07.01.2024
Published two research posts, one on the inspiration behind Altaluna and Valeriano's relationship (the mythological relationship between Zeus and Metis) and another on the inspiration behind Cucufate's fox form (also related to Metis and, therefore, to Altaluna).
The latter post marks a drastic change in Cucufate's original design; once a monkey, he's now a fox-like creature to better fit the novel's central themes.
Worked on the current draft of Altaluna's Character Profile.
Worked on three major plot points: the moment Valeriano's nephew, Lazaro, confronts him with an ugly truth; the moment Valeriano exiles Lazaro for his impertinence and what this entails for the broader plot; the moment Valeriano confronts his great-niece, Altaluna, with an ugly truth.
Worked on the current draft of The Setting post.
Answered two asks: here and here.
Welcomed a new friend to ✦The Sorcerer's Apprentice's✦ tag list here!
REMINDERS FOR NEXT WEEK:
Answer pending asks.
Publish Altaluna's Character Profile. Decide whether she should have moonstone-coloured hair or black hair. Maybe make a poll about it?
Further work on plot points. Hopefully, settle the three I was working on this week.
Decide once and for all whether the story is set in a Paramo or a Cloud Forest and publish the Setting post. Again, maybe worth making a poll?
TAG LIST: (ask to be + or - ) @the-finch-address @violetboy @fearofahumanplanet @winterninja-fr @avrablake @outpost51 @d3mon-ology @hippiewrites @threeking @lexiklecksi
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Weekly Writing Report - May 26, 2023
Okay, so I missed last week entirely.
Work’s been… hectic and draining thanks to the quinquennial. Last week, I was just completely fried by Friday thanks to work thanks, again, to the quinquennial. So progress? What’s that?
But I’ve had two weeks to think about something I mentioned.
In between the Prozac and Venlafaxine, I started asking questions about things I did or happened in my life. And that, perhaps, things that happened when I was 16 were actually deeply fucked up and that I shouldn’t have ever been in that situation. But I wasn’t the adult in that situation so…
But those are the types of introspective roads I’ve been going through the last almost two months.
And one is, “What kind of story do I want to tell?”
The nice thing about fanfiction is it’s pretty easy to answer that question. I don’t really have to spend any time thinking about it. My fics tend to focus on grief and growth, and how to learn to live with it.
But nothing exists in a vacuum and, no doubt, if I spent enough time analyzing my own fics I could probably figure out what cultural templates I’m drawing from and being influenced by as I write.
But I tend not to have an agenda other than Clare x Jean in my canon.
With the Transhumanism story, because I try to put myself square into the field of science-fiction, I do have an agenda. It’s possible to write science-fiction without an agenda. I just don’t think I’m capable of that.
But then, what is my agenda? What is my point?
And I’m faced with the issue I have faced since grad school. If it isn’t clear by now, I tend to fall into the Marxist-Leninist ideology broadly. And where the theory of communism is great in diagnosing the problems of capitalism and the contradictions within the system, it completely fails in defining any sort of solution in any specific sense, nevermind that the process of capitalism society to social vanguard state to the state “withering away” and we achieve true communism is… uh… yeah.
And this has always put me at odds with my friends who are within the same general umbrella, though one will specify he examines things through class analysis as opposed to calling himself a Marxist-Leninist and the other is a straight-up Stalinist tankie.
And my students would usually end up shocked that after we’d have a discussion on communism theory that I’d then go off 50 minutes (length of section) about every which way the “revolution” has failed and how the US won the Cold War by being aided by the fact China and the USSR were basically in their own little Cold War throughout much of the 1960s (this is how Nixon was able to go to China).
We’d leave them a little hope, though. The instructor would usually screen the documentary, The Take, which is about the recovered-factories movement in Argentina. To this day, I’m still surprised the movement is still around.
But is hope something I really want to portray?
And this leaves me wondering what kind of story I really want to tell. Now, the answer to that is your story does not have to be a true and accurate reflection of what you actually believe. That’s a bit harder in science fiction, I feel, because science fiction has generally been the domain of what we fear in society now.
And while I can get to the end point, I think of the transhumanism pitch. How I end it… if I end it with the absolute end of humanity, that reflects my general belief that we’re too far gone in Western society to actually make any meaningful change that will lead to the survival of it and that any attempt otherwise will reproduce the same thing. If I end it with a technological reset and send society back into the stone age, I think development would follow much the same way and we’d be in the same exact position as we are now.
I think I understand now why so many authors tend to have meso-level solutions to their stories, which used to annoy me. “We can’t save the world and we’re not trying to. We’re just trying to save ourselves. We did it and we’re outta here.” And while some authors can absolutely do that well, I don’t think I can nor do I want to. But then what is my grand solution? If I leave it on some hope that there even is some kind of grand solution.
And I’m certainly not saying there’s any kind of hope of a utopian future. That’s just a bullshit narrative. Every form of society will have issues, contradictions, and dysfunctions. You just got to figure out what ones you’re willing to live and deal with.
“Oh, but you’re just a prophet of disaster who says this ship is lost…”
Maybe, but even when my teaching mentor emails me and says, “You might have been more right than I ever really wanted to believe,” you know shit’s fucked.
“Only you can tell your story,” as Seanan says.
But what kind of story do I want to tell? Perhaps, I should just focus on what story will actually fucking sell versus my belief that we’re doomed as a species.
But here’s the thing: It’s easy to interpret this as life is meaningless. And I believe there is no inherent meaning to life and existence. But not in the edge-lord way of “life is meaningless.” Sure, life is meaningless. Create your own damn meaning.
The Vampire Story is, very oddly, hopeful. I know the ending and I ended it on a hopeful note that we can evolve to something better. I’m not sure I really believe that anymore either. But I was 16 when I put the initial ideas down and I’ve changed so much of the story since then.
I think this is why I liked Frank Herbert so much. He did give us a grand solution in the Dune Chronicles. Do I agree with all his philosophy? No. But I can appreciate that he had a point (several) and went with it.
So, this rambling mess has been on my mind the last two weeks as I watch the world burn around me.
I have a three-day weekend coming up so I’m hoping I can workup enough mental energy to actually write and continue on with these YouTube videos as I try to learn something new.
So ends this week’s report.
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Weekly Update: 5/1/23 - 5/6/23
Entertainment/Art Progress:
Man, I really do believe my work speed doubled, at least, when it came to my new tablet. I dunno if it's the bigger touch screen or the ability to use my computer's mouse, but something seems to be making my work on it more progressive and easier.
Speaking of, I'm nearing the outlining (and possible end) of the "Chapter 1" image for Getting Your Goat. I mean, it'd feel too disorganized to not have that matter of "divider" between comic sections/chapters, ja? Plus, it makes it feel more like a real comic, when it's finally all together. However, I'm feeling the urge to sketch traditionally, rather than outline on the tablet and digitally. I dunno what it is, but I feel easily peeved off with sketching on the tablet... Yet, coloring and outlining? I feel right and happy as rain.
I'm also doing another "writing practice" to help further ease any tedium of drawing and fully original writing, so keep your eyes peeled for more "fanfiction," per se. Hey, just a little something to tide me over, while I excitedly await Peach Creek to finally make its official debut. I've kinda fallen out of using NovelAi for assistance, during "dry spells" and all that with writing... Eh, why pay for the privilege when you can come up with an idea of what to do next, for free, if you're willing to be patient? Also, be prepared for a majority of Ed Edd n' Eddy themed ones, in that regard; but allow me to warn you right now, the canon characters they'd focus mostly on are Sarah and Jimmy, and follow a 2nd person narration of you being an alternate version of Claire that joins them in either simple antics or learning self-improvement. Sure, it involves everyone else, too; but if not something you'd read for fun, I'd say read it to critique and tell me how to do better, so my original works can benefit from that improved sense of quality.
Personal Life:
Well, I've gotten back into Animal Crossing: New Horizons, and it's certainly a nice experience to relive. I recall abandoning it for a couple years, but I've decided on resuming that matter of escapism. I mean, it doesn't take up too much time, you can play at your own leisure... It's a nice little matter of relaxation, when you just want a small break from things and also don't want to get sucked into playing for longer than intended, having to "complete missions" and all that.
I've also gotten my mother into Invader Zim, and it's nice when your parent can share fondness for a beloved cartoon series. She really seemed to enjoy the Gir shirt I got her for Mother's Day: it uses Gir to convey different emotions, with them listed under each picture.
I'm hoping that dedicating each weekday to a certain muscle group, instead of working them all on both days of the weekend, will not only help me better build them up and tone them, but also allow for more time on weekends to further speed up creative work progress.
Misc.:
Since my tablet functions as a replacement monitor (I can only use my traditional monitor or tablet to display things), I've also taken to using it as a new "game device" with my Steam list. I feel like I do better in the likes of Pizza Tower and all that, with the closer screen and tilted angle. So, yeah, that's a pleasant, yet admittedly "unorthodox," use for a tablet screen!
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