#we've seen this dynamic of being in love with someone you dont know three times

[ninethousandbees]

sorry to butt in but I don’t really see this as...a problem in their relationship per se? Like surely this is the whole point of the Harrow/Alecto relationship at this point in the series - what do you do when the imaginary girl in your head is now a real person with her own feelings and goals who doesn’t really know you and isn’t in love with you? What do you do when you can’t project all of your love and longing onto someone who can’t reciprocate anymore? What if the purpose for yours and your House’s existence woke up and refused to destroy you, leaving you facing the possibility of having to live outside the role you’ve been forced into since birth?

(Yeah I do think that Harrow was kind of done a disservice by NTN because of all the characters, her arc seems to be the one that cuts off at the most awkward point but I also think that if you look at all three books you can still figure out where she’s probably going)

I've seen multiple posts that make me think people want Harrow to be further along in her character arc than she actually is and I get why, I’m pretty sure it’s a similar reason to why Kiriona blindsided people. Gideon’s narration at the end of HTN is so incredibly romantic and devoted that pre-Nona it was easy to think that all the anger and perceived abandonment she also expressed in that speech would pale in comparison to her love for Harrow but as we’ve seen now its going to be the other way around - the issues have to be properly confronted before the love can truly flourish. Same goes for Harrow - yes, HTN made it blatantly obvious that she’s in love with Gideon and I think she know it too. She’s also carrying around a pile of guilt the size of Canaan House about how she treated Gideon in the past and about (as she sees it) ‘letting’ her die. Obviously she knows that Gideon has forgiven her for the former but nevertheless I don’t think that Gideon loving her back will have even crossed her mind as a possibility.

The lobotomy proves that Harrow will put Gideon above her duty to Alecto when it really comes down to it which is extremely important character development, don’t get me wrong! But it also doesn’t mean that her duty to and love for/obsession with Alecto just disappear, and I think that’s actually crucial to her arc. Harrow was born to guard Alecto’s tomb, and for that birth 200 other children were killed, a fact which has fucked Harrow up horribly and means that she sees herself as inhuman, an abomination. The Tomb being her life’s purpose and her perception of herself as being unlovable are why she latches onto Alecto as an object for all her love and affection - if she loves the girl inside the tomb, then she has a reason to keep living, and the Body is a safe target for love because (until now) there was no chance she could love Harrow back and make her confront that huge pit of self-loathing. Anyway tl;dr I think exploring Harrow and Alecto’s relationship means exploring Harrow’s duty to the Locked Tomb/the Ninth House and what that even means any more and also dealing properly with her feelings of monstrousness due to the circumstances of her birth and if I’m right then I’m very excited for that, I think it’ll be cathartic as hell.

my early new year's resolution is I shut up about "I want to journey to find god" . but anyway alecto doesn't even care about her specifically enough to love her or hate her. But does like her enough that it's not fun one-sided angst. but doesn't like her enough that it's sweet. but doesn't dislike her enough that it's funny. a situationship so vague that the main interesting part is how everyone else reacts