#what do i do. i literally can't be honest with him can i. that'd be crazy.

[malscare]

told me he thinks im really hot & im his type in the same conversation he's complaining about a guy from work not texting back. what the fuck is happening

[gren-arlio]

So. Let me tell y'all about a guy named Camus. And a girl named Lala. And other folk. Welcome to Episode 14 of Waku Puyo Extras.

(Ah, back at it again writing these things.)

Hey guys, Gren here, and welcome to Episode 14 of Waku Puyo Extras, a series where I cover basically random stuff about Puyo and Madou as a whole. The Waku part is just because my brand is a single game I translate.

As my free time gets smaller and smaller, the drive to show off cool stuff remains about the same. Thank goodness school is over soon. I'm still alive, don't worry.

Finals and AP Exams are very much happening, so I'm spending that time studying. I'm hoping I pass.

Now, you would expect me to write about PPPP (P⁴ as I call it, Puzzle Pop in other locations) since it released and has a ton of stuff, notably well written characters. But alas:

I'm an Android user. Can't play it.

Frankly, at the moment, I'm not too interested in it right now.

So, the last episode was about Draco, that famous lass. What about this time? Well, since 80% of my work here is Madou related, why not give a showcase of some of the lesser known characters as a whole? Manga and novel stuff included.

With that, hope you enjoy. Also I said a bigger post is coming soon and drop it a literal month later. Damn.

So, Who ARE These Guys?

If you're not familiar with these characters, I honestly don't blame you. These guys are considered kinda niche in the franchise, but are more well known than some guys. I could mention Hanzo and no one besides people who played the game he's from or read the wiki would know him. Oh, or maybe Skeleton-D if we wanted to.

For now, I'll just cover the people have at the very least some stuff about them.

We'll begin with Camus, easily the most recognizable one that we'll be covering today. I swear if he was in Puyo now, he'd be so damn popular.

(From the manual of the Mega Drive release of Madou 1. Notable for being one of the very few times Camus is drawn with the teenage Arle and Lala, both 16, making Camus 18 in this.)

The man, or rather boy, in that photo is the fabled Camus of the Sable Ord- I mean Madou Monogatari 1, both on the SEGA Mega Drive and Game Gear. Since this is a game where Arle is in kindergarten, Camus is her senior. Yeah, senior is the word for this one. He's notable for being the only person to get a perfect score on his exams, that lucky bastard.

Oh yeah he's also like 8 years old for the record in that

In the game, he's both helps you and hinders you for different reasons. Sometimes he's very nice and teaches you things, and other times he's taking stuff from you for playing the game for longer than three hours.

However, at the end of the game (Where he also might help you depending on some stuff), it turns out he was an illusion all along, which is always...fun, you know? That one guy who's been helping you out turns out to not even be real, least in the Game Gear version of things.

Honestly? He's a pretty interesting guy in the game. Arle holds him with some respect, and Lala quite literally has a massive crush on the guy that she's willing to show. Unfortunately.

(Things are really serious in the Kindergarten Exam Fandom...)

He can come off as rude but at the very least he means well. And my goodness, his theme in the game is good.

Underrated gem.

Now, up until a while ago, I kinda thought that'd be the only games he was in, a grand total of 2 whole games. However, by doing this for...a year now, turns out that there IS one more appearance of Camus, presumably to be 18 in the game because...Well, Arle is a teenager there.

Arle Man'Yuki. Or Arle's Travel Log.

Now if I'll be honest, I STILL dunno all too much about the game, despite doing an entire episode on it. The game is super text-heavy, so I don't know EVERYTHING besides some of the Japanese history involved with it. (Crazy how the Heian Era is now some JJK meme. Time is a fun concept.)

Here, Camus has taken the role of the leader of the Shinsengumi, Kondo Isami. It's a long story, so... I'll just link my own work here. (I FINALLY LEARNED HOW TO PUT LINKS IN MY TEXT...)

I never covered Camus extensively in that game due to his admittedly small role in that game, but he's a fairly upstanding guy. Schezo works under him as the vice leader. Ain't that cool?

Check it out if you're curious about that, some basic Japanese history that may be a tad inaccurate, or JUMP HERO.

And err...that's every game he's from. Yeah, he's in a grand total of what, three games? It's not much but it's still something. He's a very cool lad.

-----

Wait, who's Lala?

I'm glad you asked, me. Lalah is a character from Mobile Suit Gundam that works with Char after he...well, this is a Madou blog. If only I could talk to you about Gundam. But alas.

Lala is ACTUALLY a girl who's the same age as Arle, and the girl who's madly in love with Camus...as I've told before. But she does have a little more than just that, don't worry.

In the Game Gear version at least, she sneaks into the tower Arle went into to graduate, upset that she wasn't the one to take the exam, but rather Arle. And yes. She broke a brick wall to get to her.

(A 6 year old is stronger than any of us. LMK if you can run into a brick wall just fine.)

Now if I had to describe her, it'd be "Arrogant but funny as hell". Because she's arrogant but funny as hell. Arle calls Lala her BFF, to which she doesn't take that reply nicely and says they ain't BFF'S, they ain't even friends. Straight hater energy. (She wasn't able to take the exam due to a cold.)

Camus appears to stop her from interfering, and she goes on this tangent about how wonderful he is, and how he always eluded her... and chases him, as shown more above.

Things start to get funky when you get deeper into the tower, as Lala makes a literal trap hole, and Arle falls down. However, Lala is mad that she fell and NOT Camus, leading him to appear in the floor above and basically say "Idiot. I'm not falling for that." and she continues to chase him.

Her reign of terror ends when Camus SEALS HER AWAY for the rest of the game. But she's okay after it all don't worry. Arle summed it up the best way I could. She ends up fine after the end of the game, however.

Lala also appears in Chaotic Final Exam too, now 16, but honestly...it's one of the games where I know next to nothing about it. Apologies. Just know that she's there and not Camus. (Though with the style of how the game looks...probably for the better.)

She's just overall what we call in the industry... a girlfail. She tries her absolute best but fails so, so much that I can't help but laugh at her and pity her at the same time.

-----

I have no cool segway into this section. Introducing... Rasp.

You might've seen them around if you've checked my blog here or there as a front page image for my works.

And you'd be right. Rasp is from the Waku Waku Puyo Puyo Manga, a brand new character just made for the thing. They're basically a minion who mostly impede the way for Schezo and Rulue. I say "they" because, well, Rasp is genderless.

Fun fact: Their salary is unknown, but they apparently get paid more than a Manga artist, so take that as how you will.

Rasp does appear frequently throughout the volumes, and does indeed fight Schezo. While they do lose, at least they looked pretty cool while doing so.

-----

Lightning Round:

Now these devilish goofballs are folks I want to show...but don't have much info on them just yet. Or there wasn't that much to begin with.

Septem:

(Creatura...La creature 98...)

Septem is another genderless character from the series, coming from Arle no Bouken, a game I know next to nothing about. All I know from it is them and that they cling to Arle like a sister. I love them.

This is absolutely one character I wish I knew more on, since she's much more developed as a character...I just don't know much about Arle no Bouken.

Dark Witch:

(What is this, a doppelganger bargain sale?)

Now she has a little more to her that I DO know but it's nothing spectacular.

Planned to be in Puyo N but was scrapped due to the idea of her being too serious, which is quite the reason for Puyo, but appears in Comet Summoner anyways as a final boss.

You can even play as her, and fight Witch herself and beat her... and possessing her. Kinda, sorta.

Runelord:

(Dweeb appeared in one game and changed a man)

Runelord is an odd case, because some of his lore is stuck onto True Madou Monogatari, which in of itself...is kinda iffy lore wise. And also really long.

In Madou S? Wants Schezo to be the next successor, he says no, fight happens, Schezo wins but is affected anyways. Apparently he was beaten by Lagnus, but that comes from True Madou, so the accuracy of the Canon can be very much debated. It all depends if you think it's Canon or not.

-----

And honestly, that'll be all for this time around. Apologies this took so long. Life's been quite the journey. Graduation's happening soon, and finals are happening soon. The list goes on. I'm hoping I get by through the school year, but alas, I'm happy you read this.

Adios.

[hustlemeanokay]

Ok. So. Historically, I have not been able to stomach some of Bioware's categorically obnoxious characters. Sera & Jack being the main culprits. Literally, it's nothing about their backstories or their in game missions... and everything about them personally.

And the rest is about Taash and because I go into some specifics, it's below the cut for spoilery spoiler stuff.

But - I actually like a lot of the things about Taash. Even though they're painfully young™. It's not even that, not really. It's two main issues though that stop me from being like 'omg this is one of the best characters ever!' 1. Their "mansplaining" and 2. How they lean heavily into being a hypocrite, quite often if I'm being honest.

I get that the game is using Taash as a mouthpiece a lot of the time for explaining stuff but like... it goes on a little too much. Taash explains everything to Rook in a way that is... well, like Rook couldn't know that and Taash must explain it. Even though the topic at hand can sometimes be obvious. Or, if Rook themselves is a Lord. And to hear that Taash has only been with the Lords for like 4 months? And Taash will stand there and explain core Lord stuff to a Lord Rook? Erhm. Yeah. It's just stuff like that. And then there's the eyerolling double standard that they seem to spit out.

One that I heard earlier: They tell Spite that he can't smell people/talk about smelling people without their permission and then in the same exact banter, will tell Lucanis that the very woman that they had just yelled at Spite about not smelling - smelled a certain way (and Spite then rightfully calls no fair). Taash will go on and on about how the Dragon King's name is stupid (which, to be fair - agree but also, not their call - and this was before we find out he's the one blighting the dragons/before he hurt Shathann).

Beside that, they're rude and disrespectful to Emmrich. It's one thing to be uncomfortable with necromancy and another to say someone's entire career/life's work is "wrong" when he's been nothing but considerate towards you. (Also finding out that they've straight up been calling him names and he's not retaliated at all? wtf) That's just fucking rude. They could have easily been like "whoa, cool it on the corpse talk". Especially if Rook is also a Necromancer/Watcher. Because like, if Rook asks Taash if their necromancy makes them uncomfortable - Taash straight up says "na, you deal more with spirits so it's okay" and it's like "when or where was that ever mentioned?" Because, no. Rook doesn't. At no point was that said or even implied. If Rook is a necromancer - in the game, they are a necromancer. The only thing they don't do is make the dead talk (or move because I'm guessing game mechanics/lack there of) etc. But at no point was it said oh hey, Rook deals with spirits. So, Rook's necromancy is okay but Emmrich's is not? That's messed up.

And okay, so if Taash is like this - that's fine and all but at no point can Rook call them out on this. At no point can Rook stand up for Emmrich. Or Spite. I mean, if we're going to go the Rook necromancer deals more with spirits thing then Rook should be able to go "uh, yeah, so Taash, how about you don't talk to Spite like he's a fucking dog? That'd be great." Especially if Taash pulls the "I'm from Rivain and we have a lot of spirits" card. Because, Rivainy people don't treat spirits like they are lesser.

And it's really shitty because there's so much potential there. Because I do like Taash. I like that they're not overly obnoxious. I like how their voice actor gave them that kinda don't give a fuck attitude in their voice. But it goes too far with the writing. Because there's a line between not caring what other people think and being a shithead. And soft Taash? Forget it - they can be sweet as hell. But there are just these parts that are like... damn.

[noaltbruh]

um, 🍭 and 🍰 for anasui and weather report? congrats on 200 follows btw ^^

One of them is among my favorites in part 6, I would gladly burn alive the other.

Guess who's who.

On a more serious note- Of course! And thanks for the request :)

~~~~~

🍭 How easy is it to fluster them?

When it comes to Anasui, it really won't take much to fluster him. This dude doesn't just love you, he's obsessed with you, which means that literally anything you might say to him will get him to turn all red and bashful.

To be honest, maybe you weren't even trying to flirt with him, he just interpreted your words in his own way and now he's all flustered even if it wasn't your intention in the first place.

It is pretty funny though, and also cute in a way. He'll probably go "awww stawwp" despite the fact that he'd dying to receive any sort of attention from you, especially this kind.

So if you're not very confident in your flirting skills, don't worry, you'll never have to worry about them not being good enough for him.

~~~~~~

Is...Is it even possible to fluster Weather?

To be completely honest with you, trying to affectionately tease him won't get much of a result most of the time. He doesn't really understand how flirting works, and is either confused or unfazed by most of your attempts.

Let's say, for examples, you were to compliment him more than usual. I can see him mostly just smiling and thanking you rather than blushing and such. He doesn't mean to be so detached, he can't help it. He thinks you're just being affectionate and nice, you are his partner, after all.

I could potentially see him getting flustered, but only on very specific and rare circumstances. When that does happen, Weather doesn't really...Understand what's going on? He just feels his cheeks getting warm and all of a sudden he's struggling to even look at you.

He'll probably try to go back to his usual composure as soon as he can, but he'll spend the rest of the day thinking about how... Interesting that felt.

🍰 How teasing are they? Do they often flirt with their S/O?

Anasui is a flirting bomb fr. Dude's teasing and complimenting you literally all the time you two are together, he's incapable of spending more than 3 minutes without praising or remarking something about you.

Now, quantity doesn't equal quality, and he's the living proof of that. With this man it's kind of a fifty fifty situation, he'll either come up with the smoothest compliment and flirting style humanity has ever witnessed, or the cringest pick up line ever that will probably make you burst out laughing.

When the latter happens, it's quite entertaining to watch, because your reaction will actually make him blush instead.

He's not afraid to get close either, and physical contact is actually one of his favorite ways of flirting with you, whether that'd be neck kisses or grabbing your waist.

~~~~

Weather IS good at flirting, but like, accidentally lol.

The thought of getting you bashful doesn't even cross his mind because, like I said, he doesn't understand nor know what it is or how it works.

I can see Anasui trying to give him some advice on how to flirt with you, but he wouldn't follow them because he doesn't trust his judgment in this sort of thing or at all

With that being said, this man will turn you red without even trying. He'll get very touchy and compliment you with no filters whatsoever. If he has something nice to say about you, he'll say it without thinking twice. Adding in to this, the calmness and and composure in his voice will make everything sound way smoother than he intended to be.

[georgegraphys]

To be honest, I would not fully trust Ola Kallenius either despite his words backing George. Why? Because he's a part of this big multinational corporation and this multinational corporation is FAR from the word 'good'.

But what we're talking about is taking advantage of George being favorable in their eyes for now. Read that 'for now' again. To manipulate the long terms, you need to take advantage of what is happening in short terms first. You can't be thinking too far ahead, overthinking and speculating about things, and making rash decisions over some speculations. That'd be a self-fulfilling prophecy. You can't play the short game when you're in a position like George. You have to play the long game.

If I were to be REAL honest here, I do want George to take Red Bull's offer back in 2021 because they're great, they're fast, they're amazing. But looking at the other aspects here, you wouldn't want him to be there. You should stop seeing things from just a two dimensional perspective. Moving teams solves nothing and i think we learnt enough from several drivers who made the wrong choice due to greed and being impatient.

In every part of an organization, there is something called homeowners. Just like Max's home is RB and Charles' home (might be) is Ferrari, George's home is Mercedes. And that is a solid thing for 2-3 upcoming years unless something happened. Why do i say so? Because these teams aren't the backmarkers where everyone is replaceable, they are the frontrunners with big brands behind them that not only values winning and racing but also values loyalty, brand image, and more. What they're also trying to find is someone who could be the face of the team for a long time not just 2-3 seasons and dip.

And let's take things real here. If Mercedes did NOT value George, they wouldn't pressure him to make a decision between choosing BMW or Mercedes very early in his formula series career. Why is it important? Because if George is not important to them, the moment George rejects Toto for Carlin Volkswagen is the moment they back out and move on. But they didn't. That is exhibit one.

Exhibit two is that in 2018, Mercedes is torn on who to give an F1 seat. Ocon or Russell? We all know the answer in 2019. Exhibit three, in 2020 when George's 2021 seat is threatened with Williams, Red Bull allegedly offered Mercedes to 'lend' George out to them for a year but Mercedes REFUSED because they do not want George outside of their institution even for a year (even if that 'lend out' move benefits Mercedes because from there Mercedes can see how George performs in better car). They'd rather George go jobless and drive in DTM for a year rather than lending him out to Red Bull. If Mercedes does not care about him, they would let him leave just like they let Ocon leave to go to Alpine.

And fourth, we have Kallenius basically on Toto's neck about how he wants George on that seat and not Max or Valtteri or whoever Toto wants. Then we also have Mercedes literally going feral on the mention of George going somewhere else (read: RBR). This happened on the same day as the British GP

My point here is if they do not give a shit, if they do not at the very least back George up, they would have let George go in 2021. And if you're saying "but that's 2021, Ari. We're talking about now", then look at his previous contract renewal. We're supposed to have George's silly season THIS YEAR because his original contract with Merc is supposed to end this year but we DIDN'T! Why? Because the contract is already renewed somewhere in December 2022 or Spring 2023! Again if they're planning to replace him, they would not make him sign a contract just for several months to his Merc career. And to add on top of that, George literally talks about how his contract is so EASILY signed and Mercedes and him were giggling over it like a married couple while LH and Mercedes (read: Kallenius) were in trenches, fighting endless war for a contract negotiation.

We cannot be 100% sure on the long run on who backs who even with Max in Red Bull. There is NOTHING certain in F1. Things change drastically. This is a very dynamic sport. But to manipulate the longer term, you need to take a hold of shorter terms first. If Kallenius, for now, sees George in a favorable place, that's good. But if in the future, he doesn't then it is what it is. It's business. You can't be idealistic about it. Moving teams is NEVER the solution unless you want George to make a decision blunder like other drivers who weren't patient enough.

It is painful but we have to play the long game.

[hauntedwizardmoment]

Also I’m haunted by your tags and LJ2 hookup bc it takes being with j2 for j4 to reconcile with j3. He literally never stops being a manic pixie dream girl for someone else’s relationship or growth. And j2 doesn’t make j4 cry the way j3 does. but also it’s like. I don’t know if she could conceive of herself being with someone like j2 when she can’t reconcile how different they are. In regards to their feelings on the Pantheon. And at least he doesn’t give her all this doubt the way j3 does bc she knows where she falls but. She’s always kinda convinced herself that she might be able to save j3, rescue him from the torment nexus. J2 being primed to love Porter is what made her write him off as a lost cause & like. She feels bad abt that but is she right? (But maybe they can still all make it together maybe they can!!!)

GODDDDD when j4 wants to save him and j2 is like "there's nothing to save me from, i'm already safe"

like i think. they have a single conversation about this. "true believer acolyte" to "atheist heretic" because j2 makes it easy to be emotionally honest (part of the reason she can't trust herself around j2. he's so sweet it makes it easy to give up parts of yourself to him and then try to control him. like porter does). and she tries to find a single part of him that would doubt porter and can't. and i think she concludes from this that not only is there just no way to get him out of porter's hold, but if she somehow miraculously did, he'd be the same way with her. and that'd bring out her worst impulses. and she can't do that to him or to j3 or to herself.

and once she realizes that j2 treats her like he treats porter. i think that prompts her to get back with j3, bc even if he makes her cry, he fights back and gives as good as he gets. which in a way is so much more porter-coded than just staying with j2 and allowing him to wrap himself up in her. like j3 is literally just her version of jace. and j2 is always j2, always second pick, always trying so hard and never making the cut because perfect isnt good enough for anyone.

[polyhexian]

The more I think about it the more I love the Jasper/Enoch rivalry.

Well, to be fair, I think Jasper actively hates her, and she's just there. She's murder daughter because she sees murder as the best way to achieve her goals, not because she enjoys murdering people. She's not looking for a fight, she just calls it as she sees it, and she sees Jasper as un unimpressive wimp who failed to kill Belos because he was too sentimental.

Enoch: I'm just saying, you could totally have killed him if your feelings hadn't gotten in the way.

Jasper: EXCUSE YOU, IT TOOK A LOT OF EFFORT FOR ME TO RECOGNIZE THAT I WAS CAPABLE OF FEELINGS.

Enoch: Yeah, ironic.

Jasper can't comprehend this kid. She knew she was a person?? with EMOTIONS??? AND SHE THREW THEM AWAY??? Jasper took 12 years to come to terms with the fact that his feelings WERE real and they DID affect him and they DID matter and meanwhile this kid had just decided emotions were useless and didn't bother with them??

Jasper: HOW was someone who HAD emotions and KNEW she was a person BETTER at locking all those feelings away than I ever was??

Enoch: Skill issue.

Jasper: AKLSDJFDKASJFJDSLKAHDJFKAASDFKDSD

Caitlyn: To be fair, I didn't exactly do a good job modeling feelings for her.

Jasper sobbing around a bottle of god-knows-what while Caleb awkwardly pats his back and Jasper's like "Hunter's gonna end up like ENOCH."

Tell: Okay on the one hand I can see how that'd be distressing, but Jasper, that IS my kid.

Enoch: No, no, he has a point. I still failed to kill Belos. We should be hoping that Hunter is even better than me at killing Belos. *watches Hunter follow his uncle around with stars in his eyes* But in all honesty he's shaping up to be a spectacular disappointment.

Jasper: YOU TAKE THAT BACK.

She doesn't really hate Hunter, probably. She thinks his loyalty is stupid, obviously, but like. When he was a baby she just saw him as an obstacle Jasper failed to overcome, and as the Golden Guard she's like "when I was his age I was actively plotting an assassination", and after Hunter runs away she's like "well he's got half the right idea now that he knows the truth but of COURSE he's just running away, ugh" and then Hunter attempts to murder-suicide himself and Belos and she's like OH YES FINALLY OKAY RESPECT ACQUIRED GET IT BOY!

She probably can't even fault him for not succeeding in killing Belos. Like that wasn't his fault. He gave an honest shot at it and for all we know the only reason it didn't work is cuz Camila pulled Hunter out of the water which let Belos depossess him.

She just judges everyone by how close they got to killing Belos and what made them fail, and the people who get judged the harshest are the ones who came close but failed for whatever she perceives as a stupid reason. Virtue, John, Temperance? Not even worth judging over this, they were too stupid to even think about killing him. Dust? An attempt was made, not a very good one but it's not like he had much time to think about it, he can have a You Tried sticker. Miles? Should've used those bombs on BELOS, yeesh, and he was more concerned with running away than with killing the guy, BUT he earns a lot of points for spending his final moments writing out a warning to anyone who'd come after, which may eventually lead to Belos's death, so A for effort. Jasper? Colossal disappointment, oh my god, you literally HAD HIM, IF IT WASN'T FOR THE BABY YOU WOULD'VE KILLED HIM, GOD. Hunter? Disappointingly brainwashed, but the moment he decided to kill Belos, he WENT for it, and she can respect that.

Luz? Oh my god she's probably so pissed at Luz. Like. You beat him! You literally beat him! You had god-given powers the likes of which no witch has ever been graced to wield, you took him out when he was arguably at his most powerful, and YOU DIDN'T EVEN TAKE THE SHOT?? YOU LET THE RAIN DO IT? AND THEN YOU LET RAINE AND EDA AND KING DO IT?? WHAT DOES IT FEEL LIKE TO WASTE MY DREAM???

So yeah, just. Jasper actively hating Enoch, and Enoch passively hating Jasper.

Jasper: HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT???

Enoch: Why are you booing me? I'm right.

In the far distant future, Darius passes away from old age, and one way or another, he's finally going to see Jasper again--

Darius: Jasper. I spent sixteen years having beef with a child, and then I felt extremely bad about it, and strove to become a better person. And now I have died, and I find out YOU'VE spent the last SIXTY years having beef with a child??

Jasper, glaring at Enoch in yet another staring contest: When I first met her, she'd been dead longer than I'd been alive.

Darius: I just feel like maybe I beat myself up a little too much regarding how upset you'd be at how I treated Hunter.

Jasper: YOU were a dick to a brainwashed child soldier who needed healthy adult relationships in his life because you were misplacing your anger and grief. I am having a mutual standoff with someone who ACTUALLY believes I'm a failure for NOT LETTING MY BABY DIE, and who continues to be a bitch despite having DECADES since her death to figure out how to not be.

Enoch: I don't "believe" you're a failure, it's just an objective fact.

Jasper: ALSKDJKSDAJFKLJDSKLFSDKLFK

Darius: I can see why your ortet keeps the liquor cabinet well stocked.

Uruwydhfjdijebrg riqyshJFGHEHAH I'm fucking OBSESSED jasper having genuine beef with a fifteen year old and desperately trying to justify why that's different from Darius having beef with hunter and he has a lot of points but he keeps saying "SHES OLDER THAN ME LIKE SHE LIVED LONGER THAN I DID AND SHE HAD SO MUCH MORE AGENCY AND ALSO SHES BEEN DEAD LONGER THAN I WAS ALIVE LIKE COME ON

Enoch: Darius you were mean to a brainwashed child soldier. How could you possibly not see what was happening and realize it was evil?

Darius: I know, and you're right, I should have been kinder. I wish that I-

Enoch: how could you not see Belos was evil right then and there?? Like, he killed your boyfriend and you didn't even murder him for it?

Darius: I mean. I.

Enoch: pussy

Jasper: come on

Darius like okay I get why JASPER is still here watching hunter sixty years later but why are YOU still here

Tell: Enoch won't leave

Enoch: for the bit, mostly

Enoch fucking... ROASTING previous Grimwalkers.

Miles: Had no reason to seek vengeance yet. Passable if only because he is so early in the timeline respects the viciousness of his ending. The anger and the commitment to warning the future.

Virtue: loser who died too fast and didn't learn to think for himself

Dust: easily manipulated but most of them are since they've been groomed to be. Hard turned at the end, respect. Willing to take child hostage +10 points for commitment. Ultimately a failure but she'd share a beer with him

Temperance: idiot loser who didn't even learn anything

Caleb: you RAISED his ass and didn't see he was an evil fuck? Wow. Yeah sympathy is great huh tell that to the kid you didn't raise shit lips

Jasper: you're the fucking worst oh my god. You had the best chance and threw it away. Absolutely pathetic. You're grounded kid

Tell: lame dad. Complacent and pessimistic. I want a bed time story but also you're mid af

She's just like. The worst. They're all dead they've had to get past the point of "she might actually be evil and I don't really want her here" and just have to live with this thing in the house and she's emboldened by the fact she is tolerated

[kotamagic]

Lore Olympus this week unveils not only where Persephone has been all day, but how there's now a baby Dionysos.

Given how wonky Greek mythology is, between people and gods turning into different things and why things are the way they are in the world, Zeus giving birth from his leg?

Pfft, please. That's just a Tuesday on Olympus.

True as it may be that mortals are fragile and, yeah, mortal, I'm calling bullshit on part of this.

In the original myth, Hera knew about Semele being pregnant. The Queen of the gods disguised herself as an old woman and convinced her dumbass husband to appear before Semele in his true form. Since mortals aren't meant to see that, Semele pretty much EVAPORATED on the spot.

If we recall, Zeus isn't the most honest god on Olympus. FFS, more like the LEAST honest. Remember that bullshit he fed Demeter about Hera marrying him being Hades' idea? Forever reigns the lies and bullshit....

Speaking of Semele, she looks lovely here. Pity we didn't get to see much more of her.

Appreciate the pottery-style art here. Those stitches make his leg look like a football, though.

Which also leads me to another point -- besides the stitches, what other proof was there of pregnancy? Real world women get round and swollen during pregnancy. I didn't see Zeus walking around with a fat thigh. Did you?

For all of these legitimate, important questions, all of Zeus' answers come back to "I don't want Hera to find out."

Asclepius should already have been aware since, you know, HE SEWED THE KID TO ZEUS' THIGH. Besides a threat from Zeus, what else was there to stop him leaking the secret to anyone?

Apollo was just a bad idea all around. He already tried to marry and SA'd Persephone to get at her fertility goddesses powers. Zeus is onto him, so getting him involved is a big, fat NO.

Eileithyia might have ratted Zeus out anyway. Unless I'm mistaken, she HAS to be present for a birth to occur. Her being the goddess of childbirth means she WAS present in some way for this. Before Artemis & Apollo were born, she was actively delayed and prevented from going to Leto.

Or was that another childbirth goddess that I forgot the name of?

Persephone seeing the similarity between Dionysos and baby Hades likely triggered her. She literally jumped from the dream dive to this, so what she saw is still very fresh in her mind.

Also, baby Hades in the last pic, despite looking anxious, is CUTE!

Zeus.... that face.... I fucking CAN'T!

(He deserves all the pain he's about to go through.)

Typical Zeus, dumping off his demigod progeny with someone else to be THEIR problem instead of his.

Refresh my memory--- is that the same place/nymphs that raised Zeus after his mom fed Chronos a rock? If so, I guess I can see why that'd be his plan, but that's still a shitty thing to do!

...aaaannndddd Persephone goes into "Fuck you, he's my kid now!" mode.

Going back to what I wrote about the previous episode, if Persephone & Hades do adopt him, it might be Rachel's way of making the Dionysos/Zageus link stronger. Also, consider that Dionysos was "born" in the Underworld, and the goddess of childbirth was not present. That could be part of the stillborn origin of Dionysos/Zagreus.

Anyways, thanks for coming to my LO post!

[nerves-nebula]

abe death drawings make me feel weird. in like a “he def deserves this but it’s still horrifying” way. painful deaths, one slower than the other. i’m pulling a donnie and Not Looking. hoping to simply Never See Him Again. good art !

no literally. that's how i feel, sans being disturbed by it i guess. like im not doing this for my own catharsis lmao this does nothing for me (except makes me look up dead animals so i can draw gore better) this was just my campaign promise.

to be honest what i always want when it comes to abusers is for them to get better. that'd be the ideal outcome. but you usually can't have that, so instead i just want them out of my lives instead. and if i can't have THAT, then I want them DEAD so i dont have to worry about them.

but i don't take pleasure in painful or slow deaths. I'm kind of over wanting an excuse to torture people. Cause i know there are people who consider my existence enough of a excuse to put me in the "Bad, Monster, Subhuman" category and do whatever they want to me. so i can't help but be reminded of that whenever people are like "this person is a monster and deserves *insert very graphic violent disturbing thing here*" cause to me its like... what did you just have that ready? are you just looking for someone bad enough to justify that kind of cruelty?

HOWEVER. abe is fictional, and there is no chance for him to change because I decided he doesn't want to. so i dont feel bad about hurting him lmao.

[calmthefuckdownalright]

Dimensions AU

Okay I know is should be writing but I'm about to go to a big city for a Convention pretty soon and I will have plenty of spare time to write then.

So hear me out,

Technoblade is a piglin. He's violent and very heated. Nether. Obviously.

Tommy is Tommy and the closest to resembling Phil and in the Origins SMP he is literally his apprentice. Overworld.

Wilbur is often depicted as being a holder of a vocal power in many supervillain au's earning him the name Siren. What's a Siren? And underwater creature known for luring its victims to their death using their voice.

Well now you might be like "Well Vik that'd be overworked too right?"

Hahaha yes of course for this dynamic to work Qilbur must be from elsewhere. In the Minecraft community there's always talk of the Aether, a new dimension that people have been BEGGING Mojang to put into the game and now recently they want the Deep dark portal to be used for it.

So, I know very little of the Aether because I have no money to buy mods and I only have a gaming console and not a PC. (I use a laptop to write not the same thing).

What I do know about the Aether is its very much like the End in a way in terms of building style. Floating over an abyss and very dangerous.

"Well Vik why don't you just make Wil from the End-"

BECAUSE THIS IS COOLER AND IT FITS BETTER.

Everything I've seen of the Aether is a kind of blue tint to it. Ghostbur our beloved is still Wilbur and blue is a central part of his being. In Tommyinnit's Clinic for Supervillains, Siren is dressed in blues and blacks. Wilbur bleeds blue (in some headcannons) and in the QSMP Wilbur is often drawn as having a blue scarf as a tribute to his past (idk if that's Ghostbur/Dream SMP or just the UK but that's how I see it).

And for some reason I now associate Wilbur with the Aether and let's be honest, Aether just SOUNDS cool and who is cooler than our MIA of Minecraft streamer himself? This might be a difference of opinion but it all links up now.

Technoblade is from the Nether and Phil found him in a raided Bastion.

Tommy is his biological son gifted to him by Kristen (Kristin I can't find a clear answer how to spell her name (MUMZA))

And Phil found Wilbur during his adventures through the dimensions.

If you want to get technical with it, Phil found Wilbur first after he completed all he wanted in his life in the Overworld and decided to try his hand at the Deep Dark where he killed the Warden and unlocked the portal to the Aether.

After that he took Wilbur to the Nether to pick out cool stuff to put in his room where they found Techno and Wilbur proceeded to find a friend in him and Phil just adopts him as well.

Techno and Wilbur grow up as brothers and Mumza finally visits with a surprise. Tommy with his weird little wings and abrasive attitude.

To round it all out, Philza is originally from the End. Specifically I think he was a friend of the dragon and lived in an End City structure that kind of just merged with itself until it basically became an End Castle. He met Mumza when he accidentally got caught in the void and she helped him up.

-Classic love story insert here-

Anyways, someone comes along and kills the dragon which ends up in Phil getting angry and killing them but in the process he is knocked into the now open portal to the overworld and he can't get back. So instead he builds himself a home and conquers all that he can before going and looking for his way back to Mumza.

Bam how's that sound? I saw a piece of fanart on Pinterest that showed the little versions of our Brother Trio and I can't find it again so now I'm upset and just wrote it down instead.

[apupp3tw0-strings]

Peace in the Darkness

Date: October 9th, 2131

Pretty much since leaving for the first time, I kept thinking about going back to the Dark World. CK kept texting me about how he's been visiting with Kris and I finally managed to convince Papa to drive me to Hometown again a few days ago and again today. I'm still jealous that CK can come here whenever he wants.

In the three total days I've visited, I've mostly just felt this sense of... peace in Castle Town (which is apparently the official name of this city in a closet). It's so... mysterious and wonderful and magical. And even if Kris hasn't really shown us around outside of the castle, I really like it here. There's just... something about it that I like more than the outside world, that I can't exactly place.

And then there's Spamton. He's... well a little weird and eccentric if I'm being honest, but still nice. It's given (er, well, sold) me at least two more of the weird potions Kris won't let me drink, and some frayed bowties and weird blue eggs? (They remind me of robin eggs and I put them with my collection at home, so I think they're eggs at least.) That and all the offers and deals he keeps giving me I think show a form of friendship, right? I mean, that's the sort of stuff I talk about with my other friends. Except for CK I guess, but he's my cousin so it's a little different.

Anyways, the last time I was here, Spamton mentioned not having a good night's rest in a bit because its bed was literal trash (which like, figure of speech right so I know it's not literally garbage and technically should be figurative but also I didn't correct it because I've picked up that people don't like me correcting stuff like that). So today I decided to make him a gift and give it to him! I spent like, all of yesterday making this little red race car bed out of cardboard. I even stole- I mean barrowed, Rexi's doll to get the measurements right. (The fact that Spamton is almost literally the size of my brother's porcelain doll is kinda baffling but that'd also be rude to bring up.) I hope Spamton liked it. I mean, I think he did. Its eyes went dark for a bit and then it sorta started crying? Felt kinda awkward but I'm taking that as he appreciated the gift. After Spamton was done crying it immediately tried to sell me another weird potion before Kris shut it down.

CK also seems to be getting along with Jevil, even though Kris is concerned by how well the two of them are getting along. I think I've heard them mention how they've had to stop those two from getting up to double the mischief and pranks. ...Also how they almost burned something down the other day. (I know CK's magic can get a little out of hand at times but goodness gracious!)

Kris also said they plan on showing us around soon. Even if they won't say how soon "soon" is. Most of the time CK or I have been in Castle Town, they've been doing a lot of checklists and talking to people and stuff. What they say is their duties as "Ambassador and Guardian of the Dark", whatever that means. I'm just excited to eventually get a chance to explore this city a little more. Everything looks so exciting and new, I wanna see what everything is.

[tornad001]

so i've been thinking about Israel, as one is wont to do following a terrorist attack from Hamas. this post is really not gonna sit well with a lot of my family but i can't sit by and continue to say nothing, to keep my mouth closed. to work under the double standard where they can praise Israel and shit-talk Palestinians freely, knowing Austin and I dont agree, but if i provide any pushback or counter-narratives, I'm the one being loud, pushing an agenda, making things political, causing trouble, etc. They use their connections as Jews with family living in Israel to justify their bad politics, but think me disingenuous when I claim my position is driven by the same connection. theirs is fine, cuz it leads to their politics, but i must be lying or mistaken or i don't really care about them for real or whatever bullshit they say at that time. but im gonna say what i have to say and they're welcome to ignore it if its too much for their political fragility.

there's a phrase i've been really into lately - informed simplicity. the world often gets more complex the more we know about it, and dealing with historical contingency is one of the better examples of this. but i never learned about it growing up. i was taught history as a series of "this group did this thing and that guy did that thing" rather than as a rich tapestry of political struggles and factional infighting and, yes often violence. but while history is complicated, where we're at is at times quite simple. yeah there's endless complexity to delve into the region's literal millennia of history, but thats then and this is now. Israel is wrong. its that simple.

but what makes it simple? it comes back to power and who has the ability to effect change, and in every single meaningful way, Israel has the political power, both locally and internationally, to change things and have intentionally denied Palestinians this political power. Gaza doesn't even have control of its own water supply, food sources, they have no freedom of movement, its the largest population density in the world and its ALL ghettos. meanwhile, the Israeli government has been pushing a project of settler colonialism to try and slowly wrest back control all for itself. take into account Israeli politics, the rise of Jewish Fascism, the frankly outright eliminationist rhetoric, the fact that its been decades now since there was any real push for peace or compromise, and where does that leave Palestinians?

the problem is that Israel has signaled time and again that it is fully committed to the eradication of the Palestinian people. to support this, i direct your attention to my mom and grandma (ill leave grandpa out of this for now) who I have heard with 0 reservations or qualifications say that all arabs could drop dead instantly and that'd be ok by them. and that's unfortunately not a radical position to hold if you poll the Israeli public. its actually outrageous how fucking bloodthirsty they are as a society and how open and honest they are. at least american Nazis have the good sense to not (usually) just outright say they wanna do Holocaust Part II Electric Boogaloo. and when they do, they're shunned by other Nazis for being bad optics. in Israel however that kinda rhetoric is just par for the course, with politicians regularly calling for increasing horrors to be inflicted on the palestinian people with no political consequences for them, they're just allowed to say that.

lemme relay a story i was told by an IDF officer while on birthright. him and his squad were sent to a Palestinian house at 3 am on what he admitted was not solid enough evidence for a warrant. when they got there they knocked, wait no they bashed the door down and rushed in with guns aimed. the family was about 8 ppl, 2 of whom were children. after arresting the 2 adult men, they proceeded to "tear up the place" (again this was his words, not my editorializing). they found nothing to give any indication anything bad was going on, but they still arrested the men "just in case". as they're leaving to go, he sees one of the kids, a young girl around 7 who was torn from her bedroom out of nowhere in the middle of the night and he personally had overturned her entire room, all her belongings. he explained that he had no choice but to step on her stuffed animals to make sure there wasn't anything inside. but he did feel a bit bad about stomping a kids toys right in front of her, and thats when it got wild for me, listening. he starts on about how he had this moral dilemma where he didn't know if he should bend down and clean up some of the room HE just DESTROYED, but came to the conclusion that he couldn't do that, cuz it would expose his back to (again, his words) "the enemy". the enemy here being a little girl, her little brother, and 4 women (cuz they already arrested the men, remember). oh and the 6 women and children here were being held at gunpoint with their hands above their heads, very scary group, i know, you're quivering how could u not. its just... something else to see someone so clearly and repugnantly warped by their hatred and fear of this group of ppl that hes describing an unjust raid on innocent civilians in this way. the paranoia on display was incredible and his inability to understand why the Palestinians might, ya know, HATE him and his ppl for what they've done and continue to do was even more so. thats the kind of brain-rot that this political rhetoric engenders.

lets look a bit at the Jewish Fascism tho, especially in contrast to Christian Fascism in america. just as the problems did not begin with donald trump but have been building in american politics for over half a century, the same is true in Israel. Netanyahu's far-right government isn't a bug, its a feature. The fate of the Israeli far-right has always been tied to the success of radical Islamic jihadis AND THEY KNOW IT. thats why they helped and funded Hamas, along with other extremist groups, and have to this day. because terror justifies and drives people towards reactionary right wing fervor. you have the perfect setup for fascism in terrorism, almost necessarily. its the perfect example of a threat which is everywhere and overpowering, but also weak and ineffectual. cuz terror attacks kill a lot of people and scare even more, but what they don't do is fundamentally challenge the status quo - its political violence that doesn't actually threaten to change anything. its a natural outgroup to other and spread hate about. in the US we usually default to immigrants and queer ppl, but Israel has a built-in "enemy at their doorstep" narrative to call upon

to talk about what actually happened tho, lemme draw a comparison to 9/11. i like to be provocative in saying that "america deserved 9/11" but what do i mean by this? i DONT mean that its good or acceptable for civilians to be hurt in a terror attack or that any individual americans deserved anything that happened that day. however, america caused 9/11 to happen through its foreign policy choices, and so any blood toll from that day, i place on america's head. our reckless disregard for others caused us to engage in geopolitics that all but insured right-wing religious extremists gained power, then we go all shocked pikachu face when Al-Qaeda lashes out in a futile attempt to stick it to American hegemony abroad. and would you look at that, it somehow turned out that the anti-american terrorism actually... helped the then GOP president. right wingers LOVE terrorism cuz they know it engenders rught wing sentiment and grows their political power. i mean does anybody think we would've gotten the prriot act without 9/11? obviously not. and the Israeli right is also aware of this

i think this is where i should address my views on Hamas itself, cuz i don't like them, at all actually. i think they're actually kinda evil, as much as im comfortable using moralizing language like that. but they make sense, politically speaking. when you take away people's hope, u doom yourself as well as them. political doomerism is rampant and it always drives people to radical politics. cuz if you see no possible route for change in the future, why not join hamas? at least they're doing something. the problem tho is that Hamas ISNT a revolutionary group, they're fundamentalist conservative religious extremists. they don't stand for palestinian liberation, they stand for their own power and religious edict, and they don't care who gets hurt in that pursuit, not even their own people. they're authoritarians who regularly abuse their own population to crack down on dissent.

but again, Israel caused Hamas. their blood toll is on Israel's head. and you can spin it whatever way you like, there's only 2 paradigms of solutions - unification or elimination. unification doesn't necessarily mean a 1-state solution, but even a 2-state solution will require unifying your goals and action. the only alternative is elimination in some form or other. its unfortunately clear that Israel has chosen the path of apartheid, ethnic cleansing, and genocide. so no, i dont condone rhe attacks by Hamas, i mourn the dead and those rhat must live on alike. but this moment cannot be about a single terror attack, it has to be about solutions. and there will NEVER be a solution as long as Israel is violating international law so brazenly, defiantly, and with the financial and military backing of the US.

i find it incredible how opposed people can be in one breath to the idea of an ethnostate and then in the next breath they're cluelessly talking about Israel, not even realizing its definitionally an ethnostate. who had the great idea post-WWII, "ya know that whole Aryan ethnostate thing was pretty bad, lets make a safe place for a persecuted minority by giving them their OWN ethnostate (and by give we mean the forcible displacement of a million Palestinians from the land they've held for generations)". some fuckin genius, thats who, obviously.

i don't claim to have a perfect solution. there is no solution i can see that doesn't involve mass immiseration and many people left disappointed. but that doesnt give Israel the right to maintain an apartheid state. its another example of how neoliberal thought processes and a lack of systemic analysis are the death of progress. people look at this terror attack killing a few hundred people and they rapidly clutch their pearls to their chests cuz oh my what a disaster. but the conditions of the 2 million citizens in the gaza strip, that they take as a given, something that just is the way it is and be patient change will come, we promise, dont look at our actual policies and see that we absolutely have no plan of changing anything.

its a pattern of institutionalized pain and suffering being made invisible. think back to the demon in human skin that is Raegan. if any president "killed" as many people as raegan did with the queers suffering with HIV, they'd be put on trial. but his plan wasn't to "kill" them, it was to "let them die" a very different thing indeed. its how the US can justify the millions we killed and displaced in Afghanistan over the 2000 ppl that died in 9/11. oh but speaking of a 9/11's worth of deaths, covid at its peak was killing more people PER DAY than 9/11, but we don't do anything to hold anyone accountable for Trump's mishandling of the pandemic response. his pandemic deaths, Raegan's AIDS deaths, the millions of deaths in Afghanistan, these were all institutionalized, so they're fine.

Israel is the one with the political power to change things, not Hamas, not Gaza, not the Palestinian Authority, and not the palestinian people. any and all blood is on the STATE OF Israel's head and as long as they continue in their eliminationist statecraft, it will continue to be so. Israel's policies will continue to get Jews killed because the more desperate things get for the Palestinians, the more it'll look to people like their only slim hope of change is through the extremism of Hamas. i mean they call the Palestinians terrorists when they do advocacy, peaceful protest, or politically morivated violence, so if the rhetoric about them is the same no matter what they do...? its time to let it go. stop the institutional violence on the Palestinians, give them their human and political rights back, and stop making things worse through your stubborn clinging to fear and hate. and if you dont let those go, then the future terror attacks and tensions are also on your head. the blood of every single jew is on your head as well, and i can only pray its a greater burden than you can bear.

[tasmanianstripes]

Kiara X Kovu for the shipping ask.

OKAY SO

It's a good ship, typical bad boy x rebellious girl one but I'm a sucker for a bad guy getting redeemed through love. Plus, let's be honest, Kovu was a young adult manipulated all his life by his abusive mother who saw him as nothing more than a pawn in her plan for revenge, so he was less evil and more extremely conditioned to his way of life and thinking, and then goes "oh shit, my mum was wrong huh?" when he's brought away from that environment and realises the pridelanders aren't actually that bad.

It was a bit rushed, but I understand it's a Disney movie and there is only so much you can do in like an hour and a half, so it's not an actual complaint tbh. At least they don't fall in love during the course of one song like Kiara's parents LOL (to be fair TLK wasn't about their relationship so again, not an actual complaint)

For fandom stuff, I honestly dislike when people immediately marry them off to each other after the movie timeline's ended and give them cubs straight away, unless when they explore how this sort of rushing into a relationship and having children this young wouldn't be healthy for either of them? I mean, they're barely adults, they've known each other for like, what...a few weeks? And they just went through some rough stuff, Kovu especially with literal YEARS of trauma he's got to unpack and the loss of his brother and mother. Just give these two some time to breathe, God damn (unless it's about exploring how that'd dynamic work in actuality instead of the typical happily ever after bullshit, then I vibe with that).

And while this ship is fun, I do also like stories that explore situations where their relationship gets completely derailed. Maybe they were young and fall out of love soon after and regret rushing into things? Maybe Kovu can't deal with his trauma in a healthy way and let's it fester and eat at him, which turns him into a shitty partner and father? Maybe they go through a messy divorce? Honestly, you can do a lot with their dynamic, which is pretty fun. I might even have a preference towards stories that do go this route tbh, I think it's very interesting, even if I don't dabble with it myself.

[wouldntyou-liketoknow]

To be honest, I was imagining Cal using the meme as an excuse to pester Sam even more than he already does whenever they cross paths, but perhaps that'd be too expected.

Your idea is dripping with irony and I love it 😂😂😂

In fact. . .

___

Caliban's Experience with Cannibalism Day

[Scene: Caliban's house, specifically the main/normal kitchen. It's early in the morning, and R.D. is already up making herself breakfast. After a few minutes, Caliban enters, dressed and ready for the day.]

Caliban: Good morning!

R.D.: Oh. . ! Morning, Cal. Didn't expect to see you here so soon.

Caliban: *pauses as he looks through the refrigerator* . . .You didn't expect to see me in my own kitchen? In the house that we've been living together in for years now? *chuckles* How well have you been sleeping lately?

R.D.: *rolling her eyes* I just assumed you'd go to your den-kitchen first. Y'know, to get some "bacon or sausages" for your breakfast.

Caliban: *shrugs* Can't blame you for that. But no, one of my feeding days was just yesterday. I'm all good for now.

R.D.: *hums* Sure. I just figured you'd specifically make today one of them.

Caliban: Why?

R.D.: Because it's Cannibalism Day.

Caliban: *freezes in place, blinking for a few long seconds* I'm sorry, w h a t ?

R.D.: Today is Cannibalism Day. Didn't you hear me? *smirks* Have you been getting enough sleep?

Caliban: *starts shaking his head, laughing a little* Ah, so my humor is finally rubbing off on you. Good to know!

R.D.: Who said I was joking?

Caliban: I did, because A. today is literally Cinco de Mayo, and B. there's no way a holiday called "Cannibalism Day" would ever fly anywhere. Emphasis on the Cannibalism part.

R.D.: *shakes her head* It's not impossible for two holidays to fall on the same day. *pulls out her phone and taps at the screen, then shows it to Caliban. Sure enough, the very meme at the top of this post is there*

Caliban: . . .Well, if there was ever an age to celebrate memes, it's the one we're living in.

R.D.: Precisely. And you're the only cannibal I know, so. . .Happy Cannibalism Day, I guess.

Caliban: *chuckles, shaking his head* Thanks for the well wishes. *reaches out to pull R.D. into a hug*

R.D.: *reciprocates the hug, smiling* No problem.

___

[Scene: the abandoned subway tunnels that connect all of The Pentas Family's platform-office-dens. It's about noon now, and Caliban is currently walking and chatting with Murdock]

Caliban: Have any changes been made to today's schedule? Should I tag along for that job you'll be heading to later?

Murdock: *shakes his head* Nope. As far as I know, the others are all making progress with their own assignments. I've been watching this particular target for a couple months now; no matter what happens, I'll still end up having him right where I want him.

Caliban: *nods* Alright, then. So, I guess that just leaves me to bounce between you all? To make sure things are running smoothly?

Murdock: That's what it looks like. For now, at least. I'm sure you'll find a way to get back at us eventually.

Caliban: *raises an eyebrow* Get back at you guys for what, exactly?

Murdock: *raises an eyebrow right back at Caliban* For leaving you out of the fun. I can't even deliver tonight's target to you because the job requires poison; I'm literally on my way to pick said poison up from Aza right now.

Murdock: *starts waving his hands in over-exaggerated gestures, making even more over-exaggerated expressions as he goes* You'll probably want to have the next target while they're still alive, right? Because the amount of planning and work that'll take on both our parts might make up for the slight you've faced today?

Caliban: . . .I mean, don't get me wrong, that does sound appealing. *grins* Sounds like a meal to die for, even.

Murdock: *groans, facepalming and shaking his head*

Caliban: But why do you assume today's a slight for me? What do you take me for? Some twisted, bloody version of Tinkerbell? I can live without playing a part in everything for once.

Murdock: Today's Cannibalism Day, isn't it? *checks his phone before Caliban can respond* Yeah, it is. I thought out of all days for you to want to cook up some huge, elaborate scheme, this would be it.

Caliban: . . .Okay, I know I should be questioning you about that meme, because there's no way in Hell you actually thought I already knew about that. But I think I might just look past that because yOU MADE A PUN FOR ME!!!

Murdock: *freezes; his face shifts through shock and disappointment. He groans again* Ohhh, shit—

[The two of them are near the entrance to K.O.'s den. Just as they're about to pass the platform by, the door opens, and K.O. walks out. He's initially looking at his phone, but glances up just in time to see Murdock and Caliban.]

K.O.: *does a double-take* Oh—oh, hey Cal! Speak of the devil, huh? I was just about to text you!

Caliban: *nods to K.O.* Text me about what? Did something happen with the fights you'll be having tonight?

K.O.: *shakes his head* No, everything's still in place. I just wanted to let you know that The Boss gave me permission to have a death match! And it's way overdue, honestly. The upcoming opponent is a HUGE asshole. Do you want to come get the body yourself once I'm done, or should I take it to your den myself?

Caliban: *blinks; he's grateful and a little confused at the same time* Uh. . .well, either one of those options will work for me, but I guess it'll depend on the time. Thanks! What a lucky coincidence, right?

K.O.: *chuckles* I really don't think there's anything coincidental about it. It's Cannibalism Day, so, we've gotta act accordingly. But yeah, you're welcome!

[K.O. jogs off down the tunnel before Caliban can say anything else. After a few seconds, Caliban and Murdock resume walking.]

Caliban: *side-eyes Murdock* . . .Alright, what's the game here? Did R.D. put you guys up to this?

Murdock: *holds his hands up in a lame gesture* Why the suspicion? Everyone who's anyone knows about Cannibalism Day.

Caliban: *sputters* Well, I didn't!

Murdock: I find that hard to believe. Maybe you just forgot about it this year? We've been pretty busy for the past few months, so I guess I can't blame you if that's the case.

Caliban: Wha—no, I didn't forget about anything! You know why? Because I've never celebrated "Cannibalism Day" because it's just a meme I was only made aware of this morning!

Murdock: *rolls his eyes* Okay, calm down.

Caliban: I AM PERFECTLY CALM!

[The entrance to Azalea's den is further up ahead in the tunnel. Much like K.O., Azalea happens to poke her head out of the door just as Murdock and Caliban are approaching. Azalea quickly picks up on the argument]

Azalea: *clears her throat* Murdock, do you really have to antagonize my brother on today of all days?

Murdock: *points an accusing finger at Caliban* Hey, he started it!

Azalea: *hums sarcastically* A likely story. *Smiles as she turns her attention to Caliban* How are things going? I know you'll probably do your celebrating later tonight, but have you been enjoying yourself so far?

Caliban: *purses his lips; he's still frustrated and confused, but he always tries to stay calm around Azalea* . . .Yeah, I guess so. Can't really complain.

Azalea: *nods* That's great! Okay, so, I've got things to do with Murdock, and I know you'll have to be on the move for most of the day. But before you go, and before I forget—

Azalea: *reaches into one of the pockets in her waist-apron and pulls out a book. Specifically the novel, They Ate The Waitress? by D.N. Schmidt. She holds it out to Caliban* I know this isn't much, but I saw it at a cafe while I was out on last month's job. And, well, I have a feeling that you'll really enjoy it.

[Author's Note: Yes, I'm referencing a real, legit novel, and yes, it would absolutely be right up Caliban's alley. Look it up and you'll see what I mean]

Caliban: *carefully takes the book into his hands, smiling as he examines the cover* That's really thoughtful, Aza. I appreciate it.

Azalea: Of course! Today is basically a second birthday for you, isn't it? *laughs, holding the door open and gesturing for Murdock to come in* Oh, one more thing: I was talking with Johnny and Garret, and it looks like neither of them will have any bodies for you today. But Johnny said he's gonna drop a bottle of Sangiovese off at your place sometime. It's not Chianti or Aramone, but he says it tastes just as good!

Caliban: *nods, taking a subtle deep breath* . . .I guess I'll be owing him a favor for that.

[Murdock and Azalea disappear into Azalea's den. Caliban is left standing on the platform, blinking as he slides the book into one of his jacket's interior pockets.]

[Footsteps echo from somewhere even further up the tunnel. A silhouette in the shadows approaches Caliban, but it only takes a few seconds for him to realize that it's just Parker, who is half-carrying-half-dragging a very full bodybag.]

Parker: *stops short as he notices Caliban* . . .Well, damn it. There goes my surprise.

Caliban: *squints at Parker and the bodybag in turn* What surprise?

Parker: *chuckles* That was the whole point. *sighs and shrugs as he nods to the bodybag* Happy Cannibalism Day, Cal. It's last minute, but I figured you'd like it. And you'd better like it, since I had to pull so many strings to not have to drown this guy in saltwater or a chlorine pool.

Caliban: *numbly nods as he begins walking alongside Parker, slowly but surely escorting him and the body to his den*

Parker: *instantly notices Caliban's demeanor* What? What's that face? Where's the usual barrage of puns?

Caliban: I'm not sure I can afford to elaborate right now. . .

___

[Scene: it's much later in the evening. Caliban is now present at the aftermath of one of his peer's hit-jobs. He and one Sam Ryder (who's been dragged into Pentas shenanigans for the umpteenth time now) are helping the cleanup crew]

Sam: Soooo, how's Cannibalism Day been going for—

Caliban: *does a neck-snapping double-take and points at Sam* NO.

Sam: *takes a step back, holding their hands up in a defensive gesture* Hey, there's no need to bite my head off over a simple question.

Caliban: *eyes twitch; a smile tries to creep onto his face, but he's frustrated enough to squash it down* DON'T TRY THAT. DISTRACTING ME WITH PUNS MAY WORK A QUARTER OF THE TIME, BUT TONIGHT IS NOT PART OF THAT QUARTER, YOU HEAR ME?!

Sam: Dude, chill out! Did something happen earlier? I thought you'd be all excited and smug and taunting about a meme-holiday like this.

Caliban: You'd THINK that, wouldn't you? Well, if I'd actually known about this just a few days earlier, then I would be! I'd be ecstatic! But I can't be today, because it feels like everyone I know is in on something that I somehow never even thought of myself!

Caliban: Do you know how that feels?! To have something that should be so obvious and special hidden right under your nose until the very last minute?! It gives off some actual psychic damage! PSYCHIC. DAMAGE.

Sam: . . .

Caliban: AND ANOTHER THING! Just imagine if I'd had to spend a lot of time in PUBLIC today! If all the members of the family know about this meme, if even you know about this meme, then what's to say everyone in the Inlets doesn't know about it, too?! Can you IMAGINE how nerve-wracking that would be? What are the ODDS that someone could get a wild theory and COMPLETELY BLOW MY COVER WITH A MEME OF ALL THINGS?!

Sam: . . .I'm sure those odds would be pretty damn low.

Caliban: But pretty damn low does NOT EQUAL ZERO!

[A moment of silence passes by, seeing Sam stare at Caliban while he stares at nothing in particular, breathing heavily and almost shaking in place.]

Sam: I mean, I can understand that to an extent. And keep in mind, that extent is a very small one. But. . .well, at least this means you'll be a little more prepared for Cannibalism Day next year, right?

[Caliban throws his hands up in the air and storms over to a sofa in the corner of the room. Coincidentally, some cushions on said sofa are stained with blood. He lays down on one side of the sofa, hugging his knees to his chest and slowly rocking back and forth. Sam watches him, chewing their lip before walking through a door across the room. After a moment or two, Sam returns with a medical organ transportation container.]

Sam: Alright, you're obviously not in the best headspace at the moment. And this might seem like part of some weird joke against you, but I promise it's not. *hesitantly approaches Caliban. They pointedly set the container down near the sofa and back up a few paces*

Caliban: *doesn't budge from his position on the sofa, though he does glance at the container, and then at Sam*

Sam: There's a heart inside. Before all this, I just happened to be in the States when a mission fell into my lap. I don't have time to explain, and even if I did, it'd still be none of your business, but things got messy. And I remembered what you said about the heart being *can't help but grimace*. . .the best part. I know you rarely get a chance to. . .enjoy any hearts for yourself since they're so valuable on the Black Market, so. . .yeah.

Caliban: *eyes widen. He hesitates for a few seconds, then reaches down, grabs the container, and holds it to his chest as he curls back up* . . .Thank you.

Sam: *nods* Don't mention it.

Caliban: *now grinning manically; his frustration is still there, but he's definitely calmed down a bit* You really know how to. . . serve people best.

[If you listen very, very closely a rimshot can be heard somewhere in the distance]

Sam: I SHOULD'VE KNOWN YOU WERE GONNA PULL SOMETHING THAT! GOD DAMN IT, THAT'S WHAT I GET FOR LETTING MY GUARD DOWN—

___

I cannot believe how much time and effort I spent on this.

On a JOKE.

A JOKE that I probably DRAGGED OUT TOO MUCH TO BE FUNNY OR WITTY. 🥲

. . .Oh, well. Happy Cannibalism Day to my scrungly fanmade boi. Hopefully he'll have some more fun with it next year.

Thank you for indulging me, Sammy. 💞😂

happy cannibalism day! 🧠🫀🫁🦴

[roadtodeltarune]

Earthbound Week 2 Update

Hello!

Anyone who's keeping up with this is sure to assume that this week must have been lots of work done. Sadly, it wasn't. Due to things like work, distractions, and trying to do one thing in the game that took forever, I didn't get much done. Enough stalling though, what did I finish?

I left off at Dungeon Man. As promised, I tried to leave to get some items I missed in Scaraba, but I wanted to try getting back inside first. Turns out, I can't. I think this is because you can only go into him at certain moments and if I leave him before I complete the dungeon, then I've soft-locked myself. There might be a way around this, but I reloaded my save.

Of course, I had to read all the signs.

I'm happy for his transition, but I'm also terrified. I'm getting elements of body horror.

After completing his dungeon, he walked with us around the desert. Nowhere else to go, we went South.

I had to go through him again, but it was easier the second time. I didn't expect I needed a submarine to get to The Deep Darkness, though, I thought it was just in the forest on the left.

After arriving, I teleported back to Scaraba to get a broken item and the Piggy Nose. Getting back on track in Deep Darkness, I stalked up on items, organized my inventory, and got the new Multi-Bottle Rocket. Feeling ready, I went into the swamp.

Imma be honest, I don't like the swamp. The slow movement combined with drowning in the deeper parts makes the whole thing annoying. I think if they removed the drowning aspect, that'd make this area a lot better.

Oh, and I found a few Magic Truffles. They were a bit hard to find; I wish the nose gave better directions.

Deeper in the swamp, I found the reincarnated Belch, Puke. I'm happy for his transition, but I don't like him so he's gonna die now. At first, I was worried because a Spy didn't reveal any weaknesses, but on my second or third turn, I used the Multi-Bottle Rocket. After that, Grape came back and finished him off with his new move!

It was a cool scene, but I feel like it'd be cooler if I didn't defeat him so easily with the rocket.

We won the Casey Bat, the strongest in the game, but with horrible accuracy. I did some research into other weapons so I can see what's worth keeping. I didn't equip this, I already miss enough. Instead, my endgame weapon for Straw is the Gutsy Bat, so I'll be looking out for that.

I healed up at the shy village, but they were too shy to help progress the plot, so I had to leave. I figured I'd just backtrack to Summers or something, but that's when Red Apple Kid called me. Mid conversation, he was kidnapped! He was last seen at Dr. Andonut's Lab, so I ran there!

Winters had new enemies, but it wasn't too bad. What was bad was that Tony was kidnapped too! With Bubble Monkey's help, we went across the lake. I had to take the long way because I forgot the Pencil Eraser. But once we got to the lab, we found that the doctor was kidnapped too! With the new Eraser Eraser, the only thing to do was go to Stonehedge.

Lots of dangerous and annoying enemies were in my way! It took me a bit to find my way to the Exit Mice, immediately leaving because I was Homesick, low on PP, and wanted to get better items.

After doing some research, I got a map to use as a reference so I could more easily get through the first maze. I also found out the Starmen Super had a rare chance of dropping Grape's only weapon, the Sword of the Kings. Since his attack had been lacking and it's literally his ONLY weapon, it seemed worth it to me.

This search is what took me so long.

The sword has a 1/128 (0.78%) chance of dropping. Bad, but I've had worse. I've even gotten a few of these rare drops from other enemies in the game already!

What made it harder were the Atomic Power Robots and Starmen. They both spawned in the same area as the Starman Super. The Atomic Power Robots explode upon defeat, making them annoying at best and terrifying at worst. To avoid them, I went up and down the long ladder or hid in the corner to reload the room's enemies.

The Starmen weren't as bad, but their overworld sprite looked the exact same as the Starmen Super, meaning I had to fight both before deciding if it was worth it.

Combined with the fact this was in the middle of a dungeon, it was very draining. I'd leave occasionally to heal up or reorganize my items. When I wanted a break, I'd go a bit deeper into the dungeon to get all the items. I couldn't defeat the boss though, as a walkthrough told me that when the boss is defeated, all the enemies disappear. This was my ONLY chance.

Yes, I used a walkthrough, only for the map and for tips on how to get the sword.

An extra punch in the face that happened during this was that I found a DIFFERENT 1/128 item! The Starmen have a chance of dropping the Brain Food Lunch. It's a great item, but it felt like the game was laughing at me.

In the end, I started using the switch's save state feature to RNG manipulate and save scum. I pinned a Starman Super into the corner and battled him over and over. This was much faster than the previous option of reloading the room to get a good enemy group, defeating them all, and then doing it all again. However, it still took me around 30 minutes of just this.

The walkthrough tells you you should have a team average of 55 before trying this dungeon. When I started, my team average was 52. By the time I finished this grind, our average was 75. Straw, my highest leveled member, was at 79.

After a break to eat some food and drink some water, I felt good enough to fight the boss. First, I had to walk through this room. It reminded me of Mt. Itoi from Mother 1, giving me the same disturbed feeling. Red Apple Kid, Tony, Dr. Andonuts, and Dr. Saturn...

The boss was easy, not just because of the sword and our high levels, but mainly due to the Multi-Bottle Rocket. It's a great item, but maybe they should have introduced it AFTER this boss.

With everyone saved, I talked to the crowd and got the Saturn Ribbon. I was just wanting to read some flavor text, but this was great! Due to its luck boost, I wanted this as Bana's endgame armor.

Red Apple Kid said he returned the book to the library in Onett. While I was in town, I visited Mom and bought the old house. I have so much money now!

The book was annoying to find. I got confused because of the guy who ran into the bathroom. I thought he was hoarding it or something. The masked guy told me it was on the bookshelves, but I checked before and couldn't find it. I even talked to the Hint Guy. I almost gave up but decided to do a comb-over of the bookshelves. At the very end, I finally found it!

The last thing I did was go back to Tenda Village and cure their shyness, getting some weird conversations, food, and a bag of Dragonite as a reward. Next up, I plan on getting some horns to trade.

I'm surprised how little I finished this week, but I'm glad I was able to find the Sword of the Kings. That was a pain and I hope I never have to do something like that again. Honestly, it's my most hated part of this game so far.

Aside from that, I'm loving this game! I can't wait to see what happens next week. See y'all down the road!

[bearpillowmonster]

The Last of Us HBO

This show is sort of in a bad situation because it's an adaptation of a beloved property that's going to be criticized if you're too close to the source material and too far, not to mention it's a video game property which has a track record of being subpar to just plain bad. And then that game is one of the most well known games of all time so there's that.

To be honest, I haven't played the games but I'd be living under a rock if I didn't know a lot of what already happens. And how do you do that? How do you subvert expectations when everyone already knows the spoiler?

I have the advantage to look at this from a different lens than that of a fan but I still can't help but draw comparisons and I think that's partially because it's so baked in. A good scene to represent this with is the truck getaway. In the game, you have a third person perspective of Sarah so you're in the backseat while these guys drive recklessly. It's not the same exact scene but it serves the exact same job using the exact same technique. If you watched a scene with very similar dialogue and the same end point, but just different means to get there, what did you see? Is it worth seeing again? In a game, you can feel the vibration of the controller as the car backs up and the intensity of your surroundings and how they're invading your little bubble. The scene in the show does a good job of replicating that but does that mean you're missing something?

If you've played the Last of Us and didn't like it then I don't think this show will do anything for you. There are differences but I think they fundamentally have the same problems but I think that doubles for if you liked the game, I think you'll at least enjoy it for what it's worth for a whole other Last of Us revisit after the initial game, the remaster, the remake and now this. Neil Druckmann is still involved and you can definitely tell his fingerprints are on it, unfortunately they still have unnecessary cursing. (like, you don't need it to make it gritty, how many times do I have to tell you that?) People who were jerks are still jerks. There are better things about it, there are worse things.

The other guy involved, the freaking director, Craig Mazin and his stupid comments about video games. I just don't understand but first I'll give him a hand for actually walking the walk after talking the talk but I still think some of his comments are wrong and that they don't even make sense in this context when he literally uses video game techniques to make it happen but oh well.

I mean literally, despite never playing the game, I knew what must have been there. "Ellie, I'll give you a boost, drop that ladder down to me." Little stuff like that, but it didn't really feel forced or out of place. I see now where a Last of Us MMO could come in, sort of like making it an RPG where you can choose to fight or join the Fireflies, I think that'd be quite fun but from what I see, it's a battle royale.

Acting. Pedro. That's all. I mean, I got my space cowboy but now I've got the southern accent to boot, all he needs is a little hat and we're good to go!

Honestly, it's probably better taken episode by episode because aside from actively trying to make you dislike the characters in a specific way in order to care about them, there are a few really good episodes and even the bad episodes have good parts but they are dominantly bad episodes and just straight bad characters or characters that have no relevance but get spotlight anyway. That isn't to say that it's only the new stuff that's bad either, there's a lot of good new stuff too, it's just a mystery as to what you're getting in any given episode, you can normally tell "Oh, this will be one of the predominantly good ones."

The end. Though I knew how it would end, it felt a little bit short lived and I don't mean that in length, more like they were trying to get it done, like the moments didn't hit as hard as they should've because of one reason or another. It all feels pretty summed up. Dialogue was disappointing since it was the last episode and they have a short moment before it all goes down where it feels like they trauma dump rather than a nice payoff to seeing them slowly trust each other enough to reveal one's insecurities which is ironic considering….well, season 2 will answer for that but all in all, a decent video game product.