#well it’s my own fault for exclusively drawing in pen probably
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How (Not) to Meet Your Soulmate
Read on AO3
Relationships: Prinxiety and Logicality
Words: 4,082
Synopsis: It's moving-in day at college, and soulmates Logan and Patton are looking forward to finally meeting in person after years of writing each other messages on their skin. Their friends Roman and Virgil, however, just can't seem to do things the easy way!
** Thanks to: **
@lovelylogans for the Secret Santa wishes that inspired this fic in the first place
@metaphoricalpluto for helping me brainstorm ideas, listening to me rant, and generally being an awesome and supportive bean
@painfullybisexual for going above and beyond in helping me understand how US colleges work
~~*~~*~~*~~*~~
“How”, complains Roman, “Is anyone meant to fit all their outfits into a shoebox like that?” He waves a frustrated arm at the tiny closet the college has provided, then glares at the three cases worth of clothes on his bed. The pile steadfastly fails to reduce.
“I managed it okay!” the room’s other occupant points out cheerfully, smiling over from where he’s pinning photographs of family, friends, and various cute animals haphazardly onto a cork notice board.
“I meant anyone fashionable", Roman amends, flashing his childhood friend and now roommate a grin to show he means no malice.
Patton giggles, reaching to pin another photo, then drops it with a sudden squeal. Grabbing a bright blue pen from his desk, he flings himself joyfully onto his bed, all else temporarily forgotten in favour of the neat indigo text rapidly appearing on his arm.
Roman rolls his eyes. “What time is your date with Logan?” he asks, once Patton has finished replying to his soulmate and flopped back onto his bed with a contented sigh.
“Four o’clock, at the fountain in the main quad”, Patton says, a dreamy look in his eyes. “I can’t believe I’m finally going to meet him face to face!”
“Yes...” Roman busies himself cramming yet more outfits onto the already overstuffed rail in his closet, while studiously avoiding looking at his own, conspicuously bare arm.
“Have you arranged when you’re gonna meet Virgil yet?” The question was inevitable; it’s not Patton’s fault that Roman was hoping not to hear it.
Roman pauses in the act of hanging up a prince costume he's sure he'll find an essential use for at some point. "We're thinking of meeting tomorrow instead", he replies, keeping his tone light. "Virgil's stressed about moving in and navigating the new place, even with Logan around, and we figured after all these years we can survive another day apart."
“You don’t mind waiting?” Patton sits up, frowning, and Roman tries not to squirm under his gaze.
He grimaces. “Well, okay, I'm not thrilled about it, but I want to do what’s best for Virgil. And besides, now we’re on the same campus, there’s a chance fate might intervene.” He presses his hands to his chest, his expression morphing into the smile of an incurable daydreamer. “An encounter of destiny, unplanned, between two souls bound to each other! Doesn’t that sound so much more exciting than something planned?”
“Well, as long as it’s what you guys both want!” Patton smiles, uncapping his pen once more and drawing a heart on his arm. As soon as Roman turns away to continue unpacking, he bites his lip. Beginning a new message to Logan, he thanks the universe, not for the first time, that his soulmate and Roman’s are best friends too.
~~*~~*~~*~~
Logan finished unpacking over an hour ago, taking pleasure in carefully organising his small selection of semi-formal clothes and his more extensive collection of books. Now, he sits relaxing at his desk, reading information about the college in between messages too and from Patton.
Reaching the end of a paragraph, he glances once more at his left arm and notices a new stretch of blue ink dancing its way into being across the skin. He frowns thoughtfully as he reads the words. Hmm…
He looks over to where Virgil is lying back on his bed, surrounded by messy heaps of his unpacked belongings. His eyes are closed and he's listening to music on his headphones, shutting out the chaos and unfamiliarity of his surroundings. Still, Logan knows that exclusion doesn't extend to himself. They've been friends since middle school, and the neurodiversity that brought them together has given them a shared need for space and stability. Virgil finds organising his room a trial, so, on Logan's advice, he's pacing himself. First, he unpacked by dumping everything out of his bags, and now he's taking a break before tackling the more substantial chore of organising it all for the year ahead.
Watching Virgil twitch slightly to the beat of the music, Logan considers. Patton's concern is a reasonable one. Logan was surprised himself by Virgil's reluctance to meet Roman, and while he didn't press the issue at the time, his soulmate has offered a different perspective. Perhaps some subtle investigating is in order after all.
“Virgil”, he begins, to get his roommate’s attention, “Why are you delaying meeting Roman? I realise you find the prospect of meeting new people a stressful one, but surely you cannot consider Roman a stranger after so many years of communication with him?”
Virgil grimaces, opening his eyes and rolling over to face Logan. “Take a wild guess”, he grunts. “I’m putting it off because I know he’s gonna be disappointed. I’ve been able to make him think I’m cool and edgy in writing, but that won’t last two minutes in person when I don’t have all that extra time to think about what to say.”
Logan frowns. “I have never read any reputable reports of people being disappointed when meeting their soulmates. On the contrary, most studies have found a remarkable degree of compatibility between even those with markedly different personalities.”
“Tell that to my anxiety, L.” Virgil sighs, propping himself up onto an elbow. “It’s just a massive step, you know? Feels like too much to handle on the same day as moving in here.”
“Entirely reasonable.” Logan gives what he hopes is a reassuring smile. “It was not my intention to pressure you into meeting sooner. Still, I want you to know I am confident that when you do meet Roman, you will find him happy to accept every side of you, even the ones you struggle to accept yourself.”
“Maybe.” Virgil clearly isn’t convinced, but Logan decides to drop the topic for now. If he’s still refusing to meet Roman tomorrow, they can discuss the issue further then.
He glances at his watch. "I need to leave soon for my planned meeting with Patton. Will you be okay without me?"
“Already?” Virgil groans, flopping onto his back once more.
“We arranged to meet an hour before the new students' assembly to give us ample time for conversation." He hesitates, trying not to sound reluctant as he adds, "If you need to come with me, I am sure Patton will understand."
Virgil shudders. “Hell no, I don’t wanna watch you being sappy and weird. I’ll be okay. Probably turn my music up and kill time by organising some of my stuff.”
Logan nods. “A sensible idea.” Picking up his bag, he checks he has everything he wants to take with him, then takes a deep breath. “I will see you later. Please send me a text if you need me. I may not see it immediately, but I will be sure to check periodically in case.”
Hand on the door handle, he freezes abruptly as an unexpected wave of nervous adrenaline hits him. Distantly, he’s aware of Virgil asking if he’s okay, and he nods despite the way his heart is hammering in his chest. “Text me if you need me”, he repeats, the words a mantra of friendship. Then the handle turns, and he is on his way.
~~*~~*~~*~~
It’s 3:55 when Logan arrives at the fountain, his usual precise punctuality waved in the hope of seeing Patton's. He sits down on the curved stone seat, hands gripping the concrete to still their shaking as he scans the crowds moving around him. The walk across campus has helped to clear the nervous fog from his mind, but the way his heart is pounding, a less scientific thinker would say it was trying to escape his chest.
Wrapped up in these thoughts, he doesn’t notice Patton until the man is six yards away, his long stride rapidly closing that distance. Logan freezes, his heart continuing its thudding beat but somehow doubling the rate, and he has to force himself to breathe. He stands on shaking legs, his eyes fixed irresistibly on the figure now standing before him.
Patton beams down, all tan skin and cotton candy sweater. “Logan?” he asks breathlessly, and Logan’s head nods mechanically as he stares.
Patton's smile somehow widens even further, and he shakes his hands at his sides as if needing to expend some of his boundless excited energy. "I'm so happy to finally meet you! Face to face, I mean! Is it okay if I shake your hand? It sounds silly, but I kinda need to touch you so that I'll know you're really real!"
Something in Logan’s chest relaxes, letting him breathe more easily at last. “I assure you I am no illusion”, he says, smiling as he holds out his left hand.
Patton stares at it, then giggles, and Logan suddenly understands the metaphor of being hit by Cupid’s arrow.
“I forgot we’re opposite-handed!" Patton explains, holding out his own left hand to shake Logan’s eagerly. “I mean, I knew, obviously, but it’s somehow different seeing it in person. Like, now I really know, you know?”
"Indeed, observing for oneself is generally more impactful than hearing information secondhand.” Logan smiles up at him. “You are taller than I expected. For some reason, I assumed you would be approximately my height or shorter, although I now realise that was irrational of me."
Does he sound silly? Perhaps, but he’s unexpectedly overwhelmed by the feelings Patton is eliciting in him. They’ve been having written conversations ever since their soul connection formed, and over time a friendly intimacy has developed between them. Several years have passed since he became aware of the warm sensation thoughts of Patton bring to his chest.
But now, having the man standing before him, seeing his brown eyes sparkling with joy and excitement and the affection in his smile... Hearing his voice and the soft lilt of his accent... Logan has never felt so much all at once before, and it's sending his usually tidy thoughts swirling and scattering like papers in a sudden breeze.
Patton laughs, and the sound shoots another arrow of giddy heat into Logan's chest. "Guess we never thought to tell each other our heights, huh? I'm kinda glad I'm taller than you, though, wanna know why?"
“Why is that?” Logan asks, dazed.
Patton beams at him. "'Cause it means I can wrap you up in a great big hug like I've always wanted to! If you're okay with it, that is?"
Logan nods emphatically, finding his expansive vocabulary buried beneath the sudden lump in his throat. As Patton wraps strong arms around him and rests a warm cheek on his hair, his eyes prickle with what he’s confused to realise are tears. The sensation is so rare, it takes a moment for him to connect them to the glow of happiness spreading through him. With a contented sigh, he raises his own arms to hug Patton back, settling comfortably into his embrace.
~~*~~*~~*~~
Virgil sits on the edge of his bed, frantically bouncing one knee as he wonders if he should set out alone to the assembly. Deep in his spiralling thoughts, he startles hard when his phone buzzes with a text from Logan.
“Salutations,
Would it be possible for you to make your way to the event without me? I realise it may be selfish, but I am keen to spend as much time as possible getting to know Patton better. You are welcome to sit with us if we encounter you when we get there.
- Logan”.
Dammit. It’s what Virgil was expecting, but that doesn’t mean he’s happy about it. He hates both crowds and formal events, and the thought of walking into this combination alone causes bitter dread to pool in the pit of his stomach. Plus, going without Logan means he’s almost guaranteed to end up sitting next to total strangers. He shudders.
Still, he refuses to make Logan worry. Firing back a quick “I’ll be okay”, he puts his earphones in and tries to lose himself in the music as he makes his way across campus to the venue.
Head down, eyes fixed on the ground a foot ahead of him, he tries to forget just how many people are heading the same way he is. As he approaches the hall, he becomes vaguely aware of a loud voice talking nearby. The small part of his mind paying attention concludes it's a telephone conversation, since only one side can be heard.
“But you can’t just abandon me to sit on my own!” the voice wails. “What will people think?! Yes, I’m sure he is handsome and smart and wonderful, but bros before souls, that’s what I always say. Well, okay, maybe I’ve never said it before, but I’m saying it now! Yes, I know, I can hear him. You're right, his accent is cute. I can’t wait to hear my soulmate's- OUCH!!"
A flailing arm thuds into Virgil, who is nearly thrown off balance by the shock of the impact. He looks up, glaring daggers, to find the loudmouth scowling back with equal fury.
“Watch where you’re going, clod!” the overdressed stranger rants.
“Same to you, watch where you’re flinging your arms!”
"I'm having an important conversation-"
“What’s the point in waving your arms around when the person on the phone can’t even-”
They're interrupted by an official-sounding voice ringing out over a tannoy, reminding everyone that the assembly will begin soon and they should hurry inside and find seats.
The disparate parts of the crowd begin to converge, pushing into the hall, and Virgil and the loud stranger are carried along side by side in the flow. They find themselves pushed together to sit on the end of a row of chairs, and although Virgil is still annoyed, he takes some relief at having the aisle seat.
“How did I get stuck next to the emo nightmare?" he hears his neighbour grumble under his breath.
“Karma for being a nightmare yourself”, Virgil mutters, and the stranger at least has the decency to blush.
Their bickering might have continued indefinitely, but at that moment the MC steps up to the microphone to begin their welcome, and an unspoken truce descends.
*****
When at last it's over, Virgil sits back in his chair and sighs wearily. "That was even more boring than I thought it would be", he remarks to no one in particular.
Of course, the stranger beside him responds as though it were directed at him. “I’m surprised you heard any of it with your earphones in the whole time. I could hear your music all the way through!”
Virgil turns and raises an eyebrow. "Yeah? Well, maybe you wouldn't have if you hadn't been leaning over so close to me. You were practically on my lap!"
The stranger huffs, glaring back at him. “It’s not like I had a choice! It was the only way I could see past that mountain of a guy in front of me!”
“Well, sorry I didn’t realise you were so keen for a good view of some guy standing talking.” Virgil scowls. “So you could hear my music, huh? Is that why you kept tapping your fingers on your knee? Don’t think I didn’t notice.”
“I didn’t realise you were paying so much attention to my legs! And besides, I defy anyone not to tap their fingers along to Panic! At The Disco!”
“Wait, you recognised it?” Virgil frowns at the thoroughly preppy-looking guy next to him. “I wasn’t exactly the mainstream stuff. I didn’t take you for an emo.”
“If you must know, my soulmate's an emo, and he introduced me to them. I might not share all his tastes, but as a theatre kid, I always appreciate theatrical flair."
Oh right, soulmates are a thing. Virgil gives a grunt that could mean anything, turning his attention away from the stranger's continued rambling. He watches as more and more individuals and groups make their way to the exits. All the freshmen are meant to be here, which means Roman must be somewhere amongst them. For the first time, he almost regrets never asking for a photograph or more detailed physical description. But he always feared Roman would expect the same from him in return, and then be disappointed or put off by his ever-present hoodie and black eye shadow.
It doesn’t help that the vague description he’s been given of “Tall, with brown hair and blue eyes”, could fit far too many of the students here, including the one tapping a foot and making impatient noises beside him.
With a sigh, Virgil stands up, switching his music back on and turning up the volume as he waits for a gap in the flow of bodies. As soon as one appears, he steps into it, letting himself be absorbed and carried away towards the door. As he moves away, he’s distantly aware of his former seat-mate speaking, but he’s too stressed, too busy trying to blot out the strangers surrounding him to think of looking back.
~~*~~*~~*~~
Roman sighs, flopping dramatically backwards onto his bed. It's been a long day, and he wants to relax, but his mind buzzes restlessly with frustration.
Patton sent a text to say he’ll be getting dinner at the dining hall with Logan, and while he did say Roman was welcome to join them, Roman has no desire to play third wheel, thank you very much. Besides which, he can't shake the petty resentment that his hopes of a destiny-driven encounter with Virgil have apparently been dashed. Instead, he got stuck with some other emo, who, while admittedly very cute, had the cheek, the absolute bare-faced audacity to zone out while Roman was speaking to him and then walk away without even a goodbye!
With a huff, Roman rolls over and glares at the time. It’s 7:15 pm, earlier than his and Virgil’s usual chat time, but he needs to feel connected to his soulmate right now. With a surge of misery, he realises he’s lonely, as well as more envious of Patton and Logan than he’d like to admit.
Fumbling in a pocket, he pulls out the red glitter gel pen he reserves for soul-to-soul talks, and writes “Hey, stormcloud, are you free?” on his left arm.
After a few moments, a spidery dark purple reply writes itself onto his right arm. “Yeah, wanna talk now?”
"Patton's off with Logan, and I need to vent!" He underlines "vent" three times, as emphatic in writing as he would be out loud.
“Is that all I am to you? A listening arm?” It’s followed by their own version of a “:P”, to show that Virgil is joking.
“Of course not, my shadowling! But I’ve had the most boring day, and I'm lonely~".
“Yeah yeah, Logan’s ditched me too, remember? Did you make it to the assembly? I looked for you”.
Roman groans, then does his best to reproduce the sound in writing. “Uggghhh, I did, and I got stuck next to the most annoying guy ever!”
“Hah! Can’t have, because the most annoying guy was sitting next to me. He kept fidgeting and getting in my space through the whole thing”.
Roman grins, standing up and moving to the sink, where he rinses the red ink from his arm to make space for more, Virgil must have the same idea, because a moment later the purple text begins erasing itself too.
“I wish I could’ve sat with you”, he writes, as soon as his arm is dry.
“Same”. There’s a pause, and then, “Kinda regret not meeting you today”.
Roman stares at the words, running his left hand unconsciously through his hair. Destiny might have denied him a chance first meeting, but if Virgil has changed his mind, there’s no reason for them to hold back any longer. Decision made, he uncaps his pen and writes “Want to meet now?” before he can lose his nerve.
The seconds tick by with no response, not a drop of purple ink appearing, and he begins to worry he’s misjudged Virgil’s feelings. Then, at last, three letters appear, small but undeniable:
“Yes”.
“Yes!!” Roman echoes in a yell to the empty room, leaping up and grabbing his jacket from the back of his desk chair. Then he hesitates, sitting back down on the edge of the bed as he realises he doesn’t know where Virgil’s room is. Or even if he’s there, for that matter.
Besides which, while Virgil did accept the offer, his reply wasn’t exactly enthusiastic. Best to make certain he really wants to do this first.
“Are you sure? I don’t mind waiting”, Roman writes, adding a smiley face for good measure.
This time there is only a short pause before the words appear. “Yeah, the whole assembly thing made me wanna see you properly”.
Roman takes a deep breath, trying to still the tremor of excitement rushing through him. “Okay!” he writes back. “Want me to bring anything? I have a popcorn maker and every single Disney movie!”
“Seriously? You brought a freaking popcorn maker to college?”
“We always said we’d have movie nights when we finally met up, eating popcorn and talking all through the films!”
“You are so unbelievably extra”.
“You love it!”
“Yeah, I’m weird like that.”
“So, no popcorn?” Roman asks.
“Are you kidding? Of course bring popcorn!”
Roman grins.
*****
He takes his time making the popcorn, giving Virgil space to adjust to the change in plans. As he does, his thoughts drift to his grumpy seat-mate from earlier, and he remembers wincing as the guy picked at his chipped black nail polish during the endless speeches.
That gives him an idea…
“How about we paint our nails while we talk?” he suggests. “It’s relaxing and we’ll look good!”
“Sure”, appears on his arm. “I’ve only got black and purple though.”
“Fear not, my dark and stormy knight, I have every colour of the rainbow!” Roman grabs his makeup pouch and empties it onto his desk, separating out a selection of his favourites. These he puts back in the pouch, then it goes into his bag with the tub of popcorn.
“I’m ready to head out!” he writes on his arm. “Where’s your room?”
There’s a pause, then the address appears. But before Roman can lower his arm, Virgil adds, “Brace yourself for disappointment”.
“Why?” he writes back, frowning.
“I’m just… probably not gonna be as cool as you expect”.
“Don’t worry, I know you’re not as cool as me!” He replies immediately, then hesitates. Virgil has been vulnerable with him, and he should repay the honesty.
“I’m nervous too”, he admits, “But this is us, remember? We’ve spoken every day since we turned ten and our soul bond formed. We’ve listened to each others’ favourite music, watched each others’ favourite movies, and stayed up all night talking. We’ve shared our hopes, our fears, and our dreams. Even if we weren’t soulmates, you're my best friend, and I love you. Nothing's going to change that.
*****
It's a short walk across campus to Virgil's dorm, and nervous energy quickens Roman's strides. At last, he finds the right number door and gives a firm knock. Slowly, cautiously, it opens to reveal...
“You?!” Roman practically screeches.
“Seriously?!”
“I cannot believe this! Are you actually telling me you’re Virgil?”
“How many ginger-haired emos from Milwaukee do you think there are on campus?!”
“You’re Virgil...” There’s a pause as Roman’s expression visibly cycles from indignant, through dawning realisation, to settle on contrite. “Sorry about, you know...” He waves his arm, and Virgil raises an eyebrow.
“Sorry you clobbered me with your arm?”
“Well, yes… I was talking to Patton and didn’t notice you.”
“Yeah, I got that. Sorry I wasn’t, you know, watching where I was going.” Virgil looks down, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly. “Look, I know I’m annoying. If you’re gonna leave, just go.”
Roman frowns. “Don’t be ridiculous. You might be annoying, but you’re my best friend! I came here to eat popcorn, riff on Disney movies, and hug you, and I’m not leaving until I’ve done all three!”
Virgil looks up, finally managing a lopsided smile. “You sure?”
“Of course! And besides, I bet I can be twice as annoying as you.”
With a snort, Virgil steps back, opening the door further to let Roman in. “Good to know fate made the two most annoying guys in the world soulmates.”
Roman grins. “Soulmates about to have the best evening ever!” he replies.
~~*~~*~~*~~ *~~
@creativity-killed-thekitten @the-prince-and-the-emo @shesavampirequeen @patton-in-name @pearls-of-patton @xxladystarlightxx @suyun-doo @softestlittlepuffball @evilmuffin @milomeepit @musikasworld @holy-anxiety-batman @quoth-the-sparrow @daring-elm @sandersfanders
#prinxiety#logicality#roman sanders#virgil sanders#patton sanders#logan sanders#sanders sides#soulmate au#patchwork fic
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Branjie Fic | Bad Girls Club (1/?)
Title: Bad Girls Club Summary: Los Angeles' new program, the Juvenile Female Rehabilitation Program (JFRP) was created with the purpose of taking at-risk girls in the county and send them to a summer-long program located where a sleepaway camp once stood. There, they will take classes in ethics, behavior, and other courses to help mold these young minds. Brooke Lynn and Vanessa have been sent there for wildly different reasons, but with the same result - a clean permanent record. Being roomed together, the pair might find an unlikely alliance (and maybe more) in each other. Word Count: ~2.5k Relationship: Branjie (Brooke Lynn Hytes/Vanessa Vanjie Mateo) Rating: E (for later chapters)
Read on AO3
------
“Hytes.” The woman’s beady eyes scanned the list over her reading glasses. “Room 208.” She used her pen to point down the hall before walking off to direct the next girl that walked through the door.
Brooke Lynn had only walked about six feet before she heard a room down the hall blasting Rihanna. She looked up when she’d reached the source. 208. Fantastic. Not that she had anything against the singer, but it was eight in the morning and she just was not in the mood to deal with it. Her first instinct was to storm in and shut the music off, but then she remembered where she was.
Most, if not all, of the girls here had some sort of criminal record – she doubted her situation was a common one, being a first-time offender being promised no more than a slap on the wrist once all was said and done. And she knew why – she was rich, white, had a well-connected family… This must have been what Martha Stewart felt like when she went to prison, she mused. Her hand hovered over the doorknob. Should she knock? This was her room too, after all. Besides, whoever was in there probably wouldn’t hear it over the music, so she let herself in, the door shutting behind her.
The room itself was maybe a square foot or two larger than a college dorm, comfortable, but far from roomy and accommodating. It had been re-purposed from the sleepaway camp that preceded it, and it did manage to maintain a woodsy aesthetic. Everything was clean, almost too clean – as if they weren’t supposed to touch anything. Though her roommate’s side already seemed well-lived in, as Brooke noticed when she finally allowed herself to look over towards her.
On the right side of the room, the other inhabitant hadn’t even looked up when she’d walked in. When Brooke’s gaze drifted towards her, she stopped in her tracks. She had wavy, chestnut-brown hair pulled into a loose ponytail, bronze skin that even looked soft to the touch, and as she painted her nails, her tongue was pressed between her lips – soft lips that made Brooke wonder what they’d feel like if—
The music cut off in the middle of ‘Disturbia.’ “Are you my roommate or do you work here?” the girl asked, yanking Brooke from her silent assessment.
“Roommate.” Brooke blushed and moved with her luggage to the other side of the room. “My name’s Brooke Lynn,” she introduced.
“Vanessa. Miss Vanjie if you’re nasty,” she laughed at herself before blowing on her nails and admiring her handiwork. Once done, she sat upright and looked her over. “You lost or something? I think cheer camp’s down the road.” Despite her comments, there wasn’t any malice in her tone.
Brooke looked down, rubbing her arm awkwardly. “No, no. I’ve been… Sentenced to charm school instead of ‘conventional punishment’ just like you, more or less.” She had no idea what Vanessa was actually in for, but the absolute nonchalant attitude she had made it clear that she wasn’t the same anxious, uncertain, ‘just slipped up’ type.
Vanessa snorted in laughter. “For what? Some white people shit like…” She was drawing a blank. “Tax evasion?”
Brooke covered her mouth as she giggled. “No, no, nothing like that.” She looked down, fiddling with her hair. “A guy kept hitting on my friend at work. When she finally outright rejected him, he got her fired. So… I slashed his tires.” She didn’t regret what she had done, but everyone from her parents to teachers acted like she had lost her mind whenever she told the story.
But not Vanessa. No, she was smiling at her, nodding her head in approval. “Shit, that’s pretty badass for someone that looks like Elle Woods,” she mused.
“Hey, Elle Woods is badass!” Brooke retorted. “But…thanks, I think. What about you – what sort of wild felony did you commit that makes you such an authority?”
Vanessa rolled her eyes and lay back down. “I got busted with a quarter ounce and a fake.” Before Brooke could ask, she clarified, “Weed and a fake ID. But I’m a ‘repeat offender’ and ‘general nuisance’,” she huffed, irritated. It wasn’t her fault – it was just how she liked to have fun. She wasn’t hurting anyone.
“And now we’re here. The great equalizer of the system,” Brooke mused as she started to unpack.
“Yo, don’t pretend for a second like the system treats us equal just ‘cause we roommates, got it? You can’t pretend they gonna look at us and treat us the same. We can sit and kiki and braid each other’s hair or whatever, but you know damn well we going home to two real different lives.” Vanessa had rolled onto her side as she spoke, bearing a piercing glare that contrasted her relaxed position.
Brooke stared at the ground and cleared her throat. “You’re absolutely right, and I’m sorry.” So much for making a good first impression she thought, and silently went back to moving her clothes into their respective drawers.
After a deep, reluctant sigh, Vanessa got up and sat next to Brooke instead. “It’s okay. I don’t want us to get off on a bad start. There’s gonna be a lot of crazy bitches in this program, might be nice to have someone in your corner, you know?”
Still a bit red in the face, Brooke Lynn faced her, tucking a few blonde strands behind her ear. “I couldn’t agree more.” A smile tugged at the corners of her lips as she felt a weight lift off of her chest. “Allies?” She extended her hand out.
Vanessa chuckled and shook her hand. “Sure, allies.” She tilted her head, studying Brooke’s hand for a moment. “You got short nails,” she remarked. “Is that a personal preference or—”
“Yes, I’m a lesbian, Vanessa,” Brooke laughed softly.
“Duly noted.”
------
It was the first night at the JFRP, and all two hundred girls had been funneled into the mess hall for dinner. This room was the most obvious remainder of the site’s days as a sleepaway camp, leaving it just endearing enough to make them forget where they were, if only for a meal. Brooke Lynn had just taken her plate of uniformly unappetizing dinner and searched aimlessly for a seat. There didn’t seem to be a spot for her to sit in.
Vanessa noticed this and, after going back and forth for a moment, took pity on her. “Yo, roomie, over here!” The smile and relief on the blonde’s face was just enough to keep her from regretting the decision.
The other girls, her friend, A’keria and two other girls – Yvie and Scarlet – if she remembered correctly, at the table had hardly acknowledged Brooke directly, rather exclusively to each other through unsubtle whispering – mostly speculation that Vanessa was only tolerating Brooke’s presence because ‘she looked like a Barbie doll’ and ‘hey, if she’s flexible enough…’
“Would all of y’all shut the fuck up? Crazy asses.” Vanessa had whirled around to snap at them, glaring pointedly.
Yvie’s brow rose and a smirk hit her lips. “Thou doth protest too much,” she chided.
“Don’t even care enough to ask what you mean.” She rolled her eyes.
“What’s going on?” Brooke asked, looking up from her tray and towards the other four girls, having been fading in and out of paying attention.
Vanessa turned, angling herself between Brooke and the other girls to intercept. “Nothing, they just being stupid, don’t pay them bitches no mind,” she assured, spending the rest of the meal making sure the two conversations didn’t overlap.
Luck was with her, as they got through dinner without Brooke Lynn catching on to the adjacent gossip. But whatever luck she had immediately dissipated when they returned to their room. Vanessa’s bed was stripped bare and there was a note taped to the frame. Apparently, there had been reports of mold on the beds and each of them were inspected during dinner. While Brooke hadn’t been affected, she was stuck without a bed for the night. “This is bullshit,” she muttered. “What the fuck am I supposed to do now?”
“You can share with me,” Brooke offered with a shrug and a small smile. “I know it’s a little tight, but I don’t mind if you don’t.” In fact, she reallydidn’t mind, but she swore it was coming from a kind place and not a sexual one.
And Vanessa wasn’t sure how to make heads or tails of it either – but she sure as hell wasn’t about to sleep on the floor. “You sure? ‘Cause that does sound like the best option here,” she admitted, sitting down on the unaffected bed.
“Of course, it’s the least I could do.” Brooke got up and grabbed her toothbrush and pajamas. “I’ll be right back,” she said and went down the hall to the bathroom.
It had only taken Vanessa a minute to get changed, leaving her alone on Brooke’s bed, which in and of itself didn’t mean anything, but the temptation to snoop was starting to grow. A little peek couldn’t hurt, right? All she took was a quick look through the top drawer – just enough for her to be impressed by the fact that Brooke appeared to own half of a Victoria’s Secret catalog. She had thought she’d spotted something else as well, but she heard footsteps down the hall and slammed the drawer shut, avoiding getting caught by the skin of her teeth.
Brooke got under the covers after she set her belongings down. “I’m gonna turn in now, just make yourself comfortable.” She rolled over and closed her eyes.
------
Despite having fallen asleep facing the wall, Brooke had awoken to find herself spooning Vanessa from behind, her face buried into her thick mane that smelled faintly of vanilla and cinnamon. Her smaller body felt so warm and soft against her own and god, if she could only just lay there a little longer…
The default iPhone alarm had just become Brooke’s least favorite sound in the world. Having to untangle herself from a barely awake Vanessa caused her damn near real pain. “Class is in an hour,” she mumbled to her bed companion as she pushed herself to a sitting position and rubbed her eyes.
Vanessa rolled onto her stomach and groaned into the pillow. “Shouldn’t have to wake up at eight in the fucking morning in the summer,” she muttered.
“This is still a punishment,” Brooke reminded her as she carefully navigated around her to get out of bed and dress for the day.
Vanessa rolled her eyes as she pulled herself together. “This is still a punishment,” she mocked under her breath as she ran a brush through her hair. She threw her bag over her shoulder and shoved her hands into her pockets before they walked – not together, but in tandem – to the main building.
In front of the building were a few tables, milk crates full of paper bags on each of them. ‘Breakfast’ was written in marker and taped to the front of each crate and each girl took a bag as they went inside.
There were about ten minutes of just chatting while eating their single-serve packages of cereal and dubiously ripe oranges. The teacher had entered in the midst of breakfast, and even when everyone had settled down, there was an air of confusion around her presence.
Considering the circumstances, everyone had expected someone gruff and serious – maybe a cop or a warden or something. Instead, they had a tall, cheerful woman that stepped right out of a Disney cartoon.
“Good morning, ladies. My name is Ms. West and I’ll be your behavioral modification instructor for the duration of this program,” she greeted and wrote her name on the board. “I will say, I am surprised to see some familiar faces here, but no matter, you’re all equal in my eyes.”
Brooke sunk into her seat, wishing now more than ever that she was anywhere but in this classroom. She dropped her gaze to the desk, pointedly avoiding eye contact with the teacher.
Vanessa, sitting a row over, waved her hand to get Brooke’s attention and mouthed ‘what’s wrong?’
‘Nothing,’ Brooke mouthed, shaking her head and then huddling herself over the syllabus when it made its way down the line to her.
The rest of the introductory class had gone in one ear and out the other. Brooke Lynn’s mind felt cloudy, as if it’d slipped into a sea of fog that filled up her head and only threatened to escape through the mist in her eyes. Her cheeks burned red, fueled by the rapid beating of her heart. This was the last thing she had wanted, the one thing she didn’t have any sort of plan for.
“I’m surprised to see you here, Brooke Lynn,” Nina said when she started towards the exit. “This isn’t your scene at all, what happened?”
“I messed up.” She shrugged and put her hands on her hips. “I did something I wasn’t supposed to, and now I’m paying the price.” She sighed and looked down. “Please don’t let this get out back home, I’ve been keeping it a secret.”
Nina nodded. “I’ve never broken a promise to you before,” she assured, then tilted her head. “You should get going, your friend’s waiting for you.” She used her head to gesture back towards the rows of desks.
Brooke’s brows knit forward before she turned around and saw Vanessa lingering, sitting up on one of the desks and swinging her legs. “Oh, yeah… Come on, Vanjie. We should go.” She pressed her lips into a fine line and briskly walked out of the class, inadvertently making it difficult for the shorter girl to catch up.
“Okay, now will you tell me what the fuck is going on?” Vanessa asked, out of breath.
“Nina – Ms. West – is a teacher at the school I go to. And it’s…well, it’s the type of school you probably think I go to.” She chuckled dryly. “She’s like a mentor to me, I really respect her. I feel like I’m letting her down by being here, and gossip spreads so fast…”
“But you aren’t here ‘cause of some stupid shit. You’re here for standing up for your friend. I bet that’d get you a lot of street cred in whatever fancy-ass private school you go to,” Vanessa offered with a soft smile.
Brooke sighed and shook her head. “It doesn’t work like that. Where I’m from, ‘street cred’ is a mark against you. You have to be as close to the norm as possible. Coming out caused enough drama, I don’t need this on me too,” she explained. “So, I just have to be as boring as possible.”
Vanessa let out a soft laugh. “I don’t care what you do back home, but there’s no way I’m letting you be lame here.”
“Is that a threat or a promise?”
“Guess you’ll just have to wait and see, babe.”
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Bad Girls Club (Branjie) Chapter 1 - Joley (redvanjie)
A/N: (abridged summary) Brooke Lynn and Vanessa are sent to the same summer program (juvenile female rehabilitation program/jfrp) in exchange for having their permanent records expunged. While there for very different reasons, they just might find an alliance (and maybe more) with each other [Read on AO3]
“Hytes.” The woman’s beady eyes scanned the list over her reading glasses. “Room 208.” She used her pen to point down the hall before walking off to direct the next girl that walked through the door.
Brooke Lynn had only walked about six feet before she heard a room down the hall blasting Rihanna. She looked up when she’d reached the source. 208. Fantastic. Not that she had anything against the singer, but it was eight in the morning and she just was not in the mood to deal with it. Her first instinct was to storm in and shut the music off, but then she remembered where she was.
Most, if not all, of the girls here had some sort of criminal record – she doubted her situation was a common one, being a first-time offender being promised no more than a slap on the wrist once all was said and done. And she knew why – she was rich, white, had a well-connected family… This must have been what Martha Stewart felt like when she went to prison, she mused. Her hand hovered over the doorknob. Should she knock? This was her room too, after all. Besides, whoever was in there probably wouldn’t hear it over the music, so she let herself in, the door shutting behind her.
The room itself was maybe a square foot or two larger than a college dorm, comfortable, but far from roomy and accommodating. It had been re-purposed from the sleepaway camp that preceded it, and it did manage to maintain a woodsy aesthetic. Everything was clean, almost too clean – as if they weren’t supposed to touch anything. Though her roommate’s side already seemed well-lived in, as Brooke noticed when she finally allowed herself to look over towards her.
On the right side of the room, the other inhabitant hadn’t even looked up when she’d walked in. When Brooke’s gaze drifted towards her, she stopped in her tracks. She had wavy, chestnut-brown hair pulled into a loose ponytail, bronze skin that even looked soft to the touch, and as she painted her nails, her tongue was pressed between her lips – soft lips that made Brooke wonder what they’d feel like if—
The music cut off in the middle of ‘Disturbia.’ “Are you my roommate or do you work here?” the girl asked, yanking Brooke from her silent assessment.
“Roommate.” Brooke blushed and moved with her luggage to the other side of the room. “My name’s Brooke Lynn,” she introduced.
“Vanessa. Miss Vanjie if you’re nasty,” she laughed at herself before blowing on her nails and admiring her handiwork. Once done, she sat upright and looked her over. “You lost or something? I think cheer camp’s down the road.” Despite her comments, there wasn’t any malice in her tone.
Brooke looked down, rubbing her arm awkwardly. “No, no. I’ve been… Sentenced to charm school instead of ‘conventional punishment’ just like you, more or less.” She had no idea what Vanessa was actually in for, but the absolute nonchalant attitude she had made it clear that she wasn’t the same anxious, uncertain, ‘just slipped up’ type.
Vanessa snorted in laughter. “For what? Some white people shit like…” She was drawing a blank. “Tax evasion?”
Brooke covered her mouth as she giggled. “No, no, nothing like that.” She looked down, fiddling with her hair. “A guy kept hitting on my friend at work. When she finally outright rejected him, he got her fired. So… I slashed his tires.” She didn’t regret what she had done, but everyone from her parents to teachers acted like she had lost her mind whenever she told the story.
But not Vanessa. No, she was smiling at her, nodding her head in approval. “Shit, that’s pretty badass for someone that looks like Elle Woods,” she mused.
“Hey, Elle Woods is badass!” Brooke retorted. “But…thanks, I think. What about you – what sort of wild felony did you commit that makes you such an authority?”
Vanessa rolled her eyes and lay back down. “I got busted with a quarter ounce and a fake.” Before Brooke could ask, she clarified, “Weed and a fake ID. But I’m a ‘repeat offender’ and ‘general nuisance’,” she huffed, irritated. It wasn’t her fault – it was just how she liked to have fun. She wasn’t hurting anyone.
“And now we’re here. The great equalizer of the system,” Brooke mused as she started to unpack.
“Yo, don’t pretend for a second like the system treats us equal just ‘cause we roommates, got it? You can’t pretend they gonna look at us and treat us the same. We can sit and kiki and braid each other’s hair or whatever, but you know damn well we going home to two real different lives.” Vanessa had rolled onto her side as she spoke, bearing a piercing glare that contrasted her relaxed position.
Brooke stared at the ground and cleared her throat. “You’re absolutely right, and I’m sorry.” So much for making a good first impression she thought, and silently went back to moving her clothes into their respective drawers.
After a deep, reluctant sigh, Vanessa got up and sat next to Brooke instead. “It’s okay. I don’t want us to get off on a bad start. There’s gonna be a lot of crazy bitches in this program, might be nice to have someone in your corner, you know?”
Still a bit red in the face, Brooke Lynn faced her, tucking a few blonde strands behind her ear. “I couldn’t agree more.” A smile tugged at the corners of her lips as she felt a weight lift off of her chest. “Allies?” She extended her hand out.
Vanessa chuckled and shook her hand. “Sure, allies.” She tilted her head, studying Brooke’s hand for a moment. “You got short nails,” she remarked. “Is that a personal preference or—”
“Yes, I’m a lesbian, Vanessa,” Brooke laughed softly.
“Duly noted.”
——
It was the first night at the JFRP, and all two hundred girls had been funneled into the mess hall for dinner. This room was the most obvious remainder of the site’s days as a sleepaway camp, leaving it just endearing enough to make them forget where they were, if only for a meal. Brooke Lynn had just taken her plate of uniformly unappetizing dinner and searched aimlessly for a seat. There didn’t seem to be a spot for her to sit in.
Vanessa noticed this and, after going back and forth for a moment, took pity on her. “Yo, roomie, over here!” The smile and relief on the blonde’s face was just enough to keep her from regretting the decision.
The other girls, her friend, A’keria and two other girls – Yvie and Scarlet – if she remembered correctly, at the table had hardly acknowledged Brooke directly, rather exclusively to each other through unsubtle whispering – mostly speculation that Vanessa was only tolerating Brooke’s presence because ‘she looked like a Barbie doll’ and ‘hey, if she’s flexible enough…’
“Would all of y’all shut the fuck up? Crazy asses.” Vanessa had whirled around to snap at them, glaring pointedly.
Yvie’s brow rose and a smirk hit her lips. “Thou doth protest too much,” she chided.
“Don’t even care enough to ask what you mean.” She rolled her eyes.
“What’s going on?” Brooke asked, looking up from her tray and towards the other four girls, having been fading in and out of paying attention.
Vanessa turned, angling herself between Brooke and the other girls to intercept. “Nothing, they just being stupid, don’t pay them bitches no mind,” she assured, spending the rest of the meal making sure the two conversations didn’t overlap.
Luck was with her, as they got through dinner without Brooke Lynn catching on to the adjacent gossip. But whatever luck she had immediately dissipated when they returned to their room. Vanessa’s bed was stripped bare and there was a note taped to the frame. Apparently, there had been reports of mold on the beds and each of them were inspected during dinner. While Brooke hadn’t been affected, she was stuck without a bed for the night. “This is bullshit,” she muttered. “What the fuck am I supposed to do now?”
“You can share with me,” Brooke offered with a shrug and a small smile. “I know it’s a little tight, but I don’t mind if you don’t.” In fact, she reallydidn’t mind, but she swore it was coming from a kind place and not a sexual one.
And Vanessa wasn’t sure how to make heads or tails of it either – but she sure as hell wasn’t about to sleep on the floor. “You sure? ‘Cause that does sound like the best option here,” she admitted, sitting down on the unaffected bed.
“Of course, it’s the least I could do.” Brooke got up and grabbed her toothbrush and pajamas. “I’ll be right back,” she said and went down the hall to the bathroom.
It had only taken Vanessa a minute to get changed, leaving her alone on Brooke’s bed, which in and of itself didn’t mean anything, but the temptation to snoop was starting to grow. A little peek couldn’t hurt, right? All she took was a quick look through the top drawer – just enough for her to be impressed by the fact that Brooke appeared to own half of a Victoria’s Secret catalog. She had thought she’d spotted something else as well, but she heard footsteps down the hall and slammed the drawer shut, avoiding getting caught by the skin of her teeth.
Brooke got under the covers after she set her belongings down. “I’m gonna turn in now, just make yourself comfortable.” She rolled over and closed her eyes.
——
Despite having fallen asleep facing the wall, Brooke had awoken to find herself spooning Vanessa from behind, her face buried into her thick mane that smelled faintly of vanilla and cinnamon. Her smaller body felt so warm and soft against her own and god, if she could only just lay there a little longer…
The default iPhone alarm had just become Brooke’s least favorite sound in the world. Having to untangle herself from a barely awake Vanessa caused her damn near real pain. “Class is in an hour,” she mumbled to her bed companion as she pushed herself to a sitting position and rubbed her eyes.
Vanessa rolled onto her stomach and groaned into the pillow. “Shouldn’t have to wake up at eight in the fucking morning in the summer,” she muttered.
“This is still a punishment,” Brooke reminded her as she carefully navigated around her to get out of bed and dress for the day.
Vanessa rolled her eyes as she pulled herself together. “This is still a punishment,” she mocked under her breath as she ran a brush through her hair. She threw her bag over her shoulder and shoved her hands into her pockets before they walked – not together, but in tandem – to the main building.
In front of the building were a few tables, milk crates full of paper bags on each of them. ‘Breakfast’ was written in marker and taped to the front of each crate and each girl took a bag as they went inside.
There were about ten minutes of just chatting while eating their single-serve packages of cereal and dubiously ripe oranges. The teacher had entered in the midst of breakfast, and even when everyone had settled down, there was an air of confusion around her presence.
Considering the circumstances, everyone had expected someone gruff and serious – maybe a cop or a warden or something. Instead, they had a tall, cheerful woman that stepped right out of a Disney cartoon.
“Good morning, ladies. My name is Ms. West and I’ll be your behavioral modification instructor for the duration of this program,” she greeted and wrote her name on the board. “I will say, I am surprised to see some familiar faces here, but no matter, you’re all equal in my eyes.”
Brooke sunk into her seat, wishing now more than ever that she was anywhere but in this classroom. She dropped her gaze to the desk, pointedly avoiding eye contact with the teacher.
Vanessa, sitting a row over, waved her hand to get Brooke’s attention and mouthed ‘what’s wrong?’
‘Nothing,’ Brooke mouthed, shaking her head and then huddling herself over the syllabus when it made its way down the line to her.
The rest of the introductory class had gone in one ear and out the other. Brooke Lynn’s mind felt cloudy, as if it’d slipped into a sea of fog that filled up her head and only threatened to escape through the mist in her eyes. Her cheeks burned red, fueled by the rapid beating of her heart. This was the last thing she had wanted, the one thing she didn’t have any sort of plan for.
“I’m surprised to see you here, Brooke Lynn,” Nina said when she started towards the exit. “This isn’t your scene at all, what happened?”
“I messed up.” She shrugged and put her hands on her hips. “I did something I wasn’t supposed to, and now I’m paying the price.” She sighed and looked down. “Please don’t let this get out back home, I’ve been keeping it a secret.”
Nina nodded. “I’ve never broken a promise to you before,” she assured, then tilted her head. “You should get going, your friend’s waiting for you.” She used her head to gesture back towards the rows of desks.
Brooke’s brows knit forward before she turned around and saw Vanessa lingering, sitting up on one of the desks and swinging her legs. “Oh, yeah… Come on, Vanjie. We should go.” She pressed her lips into a fine line and briskly walked out of the class, inadvertently making it difficult for the shorter girl to catch up.
“Okay, now will you tell me what the fuck is going on?” Vanessa asked, out of breath.
“Nina – Ms. West – is a teacher at the school I go to. And it’s…well, it’s the type of school you probably think I go to.” She chuckled dryly. “She’s like a mentor to me, I really respect her. I feel like I’m letting her down by being here, and gossip spreads so fast…”
“But you aren’t here ‘cause of some stupid shit. You’re here for standing up for your friend. I bet that’d get you a lot of street cred in whatever fancy-ass private school you go to,” Vanessa offered with a soft smile.
Brooke sighed and shook her head. “It doesn’t work like that. Where I’m from, ‘street cred’ is a mark against you. You have to be as close to the norm as possible. Coming out caused enough drama, I don’t need this on me too,” she explained. “So, I just have to be as boring as possible.”
Vanessa let out a soft laugh. “I don’t care what you do back home, but there’s no way I’m letting you be lame here.”
“Is that a threat or a promise?”
“Guess you’ll just have to wait and see, babe.”
#rpdr fanfiction#brooke lynn hytes#vanessa vanjie mateo#branjie#lesbian au#teen au#bad girls club#joley#submission
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Roses in Your Eyes
Oh look, a not-Inktober thing! So after my first dive into The Realm of Gouache, I really wanted to play with the medium a little more and try doing some different things with it. More accurately, I wanted to try using the gouache more opaquely, since last time I took a more transparent/watercolor approach. Full disclosure, I actually had the sketch for this done before the gouache set even arrived to me. My original plan was to do the rose part of the "glasses" in the watercolor style from my In Bloom Le Plumes piece, maybe the leaves too, and then do the hair and possibly the skin in the more opaque gouache style. That was the plan so that I could try to get the most out of both sides to what gouache can do. But after I got the gouache and swatched it out, I wanted to try something a little more experimental before I jumped into this drawing so that I'd have a better handle on what I was actually working with. So that's where the first gouache painting came in. So it was after that when I made the decision to commit a little more closely to using gouache in it's more opaque form. The concept for the drawing is something of a play on the phrase "looking through rose-colored glasses," (or whatever the full version of that phrase is, you know what I mean). The original expression, as I'm sure we all know, means seeing something as being better than it actually is, usually because of personal bias. This idea takes it to a bit of an extreme; the glasses aren't just tinted in a rose color, they're straight-up roses. Instead of just viewing something as better than it actually is, the person is willfully ignoring or otherwise blinded to seeing things as they really are entirely. And possibly hurting themselves in the process, if the roses have thorns. (I didn't draw any but they could be there, unseen.) A couple of other notes on the drawing design before I move on: I went with buns in the hair since I usually draw loose/down hair and wanted to mix it up a bit, and to "close off" the drawing I added the leaves at the base of her neck, which also kind of double as a shirt-collar in terms of appearance, which I thought was neat. The leaves and the bit of vine across the nose, as may be obvious, are supposed to represent the frame and bridge of glasses. I transferred the lines from the sketch to piece of Strathmore mixed media paper since I didn't think I'd be using enough water or watercolor techniques to warrant breaking out some 100% cotton paper, but I wanted something thick enough to handle paint, and I thought the smooth-ish texture would suit the gouache based on what experimenting I'd already done. The roses for the eyes had no lines, and admittedly I probably could've gotten away with even fewer lines than the ones I did transfer since the gouache is opaque. I actually had a fair number of hairlines drawn in that got totally covered up since that was way easier than trying to carefully work around them. Anyway. For all the gouache parts, I started with a darker base color, since it's usually recommended that you work from dark to light in gouache, and then I'd go back in with 2-3 lighter colors on top to add shading/depth. The main issues I ran into were when the gouache color wasn't totally opaque, such as the rose base color (which is actually called "Rose," believe it or not) which gives me mixed feelings because on the one hand, it can look kind of interesting in giving you less structured, more unpredictable shading based on how you layer it, but also...well, it's not as opaque, so you have work with it slightly differently compared to the more opaque colors. The other issue was that I really struggled to have enough paint on my brush, particularly when doing tiny details, to get the full opacity and smooth color that I wanted, without leaving a glop of paint where it didn't need to be. Especially in areas like the hair that had a lot of fine tapering lines. I'm not sure how much of the problem is me and how my is or isn't my brushes or what, but this is something I occasionally have issues within acrylic painting too, but it felt way more prevalent here. I did manage to fix some areas that got away from me by layering darker colors back on top of the lighter ones, but then you also have areas like one of the loose hair strands around her chin that got away from me and I had to make noticeably longer than it originally was in order to fix it. (You can probably guess which one it was without me having to point it out for you.) I also had an "issue" in that it was seemingly very easy to mix up way too much of custom color, but that's more of a me problem than a problem with the paint. (And admittedly the above aren't necessarily paint-specific problems either.) Speaking of which, I'm still not sure if my "Titanium White" and "White" got mixed up or not, but since I suspect they did, I used the one I felt like looks more like the mixing white to do so. (Although admittedly I probably could've tried some mixing tests with both to see if I noticed a difference there whatever, perhaps some other time.) And I specifically avoided using black, since I thought it would be too harsh in mixes. For the hair, I just used one of the pre-mixed browns for my darkest and then used lighter colors and made my own lighter mixes to go over it. For the leaves, I actually mixed some of the Prussian Blue into one of the greens to make it darker. I think I may have benefitted from going a little lighter on how much of the blue went in, though. The roses were actually one of the more fun parts since they didn't have to be so precise or specific to make the look work. I started with a base of the Rose/hot pink color, mixed a lighter pink to make sections that probably should've been a little less light in color and slightly larger in shape, and then a slightly lighter pink than should have been lighter to layer on top of the already lighter pink parts. Partly because of some the issues I mentioned earlier and partly because I was just kinda going for whatever with only a minimal plan, I did have to go back and forth with the lights and darks in some areas on these, and I still don't think they look quite alike enough, even though I never intended to make them perfectly symmetrical. I also decided to not totally abandon gouache's watercolor properties with the background, since at this point I was thinking I didn't want to leave it plain white, but I also didn't want to do anything too complicated or intense that might take away from the rest of the art and the concept behind it. So I watered down some of the pink I used for the roses' base color and just kinda went over the background to my heart's content until I was happy with what the textures were doing since I knew it was unrealistic to expect to be able to get the background totally smooth trying to work around the rest of the drawing. Now, originally I was planning on painting in the skin with the gouache, however, I made the grave mistake of not thinking about it until after I'd pretty much finished with all the other painted parts, and I really did not feel like trying to paint around everything. And, honestly, I really did like the contrast of the white skin against the other colors. I did acknowledge that I could have mixed a gray from the gouache and shaded the white skin with that, but it felt like too much of a risk and still like too much of a hassle, so I conceited that I could bring other mediums into this since I'd already done my gouache-exclusive test piece. I grabbed a couple of very, very light gray Copic markers and added some very careful, very subtle shading to the skin. And you guys haven't seen the first time I used this mixed-media paper just yet (it's coming down the pipeline, I promise!), but for the second time I'm kind of in love with how it handles alcohol markers and I really need to try a more marker-heavy illustration on it sometime. After all that though, it was still missing a couple of things. I ended up breaking out my white uni-ball Signo gel pen to line around the girl just so she really would pop off the background, opting for it instead of the white gouache because, again, that seemed like too much of a chore to try and do. And my white Sakura gelly roll tends to be a little more transparent compared to the Signo, and I really wanted the stronger, stark white look. Then after some thinking, I added the rose lines in the background using a pink and a green Sakura gelly rolls and the stencil I've toyed with using on other projects before. And overall it, it has its faults (especially if you look at it too closely), but I really like how the whole thing turned out. It has almost a surreal vibe to it that I think drives home the initial concept really nicely, and just, in general, it's very sweet colors but has a more eerie feel to it. (At least when I look at it, anyway.) It also very vaguely gives me Luna-Lovegood vibes, so of course, I like it for that alone. I'm not sure what I'm going to make with the gouache next, as so far it seems its planning requires a slightly different thought process than I'm used to, but I have some ideas and all this has succeeded in doing is making me want to use the gouache more. This definitely isn't the last we'll be seeing of it, that's for sure! ____ Artwork © me, MysticSparkleWings ____ Where to find me & my artwork: My Website | Commission Info + Prices | Ko-Fi | dA Print Shop | RedBubble | Twitter | Tumblr | Instagram
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Out of Nowhere Girl - Talos/Keller/OC (Captain Marvel)
Set In Canon MCU Captain Marvel / Guardian’s of the Galaxy Universe with a few out-of-canon ‘twists’...
Author’s Note: Posting this a week after I see Captain Marvel (AS FOLLOWS CANON!) but still tagging with spoilers.
Oh my god. I was having an existential crisis after the movie and the fic that I posted that is not canon (Science & Faith. If you want to read you can click the thing) That I wrote this between acts at the C2C country music festival on 9th March... That makes this the quickest write and edit I have EVER done. It’s probably quite telling... (It’s 10/3/19 @ 8:26 PM GMT.) She is with Keller, Talos just simed him. I’m making that clear right now! It’ll make sense when you read! This is an alternate version to ‘Science & Faith’ - so that characters there are the same. This one just follows actual movie canon.
Don’t worry it’s not the same story. It has a few similar elements... It will likely go back and forth between the two time periods. Please someone get what I did with his full name... 😂😭
NOT reader insert. Disclaimer: I own nothing but my OC... I am slightly bending canon on Supernova; but I liked the concept. Maybe I've set it so there's more than one? Like a special forces part of the Nova Corp? (Tbh still figuring this out) So you can have it coming from another Saal... sorry not sorry Expositional conversation-narrative heavy... Sorry!
Simmed? Simed? Sim-ed? Which is it!?
Premise: When Keller gets sim-ed by Talos as a result of the Kree-Skrull war the aftermath is of no great consequence to his partner... However, when exploring on behalf of the Nova Corps Keller’s distress signature coming from a planet half way across the galaxy leads her to investigate...
Word Count: 4384
Warnings: Spoilers! Murder (I guess) Actually this might assume you know about her from Science & Faith...
My little out, out of nowhere girl Where you been all my life? Where you been trying to hide? It's like you’ve come Come from another world Fell right out of the sky And landed right here tonight...
Keller had had a day. He’s had days before, as a S.H.I.E.L.D agent and sometime-Scientist he expected for days to be a part of his life. But this had been something else entirely. When he opened the door to his apartment, he was at least glad to be greeted by an essence of normality. Well, as normal as it could get he supposed…
Maliyah was pouring over drawing after drawing and ship schematics. She still couldn’t get something on that ship of hers to work right. Or, maybe she knew she was just stalling for time… She looked up with a smile; “I can already tell you have a lot to tell me…” “Yeah…” He sighed, throwing his keys on the counter and allowing a pause. “It’s where to start…” He looked across to her, at the way her skin sparkled just at his presence… She’d crash landed to Earth nearly two years previously. Through studying her they had built a friendship – and now it was a lot more than that. The blue lights across her skin; because, all of his were blue or white, or purple… used to only light up when he touched her. Or, when he was feeling something at the extreme end of the spectrum. They turned red every time he got hurt, and that hurt her too… So he’d tried to make his life easier. Tried. Now the lights appeared just because he was in proximity… She said that showed they had a strong bond. Keller was only human, so he felt proud of that. He hadn’t ever expected to see anything else otherworldly – until today happened. “Maliyah… You know a lot about the other species out there… right?” She put her pen down and turned her full attention on him; “Yes. Enough. Why?” “Because you were the only other race I thought I’d ever see. But clearly, I was wrong. Because-” He faltered, squinted in remembering and then tried again “…Tell me about shapeshifters?” “Narrow that down. It isn’t an exclusive trait…” She tilted her head “…But now I’m worried.” “Okay, uh… Green… pointed ears… Like… linear markings or patterns…or…” “Skrulls!?” She was takenaback “Skrulls on Earth!?” Then she slammed her hands on the table, more in interest that anger; “WAIT! Did you get SIMED by a Skrull!?!??!” Clearly he had no idea what that meant by the look on his face, but she couldn’t hide her laugh; “…Wait. Skrulls are on Earth? Okay, I’ll roll with it… Did a Skrull shapeshift into YOU.” “…Yes.” She laughed again “Oh God!” Then she attempted to stop herself “Oh! Baby, that’s terrible!” “Doesn’t sound like you mean it.” She cleared her throat, “Whilst it’s funny it’s not exactly good news…” She rested her hands on her thighs and chewed her lip “…What did you think about..?” “Huh?” “Your last thoughts. Before they simed you.” “Probably something like: Oh GOD I hope I don’t die?!” “You didn’t think about me, at all?” He hesitated, it probably wasn’t the best idea to confess to his other half he hadn’t thought about her whilst waiting on the fate of his own life… “…Uh…No…?” “Good.” “Good?!” She was clearly as full of surprises. As any ‘alien’ should be, he guessed. “Yes. I’m an Auron, my race and my planet are dying… Sightings of us are rare even in our part of the galaxy… As an adult female I am worth a hell of a lot to my home planet – And a lot of my abilities will be worth something to a race like to Skrulls.” “…So you’re telling me that not talking about you – like you asked - and therefore obviously not consciously thinking of you is good?” She nodded; “I wonder if the Kree war has come all the way out here?” She almost laughed again “That’s no good for me either… Considering my affinity with Xandar… You’ve done very well if they don’t know a THING.” “…Have you seen me today!?” Her sentence sparked panic in him. “Right now and when you left. I haven’t been out of here even once. I’ve been working this algorithm…” she shook her head “You haven’t come back, I haven’t called you… Zip. I promise.” “…Okay…” “Don’t worry about me… I’m more worried about you… Getting Simed is not the experience you want to have… are you okay?” “Seeing someone change into me… That’s bad, getting tied up and left in a Blockbuster though… Ehhhhh….!” She shook her head “…You really went through it then, huh?” She beckoned him over, and he was all too glad to walk into her arms… She brushed some stray hairs out of his face, her touch gentle and welcoming… A different set of colours formed on her skin – these lights pale and milky… pastels… enveloping him in her arms the effect was instantly calming… “I’m sorry…” “…You don’t need to be sorry…” “I told you, nothing about another race coming to Earth is good…” He almost laughed; “That makes you an anomaly then… You must be the one good thing.” ** Nick Fury almost jumped at the next knock at his door. This time it was Keller that opened it. "Oh! SIR!!!" He looked more than a little weary and Keller knew why. "Nick, I swear it's actually me! And I can prove it, but to do so you have to come with me." "Yeah that sounds... Safe." "Unfortunately I'm not the one who needs to information in your head. Or I could just stand here." He winced as he realised it maybe wasn't the best choice of words "Urm. Look just... Come to my office..." He backed out with an attempt at a convincing smile and wandered down the corridor to his own work space.
As usual it was hard to get Maliyah to look inconspicuous. This time she put up a fair argument of she'd only be going car, to security door, and then to his office. Still, she was sitting in a top that cut across her shoulders AND exposed her stomach and a short, layered skirt that showed off her legs. The marks across her skin, and all his fault, were more than just visible. And the jacket she'd brought because he insisted she wore one, was of course emblazoned with her Nova Corp rank insignia. Geez... He almost thought about loosening his tie just looking at her. She was curled up in one of his chairs reading a file of his. He rolled his eyes, of course the first thing Maliyah would do was break into his cabinet. She had a stack in front of her too. Her shoes kicked off and left by the chair. "I've asked him. The rest is up to you." "Does he trust you?" She didn’t look up "Would you?!" "...Not entirely. Depends what Sim Keller did!!!" "Well it probably wasn't GOOD!!" He sat behind his desk and nodded to her files; "Careful with those." She turned a page towards him "Why do you have a Nova symbol?" "It’s a very complicated astrological algorithm..." Why she thought everything centred around the 8-point star of Xandar was beyond him. "... Did you do this..." she nodded to the algorithm itself "Yes" "You're a scientist!?" "Part time... I don't... Not all the time... I dabble..." "That's why you wanted my blood. Right?" "Your bloodwork is... Incredible." "You should have tried some Skrull blood if you think MINE is interesting." He was at least amused; "... Bit late for that advice!!" then tilted his head; "Does it… Change? Now we are... Now we have a...?" connection? Did her race give that a name? "Yes?" "We should do yours again." "Worry about your own." She noticed the way he furrowed his eyebrows in concern; "... What we did... It'll affect yours too." He stared at his hands with wide eyes "And I'm not entirely sure what being simed will do to you…" "Geez! I clearly just need to take you everywhere with me don't I!?" "I don’t wanna get Simed...!!!!" That was the wrong thing to say as his door opened.
Jonathan knew it, and Malyiah knew it by the way he put his head in his hands. She thought it was cute. She thought a lot of things humans did to display their emotions were cute. She hadn't known a race feel so acutely as this. She'd chosen well, she couldn't have ever expected to. He was the best surprise. Nick looked across to the female voice that had spoken and almost had a heart attack; He wasn’t faced with a straight-laced, suited, female S.H.I.E.L.D agent. Instead her purple fading to pink hair, eyes so deep blue they were purple, the mish-mash of clothes she was wearing - that still strangely matched - and the foreign markings visible every so often on her skin, like someone had tattooed her with white ink, made him think she wasn’t human at all. "Who the hell are--!?!" Jonathan Keller jumped quickly to her rescue; "Nick there's a lot of classified stuff that's happened in the last two years..." "Two years!? WHAT!?" "Remember that crash we were called to in Utah?" "... Yeah. Highest level. You were there ages... No-one ever spoke about it." "Yeah... Uh..." he brought his hands together and pointed across to the girl in the chair. "...Hi!" she smiled "You must be Nick Fury." He turned to Keller "Sir!!! Don't start telling me there's more of them!!! What is she S.H.I.E.L.D intelligence!?!" "... The fact there IS more of them is exactly why we NEED to tell her everything. But I was tied up in a Blockbuster ok, so I'm no help! You are." She was looking down at herself; did she look like S.H.I.E.L.D intelligence? Nick wasn’t sure he was following; "He employed you... Right? That's why you're here and you know everything...?" "No I'm not employed. HEY! Jonathan there's a thought!" "I'm not paying you. That's got implications I'd rather not have...!" If Maliyah didn’t catch on, Keller's agent did; "Wait---!! Are you two!?" Nick quickly grasped the situation as he pointed between the two of them. Keller nodded in silent admittance "It wasn't meant to be like that. I had to study her... But they were... It was inhumane Nick. I moved her out here... She's trying to get her ship back in order." Malyiah shrugged as if that wasn’t the explanation she would give; "I won't know what I'm gonna do until it's fixed. At the moment it's in a high security area back in Utah..." "Yeah, I've seen it. I didn't know there was anyone involved... So you know about the Kree? And Skrulls." Her jaw tightened at the mention of the Kree; "So they DID bring their war here." "I'm not sure it was intentional." she hummed, fingering the pages of the file she was reading for a second "And what happened? Where are they now?" "Gone. Why..." "Gone where!? Like gone, gone!?" Keller looked glad of that, juxtaposing Maliyah’s sudden panic. "She didn't say where she was taking them..." he narrowed his eyes "Whose side are you on!?" Fury wouldn’t risk Carol’s life. Never. "... I'm not really on anyone's side... BUT... I guess I align better with the Skrulls..." She gave a shrug. "... The war isn't my problem. Them siming Keller is my problem. The Kree out here with me here that's ALSO my problem. " " Maliyah..." It was Keller’s warning " I'm not trying to start anything!" she held her hands up and turned back to Nick; "You can't help me, but you know they’re all gone? " " We have a Flerken though... " "I can tell by your eye... " she tilted her head, reading Fury’s own emotions; "What are you afraid of?? Is it him or me?? I'm stronger than you Terrans are but I'm not dangerous... And he's him. But I can understand the wary feeling there... " Nick tried to make it look like he wouldn't be afraid of Keller and he didn't know what she was talking about... And it worked. For around half a second. He took a breath and pointed to his boss; "Prove he isn't one." "He's not. He reacts to me." "Prove you aren't one." "I doubt they can get my empathic abilities spot on... They can probably try, but I doubt that they can get their skin to react exactly the same... It’s a unique pattern... And it's triggered through a DNA reaction. A Skrull would need both, but it can only sim to one set of DNA... " "Hang on... What?! And - WHAT!?" Nick realised he hadn’t listened to her first explanation clearly. She took a breath; "Like this..." She watched him carefully as she guided years of evolution through her race to latch onto Keller... The feel of him around her was intense enough to let the bright lights flicker over her skin in all his shades. Nick was at least staring at her in wonder. "That's how you know I'm not one.” "... How does... That work?" She tilted her head "At first instance. For these unique patterns... Intimacy. Real physical intimacy. For anything more than that... For a real connection... Blood. His mixed with mine, mine with his." "That sounds... Painful…” His eyes flicked to Keller again, who was keeping his gaze locked on Maliyah; "Have you..." "No. I wouldn't ask that of him." She didn't like that Nick would insinuate that she would "It is by far a conversation for another time..." Nick at least noticed that Keller look uneasy, which settled him a little. He changed the flow of the conversation again; "Why are you so intent on knowing where they went?" She shook her head "I'm just trying to make sure they don't know about me. And the only way to do that is to check in on their simed memories." "I don't think they are much of a threat to you... Right?" "Huh." Maliyah folded her arms "I'd rather they didn't tie him up and sim him. Guess we'll let that one go too, huh?" He had to crack a smile, she wasn’t human. Obviously, but she was so human. He wondered if that was her upbringing or Keller’s influence; "Nick Fury, S.H.I.E.L.D Agent.” She stood to shake his hand; "Maliyah Saal. Nova Corps. Ravager Captain... Auron by way of Xandar... Pleasure to meet you." She gave him a warm smile, and it was like he instantly got why Keller had been taken in. She seemed strong, she had a sass about her that clearly EVERY extra terrestrial had... But she had an instant warmth... She turned to Keller which made Nick do the same; " I think we could be in the clear... Guess we'll need to keep a check on everything. " "You'd make a good agent. Are you sure we can't hire her!? " "Absolutely not." Keller let him know he thought he must be joking. She laughed, with a wink; "It's okay, Nick. My duty is to the Nova Corps. I leave S.H.I.E.L.D in the capable hands of its Human workers... "
**
" I think I've figured it out. " "What? " "The problem with your ship...? " "... At 3am!?" "You’re clearly not sleeping either..." She rolled over to stare at him. He was looking at the ceiling. His glasses were pushed up into his hairline and he was squinting "... No, I really think I've cracked it." "At least I was awake for something that wasn't stupidly thinking about fixing my damn ship." "No... But... I looked at your notes. You've been working on them for two years... I wanted to help... And formulate some for myself. I think I've got it Maliyah. I think I can get you home..." He turned to face her, but the look she gave was one of fear. "Don't you dare say that like I want to leave!" "Maliyah... You know it is dangerous for you to stay here... " He was extraordinarily calm. Like he was already letting her go. It only caused her to shake her head. "NO!" She buried herself in him; digging her nails into the skin of his arms and her head on his chest her colours burst into life and illuminated his darkened room. "Maliyah..." He ran a hand through her hair "... Let me let you go... Earth is not where you belong." She shook her head again; "Look at this..." He took her hand in his free one and lifted her arm, the way the colours danced for him. "Jonathan. I don't belong out there either... I belong with you." "I cannot protect you from your planet..." "Do not ask me to leave. I will not leave you." He was pretty sure she was crying... He gathered her close in his arms. "I'm human.... Maliyah... My race is breakable. It's vulnerable... It’s clear to me we have NO idea what’s really out there... You don't want this..." "Stop telling me what I want. I HAVE what I want." "Anywhere else in the world and I would believe that." "... What about anywhere else in the universe?" "Huh?" She looked at him, sadness in those purple-blue eyes... But something else too. An idea sparking to life: "If you can really help me fix my ship... Come with me. Come back to Xandar with me..." "Mali... I can't just leave..." "WHY!? Everything in your head we could use on Xandar." "Maybe... Maybe one day..." He said it softly "But your planet... If it’s at war.... It needs YOU and until you win; and you will win it my supernova... Until Earth gets a good grip on things out there... You cannot stay. And I cannot go."
** …10 Years Later… Maliyah piloted the Milano very cautiously. She knew the sector of space; just not as well as she would have liked. Kree these days were still running havok. Maybe not too much around Xandar... But things were shaky at best, which is why she was piloting her tiny Milano though this, rather than her Nova Corps star ship. The planet that Keller’s "distress signal" was coming from looked small and harmless. But it was the other side of the galaxy. Keller, even on Earth’s best space day, was not reaching here any time soon.
It made her hesitate. She shouldn't trust it, but what choice did she have? It didn't mean that someone hadn't taken Jonathan here, although that was unlikely it was not impossible. And it wasn't like it was a signal to her ship... Or any communications device. Keller’s very DNA and feelings were sending a direct signal to her. And for nothing in this known universe would she ignore something like that. Entering the planet’s atmosphere she knew exactly why the feeling was of distress. It looked dead. Or at least incinerated. The earth was scorched and there wasn't a trace of greenery or life anywhere. Yet, the feeling persisted. Which meant whatever was giving off Keller’s signal was here. And was very much alive.
She landed on about the clearest strip of land she could find that the Milano would fit into and took a deep breath. Whatever she was about to face would not be good. She was already suited up for Supernova... Hopefully she wouldn't have to use it. Exiting the Milano she kept her blaster holstered. She wouldn't fire unless fired upon and whoever did that would be making a big mistake.
Pillars of smoke rising from the debris made the perfect cover... She breathed in and out, closing her eyes she focused on what ‘Keller’ was feeling. It wasn't nice for her to feel it, either. She pinpointed a location in a matter of seconds and headed towards it. Only for her to start noticing the purple, everywhere. And it was blood. She continued through the mess of debris, every so often a body or two would present itself. They're Skrulls. She realised. The bodies were Skrulls. She knitted her eyebrows together. Carol Danvers, who she had met a few times whilst traversing the galaxy, had told her nearly everything to help her piece together what had happened when they were on Earth. She had given them a home, and finished the war. Clearly someone was trying to start it up again... And if this was the planet that Carol had made their haven. The Skrulls were from Earth. Which meant one thing... From what Keller had confessed to her that could mean only one thing... And it was something she didn't even think possible.
She sprinted to the signal on that notion alone; across the ground that kicked up with every step she took. What had the Kree done here!? Why was he still alive when so many others were not!?! She stopped. Suddenly tense. He was walking toward her. His stance was fighting and she could read those emotions a lot clearer now. Her race and its engineering had failed her. It was confusing Keller’s real DNA with simed DNA from years gone by. Hopefully that wasn't about to cost her her life. Upon recognising him, she took two steps back. She'd made a point of studying Skrulls as soon as Keller had mentioned them. Talos. And he was big news. Huge news. He was a General that ran a whole sector, he was a good leader. He'd simed her life partner. Maliyah held her hands up in an attempt to show she wasn't trouble, as far away from her weapon as possible... "I've come from Xandar. So... I'm not here to destroy you like everything else... Unless you don't care; in which case... You're much more of a threat to me..." He took a step forward, which made her concede another, he was studying her uniform carefully. The eight-point shining yellow star running from her chest down her abdomen, framed by a metallic light blue. The three-point ‘V’ of the Nova Corps shimmering just behind it, glowing faintly every so often. The rest of the uniform navy. Except the gold stripes up her boots. She thought she should have worn her Nova Corps over-jacket; multicoloured rank ribbons and clearer Corp red star emblazoned sleeves. Too late now, though.
He straightened, seeming satisfied but tilted his head. “Who are you?” She tilted hers in turn; “You should know. The fact that you don’t means he did real good to keep me out of his thoughts…” Or any part of his life. Keller’s desk, his car, his pager, his wallet. If nothing held the slightest trace of her then she owed Jonathan her very life. God, she knew that already. He looked confused, as he rightly should. “My name is Maliyah. Quite a few years ago when you were on Earth you simed a Terran known as Jonathan Richard Keller. Unbeknownst to YOU at the time of doing so I had already formed a connection with his DNA. Now, apparently, because siming creates an exact DNA copy of his - I have got some kind of connection with you.” “…You’re Auron.” She was more than a little surprised that he knew that, it made her smile; “Correct.” “Keller… Fury’s boss? How is he and his beautiful blue eyes.” She raised an eyebrow to a phrase she didn’t expect; “…That’s the man. And he’s well… No thanks to you and his constant reoccurring nightmare…” Every so often Jonathan would still wake up in cold sweats with the word simed coming off his lips – Usually it was drink induced, but telling him to stop drinking was pointless. She smiled, but it faded as she looked around her “…So… About this distress that I felt from half way across the Galaxy and came to investigate because Jonathan should be nowhere NEAR this sector… Human’s still haven’t figured out their space travel, God bless ‘em…” “…Well. It’s pretty obvious isn’t it.” “Yeah… Your distress signal tells me one thing I am grateful for. You need help. It looks like a lot of it. And I am here to offer my services... First off, you need to tell me what happened.” “Why should I trust you.” “You have no reason to, and I have no reason to trust you either – In fact I have LESS reason to trust you considering Keller – But Fury trusts you, and so does Carol. So. Yeah, I trust you. Just put a little faith in me…” His eyes flicked back to the Star emblazoned on her uniform and he nodded to it; "If you are really from Xandar then you know what happened." She swept the landscape with her eyes again "Kree... WHY!? It's over, your wars are over..." "There are those in the outside that think they should just end it." "... Is this planet all that’s left!?" "No... Thank god. There are still some of us back home..." She turned again, not wanting to voice it but feeling like she should know everything; "Are you...?? Did they..." "Not everyone. A few, as a statement. An example. My family... They are..." He looked to the stars for a minute "I don't know where they will have taken them but for now they are alive..." She followed the trace of his eyes "I can track that... I'm sure I can track that." She turned back to him; "Obviously first things first. I can't leave you here." "Oh really." She tilted her head at the sarcasm he was displaying. It wasn’t unlike that of her older brother. She couldn’t help but smile, Perhaps she would have more affinity with him than just Keller… "One, you're alone. Two, whatever this connection to Keller you have is... It won't let me leave "Keller" here. So. You simed the right guy. I guess... " Maliyah half turned back to her ship; but kept her eyes on him. He knew the reason she was putting faith in him was the same reason she was still standing over there looking at him like any moment he might change. Or change form. It looked more like a stand off than a potential team-up. Because Jonathan Keller for him was just a Terran male that worked for S.H.I.E.L.D had all the access codes and clearances he needed and eventually got him to his family. For Maliyah, Talos had inadvertently intervened with something sacred. The very fabric of her race’s evolution. Her relationship with Keller now blurred into him. And without this travesty none of them would be any the wiser. "Does he know?" "Jonathan? No. Why would he? I'm the only one that feels anything... He knows all the intricacies of what I am. Whether he understands them...” She afforded explanation with a shrug "He’s human. After all. About the only race out there not involved in the rest of the universe. And integrating even one of them isn't easy... But you should know that." She gave a small, mysterious smile, “So, congratulations. Siming Keller had consequences that you and I are both stuck with.” Talos folded his arms; for all her talk of helping, he hadn’t seen anything that would actually help them out yet. He decided to test that one; “How do we even get out of here… They’ve destroyed all the technology we had. You are some kind of… Supernova. So…” “Supernova is just the name, Jonathan used it all the time it kinda stuck, And I didn’t get here via the Nova Force...” Yet again Talos surprised her with just how much he knew… She wondered if he’d ever been to Xandar… If he’d ever Simed someone from there. Now was not the time to ask the question. “Then how DID you get here?!” She looked back at her Milano, now at least partially visible through the dust clouds as the sun hit the shiny paintwork, then turned to him with a significant look; “…Are we going to save your family, or not?”
#Talos#Keller#Captain Marvel#Captain Marvel spoilers#OC#KellerXOC#Ben Mendelsohn#Oh my god I wrote this TOO quick#But I don't care#I need more Keller in my life#Linzi Writes#Linzi Queues Things#Maliyah#7#Out Of Nowhere Girl#OONG
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Roland Harvey
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At the Beach By Roland Harvey
Roland Harvey was born in Melbourne and have been creating books ever since I was a child. More than 60 of them are real books and you can even buy some of them in bookshops or on the internet.
He really enjoy watching people at work and at play. Many of the characters in his illustrations are based on people he had seen, and sometimes his friends find themselves doing strange things in his books. It’s their fault for being his friends.
He had always loved the outdoors and some of the scenes from At the Beach and In the Bush are from real life. He really did make kelp sandals like the ones in At the Beach for my son, James! As they dried, they shrank until they were just doll-size.
He think learning and laughter go together really well. That’s why He created Sick As and My Place In Space. He had lots of ideas for other books like them.
He is best known as an illustrator of children's books using pen, ink and watercolour. His works have been described as 'witty slapstick style' and 'characteristic humorous and detailed illustrations'.
What are one to three books that have greatly influenced your life?
'The Eagle' magazine and compilation Eagle Annual which my father's family in England sent out for Christmas and birthdays after WW2, and a nature Annual called 'I Spy'.
The Eagle Starring Channing Tatum, Donald Sutherland, Jamie Bell, Mark Strong
Anything by Ronald Searle or Ralph Steadman,
'Titus Groan' by Mervyn Peake.
Titus Groan By Mervyn Peake
What purchase of $100 or less has most positively impacted your life in the last six months (or in recent memory)?
The purchase of a stylus pen for my iPad Pro, and software 'Adobe Draw'.
How has a failure, or apparent failure, sand et you up for later success?
Barging in to Coles without an appointment with some little cards I had printed, thinking Coles would love to buy them. (Ha Ha!) Next day walked out of buyer's office with an order for 400 000 packs of Aussie Christmas cards. Next year 2 500 000 packs.
Are there any quotes you think of often or live your life by?
I actually made this one up but later found Bob Dylan had already said it: "Life isn't about finding out who you are, or finding anything. It is about creating yourself".
What is one of the best investment in a writing resource you’ve ever made?
Aforementioned 'iPad Pro'. together with the Vector based 'Adobe Draw'. It became my notepad, sketchbook and idea development tool which even lets you backtrack and see a timelapse of your process. Magic.
What is an unusual habit or an absurd thing that you love?
Starting to sing when I stuff up badly. My dad used to sing in the trenches in WW1 and I got the same gene.
In the last five years, what new belief, behaviour, or habit has most improved your life?
Learning to trust my intuitive self. After much 'destruction testing' of course'. Unlock the genius! Ha.
What advice would you give to a smart, driven aspiring author? What advice should they ignore?
Read a lot of what you like. Write and draw in your own style, (which will change and develop over time) and if you are not happy with it don't let an editor change it - take a different approach, yourself. Although editorial input did pay off big time for Possum Magic...
What are bad recommendations for aspiring authors, that you hear in your often?
There are plenty of editors, friends, family, salesmen, etc who will want to own what you are doing. Beware. On the other hand, listen for the gems that sometimes peep around a corner in the gloom.
Beware also the enthusiastic "That's brilliant / hilarious" etc unless you know it is.
In the last five years, what have you become better at saying no to (distractions, invitations, etc.)?
The bizarre expectation of doing everything for nothing or a measly government budget, being beaten down in price, or doing more than the original (probably bad) brief called for, for no extra. You can be sure they're not working for nothing.
What marketing tactics should authors avoid?
Agreeing to ridiculous out-of-your-depth engagements such as the Keynote speech at the Australasian Literacy Conference in W.A when you have zero qualifications in any of the subject areas. (I drew my way through it and it was ok.)
Say no to the Frankston Rotary Club Annual after dinner speech. They don't know what a kid's book is.
What new realizations and/or approaches helped you achieve your goals?
I realised that I don't really know how my mind works. I just have to let it off the leash and see what it does. Trust your intuition. And keep track of what it does. (That's where I'm finding the iPad to be great).
When you feel overwhelmed or unfocused, or have lost your focus temporarily, what do you do?
Have a change of scenery, run/walk/fish/play guitar. Drink. Look at the deadline written in the contract. Try something quite different, answer emails, make myself feel guilty about something so doing some work is a relief.
Any other tips?
Don't give up. Give yourself a secret pat on the back occasionally and learn to recognise people who are out to destroy your confidence. Get rid of them. Look back at your work occasionally and recognise stuff you really still like, and ask yourself "Have I strayed too far from what I do best?"
________
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what sorts of fanworks should I be prioritizing?
*waves shyly* Hi, it’s your friendly neighborhood service-oriented ISFJ here. As you know, I like making All The Things! Especially RHBBC fandom related things since there’s…I wouldn’t say a great demand relatively, considering it’s a small fandom, but the supply end of the symbolic market isn’t so saturated so to speak. Anyway, my inferior Ne is totally down with the breadth of mediums of Things I have the capabilities of dabbling in, but it’s very easy for it to get, let’s say, unfocused. And while I enjoy having the freedom to hop from gif making to video editing to struggling to articulate my character meta-ish thoughts in writing, completing these things is a heckuva lot more fulfilling (imagine that). And there hasn’t been very much of that for awhile now. Lately, I’ve been feeling my production motivation has been bogged down in large part because of all the options I have. They’re all good options! There’s just too many of them.
Putting it into words makes it seem like such an insignificant problem. How silly is it that I can’t choose what to do with my free time? It’s not stopping me altogether from working on stuff, but I think it’s definitely slowed me down significantly. I think if I had a more focused idea of what is most important that I work on right now? then I’d be a lot more productive. And that’s where I’d love to get some imput from all of you lovely people–as theoretical ‘consumers’–if you happen to have any preferences?
This is all stuff I’m��personally interested in making–and most everything listed is in progress to some degree–but I want to know what you would like to see from me ‘cause I put a very high value on that too.
WRITING:
fic (basically exclusive to RHBBC and Allan-focused): the ‘hole-in-the head’ fic (with illustration!)(I waffle so much on whether I should start posting it as a wip on, say, a monthly basis.); the version of the hp/rh maruaders’ era crossover that lives in my head; I’ll never give up on shades of light, never; etc.
meta
the MBTI Allan Manifesto (yes it is all my fault Erin and I haven’t done a RH personality profile in a year and a half *quiet, guilty sobs*)
discussing Allan and anxiety in which I realize the key concept wrt how I characterize Allan
whoops I should probably finish filling out my own Allan personality trait survey /o\
GRAPHICS/GIFS:
RH episode gifsets
Allan reacts to Robin series (with occaisonal accompanying written meta. just wait until we reach 1x12 my friends. it’s gonna be gr9.) (the interest in these seems to have waned a bit the past year, but this is totally something I can easily self-motivate myself for.)
RH character summaries gifsets
Allan smiles compilation gifset
Djaq appreciation gifset
Jedi!Outlaws
once upon a time some of you sent in ‘make me choose’ requests and I swear I intend to get to them sometime in the next decade
more stuff along the lines of parks & hood and ham4hood
alllllllll of the lyrics/quotes/what-have-you inspiration grahpics (mostly) for RHBBC (It’s a little bit scary just how many I have saved away for reference… That said, do you have an idea of a certain one that you’d like to see right away? Tell meeee! Exactly what this post is for.)
I’d think it be fun to do one of those ‘get to know me’ memes too
DIGITAL ART:
I have finally procured a device I can use as a drawing tablet! Which means I can start flexing my drawing muscles again and do digital painting(!!!) and not have to go through the time consuming process of sketching and scanning and trying to use a mouse as a pen and so forth. I’m a little bit excited. :)
Top Secret 3 Musketeers illustration, has been in progress for like 6 months already via the time consuming way so it might not be quite my best work but it has HEART OKAY
certain cherished scenes from aforementioned hp/rh crossover
tag yourself meme: robin hood edition with hand drawn portraits of the characters cuz it’s gonna be SUPER CUTE
I can keep my promises to Mirjam and Mel to illustrate their fics! (If we still want to do that. My deal with Mirjam was if she wrote otp: love hurts, I’d draw it, and this happened, so… You might not remember, Mel, bc it was a loooong time ago but I once mentioned I had an idea for a piece based on the high school band au with Will and Allan.)
I sorta have this idea for The 100 characters + patronuses project, so if anyone has thoughts on that hit me up, but there’s no reason why that can’t migrate to other fandoms too…
VIDEOS:
Basically I’m overflowing with vid ideas for about a half dozen fandoms? It’s…under control. *sweats nervously* Oh, also, more RH crackvids.
MISC:
Remember that one time I decided to make character plushies and it was going along pretty well until I got distracted by making stuffed wolves from the wolfpack AU? Good times, good times. *half-bald Robin plushie stares at me accusingly*
#*tamps down 'who could possibly care about this' anxiety long enough to post*#i hate these irrational bouts of frantic worrying about my social connections#because heaven forbid my fe not feel constantly reassured that i am loved and matter to people#so i wrote this instead#*buries head in arms while pleading with my brain to stoppppp*#random musings of a personal nature
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The best ways to Deal with and address Mediahub.exe Mistake?
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What is Grief? And 5 Ways to Deal With Grief
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Long time no see my Tumblr readers :) Since my last post I’m guessing many of you might we worried to see such a topic come up on my blog. Well fret no with most things that don’t get revealed on social media.. Life happened and with that comes the Circle of Life.
Post Dedication: Without getting into too much personal details, I wanted to dedicate this post to anyone who heart is in immense pain over a lost of a love one (whether direct relative or not) I believe with such conviction that God has a reason for every season & the pain you feel now. Albeit temporary but this season will shape you in ways you’ll soon discover.
On a personal note, hi my dear love of my life, I’m sorry for the lost you’ve had to experience. I know that my words alone cannot do much but I want you to know that what happened is no ones fault & that she is a better place. I’ll continue to hold your heart & hand - walk alongside you till you heal & find peace. Love you more than you know.
This might be a long read for some so do grab yourself a warm cup of tea, coffee or beverage of choice & enjoy [Reading Time: 5-10 minutes]
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You don’t have to be linguist to know the core topic of this post would fall under the 1st definition & NOT the 2nd. Nothing complicated about the emotion of ‘Grief’ - ‘Intense sorrow’ which in most cases is due to a lost of beautiful soul.
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It’s worth keeping in mind that everyone grieves differently. Just like how all personalities are different with no two the same - this treatment is similar for Grief. Some people will wear their emotions on their sleeve and others will experience their grief more internally, and some may not even cry (believe it out not). We should try & not judge how a person experiences their Grief, as each person will experience it differently.
1. Denial & Isolation
The first stage to learning about the terminal illness, loss, or death of a cherished loved one is to deny the reality of the situation.
“This isn’t happening, this can’t be happening,” people often think.
It is a normal reaction to rationalize overwhelming emotions. It is a defense mechanism that buffers the immediate shock of the loss. We block out the words and hide from the facts. This is a temporary response that carries us through the first wave of pain.
2. Anger
As the masking effects of denial and isolation begin to wear, reality and its pain re-emerge. We are not ready. The intense emotion is deflected from our vulnerable core, redirected and expressed instead as anger. The anger may be aimed at inanimate objects, complete strangers, friends or family. Anger may be directed at our dying or deceased loved one. Rationally, we know the person is not to be blamed. Emotionally, however, we may resent the person for causing us pain or for leaving us. We feel guilty for being angry, and this makes us more angry.
3. Bargaining
The normal reaction to feelings of helplessness and vulnerability is often a need to regain control–
If only we had sought medical attention sooner…
If only we got a second opinion from another doctor…
If only we had tried to be a better person toward them…
Secretly, we may make a deal with God or our higher power in an attempt to postpone the inevitable. This is a weaker line of defense to protect us from the painful reality.
4. Depression
Two types of depression are associated with mourning.
The first one is a reaction to practical implications relating to the loss. Sadness and regret predominate this type of depression. We worry about the costs and burial. We worry that, in our grief, we have spent less time with others that depend on us. This phase may be eased by simple clarification and reassurance. We may need a bit of helpful cooperation and a few kind words.
The second type of depression is more subtle and, in a sense, perhaps more private. It is our quiet preparation to separate and to bid our loved one farewell. Sometimes all we really need is a hug.
5. Acceptance
Reaching this stage of mourning is a gift not afforded to everyone. Death may be sudden and unexpected or we may never see beyond our anger or denial. It is not necessarily a mark of bravery to resist the inevitable and to deny ourselves the opportunity to make our peace. This phase is marked by withdrawal and calm. This is not a period of happiness and must be distinguished from depression.
Loved ones that are terminally ill or aging appear to go through a final period of withdrawal. This is by no means a suggestion that they are aware of their own impending death or such, only that physical decline may be sufficient to produce a similar response. Their behavior implies that it is natural to reach a stage at which social interaction is limited. The dignity and grace shown by our dying loved ones may well be their last gift to us.
Source: https://psychcentral.com/lib/the-5-stages-of-loss-and-grief/
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At the end of the day, how you deal with Grief is a personal journey & should not be influenced by this post nor anyone else who imposes their views on you. However in knowing that there is no fix template to dealing with Grief, many a times we can get stuck in feel lost for a long time - weeks, months or even years.
Take these as thoughts you can ponder on as you re-navigate you way back to the starting point which seems to have be blurred.
*Worth noting that these are ways that I have help me in my time of losing a love one as well - as such is personal & individual not the law*
1. Release
“Those who know your name trust in you, for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you.” - Psalm 9:10 (NIV)
When I think of 'Release’, I mediate on the idea that I have someone or something to upload my emotions to. Something to almost fully take away what was once burdening ones heart & to ease that burden. I see it in 2 phases when it comes to ‘Release’: (1) Choice - to make the deliberate choice to no longer bear the weight of the load on your own & to surrender it to a higher authority or power (2) Letting go - to organically let your heart rest & the burden eases.
A few tangible activities that can help one achieve ‘Release’:
i. Meditation Whether it be a early morning walk or quiet time in the morning, making time to be still & to regulate the voices clouding ones heart & mind proves to be highly beneficial in the process of Grief. Making that physical choice to do so will make all the difference.
ii. Counselling Most people see this in a form of a person, i.e. medical counselling, how I see it is in engaging the the thing that you resist doing in terms of expressing your emotions. This will look different for many people - for me, it looks like sharing a thing or two more about how I’m feeling to the people around me who love me or even taking time to pray & seek god. Figure out what you resist in terms of expressing your emotions & work on small steps in doing it.
iii. Sleep This is probably more so relevant for those of you who on a normal day already struggle with sleep (i.e. partial insomnia or medical insomnia). In your time of Grief, you will see this to be a painful & almost burdensome activity especially when all your emotions seem to cloud any form of physical rest. I personally find that a quick purchase of a form of aromatherapy (i.e. room spray, essential oils, aroma diffuser) is a good place to start to unwind. Taking practical steps to get you or your family members to bed is important - is reduces tension & allows you to get back to your normal routine quickly.
2. Talk ‘aka’ Communication
A brief mention of talking to love ones was discussed above but still I believe that this requires a category of its own especially so when internalizing pain - which ultimately is the biggest ‘Resistance Factor’ when moving thru the stages of Grief. Whether it be talking to a person, object, spirit or even engaging in any form of communication (i.e. online, offline, written, spoken, heard) it is important to remember that communication is key.
Some activities to consider:
i. Blogpost / Letter Writing / Instagram Post / Journalling Just as I’m typing through this entry, it brings back memories of the passing of my grandfather when I was 19. My heart still aches but I look back at the time that has passed & have seen how far I have come since then. I find that writing gives one a 360 degree vantage point of things. The ability to look to the past, present & future just by penning down your thoughts. It also helps to be able to ‘Release’ pent up emotions & leave it on ‘paper’.
ii. Painting / Drawing My twin sister brought meditative art to my attention when she curated ‘My Heart on Me’ - an avenue for anyone to be empowered through life. Through art, we will begin to unpack your experiences, thoughts, fears, hopes and dreams to be revealed more in yourself. Believing and knowing that the ups and downs of life, and for explanations beyond our comprehension, has made you you- perfect and wonderful. For more click here - https://www.facebook.com/myheartonme/
iii. Community Groups / Spiritual Huddles This is one that most Christians would be familiar with in terms of Life Groups, Cell Groups, Bible Study Groups, etc. However is not exclusive to the religion - church groups may appear to be exclusive in nature however do not be mislead many Christian groups are the direct opposite - constantly with their arms open to journey will anyone who may need it. Should spiritual groups not be your cup of team - Many secular organizations have community group that allow for public participation as well,
3. Prayer
Prayer in my journey of Grief has been the MOST pinnacle factor that enabled me to embark on my personal journey of healing. For some background, I’ve lived my life since birth as a 2nd generation Methodist christian which basically means that I was born into the faith with no prior knowledge of ‘Why’ which therefore just meant that I was a Methodist christian. As you’d expect, growing up with the faith was filled with countless ‘highs’ & ‘lows’. It was only when I was baptized at the age of 19 (2012) - after the death of my grand father (2011) which was when I woke up to how blessed my life had been & how much I had relied on my faith without even truly knowing how much Grace & Mercy has been bestowed on me. You see the death of my grandfather came alongside a series of events - I did up a fundraiser - Project Overturned Closet for cancer patients in 2012 which opened my eye to much which in turn healed my broken heart. I truly believe that all that stemmed from that singular ‘come hell or high water’ prayer that I said when my life seemed to be in a pit of endless despair. Personally, I cannot deny that tipping point in my life that broke the shackle of Grief & allowed me to heal.
4. Preserve Good Memories Only
This possibly might be one of the first few actions engaged in by many when Grieving - looking at old photos, videos, social media post when ‘they’ were once living. I find that this luxury is highly correlated to the relationship one has with the passed on individual. Estranged relationships or traumatic events can sometimes hinder one from seeing the Good in these memories. Albeit easier said than done, it helps to come to a stage when one is able to look back on memories that were once beautiful rather than painful, memories that were once victorious rather than defeated, memories of blessing rather than regrets. Some thoughts (of the deceased) kick start the process - ‘Remember only focus on the Good’:
i. What was the most accomplishing moment in his/her life? ii. Recall the a fond memory you shared with him/her? iii. What are the positive character traits of him/her? Iv: What are some of memories of him/her that you’ll treasure forever?
5. Say ‘No’ to Negativity
This point may almost seem silly to some people - ‘if I could so ‘No’ to negative thoughts, wouldn’t I have done it already? - Well my point of view comes from a more deliberate & physical method of saying ‘No’ to Negative Company & Comments that might surround you in this time of Grief. Ever had someone have tendencies to blame everything & everyone around them without vetting through their thoughts or actions? Ever had bad company ask you to engage in mindless, thoughtless or even illegal activities just to forget? Ever been peer pressured to ‘fuck it’ & not bother about your loves ones in Grief? Ever had someone around you make an insensitive remark & not feel apologetic about it? Those are a few scenarios of Negativity manifesting into life that proves to be more detrimental than it may appear to be. In moments like these, I believe that ‘Guarding ones Heart’ has never been made more important. It does not make you a bad person by saying ‘No’ or even being adamant about saying ‘No’ to these moments of Negativity. You are allowed to Grief & should be able to Grief in your own time; anyone who says otherwise is foolish & deluded.
Some way to say ‘No’ to Negativity:
i. I think that’s enough. What’s done it done, please don’t make the situation any worst than it should be. ii. I don’t think attending that party will help me with my pain. I won’t be going. iii. My family needs me now. I think I’ll be staying by them. iv. That not a nice thing you just said. Do hope that you’ll be respectful about what has happened.
And with that I’ve come to the end of the post. I just want to say that this read is in no way a blogpost telling you what you should do or must do. Like I’ve mentioned it’s just a way of locating the starting point when you seem at a lost & are unsure of how to move on in your process of Grief.
I hope that this has helped at least 1 person out there going through a difficult time in their life. Just remember that there is always someone who loves you & is waiting for you with open arms to heal your pain.
Well Yeap! That’s all from me! Let me know what you think!
Pop A Question in the ‘Ask-Me-Anything’ Tab Above <3
OR EVEN IF YOU NEED A LISTENING EAR TO UNLOAD YOUR PROBLEMS. DO DROP ME A COMMENT. YOU’RE NEVER ALONE!
Roman 12:2 Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is–his good, pleasing and perfect will.
Remember beauty is about being comfortable in your own skin. No one has the power to make you feel less than you really are.
#grief and loss#grief#death#rip#losing a loved one#losing a friend#losing a parent#losing a grandparent#losing family
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Roland Harvey
Roland Harvey was born in Melbourne and have been creating books ever since I was a child. More than 60 of them are real books and you can even buy some of them in bookshops or on the internet.
He really enjoy watching people at work and at play. Many of the characters in his illustrations are based on people he had seen, and sometimes his friends find themselves doing strange things in his books. It’s their fault for being his friends.
He had always loved the outdoors and some of the scenes from At the Beach and In the Bush are from real life. He really did make kelp sandals like the ones in At the Beach for my son, James! As they dried, they shrank until they were just doll-size.
He think learning and laughter go together really well. That’s why He created Sick As and My Place In Space. He had lots of ideas for other books like them.
He is best known as an illustrator of children's books using pen, ink and watercolour. His works have been described as 'witty slapstick style' and 'characteristic humorous and detailed illustrations'.
What are one to three books that have greatly influenced your life?
'The Eagle' magazine and compilation Eagle Annual which my father's family in England sent out for Christmas and birthdays after WW2, and a nature Annual called 'I Spy'.
Anything by Ronald Searle or Ralph Steadman,
'Titus Groan' by Mervyn Peake.
What purchase of $100 or less has most positively impacted your life in the last six months (or in recent memory)?
The purchase of a stylus pen for my iPad Pro, and software 'Adobe Draw'.
How has a failure, or apparent failure, sand et you up for later success?
Barging in to Coles without an appointment with some little cards I had printed, thinking Coles would love to buy them. (Ha Ha!) Next day walked out of buyer's office with an order for 400 000 packs of Aussie Christmas cards. Next year 2 500 000 packs.
Are there any quotes you think of often or live your life by?
I actually made this one up but later found Bob Dylan had already said it: "Life isn't about finding out who you are, or finding anything. It is about creating yourself".
What is one of the best investment in a writing resource you’ve ever made?
Aforementioned 'iPad Pro'. together with the Vector based 'Adobe Draw'. It became my notepad, sketchbook and idea development tool which even lets you backtrack and see a timelapse of your process. Magic.
What is an unusual habit or an absurd thing that you love?
Starting to sing when I stuff up badly. My dad used to sing in the trenches in WW1 and I got the same gene.
In the last five years, what new belief, behaviour, or habit has most improved your life?
Learning to trust my intuitive self. After much 'destruction testing' of course'. Unlock the genius! Ha.
What advice would you give to a smart, driven aspiring author? What advice should they ignore?
Read a lot of what you like. Write and draw in your own style, (which will change and develop over time) and if you are not happy with it don't let an editor change it - take a different approach, yourself. Although editorial input did pay off big time for Possum Magic...
What are bad recommendations for aspiring authors, that you hear in your often?
There are plenty of editors, friends, family, salesmen, etc who will want to own what you are doing. Beware. On the other hand, listen for the gems that sometimes peep around a corner in the gloom.
Beware also the enthusiastic "That's brilliant / hilarious" etc unless you know it is.
In the last five years, what have you become better at saying no to (distractions, invitations, etc.)?
The bizarre expectation of doing everything for nothing or a measly government budget, being beaten down in price, or doing more than the original (probably bad) brief called for, for no extra. You can be sure they're not working for nothing.
What marketing tactics should authors avoid?
Agreeing to ridiculous out-of-your-depth engagements such as the Keynote speech at the Australasian Literacy Conference in W.A when you have zero qualifications in any of the subject areas. (I drew my way through it and it was ok.)
Say no to the Frankston Rotary Club Annual after dinner speech. They don't know what a kid's book is.
What new realizations and/or approaches helped you achieve your goals?
I realised that I don't really know how my mind works. I just have to let it off the leash and see what it does. Trust your intuition. And keep track of what it does. (That's where I'm finding the iPad to be great).
When you feel overwhelmed or unfocused, or have lost your focus temporarily, what do you do?
Have a change of scenery, run/walk/fish/play guitar. Drink. Look at the deadline written in the contract. Try something quite different, answer emails, make myself feel guilty about something so doing some work is a relief.
Any other tips?
Don't give up. Give yourself a secret pat on the back occasionally and learn to recognise people who are out to destroy your confidence. Get rid of them. Look back at your work occasionally and recognise stuff you really still like, and ask yourself "Have I strayed too far from what I do best?"
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