#what i am saying is they now take better care of themselves and each other

[kindred-spirit-93]

penelope canonically retreating to her room and refusing food = she puts on some weight, the reason being both lack of physical activity as well as her body being on constant emergency mode (so what little she does eat ends up being stored away bc the body doesnt know when the 'starvation' will end). whats more her constant stress elevates cortisol levels which in and of itself leads to weight gain esp in the abdominal area.

tl;dr chubby penelope send fucking t w e e t

[threeacttragedy]

Entry 2 – The One About the Likes

As you will soon figure out, I will be bouncing around from topic to topic. It will all be Lukola-related, of course, but the information and speculation I discuss may not be in any particular order. However, I will add in dates of reference to help organize your thoughts.

In my first post, I mentioned our three fan-types. Because this is only my second entry, I will touch on them again.

The Sincerely Ignorant are those that follow blindly. We all know a Sincerely Ignorant. If you’re the type of person who spirals uncontrollably at the hint of bad news, I’m sorry to tell you this, you’re likely a Sincerely Ignorant. But, don’t run! I want to help calm you the fuck down.

The Conscientiously Stupid are the people who push a narrative without considering other evidence being provided to them. We’re all Conscientiously Stupid from time to time, but this category – at least in my blog – is typically reserved for the Jakholes, the A-Holes, the Anti-Lukes, and now apparently the Anti-Nics. That’s not to say Lukolas are not also Conscientiously Stupid. We are human after all.

The Fact Finders are those that collect information and share it. They may speculate on it, but they do not manipulate it. We simply argue our case and provide the evidence in support of our arguments.

Now jumping into what I wanted to discuss today –

The likes.

The motherfucking likes on Instagram.

My disclaimer today: I am only discussing the likes between Nicola and Luke in this post; however, I will use a third party to put things into perspective. This is intentional. The “adjacent” (I hate that word, by the way) likes are a separate post all on their own – but I’ll summarize it for you because, on the surface (speculation aside), it’s quite black and white. Jake likes Nicola’s posts; Nicola likes Jake’s posts; Antonia likes Luke’s posts; Luke likes Antonia’s posts. Let the meltdowns begin.

Done?

Okay. Back to the likes between Nicola and Luke…

It’s the same old song and dance.

Every.

Single.

Time.

Nicola post to her grid.

Jake likes it within a small timeframe.

Luke – maybe he likes it, maybe he doesn’t.

The Conscientiously Stupid attack and the Sincerely Ignorant spiral. And the Fact Finders take a deep breath and prepare themselves to walk the Sincerely Ignorant back on board the USS Lukola. I’m mean, it’s exhausting for everyone.

Do Luke’s likes really matter? No, in most instances, they don’t.

Do Jake’s likes really matter? Same as above! No, in most instances, they don’t.

Let’s take Nicola’s BFF JVN for example. He usually likes Nicola’s posts, right? In fact, some days, he’s just as fast as Jake. And, what about Dylan Brady? Talk about a friend who puts an instant-like on Nicola’s posts! And, another thing – both JVN and Dylan have been known to repost Nicola’s stuff to their own stories. However, no one cares about that or considers any of these “side characters” because they’re not Luke or Jake. I get it. But, let’s consider a few things.

First, JVN has liked most of Nicola’s posts except for the “NY Rats” one [which I will not speculate about right now]. But, let’s use the “NY Rats” post as a reference point. Nicola posted that October 17. Did you know that JVN has posted 14 times on his own grid since then? And, did you know that Nicola has only liked two of those 14? Holy shit, they must despise each other, right? Or, is it more likely that (a) Nicola is busy or (b) so close to JVN she doesn’t feel the need to like every single one of his posts? Now, I want you to answer this question with all honesty: Based on this information, do you have any concerns about Nicola’s relationship with JVN? If you answered yes, why?

Now let’s consider this next part, which is in the same vein as the above. Did you know that Nicola has liked most of Luke’s grid posts? Did you know that out of the last 14 posts made by Nicola to her grid, Luke has only liked eight? That’s barely over half (but, hey, better than Nicola’s average with JVN!). If you go back even further, you’ll find this is Luke’s modus operandi. He doesn’t like every goddamn post Nicola throws up.  Even throughout the World Tour, he wasn’t liking all of Nicola’s posts. Did this bother you then? Is it possible Luke is (a) not that into social media, (b) busy, or (c) so close to Nicola he doesn’t feel the need to like every single one of her posts? Let me ask you the same question I asked above: Based on this information, do you have any concerns about Luke’s relationship with Nicola? If you answered yes, why?

Okay, I’m going to assume some people are bothered by this Luke-Like bit so let’s keep discussing it for a moment.

Did you know that since January 1, 2024, Nicola has made nine IG grid posts that relate to a political viewpoint? Did you know that Luke has only liked one of those nine posts? In fact, I was quite shocked that Luke liked Nicola’s October 15 post of her Time100 speech (if you haven’t watched her speech, it’s on her IG grid). In my opinion, Luke liking this post is far more significant than Luke liking, say, her third grid post about her Time cover. He’s seemingly agreeing with her political stance.

This was a change in modus operandi. A small change, indeed, but interesting.

[maythedreadwolftakeyou]

idk man been sifting through my feelings on all this. and i think what it comes down to is i don't really care/mind that there are non-canonical (BY DEFINITION, if it is not IN the media, it is not in the 'canon', and this info was in tweets) statements about Lucanis' sexuality being demi/ace/him being a virgin. and i'm glad for people who like to incorporate that into their headcanons about the game/interpretation of his character and expand on that more than the game itself does, like, this is our space now baby do what makes you happy!

but personallyyyyyyy i just do not think these new labels are some magic bandaid that solves the flaws in the pacing and writing of his romance. Lucanis never talking to Rook about his feelings as they get to know each other (but sure is willing to talk to Rook about his feelings for Neve if you don't romance him) is not solved, for me, by saying "well he wouldn't be attracted until he got to know you and also has no experience with sex". the same way calling it a "slow burn" did not solve this for me. especially because right up until release he was being advertised as a "bisexual mess". but now was secretly a "panromantic demisexual" the whole time. it just... idk. you can say anything you want online, you know? but if you don't Show Me... well. i also don't like that people who are saying 'well this was Not part of his story in the game so i don't see it' are getting labeled as anti-ace when like, many of the criticisms i am seeing are coming from people who are themselves demi/ace lol. it's not asexual representation bc it is not in the game itself. (though honestly. i AM glad that that was not jammed into his story arc, and that his quests were about his agonizing over his family and the fact that he's now bodysharing with a demon. because his writing was never going to get MORE lines, and to take away any of the ones he had to put in a sexuality arc beyond an offhand mention would have really crashed that because the existing writing barely holds together as is. like there just was not room to have more so personally i am not criticizing Mary Kirby for her decision not to add it. but you can't not add something and then also claim it's a definitive part of his character. plus i dont think a character needs to know/understand/use modern labels anyway).

and personally i DO prefer an awkward/fumbling Lucanis, to be clear. Before Veilguard came out I was never expecting the sexy antivan lover angle because we got that once already: Zevran. I didn't want poor-imitation Zevran, and bioware would not write Lucanis like that to make sure he is a more distinct character anyway. BUT i do think it's reasonable in a bioware game to expect that a romance is going to have romantic content--and the number of times after his cutscenes i literally said aloud "go girl give us nothing" after he failed to react to a flirt was pretty sad. If he's awkward and nervous give him a line where he stutters and doesn't know how to react, not just a blank stare and back to business, or whatever. Or a scene where you can literally ask "you never respond to my flirting do you want me to stop" and for him to say say he likes it but doesn't know how to reciprocate or. ANYTHING. Idk. I have seen 10 different posts/takes on how the Wall Lean Scene fits in, be it that he was imitating a romance novel or it was crow seduction training or he was just pretending because that's how he's seen Illario do it but at the end of the day. It is all just speculation because nothing in the game EVER addresses how wildly different the tone of that scene is from every other one of his romance scenes. And as much as i love the Sexy Wall Lean, given the rest of his characterization in EVERY other romance scene, i think I'm at a point where i think the romance would have been better served by cutting it out and having a different scene where you actually get to talk to him instead.

but! that is not the game we were given. we only have what we have, which is the Veilguard content by Mary Kirby, and The Wigmaker Job written by Courtney Woods (where for reference, he mentions stumbling into an orgy on a previous job, and having an "interesting" time getting out of that, so i already think we have 2 different interpretations of his character between them anyway). but yeah idk man to me "well he's ace" is not an excuse for either gaps in the writing or cut content or whatever was going on. because 1. HE IS NOT AN ACTUAL PERSON he is a storytelling vessel that i felt failed to satisfyingly communicate the entire romance story and 2. even if he was a person saying 'well in ace relationships communication sucks' would also be, not great, you know. everything beyond the text itself is just interpretation and headcanons

[krakenartificer]

Who wants a really sad Leverage headcanon?

Was re-watching the Gimme a K Street Job -- Season 5 Episode 5 -- and a couple of things stood out to me.

1) Nate says "Let's go steal some congresspeople", and then sends everyone on the team (except Parker, who's being a cheer coach) out to con one of their targets. But it feels like there's a profound mismatch in who gets which mark.

For the "not like other girls" feminist congresswoman who's inclined to dismiss cheer as worthless and demeaning, you need Eliot to come in looking like a man who very much knows what does and does not count as a sport, and be his tiny angry respect-women-juice self about how regardless of what you think of their choice of clothing they are working as hard as any other athlete and they deserve safety as much as anyone else. But instead they sent Hardison.

For the "Yes I am very busy and important; admire me" chairman, you need Sophie, who is better than anyone else on the planet at making you feel admirable when you're doing what she wants, and scummy and low when you're not doing what she wants. But instead they sent Eliot.

For the "Look I am trying, but I need corn subsidies or I won't be able to do anything else" newbie congressman, Hardison could happily have gone on an infinitely recurring series of fetch quests until he sees the place where they loop around and bottom out and every problem solves every other problem. But instead they sent Sophie.

2) Eliot struggles the most, so Nate works with him the most, but he doesn't help him out hardly at all; he just keeps saying, "So what's your next play?" and then revealing that he's already anticipated Eliot's next play and has all the materials in place to enact it. And of course, they do eventually get the dude on board, and it all works out, but afterwards, Eliot tells Nate, "I trust that some time soon you'll tell me why you had me slogging through all that when you already knew how to hook him."

And of course, knowing what we now know about how season 5 ends, it makes sense that Nate is trying to train the OT3 to work without him, looking for his replacement.

Except.

If the plan is to fuck off into the sunset with Sophie, then why did he throw Sophie into this uncomfortable not-my-wheelhouse scenario?

No, Nate's preparing the entire team to carry on without him. He's forcing them to learn how to plan, learn different ways of approaching problems, to think about bigger pictures and approach them strategically.

...

I think Nate just got the first diagnosis of the disease that's finally going to kill him. And again, we -- the audience -- now know that he's going to live for many years after that initial diagnosis. But he doesn't know that, at this point. He knows he's tested positive, and he knows it's eventually going to kill him, and he has no idea how long he has.

And in some sense, it doesn't matter how long he has. Three months or thirty years, that kind of revelation makes it stunningly clear that taking care of the people you love means making sure that they can take care of themselves.

So that's what he does: he throws them into new, uncomfortable situations where they'll have to grow and support each other without him, so that no matter what happens, they'll be able to keep going. Because he's not a nice person, Jimmy Ford's son, but by God does he know the importance of protecting your family.

[knavesflames]

i have a request if it is alright and you're comfortable writing this ! arlecchino x reader who refuses to eat because they are insecure, eventually caving in for their beloved peruere, who Always has her way with words . . . that said if you do write this take your time !! i hope you have a good day <3

Hi! I struggle with this myself tbh, it’s been an ongoing struggle since I was 12/13, so if you’re feeling like this I really hope you’re alright! That being said, I hope you enjoy. I tried to make it as close to your prompt as possible!!

Word count: 985

Contents: fem!reader with implied ed, nothing graphic but she struggles poor thing, husband material peruere fr, shes deffo so soft for her gf

utc!

You have always seemed to have your own silent troubles with body image and eating. Now of course, Arlecchino noticed the day she met you. You can hide it as much as you want to, but she’s become quite aware of your little tricks, and that convincing smile. For the peace of the house, she goes along with them, for the most part. What else can she do when you refuse to admit you have an issue? She instead opts to sit with you when you eat, always snacking on something herself despite her appetite being smaller than the average person. When you attempt to distract either her or yourself from whatever meal you both have sat down to eat, a singular finger will gently tap on the side of the plate or the bowl, a small but silent indicator that she knows what you’re doing, and it isn’t working.

You were getting a little bit better for a while, but someone you hadn’t seen in a while had commented on your body and it had gone downhill from there. Since then, she has watched you with a careful eye, and of course, taken the batteries out of the scale. Arlecchino is one to silently deter you, rather than intervene and make you feel attacked. She has learned from experience that it does not help.

However, when she notices that you once again have not eaten the entire day, she realises that giving you some fruit cubes or a bowl of soup will not suffice. So, she cooks for you. The woman can cook, yes, but not anything other than salt and pepper. She cooks a bland meal, a little variation of your favourite one. She just cannot bring herself to put in the chilli flakes. She casts glances at you as you sit in the living room, noting down each detail she notices about you— the way you’ve chosen baggy clothes over the usual outfits you love to wear. The sad eyes and the way you avoid any hint of a reflection as to avoid seeing yourself. Arlecchino thinks it is so, so sad when the person she loves so dearly cannot bring themselves to love themselves too.

When Arlecchino moves to sit next to you with two plates in her hand, you already know, and you’re already prepared to refuse. Before you could open your mouth, though, the plate is placed in your hands, with one word. ‘Eat.’

You take a few small bites, enough for her eyes to stop watching you constantly. Once you think she’s calmed down, you go about your typical tricks. Yapping on about anything and everything and always attempting to distract her. It does not work this time.

“You aren’t fooling me,” she hums, tapping the ceramic plate with her nail. “I made this for you. Please try to eat it.”

You find yourself faltering at the pleading tone in her voice. Arlecchino does not plead, nor does she ask, or beg. She doesn’t seem to be Arlecchino now, though. She is not The Knave. She’s how she is when she’s alone with you, where she allows you to call her by her true name.

“Peruere, I am not hungry.” You begin, eager to appease her. Peruere is stubborn, though, and wants to hear absolutely nothing about it.

“You are, and you will eat. Please. You look miserable, and I dislike when you are miserable. Why must you suffer for beauty standards that are so unrealistic?” For once, her voice is soft instead of the harsh, cold voice you’ve grown to love. It’s different, but you can’t say you mind it.

“You say that, but you’re beautiful,” you mutter, staring at the plate in front of you. Your hand absentmindedly twirls the fork around. “It’s not the same.”

“I am tall, and I have many scars. I wear a suit. My hands are charred to the extent that they will never return to their true colour. My eyes. I do not fit the so-called standard either, but there is nothing I can do about the issue, so why would I waste my hours suffering at the hands of myself because of it? Why would you, when you are so perfect to me?”

You huff in annoyance, but purely because you know she’s hit a nerve in you, and you know she’s right. It irritates you, because you can’t seem to find a witty comeback. You look at her, and her once stoic face has worry written into her features. You see it in the way her eyebrows crease, and the way her head has tilted to the side. It’s the most emotion you’ll get out of her. You stare at her for a little longer before you cave, and while grumbling incoherently, you stab the food with the fork you’re holding (a bit aggressively), before taking a bite.

You chew for a while, longer than necessary, and she cocks an eyebrow in a silent command. You continue chewing, staring at her for a beat before she realises why you haven’t swallowed yet. She sighs gently, but takes a bite of her own and, the second she swallows, you do too. Peruere decides she’ll take what she can get, and watches as you mirror her until the food has settled into your stomach. Peruere is acutely aware of your little habits, though, and pulls you close to her so you are not able to suddenly stand up.

“You did well. You already look less tired. I do despise when you mistreat the person I love.” She mumbles into your hair, her fingers tracing lazy circles on your skin as you nuzzle into her. Peruere decides that if she has to do this with every meal, she will, because the way your eyes light up when you taste her ever so bland food warms her heart more than she’d care to admit.

[the-soliloquies-of-sadists]

#381

“Wakey wakey.  Time to wake up….  Don’t try to move around too much.  As you are realizing, you are in a predicament.  You are lying in my basement, buck naked, tied up, gagged, collared, with a fuck pillow under your pelvis.  You ain’t going anywhere, anytime soon….

“We’ve never met, but we know each other.  We both do the same thing for work, but we are nothing alike.  This is what’s happening.  I am part of a nameless organization that takes faggots, trains them to be slaves, and sells them to buyers from around the world.  From what I’ve been told over the years, the faggots delivered to me want to drop off the grid and sold into slavery.  They turn themselves in to a collector, who then has them delivered to me.  I don’t know if that’s true as I don’t let any of the faggots talk other than to say, ‘Yes Sir!’ 

“Now for you, I was told your backstory.  It seems that you are a collector for a different kind of group.  I train fags who offer themselves up for the taking.  You seem to prefer the non-consensual abductions of twelve- to fifteen-year-old girls.  I don’t care that you prefer pussy over dicks, but I do draw the line with their age.

“As I said, I was told what you are.  That never happens.  Ever.  But it appears that you approached the ten-year-old niece of one of higher ups in the organization, and he recognized what and who you were.  That stupid move brought you here. 

“I have no idea who the higher up is nor do I care.  Hell, we don’t know any of the men that are in the other parts of my organization, let alone hear from them.  So I found it surprising to get a call from a higher up—who I haven’t heard from in a few years—that I am to train you personally.  You better fucking believe that I’m going to train the fuck out of you.

“I have been training faggots for nearly forty years.  This is my farm you are on.  Twelve hundred acres.  Twelve hundred acres with some of the most advanced surveillance and anti-escape deterrents.  I know of every person who steps foot on my property, and I know if a slave is ten feet away from where it is supposed to be.  The ankle cuffs, wrist cuffs, and collar have tracking devices in them.  The collar can deliver a shock to keep you in line at a moment’s notice.  And the ankle cuffs are set up that if you go beyond a certain perimeter, a numbing agent is injected causing your legs to go numb and become useless.  Escape is not possible.  In my twenty years at this location, I have only had one slave make it off property, but it was collected within three minutes of doing so.  That slave was brought back and tortured in front of all the other slaves as a deterrent.  And that was before all the tracking technology was put in.  So keep that in mind if you decide to do something stupid.

“Now,… for the past five minutes, I have been telling you the predicament you find yourself in.  I have been watching your reaction.  Being gagged, you can’t say anything, but your body language says it all.  You seem too calm and not surprised at the description of my organization.  No reaction really.  That tells me that you are familiar with an operation like this.  When I tell you that you were collected for stalking that niece, you don’t look shocked by that accusation.  That pretty much confirms what I was told,… not that it matters otherwise. 

“No, the only reaction I saw was when I tell you that I am going to do your training.  You looked panicked.  Your eyes went right to my bulge.  Oh yeah.  I noticed.  You are straight indeed.  I should say, ‘were straight.’  From this moment on, you will never go back to that life.  The only cunt in your future is the one I’m about to make out of this hole between your legs.

“You have a great ass, so flawlessly smooth.  On any other slave, this ass would be a huge selling feature.  But for you, it’s a source of pain.  I need to put out my cigarette somewhere.  Your asscheek is the best place to do it….  Scream motherfucker scream.  Your perfect ass is going to go through some changes, from being daily whipped to being used as an ashtray.  You are going to be scarred up for sure.

“For the next part, I need to take off my boots and get out of these overalls.  You are going to get acquainted with Otto.  That’s what some of the fag slaves and some of the trainers call my dick.  Otto, it means ‘eight’ in Italian.  I’m actually closer to nine inches, but nine in Italian is ‘Nove’ which doesn’t sound right.  It doesn’t roll over the tongue as nicely as Otto.  Hehe.

“Look up at me.  Look shithead!  Here’s Otto.  Look at the cock that is going to own your life.  Half hard, it’s bigger than yours.  Keep staring at my foreskin.  Otto needs to piss.  You will be trained on drinking piss.  That’s all the liquid you will be given.  And if you are wondering if that means that you will be trained on becoming a full toilet, let me say we stopped training our slaves on that a while back.  It was too time consuming, and the buyers weren’t interested in that feature.  But for you, the higher ups want you trained.  But that will have to wait.

“Are you…  you are…!  You’re crying!  About time!  Hold still.  Let me wash away those tears for you.  Piss is the best antidote to tears.  There’s no feeling in the world like starting to tear down a once proud man by simply pissing on his face.  It’s getting me hard.  Otto likes what he’s doing to you.  But he wants action.

“Normally, you would be sucking the last few drops out of my foreskin.  But I ain’t ungagging you yet.  Besides, Otto needs to turn a virgin ass into a gaping cunt. 

“Your hole is perfectly displayed, like it’s ready to be destroyed thanks to that fuck pillow and how wide your legs were spread and secured.  Oh look.  Your cock and balls are just hanging there,… exposed,…

“…Damn! Even with my bare feet, I can deliver one hell of a ball kick.  Ha! Ha!  Your screams mean everything to me.  You know, each and every one of my personal slaves are kicked in the balls every morning.  They need to be reminded of their place on a daily basis. 

“Now, you will be spared that daily torture.  And that’s not because I would never have you as my personal slave, and don’t worry I wouldn’t own such trash.  No, I’m going to castrate you, in one of the most painful ways.  I haven’t decided how yet.  I do know that I will leave your empty sack intact.  We have a urologist that will make changes to your dick so that you lose all ability to get hard and with a few snips to the nerves in the area, all physical sensation will be gone.  Essentially your dick will constantly just hang there and be utterly useless… other than to piss out of.  Every time you reach down there, you will only feel the shell of what you used to be.

“Awww you’ve done full on sob.  Here let me collect some of your tears.  Tears of cunts are the best lube. 

“Do you feel Otto at your hole?  Feel his weight in your crack?  He’s ready to go.  Can you feel his leak.  Lucky for you, you really got me leaking.  Feel that wetness?  That’s all you.  Virgin cunt meets wine bottle thick dick.

“Don’t fucking start resisting.  Your cherry is going to be popped.  Here goes. 

“Don’t fucking fight me.  It’s only going to be more painful for you.  You are making my dick even harder.

“LET ME IN!  I’m coming in.  Oh, you got my head.  You are really starting to piss me off.

“Urg!  There.  Normally I would let a cunt relax before I begin, but you don’t fucking deserve that.  Right to the… goddamned… root!  Fuck, you’re tight.  By the end of tonight, you will be a gaping mess. 

“Not only have I been lucky to have such a big dick, but I can cum multiple times a night.  My first load is always quick, but the second one goes on for hours.  Then I have a gang bang lined up for this cunt. 

“I’ll let someone else pop the cherry in your throat.  There’s no way I’m going to let Otto near your mouth, at least not while you still have a mouthful of teeth.  Oh yeah, those will be coming out as part of your transformation.

“Keep crying.  Oh man.  Oh fuck.  I’m getting close.  You ready to be bred?  You ready to make your transformation to cunt complete?  Here it cums.  Here it goddamned cums!  Ahh! Ahh! Fuuuuck!

“Holy shit!  That was… fuck. 

“Your cunt has one of my biggest loads in it.  That should help lubricate you up a bit for round two….  Don’t try to push me out.  Otto will come out when he wants to.  Right now, he just wants a minute to catch his breath.

“Cunt, you have nothing but hell ahead of you.  There will be no let up.  Today is about breaking you in.  Tomorrow will begin your life of pain.  We have a shitload planned for you.  I don’t know how long it will be for you to with us, but each day we will strip away what made you a man, a human. 

“You know, when we put a slave up for auction, we have transformed the fag into the best slave it could be.  We don’t do it for its wellbeing.  No, we want top dollar.  And we get top dollar.  That’s our reputation.

“But for you, I was given the instruction that your transformation should be so extreme that when you are put up for auction, without a reserve price, that you are so repulsively distorted that you are sold for the lowest amount we ever had for a slave.  That shouldn’t be a problem with all the branding, scarification, tattooing, deteething, and so on.  Your previous profession will be shared with your new owners so that they can keep up your hell. “Oh fuck.  All this talk of your pathetic life is getting me hard again.  I’m ready to begin round two.  This should last a few hours.”

[flippinpancakes64]

Could you do The Cullens x Reader! Who is just a very happy and cheerful person, pretty small, and then they just get sad or teary eyed when someone calls them childish, what would be their reaction?

The Cullens with a very happy but sensitive reader

I can definitely relate to the sensitive part, but I am rather large so we'll see how good I am at portraying that

Thank you for requesting and I hope you enjoy

Edward:

He doesn’t mind that you’re smaller than him

He actually kinda likes it

And he loves your personality

It’s so bright and nice

It’s a good change of pace to hear kind and clear thoughts as opposed to mean and rude ones

Now as far as when he hears people insulting you

He doesn’t let that shit fly

Especially when you come up to him later with tears in your eyes

He is anti-bully and pro-you

He will knock a bitch out

And he does his best to reassure you that he loves you for you and that he never wants you to change ever

Alice:

All things considered, you are like her clone

Small, cheerful, peppy

Only difference is that what other people say still gets to you

Granted, she’s had over 100 years to become desensitized

But she knows the feeling

Those people calling you childish have called her that too

She tells them to back off and watch themselves

As for you, she never wants you to change

You are so vibrant and lively and fun

And if those people ever got to you and you felt that you needed to try to change yourself, she shuts that down instantly

No changing yourself to fit into society for her

One order of being your own person please

Jasper:

He loves your personality so much

It’s canon that he tends to gravitate towards people who have a positive mind because it makes him feel better

And what better person than sunlight embodied

But when you come to the lunch table one day and you look like you’re about to cry, he is ready to fight

He doesn’t actually fight tho

He knows he won’t be able to hold back and he will end up killing someone

He loves you, but not enough to blow their whole cover and to reset all of his progress

He reassures you that he doesn’t think you’re childish

If anything, everybody else is just miserable

Rosalie:

Grumpy and sunshine relationship dynamic?

She likes to give you a hard time sometimes, pretending to be annoyed at how energetic you are

But in reality she loves it

She’s so used to Edward being miserable and everyone at school being miserable that she loves your personality

And she does fight someone

When you come over after school and look like you’re about to cry, she instantly takes her earrings out

She finds whoever said it and beats their ass

She will not let anyone upset you like that ever again

Emmett:

Your personality is a nice change from Rosalie’s

Not that he would admit that

But it’s nice to have someone who actually acts happy all the time

You’re his little ray of sunshine and he loves you

And when you come up to him about to cry, he gets ready to kill someone

And then he actually does

The guy deserved it idk

They can’t trace it back to him so it’s all ok

He reassures you as much as you need that he loves you and that he never wants you to change

Esme:

Another ray of sunshine

She’s so inviting and kind, you two match each other perfectly

Only she’s never really had to deal with anyone calling her childish

She’s of course had the random soccer mom asking her if she’s really qualified to be caring for a bunch of teenagers, but that’s it

So when you come home crying, she’s not too sure of what to do

She does her best to comfort you

Cue your favorite food, movie, and blanket

She spends the whole night cuddling with you and telling you that you are perfect exactly as you are

Carlisle:

He appreciates a nice, positive person

He deals with a lot of rude people at work, so it’s good to unwind

He has never once thought of you as childish in any way

One day you’re visiting him in the clinic and a random man says that you’re far too childish to be dating the doctor

He’s shocked

And you’re upset

He takes you back to his office to calm down and pages the secretary to kick that guy out

Reassures you that you are not childish and that he never wants you to change

Vampire! Bella:

She’s been around sunshine people for a long time

Her mom, Alice, Esme, and Edward when he gets what he wants

So your presence is nothing new

But she appreciates it nonetheless

She loves how you can find the good in everything

It balances out her bleak mindset

So when she sees someone insult you, she’s irate

She goes over to them and like stomps on their foot or something

And then tells them to never even look at you again

Ultimate bodyguard

[starsaroundsaturn]

12 small ways to be knightly

when I was a smol child I wanted nothing more than to go out and be a knight and change the world. now that I am a slightly more grown child I have realized I can still be a knight by changing the world in little ways. I do not actually think these things are small in impact, they are just easy to do. the starred (*) options are especially low in cost for those who don't have much money to spare!

keep money on you to give to people who need it. like a $1 bill could keep somebody from starving to death. $10 will buy a gym membership so they can shower and be clean. $20 will make sure they can travel to a shelter without hitchhiking (which is so dangerous.)

donate blood. you can keep up to 3 people alive from 1 donation. you can fight the dangerous beast that is cancer, save someone during their surgery, etc.*

plant a plant on your porch, balcony, etc. it's good for the bees and it will probably make a passerby smile.*

give money to a homeless shelter or food bank! you would be surprised what $5 can do for a person! (do your research, though, make sure this shelter or food bank does what it says it will!)

start a small free library. this just involves getting a box that you can put outside and putting books in it and labeling it as a free library! you can get used books at a thrift store for less than $2 each and make sure that books are accessible to people around you!

reach out to someone you think might be struggling in your life. this can make all the difference to a person and can save lives.*

smile at people you meet.*

sincerely thank the people who help you throughout your life, like the barista who gets you coffee, the person who brings your mail, a teacher, etc.*

give someone you love a hug.*

keep your space clean and treat yourself with respect and care. (a knight takes care of themselves and their possessions!)*

have faith the world can get better.*

adopt an animal rather than buying one. so many animals have been abandoned and hurt, and you can give them a new home.

if you have other ways to be knightly, please add! if you want to build a community of knights with me who go about righting wrongs in the smallest of ways, please interact!

chivalry is not dead as long as we keep it alive inside us.

[ninyard]

i am in my renee and andrew besties 4eva era rn (when am i not honestly..) and was wondering if u have any headcanons u’d like to share about them? <3 i love ur brain dude!!

Here’s something:

After thanksgiving, when Andrew has returned from Easthaven, he invites Renee for a sparring session. Renee agrees, and everyone tells her to be careful, that he’s different, that he’s unmedicated and scary and if she thinks she’s in danger she needs to yell for help. She thanks them for their concern with a tight smile and tries to hold back an unfortunately bitter eye roll when her back turns to them. Her and Andrew find their way to wherever it is they usually spar - an empty room? A parking lot?

But when they get there, Andrew doesn’t start. He usually does, with some annoying move that almost always trips her up, but this time he stands in front of her with this blank and bored look in her eyes.

Are you okay? She thinks, but she knows she can’t say it out loud.

The thing about Renee and Andrew, in my opinion, why they work, is they each can recognise themselves in each other. Renee can read Andrew better than he probably thinks that she can, and she gathered a lot about his past purely from insinuations and little comments made here and there. I don’t think she knew who Drake was, but when she heard what happened, and she heard foster father, and she heard Luther’s name mentioned, she knows exactly what the history is there. Andrew doesn’t open up to her like he does to Bee or Neil, but he does share with her the scrapings off the top of his story. When she shared her past with him, she saw the look in his eyes, the shadow that passed over his gaze, and knew what had happened to him. She knew what his questioning meant, the curiosity he held over the things she'd been through. The pieces fit together perfectly, in her opinion, the pieces that told her exactly why Andrew trusted her so much once she'd told him.

“Good or bad?” Renee asks him. She’s talking about Easthaven, his time there, but he doesn’t quite catch on. He rolls his wrist in a circular motion to gesture for her to continue. “The hospital.”

“Bad,” he says. “They weren’t very good at their jobs.”

Renee feels her heart in her throat at his monotonous and unemotional delivery. She also sees that look in his eyes again, this time unsheltered and unprotected by the cloud of medicated mania that usually covered it up.

“Power trip or opportunity?” She asks.

She knows all too well how it feels to be poorly treated by medical staff or authorities as someone who frequently ran into both in her youth. Andrew seems to understand her question, and runs his finger over the lightly raised outline of a knife beneath his arm bands.

"Both and neither." Andrew says. His eyes are tired, and for just a moment Renee finds herself almost... startled? For just a moment, it feels as if she is looking into the eyes of a stranger, stood in front of him, with no smile on his face and no wild look in his eyes. Renee realises that she's never seen Andrew like this before.

“Do you want to talk about it?” She asks, as she’s prepping herself or tying up her hair. She notices how he hesitates.

Andrew doesn’t say anything, but still he doesn’t pursue the start of a fight. He doesn’t step forward to start the session, so Renee doesn’t start either.

“I get it, if you wanted to,” Renee offers, and Andrew looks at her, and his face says I’m not sure that you do. “I know you’ll talk to Betsy. I’m just offering an ear if you need to get anything off your chest.”

“Are you against killing medical professionals?” He says as he shakes himself out to take position. Renee smiles as she matches him.

“I’m against killing anybody these days,” she laughs. “But no, not if they deserved it. Keep that one between us.”

They fight for a while, but Andrew runs out of energy slightly quicker than usual. Renee wishes she could see something in him, some answer, some feeling now that his feelings were finally his own again, but each time she catches his eyes she is only met with this vast emotionless void. Renee naively hopes that with each step he takes, each fist he throws, that maybe he will finally be angry. Looking at him, knowing what he'd been through, imagining what had happened in Easthaven, she wishes he would scream and curse the world for the way it had treated him. It was a thought born from the old Renee, that much was clear. A thought founded in spite and revenge, born from fiery resentment and anger. Renee thinks Andrew deserves to kill each and every person who has felt entitled to him and his body. She would tuck her cross necklace beneath her blouse and go to confession afterwards, but she also knows she'd be right there with him.

[virq-qgo]

Can you give please do SFW and NSFW alphabet head canons for Logan (Wolverine)

Hi!! I am so sorry that it took me this long to finish..! I’ve actually never heard of alphabet head cannons so I had to find some templates and couldn’t find an SFW so please forgive me 🙁🙏 I would also like to apologize that I’m terrible at making head cannons, because I don’t have the mindset of that.. so this will probably be my first and last time I’ll do this 😞

Requests are still open ❤️

Warnings: smut, fem reader, my writing, not proof read obvi.. I also kinda rushed the end so I’m sorry 😢

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Very caring, now matter how old he is gets. Logan will make sure to give you the best treatment of your life. Literally the definition of princess treatment.

After getting the dick pounded out of you, with all of these marks on your poor worn out body. Logan will kiss each mark then pick you up and carry you to the bathroom. Like nobody talks about it so i fucking will, Logan will sit you on the toilet and make sure you piss. Why? Your handsome lover wants you to be healthy! No UTIs or yeast infection for the princess (speaking from experience.) Then you both will have a very relaxing shower together before cuddling in bed!

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Logans favorite part of his body will probably be his chest, mainly his abs. He knows how much you love them, and how much you like doing other things with them. Not to mention he works hard for his body to look the way it does, it’s something everyone should be proud of.

Now realistically, Logan will tell you that he loves every single inch of you. Yknow how you ask your parents who’s the favorite sibling, they’ll tell you they love each and single one of you, but make it so obvious that they favor the other one. Yeah, this is how it is. Except yknow he loves your hips. With the way he always grabs them, either from moving you to the side or moving you when your leg get to sore from riding him. Logan just loves how they feel in his hands.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

As a man would, Logan loves to fill your sweet pussy with his cum. And once in a while, cuming on your tits when he’s fucking his hand. But again, mainly you cunt. He’ll fill it up as much as he please and once you’re both finished, he loves to pull away and admire how much cum drips out of your hole and onto the bed. He loves his little stuffed donut.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Logan definitely fucked his hand when you were asleep, taking your dirty underwear from the floor and fucked that too. Not one of his proudest moments. But when your moaning his name and stirring in your sleep, he couldn’t help himself.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Bro is over 200 years old, please shoot me if you ever met someone who says that this man is a virgin. Because they are lying to you and themselves.

But that saying, in these 200 years, he’s had plenty of sexual partners. That means more experience and the better your pussy gets dicked down.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Logan loves when you’re on top of him. Why? Well, this is the perfect view for him. He loves the way your tits bounce and if you have small girls, he loves seeing them. He loves boobs, Logan is definitely a boob man! But he loves grabbing your hips and since he’s so much stronger than you, he moves your hips back and forth. Logan loves when your nails dig into his chest when you’re on top of him, and he LOVES watching your face while his dick is going deep into you.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He is not silly turning sex, Logan finds this time most serious. Durning these moments, he completely loses himself and only focuses on you and your pleasure. So really, he has no time for goofiness, and too him, any man who’s goofy durning sex. A time where you solely focus on your lover and their needs. Is not a man, but a boy. Because every woman who’s being intimate with a man deserves to be treated like a queen.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Now you see the mans face and head, it’s nothing but hair. The whole guy is hairy, and if you’re not into hairy men. Well Logan is not for you. He grooms his face and hair but leaves everything untouched because it’s just so unnecessary to him. That being said, he has never trimmed downstairs, and won’t plan to. Plus he knows how much you’re into that thick happy trail of his.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Logan during intimacy is very loving, he finds the moment where they’re but so vulnerable towards each other. Logan finds being intimate a very serious thing.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

If you aren’t around then yes, he needs to find a way to relieve his boner. Just the thought of you makes him so unbelievably hard. So when you’re away and he thinks of you, he can’t help himself. I like to believe that you guys have toys in the bedroom, so he definitely uses your vibrators to get done.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

So, bud definitely has a few!! Like I said in previous, he loves your boobs, that being said he’s definitely into Breast play. His hands will always be on your boobs, playing with your nipples, sucking on your nipples. Marking them up.

Another one Logan has is orgasm play, now I feel like that he will only do this when you’re not “behaving” such as making him jealous, purposefully pissing him off, yada yada you get the jist. Logan will make sure you sexy time is one of the most miserable times for you, basically saying that you don’t get to cum, he’ll drag it out on and on until he feels like you deserve it.

I am a firm believer that Logan will steal your panties from the night before. He knows where he threw them at while ripping them off you, he knows just how wet they were during that time. So obviously, he’s gonna use them to jerk himself off.

Finally, one of the last ones Logan has it’s degrading. Either he’s degrading or you, he’s so into it. Especially during a rough night, he loves to call you his dirty slut, his slutty little girl. The famous “you’re such a fucking cumslut, wanting me to always fill the tight pussy of yours up. Don’t worry, I’ll fill it up, so nice and full.”

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Whenever he gets hard, Logan will drag you to a closed off space and pull your pants to your to your knees, and push your panties to the side. He doesn’t care, he’ll take you right then and there. Logan is just always so horny for you, but can you blame him? His girlfriend is so fucking hot.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Boobs, your boobs to be exact.

Show a little bit of cleavage, well sister. You better be ready for the outcome. Logan will make it so obvious that he’s staring. It’s kinda embarrassing, especially when you’re around other people.

Another thing that gets him going is when you talk back to people, putting them in their place. He finds the bossy and demanding side of you so fucking sexy. He sometimes acts bratty just to see that side of you.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Anything that will physically harm you, he doesnt care if you’re into it. It’s a big no. He also won’t share, so no threesomes. He finds it’s disrespectful and a little hurtful that you’ll want another person into the game, making him think that he’s not giving you enough or not making you feel good.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Definitely depends on his mood or day.. but mainly I think he likes to focus on your pleasure, so he’ll definitely eat you out. Especially when he’s pissed off with something, he just wants to bury his head into your thighs and eat his meal.

But he also loves when you give him head, he asks for it almost all the time. It’s the best thing ever, just to feel how talented you are with your tongue and mouth.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Logan definitely goes fast and rough, it’s how you like it too. The both of you think it’s the best way to do it, especially since Logan has so much stamina and strength. The way his cock hits all the way back.

But of course, there are times where you guys take it slow. Showing to each other just how much you truly love one another.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

He loves them, when you both are horny but don’t have the time to take your time. It’s super convenient. He doesn’t care where or what time it is, he will pull down your pants and fuck you.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

I don’t think he’s cares all too much about being risky. As long as he knows he’s in a spot with you that no one will see, you two will be fine.

You see, he doesn’t care if anyone saw him fucking you. He just knows that your worried people will see, so he takes cover for you.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Logan can probably go as many as five, I know once he fucks you till his balls are quite literally empty and can’t go anymore because he’s too sensitive. That’s when you take you chance because that when he’s gets all subby. Enjoy your time 😉

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Yes!! He loves using toys just to be mean to you, he knows your favorite vibrator, sets in on the highest setting and places it directly on your clit, enjoying the way your hips flinch back.

Logan also likes using toys on himself, especially fleshlights that feel exactly like you. Or using your vibrator on himself.

Overall, toys are a big yes!

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Logan loves to tease you, when it comes to public and barely touching you in your most sensitive areas or sending you dirty texts. (I am a firm believer that he would send you dick picks or send you pictures of his abs, flaunting the v-line you love so much.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

His sounds are quiet but loud enough for you to hear, he moans in your ear when he’s on top of you. Or when you’re on top of him, he lets out small quieter moans. Logan gets louder when he’s closing to cumming too.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Logan’s favorite outfit on you that will get him so unbelievably horny is a pair of sweats and a tight shirt. Gets him so hard, and an instant way to get nutted in.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Okay, let’s be so for real..

Logan ripped, we know what the v-line is like! We all know that he’s hairy downstairs, but you don’t care. Because all what matters is that dick serves you good.

Logan is more of a grower than a shower. When he’s hard, he grows to be 7 to 8 inches. He’s not that thick, but big enough to stretch that pussy out!

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

I guess it all depends on his mood and how he feels. Logan overall can have sex anytime he wants. He’s your horndog after all.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards

He’s not that quick to fall asleep, he’ll stay in bed with you while you both cuddle each other and chat. After sex, the both of you take your time lay down and relax, feeling each others skin and heartbeat. This is a very relaxing time together.

[lurkingshan]

Japanese QL Corner

It's a quieter week as a few shows have just wrapped and the next wave hasn't started yet, but there is still Japanese ql airing, including what is shaping up to be an all time fav. Both of these current airing shows are on Gaga and I highly recommend watching!

Love is Better the Second Time Around

This show is so good, and so mature in exactly the way I hoped. And I don't mean mature as in explicit--there is sex in this show but it's not some wild heat level. It's mature in that it's a story about characters who know themselves, know what they want, and draw boundaries. Both Iwanaga and Miyata are going down as favorite characters for me; I especially love that Miyata is a more knowing and self aware spin on a really well known bl archetype (think Rain from LITA but if he actually knew exactly why he was reacting the way he was to Payu and was mad about it instead of just overwhelmed and confused). This week we got a lot deeper into his teenage hurt over Iwanaga and now have a firm understanding of why he's alternately giving into and resisting this attraction. I am looking forward to Iwanga figuring out how to repair the damage he caused and earn his trust back.

My Strawberry Film

This was easily my favorite episode so far of this meandering little show. Every week I am left wondering what exactly this drama is trying to say and be; it certainly doesn't feel like a bl. We have spent the vast majority of our time on doomed het romance while Ryo quietly pines for his oblivious friend in the background. But this week we finally got to know Minami outside of Hikaru's narrow gaze, and I like her a lot. Her scene with Ryo where they discussed their romantic woes and established each other as a safe zone was very sweet, and showed how perceptive she is about all these dynamics happening around her. I was discussing with @bengiyo whether the show is going for an aromantic read with her, and I'm not sure. I see the makings of it, but the presentation of her feelings on romance feels a bit muddled. I loved her calling Hikaru out on being self-centered and having absolutely no patience for his petty jealousy. Hikaru thinks he likes her, but he doesn't actually know her (or his own best friend). I liked the final scene between Ryo and Hikaru as well, and the terrible angst of Ryo's confession that he immediately took back. The way the lights and audio from oncoming traffic played over his face in that scene was a really fantastic way to communicate both a moment of clarity and a moment of fear in the aftermath. I'm curious to see where this show takes the ending; a romantic conclusion for the two boys would not feel genuine to me at this point, but I could see them leaving us on a note of burgeoning curiosity and hope.

Bonus: No Touching At All

I recently watched this 2014 jbl on @twig-tea's recommendation, and I really loved it (I have already watched it twice and will definitely be doing so again). This is a classic office romance between a young gay man, Shima, and his "straight" boss, Toga. It's a simple story but well executed, and the film has a strong sense of place that I really loved. Shima and Toga have a fairly instantaneous attraction, and Toga is the kind of laidback character who simply never gave much thought to his sexuality and doesn't care about the fact that Shima is a man; he likes who he likes. Shima, however, is carrying a lot of internalized homophobia and trauma from closeted men messing him around in the past, and has a hard time believing in Toga's sincerity. I really love the way this conflict plays out in the story, and I especially love the way Toga talks to Shima. He's a no bullshit kind of guy and he tries his best to reassure Shima, but he's not a pushover, either. Ultimately Shima has to work through his own insecurities and make the choice to be brave to make the relationship work. The ending of this one is amazing and left me feeling very confident in this couple, and I can't recommend it highly enough. It's the grey for this one, unfortunately, but if you have trouble finding it in HQ let me know and I'll point you (don't watch it on YT, the version on there is potato quality).

[baldurs-gape]

Gap in the Resume

In a way, Gale should have been grateful to Elminster, the man had pulled strings to get him the interview. Life was all well and good but he did feel a little guilty for relying so heavily on Astarion, not to mention it was setting a bad example that they made ends meet through skills of theft and contract killings. Determined to make an honest life, Gale had started job hunting once life had started to settle a bit and his hands weren't quite so full. Brushing out an invisible wrinkle from his tunic, he waited on the creaky leather sofa. Finally, the door opened.

"Mr. Dekarios?"

Standing so quickly his vision speckled, Gale tried to look confident as he approached the Dean of the school. It wasn't Blackstaff, he couldn't go back there, not after everything but a less prestigious school might just be what he needed.

"Good to meet you, and please, call me Gale." He shook hands with her eagerly and settled on the even less comfortable chair by the impressive desk.

"Elminster has talked highly about you and your skills. It made me think that perhaps you were a little too modest on your CV."

"Yes, well, some things are easier to explain in words than with in on paper."

The Dean looked at him over her glasses with a smile. "Well, here's your chance, Gale. Why would an ex-Chosen of Mystra herself want to teach at our school of all places?"

Rather than say that he was scraping the barrell and needed his old mentor's help in getting honest work, Gale tried to smile, cleared his throat and straightened his back. He'd rehearsed this, it was going to be fine, smooth even."

"Teaching has been somewhat thrust upon me in the last eight years or so. It's a little difficult to always keep track of time in the Underdark. It wasn't a career I had ever really entertained until I got firsthand experience of how rewarding it could be."

So far so good, the Dean nodded along and settled back with a more relaxed posture. Emboldened, Gale decided it was better to throw in some examples to back his words up.

"Perhaps my proudest moment as a teacher was when I took a small group on an expedition towards Lenore's tower and we encountered yet another minotaur - I swear they are the cockroaches of the Underdark - and the six with me made a meal of it." The somewhat puzzled look he received had him rushing to explain. "Before it would have been a lot of snapping and snarling at each other, more blood wasted than drank. Sebastian had a nasty habit of trying to claw the eyes out of anyone who so much as was near him when drinking. Yet there he was, happily sharing the bounty with five others!"

"Mr. Dekarios, Gale-" the Dean held up a finger, "-just what exactly do you teach? I was under the impression you were a wizard."

"I am!" Indignant, Gale huffed. "But you try teaching magic to 7000 feral vampire spawn. Manners had to come first."

"Seven. Thousand. Vampire. Spawn."

Nodding with vigour, Gale's arms came into play as he began to explain.

"We were responsible for them after freeing them. Well, first we had to sort out the Netherbrain while the Gur rounded them up and kept them safe from everyone including themselves. It wasn't like we could abandon them. I happen to take responsibility very seriously. It began with a book club for the more recently turned and those interested and just grew from there." Barely stopping to take a breath, he continued, "Trust me, I wanted to show them the wonders of magic but some of them couldn't even read, a tracesty if you ask me."

A strained smile appeared on the Dean's face. She sat primly, hands clasped on the table between them.

"Did this happen after your status as Chosen was revoke?"

"Yes. Well, not immediately. I spent a year trying to tame the Netherese orb in my chest." At that, the Dean looked alarmed. "Don't worry, it's all taken care of now, it's old news. But for a year I worked heavily on the research of the elimination of Netherese fragments bonded to a human entity. Alas before I could refine my findings and publish, a Nautiloid snatched me up as I was hanging my washing. Now, I know mindflayers don't have emotions in the same capacity but it was downright rude. Then they put the tadpole in my brain."

By that point the strained smile had fallen away and the Dean was outright alarmed, edging away from the table and away from Gale. Off script and caught up in the story, he wasn't slowing down.

"Anyway, you've probably heard of the Baldur's Gate Netherbrain incident. That was me and a couple of others who are now good friends of mine. But try putting that on a resume. It wasn't relevant to teaching magic really. I don't want to walk into the classroom as some mighty hero, I just want to be normal and treated as such. And now the spawn as all mostly settled, I feel I can leave them without fear of any incidents. I did so enjoy teaching them that I thought; why not? I could do this with young people. They'll probably be more likely to singe off your eyebrows by mistake than try to drain you of blood. Much cheaper if you ask me, scrolls of revivify used to make up a good 70% of our weekly expenses."

Tirade over, Gale leaned back in his chair and sighed, glad to have got that all out. A little sheepish at having gone so far off script, he offered a tiny smile. "Do you have any other questions about the gap in my resume? Because I don't think I touched on the mental health of students. Mystra demanded repeatedly that I kill myself. It is safe to say I wouldn't ever be anything but accepting and nurturing of even the most frustrating minds in the classroom. They're safe with me."

"Actually," the Dean's voice was a little breathy, "I think you've been very informative, thank you. I can let you know the outcome of the interview in the next tenday once all interviews for the position have concluded. Thank you so much for coming in today."

She stood and Gale copied. This time she didn't stand close to usher him out the room, a rather large amount of space was left between them. Gale's heart sank. It wasn't the first time an interview ended so abruptly and with such false smiles. Nodding, he turned to the door and left.

Outside, Astarion was leaning against the wall, covered from head to toe for safety.

"How did it go?" he asked.

Sadly, Gale shook his head and deflated. "I went off script. At least she didn't call security I guess?"

"Not to worry. We'll find a place. Hells, we could probably even found it, the Underdark Academy, a place for the unruly to come and be transformed into etiquette experts. What do you think?"

Laughing, Gale bumped their shoulders and sighed, trying to let go of the disappointment that had settled in his gut.

"You say the sweetest things to me, don't you?"

Their hands tangled until fingers interlaced and Astarion pulled it up to press a kiss to the back of Gale's. This job wasn't to be but that was alright. They had all the time in the world to figure it all out. And for Gale to discover that while he was in the interview, Astarion had stolen anything that moved from the school.

[shenanigans-and-imagines]

Curious, do your Tav ideas work with dark urge too? Also cuddles! Have any cuddling head canons you’d like to share? :)

I honestly haven't seen enough dark urge playthroughs to say for certain. If anybody has a dark urge Astarion romance compilation they want to recommend me I'll take a look.

I will say I think Ace!Tav would be a very reluctant durge. I can't imagine them enjoying the violence and actively fight it at every chance, at least in how I characterize them in my brain.

As for cuddles, stand back, I'm about to ramble.

Let's be up front about this, both Astarion and Ace!Tav are touch starved as fuck

Astarion might have had a string of lovers, but we all saw what he looks like when he first got a hug; man doesn't know what to do with his hands, he hasn't been properly cuddled in centuries

Meanwhile Ace!Tav has more or less trained themselves to hold back on touching other people

When hugs and cuddles are tied to romantic connection, and romance is tied to sex, it's hard to get cuddles without something more being asked for

They had more than one relationship where they said yes to sex because what they really wanted was the cuddles after; it's a mess

So when Astarion and Ace!Tav finally get the whole truth out in the open about how they care for one another and that neither of them are particularly interest in sex, a whole new world opens up

It's slow going at first, neither are entirely certain what the rules are

Ace!Tav starts first, a brush of the hand here and head on the shoulder there

Slowly Astarion starts to reciprocate, squeezing their fingers and pulling them closer

One night they stay out late talking; not about anything in particular, just to enjoy each other's company and pass the time

Ace!Tav starts to get tired and says they need to go to bed...and, if Astarion wants to join them, he can, if he wants

Astarion just nods, any thought of words escaping him as Ace!Tav leads him to their tent

It's a bit awkward at first; Astarion is unfamiliar with this and honestly annoyed with himself that he's so clueless, his only consolation is that Ace!Tav seems just as unsure as him

Eventually they lay down facing each other, with Ace!Tav asking him if this was alright

He then takes the initiative, pulling them closer so his arms can wrap properly around them; he can feel their heart beat against his chest, echoing inside him like a memory

It's only then does he relax, knowing for certain that this really is all either of them want

After that, they hardly spend a night apart

Astarion may not need to sleep, but that's not going to stop him from cuddling with Ace!Tav until they do

They switch big spoon and little spoon

Some times Astarion wants to drift off to the sound of their heart in his ear and sometimes he wants to wrap them in his arms, knowing he's trust enough to keep them safe

In all honesty, Ace!Tav prefers to be the little spoon, but they can't deny there is something satisfying in being the big spoon now and again

Both of them had fallen victim to the cat in the lap rule; if one of them in laying on top of the other, they can't move for anything, no excuses

This starts to slowly extend to outside the tent as well

In actuality Ace!Tav is a very physically affectionate person, and Astarion is more than willing to indulge them

What better way to announce to the world, "this person is mine and I am theirs"

Hand holding, hand kisses, and playful nudges abound

It takes a lot of patience and communication to get to the point, but Gods does it feel right when they do

[bestnottoask]

From Laughter to Love {Part One}

{Masterlist}

Other Parts -Haven't written anymore yet but am thinking about at least writing a part 2

Pairing- Satoru Gojo x Fem Reader

Request- No

Summary- You are in you third and final year of jujutsu Tech, and the person who had helped you through it all is your best friend Satoru Gojo, whom you’ve seemed to fall in love with over the years. But little to your knowledge there may me more to the flirtatious jokes and constant teasing he constantly throws at you. After a night of truth or dare in your dorm many feelings begin to arise between you too. Should you both address them? Or is it not worth the risk of compromising your friendship

Genre- Fluff, Slight Angst

Warnings- Casual swearing, Suggestive implications, mutual pining, friends to lovers eventually, kind of slow burn?, I think that all for now.

●Ambiguous Ending. Probably will make more parts

A/N- I Love this but also kind of hate it. Most of it was written between 1am- 4.40am so that's probably why. Let me know what you think.

Word Count- 3.3k

As a third-year student at Jujutsu Tech student your life was pretty full and pretty stressful. So, to keep your head clear you often went on short runs at night around campus; and tonight was no different. Or at least it started off no different from any other night.  

You went on a run for about 30 minutes around the school campus. The cold icy air pricked at your skin and made you nose tingle. You liked seeing the school like this. So cold an empty. Describing it made it sound scary or lonely. But really, it looked peaceful and calm like this. A large contrast to the noise and chaos that persuaded during the day. 

Once you had finished your run you made your way back to your dorm room. But to your surprise you found a tall white-haired man sitting on your bed leaning against the wall, while mindlessly scrolling on his phone. He had already made himself comfortable with one leg over the other and his shoes thrown on the floor. To be fair you really shouldn’t be surprised at this point, Satoru was always making his way to your dorm room, invited or not.  

Satoru and you had been very close friends since you both started at Jujutsu Tech. You were always quite nervous, especially around him, but he didn’t seem to care, he just clung to your side until you began to open up to him. He was the person you trusted most in the world and the person you had the most fun with. You both would banter with each other and were both very comfortable with one another; often pushing the usual boundary of platonic. It was mostly him though, due to his usual lack of understanding personal space and how he tended to be quite flirtatious especially with you. 

Over the years you had come to realized that you developed feelings towards Satoru, but you knew better then to admit them to him as it would only complicate your friendship and leave you with heartache. He was the strongest after all; who came from money and power and had girls throwing themselves at him left and right. Hence, you figured there was no chance he would ever reciprocate your feelings. You should just be grateful for the wonderful friendship you already have with him. 

“Hey there” there he says, barely acknowledging your presence as if this were a public place and not your dorm room.  

You sigh closing the door behind you and take off your shoes before falling back onto the bed starring at the ceiling. 

“You know it would be really nice to come back after a run and have my bed to myself to relax " you said not bothering to move your gaze from the ceiling. 

“What can’t I check in on my favorite girl?” He chuckled softly, putting down his phone and turning to look down at you. 

“Well, if you're going to be here at least make yourself useful and order us some food” You responded with a smile as you got up to grab some clothes before heading to your bathroom to get changed. 

“As you wish” he responded “but you owe me one” he winked at you with a smirk just before you closed the bathroom door. 

Satoru had a habit of mindlessly flirting with you, and no matter how much he did it, it always still seemed to make you a bit flustered. You knew it didn’t mean anything and he was just teasing, but you would be lying if you said it didn’t pull at your heart strings. 

You came out moments later wearing a black singlet and some shorts. Despite the cold nights the weather was getting warmer and you and Satoru were close so you didn’t mind showing a bit more skin when it’s just him, and you didn’t want to wake in the morning sweating once the sun hit your room. But as you exited the bathroom and put the clothes you had just removed into your laundry basket you couldn’t help but feel his gaze on you.  

“What?” You said noticing his stare. 

“Just enjoying the view” Satoru shrugged with a small grin as he leaned back placing his hands behind his head, eyeing you up and down looking at the way your clothes hugged your figure. 

“whatever” you rolled your eyes. But you couldn’t help a small smile creep onto your face. 

“So, when’s the food getting here?” you question taking a seat next to him. 

“Wow so eager to get rid of me” he places a hand on his chest pretending to be offend, to which you shook your head at and smiled. 

Amused by your reaction a grin spread across his face. “How about we play a game?” 

“What did you have in mind?” you asked. 

“Truth or Dare.” his voiced was laced with mischief so you knew he was up to something, but you were intrigued so you agreed. 

“Fine” 

“Right let's begin” he said turning to you. 

“Truth or Dare?” He said poshly, for his own amusement. 

“dare” you said without hesitation, confidently smiling at him. 

“Ah adventitious I see, no worries I’ll keep it simple for the first round. How about… you give me a kiss on the cheek.” He pointed to his right cheek while playfully fluttering his eyelashes at you.  

Even though you know it doesn’t mean anything and he’s just doing it to mess with you, you can’t help but blush a little. 

“Fine come here” you sigh. 

You quickly cup his face with one and pressed a kiss to his cheek before pulling back, resuming your position across from him. 

Little to your knowledge, as soon as your lips made contact with Satori’s cheek, a spark of electricity ran through his body. He closed his eyes briefly, savoring the feeling. When he opened them again this gaze locked with yours.  

“That was… acceptable” He drawled out, trying to regain his composure. 

“Now I pick truth” he said before you even asked the question, hoping to distract you from the faint blush on his neck. 

“Hmm… what’s your favorite nickname I use for you?” 

Satoru loved all the nicknames you used for him. Or more so he loved the fact that you’d use nicknames with him. Some were cute, some were funny, and some were down right insulting, but none of them ever failed to make him smile. Though his favorite would have to be ‘Toru’. It was simple but cute; and it was the first nickname you’d ever used on him. 

“Well, that’s easy” he began “It’s definitely ‘Toru’, I don’t know why, I just like hearing you use it”. You hummed in response mentally noting it down to use that one more often. 

“So, truth or dare?” Satoru continued. 

“Mm truth” you replied. 

After a short moment of silence Satoru asked “why me? why do you put up with all my bullshit?” his voice was more sincere this time. The question hung heavy in the air, and Gojo’s gaze searched yours for an answer while you processed his question. 

“What do you mean?” you asked softly tilting your head slightly in an attempt to better read him. This question was a bit out of character for him. He usually held his head high with confidence and an arguably inflated ego, but right now you could almost feel the insecurity coming off him. 

“I mean” he started, his tone was thoughtful, “We’ve known each other for years now, and yet you still hang out with me despite all the crap I pull. Why?” 

“Because were friends Toru” you began looking into his eyes “yes you pull a lot of crap and can be a real idiot sometimes” you chuckle “But that’s what I like about you. Sure, you can annoy me, but you also make me laugh. Much more than anyone else I’ve met”. 

Now you were the one searching his eyes, trying to see if he understood what you said and what he means to you. As much as his doubt in himself and your friendship hurts, you appreciate that he is willing to share those doubts and insecurities with you. Showing you a more vulnerable side of him that many don’t get to see, or even know exist.  

His expression seemed to have softened at your words, a warm glow spreading through his chest. He hadn’t expected such sincerity in your words or you voice. He rarely allowed himself to be vulnerable, so to hear you say such things when he did allow himself, made his heat flutter.  

“So, you like that about me?” His voice was soft, and you responded with a nod and a smile. 

“I’m Glad” a smile started to grow on his face. “Really Glad” he chuckled now with a toothy grin. “Guess this means I can tease you even more!” He laughed. 

“Well now hold on” you laughed.  

“Nuh, too late you already said it” he cut you off with a chuckle 

“great” you groaned burying your face in your hands. In reality you were very happy with Satoru’s demeanor going back to his playful self, even if it means he’d be teasing you more.  

Gojo snorted at your reaction before the laughter slowly died down. “But seriously, thank you” he said softly. 

“Of course,” you responded. Even in the silence it was never uncomfortable between the two of you.  

“So, where were we?” he asked breaking the silence. 

“I believe it was your turn, so truth or dare Satoru?” you replied. 

A smile formed on his face. He’d hoped you’d suggest to continue the game. It gave him more opportunities to learn more about you and have fun. 

“dare” he declared. “And make it a good one” he said with a challenging stare. 

“okay” you said narrowing your eyes at him trying to think of a good dare. 

“When the food arrives, you have to eat it without your hands” you declared with a smirk.  

Satoru’s face fell at your words. “But I ordered Ramen, it's going to be such a mess!”  

You laughed in response “well you shouldn’t have picked dare” 

“Oh, come onn” he groaned dramatically, but couldn’t help laugh along with you. 

As if on cue Satoru got a notification stating the food was here. He dramatically groaned as he got out of bed and went outside to collect it. When he got back you were sitting on the floor crossed legged eagerly waiting. He sat down across from you and began to unpack the food handing you your serving.  

“enjoy” you said with a playful smirk and you used your chopsticks to eat your ramen.  

“You’re going to pay for this” he said shaking his head and holding the bowl to his face. He took a deep breath preparing himself for the task ahead. He glanced longingly at his chopsticks, so close yet so forbidden. 

With a sigh he leaned his head into the bowl and began his task. Slurping noises filled the room and when he came up for air you couldn’t help but burst out laughing looking at the state he was in. Broth dribbled down his chin, wetting his shirt, and a small noodle stuck to the edge of his nose.  

he couldn’t help but smile as your laughter filled the room, encouraging him to continue. Despite the mess and embarrassment, Gojo found himself enjoying the attention. He continued to chow down in his ramen, determined to complete the dare.  

“Ha! take that” He exclaimed triumphantly, lifting his head from the now empty bowl. He wiped his chin with the back of his hand and he sat back proudly. “Not bad hey?” he smirked proudly. 

“Yeah, but look at your shirt” You giggled gesturing to the shirt that now had ramen broth falling down the neckline. 

“Guess I won’t be winning any fashion awards tonight” he said with a shrug “but hey, at least you can’t say I ever backed down from a dare” he said with a shit-eating grin.  

Gojo then proceeded to pull his shirt up and over his shoulders, then tossed it into your laundry basket like it was a goal. His casualty surprised you for a moment, as you stared at his bare chest. His skin was smooth and pale, with a bit of it glistering near his neck, no doubt thanks to the ramen.  

“Now look at who’s enjoying the view”. His voiced snapped you out of your thoughts and pull your eye-line up to meet his. You instantly blushed at him catching you starring and tried to play it off cool by rolling your eyes. 

He laughed at your eye roll before continuing.  

“You know, when we first met you used to be much more closed off. I guess I do grow on a person” he said smugly. 

“More like wear them down, but okay” You laughed, and he laughed along with you at your comment. 

“Well, it’s still sounds like progress to me” He smiled. 

You giggled at you collected the packages that the food came in and turned to place them on your desk. Gojo snuck up behind you and wrapped his arms around your waist, while placing his head on your shoulder. 

“What are you doing Toru?” 

He just shrugged his shoulders before tightening his grip and lifting you up before throwing you on the bed despite your protests. But as he threw you on the bed you managed to grab his arm, consequently bringing him down with you. As he toppled on top of you with a loud ‘oomph’ a loud burst of laughter erupted from the both of you. 

“Hey! what was that for?” despite his words, there was no real anger in his tone, only mild surprise and playful annoyance.  

“that’s what you get. If I go down, I’m bring you down with me” You laughed. 

Gojo then lifted his head from the sheets leaning on his elbow. It was only now that either of you noticed the compromising position. He was on top of you, knee between your legs, hips pressed to yours, and faces inches apart. You could feel the warmth of his breath on you.  

After a moment of silence, it seemed realization of your current position pinned beneath him, hit him. “Ah shit-sorry” he stammered lifting himself off of you. Yet despite the awkwardness, there was something undeniably thrilling to him about being having you in that position so close to him. His mind raced with thoughts and possibilities, each more enticing than the last.  

“Uh its fine really” you assured him trying to ease the tension. He sat next to you on the bed, both of you looking forward. The silence was defining. He pursed his lips together and looked around the room trying to find something to talk about.  

“I think some of that ramen went up my nose” he said finally breaking the uncomfortable silence. 

“That’s your segue?” you questioned looking over at him. 

“Well, you use what you got” he shrugged causing a soft laugh to escape your lips easing the tension a bit.  

“that’s so gross” you replied. 

“It’s not like I snorted the whole bowel, besides it adds just a little extra flavor yeah?” He grinned as you made a face of disgust. 

He leaned back on the bed, propping himself up with his elbows. “Anyways, it’s your fault, you dare me to eat ramen without using my hands” 

“You told me to ‘make it a good one’” you defended. “And it was a good one. Good for my amusement, not your hygiene” you laughed, to which he rolled his eyes at.  

“True, true” he agreed with a nod “but usually people dare someone to, I don’t take an item of clothing off or something” he smiled 

“Well in the end you did do that” you gestured to his bare chest. 

Gojo glanced down at his exposed torso, a sheepish grin tugging at the corners of his mouth. “Well technically that wasn’t apart if the dare, but hey, who am I to complain” he raised his hands “I love seeing you blush” he said with a wink. 

“Please, I was not blushing” You defended yourself 

“Oh, come on,” he teased gently, smirking at your denial “you were basically eye-fucking me” 

“Excuse me?!” You raised your eyebrow playfully. 

Gojo chuckled, finding amusement in your embarrassment. “I’m serious, your eyes were practically glued to my body” 

“What, like how yours were earlier when I got changed?” You said accusatory  

“Hey, at least I admit when I check someone out” he said raising his hands in defense. 

“whatever” You just softly chuckled and shock you head. In reality the fact that Satoru had admitted to checking you out made your heart flutter. 

He pulled out his phone and check the time, feeling disappointed that it was getting late.  

“Well,” He sighed lifting himself up from your bed “as much as I would love to stay here and have you tell me all about how hot I am” He said while gesturing to his toned torso “It’s getting late so I should get going. Don’t want to be late for class tomorrow” 

“Alright, later Toru.” You said ignoring his comment “thanks for the company” you smiled as you walked him to your door. 

“anytime” he winked.  

Just as you were about to close the door he spoke up. “Oh, and next time, you don’t have to dare me to eat ramen without using my hands just to see me shirtless, you can just ask and I’d be happy to abide” He smirked before turning on his heel and making his way down the hallway.  

You smiled before closing your door and letting out a large sigh. This crush of yours's was getting out of hand, and only seemed to grow more each day.  

On the other hand, as Gojo made his way back to his dorm room he couldn’t help but feel a warm tightening feeling in his chest at the thought if you. Once he entered his room, he threw on the nearest shirt and then collapsed on his bed staring up at the ceiling. He had known about his feelings for you for a while, but after tonight, he knew there was no going back. He needed you in his life, and he craved being more than just your friend more than he craved any sweet known to man. You made feel safe and happy. Just your smile sent electric shots throughout his body, and hearing your laugh would make is heart swell. You were the best thing that had ever happened to him; and he wouldn’t know what to do without you.  

He wanted more than anything to tell you how he feels. How you consume his every thought. He wants to hold you in his arms through the night and be by your side every second of every day. He wanted to shower you in the endless love he felt for you and never let you go. But he was scared. Your friendship already meant more than the world to him, and he was so scared of ruining what you two already had. He knew he’d never forgive himself if he did something that compromised your friendship. But he just couldn’t seem to get you out of his mind; and the idea of moving on from you and seeing someone else seemed unthinkable. Maybe it was time he let you know his true feelings. 

[lemon-natalia]

Nona the Ninth Reaction - Chapter 28

‘golden eyes like a dead animal’s’ you are sick and twisted Tamsyn Muir, sick and twisted (affectionate). also that is an interesting description of Kiriona's eyes. of course part of it is that she is quite literally in a dead body, but these are also the eyes that John got after he gained his necromantic powers

ohhhh my god. i don’t think my heart can take Kiriona asking after Harrow. she gave up her life for her, did the best she could to take care of Harrow’s body, and now she doesn’t even know if Harrow’s alive or not

oof both Pyrrha and Nona clearly know that she’s Alecto, but Nona really doesn’t want to remember. i wonder how long exactly Pyrrha knew who Nona was, even if she was hoping she was Gideon, i feel like part of her must have suspected since the beginning

hmm i wonder if there’s something significant about Alecto’s name? not in terms of its Doylist meaning i.e. being named after one of the Furies, but in universe. here Nona doesn’t want Pyrrha to say her name because it will make her remember, John (from what i recall) only ever used nicknames like A.L. and Annabel Lee etc. when talking to Harrow, and both he and the other Lyctors had a remarkably strong reaction to Mercy using it at the end of HtN:

'A ripple of ice over the face. A hardening of the mouth. He said quietly, “Don’t call her-” “Alecto! Alecto! Alecto!” repeated Mercy shrilly. The other Lyctors flinched each time she said it, as though it were an aural stab’

oh wow, Alecto’s consciousness (voice?) rising up to speak from Nona is very disturbing. once again, Alecto doesn’t seem like the nicest person. which makes sense i suppose given she is in actuality a Resurrection Beast herself and seemingly very pissed off about the whole ‘killing humanity and putting her in a human form’ thing

‘astonishingly, Pash, helping an extremely feeble and aged person’ i mean good on Pash for helping the elderly, i guess?

it’s gotta be so strange for Palamedes’ mother and the other people in the Sixth to be dealing with the ‘i’m dead and in Naberius Tern’s also dead body’ thing. it can hardly be what they imagined when he and Camilla went off to the First in GtN. speaking of, i do still wonder how everyone’s family members, the Cohort etc. reacted to the news of basically everyone dying after going off to try and be Lyctors

‘Palamedes was acting as though he were a tiny at show-and-tell’ is that not how Palamedes always acts about everything

Pyrrha Dve queen of ill-advised romantic relationships. poor her, she’s lost basically everyone she cared about before (G1deon, Wake, and now Pal and Cam, Nona is dying) now as a result of Lyctorhood to some degree

oh why does everything they’re saying here feel like a goddamn funeral, i categorically don’t like this

'something white and grey and powdery [...] Camilla [...] - to Nona's horror - ate it' i’m assuming that’s Palamedes’ skull goop making a reappearance. ew

ohhh wow this is a lot worse than i thought it was going to be, they’ve actually just straight up merged themselves into a single person. i suspected the whole Camilla-and-Palamedes thing was going to come back but not like this. it’s not like they had a lot of choices, and i mean i guess it’s better on an emotional level than one of them dying and the other having to live with it, but still, yikes

wdym i am categorically not crying about the fact that Kiriona is apparently totally disinterested in this whole situation, but her first instinct is still to want to hand over her jacket to … Cam/Pal. (Pam?)

listen i get what Palamedes is trying to do here, encouraging Ianthe to accept Lyctorhood as a mutual loss & rebirth rather than a sole sacrifice of the cavalier, but quite frankly i think poor Naberius would like being merged into a single person with Ianthe even less than being murdered

[smallgodseries]

[image description: A chipper character wearing a red and deep blue plaid shirt and newsperson’s cap. They hold a bottle in their right hand and point at it with their left. The classic symbols for ‘Male’, ‘Female’, are entwined with a question mark — these symbols appear to be spinning differently on the bottle front than on its neck. Inside the thin golden bezel cameo oval that may (or may not) be shifting its orientation is an impressionist mix of magenta and blue. outside it, five colored horizontal stripes  — Pink, White, Magenta, Black, and Blue.Text reads, “201, RIVER ALGOOD, the small god of the Gender Fluid”]

• • • • •

“Okay, kid, so you found the bar.  Good on you.  That means you need to be here.  No, there’s no cover charge, and we don’t care how old you are—think of it as a public house or an inn as much as it’s a tavern.  Or hell, go with coffee shop.  That’s a modern way of saying ‘gathering place with drinks and plenty of chairs, where you can be yourself with other people who are also being themselves, and not need to worry about anybody seeing you.’  This idea that bars are only about the alcohol is a lot more recent.  But then again, so is clean water.

“Huh?  Yeah, I do talk about it like I was there, because kid, I always have been.  Go all the way back to the creation, to the first people we’d recognize as humans, standing there all hairy and muddy and naked, and there were always the ones who felt like they were one thing when people said they were something else, or who were something different today than they were yesterday, than they’d be tomorrow.  You’re nothing new.

“Honey, you don’t gotta look so scared.  You’re here.  That tells me you belong here, and that tells me you’re one of mine.  If you weren’t, you’d never have found the doors.  I’m not going to judge anything except that nail polish—it looks like you didn’t use a base coat, and it’s going to stain your cuticles.  But you’re young, you’ll learn how to do your nails without dyeing your skin at the same time.  Unless ‘necrosis’ is the look you’re going for.  In that case, you’ve got a lead on the competition.

“Anyway, you’re nothing new, and you’re something valid, and no one gets to tell you who or what or why you are except for you.  All those choices are yours to make, all those futures belong to you, and I’m just the lucky god who gets to guide you along the way.

“My pronouns?  Kid, I’ll take any pronouns you’ve got.  I keep ‘em in a bucket in the back.  Some of them can get kinda frisky sometimes, but they’re all good.  If you need new ones, you can fish ‘em out of the bucket.

“Oh, which ones am I currently using?  I find that ‘divine/divinity’ works pretty well for me.  If that’s too much of a mouthful, you can use my name—River—or ‘they/them’ is almost never entirely wrong.  But really, anything’s good by me.

“I am the god of the changing and the questioning, the malleable and the multiple, the ones who don’t conform, and the ones who won’t, or can’t.  I belong to all of them, all of you, and I will keep you as safe as I can.  It’s not easy.

“Nothing important ever is.

“So you found the bar.  That’s the first step.  Now here’s the question of the hour: what are your pronouns?  Speak, and we can know each other better.”