#what’s the end of the year without an unhinged drunk rant I’ve not had one this year I’m allowed one

[facetsofthecloset]

Angry tipsy rant about some random Japanese travel cooking show I saw a bit of on tv just now below the cut don’t mind me

ちょっとーフランスのロケに行って片言の英語しか話さないのってどういうこと？？？そりゃ取材断れるは！地元の言語勉強しろアホ

I mean of ALL the countries that would find that kind of offensive FRANCE is definitely number one! They hate English and plenty still don’t like Asians either! Why the f u c k would you not at least learn to say bonjour/oui/non AT LEAST

That would make SUCH a difference in how they treat you! OF COURSE they chased you off from filming there you didn’t even have enough respect to learn the phrase “I’m from [whatever Japanese tv show it was idc], may we film here?” in French!! “Oh wah my language skills are so bad 🥲” cry me a fucking river YOU DIDN’T EVEN TRY

God it speaks to such entitlement and ignorance this is why Japanese tourists have bad reputations your old imperialism is showing bitch

I’m a little tipsy so madder than I maybe should be but FUCK it pisses me off how many Japanese people say they want to travel internationally and do NO research and think “oh if I use English it’ll work everywhere right it’s fine even if it’s bad foreigners will put in the work to understand me because I’m trying :)” AND THEN GO TO A NON-NATIVELY ENGLISH COUNTRY

Like fucking head empty, colonialism what’s that??? 😲

This is what I mean when I say there’s overlap between white American entitlement and national Japanese entitlement like scrub the history all you fucking want but Japan did still have a BIGGGG imperialist phase and the tendrils of that era still extend deep into the modern day

But noooo that’s all in the past~! Japan is so small and cute and innocent now uwu ⭐️anime⭐️ and they never fucking think about how despite official policy not being isolationist the general cultural attitude is still VERY much “oh you guys are so silly, don’t mind us we’re just doing our thing over here, I mean we don’t even have an army or anything so you guys go ahead and punch each other while we stay over here as if we’re completely innocent of any of this”

But of course it’s not on purpose, people just don’t think about this stuff! “Oh you Americans are always going off about politics, you have so many problems in your country I feel so bad for you! Me? No I’ve never voted in my life, I’m not some kind of radical politician! Yes of course democracy is a good thing what do you mean I’m supposed to participate”

Shut the fuck up this is why gay marriage is STILL ILLEGAL here among MANY OTHER PROBLEMS ちょっとぐらい責任取れボケカス💢

Whoof I really shouldn’t watch TV when drinking but anyway if you’re gonna film a show internationally you should be contractually required to at least read the Wikipedia article of that country and some basic, basic phrases in the ACTUAL native language, especially if you’re the host and face of the episode like GOD IT’S SO EMBARRASSING

I super lucked out when I went to France because I ran into some random old ladies who were kinda weebie and liked me specifically because I was Japanese BUT ALSO they really appreciated that I used baaaaaasic French greetings, just the usual bonjour/merci etc like just TRY?? Not trying is just…so insulting??? How dare you go to their house and just—urghhhhhhhhh

Just the fact that it’s France too, it is SOOOOO EASYYYYY to find basic French lessons!!! Especially since duolingo alienated its original western audience and is putting hella ad money in Japan now! French!! Like almost every Japanese person’s top 5 in languages they want to learn other than English! (Admittedly usually for a slightly older generation, like my mom’s age, but still) Gah there was not an OUNCE of care put into this it’s the definition of “content” I haaaaaate it 😭😭😭

[ovyy-pvcure]

More of that Heathers AU no one asked for: Veronica is both Nanashi and Hallelujah, Asahi is still Martha(though only for Nana), Kurt and Ram are Navarre and Gaston (sorry guys) Dagda is JD, Flynn is Mrs Flemming, Toki is still Heather McNamara, Krishna is Heather Chandler, and as Heather Duke introduc- SHUT UP HEATHER. sorry, heather. 

Beautiful is an unwitting duet between the two Veronicas in parallel walks through the school (H: dream of ivy-covered walls and smokey french cafes~ N: fight the urge to light a match and set this dump ablaze~!) Fight for me interrupts halfway through as Hallelujah witnesses Nanashi fighting for Asahi following Gaston being a dick to Asahi (Hey Mr-no-name kid? Too literal?). Obviously, it reappears darker and more aggressive later re: Nanashi and Dagda (Fight With Me). Hallelujah is the one who ends up a “Heather” through excellent forgery. 

Between songs, all 3 boys meet up, and Halle and Nana begin their canon friendship, while Nana and Dag begin their destructive obsessive...thing. Nana’s remix Fight With Me occurs before Candy Store here, which is now a result of the Heathers messing with Asahi to get at Nana through her due to their newest’s friendship with smol and edgey. 

Dagda’s Freeze Your Brain and backstory is similar but it’s his mother that’s the worst. Nanashi is also a willing participant in the song in places because Edgelord (Swim in the ice~ Get lost in the pain~), and requires less prodding into the freezing; gulping down halfway through the song/scene when Dagda lays out his own stereotypical thoughts of the future. 

Nanashi tries to talk Asahi out of going to the trap, and is left frustrated and invites Dagda over after a fight with his adopted sister leaves him feeling alone. Gaston, over-aggressive from the distressing somehow disgraceful death of his father, cruelly shuts down Asahi at the party causing Hallelujah to bite back drawing Krishna’s ire (Big Fun) 

Asahi flees embarrassed, and Hallelujah is given an ultimatum, and decides to get joy in any way he can (Dead Boy Walking)...accidentally slipping in half-drunk to Nana and Dag mid-makeout. Enter Asahi, not drunk, confused, hurt, and needing her brother. To Dagda’s disappointment, he does not fuck that 15-year-old, instead, they spend the night consoling Hal and Asa. After both slink off for sleep in their own beds, Dagda convinces Nanashi to do something drastic for vengeance and to protect his new friend (The Me Inside Of Me).  “Myriad? Nice” is still in the work somewhere, it has to be.

The Me Inside Of Me is equal parts it’s canon piece as well as an examination of Toki McNamara’s internal struggle for survival and popularity brought upon her by her parents and watching the pain the ‘Heathers’ have inflicted on others, and her guilt over her recent actions. Nanashi accidentally ends up in a situation where he confronts her in front of a mirror noting that ‘despite everything, it’s still you’ while looking at himself. That it’s not our intention but our actions that decide the effect one has on the world, and there are not good or bad people, but good and bad actions, and what you choose to do is important. He may be fighting back tears of remorse. 

Seeing two of their newly lead clique is now getting on even better with that weird sweaty edge kid [LOUD TRUCK HORN] coerces Toki into inviting Nana to a party with a drunk G and N leading to Nanashi’s near rape while the new head ‘Heather’ taunts him through the door despite his pleas (Blue) leading to another breakout of violence, and Nanashi further retreating into his destructive romance with Dagda. 

Later while licking their wounds, a shaken, scared Nanashi is further talked around to another, less real this time for real, suicide (Our Love Is God.). This, naturally, ends in Double Homicide, panicked cries for it all to be an act, and confused screaming. A terrified Nanashi unable to back out anymore from fear, and guilt (D: Our love IS God~. N: ...Our Love is god~)

With the rise of the suicides, Flynn hosts an intervention to try and assist the troubled kids he’s in charge of (Shine A Light), while the living relatives of Gaston and Navarre cope with their loss...with mixed results (Dead Gay Son). 

Elsewhere Nanashi is confronting Dagda about his homicidal tendencies, and trying to convince him what they’ve done is wrong, and that he just wants to grow up (Seventeen [by a 15-year-old]), and it seems to work. For a time. 

Things settle into an uneasy peace, as Dagda and Nanashi’s romance vacillates between mutual obsession and destructive tendencies, and despite attempts at connection by Asahi everything seems to be falling apart for her. Hallelujah finds out through Dagda about the attempted rape, and the boy rips into Toki for it as she was the one Nanashi trusted, officially declaring his disdain for what they’ve done, and leaving the ‘Heathers’. 

Things continue to breakdown, ending with Nanashi breaking up with Dagda after everything sending the older man spiraling further downward into a nihilistic despair. Until he suddenly recovers with manic energy and gets everyone to sign a ‘suicide memorial’ petition. Nanashi’s warnings go unheard, as he further ignores Asahi unknowingly, leading to her attempted suicide (Kindergarten Brother). 

Learning of this through some nasty remarks by IS THAT A DEMONIC DUCK OF SOME SORT? Nanashi rushes to the hospital, and chokes out an apology to his unconscious sister when he’s confronted by his adopted father who’s been convinced by his ‘friend’ Jason Dagda that he, Nanashi, is suicidal as well, and may have caused Asahi’s attempt. Nanashi rushes home angry, confused, and overwhelmed only to arrive to Dagda awaiting him in the empty house. (Yo Girl)

Meanwhile, during practice for the televised special Westborough is putting on Toki is a little too honest, and gets derided, and kicked out, leading to her own attempted suicide. (Lifeboat, Shine A Light [REPRISE]) She is stopped by, of all people, Hallelujah. They have a very confused talk where he says she should do her thing, prove them all wrong with how strong she is without the ‘Heathers’ by the best her she can be, unintentionally echoing Nanashi’s earlier statement in a more positive light that she can only ever be her. Toki leaves in better spirits as Hallelujah receives a phone call. 

Clearly suffering a breakdown Dagda begins ranting his master plan to blow up the school and pretend it was a mass suicide using the signatures he got for his ‘petition’. ( You Were Meant To Be Mine throughout)Hiding in a closet Nanashi calls Hallelujah, the last conscious person he feels he can trust and explains, fast, confused and terrified where he is when he hears Dagda start really getting unhinged (Bring Marshmallows we’ll make S’mores~) and, without hanging up, improvises his own fake suicide. Still on the line Hallelujah hears Dagda’s reaction to Nanashi’s ‘death’ but nothing else, and moves faster. 

Hallelujah misses Nanashi in his rush, Nanashi does not miss Hallelujah. 

By the time he arrives Nanashi is gone, his phone left dead on the floor, with a note on the table addressed to him. 

‘I wanted someone strong who could protect me~’ it begins (Dead Boy Walking [REPRISE], He gets as far as ‘No one there deserves to die but me and the monster I’ve created~’ before he’s out the door heading back to their school cursing that idiot. 

Crashing into the auditorium Nanashi is confronted by Flynn who’s confused considering he was told the boy committed suicide, ‘well he’s wrong about a lot of things’ Nanashi snarks back. Toki, after a moment of indecision, abandons her cheerleading duties to check on Nanashi. Assuring her he’s fine he asks Flynn what’s beneath the gym to which the teacher replies ‘the boiler room’. With nothing but a cryptic ‘that’s it’ Nanashi nods, and tells Toki to get out while she can. Get far away, before making for the door. Nanashi, feeling a little Extra in his last moments exits calling back to the confused questioning from Flynn with ‘no time to talk I’m a dead boy walking’. Flynn is nonplussed but goes back to his big moment on the camera, Toki follows. 

Following the muffled roar of the crowd through the floor Nanashi finds the boiler room, and tells Dagda to step away from the bomb. After a bitter chuckle, Dagda notes Nanashi hasn’t lost his touch for faking suicides, before ranting his motives, pointing a gun at Nanashi, and Toki. Nanashi pulls out what he knows about Dagda, his pain, his feeling of isolation, and disbelief in permanent bonds without pain after what he’s been through, and tries to talk him down stepping closer with every statement to Dagda’s hesitant horror, hand shaking. ‘I wish you’d come with me.’ Dagda’s response? ‘I wish I had more TNT.’ A struggle ensues between Nanashi Toki, and Dagda to the dull roar of the Westborough fight song. In the scuffle Toki is thrown down, and Dagda points the gun at her unflinching, with a strangled ‘no’ Nanashi tackles him, they roll around as in the background ‘Westerborough will send you straight to-’ a gunshot. 

Shaking, covered in blood, and breathless Nanashi drops the gun in shock, wide eyes locked on Dagda’s bleeding form. Toki runs over fretting about the bombs. Nanashi tells her to go up, and get everyone to evacuate out front, while he checks the usual hideouts for people who duck out but don’t really want to leave. Once she’s gone Nanashi grabs the thermal detonator, and, limping, makes for the football field out back as Dagda slowly opens his eyes.

Out on the field Nanashi curls around the detonator with only the slightest hitch in his breathing. Hallelujah finds him first hauling him up and calling him an idiot, before spying the bomb. Nanashi tries to explain to get Hallelujah to leave because least of all does he deserve to die. As the boys get into it regarding a better way, and what Nanashi deserves Dagda enters, wounded, breathing heavily and listing drunkenly as he slowly dies. (I Am Damaged) Repeating Nanashi’s earlier words regarding how damaged they are Dagda half convinces Nanashi to give him the detonator, Hallelujah pries it the rest of the way and pulls Nanashi back. (Please step back now....little farther). Like a prayer Dagda repeats his mantra from his days with Nanashi for better or for worse. Wretchedly Nanashi answers back for Dagda to say hi to god/their love, just before the bomb detonates, and all sound is stolen from the 2 people left alive at the scene for a time. The dull ringing is replaced with urgent questions from feminine voices. 

The half-evacuated student body comes rushing at the explosion, Toki in front, curious, anxious, and worried. Just as it looks like the boys can process what’s being said Asahi pushes her way into the picture and demands tearily for an explanation to please, please just talk to her, despite her flaws as her insecurities come to the surface for the first time in front of others, especially her brother. Nanashi soothes her, and assures her they’ll explain everything when he’s less tired. Like when they’re (Seventeen [REPRISE]) before trying to get through to the impromptu audience that all being horrible to each other has accomplished is everyone hating themselves and everyone else a little more every day. 

Leaving without waiting for anyone to respond Nanashi suggests they pick up a movie with a happy ending. Toki is shocked to learn she’s invited as well, and Asahi wonders if there are even happy endings. Hallelujah, now with one of Nanashi’s arms around his shoulders to support him answers they can always hope. The new group shuffles away into the bright night a little more damaged, but recovering. Slowly and, hopefully, to their own happy endings.