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bulkyphrase · 1 year ago

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Smutty Stony Rec List

I wrote this in the notes of a post like a year and a half ago and I’m finally delivering! This list is both the fulfillment of that ancient promise, and an Xmas present for the Steve server’s #stony-nsfw channel.

I am very skewed towards bottom Steve, so if that’s not your jam you can probably safely skip this list.

Enjoy, and Happy Holidays!

Got You Under My Skin by BlossomsintheMist ( @cherryblossomsmist) (Ults | Explicit | 26,115 words)

Summary: “I’d be happy to show you a good time,” Tony said, smiling a little obscurely, Steve thought, as if to himself, but still with that warm, knowing look, affectionate and oddly fond, “any time you want.” Steve Rogers goes to Tony Stark's birthday party. Things progress from there, with a lot of flirtiness leading to propositions, and propositions leading to, well, what comes next, and Steve isn't even sure what he wants after that. Set in the Marvel Ultimate Universe, and written for the 2014 Cap_Ironman Reverse Big Bang. Art by wiredoll, here.

Baby, You Can Drive My Car by BlossomsintheMist (@cherryblossomsmist) (616 | Explicit | 7,485 words)

Summary: “Nothing but the best for my best guy,” and this time, Steve’s groan was soft and shuddering and all about Tony calling him that old-fashioned phrase, it never failed to make him feel warm and, and soft, and cared for, the way Tony always managed to do so damn well, “this is the Lamborghini of fucking machines, all right? Written for Day Ten of Kinktober: Fucking Machine.

Chapter 19 by blue_jack (MCU | Explicit | 5,098 words)

Summary: Anyone who was anyone knew about Captain America.

The rest are below the cut!

I’ma Bite Your Feelings Out by blue_jack (MCU | Explicit | 4,174 words)

Summary: “I’m sorry, but we have to do what?” Steve asked, sure he’d misunderstood. “I said that someone needs to have sex with Tony,” Dr. Strange told him, sounding annoyed that he had to repeat himself, as if Tony weren’t currently a wolf, standing six feet tall at the shoulder. A little bit of clarification wasn’t too much to ask for.

Exhausted by FestiveFerret (@festiveferret) (MCU | Explicit | 2,764 words)

Summary: “You going to sleep, love?” Tony asked, and Steve nodded. “You okay with keeping the collar on?” Tony knew Steve understood what he was asking for - as much as he knew how badly Steve wanted this.

Exposed by FestiveFerret, SirSapling (@festiveferret, @sirsapling) (Ults | Explicit | 5,979 words)

Summary: Of all the people Steve could be stuck with while this agonizing drug surged through him, of course, it had to be Tony Stark.

Not In Kansas Anymore by fohatic (@fohatic) (MCU | Explicit | Rape/Non-Con | 28,585 words)

Summary: It was truly uncanny, how alike they both were. His voice. His mannerisms. His meticulously-groomed facial hair. If he didn't know any better, Steve would've thought that it was the same man he’d left back on Earth-617... The only noticeable difference between them was that look in his eyes... Steve hadn't missed it, the way that this Tony was watching him as if he were a rabbit that had wandered into a tiger's lair, regarding him with an unsettling sort of amusement as he invited him deeper into the penthouse, brown eyes sharp and smoldering with something that Steve didn't recognize. Steve Rogers attempts to covertly gather intel on a mysterious weapon from a parallel universe's Tony Stark, and ends up in a predicament that he never saw coming.

if love is a jungle by fohatic (@fohatic) (MCU | Explicit | 15,393 words)

Summary: It was Tony's wet dream and worst nightmare all rolled up into one.

Perfect Body by IronShield (MCU | Explicit | Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings | 12,677 words)

Summary: Steve Rogers is struggling with his sexual desires, he doesn't know if he should share them with anyone. One day, out of curiosity he reads some SteveXTony fanfiction and Tony wonders if the fanfic matches up the the real deal. The first chapter sets it up, chapter 2 and on will contain all the smut!

Ravenous by IronShield (MCU | Explicit | Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings | 14,362 words)

Note: Not exclusively Stony, but it is the main ship

Summary: Sequel to "Perfect Body" Steve keeps thinking about the promise Tony made. Now Steve wants to fulfill his body's every desire once again and get with a few other Avengers.

girls can't play guitar by isozyme (@isozyme) (Ults | Explicit | 4,209 words)

Summary: On nights when Tonia fucked Eve, Eve left her bed sated and woke up with a guilty desire to walk into Tonia’s room, strip off her kevlar uniform, and surrender herself to whatever Tonia wanted to do next. Captain Eve Rogers has a complicated relationship with sex and masculinity. Tonia Stark has a really big strap.

what it looks like (from the outside) by isozyme (@isozyme) (616, Ults | Explicit | 5,786 words)

Summary: “I talked to Rogers,” Tony said. His tone was edged with wheedling — Tony was building up towards asking for something. “And now I need your opinion: what are your feelings on threesomes?” “With Rogers?” Steve asked, surprised. Steve certainly — surely — probably — didn’t approve of threesomes. Even if Tony asked for it, in his haughty, affected way, the way that said it was all a joke until you said yes, Steve would — he wouldn’t say yes. He certainly wouldn’t have thought other-him would go for it. “No, with a platypus,” Tony teased. “Yes, obviously, with Rogers.” Commander Rogers from Earth 616 comes to visit Ultimates Steve and Tony. They have a threesome with feelings. That’s it, that’s the fic.

All the Love You Hold and Hide by Mireille (MCU | Explicit | 17,294 words)

Summary: On a mission, Steve triggers a booby trap that turns out to be a skeevy sex curse, of the "fuck or die" variety. Tony volunteers as tribute.

Under The Spell by Ridley160 (MCU | Explicit | Rape/Non-Con | 23,125 words)

Summary: Steve gets doused with a heat inducing sex pollen from a giant centipede that Tony has been researching. Wild with a fiery desire Steve bends to the will and whim of the creature, allowing it to use his body in any way it pleases. Tony attempts to talk Steve out of it and get him away from the bug, but he too is subjected to the monster's pollen, and finds himself unable to resist the temptations. Then there is finding how to deal with the aftermath. Heed the tags

Little Red Button by scribblywobblytimeylimey (MCU | Explicit | Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings | 6,298 words)

Summary: Sequel to 'All There in the Manual' for firelordstark: “[I]t would be interesting if roleplaying an android were an actual kink of his and not just his subconscious trying to construct a situation where Tony would be interested in him.” (What do you know? Freud was right.) Tony takes so well to Steve's suggestion he starts to wish he'd mentioned it sooner. It's easy to believe the rest of it – that he's the sex-toy android Tony built for when Steve's not around, built to please him, modded within an inch of his life to react to pressure sensors in all the right places – when Tony's even gone as far as to integrate a voice modification filter that fits like a gag but lets out every last sound, not quite in Steve's voice, but flattened a little with a tinny edge, just like he *would* sound if he *were* a robot sex toy. And that's not even all of it. One of these days, he's going to learn to never underestimate Tony Stark.

In the Springtime of His Voodoo by shaenie (MCU | Explicit | 9,821 words)

Summary: “I’m removing Captain Rogers from this base, but not from active duty. I want him as SHIELD’s liaison to Stark Industries first and foremost. He’ll report directly to me,” Fury says. “As it is, your identity as Captain America is not public knowledge and it will remain that way until I say otherwise. That said, if you think you can get Tony Stark to work with you if you disclose that information, you have permission to do so.” Also available as a podfic read by paraka (@paraka)

Satiety by Sinope (MCU | Explicit | 956 words)

Summary: From a kinkmeme prompt: Tony builds a fucking machine designed specifically for Steve. It fucks him for hours, through multiple orgasms until he's sore to the point of crying and begs for it to stop. Once Steve can't come anymore, Tony unties him and plays with his sore hole. Then he fucks him. Afterwards, he licks his cum out of Steve. Contains exactly what it says on the box.

A Particular Style by sinuous_curve (MCU | Explicit | 3,640 words)

Summary: “The erotic tale of one camp counselor’s descent into lesbian madness?” Toni rattles off the summary, pressing the back of her hand to her forehead in a swoon that Steph can’t see. “I can’t fault your taste. It was always one of my favorites.”

Simple Biology by stark-contrast (dweetwise) (@dweetwise) (MCU | Explicit | 9,925 words)

Summary: “God, I'm sweating bullets in this thing,” Tony said, already unzipping his undersuit. “It’s not just me, right? It feels like a sauna in here.” And Steve's resolve crumbled by each inch of sweat-slick skin that was revealed. Or, Tony gets hit by sex pollen. Fortunately, Steve is there to help out—if only the guilt complex would let him.

#stony #marvel fic rec #steve rogers #tony stark #also there’s so much sex pollen on this list #this is also the last rec list of the year so expect some statistics as soon as i update the rec list spreadsheet

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my-rose-tinted-glasses · 26 days ago

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Do you have any favorite bl dramas or bl series that you watched that came out this year? What are they if you have any?

Hello anon. For sure I do. I've actually been thinking about this as the end of the year is approaching but since there are still a couple of shows to go, I haven't properly started thinking about my lists. Last year it took me forever so I wanted to start earlier this year, but just like what I say every year about shopping for xmas presents, I doubt I'll actually do it. But since you graced my inbox I'll give you some of my faves who will definitely come up in my end of year lists.

Let's start with Thailand and a couple of my fave og pairs that graced our screens this year.

Cherry Magic Thailand

I love all Cherry Magic versions. They are all different and special in their own way. Of course you give me cherry magic and TayNew and do it right, and it's pretty much perfection in my book. They are lovely and this show was a joy.

The Trainee

I love them. I will watch them always. Was it perfect? Nope. That whole separation bit was silly. But the ensemble was great to watch, it was funny, and the workplace drama I thought was realistic. I'm thinking I might still rewatch this one again this year if I have the time.

Korea was strong this year, and the year started great with

Love for Love's Sake

I have a hard time finding the words to talk about this show so I'll keep it brief. It was original, devastating and beautiful. And it gave us the blorbo of all time.

Time of Fever

This one released all episodes at once but the brainrot lasted a couple of months. I like to think of it as a stand alone piece and it destroyed me in the best way. It was so well acted and so beautifully shot. Just looking at them makes my heart hurt. Although in my head they had a happy ending and ULS is a completely different show.

And last but obviously not least, and this pains me to say, it was kind of a mixed bag for Japan this year. There was still plenty of good stuff though.

Sugar Dog Life

As you can see from my choice of pfp, I love Isumi a normal amount. This show was such an amazing surprise. I've rewatched twice since it ended so it's becoming one of my comfort watches. It was so wholesome and adorable and the besties were amazing, and the food as usual played an important part. I love it so much.

A Man Who Defies the World of BL 3

He came back to us!!!! I love all the seasons, but this one is probably my favourite. It's so funny. Hatano was such an interesting addition and I still want to know more about him. The only problem with this show is that it was only 6 episodes.

I really need to start thinking about this so I can hopefully talk about this year's shows a bit better. But this is what I got for you today Anon. Have a good night and thanks for dropping by.

#cherry magic th #the trainee #love for love's sake #the time of fever #sugar dog life #zettai bl 2024 #rose answers #rose's favourite things

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fabeong · 20 days ago

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Questions from the Fic Writing Game :)

✅ list one or two favorite lines you’ve written and explain why they’re your favorite

💕 what's your favorite part of your writing process?

🔚 have you ever completely changed the direction a piece was going?

🔥 what’s something that’s currently going really well?

Oh mate, you’ve really chosen some good ones here thank you 💕

✅ list one or two favorite lines you’ve written and explain why they’re your favorite

MATE. Ok you know how this says one or two lines yeah sorry I’m dropping a paragraph but I think you might like it 👀

(Under a cut bc I go on a ramble whoopsies)

“I know your surname is Toktra, and it means to search for” Florentius spoke softly, thoughtfully; the memories rose all too easily to his lips. “Your hometown is on the north… no, north-eastern tip of the Alik’ir desert, though you haven’t been back in years. You like cloudy weather the most although you’ll accept the sun because it hurts vampires, and your favourite colour is yellow. You find any flute music intolerable and you joined the Vigilants at thirteen years old, to this day still the youngest they’ve ever accepted. And…” suddenly he was fighting against a smile, only as soon as he looked over at Isran at last he lost it and collapsed into helpless laughter. “And you’re allergic to figs, as we found out at that pastry stall in Bruma, and your face-“ “Went so numb I could barely speak.” Isran finished the memory for him, a smile somewhere between reluctant and irrepressible fighting onto his lips. Florentius nodded, his chuckles finally subsiding though his chest ached. When had he last laughed like that? The last thing he expected was for Isran to speak again. “Your first name is Silas.” His voice was so quiet it was almost inaudible over the snowfall outside. But Florentius heard him. “But it’s technically your father’s name. It’s an old Cyrodillic naming tradition where your first name is your father’s, your second is your given name, the third is your family name, and you have another name too, it… it indicates where you’re from but I don’t remember-” “Eboratum” Florentius whispered before he could help himself. He stared at Isran, frozen in place and unable to believe what was happening. “Eboratum.” Isran exhaled slowly, but it seemed like he could no longer stop. “Your favourite food is medium-rare venison and you were frightened of graveyards as a child. You love autumn because of the changing colours of the leaves and you had to kill your best friend when they were infected with vampirism and tried to infect you. You know how to swim but you don’t like to do it. You used to have long hair that almost reached your elbows, and it always looked so soft I wanted to ask how you looked after it. You come from Venda’s Watch, half a day’s ride south of Bruma, but you studied in Cheydinhal at the Great Chapel there and… and you ran away from Arkay when you were thirteen.”

So I’m a huge fan of the “to be loved is to be known” idea, and I get to really indulge in it here, plus 🥰🥰Florentius and Isran backstory 🥰🥰

💕 what's your favorite part of your writing process?

ooh that’s a tricky one tbh. I think the most satisfying part is honestly when I finish a fic’s first draft?

🔚 have you ever completely changed the direction a piece was going?

Oh i absolutely have 😅 one example that really comes to mind was a fic I wrote many years ago that started out fully meant to be a cozy, comforting, coming-home-to-your-lover sweet fic and then after I wrote the soft intro my brain just went “…but what if that was a dream? And reality was anything but sweet?” And I completely went off into a hurt-no-comfort narrative with another evil plot twist at the end 😈

🔥 what’s something that’s currently going really well?

Honestly there’s a lot going on rn but one positive thing is I finally got confirmation my job will keep me on past Xmas 🎉 which is kind of a double-edged sword bc I’ve already decided I don’t want to stay too much longer but still yay for job security ✨

#fabeong rambles #beloved mutuals

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llyncooljones · 2 years ago

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call me sir - twelve days of rowaelin '22.

ao3 || masterlist || twelve days of rowaelin ‘22 masterlist

prompt: christmas activity gone wrong. series: part two to who is he? word count: 1300 trigger warnings: language, smut, sexting tag list: @live-the-fangirl-life @rowaelinismyotp @fireheartwhitethorn4ever @elentiyawhitethorn @rowanaelinn @autumnbabylon @leiawritesstories @backtobl4ck @letstakethedawn @rowaelinscourt

hi.

this is aelin. galathynius.

from the xmas fair. last week, at the weekend. and you overheard me, and i bumped into you?

Hi.

This is Rowan.

From the Christmas Fair. And I knew it was you, you’re literally the only person I’ve given my number to in the last year. Plus, I don’t know many Aelins. No need for awkward introductions—a pet peeve of mine.

well, good to know you gave me the right number, lol. was kinda worrying abt it. couldn’t believe you’d actually wanna get to know someone who was plotting an entire book to have an excuse to go up to you.

figured you might like brave girls, or some shit.

Not to be crude, but I do believe that openly, and really quite loudly, discussing the frequency and quality of dick you and your friend were getting was quite brave. As was discussing the size of my dick, and my possible friend’s dick sizes.

I don’t know anyone else who’s quite brave enough to do such a thing.

You have that going for yourself.

what i’m hearing is that you do like brave girls.

what does ‘at least you’ve got that going for yourself’ mean? i’ve got tons going for me.

No. I like girls with blonde hair, the most unique eyes I’ve ever had the pleasure of staring into, who come up to my chin. And for the record, you’ve got everything going for yourself. You are singlehandedly just everything.

Don’t go fishing for compliments. I know that you know that you’re fucking gorgeous. Don’t play games with me—I won’t play nice, nor fair.

i’ve come to realise you won't play nice or fair.

i’ve now learnt my lesson, teach.

and thank you for the compliments.

i get off on them.

If I’m going to be your teacher, and I’m going to have to teach you your lesson, you will refer to me as ‘sir’. That is, if you’re game?

I could have sworn it was big men, big hands, and big dicks you got off on. Not compliments. correct me if wrong of course.

maybe you will have to teach me my lesson. sir.

and of fucking course i’m game, didn’t you overhear me saying that i was a spoilt rich girl with a secretly traumatic past. if that means anything, sir, it means i’ve been having teacher x student fantasies since i was fifteen. sir.

i get off on all sorts of things—part of being a spoilt rich girl with a secretly traumatic past. we always have the craziest kinks. compliments and praise because my parents neglected me. similarly, some sort of teacher fetish. big men, big hands, big dicks—because we feel like they can protect us, keep us safe, complete us, which has previously never been felt by us before.

and so many more—you’ve barely scratched the surface, sir.

I can hear your evil laughter, Aelin, and I’ve never heard you laugh.

I’m always up for being your senior-year English teacher, call me Mr Whitethorn.

And trust me, I look forward to diving into the very depths of your sexual deviancy.

mr whitethorn. i like it.

you would’ve been a hit at my high school—so many spoilt rich girls with secretly traumatic pasts.

and, sir, it makes me wet when you use phrases like ‘sexual deviancy’

It gets me fucking rock hard when you call me Sir, or Mr Whitethorn. you have no idea how so.

in that case…

mr whitethorn? what’s today’s lesson on?

I think apt place to begin your education, would be with one’s own pleasure. In my experience, people put so much pressure on the idea of perfection when it comes to sex, and such acts between two people. So much so that the pleasure is slowly stripped away, and replaced with worries that won’t stop, creating a wall between yourself, and your pleasure.

Today, I’m going to focus our lesson on touch yourself, Aelin.

and what are you going to teach me, that i don’t already know? I’m in my twenties, I’ve gone to college, and i’ve been coming by my own fingers since i was fifteen. (clearly there is a correlation between teachers and me coming)

plus, and I mean this with the utmost respect, what are you—a man—going to me—a woman—about my body—a woman’s body—mr whitethorn.

If you want to doubt me, go right ahead, but know Miss Galathynius, it’s not what I can teach you, it’s what I can do to you.

I recall my language making you wet, I can’t teach you that. I can do it to you though, I can make you wet when I use long, sophisticated words, confuse you a little. Make you feel both insecure, and so very, very safe. I can manipulate your body simply with typed words.

You’d do well to remember that.

sir?

mr whitethorn?

excuse me, i’m texting you. where the fuck are you? are you fucking kidding me, right now?

Are you ready to apologise, Miss Galathynius?

for fucking what? get real.

For making assumptions about me. You seem to be under the impression that you can get away with being rude to me. You can’t, I’m unlike any teacher you’ve encountered before.

And you ‘get real’, Miss Galathynius. You can try and convince yourself that you aren’t soaking through your panties, you’re so turned on. But I know you are. You can tell yourself you aren’t going to touch yourself when you set down your phone. But I know you are.

I’ll make a deal with you, Miss Galathynius, if you message me how wet you are, and whether or not your fingers are too, I’ll continue the lesson. We’ll forget all about the fact that you swore at me no less, and that you were insolent and bratty, and you can come as many times as want during this text chain, but not afterwards.

You understand?

yes, sir.

my panties are so wet, my skirt is too.

and my fingers are fucking coated.

Take your panties off.

In fact, Miss Galathynius, get naked. Lock the door. Get comfortable. Tell me, ‘yes, Sir’ when you’re done.

yes, sir.

Put your fingers—the wet ones, before you ask—in your mouth. Fucking suck on them.

Have you got your fingers in your mouth, can you taste yourself? Fucking wish I could taste you.

yes.

what about you, sir?

You can bet your life on the fact that I’m touching myself.

That got you hotter, wetter. More desperate. Want me there, don’t you? I want you here.

im close. keep telling me what ur gonna do

You want to know what I’d do to you if I had you in my bed? I’d strip you, peel away every scrap of clothing you had on, until I could see every inch of your skin, until I can mark out every blemish with bite marks.

I’d bite your nipples, soothe them with my tongue, and then I’d bite them harder. Harder until you’re screaming, and I won’t know if it’s in pain or pleasure. Maybe I’d make them bleed. All depends on whether or not you were a good girl.

It would have got you wet, you’d be dripping all over my sheets. Your cunt would be throbbing it’d be so desperate for me. I’d treat it to a lick, lave my tongue over your clit, edging you towards your orgasm. When you’re right there I’d slide a finger in, tease you from the inside, and give you the best orgasm of your life.

And then I’d do it all over again.

holy fuck. oh fuck, i just came so hard.

fucking what?

i literally messaged you to ask if you wanted to grab a hot chocolate or something or see if you were available for a date or something. pre-dorian’s party.

And instead, you got this, huh? Regretting it, yet?

that was arguably the best orgasm i’ve ever had—and we’re in different postcodes. so, no. and i don’t think i’ll ever regret this.

And I’d love to grab a drink with you.

#twelve days of rowaelin #12 days of rowaelin #rowaelin fic #rowaelin #llyncooljones' writing #my fic #my writing #my smut #tog #tog fic #throne of glass #throne of glass fic #rowan whitethorn #aelin galathynius #wih?#who is he?

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kingsofeverything · 1 year ago

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I’m interested! Can you post The fake relationship for a work party? 🫶

Thank youuu 💛 Yes! This is based on a tumblr post that I can’t find now.

Anyone who reads this, remember it’s unfinished, unedited, etc.

And here’s the list of other WIPs

“Yes. Yes, sir. Sounds great. We’ll see you then,” Louis says, and waits for his boss to hang up first. As soon as he does, Louis slumps in his ergonomically designed desk chair and sighs.

He never meant to lie to his boss. It’s not the sort of thing he normally does. But when he first started the job almost a year before, his boss asked if he had a girlfriend or a boyfriend, and his brain couldn’t keep up with his mouth. He answered as if it was a multiple choice question instead of a yes or no question, accidentally outing himself as well. Thankfully his boss just smiled and nodded and told Louis to bring his boyfriend along to happy hour at the bar around the corner.

That first day, Louis went out after work with his new boss and coworkers like a dutiful employee who desperately wanted to keep his job. It turns out that, for a group of accountants, they’re a rather wild bunch. And at almost twenty-eight years old, with a good bit of bartending through college, Louis is… not so wild.

He had more than his fair share of booze and boys over the last decade or so, but as he’s gotten older, his hangovers have gotten worse, and his tastes have changed. Now he much prefers a glass of wine with dinner (two on weekends), video games or movies on the couch (the ability to pause and go pee is underrated), and a ten o’clock bedtime (midnight on weekends). He does go out occasionally, usually with his best friend and roommate Harry, though with his schedule at the bakery, they tend to stay in more. But Louis hasn’t had time to date, really. Or hasn’t made time. He hasn’t found a guy who can give his comfy couch any competition.

But his boss doesn’t know any of that because Louis had the brilliant idea that first evening out after his first day on the job, to use an imaginary boyfriend as an excuse to leave early. He’s done the same every single night out since. Sometimes he’ll stop in for one drink and make a joke about getting home before his boyfriend goes to bed. But most of the time he successfully uses his imaginary boyfriend’s odd work schedule as a reason to skip out on everything. Even the annual company picnic in the park the previous summer.

When he started the lie, he kept it bland and boring, with no details about his imaginary boyfriend or his job. Less than a month into it, Louis started to elaborate. First, mentioning Harry by name, and then dropping little details into conversations. It was easy when no one knew Harry and Louis knew Harry wouldn’t be stopping by his office or anything like that when it’s way across town from the bakery and their apartment. And it wasn’t as if Harry would care. He’d probably think it was funny. So Louis just kept his little lies to himself, not wanting to burden Harry with keeping an unnecessary secret.

Now he’s backed himself into a corner. Because his boss gave him plenty of notice and has practically begged Louis to bring Harry to the company holiday party.

So he has less than a month to find a new job.

Louis flicks his finger against the clip art of the printed invitation, eyes darting around the office to check that no one is watching him, not that they’d be able to see his text conversation. Still he backs up to the far wall of his cubicle, the one that’s actually a wall and not a partition, and sends a quick message.

Louis: Need a favor

He bites his lip, staring at the screen, but a reply comes almost immediately.

Harry: What

Louis: Come to my company xmas party and pretend to be my boyfriend and I’ll give you $20

Harry: What

Louis: $20 and a $20 Starbucks gift card to pretend to be my boyfriend for one night and not ask why

No dots appear. Louis blinks at his phone, trying to will Harry to agree.

Harry: $20 and a $20 Starbucks card, a foot massage, buy me sushi for dinner, and you have to take the trash out without complaining about it for the next year. And we’re talking about this when you get home tonight. I might need to add to my list of demands.

Louis: Ok

If that’s all Harry asks of him, he’ll gladly give it.

—

“Hello, darling,” Louis says the second he opens the door and sees Harry laying on the couch, wrapped in a blanket. The hood of his sweatshirt is pulled tight around his face so that only his eyes and nose are visible. He looks tired, but comfortable and warm. “That’s my hoodie you’re wearing.”

“Finders keepers.” Harry loosens the strings of his hoodie to uncover his pout, pushing it back off his head. With a quick pat to the couch cushion, he says, “Come sit.”

Kicking off his shoes, Louis drapes his coat over the back of the couch. Harry lifts his head, and Louis sits, waiting for him to lay back down so he can comb his fingers through Harry’s curls.

The weight of Harry’s hand against his shin is warm even through his trousers. Harry reaches down and slips his fingertips under the hem, pushing down Louis’ socks and scratching lightly at the hair on his ankles. He sighs and his breath is hot on Louis’ thigh. “Explain, please.”

Louis starts at the beginning. It’s less embarrassing than he expected it to be. He really thought Harry would give him hell for lying to his boss. But he doesn’t even seem mad that Louis lied to him. He listens quietly to Louis’ explanation, humming and nodding occasionally, rubbing circles over Louis’ ankle, and not speaking until Louis is finished.

“Since you started the job in January?” Harry asks, tapping his fingers against the back of Louis’ calf.

“Yeah.” Louis holds his breath.

“What if you’d like, met someone and wanted to bring them to the party?” Harry glances up at him. “You would’ve just like, imaginarily broken up with me? And I never would’ve known.”

“Suppose so,” Louis says, exhaling and tracing the curve of Harry’s ear with his eyes. “I haven’t been on a date in forever though.”

“True.”

While Louis twirls Harry’s curls around his finger, he thinks back to his last date. It was a few months after they moved into the new apartment, right before he put in his notice at his old job. The guy hadn't been awful or anything, Louis just found himself wondering why he’d bothered leaving the house halfway through dinner. And Harry can’t really say anything when he’s been “quite happily single, thank you very much” for going on two years now.

Finally, Harry says, “I’ll do it.”

“You will?”

“Yeah.” Harry rolls onto his back, looking up and meeting Louis’ eyses. He catches his lower lip between his teeth, studying Louis’ face. “Do you have a plan?” When Louis shakes his head, Harry says, “Okay, so… You haven’t really lied about anything other than like, calling me your boyfriend. I’m not like, pretending to be someone I’m not, so it’ll be easy. I’ll just be me, but like, with hand holding and kissing and stuff.”

“What?” Louis frowns down at him. “Why kissing?”

“Please, Louis. This is an office party. There’s always mistletoe.” Harry rolls his eyes and sits up, hair standing in all directions from Louis’ attention. “I don’t mean, like, making out or whatever you’re thinking. But…” Slowly, Harry leans in, licking his lips and Louis’ eyes track the movement. He glances up holding Harry’s gaze as he presses a slow, gentle kiss to his parted lips.

Instantly, Louis’ face heats. “What… Why’d you do that?”

Harry snorts. “The party’s tomorrow and we’re supposed to have been dating for more than a year, Louis. You can’t blush and stutter if I peck you on the lips.”

“It’s not… I didn’t…” Louis holds his hands to his cheeks, trying to cool his heated skin.

“I’ll be your fake boyfriend, Lou, but you clearly haven’t thought this through.” Sitting back against the armrest, Harry takes a breath and blows it out, puffing his cheeks. “We have to like, practice kissing under the mistletoe.”

Narrowing his eyes, Louis lowers his hands, though his cheeks still feel flushed. “I feel like that’s probably unnecessary.”

“Nope. Totally necessary.” Pushing himself up off the couch, Harry yawns, then says, “I’m exhausted. I’ve got an early morning, and a party to possibly attend.”

“Possibly?” Louis asks.

“Yeah, I mean, like I said, I’ll do it, but not if you’re going to argue with me about the like, logistics.”

“Logistics?”

Harry nods, stretching his arms overhead so that Louis’ hoodie lifts up and Harry’s sweatpants slip down. Louis almost misses Harry’s response, but he leans down and ruffles Louis’ hair, drawing his attention. “I’ll only be your fake date if you make out with me — with tongue — for two whole minutes.”

“What?” Louis jumps up from the couch.

“Two minutes,” Harry says, shuffling off towards the kitchen so that Louis has to follow him. He reaches for the tin of mints he keeps in the junk drawer and pops one into his mouth, holding the container out towards Louis. “Mint?” While Louis takes a mint, Harry pulls out his phone and sets a two minute timer, showing the face of his phone to Louis. He loudly chews his mint, swallows it, and taps the start button on the timer.

That is apparently what Louis needs to convince him that Harry isn’t joking. He hurries to swallow the mint in his mouth, and almost chokes, while Harry lounges against the counter, arms crossed, smirking like he doesn’t think Louis will do it. The timer doesn’t make a sound, but Louis can see it ticking away on the screen of Harry’s phone, and it suddenly feels like now or never.

Reaching out, Louis tugs on the strings of Harry’s hoodie — Louis’ hoodie, but finders keepers, apparently — twisting them around his fingers and pulling Harry down to meet him just as he moves fully into Harry’s space. He steps to either side of Harry’s crossed ankles, and Harry drops his arms, grabbing onto the counter with both hands, fingers curling over the edge. Harry’s eyes flicker down and Louis brings their lips together, releasing his hold on the hoodie to cup Harry’s face with both hands.

Two whole minutes, with tongue, Harry said.

Behind his closed eyelids, Louis rolls his eyes. He tilts his head slightly to the right, stroking his thumb over Harry’s jaw and guiding him to meet him, their lips parting at the same time. Harry hums, pushing off the counter, forcing Louis to take a step backwards. He grips Louis’ hips, steadying him, and Louis grabs hold of his shoulders, still feeling unsteady. Mostly that’s due to Harry’s mouth on his because of course he’s a good kisser. He sucks on Louis lip, one hand pressing into the curve Louis’ lower back, the other creeping towards Louis’ ass, when the alarm on Harry’s phone blares and they both jump backwards.

“That wasn’t totally horrible, was it?” Harry asks, slightly breathless.

Louis shakes his head, because it wasn’t, but also because he’s known Harry for a while and never thought to kiss him before and he doesn’t know why. Definitely not horrible. He reaches for the fridge in search of a distraction and something cold to drink.

“Okay, so, I’m going to bed.” Harry snatches Louis’ water bottle from him and takes a sip before handing it back. “Don’t worry about your boss or whoever. I think we know each other well enough that we won’t have any trouble convincing them we’re together.”

“So you’re in?” Louis asks, taking a step back and gulping his water. He raises his eyebrows and says, “You’re going to make this fake dating au a success?”

“Yeah.” Harry nods, scrunching his nose. He pulls his hood back over his messy curls and says, “I suppose I need to wear a suit.”

Louis shakes his head, pulling Harry’s hoodie strings again, this time so tightly that Harry’s nose is all that’s visible, tapping it lightly with the tip of his finger. “Wear whatever you want. Glitter, lace, a tux, a dress…”

“Okay,” Harry mumbles through the fabric of his sweatshirt and Louis pulls on the hoodsweatshirt until he can see Harry’s face againthe hood falls off. “’Night, Lou.”

“’Night, darling,” Louis says, tucking Harry’s hair behind his ear.

——

Louis spends all day Friday working from home and regretting the past year of his life.

In the late afternoon, Harry comes home with shopping bags, and Louis finds himself grinning at him like a loon. He catches himself mid-sigh, and freezes, eyes going from almost closed the force of his too big smile, to wide open, and jerks his head around to stare back at the television.

“Sorry I’m late,” Harry says, rustling his shopping bags before dropping them onto the couch beside Louis. “Realized I didn’t have anything to wear to an office Christmas party.”

“You don’t have to dress up.” Louis turns and pulls his feet up, watching Harry unwrap his scarf and take off his hat. Combing his fingers through his hair, Harry scratches his scalp, stuffing the beanie into the pocket of his coat.

“Oh, I forgot to tell you!” Harry stops, coat dangling off his arms. He hurriedly joins Louis on the couch, and says, “I meant to text you earlier. I thought about it today and I think I’ll need some time to like, get into character. I meant to give you some warning. Sorry. But, um… I’m officially your fake boyfriend as of right now.”

“Now?” Louis frowns, reaching for one of Harry’s shopping bags, but Harry smacks his hand away. There are still X hours until the party.

“Yes, sir.” Harry nods and winks, which Louis always finds annoyingly endearing, because he’s never sly about it, always obnoxious and over-the-top dramatic, with accompanying sound effects and open mouth. “I need a shower. You coming with me?” Before Louis can register what he said, Harry barks a laugh.

Standing and gathering his bags, he walks around and looks down at Louis from behind the couch. Louis tips his head back, about to ask Harry if he plans on being a pain in the ass as of right now, too, and if that’ll carry on all night at the party, but Harry bends down and kisses him before he can speak. It’s no two minute kitchen make out session with tongue, but it’s unexpected, and somehow, even at an angle, Louis’ barely open mouth lines up perfectly with Harry’s cold, peppermint chapstick flavored lips.

Harry walks away and Louis is left there, the tips of his fingers hovering in the air in front of his mouth. The tingling doesn’t dissipate when he finally touches his lips.

Perhaps a better use of his day would’ve been shopping for himself or even sorting through his own clothes in an effort to find something to wear to the party, rather than simultaneously regretting his life choices and trying to figure out when the hell he developed these feelings for Harry and why he didn’t notice them before.

While Harry showers, Louis rifles through his closet, searching for magically hidden clothing that he’s forgotten owning or buying. All he finds is a black blazer and his fitted black trousers — the ones that he never wears anymore because they’re a bit snug. No one’s looking at his bum when he sits behind a desk all day. His deep red scoop neck t-shirt seems festive enough, but he refuses to do more than put on deodorant and blow dry his wet hair after he showers.

It’s a sort of penance for jacking off to the memory from the kitchen the night before. He had to do it. No question.

Harry seems to be all in with this fake boyfriend thing and Louis is powerless to stop it, which means that if Harry’s as big a proponent of PDA as he suspects, he’s going to spend the duration of the party touching Louis in one way or another. However innocent the intention, Harry’s hand in his all night would still give him a boner eventually. God forbid Louis rest his palm on Harry’s lower back.

So he pregamed it a bit. Tired himself out. That way, Harry can kiss him under as much mistletoe as he likes and no matter how red Louis’ cheeks get, at least he’s less likely to spring an erection in the middle of his office Christmas party.

Louis adjusts his hair in his reflection in the bathroom mirror, flicking it off his forehead. He steps out of the bathroom just as Harry opens his bedroom door and they both stop short as Harry drops his coat.

“Oops,” Harry says, but Louis catches it before it hits the floor.

“Hi.” Louis tries to see as much of Harry as he can in the few seconds he allows himself to look.

“That’s very boyfriendy of you, Louis,” Harry comments as he slips his arms into his waiting coat. Louis brushes the backs of his shoulders, straightening Harry’s coat, though it doesn’t need it.

“I try,” Louis says, wondering if he should behave any differently towards Harry. Maybe he ought to change the way he talks to him or acts in his presence as a boyfriend rather than just Louis. He drums his fingers against his stomach and smooths his brow, unsure what he’d need to do differently.

The walk to the subway is colder than Louis thought it’d be, which is typical of him in any winter weather. Harry’s always telling him he should wear more layers. He keeps his hands in his coat pockets, balling them into fists until Harry tugs on his elbow, pulling his hand free.

Even without gloves, Harry’s hands are warm, or at least warmer than his own. He holds Louis’ hand between both of his as they walk, forcing Louis to stay close by his side until they reach the first step leading them underground. Louis follows, keeping his eyes glued to the back of Harry’s head where the ends of his hair curls over his scarf.

The party is being held at the same bar around the corner from the office where everyone else goes for happy hour. As soon as they walk through the door, Louis takes their coats, and when he turns back around, Harry passes him a beer.

“Introduce me,” Harry mutters, slipping his arm around Louis’ waist, and tucking his hand through the vent in the back of Louis’ blazer so that it rests on Louis’ hip.

Turning at the warmth and weight of Harry’s palm, Louis finds Harry already leaning towards him, making it easy for Louis to mutter, “Mr. Davidson is my boss. He’s at the end of the bar. Blue jacket, glass of whisky?”

Harry nods and smiles and proceeds to charm every person in the room. It’s completely unsurprising, but Louis is annoyed at how well he plays the part.

“So what else is there? Someone has to get drunk and dance on a table.” Harry props his hands on his hips and twists at the waist, looking around the room. His eyes go comically wide and his lips form a perfect O. “Presents, Louis. There are presents over there. Were we supposed to bring something?”

“Don’t worry about it. Didn’t want to bother you, so I picked up another $20 Starbucks card.”

Clearly affronted at the thought, Harry gasps and squeezes Louis’ upper arm. “You know I love gift exchanges.”

“Yeah, but there wasn’t a lot of time. Sorry. I—”

“Next time,” Harry says, frowning at the envelopes (?) when Louis pulls them from his jacket pocket and puts them on the table with the other gifts.

Louis nods and let’s Harry guide him away, hand cupping his elbow. He doesn’t want to get drunk, after all, it’s his office party and his boss is present. Aside from that, he could easily slip and say something that would ruin their story.

“Louis!”

Louis and Harry both turn and Louis smiles at his favorite coworker. “Merry Christmas, Niall!”

“Yeah, yeah,” Niall says, pointing with his beer bottle. “This the famously mysterious Harry?”

Louis rolls his eyes as Niall shakes Harry’s hand. “This is Harry, yes. I wouldn’t say he’s famously mysterious though.”

“Sure. Okay. It’s not as if anyone placed bets as to whether or not he existed.” Niall nods and winks and Louis is pretty certain such bets were placed and he’s curious about who won and who bet which way. He turns to the tall man standing next to him and says, “This is my boyfriend Shawn. Been trying to get you to meet at happy hour, but—”

“Actually, um…” Harry starts, then frowns, scratching at the stubble on his chin. “Shawn and I kind of know each other?”

It’s said like a question and Louis panics at the thought that perhaps Harry and Shawn have slept together at some point over the past year, but Shawn quickly puts that fear to rest. He grins, reaching for Louis’ hand, and says, “I work around the corner from Harry's bakery. Stop in all the time for coffee and too many pastries.”

#unfinished wip #fake relationship au #that's actually what i was going to title the fic lol #tobethemselves #snippet

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advestager · 9 months ago

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hi, which version or versions of the nibelungenlied have you read? are there any you would recommend?

omg, anon, i have no idea what i've done to deserve such a cool question because i've only ever talked about this book in reblog tags, but thank you for giving me a chance to gush about the copy my baba got me for xmas!!!

this edition is (according to what i was told) the first time both the nibelungenlied and the klage have been published in a single book in english, and as a language nerd (as well as one for the material side of literary history) i absolutely loved it. every other page, the footnotes explain not only the translation choices but also the manuscript ones, as there are several fragments with subtle differences (the going theory is that the story was written down by retellers rather than whoever might have been the original author[s], so it's less exact than it might have been with, say, chaucer) and whobrey had to decide which to treat as his 'canonical' version. he occasionally talks about what previous translations have done in contrast and explains why he agrees or disagrees with those choices (and if they match what his own work has gone with), as well, which was an absolute treat. i already had half a mind to go back to studying german when i'm done with italian, but this book definitely bumped it up in my list because i'd like to see (admittedly likely in about ten years, lol) how the english translations differ from whatever version might exist in modern german.

this version also comes with a glossary of locations and characters at the end, though it is spoilery as hell so depending on how much you know of the story sometimes it's better to just stay confused a little while – and, if it makes any difference, it bears saying that other than my background as a dragon age tabletop player (which was the reason baba thought i'd like the story) i'd never had any contact with anything closer to the subject matter of the nibelungenlied than your average silmarillion fan, and i still managed to come out of it having understood it with no problem.

if you do end up reading it, please let me know what you think!!! i need other people to get my extremely loud feelings about this ridiculously melodramatic middle high german soap opera

#joji.txt #anonymous #das nibelungenlied #best question EVER i am seriously not worthy #i wish i knew more about it but i hope this helps all the same!!!#also do forgive me if i talked nonsense at any point bc my research binge when i finished reading it was a few months ago

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actualbird · 1 year ago

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Hello, i can’t stop thinking about all the dangling plot and character threads left by chapter 9, it’s taking up so much brain space man. Reading your thoughts about it has been really fun though so thanks for that!

I personally believe the main story timeline includes all the card stories available at launch (everything pre-qixi) as well as the first two personal story chapters of each guy.

But speaking of separate timelines (the way i see it), i really wonder what chapter 9 would look like in the world where lukerosa are dating. Because the main story cases would probably still occur in the other timelines and the NXX team would still go investigate them.

Like luke would probably be less aggressive and secretive and desperate and sad throughout… But also if the Oedipus here is the same Oedipus from luke’s personal story, then he’s either been caught, or they know his identity (daniel song, i think it was?) and have evidence against him. I feel like SO MUCH would be different.

Also, this verges on headcanon territory, but I like to imagine that in worlds where rosa started openly dating one of them from the 1st anniv, the boys get along slightly better because they’re no longer aggressively competing for her attention. A year should be enough time to move on (i have no idea tbh) but they’d still have a soft spot for her, something like that. So there’s that possibility to consider.

(Please hoyo… let them be friends… let them care for each other and actually like spending time together… i beg. The current relationships are complex and fascinating but I like it so much better when the love interests get along…)

Anyway, thanks for reading through this super long ask, i hope you have a wonderful day!

// spoilers for tot main story 9

hi anon!! hehe im glad my main story 9 ramblings have been enjoyable to read! im tryna calm down on them a bit because i realized i rambled a LOT AJHFSVASOFAL but in my defense….there was just SO much to chew on

as much as i didnt wanna think about timelines since it gives me a headache, i eventually did HAHA and i agree with you!! the first available card stories are also super aligned in to the beginning of main story (ex. in SR Timely Rescue, mc does not yet know that luke is an NSB agent, meaning that SR Timely Rescue must have happened before main story 5)

like in my brain, the now General Timeline Of Things That Possibly Happened In The Main Story Universe Are, In Order:

Main Story 1

Any and all of luke’s cards available at launch

Main Story 2

Any and all of vyn’s cards available at launch

Main Story 3

Any and all of artem’s cards available at launch

Main Story 4

Any and all of marius’ cards available at launch

Possibly all of the boys’ personal story sweet chapters 1-2

Main Story 5.1, 5.2, 5.3

ARTEM’S XMAS PARTYLAND CARD FOR SOME REASON??? (it was vaguely referenced in 6.2 and this never stops haunting me logistically)

Main Story 6.1, 6.2

Main Story 7

Main Story 8

Main Story 9

like, this timeline is the general thing my brain has accepted since it means that at least mc has Gotten To Know the boys more (and all the launch cards go after each boys' respective First main story focus episode because she'd need to be re-introduced/introduced to them first....though after main story 2, the boys' respective launch cards can get more shuffled. since in main story 2 she meets Both vyn and marius, and artem's can also be shuffled around since shes known him for a while already anyway) BUT has not yet started the deeper chain of events that trigger the boys’ respective character arcs (and also their romantic routes). but again this is….very general. very wibbly wobbly timey wimey. after making that chronological list i tried thinking about the event stories and then my brain just exploded so i’ll stop here HAHAKJFSKDJF

the AU of a chapter 9 after luke’s gone through both emotional development and also being less of a sad sack of shit thanks to mc is VERY INTERESTING TO ME. i agree on the pragmatism that the Oedipus investigation would be affected, theyd have people they can already question and leads that they could check through again. and on the emotional side……he’d be less aggressive deffo, but i still think he’d be quite upset and affected by everything. the big thing that interests me with chapter 9 and luke’s character is how his worsening illness changed his behavior so much. he’ll be doing Better having mc as his support and also having learned more honesty and vulnerability, but his progressing illness would still deffo have him on edge because currently....his illness has progressed and worsened Only in main story 9, nowhere else. his personal story sweet chapters dont mention it, his post-anniv cards dont mention it except for in SSR Dream of Benji but we're not shown any symptoms at all, much less new ones.

...man it's kinda sad to think about now honestly because right now, ch9!luke is the one who goes through the more intense version of the nightmare hes always been afraid of. and yet, hes also the only one without the support system and life outlook to help keep him afloat.....

//LOUD SOBBING

aNYHOO, i love ur hc on the boys having a Romantic Feels Armistice. frankly the timeframe of “moving on” varies a LOT, but all the boys care about mc deeply. itd hurt, yeah, but seeing her happy is most important ;w;

which is to say, I WILL NEVER STOP BELIEVING IN NXX INVESTIGATION TEAM DEEP FRIENDSHIP!!!!! NEVER!!!! //HOLDS ONTO THE TEAM GENTLY, PROTECTIVELY!!!! ;^;

#tot spoilers #the event stories are tough cuz...a bUNCH of them also reference the overarching nxx case!!! like SOTT and BTR!!! but wHEN? CAN THEY HAPPEN #and the Actual In-Game passage of time is weird too cuz my god remember how main story 7 happens just HOURS after 6.2??#...i need to stop thinking about this or im gonna pop a blood vessel jkvKJVSJFS #asks #anon

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firespirited · 1 year ago

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Knee is healing ok, minimal bruising as usual because I just don't bruise more than green (even on blood thinners so I get nasty bumps and short of it being my head: not much to show for it). Wounds are still inflamed but that's just the immune system. I've been having to crop out a cut on my finger from photos that's been looking nasty for two weeks. It's just how that works.

R I C E: Rest, ice (heat actually, i don't do well with ice), compression, elevation worked well. There's some fluid but no friction or particularly strong pain when walking. Fluid removal is 'wait and see'.

My shoes have worn frictionless. Shoe shopping is going to be near impossible for multiple tl,dr reasons: catalogue and the small shoe shop in town won't work, I've been dreading this. But I have boots for this winter and hopefully will find a solution before spring. But hey this time last year I was wearing shoes for more than an hour for the first time. 😅😎

I'm really enjoying getting back into Stargate Atlantis: goldilocks brain zone for the moment. I know the day will come when finishing an episode will feel like a cringey chore or periods where I'm not bored per se but not immersed enough to summon the will but it's a great world to fall back to and have as sort of background for crafting with pauses in crafting for important bits.

The vaccine is slowly finishing up after 2 days fever and those ugh aches it's now just an itchy upper arm. I've felt less panicked talking to people, it's not a magic shield of course it's just a tiny thing that makes the world less lethal so yeah that feels massive.

Sis and I found someone had dumped about 60 brand new 9 day candles, we assumed they were survivalist (orange and yellow packaging) or cozy (they're low danger), thought about maybe decorating them and gifting them for xmas before remembering that this is catholic country, those are novena prayer candles and day of the saints was two weeks ago. 💀😬 That would have not been an appropriate gift.

So I got to play around with one: soy wax and the wick, glitter, mika, pastel chalk pigment and some shot glasses. It's low temp so you can use the microwave.

I feel confident I could whip up an emergency dried lavender flowers with essential oil in pale lilac shimmer soy candle in a jam jar if we needed an emergency present this holiday season. Last year got a little complicated because we didn't have the ingredients to do quick candies or baked goods as we don't have sugar in the house.

I'm getting overwhelmed again, need to go through the to do lists and cull what's just not realistic and break down tasks that seem too hard because they're not chopped into easier parts.

Hope everyone is doing ok, sending lots of love. 💜💜💜

#saf #Crafting #Long post #ramblings

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ambiguouswren · 2 years ago

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So I have a lot of feelings about what this New year already has in store for me and I've been trying to figure out somewhere to go to vent this all out and this honestly feels like the safest place right now.

So I have a colleague that from time to time sends me job listings he thinks are relevant to my interest in the world of theatre and prop work because he saw first hand how in my element I was when I worked under him as a fabricator at Ohio Light Opera. And unfortunately most of them have been like...Texas which is a HARD NO from me. But on December 5th he sent me the listing for this prop artisan job in New Jersey. Full Time. Benefits. PTO. And the best pay I've seen for this position to DATE in my hunting. So of course I got super anxious cuz it asked for a cover letter and did nothing about it for nearly two weeks even though I mentioned it to people and thought about it a lot. Then I wrote up my cover letter. Made sure my website and resume were updated and sent it over 2 days before Xmas eve. The woman emailed me back within two hours of sending that email. She said I seemed like a well rounded artisan and she wanted to have a chat with me. It was supposed to be the 28th but she had some issues over the holiday season and we had to reschedule for the 4th at 1pm. And like...while the time to get over my initial bout of imposter syndrome and getting more time to figure out what I will try to say during the interview has been great, it's also been literally one of the only things on my mind since that first email. I want this job you guys. I don't care how hard it would be to uproot my life and move 1100 miles to a northern climate I'm not accustomed to. I want this. This job would allow me to financially afford to live. I could get an apartment (with a co-signer) for myself. I'd be able to pursue my hobbies. I'd be close to NYC which would mean SO MUCH for my cosplay work. It would literally change my life for the better if I can land this job. If I don't....I don't know what I'm going to do. I'm so tired of struggling but I refuse to give up on the career I KNOW is right for me. So if you're reading this any positive energy, praying, manifesting would be SO very much appreciated. I want this win so badly and I will do whatever it takes to get it. I just need them to give me a chance and know I can prove to them that they made the right choice betting on some nonbinary nerd from Florida. (Also this theatre is beautiful. The work they do is so good. Once all this is over, one way or another, I'll share its name.) Here's to hoping. Universe. 2023. Please. I've been working so hard.

#personal #venting #excitement #terrified #i just want it so badly

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britesparc · 5 months ago

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Weekend Top Ten #649

Top Ten Interpretations of Transformers

Do you know what I love? I love Transformers. I always have; there’s very little of my life where I wasn’t enjoying those big ol’ stompy robots in disguise, one way or another. I have a comic dated February 1985, when I was only just three. It’s been there all along, like Agatha Harkness (who, funnily enough, was also in disguise, and also had a bangin’ theme tune).

Anyway, one of the things about Transformers as a franchise is, really, it’s just a bunch of toys. There isn’t that one central storyline the way there broadly is in most other long-running franchises; Star Wars is (basically) all one thing; Marvel and DC comics have (basically) one core comic book storyline as well as all the various spin-offs and adaptations; even stuff like Turtles or My Little Pony, which have also had multiple reboots and varied continuities, seem to keep a lot of the basics, or at least don’t continuously contradict each other. Transformers, though, has so many different interpretations; if you ask something relatively straightforward, such as “how did the war start”, “why do they transform”, or even “where did they come from in the first place”, it’s impossible to give an answer without qualifying that it’s only true for some versions. What’s Vector Sigma versus the Creation Matrix versus the Allspark? Who knows? Who cares?

As it’s the fab bot-and-convention TF Nation this weekend, I thought I’d take a moment to celebrate my favourites of all these random, disparate, contradictory realities; what with Deadpool & Wolverine slicing up audiences like nobody’s business, it feels like a very good time to journey through the multiverse again, this time hopping from one Transformers verse to another like a giant metaphysical frog.

What am I on about?

Basically, this week’s list is me looking back on my favourite versions of Transformers, from comics to TV and (potentially) movies. I’ve not included toylines, as I sort of don’t think that counts really without a storyline behind it; and I would have included games, but I never got on with what I’d say is the really big “games-only” Transformers story, the War for Cybertron games, so that’s out. So: stuff to read and watch, essentially. And there is absolutely no surprise over what looms large in my psyche, like a giant predatory bird.

That’s all there is to it. Do you really want me to say it? Sigh… okay.

Roll out.

IDW Volume 1 (comics, 2005-2018): Of course it’s this. What else could it be? At thirteen years, this is probably the longest-running and most consistent Transformers continuity; it’s also the best, offering everything from bombastic action romps to complex and nuanced character arcs to thought-provoking examinations on the concepts and tropes of the franchise itself. From the slow-burn opening arcs to the tragi-comic odyssey of More Than Meets the Eye, this was long-form storytelling at its most impressive; a masterpiece of comic art. Spawned careers and upturned central tenets of the franchise: Megatron being a good guy in the most recent cartoon would not have happened without these comics; I don’t think we’d be getting Impactor and Xaaron toys without these comics. It’s incredibly good.

Marvel UK (comics, 1985-1990): I’m focusing here on the UK-originated stories, which began with Man of Iron (first issue I ever got!) and arguably ended with the text story Dreadwind’s Xmas. In here you have franchise-defining arcs that really helped establish what Transformers was to a lot of readers; long-form epics such as Target: 2006 and Time Wars that delved into places the US version of the comic couldn’t go. Looking back, the timey-wimey weirdness, high body count, and focus on B-and-C-list characters really helped solidify the things I look for in fiction.

Marvel US (comics, 1984-1991): even outside of the (IMO superior) UK-generated stuff, the “main” comic series still ruled. This is the cornerstone, the foundation myth of the entire franchise; this is where most of us get our bedrock knowledge of what a Transformer is, I’d say. Writer Bob Budiansky did a tremendous job wrangling so many characters for so long; once British writer Simon Furman took over (essentially marrying the UK style to the main US stories), it went full-bore apocalyptic. Timeless stuff.

Transformers: Rescue Bots (TV, 2011-2016): my favourite animated series might seem strange; but I applaud it for stepping outside the box, delivering a show for younger kids focused on new characters and scenarios. And, delightfully, it developed its own mythology and sense of style; the inhabitants of Griffin Rock grew into a large cast of beloved faces in that organic Springfield sort of way; and the core four ‘bots are just all-timers in our house.

The Transformers (TV, 1984-1987): I suppose, really, this is where it all began; the original animated series. For essentially a forty-year-old toy advert, it’s aged pretty well for the most part; some stories are silly, some downright horrendous, but the opening More Than Meets the Eye arc still rocks. The theme tune is iconic. And, of course, this is where we get The Transformers: The Movie; something I’d argue is probably the single most important and formative piece of Transformers fiction. Yes, it’s fun in and of itself, and for its interesting production story; but also it was the seed that bore fruit in so many ways across the franchise for decades to come. Til all are one, indeed.

IDW Volume 2 (comics, 2019-2022): when IDW rebooted their whole universe in 2019, I was a bit nonplussed; you only have to scan your eyes upwards a little bit to see just how much I revered their original incarnation of the franchise. However, writer Brian Ruckley (who seemed to steer most of the story) was able to craft an intriguing and slow-burning plot that showed how various schemes and conspiracies led to the outbreak of war. Sharing DNA with IDW’s first run, I feel it lacked a bit of the heart and the smarts, but it was still a compelling tale.

Transformers: Animated (TV, 2007-2009): another great, fun animated series, and another that sort of reimagined the core of the franchise. Here, a small team of Autobots (with an Optimus who is not the big wise old leader) are, effectively, superheroes, operating on Earth like they’re the Teen Titans or something. A slow arc builds as the war intervenes, but the combination of a new dynamic, funnier and more characterful plots, and especially the kinetic and hard-edged design, makes this a classic.

Transformers: Generation 2 (comics, 1993-1994): it took me a while to warm up to this; like when the first IDW continuity ended, I was so wedded to the original Marvel run that this odd and edgy sequel felt out of place. It wasn’t my Transformers, so I didn’t read it at the time. Now, though, I can look back at it fondly as a timely curio; a gruff, bombastic, violent ode to nineties excess, like a parody of an Image Comics version of the franchise. Explosive and propulsive widescreen entertainment, with some great art.

Dreamwave (comics, 2002-2004): they get a lot of stick, quite rightly, for the way the company was run; and also, to be honest, for the quality of some of their early miniseries. But they really did pull it together; the art improved, the spin-off series were gold (The War Within!), and by the time the ongoing was unjustly cancelled (coz the company ran out of money, basically), it looked like it was going to some good and very interesting places. And really, nothing can compare to the thrill I had of seeing that preview issue in a comic book window at university; here was Transformers, looking like my Transformers, back again.

Live-action universe (movies, from 2007): there was a lot of jostling for the tenth spot here; the new comics continuity, from Skybound, is good but I’m still warming up to it; and the animated EarthSpark has some great concepts and designs but I’ve not really seen enough of it yet. So I’m going with the live-action continuity, and quite frankly even I’m shocked. Because what we’ve got here are a series of films that are, for the most part, frankly terrible. But. But! The first Transformers (2007) and last year’s Rise of the Beasts are both good fun; explosive, busy films, maybe too long, but still enjoyable and recognisably Transformers. However, I’ll be honest: this is here entirely because of Bumblebee. I wanted to put that one film on its own but felt it wasn’t fair. Perfectly distilling what made Transformers special, the story of one-girl-and-her-car is poignantly, brilliantly old; it’s essentially E.T. with a giant robot Volkswagen. So watch that, it’s great; and if you enjoy it, watch those other two. Skip the rest, though. They’re shite.

So there we are. I kinda wish I’d managed to watch more than the first few eps of EarthSpark; but to be honest I’ve bust a gut to include Bumblebee, because I genuinely think it’s the best non-comics piece of Transformers media ever produced, so even though it’s part of a stable of films I generally do not like, here it is, propping up the list.

Anyway, hope everyone has a good time at TFN this weekend. And, of course, happy fortieth birthday to Transformers as a whole! And here’s to the next forty. Because, after all… it never ends!

#top ten #comics #cartoons #films #transformers #toys #hasbro #tfnation #tfn

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senseirory · 6 months ago

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4th Dan black Belt Test!

Exciting news! I've just embarked on my 4th Dan Black Belt Test, the most challenging test yet. Traditionally, my black belt tests followed a set pattern: pass a pre-test, complete a workbook in three months (with differing challenges in the workbook each time), and showcase my skills on the final test day. This time, it's a year-long test with a list of tasks that I can organize and complete at my own pace as long as they're accomplished to the standards of my Instructor Master Alex Evers. I've included a list of the requirements I must accomplish to pass and receive my 4th degree (or Yodan if we're being super traditional). I will be doing my best to update at least once a week to let you all know how my progress is going!

Read the book "SAVOR" -Eat Mindfully

Organize Top 10 eating related Self-Defenses

Complete 900 rounds of Sparring (I've divided this evenly between standing sparring, Judo/Takedown sparring, Jiu-Jitsu sparring and Heavy Sparring)

Complete 100 rounds of blindfolded rolling (Jiu-Jitsu Sparring)

Help 5 people in my sphere of influence reach their goals

Do 3-5 show-offs to demonstrate on the day I receive my 4th dan black belt. Currently my plan is to do a super traditional Japanese or Okinawan karate form, a super modern XMA form and a break (Baseball bat or concrete)

Inform my students and those around me about my test (Hence the tumblr account)

Participate in 2 tournaments I've never done before and log my experience

Enroll in Martial Arts classes other then karate (Continuing my BJJ practice)

Go through the Satori Alliance Instructor program and document what I learned, liked, and disliked.

Have one of my students achieve the rank of Brown Belt

Be able to do the Full Middle Splits

Lose about 10 pounds (Personal goal that became part of the test)

Organize a community event where we do a cleanup event

Lower my screen time

Have a consistent sleep schedule waking up at 8:30AM everyday

Spend 24 hours camping solo without my phone

I've create my own workbook so to speak to log the progress I make and I'll be using it to share my progress as well.

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sweetsweetazzy · 1 year ago

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Giving Gifts to Furina

Furina is an absolute joy during the holidays, though she is also more demanding than usual. She always tells me what she wants and gives me list and demands I buy everything for her and wrap it all without her knowing. I think she likes the element of surprise, but she needs to be in control of that surprise for it to be enjoyable. Honestly, same, I get it, so I go along with it. At least I don't have to stress over what to get her each holiday.

This year, she requested an abundant variety of sweet pastries and cakes. I haven't the faintest clue when she plans to eat it all, but her wish is my command when it comes to xmas shopping so I got everything. She also asked for a new outfit (custom made, and the funds came out of my pocket), some jewelry, and some strange fontainian game I've never seen or heard of before. It came in a minimally labelled box and I had to hope it was the right thing.

She was delighted to open her presents, which I wrapped with blue, silver, and gold as per her request. I got so many kisses from her that day, you'd think she didn't tell me exactly what to do. It was worth it though, she really was happy!

Despite giving me a gift each year, she always rejects any list I make for her. She says she wants it to truly be a surprise and she knows me so well that she doesn't need a list...which is true, usually. This year, she got me some cute hand warmers, a hard cover journal with some writing I couldn't understand on the front, and a tea party with her (so that's where the sweets ended up!) It was a fun day for the both of us, and I'm glad I got to enjoy it with her.

#f/o #f/o community #f/o christmas #☆fromhell #☆lovelove #☆furina #☆celebrate

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theselfdoubtdiaries · 1 year ago

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Dear Zoe, I think my blog post is overdue? Anyway, here I am now getting my act together after feeling quite scatty for a couple of weeks. Life gets in the way doesn’t it? That’s why people go on residencies of course! This has been literally hitting me in the face these past weeks as I go back to just juggling everyday life, teaching , trying to keep on top of things around the house and garden and dealing with family emotions and issues…..Where does the studio fit into all this? That’s just it – It always seems to come last – well today finally I have /am prioritising my studio practise!! (well to be honest I have done a few other domestic things too – but I have the kiln going and I am sitting down to attend to a list of things which – whilst they are computer things – also need to happen!)

One of the things I’ve been meaning and wanting to do since getting home from Europe – is to process the lumen prints I did whilst on residency. I rediscovered this process whilst I was at CRETA and it’s so much fun – a little bit addictive! I have finally scanned a bunch of lumens and edited them- just playing around with colours mainly and saturation - here's a few. Fun!

Maybe these will become new works? Who knows? The point is to keep playing and experimenting right? Also revisiting my notes to see what other methods there are for fixing the images as I remember there are other experimental options so I'm gonna try this out too now that they've been documented - the originals can change into something else - I don't mind....

In the background I have been angsting a bit about our upcoming show at Belconnen in February…..I guess it’s precisely because we are working and making in unknown territory that it’s a little bit daunting! Still visiting your studio in Sydney last week was good and I feel that we made headway. The road ahead is still a bit foggy but I can sort of make out where we are going (how’s that for a metaphor!)

Anyway, I am so glad that you will be in Canberra over Xmas and that we can put in some quality collab time in the studio working and making and just putting this show together! It will be an intense couple of weeks but I think it will be good.

So once again: trust the process.

PS that quote from Louise Bourgeois that you mentioned about architecture and memories – I knew I’d read it before – I came across a photo from an exhibition I visited the Gallery of NSW earlier this year - it was all about the idea of home – and I really liked it. There were quotes and poems displayed with the works – one of them was that exact same quote. It resonated with me too….and I just love the idea of memories building up in layers like bricks….creating architecture….reminds me of another book called “The Memory Palace” which I need to revisit.

It’s amazing how in-sync we are with our practices…...

#selfdoubt #creative process #art practice #artlife #newwork #studiolife

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limoteethw · 1 year ago

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Chickens make me happy people well that’s why I have chickens shirt

1940s. I remember the toys that were featured in the movie, such as specifically the train and the BB guns. The movie really captured the magic of Christmas back then for me without becoming sappy about it. Most other Christmas movies don’t have that connection, so I can’t really relate to them, and they don’t really do that much for me. I think that’s what makes it so popular, at least for people of my generation born from about the mid-1940s until the mid-1950s. I was born in 1952. I remember pining for some big Christmas present every year. Santa usually brought the really good stuff. The biggest Santa gift I ever received was a Lionel HO Texas Special train set about 1958 or 1959.

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As someone who usually doesn’t get gifts and has a hard time getting and Bilal Coulibaly Washington Font Shirt receiving them and finding what I want, it helps when there’s is secret santa stuff. So I helped out by participating and got picked to give a gift to this nice girl I knew. On the day of gift giving, as it was a surprise, I tapped her on the shoulder as she turned around, putting the gift in her hand in a smooth motion. It was one of the things on her wish list. Stunned in a good way, she said “thank you!” After saying my name. A minute later, a person I didn’t know as well, gave me a gift. I’ve never really celebrated it outside my family, and didn’t think I would get one. It was neat, and a very nice surprise, as we didn’t associate much with each other. I thanked her, and then again more than twenty minutes later as class ended. But the kicker: it was lunch time, and I was going to the bathroom, as per usual. Then this other person I know, a lot better, and am better pals with but don’t always get to hang out, but find much in co

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Home Page:Teeclover

mmon, called me over. I waited patiently to see what it was all about. We never really hung out at lunch, and last time she had asked me a question, so I had answered her. Our relationship wasn’t bad.

Home Page:Teeclover

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