#whatcolorismyaura

[iamoppo]

Sure… I’ll take it. 
ig: @iamoppo

[echodrops]

Ten Totally Awesome, Very Serious, Incredibly Valid Reasons to Ship Shigaraki/Ochako

Pleaseee Note: This is a parody post. If you’re looking for real reasons to ship Shigako (M&Ms voice: they do exist!), they’re over here.

Spoilers for My Villain Academia, watch out.

Uh, also, before anyone goes stereotypically tumblr on me, no, I obviously do not condone shipping minors and adults. But I do fully support future fics, age changes, and AUs because I can actually conceptualize of fictional characters in circumstances different from the canon. First person to send me anon hate about a four-year age gap will be punted into the sun.  

1) Uraraka already has a track record of being attracted to a Merch-Collecting Nerd Prince with Zero Chill and only One Pair of Red Sneakers to his name.

It’s only inevitable that one day she’ll come to her senses and upgrade to the VASTLY SUPERIOR Nerd King Special Edition HD Re-Release™ instead.

Thank you to Reddit for providing me multiple pictures comparing these vile shoes.

2) Shigaraki might be a crazed terrorist hell bent on total world destruction, but he’s not interested in kinky girls.

Freak in the streets, vanilla in the sheets.

A PERFECTLY NORMAL girl like Ocha–

You know what, on second thought, let’s just… move along…

3) He’s got blue hair, she likes to wear pink. He was a skater boi, she said see yah later boi.

According to The Complete Colorstrologist’s Guide to Metaphysical, Metaphoric, and Metastasizing Personal Wells of Well-Being (publication pending); the expert opinions of at least three licensed metaphysicotheologico-cosmolonigologists; whatcolorismyaura .com (which is flagged as a security risk by my browser, and which I was too scared to actually unflag, even for the sake of this joke); like half of a $1.50/hour consultation with the professionals of 1-800-PSY-CHIC (which I hope is not a real phone number); and five whole minutes of Googling, pink and blue are infinitely compatible colors! The intensity and compassion of those possessing the pink aura helps to temper the brutal intuition and blunt honesty of the blue aura! The reliability and follow-through of one pastel soul empowers the bubbly generosity of the other! This is just plain and simple scientifically proven fact. Does your ship align with the stars?! I didn’t think so.

FURTHERMORE, deciphering the Illuminati’s cryptographic RGB code reveals that the-only-color-of-pink-anime-girls-are-allowed-to-wear corresponds perfectly to Numerology Life Path Number 7, while baby blue corresponds to Life Path 2, which, like, basically totally means they’re soulmates.*

* Every sign is your soulmate if you go through enough of the Google results.

Please also consider: Cotton candy is delicious.

I stole this picture from a vape shop. Please don’t sue me, vape shop.

4) Shigaraki and Uraraka would obviously be the ultimate low maintenance power couple.

They say that the most harmonious pairs are people who live similar lifestyles, right? Get you a man who won’t judge your habit of window-shopping at convenience stores.

Think of all the ridiculous AU fanfics the world is tragically missing out on!

Where is the penniless millennial disaster roommate AU?! (Can’t afford real food? Mochi makes the dream work. Their roof springs a leak? F R E E shower. Coupon game too strong. God help the person who cuts them in line for samples at the grocer’s.) Where is the “We got fake married for the tax breaks” AU?! (”Wait, what do you mean divorces cost money?”) The “Don’t think I’ll take it easy on you in battle just because we keep meeting at the 99¢ ¥100 store” AU?! The--

5) Who doesn’t love a beauty and the beast story? A tale as old as time? Song as old as rhyme?

I, for one, have perfect faith in the ability of Shigaraki’s beauty to civilize even the most horrendous of monsters.

6) Look Uraraka–

–you might have to bail his ass out of jail for murder, but at least you know you’ll never catch him cheating!

6.5) Their ship name could be Stardust. 🌠S T A R🌠🌌D U S T🌌!!! Why are y’all still sleepin’?!! Arghhkfghjfgh!

7) She’s already met his whole family!

The introduction got off on an awkward foot, trueee, but look on the bright side: there definitely won’t be any complaints about their relationship from his side of the aisle!

8) Her quirk makes her nauseous? That’s okay. He’s A L W A Y S nauseous.

It doesn’t get any more romantic than taking turns holding each other’s hair, and research suggests people who have maximum innate chemistry mirror each other’s physical behaviors without even noticing! You could say they just can’t hold it in anymore! It’s really overflowing! In this essay, I will-- 

9) The couple that plays together, stays together. 

This is where I WOULD put a picture of Shigaraki gaming... if Horikoshi had ever drawn one, but he WON’T, because he knows full well that Shigaraki is a fake gamer who only ever watches Let’s Plays.

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single male in possession of a decent PC build, must be in a want of a hot gamer girlfriend. Semi-mythical in nature, it is rumored that once every nine years, when Mars aligns with the release of a new triple AAA title that has single player and no micro-transactions, a female gamer will reveal herself via dropping push-to-talk in the voice chat and will accept challengers of note. Should you best her in battle, the ancient legend claims, she may deem you a worthy companion. But lose, and your dignity fate will lie entirely in her hands.

Ochako is crazy competitive. Shigaraki’s ass is grass.

10) You ever see him act like this much of a doofus for anyone but Uraraka Ochako?

I rest my case.

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