept looking at the lines I had and not being happy to just color those in as I normally would, shade it, and call it a day. I tried. I tried really hard to ignore the urge to at least try it and carry on as I was. I'd already come this far, and I'd be done so much faster if I stuck to the plan...But!! Clearly I lost that argument with myself. You know what though? I'm glad I did! I don't think I've ever done lineless art like this before, not counting my watercolor work where that's just part of the process to me. But digital? Certainly not. Human figures? Also no. I've come close in the sense that I've shaded my art before, turned off the line layers before, and thought, "oh hey that almost works without the lines because of the shading,"  but not much farther than that. Naturally, I wasn't even sure how or where to begin, so I went with what came naturally to me. I started by just filling in the lines as I normally would have, and then I went back layer by layer and went back and forth between having the line layer (with the opacity brought down somewhat already so I could sort of see what I was doing) on and off to try and balance the shapes between what they looked like with and without the lines. It's weird because if you ever try this, it's a little like having to figure out a bunch of individual silhouettes that make one whole one, except you need them to be a little more defined if you want them to make visual sense. That step and the next one, the shading, are tied in my mind for which one took me the longest. For the shading, I really just went in blind, using hard-edge cell shading, though originally I planning to come back with some soft shading in certain areas later. The soft shading ended up not happening partly because I liked it much better than I thought I would without it, and I thought the hard-edge shading made the figures pop a little more compared to the background. The thing about this was the same issue I run into with my lines nowadays; to get smooth shapes I spend a while going back and forth between putting color down and erasing it, and sometimes undoing and redoing the same line a dozen times to get it right in one stroke. But that's really my own fault for being stubborn and trying to work solely within Photoshop and not use other programs, as I know good and well I'd have less of that issue if I'd hop into Paint Tool Sai and use the linework layers in there. What can I say? I live up to my Capricorn sign by being as stubborn as a goat. Anyway. The biggest challenge to figure out the shading for was Helena's skirt. I think I would've still had issues with that though even if I colored and shaded my normal way, with the lines and everything. It's just the position it's in that complicates things. I actually did a good amount of shading in reverse here, where I'd make the base layer the shadow color and then the layer on top would be the regular color, as in some cases it just seemed easier to do that than the other way around. The part of Helena's dress around the top, for example. Or Pepe's pants (what little you can see of them). Additionally, I ended up leaving the feather attached to Pepe's hat alone and not really smoothing it out, as I thought the roughness and inconsistencies worked really well to make it seem more feathery. With enough patience and persistence and much back and forth among the various layers, I made it through all of that. I was a little concerned at first about some of my color choices and if the shading was too harsh in some places or not, but I mellowed out as I worked and ended up not making make adjustments after the fact. For instance, originally I thought I'd go back and make Pepe's...skin? closer to a true white and this fleshy off-white color was more of a placeholder, but the longer I worked with it, the more I didn't want to change it. It actually makes sense, given that his hands are normal (as they are presented in official artwork and other fan art not made by me) and that bones usually are naturally more of an off-white color. And I also think it just looks really good next to Helena's pale skin. The hands were a special challenge in regards to both shading and coloring, as hands like to be the more complicated part of a drawing more often than not, but even that I managed to get through with a lot more ease than I would've bet on. The other thing about that is that I was surprised once I got through the steps at how much better Pepe's face looked in comparison to the rest of the drawing. As I mentioned before, it looked odd in the sketch. But one I had most of the colors for him and Helena filled in digitally, the contrast or something just made it look infinitely better. (Combined with a hefty dose of earlier back-and-forth making adjustments to his jawbone area.) Originally, I thought I might use the same cell shading for Helena's eyeshadow. However, while I was still thinking of adding some selective soft shading, I added it using one of the brushes I'd used on the mask earlier. It looked so good to me that even after I tried added the soft shading with it like I planned and decided I didn't want/need it anywhere else, I kept it. And for the record, Helena's hair is kind of the wrong texture (it's officially more straight than this) and she's missing this little netted veil thing she's supposed to have, but I had a very specific vision in mind, so those were the two creative liberties I took with her design. I say it's fair game since I took a liberty with Pepe's hat to get the Return reference in. And besides, those two details being off doesn't make her totally unrecognizable if you know who Helena is in the first place. Once they were done, I spent longer than I bothered to document playing with the leaf layer I'd made earlier to try and figure out how to get the effect I wanted. Sparing you the boring details of my trial error, as I'm sure this description will be long enough without them, I eventually determined the best thing to do was to have one layer of the leaves on top set as an "overlay" layer, and another behind/beneath Helena and Pepe. Then I went back and extended my color and shading layers to extend down over the leaves, and I arranged and clipped the layers accordingly. Technically, the overlay layer wasn't necessary, but it added a little extra dimension that I really liked. By that point, it was my second day of working digitally and getting late, but I had to do one more thing before I could go to bed with my mind at ease that night. With Helena and Pepe done, I turned the mask back on (I'd turned it off so I could focus on them without it distracting me or otherwise getting in the way) and I felt like they weren't standing out enough against it. The bright yellow color was competing too much for my eyes' attention. So, after trying the "stroke" blending option in white and that looking God-awful, I added a new layer between them and the mask and manually gave them a white outline. It wasn't a perfect solution, and I knew that even then, but it was enough that I could sleep soundly knowing how far I'd gotten with the artwork. The next day I had to take a break from working on this to bust out a painting for the challenge I decided to take on this month, but I went back to this as soon as I could after that was taken care of. When I came back to it, I acknowledged that I technically could've left it as it was and call it finished. But I still didn't like how obnoxious the mask seemed for a background piece and it felt...I don't know. Almost hollow, in a way. It was a cool graphic, sure, but I wanting something more than that. Again, I'll spare you most of the nitty-gritty details. But long story short, I played around with layer effects and filters for a while until I had blurred the mask out just enough that it wasn't so obnoxious but also so looking at it directly didn't make me nauseous, and the edges were softened so it felt more like a true background piece and not just an accessory that had been plastered carelessly back there. It was only after I started saving off versions with different backgrounds--one with no background, one with white, one with black--that I realized I was missing a golden (semi pun intended) opportunity to incorporate a Conventional Weapons reference/allusion. Which was exciting because I'd previously been disappointed that I couldn't think of a good way to do that. I went back and forth on layer styles and adding texture with brushes and things for a while on that too, but you can see what I ultimately settled on. It's not a 1:1 to the CW covers, but I'm really pleased with it anyway. I did end up adding a bit more to the white outline in a few places and adding a drop shadow to Helena and Pepe so they'd pop a bit more (it almost makes them look like paper cutouts to me!), but really the only other thing I had to do after that was add my watermark. It took roughly 3 days of work from start to finish, but I was honestly surprised by how fairly smooth the process went. Especially considering the new things I'd tried along the way. I can only assume it's because of just how much my heart was really into making this piece. As I said before, I am truly proud of how this piece turned out. I love it. I love it, and I love the band that inspired its creation. Even the title says a lot here, I think. I picked this line that's repeated at the end of It's Not a Fashion Statement, It's a Deathwish, as it was a leading inspiration with the leaves and everything, and after looking at the lyrics I realized how fitting that line is for this. I discovered My Chemical Romance two years too late, two years after they broke up in 2013, but I've stuck by them ever since, and I will continue to do so, with whatever the unwritten future holds. They've changed, as anyone would over the course of six years, but they came back anyway. Even if it's just for a few shows and they're gone again. Or if it's going to be so much more than that. They. Came. Back. And that's not an easy thing to do a lot of the time. And so, I show my solidarity. I will be with you, MCR, no matter what comes next. You were there for me, and now it's my turn to be there for you, even if it as just another fan among the crowd. And that's really all I have to say on the matter. ____ Artwork © me, MysticSparkleWings ____ Where to find me & my artwork: My Website | Commission Info + Prices | Ko-Fi | dA Print Shop | RedBubble |   Twitter | Tumblr | Instagram

[thesoftkitty42]

I’m posting original content???

Hey there friends. So, I never actually post anything on my blog, but I wrote this for my Creative Writing class and I thought that people might like it, so I’m gonna share it with y’alls. Basically we had to write a How-To article, so I wrote one about How to be Emo. It’s really long and really stupid but it’s still kind of entertaining. Here it is lol

How to Become a MySpace Ready Emo God/Goddess Overnight in 5 Easy Steps: Welcoming yourself to the Black Parade

By Grace Burns  Feb. 7, 2018

You know that feeling when you log on to the oh-so-popular website, MySpace.com and you see a super cool, badass, edgy emo queen on your feed, and then you look at your sad, boring, “normal” profile and it just looks lame in comparison? And then you start to think of how cool you would look if you attempted to take sick pictures at that same awesome angle, but when you try you just look like dumbass? Well, I’m here to teach you exactly what steps you can take to become the saddest, baddest, raddest emo of your nightmares.

1 Wardrobe is Everything

Alright, first things first. You can’t have that MySpace fame unless you look the part. You need to start off this journey with a trip to every emo’s favorite place on Earth (other than Warped Tour) Hot Topic. Hot Topic is a safe haven for our kind, housing all the band merch and aesthetically pleasing accessories that you could only dream up in your head. As you walk into the shop, notice the music they’re blasting through the speakers? If you recognize the song, dance along to the music in the store. This is an easy way to make a friend if you both happen to be rocking out to the same artist. Your first stop should be the jeans section. They’re all black skinny jeans, so you better get used to having all your leg fat squeezed into your body. But, you do have the option of whether or not you want jeans with or without rips in them. This will all depend on the aesthetic you are trying to achieve. For someone who is just transitioning to the emo lifestyle, I would suggest starting slow and steady and picking out some plain black skinny jeans without any rips in them. After you grab your bottoms, it’s time to consider the tops. Hot Topic has a cornucopia of band shirts at their disposal, so you have a lot to choose from. Again, I’d suggest starting off easy by picking a shirt from a more popular emo band, preferably something from the holy emo trinity, My Chemical Romance, Fall Out Boy, and Panic! At the Disco, and then as you continue your transition you can start branching off into other bands. The last essential part of your wardrobe is the accessories. Chokers, studded belts, and lots of piercings are all good choices. And you can always get fake piercings to try things out before you commit to piercing lots of holes in your body. The last part of your clothing look is shoes. There are a few different options here. You could go with Vans or Converse, but many debate over which shoe encompasses the emo look more effectively, so to be safe I would go with a classic pair of combat boots. You can never go wrong with combat boots.

2 Hair and Makeup

The next step in becoming the emo nightmare you’ve been dreaming up is the hair and makeup. This goes hand in hand with your clothing and helps complete the whole look. The first thing to change is your hair. If you have soft, wavy, shiny hair, that is the first to go. Your hair needs to look like it’s been beat to shit, much like you have been beaten by your emotions over the years. Do you have bangs? No? Get bangs, they help block out the haters. Is your hair black? If not, you should probably dye it. And of course you need to buy a hair straightener so you can destroy your hair even further. If you aren’t experiencing long-term hair damage, you aren’t doing it right. Now, onto the makeup. Firstly, foundation. You need to make your skin look as dead inside as you feel. Buy a foundation a shade or so lighter than you normally would, and apply to the face and set with a powder. While your pale complexion is essential, your most important tool is and always will be your eyeliner. Eyeliner is what blinds you from the world’s sorrows. It is what gets you into character. Eyeliner is the single most important part of your emo look. Here’s how to apply it:  

Grab a pencil or gel eyeliner from your local makeup store (you could even grab eyeliner from Hot Topic)

Apply along upper and lower lash line, making the lines fairly thick.

Smudge eyeliner to perfection

If you need extra tips or inspiration, look at pictures of pre-hiatus Pete Wentz, as he is the unofficial king of emo.

You could just leave your eye makeup as is, or you could take it one step further by adding eyeshadow. You could go for a dark black that matches your soul, or you could do a classic emo eyeshadow color, red. Emo God Frank Iero was famous for his red eyeshadow during My Chem’s “Revenge Era”. This era should be the inspiration for a great deal of your aesthetic. To apply the eyeshadow, all you need to do is take a fluffy eye brush, dip it in the shadow, and sweep/swirl the makeup all over your lid, almost touching the brow bone, and don’t forget to put some of the eyeshadow along your lower lash line as well. After your eye makeup is complete, add mascara to the lashes to finish it off. Lastly is deciding if you want to wear lipstick or not. Many emos choose not to wear lipstick and tend to leave the lips plain, but times are changing, and of you feel like adorning a color on your lips would complete your look, go for it! A big part of the emo mentality is expressing yourself and being who you are free of judgement. You could easily sport a sexy red or black lipstick, or if you dye your hair a fun teal color, you could pick up a matching lipstick from your local Hot Topic.

3 Music

The single most important part of becoming an emo is listening to the right music. The bands that you choose to listen to will be like a safety net. They will comfort you in times of need. The most important bands to listen to are, of course, the three bands that make up the holy emo trinity of music. Chances are you have probably heard the chart topping music created by My Chemical Romance, Fall Out Boy, and Panic! At the Disco on the radio over the years. Fans of these bands, myself included, have claimed that these artists have saved their lives with their music and their words. You must listen to all of their music like it is your religion, and slowly it will become your religion. You must obsess over these bands and their members. Gerard Way is your inspiration and reason that you are not afraid to keep on living, Patrick Stump is the small adorable man with the kindest words that make you feel better on a bad day, Brendon Urie is a talented man with lots of advice on how to deal with your problems. But, the most important thing to remember as you slowly slip into the bandom culture is that every band member is just as important as the others. Fall Out Boy is much more than Pete and Patrick, Joe Trohman and Andy Hurley are just as amazing as their fellow members. The same goes for My Chem, while Gerard and Frank are fantastic people, don’t discredit the utter beauty of Mikey and Ray because they are just as worthy of your praise. When it comes to Panic! At the Disco, even though Brendon rapidly lost all of his members and can’t seem to make anyone stay in the band anymore, don’t forget about those who have fallen from Panic!. Ryan Ross is still an inspiration, and without him we would never have gotten the sheer beauty that is Pretty. Odd. which is debatably the best album Panic! has ever produced. You will listen to this music to the point that you know every last lyric, guitar riff, and drum beat. You will constantly thank God for Esteban and reference every single song on a daily basis. The majority of the things you say are emo references that no one else understands. You will be sad when you stumble upon a phenomenal emo meme on the internet and have no one to share it with. But that’s okay, because you can always cheer yourself up by watching old band interviews and by re-watching the same music videos that you’ve seen countless times before. You will count down the release of new albums, and you will cry when bands decide to call it quits. It will be a rollercoaster of emotions that will slowly consume your life.

4 Attitude

Your attitude is important. If you’re going to try and live that emo lifestyle you crave, you need to have the right attitude. Long gone are your days of cheerful comments and a sunny-disposition. The way you present yourself is a major part of living that dark, gloomy emo life. If you go about talking about pop music, or things that the general public find enjoyable, you will never be able to pull off being emo. You need to walk about as if you are dying inside, and present yourself as a self deprecating, pessimistic,  depressing person that brings the mood down in social situations. If you are the token emo in your friend group, you have to try and convert your friends into the lifestyle. Start by getting them into newer Panic! At the Disco and Fall Out Boy songs which are more pop punk than they are traditional emo, especially compared with their earlier works. Once you butter them up with the more modern and radio playable songs, slowly start introducing them to older songs and see if they like it. If they do, you’ve got em. It’s only a short time before they too are emo with you. Along with converting your friends, you just need to talk about emo things nonstop to the point where your friends either need to convert, or they are constantly annoyed by your antics. If you go a whole day without mentioning the new Fall Out Boy album, are you really a fan? If you don’t own merch from every era of My Chemical Romance, can you even call yourself emo? You need to make sure that you have the right mentality, or you will never be able to be a true emo. Another important thing is making sure you have the right tools to protect yourself from harm. Haters are everywhere, and you can fend them off by just blowing them off, or you could spit a bunch of facts about why the emo culture is very important to you and many others.

5 Actually Becoming Emo

Last but not least, an essential step is actually becoming emo. While you might start off doing this ironically, or just to try something new, you will become trapped in the culture. By researching the bands and listening them to fit in, you will actually begin to become obsessed with them and you will really believe that they are the most wonderful people that God has ever created. The emos will trap you, there is no escaping once you start. Eventually you might buy some clothes will color in them, or some jeans that are a little baggier, and you might lighten up on the eyeliner, but anytime you hear that ear-piercing g note that opens up the song Welcome to the Black Parade, you won’t be able to control yourself and you will probably start getting emotional remembering the good old days. You might open up your closet and see that Hot Topic sweater with the safety pins in the sleeves hidden away behind your favorite top, and all you’ll be able to do is laugh at your old style, but you’ll still secretly love it. And years down the road you’ll drop your kids off at school and turn on the classic rock station. You recognize the song that’s playing, but you can’t quite place what it is, and then you hear the lyrics “Am I more than you bargained for yet?” and you will be taken back to your emo days and you’ll drive home and pull out you old albums and put them on, remembering how this music and lifestyle made you feel. You will always be just a little emo on the inside.

[yusselah]

Draw Well, Be Well

My Daughter’s Reminders

My daughter Jenny grew up falling down, with a fractured tibia here and a black eye there. Injuries stemming from a central nervous system disorder with a  hard to pronounce name: Incontinentia Pigmenti. After 32 years, the words still freeze on my tongue. 

I.P. is not a one-size-fits-all genetic disorder in the ways it affects the lives of the baby girls who are born with it. For Jenny, a woman with a girlish face and a small body, this rare neurocutaneous condition deprives her of many things: the balance to stand, walk, or enjoy the kind of grapho-motor control that enables her mother and brother, both formally trained artists, to draw with precision. 

Precision can be very appealing in the right hands. But my daughter doesn’t draw for appeal, or approval. She draws to be well; to feel well; and for her, thank goodness, the very act of picture-making has for decades now afforded her a pleasurable way of breaking past the gravity of her immense motor and cognitive challenges. The story of Jenny’s love of picture-making and the goodness she’s drawn from pictures are perhaps best illustrated in the images she paraded through my old appointment book in a furious sprint over a cold winter’s night when she was 16. As they remind me, indeed I cannot forget them, she was quite ill in body and mind following a mind-shattering fall after becoming severely sleep deprived at a special summer camp. Had the staff been trained to detect and act on the signs of her obvious sleep deprivation, she might have been spared the half year she lost while living in the painful limbo in her shattered consciousness, where unrecoverable sleep falls. She might have avoided her hallucinations, and the dreadful fear of being swallowed back into the jaws of the seizure monsters that ripped entire pages from her school calendar while she was a little girl. 

I refer to these images as my daughter’s reminders, in part because she made them in an old datebook of mine, drawing freely over pages containing handwritten reminders of my appointments and tasks to be completed. But even more so because her images like the fast-falling peanut shell and winged red horse she drew there remind me of the importance picture-making has played in our lives. They remind me how reliably Jenny Lily Gordon, now 32, has piloted herself through dark times on the tip of a pen. How she’s drawn genies back into fallen bottles. And created a hearth of warm friction when her off-kilter body ran a little too cold - as it often does when her neurological temperatures flowed in different directions. Warm on her left, frosty along her right. But “just right” — like a fairy tale porridge — when her busy left hand is working with her eyes to make a new picture.

From the moment she was able to pick up and hold onto a crayon at the age of three, which was not easy for her, drawing has given my daughter a trustworthy way to communicate when words failed her. You see, Jenny’s thoughts get stuck in the upper shelves of her fragile brain’s speech and language freezer. She finds it easier to produce certain kinds of ideas using ink and lead pigments which fly effortlessly from her drawing instruments without a lot of words weighing them down.

Making pictures offers her a profound well-spring of wellness because the activity also provides a fount of liberating physical release. For although she can’t ice-skate or play soccer, she can take great speed on the point of a No. 2 pencil. And the rhythmic sound the lead tip makes against a sheet of paper is music to her ears. “The paper is a mountain I can climb, where you and me can go up to anywhere, we can fly away,” she once told me as we drew beneath a star-studded August sky . To Jenny, the earth’s gravity can be supremely limiting while her paper universe is boundless.

Since her earliest years, our curly-headed, cognitively- and visually-impaired daughter, has been drawn to our home’s bright, white shelves. They’re packed with paper, old calendars, new and used sketchbooks, fat patches of fabric and pens and inkwells of tangy colors: raspberry, lemon, blueberry, carrot, eggplant and chocolate. She continues to reach for these colorful supplies to flavor her way over the bitter aftertaste of some pretty potent medicines.

These particular reminders of Jenny’s scratch deeply into my memories --and my wife’s -- of many of her hardest times. Times when she lost her appetite completely. Times when she couldn’t grip a spoon or hold a cup of milk; night times when repeated falls from her consciousness — sparked by uncontrollable seizures — ripped entire pages out of her school calendar. These are the kinds of drawn reminders I kept hidden in a desk drawer for years even though I cherished them as visual celebrations of Jenny’s remarkable tenacity and strong desire not to be counted out.

When the tornado side effects of her powerful anti-convulsants began to lighten, she immediately reached for her friction sticks to draw her way back to a steadier state of mind. Her pens and pencils were like a conductors’ baton with which to find the music to lift up and re-organize her disordered mind. The pictures were dance partners to her songs. Pictures went hand and hand with singing. They were dance partners that came together over many hours, across many days, until a new destination appeared. These pictures trigger my gratitude for the ancient red line of drawing - the pulsating, sanguine line which runs like the Hudson River through all of human time. Drawing has also given me a way to express gratitude everyday for a piece of chalk, for a circle, or those beautiful, swift lines that drive comic books.

But I have a special gratitude for these images she paraded across the grey pinstriped pages of my old 2007 appointment calendar. They remind me how drawing alongside her for over three decades has again and again restored our hope of finding some joy in the next five, ten or fifteen minutes. The hope that drawing provides is coming in very handy right now as we live through this vaccine-less pandemic.

It is often said that a picture is worth a thousand words, but to me these pictures are worth a thousand pictures each. An entire year can be glanced in a solitary image: like that long stretch of time when Jenny’s leg was broken in a completely preventable fall. Thank goodness her hands weren’t hurt. She could still wield magic markers, whose bright, magical colors and pungent scents helped lessen her pain.

“My leg hurts, but the itching is worse,” she told me as we drew cats’ faces over the dense, white cast that stretched from her foot all the way up her thigh. She had injured her right leg during a fall from a rowing machine in a health club. The “trainer” had not remembered to fasten the seat belt, but left Jenny’s right foot tightly fastened to the binding in machine’s pedal; when she slid unattended from the seat and struck the floor, her bound leg twisted radically, resulting in what her orthopedist reassured us was “just a skier’s fracture.” But “just” to Jenny is not really any old just. The fracture healed fine, but the surrounding anatomy never quite restored.

I’m reminded how at night her swollen limb throbbed with blue pain - and that the little balance she had before, enabling her to stand up and pivot with our support, was gone. So we carried her.

One night as we drew more icons over the rock-hard plaster, she paused to say, “Joseph, did you know I am drawing-able? I am very, very able to draw. I can draw all day. I’m never afraid. I have zero paper fright.”

“So you have no ‘stage fright’ when you draw?,” I clarified.

“Zero!” she shot back. “It never hurts to draw, it’s never scary so don’t be scared, dad, ok?”

Ever since, I have tried to take her word for it. Not fearing how a picture might be seen or judged by others is a freedom few of us carry over from childhood.

“Jenny doesn’t draw for anyone’s sake but her own, does she?” an artist friend John asked me as they sat together at a tall window overlooking a row of massive trees outside our Bronx apartment.

She had been drawing at that sill for several hours, filling the pages of an old composition book that once belonged to her brother. Old sketchbooks, spiral notebooks or other semi-used booklets of paper held a special allure because they contained the appealing marks of people whose drawings she loved.

“What are you drawing?” John asked. “The birds, the squirrels?”

The animals were busy that afternoon, flying between branches which dropped red and yellow leafs

“I’m just drawing a picture, John,” she replied. “You want to make one?”

“I once just drew lots of pictures, too, Jenny. On the farm where we all grew up. I drew between my chores and homework.”

“You weren’t scared right?”

“Not a bit,” he replied, as he grabbed a pencil.

Picture-making’s reliability in shifting one’s vantage point is helpful when you’re perpetually sitting on the edge of your next fall. For eleven years she was besieged by seizures while transitioning into and out of sleep. I am reminded of those nights by her image of the hovering “seizure monster” who, she said, was like “crocodiles biting through her pillows.” They flew off with her voice. “I couldn’t speak when they came.” Examining her picture several years later, she told me “I’m glad that bitch is gone.”

Many of our hardest falls are lurking just around the corner, yet we don’t see them even as we’re heading towards them. Like that tree branch snaking beneath the cement sidewalk, opening up a crack that swallows the wheel of your wheelchair, sending you crashing. A collision with asphalt can mark up your porcelain face with alarming exclamation points. These shout out your extreme vulnerability to your neighbors when they see you in the lobby of the 14-story, red-brick high-rise you call home. 

“The colors hurt a lot more than my face does” she once confided, referring to the attention that comes with every bloom of these dreaded color palettes. The hues of purple, crimson, curry yellow, and cloudy grey can take weeks to fade. These are times to stay clear of windows and mirrors, because the reflections really do hurt. Whenever she got slammed she reflexively turned to picture-making, selecting and blending soothing colors and picturing a reassuring and perhaps more stable landscape.

All of this is to remind me how I am deeply grateful for these particular pictures made in her fierce sprint to recover herself from the calamitous fall she took when she was 16. These are the book of pictures I hid away for years. I just couldn’t bare to look at them. They were too potent, too illustrative of that most shattering fall that I should have seen coming. I felt guilty for having placed my paternal trust in that Godforsaken sleep away camp; a sailing camp stationed in a former nunnery in picturesque Newport, Rhode Island. It was there that she fell unnoticed through her REM cycle into the depths of the most severe sleep deprivation. A clueless trio of camp nurses were simply too untrained to see what had happened to her, even though she was unable to speak, sit, eat or  recognize her own parents. “Oh, she’ll be just fine,” the smiling nurse told us, having no idea that Jenny’s severe sleep loss had disorganized her brain so profoundly that she took a year to fully recover. She lingered in that place where unrecoverable sleep falls, alone and lonely, a lost soul in a song-less, picture-less limbo. She dwelled in that nowhere space from late August through late December.

It was a hellish period during which time I soon came tumbling down my own mental hill, like Jack following Jill. Which is why these images remain such vivid reminders of that night in late December as Jenny’s recovery began to take shape in this remarkable parade of pictures, which sprouted fruits, and birds, and rivers, and strange bits of self-portraiture, like that disembodied head rolling down August.

They are still dancing in my old datebook with the red ribbon place mark. Her quickly drawn bright plumes of birds feathers and her fast-falling orange peanut shell all poured forth one winter’s night and morning four months after her August fall. They flowed swiftly when just a few hours before she could barely lift a pencil. After so many painful days of passivity, depression, and sleep disturbed nights, they took form through her tired fingers onto the grey pinstriped pages of my old Lettes of London appointment book. And as she drew I knew as only a parent can know that our daughter was surely on her way back to her steadier self again.

I saw the sparkle return to her wan, brown eyes; and the red rouge come back to her pale cheeks. Should I ever forget what drawing can do for a human being  I will look at these pictures once again. 

When she first reached for the place-mark of that old appointment book, I was annoyed with her lingering illness and with myself for having held onto all these dozens of outdated appointment books - paper objects that had left me bound to the past, and clinging hopelessly to the idea that if I could just plan my days carefully enough that I might not be so fearful of the future. I had gritted my teeth as I began tossing the red- and black-covered journals into the trash. But when the red ribbon danced from the Lettes’ binding it lit Jenny up like a fuse. “Please give it to me, I want to draw in it,” she said as I handed the book over and helped her gather up her markers. 

She quickly began charting her way across the meridian of reminders cluttered with notes of my old appointments. Several hours later, she was still going strong, but I insisted that she stop and try to get some sleep. As sound sleep cycle was still eluding us. She nonetheless awoke early the next morning to continue drawing. 

“Look at all of these wonderful pictures you made. You draw so well,” I said as she moved her friction sticks swiftly over the pin-striped pages like a wind-filled sailboat cutting across Naragansett Bay.

“Well, dad, you know,” she replied, “Draw well, be well.”  She lifted her head to survey the colors of her many pens that lay before her, picked out several reds and oranges, and drew on fearlessly for hours. 

- Joe Gordon

[rhondanicole]

Color U Peach & Black: Prince’s ‘Sign O’ the Times’ Turns 30 (Part 2, Disc 2)

Prince’s critically-acclaimed Sign O’ the Times first graced our eardrums on March 31, 1987, and has been rocking us thusly ever since. The album’s first disc (or, if you’re truly ol’ skool, sides one and two of the first record) starts off with one of Prince’s most politically jarring tunes of the decade (possibly beating out Dirty Mind’s anti-war anthem “Party Up” and Controversy’s Cold War post-punk gem, “Ronnie Talk 2 Russia”) and closes with perhaps one of his most openly vulnerable love songs to date. It’s only right--and Princely--for the second disc to kick into high gear with an ode to the beautiful ones, “U Got the Look.”

Disc Two

With a vocal assist from ‘80s pop phenom Sheena Easton (who had earned herself quite a following earlier in the decade with gorgeous tunes like “Morning Train,” “For Your Eyes Only,” and “Almost Over You;” and whose good girl image got a purple makeover when Prince [as Alexander Nevermind] penned the salaciously marvelous and controversial “Sugar Walls” for her 1984 release, A Private Heaven), Camille makes another appearance sharing leads on this Billboard Hot 100 chart-topper. Taking us through the splendid story of boy meeting girl in “the World Series of love,” “U Got the Look” finds our darling Prince/Camille being awakened by a pretty thing as she walks in, and the chase ensues. (Was he asleep in the club though?) Crucial.

As the ugly lights click on and Prince and his object of affection fade into the next track, Camille sticks around for the album’s second single, “If I Was Your Girlfriend.” As Camille pleads to be loved with the kind of intimacy women often reserve for and share with their closest girlfriends, the song’s slinky, hypnotic groove more than hints at its lyrical preoccupation with gender fluidity and traditional, heteronormative roles. R&B trio TLC released a well-received version of the song on their multi-platinum album, 1994′s Crazy Sexy Cool, but for many a die hard Prince fan the song didn’t quite work precisely because the whole point of it was how the male/masculine narrative questioned long-held notions and concepts of gender and identity. 

Track three on disc two, “Strange Relationship,” was originally recorded in the early ‘80s and initially intended for the ambitious but ultimately shelved Dream Factory album. A Wendy and Lisa-produced Middle Eastern-inspired iteration of the song, complete with sitar and finger cymbals, made it onto Dream Factory and can certainly be found in die hard fans’ collections, but the final version for SOTT falls comfortably into the funk/soul vibe of the album. “Strange Relationship” is the aural poster child for dysfunctional partnerships everywhere: “Baby, I just can’t stand 2 see u happy/more than that, I hate 2 see u sad/honey if u left me I just might do something rash...” Had it been released for the first time in 2017, the song surely would’ve triggered a rash of think pieces. #HurtBae

“I Could Never Take the Place of Your Man” is a slice of delicious pop rock, also originally recorded in the early ‘80s and re-worked for SOTT. In the song, Prince spins a yarn about a lovelorn woman whose raggedy ass man “left her with a baby and another one on the way,” and who is looking for a new man and wonders if he may be up to the task. Prince assures her that, while he “may be qualified for a one-night stand,” he could really never fill the space left by the one who got away. Prince admits he feels for the woman, but guarantees she wouldn’t be satisfied with the kind of hit and run situation that would probably come of their coupling.

As with any Prince album, where there is sex, there is God. For SOTT, the spiritual pivot happens towards the end of the second set, with “The Cross.” A simple melody that finds Prince crooning, “don’t die without knowing the cross,” the song’s somber acoustic instrumentation carries throughout as he tells of “ghettos 2 the left of us, flowers 2 the right” and a “sweet song of salvation a pregnant mother sings,” and promises “there’ll be bread for all of us if we can just bear the cross.” The tune climaxes as crescendoes with a gritty electric guitar pick up, classic rock drums, and a chorus of Prince’s stacked vocals before it falls softly once again at its end. In later years, once he got free and changed his name to an unpronounceable symbol, he’d substitute “The Christ” for the original lyric when performing the song live, serving notice to the audience that he no longer had to hide his faith behind clever word play. 

By far the most kinetic song on the album, “It’s Gonna Be a Beautiful Night” was recorded live at Le Zénith in Paris with the original and expanded Revolution during the Parade tour, and overdubbed later for an even fuller sound. As Prince leads “6,000 wonderful Parisians” in the familiar “ow wee oh/ohhhh” chant while Eric Leeds and Atlanta Bliss kick off the song with the now-iconic opening horn riff (which Leeds, who composed and arranged the horn line, brilliantly transferred to a t-shirt not long after Prince’s death last year), you feel the excitement rushing through the crowd all those years ago. Sheila E.’s infamous “trans-Mississippi rap” and one of the greatest band brags of all time, Prince singing “can’t nobody fuck with us,” round out the nearly 10-minute work out.

Closing out disc 2 and the Sign O’ the Times experience is “Adore,” a sensual ballad that anyone coming of age and/or grown in the late 1980s most definitely included on their slow jams mixtape (which, of course, was an actual cassette tape). Although never released as an official single from the album, the song made its way to urban A/C Quiet Storm radio programs across the country and stands as one of Prince’s finest love songs. A perfect complement to disc one’s “Forever in My Life,” “Adore” seals the deal, promising that “until the end of time, I’ll be there 4 u.” Assuring his beloved that the angels “know u r my fix” and that he “ain’t fuckin’ just for kicks,” the song finds Prince putting in some serious work on the organ. Buoyed by stunning vocal arrangements, Eric Leeds’ sublime sax, and lyrics that simply melt one’s heart, “Adore” may reign as the star of the entire show. And in the wake of Prince’s untimely passing, the words “4 all time I am with u, u r with me” seem to take on new meaning.

Dream Factory, Camille, Crystal Ball

One of the more curious pieces of trivia surrounding the album that would become Sign O’ the Times are the albums that never came to be, but whose songs make up a significant portion of SOTT’s track listing. “The Ballad of Dorothy Parker,” “Strange Relationship,” “I Could Never Take the Place of Your Man,” “Starfish and Coffee,” “Slow Love,” “Sign o’ the Times,” and “The Cross” were all originally intended for Dream Factory; the album would have been the first time Prince involved all of The Revolution members in the writing and composing process. 

The Camille album, which was to be released under the pseudonym, is said to have been pieced together not long after Prince disbanded The Revolution. Still, the album would have potentially included songs from Dream Factory that eventually wound up on SOTT. 

Crystal Ball was the original name for SOTT, and began as a three-album release that was eventually slimmed down to the two-album/two-disc set that became Sign O’ the Times. That, of course, was not the end of Crystal Ball, however. In 1998, just a little over a year after the 3-disc Emancipation release, The Artist gifted fans with a 5-disk compilation set entitled Crystal Ball whose first 3 discs contained the title track (initially meant for Dream Factory), “Dream Factory,” and a slew of previously unreleased tracks from Dream Factory (”Movie Star,” “Last Heart”) and Camille (”Good Love”); remixes and alternate versions of songs from Come (”So Dark”), tracks that didn’t make the final cut of The Gold Experience (”Rippopgodazippa,” “Acknowledge Me”), and numerous other non-album singles recorded between the mid-1980s and late ‘90s; and “Crucial,” which was intended for SOTT but swapped for “Adore.” The set’s remaining discs were the all-acoustic The Truth and the NPG Orchestra’s Kamasutra, which was billed as a ballet written for Mayte.

--Rhonda Nicole

[jrkolinsky]

I’ve said this before, and I’ll say it again: the first Sunday in November is the single greatest day of the year in New York City.  Period.

Marathon Week begins the prior Sunday, with the annual Poland Spring 5 miler held in Central Park.  This is followed up with a week’s worth of events for kids, spectators and runners alike.  Then the Expo opens up at the Javits Center the Thursday before the race…and there is no larger marathon expo in the world than the huge running party through on the west side of Manhattan over a four-day span.  50,000 runners swing by to pick up their bibs and swag.

The Friday before race day, the Parade of Nations is held along the west side drive near Tavern on the Green.  Over 100 nations are represented in the awesome 5 borough black party, and the festivities are capped off with a pretty impressive fireworks display at the finish line.  Once this parade is over, the New York Road Runners host their annual Night of Champions…and the guest list reads like a who’s who of runner.  From last year’s new York City Marathon winners, to Bill Rodgers, Shalane Flanagan, the one and only Meb, and a whole host of other running elites – they all show up to help raise money for the New York Road Runners kids running programs.  I was lucky enough to score a ticket to this shindig, and it did not disappoint.

Saturday morning, the annual Dash to the Finish is held, where runners can start a 5k in front of the United Nations, held down 42nd Street to 6th Avenue, hang a right and head north to Central Park, where the race finishes across the marathon finish line.

Sunday morning begins rather early, as some of the runners’ transportation from Manhattan to the runners village in Staten Island begins at 5am.  So runners are up and out early, knowing that the first wave of the race goes off 4+ hours later.  (A quick note to anyone thinking about running this race: the city of New York is basically shutting down for this 26.2 mile block party.  So yes – you are asked to get up really early to start your trek to Staten Island. And yes – once you get to Staten Island there will be a rather vigorous security check before you are let in.  And yes-  once you are in, you’ll have to hunker down and wait a while before you get to run.  And yes – it’s windy and usually cold in the village as you wait.  So please – accept these things as part of the overall experience, because the juice is worth the squeeze.)

Race morning was a bit chilly and damp.  I was worried about the rain, as I never really had to run this race while having to deal with more than the two usual elements: wind and cold.  Those two are not a surprise – each year I show up to the starting line a bit more prepared for those challenges.  Rain, on the other hand, would make this race a bit more challenging for me.  I was running with Team for Kids, so the charity tent came in handy!

I started with Wave 4, at around 10:55am.  The first mile is a 200 climb up the Varrazanno Bridge, and runners usually get to view the Manhattan skyline very clearly here.  This morning, however, the fog kept that view from us.  The first mile should be run easily and under complete control, as runners need to deal with the exposure to a pretty strong, cold cross-wind as they head to Brooklyn.  However, I watched as runners around me took off like jackrabbits.  As the saying goes: “Let the Kenyans go….we’ll meet again at mile 18….”.

Mile 2 rewards you for the climb with a nice downhill into Brooklyn.  (A quick note hear: run in the middle lanes of the bridge, if you start on its lower deck.  If you don’t know why, I’ve leave you a hint….it has something to do with full bladders and a lack of port-o-crappers on the span of the bridge, along with 35,000 runners directly above you…..I’ll wait for that to sink in a bit…….ok – you got it?  Good.  Moving on…)  By mile 3, runners are thrown on to 4th Avenue in Brooklyn.  Here is where the party starts.  Even with the mist / drizzle coming down, people came out to scream their lungs out.  Miles 3 through 13 are amazing.  These miles are some of my favorites on he course, because it is a perfect display of what makes this city so damn awesome:  every race, color and creed together, screaming as one for 50,000 strangers of all ability levels from over 100 countries.  At one point, I just had to stop for a moment to soak in the general splendor before waddling on.

Greenpoint is the last neighborhood in Brooklyn before crossing the half way point and entering into Queens.  Queens has a few loud spots – but it’s mostly subdued from miles 13.1 to 14.5.  Then the noise picks up, as if the fans were trying to help you step on the gas to get over the 59th Street Bridge (otherwise known in my home as Mt. Sonofabitch).

The 59th Street Bridge rears its annoying head near mile 15.  This is a tough climb, and it takes a lot out of the runners.  I’ve seen the upward climb here turn into something resembling a zombie movie over the years.  if you are running this race, train with this hill in mind – don’t let it beat you.  If you aren’t prepared for it, it will kick you square in the teeth and set you up for a rough last 10 miles.

As you come down the span of the Bridge, you make the signature turn of the race: a 270 degree left hand turn that throws you onto First Avenue.  The party rolls on here – loudly – for the next couple of miles.  The noise bounces off the buildings and turns the course into a corridor of sound.  It’s one of those spans of the course where you are given a jolt of energy.  However, if you are running this race, do NOT let the fans motivate you to kick up your pace and release your inner Alberto Salazar. You still have work to do.  Stay under control and just enjoy the experience as you work your way north to The Bronx (the only borough of the city so darn awesome that it’s very name contains a “The” in front of it).

Runners cross over into The Bronx via the Willis Avenue Bridge.  The Bronx has a few small twists and turns, but they bring the noise when you enter my hometown.  With the noise comes the attitude that makes this borough so special.  For instance: The DJ playing music right near the mile 20 marker will call you out if he sees you struggling a bit.  “…I see you, number 45867….in that red shirt… YOU GOT THIS!  NOW LETS CRANK THIS UUUUUUPPPP!!!!!!” He would say versions of this over..and over…again.  And trust me: I watched as that runner in that red shirt went from walking to jogging.  Grab some water at the water stop just past Mile 20, and you’ll be greeted with messages like “man, you’ve got this.  Kick this race’s ass.” Wall?  What Wall.  There may be a Wall on this course, but fans in The Bronx want you to knock that thing down.  I left The Bronx feeling better than when I arrived.

When runners leave The Bronx, they cross the mile 22 marker and enter into Harlem.  This section of the course is my absolute favorite.  They take the attitude that just embraced you in The Bronx, and they turn that up another 3 notches.  Runners have just four miles.  Harlem’s fans do not let you forget why you are here.  Time to go to work and get this job done.  The crowds, at points, push onto the course and basically will you around Marcus Garvey Park.  One highlight: the gospel choir.  THAT is an emotional part of the course, and it helps crank you up a bit.  Once the runners hit mile 22.5, a long steady climb begins up 5th Avenue to Engineer’s Gate: the entrance into Central Park.  Rain or shine, cold or windy, the enthusiastic fans come out in droves from here to the finish line.

Rolling hills bring you from the entrance into Central Park to the right hand turn that carries the runners onto Central park South.  Another brief incline at Mile 25.3 gets you to Columbus Circle.  Here, runners re-enter Central Park and head up the west side drive to the finish.  One last hill at mile 26.1 to conquer before you earn your medal.

The rain made this race a bit more difficult, because my gear (including my shoes and socks) were soaked about half way  through the effort.  I could feel the blisters starting by the time I entered The Bronx, which resulted in a slight change in my stride.  That may not sound like a big deal, but a change in the way you run due to discomfort midway through a marathon makes the rest of the race much more challenging, and the added distraction messes with your head a bit.

I elected to receive a runner’s poncho instead of checking a bag this year – and this allowed me to exit the park and head home much quicker.  I think I’ll elect not to check a bag every year from now on.

This was my 12th New York City Marathon in a row.  I haven’t missed one since 2005 (knock on wood).  Each year, the course is the same.  The hills are in the exact same places.  The wind is still there to smack you in the face at the start.  The pain still shows up.  At mile 15 I always zone out as I climb Mt. Sonofabitch.  When it’s all over, I’m sore everywhere.  All of these things occur annually, and they aren’t so warm & fuzzy.  But you know what else hasn’t changed?  The fans.  New Yorkers spill out onto the streets, rain or shine, every year to the tune of 1-2 million just to yell for shlubs like me.  Brooklyn is still….Brooklyn (and that’s a compliment).  First Avenue is still loud.  The Bronx gets better every single year.  Harlem is still marathon holy ground to me.  Spilling into the park is still glorious.  The final 3/10 of a mile is still the greatest 3/10’s of a mile in the sport of running.  And there is always that moment of two after the medal is hung around your neck where you stop and look around at the people that you ran alongside – complete strangers hours ago, now all carrying that glow that comes from not giving up, embracing the suck, seeing a goal through…and standing in the park, quiet and victorious.

    Thoughts on the 2017 TCS New York City Marathon I've said this before, and I'll say it again: the first Sunday in November is the single greatest day of the year in New York City.