#what do you mean 22 year olds shouldnt still have obsessions with a book they read when they were 8??

[mrsroryhuntzberger]

hi im back on my borderline unhealthy love of a book from my elementary school days

if yall dont know i love cryptid hunters by roland smith and like i always do about twice a year I was thinking about it the other day. the hard thing about reflecting on books from childhood is how much fucked up shit happened that is not properly addressed. so under the cut is my rant/things i would change if someone ever gives me my dream job of turning my favorite books into tv shows (@ CW i’m looking at you i may hate riverdale but this would probably work in a similar fashion i was the co-authored of a great thread on twitter about turning cyberchase into a riverdale like show so you know i got skills)

the plot is basically teens sent to live with uncle they didnt know existed who is searching for dinos and theres a bad old white guy who hates people and animals and also mystery

1. how tf does grace have a passport?? i know wolfe’s friend was in the US gov and wolfe also did work for the government so does that mean grace has a bunch of false documents??? what happens when she applied for colleges?? does she have a social security number??

2. did we ever find out what wolfe did that made the us government agree to give him a fucking island??? (idk if roland smith mentioned it in the 4th book, i read it once and havent read it again bc its my least fav and i didnt like the hitler stuff)

3. no hitler. if i remake this into a tv series theres no hitler connection. blackwood is just gonna suck on his own and we wont have any clones or hitler. i want roses mother to be some random chick blackwood knocked up (if we are going dark its an intern or young employee) and then paid off to keep the baby and then probably had killed because hes evil. 

4. rose is an abuse victim. this is one of the more serious changes i’d make because in my head i have a whole four season tv show plan where season 3 focuses on grace at noahs ark and we also get flashbacks to when rose was alive and there. in my tv show/headcanon blackwood is hella emotionally abusive, rose could leave but he gaslights her and guilts her and is awful and basically makes it so while she could leave she can’t really leave. rose meets wolfe, they form a bond, and he helps her get out, then they run away and eventually go to the congo (#honeymoon). this abuse is echoed with grace and blackwood but grace wasnt ya know raised by him so it has a different effect. the abuse is one of the main reasons why rose doesnt want grace to ever be with blackwood because he is awful. 

5. Blackwood is the worse that needs to be highlighted but also hes not a cartoon villain. he also has a power complex thats why he has a whole display of taxidormy animals and thats why he wants all the rare animals to be his cause he wants power over others thats also part of his abuse

6. grace is very conflicted throughout all of this because she found out her parents arent her parents, her mom is dead, her thought to be parents are still missing throughout all of this!! and her grandpa is a fucked up madman who wants her dad dead and she also has preexisting anxiety. i would want to showcase her inner turmoil and this idea of her being unsure of who she is in the later books/seasons and this plays with her relationship with blackwood, not that shes on his side or anything, but maybe how manipulative he is and how desperate she is to learn about this whole other side of her apparent family. grace didnt get enough attention in the later books. also doesnt she straight up think marty and luther are dead at one point in book 3? girl is not walking away from all of this trauma free she doesnt need to have a breakdown but shes confused and should be allowed to be confused

7. reluctant dino parent grace I SAID WHAT I SAID i just have this humorous headcanon that grace has always been a bit afraid of dinos (repressed from ya know the dino that killed her mom) (also she couldnt watch juarassic park as a kid and mentions that whenever someone references it because no one is gonna be dealing with dinos and not quoting jurassic park)but she and the dinos bond at noahs ark and she ends up in a comedy relief bit where she has to feed them and gets annoyed at them in season/book 4. this may or may not be inspired by me and my dog

8. yeah marty and luther have a thing lets be real here

9. more laurel 

10. im sure i have more but i have class tomorrow and ive already spent too much time on this thanks for reading (and im sorry)!!!

[serene-serein]

Save Yourself, Don’t Watch Death Note

I documented my thoughts while watching the new Death Note movie so...here you go.

1. Music is nice 2. Tf is this opening scene 3. ....the quiz ?????? 4. edgy hair and all 5. Typical misunderstood girl 6. THE CIG?????? 7. what's with the dramatic wind???? did no one else see the book?? (1:37:26) 8. random hard rain???? 9. Bullies wtf 10. the girl 11. light WTF (1:36:34) 12. he sounds like an 8 year old 13. he acts like an 8 year old 14. Mia lied cuz she a ho 15. Light shut up UR SO EDGY!!! (1:35:21) 16. HIS MOM??? SHOULDNT BE DEAD?? 17. okay principal is a dick but tbh it's an edgy movie what did I expect 18. he still likes her why 19. detention?????? 20. he looks so gross 21. HE ACTS GROSS WTH (1:34:12) 22. the book looks gross 23. EW CREEPY TONGUE LICK 24. why r u reading it out loud 25. the book has been used?? why?? what?? 26. also there should be lines 27. RYUK??? BBY?????? he didn't try to scare him  in reality unmmmm what 28. "Hello?" @ monster (1:32:55) 29. RYUK LOOKS COOL DUDE 30. screaming omg I'm dead kill me 31. THE SCREAMING (1:32:14) 32. u fuckin child 33. APPLE! 34. cool voice 35. more screaming 36. AND THEN HES FINE????????? 37. "I'm asleep" stereotype 38. I love Ryuk babe 39. but what'd they do to him 40. LIGHT'S FACEEEEE IM DED (1:30:47) 41. bullies aren't like that um 42. so now Ryuk is the bad guy? 43. "I don't have a pen" 44. why does Ryuk have a pen 45. WHY IS LIGHT LISTENING 46. um wtf 47. DECAPITATION??????? 48. "Watch" IM 49. HIS FACE (1:29:02) 50. decapitated by a ladder 51. GORE IS OFF THE CHARTS 52. and then Ryuk is like "k now here lemme accept it" 53. WHAT (1:28:15) 54. apparently his dad is a drunk and they live in a trailer 55.  Light is apathetic towards the bully dying and so is the dad 56. "death of someone? meh. cheating? OH DEAR GAWD" 57. edgy kid and so disrespectful (1:26:53) 58. ......what is this family ??? 59. Light is so disrespectful and the dad doesn't even care 60. edgy music 61. A P P L E 62. what, u gonna kill ur daddy? 63. "Don't trust Rie-uk" NOT HOW U SAY IT 64. monster in the closet ;) (1:25:06) 65. let's play with the creature in the closet! 66. human hand 67. fast eating 68. screaming again 69. "Ree-you-k" a so much better 70. casually talking (1:24:13) 71. what is this... 72. "UR FINGERS R HUGE" WHAAAAT [funny line tho cuz that’d be me] 73. "No shark attacks while someone's on the toilet" admittedly funny 74. they act as if this is a casual occurrence 75. IGNORES RULES AND WARNINGS AND DECIDES TO KILL OKAY YEAH SURE (1:22:45) 76. "Gotta get mummy's killer" oh give me a break 77. Of course he's gorging himself 78. *from earlier* light didn't care about the bully dying for more than two seconds 79. that's..such an improbable way to die (1:21:10) 80. bad hiding 81. Light is so bad at hiding 82. "Ur ma was a hippie" oh okay that explains his name 83. UM LIGHT WTF UR SO BAD AT ACTING 84. EVERYONE IS BAD AT ACTING KMS 85. fuckin Ryuk 86. I like his face tho is cool (1:19:43) 87. openly uses book in school 88. "Kenny was a sociopath... i wish id seen it" 89. Mia is a bitch 90. they're awkward 91. she's so weird 92. BAD ACTING ABOUT IT 93. "Can't tell you" "k bye" "U WANNA KNOW?" (1:17:54) 94. she doesn't see Ryuk 95. "Ur poetry sucks" funny 96. HIS FUCKING FACE WHEN SHE SEEs IT 97. "I have a death god" and she S M I L E S and then just stays cuz it's so normal 98. "Lemme kill someone to prove to you" (1:16:27) 99. same school thing okay that's fine 100. why wouldn't the police just shoot him 101. Hit by a truck and that's not how it....I'm..what 102. "I killed him" BITCH RUN 103. he's a sociopath. simple 104. she doesn't care (1:14:55) 105. okay so he has an easy excuse. mommy issues 106. "Think I'm crazy?" "No, not crazy enough. we could change the world" 107. sneaking into the house together what 108. why am I spending time watching this 109. STOP KISSING PLS 110. "YOU’RE NOT SUPPOSED TO ASK" Oh okay so no consent? sure fine totally (1:13:40) 111. and they have sex okay sure 112. HIS FACE IS WHAT 113. creepy relationship 114. kissing while killing 115. Asian guy killed 116. laughing at it 117. THEY made up the name? oh hell no (1:12:08) 118. OH MY GOD "killer in Japanese so they'll look on the wrong continent" 119. laughing at it all 120. riots for him????? I can't even tbh 121. Kira is suddenly a good guy for everyone okay sure whatever u ass 122. HEY IS IT L HEY HEY 123. "Tokyo nightclub" YOU ASSES (1:10:00) 124. hey it's my boy L yo 125. he looks stupid snooping around the scene 126. bad acting 127. L is cool ig 128. I'm so confused what is this 129. very very bad acting 130. ....THE SINGING!!!!! 131. and somehow L falls asleep to it (1:07:48) 132. obvious green screen 133. Light is so obvious 134. "Is there a complaint department if I don't like one of Kira's choices" I like the dad he's funny 135. dad ig looks similar in a whitewashed way 136. all the papers on the ground and "eat shit" cuz that's normal 137. the screen wasn't even in a phone call okay 138. Watari never showed his face (1:04:57) 139. why is his dad so rude 140. no voice changer 141. he's so messy what 142. candy obsession 143. thanks for the true to anime sitting that's good 144. HOW DO YOU KNOW SEATTLE? 145. oh first kill? (1:03:49) 146. and now she's manipulative 147. "It's not like that" How do you know?? 148. not bad representation of L 149. you can't tell his age go away 150. ice cream pfft 151. "REST YOUR GLUTES" Funny 152. how did the police miss that (1:01:14) 153. why would you trust Light's dad then 154. speaking with Kira okay that's actually realistic 155. L never, and I mean NEVER, showed his face publicly 156. does light have nothing better to do 157. "He's a coward" Oh yeah do it 158. Ryuk I love you (59:17) 159. Ryuk laughing ily 160. okay so you got it light that sure okay fine 161. "THEN, James, ID BE DEAD" I love him 162. funny scene 163. why is Light sneaking downstairs You're so Obvious 164. SO OBVIOUS WTH 165. ...how is his dad so...oblivious 166. irony 167. ...more obviousness wth (56:53) 168. "A particularly bright kid" no he obviously isn't 169. stalker is obvious 170. and she's the manipulater okay 171. "Care-a" 172. SASSY LIGHT WOOT 173. she's a bitch 174. she's going to write in it isn't she 175. probably took it 176. she's a bitch okay (54:39) 177. *from earlier* why'd they change the if you touch the note thing 178. oh so the heart attack thing is back 179. agent franks is being controlled 180. L is shocked sureeeeeeeee not how he is tbh 181. what's this pop music I like it 182. inappropriate timing tho 183. and they walk off the building I'm screaming okay whatever 184. in Japan? what 185. screaming about the death note in school 186. OBVIOUSLY IT WAS HER 187. Ryuk is so sassy 188. okay so Ryuk’s killing them? Jesus that's not how it works 189. you can't kill a god of death idiot 190. what's with the name thing (51:37) 191. she's so demented 192. his dad already what is going on 193. she's insane and wanting to kill his dad.... 194. SHES TRYING TO GET HIM TO KILL HIS DAD?!?! 195. Mia what the actual fuck 196. L isn't bad 197. his dad is ready to die? (49:22) 198. is he going to kill his dad cuz I feel like he is 199. what's with L's old phone? 200. okay so he's figured out who Kira is 201. what's with the sleeping? 202. I love how Ryuk is in the book Light is reading 203. casual approaching 204. HIS SITTING L I like you 205. confronting him... 206. LIGHT IS SASSY 207. why is Ryuk like this I wonder (46:53) 208. cool lighting tho 209. giving himself away 210. face shown 211. why are they fighting 212. "I dont even carry a gun, it's distracting" best line 213. L is actually cool 214. light is fucking insane 215. no one notices the fighting 216. ew here SHE is again 217. push her into the mud she's ugly 218. "I'm a cheerleader. nothing mattered before you" best excuse 219. "I love you" I'm.. (44:16) 220. ew ew ew ew ew they're so gross 221. you need his full name um 222. not going to kill Watari 223. only 1 name able to be burned okay 224. creepy monk orphan 225. CREEPY MONK ORPHANAGE 226. why is Watari listening 227. Mia go away pls 228. L doesn't think this is weird with Watari? (41:18) 229. the tattoo is cool behind L’s ear but why is it there 230. I like L actually 231. he freaks out? unlike his character  232. top hat 233. casual L 234. so obvious um 235. girl isn't even gone and now they're talking 236. unlike L's character (39:21) 237. she's still there 238. Police brutality UMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM 239. CHOKE HOLD?! 240. THREATENING TO KILL L!!! 241. UM LIGHT WHAT THE FUCK 242. WHAT THE FUUUUUUUCK 243. AND HIS FUCKING FATHER???? (38:18) 244. pfft Ryuk 245. "Is there anything I need to know" he would 100% support Kira 246. L in the background 247. completely calm after this ???? 248. did they not look into the girl 249. why is Watari singing 250. Light is so obvious 251. THE TOPHATTT 252. Watari is probs going to die (35:41) 253. CREEPY ORPHANAGE 254. ghostly panting???????????? [subtitles] 255. Ryuk can't..I'm ...what 256. this is actually a cult tho 257. secret tunnel okay yes 258. what's with the weird music (34:12) 259. why is L so strung out 260. awkwardly morose 261. homecoming awkwardness 262. TOP HAT 263. middle fingers wouldn't be allowed 264. rat 265. I bet Watari is going to die. Light will probably be too late to/forget to burn the page 266. what happened to the monks? why did they leave the papers? plot hole 267. top hat 268. frosted tips like [ex’s name] 269. "Normal people scare me" the worst thing yet (31:32) 270. called it. Watari is dead 271. I don't get what the page 272. ohh to burn his name 273. she's fucking creepy and weird 274. and Light doesn't really care 275. top hat (29:21) 276. and then hugging 277. she's insane..... 278. "I saved you again" I'm screaming 279. ....what the actually hell is wrong with her. LIGHT FUCKING DUMP HER 280. I absolutely hate her 281. why is she able to write in it 282. ...and of course she killed him 283. she's insane, like actually completely insane (27:35) 284. What's with all the rules thing 285. I ACTUALLY HATE HER WHAT THE HELL 286. Ryuk wouldn't let this happen he isn't a bad guy 287. L is now even more insane and going to kill Light 288. inappropriate music 289. Light's ugly running (26:19) 290. why didn't he burn his own page 291. why didn't he put her in there towards the end so she couldn't see it 292. Plot holes 293. WRITE HER FING NAME (24:50) 294. did he leave the book 295. L is coming for you bitch also he can't drive so 296. inappropriate music and close ups 297. L is cool lol look @ his awesome running 298. ohhhh he's cool (23:22) 299. parkour 300. Light's running is like not pressing the correct buttons on a quick time 301. L's running is awesome 302. nice lighting tbh 303. KILL HIM KILL HIM (21:50) 304. "Lord Kira" kill me 305. is this supposed to be a romantic scene when she wrote his name in the book? 306. he's carrying a gun like literally what 307. he should kill her (20:30) 308. KILL HER KILL HER 309. inappropriate music 310. "Lets run away together" 311. she's insane and still smiling 312. he probs wrote her name (19:28) 313. probs pushes him out 314. oh look @ Ryuk 315. OH YESSSSSS HE KILLED HER OH YES 316. his reasoning 317. "You said you loved me I thought you wouldn't take it" you moron (18:17) 318. why would you take it back 319. did she already burn his page? 320. why is Ryuk involved 321. shouldn't they both die? they're both in it 322. THE MUSIC IS BACK WHAT 323. the book why would you catch it 324. THE MUSIC IS SO INAPPROPRIATE IM SCREAMING (16:51) 325. oh there they go! bye bye b 326. I love Ryuk's smile 327. the slowmo 328. everyone's faces 329. the flowers exploding 330. is Light alive???? 331. is she??? 332. I'm confused tbh (16:02) 333. she's dead 334. L is still alive yay! 335. free death note page 336. omfg it burned no 337. Light is alive probs 🙄 338. who took the random book? (14:45) 339. more killings 340. apparently everyone hates L?? that's not how he was treated 341. Who is this guy that picked up the book 342. why would you give back the book (13:42) 343. such an obvious place to leave it 344. the phone screen isn't on a call 345. is he going to wake up 346. yes 347. oh and he keeps the book you weirdo 348. she was insane why is he sorry 349. his dad is ugly and gross go away (12:10) 350. WAIT PLOT HOLE he was supposed to be in a coma but his dad knocked. his dad wouldn’t know he’s awake? 351. Dad somehow doesn't care it was Light 352. L what are you doing 353. is his dad going to join in... oh no 354. why would you need to write all this down idek man 355. what is L doing..oh nvm wait why did he act surprised by this (9:07) 356. so now L is thrown off course? oh going to write Light's name? 357. do it son, pls do it he's ugly 358. inappropriate music 359. Ryuk laughing (7:30)