#what an emotional roller coaster. oof.

[holyblanchett]

The fact that it was multiple lesbian bracelets is what gets me. Both from a meta costuming point and an in'universe character point. Love it. (Also deeply heartbreaking given the episode and what went on, having Agatha decked out like that when her mother is calling her evil? Oof)

Rightttt like I seen several people trying to say the colors were off and I'm like are we seeing the same shit?? Also that entire episode was an emotional roller-coaster. Mother was really going through it.

[monnn]

>Winter Petal✧⁠*

Pairing: non-idol!Wonwoo x gn!reader

Genre: angst, angst and more angst, one-sided love, reader is LOVESICK for Wonu!! >o<"

Warnings: it's just gonna hurt a lot and doesn't end happily, so read at your own risk(I'm sorry)

WC: 3.1+

A/N: oof, hello folks. the past few weeks has been such a roller-coaster and I wasn't really feeling better. I'm doing better now and I hope you are too♡ since this was due for quite a while, it's a bit Ionger than expected. this is the last part of the unexpected series and I hope you have enjoyed it so far! I'll shut up now and let you read, so hold on tight and let yourself feel while reading this! a little song recommendation: I Love You So by The Walters on loop! @-@

part-1, part-2 here!

_________________________________________

PRESENT

Wonu was busy adoring Jiyeon, while your eyes were on him, Jiyeon’s voice snapping you out of your trance.

“You’ll be there as early as possible. I better see you at the venue, at least a week before. Please Y/N?”she goes on, from demanding to begging real quick.

“I'll try my best Ji. You know how busy I can get” you say, sipping your hot chai.

They were getting married.

Wonwoo was getting married and it wasn't to you.

The biggest heart break of all times.

The thought of Wonwoo being the first of your friends’ circle to be hitched, is beyond you. Wonu hated commitments, relationships didn't matter.

“I still can't believe you're marrying this annoying ass, Jiyeon. He must've really worked wonders for his previous eight lives” you say, playfully knocking Wonu’s head, signalling him to get off his phone.

“Are you really my best friend?! You're supposed to be happy for me!” he whines. You just laugh at him instead of replying. Honestly, you were happy for him. Though it wasn't something your heart desired for, you were happy to see Wonwoo happy. Even if it means that you won't ever have a chance with him. Maybe you'll eventually forget him, you think. Though that's almost impossible.

Almost.

“But I agree with Jiyeon. You need to be there ASAP, Y/N. You know how much of a wreck I turn into when I'm stressed. And all of us would have more time to spend with each other. I know how stressful all our lives have been and I'm sure we've all missed each other, so please?” he rambles, all in a single breath. As much as whatever Wonu told was true, you don't think you can physically handle it all. It’d be too overwhelming for you, with your emotions splayed out and heart on your sleeve, waiting to be ripped off by none other than the groom. So, you chose the safest option – to arrive on the wedding day.

“I'll try my best Wonu. I can only wonder how stressful it can be for the both of you, but I also know you guys are THE powerful duo who can overcome anything. So, I’ll root for the both of you, hoping everything would turn out well and I'll see you on your big day” you say, wearing a warm smile covering the growing pain in you.

The couple radiate the warmest of energy and nod at whatever you said as it’s nothing but the absolute truth. They've always been this way, unbreakable no matter what. You used to envy that, as your college-self wanted them to low-key breakup. You and Wonwoo were THAT powerful duo before Jiyeon came through, it was only human for you to be jealous of them. Now you just feel tender looking at them, there's no jealousy, which is truly surprising.

◇

Days pass by sooner than you think and you're on your way to the destination. As weird as Wonwoo can get, the wedding’s happening in winter instead of spring or summer like the others do. He was specific about this as he met Jiyeon in winter. Little did anyone know that the both of you met in winter too. Well, it was winter in your lives as you and Wonu were both loners. It’s almost fateful for the both of you to be stuck with each other for so long.

If only this wasn’t platonic, everything would be straight out of a well-written romance fiction. (haha, unlike this one)

Your said date a.k.a Seungcheol, had picked you up from your place early in the morning to drive you. Jeonghan had planned all this, since he can stay without a date as his sister was coming along. Cheol was great company, and he didn’t need to have conversations with you, making the whole scene feel alien. You were truly grateful for that, as you didn’t really have an appetite to digest the things spewed by others at the wedding. The weather was getting a bit warm for winter, making you roll your window down, feeling the sharp yet soothing breeze while you try not to feel like your heart’s about to be grilled because of the emotions you felt. Your thoughts were interrupted by Jeonghan calling Cheol, who’s phone was connected to the speaker. You pick it before he reaches, Cheol sending a small smile to you.

“Hey Cheollie, how far away are you guys?” you hear Hannie, enquiring like the mum he is.

“Hi Han, we’re an hour away. How’s it going over there?” you ask, warmth crawling up your cheeks.

“Hi Y/N!!! I can’t wait to see you,” he pauses, the boys screaming in the background as they hear about you. “These morons won’t let me speak to you, so I'm gonna hang up now and see you both soon!” he says, seemingly pushing Soonie away as he was whining over the speaker to you about not being there sooner.

Laughing, you almost hang up before pausing to ask something.

“Oh, and Han?”

“Yeah, love?”

“How’s he? Is he alright?” you ask, curiously.

Sensing how concerned you were, Han chose to not make it harder.

“He’s alright for now, babe. He’ll be okay. I’d ask about you but it’s way too early and I want you to be wrapped in my arms for at least 20mins before I ask you anything” he says, sighing in relief.

“Hannie, I thought WE were married!” Cheol whines, as you laugh at how he’s sulking over the affection Han has for you. It’s cute, how they’ve been each other's rock for so long and yours too. You’ve genuinely missed your friends so much, your heart aches a little at the instances where you avoided them to protect your peace.

Hannie’s giggles bring you back, as he replies saying that they’re over if Cheol doesn’t get us there ASAP. Now you’re dealing with a sulky Cheol, who’s whining at how Han’s pulling tricks always, though you can’t help but just laugh at your friends’ antics.

Time flies and you’re at the wedding, a whiny Chan and Soon clinging onto you as you walk. They lead you guys to where the others are and upon the sight of you, Han’s running over to you. He jumps on to you as you topple down, Hannie having no intention of letting you go. He asks about Cheol, who insisted that he can drop the bags in your room all by himself. You guys just lay on the grass for a bit and he gets up as the weather’s still a bit cold, to drag you inside the resort. Seeing all your friends made you tear up a bit, which led to all of you shedding a few tears as you guys hug the sadness away. It’s wholesome than sad, because of how much these idiots mean to you and vice versa. The friendships you’ve built with each of them is so darn precious to you and it’s baffling how you were ready to throw this all away, just for that one man. Who was now about to be married. Pushing this aside, you search for two of your other friends who were nowhere to be found. In the garden area of the resort, you find them caressing their own drinks. Mingyu’s got champagne while Jihoon’s in love with his whiskey. They’re still the same old dorks you met; you ponder over while walking towards to them.

“Already?” you say, startling the both of them as they were lost in their own drinking shenanigans.

Mingyu is the first one to get up, lifting you up while he gulfs you into him. He’s so warm and smells like home, you’ve missed this puppy.

“I’m so glad to see you, Y/N. Do you need a drink too?” he asks, ready to order one for you. You shake your head, not wanting to show up drunk at your best friend’s wedding. The minute Mingyu lets you down, you run to hug Jihoon. You feel tears stinging your eyes, heart feeling heavier than ever. Sensing that you need your time with Jihoon, Mingyu walks away telling that he’ll see you around and to contact him if anything. You hug him goodbye before turning back to Jihoon.

Honestly, he’s the best person to let your thoughts be and to just sit with it than avoiding it like a plague. Jihoon glances at you, ordering a glass of gin with ginger ale while you were settling down. Once the drink arrives, he pushes it to your side, signalling you to have it.

“Jihoon....I can’t” you say, hesitantly but low-key really needing some alcohol in your system.

“You’ll need it for later, Y/N. Have it please?” he requests, raising his glass and waiting for you to clink them with. You give up, taking the glass and toasting it with Jihoon’s before having a sip. The way your sip lasted more than it was supposed to, seemed like you were quenching your thirst but with alcohol.

Well, fuck being sober at the love of your life’s wedding, I guess.

You hang with Jihoon for a bit more, before a cute Joshua is waltzing through the room, letting you know that it’s time to get ready for the ceremony. At this, Jihoon just nodded at you and hugged you off, saying that he’ll see you at the hall in a bit. The hug lingered for a while which was broke by Jisoo, coughing to subtly steal you away from everyone.

What was with him?

Well, he had a crush on you. Everyone else knew, except for you. Even Wonwoo knew. Shua wasn’t sure if his adoration has stayed a crush for so long, but he wasn’t ready to give up on you. Though a part of him is sad that you’re not the bride, he’s slightly happier to have a chance to woo you. (PS: everyone knew you were head over heels for Wonu, cheers to being the monarch of simp nation. JK, you were too obvious around him)

Hand wrapped around his arm, Shua leads you to your room, informing that Cheol will be over to pick you up in two hours or so. You slowly get into your dress, adoring how beautiful it looks before the makeup artist’s knocking at your door. You let them in and then sit down to get your makeup done, while you snack on carrots and stay on your phone. In no time, you’re dolled up real nice and right on time, Cheol enters. He smiles at you before engulfing you in a hug, careful not to ruin the art you are.

“You look lovely, Y/N. If I weren’t gay and married to Han, I’d walk down the aisle with you tonight.” he jokes, making you laugh.

“There we go, a smile was all that was missing” he says, taking your hands in his.

“How are you feeling, dove?” he asks, eyes scanning for any discomfort or sadness.

“I’m doing alright, Cheol. Thank you for checking up on me, always” you say, giving his hands a tight little squeeze.

“Glad that Jihoon made me have a good ol’ glass of Bombay Sapphire with ginger ale. I think I can survive the ceremony without breaking down and confessing my love to Wonu, while he’s getting married to Jiyeon” you blurt out, jokingly. There’s a moment of silence as Cheol gawks at what you said before you tell him that it was a joke and how they should get going before it gets late.

Guess you are late, as the person you love would be walking the aisle with his lover, who sadly isn’t you.

Before entering the hall, you go over to see the bride and groom. You head to Jiyeon’s room, heart hurting yet happy for her. Knocking on the door, you open it to see Jiyeon, pacing around the room in her wedding gown. She looks ethereal, and so ready to share her life with your best friend. As soon as she notices you, she runs towards you to hug, and tries to collect her breaths.

“Y/N, I can’t do this. I can’t. Can you marry Wonwoo instead?” she asks, voice laced with panic. It’s pathetic how you actually consider that for a minute. Laughing it off, you pull Jiyeon back, holding her hands in yours, eyes meeting hers while you muster up the courage to say –

“Hey Ji. You’ll be alright, okay? It’s not someone you don’t know, it’s just Wonu. Everything will be alright. Breathe for me, please?"

“Right, you’re right Y/N. It's Wonwoo, why’d I didn’t think of that? Anyways, thank you Y/N. Though you’ve always been his rock, you secretly managed to be mine too” she says, a wide smile plastered on her face.

“So, I'll see you on the aisle, yeah? All the best Ji, you’ve got this” you say, leaving before she replies. Your feelings were up your throat, waiting to be pushed out anytime if you hadn’t left the room. You do the same thing you told Jiyeon – breathe. You take a few deep breaths, fixing yourself as you head towards your best friend.

Best friend.

As you were about to knock, the door opens revealing an equally nervous yet, oh-so beautifully dressed Wonu. He’s pulling you inside, locking the door behind, not giving you time to process. You wait for him to say something, instead he just looks at you like he’s about to cry if you don’t hug him.

So, you do. You embrace him in your arms, for the last time as a bachelor and probably the last time as your love.

After staying in each other’s warmth for a while, he lets go, letting you take a good look at him.

“God damn, Wonu! You look so sharp, didn’t know you could stop being in your nerd element” you joke, winking at him. He laughs, before twirling lazily to give you a 360 of his carefully crafted tux.

“Ready, big guy?” you ask, searching for any hint of resistance in his eyes. He locks eyes with you, nodding slowly. Things have always been like this with him, words didn’t seem like a necessity. You were more than glad to not be talking more than that because honestly, you wouldn't be in one piece.

“Yeah. Yes, I’m ready Y/N. Don’t think I've ever been sure of anything, than this moment right now.” he says, lips curling into a soft smile. That smile of his was reserved, only you had seen it apart from Jiyeon, of course. You reciprocate the same, hugging him for the one last time and leaving the room with the feeling of your heart, suddenly weighing a ton.

As soon as you exit the room, you find Cheol pacing around in the hallway. At the sight of you standing outside Wonwoo’s room, Seungcheol is walking towards you.

“Hey dove, you alright?” he asks, so full of concern. You smile so much as a reply. So much that your cheeks hurt and tears slowly start to well up from within the depths of your fragile heart.

“I'm okay Seungcheol. Let's head to the hall before we're late, yeah?” you slur, trying to shake your tears off. He comprehends how sensitive you are and just nods at you, silently hooking your arm to his while the both of you walk towards to hall.

You realize, the pain you feel, is beyond anything your brain could fathom and mere words can describe how much it hurts.

The hall looks so elegant and everyone there look so beautiful, like dolls in a dollhouse. There are lots of orchids and tulips, as an ornament to the room, making it look so soft yet neat. You move towards your friends, praising how good they look in their tuxedoes and chit-chatting your way through the whole thing, trying your best not to think.

Weirdly, Joshua’s by you the whole time, stuck like gum. Not that you mind it or anything, it's actually really comfortable. Cheol had left your side to sit with Hannie and he had taken over. His subtle touches and the way he looks at you – it helps you feel so grounded and you're more than thankful for that.

Music starts playing, indicating the beginning of the ceremony as you see Wonwoo, gracefully walking down the aisle with a faint blush and a soft smile set on his gorgeous face. Your heart falters at the sight and it refuses to function further when he looks at you, sending you one of his reserved smiles. You reciprocate the same, hands slowly being taken into Jisoo’s. You're amazed at how helpful his touches have been, it's shocking.

Gazing at Wonu, everything fades out for you except for the love you have for him.

And in no time, Jiyeon’s walked in, vowing to love your best friend until the last of her breath and with everything she’s got. You can feel your heart clenching, and Joshua senses the same too, as your clammy hands squeeze his unconsciously.

The thing was, Shua didn't need words from you to understand either. He looks at you, his pretty eyes checking for any discomfort and when you smile back at him, he decides not to bother you further.

There's a sudden cheering of the crowd, making you turn your head towards the couple as you see them kissing.

Vows were said, promises were made and bonds were created.

It was too late for you to do anything. You feel the emotions rushing out of you as you excuse yourself to get away from there.

I need some air you say, to all your worried friends. So busy running away from the love of your life, you don't notice Joshua following you.

As soon as you get out, clutching your chest you slump down onto the sofa at the lobby as tears paint your face. The pain is so much that you find yourself trying hard to breathe while the emotions keep nagging at you and drowning you in the depth of the love you have for Wonwoo.

While trying to calm yourself down, you feel a hand on your shoulder, the radiating warmth grounding you for the Nth time this night. You look up thinking it's Jihoon, but it's not.

Hong Jisoo stands there, tears in his eyes but also looking so fondly at you.

As if you're a porcelain tea cup who’d break if looked at any harder.

You feel pathetic, but Joshua pulls you into a hug, letting you wet his shoulders to your heart’s content. Hearts suddenly seem to weigh a ton, the energy draining all while you try your best to catch the breath you never had in the first place.

He's gone. The love of your life is no longer yours.

Jeon Wonwoo, your best friend but also the person who mattered so much, like how the sun was to the moon.

For the coldness in him, he had found his summer. But left you to be nothing, than a petal of the harsh Winter, waiting to writhe away in utter grief.

_________________________________________

A/N: There's now an epilogue to this series, you can find it here!

[importantdestinydefendor]

Chapter 130 rambles...

Okay, I stayed up late for this chapter so many of my first thoughts are gone, lost in the world of dreams, BUT I still want to try to form any coherant sentences.

Which is hard this chapter becaue when i read it my mind just goes blank. No thoughts behind those eyes lol. Warning: a lot of pictures!

Anyway (spoilers ahead! Read at own risk)

Possessed Innocentis still giving me the creeps eww

NOOOOO not the soldiers that guarded Innocentis!

Like that we are still at the falling stage and have yet to hit the ground (this sounds horrible jesus)

THE REACTIONS OF THE THREE samesies

The panel with the Lusitanian unifrom (is it a unifrom???) just haning there ragged - oof that was a red herring right there! I was convinced that something awful will happen to Estelle...

Aaand we cut to this! The placment of the helmet! Their faces!

I will spare you the image of Innocentis and Amdragoras mangled bodies. @tired-reader-writer has it in their reaction post if anybody wants to see it.

The way Arslan reaches for the helmet! How we can't clearly tell if it is happiness (least likely - thats just not his character) or sadness (also not really likely in my opinion) or just pure shock (most likely)

okay, Elam calm thy self! Because if you say that now then it will most likely not happ-

aaaand I was right!

Eww get back, get back, get back! Do NOT come ANY closer!

The way Elam and Daryun immediatly get into action! Same, Alfarid, same!

~Andragoras, you are a hypocrate and delusional~ You were a shit king and your court was also full of shit. Being a king does not only require to be strong. Maybe you should have listend to Narsus instead of stroking your ego, ey?

Yes, Arslan! Tell him (again)! He will still not get it but tell him!

Oh eh, he-hello Tahamenay...

Oh, why is that momet so fucking tender? It seems he did actually love her...?

Aaand it is over... serves you right, Andycakes!

Love Tahamenays face here. The pure desperation and hatred...

I also like that he slowly excepts his demise and hugs her one last time before dying... Ugh I am a sucker for tragic romances (here one sided though) and the last hug... GAH

The faces of everyone! Alafrid is me through out this entire chapter for real!

Ugh Tahamenay! I have never fell more roller coaster feelings for this woman since her talk with Arslan! You are now free!

Estelle!!!!! No baby don't falter now!

Alafriiiid! My baby, my cutie! I will die for youuuu!!!! (I will put you through so much shit in my AU, I am sorry)

This panel... It makes me feel so dejected...

The citizens stopping Estelle... There is noboy at fault (except the racism against Jaswant. Not cool, guys!)

FARANGIIIIS! My queen to the resque!

The way my heart sank when Estelle opened the door and there was nobody...

And they were save afterall! Thank you, three boys whos names I forgot (sorry)

Oh the news are spreading like wildfire!

Love the different reaction shots! And the diferent levels of emotions! (also side note: Zandeh looks really good here...)

aaand here we go! Straight to hell... here I had hoped that we get at least a little breather...

FUCK NO! GET THAT THING AWAY FROM ISFANT AND KUBARD!

That is NOT Shapur, you two! RUN!

I had such a jumpscare. I was awake and tired at the same time.

No thoughts about my AU this time. Maybe some reaction scenes from Farzin and his army? Will defenitly wait until the kidnapping of Alafrid and Gieve here. Alfarid is way to important right now to just... yoink her from there.

OH! What if the do the same with Vahriz as they are doing with Shapur!? CHABIK REACTION SCENE OOOOOOH!

[thatwildnya]

Chapter 5: The Curtains are on Fire

Chitters

Wild: I had a lot of fun with this chapter. Ortho is one of my favorite characters and he doesn't get nearly as much content as his fellow students do so I kinda went all out. He's so cute and sweet, I wish I had a younger brother like him

Nya: y'all this one is a roller coaster have fun!

TW: blood (literally just mentioned), lilia's cooking, dead mom trope for the shroud bros oof

Shroud Brothers: Nightmare horse

You feel nothing as you stare with a blank expression. There are no emotions on your face. There are no thoughts in your brain. There is not a jumbled soup of emotions being cooked by your brain definitely not. Nothing.

Next to you sits Silver, eyes glued onto the bigger of the two traditional bodied centaurs standing before you.

They stare back at you. Or more accurately the younger did while his brother opted to hide in his hoodie.

You had gone out with Silver to buy him new pants for his human form. He had grown a lot in the past year and now was taller than you in his half form. But you still beat him in the bipedal department. Take that.

Now able to stay indefinitely in his half and half form he had begun practicing to do the same with bipedal. After an accidental flashing to the mailman he was in immediate need of something to cover his jimmies. No more towel skirts for him. Lilia was still laughing as they left.

While you were out your uncle had brought you more pets to care for. He’d dipped just before you returned this time, leaving them waiting in the entryway. You sense a pattern starting.

You take another look at the letter he left you. According to it the two were nightmares, a magical horse with flaming hair that could summon fire at will. He warned you the younger, Ortho, was at the age where he could start doing just that. He was a curious colt and must be kept away from flammable objects to the best of your ability. If he was using his power for any reason he must be supervised.

Lovely.

His older brother, Idia, had mastered his powers. According to reports he has been diagnosed with anxiety. If his levels of anxiety became too intense his instincts would kick in and let loose. Though this has not happened since mastering his skills it was something to keep in the back of your mind.

Lovely 2.0.

Ortho stepped away from his brother's side, coming closer. You didn’t notice, his steps were surprisingly quiet despite the hooves. You flinch feeling his hand curl around your free one. Not because he startled you, after living with Lilia and the twins for so long you are much harder to catch by surprise. They were freezing! These guys could control fire shouldn’t they have a warmer temperature like Malleus did?

Next to you Silver briefly tenses. He had grown quite attached to you and was always looking out for danger.

You turn your focus away from the letter to the colt before you. Ortho’s eyes were big and shining with innocent curiosity. He suddenly grins, a couple pointy teeth peeking out from his gums. You awkwardly return the guestrue, not sure what to say. All the other times the pets had introduced themselves or others to you. You were a bit awkward if you were being honest, a result of trying to not attract attention and avoiding contact when you could.

“Orpo!” he says, swinging your arm side to side. Was he trying to shake your hand and introduce himself? “Name Orpo!” heh, he was cute you wouldn’t lie. He points back at his older brother excitedly, “Nii-chan! Meet Nii-chan!” he tugs on your hand. You let him pull you closer to the older nightmare, a wave of relief washing through. Thank the seven he wasn’t as shy as his brother appeared to be. Silver follows close behind.

Idia was still hiding in his hoodie. You can hear faint mumbling from inside. The nightmare jumped when his brother patted his second chest, his tail making a crackling pop noise. Peeking out he looks down at the two of you, letting out a “hei!” when he sees you.

“Did you choose your rooms yet?” you ask, letting Ortho bring your and Idia’s hand together. He wanted the two of you to shake hands like he had with you earlier. Which was proving to be difficult. He brought together your left and Idia’s left, but you made it work by entwining your fingers with his. A tiny blush creeped across Idia’s face with his blue hair simultaneously doing the same at the ends. Ortho seemed to be satisfied, his own hands wrapped around yours rocking them back and forth in the air.

You repeat your question, this time getting an answer.

Idia shook his head, mumbling about this being a new map they shouldn’t just explore without a guide. Interesting way to put it.

Letting go of his (suddenly sweaty) hand (yeesh that got damp quick), you explain this place used to be a dorm so they would definitely be able to get their own room each. Ortho insisted on holding both your and his brother’s hand for the tour. It was adorable, if you tried to pull away he got a little pouty and tightened his grip. You are no longer mad your uncle brought a fire wielding baby into the house.

As you lead them around, you can hear an all too well known skittering hard floor scratching steppies following behind. A certain trio was unsurprisingly curious about the newcomers.

You turn around to make a shooing motion with your free hand after ascending the stairs to the second floor. Idia had also noticed and was becoming anxious with their tailing. Whenever they stopped he started nervously pawing at the floor. Your floors were very old and needed to be replaced. Even if your uncle had given you a credit card, he’d said only to use it for the essentials. Apparently replacing the floorboards that could break without a moment's notice didn’t count.

Unfortunately for you, the boys thought you were telling them to come closer. They bounded over, excited to interact with the newbies. Silver attempted to block and grab them with no success.

Ortho was delighted, he bent down so his face was closer. Jack began sniffing his face, his tail a tornado of white. Deuce made an excited chittering sound, standing on his back legs and putting his front legs atop Jack’s head to get close. Sebek also used Jack as a support, his smaller legs using the wolf pup’s back. Both of the scaly centaurs' tails thumped against the floor. You watched them scramble over each other, trying to be the closest to the colt. Meanwhile Silver was trying to get them to settle down. Once again he was unsuccessful.

Noticing the lack of scraping you turn to check on Idia. The nightmare was staring as the kids interacted, eyes big and unblinking. The anxiety was still there, but his body language hinted at slight hostility with how tense he was. You reach over and pat his side, causing him to startle with another “hei!” as he sidestepped away. Out of the corner of your eye you see Silver straighten up ready to act if necessary.

“They’re good kids, if they harm him it’s by mistake. Relax, there hasn’t been a single fight. And that’s saying something with all the big personalities here.” you reassure, stepping closer and resting a hand on his side. He flinches at your touch, his muscles tensing more but stays in place.

Standing on tiptoes, you start to scratch the spine of the horse half. Everyone absolutely loved when you did this and would relax under your nails. You assumed the same applied and well lookie here! His muscles are untensing and fingers unclutching. 

As Idia starts to calm he moves closer without thinking. You smile, upping the ante and using your other hand to scratch what you could reach of the human spine. A happy nicker comes out of him as you give him some love.

~~~~~~

In the end the brothers chose a pair of rooms that had a broken wall between them. They didn’t want to be separated and convinced you to let them merge the rooms into one. You ask Silver to find Malleus, intending to ask him to use his magic to make get rid of the wall that had seen better days and combine some beds together for them.

When inquired about the reason for the dragon Idia said the bed merging wouldn’t be necessary. He informed you that equine centaurs like them needed special beds due to health problems that would occur later if they slept in certain ways too often. Thankfully they already had some of their own belongings from the ranch they’d been living at previously. They were to be delivered the coming weekend, in the meantime he could sleep standing up and only Ortho would need a bed since he was still young.

Upon hearing what the nightmare said the trio asked if Ortho could sleep with them tonight and began fighting over who got to sleep next to him. You hadn’t even said yes yet.

They were the only ones without rooms of their own, as they were too young to be left without supervision for long periods of time. Your master solution? Let them sleep with you. The bed was far too big in the first place. You didn’t like how empty it felt when you were in it all by your lonesome.

Idia instantly shoots down the idea, refusing to let Ortho out of his sight during the night. He was practically a baby still, Idia needed to be close at all times! Though it seemed like this was more for his sake than his brothers.

In response the boys ganged up on the overprotective brother, whining to let him. Even Ortho joined in. It was kinda funny watching a big animal being flustered by much smaller ones.

You watched on with a smile, forgetting the letter in your pocket. Not the best thing to let slip your mind. Everything was fine until Deuce lost his patience and nipped at Idia’s ankle.

Idia reacted instinctively, kicking Deuce away with a frightened whinny and retreating backwards with a crackling mane and tail. Deuce hit the wall with a thud! followed by loud yelp. Sensing his brother’s fear, Ortho also became frightened and instinctively switched into his animal form. The colt’s eyes went wild and he began pacing around, nearly stepping on the smaller pets. His own hair began to pop and crackle.

Jack and Sebek got angry seeing their friend harmed. Turning into their animal forms, Jack begins running between Idia’s legs spooking him further. Meanwhile Sebek is snapping at his hooves and ankles. Now there is another fire hazard horse prancing around your hall.

You’re panicking in the midst of the commotion, shouting for everyone to calm everyone down while simultaneously trying to get Deuce to give you a straight answer. The poor thing was crying, holding his arm. You’re unsure if you should or shouldn’t touch his arm. Would that make it worse?

A snarling gust of wind flying overhead catches your attention. Of all the times you needed to be found, this was one of the shortest.

You turn to be greeted with the view of a conclusion jumping dragon Malleus pinning a now shrieking horse Idia to the floor. Ortho had a mouthful of his hair and was desperately trying to pull him off. Jack was giving Ortho’s tail the same treatment. Sebek has his jaws tight around Idia’s leg as he is jerked in every direction.

You start yelling at Malleus to get off. If he hears you he doesn’t show. He takes no notice of the pulls on his hair or screaming of his master. His focus is solely on the prey underneath his claws starting to break its skin. 

Why are they ignoring you? There’s blood on the floor. You’ve been working so hard to make sure they’re comfortable, the least they could do is listen! Idia has summoned a fireball to hit Malleus. It’s loud. A vase has been smashed. Who should you call for Deuce’s injury? The curtains are on fire. Do the smoke alarms work? Ortho has kicked Jack off his tail. Is that just Idia’s blood? Do you even have smoke alarms?  It’s too loud. Does your uncle know anything about treating injuries? Jack has gotten a hold of Ortho’s tail again. Your eyes are getting glossy. You can’t think. Your vision is blurry. You don’t know what to do. It’s too. Fucking. LOUD.

A loud shriek suddenly resounds through the air. Everyone freezes in place, stunned by the sudden ringing in their ears. Lilia stands at the end of the hall in his largest form. Under him was a worried, somewhat frightened fox Silver. Peeking from the corner of the stairs are your sea dwelling pets, hair soaked and barely transformed in their human forms.

Everyone seems to shrink as Lilia walks towards them, his gaze dominating them into submission. Even Malleus looked spooked, trying to make himself appear smaller than he was.

With a hiss he tells Malleus to get off and for the other two to let go of the nightmares. They wordlessly obey, putting as much distance between them as possible with the space there was.

Idia gets off his side but doesn’t stand. His chest is heaving and eyes still big as saucers. Ortho stands next to him, licking a cut on his shoulder. He tries to soothe his terrified brother with quiet whinnies and gentle nuzzles.

Lilia lets out a growl, staring a moment longer before bending down to assess Deuce. Finding the younger to only be bruised his attention switches to you. But his son has already taken on that role.

Silver has taken on his centaur form and was cradling your head in his chest. Other than a quick “did you get hurt?” he had said nothing. Simply tracing shapes on your back. But that was enough for you. You just needed some quiet.

As you were taken care of Lilia busied himself with the others instead, silently entrusting you to Silver. A minute later he was satisfied.

“Now then,” he stands as tall as the ceiling allows. Arms crossed, he puts a wing over his son and you, “care to share what happened?”

~~~~~~

As a punishment you (see; Lilia) made Malleus in charge of the troublesome trio until the weekend rolled around. This meant the boys would be staying in his room and couldn’t sleep with you. And boy oh boy were they not happy.

It would be the first time they would be sleeping someplace other than your bed. They begged you not to kick them out, saying they were sorry and promising they wouldn’t do it again. But you (again, see; Lilia) stand your ground, this would serve as a good lesson.

Malleus shared the same emotions towards the punishment. It was his turn to sleep in the bed with you this week. Next week was the twins and Azul’s turn, and after that was Lilia’s turn. Silver was still small enough in his fox form that he could squeeze in no matter whose turn it was so he joined on and off, sometimes wanting to stay in his own bed instead.

As an apology for this mess of a first day you invited the new residents to sleep in your room. Ortho was happy, excited to sleep in a bed as big as yours. Idia said since it would only be a few days there wouldn’t be any health concerns to worry about.

Thankfully by dinner Ortho had seemingly forgotten the whole shebang. He was bouncing around under the watchful eye of Lilia behind you while Idia taught you how to make his specially prescribed milk formula. Ortho had some health complications and needed a special diet until further notice.

On the topic of munchies, it was past 7 when you finally got the four naughties to eat dinner. Or at least three of them. All four were too emotional to eat during dinner. The younger three ate after Lilia suggested he make them something himself.

If they weren’t so young you wouldn’t have pushed them so much. But you did not want to be awoken in the middle of the night because they were hungry after this stressful hell of a day.

Note: weaponize the bat’s cooking

Malleus, however, outright refused. He Isolated himself on the roof, sulking up there until it was time for the boys to sleep.

Lilia said not to worry about him or the youngers. Malleus had done the same when he was young and pouting, it was best to leave him alone when he wanted to be. And it was common for emotional centaurs to not have an appetite, especially when said were negative.

Now back to the brothers.

It is 8:30 and time for Ortho’s before bed bottle. And all the excitement from today had caught up to Ortho. He was falling asleep as his brother fed him, barely able to keep his eyes open. Even choked a few times from dozing off.

Silver had decided to join you today. He was still worried about you after the fight earlier and wanted to stay close. In fact he hadn’t left your side once since the whole fiasco. At least Idia didn’t mind him, they actually seemed to get along well.

Idia surprises you when Ortho finishes, putting his arms under his brother's belly and hoisting him into the air to carry him to the bed. How was he strong enough to carry him? His arms looked like twigs.

You gather up the empty dishes to put them on your dresser. They can be washed in the morning. Or stay there and collect dust and ants for a week. Fate will decide.

“Don’t forget to take those down in the morning less you want to room with ants again~” you just give the bat a thumbs up with a mumbled “yeah yeah”.

Idia stands next to the bed, a blanket thrown over his body. He hadn’t exchanged his hoodie for a different one. Hopefully he had more.

You had said he could sleep with the two of you but he declined, saying he isn’t ready to start a level like that yet. The gaming lingo would take some time getting used to.

Ortho had claimed one of your bigger pillows and was snoozing away, nickering in his sleep. You cover him with a blanket, a gentle smile finding its way to your face when you push a strand of his blue flaming mane off his face. As you get comfy Silver squeezes between your arms in his fox form for snuggles.

Above you Lilia starts to sing. You didn’t know what language, but it seemed oddly familiar.

You close your eyes, succumbing to his lullabies of a dreamless slumber.

~~~*~~~

Idia watches you being oh so gentle with his brother and the fox centaur, glad to see the two of you were getting along.

While drifting off to sleep he thinks about the ranch they had been raised on before Crowley had come along. The trainers would beat the pets if they misbehaved or tried to stand up for themselves. They were treated like an item instead of living beings. Humans would stare at him like he was nothing but a rare collectible. He remembered how the owners of the breeding program had raged because he was too anxious to perform in dressage competitions as his kind were expected to. How they’d planned to use him as nothing more than a breeding slave.

And he remembered how they’d thrown his mother’s body into the back of a truck on route to a glue factory like she was useless garbage, grumbling about how much money had been wasted on her to only give birth to a half dead useless foal.

He looks at you again. Ortho had snuggled closer to you, his head now using your arm as a pillow. Your other arm was draped over him, securing him in a gentle hug with the fox in the middle.

Idia watches you for a bit longer before giving into Lilia’s songs of sleep himself, hopeful you were much kinder than all the other humans he’s met.

[wasyago]

Since uve almost finished with catching up, what’s been ur favorite episode?

(as horrible and tramatic as it was ep 97 is my favorite along with 91 just for the goofs)

oof that's a tough question, sinve I've been binge watching - it all just blurs together, but uhmm.... can't pick one, so here's a couple

ep 15 - definitely, 100% broke my heart but it was so damn good

ep 25 - one of the most epic fights, plus the "hole in your heart". this song is such a banger and it makes me cry when all three sing together...

ep 52 - the block, hell yeah babyyyy. the flesh room and the desert, both such great moments

ep 58 - just everyone hanging out and having fun and talking <3333 such a chill happy episode

the episode in which chip and jay meet, it doesn't have a number but i love it a whole lot anyway

ep 79 - them with goobleck in a funky temple, just going through rooms and missing gill, very sad. and also that gillion trial at the end of the episode

ep 86 - a goddamn 3 hour episode. the entirety of jazz pirates, they're so dear to me. lots of soft sad moments and the epic anime fight, it has it all....

ep 98 - a new addition!! an emotional roller-coaster but its only going down! lovely!

and also all the guest episodes/arcs because they always have such cool scenery and environments and the guests are fun

[mysticinsightstarot]

heyyy how are u? So i saw that im on the free tarot game! (Tysmm)

My question is if GA (his first letter of his first name and the second letter of his second name) and me are going to be something? Like who he sees me and his feelings

Thank u❤️🙏🏻

💖✨ Will You & GA Be a Thing? ✨💖

Hey beautiful souls, buckle up for a wild tarot ride full of cosmic chaos, deep emotions, and spicy potential! 😍🔮 Let’s unravel the mysteries of your connection with GA!

1. Current Energy Between You Two

The Devil, The Moon, The World Oof, talk about intense! 🔥🌓 The Devil hints at undeniable attraction, a magnetic pull that you both probably can’t ignore—think obsessive thoughts or that late-night overthinking spiral. The Moon suggests confusion, hidden feelings, and uncertainty clouding the way. 🌌 Yet, The World wraps it up by saying there’s potential for fulfillment if you both can rise above the shadows and fears. It’s like a karmic roller coaster that could come full circle. 🎢💫

2. GA’s Current Feelings for You

8 of Cups, Queen of Cups, Hierophant GA’s energy is a mystery wrapped in complexity. 😶‍🌫️💔 The 8 of Cups shows they’re trying to walk away from something emotionally heavy, maybe past wounds or something unresolved. But wait—the Queen of Cups says they feel deeply for you, with compassion and care. 🥹✨ The Hierophant speaks of tradition, meaning GA might crave commitment but are dealing with inner struggles first. You’re touching their heart, but they need to find themselves before diving in.

3. Your Feelings for GA

High Priestess Ooh, secretive, are we? 😉🌙 The High Priestess tells me you’re keeping your cards close to your chest, maybe trusting your intuition and vibing on a soul level. This is a deep, spiritual attraction, like you know there’s something more but don’t want to spill all the tea just yet. 🍵✨

4. Obstacles in the Connection

Ace of Pentacles, Page of Swords, Queen of Wands, Knight of Cups, 2 of Wands Holy obstacles, Batman! 😵‍💫 The Ace of Pentacles reveals issues around stability—could be financial, practical, or even timing. Meanwhile, the Page of Swords warns of immaturity or gossip, someone snooping or talking without thinking. 🤔 The Queen of Wands? She’s bringing passion, but maybe too much drama! The Knight of Cups shows romantic dreams, but watch out for inconsistencies. The 2 of Wands? There’s distance, maybe literal or metaphorical, making things tough. Decisions, decisions! 🗺️💭

5. What Attracts GA to You

2 of Cups, Page of Cups, Chariot Heart eyes alert! 🥺❤️ The 2 of Cups says GA feels a soulmate-like connection, a bond that’s hard to ignore. The Page of Cups makes them adore your sweet, dreamy side, and The Chariot means you bring out their desire to chase, to go after what they want. You inspire them to take action—they’re so into you, it’s like a love song stuck in their head. 🎶🚗💕

6. What Makes GA Hesitate

6 of Cups, 5 of Swords, 8 of Swords, 7 of Wands Oof, here’s the tea! 🍵🥀 The 6 of Cups brings past memories—GA might still be dealing with a nostalgic longing or an ex-situation. The 5 of Swords is all about conflict and feeling defeated. Add in the 8 of Swords, and they’re stuck in their own mind, paralyzed by fear or self-doubt. And the 7 of Wands? That’s defensiveness, feeling like they have to fight off external pressures. It’s a battlefield in their head, for real. 🥺🪖

7. Advice for You

10 of Wands, 9 of Wands Whoa, you’re carrying a lot of emotional baggage, my love. 😩💼 The 10 of Wands says you’ve been shouldering too many responsibilities or expectations. The 9 of Wands? It’s the wounded warrior, telling you to hold on but set some boundaries. Protect your energy, but don’t give up if this feels right. Healing and patience will be your BFFs. 💪✨

8. Potential Outcome

8 of Pentacles, 8 of Wands, The Star, Strength Triple 8s for abundance and change! 🔥💸 The 8 of Pentacles says progress is possible if you’re willing to put in the work. The 8 of Wands brings a rush of communication or sudden developments. And The Star? It promises hope, healing, and divine timing—wish upon that shooting star, babe! 🌠 Finally, Strength is all about taming inner demons and growing stronger together. If you both stay resilient, this connection can be beautifully transformative. 🦁🌟

Bottom of the Deck: The Magician

Manifestation mode ON! 🌟✨ The Magician says you have all the tools to make magic happen in this relationship. Focus on what you truly desire, and speak it into existence! You’re both more powerful than you realize. 😇💬

📝 Feedback means everything, babes! 💌 Tag my blog with your thoughts and be sure to reblog my pinned post with a 💎 to officially claim your reading. Trust me, it’s essential if you want to keep this good energy flowing and make more magic together! ✨💖

[thelargefrye]

SMALLS DOES A WRITING GAME

tagged by @invuwrld

recommend 5 or more of your own works that you would rec to someone asking what they should read first & explain a little bit about the work. these can be the most popular, the ones you think are underrated, or your own favorites! then tag five other writers!

BLUE CHRISTMAS … exile her au (18+)

my first thing i wrote in two years, so this is precious to me. also the beginning of my exile her au which is probably my pride and joy. i wrote this in like two days, i think. honestly just love this au and everyone should give it a chance in my opinion lol.

SONG OF FOURTEEN YEARS … atla au

i’ve had this au planned and in the drafts for like two years and now i’m FINALLY doing it. i absolutely love avatar the last airbender and so excited to write this au and take EVERYONE on a possible emotional roller coaster.

LOVE & SMOKE … rockstar au

first thing i wrote for rocker!ateez and even though it’s short, it’s still sweet. i definitely need to write more for rocker!ateez. also, i feel like a lot of rocker!ateez stuff is very angsty and so i’m glad i wrote this because it just showcases seonghwa and y/n’s relationship well i think.

FIRST LOVE … dragon au (18+)

absolutely love dragon!ateez and witch!y/n. so glad i wrote this to capture the relationship between wooyoung and y/n and them mating for the first time. also had to get that hurt / comfort in there. really proud of it.

UGLY DRAGON … dragon au (18+)

oof i also love this because i love making everyone suffer with hongjoong and y/n’s relationship. i promise they will have a happy ending but not yet! this is definitely popular among everyone on the blog and i’m happy because i remember being self conscious when writing it lol.

HUSBAND MONTAGE … dad au

remake of the mr. housedad au! really glad i did it because i know i can do so much with each member and their y/n. also had this planned for like two years and even have this timeline of when each member met their y/n, got married, had their kids, and even if they broke up and when they got back together. love this au. love it, love it, love it.

going to tag @flowerboykun @sanjoongie @songmingisthighs @atiny-piratequeen @kitten4sannie (no pressure, just figure everyone deserves the chance to brag about themselves lol!)

[ikemenomegas]

I love love the character of the alpha in jjk. their relationship with gojo is super complex and the alpha's character itself is super complicated itself and thats why i love them sm. you mentioned before that they keep their silence when things get bad and i got reminded of my own experiences as the youngest child in a family where i had to shut up about my own sufferings just to keep the peace in the family and sooner or later, the person will blow up and thats what makes this character so interesting because you see how theyre keeping themselves together but we can also read their thoughts and we know that they are not okay and you're just waiting for the moment they'd go apeshit. And i also like how their relationship with gojo is the way it is because they both are shamans before they are two human beings deeply in love.

ANYWAYS BACK TO BEING IGNORANT OF CANON

Nobara sending a message to gojo asking why tf didnt he turn up for class to which gojo replies with a picture of of himself and his alpha beside him in disneyland wearing mickey mouse merch and telling her he's on a busy and dangerous mission

the alpha and nanami talking and purposely ignoring gojo annoying them

Thank you anon! It's been super fun putting together a layered character who suits this world but also a lot of work haha.

Oof, I'm the eldest daughter (and eldest child) in my family and I think this is something the eldest and the youngest often shake hands on, is that you frequently have to put aside your own suffering in order to be responsible or keep the peace. And this emotional pressure cooker eventually does blow up, but because it's everything, and when it goes on long enough there's nowhere to aim those feelings, it means that complicated feelings go everywhere, there's no single person or situation at fault so it feels like it's everything going wrong. One thing that's also a curse of the youngest is probably seeing every interaction between the rest of your family, on top of how the you are feeling, and being incredibly disturbed by how those interactions play out and are affected by personal bias and selfishness.

I think we forget a lot that even though there's only two kids, Megumi is the youngest and part of his "I only want to be responsible for my people, not the rest of the world" comes from that place of seeing how everyone around him takes on so much responsibility and justification it makes them crazy and his resentment at the world for doing that to them.

But yes!! Back to the fun happy times hahaha:

Oh my gosh, can you imagine how many curses there would be in a place like theme park where emotions and desires and disappointments are running high??? There probably are curses lurking around and they are at work but the "busy and dangerous" part is Gojo trying to get alpha to go on all of the roller-coasters together.

If Nobara complains loud and long enough, the whole first year class might "end up with" a surprise extra day off and oh look, Megumi just happens to have a set of tickets lol. Satoru is a troll, but even he would agree with getting the kids out to a theme park at some point - however the tickets aren't from him, the tickets are alpha who felt bad that Satoru was making fun of her all the time XD. Except Satoru makes them clean up some curses while they're in the area so it's not much of a vacation...

Alpha and Nanami, their cute kouhai, trying to read a map or something while Satoru has shown up to check on them and make a ruckus is killing me haha. Eventually Nanami's hinting "please deal with that" glances get to be too much and you have to buy Satoru a snack to shut him up for a minute and remind him he's cared for.

[spookyserenades]

I cant- author how could you, I have to stop reading in between the chapters bc there’s just so much fluff mixed with steamy ness mixed with sadness mixed with wholesomeness. Every time I read a chapter I’m on a roller coaster and I don’t know how to handle everything sksjebrdisk. TEASE! They’re all teases and the fact that they all know what their doing like fr she’s not gonna make it to the end of the year, bet! No cause joon is literally jsut a big goof ball, menacing wolf my ass- deep inside he’s jsut a nerdy hunk of beef jerky. No ngl that hobi scene got me felling like DAMN, ouchie but also steamy oof oof oof. No like I felt that bite fr, him and jk fr. I thoguht jimin scent scene would be tamer and it was in a sense, but like you still feel the steamy ness when you read it like it’s so him soft and gentle manly omg your writing is jsut so good. Like all my friends are writers, I’m not really one but I showed them your fic and they were so impressed for realz, also many of them are all addicted to trouvallie and it’s characters now lol. Frankly I don’t understand all the work that goes into writing I don’t write that often unless it’s an assignment or smth but my friends love your writing, [they mainly read on ao3, not tumble tho so they don’t got accounts…. Yet ;)] Even tho I don’t understand what writers go thru, I truly apprêtâtes all the work you put into this series, you give us a heavy spicy chapter every month, I mean 20k is a lot so ty. Honestly personally believe you should have more likes. Also I know this is already really long, but I tend to smths forget their physical features, like eye color and stuff like I know Jin and joon have like amber ish and then jimin has yellow but do the rest have brown? I feel like yoongi had green but I may be mixing it up with another fic. Also, do their ages match this year or last year since you’ve been writing this since last year? Ok thanks that’s enough for now, have a good week!

FDSAFH This update was a bit of an emotional rollercoaster, huh!! I'm really excited that I was able to stir up all those emotions in you, though. You're sooo right they're ALL a bunch of teases, MC must be going THROUGH it, I mean seriously! 👹

Ugh Joonie... he really has that 'big bad wolf' vibe that masks a certain sweetness or innocence within him. Nerdy beef jerky that's SUCH a good way to describe him I'm crying!! And Hoseok PLS I just... needed his scenting scene to be as sexy as he is. As for Jimin, that's the exact vibe you described I was going for-- gentle, manly and steamy ahhh!! 🛐

Omg also... thank you so much for being so sweet about my writing! I'm blushing so hard 😭🥺... thank you for showing my story to your friends, that means so much to me, and please tell them thank you for their kind words as well for me! I'm planning on cross posting Trovaille on AO3 soon additionally, so I'll make sure to post an announcement for that if your friends are more comfortable reading on that platform! I love planning and writing these chapters every month, and making them nice and lengthy as well... as for likes, I'm very happy with my interactions at the moment! I have sweet, kind, and clever readers, and I believe that those who are meant to find Trouvaille always will. 🥰💓💜

So for physical features of each hybrid! I think it'll be helpful for me to list them here for you and anyone else who has forgotten or didn't catch it before! Their ages match up to their ages as of August 2022- so Jeongguk will be turning 25 in the next chapter, and so forth. Here are their eye/hair colors:

Seokjin: Sunset-like orange eyes, blue black curly/wavy hair

Yoongi: Green/gold hazel eyes, black hair

Hoseok: Cocoa brown eyes with caramel/gold flecks, red/brown mahogany wavy hair

Namjoon: Amber (like orangey, dark honey) eyes, silver grey hair

Jimin: Yellow (like butterscotch) eyes, honey blonde hair

Taehyung: Red (carmine) brown eyes, curly black hair

Jeongguk: Black eyes, mixed chestnut brown hair

I tried my best to give each of the boys similar colored eyes to what kind of hybrid they are-- for example, black jaguars typically have those copper-penny eyes, and elks have deep black eyes. To give them all a bit of distinction, as well! 💜

Hope you're doing well, love, and thank you for sending me this wonderful message! 💓🥰

[autistic-fandom-trash]

rating tma entities based on how likely i would be to willingly become an avatar of them

The Buried: 1/10 i hate the idea of being trapped/suffocated and i also hate capitalism. 1 point for excellent taste in ambient music tho

The Corruption: 3/10 it would be absolute hell for my sensory issues and i want it far away from me at all times. 3 points for emotional appeal... like damn maybe i do want to be entirely consumed by what needs my protection and therefore will always have it

The Dark: 6/10 its kinda basic but being able to hide in the shadows and representing the fear of the unknown is an absolute vibe

The Desolation: 10/10 chaotic lesbians lets go!! also i am forever indebted to agnes montigue bc she killed the web avatar who brought up my school trauma

The End: 4/10 im pretty existential sometimes but like not in a depressing way. ive been suicidal in the past (not anymore dw) and i feel like im pretty comfortable w/ the idea of death all things considered. there is also a person from my past i have dreamed about killing but we dont have time to unpack all of that

The Eye: 5/10 i love learning new things and im not scared of being judged. however i dont rly like the idea of anyone knowing abt my intrusive thoughts bc its just uncomfortable

The Flesh: 3/10 its all pretty yikes but ig shapeshifting could be fun

The Hunt: 4/10 tbh im kinda torn on this one. on one hand, it has to do with law enforcement (ew). on the other hand, the wilderness creature aspect is an absolute vibe. maybe id consider it if it let me be a feral catgirl instead of a werewolf

The Lonely: 3/10 its depressing as shitfuck and also a lying bitch. 3 points for the share amount of writing i would get done. just nonstop fic updates

The Slaughter: 7/10 to quote the jurgen leitner rant im just mad bc i am angy

The Spiral: 3/10 i hate it when ppl dont take me seriously abt my mental health issues but itd be kinda fun to mess w/ ppl ig

The Stranger: 8/10 again!! the unknown!! and being unapologetically weird!! an absolute vibe!!

The Vast: 9/10 its just... beautiful. everywhere you look. the bright blue of the sky silver clouds gray storms flashing lightning starry nights infinite shining galaxies the wind in your hair the thrill of a roller-coaster. humans may be small and unimportant in the universe but the universe is lovely and we get to experience it. there is so much to love we will never run out do you get it

The Web: 0/10 it can eat shit and die!! i can handle spiders but keep mind control the FUCK away from me

The Extinction: 3/10 i like computers and i dont rly fear change but the climate crisis is... oof

[bradshawburner]

I had a lot of feelings and big emotions reading this one! The pain! The pining! The miscommunication of it all! Their dynamics were so lovely and this was so well written!

More below!

“Just uh, was just thinking about you.”-what I wouldn’t GIVE

You’d opened the door to a Bradley with flushed cheeks and a glint in his eye, leaning against the railing outside your apartment. — LORD HAVE MERCY I WOULDN’T SURVIVE 

The first time Bradley had ever slid his cock into you, you knew you’d never be the same, that you’d never be able to go back.— it would have you tasting sound and hearing colors, blesssss

You’re not trying to break your own heart more than you already are.- OOF

Bradley warm around you and inside you, him making you feel complete in a way you hadn’t known you weren’t whole before. — oh this is so lovely it HURTS

Had to run for work. Thanks for having me over. A messy heart and a hastily scrawled Bradley closing off the message. - A LITTLE NOTE FROM BRADLEY WITH A LITTLE HEART?! Like what else needs to be said?!! She’s got him doodling hearts, like it’s loveeeee

For once, he doesn’t trip or stub his toe on anything, and it somehow heightens the intensity.— because he has her place memorizeeeeddddd. That boy has been paying attention!

What does send a terrible feeling trickling down your throat and into your stomach is the post-it, all four square inches covered in sloppy hearts.— this sweet, lovely, beautiful idiot! He’s so gone for her, but she’s not a mind reader! Oh it hurts so good

Bradley always seems to take a special sort of pleasure from fucking you in his shirt, and you selfishly want to keep that bargaining chip, to have something that tethers him to you. — oh but he likes more than just her in his shirt! He’s leaving hearts all over the place like confetti!

“Well, have you ever had sex with yourself? It’s tough out here–give a guy a break.”- your honor I love him

Bradley is a perfectionist at heart, an overachiever.- 1% BABYYYYY

He responds by whispering your name back to you, the same tone undercutting the way he says it, “That doesn’t matter, I’m here now.”- the way my stomach dropped 😭

And you’re weak for him. You should’ve known from the start that you wouldn’t be able to resist him. You can’t even now, even when you’re only getting him in pieces.— oh this poor girl would rather hurt herself than give him up, happily unhappy with any crumb 🥲

It’s not exactly your bravest moment to be hiding slightly behind Phoenix so he can’t see you (if you can’t see him, he can’t see you, right?) while she stares at you with an endlessly amused expression in her eyes. She doesn’t move to expose you, though.— she’s such a real one for this! I just know she’s been giving Bradley so much shit for being messy! #womensupportingwomen

You wonder for a moment if he’s been talking to her about all this, but again, is there even anything to talk about?— who gave you permission to hurt me??!!

“I tried to tell you so many times how I felt, I left you all those post-it notes, god, I thought you were seeing them and just didn’t feel the same.”— MY SWEET BABY I KNEW IT, HES SO PRETTY AND SO DUMB AND IM SO SOFT FOR HIM

 “I meant every heart, every I love you, from the very first one I left.”— 😭💖😭

I adored the emotional roller coaster! xx @sometimesanalice​

new rules

summary: "Don’t pick up the phone, he’s only calling because he’s drunk and alone. Don’t let him in, you’ll have to kick him out again. Don’t be his friend, you know he’s going to wake up in your bed in the morning. If you’re under him, you’re sure as hell not getting over him."  rating: explicit (18+ mdni) pairing: bradley 'rooster' bradshaw x f!reader word count: 8.5k (this got away from me sorry y'all) warnings: angst (lack of communication!), idiots pining, PiV (unprotected), oral (f receiving), hangman x phoenix (blink and u will miss it), no use of y/n.  notes: thank you to @waklman for letting me bounce ideas off you! im very nervous abt this one, i feel like its dif from my other stuff so pls pls let me know what u think! my other works are here

Friends with benefits is maybe an inaccurate way to describe what’s going on between you and Bradley. Friends? Sure, since he asked you if you were using that bench at the beach and then he’d introduced himself. With benefits? You’re not sure if they really could be classified that way.

Bradley’s almost always a perfect gentleman. 

He doesn’t ignore you in the daylight, but the two of you never talk about the way he finds himself in your bed most nights rather than not, drunk or sober. 

It had started one night when you’d turned down an invitation to go to the Hard Deck, instead choosing to do a night of self care. You’d spent too long doing your eyebrows and managed to get a sheet mask to fully cover your face for once. You lost count of how much time you spent in the shower as an indulgence, and threw on the comfiest clothing you owned. Then, you sat yourself down in front of your TV to numb your mind with some perfectly trashy reality television.

Around 11:30, your phone had rang. Picking it up and squinting at the brightness, you saw Bradley’s face grinning back at you, the picture from one of your many beach days since you’d met. 

Despite your best instincts you’d picked up. What if he was stranded? What if something had happened? You’d steeled yourself for the worst. 

Instead, Bradley had just opened with a simple, “Hey.”

“Bradley? Is everything okay?” You could hear the noise of the Hard Deck in the background, but it had been yelling and there weren’t any sirens. 

“Yeah,” His sigh had come over extra loud through the speakers, “Just uh, was just thinking about you.”

“Okay,” What the hell? You remember mouthing the words to yourself as someone on screen had thrown a drink in someone else’s face. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

He hadn’t responded to your question, instead he’d just said, “Are you at your apartment?”

“Yeah, I’m here. Bradley is everything–”

“I’ll see you soon.” And with that, he’d hung up with a definitive click. 

You’d stared at the dimming screen of your phone for probably almost five minutes. Surely he couldn’t have been that drunk–god, was he planning on driving? Calling him during that was probably a bad idea.

Great, leave it to Bradley to stress you the fuck out on a Friday evening when you’d been aiming for peace. You’d tried to refocus on your show, but you weren’t even paying attention to the words. 

No more than five minutes later, there had been a knock at your door. You’d stood slowly, not sure that this was actually happening. 

You’d opened the door to a Bradley with flushed cheeks and a glint in his eye, leaning against the railing outside your apartment. It was only after a moment of silence that you realized you were wearing an old Navy shirt of his, loaned to you at the beach a few weeks ago. You could feel the way his eyes started at your legs and dragged up your frame, taking everything in.

“Bradley?”

He’d pushed off the railing and backed you into your apartment, letting the door swing shut behind the two of you. You’d backed into the living room til your back hit a wall, your heart in your throat. You couldn’t look away from him, not with the way he’d been crowding into your space, leaning into you.

“Hi, sweetheart.” His voice was a tone he’d never used on you before, and you remember the way your heart had hammered in your chest. 

He’d been so warm and so close, setting all of your nerve endings on fire. It wasn’t that you hadn’t realized that Bradley was attractive–the man’s whole job was to stay in shape and be clean cut. He was beautiful. But you’d kept that to yourself, afraid of crossing that line, afraid that you’d ruin something that was turning out to be one of the strongest friendships you’d had in years. 

You still feel that fear, despite all the lines that have been crossed since that moment.

The way he’d kissed you had wiped every thought from your head. His hands had slid up your thighs to grip at your waist under his shirt hanging loosely on you. His mouth had moved smoothly against yours, making you sigh and wrap your arms around his shoulders. 

By the time the two of you had made your way into your bedroom, he’d lost every piece of clothing but his briefs and his dog tags. They’d dug into your sternum as you’d pressed yourself against him, the cool metal warming quickly between the two of you. 

The way your blood had been rushing in your ears from adrenaline had drowned out the way he’d murmured to himself as he’d kissed down your body. He never did pull his shirt off you. He’d simply maintained his grip on your hips, lifting your thighs over his shoulders as he’d pulled your panties down and licked desperately into you.

Your hands had gone to his hair out of reflex. He had been rocking you steadily and you think you’ll always remember how you felt when you’d realized it was because he was grinding his hips against the bedframe, so turned on from getting his mouth on you. 

He’d eaten you out like a man starved, his nose bumping into your clit as his tongue fucked you. It had been messy and loud but you hadn’t cared about the neighbors or your dignity, not with the way his fingers had finally curled into you. 

“Bradley,” You’d gasped when you finally came, back arching and fingers tightening in his hair to the point where your knuckles ached.

He’d held you through it, had let you rock your hips against his face and not complained at all. In fact, he’d seemed delighted by the way you’d let yourself just feel, pleasure wracking your body and consuming your mind in a haze.

Kissing his way up your body, he’d slid his hands under the shirt and groped you gently. You remember the way your mind had stayed cloudy and you’d floated, tethered only to the real world by the way his thumbs flicked gently at your nipples.

“I’m here, I’m here,” He’d panted into your mouth as you whined when he’d sat back slightly to kick off his briefs and hitch your thighs over his waist, “I’ve got you.”

The first time Bradley had ever slid his cock into you, you knew you’d never be the same, that you’d never be able to go back. Not when he’d kept himself hovering over you just barely, propped up on his elbow, with his lips still brushing yours and his dog tags catching in the sheen of sweat along your sternum. Not when he rocked into you inch by inch, making the world around you blur into nothingness. 

You’d let yourself fall apart under him, let yourself sink into the mattress and just take whatever he was willing to give you. He’d fucked you deeper and more gently than anyone before–to this day, you’re not even sure you can classify it as ‘fucking’, that always felt too vulgar for the way he’d brushed his lips over your cheekbones and murmured sweet nothings. 

But saying Bradley had, and still does, made love to you means trying to find something from nothing, means discerning some sort of level of connection he’s never made clear. You’re not trying to break your own heart more than you already are.

In spite of that, you can’t forget the way he’d held you like you were precious, like you were everything to him. He’d cum inside you with a guttural moan, a punched out gasp at the way you’d clenched around him. It had made you realize that was all you’d ever wanted, Bradley warm around you and inside you, him making you feel complete in a way you hadn’t known you weren’t whole before. 

He’d been a perfect gentleman when you’d both come down, easing out of you so he could clean up. He’d massaged your thighs and hips where you were sure you would’ve been aching the next morning if he hadn’t, had apologized under his breath at the fingerprints now dotying your hips. He’d thumbed at the collar of the Navy shirt where it had stayed on your frame the entire time, looking pensive but never saying anything.

You’d woken up alone the next morning, a sticky note on the bedside table reading–Had to run for work. Thanks for having me over. A messy heart and a hastily scrawled Bradley closing off the message. 

And so it went. So it goes. 

During the day, you and Bradley are the paragon of good friendship–he’ll send you memes when he gets access to his phone in between flights and lessons, you’ll pick him up after work to go to the beach. The two of you don’t talk about it–because what is there to talk about? 

No words are ever exchanged about the way that Bradley clears out a drawer for you at his place, you just find a few of the things you’d left at his place in there one day. You never give back his Navy shirt, not when you find yourself wearing it more often than not. Nothing is said about how you start picking up his favorite flavors of ice cream and his preferred brand of coffee creamer, you just make a habit of throwing them into your cart when you go to the store.

And everything is fine. It really is. You disregard the side glances from Phoenix and Bob as they see you leave with Bradley on Friday and Saturday nights, you ignore the way Hangman wiggles his eyebrows at you when Bradley insists on paying for your drinks. Just friends, is all. Just friends.

They can make their assumptions, whisper while you’re out of ear shot, but they don’t see the quiet, comfortable domesticity that you and Bradley engage in when the two of you are alone. You go back to his after beach afternoons since it’s closer to your favorite spot, and the two of you will shower (separately) and make dinner together. Sometimes you’ll sleep over if you’re working remote the next day, sometimes you’ll go home.

On weekends, Bradley picks you up in the morning, trunk holding a cooler full of drinks and snacks, and you two will go to the beach again or go on a hike. Sometimes Phoenix or Bob or the whole crew will come along, sometimes they won’t. 

Just friends. And it’s fine.

Until everything isn’t fine. 

Bradley and you have been at this for a few months now, and you can feel yourself cracking. You’re reaching out to kiss him when you do wake up together, before your brain is awake enough to stop you, reminding you that that’s not what you two do. On an outing to a boardwalk teeming with life and populated by those games you can win stuffed animals at, you resist the urge to press him against the railing of the pier and lick the taste of your shared gelato cone out of his mouth. 

When the dam finally breaks, it begins like any other night. You have a margarita and a half in you, some concoction that Phoenix insisted you try that’s actually good. Bradley’s already done a rendition of My Way at Penny’s request, but for now the jukebox is blaring some 80s hit Hangman picked out.

You can feel yourself swaying to the beat, just letting the warmth of the moment sink in as you’re surrounded by your friends, the people you love. 

“Hi,” Bradley breathes into your ear as he sidles up next to you, his arms coming to settle around your waist. You can feel his warmth through the flimsy fabric of the dress you’ve got on.

“Hi Brad,” He hates it when people call him that–lets you get away with it though. “What’cha doin’?”

“Waitin’ for you.” He leans his entire body weight against you, making you slump against the table you’re standing next to.

“Ah! Bradley, stop it.” You try to stand, but the way he’s laughing makes it hard to shake yourself from his grip, “What do you mean you’re waiting for me? I’m waiting for you.”

The grin he shoots you is electric, and for a moment you think he’s going to kiss you, right here in the middle of the Hard Deck, with all your friends around and in Penny and Mav’s line of sight. That thought makes your heart skip a beat.

“Come home with me?” He whispers, just barely letting his voice rise above the background noise, and when you don’t respond immediately, “Or let me take you home?”

That’s all it takes, really, for you to agree. The way he’s so willing, so malleable, for you. You’re leading him out by the hand without responding to his questions, making your way to the Bronco that’s parked in the back corner of the lot. 

Bradley keeps the foolish grin on his face the entire time he drives back to your apartment. The warmth radiating from him doesn’t abate when he licks into your mouth once the two of you are inside. One of his palms rests against your heart, the other working its way up your thigh and inside your panties that are already damp. 

“You’re so good to me,” He murmurs, dipping his fingers below your waistband and brushing through your curls, feeling just how slick you are. 

All you can do is whine as he picks you up and makes his way to your bedroom. For once, he doesn’t trip or stub his toe on anything, and it somehow heightens the intensity. Normally, you and Bradley seek comedic relief of some sort, something to cut the tension and keep it from making your chest tighten in a way that feels like a warning. This time, you aren’t granted any such reprieve.

He undresses you slowly and deliberately, letting his fingertips drag lightly up your sides and over your shoulders. He shrugs his Hawaiian shirt off easily, and lets you yank his wife beater over his head without complaint. 

Then, the two of you are just staring at each other, both panting lightly. You’re propped up on your elbows, staring up at him only in your panties. Bradley’s got one hand about to pop the button of his jeans, but he’s frozen. You feel like you can’t move but also like something might be changing. 

You don’t want it to change, you don’t want to lose Bradley in more ways than one. If this is what he’s willing to give you, you don’t want this to change. 

He nearly falls over when his foot gets stuck in his jeans, and even that doesn’t break the tension. Once he’s climbing over you, enveloping you, kissing up your stomach and neck, you forget all about decorum and keeping up appearances.

The whine that echoes around the room is pathetic and high pitched, but it’s the only way you think to communicate to Bradley how bad you need him in that moment. His hips are rocking gently against yours and you want the layers gone, you need to feel him. 

“I know, sweetheart, I know,” And his hands are around your hips, dragging your underwear off you unceremoniously. 

Although he makes a good attempt at going down on you, you don’t let him. You dig your fingers into his shoulder and yank at his hair to keep his face level with yours and kiss him desperately.

“I want to eat you out, please?” The depth of his voice sends a shiver through you.

Normally he wouldn’t even have to ask, but you don’t want that right now. You just want to feel him inside you. 

“Need you in me, please,” You take a heaving breath before the pleading spills out of you, “Pleasepleasepleaseplease–”

He shushes you as you scrunch your face up, not knowing how else to convey your desires in that moment, “Okay. I’ve got you, it’s okay.”

You almost wail in protest when his fingers slide into you. You can’t figure out why you feel like you’re burning up from the inside out, why you feel so fucking needy. 

“Sweetheart you gotta let me prep you somehow, just–” 

You feel like the embarrassment might kill you when you keen at the feeling of his fingers inside you. The way you’re trying to be good, you really are, because he does have a point. Plus, you have to be fair to Bradley, this isn’t just about you. 

So you hold still, let him work his fingers in and out of you as you pant and clutch at his shoulders like a lifeline. His mouth presses against yours, works its way over your cheeks and down your throat. He sucks a mark gently into your collarbone, and you ignore the way your brain reminds you about having to cover that up for work. 

He doesn’t shut up the entire time, just keeps telling you how good you’re doing for him, how good you feel, how he’s been thinking about this all night. The world seems to go right-side up again when he pushes into you. 

You whimper at the way he rocks his hips ever so gently before pulling out. He kisses you again and again, only letting his lips leave yours so he can kiss your forehead or cheeks. The motion of his hips is a steady tempo, he keeps time with your breaths that turn into moans when you start feeling that telltale coil in your stomach. 

He runs his tongue along your teeth and you’re done for. You clench down on him and dig your nails into his skin, bucking your hips up as your orgasm washes over you like a tidal wave. 

Bradley fucks you through it like every other time, yes, but this time there’s something about the way he stutters out a moan and his hips match the faltering rhythm as he finishes right after you. The shallow rocking of his hips continues and you try to ignore the prickling of tears at the corners of your eyes. 

Something tells you that this time, you shouldn’t have let Bradley take you home. When he pulls his face back from yours and he rolls the two of you onto your sides without pulling out, he’s got this look on his face that screams unspoken words. He cups your face and strokes your cheekbone with his thumb without saying anything. 

The two of you are quiet as he cleans you up, as you dress yourself in another one of his shirts.

When you wake up the next morning, Bradley isn’t there. It doesn’t shock you necessarily, sometimes he stays, sometimes he has to leave to be on time for work.

What does send a terrible feeling trickling down your throat and into your stomach is the post-it, all four square inches covered in sloppy hearts. Bradley had signed his name in the bottom left corner, characteristic chicken scratch labeling it as him even if the name wasn’t enough.

This has to end.

Don’t pick up the phone, he’s only calling because he’s drunk and alone.

You last about three rings before you cave in, waiting for the sound of his voice to echo around the apartment. You’re holding your breath.

“I knocked.” Is all he says before you’re on your feet, making your way to the door.

There he is, and although you know he isn’t really drunk, you know he’s got a beer or two in him from the way he doesn’t try to hide how he looks at you. You hate the way you’re weak for him.

You’ve been caving to him more than once a week since that first night, since Bradley had knocked your world off kilter. Though you’re in bed together almost every night, whether at his place or yours, you don’t have sex nearly every time. Part of you thinks that might make it worse. It really had been fine at first, but the first morning you’d cried at the sight of that sticky note covered in hearts, you’d known you had to try and put an end to this.

“We’ve got to stop meeting like this,” He tries, a crooked grin splitting his face as he walks toward you, but you know he doesn’t mean his words at all. 

“Bradshaw, have you been drinking?” You want to not want this, want to not want the way his gaze pins you down, the way the length of his body against yours just feel so right.

Let him being drunk and you being sober be the excuse, you beg silently. You can’t manage to force out that maybe he should go home, sleep this off in his own bed. You can’t find it in yourself to tell him to leave, to reject his advances. Watching as if outside your own body, he shuts the door behind him and walks up to you. 

Your chest aches with unconfessed feelings when he takes your face in his hands and lets his forehead rest against yours. His lips are soft and warm against yours, his mustache tickling you lightly when it brushes against your face. The whine you let out matches his soft groan, and the two of you stand there making out for a few minutes, almost as if you’re both content to just drink each other in without further motives. 

“I’ve got you sweetheart, I’ve got you,” And he’s picking you up.

You yelp at the way you’re suddenly lifted from the ground and you bury your face in his neck. You hate heights, your feet off the ground anything more than a few inches sends you spiraling in short order. But it’s Bradley who’s holding you, and some part of you knows he’d never let you fall, never let you crash into the ground. 

The way you two fall into your bed is too natural, it makes your stomach churn. His fingers find their place on your hips, around your thighs. It’s all too easy. You wish it would be a bit more awkward, that the chemistry could be imagined or false–instead you’re confronted by the way your bodies flow with one another’s all too easily. 

Again, somehow, you’re in nothing but his Navy shirt. 

Maybe I should give it back, the thought flits through your mind and you feel guilty immediately. Bradley always seems to take a special sort of pleasure from fucking you in his shirt, and you selfishly want to keep that bargaining chip, to have something that tethers him to you. If he won’t come back to press you into your sheets, then maybe he’ll come back one last time to get his shirt when this inevitably unravels. 

“Sweetheart,” He groans softly when his fingers reach the way you’re embarrassingly wet between your legs. 

It takes everything in you not to jerk back from his touch–you still don’t know how to confront the way you’re so responsive to his touch. His mere presence.

“I missed you.”

It slips out before you can stop yourself, your lips part and you breathe the words before you can do anything about it. He chooses that exact moment to dip a fingertip into your fluttering, but empty, hole, and you arch your back and moan. Instead of responding, he kisses you hungrily, all pretense gone. 

This isn’t something entirely tender, not anymore. He’s searching for something, a certain reaction, with the way he adds and then curls his fingers inside of you. He finds it when you jerk underneath him at the way he pets at that spot inside you you can never seem to reach on your own. 

He mumbles against your lips, “There you go,” As you squirm under him, the press of his fingers inside you relentless.

He works his fingers in and out of you, not taking anything in return. It’s all you can do to hold on to him and whine pitifully. Every sensation feels amplified, feels electric because it’s him. 

The two of you settle into a familiar rhythm for as long as it takes for Bradley to make you cum the first time. You’re rocking against him through the aftershocks and you can feel the way he’s hard against you through his clothes.

He’s still dressed. The realization sends a bolt of shame through you, but it doesn’t linger long. 

He’s shoving his jeans down his legs, not bothering with wiping his hand clean and you shiver at the thought that he’ll have to put them on again, you streaked across them. He makes quick work of his boxers too, and it occurs to you that he must’ve lost his shirt somewhere along the way when he presses his bare chest against your still clothed one.

“Bradley, Bradley,” You chant, “Take off my shirt.”

It’s the most demanding you’ve probably ever been with him, but he laughs at you anyways. There’s a glint in his eye as he sits up, his hard cock bobbing between his thighs. The sight of his naked form between your spread legs makes you swallow hard and your mouth water. 

“I like you in my shirt.” There’s something unsaid there, something about claims and ownership that isn’t truly possession, but a reminder of who belongs to whom regardless.

You pull it off your head in protest, and grab his wrist to drag him back down to you. You let yourself indulge in trailing a hand down the firm planes of his body down to where he’s smearing precum against your thigh. He’s heavy and pulsing in your hand and a light hiss rushes through his clenched teeth when you grip him tightly and twist with your wrist. 

“Fuck, fuck, not gonna last if you–” Bradley cuts himself off with a groan as you swipe your thumb over his head. 

It’s your turn to laugh, “You just got here.”

“Well, have you ever had sex with yourself? It’s tough out here–give a guy a break.”

The both of you dissolve into giggles at that, as you try to imagine how you would look sprawled under yourself. You can’t picture it, but the image of Bradley under or over you makes you think you might understand. 

He lines his hips up with yours once you’re both done making fools of yourself at the thought of you having sex with yourself (it reminds you of a drunk hypothetical you’d spent thirty minutes on with Hangman once–would you have sex with a clone of yourself?). 

The first push of him inside you cuts through the lighthearted mood immediately. It always shocks you how perfectly he fits inside you despite his size, how incredibly full you feel when his hips meet yours. The gentle friction of the neat curls at the base of his cock against your clit always provides a stimulation that makes your brain go fuzzy. 

The snap of his hips against yours is more intense this time, a sort of rhythm that makes you briefly think about the way the headboard might start knocking against the wall. But all thoughts, really, fly out of your head when Bradley brings a hand up to your nipples, the steady stroke of his fingers over the swell of your breasts as practiced and knowing as everything else he’s doing to you. 

All you can do is run your hands down his back, scratch your nails against his skin ever so often when he brushes against something so sweet and perfect inside you. You clench around him just to see the reaction it’ll get, and you’re rewarded with a broken groan.

“You’re not fighting fair,” He gasps, and he hitches one of your thighs up so he can press more insistently into you. 

You have a clever comeback somewhere in you–something about how you weren’t aware that the two of you were fighting, but it’s swallowed as he presses his lips into yours again. He seems absolutely intent on showing you exactly how you make him feel because the sensations of pleasure become overwhelming. 

“Fuck sweetheart, you feel perfect, god you’re so wet for me,” He’s rambling mindlessly, but you let it happen, clinging to any expression of emotion, any sliver of dedication in his tone that you can hold on to til the next time you find yourself in this position. 

You know he’s close when his grip on your thigh tightens forcefully and the strokes go from long and deep to slightly shorter and stunted. He’s grunting and gasping, but it’s all the best thing you’ve ever heard. 

“Come for me Bradley, I want to feel you,” And at that, he follows your orders, listens to you for once in his life. 

Everything is hazy as he keeps himself hovering over you and continues to rock his hips. You start to try and tell him he can pull out before his fingers find your clit and he dives back in to kiss you passionately. 

Bradley is a perfectionist at heart, an overachiever. You suppose it isn’t entirely ridiculous that that extends to his performance in the bedroom–he’s insistent you finish every time, and always more than him. Feeling the way he’s still warm and heavy inside you, his lips firm against yours, brings you over the edge more quickly than you’d like to admit. 

Still, you heave a shuddering gasp and let the pleasure wash over you. It’s overwhelming and all consuming, but he’s there through all of it til you feel yourself come back into your own body. 

You think he might be writing something on your skin, the way his finger loops and dips softly over your hip bone as he kisses you gently. He’s softening inside you and you can feel the mess the two of you made under your hips, except he isn’t moving, not yet at least, to rectify that situation. 

For once, you don’t push him to go clean up or scold him for another set of ruined sheets, you just let yourself bask in the moment as you imagine a world where the two of you will talk about this in the morning. You think of a timeline where this is where you end up because it’s where you’re meant to be, not because it’s something you’re choosing despite how it hurts you every time. You think of a place where Bradley is yours and you are his, wholly and completely.

Don’t let him in, you’ll have to kick him out again. 

“Didn’t you have a date tonight?” You breathe into his mouth.

Bradley just hums in response, brushing his lips over yours, down your jawline and your throat. His breath comes in warm puffs over your collarbones before he pulls back.

Hands pinned above your head, you squirm under his gaze. There’s something so intense about the way he’s looking at you, but you can’t bring yourself to squeeze your eyes shut to avoid it. Both of you lost your clothes somewhere on your way to the bedroom, and you’re thinking about how to persuade him to be the one to pick it all up when this is inevitably over. 

He smells like expensive cologne, and he’s got some product in his hair that made it difficult for you to brush your hands through it earlier. Plus, Phoenix had been dropping unsubtle hints earlier in the week (Hangman had affectionately called her out, a little sigh following— “You’re being such a shit stirrer.”)

“Bradley,” You try again, this time with a slight whine.

Did he seriously ditch some girl that’s probably been waiting on their date all week for this?

He responds by whispering your name back to you, the same tone undercutting the way he says it, “That doesn’t matter, I’m here now.”

The urge to keep complaining rises in you but he preempts your worries by licking into your mouth when you open it. 

He presses you into the mattress, weighing you down as he kisses you languidly, as if he’s trying to taste every part of you, as if he’s trying to memorize the sounds that escape you when he does. The warmth of his body makes your mind fog, and for the time being, everything else but this goes quiet. 

Distantly, you know that in the morning, he’ll have to leave. At the very least, he’ll have to go back to his to grab his stuff for the beach, a change of clothes. It isn’t kicking him out, but watching him leave again and again has started to build this pit at the bottom of your stomach. 

It would be different, you think, if the two of you were together. Because then, him leaving wouldn’t mean much where there would be an implicit promise and understanding that he was going to come back. Every time he closed the door behind him, you swallowed the fear that that would be your final memory of him. 

You’re selfish though. And you want to focus on the feeling of his touch instead of thinking about how you may never get to have this again. 

He makes it easy. Bradley pulls his shirt off and his dog tags make a gentle clinking sound as they hit each other and then finally come to rest on his chest. He looks like a god, backlit by the setting sun coming through your windows. 

This is how you want to remember him. Smiling down at you as he dives back in to kiss you breathless, twitching when you skim your fingertips up his sides because he’s ticklish. 

He makes short work of your shirt and sleep shorts, then his jeans are discarded. He stops briefly when his fingers reach the waistband of your underwear, a silent question that you answer by lifting your hips and letting him pull them off you. 

Every time he’s between your legs, he has this reverent look on his face, and it makes your chest twist at the fact that this time is no different. He holds your thighs open gently but firmly, and he presses his face into your pussy. Then, his tongue is darting out and licking up your core, flat and wide. 

You’d asked him once, if he likes going down on you. With a gleam in his eye, Bradley had said it was second only to being inside of you. You think of that as he eats you out enthusiastically, as you bury your hands in his hair and pull. 

He slides his tongue in and out of you, curls it around your clit and sucks in a way that makes your back arch and your thighs clenched around his head. Then, he’s slipping a finger inside and fucking you slowly with it. It makes you shiver as you realize how close you are. 

“Sweetheart, fuck, you taste incredible,” He murmurs, more to himself than anything else, pulling back briefly to make eye contact and you feel the way your breath quickens at the intensity of his gaze.

It only takes a few more minutes of him licking into you, tonguing at your clit, and adding another finger before you feel that familiar swooping in your stomach, before you’re choking out his name. Your back arches so much it aches, but it’s all you can do as the pleasure is all consuming. Bradley works you through it like every other time, holding you and letting you take what you need from him.

Then, he’s on you in an instant, kissing you furiously and sliding his hardness up and down you, covering himself in your slick. It’s filthy and sloppy but neither of you seem to mind. He lets himself rut against you til you’re hooking your legs around him and digging one of your heels into his back.

“Alright, alright,” He’s trying to sound nonchalant, but you know he’s more affected than his light tone lets on. 

The first push into you is always the most intense, but you suck in a deep breath that you force out through your teeth.

“I know, I know,” He croons, pressing little kisses all over your face as you adjust to him.

Bradley inches into you slowly, inch by inch. The initial stretch subsides til it’s replaced by the sweetest feeling of fullness, the way you can feel all of him. 

If there’s one thing the Navy’s good for, it’s the sheer strength Bradley possesses and has to maintain. You feel it in the way he fucks you, his back muscles rippling as you hold on for dear life. You feel it in the way his hips press into yours, shunting you slightly up the mattress.

For a while, the only sounds in the room are his hips meeting yours and the slick between the two of you. Momentarily, he pulls away from kissing you to look down to where he’s disappearing inside of you, that ring of you collecting at the base of his cock. His groan is guttural and broken. 

“Fuck, Bradley, it feels so good.”

He leans down again to kiss you sloppily, and the simple action of him burying a hand in your hair and twisting his wrist makes your heart skip a beat. He always knows exactly what you need when you need it. 

“C’mon, come for me, sweetheart, let me feel you.”

And because you’ve never been able to deny him anything, there you are, hurtling over the edge again. He’s everywhere around you, inside you, and his tongue in your mouth is the last thing you need to feel that wave crest inside of you. Bradley’s moan is deep as he feels you bare down on him and he follows you shortly after.

The moments after, when the glow is still settling and your mind is still hazy, are your favorite. Your mind is too foggy to focus on the fact that you know he’ll be leaving, but present enough to feel the way he doesn’t stop pressing kisses to your lips. You’re cognizant of how he cleans you up tenderly and presses his fingers into the skin of your thighs and hips just to watch it dimple. 

In those precious few minutes, that’s all that exists to you.

Don’t be his friend, you know he’s going to wake up in your bed in the morning. If you’re under him, you’re sure as hell not getting over him. 

You’re trying to ignore him, you really are. You start going to the beach an hour earlier than you usually do, hoping that he’s maintaining his schedule. Every tall brunette jogging across the sand sends your heart into overdrive. 

You still see Bradley when you go to the Hard Deck for a drink, but you keep a respectable distance between the two of you. If Phoenix mentions a round of pool, you jump at the chance, while asking Bob and Payback if they’d like to be the opposing team. You ignore the way your heart jumps into your throat when you can feel his eyes on you. 

Every note of Great Big Balls of Fire feels like a stab in the chest, and you hold back tears of frustration when you see some girl wrap her arms around his neck and rock along with him as he belts out the lyrics. You’re a fool. 

You’ve been ignoring his calls about Saturday morning beach runs and the memes he sends during the day go unanswered except for the little reactions iPhones let you send. You suppose it’s only fair that he gets to ignore you a little bit too.

Your little charade doesn’t last long, not truly in the grand scheme of things. Bradley doesn’t put up with you skirting his advances for long–he knows what he wants and he’ll be relentless til he gets it. And right now, he’s trying to corner you. 

And you’re weak for him. You should’ve known from the start that you wouldn’t be able to resist him. You can’t even now, even when you’re only getting him in pieces.

It’s not exactly your bravest moment to be hiding slightly behind Phoenix so he can’t see you (if you can’t see him, he can’t see you, right?) while she stares at you with an endlessly amused expression in her eyes. She doesn’t move to expose you, though.

“What’cha doin’?” Her tone is light, but you can tell she means business. 

The two of you are friends yes, but she’s known Bradley for a million times longer. There’s some girl-girl solidarity, but if you were in her shoes, you might have a few bones to pick about potentially throwing Bradley to the wolves on this one. You wonder for a moment if he’s been talking to her about all this, but again, is there even anything to talk about?

“Just uh, trying to see where Hangman’s at?” You sound like you’re asking her a question, and she quirks an eyebrow. 

She stretches the syllables of her next word out, letting it hang in the air, “Right. Even I don’t look at Hangman with that sort of intensity.”

That’s not entirely true, but you don’t really feel like getting into a competition with Phoenix of all people, over who’s looking at whom how. 

“Sweetheart? Can we talk?” 

You’d let Phoenix distract you for just a split second, and there he is, in all his glory. Bradley is beautiful, yes, but he looks tired. His sunny’s are hanging haphazardly from a floral button down that looks like it’s maybe seen better days, and he’s got dark circles marring the perfect tone of his tanned skin. 

This time, Phoenix just side-steps you and lets Bradley into your space. 

His presence is just as affecting there, in the middle of the Hard Deck, as it was the first time you saw him on the beach. Even with how tired he looks, he’s still glowing just slightly in the evening sun.

“Hi, Bradley,” You breathe, not daring to speak louder, as if that would make the moment real. 

You can feel Phoenix’s eyes on you, the way that Bob and Payback are starting to let their attention drift to from the game of pool. This, you don’t want anyone else to be witness to. This is something between just the two of you. You don’t really need the whole world to witness your imminent heartbreak. 

“I don’t want to do this here, is my place okay?” He looks so nervous, as if you’re going to push him away. It’s funny really, what you know is about to happen, and yet he still looks like this is about to break him entirely. 

Nodding, you let him lead you out of the bar. It feels like deja vu, how however many weeks ago you were tracing these exact steps but making your way towards a very different fate. 

The two of you are silent in the Bronco, and Bradley doesn’t bother turning the radio up to belt along to the 80s classic on the radio. Everything feels like you’re underwater, like the world is out of focus. You think you might start crying, but you try and swallow it down, be an adult. 

Pulling into the driveway, it’s silent in the car when he turns the engine off. Neither of you go to get out, but you know you can’t sit here forever. This had to happen at some point, had to come to a close. That doesn’t make getting out of the car and waiting for Bradley to unlock the door any easier, though. 

You toe off your shoes and let him get you a glass of water. Then, you’re standing on opposite sides of his kitchen, the pristine shine of the countertops and appliances making him feel a thousand miles away. You two are usually tumbling in, mouths locked together, or walking in with groceries, prepared to spend a comfortable evening cooking and watching a movie. This is everything coming apart at the seams. 

“Bradley,” You start, not really knowing where you’re going, but just wanting to break the silence.

He looks distraught and your stomach drops with guilt. 

This is your fault. 

He says your name once as he settles back against a countertop, and it hangs in the air between the two of you, til he starts speaking again, “I’ve been trying to figure out where I went wrong, what lines I crossed, and I guess at some point I realized it was all of them. I shouldn't have pushed you, I shouldn’t have–”

“I thought that that was all I could have of you, so I was selfish and I took it.” You say, the words tumbling out of you before you can stop yourself from interrupting him, but still unable to tear your eyes away from him, “But I was hurting you. I still am, and god, Bradley, I’ll make it up to you somehow, I’m so sorry.”

It’s almost funny, really, the way you’ll look back on this moment a year from now and laugh at the way the two of you are talking past each other, unwilling to acknowledge that your deepest desires could be attainable. But for now, all you can feel is the guilt in your veins, your heartbeat pounding your chest. 

“What?” He’d looked at the floor for a moment, but when you finish speaking he’s looking at you intently. “What did you say?”

Taking a deep breath, you steel yourself and start from the beginning, “I thought that you coming to me, like that, was the only way I could have you. And, and maybe it was me taking advantage because you were sometimes not super sober, but I would never–”

“I was always sober. Every time. I would never do that to you. What do you mean that was the only way you thought you could have me?” Bradley’s standing fully now, not leaning. 

“I thought you drank before, to, y’know, make it tolerable.” You regret the words as soon as you say them, “Sorry, that’s–you’re not that kind of person.”

He smiles ruefully, “I’m still focused on the part about that being the only way you could have me.”

Here it is. 

“I love you, Bradley. And not just as a friend, but more. But I didn’t want to push that on you, and so I thought–”

“You love me?”

A beat.

“Yes.”

Then, he’s laughing in that hysterical way when people are so overcome, the only way it’ll escape them is if they double over in giggles. But he’s trying to compose himself as quickly as he started. 

“I tried to tell you so many times how I felt, I left you all those post-it notes, god, I thought you were seeing them and just didn’t feel the same.”

“I-I don’t understand.”

“The hearts. That’s how I,” He heaves a shuddering breath, his voice thick with unshed tears, “That’s how I told my parents I loved them before I could really write. I was saying it to you every time I left.”

“You love me?” You’re crying now, and he squeezes his eyes shut til tears run down his cheeks too. 

His laugh is bitter but you know that’s not directed at you, “Was the sticky note covered in hearts not clear enough?”

You feel the way your cheeks warm and your stomach churns as you try and defend yourself, “You were thanking me for letting you sleep over?”

At that, he laughs, genuine this time, breaking the sadness that has been building in the air. Finally, he makes his way across the room to you and crowds into your space, wrapping you in his arms and pressing his forehead to yours. His eyes are closed. 

“Sweetheart.” It’s a warning, a plea, and a prayer all in one. “I meant every heart, every I love you, from the very first one I left.”

“I kept them all. In my bedside table.”

Then his lips are on yours. The kiss is salty, reminding you of all the emotion that’s been building for the past few months, every moment you didn’t confess, every moment you assumed the worst, it’s all there. But you don’t want to dwell on that now, now that you’ve heard him say something plucked from your wildest dreams.

“Say it again,” You whisper when his lips leave yours ever so briefly as the two of you are stumbling to the bedroom.

And he does. As he’s undressing you, he says it. He mumbles it against your lips and into your mouth. 

He says it against your bare skin as he presses you into his bed, the sheets smelling like him before he puts on cologne. It’s muffled momentarily by the way he takes one of your nipples into his mouth, but you feel the way his jaw works anyways as you cup his face. You let your legs fall open around him and feel the way he slides his fingers into you.

When he’s pressing into you, he’s saying it. I love you, I love you, I love you.

In those moments between start and finish, when the world falls away and all you know is the warmth of his body against yours, the slight slick of sweat on your skin, that’s when you think you realize that he means it. The motion of his hips is deep and insistent, as if to try and leave a permanent reminder that he was there. 

You’re crying, you realize. And he’s kissing the tears away like it’s the most natural thing in the world, pressing his forehead to yours as his lips keep forming the words. At some point, you’ve started saying them back to him too, choking them out despite everything so that you know that he knows that you love him.

When you finish, it feels like a supernova exploding inside of you. It starts in the center of your body and pushes its way to your fingertips til you’re gasping for air and he fucks you through it. Bradley cums moments later, filling you with his warmth in a way that’s both familiar and still thrilling. 

He rolls gently off you, and you hiss as he slips out. That’ll be a mess to clean up. 

But he’s looking at you, brushing your sweaty hair from your face, and his eyes are shining so brightly that it feels like looking at the sun. You want to look away, but you think that losing your vision in return for staring at the way his eyes crinkle in genuine happiness is well worth the price. 

I love you, he mouths. And you believe him. 

You whisper it back.

tagging: @sebsxphia @roosterbruiser @bradshawburner @gretagerwigsmuse @sometimesanalice @joaquinwhorres @roosterbruiser @roosterforme @bradshawsbitch @seresinsweetie @notroosterbradshaw @genius2050 @peachystenbrough @rhettabbotts @theharddeck @wkndwlff - tagging ppl either by request or whom i feel like are horny for bradley soooo pls let me know if you'd like to be added/removed

[bloodfcst-a]

(Had to swap blogs, tumblr denies me to express my desire for headcanon questions.) Does Yuffie have a good relationship with her parents while growing up? Any particular good memories?

HEADCANON.

Yufi’s memories with her father typically have to do with proving her worthiness to him. Originally, Godo is disappointed that he doesn’t have a son…he wanted an heir, and did not consider a female to be suitable to the cause. 

His animosity is also in part that she resembles her late mother, and that’s sure to cause him grief… that Yufi, upon being brought into the world, seemingly stole the life from her mother in the process. Obviously not purposely, but Godo doesn’t need a reason to be so suspicious or hostile towards her– and his attitude with her is reflected within his staff, and extends into the community as well. It’s only when Yufi begins to openly reject and rebel against him that he begins to see the error of his ways and attempt to garner her favor…. leading them to have a strained relationship in her adulthood.

Early in Yufi’s life is dictated by Godo’s rejection of her: he places distance between her by sending her off with her paternal grandparents in infancy to older toddler, believing he has not the time, resources, or instinct to care for a child, despite living in a complex with live-in/help and personal assistants who could easily care for them as such. When the idea is suggested to him once Yufi has some autonomy (approximately age 4), Yufi returns from the countryside to the mainland, but will continue to spend the summers with her grandparents learning domesticated chores and tasks. Once she returns to the community, she’s immediately placed into the care of maidens and lecturers. Yufi does not attend formal schooling, and instead learns the basics of education along with specialized attention to history, economics, culture, calligraphy, and music. Yufi is proficient in the zither, but enjoys playing lute and the shamisen. However, despite her ability to intellectually excel, Yufi’s ever aware of her father’s avoidance of her, and asks to learns trades and skills, such as archery, alchemy, and smithery. Regardless of being well-rounded, it’s not enough to garner his attention.

As a teenager, Yufi grows tired of being paraded as an item or artifact to be showcased and instead wishes to be treated as an equal. In order to do such, however, her physical ability and prowess must be tested. Thus, Yufi learns arts of self-defense as well as attacks, finding that in lieu of her stature or overt strength, she can instead focus on stealth, evasion and precision. She trains from the bottom rank of the dojo to the top, where eventually she can challenge Godo himself. It takes a number of attempts before Yufi is successful– but even then, he does not see her as a successor; instead, he finds her worthy of being under him as second-in-command. She takes it.

As a result of Godo’s distance to her, Yufi’s hesitant in allowing people to be emotionally close to her in her relationships, and finds that even friendships can be difficult to maintain. However, she has a lighthearted personality and is fun-loving, making it easy for her to form partnerships and acquaintances– rather adequate for business. 

Yufi has two major showdowns with her father–at age 14, and again at 17. It is at 14 where she demands that he not force her into one box as either his son or his daughter… Yufi is his child, his heir, an undeniable truth that does not require Yufi to either be just a treasure OR just a talented person… Yufi can and is both. At 17, when Yufi is successful at besting Godo both intellectually and physically, she demands he recognize her for what she is… worthy, or risk losing her forever. Given that he’s already lost his wife, he has no intention of losing the remainder of his family and then attempts from then on to put in effort towards their relationship. 

Even as an adult, Yufi recognizes him as a parent in the sense that she came from him and that he provided for her… but doesn’t hold a close relationship to him outside of recognizing his position of reverence as leader of their community, and that she must defect decisions to him. She also recognizes that bad publicity she creates would reflect poorly on him, so she is hyper-vigilant of how and what she’s recognized for in public, using it to either promote him or weaponizing it against him depending on the situation. Godo realizes that he does not know anything substantial about Yufi, and attempts to learn more about her interests and to bring associated businesses into the community in order to win favor. It’s not entirely successful, but Yufi appreciates the thought and does notice his effort, despite how late it took him to actually care. She still isn’t entirely convinced it’s for her well-being, suspicious that he primarily cares about his own prestige before her.

But in reality, it’s more or less that Godo is pained by Yufi because he remembers her late mother Kasumi when he sees her, and he just… doesn’t handle his sadness in a manner that allowed him to have a cohesive relationship with his child.

So…. he’s a bad dad and Yufi’s insecurities stem from him……. she’ll have daddy issues forever…. all the pieces come together now.

Are there good memories? I mean… the small moments of praise he would give her, perhaps, because she loves being noticed, likes the attention he would sporadically give her if she succeeded. And as a result, Yufi for some time attempted to perfect everything…. until that rift at 14, when Yufi finally decided that life is worth living and being true to herself first and foremost before anyone else… including her family. 

Money can buy a lot of things but it can’t really buy substantial relationships, and… it’s taken Godo a long time to see that providing means a lot more than just the physical… it’s the emotional bond as well.

I hope that was helpful! …….and sad.

[deidearly]

Kakashi Relationship Headcanons

Guess who’s back with another relationship headcanon today? And as usual, I had a good time writing this one even got slightly carried away, hehe. Enjoy! XX. 

Well— Hatake Kakashi, huh? Dating him would be such a roller coaster ride, tbh. It’s like, one moment he’s so clingy, fragile, so afraid of losing you— but one moment he’s like, “Just do what you need to do. I don’t really care.” This is due to the fact that he’s got a lot of things in his mind and occasionally struggled to sort out his priorities. 

Anyway, of course you’ve complained about his ‘reading-smut-in-public’ issue, especially when you’re together. You two would come up with an agreement somehow. But to piss you off, he’d pretend like you’re the one who’s obsessed with reading smuts.

You’re browsing for some important books and he playfully yelled, “Y/N! Come here, it’s your favorite book— Icha Icha Tactics! My, I know you’ve had four books, but another one won’t hurt, right? Since you love it that much!” making everyone in the bookstore giggled.

He received “Y/N Signature Punch” that day.

To your surprise, he’s not very secretive about his relationship with you. In fact, you’ve caught him frequently use you as an excuse for him to escape some unwanted occasions.

Let’s say Gai was asking Kakashi to fight him like usual— and he wasn’t having it that day. “Gai, with all respect— I would gladly accept your challenge. But can’t you feel the springtime of romance youth is blooming? I must see Y/N immediately.”

Gai’s tearing up.

Don’t worry, he actually went to your place.

“Yo. Can we hang out? I just told Gai that I would come to your place. Please say ‘yes’ to make me less of a jerk, will you?”

Would totally show up in front of your place at an ungodly hour.

At first it surprised you but now you’re used to it.

You just finished your mission, it went pretty well but you felt there were some wasted chances due to your captain’s miscalculation. It’s nearly 2 AM but you caught yourself wide awake, reviewing back your battle– only to got distracted by a knock on your bedroom’s window. Instead of turning your head in surprise, you already knew who it was. To have a little fun for yourself, you ignored the sound, which was later followed by a second knock. Walking over to the window, you saw a silver-haired man with a mask. Although half of his face was covered, it’s obvious that a smile was apparent. “Yo.” he greeted, but you replied with a sigh. “You could actually knock on the door and I’d let you in through the door. It’s something normal people would do, Kakashi.” you grumbled, opening the window for him to get in. “Ah, spare me the lecture!”

So, reverse psychology works best for Kakashi. Like the Icha Icha Tactics– the more you ignore his behavior, he would actually try not to read his book in public like you told him to. But the more you complain, he’d read it in places where he shouldn’t be reading it at all. This method works in almost every cases.

You’ve been dating for weeks, but you haven’t seen his face.

Yes, when kissing, too.

You’ve had enough of kissing fabric. 

You had planned to make a dinner together at his place. He was preparing the dishes and you’re about to finish your cooking, when he suddenly asked, “Hey, Y/N. Have you ever wondered what would I look like under this mask?” You were dying to know actually. So, now you’re stuck with two options: (a) be honest about it, (b) pull out another reverse psychological answer— and you chose the latter. “Huh? Not really,” you shrugged, “I don’t really care so it’s not like I’m eager to see it.” and of course, this was a lie. Kakashi went silent for a while. “Anyway, dinner’s re—“ you swore you could’ve dropped the whole pan when you saw an unfamiliar presence. “Kakashi?” you asked hesitantly. The man looked up with a questioning look, “Why are you blushing?” he replied casually.

“ANYONE WITH A DECENT EYESIGHT WOULD BLUSH TOO, YOU STUPID.”

He’s honestly so heavenly to look at.

Sometimes it’s just too overwhelming to see his whole face, you thought.

It’s safe to say that it’s a privilege to be able to see his face. But due to his immense charm, you’d prefer to have him with a mask on.

“Y/N, I feel naked without my mask—“ , “And I honestly feel like I’m being forced to see an illicit nudity, too. Put your mask on, it’s fine honestly.”

He’s been very good at his job for almost his whole life, a fine shinobi. So, he’s rarely exposed to mundane things, moreover a relationship. Thus, making him quite restrained in expressing himself. Plus, he was labelled with some negative titles, saying how cold-blooded he was and he just decided to live with it. This, obviously, requires a lot of patience.

But he’s determined to change, the first step he took was letting you in— into his life.

It started rocky, though.

He’d say something like how he didn’t care much about you and sadly, he really didn’t.

But as the time went by he realized how your presence has been the one that helped him through it. How you’ve always been there to comfort him, by listening to him, giving him a lot of supports, or simply by reminding him that he’s not completely alone.

And when that moment came, he’s sworn to protect you with all his might.

He had a lot of nightmares, he still does, unfortunately. But when you’re around, your presence eases him up a little.

When you’re not around, however, he’d rather spend all night unhealthily tiring himself until he fall asleep.

His personal favorite would be curling up next to you with his hand around your waist while hiding his face near the crook of your neck as he’s giving you some soft neck kisses.

Again, NECK KISSES.

He had a hard time trying to open up himself fully to you and this applies to romantic gestures, I believe. He surely would take his time to explore you, what you like, and what he likes.

Would shower you with kisses, all over your face without missing a spot. He greatly admires every inches of yourself. 

Body worship, oof.

Lowkey (semi highkey) protective.

Lowkey (semi highkey) a show-off.

Would straight up jump to save you if it’s necessary.

And since he’s a show-off, he lowkey loves PDA— but the soft ones, of course. You two would always get spotted together. He would casually sling his arm around your shoulder or lazily has his hand wrapped around your waist.

Favorite time to spend with you is training together. No matter how many times you’ve told him to “fight with an intent to win” he simply refuses— saying how, he’s “far too powerful” for you.

But deep down he just doesn’t want to hurt you…

Chatting in the middle of a training

“Tsunade-sama hasn’t assigned me any missions lately *throws kunai*” , “Maybe if you threw your kunai accurately, she will. *dodge kunai*” , “Kakashi, shut your pretty mouth up. *throws MORE kunai aggressively*”

When you turned him down while he was showing off his new tricks, though, it weirdly turned him on.

He loves someone powerful, with a right amount of cocky.

Doesn’t talk big. He’s a man of action— his action speaks louder than words!

Doesn’t spoil you that much, though. Because it’s actually him who needs to be spoiled.

Really loves it when you trace your fingers all over his skin— it’s intimately soft, he claimed.

LOVES YOUR SCENT. Has it memorized probably.

He’d prefer someone independent. Someone who could actually take care of themselves instead of relying on him completely. 

Anyone too childish would remind him of Team 7, tbh.

Speaking of Team 7, they would probably be the one to get introduced to you.

Naruto was so shocked to find out that his sensei was capable to develop a romantic feeling towards someone. But he had his doubt— do you really know Kakashi? He started to bombard you with questions to test your knowledge.

“So, do you know what’s Kakashi Sensei’s favorite—“ , “I’ve seen his face. Multiple times.” , “YOU WHAT?”

Complained and sulked about it, “Kakashi Sensei, we’ve trained together for years. How could you?!”

Sakura was confused.

“How? I know he’s probably very handsome under that mask but come on, Y/N, reading smut in public? That’s an absolute no.”

On the contrary, Sasuke was thrilled, internally.

“Yeah. Finally. Old man has someone to annoy besides us. About time.”

He has a pretty bad behavior, too. Unlike Gaara, who’d put an emotionless facade when he’s only in the Kazekage mode, Kakashi would treat you just how he feels like doing it that day. 

Let’s be real, he has so many bottled up feelings inside his heart so it’s not a surprise that someday, somehow, a random painful emotion just hit him— hard, and he shut himself out.

The hospital is the place you immediately visit right after Kakashi’s arrival after a mission because you know he’d be there— reading his book with a few bruises here and there. But this time was a bit different. When he’s hospitalized, he would whine about you not being able to stay more than an hour— but right now you’re puzzled, since he’s been completely silent and avoiding you, answering your questions with a mere shrugs.

Tsunade told you that the mission went pretty well, thanks to Kakashi for eliminating all the enemies on the field, singlehandedly. You automatically knew that it must brought up his past traumas. “Kakashi, it’s not your fault.” you decided to speak, earning a glance from Kakashi, but that’s it. “It’s a mission and you protected all of your comrades!”

“I killed them, Y/N. I didn’t have to, but I did.” he said, with his eyes still glued elsewhere. “Every time I look at my hands, I feel dirty. It reminded me of that—“, “Kakashi, look at me.”

You moved closer to his bed, reaching out your hand and traced your fingers softly on his face. His cheeks were cold, and you could clearly see how he was slightly trembling with teary eyes. “Kakashi, if you didn’t do it— it could’ve been your own comrades. Now they’re safe and sound, thanks to you.”, you paused as he slowly began to move his sight to you. “And if I could meet you way sooner, I would remind you every day that it’s never your fault— it’s never been. You’re a good person, Kakashi. I, and all of us, are forever thankful for the things you’ve done.” you whispered, now wiping a few tears that fell down to his cheeks. A weak smile started to bloom, “I’m forever thankful for you as well, Y/N.”

[calltomuster]

(More) Star Wars Fic Recs

[first fic rec list]

Hello everyone, hope you've been having a lovely week! Here's another list of some fics I've really enjoyed reading or rereading recently. I try to have a mix of things I don't think got enough love, fics from a while ago that deserve to be reread, stuff from writers on Tumblr, and of course, just stuff I think is great.

atmosphere level by softredscrunchie (gen, one-shot, 1k words, Obi-Wan & Satine) Obi-Wan's hurt and sick and annoyed so Satine decides to distract him by arguing passionately that Mandalore is, in fact, flat. Obi-Wan, being the nerd he is, gets more and more wound up as she refuses to back down. This fic is one of the funniest things I've read in a long while, highly recommend if you're having a bad day.

a comedy in four acts by jesuisdeux (gen, one-shot, 4k words, Obi-Wan & Dooku & Yoda) Obi-Wan and Dooku both time-travel from the point of their deaths way back to when Obi-Wan was a young Padawan. Ft. Classic Dooku glowering at a 13 year-old, caring and empathetic Yoda, and Obi-Wan flat out telling a very confused Qui-Gon that he's gonna kill Dooku.

the day begins with burning by @kototyph (gen, one-shot, 6.3k words, Obi-Wan & Anakin) This fic takes place in a world where the Jedi Order finds out about the Tusken massacre and puts Anakin on trial (internally). We start off right as the Council is delivering their verdict, and it's a roller coaster of emotions from start to finish. I like it because it does not shy away from the fact that Anakin murdered a bunch of people and there really need to be consequences for that, but also isn't just Anakin bashing. The relationship between Anakin and Obi-Wan really shines through here.

The Ghosts of Memory by @pandora15 (gen, one-shot, 2.1k words, Obi-Wan & Anakin & Ahsoka) Obi-Wan and Anakin are invited back to Naboo for the ten year anniversary of the battle. I mean, that sounds relatively benign but OOF. So many feelings. So many thoughts of what could have been. Go read this fic!

Anamorphosis by avocadomoon (Obi-Wan/Padmé, one-shot, 33.5k words) Obi-Wan and (a slightly older) Padmé keep in touch after the events on Naboo and keep their eventual marriage out of the public eye. Qui-Gon lives, but the Council still doesn't accept Anakin for training so he and Shmi are taken in by a wonderful benefactor -- Sheev Palpatine. Nothing can go wrong there, right? This is an absolutely fascinating re-imagining of the prequels era. I'm so sad it's only a one-shot, because there's so much to explore here.

on sith holocrons and misunderstandings by billowypants (gen, one-shot, 7.2k words, Obi-Wan & Anakin) As the summary says, "de-aged!Obi-Wan has the same Force bonds as adult Obi-Wan, and he does not react well." Bit of an understatement, that. This fic really makes me feel bad for both Obi-Wan and Anakin. Wrap them up in blankets and give them hugs, please.

In Control by @kckenobi (gen, one-shot, 3.5k words, Obi-Wan & Anakin) I don't normally seek out fics with young Anakin, but I love KCKenobi's stuff so I was like "I'm game" and that was most definitely not a mistake. What a cute fic this is! The basic premise is that Anakin is getting his license to drive/fly a speeder and poor Obi-Wan is dragged along for the ride, literally. Highly recommend.

always gold by @happygiraffe (gen, 4/4 chapters, 10k words, Obi-Wan & Anakin) Obi-Wan hasn't been Master to Anakin for that long before he finds out his cancer is back. Oh man. Let me tell you, I don't cry easily. Really, I don't. But the most recent time I read this fic, I had to set my phone down at the end and ugly-sob for literally ten minutes before I could properly compose myself. It affected me that much. This fic showed me the power of words. My only hope is that one day I will be able to accomplish what @happygiraffe has with this fic!

fill pages with scribbled ink by magneticwave (Obi-Wan/Padmé, one-shot, 9.8k words) If I haven't talked about this fic already on here (and I might have?) then I have committed a crime. It's another Obi-Wan/Padmé fic, which is a ship I've never had a problem with but don't normally seek out, but the ones on this list are so, so good. This fic is told entirely through comm messages, and it's such a brilliant way to tell this story. I cheered the whole way through.

having loved a little while by @giggles-and-freckles (Padmé/Anakin, 1.5k words, Padmé & Ahsoka, Ahsoka & Anakin) Okay genuinely I had a hard time deciding between the four(?) fics @giggles-and-freckles wrote for the Chaos Company Exchange because they all brought me such joy, but this one stands out. Padmé is teaching Ahsoka how to cook in her apartment and they're having a really lovely moment when Anakin bursts in and then has to try and explain his unexpected presence to Ahsoka. This story had me going "awww!" in the beginning and then dying of laughter by the end. So much fun, seriously. I laughed out loud multiple times.

If you like any of these fics, please consider reblogging so they can get more exposure! And if you noticed I missed someone's Tumblr account, or linked the wrong one, please let me know!

[bibbykins]

(TW: MENTIONS OF ASSAULT)

Okay, let me breath for a second bc this chapter was a ROLLER COASTER.

I'll start with the easiest thing to digest, the car scene with Tae and Namjoon, GODDAMN, tae is completely whipped and really has a hard time not giving Bunny what she wants (thank god bc I hate edging sm, pls just get to it lmao) and Namjoon living his housewife fantasies at the fullest, GOOD FOR HIM🗣️, the smut was surprisingly enough the lightest aspect of this chapter but it wasn't overshadowed or unnecessary at all, it really balanced the chapter out specially being in the middle of it (after finding out some big things but not before the confrontation at the end of this chapter), that was a great thing to do, you're amazing!

Second of all, I really pride myself onto catching what twist will happen in a story that I'm invested, but let me tell you something, I seriously did NOT see the guys being behind bunny moving in with them, Jungkook surprised me with being involved on her assault and knowing her for over a year, but the rest? Holy shit, I really wasn't expecting it at all, I'm so amazed with being hit by a twist like that, it was great!, and Jin knowing (AND BEING FRIENDS) with Bunny's assaulter? I was so mad like this can't be happening to her, but I trust that Jungkook is going to help see things clearly for everyone (He was such in a protective mood on this chapter I kinda fell in love a little lmao) for me he was the true star of this chapter, even if he's not the best with emotions or affection, he handled everything really good and was bunny's support throughout the entire chapter and it was sweet, we love a possessive, intimidating af but a softie on the inside man in this household ☺️💕

Jungyoon's audacity keeps surprising me to this day, smh should've just let Jungkook go Maddy Perez on his ass, but I'm so happy that bunny stood up for herself! My bb is growing and I can't be more excited about it, she's finally voicing out what she wants and I feel like a proud mother lol, I honestly thought I would be scared of the boys now but it's been non threatening yandere so far so we love to see it hehe

This chapter was amazing! Thank you sm for the double update, can't wait to see what happens after that dinner, love you💕💕💕

That chapter rlly gave no one a chance to breathe rip lol

Also thank you!!! I was so worried the car scene would be awkward just thrown in there so I'm glad its purpose came across and yess!!! Taehyung and Namjoon absolutely worship her and now they can openly admit how obsessed they are? Heaven for them tbh

Also eeeee I've never done a twist rlly let a longe a several in one chapter, so I'm so glad they are sticking the landing lmaoooo. Also yeah Jin just bringing over Mr. Woo was such a gut punch and when he finds out... OOF.

Omg yes Jungkook ate this chapter. He adores Bunny and 100% puts her before his urge to go insane on people. LMAO NOT MADDY PEREZ but no def if Bunny gave him the green light Jungyoon would go down like a sack of potatoes. But yes Bunny is finding her voice and ugh I love it!!!!

Also yeah the boys are scary but never to their darling and it's such a blast to write! Thank you for gushing about this chapter with me bb ily!!!

[allwaswell16]

{Recently Read 1D Fics}

December 2020

These are all the One Direction fics I read and enjoyed in December. There are 18 recs here in all and are in order by word count and organized by pairing. You can also listen to my podcast to hear me talk about each of these fics as well as an overview of what was posted on ao3 in December! Please let the writers know if you liked the fics by leaving kudos and comments! Happy reading!

Fanfictional Podcast #19 | ko-fi | other fic recs

Larry

❄️ Have Love, Will Travel, @kingsofeverything​ (E, 97k, road trip au, secret relationship, secrets, friends to lovers, camping, state parks, RV/camper, getting together, YouTube, communication, smut, an epic road trip au)

❄️ (I'm Dreaming of a) One Night Inn, @lululawrence (NR, 54k, Advent fic, Holiday Inn au, rock star Louis, musician Harry, farm au, farmer Louis, humor, emotional hurt/comfort, friends to lovers, miscommunication, flirting, karaoke, love confessions, angst with a happy ending, oof the emotional angst, but it really does all come together in the end for everyone!)

❄️ Ideal: An Advent Fic, @iamasphodelknox / asphodelknox (M, 40k, White Christmas au, Advent fic, producer Louis, musician Harry, movie au, Christmas, angst, fluff, side Ziam, side Shiall, a lovely and sweet and beautiful Advent fic!)

❄️ Take A Chance On Me, @peachypetalhazz​ / Etoilenoire (E, 39k, uni au, crush, pining, insecure Harry, shy Harry, house party, secret admirer, blind date, concert, smut, a great wish fulfillment fic!) 

❄️ The Happiest Season, @sadaveniren (E, 37k, Happiest Season au, Advent fic, meet cute, falling in love, family drama, grief/mourning, Christmas, homophobia, coming out, first time, smut, omg what a roller coaster of a fic!)

❄️ You Don't Have To Be Lonely This Christmas, @londonfoginacup / LadyLondonderry (T, 35k, Advent fic, uni au, roommates, Christmas, library, household disasters, getting together, humor, sick Harry, oh how I loved this amazing cast of characters and all their hilarious adventures)

❄️ Sunflower: Vol. 1, @ourownstrings (M, 26k, farm au, farmer’s market, vegetable stand, flower stand, farmer Louis, flower symbolism, depression, grief, hurt/comfort, pining, sexual tension, really well written with substance and great dialogue)

❄️ (summer is over) and i wanna leave you satisfied, @doncasterkitten / patdkitten (M, 25k, college au, royal au, one night stand, ballet dancer Louis, hockey player Harry, miscommunication, smut, so enjoyable and fun to read with just the right amount of angst)

❄️ Sakura Sunset, @mizzhydes / MsHydeStylinson (E, 16k, breakup au, flower shop, florist Harry, post break up, getting back together, London, alcohol, angst with a happy ending, miscommunication, smut, hurt sooo good)

❄️ I couldn't face a life without your lights. @louisandsass (M, 15k, uni au, exes to lovers, flashbacks, enemies with benefits, jealousy, getting back together, angst with a happy ending, smut, bl, love how this story unfolded piece by piece)

❄️ Thank you, five., @nouies (E, 5k, theatre au, Hamilton, actor Harry, actor Louis, Broadway, enemies to lovers, light angst, misunderstanding, smut, such a fun au to imagine them on Broadway!)

❄️ What a Difference a Day Makes, @phd-mama​ / phdmama (E, 3k, college au, enemies to lovers, house party, frats, frat boy Harry, pre med student Louis, smut, oof very hot)

❄️ A+ Patient, @louandhazaf​ / YesIsAWorld (G, 2k, dentist Louis, patient Harry, awkward conversation, confessions, pining, omg I loved how awkward they were and that they’d been thinking about the other all along!)

❄️ That's Not Punk Rock, @londonfoginacup​ / LadyLondonderry (G, 737 words, punk au, White Eskimo, singer Harry, alcohol, humor, getting together, argument, loved how the entire thing was almost all dialogue and an argument leading to a date haha)

❄️ Reality Show AU, @deludedandlostcause​ (wip, Tumblr gif au, fake/pretend relationship, reality show, secrets, humor, I adore this gif fic!)

Nouis

❄️ Tommo the Tease, @louandhazaf​ / YesIsAWorld (E, 1k, Louis/Niall, friends to lovers, camboy Louis, secrets, masturbation, alcohol, drunken confessions, hello how I love camboy Louis!)

Shiall 

❄️ Take a Piece of My Heart, @beelou​ / cherrylarry (G, 4k, Niall/Shawn Mendes, fake/pretend relationship, Valentine’s Day, party, kissing, implied smut, getting together, so cute with such great tension throughout)

Zouis

❄️ Slowly, Sadly, and Properly, @taggiecb​ (G, 3k, Zayn/Louis, exes to lovers au, post break up, angst, crying, Liam’s wedding, awkward situation, ambiguous ending, hurt so good)