#we've tried going high when they went low (nod to real life on that) and it landed us right here in the drink so...

[invinciblerodent]

making the decision on who to back for Archon is...

ngl, it feels a little different now, from the way they perhaps intended when they were writing that quest

[neptunetheplanet7]

𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐢𝐯𝐞 - 𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞𝐬

DM ME IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO BE PUT ON THE TAGLIST!!

;mikasa ackerman x fem!lesbian!reader

;modern au, band au

word count: 2.0k

warnings: swearing, fluff if you squint, deep talk with jean

listen to the music masterlist

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Hitch dropped you off at home with a loud "Au revoir!" and sped off in her black car while you waved silently.

You couldn't shake the nervous feeling Hitch had left you with. It was reasonable to feel uneasy after a strange encounter like that, but nevertheless, you plastered on a fake smile when you walked inside and saw Eren sprawled on the couch.

He lifted his head from his phone when he noticed your presence. "Y/n, you're back. What did Hitch want?"

Admittedly, you felt bad about never telling your best friend, but it was too late now.

"Nothing much, she just wanted to catch up. Haven't seen her since college," You lied easily as you plopped down in the chair next to the couch. "What's new with you?"

Eren shrugged and looked at his phone. "Just trying to pass the time. Jean's headed to the airport at eight tonight. Hope you're ready to see your girlfriend." He tilted his head back while laughing.

You smacked his forehead and he recoiled in pain. "Ah! What's your problem?" Eren rubbed his forehead with a hard glare aimed at you.

"I don't have a problem, you're just being freakish."

Eren gawked. "No, I'm not! You're the real freak, being you and whatever."

"Oh, good one." You snorted. "Hey, speaking of, where is Jean, anyways?" You furrowed your eyebrows as you glanced around the house.

"You tell me." Eren repeatedly clicked his tongue while turning his attention back on his phone.

"I'll go find him then," you decided. Eren just grunted in response, too immersed with the JAEGER BOMB fan pages he was scrolling through.

You got up from the comfy chair and starting looking around the house for Jean. After your talk with Hitch, you were feeling even more nervous about Mikasa coming home. You desperately needed to talk to someone, even if it wasn't about Hitch. You just needed a good distraction from tonight.

Jean was nowhere to be found on the first floor, so you trudged upstairs in hopes of finding him. You rounded the corner at the top of the stairs, passing Mikasa's dark room, stopping when you heard a quiet string of curses from the hallway bathroom.

"Jean?" You called out hesitantly. Lightly knocking on the bathroom door, you pressed your ear to the wood in hopes of figuring out what the issue was.

"Come in," came Jean's strained voice from the small room. You peeked your head in the doorframe and took note of his frustrated figure.

"What's going on?"

"Who decided it would be a good idea to grow my hair out?" He made furious hand motions at his head.

You let out a chuckle as he angrily tried to comb his hair back. "You did."

He rolled his eyes. "Right. I think I might have to go back in time and slap myself for that one."

Shrugging, you sat on the counter next to the agitated male and crossed your arms. "Just cut it then."

"It's not as simple as that," he sighed. "I like the way it looks long, Marco likes it too. And the fans, you know. Besides, I can't cut it in a fit of rage. I'll end up like you." He snorted after his snide comment.

"That was one time! Besides, that was high school. We all did stupid things back then." You grimaced at the memory.

"Yeah, you were the stupidest. You chopped off all your hair because of something that aggravated you." He pointed his comb at you in a teasing manner.

"A little thing called feelings were aggravating me. At least I can control myself more now." You pushed the comb back at him and poked his shoulder.

"Speaking of which, I'm surprised you didn't lose your shit when I told you guys Mikasa was coming home." He went back to working on his hair.

"Seriously? I made you all clean the whole house. I could barely get through her room yesterday. Wasn't that enough of a reaction?" Your head fell onto the mirror against your back while you laughed bitterly.

"Yeah, I guess it was. I don't know what I expected honestly. I assume you aren't over her?"

"Definitely not." You sighed. "Because it's been two years since I last had any contact with her, you'd honestly think I would've moved on by now."

Jean set his comb at the side of the counter and faced you. "Did you want to move on?"

You fidgeted and looked away from his hard gaze. "It would be best if I did. I had my chance and I never took it. There was always a part of me that knew she'd come back. I had always hoped that she would, I never got to tell her how I felt, but now that it's actually happening it feels almost unreal." You met Jean's eyes and the corners of his mouth twitched up.

"Are you going to confess when she's back?" he inquired.

Your thoughts circled back to Hitch. Her threats were powerful. She knew what she was doing. Maybe you could confess to Mikasa in secret and she would never know. However, she somehow knew about Mikasa's future arrival, so you should play it safe. Plus, you hadn't seen the Mikasa you knew in two years.

"No, I don't think I will. There's so much to know about her now. She could be a completely different person." You pulled your knees to your chest.

Jean put his hands on your shoulders which made you look back up at him. "Y/n, you've been putting this off far too long. She's proven to us that she's not always going to be here. If there's ever a time to tell her, it would be now."

You stared at each other for a few moments before you pursed your lips and looked away. Jean was right. The perfect chance was right in front of you but just out of your reach. There was always an unspoken obstacle when it came to your feelings for Mikasa. Whether it was another person or yourself blocking the way. "I just need some time to think."

Jean took his hands off your shoulders and shook his head. "You, my friend, are what people call hopeless." He picked up the comb again, about to run it through his hair once more, but sighed and placed it in a drawer. "Fuck it, ponytail it is." You found it funny how often he would end up tying his hair in a low ponytail. His hair was long, but it wasn't close to the length Eren's was. Whenever Jean did his hair like that little tufts would stick out at the top of his neck and loose strands would curl around his ears.

"How long are you growing it?" You asked as you let your legs dangle over the countertop.

"I'll grow it until it becomes seriously unmanageable. It's already getting unruly." Jean softly kicked open the door and gestured to the hallway. "After you."

You hopped off the counter and gladly took his offer, sliding your arm along the balcony railing before folding your arms over the wood and resting your head on them. The hallway was only lit up by the orange light from the sunset beyond the large living room windows above the glass doors.

Jean passed by you swiftly, making cool air hit your neck. He loudly trudged down the wooden stairs and you saw him walk into the living room from your view.

Armin was sitting cross legged in the cushy rocking chair and Eren was still taking up the space of the long couch. Their eyes were trained on an ocean documentary, Armin occasionally commenting on the sea life while Eren nodded at him.

Jean sat on the loveseat under the balcony, now hidden from your view. Armin noticed your content gaze and beckoned for you to join them.

You followed Jean's path to the living room and put your hands on the back of the couch he was sitting on.

"What do you guys want for dinner? It's nearly seven o'clock." You asked the seated boys.

"Can we just get Burger King or something again?" Eren tore his eyes away from the screen to look at you pleadingly.

"Eren, we had that yesterday. I don't want it two nights in a row. That's just gross." Armin frowned at his request.

Jean placed his hands behind his head and on top of your hands. "Eat whatever you like. I have to drive to the airport soon." He patted your hands and stood from the couch.

Once Jean left the room you continued your survey. "We could have spaghetti?" You offered.

"That sounds good. I'll help you." Armin started toward the kitchen with you before tugging on Eren's sleeve. "You come too. You've been sitting on that couch all day, you lazy bum."

Eren groaned like a child being asked to do the dishes. "Fine, if I have to."

The three of you started preparing the meal in the kitchen with Armin getting the noodles out and making the meatballs, you making the sauce, and Eren filling the pot with water then leaving the rest to you and Armin.

Eren sat on a kitchen stool and pulled his phone out. You and Armin both gave him an eye roll before continuing your cooking.

It was around seven-thirty when the food was done. There were a few mishaps along the way since Jean wasn't around to help and neither you or Armin were very skilled in culinary practices. But the final product looked edible and that's all that matters.

Eren and Armin got their servings and sat down on the kitchen island stools while you went to close the curtains in living room and the dining area. You then pulled out a stool next to Armin.

The three of you ate in silence for a while before you spoke up. "Jean should be back soon."

Eren perked his head up. "Really? He said he'd get her at eight. He left an hour ago but we all know he likes to be early so who knows," He said.

"I'd give it maybe twenty minutes. Why? You nervous?" Armin twirled the pasta around their fork.

"Incredibly," you exhaled.

Eren snorted. "As expected from you. But if you're nervous, imagine how Jean feels right now. That should perk you right up." he laughed to himself while imagining Jean waiting for Mikasa, a nervous wreck.

"Are you not nervous?" You asked timidly.

Armin shrugged. "I guess I am. We've known her forever. It'll be just like seeing an old college friend. It'll be refreshing to see her after all this time. I'm more worried about how ready the house is," they explained while folding their arms.

"I'm a little nervous. You think she'll like my hair?" Eren gestured to his bun.

"No, you're ugly." Armin commented. You laughed so hard at Eren's shocked face that you didn't hear the door unlocking behind you.

Armin stopped laughing with you and stared at the door. "Mikasa," He whispered.

"Mikasa?" You questioned and looked back at the door. "Mikasa."

Sure enough, Mikasa was at the door with Jean lurking behind her.

She was wearing a black hoodie and sweatpants with dark green sneakers. Her hair was cut much shorter now. It was slightly fluffed up and messy from the plane ride. She had a few rings decorating her fingers and a small tattoo on her middle finger on her right hand. In that hand, she carried a navy blue suitcase. In the other, gripped the same scarf Eren gave her years before. She held a tired expression but you thought she looked beautiful as ever.

Your eyes widened and you parted your lips to say something but nothing would come out.  Instead, you opted for a hug. You wrapped your arms around her waist, your head just peeking over her shoulder, earning a surprised noise from her. Her arms made their way around your frame as she held you close.

"Mikasa," you could only manage to squeak out her name.

posted: 8/27/21

neptunetheplanet7© 2021

no reposts, edits, or modification to my work by anyone other than me.

[tinybean23]

Me and Yuu Every Step of the Way

In a world where everyone has some sexual attraction Azumane Asahi has always thought of himself as asexual, and those feelings only strengthening when he got together with his crush Nishinoya Yuu. However after a while Asahi starts feeling odd around Noya, and after a study night leaves him questioning if he truly is ace.

Originally posted on Ao3 I figured I could post this piece I wrote here as well! If youd rather read it there heres a link to it.

Without further ado I hope you enjoy this fanfic, and if you could share your thoughts it's be greatly appreciated!

Chapter 1: I Don't Know What to Do

I never thought these feelings were possible... Ashai sighed as he tried to focus on the words of his professor. He began to fidget as he recounted last night's events. Nishinoya had come over for help with his work as he didn’t feel like putting up with Ennoshita’s tutoring. Things had been going smoothly until Noya decided he was bored and would rather do something else than his work. He had crawled onto Ashai’s lap with a smirk silencing any attempts of protest with a peck on the lips. 

 

“Cmon Asahi, we've studied long enough right? Can’t we take a short break?” Noya whispered wrapping his hands around Asahi’s neck.

 

“Yuu...You came here to study...We need to-” if Asahi really had wanted to, he could easily push him away, and Noya in turn wouldn’t push further.

 

“Please Azumane?” He gave his best pleading eyes, planting another peck on his lips making Asahi’s head all fuzzy.

 

“What am I going to do with you?” Asahi sighed fondly, wrapping his arms around Noya’s waist.

 

“Make out with me obviously!” Nishinoya laughed before crashing his lips onto his own.

 

That’s when it happened. He could feel something settle into the pit of his stomach as heat began to spread like wildfire. The kisses between them growing more intense as his mind began to cloud over with an foriegn feeling. He and Noya had made out plenty of times, but now he could feel his blood rushing and desperate feelings to bring their bodies closer. He could feel every sigh of content, something rising inside of him threatening to burst. Noya broke the kiss with a yelp as Asahi’s eyes fluttered open realizing his hands were traveling a little too south on his back. Realizing what he’d done he slid Noya off his lap and got down on his knees face red with embarrassment. 

 

“I am so sorry Nishinoya I have no idea what came over me!” He had his face to the floor refusing to look at Noya for fear that he made him uncomfortable.

 

“It’s alright Asahi! I didn’t mind at all, I liked the way your hands wandered.” Reaching out to lift his face from the floor, he cocked his head “I thought you weren’t into that kind of stuff.”

 

“I’m not!”

 

“There’s no need to be embarrassed Azumane, it's normal to feel this way~” Noya laughed as Asahi hid his face. Shifting, Noya spoke in an usually serious tone “I’m just teasing, you know that right? I know you’re asexual, we talked about this before we got together. I hope I wasn’t pressuring you with my advances, I told you that all you need to say is no.” 

 

“Never Yuu” He bent down to intertwine their fingers, “that was all me, I just don’t know what came over me. I never had those feelings before...would it be alright if we went back to studying? I don’t think I can handle continuing” 

 

“Don’t apologize for that Azumane! How many times do I have to tell you that I understand you have different feelings.” He could feel Noya plant a kiss on his knuckles  “All you need to do is say no okay? Let's get back into this torture” He picked up the pencil and began to write down again.

 

“Thanks Yuu…” Asahi smiled but still felt confused as to the high he had just experienced, attempting to shake off the feeling.

 

Which leads to the predicament he was feeling, he couldn’t get last night's events out of his head. The way Yuu fit perfectly in his lap, the way Yuu’s lips felt against his own, the way Yuu’s voice sighed against his lips, and Yuu. Yuu. Yuu. Yuu infected his mind and allowed no room for anything else. Running his hands through his messy hair he felt that same fire spread over his body, the sensations rising out of him and any hope of being able to concentrate on the lesson long gone. He felt his chest become tight and breathing impossible as he recalled how wonderful Yuu felt last night. I don’t understand, I thought I was Asexual my whole life, I’ve never felt like this for anyone…not even Yuu when we first began to date. Am I just hungry? I need to talk to someone about this...Letting out a sigh he busied himself with drawing in his notebook knowing he wouldn’t be able to do much else. I’ll ask Sugawara for the notes...oh, maybe I can talk to him about my issue. There isn’t anyone else besides him, Daichi, and Noya I’d feel comfortable discussing this about. Waiting anxiously for class to be over he could feel the heat be replaced with occasional chills down his spine.

Minutes felt like hours as the bell had finally rung signaling the end of the period as the professor dismissed them. Approaching Sugawara he could feel the drumming in his ears, sweaty palms, and anxiety spiking into his chest. This is a bad idea. Maybe I’m just overreacting and I’m not feeling what I think I’m feeling. Yeah, I was probably a little too obsessed about Yuu, I do adore everything about him. I’m just confusing my feelings, maybe I’m touched starved? I am overreacting. I should just keep it to myself... Fortunately or unfortunately Sugawara had felt a presence walking towards him and turned to see Asahi fidgeting and looking disheveled. 

 

“Asahi-san?”

 

“Sugawara-san?” His voice cracked, Oh crap he noticed me…

 

“What’s up?” Suga was packing up but faced Asahi to let him know he was listening.

 

“Um...Do...Do you think you can let me borrow your notes? I-I...I wasn’t paying attention”

 

“Of course Asahi” Suga pursed his lips, a knowing look spreading across his face “But I trust you to tell me what's trulygoing on Asahi-san”. He reached for his bag fligning it over his shoulders, “Should I tell Daichi to wait or do you want it to be just us?”

 

“I...do you mind?” He fiddled with his hands attempting to calm himself down

 

“Not at all, whatever it is must be important. Come let’s go to the roof, most students aren’t there” Sending a text to who he presumed to be Daichi they took their lunches and soon found a spot to sit down.

 

Suga pulled out the notes allowing Asahi to begin scribbling down whatever he had missed. 

 

“So Asahi-san”

 

“Uh…yeah Suga-san?”

 

“What’s the real reason you wanted to talk to me?’

 

Asahi choked turning bright red as he frantically tried to erase the line he had made along his notebook. “Suga you can't just say that out of nowhere!”

 

“Whatever it is has you worked up, so what is it? I don’t mean to rush you but we don't have all day and lunch will end soon if you don’t hurry up” Suga reprimanded 

 

“Sorry Suga….it’s just very hard for me to admit it” Scratching his face he attempted to calm his nerves by focusing on the letters he was trying to copy. Suga just hummed in response resting his arms on his legs waiting for him to continue. “I..I told you I was Asexual right?” He felt the anxiety prickling his skin letting out a shaky sigh.

 

“Of course Asahi, and I hope you know the whole team and I support you. You are valid in not feeling any kind of sexual attraction towards anyone” Asahi sighed a little causing Suga to lower his voice “Did someone try to tell you that you can’t be that? I swear…I’ll send Tanaka on them” 

 

“N-NO SUGA!” Asahi shook his head frantically, “It’s not that Suga! Well, I don’t know…”

 

“Asahi-san?” He felt a squeeze on his shoulder, “You can tell me anything I won’t judge, you know that right?” He nodded. “Then?”

 

“I…” Letting out a shaky sigh he hadn’t realized he had been holding looked at the ground. “It’s just that last night me and...I mean Yuu...NOYA and I were making out and I…”

 

“Did Nishinoya pressure you to do something you didn’t want to?” Suga’s voice got dangerously low. “Cause if he did I will- “

 

“NEVER! Nishinoya would never do anything like that!” Asahi quickly shot up attempting to calm Suga from going into Sugamama mode.

 

“Are you sure?” He eyed him suspiciously as Asahi swallowed a lump in his throat.

 

“O-Of course Suga! You know he has been nothing but respectful towards my boundaries, a-and understands what I can and c-cannot do!” 

 

“Alright...then?”

 

“I-...how do you know if…” He could feel his face burning as the feelings came crashing in waves. “Suga...how did you know…” He coughed a little.

 

“Asahi?”

 

“I-...Suga how do you know...what’s it like...to feel unholy?” Asahi was gripping his pants so tightly his knuckles began to turn white. His whole body was on fire and surprised that Suga couldn’t feel the heat radiating off of him.

 

“Feel unholy?” Suga attempted to bite down the laughter “A-Asahi is everything alright?”

 

“Last night!” Asahi began to mumble “Nishinoya and I were making out as usual a-and normally I don’t feel that much of anything. B-but last night I felt...I felt so b-bizarre! I..normally” taking a breath in he continued '' When we make out it’s just kissing and light grinding cause I-I don't mind and it feels pleasant! L-Last night though my h-hands started wandering and my head was a mess! I was...everything felt so right! A-and before I knew it my hand went t-to low on Noya’s back and…” Asahi heard a chuckle escape before tensing up again.

 

“Asahi you know it's okay to feel aroused by the actions of a person right? That doesn’t make you any less valid, as asexual do experience feeling horny. It’s just they are not attracted to anyone in that manner in normal circumstances.” Suga rubbed Asahi’s back attempting to soothe him down. “It’s not like you are looking at Noya everyday and thinking about how you wanna-”

 

“SUGA-SAN!” Asahi buried his face into his hands as Suga let out a light hearted chuckle before returning to a gentle smile. He attempted to calm his racing heart, looking everywhere but Suga. 

 

“Unless...have you started to feel attracted to Noya in that manner?” Looking up he could see Suga’s eyes widen as he cocked his head to the side.”Asahi?”

 

“...” Feeling the flush rush to his cheeks he sighed as he scratched his cheek again.” I...I don’t remember when exactly it started. All I know is I’ve been feeling odd when I see Noya when we change or when he wraps his legs around my waist when he jumps for a hug..I never experienced anything like that before...I don’t know what it feels like except from reading or movies. I never experienced a feeling like that...so….I-I wanna make sure what I think...what I have been feeling is… is that...the unholy!” He could feel breathing become intense as waves of Yuu came into his mind over and over again. The way his eyelashes fluttered shut when he grabbed his hips, the way Yuu would sneak not so hidden heated looks when they changed, the smile he shone when he triumphed, and the way Yuu loved to tangle his fingers into his locks of brown hair when lips refused to part. It was intoxicating in a way that Noya’s lip biting when he’s thinking became too much for the glass hearted man to handle. “I’m so confused! Am I just overreacting Sugawara?”

 

“Asahi breathe. You are getting worked up again.” Reaching for his hand, Suga began to draw circles around his knuckles. “It’s okay, you’re not overreacting despite how you normally are with these...things.” Suga swallowed down and attempted to soothe the gentle giant. “I may not be able to say what this makes you...but in regards to the first question you asked me...Asahi.” Taking both of his hands into his own.”Asahi...if the speech you just gave me and the look you had on while thinking about Noya...Asahi you are feeling...the unholy as you put it.” Squeezing his hands to a breathing rhythm to help Asahi calm further. “It’s okay to feel this way you know?”

 

“What's Noya gonna think?”

 

“Hm?”

 

“How...How will Noya react to this? C-Can I… can I even tell him?” Asahi felt tears well up from an unknown source. “ Will...will he be mad? I...I technically lied to him I-”

 

“You didn’t!” Suga quickly pulled him in for a hug rubbing his back, feeling him tremble.

 

“B-but I said I was Asexual! That I..I couldn’t feel that kind of attraction, all the times we’ve made out and he g-grinded on me…will he think I wasn’t being honest? W-will he say I was being a perv when I did those things? Am I a perv? Oh God Suga I-”

 

“Asahi shhhh” He could feel Suga begin to rub circles on his back, humming a simple lullaby to get him to focus. “Asahi, Noya loves and trusts you. You know he wouldn’t hold it against you right?”

 

“B-but Suga-san I-”

 

“Asahi!” Suga pulled away and looked straight at Asahi.”We all get confused about what we are, and what we are not. Did you or did you not say you only felt this way recently?”

 

“W-Well yeah but what does this have to do-?”

 

“Then that means you weren’t lying . Asahi everyone knows how much you care and adore Noya, and he knows that better than anyone. Anyone with ears can hear the love in his voice whenever he talks about you . I don’t know what these feelings mean, but I know about one thing...just because you feel it now doesn’t mean you were lying about your sexuality. Now stop telling yourself that because it’s not true.” Suga pulls him back into an even tighter hug as tears begin to roll down his face feeling overwhelmed.

 

“Thank you Suga…”

 

“Don’t thank me, we are here for you no matter what. What this means for your sexuality, and your relationship I’m not sure...but I do know Asahi” Squeezing him once more for reassurance “No matter what happens we all love you and that’s not gonna change. You need to talk to Noya about all of this since communication is key.” Pulling away Suga reached for a napkin in his bag handing it to Asahi “It might be scary but Noya will always listen when it comes to something important. You can do it.”

 

“Thank you…”

 

“What did I say about thanking me Asahi?”

 

“I-I….I’m sorry”

 

“Don’t apologize either!” Suga said lightly smacking the back of his head letting a fond chuckle escape his lips. “Although I don’t want to leave, I promise... we have to get to class. You don’t have to come to practice today if you still feel this anxious, I can just tell them you weren’t feeling well.”

 

“I...I understand...thanks Suga-san”

 

“Anytime Asahi, I hope you feel better.”

 

With that the pair unceremoniously packed up their belongings and walked to class. You could have asked him what he had for lunch, what was his current class, or even his name but he wouldn’t be able to respond back. His mind was on auto pilot as he thought back to the very start of his and Yuu’s relationship. Back when Noya had spontaneously proclaimed his feelings for him as they walked home from practice. The colors of the sunset painting the sky in shades of reds and blues with purple clouds dancing across as the orange rays dyed Noya’s skin. If he could go back he’d want to take a picture of that moment and carry it with him forever. The look of determination in Noya’s voice, the way the blush dusted his cheeks, the way his eyes pierced through him and beneath the gaze all Asahi could feel was loved. There went his mind again thinking about Yuu; about Yuu’s zest for life allowing him to enchant others with his infectious energy. About Yuu’s tenacity making him a force of nature thundering through with unmatched ferocity. About Yuu’s courage to overcome anything in his way, keeping the words of his grandfather to live with no regrets. Yuu who his mind constantly reaches for in this time of unease that it has no room for anything else. Breathing in an attempt to banish the feelings he felt a sigh escape his lips. Gazing into the distance he remembered the response he had given Yuu.

 

For a moment time stopped as he stared at Noya with wide eyes, as he looked ethereal with the sun disappearing.

 

“Noya….” Feeling his head spin, throat closing, lungs forgetting to breathe, and heart threatening to explode out of his chest. He could feel it all threaten to overflow as the stars that began to occupy the sky. “I-I….I can’t”

 

“What? Asahi do you not feel the same way?”

 

“N-NO! I mean It’s not like that! Wait… I do too. I like you so much Noya.”

 

“Asahi, are you being insecure again? How many times do I have to say it, you are wonderful-” Noya began walking towards him as the sun was barely visible on the horizon. He began to rant on everything he adored about him, the whole time Asahi could only focus on the force behind the words as Noya practically shouted at him.

 

“Noya, I can’t go out with you! It...I-I...I’m asexual Nishinoya, I can’t…” Asahi let out a sigh, “I could never go that far with you….I’m not...I can’t give you everything a relationship needs.”

 

“Are you kidding me?”

 

“I’m sorry Noya, I’ll just go if you want me to, I just…”

 

“ Don’t . Asahi, I know you are Asexual and don’t want to ever have intercourse with anyone; including me. I don’t care about that .” He hissed between his teeth as Asahi froze on the spot.”Do you think that all I would ever want in a relationship is sex?”

 

“Nishinoya that’s not what I meant...I”

 

“Listen to me Asahi, and listen well, I don’t care if we never do anything sexual! All I want is for you to stay by my side, for all the highs and baggage that comes with it! I would never have asked you to be my boyfriend if I didn’t feel like I couldn’t handle it.” Crossing his arms with the piercing gaze returning,” Sex isn’t neccessary for a relationship, it never has been and never will be. All I want is to wake up and say that my boyfriend is Asahi Azumane, to love you and be loved in return.” Nishinoya stood in front of him as a breeze passed by, reaching for his hands.”We can figure it out together, that's what being in a relationship means. Azumane...if you feel the same, give us a chance, I’m ready whenever you are.”

 

Asahi pulled Noya in for a hug, feeling tears leave his eyes, “of course Yuu....It’s all I’ve ever wanted.”

 

“Then be my boyfriend, let’s figure it out together . Remember what I promised when you came back to the team? I have your back so trust me and keep moving forward.”

 

The bell rang, snapping Asahi out of another trance that distracted him for God knows how long. Shoving his belongings into his bag he walked to his next class just wishing for the day to end. Thoughts of Yuu refused to leave as a warm feeling came over him like the bear hugs Noya loved. Yuu, who, when Asahi is feeling down will do whatever it takes to make him feel better. Yuu, who, when they were first testing the waters, slowed down to walk with him. Yuu, who, when he gets the chance reminds him that he loves him no matter what. Yuu who knows him better than anyone else. Yuu who saw him at his worst and at his best, loving him through it all. Nishinoya Yuu who drove him absolutely mad with all his mischief and teasing. Yuu with his go with the flow attitude accepting cards he’s dealt with little trouble. He loves him and is confident that Noya loves him right back. Feeling tension in his body finally relax he busied himself again copying the notes he saw. That still doesn’t explain those feelings in me...Suga’s right, one way or another I have to talk to Nishinoya. Although I may feel nervous, we did promise to find things out together as a pair. He will have my back no matter what happens. I trust you Noya....

 

Time dragged on as he tried to take down notes as his mind began to wonder once more. What if everything backfires? What if he no longer wants to be with me? What if he breaks up with me cause I lied to him? I never meant to feel this way. I didn’t even know I could ever feel this way towards anyone! I never meant to say I’m asexual only to discover that may not be the case. I...Closing his eyes he glanced at his phone turning on to check the time, 20 more minutes till it ends . Looking at his lockscreen he could see Yuu smiling brightly at the camera while wearing the ace’s jersey. He could feel the oh so tortuous sparks travel through him. The way he looked with his hair down, the mischievous glint in his eyes as he posed seductively making fireworks burn in his stomach. What he thought was once a cute photo of his troublemaker of his love now reminded him of how much Asahi wanted him... Shutting his eyes he recalled the story behind the picture.

 

It was after they had gone out on a date when it rained unexpectedly and they got soaked. After apologizing profusely for not checking the weather as he asked Noya to shower before he got sick. It was only then he realized that his clothes were still wet from the rain. Anxious as ever, Asahi ran to his room in an attempt to find anything that could possibly fit, but being much taller made it impossible. He was still searching when Noya came into his room with a towel wrapped around his waist as he leaned against the door smiling wickedly.

 

“Azu why is your room a mess? Did you not expect me to come over? ” He cocked an eyebrow as he walked into the room.

 

“Noya! What...how long have you been there?”

 

“Azu you can call me Yuu, we are dating”

 

“Sorry No- I mean Yuu. I was just trying to look for something you could wear while your clothes dry.” He smiled sheepishly scratching his face letting his gaze fall on Noya. He looked so different when his hair wasn’t spiked up in gel. “Sorry for the mess, I just can’t find anything.”

 

“Are you sure about that Azumane?” He could tell that he was planning something with the way his voice dipped slightly. The way he said his full name would haunt him in ways even Noya couldn’t dream of.

 

“Yuu whatever it is you’re planning, please no.”

 

“It’s nothing bad!”

 

“You always say that before doing something that gets you and Tanaka in trouble.” Sighing fondly as he could see the glint in Noyas chocolate eyes as something caught his eye. Before he could react to hold him back, he grabbed his jersey from the floor holding it up like a trophy.

 

“I could wear this!” As his signature grin spread across his face.

 

“Noya but that’s too big for you!”

 

“I don’t see that as an issue, and it's not like I have anything else to wear.” He laughed leaving the room with the Aces jersey in hand.

Asahi had been left a blushing mess when he saw Noya walk into the room with his jersey on. As suspected it was too big for him but that only made it more charming as his hair was down, chocolate eyes brightening upon seeing Asahi’s reaction. 

 

“You like what you see?” Wiggling his eyebrows as he threw his head back for extra measure.

 

“Yuu--”

 

“It’s not my fault I’m irresistible.” Laughter bubbling up as he walked proudly in the shirt.

 

“You’re gonna be the death of me!” Shaking his head he pulled Noya in for a hug, “I wish I could keep this moment with me. You’re too beautiful Yuu, it’s unfair. ” He could feel the heat rising to his cheeks as he let the words escape his mouth.

 

“You could take a picture of me if you want to, that way you can always remember your attractive boyfriend wherever you go.”

 

“What...?” He looked into Noya’s eyes feeling his widen.

 

“I said you could take a picture of me you dork….only if you want to tho. I don’t mind posing for my boyfriend.” Letting the boyfriend part drag on a little too long he winked at him, and he could have sworn his soul left his body as he remembered the playful look.

 

“Yuu! Don’t say things like that if you don’t...I mean I wouldn’t be opposed.” Looking away from him choosing to focus on the floor.

 

“Then what are you waiting for? Take a picture then” Noya walked across the room leaning against a chair.

 

“Are you sure you’re okay with it Noya? I don’t want you to feel forced or something.”

 

“Azumane…”He could feel his boyfriend roll his eyes without having to look at his face, ”Would I ask if I felt bothered by it? You know I would tell you if I was uncomfortable, when am I ever dishonest or one to hold back?”

 

“I…”

 

“What was that?” He could sense the impatience coming from Noya as he crossed his arms.

 

“Never Yuu. You always speak your mind no matter what” Holding up his phone camera making sure all of Noya was in the shot, “It’s one of the many things I love about you.”

 

“You love me Azumane?” Clutching his chest and putting a hand on his forehead, “What a scandal! Tell me, what else do you love about me?”

 

“Yuu please!” 

 

“I love you too Asahi~” 

 

“Yuu!”

Looking back at the lock screen he can feel the love radiating off of it as the I love you too rang in his mind. Noya loves me, he loves me as I love him. I...he will be honest with me at the very least no matter what changes. Noya promised to have my back, he always is there. I can’t back out, I have to let him know how I feel... He knows that this is so uncharacteristic of him, but when it came to something as important as this, he had no choice but to be bold. Feeling daring he texted Noya to meet him in front of school before he lost his resolve. He needed to talk with Yuu as soon as possible before the confidence in his body left. Class was over shortly after and texting Suga that he wouldn’t be going to practice. He sprinted to the entrance of the school restlessness spreading knowing he’d soon be able to bury himself into Noyas arms and find out what this meant for them