#well. given that i am not Here a lot. that isnt a lot of notifs to get BUT THE THOUGHT STILL COUNTS

[spearheadrampancy]

im sure this is going to get me shit but i dont really care. its been rattling around my head for a while

a long time ago i saw a post about how the internet is eurocentric. not in terms of "eurocentric beauty" but how the internet focuses on european stuff. i cannot disagree harder with that. i never understood it and every day i understand it less.

i have to go out of my way and have three weather/civil danger apps, two news apps, and two radio apps all with as many notifications on as possible just to even vaguely know what news is going on in my own country. i havent used twitter in something like years because i kept getting minor news from the states even when i had set my interests to not news, and not america. the uk dialect has specifically and noticably changed because how much of america is all over the internet.

every single time i see a post about how "england's much better than the us, they have the nhs!" i almost break down in tears because it just proves how disproportionally american the internet is. americans do not hear about how waiting times for ambulances are easier tracked in HOURS than in minutes. americans do not hear that the urgent medical referral (for cancer) process is supposed to take 2 weeks and the normal referral (any other type) process is supposed to take 18 weeks, yet even before covid and lockdown, urgent referrals were taking over a year. i was given an urgent referral in april 2019. i havent even received my letter saying i am on the triage list. i dont even know what the normal referral wait time is anymore. i was supposed to be given a normal referral also in 2019 for my joints and my gp said "because we live in an area with a lot of older patients, the normal orthopaedic wait time is over 2 years. i will refer to another department as they will be able to triage you quicker". there's countless stories too of mothers with BABIES being unable to get the only lifesaving treatment the kid's condition needs on the nhs, because it's just... not available on the nhs. and nobody but the rich can afford private healthcare. there are no low-tier private healthcare options here. because "well if you cant afford our premium care, use the nhs (:"

the nhs isnt functional. it doesnt work. and the government, instead of fixing it, is considering getting rid of it. do you know how many people will die from this. do you realise this is a very bad situation for us here in the uk. im so fucking tired of americans acting like we have it perfect. we dont. people are dying and they will continue to die. im so tired. im tired of being scared.

[cinnaminsvga]

I think it’s kinda funny how quite a few of us kinda just distanced ourselves from the fandom space and stuff but we still come back here to you haha

Idk how to describe it aside from parasocial bullshit haha but (and I hope this doesn’t bother u or make it feel like an obligation or anything;;) ur presence (?) is v homey?? I’ve been here since a little bit before tlhc when outcast was a thing I think ??? And idk I just find myself coming back every so often to read your stuff even when I don’t listen to kpop as much anymore just because I love your writing and just in general I love your sense of humor

like others have mentioned I find myself thinking abt you (fondly) like when I see cheese in their ramen or when I see churros and yoobie ofc hehe

anways idk I just wanted to say ur very appreciated and ik a lot of us just enjoy your presence in general ((I have ur notifs on from way back when and I can’t bring myself to turn them off so whenever this sort of topic comes up I find myself wanting to just word vomit sappy shit haha))

I care u vv much ms zee I hope ur taking care of ur self and doin stuff that makes you happy <33

FHEKDJWJW BELIEVE ME im literally so amazed that i still gets some asks and other interactions on this blog despite how mia i’ve been 🫠 like wow i exist in your mind?? even when i’m not currently present?? object permanence is a thing?? but thank you fr for still checking in on me despite how much less i’ve been present online ;w;

i’m??? homey to you??? PLEASE that is so sweet of you to say like??? honestly i know i joke around a lot and i try not to take a lot of things too seriously but it’s so nice to know that i am perceived positively by a stranger,,, because for all intents and purposes, i’m just a writer who posts silly little fics and there really isn’t any reason for any of you to like me more than just for my writing, and saying that you like me??? for more than that??? is always such a mind-boggling revelation so thank you very much you are the sweetest ;w;

I CARE YOU TOO!! IT IS SO NICE TO READ YOUR MESSAGES MY LOVELY ANON YOU GOT ME FEELING THINGS ON A SATURDAY EVENING!! THE GRINCH’S HEART GREW FOUR TIMES TODAY!! ILY!!

[seijch]

ANNOUNCEMENT: NOT A HELLO, BUT NOT A GOODBYE EITHER

omg hi ... im like . ashamed to come back after saying brief hiatus in october and then disappearing off the face of the earth til FEBRUARY but under the cut i will be explaining myself and the following, if youre interested (and a tl;dr at the very bottom if you don’t wanna scroll thru this obnoxiously long post):

the reason(s) i was gone for so long

what i was doing during that time (its just a personal account yall can scroll past this idrc)

the status of those um . halloween requests

the future of this account

i. so . Hiatus .

i know. i know . i probably mentioned it when i made the announcement post, but my mental health likes to go on one of those rides. yknow the ones where you go like up rlly fast then down maybe and then up then DOWN .... its like that. i needed a break and every time i wanted to come back or thought about it, something would happen and i would get stuck in my own head.

a big reason for getting stuck in my head was (and i hate to admit this ... i hate to admit that i have Insecurities On The Internet) my feelings of inadequacy regarding my writing. i love to plot fics, i love concepts and characters and making little headcanons but i dont ... know if i love writing rn. and i thought for the longest time that like . whatever ill just push thru it its fine ill be fine but it kinda wasnt lmao you can kinda see it in my halloween reqs and what become of them when i get to that but i began to feel like nothing i had put out or would put out would hold up prose wise (and normally i dont feel like this im much more “idc its my life im living it” but thats not a rant for tumblr LMAO). i still feel like that -- like im better as a reader than a writer. but . You Know :-)

tl;dr: mental state go brrrrr

ii. anywhere here’s wonderwall

when i left, i was in a steadily decreasing mental and emotional state, made worse by a situation at work that really was a case of petty jealousy on my end and rlly isnt very consequential now despite how much pain and resentment it gave me when it Was a problem so i wont get into it. the tl;dr of november and december was me using work as an crutch and distraction -- i know my job, i do it well, it helped me not think about my responsibilities and obligations and inadequacies. of course, as the holiday season grew busier n busier i was scheduled so often that i moved 88 or so miles (according to my apple watch, which i ONLY wear at work since im never anywhere else outside my house) and fell into a cycle of showering n sleeping at my house before going back the next day. (theres definitely something to be said abt capitalism and “grind culture” here but once again its not the time or place snsjkdfds)

at the turn of the new year, i happened to remember a birthday card i hadnt filed away for safekeeping from a friend of mine that id been horribly out of touch with til that point. i started crying because i realized how out of touch id been in general up until that point. the month of january was great for me: i was focused, happy, and in a much better place than i had been before. the end of it brought me down focus wise and im hoping that enough time away from my distractions will refocus me bc i ... need it LMAO and though ive burned out from that level of productivity and gotten distracted again im ... trying to stay positive which i think is the most i can do 😁👍🏼

media wise, i got real into stardew valley (but burned out bc i played it extensively as a way to wind down after work), the pokemon platinum romhack renegade platinum (still havent finished it bc of school n i played it w the intent to see if i could nuzlocke it ... bitch its so hard but its so fun bc of it), briefly assassins creed: odyssey (im one of those ppl who completes an entire region before i move to the next so you can tell i burned out of that one + wouldnt have the time to properly devote to it even if i didnt), got back into genshin impact after pulling for xiao (after not touching it for like . months), and danganronpa. yes . danganronpa 😐 i Know. i stopped playing it after the second trial of the first game bc i was so hurt by the outcome and picked it up in late january only to get sucked in (thank god i had the foresight to buy the second and third games during the steam winter sale). rn im at the start of chapter 4 if anyone wants to come in my asks and um . talk to me abt danganronpa

tl;dr: I’m Into Danganronpa Now

iii. you realize halloween was three months ago right

i mentioned this in the first section, but i love to plot things. every request is plotted or at least has a solid foundation. i had fun detailing what concept i wanted to go with considering what i was given, and there were some bangers i might touch up in the future. but heres whats going to happen to the requests themselves:

there are two finished requests. one will be posted tomorrow and the other will be touched up (just bc i finished it doesnt mean its good 🧍‍♂️) and scheduled for next saturday. as for the ones i never got around to ...

i will not be finishing those requests. i hate to be That Person, but i feel like we all expected this 🧍‍♂️ what i will do is post all of my notes for each request in batches -- requests that have an @ to go with them will be mentioned in the post proper, but anon asks will be pictured. (there are some asks that came from blogs who are now deactivated but i wrote down all the prompts and remember most of those askers so ill cross that bridge when i get there) there will most likely be an excerpt or two simply bc i think i mightve written a few plot points or interactions in the form of bullet points. i rlly am sorry about doing this but i remember looking at my notion doc with all the prompts and feeling ... like i wasnt measuring up n it wasnt just to myself or to some intangible concept of “other” id constructed but it was instead to those who requested n actually WANTED to see and hear and read my writing and i ...... im gonna admit thats another big reason i avoided this site.

regardless, youll definitely get what i have (and likely more than just my bullet points and illegible handwriting).

tl;dr: im sorry. what i have in terms of plot, concept, and interaction for every request will be posted, but i cant say ill ever complete them and mean it.

iv. so what now?

well i mean . im not entirely sure how sold i am on haikyuu in the content creation department (as a creator n to a lesser extent, as a consumer). as mentioned previously, its no longer my primary focus. it doesnt mean im not into haikyuu anymore; i have a lot of love for those boys but i cant rlly say im even caught up w recent fandom activity and also havent even finished s4 pt2 LMAO thats on my to do list

and despite all that, i still want to share my plots n concepts and snippets and maybe even fics. it wont happen anytime soon. it might not even happen. but i mean . its better than me saying i wont write ever again shjdkfs but either way ill probably use this blog as a personal blog w the occasional ask game for dialogue prompts (those are always so fun i love making up aus to fit like . the most mundane prompts)

as for my works (past and any potential future), ive opened an ao3 acc here n ill be editing n possibly expanding on my old works to post there. tumblr, to me, is The x reader hub, but i figure more x reader fics on ao3 is never a bad thing.

ill be deleting/posting drafted posts to the queue since they were all meant to be queued anyway as well as (sorry again 🧍‍♂️) deleting or answering asks in the inbox. (moots if you get a notif from me saying i rbed your post from months ago ... mind your business) im very hard to get ahold of and its ... a problem. expect an overhaul of the nav n shit to reflect my new direction n also because i feel like i cant tell if my passion for carrd is shared by the majority HSDKLFS maybe its better to read my info in a normal post ykwim .......

and of course . if youve read all this n decided im no longer worth the follow, i sure as hell cant stop you. thank you for wanting to, at some point, hear what i have to say -- it means more than you think.

tl;dr: writing will be edited and reposted to ao3, this blog will be a personal blog with a hint of writing (sometimes)

the tl;dr to end all tl;drs:

im back! i wont be as active as i used to due to a lessened interest in haikyuu in general, but i have an ao3 acc now where all my past work will be edited, possibly expanded, and reposted. any future work will also find itself there. my halloween requests will be posted in batches as incomplete concepts, plots, and snippets of scenes; i wont be promising to finish any of them.

there are still fic concepts im attached to and want to finish, but i cant promise any more writing on my end. this blog will be a personal blog with maybe writing, not a writing blog with my personal thoughts all over it.

regardless if you stick around or not, its been crazy sexy cool (equal emphasis) being on haikyuu tumblr even tho i wasnt around for long ... even tho its not my main focus anymore, im still excited to see what the future might hold 🤝

love, ari 💌

[arachnrd]

ABOUT :

- My interpretation is primarily based on the first Insomniac Spider-Man game and its DLCs, along with the prequel book Hostile Takeover and heavily featuring my own headcanons. Personally,  I don't agree with the takes in the Insomniac verse based comics, nor what they've done to Peter's character in the Miles Morales game ( including the change they made to his appearance they can completely miss me on that ), so we're just not gonna touch that here. No judgment or hate at all if you like any of that, or any of the other interpretations to Peter's character,  this is just my personal preference and my portrayal. If you don't agree, feel free to move along.

- I wont accept hate over my takes on Peter's / Spider-Mans character, or theft of my headcanons, graphics, or anything I definitively create myself. And while I dont condone cancel culture or anything of the sort, I will not hesitate to bring that behavior to light if it's consistent. Im here to have fun, not deal with nonsense over a fictional character.

- Im not a huge fan of the MCU. Im fine with interactions with other MCU based muses, but may be selective about it and will want to talk things out before hand.

- I dont associate with the Marvel fandom, particularly here on tumblr. The original reason I left this blog back in 2019 was due to the community being heavily toxic and drama mongering, and as a result will not only not tolerate any drama or toxicity, but will be a bit selective and cautious on who I interact with from that side of the rpc.

- Unless it's established in the source material, or plotted out with me, your muse will not know Peter is Spider-Man. Im not touching giving muses ex - machina knowledge of others without it being discussed or signed off on by both parties, period.

- I will NOT interact with blogs that use youtubers, social media influencers, or anime / drawn characters for their Fcs [ Comic centered blogs I'll be selective about ] . Nothing against you, it’s just not my thing.

- I will NOT follow OC's with no bios or abouts up; Hard to know if our character's can interact if there's no info.

- I will block personal blogs that reblog or follow, as I like to keep interactions here between fellow rp mutuals.

- I may want to explore more adult aspects to Peter's character, so that, along with being an adult myself, means Im simply more comfortable interacting with those of age and will not follow or interact with minors, please respect this.

- Unless it's something applicable to our muses collectively, Please reblog memes or posts in general from the source. I'm not a resource blog and if treated as one, especially by blogs who never interact, I will soft block.

- As stated this blog is MUTUALS ONLY, meaning i will only write with mutuals. if i dont follow back there’s genuinely no hard feelings, I just get very overwhelmed with an overly busy dash and need to be a bit selective to prevent my anxiety from going nuts. you’re more than welcome to unfollow. though its very much a mutual thing; if you want to interact but dont follow me, chances are I’ll say no as I take following as a sign of interest. I may take a while to follow back as my notifications on here are the worst. If I don’t follow back within a weeks time, feel free to unfollow.

- This blog is multi-verse. Despite being set within the narrative of the game, I can incorporate elements from the movies and comics ( Mostly from the Ultimate comics since thats what I'm most familiar with and have actually read), such as dynamics between characters, etc if your muse isnt in the game. Not to mention love creating verses with writing partners. BUT, my Peter will still be played as the ps4 version of his character.

- I dont pretend to know every Marvel character. Or even ALL the characters from the Spider-man comics to their finest detail. For that my knowledge is going to be straight from whatever info you give and wikis.

SHIPPING / RELATIONSHIPS

- I ship based on chemistry between muses, but Im also very okay with pre established dynamics (whether that be romantic, enemies, platonic, familial ( though this Ill be a bit selective about ), whatever!) Considering that can be a bit easier thread wise for some people instead of starting from the very beginning. As with most things, I like to talk through it beforehand. If you have anything in mind, you're more than welcome to approach me! But I also reserve the right to respectfully turn things down or offer alternate options if things dont mesh.

SMUT

- I will not write smut on tumblr. So for the most part any if it all suggestive scenes will lead to a fade to black or time skip.

M U N

- i am a-okay with questions, especially about my muse! if you have any about anything at all i will be more than happy to answer them the best i can! Also totally fine with random IMs even if we havent talked before so hmu.

- I write under the alias Nox! ( She/Her ) and I am of age.

R U L E S / O T H E R

THREADS / PLOTTING:

- I love plotting. If given my way I'd be plot exclusive but I know that's not everyone's cup of tea. If you're ever interested in plotting, know I am already onboard.

- If you want to turn a meme or ask into a thread, I’d prefer to be asked before hand. Simply because sometimes its nice to have memes just be stand alone things or for fun.

- Additionally I take the memes I send in to others as just memes for memes sake as well, so if you want a thread to continue off one you'll have to let me know , otherwise I'm clueless.

RESPONSE TIME/ ACTIVITY:

- My activity may be a bit sparse. As it is I have a hard time keeping muse, just the way I am sadly. i know this is something a lot of people, myself included, can find frustrating (especially when you’re really into a thread) but a fair amount of the time i may take a while to respond. As much as I love this, aside from being a hobby, and having a very unreliable laptop, I have a chronic illness that makes me exhausted most days or just not in the mood to write and not in any kind of state to type out a response you lovely people would deserve. though i will always try to quickly reply when i can. Please be patient. If you ttry to harass or guilt me into a response, I wont hesitate to soft block for my own sanity. Im here to have fun and write when the mood strikes.

MEMES:

- Yes. please. send as many as you want, as often as you want. Even if we haven’t interacted, you’re free to send one my way; They can be a great place to start things off.

POST LENGTH:

- You don’t have to match my length in posts! sometimes i can write far too much when i get really into writing (and alternatively not write enough), so don’t feel obligated or pressured to follow suit by any means! whatever you are comfortable with is totally okay! it’s not a contest, this is all for fun.

GRAPHICS:

- ALL icons will be from the game/ with the exception of live icons of Peter's first ingame face model that I managed to scrape together. Comic icons will not be used.

- all icons and graphics are created by me unless stated otherwise

- PSD by plutocomissions

[cocosnoodle]

got tagged by @glitterslither and almost didnt see the notification! thanks tumblr. 

Five Things You’ll Find in My Bag: Medications. My wallet, with a drivers license im too poor to make use of. A knife, normally. I’m rarely unsafe, but i do not have much trust in people. My phone, but im sure thats a given. although its very noticeable, i’ve got a nice clunky case so i can use my phone as a brick to hit someone without damaging my phone (only half joking). and some form of entertainment otherwise. usually my 3ds, sometimes a manga volume. 

Five Things You’ll Find in My Bedroom: I was going to make a generalization that would encompass too many things, but i’ll separate them. Lots of adolescent-aimed books. i used to be a bookworm and no matter how many times i got rid of books i knew i didnt need, i still have 3 bending shelves. Swords. One wooden anime replica, and two real ones. Snake tanks, of course. im shocked i can fit everything in here with them. Plush animals. I am 21 years old and will not let them go. Its the same situation as the books, I’ll put some in storage (my garage) but wont let enough leave my room. And ocarinas. i have 4, used to be able to play them. been too long though. 

Five Things I Want to Do With My Life: I definitely aspire to be a snake breeder one day. I know im not there yet, but one day. I want to make a good wife to someone. I never think of myself this way, but my current partner has inspired in me the desire to be such a thing. I want to be proud of myself. I think i’ll cut this answer off here, this is my snake blog. i dont like being so deep. 

Five Things I’m Into Right Now: Pokemon, as always. I’ve been experimenting with themed teams, such as a really weird doubles combo i heard of once, and it works. Monogatari. Its a really weird anime series, animated in a way that you really only notice what a novel would describe, but its really good. i recommend it if you can get used to it. Furry art. Also Digimon, the new game (digimon world: next order) is out and im enjoying it. Oh, and kookburras. the weird australian birds, i find them fascinating. but unlike my snakes, i dont think i’d be suited to have one ever. reason in the last answer. 

Five Things on My To-Do List: 1- Get that internship in my field. gonna be a computer technician, which i plan to use to save money to move to a place where i can become a snake breeder. 2- get Coco eating again. damn hognoses and winter fasting. i love her and i miss her but rules say i cant touch her aside from check ups until her fast is over. 3- perfect my fried chicken recipe. i did it well but under cooked it today, im afraid i might be sick because of it. 4- get my ass to sleep. 5- learn to care for myself the way i care for my animals. 

Five Things People Don’t Know About Me: As promised, i will share why i dont think i could care for any bird. im afraid of handling birds. the little ones seem so fragile, the big ones are so pointy. so its either im afraid of hurting it, or im afraid of having my eyes pecked out, fingers bit off, or otherwise. im especially kinky too. to the point the better question is “what doesnt turn me on?” as long as its not in the realm of obscure fetishes. i still have my middle school artwork hanging on my room walls. i feel like i did better art back then and only midway through high school. past that point i lost passion, and now i lost practice. even though a lot fo it looks crappy since it was before i recieved any instruction, i feel like i was happier with it. i also sufferend insomnia so bad for 2 years of my life that i was hallucinating every day at the ages 11-13. and lastly, me and my boyfriend are in an open relationship, but we dont act on it much at all. he is suprised because before me he was a classic fuckboy, but me not acting on it isnt as surprising. 

as i said, this is my reptile blog. but i’ll tag people i know from my main blog, deidarakoroski, since im sure the reptiblrs i follow are already in this chain. @r0xx0rz @frenchifries @shouty-nubs @meowsee @anxiouskazoo

[fearlesschris2215]

AN OPEN LETTER TO TAYLOR SWIFT TAYLOR NATION & SWIFTIES WORLDWIDE

GOOD EVENING EVERYONE! IM CHRIS! RESIDENT OF PARSIPPANY NEW JERSEY & I COME TO YOU WITH NOT SO MUCH OF AN ANNOUNCEMENT JUST SOMETHINGS I WANT TO GO OVER AS WE ARE JUST ABOUT LESS THAN ONE MONTH AWAY FROM FOUR YEARS OF ME BEING IN THE TAYLOR SWIFT FANDOM & WHEN I STARTED OUT I WILL ADMIT THAT I WAS VERY SHY ABOUT BEING A SWIFTIE BUT MORE ON THAT LATER! I DID NOT HAVE A TWITTER TUMBLR & INSTAGRAM AT THE TIME SO I WAS JUST DOING MY OWN THING & NOT MUCH WENT ON SINCE IT WAS JUST ME & EVENTUALLY I GOT BORED! HOWEVER IN THE FALL OF TWENTY FOURTEEN WHEN THE NINETEEN EIGHTY NINE WORLD TOUR WAS ACCIDENTALLY ANNOUNCED ON THE ELLEN SHOW I REALIZED THIS WAS MY CHANCE TO SEE TAYLOR SWIFT LIVE FOR THE FIRST TIME I DIDNT GO TO THE RED TOUR SINCE IN THOSE EARLY DAYS I ALWAYS FELT EMBARRASSED TO ADMIT I WAS A FAN OF TAYLOR SWIFT BUT IN LATE TWENTY FOURTEEN I NO LONGER FELT THAT WAY & ONCE I STARTED FOLLOWING MORE ACCOUNTS DURING SWIFTMAS THAT ALSO FOLLOWED ME ALONG WITH STARTING A TUMBLR ACCOUNT A MONTH LATER IN THE NEW YEAR I FELT MORE OPTIMISTIC AND HOPEFUL THAT PERHAPS I COULD MEET TAYLOR SWIFT HERSELF OF COURSE THAT IS NOT THE REASON I JOINED THE FANDOM LATER IN 2015 WHEN LOFT EIGHTY NINE WAS A THING I BECAME MORE OPTIMISTIC THAT MY TIME COULD COME REAL SOON SINCE I WAS ALREADY PLANNED TO GO TO ONE SHOW WITH MY MOTHER THAT JULY! WHILE THE TOUR WAS IN PROGRESS IN ITS INITIAL LOCATIONS FELLOW FANS & MYSELF WOULD ENGAGE IN VARIOUS FUN ACTIVITIES ON SOCIAL MEDIA SUCH AS SING-ALONGS PICTURE CHALLENGES FINISHING LYRICS & MORE! & WE ALL HAD A GREAT TIME DOING THOSE TOGETHER & WHEN THE FALL CAME I WAS REALLY BUMMED THAT I WOULD NOT BE ABLE TO DO THAT AS MUCH SINCE I WAS ABOUT TO START MY FIRST YEAR IN COLLEGE BUT THAT IS THE LIFE THAT WAS CHOSEN FOR ME SO I HAD NO OTHER CHOICE! HOWEVER ONE AFTERNOON THE COMPANY I HAVE BEEN WONDERING OF THEY WOULD EVER NOTICE ME TAYLOR NATION WHICH ARE A GROUP OF PEOPLE THAT HELP FANS MEET TAYLOR SWIFT ACTUALLY DID NOTICE ME & IT WAS SUCH A GREAT FEELING FOR THAT TO HAPPEN I THOUGHT THAT MOMENT WAS ONLY JUST THE BEGINNING OF MORE TO COME! UNFORTUNATELY I WASNT PREPARED FOR WHAT WAS TO COME! DAY IN AND DAY OUT I WOULD TRY AND TRY AGAIN TO SEE IF THEY WOULD REMEMBER ME & HOPEFULLY BUILD ON THE RELATIONSHIP! MONTH AFTER MONTH I TRIED! I EVEN TRIED TO SEE IF I COULD GET TAYLOR SWIFT TO NOTICE ME ALSO! BUT IF YOU HAVE BEEN FOLLOWING ME FOR AWHILE YOU PROBABLY KNOW ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED IN MARCH! TAYLOR NATION HELD A GIF CHALLENGE PARTY FOR FANS ON TWITTER & I WENT TO THEIR PAGE & I SAW THE ONLY FANS THEY WERE NOTICING THAT EVENING WERE JUST FANS WHO EITHER HAD A PROFILE PICTURE OF HIMSELF OR HERSELF MEETING TAYLOR SWIFT OR HAD A HEADER WITH NOTIFICATIONS FROM WHEN TAYLOR SWIFT NOTICED HIM OR HER ON TUMBLR! AT THAT MOMENT I WAS HEARTBROKEN! I REALIZED THAT I JUST DIDNT HAVE THE QUALIFICATIONS TO BE NOTICED BY TAYLOR NATION ANYMORE NO MATTER HOW MUCH I SUPPORTED TAYLOR! FROM THAT POINT ON I JUST NO LONGER CARED WHETHER I WOULD BE NOTICED BY TAYLOR NATION AGAIN OR NOT BUT I STILL TRIED WITH TAYLOR SWIFT! LATER ON LAST YEAR I STARTED SEEING FANS JUST SHOWING UP OUT OF NOWHERE WHENEVER TAYLOR SWIFT OR TAYLOR NATION IS ONLINE. AND ALL THOSE FANS DO IS TRY TO GET THEIR ATTENTION WHICH IS FINE IF YOU RECEIVED NO OR VERY LITTLE ATTENTION FROM THEM BEFORE! SO I WENT TO THESE FANS PROFILES AND SAME THING PROFILE PICTURES OF THEM MEETING TAYLOR SWIFT OR HEADERS WITH NOTIFICATIONS FROM WHEN TAYLOR SWIFT NOTICED THEM ON TUMBLR & YET THOSE FANS ALWAYS GOT THE ATTENTION WHEN THEY HAVE BEEN GIVEN SO MUCH & THEY DONT SEEM TO HELP ANYONE WHO RECEIVED NONE OR LITTLE ATTENTION! THEREFORE THROUGHOUT THE SUMMER BETWEEN TAYLOR'S BREAKUPS AND THE WHOLE KIM THING I TRIED TO TELL THESE SWIFTIES TO EITHER LEAVE TAYLOR ALONE OR FIGHT BACK DEPENDING ON THE SITUATION! COURSE IT'S NOT MY JOB BUT YOU WOULD BE SURPRISED AS TO WHAT YOU SEE ONLINE WHEN STUFF LIKE THAT HAPPENS! HOWEVER ONE THING I WAS PROMINENT IN DOING ON SOCIAL MEDIA DURING THE SUMMER AND FALL OF LAST YEAR I STARTED WARNING OTHERS ABOUT TAYLOR NATION FOR HOW THEY MADE ME FEEL IN MARCH THAT SAME YEAR! I ALWAYS BOASTED TO NOT TRUST THEM! THEY MAY JUST FORGET YOU EXIST AND THROW YOU INTO OBLIVION EVEN IF YOU SUPPORT TAYLOR SWIFT! & IN THE FALL I NOTICED A LOT OF FANS JUST BOASTING ABOUT HOW THEY MET TAYLOR IN TEXAS OR WHENEVER INSTEAD OF HELPING SOMEONE WHO NEVER GOT TO EXPERIENCE ANYTHING THEY DID & AMONG OTHER THINGS THAT I WILL NOT GET TO EXPERIENCE EITHER! THAT DROVE ME TO BECOME AN HONEST TAYLOR SWIFT FAN! SOMEONE WHO IS OPENLY HONEST WITH HIS OPINIONS ABOUT TAYLOR SWIFT TAYLOR NATION & HER FANS & NOT MANY FANS WERE FOND OF THAT! IN FACT I WAS BULLIED FOR THAT! YES I WAS BULLIED BY OTHER FANS SINCE MY OPNION DID NOT MATCH THEIR OPINION! & THAT IS FINE SINCE MY OPINION ORIGINATES FROM SOMETHING I EXPERIENCED WHERE THEY EXPERIENCED SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT WHICH IS WHY OUR OPINIONS ARE DIFFERENT! BUT THERE IS NO NEED TO FIGHT ME FOR THAT! THINK OF IT THIS WAY! LETS SAY YOURE A MODEL & YOURE IN THE STREETS THEN SUDDENLY SOMEONE JUMPS ON YOU OUT OF NOWHERE! YOU DEFEND YOURSELF BY PUNCHING THE PERSON WHO JUMPED YOU! THEN OUT OF NOWHERE YOU HAVE ARTICLES WRITTEN ABOUT YOU & PEOPLE GANGING UP ON YOU FOR NOT FOLLOWING MODEL BEHAVIOR! LET ME TELL YOU THERE IS NO MODEL BEHAVIOR! IF YOU FEEL THE NEED TO DEFEND YOURSELF SO BE IT! THERE IS NO RULESET FOR HOW A MODEL SHOULD BEHAVE JUST AS THERE IS NO RULESET FOR HOW A TAYLOR SWIFT FAN SHOULD BEHAVE! NO ONE SHOULD TELL YOU OR ANY FAN WHAT IS ALRIGHT & NOT ALRIGHT TO SAY! YOU HAVE A VOICE & IF YOU FEEL SOMETHING IS NOT RIGHT BASED ON YOUR EXPERIENCE THEN SPEAK UP ABOUT IT! HOWEVER A TAYLOR SWIFT FAN BASICALLY SAID TO ME THE OTHER DAY THAT IF ALL I AM GOING TO DO IS TEAR DOWN TAYLOR NATION THEN I COULD JUST LEAVE SINCE THAT MAKES ME UNLOYAL TO TAYLOR SWIFT! HERE IS THE THING! IM NOT TRYING TO TEAR ANYONE DOWN! IM JUST EXPRESSING MY HONEST OPINION ABOUT THE COMPANY BASED ON MY PERSONAL EXPERIENCE WITH THEM! & HOW AM I UNLOYAL TO TAYLOR SWIFT IF I SAID NOTHING BAD ABOUT HER? AFTER ALL THOSE FANS GANGING UP ON ME SINCE MY OPINION IS DIFFERENT FROM THEIR OPINION GUESS WHAT? I STILL SUPPORT TAYLOR SWIFT NONETHELESS! BUT THAT SAME FAN SAID SOMETHING TO ME THAT I WAS ABOUT TO MAKE AN HONEST OPINION ABOUT! BUT THEN I REALIZED SOMETHING! INSTEAD OF FANS FIGHTING ME LET ME JUST SAY SOMETHING ELSE! I JUST WANTED TO SAY THAT AFTER MARCH LAST YEAR I WANTED TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE IN THIS FANDOM! TO RETURN TO THE ROOTS WHERE EVERYTHING WAS RANDOMIZED AND FAIR FOR EVERYONE! BUT AFTER THE RECENT NIGHTS WHERE NUMEROUS FANS WHO ARGUED AGAINST ME SIMPLY BECAUSE THEY GOT TO EXPERIENCE SOMETHING ONE OR FIVE MORE TIMES THAN MYSELF ALONG WITH MILLIONS OF OTHER FANS NEVER WILL GET TO EXPERIENCE! I CAME TO REALIZE MAKING THAT DIFFERENCE IN THIS FANDOM IS NOT POSSIBLE! SINCE THAT ISNT POSSIBLE I JUST WANT TO SAY I CHRIS ALDANA AM TERRIBLY SORRY FOR ANY TAYLOR SWIFT FAN I MAY HAVE OFFENDED ALONG WITH ALL THE TROUBLE I MAY HAVE CAUSED! I SIMPLY JUST WANTED TO EXPRESS MY OPINION ON DIFFERENT SCENARIOS IN THE FANDOM BUT ACCORDING TO THE FANS THAT ISNT ALLOWED! & I REALIZED INSTEAD OF FIGHTING FOR A BETTER FUTURE IM ACTUALLY WILLING TO OPENLY SPEAK TO TAYLOR SWIFT OR TAYLOR NATION EXPLAINING EVERYTHING I WENT THROUGH IN THE TAYLOR SWIFT FANDOM & HOW IT SHAPED ME TO WHO I AM IN THE FANDOM TODAY! AGAIN I WANT TO SOULY APOLOGIZE TO TAYLOR SWIFT TAYLOR NATION & THE TAYLOR SWIFT FANDOM FOR ANY TROUBLE I MAY HAVE CAUSED & IM OPEN TO ANY QUESTIONS DISCUSSIONS OR CONCERNS YOU MAY HAVE! I HONESTLY HOPE YOU FIND IT IN YOURSELVES TO FORGIVE ME & IF TAYLOR SWIFT OR TAYLOR NATION WANT ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO WITH ME AT ALL & JUST WANT ME TO LEAVE THEN I HAVE NO PROBLEM WITH THAT AT ALL AS WELL! I MAY NOT BE THE PERFECT SWIFTIE FOR YOU TO FEEL WORTHY OF NOTICING BUT WHAT REALLY MATTERS AT THE END OF THE DAY IS THAT I TRIED & THAT I SUPPORTED @taylorswift UNTIL THE VERY END 💗