#when i literally was like ok tshirt jeans jacket shoes out the door
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nobody talks about the trans experience of becoming irrationally angry at anyone who so much as looks at you (not a moral crime) and feeling extremely violent
#shoutout to the guy from class who very obviously keeps looking at me while i refuse to so much as glance at him#he didnt do anything wrong but his days are still numbered#yea i dont know most people get sad that they have to exist in public and be viewed by others but i have some kind of chemical imbalance#it probably also doesnt help that i have put more effort intoi my appearance since high school#when i literally was like ok tshirt jeans jacket shoes out the door#and almost purposefully looked unappealing so i wouldnt have to deal with other people saying clown shit to me#but now unfortunately i care about style so i live a cursed existence where people feel the need to 'talk to me' and 'ask me if i like them'#specifically straight men. that is the problem here that it is straight men expressing interest in me#like ok its a free world and theres nothing wrong with that but it still sends me into fucking joker mode
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