#weve known each other since the beginning. im glad to have him.

[thereprisesystem]

i am the most tired i have ever been and i want to reorganize the simply plural so badly because it is a goddamned mess. not happening. not falling asleep with this phone in my hand is like not feeling joy looking at a baby animal. here are my images 🤍❤️

[arysafics]

Now I’m Addicted

Chapter Eight

Normally, Clarke really looks forward to getting away to the beach for a weekend, just her and Wells. This year, the thought makes her queasy.

Clarke had been partly relieved to move make home with Wells. Living in a hotel had kind of sucked, and living alone was even worse. She still doesn’t know if she made the right decision. But she promised him she’d try, so she’s going to try.

And yes, it’s Bellamy she really wants, and not Wells. But she can’t have Bellamy. Bellamy doesn’t want her, and Wells does. So maybe she’s settling for second best, but it’s better than being alone for the rest of her life.

Despite her best intentions, and the fact that she really is trying, she’s not ready to go away with Wells alone. She’s worried the trip will just magnify all the holes in their relationship, before they’ve had a chance to really fix them. She doesn’t want to cancel the trip completely, so she suggests inviting a few other people to join them. Wells agrees surprisingly easily. Actually, he’s been very accommodating the past couple of weeks, almost like he’s walking on eggshells around her, afraid she’ll up and run again. But the truth is he doesn’t really have anything to worry about. Now that Clarke knows she has no shot with Bellamy, she has no reason to leave him. She wishes there was some way to prove that to him, so they can get start getting back to normal.

The beach house is huge, and Clarke thinks it’s probably worth a hell of a lot of money if Wells ever decides to sell it. Thelonius Jaha had left most of his money to charity when he died, but he left Wells the beach house. Not to sound selfish, but if Clarke’s mom does that, she’s going to be super pissed.

Clarke invites Octavia and Raven, and they both decide they’re bringing their partners. Monty and Harper can’t make it, and Jasper and Miller don’t want to hang around a bunch of couples for the whole weekend. So Clarke figures it’s going to be six people in the five bedroom house, with each couple getting their own bathroom. She’s actually looking forward to it.

But then she gets a call from Bellamy. She’s on the train home from work, and she almost drops her phone when she sees his name pop up. She dithers for a moment, her heart pounding, before she finally decides to answer.

“Hi,” she says, trying to sound as casual as possible.

“Clarke,” he says, and the sound of her name on his tongue makes her knees go weak.

“What’s up?” she asks him. He’s obviously calling for a reason. And that reason is probably not to tell her how madly in love with her he is, however many times she’s envisioned that scenario in her mind’s eye.

“Uh, well…” he starts. “Octavia asked me if I wanted to come to the beach with you guys this weekend.”

“Oh.”

“I mean, I figured I should check if it was okay with you first.”

“You really want to come?” Clarke asks. She kind of figured he was avoiding her.

“Yeah, if you don’t mind,” Bellamy says. “I could really do with a vacation,” he laughs. Clarke squeezes her eyes shut, her stomach twisting at the familiar sound of his laugh. How had she not figured out sooner that she was in love with him?

“Of course it’s fine,” Clarke says, because why wouldn’t it be? They aren’t sleeping together anymore, so they don’t have to worry about Wells. As far as either of them are concerned, they’re just distant friends. Or acquaintances maybe.

“Great,” Bellamy says. “Is it okay if I bring someone?”

Clarke hesitates, probably too long. “Sure,” she says quickly, hoping he hadn’t noticed her hesitation. No, she doesn’t want him to bring his girlfriend, and no, she doesn’t want to think about what it means that he’s only been dating Echo barely a month and yet he’s bringing her on a weekend away with all their friends.

“Okay. I guess I’ll see you Friday.”

“Okay,” Clarke swallows. “See you then.”

  The prospect of seeing Bellamy scares Clarke to death. She hasn’t seen him since A: she realised she was in love with him, and B: he broke her fucking heart. So yeah, she’s a little nervous to say the least.  

Wells doesn’t seem to notice, though she’s mostly silent on the drive to the beach house. Or perhaps he’s just letting her have her space. Either way, she’s glad he’s not questioning her about it. There’s only so many times a person can use the excuse I’m just tired before it starts to seem like a lie.

Clarke and Wells get there first and claim the master bedroom. Clarke unpacks her suitcase into the wardrobe, to keep herself busy. The task doesn’t really keep her mind off Bellamy though, and she keeps listening for a car in the driveway, her heart pounding rapidly.

Octavia, Niylah, Raven, and Shaw arrive together, and Clarke finally has a suitable distraction from her thoughts, as she’d introduced properly to Niylah for the first time, and Raven and Octavia start telling a story about The Worst Driver in the World they encountered on their way here.

She’s so caught up in Octavia’s theatrics, she doesn’t even notice at first when Bellamy and Echo walk in the front door. That is until Octavia cuts herself off midsentence to greet her brother.

“Hey, you made it!” she says, walking over and giving him a hug. Clarke freezes, her heart suddenly lodged in her throat. Bellamy’s eyes seem to scan over the group until they land on Clarke. She smiles weakly, feeling like a nervous wreck. Fucking hell, he looks so good. And if in the back of her mind she’d harboured some doubt about whether or not she’s actually in love with him, that vanishes when he smiles back at her, and her heart squeezes itself so tight she can’t breathe. Not only that, but he pussy starts to throb, as if it can sense he’s close. Yeah, letting him come here was a huge mistake.

“Bellamy,” Wells says, raising an eyebrow. “I didn’t know you were coming.”

Oops. She may have forgotten to tell Wells. Or rather, purposefully not told him because it was too hard to even say Bellamy’s name out loud.

“I did ask Clarke if it was okay,” he mentions.

“He did,” Clarke manages, finding her voice. “I guess I forgot to tell you.”

“All good, I guess. You’re here now. And who is this?” Wells nods to the tall brunette standing next to Bellamy. Clarke hates her on sight. With one glance at Octavia, Clarke can tell she isn’t impressed with the arrival of Echo either.

“Ah, this is my girlfriend, Echo,” Bellamy introduces. “Echo, this is… everyone.”

Hearing Bellamy call Echo his girlfriend sends a dagger through Clarke’s heart. And it’s not like she hadn’t known she was his girlfriend. But hearing him actually say it out loud is something else entirely.

“Girlfriend, huh, Blake?” Raven teases. “Seems like someone is finally settling down.”

Bellamy rolls his eyes. “Give it a rest, Raven. We’ve only been dating a month.”

“Only a month and she’s already your girlfriend though,” Raven continues. She turns to Echo. “I guess you’re the one to finally tame the wild beast,” she winks.

Echo smirks. “We’ll see,” she says, glancing at Bellamy flirtatiously. Bellamy looks a little uncomfortable by the whole exchange. Clarke wants to throw up.

“Who wants alcohol?” she announces, heading for the kitchen where Wells had stocked the fridge with beer and cider earlier.

They all end up in the outdoor area out the back of the house, drinks in hand and an array of finger foods on the table in front of them. Echo is sitting in Bellamy’s lap, playing with his hair, laughing too hard at his jokes. Clarke tries to keep her eyes averted, but she burns with jealousy. She wants to be the one sitting in his lap and playing with his hair, feeling his hard cock pressing into her, teasing him until he can’t think straight. She also wants to kick Echo in the face. Instead, she tightens her grip on her bottle of cider and snuggles into Wells’ side. It’s not because she’s trying to make Bellamy jealous. She’s not dumb enough to think he would even care. But she doesn’t want him to know how much she’s affected by his new relationship. So she’s a little more affectionate with Wells than she normally is. The alcohol probably helps.

“Who wants to play a drinking game?” Octavia asks.

“I’m in,” Raven says. “What are we playing?”

“You know, I think I’m a little old for drinking games,” Bellamy grimaces. He looks to Echo. “You want to go to bed?”

“You know I do,” Echo says, leaning in to kiss him.

“Gross,” Octavia says, voicing Clarke’s thoughts for her. “We won’t miss you.”

“Hey, you invited me,” Bellamy reminds her as he and Echo stand up. Clarke watches them head inside, hand in hand. To her surprise, Bellamy glances back for a moment and meets her eyes. She quickly looks away, pressing a kiss to Wells’ cheek. Overcompensating maybe. When she looks back to Bellamy, he’s gone.

“Clarke? Wells? You want to play?” Octavia asks.

“I actually think maybe we should go to bed too,” Clarke says. Somehow the thought of Bellamy and Echo alone in their room is worse than actually being able to see them together, and Clarke feels totally sober all of a sudden.

“Sounds good to me,” Wells grins. “See you guys in the morning.”

“Party poopers!” Raven calls after them as they go back inside.

Despite what Wells might think, Clarke’s intentions are just to go straight to sleep. Only, once she’s in her pyjamas, and under the covers, she begins to hear… noises through the wall. More specifically, the sound of Echo moaning like a mad woman.

Clarke groans, putting her pillow over her face as Wells gets into bed beside her.

“God, I hope we don’t have to listen to that all night,” he says. “Surely he can’t be that good in bed?”

Clarke knows for a fact that he is that good. Although Echo does sound completely ridiculous moaning like that. Clarke likes to think her own moans are much sexier. She does realise that even though she can hear Echo quite clearly, she can’t really hear Bellamy at all. She takes some satisfaction in the notion that maybe he’s not having as much fun with Echo as he did with Clarke.

Clarke turns over on her side to face Wells. “Fuck me,” she commands him.

“Huh?”

“You heard me.”

“Are you actually turned on by that?” Wells snorts.

“I just think we can outdo them.”

“Clarke, you’re not that loud in bed. I don’t think you can outdo Echo,” Wells rolls his eyes. “You know, that name actually suits her come to think of it.”

Clarke snorts. As much as she’d like to hang shit on Echo and her ridiculous name for the rest of the night, what she really wants is to get fucked. “I can be loud,” Clarke tells him. “Watch me.”

Wells doesn’t need to be told twice. And okay, pretty much all of Clarke’s noises are fake. But she’s pretty sure a lot of Echo’s are too. Sure, Bellamy is great in bed, but Echo sounds like she’s literally being murdered in the next room.

Clarke pretends to come when Wells comes, but even then, they can still hear Echo through the walls.

“How are they still going?” Wells asks incredulously. Clarke rolls her eyes.

“Let’s just go to sleep now, okay?” she huffs. She squeezes her eyes shut tight and tries to drown out the sounds of Echo.

  Clarke is awake early the next morning, long before anyone else will be up. Wells is still snoring softly next to her. It’s already warming up outside, and Clarke decides to take advantage of the solitude and go for a walk along the beach. She dresses in a pair of short shorts and a tank top and heads downstairs, stopping in the kitchen to grab a glass of water before she goes.

As she fills her glass at the sink, she looks out the kitchen window to see Bellamy lounging in the hammock on the front porch, reading, wearing nothing but a pair of shorts that Clarke swears are almost as tiny as her own. God, he’s so fucking sexy.

She lets herself watch him, his brow furrowed in concentration as he reads. She smiles to herself, her heart soft for him. So he has a girlfriend. She can still be in love with him and be his friend, right? It’s totally possible.

She puts down her glass and walks out onto the front porch. Bellamy looks up as the door slams behind her. He sits up, closing his book. His eyes rake over her body, lingering on her tits. She feels her clit twinge. So it’s not that he’s not attracted to her then.

“Hey,” she says. “I’m just going for a walk along the beach. Do you want to come?”

Bellamy considers. “Yeah, okay,” he agrees. He swings himself off the hammock, more gracefully than what Clarke would ever be able to manage, and follows her down the front steps.

They walk in silence towards the beach, Clarke with her hands in her back pockets for lack of something better to do with them. Because what she really wants to do is slip her hand into his. Or maybe just grab his face and kiss him.

It’s a five-minute walk until they reach the ocean, and it’s cooler out in the open air, and a little windy. The breeze blows through Bellamy’s already tousled locks, making him look like he’s in a beach themed photoshoot.

“So, uh, you and Echo, huh?” Clarke says. Why, she has no idea. She does not want to hear Bellamy gush about his girlfriend. “Seems like things are going well. If what I heard last night is anything to go by.”

Bellamy snorts. “You heard that, huh?”

“How could I not?”

“I will admit she’s a little over the top. If I didn’t know better, I’d think she was faking it sometimes,” Bellamy admits.

“And how do you know better?”

Bellamy smirks. “Come on, Clarke. Don’t pretend like I didn’t make you come over and over and over.”

Clarke shivers. Fucking hell, does he have to make her want him so bad? “So we’re talking about that are we?”

Bellamy shrugs. “We don’t have to. How are things going with Wells, now that you’re…?”

“Back together?” Clarke finishes for him. Bellamy stops, staring at her. His jaw ticks.

“Back together?” he repeats. Clarke’s eyes widen as she realises what she’s said. “I was going to say monogamous.” Bellamy swallows. “You and Wells broke up? When? I mean… Octavia never said—”

“She doesn’t know,” Clarke says quickly. Her face burns. “I didn’t tell anyone. So please don’t mention it. No one knows.”

“Okay,” Bellamy nods. He seems unable to look at her now. They continue walking.

“It was right after… you ended things with me. And it was only for like a week. I guess I just wanted to see if being with Wells was what I really wanted,” Clarke shrugs.

Bellamy turns his head towards her sharply, his eyes piercing into her. “And it is, then?”

Clarke swallows. “Yes.”

An uncomfortable silence follows. Clarke isn’t sure why. All she knows is she’s completely on edge, half of her desperate to confess everything to him, the other half desperate to hold onto her pride. The prideful side of her wins out.

“You want to go swimming?” she says. Anything to break the silence.

“What?”

“The water looks so nice,” Clarke continues. She tilts her head at him, waiting to see if he’s coming.

“I think I’ll pass,” he says. Clarke shrugs, as if to say suit yourself, and then she pulls her tank top over her head and her shorts over her ass. She can feel him watching her strip down to her underwear, and she’s totally not doing this to get a reaction from him, but if it turns him on too then she’s not complaining.

She looks back over her shoulder as she heads towards the water. He’s still watching her. She can’t help a smirk from spreading across her face.

The water is freezing, but Clarke forces herself to wade in anyway. She reaches her waist then dives under the water. She breaks the surface again, gasping from the cold, flicking her hair out of her eyes. She stands up, the water just reaching her breasts.  

“Come on!” she yells to Bellamy. “It’s not cold, I swear!”

“You’re lying!” he yells back, but he’s very clearly smiling.

“Don’t be such a chicken!”

Bellamy shakes his head, laughing. But then he’s walking towards her and into the water.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” Bellamy swears as he gets deeper. “It’s fucking freezing, Clarke!”

“It’s not that bad!”

He dives under the water and surfaces half a metre from her. “You’re insane,” he tells her.

“Yet you followed me anyway.”

“You’re too persuasive.”

Clarke pokes her tongue out, and then splashes him. Bellamy raises an eyebrow, smirking.

“Don’t start something you can’t finish, Griffin,” he challenges, stepping towards her.

“Oh, what are you going to do?” she teases. He lunges for her and she turns away, trying to escape his grasp half-heartedly, but he grabs her around the waist, pulling her back flush against his chest.

“No, don’t!” she squeals, laughing.

“Do you surrender?” he asks, lips against her ear. Clarke squirms, trying not to think about his wet skin against hers. But it feels like he’s touching her everywhere, and her head swims and her cunt pulses with need. She wonders if he’s hard right now, but she doesn’t dare make a move to find out.

“I surrender,” she tells him, and he lets her go. She turns around, but she doesn’t put any distance between them. His eyes flick to her lips and she wills him to kiss her.

“Clarke,” he says hoarsely. “I really want to kiss you.”

“So kiss me,” she murmurs.

Bellamy shakes his head. “I have a girlfriend, Clarke. I’m not going to cheat on her.” Right, Echo. “We should head back,” Bellamy sighs, stepping away from her. Disappointed, but knowing it’s better this way, Clarke follows him back up to the sand. She grabs her clothes from the ground but doesn’t put them back on yet.

“We should wash the salt and sand off before we go,” Clarke says, nodding her head towards the public bathroom by the carpark. There’s an outdoor shower around the side of the brick building. Clarke gets under first, and the water is cold but not as cold as the ocean. She closes her eyes to let the water fall over her face, and opens them to find Bellamy looking at her strangely.

“What?” she asks.

“You know your underwear is totally see-through right now, right?”

Clarke had not known, but when she looks down now, she can see that he’s right. The white material of her bra and panties clings to her, the water having turned them so transparent it’s like she isn’t wearing anything at all.

“Oh,” she says. “You’re right.” She looks back up at him. “You waited a long time to tell me that,” she points out. He must have noticed as soon as they got out of the water. And he definitely hasn’t been not looking at her.

Bellamy flushes. “Clarke—”

“I guess there’s no point in wearing them at all then,” Clarke shrugs. She reaches behind her to unclasp her bra and lets it fall from her chest. Then she peels off her panties and throws them to the side where her shorts and tank top sit.

“Fucking hell, Clarke,” Bellamy groans, shaking his head.

“We’re wasting water,” Clarke says, she reaches out and grabs his arm, tugging him into the shower with her. He’s stronger than her, he could resist easily, if he wanted to. He doesn’t.

He doesn’t move to touch her, but he’s so close that her nipples brush his chest, and he’s looking down at her with dark eyes, filled with want.

“Why are you like this?” he asks. Is that an insult or a compliment?

“Like what?”

“Irresistible,” he murmurs. His hands come to rest of her waist, and then he leans down, capturing her lips between his. Clarke whimpers as she closes her eyes, her arms circling around his neck. The water shuts off automatically, but Clarke barely notices. Bellamy presses her against the brick wall behind her, crushing her tits against his chest. He’s kissing her like his life depends on it, desperate and messy, like he’s trying to remind her she’s alive. She’d almost forgotten what it’s like to be kissed by him, and now that she remembers she doesn’t ever want him to stop again. She needs him to remind her how it feels to be fucked, really fucked. She wants him to fill her throbbing cunt with his cock, and come with him deep inside her.

“Bell, fuck me,” she moans. “I need you, I need you.”

“You need me, huh?” he says. “You need your pussy filled? You need my cock inside you?”

“Yes. Please. Please.”

“Of course you do, baby,” he murmurs, slipping a hand between her legs. “Bet you missed being fucked properly, didn’t you?”

“Uh huh,” Clarke nods as Bellamy plays with her clit. “I missed you so much.”

“Missed me? Or missed my cock?” He pushes two fingers inside her and she gasps.

“Both,” she moans. She tugs at his shorts, and he helps her pull them down to free his cock. “Oh god,” she groans. “I forgot how big it is. I need it inside me.”

“I know, baby, I know,” Bellamy coos. He kisses her again, gripping her ass, hoisting her up so she can wrap her legs around him.  He presses the bulging head of his cock against her entrance, and then he’s pushing inside her, stretching her pussy good and wide. Clarke almost comes right then.

Her back is against the bricks, and she clutches his back as he thrusts into her.

“Yes,” she gasps. “Fuck me, baby. Fuck me, fuck me.”

Bellamy moans and the sound sends shockwaves through her. He drives into her over and over, the pressure building inside her. She needs to come so bad, and she’s right there on the edge. I love you, she thinks. I love you, I love you. And it would be so easy to let it slip off her tongue right now, in this moment of bliss. But instead she just cries his name as she comes, her walls clenching around him as she comes all over his cock.

“Come inside me,” Clarke moans as he continues fucking her against the wall. “I need your come in me.”

“Anything you want,” Bellamy groans, letting his seed spill inside her, filling her up with his come. It leaks out of her as he pulls his cock out of her and lets her back onto the ground. Bellamy steps back, pulling his shorts back up, not bothering to clean himself up. She wonders if he’s feeling guilty. He grabs her clothes and hands them to her, and Clarke quickly puts her wet underwear back on and then her shorts and top. Bellamy looks away, as if he hadn’t just had his hands all over her naked body.

“Are you okay?” Clarke asks.

“Yeah, I’m okay,” Bellamy nods.

“What about Echo?”

Bellamy considers. “She doesn’t have to know.”