#whatever -_- trying not to let it ruin my mood but blergh
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My dad told me to stop being so sensitive again -_- that's literally the second time in like three days I do NOT know why he even cares neither comment was even directed to him
#k talks#weight mention in these tags I guess->#my oldest sister made some joke like ooh I eat the most fast food but I'm still the skinniest sibling#and I was like. can you not say stuff like that around me? and my dad was like stop being sensitive#and I had to be like. well. this is The Thing I have issues about actually! I am sensitive about it true! because it's sorta triggering 2 m#which first of all. having to bring that up to even be taken seriously is kind of humiliating.#and second of all he KNOWS this we had this same conversation a year ago. even my twin was like yeah K's said before they don't like this#I don't know. I feel like it's reasonable to ask things of my family who loves me and wants to not hurt me. with The Issues#whatever -_- trying not to let it ruin my mood but blergh
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Think twice before you touch my girl 14 Oct 2003|09:57pm
[mood | annoyed] [music: Eve6 - Think Twice]
After watching tonight's episode of Gilmore Girls I found myself viciously holding back tears. It is just a TV show... why do I have so many bubbling emotions over a TV show? Only that show and Everwood are tearjerkers for me. I'll never understand. Never. Upsets me. A lot. Obviously. Maybe the lives they live are lives I wish I could experience? But my life is already drama filled. Except... the people in those shows always confront their fears, enemies, loves, and so forth. I'm too stubborn to do anything. The girl that tends to hate me the most passed by me going down the stairs today singing in an alto voice at me "I haa-aa-a-te yo-ooo--ooo-u". Now if that isn't something to put a damper your spirits I don't know what is. See my thing is, if I could understand her hatred, I'd be fine. I wouldn't give a diseased rat's ass about her. I might even throw her a friggin' bone. Props. Whatever. But no, I don't get it. How could someone hate someone they’ve never talked to so much? How?! Why did God give so much negativity to a person? Did her parents not love her enough? Was she abused by people growing up? What was it? How is she different than me? I let her do this over and over again and I can’t even stand up for myself. What else has been eating away at every crevice in my soul? Oh what? Hmm... I DON'T KNOW! I'm just in one of those moods where I want to give a speech. Hmm... I'd it too if my mom wasn't sitting in the next room watching "Good Morning, Miami", and my dad behind me chatting up a storm with someone on the phone. I feel like I need to be depressed to be accepted. If I'm happy I'm airheadish. If I'm melancholy then I'm pensive, intellectual, and articulate. If I'm depressed I relate better. And I give long speeches. I hope I'm in a better mood by the time Wren calls me tonight. I don't want to ruin our phone conversation by being all BLERGH. He's always so happy. I don't understand it. And if he isn't happy, then he's still-- oh what's the phrase? Well to put it simply: he never shows his exact mood. He doesn't put his heart out on his sleeve. I hate doubting his mood and emotions... doubting as in not being so sure of his exact feeling. Mother was trying to read this... curse her. I sound insane... I am insane but that's another story/bottle of vodka/session with the shrink. *sigh* I'm going to halt this entry here. I feel uninspired all of a sudden.
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