#what the FUCK Keith. that's definitely not a dog

[discordiansamba]

thinking about Keith having Kosmo during his desert hermit years again and just picturing Adam stopping by for a visit. He regularly checks on Keith bc he's half convinced he'll get eaten by scorpions in his sleep or something (to which Keith just rolls his eyes and derisively calls him a 'city boy').

only this time when he visits him, Keith has the weirdest puppy he's ever seen. It's blue and it has glowing eyes and stripes. Keith just nonchalantly tells him that he found him out in the desert and decided to keep him. Adam has so many questions about that. You know that's not a dog, right?

Keith just shrugs. It's definitely a canine. It's fine if he calls it a dog.

And Adam just. pinches the bridge of his nose. Because he knows that tone Keith is using. It means that he can't talk him out of this. He's keeping the weird not-dog.

(He later learns it can teleport, when Keith and his not-dog teleport directly into his quarters. Hey Adam. You got anything to eat?)

[electricsynthesis]

the way I conceive of the garrison era where the team (sans pidge) were all attending at the same time is so specific. like first of all, it’s important that you understand that I don’t just think that keith was an irritatingly competent child prodigy. I think keith was the best irritatingly competent child prodigy to grace the garrisons doors, ever. I think keith was that 1 in a million talent, the kind of talent that makes you want to claw your eyes out because he’s tiny and he’s insane and he’s MEAN but by god he can fly better than anyone. like. I don’t just think keith was the top of the sim scores. I think he was beating the records for the sim scores. Ever.

so if there’s one thing that causes groups of students to go insane it’s ^^ that. It’s knowing that there’s a guy Your Age who is not only better than you but is better than Anyone Else. mix in the fact that socially, keith is like a stray dog that’s been kicked too many times, and you have a bad combination.

I think keith got away with a lot because while he may be the star student of the century, takashi shirogane is the golden boy. he can do no wrong. A kind man with a charmed childhood who dreamed of the stars. joined the military for all the right reasons and none of the wrong ones. Isn’t a suck up but absolutely bows to authority like it’s his job. iverson fucking LOVES him. Has never raised his voice. he’ll chew keith out for 20 mins and then turn to shirogane and sweet like milk will be all…… well I guess it’s fine. I won’t give kogane detention I guess

everyone loves shiro and everyone has loved shiro since shiro entered the school at baby faced aged 15 with stars in his eyes. He’s 23 and getting married and there is a not a soul on this earth that dislikes him. so he shows up like :) so my foster brother is joining us this year! and he warns everyone that keith is “pretty shy” and “a little anxious & awkward” and everyone’s like awwww shiros baby brother is gonna be shy :) and then shiro carts in this 16 year old hell child who talks to no one unless directly addressed and even then has to get a Look from shiro before he’s like. Hi. and somehow it is the angriest sounding hi ever conceived. It’s not surly. It’s not whiney. He just sounds mad

and shiro now spends half his time gripping this random ass kid by the scruff of his neck (metaphorically and literally depending on the situation) and very kindly explaining to him that getting into Physical Altercations with his classmates does not beget learning. and he keeps using these goofy ass phrases that belong on a motivational poster. what the fuck is “patience yields focus”. What the hell does that even mean. but then it seems to WORK??? The kids like yeah. Patience yields focus. You’re right.

I don’t even think half the fights keith gets into are really the fault of his overactive temper. I think insecurity and teenaged immortality is going to be causing these children to treat keith like the dirt underneath their boots. I’m talking sabotage. Someone definitely tries the “is nice to him to get his guard down in order to sabotage something” trick but it doesn’t work because by the time keith is at the garrison he already hates the world and the children are FEEDING into this . and he isn’t going to take this with a stiff upper lip he’s fucking biting people

The reason he doesn’t remember lance is because keith was getting bullied by like 3 other people who were all actual fighter pilots in his class and shiro spent all his time talking keith out of doing the social version of chewing on electrical chords. Lance was unmemorable because he was harmless . a bit of a dick maybe but that wouldn’t have registered to keith at the time. he remembers hunk as a guy who bought him lunch once when he came into the cafeteria bleeding from multiple lip splits after having gotten his wallet stolen

The administration has wanted keith out of this school for like an entire year by the time shiro leaves for kerberos. The only reason he isn’t court martialed to hell for slamming someone’s head into a locker hard enough to bounce is because shiro hit iverson with the puppy dog eyes. once Shiro’s gone it’s a foregone conclusion and only a matter of time before keith’s getting the boot. even the most minor infraction is going to send his ass packing . They are waiting for him to even slightly fuck up. 1 feather out of place

he still manages to go out in a blaze of glory by punching iversons lights out so bad he breaks his nose. he’s five foot five and seventeen. Iverson is 6’3 and 45. It’s the greatest thing the entire student body has ever seen. lance feels something awaken in him

[cheeseyberg]

Part 3 of this fic Part 4

Steve is shrugging on his vest and getting ready to clock in when Robin comes into the store and makes a beeline for him, "Are you and Nancy back together?"

"Good morning to you too, Robin. I slept fine last night. My morning was also pleasant. What the fuck are you talking about?"

"Steven Elizabeth Harrington-"

"Not my name." Steve rests his forearms on the counter facing Robin.

"-I walked into the kitchen yesterday to you twirling her around in your arms and goddamn giggling! Don't get smart with me."

"Wouldn't dream of it Bobby."

Robin leans across from Steve, mirroring his posture, "Seriously, if you're back together you have to tell me, it's best friend law. Are you a criminal Steven? Are you breaking best friend laws?"

"Stop government naming me! No, we are not back together. We're friends again and she was teasing me about my stupidly embarrassing crush on Eddie Munson. She said she thinks he likes me back Rob. But you're friends with him, you would know if he liked me, wouldn't you?"

"I... In theory, yes that is probably information I would know." Robin straightens up and tilts her head to the side like she's considering the possibility.

"And you're my best friend, and best friend law would mean you're obligated to tell me, right?"

Robin steps back from the counter putting space between her and Steve and glances behind her towards the door. "I'm not sure that best friend case law covers that particular area."

Steve stands straight up and smacks his hand against the counter and then points at Robin, "YOU DO KNOW SOMETHING!"

"I don't know anything or even if there is anything to know and even if I did know something, which I definitely do not, it wouldn't be my secret to tell. Okay bye Steve, see you later!" Robin yells over her shoulder as she runs out the door, saying it all so fast that Steve is impressed that she didn't pause for breath.

"Well, that was weirder than usual, even for her." Steve mutters as he watches her mount her bike and take off down the street.

"It definitely was." A voice says from Steve's right side, making him jump.

"Where the hell did you come from!?" Steve looks wildly around and past Max, scanning for any more of his children sneaking up on him.

"I've been here since before you, Keith let me in when he opened. And for the record, Robin definitely knows more than she's saying."

"How do you know?" Steve is suspicious but still desperate for information, "Wait, how much of that did you hear?"

"All of it. But your 'stupidly embarrassing crush on Eddie Munson' isn't exactly a secret, Steven. You're always looking at him like a lost puppy dog. Like you want to wrap him up and take him home to-"

"Okay! Enough Maxine-"

"Now who's government naming?"

"You started it."

"Actually, Robin started it, but do you want to know how I know she's keeping secrets or not?"

"You're right Max, Robin is the villain here, please tell me what she's hiding."

"Don't try to butter me up. And I never said I knew what she was hiding, just that she is hiding something. I can guess at what it is, but I think you already know. After we left your house yesterday Eddie dropped off Dustin, but Robin came back to the trailer park with Eddie and me. I went home and Robin went with Eddie. About an hour later, I heard the van leave and when it came back Eddie was alone, so he must have been dropping her off."

"So, they were alone for about an hour and that's your proof?"

"No, that's circumstantial. My proof is that when Eddie came home, he knocked on my door and asked me for help running errands today. He said he would give me $5 to return some movies for him. He dropped me off 20 minutes ago and he's picking me up," Max looks towards the front of the store where Eddie's van is pulling into the lot, "right about now. Combined with whatever that was that Robin just did, I think that smells like a plan."

Steve could see it. It made sense. If Eddie did like him then that would explain why Robin ran in here asking about Nancy and why Max was here, giving Eddie a chance to come in and see Steve. Robin knew he would be working right now, and he could just bet that Eddie had been waiting off on a side street for Robin to report back about Nancy. Max had clearly already put all that together and he could see in her face that she was watching him fit the pieces together as well.

"You know, you're a lot smarter than we give you credit for Steve," Max smirked at him and then turned towards the door as Eddie walked in.

@charliechaplintheawesome @flwerkitty @dbquills @zerokrox-blog @bidisastersworld @respect-snails @estrellami-1 @4nemo1egend

[rileyh20]

Bonjour.

Pls, if you so kindly will, share some of your HCs?

Hello! Since ya didn't specify I will add all the HCs I have at the moment.

(I have not worked on them in a bit cuz of stuff, and I don't have that many yet)

Ponyboy Curtis:

A pyromantic, he loves fire (Until the church shit)

Has a fucking terrifying glare, but only actually glares at people when they wake him up (His poor brothers)

Should not be left alone around a stack of books (He’ll read them all in like two hours)

A really fast reader, but he reads the book over and over again to the point he basically memorizes it

Major third wheel, doesn’t matter if the ship is Jally, or Stevepop, or something else, he’s just a third wheel at heart

Definitely reads the book before he watches the movie 

Sometimes when he wants to write he just can’t, so he does other things instead, but once he’s in the zone, he’ll write for hours without hearing anything around him (He’s just like me fr)

Sarcastic and sassy af sometimes (Because I want him to be, no other reason)

He likes grandma hobbies (You know what I’m talking about, the knitting, sewing kinds of stuff, crafting thingies)

He would be the kind of person who helps you get your locker unstuck when you are either too scared to ask a strong person, or you don’t want your locker beaten into scraps when you could just ask Ponyboy

Cooks sometimes, he ain’t the best, but he isn’t terrible at it (He especially does it if Darry looks like he had a long day)

Sometimes he’s the only person able to stop Sodapop from putting food dye into the food (Especially if Darry is the one cooking)

Sorry y’all, but autistic Ponyboy is what I got for you guys 

Sodapop Curtis:

Gets lots of tips from women (Shares it with Steve sometimes)

Tries to understand why Ponyboy likes books so much, but honestly does not get him crying over them (He’s trying his best guys)

He was a MAJOR biter as a kid, like for no reason, just CHOMP

Has ADHD and absolutely NO ONE can tell me otherwise (Don’t even try)

Genuinely loved Sandy, and was so heartbroken when she broke up with him (Kinda canon?)

Darrel "Darry" Jr. Curtis:

Cries when needs to sign parent approval forms for Ponyboy, but if someone’s close by he tries to hold it in

Has a favorite book, it’s one his father got him before he died

He doesn’t like to read, but sometimes Ponyboy will read the book to him

Has shit eyesight, but refuses to get glasses

Darry doesn’t take care of himself when he gets sick

Darry is a fucking CLINGY person when he’s emotional (Specifically sad or stressed), like you ARE NOT able to get away from that man when he’s like that (Especially Ponyboy)

Doesn’t smoke at all so it doesn’t ruin his body

Stole a shirt from his dad’s closet before he died, it’s still in his clothes but he never wears it or puts it back 

Sometimes Darry sobs into his dad’s shirt after a hard day (The shirt from above)

Impulsive biter, just like if someone sticks their hand or arm in front of his face, he wont think and just chomps on them (Ponyboy and Sodapop try to warn the others, but they don’t listen)

Nothing for Steve Randle yet

Nothing for Keith "Two-Bit" Mathews yet

Dallas "Dally" Winston:

Scared of spiders

He’s also scared of dogs

Johnny Cade:

Definitely says a few dirty jokes 

I feel like he would be the type of person to have a summer job for some reason? (Ponyboy and Dally visit him at work sometimes and it’s chaos)

[autisticlancemcclain]

“I know, buddy, I know.” Keith scratches behind his big dumb dog’s ears, pressing a million kisses to his forehead because he’s got Black to himself for the next day and there’s no one (Shiro) to clown him for it. Kosmo barks excitedly, wagging his floofy tail so fast it beats against the dashboard and system controls. Keith laughs, moving his scratching fingers down the wolf’s head and neck and to his back, where he likes to be scratched best.

“I know you’re hyper, huh?” he coos, blowing a raspberry. “But that’s what you get. You know you always get too excited when you hang out with Lance. You should have stayed with me.”

At the mention of the Red Paladin’s name, Kosmo starts howling, bounding out from Keith’s lap and tumbling to the floor, nails clacking against the metal as he flips around Black’s cockpit.

Keith huffs. “You raise a wolf from a pup, showering him in treats and affection, and you still fall second best to the first guy he meets who teaches him to fetch. Figures.”

It’s ridiculous, is what it is. Two straight years together on the space whale, but Kosmo lays eyes on Lance for one measly second and falls in love. He’s genuinely obsessed with the guy, and it doesn’t help that Lance is unbelievably smug about it, indulging Kosmo’s every whim and burst of affection just to grate on Keith. He has on twelve seperate occasions radioed the Black Lion to talk to Kosmo only, completely ignoring Keith.

“I can’t blame ya,” Keith says quietly. His voice is still a little teasing, still a little exasperated, but even he can hear the gooey fondness in it. “Lance is just that good, huh?”

Kosmo barks again, loud and fast, then flashes as he blips out of existence then back into existence right on Keith’s lap. Keith chokes as 200 pounds of floof is suddenly deposited on his person, but recovers quickly. (Kosmo will never remember that he is no longer a little puppy. Keith is just going to have to get used to having his lungs crushed.)

He starts to stroke Kosmo’s fur again, gently this time, calming him down.

“I should say something,” he says, more to himself than to his dog. “Ugh. I mean, it’s Lance, right? He’s my best friend. He’ll most definitely tease me, but he won’t, like, mock me or anything. He’s good like that. He knows exactly when to be serious, like during that last gala thing we had when we landed on a planet a while back. He just knew I was feeling off, just like that.”

Keith buried his face in Kosmo’s fur, hiding his smile. “He’s just…everything, you know? I’m always thinking about him. I have been for years. Hell, I talked about him so much on that stupid whale that you recognised him before you even met him, buddy. That’s objectively bonkers. But I can’t…” He sighs, leaning back in the pilot seat and staring unseeingly through the windshield. A red dot flashes gently at the bottom corner, but he pays it no mind.

“He’s sweet when no one’s looking. And even when people are looking, sometimes. And I’ll die before I even imply it in his direction, but he’s funny, too. And his fucking brain, dear God, that man could outwit anyone if he was under enough pressure. He saved our asses more than once when we were stumbling our way through this co-leading thing in the beginning. And anyone with eyes can tell that he’s hot.” Keith’s ears burn a little, thinking of the Coalition videos. “Seriously hot. And…leggy.”

He cracks up, embarrassed giggles bubbling up his throat. His next words are muffled by the hand he has pressed to his face. “God, I want him to fuck me up.”

Kosmo raises his head from where it was resting on Keith’s knee, staring at him in what Keith can only assume is judgment.

“Shut up,” Keith says hotly. “You once farted so loud you scared yourself and cried for ten minutes. You don’t get to judge me about being embarrassing.”

Keith is losing it. He is defending his character to a dog. He groans loudly, dragging his hand down his face.

“I should tell him, shouldn’t I,” he mutters. “Just — come out with it. ‘Leandro Esposita-McClain, I am in love with you.’ Straight to the point. Rip off the band-aid.”

Kosmo yips quietly. Keith snorts.

“Yeah, you’re right. That’s crazy. He’s my friend, I don’t want to ruin things. I’ll just suffer in silence the next time he looks at me and the fuckin’ sun bleeds into his eyes and makes them look like golden honey or whatever. Jesus.” He reaches for his book and props it open, muttering to himself. “It’s always the fuckin’ pretty ones that get me, huh?”

Kosmo barks loudly in what can only be agreement, and Keith scoffs, flicking him on the shout. “Yeah, yeah, you lug. Bug off with the teasing and let me read in peace, alright? I’ll tell him someday. He doesn’t need to know now.”

.

.

.

(A beep echoes through the Red Lion’s cockpit as her paladin slams on the ‘call end’ button, eyes wide and chest heaving, having listened curiously when he’d been radioed out of nowhere mid-conversation between the Bladk Paladin and his dog. And then listened in shock as the Black Paladin had brought up him. Brought up being in love with him, with his heart and his eyes and his legs, apparently.

Red blooms on his cheeks.)

———

based on this post by @petricorah

[slut4thebroken]

Space wolf

Pairing | Keith Kogane x reader

Summary | Keith brings home a wolf, cat person!reader is not happy

Warnings | cringe worthy fluff

Words | 1.5k

Notes | I’m not used to writing fluff so I’m sorry if it’s bad lol. I made this in November and it’s been done for a while and I’m trying to get over my fear of posting my fics lmao

Ao3 link | <3

Masterlist

“What the fuck is that?” Was the first thing you asked when you finally returned to the castle. You were on a mission with the blade, so you weren’t there when he arrived. 

“It’s my wolf.” Keith smiled, petting its head. “His name is Kosmo.”

“Why do you have a wolf??” 

“Is this her?” The woman standing next to him gave him a knowing smile. Keith blushed and introduced you to her before turning back to you. 

“This is my mom, Krolia.” He told his mom about you? No, don't be silly… He probably told her about everyone on the team. 

“It’s really nice to meet you.” You smiled, trying to act normal after Keith just came back and all of a sudden had a mom and wolf. Speaking of…

“Why do you have a wolf?” You whisper yelled at him. Krolia excused but neither of you acknowledged her.  

“We found him! What was I supposed to do? Leave him?” You stared at him with wide eyes. 

“Yes!” You said in disbelief and he looked at you like you were crazy. “It’s a wolf-“

“First of all, don’t call him “it.’” You rolled your eyes. “Second of all, it’s okay for you to adopt an animal but not me?” 

“That’s different.” 

“How?!”

“Princess is a dignified, intelligent, actually useful cat. That,” You pointed at the furry beast sitting obediently by his side, “is a wolf. Not even a dog- a wolf!” 

“Kosmo is a thousand times more useful than Princess!” He touched Kosmo and all of a sudden they were both standing right in front of you. You tried taking a step back but he wrapped his arm around you and put his hand on your lower back, pulling you into him. 

You gasped and stared at him wide eyed. Partly because of what the wolf just did but mostly because Keith was different. You didn’t notice at first that he was even taller than you now, or that he just seemed to be bigger in general. You put your hands on his chest to ground yourself. Yep. Definitely bigger. 

“I missed you.” He said before leaning in to kiss you. You snaked your hands up to grab his hair and the back of his neck. His other hand reached up to grab your hip. You pulled back but stayed close to him. 

“It hasn’t been that long.” You laughed breathlessly.  

“It has for me.” This time, when he leaned down, he put his head next to yours and wrapped his arms around your waist, hugging you. You tightened your arms around him. 

“How long?” You asked quietly.

“Two years.” That made you pull back just enough to look at him. 

“What? Where were you?” 

“Quantum abyss. Long story.” You frowned, running your hands through his hair and lightly scratching his head. 

“I’m sorry.” You wanted to know more, but knew he’d tell you when he’s ready. 

“Don’t be. I missed you a lot, but it was nice being able to get to know Krolia more.” He gave you a small smile. 

“I can’t believe you found her.” You smiled back at him. 

“Wait so you’re- you’re half Galra?” Your eyes widened at the realization. He did not look half Galra. You probably would���ve guessed maybe ⅛ Galra? But not half. You moved his hair out of the way to look at his ear then moved his lips to check his teeth. 

“What are you doing?” He chuckled. 

“You don’t look half Galra. I would ask if you’re sure she’s your mom but she looks exactly like you. It’s kinda freaky actually.” 

“She does?” 

“I’m serious, you guys look almost identical. Like if you were full Galra and a girl, that’s what you would look like. Don’t worry though, milfs aren’t my type.” You said teasingly and he pouted. God he’s adorable.

“I only have eyes for one Galra Kogane.” You smiled at him, playing with his hair again. “Spoiler alert: it’s you.” He smiled sheepishly and looked down. 

“I really missed you.” He hugged you again. After a beat he pulled away and gave you another kiss. 

He managed to convince you to let Kosmo meet Princess. That’s how you found yourself walking to your room, Keith beside you and Kosmo trailing behind him. You opened the door and Princess ran up to Keith. He picked her up and scratched her head a bit, listening to her purr. 

“I missed you too.” He chuckled when she started trying to rub her head on his face. “Kosmo, stay.” He waited outside the door while you sat on your bed with Keith and Princess. You gave each other a nervous look before he called for Kosmo. 

Princess immediately became hostile, jumping off Keith and hiding behind you. You just hoped that she’d calm down enough to sense that you didn’t see him as a threat. You don’t really know why, or how it happened, but you have a similar bond with your cat as Allura does with the mice. 

You turned around on the bed and put her in your lap, hiding her from Kosmo who was getting curious and starting to move closer. You closed your eyes and lightly pet her head, trying to let her feel your emotions toward the wolf. She was like this with Keith at first too, and it didn’t help that he was apprehensive about her also. 

You felt her start to calm down and become more curious rather than scared. She stood up on her back legs, resting her front paws on your chest, and peered over your shoulder to investigate. 

Keith had Kosmo sit, so the only movement was his panting and his tail sweeping across the floor. 

“It’s okay.” You whispered and she dropped down into your lap then started walking toward the space on the bed between you and Keith. Kosmo leaned forward as far as he could without getting up and Princess flinched back. When she realized he was only sniffing and not trying to attack she moved closer and sniffed him as well. 

“This is going a lot better than I thought it would.” Keith whispered to you. 

“Good thing too. Cause if they hate each other, Princess isn’t the one to go. Seniority and all that.” You whispered back, lightheartedly. Out of the corner of your eye you watched Princess jump to the floor. 

“I hate to break it to you… but if we’re going by seniority, Kosmo and I aren’t the ones leaving.” He leaned into your space and gave you a small smirk. You narrowed your eyes at him. 

You lunged at him, pushing him back on the bed until you were laying on top of him. He immediately started laughing alongside you and fighting back. He got you on your back and you started tickling him so he grabbed your wrists and held them down. Both of your laughter died down until you were just breathing heavily and smiling like idiots. A sudden weight being dropped on top of him, making him fall onto you, forced a breath out of you. 

“Ow…” You watched as Kosmo fell off of Keith until he was laying next to you, panting and ready to play. You gave him a faux glare. 

“I’ll let it slide this time, wolf. But if it happens again, especially if we’re in the middle of something, you will be banned from this room.” You tried to keep the serious expression on your face but broke out into a fit of laughter when Kosmo responded by tilting his head and looking at Keith. 

“She’ll warm up to you soon, don’t worry.” Keith whispered and Kosmo seemed content with that answer. He yawned and then put his head down on your arm. 

“He better not drool on me.” You said when he closed his eyes. There was a beat of silence and you looked at Keith who had a guilty expression. 

“He’s kind of a drooler… sorry.” 

“Remind me why I let you and the cosmic wolf in my room again? Let alone on my bed.” 

“Because you love me.” He smiled, releasing one of your wrists to tuck your hair behind your ear. “And by extension, him too.” He added and you scoffed. 

“Is that so?” 

“Yep.” He rested his chin on your chest and you brought your free hand to his hair, playing with it and scratching his head. He closed his eyes and he- 

He started purring.

You had to check to make sure it wasn’t just Princess but she was laying down on the other side of the room and you could feel the vibrations on your chest. 

“I do love you.” You whispered. “And I guess, maybe, the space beast too.” 

“You know you can just call him Kosmo.” He turned his head so his cheek was on your chest now. He was still laying on top of you and even if he crushed you to death, you wouldn’t even consider moving. Kind of like when your cat lays on you. 

He opened his eyes to look at you before saying, “I love you too.” You smiled and he closed his eyes again, continuing purring. 

“You better not drool on me either.” You could feel him smile against your chest. 

“No promises.” 

[klanced]

dog au

this is less about designating them as a specific dog breed and more about the Vibes

keith: he’d be one of those dogs that are bred to have a specific job but he’s unemployed (read: house dog) so he just constantly destroys the house and eats the walls. neurotic as fuckkkkkkk. he would calm down if you gave him a sheep or something

allura: one of those dogs that looks like a horse like a greyhound or an afghan hound. if allura was a dog she’d have a long skinny snout and huge soulful eyes that make her look like a prey animal. neurotic as FUCK but she doesn’t eat the walls like keith instead she just micromanages the shit out of her daily walks

shiro: obviously you could type-cast him as one of the Quintessential Japanese Dog Breeds but that’s such low-hanging fruit imo. i do think shiro is one of those dogs that was bred to thrive in subzero temperatures but now he’s forced to live in like san francisco so he constantly suffers from heat exhaustion. he’s still missing one of his front legs in this au idk maybe zarkon hit him with his car or something.

hunk: born to be a teacup dog forced to be Huge. if you compare him in the tags to a golden retriever i will stone you. if hunk was a dog i think he’d be one of those dogs that have beautiful bangs and luscious facial hair like a portuguese water dog. i actually think hunk would have less anxiety if he was a dog

lance: honestly idk what kind of dog lance would be all i can say definitively is that: 1) he’d be one of those dogs with a weird shaped head, and 2) he’d be one of those dogs that were bred to Hunt and Chase. so looooong legs. i also think he would have very short + thin + smooth fur and he wants to be a lap dog so, so, so bad but he unfortunately weighs like 50+ pounds

pidge: i think pidge would be one of those mean as fuck small dogs. like she’s an angel to her family but a total terror at the dog park to the point that you have to walk her at weird hours so there are less dogs around for her to bully. i know pidge is comically short in canon but as a dog i think she’d be a small to medium sized breed. i also think pidge would be some kind of spaniel or one of those dogs that have alarmingly human-like eyes

coran: ok i know i said this wouldn’t be a specific list but coran is CLEARLY some kind of terrier and he is specifically one of those breeds that has glorious muttonchops like an airedale terrier or a scottish terrier. if coran was a dog he’d be the purest kind of purebred with a carefully registered bloodline going back hundreds of generations in scotland

[hibiscusangel15]

Entity Horror Movie Rec List: The Stranger

The Stranger is an entity that personally freaks me out. I already don’t like interacting with strangers if I can help it, and the idea of a creature completely stripping away all that you are and no one, not even those closest to you, being able to tell the difference is horrifying.

A lot of the movies on this list rightfully feature aliens, specifically those of the shape-shifting or infiltrating society variety, and loss of humanity.

Invasion of the Body Snatchers

The original nightmare that threatened the world!

I didn’t put a specific year for this one because honestly both the 1956 and 1978 versions are great movies in their own rights. The ‘56 version is a bit cheesy by today’s standards, but honestly, the first time I saw it, I was freaked out by the concept for days after. It’s still pretty effective, in my opinion.

Both versions depict the fear of The Stranger the best of the movies on this list. The infused paranoia of the ‘78 version is near-perfect for it. Noticing something is wrong with the people around you, but not exactly knowing what is something The Stranger adores playing around with. That and clowns, I guess.

Fun fact: The ‘56 version was originally set to have a more miserable ending, but the studio forced the director to shove in some feel-good end instead. I think the more nihilistic ‘78 version revels in that opportunity instead. It also features a cameo by the main character of the original, so it’s almost a self-titled sequel, in a way.

The Thing (1982)

The ultimate in alien terror.

What is there to say about The Thing that hasn’t already been said? Its practical effects are disgusting, grotesque, and unlike anything that has come before (or since). My favorite John Carpenter movie bar-none. Everyone from Kurt Russel to Keith David to even the dog is so good in this movie.

The main characters getting picked off by a bloodthirsty creature that can look like any one of them at any time makes this movie a paranoia-fueled, tense nightmare and I love it. They work through who among them (lol) might be an alien in really smart ways. It has quite a bit of body horror and nasty practical effects, but I would still recommend you watch this anyway.

Games like Among Us are heavily inspired by its premise (and I think InnerSloth credits this movie directly for inspiration). If you haven’t seen The Thing (1982) yet, I cannot recommend this movie enough. Just watch it.

IT

Listen, a movie rec list covering The Stranger wouldn’t be complete without some reference to clowns or the circus. What shape-shifting, fear-hungry clown suits this Entity better than Pennywise? If you say the Killer Klowns from Outer Space, I stg...

Obvious references to Tumblr’s obsession with 2017′s Pennywise aside, both iterations of Stephen King’s IT are fun in different ways. Tim Curry’s 1990 mini-series Pennywise is a lot goofier while still being off-putting while Bill Skarsgard’s Pennywise leans more towards being sinister.

Both operate like a creature of The Stranger, in that they lure in their victims with something seemingly innocent and familiar before flipping it into something unfamiliar and wrong. Literally the definition of stranger danger.

To be honest (and I think most people agree), the kids’ half of the story is way more fun than the adult stuff. It: Chapter Two’s cast is fantastic, but it doesn’t totally save the latter half of the story being a bit laughable compared to what their kid versions faced. Probably because (spoilers) they literally bully Pennywise to death. Like how can you not find that fucking hilarious what the fuck.

(Spoilers over) Obligatory clown/circus-related movie lol. They’re both set in different time periods, which reflect different kinds of fears of the time. The 1990 version is set in the 1950s/1970s and the 2017 version is set in the 1980s/2010s. I think both are worth a watch, though you can watch whichever you feel like and you’ll get pretty much the same experience.

They Live (1988)

If I had a nickel for every time John Carpenter made a movie in the 80s about aliens disguising themselves as human, I’d have two nickels. Which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird that it’s happened twice.

All jokes aside, They Live is a horror-comedy that definitely leans more into the comedy and social commentary than horror. Whether you find the alien designs horrifying is more personal preference (I find them kinda goofy), but what they set out to accomplish is still pretty relevant today.

Even the regular humans in this movie fail to trust each other or are immediately shut down when they try. It also has one of the LONGEST fight scenes I’ve ever seen in my life (it’s kinda hilarious how long it goes on tbh). Definitely recommend if you need something light to start off with.

Under the Skin (2013)

“You don't want to wake up, do you?”

I will admit, Under the Skin is an artsy film that will not be to everyone’s tastes, but I think it’s accessible enough for those new to horror to try out, too. It definitely requires subtitles if you have trouble understanding thick accents, though.

Under the Skin is about an alien disguised as a human woman luring unsuspecting men to her domain. What ends up happening to them is something I don’t want to spoil. The imagery is so haunting and surreal that it’s hard for me to describe, anyway.

I also think it’s an interesting look into what an alien (or in TMA, any Entity-born creature) might do if it wanted to look beyond its purpose and join humanity. Think Agnes Montague if she was an Avatar of The Stranger instead of The Desolation, I suppose. It’s as tragic as it is unsettling.

END

That’s it for The Stranger! Most of these are classics that most people have seen, but I still feel like these are very fitting.

If you guys want a Part 2, I could definitely delve into movies that dive more into Uncanny Valley territory. I want these rec lists to be more a crash course into horror rather than digging deep into the weirder stuff I’ve seen (just yet).

More Entity rec lists:

The Eye

[imagoddamnonionmason]

OCS ask, does your OCs have anything important items to them that they treasure?

Oooh, I think I remember saying aaaages ago that Jodie definitely has something she keeps on her person all the time. I'll try and keep this neat and tidy!

Jodie

A drawing that toddler David Mason drew for her the first time she met him.

A photo of Frank taken of him in Vietnam, Sarah Mason gave her.

Photos of her family in general, she has some pinned on her dresser in her shared room with Frank.

Not necessarily something she treasures, but it is important to her; her puzzle book. She completed it but kept it, filling the pages to the brim with notes and thoughts - it helped her through her recovery after the brainwashing. You would look at all the scribbles and notes, some in English, some in Russian, some codes and nonsensical babbling; it's the visualisation of a mind on the brink of breaking. When she looks back on it, she's reminded of how far she's come.

Sarah

A huge photo album she has of hundreds of photos she'd collected over the years.

Her wedding ring.

A lock of David's baby hair in a locket, she used to wear it around her neck.

Ashley

Her dad's bandanna - I feel like he would give it to her later on in life.

After her mum passes later in her life, she would definitely ask Frank if she could have Jodie's wedding ring to wear on a chain around her neck. (Later when both would have passed, she would also add Frank's to that chain, too, keep 'em both with her).

A leather jacket Jodie bought her.

Keith

idk man, this guy is an enigma. Would he even treasure anything? I suppose this would depend on the AU. Canon Keith probably doesn't give two shits about sentimentality or treasuring inanimate objects - will they give him what he wants? No.

In the Boys AU I have with @walder-138 it's another photo, but it would be of him and Liberty's OC Annika. The image is probably catching her off guard and he's being a bit of an annoying jerk, but you can tell he took it with good intentions. For once, the man actually cares about someone more than himself.

OR actually, probably something that she made for him, if she ever did make anything for him. Like, maybe a shiftily made badge that says 'u suck' or something, but he'd treasure it.

Franca

I think I mentioned this in another post, but I can't find it; a Saint Christopher necklace her mum gave her. Her mum says it belonged to her great grandmother. Franca's relationships with her family are, for a lack of a better word, fucked; she remembers the last conversation with her mum was hushed and rushed, with her fumbling to push the necklace into her hand. All the while, her mum is looking over shoulder to check the dad isn't watching; it was also the last time she saw her mum. Saint Christopher is believed to watch over travellers; it's comforting for her to think that, even though her mum doesn't really speak with her anymore (due to the dad) that her mum still wanted her to be safe, hence being given that specific necklace. She treasures it for that reason.

Nanette

Similarly to Sarah, it's her wedding ring - even after Soap's death Nanette wears it. I don't think she'll ever take it off.

A jumper of Soap's, the smell of him is slowly fading, but for now it still feels like he's there when she wears it.

An old, fraying teddy of a cartoonish looking dog - it's got big black beady eyes, the cushioning isn't as fluffed as it used to be. It's a childhood teddy and she keeps it on her bed.

A baby book - it details all of Lilidh's first things; first word, first step, first tooth. You get it!

Stephanie

A room filled with artwork her late husband Zach did. The room is untouched and will remain so, everything in there is like gold to her and she will stab someone if they touch it.

Pictures of her mum.

Some rings that were passed down from her mum's side of the family - when not at work, she wears all of them. They really suit her!

Klaus

His pocket knife, it was a gift and has his name engraved on the handle.

A black woollen hat, says it's good luck.

A pair of cufflinks from his Grandad!

Esme

A woven bracelet that's hardly ever off her left wrist.

A broken keychain with a funky little frog on it, it was an image of a flat piece of plastic, but it's been snapped in half.

[lodessa]

Doing a little season 3 rewatch of Veronica Mars to make sure things line up right in The Backup and oh boy . . .

So many of my lingering complaints immediately resurfaced there's also stuff I had forgotten about (and even some stuff that rewatching is like "oh, they were actually doing a thing") but here's a couple thoughts four episodes in:

The cast is still too jam packed, the years haven't changed my opinion on that, and it makes so many things seem forced or spread thin.

Some of this is things like spending all this time of Dick but (after an initial episode where it seemed like maybe he was going to have some actual character arc following what happened in season 2) just having him be the same old Dick. Some of it is trying so hard to make Piz matter or whatever. Some of it is no one's plotlines actually truly entertwining.

And you can definitely see the fanservicing rounding off of Logan's character happening, but hot damn I forgot I missed him. Like Rose Tyler of Doctor Who, the fannish monomania over the years has made me reflexively flinch from his very name but Logan is so damned compelling. He's so wounded and self loathing, messy, but also somehow still so tender. A victim of so much loss and abuse and he does fucked up shit and Veronica is right not to trust him sometimes, but he's also just such a damned woobie (I have not used that term in so long I almost forgot it) in the way that is so addictive (and destructive because the impulse is always ultimately to lose all the things that actually make that vulnerability interesting in the interests of saccharine perfection.

My boy, Weevil. I weep. I scream. I tear my hair. I dream of Mars, Mars, & Navarro Investigations. He's flawed and he's angry and he makes mistakes, but Eli Navarro is also so smart, dogged, insightful. He hates injustice, drugs, and abuse. He's crazy hyper competent. want someone to figure out the truth, fix the body of your car, get the AC working? He can do any of that with a facility you didn't ask for or expect. (Maybe don't have him take your phone calls though, at least not without some actual training.) And what does he really want? A chance. The opportunity to do something that matters. Someone to look at him and see something of value (because he sure doesn't right now).

Which really should have been the through line of this season and these characters. Logan is terrified of being his dad, of actually trying and failing at college, of being alone. Weevil is trying to keep his head down and get by, but it is humiliating and awful and he wants so much to prove he is more than that. Like both of them, Mac is afraid she's broken, that she can't move past what happened with Cassidy, that she doesn't know how to be close to anyone. Dick should be confronting the fact that what happened with his brother and dad did shake him and he's not impervious. Wallace's half assed plot line about struggling to maintain both school and basketball could have been so much more about the transition from high school and college and worrying that you aren't actually special or good enough. Even Keith is doubting his judgement, as a professional and as a father to a certain extent. And Veronica, Veronica is afraid that she can't move on: can't trust, can't hold on to friendships, can't move past her high school relationship. But I know that the show doesn't actually go there with any of these plotlines, so to speak. It doesn't have time to, nor does it want to.

[steddie-fanfic-recs]

Still The One

by Legitcookie

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationship: Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson, Maxine "Max" Mayfield/Lucas Sinclair (background) Character: Steve Harrington, Eddie Munson, Maxine "Max" Mayfield, The Party (Stranger Things), Lucas Sinclair, Dustin Henderson, Mike Wheeler, Will Byers, Eleven | Jane Hopper, Robin Buckley, Keith (Stranger Things) Additional Tags: Miscommunication, Angst with a Happy Ending, not really angsty but yk, Idiots in Love, you meddling kids with no dog, Good Babysitter Steve Harrington, Eddie Munson Lives, Gay Eddie Munson, Bisexual Steve Harrington, Not Canon Compliant, Everybody Lives, darcy is the world's best beta reader, gremlins being gremlins, POV Max Words: 5,399 Chapters: 1/1

Summary

”Why do you have to make everything so fucking difficult, Eddie?” Max's eyes widened, hand stopping just before making contact with the closed door to Steve and Eddie's apartment. ”Oh, I'm so sorry, your highness. Please keep telling me the same thing over and over again. I can't wait to hear if you put a new spin on it!” “Quit the bullshit, I wouldn't have to keep telling you if you did it this century.” This was not what Max had been expecting when she drove over that morning. She expected to knock on the door, be greeted by two lovesick buffoons that had recently moved in together, and grab the Dungeons & Dragons book Mike had left there. Apparently having a car made everyone think they could ask for favors. Well after this lovely start to the morning, that wasn't going to happen again any time soon. She should leave. She definitely shouldn't press her ear to the door to hear better. ~Or, Max overhears an argument thinking a breakup is imminent and gets The Party to help

[alluraaaa]

18 for the whole team. I'd like to know your thoughts.... (sits in front of you with a notepad and pencil) owo

VERY good question arbor. class is in session

18. what they’d go to see a therapist about

(this quickly turned into what the team is like in therapy as well. but i love talking so <3)

the entire team would obviously be in therapy about. the intergalactic war they were on the front lines of. that goes without saying but i’m saying it anyway

shiro: not just the PTSD but how he’s so nonchalant about it. he goes into his first session like “yeah. i think i have PTSD? like i’m not a professional i’m not gonna definitively say i do but… (describes how often he gets panic attacks and how distressing they are in detail)” and the therapist is like “😀… okay. do you wanna talk about what happened? it’s okay if you don’t it might be difficult to recall”

meanwhile shiro’s like “oh yeah! i was kidnapped and forced to fight to the death in a gladiator ring for a year. then i had to lead a team of teenagers in a war against a ten thousand year old empire. just the seven of us against an entire militia :|-)” and the therapist is already pulling out all of her books on post traumatic stress like “uh huh uh huh uh huh continue”

keith: getting keith to actually participate in therapy in a meaningful way is gonna be like trying to pull teeth. and once he’s in there it’s gonna be boring conversations about his day where his therapist sneakily gets him to open up about his past. you ever see in the office when micheal goes to therapy with toby? it’s like that.

but when keith starts actually opening up he forms a ride or die bond with his therapist and is the only person he talks to so openly about his abandonment issues. he’s just on the couch crying his eyes out like “diane… you’re the realest bitch i’ve ever met.” and diane is like “thanks keith. you’re real as hell too. i can tell the people in your life really love you” and thus a new person gains keith as a purse dog

pidge: she definitely needs to learn how to be more open with her affection. stems from repeated loss like keith and like keith her response is to be more guarded. but rather than be closed off and a loner she snaps at people and is aggressive to people before they can be aggressive to her #bulliedgang ✌️ but as she’s grown closer to the team her jabs are more lovingly said, though still she’s scared to openly admit she loves people because ew affection she’s gonna get shoved in a locker!!!!

her approach to getting into therapy is very similar to keith in terms of “fuck that i’m perfectly fine” but she lets her walls down a lot quicker because she didn’t lose quite as much as keith #hasamom

lance: i know i said the post war therapy goes without saying but he’d be processing the war so much more than the others. his personal issues are an afterthought when he’s dealing with “omg i KILLED someone diane what do i tell their family?” also he doesn’t like talking about himself in terms of “i’ve had issues my whole life and need help” and makes it very apparent. it’s complicated to be in therapy and trying to better yourself when you’re convinced that you don’t deserve better things!

but once he does get to that level it’s allllll about the coping mechanisms. very much giving “no i don’t care where my self esteem issues came from how to i FIX IT?” he gets told his braggadocio stems from overcompensation for his perceived shortcomings and he’s like “YEAH? DUH???? how do i start calling myself awesome and believe myself when i say it?” also maybe once he’s processed and progressed enough he gets a bit transgender with it who knows ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

hunk: he was already considering therapy for his anxiety before the war so like. this has been needed for a WHILE. his anxiety has gotten both worse and better. worse because he’s always looking out for a surprise attack and better because he knows his limits a lot better than he did and is like “well. if that guy who looks shifty DID stab me, i’d know how to deal with that! just like on planet naenov that one time”

in therapy he asks plenty of questions about the specific limitations of doctor patient confidentiality before absolutely oversharing. diane learns more about keith in hunk’s sessions than keith’s for a while. there’s a period where hunk is more worried about how well they’re doing than his own well-being and has to keep himself from breaking THEIR doctor patient confidentiality. there’s also him knowing she can’t and won’t share what he says so he vents about petty stuff in side tangents every five minutes

allura: “how am i supposed to be queen of an entire planet i feel bad telling pidge what to do when she’s tired” and other such questions. allura is overjoyed to have a new altea, but she’s terrified about ruling it wrong. it’s self esteem issues AND anxiety! what fun! there’s also the general grief of old altea and all she’s lost, but that comes with so much survivor’s guilt too. she knows she was raised to rule one day and believes in fate enough to trust in herself being the one to survive the war, but still. a lot on her plate.

there’s also the fact that she treats her therapy like a new religion. “you know how to fix me so i will do anything you say. i’ll kill someone for you. i’ve killed before actually, did i tell you that? i can’t not forget the life draining out of his eyes…. anyway, i’ll do whatever you say if it means no more nightmares.”

coran: he’s dealing with everything allura’s processing, plus the fact that he was her rock the entire time. he made himself available to the whole team as a shoulder to cry on, but he didn’t have anyone in return. he jumps at the chance to go to therapy because he’ll FINALLY have an outlet outside of his brain

he happy shares every detail with his therapist, but intersperses every sad memory with some of the most batshit insane stuff anyone’s ever done because they often happened one after the other. real sentences coran has said in therapy: “yes, i had killed someone long before this war. i’ve been in others, but never like this. i tell you, seeing these kids lose their innocence so quickly yet so gradually… it rocked me to my core…. but! it reminds me of when i first killed a man. funny story, actually.”

also fun fact. therapists sometimes have to go to therapy themselves for all the stuff they deal with and stories they hear from patients. diane is also in therapy; why she chose to see all seven of them, she’ll never know

[sheepkebby]

What do you think Keith's dynamic would be with the other survivors if he were in the Savanna group?

I THINK ABOUT THIS ALL THE TIME-

Keith and Ellis are obviously best friends, and they can never shut the hell up when they're together. They're constantly talking, laughing, singing, just straight up having the best time ever. The others absolutely get double the amount of usual headaches, but at the very least they're glad to see Ellis is so happy to be talking to his buddy again. Plus, there's a lot more light in the group now that Keith and Ellis are bright balls of sunshine together. It's hard not to be optimistic about your chances when two of your teammates are constantly shouting WOOOOOO LET'S FUCKING GOOOOOOOO

(Also everyone can definitely tell that Ellis and Keith are crushing on each other, and it melts everyone's hearts to see two idiots tiptoe around their feelings for each other like the stupidest ballerinas ever) ((#Kellis for life))

Keith and Rochelle would be absolutely adorable together. Ro treats Ellis as if he were a little brother and Keith is no different. Though, she'd probably treat Keith more like a muddy stray dog she found out in the rain one night. Rochelle thinks Keith is stupid and funny and she loves how he gives Nick noogies. Keith immediately takes a liking to Rochelle and wants to impress her with his stupid stunts. He's about to do a backflip off a cliff and he's like "RO!!! HEY RO ARE YOU WATCHING?? RO! WATCH!!! WATCH ME THIS IS GONNA BE AWESOME!!"

Keith and Coach would be interesting, I think. I mean the obvious choice for a dynamic would be Coach going Dad Mode and being a sort of father figure to Keith, and honestly? I do like the idea, but I also feel like Keith and Coach would be BEST FRIENDS❗❗ Like, they both like rock music and sports and tasty food, they're both Big Boys™ with Big Hearts™ and I bet they'd have tons more in common. I can see them tossing a ball around in the yard before going inside to scarf down the biggest hamburgers anyone's ever seen. Then they stay up late laughing loud as fuck over jokes only southerners would get, and they accidentally keep the entire saferoom awake.

Keith and Nick would have the most fun dynamic in my opinion- Nick has already grown a tolerance for stupid countryfolk after spending so much time with Ellis, but he immediately recognizes that Keith is way more of a bastard than Ellis is. He audibly goes "ugghh" whenever Keith enters the room. The rest of the group has already made it very clear that they won't tolerate Nick's bitchiness if it's genuinely mean-spirited (lighthearted teasing is ok) so Nick isn't allowed to bully Keith as much as he'd like to. Keith, on the other hand, absolutely LOVES bullying Nick. He'll ruffle Nick's hair and wipe his dirty hands on Nick's sleeve just because it's funny. Despite their differences, Keith will openly admit he enjoys spending time with Nick because he's a total badass (and it's funny to tease him, Keith doesn't mean any harm by it anyways). Nick will try and convince everyone that he hates Keith with every fiber of his being, and everyone's like "sure Nick", because they know he was lying when he said he hated Ellis, and he's definitely lying again.

[prettyboysmlm]

11, 15, 25, 35, 50, 42? (I picked random numbers) hehehe distraction <3

-🥄??

ugh. go eat.

11. favorite thing to do on a rainy day? hm if it’s just raining, then either sleep or draw while watching youtube. if its storming then i’ll hide in my bed with puggles and watch smth to distract me lol

15. your love language? physical affection definitely. both ways. i’m very touch starved to the point that a physical representation would be a disintegrating skeleton.

25. most attractive part of the human body? the eyes. no matter what color, they’re always the prettiest part of a person to me. tits also

35. have you ever had a near-death experience? if you count me being an idiot and ramming my temple into the corner of my bedside cabinet while playing with my dog, as well as the fact that i can’t even look at a bottle of benadryl without my heart racing, then yes, i have

50. do you believe in ghosts? yeah, i’ve seen enough shit to believe in them and be scared of them for the most part. probably doesn’t help that the main college i’m looking at is in the most haunted town in america lol

42. ever crushed on a cartoon character? bitch i only ever crush on cartoon characters. they are the most ideal fucked up versions of what i’m looking for in a man. honorable mentions include kristoph gavin, keith and lotor from vld, lio fotia, victor nikiforov, and professors palladium and avalon. also the only girls i’ve ever crushed on, rosalina from mario galaxy, franziska von karma, and grelle from black butler

[the-most-lamentable]

finish the murder mystery i double dog dare you. are there any fun facts or lil details that you couldn't fit in and/or are totally irrelevant but definitely exist nonetheless?

>:( well now I gotta finish it

Random shit that was cut, didn't make it, etc:

James and Keith live in Croydon since getting out of prison in small and very cluttered flat.

James had been homeschooling as a kid to keep up with his father's show schedule, rip to his education it was very neglected. Could he tell you about the war of 1812? Absolutely not but he can infodump about cardistry for hours on end.

The Bullet Catch has gone through like 4 different interactions including; scooby doo sort of armor that almost beheaded someone, a civil war canon that fires, narrowly missed because he saw a coin and tried to grab it, and one other I can't recall.

An exchange cut for pacing sake in Shock Blanket for 2 was the paramedic congratulating James for having the weirdest overdose she's had to help, he asks if he gets a prize and she gave him a sticker of a gecko.

Kevin's sister mentioned in epilogue is the most aggressively boring woman ever. Whole wardrobe of khaki suits. They are such wildly different people but they send post cards back and forth about their escapades (Kev sends one about his hospital visit after a failed stunt, she sends one back about office drama at Bethanys baby shower)

Additionally Kevin's accent got cut down, he's got a natural southern cadence usually buried under Generic American that turns up when stressed.

Bär is the reason Kevin lost his arm but it was an accident, probably. Throughout the show they had a contentious relationship as Kev used her utter lack of English to vent his frustrations onto her because she couldn't understand a word of it. In return she accidentally stabbed him on more that one occasion, impaled both hands, and accidentally shot his arm off. Kevin subsequently considered them even.

Mickey is a major fan of 90s boybands, which sadly doesn't come up.

Eugenia has a labyrinth for a backyard, full out hedge maze. Sadly doesn't come up cause of Locked Room Mystery. Additionally her house is full of fucking wild shit like there's a scrapped room that's just wall to wall accursed taxidermy beasts with a Bär Bear joke.

Finale was originally going to have one of those medieval torture things with the swinging axe that slowly descends, you know the one, then a saw trick that was also cut.

When a Door Closes was originally titled Secret Tunnel?

Most of the specifically named curiosities are things me or my relatives own such as my aunts umbrella stand full of swords.

A good chunk of stunts and magic tricks in there are things that I myself tested to make sure it made sense mechanically. This included me convincing my best friend to ties me up and time my escape, or pulling from my own experience drowning for the scuba stunt. Likewise Kevs aside about walking 4 blocks to 7 11 in a hurricane because he ran out of coffee is something I did, it was pretty bad coffee but I got a donut so.

James has no idea what his exact birthday is, his father just guesstimated a date. The only holdover he has from his mother is his first name. Fun fact his middle name is Aleksi, also not relevant. Either way he never really celebrated birthdays growing up (unlike his sisters who got their own parties each year), also based on personal life RIP.

Of the two times James has been arrested they learned to just zipcuff him as whenever they turned around he'd be out of the handcuffs. He figured out how to get out of the zip cuffs too (also something I tested, well prior when working a show where we somehow stole a pair of police handcuffs for a prop and I got handcuffed to a table right before a cue and had to learn escapology Very Quickly)

The Blades record for breath holding is 7 minutes drowned accidentally, 4.22 when not drowned. (Mine is 3.37 suck it houdini)

Here's the Playlist btw, each song correlates to chapters in order and boy howdy can I infodump about my song choices for that one https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5CgZY3wghYlxw15pruHBow?

[casspurrjoybell-30]

Cry Me a River - Chapter 25 - Part 1

*Warning Adult Content*

"I am not alone because loneliness is always with me."

Luna

"Did he drink enough? He could be dehydrated," a nervous voice spoke above me.

"Keith get him some water."

A grumble filled the room followed by harsh footsteps walking away.

I opened my eyes slowly, vision slightly hazy as blurred figures peered down at me.

"How are you feeling, love?"

'Alastair.'

"W-what happened?"

I tried to sit up but a hand stopped me.

"Don't sit up yet. We don't want you fainting."

The voice was too soft to be Alastair's.

I turned to a furry-browed blond.

"Michael?"

I looked around at the familiar sterile, white room.

"Yes?"

"Why am I in your office?"

'What happened to the picnic in the garden? Why is my head spinning?'

"You fainted, love," Alastair's soothing voice filled my ears as he peered down at me, eyes filled with nerves, hand shaking against my arm.

'Why is he shaking?'

"We think you may be dehydrated."

My head turned towards Michael as he spoke.

His arms were crossed.

A clear sign of annoyance.

'At me?'

He turned towards Alastair.

"How could you not have made sure he drank?"

Alastair pulled his hand from my arm, running his shaking fingers through his black hair.

Keith made his presence known as he stomped his way back into the room, cup in hand.

"Would you stop acting like you're five?" Michael demanded as he pulled the cup from Keith's hand, almost spilling the contents onto the floor.

Keith grumbled on how what he had done the night before was most definitely not something a five-year-old knew how to do.

A statement which caused Michael's face to flush before pushing the cup into Alastair's hand.

"Make sure he drinks the whole thing," he declared before yanking Keith by the ear and dragging him out the door.

"God, they just don't know when to stop with their lover's quarrels," Alastair sighed.

I wasn't quite sure what to say to that so I remained silent.

'Was it normal for lovers to fight as much as Michael and Keith do?'

"Don't worry, love."

Alastair brushed my hair from my face as his hand rested on my upper back, pulling me up slowly and bringing the cup to my lips.

"They fight like cats and dogs by day and fucking make love like bunnies by night. From what I've observed, Keith enjoys riling Michael up. He had once told me that make-up sex with Michael was the best kind of sex," he laughed.

Though I didn't find it funny.

Not at all.

Why would one purposely want to fight with their lover?

Surely that was twisted, was it not?

I began to sip from the cup as Alastair continued.

"They have had a bit of a strange relationship, those two, for as long as I can remember."

'Strange relationship?'

"Keep drinking, love."

I hadn't realized that I had stopped drinking.

He tipped the cup a bit more and I finished the cup with one last gulp.

I felt a drop of water fall from my lips as Alastair leaned down and licked it from my chin.

My face heated up as he pulled from my chin with a small smile.

"Are you feeling better now, love?"

I nodded, not trusting my voice to speak.

I felt a warm hand on mine.

"River, you have to tell me if you ever feel dizzy or nauseous again. Never hold back how you feel. Don't keep things from me," his hand squeezed mine a little too tight.

I flinched.

He pulled away with an apology on his lips.

'Don't keep things from me.'

☽✹☾