#what i DONT like is random people venting to me for no fucking reason without asking! stop!

[woomycritiques543]

Just read that vent/rant post you did,holy shit,I don't know who's Star but what the actual F U C K[I honestly feel bad for you,are you doing okay as of right now?]

Yeah.... it's awful.

Even if I was Star, why would they still be stalking me after all those years if im not even interested in "Anti Hazbin" stuff anymore?

Since im not- Why is Cherry/What The Hazbin/Sia's (its a group) fans stalking and being racist towards this random kid that most of these people haven't spoke to in almost four years?! Wasn't the point of this community was to be against bullies and racists? It's so fucking creepy, reminds me of the "its your consequences!" harassment towards Erin Frost- but 10000x worse since it's racism towards this random black young woman they basically groomed into a hatedom to go after Vivziepop and her fans despite knowing that Star shouldnt even have been in this fandom at 15-17 to begin with, and now that the adults in the hatedom cant groom her anymore, they've been sending racial slurs and harassment towards this child, for years! The "anti hazbin" hatedom groomed this child into joining their hate groups by telling her how "great!" she is for saying what they want her to say towards Vivziepop and leaking her personal info behind her back (like they did on Tapatalk) and then the "Anti Hazbin" fandom groomed her again by "accepting" her into their hate group (discord and all) to bully Vivziepop and her fandom -and now they're spouting racism at this person of color for leaving?! Why?!

What is is? A online cult? Why?! Why do they keep harassing these poor kids with all this creepy parasocial shit?! Its so fucking weird and gross! It feels like im watching a psyhological horror movie. What the fuck?! These "anti hazbin" people really be convincing thier literal followers that its "ok" to harass people just because they wear a tshirt, like a cartoon (not even if its for bad reasons, but just because), or anyone who likes Viv or anyone who doesnt support their groups or the people they idolize so much. The other way around being- you guessed it, Vivziepop and her "followers" who feel the need to defend her for almost anything she does, spreads her ideolegies, harass any "disbeleivers" of her or her shows being "near perfect", etc. This is just a reverse of that!

In case you're wondering: These are the definitions of a "online cult":

It's either the Hazbin fandom and their parasocial relationship with Vivziepop causing them to try to harm anyone "bad faith" who doesnt agree with their ideolegies and only say that the "true" followers are the ones who almost 100% support her without quesitoning it or support her ideologies one way or another, or its the hatedom and how they also groom people (including children as young as 15 or less!) into following their ideolegies against Vivziepop, with the people they worship convincing them not just criticize Viv, but to outright (even if unintentionally due to the toxic nature of social media.) convince people to outright verbally abuse fans who dont agree with their ideologies and abuse those who try to no longer support said groups, same for the Hazbin fandom, but centering around toxic positivity instead of negativity. They are both literal online cults- one just centers around Vivziepop, while the other one centers around being against her to the point of basically worshipping people who outright have stated that they want her career destroyed, not just the group I mentioned but multiple people that they ideolize for their hazbin criticism posts no matter how awful that their behavior online becomes, the same way people idolize Vivziepop just because of the content she makes.

ANTI HAZBIN:

THE HAZBIN FANDOM: (Art Credit: Miss Nightmare.)

There's being supportive- and then there's being a goddamn cult and idolizing someone to parasocial extents and then creating propaganda about how anyone who doesnt support her are "haters!" regardless if they like Hazbin or not. Same with the kind of shit happening in the "Anti Hazbin" tag. You people are disgusting!

It's why ive turned off anon, Twitter and Tumblr is full of so much parasocial grossness from "im online so I say what I want!" racists and homophobes it's so disgusting. Ughhhhhhh it makes me feel like im touching a piece of dirt with a shit in it! Nasty people! 🤮 It's starting to make me question whether I should even use the "Hazbin Critical" tag since they also have creeps like this that have been targetting people for who knows how long. I know there's the "all fandoms are toxic!" statement but it comes to a point where things become outright cultish. It's so damn gross! What the hell?!

[philosophicaldefenestration]

tw bit of a vent

ive never thought of my asexuality as a big deal until recently. When i figured it out i was like oh cool! but i didnt feel the need to tell anyone. I didn't mind not seeing rep on tv - it didnt feel like i was missing out.

but over the last month or so its felt everywhere. all the songs are about sex and there's endless stories of people cheating because the couldn't help it in the heat of the moment and i cant go more than a few minutes of scrolling about my fav characters without something horny being mentioned and can never escape people talking about some random thing that is apparently just soooo attractive for some inexplicable reason.

i came out to a friend the other day and she went "oh so you don't like anyone?" and she was so lovely about it and didn't say any "maybe one day" stuff but i still had to explain that ace ≠ aro. which i didn't mind! but it reminded me that no one ever knows.

i was talking to another friend about how we like girls and she went "uhm [my name]"... and then proceeded to remind me im ace. like gee thanks i almost forgot. but when i challenged what she meant she just kept saying "its not like you get.. y'know over them" and wouldnt say the actual words until i asked her to. during this conversation she was basically talking about she wanted more people to talk about attraction with (our friend group is pretty gay and pretty single - but mind you we arent even of age yet). and she was basically saying that she couldnt talk to me about that stuff because i wouldn't understand and "its not the same" and i just. like. i know it isnt. im reminded of that every single day. and it hurt so much to have someone i considered my best friend to just remind me i was different and could never understand. i wish they would put as much effort into understanding as we do. and dont fucking treat me like a child who cant use the big scary inappropriate words just because i dont feel a certain type of attraction.

I'm a bit tired of people calling asexuality 'not a big deal.'

Here's the thing, I never thought it was a big deal either. I didn't have a big angsty coming out about being aro or being ace. It was difficult in a sense to think of the future I'd imagined for myself not coming true, but I didn't mourn that future. I was happy that there were others out there feeling what I was feeling and going through what I was going through.

But it's become a big deal. It's become a big deal because as I have grown older, I have realised the future is still fucking blurry. I have no idea what to expect from it. Society was not built for those who do not or cannot follow its rules. I've realised just how MUCH people say aphobic stuff on a daily basis. I feel constantly othered by comments that carelessly remind us we are out of the majority. That remind us again and again that we are NOT the norm and will never BE the norm. I rarely see myself on TV and in books and in movies. People feel weird about it, so they just never bring it up like an unspoken secret. I'm constantly doubted and told I'm mistaken about my own identity, which causes anxiety and self doubt so many years later. People make a variety of assumptions about me and tell me it's 'sad' and I'm 'missing out.'

It's not just about 'not having sex.' It's about feeling like you're the only one at a concert that doesn't know the words. it about society making you feel like you're just a little bit off. My sexuality/romantic identity doesn't define me. I don't WANT it to be a big deal.

But it is. It is a big deal because all of you make it a big deal.

[pigstepmp3-moved]

holy hell, gamers, i finally reached one whole thousand followers! how bonkers is that! when i first made this blog in december 2018, i was just trying to start over in a new fandom. ive been active on tumblr for a looong time (since i was like 11, which is. not great, but we wont get into that). i cant remember quite why i decided to remake, but i never imagined getting a higher following than i did before, but i did! 1000 followers is bonkers, i’ve never had a thousand of anything! i seriously cant thank each and every one of you enough, whether you followed me for 911 or for mcyt or for whatever!

now, since ive reached this absolutely bonkers milestone, im feeling particularly sappy! so under the cut, i have some friends and mutuals tagged who are super great n who are always an absolute pleasure to see on my dash! <3 again, thank you all so much! (ps, if we’re mutuals and i didnt tag u in this, that doesnt mean i dont love and appreciate you!! i mostly am just picking people to tag based off how often i see them on my dash! i love all of u so much <3)

♡ 911 FRIENDS ♡

(aka the ogs, aka the fire fam)

♡ @lovelessmotel ♡ emily!! god, where do i even begin with how much i love and adore you!! i know youre one of my big sisters, but wow i am so proud of how much youve discovered yourself since we’ve met!! like wow, look at this epic, gorgeous person whos one of MY close friends! im so lucky to be friends with you! thank you so much for being my friend, i appreciate you and all the sisterly advice you’ve given me more than i can ever put into words!

♡ @eddiediaz-buckley ♡ sav!! mom!! i love u so unbelievably much!! i am so unbelievably grateful for you and everything youve done for me! all the advice youve given me and all the times youve let me vent to you have been so important to me and i cannot thank you enough for all that. im soso appreciative of you and im so glad that i have someone as amazing as you as my mom/big sister (we’ll never really figure out our fams family dynamics, will we?) (ps, whenever i go outside and have my keys with me, its always so comforting to feel the keychain you got me! its like my moms with me everywhere i go!)

♡ @liesoverthec ♡ bonbonbonbon!!! i love you so much, you wouldnt BELIEVE how much i love you!!! im so glad we met bc you are so unbelievably kind!! there is a very good reason a nickname for u is bonbon bc you are just as sweet as candy!! maybe even more so!! i love having you as one of my big sisters, you give such wonderful advice and talking to you always makes me feel a million times better!! i love you and i am soso glad i get to call you my friend!

♡ @marauder-girl ♡ sabsabsab!! i love u so much, u funky lil future lawyer!! im so proud of u and i can hardly believe ur gonna be my Lawyer big sister!!! thats so awesome!! i cant believe such a rad person is one of MY friends!! how lucky am i!! i love having you as one of my big sisters, youre so kind and funny and talented and your advice has always been so helpful to me too! thank you so much for being my friend and for always being there for me!!

♡ @nighting-gale17 ♡ cait, my love, my wifey!!! wowowow i love u so much!!! im so glad we’re friends, you are so unbelievably lovely!! youre also so unbelievably talented like??? hey queen wanna hand some of ur writing ability over to the unfortunate (like me). i’m so glad we’re friends, youre so sweet and even tho we dont talk as much as we used to, i still have SO much love for you in my heart

♡ @africaneuropean ♡ rae, my father!! i love u so much!! i know we havent talked at all in. who knows how long. but i still have so much love for u in my heart!! you are so iconic and cool and funny, im so glad i met you n became friends with you!! ur one of the coolest people i know, i hope i can be as cool and mysterious and wonderful as you one day

♡ @evaneddie ♡ DHYL!!! dhyl pickle i love u so much!!! whenever u pop into my inbox with random nice messages, every part of me lights up!!! u are so kind to me and for what!! i miss talking to u as much as we used to, you are so sweet and you are such a good friend!! i love u n im SO proud of how far youve come with gif making, i still remember when u first started n youve gotten SO amazing at gifs lately!! i love u soso much n im so glad we’re friends, youre so awesome!!!

♡ @basil-the-writer ♡ des!!! i love u so much!!! i know we’ve never rly talked all that much but im glad we have interacted in the ways that we have!! u are so sweet n so talented!! like the fact that u have the patience for those lil video edits u do?? that is so cool!! all ur edits are so cool, i cannot imagine being able to make stuff like that without dying every single time. u are so cool n i love being able to call u my friend!!

♡ GRIFF ♡

(aka griff)

♡ @yawnralphio ♡ u get ur own section bc u are my only 911 friend who isnt an og, but thats ok bc u are so swaggy!! i love being friends with u griff, u are so cool and funny and i am so glad that u still want to be friends with me despite all of the horrifying things u’ve learned about mcyt from me jdhfajkdhfa. i love u so much n i am so excited to get to know u more n get closer to u!!

♡ FRUITBLR ♡

(aka mcyt friends)

♡ @fear-epidemic ♡ atlas u are so swaggy and funny!! tumblr funny man!! im so glad we’re mutuals, i love u a whole lot. that one time u me n wilby played bed wars together was so fun even if we’re really bad! n that one time we played on the fruitblr server while on vc was so fun, i loved talking to u n playing with u so much, we gotta do that again sometime. i love u so much chapin n im so glad we’re friends!!

♡ @netheritedream ♡ hari my beloved... i love u so much. like literally so much that its really embarassing. i am so glad u tagged me in that one follow forever post n put the offer on the table to let me join the server. i love being ur dumb lil husband!!! jus like actual fundy, i would risk it all to watch treasure planet with u. i love u sososo much, i wish i could live closer to u so i could actually talk to u more often </333 im going through severe withdrawal, pray for me. im gonna stop talking for now bc if i kept going on, this post would be several miles along n nobody has time for that </3 just know that i love u so much and i love having matching icons n i love being ur husband, i love u so much

♡ @sootswilbur ♡ tommy... i care you so much. little bromther!!! im sososo glad we’re friends bc u are so kind to me all the time n u are so easy to talk to!! ur also so talented, ur writing n ur gifs are so amazing n im so proud of all the awesome stuff u make!! seeing u experiment more with ur gif sets n trying new things is so awesome n inspiring and i love seeing ur experiments work out!! i love u soso much n im so happy to be ur big brother!! (or one of them at least)

♡ @fruitbur ♡ virgil my Other beloved... i love u so much!! u are one of the kindest people ive ever met n im so glad i met u!! i know ive already told u this before but ur tagging system is so sweet n i love seeing u reblog my posts bc im like “yay alastair is gonna tell me that he loves me in the tags :D” i also lovelovelove ur theme, i love the soft pink and the lil aesthetic board that u have pinned, its so nice to look at!!! ily sososo much <333

♡ @theartofmining ♡ hey fruit ily. like genuinely, u are so unbelievably funny that u make my ribs hurt so much. i know we’re like never rly that serious but i love u so much. as much as i joke about hating u, i really am glad we’re friends n i really look forward to becoming better friends with u. i love u a whole lot rain, i love seeing u on my dash bc ur full of good takes n funny posts

♡ @sapnaplive ♡ dream.... bonks our foreheads together... i care u so much. my other half!!! i love u with my whole little heart. u are soso cool and im so lucky to be able to call u my friend!! ur themes are always so cool, i wish i could be half as cool as them!!! ur art is also so epic like??? u are a triple threat: good at art, tumblr themes, AND minecraft building. and ur also so kind!!! u are one of the sweetest people i know, i love u so much and im so glad im friends with u!!

♡ @dreams-little-kitten ♡ corn u are so weird and i mean that in the kindest way possible. u are so cryptic n i love that so much about u. ur like the wilbur to my philza sometimes and i think thats so awesome. that one time u came into my inbox to talk shit about that one cuphead boss was so funny and absurd, i loved that so much. i love You so much. i love how ur just so effortlessly funny, n im so glad i can be friends with u

♡ @dreamsmp ♡  JEL!!!! i love u so much holy cow. u are so sweet!! all the time!!! ur also so talented, ur gifs always look so good!!! i love being friends with u, ur always so nice to me n u always leave rly nice tags when u reblog my gif sets that make me so happy!!! i think about that one time u rbed my fundy gif set n said “FUNDY GIFS” and “GIFS BY FUNDY” it made me so happy!!! i love u a whole lot, im so glad we’re friends :)

♡ @leaguelol ♡ damien!! i love u so much u funky little cryptid!! i love when u pop into the gc just to share cryptic thoughts, u are so strange but i think thats so cool of u!!! i honestly see u kinda like a lil sibling, im always so proud of u when i see ur art on my dash!! u are so talented at art!! i love u so much n i love being ur friend, ur rly sweet n i love seeing u on my dash and in the gc!!

♡ @its5undy ♡ idk why im putting u on this, ur my mortal enemy. jkjk, i actually love u a lot clay! i love joking around with u, ur so funny and for what. im so glad u joined the gc bc i love talking to you so much!! i still love that one time u reblogged that fwt gif set n tagged me in it moments after I reblogged it. i love that u thought about me, that rly warms my heart! i love being friends with u sososo much

♡ @cavalreee ♡ oh hey, another great big fruit!! i dont think we talk all that often, which is a shame, bc ur so sweet!! and also so fucking funny, why is everyone in this friend group so fucking funny, its not fair. i love seeing u on my dash talking with ur other friends, u always have the funniest convos ever. also? ur desktop theme is SO epic, it threw me off the first time i saw it but its so swaggy, just like u!! i love u soso much azzie, n i hope we can talk more in the future bc ur so cool

♡ @technosoot ♡ i love u even tho ur a br*t /j /j /j. jannat u are so unbelievably sweet. im so glad u joined the gc bc u are such a kind presence both in there and on my dash! u radiate very Warm, Friend energy. ur friend shaped. i love u so much n i love being friends with u!! im very eager to become closer friends with u bc u seem like a really amazing friend to have

♡ @sortasortaspicy ♡ les where are u in the gc i miss u </3 i love u so much, u fit in so well from the very beginning n brought so much more fun and laughter into the gc. i dont know u all that well n i dont think we’ve talked one on one like. at all. but id love to get closer to u bc ur so rad and ur so sweet!!

♡ EPIC PEOPLE  ♡

(aka mutuals who are so cool n id love to be friends with u pls talk to me)

@eurytherm ♡ @vampkings ♡ @weelbur ♡ @wilburtheesoot ♡ @quackityskarl ♡ @wimblrscoot ♡ @technofarmer ♡ @wooteena ♡ @bloodforblood ♡ @smpsapnap ♡ @literallynotfound ♡ @hearty-an0n ♡ @enderanboo ♡ @springbonniecpu ♡ @pandascanpvp ♡ @tommylnnits ♡ @strawberrygogy ♡ @timedeo ♡ @nymika-arts ♡ @h-isforhome ♡ @eboykarl ♡ @joe-alkaysani ♡ @betwecouldmakesome ♡ @squirrelstone ♡ @maddieandchimney

[xnchxntmxnt]

Boys Don't Cry

Oikawa Tooru

not an x reader fic just a vent fic lol

Hahaaaaa oikawa kinnie moments

Anyway im ✨ sad ✨and projecting onto fictional characters

Im not having a mental breakdown, oikawa is. it’s fine. We good.

Tw// cursing (esp at the beginning), maybe almost anxiety attack? I dont know if you’d call it that. Repressed emotions. Lots of them. Not proofread.

boys don't cry by the cure

So I try to laugh about it

“Fuck, fuck, shit--where’s my phone, shit, where’s my god damn phone--”

“Captain?”

“Hey, shittykawa, you good?”

“Fine!” Oikawa snapped, pulling his phone out of his gym bag. He didn’t intend to sound angry--of course he didn’t, Kindaichi hadn’t done anything to upset him. Neither had Iwaizumi. Then why did he feel like this? Why did he sound so angry, why did he feel like every squeak of a sneaker against the floor and every word someone said to him was a poke at his already-disappearing composure?

“Sorry, that was rude of me,” he continued, taking a breath. He bowed to Kindaichi (who had gotten the worst of his lashing out) and shook his head. “It has been a very long day. My apologies. Let’s just get back to practice, yeah?”

No one questioned him after that, but he could see the worried glances shot his way through the rest of the night.

Cover it all up with lies

Things only got worse. He was losing his rhythm--tripping over his own two feet, missing sets, zoning out at random moments. It got so bad towards the end of practice during a scrimmage, he face-planted in the middle of the gym. In front of the whole team. Because he stepped on a ball he needed to go pick up.

Iwaizumi was the first to run over to make sure he was alright. Even if he acted like he hated him some days, he knew they were as close of friends as you could get.

This wasn't something his friends could help him with, however.

“Oi, ‘kawa, are you okay?” he asked, tossing the ball to Kunimi to put away. He knelt down next to him in an attempt to help him up.

However, Oikawa barely heard the question. His ears were ringing and he could barely see from the tears that were threatening to fall from his face.

I try to laugh about it

“Fine,” he said, trying to keep the most composure he could at the moment. He knew he didn’t sound fine, but that was besides the point. He stood up without using Iwaizumi’s help (although he had to catch him from falling again when he stumbled) and broke into a stupid smile. A broken, stupid smile. He didn't know why he was smiling. There was no reason for him to be--he just embarrassed himself in front of the entire volleyball team and could barely walk on his own.

The gym was dead silent besides his snickering at himself. Oikawa took the opportunity to wipe his eyes free of tears and turned to the coach. “I’ll be back in a moment, excuse me,” he said, not giving anyone a chance to argue before walking out of the gym.

Hiding the tears in my eyes

He went to the club room where he knew he could be alone for a couple minutes--no one was going to walk in there unless it was someone on the team. And they wouldn't either--not right now. Not when he very clearly wanted to be left alone.

He always wanted to be left alone. He had his friends in volleyball and his adoring fangirls, even his teammates he wasn’t as close with. But he never wanted to be with them anymore. Everyone got on his nerves with the little things they did, no matter what they did. They could be trying to help him or even asking if he’s okay, but it would just irritate him. Even Iwaizumi.

Oikawa sighed, trying to collect his thoughts. He couldn’t break down now, he had to get back to practice. But his legs shook so bad, almost all of his weight was on the table in the center of the club room. If he tried to go back now, everything would be worse.

What was that trick Mattsun had mentioned one day? Something about numbers. Breathe in...4, was it? Hold seven, out eight. He repeated that several times until the tears stopped and he could stand by himself.

Oikawa turned to the club room door, looking in the window as a mirror. His eyes were red and puffy and his hair was a mess, but that was a simple fix. He splashed some cold water on his face and wiped it with his shirt, and played with his hair till it looked normal again.

'Cause boys don't cry

Nevertheless, he’d carry on with a smile. He couldn't cry. Not now. He needed to do his best. Not when people were relying on him.

Boys don’t cry

[varusai]

who do you think is the most dateable dark matter thief?? i know you have an opinion and i need to hear it

sorry for the late response anon i honestly had to think abt this one for a few days lmao, but yeah i have opinions. below the cut bc fr i have opinions, all of them have major pros and cons (based on my characterization at least) and really i just have to break it down for u

Boros, everyones obvious first choice, but certainly not mine.

Pros: rich, tall, pretty, fun af, passionate, will kill for you np, give you anything you want, literally anything.

cons: has a god complex, doesnt respect you, not his number one priority at all, will forget about you once its not interesting for him anymore, probably argumentative/combative af, is very very smart and has no problem manipulating you in all the worst ways, is very entitled so he will never feel bad about anything, cant win arguments either bc he’ll want to settle it with combat, will get offended over little things just to argue bc he thinks thats fun

this is a relationship you’d get into if you literally have nothing to lose and dont care about your mental health. like hes hot but this shit would be toxic af and he will ruin your life and leave you to go fuck around and fight someone on the other side of the universe. this will be the best of times and the worst of times for you and you will never be the same afterward mentally or emotionally. the only way i would even consider it is if i lost my damn mind. The only way a relationship with him would ever work long term is if you were physically stronger than him and were capable of putting him in his place OR you were smart enough, suicidal enough, and interesting enough to him to engage in some psychological warfare and reject him if he asked you. Make him chase you for years, say yes, then decide that /he’s/ boring /you/ and leave him for another member of the squad to just destroy their established hierarchy and humble him to the point that he’s obsessed with you.

i dont have the energy for all that, so i’ll just smash and pass.

0/10 completely undateable

Geryuganshoop, also a probable second choice for many:

pros: cute, nice, tentacle alien (obviously), will respect you np, will also give you anything you want, not antagonistic at all, telepathic communication so no risk of miscommunication, emotionally intelligent and available, loyal to a fault,

cons: horrible boss/best friend that you will have to listen to him vent about for at least 3 hours a day, complete yes man as well so he will not tell boros no or cut him off and you will be stuck dealing with this no matter what, severely mentally ill and wont go to therapy bc he thinks hes handling it well, workaholic, needs a lot, and i mean A LOT of attention

this relationship would be great if not for boros lol. boros sabotages his social and romantic life but geryu has been friends with him too long to either cut him off or establish boundaries. he has no backbone (figuratively and literally) and wouldnt even consider it. he’ll ignore you in favor of his job too, to a massive degree. also i think that while the telepathic communication would be a major plus in most cases, here i feel like i’d have no less than 16 different, never before seen on earth, mental illnesses projected right into my brain just from being within a certain radius of him.

im already fucked up enough in that sense so pass unfortunately.

it would be a yes without boros in the picture tho lmao

so prob like 4/10 iffy datablillity, 1 level increase with each decade of therapy he gets tho so a lot of potential :D

Groribas, my fav girl:

pros: straightforward, realistic, very clear expectations, will not fuck around with you whatsoever like there is no mind games or anything here, will kill for you, rich and non materialistic so she’ll basically just let you do whatever with her money since she doesn t care about it, cares about her job but like...a normal amount. she absolutely has a good work/life balance, highly organized so she will not forget important dates, loyal af and will defend your honor under any circumstances, mean but in a funny way, a ton of fun to hang out with if you’re into that, no eyes so i dont have to worry abt eye contact ever

cons: extremely high expectations, like exhaustingly high, and not even a bit of flexibility there, if you dont meet the cut its a no, she’ll let you know and leave same day, she will also bully you, you need a thick skin and great sense of humor to survive, bad at feelings if you need emotional support???? go elsewhere, shes mega emotionally unavailable, will probably want to share bodies as a form of intimacy

overall its a solid 6.5/10 dateability for me i love the directness and no bs approach, we would def get along well. however, while im not sensitive, shes def gonna hit on some insecurities at some point and it will cause an argument lol. but i mean whatever. it happens. the body sharing would be an issue though, same reason i wouldnt be chill with having a symbiote despite being a major venom fucker. i need my space i cant deal with that. so thats a possible deal breaker if she couldnt get over that lol. and she wont, so we wouldnt work out. i wish it fuckin would tho😭😭😭 i would take whatever crumbs of attention she would be willing to give me

Melzalgald, my fav they/them bastard:

pros: amorphous and shapeshifting aka extremely attractive according to my taste in monsters, tall af but could chose to be a more reasonable survivable size lol, self contained and self-entertaining so they dont need a ton of attention to be happy, funny af, rich, will give you whatever you want and probably a bunch of shit you didnt know you wanted, very fun, built in friend group if you didnt already have friends, extremely emotionally intelligent and great people skills due to living in a collective, stupid af by choice, like some of em are very smart, but they dont claim that, will say fuck work and tell boros to eat shit to spend time with you, will kill for you as well, but only if you ask them to bc their first inclination is to just bother someone to death, very loyal, once they like you they like you really forever, it would take some pretty extreme circumstances to make them dislike you

cons: annoying af and its unavoidable, will talk over you, all of them at once will talk over you and do so loudly, no respect for personal space, they dont even know what that is, will probably accidentally manhandle you, they act stupid but arent so they can be manipulative, even if it isnt bad and they dont really mean to be, impulsive, forgetful of the needs of organic creatures so they will bother you at all hours of the day and night if you arent firm with boundaries, disgustingly extroverted and will bring randoms to your place without asking, or just...make new cluster members and you have to roll with it, will eat or absorb literally anything you have, will antagonize and bother you for fun, major jump scare risk since sometimes the forms are....fleshy

this ones hard for me like theyre hot af and i feel like they’d be super fun and good partners, but god....the noise. idk how long i could deal with that lol i dont like people in my house. it would drive me up the wall, but then again...i can simply kick them out when ive had enough. they arent projecting mental illness directly into my brain or requiring me to share a body sintelligento major plus. creepy thing/symbiote style hot monster without any of the invasiveness so tbh 8/10 dateability

some people date loud annoying extroverts who dont understand personal space that /arent/ rich, loyal, or emotionally intellegent so i’d be winning on a few different fronts lmao

[sherry-l]

Why YGO Vrains is such an immeasurable disappointment: a list

First of all, I need to make it abundantly clear that Im a big fan of Vrains – I love Yusaku, Ryoken, Ai, Kusanagi... you see them very often on my dash. I fantasize about the ideal version of Vrains that’s written well, the Vrains that’s fully exploited its potentials, every night in my sleep. I wrote this list PRECISELY because I love Vrains. That’s why I got so frustrated with its cardinal writing issues (and production issues). It physically pains me to hear people calling Vrains the worst and most boring series of YGO – but the fact that I couldn’t argue against that because it’s true pains me more.

And now, an incomprehensive list of the faults of Yugioh Vrains.  

1.      What the fuck is wrong with the character designs (beside that of Yusaku and Ryoken???) Everyone looks aesthetically displeasing – characters in real life look incredibly boring they could easily drown in a crowd of background characters, but their avatars are OSTENTATIOUS. Seems like the character designer had no clue what “less is more” means – blue angel, soulburner, and Bohemann for example, look like they were immersed in a bucket of glue and then dumped into another bucket filled with random accessories.

(from a fan artist’s perspective…Im especially salty about takeru, akira, Kusanagi, and the Knights of Hanois’ designs…like, their designs don’t inspire me to draw. Their personalities might be interesting, but their looks lack the vibrant, enthusiastic energy that the 5Ds, Zexal, and Arc-V characters possess)

(imagine how many fanfics and fanarts of Kusanagi x Yusaku there would be had Kusanagi looked HALF as hot as Ryoken)

And don’t even get me started on the colour palette – whoever decided on the colours just cant make up their goddamn mind! Colour saturation is way off the charts, the range of colour is too wide the audience simply dont know where to focus.

2.      Forgotten plotlines. Yusaku’s link sense? Hanoi’s spy in SOL? The Queen and the rest of the chess pieces? Yusaku’s forgotten memories? The rest of the victims of the Lost Incident? Just to name a few. 

3.      Character relationships are weak to minimal to none. Bonds and friendships – the vital element in all previous YGO series – is practically non-existent in Vrains. Where’s the camaraderie between our main casts (Yusaku, Aoi, Soulburner, Ema, Onizuka, etc…)? They don’t feel like a team fighting the evil together. They’re completely separate individuals who don’t give a single fuck if one of their…acquaintance…dies in a battle. We don’t have heartwarming moments of friendship blossoming and consolidating. It’s honestly such a let down.

4.      Interesting and debatable topics thrown away. The conflict between artificial intelligence and humans could spark so many in-depth discussions, but then the writer just decided its all Lightening’s fault. No morally gray situations, no ambiguity between the line of good and evil. It’s just all Lightening and his petty jealousy… yeah.

Oh and if Ai lives on the world will blow up. Why? Do we have a concrete reason to back that statement? eh...

5.      Overall quality of the animation. I don’t know if its because the animation staff was short on time or low on budget, but for a megacorporation (konami cough cough) that makes billions every year, they certainly are capable of investing more in this anime series. I can count the number of episodes in which the characters don’t look wacky with a single hand.

6.      Character development, wasted potentials. Ryoken is the only character who received decent treatment. The rest of the Vrains cast are all disappointments. Original concepts are cool and promising – Yusaku, a victim of child abuse with PTSD, embarking on a journey to overcome his reclusiveness and learn to open up to people around him? HELL YEAH. Aoi, a teenage idol with depression developing into a more mature and responsible heroine who saves Link Vrains? IM ALL FOR IT.  Soulburner’s character arc is fine overall but personally I don’t feel like it’s expanded enough. Also, there’s the mistreatment of side characters like Onizuka, Ema, Akira, the list goes on. I got so furious just looking at these characters and remembering that they’re all wasted and sidelined.

7.      Incoherent/ random plotlines. IDK all episodes in season 1 (Hanoi’s arc) felt pretty consistent, focusing on a linear theme – Yusaku’s revenge on the Knights of Hanoi. But after that it felt like the writers gave up writing outlines and just wrote whatever he pleased/ considered more convenient for the sake of…a plot…that he had no idea which direction it was headed for. This is reflected in the amount of forgotten plotlines we listed previously.

8.      Weak villains. Kinda related to point 4. Bohemann, Lightening, Windy, and Haru are all one-dimensional, flat, predictable villains with the cliché goal of “destroying humanity cuz humans are dumb and Ais are superior”. Not likeable, not fun to watch, not morally gray (something I expect from well-written antagonists), they are just there to serve as symbol of evil for the protags to defeat.

Honourable mentions - what I personally want to see in Vrains, really. Very biased.

-        The familial interaction between Yusaku and Kusanagi? Brotherhood, perhaps? Without any mention of Yusaku’s parents, Kusanagi is the closest Yusaku has to a brother figure. I crave for some wholesome brotherly moments between these two.

-        More slice of life episodes please.

-        The friendship between Yusaku and Takeru. Please. Please. PLEASE. From the second opening we can see the animation staff CLEARLY intended for there to be a strong bond between Yusaku and Takeru – Takeru probably was written to serve as a Jounouchi/ Johan/ Crow sort of character. Yusaku and Takeru could bond over their trauma and overcome their PTSD together. AND IT WAS SO HEAVILY HINTED AT IN THE 2ND OP!!! fam what the fuck happened to that friendship, Im so robbed.

-        Yusaku and Ryoken’s duel or tag duel. These two haven’t duelled AT ALL since the first season ended. Isn’t Ryoken Yusaku’s official rival? Isn’t it Yugioh tradition for the protag and the rival to duel like, a trillion times? AND ISNT IT ALSO A YUGIOH TRADITION FOR THE PROTAG AND THE RIVAL TO TAG DUEL?????? The fact that Yusaku and Ryoken never had a tag duel haunts me every night in my worst nightmares afjw4ot9wgrk

-        Topologina Nabee

Thanks for coming to my ted talk, this marks the end of my rant on YGO VRAINS DISAPPOINTMENTS. Again, I harboured no malicious intent when I compiled the list – its more like a vent of frustration than actual criticism. I would pay billions to see a Vrains reboot or, if there exists an alternate universe where none of the writing/production issues above are present in Vrains, I would do a Kaiba and build a dimension travelling machine and immigrate there.

TLDR: wasted potentials. wAsTED PoTEntialS. WASTED POTENTIALS!!!!!!

[reineyday]

botw vent post lmaoooo

i just spent the last THREE TO FOUR HOURS trying to get off FUCKING EVENTIDE ISLAND bc im a dumbass that just started a replay and i dont have any of the divine beasts yet and like six hearts but i was like "lmao why not im here"

ive never actually seen the island cuz in my first run through i game overed right away and dipped and actually just never finished the shrine so i was finding the ball keys without finding the altar things, yknow, like a DUMBASS and i find all three keys but only two altar things

i grab the two keys from the monster lairs cuz i dont really wanna bother the hinox until i absolutely have to, and i place the monster keys in the water altar and the altar up the hill by the one monster lair

so where's the third altar???? i need to find it before i try to steal from a hinox. i run all around the island and discover it's RIGHT BY WHERE I STOLE ONE OF THE KEYS.

all right cool whatever, at least i know where it is now right? EXCEPT. the altar is on a GODDAMN PLATEAU and i can only get back there by CLIMBING which means i cant bring a whole goddamn ball key whatever up there with me.

i decide to focus on tbis later and thieve the hinox without waking it up. okay cool, mission accomplished, but now: how to get the ball back up on the plateau??? i try for a while using stasis but i dont get a good enough angle and kill my woodcutter axe trying to get the ball somewhere. i try to find a path up to the plateau that is flat enough to take the key up without climbing and drop it so many times i yell unintelligibly at my switch. the ball key also rolls down the path and uncomfortably close to the sleeping hinox SEVERAL TIMES and i am not amused. i am, in fact, much closer to frustrated tears.

i look up walkthroughs and one guy uses mipha's grace and a well-timed bomb but as i mentioned, i dont have any of the divine beast perks yet bc i just started the game. most people say: respawn the keys. problem with that is that the key i currently have would spawn on the hinox again and i mixed the other two up getting them to the two other altar locations. respawning them both would be as good as restarting the whole thing and i dont wanna GIVE UP when im basically there!

after getting frustrated some more i decide my best bet is the stasis and bomb and i just need to find a better angle. i try several different spots several different times and then i go back up to the hill with the one altar and the monster lair, set two metal boxes and a bomb before using stasis on the key.

it goes far enough to be promising, actually, but my angle was off and the key ends up in the water by the stupid fucking plateau. i go to fetch it but it's unfortunately by a wall of rock too tall for me to toss it back onto land from a cryonis tower. i keep trying to shepherd the key back to the shore but it keeps rolling off the goddamn cryonis towers and back into the water and floating farther from shore.

in a fit of frustration, i decide to use stasis and a bomb on top of a cryonis tower just to launch the stupid key back onto land or at LEAST close enough to shore that it wont get caught between stupidly tall rock walls and cryonis towers.

i am too frustrated to remember to properly switch special ability apps.

so after more than three hours of nearly dying from random fucking octoroks, those stypid lightning chuchus that explode when you kill them, getting burned by fire chuchus, having to kill camps of monsters not once but TWICE bc i was there so long a BLOOD MOON HAPPENED, avoiding the moblin and hinox bc i am a noob with six hearts and nothing in my pockets but wooden weapons, simmered fruit and will power--after more than three hours of trying to get a STUPID BALL-SHAPED KEY TO EXPLODE IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION--

i press L to use stasis on the stupid key but forget to switch from bomb+ to stasis, thus exploding MYSELF into a game over 🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃

it wasnt even the monsters! it was me!!!! i spent so long on this stupid island trying to do it in one go so i'd never have to go back, i intentionally chose not to restart the whole island--thus respawning all the keys in the right places--for the specific reason that i was almost finished and it must mean SOMETHING that i survived all those monsters, and in the end it was me. i did it to myself.

and now in the game the last 3+ hours of work i spent on the goddamn island just. didnt happen.

and all i learned aside from what NOT to do on fucking eventide sland was that cooked hearty ingredients by themselves are still pretty useful.

but. why. why did u make that plateau inaccessible by walking, game developers? why. why did u hide the altar underneath a stupid door so i didnt immediately see it? why did i think it was a good idea to round up all the keys before finding all the altars?

it is 2:47 am. just. w h y.

[plainvanillapotato]

the 100 diaries S2 E12

quarantine: may 31 2020

season 2 episode 12: “Rubicon”

the guy is running. watch he just die and no one gets clarkes message. i would love it if clarkes plane just backfired but of course they save him. 

ok but wait why was cage just random carrying a oxygen tank when he himself doesnt even need one.

tsing out here with her own personal army. then just plucking these kids one by one. damn 

these grounders really be listening to clarke just because lexa said so?? damn these grounders be loyal minus gustus and that one guy that tried to kill clarke but then got eaten by king kong

is raven really the only person out here doing all this crap?? like does clarke not realize how big of an ask shes asking of raven? raven is magic and shit but she has some limitations just to be somewhat realistic. just chill the fuck out clarke raven is doing the best out here arguably more than clarke.

i love how bellamy is still wearing that hat still looking like sean malto. but also how has someone not noticed him? but i guess bellamy like joe from you as in if he wears a hat he magically blends in.

“...all of this is for nothing” way to put pressure on prettyboy bellamy like he didnt already know that. chill clarke everyone is trying their best out here. ngl i would hate to have clarke as a manager cuz i think she would micromanage the shit out of people. 

remember in the last episode when clarke asked what her job was well i think that i figured it out:

i also wanna mention that finn literally died idk less than a week ago but clarkes in charge being out and about commanding people years her senior. i get that we had that whole episode dedicated to how finns death affects clarke but still she got over that pretty quick. a little too quick. but i guess that if youre a sky person your emotional metabolism is just through the fucking roof...

ooo clarke still be salty toward her mom. but yeah kane is kinda an enabler

but why do these people have clear paper. the art department is feeling themselves on that one. like is it because they wanted to be edgy and futuristic or is it from an actual realistic viewpoint that the space people dont have trees to create paper................does this also mean that the space people didnt have toilet paper???????? but also back to the paper thing did these kids never learn how to write in cursive??? since i would imagine actual writing utensils are limited so idk if they waste it on teaching kids cursive. actually tho does anyone have an answer to these questions??? 

where did jaha get that antler stick. i kinda want one. i like to imagine that he just saw it lying somewhere on their way to the desert and said to himself i would look epic holding that stick and then went to pick up and started using it even tho he doesnt actually need a walking stick....any hunter x hunter fans?

jaha’s mask at 8:29 is an example of what not to wear during corona season

“thanks for the water?”...while looking down a bit flustered ”its, uh..it was no problem” emori and murphy? ship?

bellamy crawling through air vents to save the day...magenta from sky high who??

also bellamy’s ear piece is giving me everything. *i know that the following meme is just a tiny phone but i just really like it so idgaf

again with the inaccuracy of bone marrow extraction.

but what really gets me is clarke recognizing what procedure is going o just by the sound of a drill. ok who is she? she be like the boy that can identify a vacuum just by the sound. For those that don’t know what I’m talking about:

https://youtu.be/Ar5nLNku0CM

A missile?? where did these people get a missile

But also imagine if clarke was like actually i didn’t catch any of that conversation and bellamy just had to recap it like Luis in ant-man. I would die

thats a lot to ask of raven clarke. Like i could never get that shit done no matter how long you gave me. Yeah ppl be screwed if i was part of the 100

That hug btw Clarke and raven...ship? Jk i know it was just a friendship hug but yah can never know with these writers. Like i honestly wouldn’t be surprised if the writers said enemies (being part of that love triangle with finn) to friends to lovers

murphy and emori are definitly a ship. walking together behind with everyone else. Murphy said “i killed two people. I had my reasons but nobody cared.” Fuck you murphy you killed them cuz you a salty bitch. I also hate how he says this so blasé. Like dude want?? Ugh. Ugh. Ugh. Murphy also said im the bad guy. Murphy is a billie elish fan?? Duh.

woah when that girl pulled out her claw????? I fell out of my seat. its actually huge. she could grab a whole basket all. They did a great job concealing/ not drawing attention to her hand before like i was so fucking surprised.

“Its pretty badass” and murphy looking at that claw tho...murphy is into kinky shit. But also that look he gave her while she walked away that was the most genuine look I’ve ever seen out of murphy.

Bellamy shoving jasper into a wall and whispering...bellamy and jasper? ship?

this secret talk between bellamy and Dante....bellamy and president Dante? ship?

But i also like to imagine that during this meeting that bellamy has the song dont be suspious. Dont be suspious playing in his head

woah. Mountain man said inconito mode activated. Reminds me of one of those green soldiers in toy story especially during the opening scene of i think the first movie

This character development in clarke is something else like remember when she talked about the grounders wanting finn out in the open and not in private causing a huge public uproar. Look at her now talking in private with Lexa about the missile. Phenomenal character growth if you ask me.

they really put all their eggs in one basket with bellamy. But bellamy be a really good basket tho. Trust Lexa trust.

where tf did this guy get an RPG??

Woah Emori be the real bad guy. But honestly she could slit Murphy’s throat and he would still live because cockroaches can still live without their head.

raven you should have just shut up. You really dropped the ball there.

lincoln???? What are the chances??? Isn’t he still a druggie?? Honestly octavias little speech would not motivate me at all. If anything it would make me want to take more drugs. At this point i would just say to Lincoln “dont fight it”

i like how they took everything but they let jaha keep his stick.

caspian is reall dressed like a hipster that sells artisanal kombucha

Jaha really has some faith in murphy...jaha and murphy? ship?

Also that was a really good shot of them murphy, jaha, and their crew climbing up the hill with a giant moon in the background

Lexa is giving me padme vibez wearing that head scarf like that

they were going to let kane and indra die

yeah sorry to break it to you abby but your child is a killer but then again so are you sooo..you really cant be out here to judge your kid like that. Like mother like daughter. But you really cant lecture clarke on this. you literally gave your husband up and you let your daughter blame her best friend for it. And on top of this you were part of the council that sent 100 kid down to earth without even knowing if earth was survivable. ma’m get the fuck outta here.

but all those lives for bellamy. i think its worth it. Because bellamy is worth everything.

theyre linking arms they got monty no!! absolutely not. they took jasper but i gotta say better he than monty bc Monty is king. Yeah jasper really fumbled with that gun. Really not smart. jasper should have just shot tsing instead

Oof a containment breach. wow what an epic door stop. Sooo loong tsing. That was such a cruel death tho but yeah she kinda deserved it.

Does Dante play the cello?? A real renaissance man isn’t he?

wow this makes octaiva and lincoln like an epic couple that conquered the world. power couple. Goals *gag* but ok does that mean that Lincoln just stopped cold turkey just like that?? Hes just automatically better? No this is not how drug addiction works. But ok sure Jan.

[feisty-fae]

If you still do the flower ask thingys.. 👉👈 𝘼𝙡𝙡 𝙤𝙛 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙢 𝙜𝙤 :)

HoooH boY hEre we gO-

Alisons: Sexuality?

I sexually identify as a can of beans

Amaranth: Pronouns/Gender?

Cis female she/her

Amaryllis: Birthday?

27 September

Anemone: Favorite flower?

All flowers pretty,, but stargazer lily, rose, dahlia and cherry blossoms

Angelonia: Favorite t.v. show?

I don't watch tv but I'll list some other stuff i like to watch:mha, beastars and aggretsuko

Arum-Lily: What’s the farthest you’d go for a stranger?

Idk depends on scenario??

Aster: What’s one of your favorite quotes?

"Kanye West he likes, fingers in his ass."

Aubrieta: Favorite drink?

Any Milkshakes or smoothies (mostly banana and strawberry for milkshake and p much anything for smoothie)

Baby’s Breath: Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

I've never had kith

Balsam Fir: Have you ever been in love?

Well you see yes but actually no

Baneberries: Favorite song?

I listen to a lot but to keep it short:baby in the kitchen, in my mouth and friends slowed (chase atlantic)

Basket of Gold: Describe your family.

We p chill fam

Beebalm: Do you have a best friend? Who is it?

Irl bestie,, shes not on tumblr lol

Begonia: Favorite color?

PinKKK

But i like most colours

Bellflower: Favorite animal?

Cats,,,,

FoxES,

ANYTHING CUDDLY AND CUTE

Bergenia: Are you a morning or night person?

Night

Black-Eyed Susan: If you could be any animal for a day, what would it be?

I'd be like a doggo bc it would be the most fun i think-

Bloodroots: When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?

I wanted to be a vet but then when my granny asked me "but whos gonna clean up the animal poop?" I was like "eWW pO0pP!" and then decided that mayb i shouldn't be a vet

Bluemink: What are your thoughts on children?

They're either really kind and sweet

Or literal demons from hell

Legit no inbetween

Blazing Stars: What are you afraid of? Is there a reason why?

I'm afraid of lot of things-

Borage: Give a random fact about your childhood.

I was one dumbass bitcg-

Bugleherb: How would you spend your last day on Earth?

Idk eat pizza and cry or smth ajakamkw

Buttercup: Relationship Status?

Single

Camelia: If you could visit anywhere, where would you want to go?

NEW YORKKK, CONCRETE JUNGLE WHERE DREAMS ARE MADE OFFF THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN'T DO NOW YOU'RE IN NEW YOOORKKK

Candytufts: When do you feel most loved?

When someone hugs me or just generally spends time with me

Canna: Do you have any tattoos?

Nop

Canterbury Bells: Do you have any piercings?

I used to have piercings when i was a bab but eHh haven't worn them since and i dont think my ear holes are big enough now-

California Poppy: Height?

4'10 grrr I'm the omega midget and I'll devour ur ankles

Cardinal Flower: Do you believe in ghosts?

Nop

Carnation: What are you currently wearing?

Pant, pink top and black hoodie

Catnip: Have you ever slept with a nightlight?

I think i have??

Chives: Who was the last person you hugged?

My mom and my dad

Chrysanthemum: Who’s the last person you kissed?

I never kith

Cock’s Comb: Favorite font?

I dont have one so imma say sans bc it always looks out of place and makes me laugh-

Columbine: Are you tired?

No

I feel like screaming and jumping around my room like a crackhead

Common Boneset: What are you looking forward to?

Nothing in particular ig

Coneflower: Dream job?

Smth kinda fun and art or design related hopefully,,,,

Crane’s-Bill: Introvert or extrovert?

Introvert but i also get lonley easily

Crocus: Have you ever been in love?

Nop,,,,

Crown Imperial: What’s the farthest you would go for someone you care about?

I would get run over by 5 monster trucks, jump off a plane, get mauled by 10 bears, get trampled on by a stampede, get brutally tortured for 12 hours straight, yeet myself into the Grand Canyon and then break all my bones with my bare hands if they weren't broken already

Ok basically i care a lot

Cyclamen: Did you have a favorite stuffed animal as a child? What was it?

I had this st bernard plush called Sparky and this lion named Sammy,,

Daffodil: What’s your zodiac sign?

Libra

Dahlia: Have you done anything worth remembering?

My memory is legit so bad it's probably concerning uHHH

Daisy: What do you feel is your greatest accomplishment?

Mayb art??

Daylily: What would you do if your parents didn’t like your partner(s)?

Ehhh i might reason with them and then if they still disagreed I'd just keep the relationship a secret

Dendrobium: Who is the last person that you said “I love you” to?

My parents

False Goat’s Beard: What is something you are good at?

Ehhh arT

Foxgloves: What’s something you’re bad at?

EhhHh everything that isn't art-

Freesia: What are three good things that have happened in the past month?

Oh boy here comes my shitty memory-

Hmmm

Idk but I'm mostly happy that I've been more social and stuff and i feel like im kinda coming out of my shell a bit

Not sure what to say for other 2 bc nothing in particular has really happend?

Garden Cosmos: How was your day today?

Ehhh oK??

Gardenia: Are you happy with where you’re at in your life?

Mayhapsn't

Gladiolus: What is something you hope to do in the next year or two?

I hope to pass all my exams and get an okish job mayb

Glory-of-the-Snow: What are ten things that make you happy/you’re grateful to have in your life?

1.fRIENBS ILY MY HABIBIS

2. Fammm

3. eHhh yummy food,,

4. Drawing and uhhh art

5. EPIC MUTUALS

6. Ok idk what else aside from like serious stuff like house and etc.-

Heliotropium: What helps you calm down when you feel stressed?

Drawing, crying, venting to a friend/parent

Hellebore: How do you show affection?

Hugssss,kith,cuddle, *draws u stuff*

Hoary Stock: What are you proudest of?

MmmmmMy aRRt?

Hollyhock: Describe your ideal day.

Wake up

Don't go to school

Vibe with friends

Sleeb

Hyacinth: What do you like to do in your free time?

MmMmMM aRT-

Hydrangea: How long have you known your best friend? How did you meet them?

Ehh 8yrs? We met in hell school

Irises: Who can you talk to about (almost) everything?

Friendos

Mom

Laceleaf: How many friends do you have?

6..?? Aa idk theres some people that idk if they'd consider me a friend or not,,

Lantanas: What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received?

Idk any compliment is best compliment for me,,

Larkspur: What do you think of yourself?

Ew yucky gröss

Lavender: What’s your favorite thing about yourself?

m y a r t

Also my hair bc its soft and wavy,,

Leather Flower: What’s your least favorite thing about yourself?

Everything else-

Lilac: What’s something you liked to do as a child?

Climb trees and do dumb shit

Lily: Who was your best friend when you were a kid?

Same irl bestie i mentioned before

Lily of the Incas: What is something you still feel guilty for?

MmmmmmMMM,,,

Lily of the Nile: What is something you feel guilty for that you shouldn’t feel guilty about?

MMMmMMmMMMMmmmMMm,,,,,,

Lupine: What does your name mean? Why is that your name?

Well I chose Fae bc i thought it sounded pretty

Marigold: Where did you grow up? Tell us about it.

Idk what to rlly say lmao

Morning Glory: What was your bedroom like growing up?

Kinda the same but i had toys everywhere-

Also when i was like 5 i had this legit fucking cursed thomas the tank engine shaped bed that i actually found a pic of but it's FUCKING HORRIFYING SO I PROBS WONT SHOW HERE-

Mugworts: What was it like for you as a teenager? Did you enjoy your teenage years?

EW BEING A TEENAGER SUCKS ASS HOW DO I UNDO????

Norwegian Angelica: Tell us about your mom.

Hi mom ily ur epic

Onions: Tell about your dad.

Hi dad ily ur epic

Orchid: Tell about your grandparents.

Omg i miss my grannies sm bc i couldn't see em this year bc nasty pandemic

Pansy: What was your most memorable birthday? What made it be so memorable?

Haha shit memory gor brrRR-

I don't really remember too many specific parties but when i was like 7-10 i had these epic parties in those birthday places with the giant play areas

I kinda wish i wasn't too old to go to them sobs

Peony: What was your first job?

I haven't had a job yet

Petunia: If you’re in a relationship, how did you meet your partner(s)? If you’re not in a relationship, how did you meet your crush/how do you hope to meet your future partner(s), if you want any?

Hmmmm idk? I haven't really thought abt that but i don't really mind i just wanna find someone to vibe with,,

Pincushion: How do you deal with pain?

I cri

Pink: Where is home?

Home is home home

Plantain Lilies: If you could go back in time, what is one thing you would stop/change?

Now where do i start...

Prairie Gentian: Who is someone you look up to? Describe them.

I look up to people that are kind, caring, brave, funny, cool or stronger than me ig?

Primrose: Describe your ideal life.

Basically my current life minus school, stress,pandemic and responsibilities lmao

Rhodendron: What is something you used to believe in as a child?

I used to believe in ghosts after i thought i encountered one

Ricinus: Who’s the most important in your life?

Hermmmst

Rose: What’s your favorite sound?

Peoples laughsss also music

Rosemallows: What’s your favorite memory?

Bro i dont have one,, my aphantasia makes it hard for me to remember stuff-

Sage: What’s your least favorite memory?

A

Snapdragon: At this moment, what do you want?

I wantttt better chargersss thattt donttt telll meee thatt myyy tablett will finishh chargingg innn 1 dayy andd 7 hoursss

St. John’s Wort: Is it easy or difficult for you to express how you feel about things?

Kinda difficult but im opening up more

Sunflower: What is something you don’t want to imagine life without?

fRIENDS,,,,,wAh

Sweet Pea: How much sleep did you get last night?

8 hrs

Tickseed: What’s your main reason to get up every morning?

Idk ig i kinda have to go to school and do stuff

Touch-Me-Not: How do you feel about your current job?

Non existant

Transvaal Daisy: What’s your favorite item of clothing?

My black and white stripy top, and all my hoodiess

Tropical White Morning Glory: Describe your aesthetic.

I don't think i have just one aesthetic bc im drawn to so many different aesthetics at the same time-

Like vintage, neon, dark, spoopy, pastel, cute, etc etc

Tulip: What would be the best present to get you?

OMG I LEGIT JUST SCREAM AT ANYTHING ANYONE GIVES ME-

IF SOMEONE GOES OUT OF THEIR WAY TO MAKE ME SMTH I CRY,,

Vervain: What’s stressing you out most right now?

🤏

Wisteria: How many books have you read in the past few months? What were they called?

I haven't been reading anythinggg

But i should really finish reading Percy Jackson bc it do be picking up dust-

Wolf’s Bane: Where do you want to be in life this time next year?

Everywhere

Yarrow: Do you know what vore is?

Mmm yummy 👅

Zinnia: Give a random fact about yourself.

I am currently living and breathing yes

[punkcryptids]

ramble

this is the one form of social media i can vent on and be confident no one is gonna find it, it won’t start drama and i can just go the fuck off

i have this ex friend right? really mf toxic, i cut her off last year n shit is all good, right?

anyways, last week i found out she has been consistently posting abt me on her tik tok, just indirects, since aT LEAST may, probably longer. and i told her the fuck off, made my own shit behind “obsessed” by mariah carrey, after some comments back n forth, the whole incident is said n done, she blocks me. ok cool

here i am, finding out the bitch is *still* making indirects. its a lil less obvious, so of course there’s the possibility it’s not me but knowing the situation im p sure it is-- the caption was like “if you side w someone because they’re crying but dont care about what they did, i hate you” or something like that. and im just at my wits end dude,, (a tiny bit of context; our friend group completely left her when i did, n all of them commented on my video + people who were kinda in our friend group but not completely if that makes sense-- one of the kinda in the group ppl commented on her video n she responded “wtf did i ever do to you” so thats why i think the caption has to do w me)

it doesnt make me as anxious as it used to but it makes me angry dude. n the indirects were really fuckin wild. im not tryna explain the situation too much because it was a whole year of verbal/mental abuse that i somewhat tuned out because *trauma*, but she was making wholeass posts abt my relationship. thats what is was, each n every time. 

makes sense bc it was the whole fucking issue when we were friends, but they were straight lies. shit abt how he cheated on me and-- she KNOWS its not true. SHE KNOWS, the whole issue is she was overly involved in my relationship because we were both her best friends.  

the whole reason this incident happened in the first place was because two days before i made my thing calling her out, she posted ANOTHER indirect. idk how many of yall are on tiktok, but it was the trend “introduce yourself as why you and your ex bsf dont talk” and gUeSs wHaT iT SaID?? “i dont like when my friends get cheated on”. its amazing the mental gymnastics she has to go through to feel correct in the situation. AMAZING. making up whole ass events that didnt happen (when we had our lil confrontation she cited him cheating on me when WE WERENT TOGETHER dnkjfheifjoewi) 

god this probably reads so weirdly because its a random insight to a situation without full context + it jumps all over. im sorry about that i just physically cannot dude. im a legal adult next year, class of 2021 babey and it fucking blows my mind theres still this middle school drama bs going on. and i cant do shit, because all she will do is block me when i call her out on her bs and then continue to post abt it. when it first happened it made me feel happy and relieved that i stood up for myself for once but then finding out shes doing the same shit shes just a fucking coward.

ig whats sending me more is the one comment she left on my video was “bell would you like to say this to my face” n then BLOCKED ME N CONTINUED TO SHIT TALK I-

i know i need to work on letting it not bother me-- she will talk her shit, she will spew her lies, and at least all of the people who were there for the situation know shes wrong-- n thats all that matters. but anxiety is a bitch sometimes. plus i guess it just hurts, she was such a gaslighting, manipulative person n it fucking hurts to see her lie and turn that shit on me. esp because my mind is littered with mental instability that i will start to bELIEVE IT HDhnfiujfo. it makes me mad that i have to deal with the trauma she gave me n she gets to sit there making tik toks lying about what happened to strangers online to validate her. what bothers me even more is it wasnt even about our relationship really. it was just about MY relationship with my boyfriend which feels so fucking weird. especially bc half of her tiktoks are directed at calling me a bad person (+saying how much better she is than me lmao) n missing my bf (who she calls her “brother” even though she gaslit him and manipulated him all the same djifhbdi) and the other half is like she misses me ??? considering the latest indirect (before she blocked me) was abt why we arent friends anymore

i cannot stress enough how fucking done i am. it stresses me out because i cut her out of my life so i wouldnt have to deal w it and i feel like i cant escape her and i hate it i want to move out of this fuckign town so i never have to have the possibility of running into her 

but if i do run into her you bet your ass im calling her pussy ass out >:) 

also shoutout my therapist who will get the run down (probably a summary of this post) of this situation tomorrow hehe 

[lowplainlowinthemorning]

@yung-tamale tagged me for this and I’m actually gonna respond lolll

name: Liv/Curt

nicknames: i absolutely don’t have any other than ‘hey this picture of pj harvey made me think of you’ which is sexy

zodiac: Cancer

height: 5’6”

languages: sadly only English. i May need to learn Italian eventually for undisclosed reasons

nationality: American. i wish it were anything else

favorite season: S U M M E R

favorite flower: hyacinths, roses, irises, morning glories, day lillies, snowdrops, clover flower, daffodils, cherry blossoms, dogwood flowers, and anything I ever saw in my grandmother’s garden

favorite scent: bleach, dad’s cologne, mom’s shampoo, rain, uh. girls

favorite fictional character: OK MM

Curt Wild is part of the reason why I’m currently going by Curt and it’s bc he’s handsome and stupid and people keep hurting him like me

Brian Slade is the actual definition of what I would look like ideally and we’re both bottoms who believe we’re otherworldly and important with 0 evidence other than ego

Mark Renton is also the definition of what I would look like ideally and I feel such a strong connection to his miserable cunt life that idk how to watch Trainspotting 1 or 2 without crying

Orlando in the 1992 film is me but masc and they get a crush on this dark haired foreign girl that throws them into a YEARS LONG poetic depression & then have sex w a dick 1 time & have a daughter like same :/

Tommy Gnosis/Hedwig Robinson bc I’m the definition of their chaotic blend of stupid, horny, and philosophical

Euchrid Eucrow from And The Ass Saw The Angel is honestly one of the most relatable characters in existence and his internal monologue and how he feels abt himself and views the world is exactly how I’ve felt more and more as I’ve gotten older

Dorian Gray is who I would be if I could make my life the way I wanted it. I ruined your life and I’m a sexy twink. oops 💋

Harley Quinn,, I don’t feel like I have to explain Harley Quinn. me

coffee, hot tea, or hot chocolate?: coffee or hot chocolate tea is for the English

average sleep: 7 hours usuallyfjdjdndn

dogs or cats: cats 🐈

number of blankets: quilt, top cover being fleece blanket, covering ur entire body lest you fall prey to some demon ur anxiety pulled out of Hereditary

dream trip: I wanna go to London literally so bad, and Seattle and San Francisco And Berlin and. yknow. all the gay haunts.

blog established: dec. 2017, but I’ve been here since dec. 2015

random fact: when I was a kid I got so obsessed with the game Wolf Quest that when I finished it and got separated from my last pup, Snow, who id formed an actual maternal bond with, I became depressed for three months. one of the reasons I didn’t actively try to destroy myself at the end of 2017 was bc they’d announced Wolf Quest 3. i am a fucking furry

Gender: androgynous(any pronouns, most comfortable with she/they)

Current time: 4:05 PM

Favorite musical artists: David Bowie, Iggy Pop, Kurt Cobain, Courtney Love, Johnny Cash, Nick Cave, PJ Harvey, Leonard Cohen, Kathleen Hanna, Placebo, Elton John

Stuck in my head: Never Let Me Down Again- Depeche Mode

Last movie I saw: Last Days- Gus Van Sant

Last thing I googled: Ben Folds lyrics I’m so sorry

other blogs: ok @iknewishouldcreateasensation and @everyonesintothisscene are my two velvet goldmine blogs, but I’ve been putting a lot of shit on @untieformeyourhighbluegown like aes/vent stuff, all my original art, and all my music. it’s like a museum of me

do I get asks: The asks I get fall into three categories

1- why are you such a lesbian hater for being mean to x terf

2- why do you like David Bowie

3- you’re sexy

4- something pj Harvey related

5- one of my cool gay friends saying cool gay things to me and ya just generally vibing abt loving each other

6- random accusations and transphobia that I don’t understand

so yeah boys pls send asks!!!

reason for url: i lov Oscar Wilde and I love Velvet Goldmine

followers/following: I have like 500 followers MAYBE it might actually be 300 and I follow like 2,000 blogs

lucky number: 6

currently wearing:

Johnny Cash target t shirt

dream job: jack of all trades artist & touring musician

favorite foods: pastries, sugar, sharp cheese, any bread that isn’t soft, garlic, Mac n cheese, p-

instruments: vocals/guitar, but I want to learn piano again I think??

favorite song(rn): Whole Lotta Shakin’ Goin On(Jerry Lee Lewis), Levi Johnson’s Blues(Ben Folds and Nick Hornby), Clap Hands(Tom Waits), I Hope That I Dont Fall In Love With You(Tom Waits), Life And Death Of Mr. Badmouth(PJ Harvey), Ballad Of Hollis Brown(Bob Dylan), Don’t(Ed Sheeran)

i tag:

@wannabegothgurl @pawnshopbluez @wherearemyelephants @beatle-capaldi @lionslove @glamrock-lizardman @joestrummershowl @bigembarrassingheart @old-memoria

[detectivehole]

Go comic feral, i followed this blog for a rEASOn and it's bc i like to hear your random vents and rants and also you reblog cool stuff. But i digress, go comic feral i am hERE for it

fine

PETER PARKER BEING RICH IS STUPID  he didnt even ern what he has himself it was nt even himn he wasnt in his body maybe if i had got to see him start fron nothing to being a cool ceo or whatever id be able to stand it but nooooooo he just GOT is for nothing so it feels stupid like “ha ha what if like tony stark haha” its DUMB and i haven’t read a spider man comic for a long time

deadpool/spiderman crossover comic bad. feels out of character a lot. funny concept and full of funny jokes but as far as characterization its bad in my opinion- was made to capitalize off the hype of the ship and we all know it

don cates should be banned from writing comics bc he fucking sucks and ill never forgive him for what he did/tried to do to venom

deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good deadpool good dea

the venom movie was a lot of fun but it was very ooc a lot HOWEVER seeing some of the cut scenes and scripts you can see that it used to be actually fairly in character for the comics but a lot of scenes with eddie establishing himself as not actually the most nicest of guys (not that eddie isnt a nice guy deep down but he is a good amount fucked up with a big ol hero complex and a problem with ‘i can do no wrong” mentality sometimes) were cut and considering how the fandom for the movie treats him i can see why the cut those bits out bc i dont think movie goers would have liked him as much wich is a shame bc he is a good guy at the end of the day just fucked up

straight white male comic fans are the worst people in the world and breaking their fingers is a daydream i indulge in 

matt murdock is a himbo

foggy nelson is a good man who deserves better friends

i can tell what deadpool comics someone has read based on how they characterize wade in their fan works and i have a 80% success rate with it. the most common was the daniel way run but now its the spider-man/deadpool crossover series

soulda used miles for the mcu spidey instead of cannibalizing his story for parts like they did. dick move, Disney

mcu bad

i think just the idea of dc’s Red Tool is fucking hilarious but i dont like his character at all

batman and superman should fuck but they wont :/

matt and foggy should to but the comic industry is afraid of making long running characters lgbt bc theyre WEAK

deadpool need a canon bf they cant keep telling us hes pan and not showing us for reals- hell he could just go on one date or be shown having a one night stand or something- something beyond a damn joke

cable gay. no i will not listen to any other opinions.

im excited to read moon knight i have a book waiting i just have to finish my current one

SCUD the disposable assassin is the most underrated comic EVER and i LOVE IT however i think it ended stupid and bad however it went on fucking hiatus for like a decade and then was rapped up really fast so any ending is a godsend

i desperately want a long-form stand alone series abt wanda wilson bc shes the perfect foil for a good Feral Dumbass Woman comic. think abt it; shell sell immediately bc of recognizable brand, and then she can just go on violent stupid adventures without any of the other dp corps. it doenst have to line up with any canon i just want insane lady dp adventure comic. this is an unreasonable dream but mine none the less

i though that agent venom was stupid

tank girl is fucking amazing and i love it i never understand whats going on and i enjoy the confusion

reading early hulk comics feels like watching a weird, poorly produced old black and white sci-fi soap

there needs to be better, more easily accessed, official reading-order guides published and posted on the walls of comic shops everywhere

the 80s and 90s were the best time for marvel comics and no one can tell me otherwise. that was peak comic time

the worst time for comics was the 2000s and early 2010s

sometimes i am shocked by the art that gets the editors pass in comics. some of it is so bad and im not even talking about the disproportionate ladies

the lego marvel and dc movies are way better than the live action movies and im not even being sarcastic

seriously the 2000s made some horrible comics

i feel like committing acts of mass violence every time someone says comics arnt real reading/stories/implies theyre worth less of any value than a novel

i read the first deadpool comic i got so much that the art itself is so ingrained in my mind that people have shown my just the corners of panels and ive identified them correctly

i distinctly remember the first time the woman at the book store stopped asking me for parental permission to buy the comics i was getting (12yos) because i went there so often that she just remembered who i was and that the adult would say its fine

i refuse to talk about comics with people at cons because i am gatekept or flirted with every single time no matter what and there is no in between. and yea its because i have tits. youd think that eventually theyd learn but gross comic men never do and all the others have adopted the same policy as me so the closest i come to positive comic interaction at cons is standing in the same vicinity as another chick, looking at the same section, and the kinda smiling at each other

i think the avengers are boring. really really boring. the x-men are way better

i related to gwenpool too much when she first started and it scared/offended me so i stopped reading for a while until her character developed more and we stooped being so similar

i have spider-man bedding. i picked it out only a few months ago. its good it makes me feel cool in a very uncool way

watching spider-man as a kid made me wanna be a scientist. watching batman as a kid made me want to do martial arts. i ended up failing chemistry and falling on my face a lot instead.

i had a huge venom toy and a huge spiderman toy as a kid and while i did make them fight a lot i also made them hug just as much. i wanted them to be friends

on that note PETER IS MEAN TO THE SYMBIOTE NOW AND HE DONT EVEN HAVE A REASON NO MORE hes just such a dick about criminal reform eddie and the symbiote aint special with this- he says he believes people can be better but he really doesnt show it. he tends to think people are set in their ways and while this makes sense forthe most part considering how much hewas bullied as a kid/adult (that also contributes to his mild “i protect my own” mentality  tho at least he consciously fights that one) it stil pisses me off

i can think way more but i need to sleep i think

[dr-gloom]

Kintsukuroi

A continuation of Fall Apart, loooong overdue! Thank you everyone for being patient with me while I worked up the focus and motivation to write this. I hope you like it as much as I! <3

Fandom: Sander’s Sides

Pairing: none

Words: 1,207

Summary: Virgil is trying to recover from his soul-shattering breakup with Roman, reminded that the world won’t stop for his depression. He learns to pick himself back up and gains a nugget of wisdom from an unlikely source. 

Tags/Warnings: depression, Human AU, recovery, basically vent-fic-part-2

A/N: so yeah, just like Fall Apart, this is based heavily on real life. The only real difference is that I never met a Patton. 

Read it on AO3

fic masterlist

like what I do? buy me a coffee or GoFundMe

@hungry-red-panda @neonb-fly @chemically-imbalanced-romance @unbefuckinglieveable @punsterterry

To say that things got better would be a complete fucking lie.

In the remainder of his shitty summer vacation, Virgil only really left his bed to use the bathroom or eat when the hunger became unbearable. He slept a majority of the time, turning his back on the sunlight shining through his blinds in a mocking reminder that just because his world was falling apart, that didn’t mean the real world was. He was numb. And when he wasn’t numb he was heartbroken, or angry. He had no one to talk to about it because Logan wasn’t the most empathetic person out there and Roman still had him blocked.

Roman.

Virgil couldn’t stop asking himself what he’d done wrong. How had he screwed this up? He thought they were doing great, he thought Roman loved him. What was he talking about in that last message?

He wished he could just ask.

When he felt up to it, he brought up Tumblr on his phone to scroll through it and distract his mind. That became rather hard when half the posts were about people venting their problems and talking about how depressed they were, though. He remembered back when he was new to Tumblr and had just followed all of these blogs, how happy and dumb and funny everyone was. Now they all just logged on to use Tumblr as a personal diary.

He deleted his blog the next day.

Eventually he has to force himself out of bed to go to his fall classes. No matter how low he’s feeling or how much he hates himself he’s always been a good student, and it wouldn’t stop just because he was alonealonealone a little depressed. His classes gave him plenty to focus on to distract himself, making his mind numb, empty of free thought and only capable of answering homework questions or performing basic tasks like showering and eating.

Logan still messaged him at least once a week to ask how he was doing, if he wanted to hang out, or just to make sure Virgil was still alive. Virgil hardly ever responded, and when he did it was short one- or two-word answers. He didn’t want to talk to Logan. He didn’t want to talk about what happened and how he was doing and how his thoughts were cognitive distortions. He knew Logan meant well, but he just… He didn’t think he could deal with that right now, so he was all but avoiding the other, claiming to be swamped with school.

It wasn’t a total lie; this was his last semester before fieldwork, so he’d needed to shove as many classes into these sixteen weeks as possible. Eighteen units, the absolute max they would allow, and even though that usually meant homework all day every day, he still found himself with some free time. God, he was so bored.

So he made a new Tumblr.

He felt bad abandoning the friends he’d made on his old Tumblr, but he wasn’t interested in the same things anymore and they were all so depressed and…. He just. Didn’t need that.

He spent an obsessively-long time trying to think of a new URL. For some reason, he found himself cycling through the nicknames Roman had given him over the months.

doom-and-gloom? Nope, taken.

dark-stormy-knight? Nah. Damn.

surley-temple? Taken.

jack-smellington? Taken.

Taken.

Taken.

Taken.

Taken.

God dammit.

Virgil groaned, rubbing his forehead tiredly. Without thinking too much of it - it was probably taken - he types in ‘dr-gloom’.

Not taken.

He grins for the first time in weeks as he finishes going through the mandatory bullshit to set up his blog and find people to follow. Sure, he looks up some of the people he used to follow and follows them on this new blog, but he doesn’t tell them who he is.

This is a new beginning, after all.

He’s already decided that this blog will be more positive. He’ll be the positivity he wanted when he was hurting. It’s… out of character for him, but that doesn’t mean it can’t become a part of him. By being others’ positivity, he can be his own too.

As he finds more people to follow and his dash is filled with posts, something inside him - a gut instinct he’s learned not to ignore - tells him to message people. Not everyone; specific URLs stick out to him and he can’t help but feel like maybe the universe is telling him who needs his help. It’s stupid, and maybe a little egotistical, but after he sends the messages he feels…. Good. He sends good morning and good night messages to ten strangers-turned-family every day, regardless of how he feels inside, and little by little he finds that he’s not as depressed as he used to be. His daily ritual actually picks up his mood as he reads the responses from people and talks to them through PMs.

He does this for nearly two months before someone randomly messages him one day. The URL reads ‘pattoncakes94’, the icon most likely a selfie of possibly the cutest, bubbliest person Virgil has ever seen.

pattoncakes94 hey! just wanted to come say hi! i love those messages you send to people, it’s a great idea!

He takes entirely too long trying to come up with something to say that doesn’t sound too cheery, hyper, or creepy.

dr-gloom uh thanks

He face-palms. He sounds like a jackass!

pattoncakes94 oh! sorry, i should probably introduce myself, huh? im patton (he/him/his)! im 24, i looooove cats and puns and cookies and sweaters, and im a taurus!

Virgil snorts. Oh my god, this guy’s a dork.

dr-gloom thats cool uh im virgil 20 he/him/his i like music, nightmare before christmas, and deathnote and im a leo i think i dont really do the astrology thing

pattoncakes94 oh, thats okay! its just kinda fun, i dont actually believe in those daily astrology things what kinda music do you like?

The next few hours go like this, with the two men chatting about anything and everything. Virgil didn’t even know how two people could talk this long without the conversation feeling strained or boring. He hated small talk, but for some reason he found himself enjoying talking to Patton. The conversation flows seamlessly, Patton filling any possible pauses or lulls with his own little anecdotes or questions.

Over the next few weeks, whenever he’s in a bad mind space Virgil messages Patton. Patton never asks what’s bothering him or pressures him into opening up. Instead, he willingly provides a distraction and chats with Virgil until he’s laughing in the comfort of his room, heart light and mind clear. His favorite conversations were the ones that were the most random, but led to Virgil learning something new.

pattoncakes94 hey, you ever heard of kintsugi? also known as kintsukuroi

dr-gloom no…? what is it

pattoncakes94 it’s this japanese thing, it’s so cool! basically they take broken pottery and fix it with gold, silver, or platinum instead of throwing it out!

dr-gloom why? sounds like a waste of time

pattoncakes94 because they saw the beauty in those flaws in the cracks and breaks because just like people, it’s the blemishes that make them beautiful

[meyhew]

It's not "antis" mad about the flags, it's every fan that isn't a Larrie, because rainbow flags are not supposed to be about a ship. Harry's ring is not an anniversary ring, half the girls I know have similar rings. Hell, Kendall has the same exact ring right now. "Harry tying the knot" I sometimes wonder if you read back the ridiculous things you say. Louis has been "MIA" for 90% of this year. Larries make up shady receipts ALL THE FUCKING TIME and then they repeat it even when they're (1)

debunked, like “the rose has been taken care of” which the tattoo artist was super pissed off about, saying that 1. he’d never said that. 2. he’d never talk about his experience with a celebrity client to a random person. There were fans in the boxes right next to the box that had just one person. There’s no way Louis could be there without one of the two dozen people in the boxes next to it noticing, unless they were all blind. Sometimes I wonder if you read back the things you say 2.0 (2)

Harry’s crew members were posting and liking pictures of rainbow flags. There’s no way his sound guy is aware of a tweet Louis posted in 2011. Do you think Harry would hold a briefing meeting about all things Larry with the 200 people in his crew? I just… sometimes your claims are so absurd that I can’t help believing you’re either tremendously stupid or doing it on purpose. Harry has ACTUALLY messed up what song he’s singing next before. The last time was during one of the last OTRA (3)

shows and Louis had to correct him. What would him singing two seconds of IICF before its time even mean? You’re all so weird. Harry says he appreciates all the flags at EVERY SINGLE CONCERT. He didn’t emphasize “all” the flags like you’re doing. He just said “thank you for all your flags” it’s like saying “thank you for all your love and support” you’re the weirdo emphasizing a word he didn’t emphasize in a phrase he says every night to make a point he wasn’t making (4)

Lastly, I will say, though, that I’m glad this is what Larry’s been reduced to. Harry doesn’t give you an inch, so you have to make up the most ridiculous reaches to get validation on your ship. I can’t wait for Harry to get a boyfriend and for Freddie to start going to pre-school and everybody calling him Freddie Tomlinson there and him calling Louis dad in public, to see you scramble. You’re probably still going to be conspiracy theorists, though. Because you’ve all lost it. Bye. (5)

honestly the only reason i’m answering this goddamn ESSAY is so i can vent lmao. how is it that y’all always find our posts? do u keep tabs on our blogs? with every passing day, there’s more truth to brenda’s statement that antis are just larrie stans. smh. anyway lets pick apart the literal five paragraph essay you took the time to type and send to a blog that doesn’t give 2 shits about ur opinion. 

flags - talked about in a lot of fucking detail but in case you missed it, which you clearly did, read up on them here. it’s deeper than a ship and educating urself would go you some good.

harry’s rings have always meant something so there’s that. believe what you will, no one is forcing anything on you. 

harry tying the knot, louis being mia, shady receipts: bitch you think we take everything as a fact? we know things are shady, we know people like all time, we weren’t born yesterday. there’s louis being mia and then there’s louis conveniently popping up to make sure he isnt where harry is. same old patterns for years. 

louis being in the vip boxes - read this. or dont. i dont care either way 

harry’s crew members not knowing the tweet - that’s rich, because the night of the rio concert, i had people telling me there is no way people dont know what that tweet means. i had antis telling me everyone knows that tweet is from louis to harry and everyone knows the meaning it holds. so what is the truth? figure it out 

i was referring to harry’s solo concerts but go off i guess. 

i’m not going to talk to a brick wall about his thank yous lmao yall keep saying shit without reading what’s been said before 

i ALSO cant wait for freddie to start school so i can see how little louis is involved in his kid’s life. 

i’ll be honest, when yall send asks like these unprompted, i can’t tell if you’re trying to convince me or yourself. instead of spending your time on larrie blogs, maybe go and do something else  

[mrfreezebug]

Idk I’ve mentioned a few shitty exes in passing before. But I never go into detail. And idk man due to recent events I’m just gonna vent a little bit about a piece of emmett dating history. CW: Bad bad bad relationship things  tl;dr tl;dr tl;dr  s orry if you’re on mobile 

So like YEARS AGO I got technically broken up with 3 times over a three month period which resulted in me being stoned out of my mind for three weeks straight and shit faced when i wasn’t up all up there. I just felt horrible. And through all that... I managed to meet someone who seemed super chill, fun, and nice and junk. And while we were casually seeing each other I got to meet new people and swing with them a lil. It was super therapeutic and they seemed so open minded and like they knew themselves so well... and I was still so lonely that I thought even though I didn’t have feelings yet I admired the FUCK out of them in the moment and thought i could grow to really like them?? We talked about it a lot and they sounded super understanding. Even though they constantly asked if I was ready they kept telling me they wanted "easy” as much as I did... But once I let go of my apprehensions of getting with them officially...  It turned out to be a big mistake. SO shit happened and once we became official the person who I was seeing before who ghosted suddenly messaged me bein all “sorry babe” and I was all: “I gotta tell u something” And so I told them I was seeing someone else on accounta how they just ditched me for a month with no response. And they asked me who And I told them And they told me to get the fuck out that they were a trash person. They also guilted me for moving on. “I leave for a week and you’re already on to someone else??” like R U K I D D I N G M E and I thought they were just being a salty jealous piece of bitch so I told them to chill. But they wanted closure and I’m nice so I said ok to meeting up in person. But the person I was seeing currently said they feared for my safety and that I’d cheat on them with that person. (Needless 2say they did not like eachother) And I was just??? “I wouldn’t cheat and what sorta safety concerns r there” And they were all “they’ll rape you or something and I don’t want to date someone who puts themself in the position to be raped” That was a pretty big red flag lmfao.

I should have just told both them to fuck off then but Ive never learned to really just leave anyone like that before. Im way better at it now but before I didn’t want to break ties with the only person who seemed to want to be around me and make me happy at that moment... so I just ignored that gross comment and I just told the other person we couldn’t meet.

But sure enough that weird kinda controlling situation turned into 8months of a hellish relationship where they were just SCREAMING at me for EVERYTHING. Like they literally screamed all the time. There were more times I was being yelled at than not??? Other people often told them to even calm the fuck down in public. It was wild. The screaming bullshit got to the point where THEIR friends came to me to see if I was okay. They’d literally sit me down and ask me if they physically harmed me. Which, they didn’t but there were threats surrounding every time I forgot something or messed something up. Nothing like serious but, honestly? Who for real who says “it makes me want to smack you when you can’t remember basic things.” Thinking back to this rn is so shocking to me. Idk man.

A few times they would get way too into my face and I’d have to physically shove them away because it was too intense. Just yelling. Right in my face. I can’t even remember why they were yelling. They were just always over reacting over something small I did. It all blurred together at some point. I just know I was always either zoned the fuck out or crying.  They also would often brag about being able to make people cry also. Like “I can make anyone cry. I know what to say to I get to people the most.” And it’s fucking gross, as well as a common thing I’d run into with other friends n shit. Idk why controlling people always end up with my wimpy ass. BuT ANYWAY I also couldn’t use my computer, go to conventions, or see friends without dealing with their controlling ass. So that was also a bag of shit. My life was fucking MISERABLE Talking to them only got me so far. Like five minutes of potential mutual clarity in any situation before they’d go on a rant about their problems and it’d basically end with me saying sorry with no progress. And I was still so soft spoken then when I tried twice to break up w/them it failed. It makes me want to go back and SHAKE MYSELF like why did I put myself through that for THAT MANY MONTHS???  Another kicker: similar to my experiences with other partners I was coerced into sexual situations probably every other week tops?? By threatening to break up with me, or tell me that I suck as a partner, telling me I make them feel ugly, etc… shits fucking weird like here I was crying like 9/10 times they guilted me for not wanting sex, my face is fucking UGLY and they still wanted it?? SHIT MAN. I cried during sex a lot. It fucks with me to this day. My initial instinct is to be too afraid to say no to sex.

But they actually ended up breaking up with me bc I went to go hang out with a friend and not tell them. It was probably more of a threat to try to control me but I saw that opening and booked it so far away, man I went to Denny’s that night for the first time without worrying about upsetting them for not answering their texts right away. I actually felt BAD that I didn’t care tho?? It was dumb but this thing is still a bit of a problem for me. Even if logically they deserve to feel bad, I feel horrible for hurting anyones feelings. They seemed WAY torn up about the break up. I made some empty promises like an idiot. Telling them I’d see how I felt if they worked on their anger issues and shit. It was so fucked up when I was alone with them I felt so bad for them. I felt like I really hurt them or that I owed them something for the times they were nice to me and paid for my shit and whatnot. I also have trouble staying mad. I always just forgive and wanna move on. So we’d actually meet up with peeps at gay events n what not, I was friends with their friends at this point and I didn’t want to rock the boat with anyone even when they tried getting me back at the most random times. But I’m hella distant from people in general. It gets me into trouble with people I genuinely used to like let alone with people who stress me out lmao So they’d send me paragraphs of friendship break ups and delete me from everything then message me and try to readd me again and then get upset again that I don’t “check in on them” how “I don’t care about anyone but myself” and just all around stress me the fuck out. I just have a hard time checking in on people bc of various reasons. I’m working on my self confidence for it. And I don’t want to make people stay if that bothers them. So I just kinda let them come and go but the constant confrontation is STRESSFUL. It makes it harder to check in on anyone who pulls that shit tbh.

And NOW they’re trying to do it again after a few years and like I feel BAD again and like I should be over everything tbh it was YEARS AGO BUT I REALLY DONT WANT TO CARE ANYMORE.  IM KINDA PATHETIC T H E   E N D

[monsterloveday]

Single life - the good and the bad.

The good and bad sides to single life. It absolutely has both, as does everything in life. There seems to be some kind of war between singles and coupled folk, as if they are trying to get one up on each other, to prove that their life is considerably ‘better’ than their opponents.

This bothers me. It bothers me because life isn't that rigid or consistent, life moves, and so do all of our situations. There is also the need to consider that people are so different, you know the saying, “one mans treasure” and all that. For some, my single life is their idea of a worst knight mare, simile, a nuclear family at the age of 25 would be mine.

Its nothing personal I guess, I think its just taken that way when people try and force their way of life on you, or assume you are miserable because you haven't got what they have, this goes without saying the people that straight up judge you for whatever your life circumstance - they can do one (and my oh my, there are many of them!). There are definitely times for me where being single is actually epic and others where it actually sucks balls.

I will share them with you. Bad points... Lack of touch. This one is strange for me, because I haven't been touched for so long, that Ive grown used to it, yet I still crave it from time to time (usually in the winter). BUT if I ever do get touched or if someone tried to hug me or something, it weirds me out now, that I find it unnecessary because I have gone so long without it!. Its definitely made me less affectionate and less expectant to receive affection. That part of me has kind of died.  I think I have associated touch / affection to do with only a partner - which is bad. (lets just say I am no longer a ‘hugger’) 

You also become very observant. All the “Netflix and chills” / “lets cuddle up on the sofa”, comments you so often see on social media or hear among all your coupled up friends and family members (yes I am pretty much the only single one left out of friends and family - which I will mention later on as its an issue in itself!) are a little punch in the heart. You kind of become a little bit bitter that some people have that certain someone that they can come and hug after a really shit day - and how some really take that for granted. Little things are so huge and not many people get that. I think that the people that have had a real good amount of time of being single understand this. Love is not something you are owed, but for some it just falls in their laps and they have never had to live life coping on their own. (You definitely get annoyed at people who take love for granted and people who cheat etc!) But - being deprived of something makes you learn to live without it - its a educational, saddening yet strengthening double edged sword. I cant even remember what snuggling up to a man feels like and they say that touch is actually something that humans need and that it releases the ‘feel good’ hormone - perhaps lack of touch does really do things to humans?. I believe so. Feeling Safe. Now, I think in my whole relationship / dating life, only one man made me feel safe and it was wonderful. Im not saying that women can not feel safe without a man - absolutely not. But there is something so damn sexy and reassuring when you can actually feel a mans strength (in his body and mind) and you know he has your back. When you walk down the street, you know there will be no shit from no one, as you are with him. That when you're in his arms - you feel completely and utterly safe, it makes you feel so feminine. Nothing can get you, and you breathe a sigh of relief, thats all is well, because you are there, with him.  I miss that, even if just for a minute I could have that again. All of your family and friends are pretty much hooked up. Gone are the days of going out and flirting with a group of guys, because all of your mates are at home with their others half's sucking dick or fanny. This also adds to the struggles of trying to ‘get out there’ as you’d be on the prowl alone - not attractive. When all your mates hook up, it kills your social life too, I miss the nights of going out dressed up all girly, dancing the night away and flirting / kissing with drunken guys.

There is no one to talk to when you have those ‘Im feeling crappy about being single’ moments because no one gets it because no one is in your situation. You will also never get a break from being surrounded by couples, family gatherings = couples everywhere, meeting with friends = couples everywhere. You have to become accustomed to always being the third, forth and fifth wheel when with family and friends. There was once a New Years Eve party where at midnight, everyone was obviously eating face and there I was - twat face, the only single person sat there hating my existence and wallowing in self pitty. (Holidays are the WORST for being single) This is not to say I dont love my friends and family but sometimes you just wish you had some single pals to break away from the constant reminders or someone to really open up to and that they understand, its tiring to always put on this brave face when really you just want to say you feel like shit. Theres also the chance coupled friends will get offended if you need to vent about always being the single one - its not personal, sometimes we just need to express ourselves. Sometimes you just wonder if you are destined to live life solo Perhaps it isn't happening because its not supposed to?, that you are actually happier alone?. Its happened to everyone else so easily so there must be a reason its not happening to you?. To you, its like climbing mount everest, yet to most, its as easy as 1,2,3!. That in the time you have been single, others have gone through about 3 relationships that have started, ended and then they have found ‘the one’ and got married, yet you cant even find A date?. Am I an alien? I must be doing everything wrong?. The longer it goes on for the more convinced you become that it will never happen and you kind of begrudgingly, make peace with it and stop trying and just live your own life. Confidence Sometimes, only sometimes you wonder what is wrong with you and that you are just not fanciable / fuckable / loveable. Those thoughts can fuck off - Im fucking awesome. You get so good at being single that you think you'd be crap at relationships The thought of having to share a bed with someone makes you want to die. What if they snore?. What If Im ill and I just need to do smelly farts all night and toss and turn without worrying that Im going to keep someone awake? What if I want a wank and I cant because THEY are there?! Omg would that mean we would have to arrange shower times in the morning?, Im not fucking sharing a shower with him! Oh man imagine someone constantly texting you even though you see them all the ruddy time? - just fuck off!. And having to see someone all the time?! Someone demanding my time from me? oh god I cant deal!. Gone would be the days of just going where ever I want without explaining myself to anyone! - Ive got too used to only thinking of me, Im too selfish to change that now! and whats more - ID HAVE TO FUCKING SHAVE AND GET MY BODY OUT. Man I’d be so shit at sex =\ and Id have to tell them I love them!. So. Many. Vulnerable. Feelings. Stay. Up. Walls!. Finance All those people who share bills, rent etc. Not everyone would have had an opportunity to move out if they didn't have their significant other, especially in this day and age of expense!. I can also say as a single person it is ruddy annoying having to cash out on everyone else's other half's / kids etc. Whereas presents for you are ‘from both of us’. My single life benefits everyone else's pockets when it comes to christmas! GAH!.  I get SO JEALOUS when I hear someone say that their other half is picking them up from work or cooking for them that night, I WISH I had that!. Fuck buses, walking the dog then having to cook for myself - food NEVER comes for single people, just try getting a bag of spinach for one! so much waste!. Good Points... My Flange is probably really tight  Its so out of use its like its brand new. I dont have to shave for anyone and it is marvellous.  I dont have to get my body out to worry what someone else thinks of it, nor do I have to worry if Im up the duff (although I use precautions, that worry is ALWAYS there, wondering, freaking the hell out, wondering when my period will ever come etc). Its a worry that is brilliant to not have to think about - nor do I have to think about the ruddy pill (no thanks!). Also - self service! =P Your independence and strength will sky rocket You really dont understand how some people freak out when they have to do things alone. For you, doing things alone is such an adventure / enjoyable experience. Yes I go out to dinner, the cinema, weekend breaks alone and its not weird my dears. I love how I can plan anything at anytime. Your strength builds up and up when your doing everything for yourself and it is really liberating and you realise that people that also have this quality are very rare. It makes you very strong and independent and independent people are sexy. =p You are as free as a bird - go fly!. I do what I want and I can order pizza at 3am and eat it in bed if I wish. (what a plan!). I could go travel for months on end if I wanted, I could move to a completely new place and chat up randomers if I so wished too and answer to no one. I could shave all my hair off and pork a load of girls just for fun. Learn a new instrument / get a hobby / go to evenings classes etc - because you CAN. I hear friends who have kids say how they would love to do the smallest of things like have a night to themselves, to go to the cinema or just go shopping, and I realise that I too, take small things for granted and I need to embrace my single life more.  What I do is completely my choice and my choice alone - no hold backs. It feels so good. Finance Yes there is a factor of finance on this side of the spectrum! Your money is YOURS. Go spend a butt load on a new jacket if you want. Go spend £70 on a hair cut if you want. Whats more, you save money on not having to buy hair removal stuff! No birthday or christmas presents on your other half - or dates, or nothing! Save up that spare cash and do something worth while - like get tattoos all over your body ;P - priorities darling, that is YOU! =P. You have control of your own wellbeing One of the biggest issues for me when in relationships / seeing someone was how their actions / treatment towards me effected my wellbeing. I hated that they had so much power to hurt me because my feelings for them were so deep. I hated being so vulnerable and how my happiness was so reliant on how they chose to treat me. With single life problems, they are mostly what you have brought upon yourself, and sorting your own shit out makes you stronger and not dealing with someone else's bullcrap is a breath of fresh air =) So, these are some of my good and bad points, I really could have gone on for forever!. My unshaven flange enjoys parts, and doesn't with other parts. I want to say that its completely human to have weak times about things - like wanting to be hugged sometimes does not make you needy! (I hate that theres so much name calling for humans wanting to be humans!) Whats your favourite thing and hate about your relationship status? Be back soon. Jay Monster.