#wfc episode 2

[afterspark-podcast]

Let’s Play Transformers War for Cybertron, Chapter 2 Transcript

Episode

[This can also be found on AO3!]

[Intro Music]

O: Hi guys!  Welcome back to our Let's Play of War for Cybertron.  We're gonna be doing Chapter 2 today, and playing as the Jets.  I’m gonna take Starscream cuz he's got a sniper rifle.  (This is literally the only reason.)

S: [snickers]

O: If you remember, last time, uh, Megatron went full crackhead on us and was trying to get Dark Energon to snort- I mean to take over Cybertron.  And was basically arguing with a giant holographic [hologram] Starscream the entire time, and then at the end Starscream's like, [screechy voice] “Teach me how to control Dark Energon it'll work for you!” [normal voice] Um, so now we're being Megatron's bitch.

S: Pretty much.

O: Does that pretty much sum it up?

S: Yeah… yeah.

C: I mean, speak for yourself, uhhh…

O: [laughs]

C: Yes, master.

O: You’re just like, Skywarp- Skywarp, is nobody's bitch, thank you!  [laugh] Um, Specs is gonna be doing Thundercracker and Chezni is gonna be doing Skywarp, sooo…

C: That sounds like a drug.

O: [laughs] Uh, yeah, so Chezni's gonna be doing the Bojack?

A: [laugh]

O: I can’t remember what the chapter’s called... we are in Chapter 2, Fuel of War.  Uh, so, we ready to start then?

C: Oh yeah.

S: Sure.

[OS: Character selection screen.  Characters are assigned as follows:

Chezni - Skywarp

Specspectacle - Thundercracker

Twilight-Owls - Starscream]

O: The cool thing about the jets is we can fly!  This is the only good thing I have to say about this.

[OS: Owls selects “Start Game.”]

C: Now it really sounds like a drug.

O: [laughs] With Thundercracker, you too can fly!

C: [laughs]

[The game starts and the volume jumps for the players.]

O: [muted] Oh, dammit, I know it’s coming!

[A cinematic opens with a text crawl being narrated by Steve Blum.

Narrator: Anxious to prove themselves worthy of the Decepticon name, Starscream and his minions fly to Cybertron.

The screen flickers slightly.]

C: Woah.

[Narrator: There, they must reconnect the energon bridge that will enable Megatron to manufacture more Dark Energon and conquer the Autobots once and for all.]

O: Space crack.  And conquer Optimus Prime once and for all- got it, got it, got it, I’m tracking.

[OS: The game swaps to gameplay and the volume spikes again.]

O: [muted]  Noooo, dammit.

[(COM) Megatron: Your orders are clear Starscream!  Infiltrate the Cybertron underground and reactivate the Energon Bridge.  I want that power online!

OS: All three seekers fly down into an enclosed area, and shoot missiles at a giant fan to gain access to another underground area on Cybertron.  The area they enter has various metal platforms rising out of what looks to be a sea of blue energon in the bottom of the area.

The screen reads, “New Objective: Find the Hidden Underground Entrance.”

Starscream: Megatron, Thundercracker has detected several Autobots up ahead.  Jetfire must have warned Zeta Prime and moved to intercept us already!

(COM) Megatron: Enough of your whining!  If the Autobots try to stop you, crush them!  Report back to me when you have found the Bridge.  Megatron out!]

S: Oh.  Yay.  I get to fly, don’t I?

[SS: Thundercracker rocks slightly back and forth in jet mode.]

O: Yup!

C: Yeahhhh.

O: Don’t- don’t uh, touch that blue stuff, you will explode if I remember properly?

[Starscream: That imbecile thinks I’m expendable.  ME!?  He’ll soon learn to never underestimate Starscream!

OS: Starscream looks down at the blue energon visible on the floor of the level, and then uses his thrusters to continue on ahead.]

S: Blue stuff, uhhh?

O: On the bottom there.

C: The ocean below us.

O: Maybe I’m wrong.

S: Ahh.  Okie dokie.

C: Maybe- maybe she's wrong Thundercracker, go try it!

S: [laughs] No, thank you!

C: [high pitched voice] Come on Thundercracker!

[CS: Thundercracker and Skywarp are still back at the beginning of the level, flying around slowly trying to get their bearings.]

O: So- my damn headphones cut out again.

S: Ohh.

C: Are they not working?

O: I can hear you guys it's just it's really, really annoying cuz it's only in one ear.

C: Okay.  Well, if we ever need to solve puzzles using stereo we'll let you know.

O: [laughs] Hey, I didn't say we needed it for recording, I said it's annoying.  Now catch up with me, will you?

C: I don't know how to do this!

O: You’re just a jet!

[SS: Thundercracker continues moving slowly forward.  Starscream turns around and comes towards the other players before using his thrusters to speed off again.]

S: How do you go fast?

O: Well, um-

C: If you hold right- right-click, you move super fast.

S: OH.

[SS: Starscream disappears off into the distance, Skywarp activates his thrusters and proceeds to fly around erratically, and Thundercracker follows shortly afterwards.]

C: Yeah, I know, I wish I would have known that when we were doing Escalation [game mode].

S: I’m good at-

O: [quietly] Oh, this is not the right way.

[OS: Starscream flies into a dead end and turns around to go back the direction he came.]

S: Where are we supposed to go?

O: Over here.

[OS: Starscream heads towards a doorway, transforming and landing on the platform.  Some sort of round machine detaches itself from the wall up ahead.

Skywarp: What is THAT?

Thundercracker: An Autobot probe.  We should avoid it to prevent detection.]

C: Can I shoot it?

[Starscream: Like that puny probe could stop me.  Blast them and get on with it!

CS: Skywarp flies forward in jet mode and shoots the probe, destroying it.]

C: Ha!  What do they mean, ‘avoid it’?

S: Ahh!

[CS: Thundercracker flies by, bouncing off the floor.]

C: You can just blow it up!

S: -up!

O: Sorry guys, once sec. [Owls makes another attempt to get her headphones working.]

C: Sure, let’s take a quick pause.

[SS: All the jets stop, and Thundercracker begins looking around at their surroundings.]

O: You like, cut in.

C: Let's have storytime!  Thundercracker, tell Skywarp a story!

O & S: [laugh]

S: Life is short, and then you die!

C: Holy crap!

A: [laugh]

O: Okay-

C: But we're late millions of years old, built from naturally-occurring gears and levers!

O & S: [laugh]

O: And naturally-occurring thrusters, apparently.  Anyway, let's go, I'm just gonna have to live with this.  That’s annoying.

[SS: Everyone begins moving forward again.]

C: And naturally occur- occurring combustible fuel sources.

S: Ah!

[OS: Starscream flies ahead, and a drone begins draining his health with a blue beam.  Shortly after, it is destroyed by Thundercracker.]

O: Thank you.  Far more polite than Starscream would ever be, but that's fine.

[CS: Skywarp is being targeted by another drone.]

C: Ah!  Ah!  This one’s draining my brain!

O: Where are you?

[Thundercracker: I have never traveled this deeply into Cybertron’s interior before.

Skywarp: [groans] You are as boring as ever, Thundercracker.]

C: Half dead.

[SS: Thundercracker moves slowly ahead leaving the other two behind.  The location marker for their next objective is ticking done off to the right of the screen.]

S: Oh, I think we’re supposed- I think we’re working on a timer?

O: Uh, I don’t think so.

[OS: Starscream takes out the last of the drones.]

S: Ohh~

O: That’s not a timer, that's how close we are to a thing.

S: Oh.

[OS: Starscream flies towards the opening the other two Seekers have disappeared through but transforms before he actually reaches the platform, falling down.]

O: Oh no!  Okay, that was dumb.

[OS: Starscream lands on some convenient pipes and transforms back into jet mode.]

S: Shit, was I not supposed to do the thing I did?

O: I don't know, I'm not there yet!

[SS: Skywarp is standing on a platform off to the left shooting at some moving pods on the other side of the large room he and Thundercracker are in.  The pods are being moved up a wall and into a large door that is opening and closing.]

C: Huh.

S: Or are we supposed to go in there?

C: I have no clue.  Let's do it!

S: [laughs]

[CS: Skywarp jumps up and transforms, attempting to enter while the door is open, but is stopped by an invisible wall.

Skywarp: Hey!  I don’t make a habit out of blowing you up!]

C: Oh nope, apparently that's bad.

[OS: Starscream flies upwards in a jerky motion.]

C: It really bothers me that there's not just like a, ‘fly up’ button.

Note: There is- we just didn’t realize it.  It’s a bit more obvious in Fall of Cybertron, but it is the same button in both games.

O: Right?  It's very annoying.

[OS: Starscream transforms and lands in a hallway, walking over to the nearby door panel and activating it.]

S: Yeah.

S: I'm just gonna be a plane.

A: [laughs]

[SS: The door opens, revealing an Autobot who fires on the party.

Autobot: Decepticons!

The Autobot runs off camera, leaving the Seekers in front of some sort of laser grid that is keeping them from advancing.

Starscream: What is this?  Some kind of Autobot trap?

Thundercracker: It’s an enemy detection barrier.

Skywarp: So it’s a trap!]

O: [snorts]

[CS: Starscream moves back and forth in front of the barrier and Skywarp and Thundercracker fire on the edges of the barrier.]

O: [quietly] Alright… how do we get around this?

[Thundercracker: The power conduits along the floors should direct us to its power source.]

O: I got stuck here last time and then felt like a dummy.

[OS: Skywarp transforms and shoots a glowing spot on the wall the power conduit was leading to, deactivating the barrier.

Starscream: Stupid Autobots.  To think their measly tricks could ever fool Starscream.]

S: Oh, how did you…?

O: He shot something.

C: I just shot- I just shot where the power conduit went.

O: Yeah.

S: Oh.

C: It was this big thing with all-

O: You know, the smart thing.

[SS: Skywarp walks over to the destroyed power conduit, and as he walks away Thundercracker shoots at it.]

C: [laughs]

[Thundercracker: The power core has to be somewhere in this room.]

C: Alright Starscream, what's our mission?

O: Ugh, to kill my headphones with a greasy spoon.

[OS: Starscream walks up to another barrier and uses the scope of his Null Ray to get a better view at the room on the other side.]

O: Uh… we need to kill the power conduit.

S: Oh-

C: Do more power conduit stuff-

[OS: Skywarp shoots at the doorframe in jet mode and Starscream walks away, seeing an open area off to the right that Thundercracker is floating in front of.]

S: Uh…

O: Or maybe we go over here?  Can’t remember.

[OS: Starscream transforms and flies through a narrow hallway, over the same blue energon substance as before.]

C: I don’t know.

[OS: Starscream navigates the narrower hallway and lands on in front of another barrier on the platform at the end.  He transforms and shoots the power conduit visible on the other side, deactivating the barrier.]

O: Aha!

[Starscream: Pathetic machinery.]

O: [snorts]

[SS: Thundercracker follows behind a running Starscream, while still in jet mode.]

O: [laughs] I'm sorry, I just love you guys following along as jets, it's hilarious.

S: [laughs]

[SS: The group exits the hallway into a small room with a health box and an ammo box off to the left.]

O: Uh, who needs health?

S: Uh, I need ammo?

O: Go ahead and take it.

C: I have two things of health.

S: Oh-

C: I’m gonna grab it.

S: Someone take health.

[CS: Thundercracker takes the ammo, and Skywarp grabs the ammo.  They both move over to the ledge Starscream is standing on.  Below, there is a group of 4 Autobots standing next to each other with their backs to the party, listening to a large Zeta Prime hologram in the middle of the room.

Zeta Prime: Autobots, this is Zeta Prime.  Be on high alert!  The Decepticons are planning to re-activate the Energon Bridge.  This would grant them access to an unstable energy source powerful enough to jeopardize the entire planet.  Any Decepticons activity must be reported immediately, and all Decepticons are to be shot on sight!  Zeta Prime out!

OS: Starscream watches the Autobots through his scope until Zeta Prime finishes speaking and then he immediately destroys a few of them before backing away from the ledge to reload his gun.

Starscream: How boring!  I’ve read more entertaining maintenance reports.

Autobot 1: Alert!  Alert!

SS: Thundercracker is shot by the remaining Autobots.]

S: [distressed noises]

[Autobot 2: Focus your fire on that Decepticon!

Starscream: None can resist us!]

C: I guess there are missiles?

[SS: Skywarp and Thundercracker take out the last Autobot.  Skywarp and Starscream begin flying around the room exploring and Skywarp shoots the remaining explosive canisters on the ground.  The hallway leading out of the room is blocked by another barrier.

Skywarp: That was easy!

Thundercracker: The others will likely be tougher.  I suggest we proceed with caution.]

O: Who was actually suggesting caution there?

[Skywarp: My neural circuitry is stinging.  Getting past this thing is impossible!

Starscream: Keep looking you fool.  The answer is here somewhere!]

O: [snorts]

[CS: Skywarp finds a door up near the top of the room that is being held shut by some clamps.  He shoots the clamps and enters the room, where another power conduit is visible on the wall.]

C: So, I guess there’s a door up above?  And I found a conduit.

[CS: Skywarp shoots the conduit and exits the way he came.]

O: Sweet.

S: And I just shot the door that the Autobots were in front of or something?  Or someone just did?  I don’t know.

[OS: Starscream and Thundercracker enter the hallway that was previously blocked.]

C: Well, it is polite to knock.

O: What? [laughs]

C: It's- she shot the door.  So she was knocking.  That's how Transformers knock, right?  With their gun?

[OS: The party enters a room that is divided in half by a drop across the center of the room.  On the other side of the crevice, several Autobots run into view.

Autobot: [shouting]

Skywarp: Rockets!

Starscream: Quickly, get to cover!]

O: I mean, that sounds right.  I don't know why that wouldn't be right.

[OS: Starscream takes several shoots at the opposing Autobots using the Scatter Blaster (shotgun), which isn’t very effective at his current range.

Thundercracker: My scans indicate that door should lead us to the next canyon.]

O: Oh my god, why?

[SS: The group takes out most of the Autobots visible on the other ledge.

Starscream: They fall so easily!

SS: Everyone flies over the gap to reach the other side, where Skywarp and Thundercracker take down the remaining Autobot from the group prior.

Starscream: Let all that see Starscream tremble in fear!]

S: Mmm.

C: The best part about being a jet is infinite ammo.

S: Mmm.

O: I forgot about that, that is pretty nice, right?

C: [laughs]

S: What do you mean infinite- OH!

C & O: [laugh]

C: That was the best! [laughs]

[SS: The group takes out another group of Autobots around the corner.  Thundercracker staying in jet mode to take advantage of the infinite ammo.]

S: That's nice.  I appreciate that.  Ohh~

C: Yeah, somehow I'm still getting hit though.  I'm still down to half health.

[OS: The groups another corner to find a third group of Autobots.  The group fires on them.

Autobot: Launching rockets!

Skywarp: I got another one!]

C: I think it's cuz the missiles come after you if you're in jet mode.

S: [distressed noises]

O: Down here?  Or do we go the other way?

S: Um-

[OS: Starscream flies over to what looks like a hole in the floor and looks at it before turning around and spying some ammo.]

O: No, that’s not the right- BULLETS!

[OS: Starscream runs through the ammo, but doesn’t pick it up.]

O: Maybe?  Why can't I pick it up!?!

C: They aren't flak bullets, are they?

[SS: Activates a console opening the nearby door.]

S: I just opened a door?

[SS: An Autobot charges forward from a small group, activating a glowy blue shield on their frame.

Autobot: DIE!]

S: Oh, whoops, sorry.

C: This is what happens when you don't knock!  People get very angry.

[Autobot: Decepticons!  Seal the door!

CS: The rest of the Autobots run out a doorway behind them and seal the door.  The party takes out the lone Autobot.

Skywarp: Those punks locked us out!

Starscream: Stop whining and find another way in!]

C: So wait, what are we doing here, exactly?

O: Uh, we're trying to turn the space crack bridge back on.

[OS: Starscream walks over to an opening in the floor and jumps down.

Thundercracker: My scans show an energon deposit beneath us.]

C: The space crack bridge?

O: The space crack bridge.

[Starscream: Perfect!  There may be a cave below!]

C: Okay.  Because-

S: It's cave time!  I don’t like caves.

[Skywarp: Where are we?

Starscream: We’re NOT where we NEED to be, Skywarp--so keep moving!

SS: Thundercracker and Skywarp follow Starscream down through the floor and into another underground room in their jet modes.  The underground room is crisscrossed by pipes and flowing energon.  The energeron is significantly closer to the party than in previous rooms because the ceilings are lower.

C: Because we need to get our new Lord and Savior, Megatron, his fix.

S: [laughs]

[Thundercracker: Crude energon is highly volatile, and flying this close to it is very dangerous.  We should proceed with caution.

OS: Starscream transforms and the group flies forward]

O: No, no, no, no, no, not Lord and Savior, Starscream's new squeeze.

C: Right.

O: [laughs]

[Skywarp: Tighten your logic circuits, would you Thundercracker?  It can’t be THAT bad.]

C: This is-

S: His new boy toy.

C: -just one big, complicated booty call for Starscream?

O & S: [laugh]

O: YUP!  The last level was a drug run, this is a booty call!

A: [laughs]

[SS: The party reaches an area where they can go up.  Starscream activates his thrusters and bumps into the ceiling before maneuvering his way out.  Skywarp zips past flying erratically, as Thundercracker brings up the rear flying slowly.]

C: Oh my gosh, I’m flying drunk!

O: [laughs] So you’re Skywarp, got it.

C: It’s hard to fly when you move fast!

[CS: Skywarp continues to fly erratically.]

S: [laughs]

O: That’s why you do it in little bursts!

C: I'm sure there's an innuendo in there somewhere.

[CS: Starscream flies past, USING HIS THRUSTERS CORRECTLY.]

O: [screechy voice] “Some of us know how to use our thrusters, Skywarp!”

C: [laughs]

S: I-

O: Sound about right?

[OS: Thundercracker bumps into Starscream.]

C: I'm sorry, boss! [laughs]  Oh no.  Boss, Thundercracker is lost.

O: [laughs]

[SS: Thundercracker is flying in the middle of a room, turning around slowly.  Skywarp zooms over.]

S: [laughs] Yes, I am where- shoot

C: Things got too steamy for ‘em.

[OS: Starscream is in a different location than the other two, shooting at a bunch of turrets and Autobots.]

S: Where are you- where the fuck are we supposed to be going?

C: Through the-

O: Uh, just through the cave, that’s all I got.

C: Through the waterfall.

S: Oh.

[SS: Thundercracker moves down lower and enters a cave behind the waterfall.  Skywarp flies ahead of him.]

C: You, no, you wanna go down.  There you go.

S: Yes, I- I did see that but it- when you guys are going- when I can see your names through the walls it's not very... cohesive for me, okay?

[OS: Starscream is continuing to shoot Autobots and turrets.]

C: Makes sense.

S: Sorry, I am NOT drunk flying.

[CS: Skywarp activates his thrusters and catches up with Starscream, turning to shoot at the remaining turrets.]

C: [laughs] Sure, sure.

[Skywarp: No hard feelings, right?

SS: Thundercracker catches up with the other two and joins in the fray.]

S: Ah, fuck.

[OS: With the Autobots vanquished, Starscream lands and transforms.]

O: Oh, I desperately want ammo, I'm like completely out [of non-jet ammo]. [laughs] I can't shoot worth shit as a jet, apparently.

O: Also, I need health.

S: There's ammo here, and heals.

[OS: Starscream runs over to a health chest, destroying it and grabbing the health.]

O: Okay, where’s the am-

[OS: Starscream turns and sees the ammo box, running over and destroying it as well.]

O: Oh, there’s the ammo.  Oh sweet god, I have sharp- uh, I have a sniper rifle shit again, okay.

[Starscream: We’re getting close!  The next entrance is just on the far side of this canyon.

A cinematic starts, as the party enters a large empty area, and a large ship with a whole bunch of Autobots inside drops down from above.]

S: Oh, goody.

C: How does Starscream know that?

O: Scans.  Bullshit.  It's a very complicated booty call, honey.

S: I don't know, he worked here?

C: [laughs]

O: I don’t think he did…

C: It’s like his old office?

[The large ship generates some sort of barrier to keep the party from advancing, and then begins firing mortars from several large cannons on it’s topside.]

O: [laughs before continuing in a screechy voice]  “This’ll show them for kicking me out!  Sleeping with the boss, HA!”

C: “Should have installed a coffee machine!”

[OS: The screen reads, “New Objective: Destroy the shield generator.

Thundercracker: The Autobot ship is generating an energy shield over the entrance!

Starscream: I can see that for myself, Thundercracker.  Enough babbling--destroy it!

Thundercracker: Target the mortars first!

CS: Skywarp flies over to the drop ship and transforms, hitting the mortars with his physical attack before swapping to his guns.]

S: [sighs]

[Skywarp: This thing is as crazy as I am!]

O: [snorts]

[Starscream: Just blast it!  It breaks, like everything else!

SS: Thundercracker is shooting at the mortars, swapping targets as they are destroyed.]

C: I think I did this in Super Star Wars once.

O: [laughs] I mean, probably?

[OS: Starscream is shooting at the mortars.  Autobots are seen flying in close proximity in the background as well as the remaining mortar guns shooting rounds up into the air that disperse and rain down.]

C: What is shooting at us!?

O: Uh, probably the Autobots.

S: Yeah.

[SS: Thundercracker destroys another mortar.]

S: The ship?

O: I tried to take out the motors- the mortars I could see.

[Starscream: Excellent!  Now, target the Aerialbots!

Skywarp: I’ll show them some REAL flying!

CS: Skywarp flies into a group of enemy Autobots, destroying a target, but his health dropping below 1 bar, before he flies out of range.]

S: Ah.  Oh, sorry.

[OS: Starscream is destroying enemy Autobots, when the downed ally icon appears off to his right.]

C: Oh no, I'm down.

[Skywarp: Here comes another wave!

OS: Starscream transforms into bot mode and begins to fall before transforming back into vehicle mode.]

O: Oh shit!  Why did I do that!?

S: Oh, hold on.  Uh…

[SS: Thundercracker flies over to Skywarp and begins to revive him.  Several Autobots are hovering around above Skywarp, and Thundercracker begins to take fire.]

S: I'm holding ‘E’ to revive!

C: Thank you.  I'm very bad at staying alive in the air.

[OS: Skywarp is revived and the whole party resumes firing on the Autobots.]

S: So am I?

[OS: Starscream takes heavy damage.]

O: Oh my god!!!

[SS: Thundercracker goes down.]

S: Sorry, I'm out.

C: Alright, I'll come get you.

[CS: Skywarp flies towards Thundercracker but overshoots and has to stop and turn around.]

C: Oh no, there’s too many of them!

[CS: Skywarp is still trying to maneuver his way over to Thundercracker, but several Autobots are firing on him at the same time.]

C: There’s too many, I can’t revive you!

[CS: Another downed ally icon appears to Skywarp’s left.]

O: I’m dead too.

C: No, no, why!?

S: [snickers]

C: THERE’S TOO MANY!

[OS: The Mission Failed screen appears.]

O: Goodbye cruel world. [sighs]

S: Well, hopefully, it's not gonna toss us too far back from where we were?

[OS: Owls selects, “Restart from Last Checkpoint”.]

O: I think we spawn right before there, because I kept dying there, uh, on- when on my one player playthrough.

[OS: The screen reads, “New Objective: Find the Hidden Underground Entrance.”

Starscream: We’re getting close!  The next entrance is just on the far side of this canyon.

The same cinematic from before starts, with the drop ship dropping down into the canyon from above, generating the shield, attacking the party with mortar rounds, and releasing Aerialbots to attack the Seekers.]

C: This part is hard!

O: Yeah!  I know, it sucks!

C: Like, there’s no negotiating.

O: And you have to be in the air, because like, landing on the plane does not- or wha- landing on the ship doesn't make things ton easier for ya.

C: I think we're gonna have to focus on taking out the little guys.

O: Well, we need to take out the cannons [mortars] too - otherwise you'll really get fucked over.

C: Is there a finite amount of guys though?

O: I think so?  But I don't remember.

[OS: The screen reads, “New Objective: Destroy the shield generator.]

C: Alright, well I guess we'll rush the cannons then.

[Thundercracker: The Autobot ship is generating an energy shield over the entrance!

Starscream: I can see that for myself, Thundercracker.  Enough babbling--destroy it!

OS: The party moves forward and begins shooting at the mortars.]

O: Either that, or if you guys want to focus on the little ones I’ll focus on the cannons?  Either works.

[Thundercracker: Target the mortars first!]

Skywarp: This thing is as crazy as I am!

C: Alright, I'm gonna swap over to just focusing on the little guys now.

[CS: Skywarp zips off towards the back of the ship.]

C: There they are, they're coming out of the back of the ship.

[Starscream: Excellent!  Now, target the Aerialbots!

Skywarp: I’ll show them some REAL flying!]

Skywarp: Here comes another wave!

OS: Starscream continues shooting the mortars.  A downed ally icon appears to his left.]

S: Ah, well, I’m out.

[OS: Starscream transforms into robot mode, dropping down before transforming back into vehicle mode and zipping towards Thundercracker.]

C: Oh crap.

S: Sorry.

C: I can't find you.

S: I am towards the rear of the ship.

[OS: Starscream overshoots Thundercracker and has to turn around, while taking heavy fire from the multiple Autobots hovering over Thundercracker.]

O: Oh dammit!

S: You’re out too?

O: No, not yet yet.

O: Ugh, I’m try-

C: I- there- there you are.

O: Now I am.

C: Nooo!

[CS: Skywarp is downed and the Mission Failed screen displays briefly, before loading at the checkpoint again.]

O: Try to stay more towards the middle, because it's really, really hard when like, everybody's spread out everywhere?

[CS: The screen reads, “New Objective: Find the Hidden Underground Entrance.”

Starscream: We’re getting close!  The next entrance is just on the far side of this canyon.]

C: Um, they spawn in at the rear of the ship and they're sitting ducks while they run out.  So I'm still going to stay in the rear.

O: That's fine.

[CS: The same cinematic from before starts, but is skipped.  The screen reads, “New Objective: Destroy the shield generator.”]

O: Yes, can we-? There we go. [laughs] I was like, do we need to watch this again?  The answer is no.

C: But it’s so pretty!

[Thundercracker: The Autobot ship is generating an energy shield over the entrance!

Starscream: I can see that for myself, Thundercracker.  Enough babbling--destroy it!

Skywarp: Target the mortars first!

CS: The party flies in and all target the mortars, taking out three of them in rapid succession.

Skywarp: This thing is as crazy as I am!

Starscream: Just blast it!  It breaks, like everything else!

OS: Starscream and Thundercracker continue to attack the mortars.  Starscream is fired on by Aerialbots and his health drops to under 1 bar before he flies out of range.]

O: [quietly] Godammit.

[Starscream: Excellent!  Now, target the Aerialbots!

CS: Skywarp is at the rear of the ship shooting Aerialbots as they run out of the ship, before they’re able to transform into vehicle mode.

Skywarp: I’ll show them some REAL flying!

OS: Starscream transforms and lands on the ship, taking out one of the Aerialbots with his Null Ray.  He’s then fired on and transforms and flies off.

Thundercracker: Here comes another wave!]

O: Oh, dammit!

[Starscream: The blast doors are open!  Quickly!]

S: Uh…

[SS: Thundercracker hovers around the front of the dropship looking around.]

S: So, I’m-

[Skywarp: Watch out for those rocket snipers!

SS: A downed ally icon appears in the distance.]

O:  Dammit!  Dammit!  I’m down.

S: Oh shit.

C: Alright.

[Starscream: Enough of this nonsense!  We'll bring this annoyance down from the INSIDE.  Fly in and target its power core!

CS: Skywarp and Starscream take out an Aerialbot and Skywarp flies over to the downed Starscream.]

C: You can shoot while you’re down, so try and cover for me.

O: [quietly] If I can find them…

[CS: Starscream sort of scoots away from Thundercracker and Skywarp while firing on some of the Aerialbots still on the drop ship.]

C: Hey!  No, don't move away from us!

[OS: Skywarp revives Starscream.]

C: There we go.

O: [screechy voice] I LIVE!

[OS: The down ally icon appears on the left side of the screen.]

S: I'm out.  Shit.

[CS: Skywarp turns around and flies back over to where Starscream is reviving Thundercracker.

Starscream: None can resist us!  For glory!]

C: [laughs] For glory!

O: For getting my ass kicked.

S: [laughs]

[CS: Skywarp flies over to the opened portion of the drop ship and continues shooting at the Autobots inside.]

O: Okay, there we go.

S: Thank you. Oh!  Apparently I was not by the rear of the ship, I was by the front!

C: I think the ship just opened up.

O: Yeah.

[SS: Thundercracker enters the ship behind Skywarp as they both transform into robot mode.  Thundercracker picks up some health while Skywarp fires on Autobots.]

C: Alright, there’s health on my right, or my left, rather.

O: There's some on each, I'm gonna take this one.

C: I have two bars so I'm probably good for now.

[Autobot: Close the blast doors, and seal the ship!  We’ll trap them inside!]

Skywarp: Trap us?

Thundercracker: Orders, Starscream?

Starscream: Hahahaha!  Those idiots locked in here with their power core!  Plant a detpack on it!

OS: Starscream runs around shooting at Autobots before going down.]

O: Ugh!  I'm down, help.

S: Oh shi- shoot.

[CS: Thundercracker is off to the side reviving Starscream.  Skywarp chases down Autobots with a combination of gunfire and melee attacks, before going down as well.]

C: Ah, I'm down as well.

S: Uh, where are you?  Oh.

O: ARGH!

S: How am I not-

[SS: Thundercracker walks over to Skywarp and begins to revive him.  Another downed ally icon appears on the right hand side of the screen.]

O: I’m down again.

[SS: Thundercracker continues to try and revive Skywarp but also goes down when an Autobot walks up and shoots him at point blank range.]

S: Well damn it, so am I.

O: At least we start from here [after the ship has opened up].

S: Well, I mean we’re…

O: Oh fucking rockets!

S: Oh, the audio seems like it’s gone for me?

C: Oh, you lost audio?

S: I don’t know why, but I can’t hear the game anymore-

O: Did you accidentally turn it down?

S: -or you guys.

[Autobot: Close the blast doors, and seal the ship!  We’ll trap them inside!]

C: We can’t get into the ship anymore!

S: All my stuff is...uh, muted?  Why is my stuff muted?

[The video disappears and some white text is visible on a black background.]

Note (from sound editor, which is also Chezni):

Unfortunately at this point, we had a SNAFU with Specs' audio and had to restart the game.

Due to the restart, Specs' audio and footage became unusable due to a spike in her game volume that she corrects in about 16 minutes.

Don't worry!  You can still see and hear her in Owls' and Chezni's footage until the correction, which will be used until then.

Sorry for the interruption!

[OS: The game loads back at the checkpoint before the battle with the drop ship started.  The screen reads, “New Objective: Find the Hidden Underground Entrance.”  On the lower left the text, “Chezni has joined the game,” and “Specspectacle has joined the game,” is visible.]

O: [singing]  Dada dat dat dat dada da da.

S: If we don’t- mm.

C: Ah, hey, we’re back!

[Starscream: We’re getting close!  The next entrance is just on the far side of this canyon.

The same cinematic from before starts, but is skipped.  The screen reads, “New Objective: Destroy the shield generator.”]

C: Oh no!  We gotta do this again.

S: Ah, pfft.

[Thundercracker: The Autobot ship is generating an energy shield over the entrance!

Starscream: I can see that for myself, Thundercracker.  Enough babbling--destroy it!

Thundercracker: Target the mortars first!

OS: The screen reads, “New Objective: Destroy the shield generator.  The party flies forward and attacks the mortars.]

Skywarp: This thing is as crazy as I am!

Starscream: Just blast it!  It breaks, like everything else!]

S: Oh.

[Starscream: Excellent!  Now, target the Aerialbots!

Skywarp: I’ll show them some REAL flying!

CS: Skywarp continues to fly around and shoot the mortars before swapping to the Aerialbots.  A downed ally icon appears on the lower left of the screen.]

S: Oh.  Sorry, I’m out guys.

C: No worries.  I’m always amazed at the fact that while you’re flying, at like, light speed the enemies still hit you.

[Skywarp: Here comes another wave!]

S: Uh…

C: I’m sorry, I can’t, there was too much fire power.

O: Oh!

[OS: Starscream flies over to Thundercracker but is taken out along with Skywarp and the Mission Failed screen appears.]

O: I’m dead too.

S: So am I.

O: Oh my god, I hate this checkpoint!

[OS: Owls selects, “Restart from Last Checkpoint”.]

O: I hate this level, I hate this-

C: Shake off the rust.

[The screen reads, “New Objective: Find the hidden underground entrance.”]

O: Uh, no, there is no rust!  This part just sucks, it sucked it one player!

C: Shake off the rust!

[Starscream: We’re getting close!  The next entrance is just on the far side of this canyon.]

O: OH MY GOD, you’re a jerk.

C: The space rust.  What's the super rust called?

[OS: The same cinematic from before starts, but is skipped.  The screen reads, “New Objective: Destroy the shield generator.”]

O: Cosmic rust, dear?

C: Yeah, shake off the cosmic rust!

O: [screechy voice] “Only if you're Megatron!”

[CS: The party flies forward and attacks the mortars.

Thundercracker: The Autobot ship is generating an energy shield over the entrance!

Starscream: I can see that for myself, Thundercracker.  Enough babbling--destroy it!

Skywarp: Target the mortars first!]

C: Cosmic rust, it's coarse, and rough...

O: And gets everywhere.

C & O: [laugh]

[Skywarp: This thing is as crazy as I am!

Starscream: Just blast it!  It breaks, like everything else!

CS: Skywarp swaps over to attacking the Aerialbots.]

O: Oh my god!  Go away!

[Starscream: Excellent!  Now, target the Aerialbots!

Skywarp: I’ll show them some REAL flying!]

C: Oh my gosh, I'm definitely gonna die here.

[OS: Starscream continues to shoot at Aerialbots.]

S: Oh, I'm out, sorry guys.  I’m in the worst spot.

[OS: Starscream transforms into bot mode, dropping down and grabbing some energon before transforming back into vehicle mode and flying over to Thundercracker… who is awkwardly hanging in the air nose first into the drop ship.  The area is slanted, so it’s more difficult to maneuver around, but Starscream manages to get underneath him and revives him, while taking fire from nearby Aerialbots.]

C: That is a pretty bad spot!

S: [laughs]

C: I don't think I can…

S: [continues laughing even harder]

C: Like, those guys are just right there.

S: Oh.

O: Oh my god!

[Thundercracker: More reinforcements?

OS: Starscream flies off to get out of firing range of the Aerialbots, but another downed ally icon appears behind him and he turns around midair.]

O: I can't get everyone!

S: [laughs]

C: Well, you've got 700 seconds for me.

[OS: Starscream flies over to Skywarp and revives him.  Yet another downed ally icon appears to the left.]

O: Oh my god, GUYS!!

S: [continues to laugh harder]

[OS: Starscream zips over to Thundercracker and revives him, while already on low health and taking even more fire from Aerialbots.]

O: I need you to not!  I’m gonna die!

[Starscream: The blast doors are open!  Quickly!

Skywarp: Watch out for those rocket snipers!]

C: We did it!  We did it!

[Starscream: Enough of this nonsense!  We'll bring this annoyance down from the INSIDE.  Fly in and target its power core!]

S: Mm-mm.

[CS: Skywarp flies into the drop ship, transforming into robot mode and shooting at the Autobots inside.]

C: Oh my goodness.

S: Shit, shit!

[Autobot: Close the blast doors, and seal the ship!  We’ll trap them inside!]

O: I am inside, I cannot help.

S: Um.

[Skywarp: Trap us?

Thundercracker: Orders, Starscream?

CS: Thundercracker returns to jet mode.]

S: Shi- uh.

O: Where are you?

C: Where are you are you, Specs?

[CS: Skywarp turns around and sees that the door he and Starscream had entered through is no longer open.

Starscream: Hahahaha!  Those idiots locked in here with their power core!  Plant a detpack on it!]

S: [laughs]

O: If you're outside, we can't help, we’re stuck inside!

S: I’m outside!

C: Oh my god.

O: Of course you are!

S: [laughs] I’m sorry!

O: Oh well, at least we got the stupid door open, right?

C: That’s true.

S: Uh.

C: You're good- don't worry Skywarp- er, Thundercracker, you're completely safe out there!

O & S: [laugh]

C: No harm will come to you!

S: [laughs]

[CS: Starscream and Skywarp continue to maneuver around inside the ship taking out Autobots.  Skywarp goes down, while at the same time another downed ally icon appears offscreen to his left.]

C: Oh gosh, I’m down.

S: So am I, sorry.

O: Oh my god.

S: [laughs]

[CS: Skywarp takes out an Autobot while downed, and Starscream runs over and begins to revive him.]

C: Please save your poor little jet.

S: [laughs]

[CS: Skywarp is revived, he then transforms and follows Starscream into another section of the ship.]

O: You're so tiny and adorable.

[CS: Skywarp fires on yet more Autobots.]

O: [laughs] Seriously, you’re like a little itty bitty little jet when I’m in uh, robot mode, it’s great.

S: I blew up.

[CS: Skywarp is in a fire fight with an Autobot when the screen suddenly goes dark and the Mission Failed screen appears.]

C: Wait, what!?!

O: Well, she was outside!  She was outside and she was- and we couldn't get to her.

[OS: Owls selects, “Restart from Last Checkpoint”.]

S: [laughs]

Note: Apparently, there was lone Decepticon still outside that killed poor Thundercracker in cold blood, unfortunately, Specs footage was still unusable at this point, hence no visual.

[OS: The screen reads, “New Objective: Destroy the shield generator.”]

S: Sorry.

[Starscream: The blast doors are open!  Quickly!

Skywarp: Watch out for those rocket snipers!]

C: But how!?  What hurt you?

White text is overlaid on top of the screen: *Specs makes weird noises because her ears are starting to hurt…*

[Starscream: Enough of this nonsense!  We'll bring this annoyance down from the INSIDE.  Fly in and target its power core!]]

S: Mm.

C: Alright I got-

S: I’m inside now!

C: Hooray!

[Autobot: Close the blast doors, and seal the ship!  We’ll trap them inside!

OS: Starscream has entered the ship and transformed, taking out an Autobot with the Null Ray.  A down ally icon appears to his left.]

S: But I’m also dead!

C: Uh, un-hooray.

[OS: Starscream makes his way over to Thundercracker.

Skywarp: Trap us?

Thundercracker: Orders, Starscream?

Starscream: Hahahaha!  Those idiots locked in here with their power core!  Plant a detpack on it!

CS: Skywarp walks over to the power core and plants an explosive on it.]

S: Ah shoot.  Gosh darnit, who am I supposed to- gah!  I don’t like you.

[Autobot Ship: Warning!  Warning!  Warning!

The dropship begins to come to pieces around the party.

The screen reads, “New Objective: Escape the Autobot Dropship.]

S: I’m down.

[CS: Skywarp walks over to the downed Thundercracker.]

C: I got ya.

[Starscream: Unbelievable!  These Autobots are dumber than Skywarp!]

S: Thank you.

[Thundercracker: Perhaps, Starscream, but have you considered an escape route for US?]

S: Ah.

[Starscream: Try the upper deck!  Hurry!

OS: Thundercracker is revived, and Starscream transforms into jet mode and flies up to the second level of the drop ship.]

S: Uh.

C: I think we need to- yeah, go up.

[OS: The doorway in front of the party is sealed.

Skywarp: They sealed it off!]

S: Yeah, yeah, I kind of figured.

[OS: The front part of the ship falls away, and the part transforms into jet mode to make their exit.

Starscream: Now’s our chance!  Fly through the hole!]

O: [snorts]

C: No comment.

O: [laughs]

C: No comment.

[Skywarp: Dumber than Skywarp?  I’ll show YOU dumb, Starscream!

Starscream: You always do.

The screen reads, “New Objective: Continue your search for the underground.”

OS: The party flies forward, transforming and landing on the platform the shield generator was blocking.  Starscream runs forward and smashes an ammo chest before turning around and seeing some grenades in the corner.]

O: Okay, we've got ammo, grenades…

S: Uh…

O: Where's- where's- there's a Chezni.

[CS: Skywarp flies up and lands on the platform Starscream and Thundercracker are already on.]

O: You're always lagging behind Skywarp.

C: You know what?!

O: [laughs]

C: You know what?!

[CS: Skywarp starts running away from Starscream.]

C: ...I don’t know what.

[OS: Starscream chases after Skywarp.]

O: What are you- what are you gonna do?  You gonna run away?  We are the only two that will have you, and you know it!

C: [laughs]

O: Get back here Skywarp!

[CS: The party runs into a hallway, a shield chest is visible off to their right.]

O: [laughs] Does anyone need heal-

S: Uh, is that heals?

O: Yes.

S: Cuz I could use-

O: Go ahead.

C: It’s a shield not heals.

O: Well, it’ll still help.

S: Thank you.

O: I also thought it fully healed you, but perhaps I’m wrong.

[CS: A cinematic plays of the Seekers running into a room where a creepy looking Autobot is standing, before it jumps off the platform, disappearing in a flash of electricity.]

S: Oh!

O: What is that?  Oh right, I remember this.

C: That's not a real transformer.

[Skywarp: Did you see that?

Thundercracker: You mean that creepy looking that that just jumped over the side?

Skywarp: Yah.

Thundercracker: Nope.  I didn’t see anything.

Starscream: I should’ve left you two on the station.]

O: Uh, I’m gonna take this unless you guys want something- want it.

[OS: Starscream walks over to a Plasma Cannon (Charge) and swaps out his Scattershot for it.]

O: I dunno if I’ll like it, but we’ll see.

[Skywarp: Now this is some serious bang for our buck!]

S: Are we jumping?

C: What is- oh, nothing.

O: Yup.

[OS: Starscream walks over to the ledge and jumps down.]

C: We’re jets!  Jets don't jump, St- Thundercracker, they fly!

O: They fall with style! [laughs]

[OS: Starscream walks into a dark room, and the screen shakes.]

S: Wahh!

C: With- yeah, we don’t fall, we fly with style!

[OS: Starscream and Thundercracker are looking around the room.

Skywarp: I think I saw something.

Thundercracker: You think you saw what?

Starscream: SILENCE!  It could be an Autobot cloaker--keep your optics sharp!

CS: Skywarp walks over to an ammo chest before transforming and zipping over to a health chest and running into the energon inside..]

C: There's some ammo over here if anyone needs it.

O: There's a scatter blaster over here?

S: Uh…

C: I already have a scatter blaster.  It's horrible.

[OS: Starscream and Thundercracker are attempting to target one of the cloakers as it becoming visible when charging it’s attack.  Starscream tries to use the Plasma Cannon and charges it up, but the Cloaker disappears again.]

O: Where are they?

[OS: The Plasma Cannon goes off automatically, not hitting anything.]

O: Ugh.

S: Ohh~

[OS: A cloaker shoots Starscream from above.]

O: What the fuck!?  Right…

S: There's-

[CS: Skywarp flies around the room in jet mode, finally seeing one of the cloakers charge up an attack and shoot.]

C: Oh, it's invisible!

S: Yes, it's invisible, man!  Thank you.

C: You got to look for the shimmers.

O: Yeah, I need- oh, where was that other gun?  I need it. [snorts] This is bad.

[CS: Skywarp continues flying around, targeting cloakers with his jet mode’s machine guns when he spots them.  Starscream and Thundercracker are running around on the ground.]

S: Um.

[CS: Skywarp tries to shoot a cloaker but it runs away from him and disappears.]

C: Ah man, they're fast!

O: Ugh.

[OS: Starscream runs around the room trying to shoot things with the Scatter Blaster, with limited success.]

S: God, it’s a fast sucker!

O: It really is.

[OS: Starscream turns into vehicle mode briefly to destroy a cloaker with his machine guns before returning to bot mode.

Starscream: I’m ready to lead!

OS: A downed ally icon appears to the right.]

S: I'm out, sorry!  God, there’s so many of them!

C: Yeah, there's like, a ton all of a sudden.

[OS: Skywarp attempts to revive Thundercracker but is unable because Thundercracker is in vehicle mode and awkwardly angled away from a platform behind him.  Starscream transforms into jet mode and is able to begin reviving Thundercracker.]

O: I got her.

S: Thank you.

[OS: Skywarp runs out from underneath Thundercracker.  The party continues fighting the cloaked Autobots.]

C: I can't move.  I was like, stuck underneath her.

S: Mm.

C: When they- when they attack they charge up a ball of light.

O: Yeah, that's how I've been aiming at ‘em.

[OS: The party takes out the last of the cloakers.

Starscream: Hahaha!  Feel the power of my wrath!  Now, get the power back online so we can move on!]

S: Uh.

O: I didn't realize I could swap weapons [in vehicle mode].  I mean, I kind of figured it out earlier but thank god, I hate machine guns.

[Starscream: Get moving, Decepticons.  We must be getting close.]

S: Is there like-

O: Any health or ammo left in here?

C: I didn’t see any.

[CS: Skywarp flies around the room a bit before zipping through a door into the next room over.  The room is narrow with two openings to a larger area that is swarming with Autobots on a platform in the middle of the area.  There is a gun on the ground in front of the party.

Thundercracker: There it is.  The entrance to the underground.

Starscream: Another shield generator?!  These Autobots are getting on my nerves.]

O: I don’t need- there we go.

S: There’s a Null Ray scope?

O: Oh, I already have one, I can’t pick up another one.

[The screen reads, “New Objective: Deactivate the forcefield.”

Starscream: Bring down those shields!]

C: Uh, I’ll take the Null Ray scope.

[CS: Skywarp walks over and picked up the Null Ray, dropping his Scatter Blaster.]

O: It a sniper rifle.

S: Oh.  Um.  Well, nuts, I’m out!

[OS: Starscream is sniping Autobots when the downed ally icon appears to his right.]

S: Sorry, I’m down.

C: It’s fine, uh, I’ll cover.

[OS: Starscream walks over to Thundercracker and revives him.  Lines coming from the Autobots across the gap show that a large number of them are equipped with sniper rifles, explaining why Thundercracker died so quickly.]

S: Okay, mmm.

[OS: Starscream gets back behind cover and Thundercracker transforms and flies out of the small room the party is in, before being taken out almost immediately.]

S: Mmm, I'm out again.

[OS: Starscream transforms and flies over to Thundercracker to try and revive him.]

O: You need to not fly in here! [laughs]

[OS: Starscream also begins taking heavy fire from the enemy snipers.]

O: Dammit.

C: Shoot.

[OS: Starscream goes down and Thundercracker explodes.]

S: Sorry.

C: No, it's a fine.

[CS: The mission failed screen comes up briefly before restarting at the checkpoint in the room with the Null Ray.  The screen reads, “New Objective: Deactivate the forcefield,” upon loading.

Thundercracker: There it is.  The entrance to the underground.

C: Skywarp suddenly became Italian, “It's a fine!”

[Starscream: Another shield generator?!  These Autobots are getting on my nerves.  Bring down those shields!

CS: Skywarp transforms and enters the large room, flying around the edges, but inevitably takes heavy fire from the enemy snipers.]

S: Umm…oh, jesus- ugh.

[CS: Skywarp is down to 1 bar of health.  The down ally icon appears in the distance.]

S: Shit.  Well, I'm dead again.

[CS: Skywarp lands on a platform and transforms, heading towards a health chest.]

O: Chezni, do you have her?

C: Ah- I’m- um, no. [laughs]

[CS: Skywarp turns away from the chest and transforms, flying over to where Thundercracker is floating.]

O: Uhh…

S: Well, I’m-

C: I’ve got her now, but I’m probably gonna die.

[CS: Skywarp begins reviving Thundercracker but he quickly goes down too.]

C: Yeah, I died trying to do it.

[CS: Thundercracker explodes, and the “Mission Failed,” screen appears.]

S: Sorry.

C: Ah, that's alright.  So that part is probably better if we all stay in that enclosed area.

S: Okay, and then just snipe?

O: YES.

C: Ah, more or less.

[OS: Owls selects, “Restart From Last Checkpoint.”  The screen reads, “New Objective: Deactivate the forcefield,” upon loading.

Thundercracker: There it is.  The entrance to the underground.

Starscream: Another shield generator?!  These Autobots are getting on my nerves.  Bring down those shields!

OS: Starscream snipes 4 Autobots before ducking behind cover to reload.

Starscream: Ahahaha!  For glory!

CS: Skywarp snipes 3 Autobots before looking around at the lessened quantity of Autobots...]

C: I think we're good.  Maybe.

[CS: ...And is then shot at by yet more Autobots.]

C: Ah, I spoke too soon!

[OS: Starscream takes out two targets but the next two are shot by Skywarp.  He then tries to shoot another Autobot higher up on the middle area but misses, needing to reload again.]

O: [quietly] Come on.

S: Ohh~

C: Is that all of them?

O: Almost.

[OS: Starscream takes out the Autobot he previously missed.]

S: Mmm.

[CS: Skywarp transforms and flys over to the middle platform, taking out another Autobot.]

O: At the very least I think it’s most of them.

[OS: Starscream transforms in midair, and uses his energon mace on the enemy below as he’s falling, but doesn’t kill the Autobot.  The Autobot backs up and begins firing on Starscream, dropping him to 1 bar of health]

O: Dammit!

[OS: Starscream attempts to shoot the Autobot with his Null Ray but misses.  He then transforms into vehicle mode and takes him out with his machine gun.]

C: Ah, I’m down.

[OS: Starscream flies over to Skywarp, transforming and beginning to revive him.]

O: I am NOT gonna live through this.

S: Mmm.

[CS: Skywarp is revived and he hops back up.]

C: Thank you.

O: There you go.

S: Mmm.

O: Uhh, you okay?

Note: Keep in mind that Specs can barely hear us, or quite frankly herself, because her game volume is so loud at this point.

C: [Nasally voice] Starscream you're my hero.

[CS: Skywarp dodges fire from an enemy Autobot before running over and taking him out with his physical attack.]

O: [laughs] Now THAT seems like how they- the ways they would tease each other.

[CS: Skywarp uses one of his special moves that allows him to begin spinning the upper potion of his body around in a circle while holding his energon mace and takes out an Autobot.]

S: Mmm.

O: Specs, what’s wrong?

[OS: Starscream takes out an Autobot with the Null Ray, and when he exits the scope mode, Thundercracker is right next to him in vehicle mode.]

C: Yeah, I- where is Specs, actually?

O: She’s with me.

S: I'm right here.

C: Ohh, gosh darn-!

[OS: Starscream continues to snipe Autobots.  Skywarp goes down in front of him.]

C: I’m down again.

S: Mmm.

[OS: Starscream runs over and revives Skywarp.]

S: Ahh.

[Skywarp: The battery casing is opening.]

S: Ahh, okay...

C: This is quite chaotic!

O: A little bit, yeah.

S: No duh!

[OS: Starscream is running low on Null Ray ammo, and not seeing any immediate Autobots runs out from underneath the platform he was under, getting fired on from above immediately.]

O: Oh come on!

C: Come on Decepticons!

[Thundercracker: The shield batteries are exposed.  If we destroy them, we can lower the shield.

OS: Starscream is still under the platform, having swapped over to his Scatter Blaster and trying to take out some nearby Aerialbots (it’s not working terribly well).]

C: Are you... mice bots or are you car bots?!

[OS: The screen reads, “New Objective: Destroy the armor plating.”]

S: We’re fighting planes!

O: Uh, we’re jets? [laughs] We’re fighting jets!

S: I'm out of- shit.

[CS: The party continues fighting the Aerialbots.]

S: Mmm.  Mm.  Mmm.

O: [laughs] I’m sorry!  You're making very, very, many noises though.

[CS: The party takes out the remaining Autobots.  Skywarp flies over to the platform the other two Seekers are on/nearby and heals himself with a nearby health chest.

Starscream: Look out for those sentries, you bumbling idiots!]

C: These are- these are Specs’ concentrating noises.

S: [laughs]

O: [laughs] Is that what we’re calling it?

C: These are Specs’ magic words, do not steal them!

O: [laughs]

[OS: The party is able to destroy the plating on the giant door that was blocked by the shield generator.]

S: I can’t hear you guys very well!

O: [laughs] These are Specs’ magic words, do not steal them!

[OS: The screen reads, “New Objective: Re-route power to the energon bridge.”

The large round door in front of the party opens up and bridge forms from the main platform over to the door.  Starscream flies through the door, and the party enters was looks like a dilapidated tunnel with a bunch of piping and equipment scattered throughout.

Starscream: Move, Decepticons.  Into the tunnels!  We have a Bridge to activate!]

C: Well, whatever they were, seemed like it worked.

S: What?  I can barely hear you guys.

C: Really?

Skywarp: This place gives me the creeps.

Starscream: These tunnels were decommissioned long ago.  We’ll have to activate the power terminals to get the station back online.]

S: Yeah, the game is overpowering everything for me.

C: Did you- is it-

S: OHH!  Because it [the volume] went up to like 50 and I didn't realize it.

C & O: [laugh]

O: All we-

C: That would explain SO MUCH RIGHT NOW!

S: [laughs]

O: We just kept hearing you make noises and I kept asking you what was wrong, and I wasn’t getting a response, and I was like, “Okay…”

A: [laugh]

C: Like, we kept- we kept commenting, we were being like, “Oh hey Specs, how are you?” Like- like no response.

S: [laughs]

[SS: The party moves forward, further into the tunnels.

Skywarp: Incoming!  Take cover!  Wait?!  That’s not Autobot weaponry?!

Thundercracker: Interesting.  I’ve never seen these life forms before.]

C: That’s hilarious.

S: [laughs harder]

[Starscream: Who cares--if they get in my way, BLAST THEM!]

S: But I got things done!  It got- I was helpful, I was useful.

O: Yes!  Yes!

C: True, you died fewer times than I did.

O: Chezni died twice.

C: That’s pretty awesome.

O: If anyone should be ashamed of themselves it should be Chezni.

C: Yup.

O: I don't know what blowing these up does?

[CS: Starscream shoots an object that explodes near Skywarp.]

S: Oh~

C: You're a Decepticon, you love blowing things up, right?

[CS: Some strange mechanical tentacle things pop out of the walls and fly towards the party, but Skywarp destroys them.]

O: [screechy voice] Excuse me, I'm Starscream, I don't waste my ammo on something so trivial.

C: You have people do that for you.

O: [screechy voice] Uh, yes, those people are you.

C: [laughs]

S: Like, I think my performance in the last round is not uh, like, par for the course, probably.

[Starscream: There, just as I told you!  The Energon Bridge Terminal.  Find a way inside and activate it!

OS: The party continues onwards, before arriving in a large room with a large oblong structure in the center.]

S: Egh!

[Skywarp: I thought this place was deserted!

OS: Thundercracker and Starscream fly to the right side of the structure and begin shooting at the nearby sentries.  Multiple probes are also deployed and attack them both.]

C: Well, you thought wrong!

[Starscream: We must’ve tripped the station’s automated defenses.  Open fire!]

S: Uh…

O: Uh, help!

[OS: Thundercracker goes down.]

S: Nuts, sorry, I’m dead.

[OS: Starscream goes down.]

O: Ah, crap!  We're both dead, honey.

C: Yes, so am I.

[OS: The, “Mission Failed,” screen appears.]

O: We're all dead, honey. [laughs]

[OS: Owls selects, “Restart From Last Checkpoint.”]

C: I’m not sure what killed us?

O: Uh, I think it was things that came out of the middle there.  That better be a damn checkpoint.

[OS: The party starts in the same room they previously died in.  The screen reads, “New Objective: Re-route power to the energon bridge.”

Starscream: There, just as I told you!  The Energon Bridge Terminal.  Find a way inside and activate it!]

S: Sentries.

[OS: The party moves towards the door in the right side of the oblong object, shooting at the probes and sentries.

Skywarp: I thought this place was deserted!

Starscream: We must’ve tripped the station’s automated defenses.  Open fire!]

S: It’s sentry time!

[SS: Thundercracker destroys several sentry guns.]

S: Oh, there’s... thingies.

[Skywarp: More cloakers?  These guys creep me out!]

O: What the fuck is shooting at me?

[Thundercracker: What’s the matter, Skywarp--afraid?]

C: They're- they're like inside this big room.

[Skywarp: At least I’m not ugly.

Thundercracker: Ugly?  You and I look the SAME!]

S: I’m dead.

[SS: Thundercracker is killed by the last remaining sentry gun.]

O: I’ll try to get over there, I need to kill that thing first though.

S: Mmm.

[CS: Skywarp is inside the oblong structure exploring it, swapping back and forth between his robot and his vehicle modes.

Skywarp: Okay, let’s take off!]

S: Ah.

[CS: Skywarp is still flying around by himself in the structure.  He destroys two probes that move in front of him.]

S: Thank you- WAAAA!  Screw you!

O: Crap!

S: Oh shoot, are you behind me?

O: Yes I'm trying to- there, I killed it.

S: Oh, thank you.

C: Did anyone’s screen go dark, or is that just me?

[OS: Thundercracker and Starscream have finally entered the structure as well.  Overall, it is darker inside but everything’s still visible.]

O: It is a lot darker, yes.

C: Okay.

S: Yeah, it is.

C: I was a little confused.

O: Oh my god, I would kill for some damn health.

S: Same.

C: Last-

S: I mean, there's guns.

C: There's a plasma cannon.

[OS: The group walks over to some guns on the floor.  Starscream is at one bar of health.

Starscream: I still require medical attention!]

O: I did not like the plasma cannon at all.

C: Specs, you want it?

[SS: Starscream and Skywarp are running around in their bot modes, but Thundercracker is still in his vehicle mode.  He approaches the Plasma Cannon, but the prompt to pick it up doesn’t appear.]

S: Uh, mm, I can’t interact with it.

C: [laughs] You’re just scooting around as a jet.

S: [laughs]

C: You need to stop being a jet.  Stop being a jet, right now! [laughs]

S: I’m out of ammo.  Alright, okay, fine, I can pick that up.

[SS: Thundercracker transforms into bot mode and picks up the Plasma Cannon.]

C: Alright.

O: Okay…

S: Where are we supposed to go?

O: We should go down here, maybe?

[OS: Starscream is walking around when an energy blast charges in midair and is shot at him.]

O: Oh cripes, there are more of those invisible guys.

S: Oh.

C: Ah, so that’s what it is.

S: Where are you guys?

O: Ugh!

C: I’m on the bottom floor.

O: I am too, and I do not have a lot of health... so, help?

S: Ah.

C: I’m trying!

[CS: Skywarp chases around a clocker trying to shoot it before finally taking it out with a physical attack.]

S: I didn't realize there was a bottom floor, uh.

[CS: The party is near each other, all shooting at cloakers.]

S: Sorry, I am utilizing the spray-and-pray method of..

C: Hey, with infinite bullets you’re totally allowed to do that.

O: You can pray and spray as much as you want.

[SS: Thundercracker is assisting the rest of the party while in vehicle mode and spamming his machine guns.  He shoots something in the distance, causing an explosion.]

O: That was an explosion.

C: I think we got ‘em.

[SS: Starscream walks over to a console and activates it.  The lights come on and prompt to look at the ‘Ambush’ appears on the screen.]

O: We got ambushed?

[Thundercracker: Detecting Autobot energy signatures!]

O: [groans]

C: Nice to have lights again.

[Starscream: More fools rush to their death.  Destroy them!]

O: I can only destroy them when I have ammo, dipshit!

C: The melee button is a wonderful thing.

[Megatron (COM): Starscream, report!

Starscream: Megatron!  We are encountering significant Autobot resistance but…

SS: Thundercracker shoots a barrel of explosives and takes damage, he then shoots the other closer barrel and dies.]

S: I'm down.

[Megatron (COM): I will not suffer excuses.  Do not fail me!]

S: I am also not entirely sure how, unless I was too close to the explosion?

[CS: Skywarp engages some Autobots in combat but takes damage and goes down.]

C: I am also down.

[CS: Skywarp begins to slowly move through a nearby doorway.  In the distance Starscream can be seen reviving Thundercracker.

Skywarp: You really told him, Starscream.

Starscream: Silence!  Soon the Decepticons will be mine to control and Megatron will serve me!]

C: I'm trying to scoot to safety.

[OS: Starscream transforms and flies over to Skywarp.  He begins to revive him.]

O: [laughs] Scoot to safety?

C: [laughs]

O: You're so cute, and yet you keep dying.

S: We all need the heals.

C: I don't know who's killing- ow!  What the-?

[SS: Thundercracker continues to shoot at Autobots while in vehicle mode.  A downed ally icon appears to Thundercracker’s right.]

O: Just gonna start singing, ‘You're Welcome,’ from Moana, in- here in a minute I swear to god.

[SS: The downed ally icon disappears.]

C: I don't remember the lyrics.

O: [singing] You’re welcome! [laughs]

C: Yeah, that’s the only part I can remember.

C: Oh by the way I’m down again, no wait…

O: I remember it being the Rock and being awesome.

[CS: The party is running/flying around continuing to take out Autobots.]

C: I’m not down, I thought I was.

S: No you’re not.

O: [laughs] “No you’re not.”

S: [laughs]

C: You almost sounded like- angry like, how dare you tell me you were dead!?!

S: [laughs]

[CS: Skywarp uses his spinning ability in and empty room, steadily heading towards where Starscream and Thundercracker are.]

O: Thundercracker got hopeful, you can’t do that to him!

S: [continues laughing]

C: Oh, wait, I can turn invisible, right?

[CS: Skywarp uses his other ability and turns invisible.]

O: Yeah.

S: Yes?

C: Oh my goodness!  I should have been using this.

S: Well, yeah.

[OS: The party has moved up to the upper floor and are fighting more Autobots.]

S: [sighs]

O: Are you gonna-

[Skywarp: Watch where you point that thing!]

O: [snorts]

[SS: Thundercracker and Skywarp take out the last Autobot, and the objective icon appears above a nearby console.

S: Okay, we gotta do a thing with this, so…

[SS: Starscream walks over to the panel, activating it.  A shield blocking a large tunnel in front of the party drops.  The party runs/flies on ahead.

Starscream: My wounds remain unrepaired!]

O: Seriously, is there health anywhere?  Because I think we all need health.

C: I haven’t seen any.

S: Yeah.

[Thundercracker: The station is only showing power levels at 50%.  There must be another terminal deeper underground.

OS: The tunnel is full of robotic arms and big lasers that appears to be running automatically.]

S: Ack!

O: Oh, christ…

S: Um.

[CS: Skywarp pulls ahead of Starscream, and another tentacled thing flies into the tunnel before being taken out by Skywarp and Starscream.]

C: Oh, there's more sentries.

[Thundercracker: I’m reading Autobot energy signatures up ahead.]

S: Yes, you guys are rather in front of me.

[CS: Thundercracker comes to a bend in the tunnel, where he finds a lone Autobot standing on a raised platform.]

C: Ah, there’s missiles!

[CS: Skywarp takes out the Autobot.

Skywarp: I do enjoy sniping!

Starscream: Afraid to take them head on, Skywarp?]

S: Uh, I don't know where you guys are.  I think I’m lost.

C: It’s- it’s a-

[SS: Thundercracker flies down the tunnel arriving at the end and turning to his left, when he sees Starscream and Skywarp shooting at Autobots.]

S: Oh.

[SS: Skywarp turns around.]

C: You’re right behind us.

S: Okay.

[Skywarp: I’m the fastest thing on two wings!

SS: Thundercracker takes heavy damage from the enemy snipers.]

S: Aw, nuts.

[OS: Starscream is standing on a platform shooting at the Autobots on the far side of the room with a Thermal Rocket Launcher.]

O: Somebody said I needed a rocket launcher, and I got one.

S: Oh!

[OS: Starscream transforms and flies over to another platform inside the large room where the Autobots have been attacking them from.  Thundercracker hovers over an energon cube.]

O: You should grab that.

[OS: Thundercracker grabs the health and flies off while Starscream ducks behind cover to avoid enemy fire.]

S: Thank you, health is helpful.

[Starscream: The destruction can begin!]

S: Oh.

[CS: An invisible Skywarp comes up behind an Autobot hiding behind a shield and hits him multiple times with his physical move, taking him down.]

S: Ahhhh!  I don’t like this!

C: [laughs]

S: [laughs] But when do I like-

[SS: Thundercracker flies forward towards the remaining Autobots on the far side of the room, but is downed at a nearby Autobot.]

C: You sounded like Monsters Inc.

S: [laughs]

C: [singing] Take that thing back where it came from-

C & O: [singing] Or so help me!

C: [singing] So help me!

S: S- s- sorry-

O: AMMO!  Sweet fucking god, ammo!

S: Sor- sorry, I’m dead.

C: I'm gonna try to get to you, I don't know if I can with all that firing going on.

[OS: Starscream takes out two of the nearby Aerialbots in rapid succession with his Null Ray.]

C: I could turn invisible and resurrect you, and they don't shoot me!

[OS: The downed ally icon disappears and Thundercracker and Skywarp fly on ahead, Starscream transforming into jet mode to follow them.]

S: Nice!  That is-

O: Well, I did kill them too, but sure.

C: No, but I mean they don't shoot at me while I'm going in for the rescue.

S: Well, yeah.

C: Sorry, this is rev- this is a revelation for me!

O: There’s ammo back there, by the way, if anybody needed it.

[OS: Thundercracker flies over to the platform indicated by Starscream and retrieves ammo.]

C: I don’t need it.

O: It’s over here.

C: I've been punching things to death.

S: [laughs]

O: Good to know.

C: It's an effective-

[OS: Starscream flies straight ahead through a waterfall, arriving in a small cubby with an Autobot symbol flanked by two shield chests.]

C: Oh!  There's an Autobot symbol and two shields back here!

[OS: Starscream runs forward, using a physical attack on the Autobot symbol before taking one of the shields for himself.]

O: I’ll take that, and THAT!

C: There was an Autobot symbol, and there was two shields!

S: [laughs]

C: Now there’s one shield.

O: But- but ah, Specs, you can have the other shield.

C: Yeah.

S: Okay, I’m just not entirely sure where you guys are?

[SS: Thundercracker is slowly flying towards a door the objective icon is indicating.]

O: I have my sniper rifle-!

C: Behind the-

O: Behind the waterfall.

S: Um.

O: I have my sniper rifle back, I’m so happy!

[SS: Thundercracker lands in front the door where a console is sitting.]

S: Oh, I found a thing to interact with, do you want me to interact with it?

C: Wait- wait- wait- wait, if you're not gonna take the shield I will.  Alright, interact-

S: Well-

C: Interact away!

[SS: Thundercracker looks to his left, and runs over and picks up some nearby health.]

S: Well, actually I'm gonna- there's health, do you guys need health?

C: No, cuz I got a shield.

[Thundercracker: That’s much better.]

S: Okay, there’s also ammo, and then interaction time.  I think I'm opening a door.

[SS: Thundercracker runs back to the console activating it.  The door opens on another large room, where an Autobot is standing directly in front of Thundercracker with his back to him.]

S: Oh shit.

[Autobot: Alert!  Alert!]

S: Ohhh!

[CS: Skywarp turns invisible and him and Thundercracker rush into the room and begin engaging with Autobots.]

O: Shit, where- what happened?

S: It opened-

O: I like, teleported or something.

S: Sorry.

C: Yeah, you were too far behind.

[CS: Skywarp walks up behind an Autobot while invisible and takes him down with his Energon mace.]

S: Alright, shoot, what is… there- there is a point here somewhere, but I'm not sure what it is?

C: It is to murder all of the Autobots scum.

[OS: While Thundercracker and Skywarp continue to run around the room, Starscream stays behind cover, sniping various Autobots, including the ones at the two turrets.]

C: Look what you've done to me, Specs and Owls.

S: [laughs]

O: What?

C: Turned me into a Decepticon!

[OS: Starscream takes several shoots at an Autobot chasing Thundercracker but misses.]

O: Yeah, you're playing with me.  I don't know what you expected here, sweetie.

[SS: Thundercracker continues to fight with the Autobot chasing him, dropping below one bar health.  Starscream runs over and shoots him before running back to cover.]

S: Oh sorry, I think I am... oh no, I'm not dead.  I am just... damaged?  Ohh~

[SS: Thundercracker sees one of the explosive items and walks backwards trying to shoot it, but doesn’t realize he’s using one of the healing guns so it does nothing.]

C: You know, the phrase, “What's your damage?” takes on a whole new meaning-

[SS: A downed ally icon appears, and Starscream flies through the nearby door in jet mode.]

C: Oh, I'm down.

S: I don’t know what this thing does…?

C: Uh, game’s gonna get it ended-

O: Um, where are you?

C: I went into some weird room, and the door closed behind me.

[CS: Skywarp is down, and the timer continues to tick down...]

S: [laughs]

[OS: The Mission Failed screen appears.]

O: [groans]

S: Well, I’m dead.  Chezni, was dead-

O: No, that was Chezni, that was all Chezni’s fault.

[OS: Owls selects, “Restart from Last Checkpoint.”]

C: Yeah.

O: I was still alive!

[OS: The party restarts right outside the closed door Thundercracker had previously opened, the screen reads, “New Objective: Re-route power to the energon bridge.”  Starscream walks forward and activates the console, opening the door.]

C: I didn’t know the door was gonna close behind me!

Note: There was no door, he just got lost lol ~O

C: I was just flying around minding my own business.

[Autobot: Watch out!  Decepticons!

OS: Starscream walks over to his right and picks up some ammo.  A Neutron Assault Rifle is right next to it.]

O: Oh guns!  Hello ammo.

C: There's some health here.

[OS: Starscream runs back over to the door and takes cover, aiming at the Autobots inside the room.]

O: I'm actually good.

[SS: Thundercracker runs forward trying to attack an Autobot.  The Autobot is destroyed by Starscream but Thundercracker hits an explosive barrel with his physical attack and goes down.]

O: Headshot, motherfucker, headshot.

S: I'm dead.

C: There's a turret up here!

[OS: Starscream takes out two Autobots near the fallen Thundercracker, then transforms and flies over, transforming back to revive him.]

S: Ohh~

[OS: Thundercracker is revived.]

S: Thank you.

O: You're welcome!

[OS: Starscream transforms back into vehicle mode and flies back to the boxes he’s been taking cover behind.]

S: Oh~

C: I'm definitely taking this turret with me.

[CS: Skywarp rips off a turret, jumps down from the platform he’s on and immediately shoots the two Autobots he’s landed in front of.]

S: Oh~

[SS: Thundercracker is in jet mode, shooting at some Autobots with sheilds at close range, but is shot and goes down.]

S: Oh.  I'm dead.  I found... a thing, that I guess is a- one of the things we're supposed to interact with but I'm also dead, and yeah, Autobots.

O: If I can find you.

[SS: Thundercracker blows up.]

S: Nope, I blew up.  That was me.

[OS: The Mission Failed screen appears and Owls selects, “Restart from Last Checkpoint.”]

O: [sighs] Everybody just wants to blow up today and obviously I'm not cool because I don't understand why people find it fun.

[OS: The party spawns back in the same room as before.  The screen reads, “New Objective: Re-route power to the energon bridge.”  Starscream walks over to the console and opens the door.]

S: I did not want to blow up!

[Autobot: Alert!  Alert!

CS/OS/SS: The party runs in and begins to fight with the various Autobots.  Starscream remains behind cover sniping, while Skywarp and Thundercracker get more up close and personal with the enemy.]

S: Oh, it's a plasma cannon.  Oh, I'm out.

[CS: Skywarp is fighting with two Autobots with shields.  A downed ally icon appears to his right, before Skywarp goes down as well.  Skywarp begins to slowly float towards an opening to get back into the main room where the other Seekers are.]

C: Shoot, so am I.

[OS: Starscream is in the middle reviving Thundercracker.]

O: You two are killing me.

S: Sorry!

[OS: Starscream transforms and flies up to Skywarp to begin reviving him.]

S: Ah, nuts to you Autobot.

C: I'm trying to fly down.

[OS: Starscream’s thinking “Help me, don’t help me!” as Skywarp flies past him while he’s trying to revive him.  But Skywarp is successfully revived.]

O: You’re lucky I still have a shield left.

C: [laughs]

O: Are you alive?

C: Yep.

[CS: Skywarp continues to fight Autobots.]

O: Okay!  Everybody's still alive!

[SS: Thundercracker is fighting two shield Autobots and goes down.]

S: Sorry, I'm dead.

C & S: [laugh]

O: You’ve gotta be kidding me!

[CS: The Mission Failed screen appears and Owls selects, “Restart from Last Checkpoint.”]

C: Ah, so… I need to stop dying

O: I'm doing nothing wrong, got it?

[CS: The party starts at the checkpoint.]

C: [laughs]

O: I'm doing nothing wrong, that's what I thought!  Also, I'm taking this fucking ammo, okay?

[CS: Starscream runs past Skywarp and picks up some ammo.]

C: Okay!

[CS: Starscream opens the door.

Autobot: Alert!  Alert!]

O: [laughs]  We're just gonna call this in the chapter were Specs did nothing wrong.  Not a single thing! [Nothing like saying the wrong name for MYSELF, I meant Owls here ~O]

[CS: Skywarp immediately shoots the Autobot on the other side of the door before he can even turn around.]

C & S: [laugh]

[OS: Starscream shoots at an Autobot at one of the turrets, missing the first shot but getting him on the second.]

O: Oh my god, I'm hitting you, fucker!

[OS: Starscream continues to shoot at Autobots with his Null Ray from behind cover.]

S: Oh.

[CS: Skywarp rips off one of the turrets.

Skywarp: If Skywarp wants it, Skywarp takes it!

CS: He destroys multiple Autobots using the turret.]

C: Oh my goodness, are we alive?

[OS: Starscream continues to shoot at Autobots, heading into some of the narrower hallways connected to the main room they’ve been fighting in, following Thundercracker.]

S: Yes... somewhat, sort of.

O: Do you need that health?

[SS: Thundercracker walks past an energon cube.]

S: I've got three bars.

O: Take it because I still have a shield.

S: Um.

[CS: Skywarp is fighting several Autobots with shields, taking damage from various grenades that are being lobbed around the room.  He runs over to take out one of the Autobots with his physical attack, but goes down after killing them.]

C: Oh, ah, man I fell.  I'm on the left top room.

[SS: Starscream runs past Thundercracker and over to Skywarp and revives him.  Thundercracker walks over to a console.]

S: Oh.  It looks like, uh, do you want me to interact with this thing?

O: Uh, just wanted to make sure there wasn't anything in here, then yes.

C: I want this turret first.

O: Okay, let him take the turret.  Skywarp wants a souvenir turret!

[SS: Skywarp runs over to a turret and rips it off, while the other two Seekers stay near the console.]

S: [laughs]

O: That’s what I’m calling it, okay.

C: All right, this is my new toy.

O: Okay, now that everybody's happy-

[CS: Thundercracker activates the console, opening the door right in front of them.  Skywarp runs over and the party begins to shoot at the Autobots on the other side of the door.  Thundercracker is using a gun that shoots blue energy out of it, and it doesn’t seem to be affecting the enemies.]

S: Ahh!  Hi, Autobots!

C: [laughs] I don’t know why, but the way you said that was funny.

[Starscream: Nothing will stop me!  Blast those locks!

OS: The party continues shooting Autobots, as well as some locks on a door to the left.]

O: Did you pick up a healing gun!?!

C: What?

S: Me?  No?

O: I saw it healing things!  I don’t know where it was coming from, maybe it was an Autobot…

S: Uh, it's some sort of plasma thing?

O: Huh.

[SS: Thundercracker walks up to a closed door, it starts to open and he backs up.]

S: Uhhh!

[SS: The door opens, revealing no Autobots inside.]

S: Ohh!~

O: Health, thank you.

[SS: Thundercracker shoots the blue ray again and Skywarp walks up beside him..]

C: Actually, yeah, Specs has some kind of weird... I don't know what it is?

S: I don’t know, it’s a plasma gun, I don’t know.

O: Can you show-

[SS: Thundercracker swaps his gun from an Energon Repair Ray to a Plasma Cannon.]

S: Well, that’s a plasma-

O: Yeah, that one.

[SS: Thundercracker swaps back to the Energon Repair Ray, and backs away from Starscream and Skywarp.]

S: Oh, I've got an Energon Repair Ray, oh.

O: Yeah!  You’ve got a healing gun.

S: Okay, you’re- Owls you’re fully healed.  Lemme-

[SS: Starscream backs away from where Skywarp is standing.]

O: I’m fully healed.

S: When the hell did I get that?

O: I don't know.

[SS: Thundercracker heals Skywarp not quite to full health before swapping to his Plasma Cannon, which has no ammo left.

Skywarp: Now we’re talking!]

S: Sorry, but I'm all out of ammo, so I need to be a plane.

[SS: Thundercracker transforms into vehicle mode.]

C: [laughs]

[Starscream: All right… this station seems to funnel power directly to the Energon Bridge.

Thundercracker: Those are the Energon Bridge’s power control panels.

SS: The door closes in front of Thundercracker, locking him out of the room Starscream and Skywarp have walked into.]

S: Oh, um, I'm sorry, I'm on the wrong side of the door.

C: It’ll probably-

O: Hopefully, you’ll teleport?

C: -yeah.

[OS: An in-game cinematic starts, with the three Seekers walking around a large room full of various boxes, equipment, and tubes.  A door opens in front of Starscream, revealing a console, in front of some pod-like machine things behind glass.

Skywarp: Wow, Starscream--that WAS impressive.

Starscream: Silence, fool!  We need to supply these side terminals with their energon power cells.]

S: Oh yeah, good.

[OS: Starscream activates the console, but nothing moves.  Two red targets appear on either side of the glass panel.

Thundercracker:  Looks like the Autobots have locked these power cells down.

Starscream: Quickly--destroy the locks!]

S: Uh..

C: Destroy the locks?  Alright.

[CS: The party shoots at the locks, destroying them.]

C: Welp, we destroyed the locks!  Now what, fearless leader?

O: [screechy voice] Oh, don't ‘fearless leader’ me!

[CS: An in-game cinematic starts, and the three pod things behind glass move downwards, under the floor before getting destroyed.

Skywarp: What happened now!

Starscream: The Autobots have booby trapped this room.  Fools!

Skywarp: Wait--are you calling US fools, or the Autobots fools?]

O: [laughs]

[Skywarp: Because--I’m not getting the sense that you respect me!]

C & O: [laugh]

[Starscream: Silence!  Fool!

Skywarp: That’s EXACTLY what I’m talking about!]

O: [snorts and then laughs] I mean...

C: “Starscream!  I’m getting the distinct impression you don't respect me!”

[Starscream: This is almost too easy.  Quickly, find the other power terminals.

SS: Thundercracker flies around the outskirts of the room, but doesn’t see anything unusual.]

S: [laughs] Okay-

O: [screechy voice]  Respect?  What is that?  Some sort of Earth TERM?

C: ...Yes.

S: Umm, I'm not entirely sure what I should be doing?

C: Nah, I’m pretty lost too.

O: Uh, there's probably a power cell that we need to destroy- er, I destroyed one of them.

[Skywarp: Now we’re talkin’!]

O: Maybe?  ...Maybe not.  Maybe they just want to fuck with us.

[OS: Starscream is flying around near the floor, attempting to follow a glowing red conduit.]

O: Is that-

C: Oh, there's- no, we’ve got to follow the conduit.

S: Oh, the-

C: So follow the red glowy thing that's running along the floor.

S: Okay.

C: And then it goes up?

O: Cuz like, I killed one of them…

[CS: Skywarp continues to fly around the room.]

O: Hmm, no.

[CS: Skywarp follows a conduit that loops behind some of the boxes and other piping and finds one of the power cells.]

C: Oh, it's up here, hang on.

[CS: Skywarp destroys the power cell.

Starscream: Excellent, now keep looking--there should be just one more.

SS: Thundercracker shoots the last power cell.

Thundercracker: Energy barriers are 100% offline.

Starscream: Perfect!  Now--get these power cells into position!]

C: Wait a minute!  Can something not be a hundred percent offline? I mean, it’s- it's either on or off, you can't be in the middle.

O: [screechy voice] Shut up Skywarp!

C: [laughs]

O: [laughs] I'm sorry I can't resist.

C: Oh, I love it.

S: Alright, er-

O: Cool, where do we go now, dum-dums?

[OS: Starscream is walking around on the bottom of the room looking around for another console or something to activate.]

C: Right- right!?

O: [screechy voice] Fools!  Which way do we go!?

C: I don’t know what to do!

[OS: Starscream transforms and begins to slowly fly around the room looking for what they’re supposed to activate.

Thundercracker: The side terminals are showing power levels at maximum.]

S: I don’t know.  I mean, this looks like a door but...

[Starscream: Hahahaha!  We are but one click away from activating the full power of the Energon bridge!]

O: Cool.  How?

[OS: Starscream transforms, landing next to the now visible console, activating it.]

O: There we go, this one. [mutters something unintelligible]

[CS: The equipment in the room lights up, and begins transmitting energy.]

C: WOAH!  What the- ?

[Starscream: I did it!  Look at all that power flowing!  Onward, Decepticons!]

S: To where?

O: Space crack.  We have sup- supplied or booty call with space crack.

S: [laughs] Ah.  Okay, yes, out the door.

[CS: Activating the console has opened a door to a tunnel leading downwards.  The party enters.

Thundercracker: I am detecting an unknown energy signature nearby.  Off the scale…

Starscream: Then we are close - the Energon Bridge must be nearby.

OS: The party arrives in a large circular room.  A machine stands in the center, with flooring that is a mixture of metal frames and glass radiating from the center.  Above the machine there appears to be another glass platform of some kind going around the edge of the room.

Starscream: The device must be inside that machine.  Plant a Dark Energon Det-Pack on its power cable to activate it.

Thundercracker: My scans indicate that--]

S: Uh…

[Starscream: I’ve had enough of your readings!  Use Dark Energon and corrupt the machine!

OS: Starscream flies forward and transforms, landing in front of the device indicated by the UI, and plants a detpack on it.]

C: [laughs] Your READINGS!

S: Uh, I got locked out again.

[OS: The detpack explodes, and, “New Objective: Destroy the Energon Bridge Guardian,” pops up.

An in-game cinematic starts, the machine activates, with the upper portion lifting up and firing its guns at the party.

Skywarp: Whoa… what’s happening?!]

S: Okay, yay, it teleported me.

[Thundercracker: Precisely what I was afraid of.  Cybertron is trying to purge itself of contamination.]

C: Wait.  We're on Cybertron?

O: Yeah.

S: I guess.

[Skywarp: What contamination?

Starscream: He means US, you idiot!

OS: The Seekers all dodge a blast from device’s guns.  The camera focuses on Starscream as he flips into the air, transforming into jet mode.]

C: [laughs]

[Starscream: Quit blabbing and destroy this nuisance!]

S: Mm.

[SS: The upper portion of the device begins to rotate as it continues shooting.  Thundercracker hovers, shooting the machine.]

S: Alright, by- ?  Okay?  What am I supposed to be shooting?

[CS: Skywarp is shooting at the devices guns.]

C: Uh, if your reticle turns red it means you're hitting something.  I think it's the big- the big red circles is what you want to be aiming for on the machine, but not-

S: Um.

C: Oddly enough, not the big one in the center.

[CS: The device stops shooting and drops its guns, but other portions of the machine open up and begin generating wide pink laser beams that begin rotating.  There is an upper beam and lower beam, they are currently rotating in opposite directions to each other.

Thundercracker: Evade those beams!

Skywarp: Move!  Move!  Move!]

S: Oh.

C: I know that doesn't make a lot of sense but…

S: Sorry, I'm not entirely sure…?

[OS: Starscream and Thundercracker are flying around trying to avoid the beams.]

C: Well, right now we just need to be dodging the beam.

S: I'm... doing very badly at that!

C: Now shoot the small red circles.

[OS: The machine stops and the center opens up revealing a power core.]

O: Oh, no, shoot the Power Core!

[Starscream: The machine is vulnerable!  Focus your fire on the core!]

C: Yeah, now we need to shoot the power core.

S: Oh.

[OS: The party shoots the power core, and then the machine closes up, raising it’s guns and beginning to shoot again.]

S: Well, nuts.

C: Now go back to shooting the red- the red lights on the guns.

[CS: Skywarp circles around the machine, shooting at the guns.

Skywarp: Are we even hurting this thing?

Starscream: Not with your pathetic aim!  Focus fire on those guns!]

S: Oh sorry, I’m dead.

C: Uh, where are ya?

[CS: A downed ally icon appears on the other side of the room.  Skywarp begins flying around the machine to get to the other side.]

O: I see ya.

[CS: Another downed ally icon appears next to the first.]

O: I am also dead.

C: No!

O: Help?

C: I'm coming!

[CS: Skywarp zips towards Starscream and Thundercracker but overshoots.]

C: Shoot.

[CS: Thundercracker explodes as Skywarp turns around.]

S: Sorry, I'm dead.  Possibly we're all dead?

[SS: The game over screen displays.]

C: Well the show can't carry on without Skywarp!

S: [laughs]

[SS: The party spawns in the boss room.  “New Objective: Activate the Energon Bridge,” appears in the right hand corner.]

O: You mean Thunderacker!

C: Or Thundercracker, which one are you?

S: [laughs]

[Thundercracker: My scans indicate that--

Starscream: I’ve had enough of your readings!  Use Dark Energon and corrupt the machine!]

C: Jet A and Jet B.

O: I'm gonna make you build one of my model kits so that you'll remember which one- like, which one we're talking about.

[OS: New Objective, “Destroy the energon bridge guardian,” displays in the bottom right corner of the screen.]

C: They're both the same!

[OS: The same cinematic of the device activating from before plays.

Skywarp: Whoa… what’s happening?!]

O: [gruff voice] You're ugly! [normal voice] WE LOOK THE SAME! [laughs]

[Thundercracker: Precisely what I was afraid of.  Cybertron is trying to purge itself of contamination.]

C: And then there's red whiny jet, but at least I remember him.

S: [laughs]

[Skywarp: What contamination?

Starscream: He means US, you idiot!]

O: [screechy voice] Excuse me! I'm white, and red, and blue.  If you're going to insult me, at least have the decency to do it right.

[Starscream: Quit blabbing and destroy this nuisance!]

S: Mm.

C: Yeah, I'll let Megatron take care of that.

O: Shut up. [laughs]

C: [laughs]

[CS/OS: The party targets the device’s guns, until it drops it’s guns and activates it’s beams.

Thundercracker: Evade those beams!

Skywarp: Move!  Move!  Move!

SS: Thundercracker gets hit by one of the beams, taking away an significant portion of his health.  He attempts to fly higher, to where the upper glass platform is clearly visible, but is stopped by an invisible barrier.]

S: Uh, shit.

[SS: The machine stops and the center opens up revealing a power core.  The party shoots at it.

Starscream: The machine is vulnerable!  Focus your fire on the core!]

S: Why would they design it like that?

C: [laughs]

O: It has to cool off, I don't know.

[OS: The machine closes up, raising it’s guns and beginning to shoot again.  The party targets the guns.

Skywarp: Are we even hurting this thing?

Starscream: Not with your pathetic aim!  Focus fire on those guns!]

C: [laughs] That’s a perfectly valid question!

S: It's a shitty ass design!

C: It would be like if you created a giant weapon, but like, every two minutes it had to open up and expose its weakness.

S: [laughs]

[Skywarp:  Ha!  He’s not so tough!

SS: The device stops and drops it’s guns, preparing to generating the beams.]

O: What?  That's like, what video games do, isn't it?

C: Yeah, yeah, video games.

[SS: Thundercracker banks to the right to get away from the part of the machine that will generate the beams.]

S: Oh shit, woop.

O: Uh, you okay?

S: Yeah.  Okay, it’s just now it's time to fly.

[Megatron (COM): Starscream!  What is taking so long!

Starscream: Just a slight delay…

SS: The spinning beams start up again.  Thundercracker again tries to pull upwards but is still blocked by the invisible wall.  He is hit by a beam, but not destroyed.]

C: Oh no, I got cut in half.

S: Same…

[SS: The game over screen displays.]

A: [laugh]

O: Woooow.

A: [continue to laugh]

O: I just-

C: That’s unfortunate.

[SS: The party spawns in the boss room.  “New Objective: Activate the Energon Bridge,” appears in the right hand corner.]

O: You’re, like, required, when you edit this, honey, to like, go back and forth between me being a badass... and you two.

C & S: [laugh]

[Thundercracker: My scans indicate that--

Starscream: I’ve had enough of your readings!  Use Dark Energon and corrupt the machine!]

S: Look-

O: I mean that is the most loving way possible.

S: Look, I've been useful, sometimes!

O: [laughs]

[SS: The same cinematic of the device activating from before plays.

Skywarp: Whoa… what’s happening?!]

C: “I’ve been useful!”

O: [laughs]

C: “...sometimes!”

[Thundercracker: Precisely what I was afraid of.  Cybertron is trying to purge itself of contamination.]

O & S: [laugh]

O: I’m just saying, it’s very funny when it’s like, um-

[Skywarp: What contamination?

Starscream: He means US, you idiot!  Quit blabbing and destroy this nuisance!

CS: The party fires on the guns.]

O: Oh, I got cut in half and here I am flying like a badass, and I’m like, “Cut in half!?”

[SS: The device drops it’s guns and activates it’s beams.]

S: Ugh..

[Thundercracker: Evade those beams!

Skywarp: Move!  Move!  Move!]

S: Oh, shit.  Shit.

[SS: Thundercracker is flying around trying to avoid the beams, but nicks them several times before running into the center of the machine, which apparently is an insta-death.]

S: I hate... these pink things!

[SS: The game over screen displays.]

A: [laugh]

[Starscream: The device must be inside that machine.  Plant a Dark Energon Det-Pack on its power cable to activate it.

SS: The party spawns in the boss room.  “New Objective, activate the energon bridge,” displays in the right hand corner for disappearing.]

O: Death!  Pink horrible death!

S: [laughs]

[Thundercracker: My scans indicate that--

Starscream: I’ve had enough of your readings!  Use Dark Energon and corrupt the machine!

OS: Starscream flies forward, transforming and planting the detpak.]

C: Your ‘readings!’

O: [screechy voice] Your ‘readings’!

[OS: The same cinematic of the device activating from before plays.  New Objective, “Destroy the energon bridge guardian,” displays in the bottom right corner of the screen.

Skywarp: Whoa… what’s happening?!

Thundercracker: Precisely what I was afraid of.  Cybertron is trying to purge itself of contamination.

Skywarp: What contamination?

Starscream: He means US, you idiot!  Quit blabbing and destroy this nuisance!]

S: I got to be Sky- Thundercracker... the scientist.  For some reason.

[OS: The party target the guns.]

O: I mean, honestly, I think- I think I love it?  Skywarp’s [Thundercracker’s] the one that's like, “Oh my god, I fucking told you so, asshole!”

S: [laughs]

[SS: Thundercracker has destroyed the front portion of the guns directly in front of him, beams are no longer shooting  from that part.]

S: Ohh~  That was… helpful.

[CS: The guns drop.]

C: Okay, so I would recommend if you have trouble avoiding the blades-

[CS: Skywarp attempts to fly up to the secondary glass platform, but is also blocked by an invisible wall.  The machine activates the laserbeams.]

S: Yeah.

C: Oh, they won't let you.  They don't let you fly up!

[CS: The party dodges the laserbeams.]

S: Yes, I'm trying to fly up!

C: That's ridiculous!

O: Just fly in the same direction as one of them.  Whether it’s the top or the bottom.

[CS: The game over screen displays.]

S: I know.  I had tried that and they kept catching up to me.

O: You've got to speed up.

C: Oh yeah-

S: I’m using the thrusters!

C: You are?

O: Okay, if you stay more near the middle you have to travel less distance.

[CS: The party spawns in the boss room.  “New Objective, activate the energon bridge,” displays in the right hand corner for disappearing.]

C: Yeah.

O: Don't go all the way out.

[Thundercracker: My scans indicate that--

Starscream: I’ve had enough of your readings!  Use Dark Energon and corrupt the machine!

CS: Skywarp flies up to the glass platform that’s inaccessible during the fight.]

C: But yeah, look!  I'm totally up here!  You can fly up here before the boss battle starts, but then when it starts it won't let you fly out, that's ridiculous.

[CS: Skywarp flies over to the device in the center of the room and lands on top of it.]

C: Look, I'm on its head!

[CS: New Objective, “Destroy the energon bridge guardian,” displays in the bottom right corner of the screen.  The same cinematic of the device activating from before plays.

Skywarp: Whoa… what’s happening?!

S: [laughs]

C: I was!

[Thundercracker: Precisely what I was afraid of.  Cybertron is trying to purge itself of contamination.

Skywarp: What contamination?

Starscream: He means US, you idiot!]

S: I saw that.

C: And then it's like, oh no, you're fighting it you can't do the smart thing and you know fly away!

O: Even though we're fucking jets.

C: Right!

[Starscream: Quit blabbing and destroy this nuisance!

SS: The party targets the guns.]

S: [sighs]

[SS: The device drops it’s guns, and begins generating the laserbeams.

Thundercracker: Evade those beams!

Skywarp: Move!  Move!  Move!

SS: Thundercracker hangs close to the middle, but accidentally touches the center of he device, dying instantly.  The game over screen displays.]

S: Okay, I don't know what the hell killed me, but I died.

C: We're gonna have to figure this out.

S: I guess I was too close to it?  I touched it, I didn't touch the pink stuff.

[OS: Owls selects, “Continue from Last Checkpoint.”]

O: Yeah, don’t touch it.  Don’t touch it.

[Starscream: The device must be inside that machine.  Plant a Dark Energon Det-Pack on its power cable to activate it.

OS: The party spawns in the boss room.  “New Objective, activate the energon bridge,” displays in the right hand corner for disappearing.  Starscream flies forward and transforms, dropping to the platform below, and planting a detpack on it.]

C: So how much health do you have coming into this fight?

S: Full hel- full health.

C: Okay

[Thundercracker: My scans indicate that--

Starscream: I’ve had enough of your readings!  Use Dark Energon and corrupt the machine!]

C: When- when we activate- when it activates the blades one of us needs to find Specs and guide her.

S: [laughs]

[OS: New Objective, “Destroy the energon bridge guardian,” displays in the bottom right corner of the screen.  The same cinematic of the device activating from before plays.

Skywarp: Whoa… what’s happening?!

O: Or- just maybe follow Chezni, and see if that helps?

S: Uhh… I’ll try.

[Thundercracker: Precisely what I was afraid of.  Cybertron is trying to purge itself of contamination.

Skywarp: What contamination?

Starscream: He means US, you idiot!  Quit blabbing and destroy this nuisance!

CS: The party targets the guns.]

C: All right, I'll try and keep an eye on you.

[CS: Skywarp looks to his left and sees Thundercracker off in the distance.]

C: All right, there you are.

[CS: The machine drops its guns and Skywarp flies over next to Thundercracker.]

C: All right, Specs, come down here!

S: I'm following you.

C: All right.  Now we're just gonna fly in this direction.

[SS: Skywarp takes off as the beams start, Thundercracker stalls and gets hit by one of them before angling himself upwards and hitting one of the upper beams.]

S: Well, shit.

[SS: Thundercracker drops to the lower level and begins flying in the same direction as the pink laserbeam.]

S: Yes I'm flying in the direction of the pink…

[SS: The beams deactivate.]

S: [quietly] Shit, god.

C: That worked!

S: Thank you.  Ugh.

[SS: Thundercracker flies over to a glass cage thing with multiple energon cubes visible inside.  He destroys the cage and picks up some health.]

S: Oh, there's health.

[Starscream: The machine is vulnerable!  Focus your fire on the core!]

O: By all means take it.

C: Yeah, I don't need it.

[OS: Starscream and Skywarp take aim at the device’s power core.  Once the health drops a bit, the machine closes back up and raises its guns.  The party targets the guns.

Skywarp: Are we even hurting this thing?

Starscream: Not with your pathetic aim!  Focus fire on those guns!]

S: Hmmm.

[Skywarp: Ha!  He’s not so tough!

S: Ugh.

[OS: The machine drops it’s guns and activates it’s laserbeams.  The party flies around to avoid them.

Megatron (COM): Starscream!  What is taking so long!]

O: [snorts]

[Starscream: Just a slight delay...]

O: [laughs]

[Megatron (COM): I’m beginning to question your ability to deliver, Starscream.  Do not disappoint me!]

S: The booty call.

O: The booty call is being a jerk! [laughs]

C: “Just freshening up, boss!”

[OS: The machine drops the laserbeams and exposes its power core and the party shoots it.]

O: [laughs, before continuing on in a screechy voice] I'm TRYING to not be cut in two right now!

C: Okay, one more round!  One more round, right!?

[CS: The machine closes off the core.]

O: I do not have a ton of health left right now.

S: Um.

[Skywarp: What is it doing NOW?

Starscream: Who cares?  Just be ready for it!

CS: Lava is visible rising through the glass floor portions of the room.  Everything takes on an orangey-red glow.]

O: Oh dear.

[Thundercracker: Evasive maneuvers!]

S: Uh, shit.  I don’t know what’s happening.

[SS: The glass floor panels begin to explode.]

C: Lava.  Lava is happening.

S: Oh, goody.

[SS: The entire floor is covered with lava, except for a slightly raised ring around the base of the device.]

C: And missiles.

[SS: Fireballs come up out of the lava and target the party.]

S: Whilst I fly randomly, because I don't know what the hell I'm…

O: I mean, look, that's pretty much what we're doing.

C: Yeah, to be honest, I think that's to your benefit.

S: [laughs]

[OS: The machine generates the laserbeams again, but this time, both the upper and lower portions are stacked on top of each other and there’s easy way to move past them.]

S: Ah!

C: You’re kidding me.

S: Crap.

O: No, no-

[OS: Starscream hovers in place and is downed by fireballs.]

O: Oh damn it!

C: Are you down?

O: Uh, I’m down, I'm down.

C: All right, I…

[OS: The laserbeams begin moving and hit Starscream, cutting him in half.  The game over screen displays.]

O: And then I got cut in half.  Cool beans.

C: [laughs]

S: Okay.

O: I hope there was a checkpoint in the middle!

[SS: The party spawns in at the point of the fight where the lava starts to rise through the floor.]

C: [sarcastically] “I did nothing wrong!”

O: Uh-huh, up until that point I had not!

[SS: Thundercracker points towards the glass cages filled with energon.]

S: So- so- so you see the things that are down at the bottom? Those all have health in them.

[Skywarp: What is it doing NOW?

Starscream: Who cares?  Just be ready for it!

Thundercracker: Evasive maneuvers!]

S: Those cages, with cubes.

C: Gotcha.

S: There's cages with cubes!

[SS: The lava begins rising.]

C & S: [laugh]

[CS: Skywarp stops flying and turns towards the cages.]

C: Oh, those things!  I see, she's right there totally health in them.  That’s a lot of health!

[CS: The glass floor panels begin to explode.]

O: I plan on- yeah.

[OS: The party flies around, trying to avoid the fireballs.]

S: I don't know what I'm supposed to do right now?

C: Just fly away.

S: [laugh]

C: We're waiting for the machine to open up.

 C: Essentially we're just dodging the fireball missiles.  Cuz, you know, Cybertron decided (logically speaking) the best way to purge viruses from its core-

[SS: The machine generates the double laserbeams, Thundercracker flies right though the center and takes damage but doesn’t immediately die.  But then he accidently transforms and falls into the lava.]

S: Goddammit! [laughs]

C: -was to have fireball missiles!

[SS: The Mission Failed screen appears.]

S: I- I’m sorry. [laughs] That was me.

[SS: The party spawns at the battle midpoint.]

O: Hey, at least- at least we have a checkpoint, okay.  At least we have a checkpoint.

[CS: Skywarp shoots some of the energon cages and picks up some health.

Skywarp: Now I’m all shiny again!]

C: [laughs] I’m all shiny again.

[Skywarp: What is it doing NOW?

Starscream: Who cares?  Just be ready for it!

CS: The lava rises and the glass panels begin to break.

Thundercracker: Evasive maneuvers!

CS/OS/SS: The party flies around the machine, avoiding fireballs.]

C: Evasive maneuvers, otherwise known as flying around in a circle.

S: [laughs]

C: These are top-tier strategies right here.

S: Yeah, just fly randomly and- [laughs]

C: [laughs]

O: Pray.

C: It’s genius!

S: [laughs]

C: Wait, who are we praying to?

O: [attempting to imitate Skywarp] “Hey, boss!  I’m a genius!”

[OS: The laserbeams activate.]

C: Uh, isn’t- who is it, Drift?  Is Drift a god?

S: No…

O: No, Primus- Rung is, dear.

C: Rung, yeah.

[OS: The laserbeams begin to rotate.

Megatron (COM): Starscream!  What is taking so long!

Starscream: Just a slight delay…

OS: Thundercracker is visible in the distance running into one of the laserbeams and getting cut in half.]

S: Oh, shit.  Shit, AHHH!

[OS: The game over screen displays.]

S: I got cut in half.

O: [laughs] I saw that.

A: [laugh]

[OS: Owls selects, “Restart From Last Checkpoint,” and the party spawns at the previous checkpoint.]

C: Okay, so Specs, I'm sure you know this but just to go over it strategically.

S: [laughs]

[Skywarp: What is it doing NOW?

Starscream: Who cares?  Just be ready for it!

CS: The lava rises and the explosions start happening.  The party flies around avoiding fireballs.

Thundercracker: Evasive maneuvers!]

C: You're doing great dodging the fireballs, but eventually when those blades come out they start very slowly.  You need to-

S: [still laughing] I knoooow!

C: Okay.

O: “I knoooow!”

C & S: [laughs]

O: What I’m getting from this is that Thundercracker is like, the worst flyer out of these three?

C: [laughs]

S: [laughs] Thundercracker is a scientist!

O: [laughs] So is Starscream, supposedly!  Apparently, his flight is affected by how much he wants a booty call.

O & S: [laugh]

C: I mean-

S: Granted, you know, probably part of my issue is that my mouse is, you know, a rollerball one.

[SS: The laserbeams come up just as Thundercracker is flying, and he manages to fly through the middle, only taking minor damage.  He stops once on the other side of the beam.]

C: Oh right, she's playing with that crazy rollerball- rollerball mouse.  That would be pretty hard.

[SS: The dual laserbeams begin moving.

Megatron (COM): Starscream!  What is taking so long!

Starscream: Just a slight delay...]

C: All right, now they're gonna start moving you need to slowly-

S: Yes! I am- I am zooming! [laughs]

O: I think you mean, “NYRMING”.

[Megatron (COM): I’m beginning to question your ability to deliver, Starscream.  Do not disappoint me!

O: Oh shit!

[OS: The laserbeams stop, and Starscream goes through the middle of them.]

S: Oh shit!  I can’t turn around!

[OS: The laserbeams begin moving in the opposite direction from before.  Starscream turns around but off in the distance Thundercracker goes through them.]

S: Oh, it didn’t kill me.  Shit!

[CS: Skywarp is attempting to get health from one of the energon cages but one of the laserbeams hits him and kills him.]

C: Are you kidding me?

[CS: The game over screen displays.]

O: ARGH!  Which of us died!?

C: That was me.

O: Oh my god it was you!

C: Yup.

O: I blame you!

[CS: The party restarts at the checkpoint.]

O: I went through the middle of them and didn't die, earlier!

C: Yup.

O: I was so proud of myself and this is what I have to deal with!

C: [sighs] I am so sorry.

[Skywarp: What is it doing NOW?

Starscream: Who cares?  Just be ready for it!]

S: And be aware that there is, in fact, Energon, or heal.

[OS: The lava begins to rise and blow up the glass panels below.  The party flies around avoiding fireballs.

Thundercracker: Evasive maneuvers!]

C: Yeah, no, that’s actually what got me killed.

O: That doesn’t help when you just get cut in half.

C: Um, I went in for the Energon and then, uh...

S: Then you died.

C: Yep.

S: [laughs] That happened to me.  That was like, not the most recent death but…

O: I did not need to get hit by the fireballs, thank you!

S: Good-bye, fireballs! [laughs]

C: [laughs]

S: [laughs] Sorry, for some reason I always find it really amusing when- when I die.

[SS: The laserbeams come up and Thundercracker isn’t able to stop in time and goes through them and then turns around and goes through them again, dropping his health below one bar.]

S: Ahhh!  Shhhit.

[SS: The laserbeams start moving as Thundercracker shoots one of the cages and grabs some energon.

Megatron (COM): Starscream!  What is taking so long!]

C: Okay, so they're gonna go clockwise and then when they turn off they go counterclockwise.

[SS: One of the laserbeams hits Thundercracker, but then stop.  Thundercracker turns around and starts heading the other direction.

Starscream: Just a slight delay...]

Megatron (COM): I’m beginning to question your ability to deliver, Starscream.  Do not disappoint me!]

S: Oh, okay, that happened.

C: Now turn around and go the other way.

[CS: The laserbeams begin moving in the opposite direction.]

C: And I don't know what they're gonna do after this you're on your own.

S: I’m gonna follow- ah!

[CS: Thundercracker runs into Skywarp.  The two turn around and begin to head the other direction.]

C: This isn’t bumper jets!

[OS: The beams split up again, with the top and bottom moving in different directions.  The two halves line up when they stop, Starscream tries to bank but accidentally transforms instead, falling into the lava.]

O: Oh shit- ARGHHH!

[OS: The game over screen displays.]

O: Dammit.

C: WELL-

O: Wait-

[OS: Owls selects Load from last checkpoint.]

C: Look who died!

O: Shut up.

S: [laughs]

O: Just shut up.

[OS: The party restarts at the checkpoint.]

C: Ahh, this is fun, isn’t this fun?

O: Shut up.

C: It is fun, I’m gla- I’m glad to be a part of this!

O: Shut up! [laughs]

[OS: New Objective, “Destroy the energon bridge guardian,” displays in the bottom right corner of the screen.

Skywarp: What is it doing NOW?

Starscream: Who cares?  Just be ready for it!]

S: I’m-

C: [laughs]

S: Pre-destroying shit now.

[Thundercracker: Evasive maneuvers!

SS: The lava rises and begins to destroy the glass panels.  The party flies around, avoiding fireballs.]

C: You gotta admit though, if these three guys were just normal scientists who decided to wake up one day and do all this, that's pretty badass.

S: Decide to just be evil.

O: Oh no!

[OS: Starscream is flying around near the lava with very little health.  He shoots an energon cage and picks up some health.]

C: No, well, that and fly down here and do all this crazy stuff.

S: Yeah.

[OS: The dual laserbeams appear.]

S: Oh!  Shhhit.

C: Oh crap!

C: I flew right into those blades.

S: Uh, shit.

[Megatron (COM): Starscream!  What is taking so long!

S: Okie dokie.

[OS: The beams begin moving.

Starscream: Just a slight delay...]

O: [snorts]

Megatron (COM): I’m beginning to question your ability to deliver, Starscream.  Do not disappoint me!

OS: The blades reverse direction.]

O: [snorts] I'm sorry, I don't know why I find that funny, but I do. [laughs]

S: Egh!

[SS: The top and bottom blades begin moving in opposite directions.]

S: It's like, I must now move!

[SS: Thundercracker boosts forward as the blades stop, narrowly missing them.]

S: But not too fast!  Shit!

[SS: The blades disappear and the machine exposes it’s core.]

C: We did it!  We did it!  Shoot that core!

[Starscream: The machine is vulnerable!  Focus your fire on the core!

OS: The core is destroyed.]

O: Oh thank freakin’ god!

S: Phew.  Fuck!

[OS: The machine folds in on itself and a black claw like mechanical things come out of the middle, seemingly infecting the lava with dark energon.  One of the arms goes up through the ceiling creating a hole.

Skywarp: Wait!  Something’s happening!

Starscream: YES!  It’s crumbling before the MIGHT of STARSCREAM!]

O: Is that what we're calling this?

[Starscream: To the surface, Decepticons!

OS: New Objective, “Escape to the surface,” displays in the bottom right corner of the screen.]

S: Uh, I guess we're supposed to go up there?

[OS: Starscream enters the tunnel from the created hole.  Dark energon appears to be causing black spikey structures to grow up through the tunnel as the party flies upwards.]

S: Uh, okay.

[Skywarp: The machine is out of control!

Thundercracker: It must be a side effect of the Dark Energon!]

C: Great shot kid, that was one in a million.

O: [snorts]

C: [laughs]

C: I can’t remember any of the other lines.

[OS: The party continues to fly upwards.]

S: Sorry, I only- I only sorta know where I’m-

O: Where you’re going?

C: Just fly up.  It's the Death Star, we're getting out of this thing.

[OS: An in-game cinematic plays, as the 3 Seekers exit to the surface of Cybertron, the black growths continue to grow into a platform below.  A large machine on 4 spider like legs begins to move.

Skywarp: We’ve done it!  The Energon Bridge is activating!]

S: It’s elephant toothpaste.

C: What!?

S: [laughs]

[Note: If you are as confused as we were this is elephant toothpaste. ~O]

[OS: The Seekers transform, landing on a nearby platform.

Thundercracker: Incredible.  The Energon Bridge is active once more.]

C: That's a bridge!?  That looks like a giant spider!

S: Kind of.

[Starscream: Quiet!  You’re ruining my moment of Glory!  Soon, my Orbital Station will be at full power!]

O: [screechy voice] Shut up twos!  A ten is talking! [laughs]

C: [laughs]

[Megatron: YOUR orbital station, Starscream?  Surely you mean MINE.

O: [snorts]

[Megatron: I see you have finally succeeded in the simple task I gave you.  Perhaps you’re not as worthless as I thought.  Report back to base--at once!

OS: The spider device activates, bringing energon up from below and sending it upwards towards the orbital station.  The three Seekers take to the air flying back to base.]

O: [volume has been reduced] Oww!

[A cinematic plays - the beam of energon bounces around between what appears to be multiple satellites before reaching the orbital station from the first chapter.  Soundwave gestures to the now online machinery.

Soundwave: All systems online.  Dark Energon manufacturing at optimal efficiency.]

S: Okay, so is that the end of that map?

O: I think so, but…

[Megatron walks up beside Soundwave.

Megatron: Now I can introduce Dark Energon into the planet’s core...and as it spreads throughout Cybertron, my power shall travel with it!

Soundwave: Entrance to the planet core is heavily shielded behind the Omega Gate.

Megatron: I will acquire the key.  We launch a full scale assault of Iacon IMMEDIATELY.  And wipe Zeta Prime and his pathetic Autobots off the face of the planet.

Megatron takes a holographic Cybertron in his hands and then crushes it.

The chapter ends, bringing everyone back to the main menu.]

C: I don't want to be a jet anymore!

O: Well, you don't have to be that's the only chapter with jets in it.

[Note:  Except the Autobot chapter later, whoops. ~O]

C: Okay, good, I like my feet on the ground.

O: Um, I-I think probably after this you'll be Soundwave.

C: Wait, I'll be Soundwave and not you?

O: Uh, no, because uh, Soundwave’s the healer.  Do you want me healing?  The answer is no.  I want my fusion cannon. [laughs]

C: Oh, right, right, right.

O: [laughs] I want my fusion cannon, hello!  Which is funny, because I actually prefer Soundwave in this game.  Like, character wise, to Megatron.

C: I make a good healer. [indignantly] I'm a- I'm a good healer!

O: [snorts] I didn't say you weren't, I said I was a bad one! [laughs]  So, to summarize thus far:  We've had a crack addict take over a space station to get to space crack.  We have had the crack addict’s new booty er, you know, boyfriend uh, arm candy?  I don’t know.  Uh, going into the planet’s core for a booty call in order to get that space crack running through the entire planet.  Does that sum it up? [laughs]

[Note: The Seekers were underground but not truly in Cybetron’s core. ~O]

C: I believe it does.

S: Scientist wants to impress his new booty call, so off he went with his two most dearly detested buddies.  Or something.

O: Apparently?  Co-workers, that were apparently down for this?  I don't know.

A: [laugh]

C: They’re his literal- eh, hold on- wa- wa- wait, no.  They’re his wing-men?  Aha!

O: ARGH!  I’m gonna go in the bedroom and throw something at you!

C: [laughs]

O: Okay, well, um, I think that rather nicely summarizes it.  Uh, next time we’ll do chapter 3: Iacon Destroyed.  Till next time, I'm Owls.

S: I'm Specs.

C: I'm Chezni.

O: And thanks for watching, bye!

S: Bye!