#when I think about 18/19 year old leafy I just wanna hug them so hard and tell them that it’s okay and that u don’t have to try so hard

[pureleafy]

In regards to my last few asks bc I’ve been thinking abt it all for days

Akiangel brought me out of a 3 year hiatus. I was a teen when I first started writing fics and posting them and I had no idea what my style was. I was hardly an adult lol. I was in love with the writers I followed on tumblr and just tried soooo hard to be like them. Straight up head over heels for some of the writers out there. And it was so hard putting myself out there and receiving praise and hate and everything in between. I wasn’t tough enough to deal with all of that, so I backed out. Lost friends, lost interests, and didn’t feel like myself.

And it’s sad to think about younger me like that, always doubting myself and trying sooo hard to be liked. (Okay I still really want to be liked lmfao) but it’s different now. Social media still scares the hell out of me, esp with the young TikTok generation lolol y’all are terrifying 😫 but at the same time, I’m older now, I’m an adult, and it feels freeing to finally have that “fuck it, I can do what I want” attitude.

I’ll say I miss having a community. It feels lonely out here most days. But when the love pours in, it really really does. And it makes everything feel worth it. Idk what I’m saying. I’m not gonna pretend to be savvy with my words anymore. I’m just a writer and I’m humbled to the fucking core that people read my shit. That’s really it, honestly. So thanks for sticking around and watching me grow up and shit. I’m sure I’ll keep changing and I’ll look back and hug my younger self just like I am right now 💛

[mangomybeloved]

i was tagged by @cryptidhoney, thank you sweetheart!! i love seeing you on my dash btw and just your whole blog is so pretty!! 

i tag @spider--lilies, @that-lovely-hippo, @aristocrowcy, @qyutie, @10-dutchies-12-bicycles, @saentiel, and anyone else who wants to! 

1. last drink: chocolate milk

2. last phone call: calling my mom after school

3. last text message: it was to someone in my class about hw

4. last song you listened to: tik tok by kesha

5. time you cried: i mean it was definitely recently, but i can’t remember when, i think it was this monday??

6. dated someone twice?: no!

7. kissed someone and regretted it?: nope

8. been cheated on?: nope

9. lost someone special?: i’m not sure if this means by death or like over time, so i guess yeah

10. been depressed?: yeah!

11. gotten drunk and thrown up?: nope!

fave colors

12. pINK!!! i love pink alot!!! 

13. purple!!

14. light green, like leafy color!!

in the last year have you…

15. made new friends?: yeah and i love them to bits!!

16. fallen out of love?: sort of?? it was like an old crush but i never really “loved” them

17. laughed until you cried?: i think yeah?

18. found out someone was talking about you?: nope!

19. met someone who changed you?: yeah!!

20. found out who your friends are?: yeah!

21. kissed someone on your facebook friends list?: i dont have a facebook so *shrugs*

general:

22. how many of your facebook friends do you know irl?: no facebook again!

23. do you have any pets?: two birds!! they’re parakeets and are adorable and i love them!! 

24. do you want to change your name?: maybe my middle name but otherwise nope!

25. what did you do for your last birthday?: it was a school day so weeps

26. what time did you wake up today?: 7 am!

27. what were you doing at midnight last night?: staying up late on my phone 

28. what is something you cant wait for?: probably for school to be over!!

30. what are you listening to right now?: wasn’t this already a question?? 

31. have you ever talked to a person named tom?: does talking tom count fjhdsfkjha

32. something thats getting on your nerves?: how nostalgic i’ve been for the past few days, like no brain it’s in the past, get over it!!!

33. most visited website: this hellsite!!

34. hair color: black!!

35. long or short hair: long! 

36. do you have a crush on someone: sadly no :(

37. what do you like about yourself: my eyes!! also i try to be open to everyone 

38. want any piercings?: i want more ear piercings!! 

39. blood type: why do you need to know hmm?? 

40. nicknames: bubbles, lunie, and i can’t think of any others

41. relationship status: single

42. zodiac: leo

43. pronouns: she/her

44. fave tv shows: one day at a time, star vs the forces of evil, brooklyn 99

45. tattoos: none!!

46. right or left handed: right

47. ever had surgery: yeah!!

48. piercings: my ears!

49. sport: none!!

50. vacation: ?? does this mean where i want to go on vacation or like what i’m doing? well i wanna travel to europe and around the world, but the reality is i’ll probably just be staying at home 

51. trainers: is this my shoes? i wear flats mostly

more general:

52. eating: nutella sandwich

53. drinking: water!

54. im about to watch: i gotta catch up on black lightning!!

55. waiting for: the week to be over

56. want: to feel content with who i am

57. get married: 50/50, it depends

58. career: im thinking counselor but im not too sure

which is better:

59. hugs or kisses: both!! both are good!!

60. lips or eyes: eyes!

61. shorter or taller: taller

62. older or younger: i mean age doesn’t matter much to me, as long as it’s not a big difference?

63. nice arms or stomach: arms!

64. hookup or relationship: relationship

65. troublemaker or hesitant: hesitant!!

have you ever:

66. kissed a stranger: nope!

67. drank hard liquor: nope!

68. lost glasses: i’ve lost contacts before if that counts?

69. turned someone down: yeah

70. sex on first date: nope!!

71. broken someones heart: i don’t know and i hope not!!

72. had your heart broken: kind of?? 

73. been arrested: no!

74. cried when someone died: yeah!!

75. fallen for a friend: yeah!!

 do you believe in 

76. yourself: i’m trying my bestest to!

77. miracles: yeah!!

78. love at first sight: not really

79. santa claus: nope!

80. kiss on a first date: it depends on the person

81. angels: yeah!!

other:

82. best friend’s name: i have multiple best friends and i love them all with my heart!! i know that’s not answering the question, but like i don’t wanna say just one and hurt someone’s feelings

83. eye colour: dark brown!!

84. fave movie: the princess and the frog, howl’s moving castle, and there’s more but i can’t think of anymore!

85. fave actor: park bo gum, and sebastian stan!!