#we're skanking all night

[twstinginthewind]

Hmm ... would it really be fair for me to tell you what I associate with you? 'Cause it would be so on the nose. :3c

But I do think of you whenever I hear ska. And see checkers. Especially orange ones!

I also associate you with fancy teas from all over the world, marmalade and diner vibes.

I can't help it!! These are my braaaaaaand. I can and will make an all-ska Heartslabyul playlist, because that's why I was first drawn to them. The checks! The vibe! Trey's lil white trilby.

THERE IS A DINER FOR SALE BY MY HOME IF I HAD A MILLION DOLLARS I would still need a lot more to buy it but buddy am I tempted.

[takamimami]

(Angst for the 100 follower event)

Eustass Kidd having a massive argument with us over his temper and how he's too loud and then when we try and get some fresh air we accidentally fall off the ship 🙏 (The last part is a joke-- I was thinking actually like him being in denial about him being too much sometimes which causes him to say shit he did not mean to say!! And then Quincy advises us to dump his ass which we do and then we're both just sad and lonely, then the entire crew goes out drinking completely unaware of what has happened and we get drunk and end up kissing some random guy in front of Kidd and he gets angry then hate sex then apologies then reconciliation!!!)

Yes I am rather drunk whilst I am writing this.

Hello, hello, I have finally shut off my video games long enough to finish this prompt, lol! I giggled out loud when your request came in, just so you know. Additionally, I struggled to combine all three of the prompts you suggested - so I took some creative liberties and split the last two prompts between Kidd and Law. I hope that is alright :3 As promised, this is the smutty pt. 2 to THIS request - still a bit angsty but mostly hurt/comfort with some makeup sex :3 I hope I did your idea justice!!

Kidd/Law x F!Reader - NSFW - "Don't touch me!" (Kidd) and "Please, tell me you're okay." (Law)

STORY UNDER THE CUT - MINORS/AGELESS BLOGS DNI 🔞

CW: SMUT; dub-con (kidd), possessive and dom kidd vibes, hand necklace (kidd) both of them are meanies :3, spanking (law), law fucks you on his desk, kidd calls you 'princess', crew mate!reader ---word count ~1.8k each

You had managed to avoid your captain for three days, and the crew finally had enough of your moping around the ship on the fourth day when you finally docked at your new destination. They forced convinced to you to get dressed up and come into town with all of them, shoving drink after drink in your face as everyone tries to get you to let loose and enjoy your night. It works for most of the night until you get a little too drunk and end up kissing a random stranger in the middle of the bar, your captain’s eyes angrily watching the entire occurrence and storming off immediately after.

You regret the entire situation the moment you see the hurt in your captain’s eyes, and the alcohol in your veins clouds your better judgment as you take off after him, following after him and his vice-captain as they make their way back to the ship. You sober up slightly on the walk back, and as you approach the gangway you can hear your captain’s angry voice echoing into the night.

🌷

His voice was angrier than you’d ever heard it, enough to make you falter a step as you heard him arguing back and forth with Killer as you walked up onto the deck.

“I don’t give a damn how drunk she was,” he seethes, his back facing you as he continues yelling. “She’s fucking delusional if she thinks I want anything to do with a skank like her! She can go whore herself to the whole fucking island, for all I care!”

Your stomach turned at the malice in his tone, and Killer puts his arms up over his head as he sees you watching and listening from the edge of the deck. 

“Kidd,” he says soothingly, trying to calm him down, “You’re just upset. Don’t say things you’ll regret later.”

Kidd notices Killer’s gaze looking over his shoulder and he turns around to meet your bleary eyes, his own amber eyes softening as he takes in the expression on your face.

You’d already beat yourself up about the kiss on the walk back to the ship, but hearing those harsh words leave Kidd’s lips felt like a knife to your gut. The tears that burned your eyes caused you to turn your face from him, wiping them away before they could fall as Kidd moved in your direction.

“Y/N,” he murmurs, reaching a hand out to you as he approaches. “I didn’t…”

“Cause you’re some fucking saint, right Kidd?” you retort back at him, masking the hurt you were feeling with anger nearly matching the intensity of his own moments ago.

You see his eye twitch and his lip curl at your accusation, his step faltering slightly before he continues approaching you, slowing down ever so slightly.

“Never claimed to be a saint, princess,” he growls, “But I’m not the one running around kissing strangers after telling someone they love them.”

You feel the burning in your eyes rise again, his smug tone making your lip quiver as you try to keep the angry ember burning inside of you.

“You didn’t ask me to love you, remember? Maybe I’m trying not to anymore.”

Kidd’s hand reaches out to you and yanks you towards him by your forearm, his grip rough as he leans down so his face is a mere inch from yours.

“And how is that working for you?”

You tug your arm away from his grip, and he lets you go with an evil grin, eyes ablaze as he watches you back away from him. He stalks towards you again and reaches like he’s going to grab you again, but you swat at his hand defiantly.

“Don’t touch me!”

Kidd’s hand flinches back at the tone in your voice, stopping mid-stride he stares at you intently, gauging your reaction as your chest rises and falls with your heavy breathing.

After a few moments, Kidd resumes his steps, closing enough of the distance between the two of you to where you can feel his shallow breaths ghosting over your collarbone.

His smirk returns as he hears the slight hitch in your breathing, noting the twinkle of desire in your eye as he hovers over you.

“You sure you don’t want me to touch you, princess,” he croons, his fingertips ghosting over the skin of your arm as he defies your earlier command.

You shudder at the feeling, your throat going dry as his fingers send a shiver down your back. He traces his fingers up your arm and down the front of you, stopping to toy with the waistband of your skirt as he drops his eyes to where his hand is. 

“I bet that sweet little cunt of yours will tell me a different story,” he murmurs, dropping his head down and connecting his lips to your neck, placing wet kisses along your jaw as he slips his fingers down into your panties.

He hisses at the feeling of you, and you flush at just how easy it is for him to slip a finger inside of you, a feeble moan falling from your lips as he begins pumping it in and out of you. 

You’re grateful Killer had taken his leave once he felt the shift in the conversation, biting down on your lip as you try to stifle the moans Kidd is so effortlessly pulling from you. You feel your body arch into his touch as he slips in another finger, your hips bucking as he presses his thumb to your throbbing clit.

Just when you feel the pressure begin to build in your core, Kidd pulls away from you entirely, holding your angry gaze as he brings his fingers to his lips.

“Too bad you don’t want me to touch you,” he purrs, turning and walking away from your panting form. 

You snap out of the shock after he gets a few steps away, your own lip curling into a wicked grin as you call out after him.

“Maybe I’ll go have the guy at the bar touch me. His kiss was decent enough.”

Kidd’s hands are on you in an instant, pressing you down by your neck against a nearby table as he looms over you, eyes blazing.

“I fucking dare you.”

You feel the damp heat pooling in your legs as he stands between them, Kidd’s free hand tugging at his pants as he pulls out his cock and teases the head of it against your clothed cunt - pulling the fabric to the side an teasing your entrance a moment later. You both hiss at the sensation, and Kidd’s hips snap into you hastily, a strangled cry escaping your throat as he bullies himself into your warmth and immediately sets a punishing pace.

Your back scraps against the wood of the table as Kidd fucks into you, hand still holding you in place by the throat as he growls from above you. The sudden sting of his intrusion quickly melts into pleasure as he angles his hips to hit that sweet spot inside you.

“You think his cock would’ve felt as good as mine, hm? You think he would’ve been able to make you scream like I can?”

Your only reply is a throaty moan as Kidd pumps his hips into yours, your vision going blurry as the pressure in your core begins to intensify. Kidd’s hand tightens around your throat as you close your eyes, causing them to snap back open and meet his amber orbs.

“Answer me.”

You shiver as he growls out his command, his metal hand reaching down to rub harsh circles on your clit.

“No!” you shutter, the volume of your voice rising with each hard thrust of Kidd’s hips.

Kidd’s response is a grunted laugh, his pace slowing as he feels your walls begin to flutter around him. 

“Tell me who this pussy belongs to,” he commands, his slow and deliberate thrusts punctuating his words.

You roll your eyes and bark out a laugh. “Fuck you,” you grit out between your teeth.

Kidd barks a laugh back, his mocking tone riling you up even more as he presses his hips to yours. 

“Isn’t that what we're doing, princess?” A quick snap of his hips and you hear the table creak from the pressure. “Tell me.”

You feel yourself involuntarily clamp down around Kidd’s length, his hand tightening in reaction as he stops his movements altogether and ruts his hips against yours, the movement not nearly enough to satiate you. 

You whine desperately as you try to buck your hips against him, his torturous stare boring into you as he holds you still. 

“It’s yours,” you gasp out, exasperated and desperate to feel him moving inside you again. 

“Hmm?” He croons, and your cheeks flush as you meet his heated gaze.

“It’s yours,” you say louder, more conviction in your voice as you see the triumphant grin curl onto Kidd’s lips.

He pulls himself out of you, nearly leaving you completely, before slamming himself back into you, the tip of his cock kissing your cervix as he pulls you to the edge of the table and pistons in and out of you. His metal finger returns to your clit and your moans vibrate through your chest as the cord in your abdomen tightens.

“Come for me, princess,” he hums from above you, losing himself in your grip as he feels his own orgasm rear its head. 

You do as he commands, your orgasm washing over you as your eyes screw shut, stars dancing behind your eyelids as you feel your voice go hoarse from calling out for him. You claw at the edge of the table as Kidd rocks into you, each wave of your orgasm causing your cunt to grip him tighter and tighter as his thrusts grow slower and sloppier, finally coming to a halt after he’s spent. Your labored breaths are the only thing that can be heard as soft waves rock against the ship until you slowly start to hear voices approaching in the distance - signaling the return of your crew.

Kidd wordlessly scoops you up into his arms, whisking you away to his quarters below the deck before anyone has a chance to see the two of you. Once inside, he sets you down gently on the bed, leaning over you and keeping his head nuzzled in your neck as he contemplates the next thing to say to you.

“I’m sorry.”

The last two words you were expecting leave his mouth, and you feel a lump form in your throat as he pulls away and rests his forehead against yours.

“For everything.”

Your mind flashes back to the heated words you two had exchanged over the past week, the tenderness in Kidd’s voice a soothing balm over the wounds that had been opened up in the process. You bring a hand to his face and stroke the soft skin of his cheek, his face leaning into your touch as your eyes haze over with sleep.

“You can continue apologizing in the morning,” you muse, a yawn escaping your lips as you cuddle down into his blanket, feeling him crawl into the bed behind you and pull you towards his chest.

“Does that mean I’m not forgiven yet?”

You chuckle lightly, rolling around to face him and press a gentle kiss to his lips.

“Nope,” you say with a wink, smiling at him teasingly. “You’re gunna have to do better than that.”

He blinks down at you unexpectedly, your challenge settling into his mind as his devilish grin returns. He flips you onto your back and tugs at your clothes, no longer willing to let you sleep until he proves to you just how sorry he really was.

🐯

“I’m fine, Bepo,” Law growls, dismissing him with a wave of his hand as he continues further into the ship. “I don’t care what she does, she’s the last of my concerns right now.”

Bepo waddles behind him wearily as he stomps towards his office, your quiet footsteps following them from a distance as you try to muster up the courage to face Law in his current state.

“Are you sure about that… Captain?” 

You hear Bepo’s weary voice as you approach the door, your footsteps coming to a halt just outside the office. You barely hear the grumbled response from Law as your heart begins thundering in your chest, swallowing hard as you will your legs to move you forward, stopping in the doorway as your heavy eyes look across the room to your captain.

His eyes take you in, and you try to mask the weariness on your face as he finally meets your gaze. He only holds it for a moment, before a scowl curls up onto his lips and he looks away, pulling his hat from his head and running his fingers through his hair.

“I-I’m gunna go…” Bepo stutters, and you glance at him with pleading eyes, trying to beg him not to abandon you. But he’s gone an instant later - leaving you in an uncomfortable tension hanging in the air.

Neither of you speak for a long while, neither of you able to find the right thing to address first. 

Law huffs out a deep sigh as he collapses into his chair, resting his elbows on his desk and clawing at his hair again.

“Did you need something, Y/N?” was all he could think to say, the edge in his voice teetering on annoyance as he struggled to grapple with the chaos of emotions in his head.

You clenched your fists tighter to your sides as you struggled to breathe, words escaping you as you searched your brain for something to say that wasn’t laced with the venom you wanted to spew back at him. You wanted to scream at him - wanted to make him realize the hurt he’d caused you to feel the last few days. You supposed the kiss with a random stranger had succeeded in that partially, but now he had the audacity to be the one acting upset?

Your mind raced a mile a minute as Law sat staring at you, his brows furrowed as he watched your gaze turn from sorrowful to… angry? There was something sparking through the haze in your eyes that he couldn’t put his finger on, and he braced himself as your chest rose with a deep inhale.

But instead of a snide comment, a feeble laugh was all you could muster as you loosed the breath you held, feeling your shoulders relax as you shut your eyes and turned on your heels. 

“Y/N,” Law’s voice held a commanding tone as he called out to you, and you paused mid-stride to glance over your shoulder at him.

To your surprise he had began to rise from his seat, and as you turned to face him once more he crossed the room in a few long strides, stopping less than a foot away from you. He reaches out an arm to you and you flinch away from him, his hand dropping when he sees your reaction.

“Are you… alright?”

You huff out another laugh at the question, and you swear Law flinches at your reaction. His brows furrow in irritation momentarily before softening again, and he puffs out a sigh before speaking again.

“I… I realize I may have been a bit… harsh with you the other day,” he says through gritted teeth, as if it pained him to admit he may have been in the wrong. “And I realize that you only pushed as hard as you did because you care.” He raises a hand to the back of his head and casts his gaze around the room, avoiding eye contact as he tries to find any words to ease the pain still lingering in your expression.

Still you remained silent, sensing how every non-response sent his pulse sky rocketing. You were unsure why, but something about the way you were effortlessly able to get under his skin had a smirk threatening to curl onto your lips as he leaned closer, eyes softening even more as he reaches a hand toward your chin.

You don’t flinch away from him this time, allowing him to pull your chin closer to his with his index finger, the touch gentle as his breath tickles the side of your neck. 

“Say something,” he pleads, his voice barely more than a whisper now, “Please. Tell me you’re alright, tell me you hate me - say anything, Y/N-ya.” His voice trembles a bit as he says your name, and any smugness you had felt dissipates at the sound.

You feel your lip quiver as you try to figure out what to say - what you want to say - and the two of you remain that way for a few more heartbeats before you finally break the silence.

“You… are a real asshole when you’re angry… you know that?” You drawl, sensing Law relax a bit at the smirk you offer him for a quick moment before your lips fall back into a harsh line. 

Law huffs out a deep chuckle, the sound vibrating in your chest as he leans his head down towards your ear, kicking the door shut behind him before leading you further into the office.

“Says the girl who just threw herself at a stranger after making sure I was watching her every move.”

Your back stiffened as you felt the edge of Law’s desk press into the back of your legs, papers rustling behind you from the slight disturbance you’d caused.

“I did no such thing,” you said defiantly, though your voice came out less convincing than you had wanted it to. You swallowed hard as Law pulled his head back to look at you, his eyes a shade darker than they had been a moment ago as they watch the bob of your throat. 

“Keep lying to me, and I’ll have to punish you, Y/N-ya.”

Your thighs squeezed together at the threat, and you curse whatever broken part of you causes you to melt at the sight of your captain like this - at the condescending tone in his voice.

“I’m not,” you whisper, pressing your body against his as he watches you through heavy lids, “But I’ll gladly take whatever punishment you deem necessary, Captain.”

He hisses as you reach down and palm him through his pants, his considerable length pressing against his pants painfully. He grabs your wrist to halt your movements and your eyes fly up to meet his heated glare and biting your lip as a growl escapes his lips.

“Turn around.”

The command in his voice has heat pooling in your core as you turn and bend over the edge of his desk, not caring what papers you scatter to the floor in the process. Law silently lurks behind you, running a hand over your ass tenderly before pulling the waistband of your bottoms down, exposing yourself to him. He growls again, this time rubbing the flesh of your ass harshly before lifting his hand and bringing it down onto your ass cheek with a sharp slap.

“That,” he groans, and you hear him fidget with the buttons on his pants, “Is for disobeying your captain’s orders in the first place.”

Another slap to your opposite ass cheek has you crying out at the sensation, the sting of his hand immediately being soothed by his fingers as he kneads the swollen area.

“That… is for arguing with me and then avoiding me for three days.”

You wince as his hand raises again, a whine escaping his lips as he tears the underwear from your legs and pulls your back up and flush to his chest, his erection pressing between your ass cheeks as he breathes harshly along the shell of your ear.

“You’re too loud,” he groans, balling your underwear up and shoving it into your mouth as a make-shift gag. “Keep quiet or I’ll cut this punishment short.”

You nod your head as he leans you back over the desk, tracing your entrance with the tip of his cock as you bite back a moan. Law grabs your forearms and crosses them over your back, gripping both of them in one hand as he presses himself into your warmth, a muffled moan escaping your lips despite your best efforts.

“Quiet,” Law snaps, pulling himself from you and laying another smack to your ass as you feel tears begin to prickle at the corners of your eyes. Your breathing is labored as he presses back into you, this time sinking into your walls completely, the stretch of him inside you causing your eyes to water further as the slight pain melts into pleasure as he sets a punishing pace as he moves in and out of you.

The sound of your skin slapping together fills the office, the sound accompanied by Law’s husky grunts and your muffled moans. You really did try to contain them, but the feeling of him moving inside you was too overwhelming for you to care about the sounds coming out of you.

Law yanks your arms back, causing your back to arch up off the desk as he leans forward and wraps an arm around your shoulders. The new angle has you leaning back into him, meeting him thrust for thrust as he feels your walls tighten around him.

“You never know when to shut the hell up, do you?”

Your defiant response is to let out an even louder cry as he releases the hand around your arms and wraps it around you to thumb at your clit, chasing after his own release as you tumble into your orgasm. You feel yourself clamp around him tightly as the waves of pleasure have your vision blurring, your mouth going dry as you try to cry out his name. Law hears your attempts and pulls the underwear from your mouth, his cock twitching when he’s finally able to hear his name fall from your lips. You feel his body tenses and his legs begin to shake as Law drags his cock hastily through your walls, until finally his thrusts grow sloppy and his own orgasm washes over him. Each grunt of your name sends a wave of goosebumps over your skin as he comes to a still behind you, peppering your shoulder with gentle kisses as he lifts his hand and the two of your bodies are replaced by pillows inside his office.

Back in Law’s quarters, he pulls you into his arms and kisses you needily, trying to convey all the emotions he’s wrestled with over the past few days with the action.

“Just so you know,” he says when he finally pulls away, his eyes falling to your puffy and swollen lips as he licks his own, “I do want you here. I always want you here, Y/N-ya.”

You feel your chest tighten as you think back to the heated words the two of you had exchanged days prior, letting out a small sigh of relief at the reassuring words you’d been waiting to hear. “Even if I don’t know how to shut the hell up?”

Law grins, a devilish twinkle sparkling in his eye as he dips his head back down to yours.

“Especially because of that.”

100 Follower Event Masterlist ✨come say hai :3✨

[somethingvicked]

When Love and Hate Collide

Eddie Munson song-fic.

Song lyrics belong to the band Def Leppard!

warnings: female reader, cruel Eddie, angst!

Eddie walked out of his trailer, seeing you sitting on your own porch in the opposite lot with your boombox beside you, listening to your music. Usually your music taste was similar to his, but when you were in a low mood you always went for power ballads. He used to teased you about that but right now he felt like someone had punched him when he saw you refusing to look in his direction, writing in your notebook, silently lip-syncing to the song.

You could have a change of heart If you would only change your mind Instead of slamming down the phone, girl For the hundredth time

He had tried calling you, reasoning with you, begging your forgiveness but it was plain to see that this time you've had enough.

I got your number on my wall But I ain't gonna make that call When divided we stand, baby United we fall

You two had been best friends forever. Your parents had rented the trailer in the lot opposite his and Wayne's when you were barely four years old and you had hit it off immediately.

He couldn't say when those feelings had developed into love. Maybe when your parents had sent you to camp the whole summer and you hadn't seen each other for two months? Maybe it was when Gareth Heath had commented on how you had come back from summer camp with a 'rack of lamb'? Maybe it was when you said that you had a small crush on Patrick Swayze and he got furious because Swayze was a pretty boy, nothing like him and he wanted you to think of only him.

Yet, he never acted on those feelings, despite the hints you dropped. He was scared that if it didn't work out he would lose you forever. That was his worst nightmare. He'd rather stay just friends then.

Got the time, got a chance, gonna make it Got my hands on your heart, gonna take it All I know I can't fight this flame

It was plain to see that it hurt you. Especially when he got drunk and flirted with other girls - maybe just to see how jealous you got, to ensure him you still loved him and only him - or when he sold weed to cheerleaders and they flirted with him, wearing their short skirts and scratching his arm with their painted nails to get a reduced price.

You never did anything of the sort. You were in love with Eddie and wanted no one else. Good thing you didn't because he might have punched the guy you showed the slighest bit of interest in.

It was only because Patrick Swayze was a hundred miles away in Hollywood - and too old for you - that Eddie hadn't killed him.

Not really, but still.

You could have a change of heart If you would only change your mind 'Cause I'm crazy 'bout you, baby Time after time

But last night at the Hideout when some skank (your words, not his) had all but draped herself over him and he had done nothing to prevent it, despite talking to you merely seconds before, you had slammed down your glass on the bar counter top and walked out.

He had pushed the girl off of him and raced after you wondering what was wrong and you had turned around, looking at him with such hatred in your eyes that he had to take a step back. Your voice was colder than ice when you said: "I'm done. Done, Munson (not Eddie. Munson.). You've been hurting me for years. Friends don't do that. And since you claim that's the only thing we are, then I say it's a shitty friendship and I'm better off without it. We're done. Don't call me. Don't visit. Don't talk to me. Never again."

Without you, one night alone Is like a year without you baby Do you have a heart of stone? Without you Can't stop the hurt inside When love and hate collide

He had been struck by surprise, then paralyzing fear before he shook himself out of it. You couldn't mean it... right? No, you were just angry. You would get over it and understand he didn't mean anything by it. You always did.

He had cursed himself a million times over for not going after you when you walked off. He had gone back inside, thinking a little distance would make you cool down.

It was merely hours later that he realized what a mistake he had made.

When he got home he had tried calling you, but you didn't answer. When your parents answered the phone they didn't even bother lying to him - they said you didn't want to talk to him and that was that.

He went over to your place the next day but you didn't come to the door. He knew you were home because once again your mom refused to lie to him, she simply said that you didn't want to see him and that he had to respect your choice.

When Monday rolled around you took the bus to school from the trailer park. You hadn't done that in years, always riding with him in his van. In school you avoided him like the plague, sitting with Robin instead of the Hellfire table. When the guys heard what had happened they all looked at him as if he had killed someone. Or rather, killed you.

I don't wanna fight no more I don't know what we're fighting for When we treat each other, baby Like an act of war

Now he didn't know what to do. It was like someone had reached into his chest and cut his heart out. He had tried saying sorry, even put letters underneath your door, saying he would do better. You still didn't talk to him.

Deep inside he hoped you would again, that you would realize that you missed him, just like he missed you. But for every day that passed he slowly realized that whatever feelings you had for him, he had fucked up one time too many and the pan of the scale had tipped over.

I could tell a million lies And it would come as no surprise When the truth is like a stranger Hits you right between the eyes

"You got to make this right," Wayne said when Eddie all but cried for help. "You obviously don't see her as a friend. Not to mention you hurt her so many times - trying to have your cake and eat it too! That's such a cruel thing to do, Eddie! I've not raised you to act like that! So tell her how you feel. For real. And you better spend the rest of your time making it up to her!"

There's a time and a place and a reason And I know I got a love to believe in All I know Got to win this time

So that same night he showed up on your porch with his acoustic guitar, strumming out the tones to the song you had played just the other day. Not caring whether your parents heard him or even called the cops on him.

Without you, one night alone Is like a year without you, baby Do you have a heart of stone? Without you Can't stop the hurt inside When love and hate collide

You could have a change of heart If you would only change your mind 'Cause I'm crazy 'bout you, baby Crazy, crazy

You opened the door, meeting his gaze for the first time in days.

"I... I love you, sweetheart," Eddie whispered. "I'm so sorry. So sorry for how I behaved. Please... please give me a chance to make this right. I can't live without you."

You shook your head. "I'm so goddamn angry at you, Eddie Munson. But... I love you too I thought it would be easier, living without you. It's not! I miss you so much!"

Eddie smiled and ran up to her, wrapping his arms around her tightly, both of them crying.

"But I'm telling you now - I'll castrate you if you ever hurt me again!" Y/N whispered and Eddie chuckled.

"I'll hand you the knife, baby."

"Don't bother - I'll use a spoon."

Without you, one night alone Is like a year without you, baby Do you have a heart of stone? Without you, one night alone Is like a year without you, baby If you have a heart at all Without you I can't stop the hurt inside When love and hate collide

@eddiemunsonfuxks

(please, like, comment and reblog!

Your likes are wonderful, but reblogs expand my reading circle!)

[elfieafterdark]

You were, and I say this incredibly lightly Harrow, so fucking stupid dude. For starters, it's a fucking pommel. Call it a pommel you dumb fuck.

We're walking down some innocuous hallway on the space station thing. I keep forgetting its name because it's pretentious and not sexy. But anyways you walked down this hallway (The sexiness of your walk was up for debate, I mean, is it really sexy if the exoskeleton is doing all the work for you?)

The interior was silent, save for the dim whirr of machinery and the faint hiss of piping pumping that sweet sweet oxygen into the room. You were very tired, but that's nothing new. Ever since that ORTUS guy broke through your excessive bone wards you haven't slept a wink.

That's probably why I have so much free reign actually, did you know I can sort of hear your thoughts. They're pretty gay I'm not gonna lie.

Your room offered no safety now, though arguably neither did your new sanctum. Harrow my dear, I hope you can tell how much dripping, succulent venom I injected into that word. Because I do not like this blonde haggette in the slightest.

You shuffle, and rub your neck. Seemingly aware of me again, but that's fine, so long as you think I'm one of your normal hallucinations you won't bleed out your ears too much.

Plus, I'm here, and you can heal. It's fine, walk it off champ. I'm not going anywhere, you saw to that didn't you? Anyways that fucking skank is in her room already, with all of the sexy rocking pictures on the walls.

Got to say my midnight mistress, if I ever managed to escape the prison that is your head we got to try that out. Obviously I wouldn't say that directly to you because you would probably rip my bones out of my body all at once.

Look, I'm just saying... No one can pull off the starved, and slightly deranged look, but you come close.

Anyways, I feel like I'm getting distracted here. You walk in, she says some dumb shit I don't care about, and you scowl at her.

Atta gal.

God, I can't believe you sleep in her bed. I mean I get that the redhead is scary, but damn. She wants to rearrange your guts Harrow, and not in the deadly way.

I hate her. Anyways, I'm not exactly sure why I decided to pay attention here, because you just went to sleep. Which let me chill, thank fuck.

But then something really weird happened Harrow. I still don't understand it, it hasn't really happened since I came back; since I wound up stuck in your head but...

You left.

Completely. What the fuck? It's so quiet in here without you. Unacceptable.

I waited impatiently all damned night, unable to stop my silent vigil even if I wanted to. Listening to you breathe so softly and delicately while Ianthe snores like a dick.

I only rest once I feel you returning, from wherever you went. Don't you fucking dare make a habit out of this Nonagesmius, because... Ironically...

I can't conceive of a universe without you in it, and I died to make sure it never happened.

So fucking stupid... Don't do that again.

[fool-counter]

September first, 1989, dear diary...

I believe I'm a good person

You know, I think there's good in everyone, but here we are first day of senior year

I look around at these kids I've known all my life and

I ask myself: What happened?

(Freak! Slut! Burnout! Bug-Eyes! Poser! Lard Ass!)

We were so tiny, happy and shiny, playing tag and getting chased

(Freak! Slut! Loser! Sh—s!)

Singing and clapping

Laughing and napping

Baking cookies, eating paste

(Bull-d—! Stuck-up! Hunchback!)

Then we got bigger

That was the trigger

Like the Huns invading Rome

Sorry!

Welcome to my school

This ain't no high school

This is the Thunderdome

Hold your breath

And count the days

We're graduating soon

(White trash!)

College will be paradise

If I'm not dead by June!

But I know, I know, life can be beautiful

I pray, I pray for a better way

If we changed back then

We could change again

We can be beautiful

Ow!

Just not today

Hey, are you okay?

Get away, nerd

(Freak! Slut! Cr—le! Homo! Homo! Homo!)

Things will get better

Soon as my letter

Comes from Yale, or Duke, or Brown

Awake from this coma

Take my diploma

Then I can blow this town

Dream of ivy-covered walls

And smoky French cafes

(Watch it!)

Fight the urge to strike a match and send this dump ablaze!

Ooops

Ram Sweeney, third year as linebacker

And eighth year of smacking lunch trays and being a huge dick!

What did you say to me skank?

Aaah, nothing!

But I know, I know, I know

Life can be beautiful

I pray, I pray

For a better way

We were kind before

We can be kind once more

We can be beautiful

Ah! Hey Martha

Hey

Martha Dumpstock

My best friend since diapers

Are we on for movie night?

Yeah, you're on Jiffy Pop detail

I rented The Princess Bride

Hohoho, again? Wait, don't you have it memorized right now?

What can I say? I'm a sucker for a happy ending

Martha Dumptruck! Wide load!

Kurt Kelly, quarterback, will receive a full scholarship from the University of "dude let's get wasted and light our farts on fire" he is the smartest guy on the football team

Which is kind of like being the tallest dwarf

Hey! Pick that up right now!

I'm sorry, are you actually talking to me?

Yes, I am, I wanna know what gives you the right to pick on my friend?

You're a high school has-been waiting to happen, a future gas station attendant

You got a zit right there

Dear Diary

(Why~)

Why do they hate me?

Why don't I fight back?

Why do I act like such a creep?

(Why~)

Why won't he date me?

Why did I hit him?

Why do I cry myself to sleep?

(Why~!)

Students

Somebody hug me!

Somebody fix me!

Somebody save me!

Send me a sign, God!

Give me some hope here!

Something to live for!

Ah! Heather, Heather, and Heather!

And then there's the Heathers, they float above it all

I love Heather, Heather, and Heather

Heather McNamara, head cheerleader, her dad is loaded, he sells engagement rings

I hate Heather, Heather, and Heather!

Heather Duke, runs the yearbook, no discernible personality,

But her mom did pay for implants

I want Heather, Heather, and Heather!

And Heather Chandler, the almighty

She is a mythic bitch

They are solid Teflon

Never bothered, never harassed

I would give anything to be like that

I'd like to be their boyfriend

That would be beautiful!

If I sat at their table, guys would notice me

So beautiful!

I'd like them to be nicer

That would be beautiful!

I'd like to kidnap a Heather and photograph her naked in an abandoned warehouse

And leave her tied up for the rats!

....That's not so beautiful!

Grow up, Heather, bulimia is so '87

Maybe you should see a doctor, Heather

Yeah, Heather, maybe I should

Ah, Heather and Heather and Heather

Perhaps you didn't hear the bell over all the vomiting

You're late for class

Heather wasn't feeling well, we're helping her

Not without a hall pass you're not. Week's detention

Actually, Miss Fleming, all four of us are out on a hall pass

Yearbook committee

I see you're all listed

Hurry up and get where you're going

This is an excellent forgery

Who are you?

Veronica Sawyer

I crave a boon

What boon?

Hm, let me sit at your table at lunch

Just once

No talking necessary

If people think you guys tolerate me, they'll leave me alone

Before you answer, I also do report cards, permission slips and absence notes

How about prescriptions?

Shut up, Heather

Yeah! Did you have a brain tumor for breakfast, Heather?

Sorry, Heather

For a greasy little nobody, you do have good bone structure

And a symmetrical face

If I took a meat cleaver down the center of your skull I'd have matching halves

That's very important

Of course, you could stand to lose a few pounds

And you know, you know, you know?

This could be beautiful

Mascara, maybe some lip gloss

And we're on our way

Get this girl some blush

And Heather, I need your brush

Let's make her beautiful

Let's make her beautiful

Let's make her beautiful

Make her beautiful

Okay?

Okay!

Out of my way geek!

I don't want trouble

You're gonna die at 3PM!

Don't you dare touch me! Get away, pervert!

What'd I ever do to them?

Who could survive this?

I can't escape this!

I think I'm dying!

Who's that with Heather?

Whoa. Heather, Heather, Heather

And someone!

Heather, Heather, Heather

And a babe!

Heather, Heather, Heather

Veronica?!

Veronica, Veronica, Veronica

And you know

You know, you know

Life can be beautiful

You hope, you dream, you pray

And you get your way!

Ask me how it feels

Wearin' these rad ass heels!

My God, it's beautiful!

I might be beautiful

And when you're beautiful

It's a beautiful frickin' day!

Heather! Heather! Heather! Veronica!

Heather! Heather! Heather! Veronica! Veronica! Veronica! Veronica!

September first, 1989, dear diary...

I believe I'm a good person

You know, I think there's good in everyone, but here we are first day of senior year

I look around at these kids I've known all my life and

I ask myself: What happened?

(Freak! Slut! Burnout! Bug-Eyes! Poser! Lard Ass!)

We were so tiny, happy and shiny, playing tag and getting chased

(Freak! Slut! Loser! Sh—s!)

Singing and clapping

Laughing and napping

Baking cookies, eating paste

(Bull-d—! Stuck-up! Hunchback!)

Then we got bigger

That was the trigger

Like the Huns invading Rome

Sorry!

Welcome to my school

This ain't no high school

This is the Thunderdome

Hold your breath

And count the days

We're graduating soon

(White trash!)

College will be paradise

If I'm not dead by June!

But I know, I know, life can be beautiful

I pray, I pray for a better way

If we changed back then

We could change again

We can be beautiful

Ow!

Just not today

Hey, are you okay?

Get away, nerd

(Freak! Slut! Cr—le! Homo! Homo! Homo!)

Things will get better

Soon as my letter

Comes from Yale, or Duke, or Brown

Awake from this coma

Take my diploma

Then I can blow this town

Dream of ivy-covered walls

And smoky French cafes

(Watch it!)

Fight the urge to strike a match and send this dump ablaze!

Ooops

Ram Sweeney, third year as linebacker

And eighth year of smacking lunch trays and being a huge dick!

What did you say to me skank?

Aaah, nothing!

But I know, I know, I know

Life can be beautiful

I pray, I pray

For a better way

We were kind before

We can be kind once more

We can be beautiful

Ah! Hey Martha

Hey

Martha Dumpstock

My best friend since diapers

Are we on for movie night?

Yeah, you're on Jiffy Pop detail

I rented The Princess Bride

Hohoho, again? Wait, don't you have it memorized right now?

What can I say? I'm a sucker for a happy ending

Martha Dumptruck! Wide load!

Kurt Kelly, quarterback, will receive a full scholarship from the University of "dude let's get wasted and light our farts on fire" he is the smartest guy on the football team

Which is kind of like being the tallest dwarf

Hey! Pick that up right now!

I'm sorry, are you actually talking to me?

Yes, I am, I wanna know what gives you the right to pick on my friend?

You're a high school has-been waiting to happen, a future gas station attendant

You got a zit right there

Dear Diary

(Why~)

Why do they hate me?

Why don't I fight back?

Why do I act like such a creep?

(Why~)

Why won't he date me?

Why did I hit him?

Why do I cry myself to sleep?

(Why~!)

Students

Somebody hug me!

Somebody fix me!

Somebody save me!

Send me a sign, God!

Give me some hope here!

Something to live for!

Ah! Heather, Heather, and Heather!

And then there's the Heathers, they float above it all

I love Heather, Heather, and Heather

Heather McNamara, head cheerleader, her dad is loaded, he sells engagement rings

I hate Heather, Heather, and Heather!

Heather Duke, runs the yearbook, no discernible personality,

But her mom did pay for implants

I want Heather, Heather, and Heather!

And Heather Chandler, the almighty

She is a mythic bitch

They are solid Teflon

Never bothered, never harassed

I would give anything to be like that

I'd like to be their boyfriend

That would be beautiful!

If I sat at their table, guys would notice me

So beautiful!

I'd like them to be nicer

That would be beautiful!

I'd like to kidnap a Heather and photograph her naked in an abandoned warehouse

And leave her tied up for the rats!

....That's not so beautiful!

Grow up, Heather, bulimia is so '87

Maybe you should see a doctor, Heather

Yeah, Heather, maybe I should

Ah, Heather and Heather and Heather

Perhaps you didn't hear the bell over all the vomiting

You're late for class

Heather wasn't feeling well, we're helping her

Not without a hall pass you're not. Week's detention

Actually, Miss Fleming, all four of us are out on a hall pass

Yearbook committee

I see you're all listed

Hurry up and get where you're going

This is an excellent forgery

Who are you?

Veronica Sawyer

I crave a boon

What boon?

Hm, let me sit at your table at lunch

Just once

No talking necessary

If people think you guys tolerate me, they'll leave me alone

Before you answer, I also do report cards, permission slips and absence notes

How about prescriptions?

Shut up, Heather

Yeah! Did you have a brain tumor for breakfast, Heather?

Sorry, Heather

For a greasy little nobody, you do have good bone structure

And a symmetrical face

If I took a meat cleaver down the center of your skull I'd have matching halves

That's very important

Of course, you could stand to lose a few pounds

And you know, you know, you know?

This could be beautiful

Mascara, maybe some lip gloss

And we're on our way

Get this girl some blush

And Heather, I need your brush

Let's make her beautiful

Let's make her beautiful

Let's make her beautiful

Make her beautiful

Okay?

Okay!

Out of my way geek!

I don't want trouble

You're gonna die at 3PM!

Don't you dare touch me! Get away, pervert!

What'd I ever do to them?

Who could survive this?

I can't escape this!

I think I'm dying!

Who's that with Heather?

Whoa. Heather, Heather, Heather

And someone!

Heather, Heather, Heather

And a babe!

Heather, Heather, Heather

Veronica?!

Veronica, Veronica, Veronica

And you know

You know, you know

Life can be beautiful

You hope, you dream, you pray

And you get your way!

Ask me how it feels

Wearin' these rad ass heels!

My God, it's beautiful!

I might be beautiful

And when you're beautiful

It's a beautiful frickin' day!

Heather! Heather! Heather! Veronica!

Heather! Heather! Heather! Veronica! Veronica! Veronica! Veronica!

fool count: 36

beautiful... beautifool... it all starts to blend together after a while...

[illusionsdelusions101]

Will it Ever be Okay?~ Alejandro Garnacho and Rasmus Hojlund

A/N: WE'RE BACK LADIES, GERMS AND EVERYTHING ELSE! Requested by the lovely @screechingphantompuppy thank you <3 Idk if i can write poly relationships lol

Genre: Angst with a smidge of fluff

Warnings: None(?)

Requested?: Yes

After the Burnley match, the Man United team stumble sadly into the changing room. Erik gave them a speech and as soon as he was out the door, the team burst into chatter. Most importantly, Rasmus and Alejandro. "I did so shit." Alejandro said. "It's okay... dude." Rasmus put a hand on his shoulder awkwardly. Alejandro noted that and the word "dude". Alejandro looks at him with confusing eyes, making Rasmus take his hand of Ale's shoulder. Once they were both changed and it seemed the tunnel was empty and no one was coming Alejandro and Rasmus waved goodbye to the rest of the team, they left quickly, luckily. Soon, you appeared out of an entrance. "All clear?" You whisper. They nod at you and you make your way over to your boys. Yes, your boys. Alejandro and Rasmus were a thing maybe a month before they met you. Knowing that the public would go feral, they kept quiet. And then they found you, sipping on your martini, looking lonely at the bar. After losing a game of rock, paper, scissors, Rasmus goes and strikes a conversation with you. You hit it off, Rasmus introducing Alejandro as his boyfriend, made you sad a little. Both such handsome men and both of them were taken by each other, shame. They can tell your mood shift and Rasmus blurted randomly "We're looking for a third partner." and that was it. After multiple dates (them wearing hats and sunglasses to cover up) you agreed to join them in their relationship. You hug both of them together and planted a kiss on each of their lips. "I'm sorry about the match, babes, but ye can do better in the next one!" You said cheerfully. Ale smiled at that and immediately got better. "Ready to go home?" You take both of their hands, knowing you're going to have to quickly let go soon. "You know what Ras said to me in the locker rooms? "Dude." and he put his hand on my shoulder like a bro thing." Alejandro snickers and your laugh bounces off the walls. "What? Do you want everyone to find out, including our parents?" He talks back. Your voices silently echo through the tunnel, and a faint step of boots follow behind, none of you realising. The next day, you got up late, sandwiched between the boys, you pry out and reach for your phone. "Holy." "SHIT." You shriek. The lads got up in an instant. "What is it babes?" Rasmus is quickly to pull you in his arms but you push slightly back. "THEY KNOW. EVERYONE KNOWS. THE WHOLE WORLD KNOWS." You say, your voice threatening to go to whispering level. "About what?" Ale rubs his eyes. "About us." Tabloids, magazines, newspapers, news articles, Twitter, Instagram, Youtube, whatever app, there was pictures with you, Hoijlund and Garnacho kissing in last nights tunnel, holding hands, laughing. Video clips of you kissing them, speaking to them, them to you. Everything. "Okay, okay." Rasmus is pacing around the room, your staring into nothing and Ale is snooping around on the internet. "Fans are pissed. Like, PISSED. Threatening to throw us off the team, finding us, shooting us, calling you," Ale jerks his head in your direction. "a slut, a skank, not satisfied" He turns off the phone and then launches it across the room. "FUCK." He cries into his hands. Each of your parents called each one of you. Ale's and Ras's parents were shouting like you can hear them in the whole building and yours were the same. You motion for Rasmus to stop pacing and you grab Ale's shoulders and Rasmus's shoulders. "It'll be okay. We have each other. Everything will be okay." They nodded into your chest. But you were lying to them and yourself. Will it ever be okay?

[saintsir4n]

3. BUSTED

keep liking and commenting

WARNING: GUNS AND EXPLOSIONS

WHEN Carson pulled up in her baby – correction her hellcat, people parted as she did so. She blew her car a kiss, something she always did and quickly joined the rest of the crew. Letty was behind her, swaying her hips and chucking an arm around Carson and Mia.

Carson thought it was a good turnout, the area was full of cars, even a few she did the designs for.

She then nudged the Ortiz woman, seeing her godbrother talking to two blondes.

"Oh he's in trouble now," Carson said, laughing alongside Mia, trailing behind Letty who annoyedly walked over to Dom.

Letty appeared in front of them, growling at the blondes, "I smell." she sniffed the air, "Skanks, Why don't you girls just pack it up before I leave tread marks on your face?"

The blondes turned away, leaving Dom to his girlfriend's ire, "Letty, I was just talking," he tried explaining.

"Yeah, whatever." Letty snapped, looking as pissed as ever.

Dom gave up and went over to Hector and his acquaintance Edwin.

It was Carson's turn to swing an arm around the Ortiz racer, "That's what you get for going out with him instead of me and Mia."

"Yeah, could've had us," Mia added, gesturing between her and Carson.

Letty cracked a small smile, but it quickly faltered when they heard Dom's voice, "Okay, Hector..."

Carson's attention was quickly captured by a lime-green Mitsubishi. Brian stood next to it, leaning with his hands in his pockets, scanning the crowd until his gaze settled on her and smiled.

She couldn't help but smile back, but to say Vince wasn't impressed was an understatement. He and Jesse were near, and Leon was off making sure the cops were elsewhere for the night.

"You tell him where we're gonna be Summer?" Letty asked quietly, making sure that none of the guys could hear.

Carson shook her head, "Nope."

"You're a shitty liar," Mia pointed out, whilst looking around for another familiar face.

Carson shrugged, "And what about it."

She then nudged Mia, nodding over to Keelie who made her way over, squealing when she joined the women, who all welcomed her, one much more intimate than the others.

"Hey, girl," Keelie smiled at the youngest Torreto, who blushed faster than anyone thought possible.

Vince and Jesse shamelessly scanned Keelie's outfit, whilst Dom continued to talk to Hector, well that was until Brian came closer.

"One race, 2g buy-in. Winner takes all," Dom said, making Carson break from the girls, "Hector, you're going to hold the cash."

"Why Hector?" Another racer asked, handing his money over to Hector.

"Cause he's too slow to make away with the money," Edwin said, making them all laugh.

Carson handed her money over, silently praying she would get it back tenfold, "Don't forget I could chase him down even in heels." Luckily she was wearing sneakers today.

"And there's that too," Dom added, whilst Hector playfully glared at her.

"Good luck, guys," Hector nodded at the four racers.

"Hey, wait. Hold up," it was Brian's voice, and he came between them, holding up a pink slip, "I don't have any money, but I do have a pink slip to my car."

Carson made a face and then quickly turned to see Keelie and Mia wiggle their brows at her.

"Hey, you just can't climb in the ring with Ali 'cause you think you box," she heard Jesse say.

That's when Brian pointed to an annoyed Vince, smirking, "He knows I can box." Carson let a giggle slip which earned a glare from Vince. "So, check it out. It's like this. I lose, winner takes my car, clean and clear. But if I win, I take the cash and I take the respect."

The people around them laughed.

Dom smirked with a laugh, "Respect?"

Carson wondered if Brian had any shame or if he just had the biggest balls...which begged the question, did she want to see them?

Mia chuckled, whilst Keelie and Letty smirked.

"To some people that's more important." Brian continued, shooting a glance at the Baker racer.

"That your car?" Dom bobbed his head towards his lime green 1995 Mitsubishi Eclipse.

The rest of the crew and some others walked over it.

Jesse popped the hood and revealed a glistening sight.

Carson's jaw dropped, but it was Jesse who was gushing.

He listed, "I see a cool air intake. It's got a NOS fogger system and a T4 turbo, Dominic," Jesse couldn't tear his eyes away, "I see an AIC controller. It has direct port nitrous injection."

"Yeah. And a stand-alone fuel management system." Dom added, shocked by what he was seeing, "Not a bad way to spend $10,000."

Edwin stepped towards the car, inspecting the car's insides. "You see that shit? He's got enough NOS in there to blow himself up. Period."

"Amateurs don't use Nitrous oxide, not with heavy feet," Carson mumbled, though everyone heard her. Could he handle it? She then hoped that she didn't mess up because all their asses would be on the line. But she did want every part of his car.

"So what do you say?" Brian asked, directing his question at Dom, "Am I worthy?"

"We don't know yet," Dom said, grinning. He pointed towards Brian, "But you're in. Let's go."

"Yo Dom, could I rub your head for good luck?" Carson's jest earned her a swift shove and a few laughs.

It wasn't long before all the racers pulled up their cars to the starting line. Brian had to inch his car backwards, amusing the hecklers around him.

Carson had to admit she was nervous, her biggest competition was Dom, but Brian was new and she'd never seen him race before. She wanted to win, she had to. They were on either side of her. The interior of her car was different from the exterior, neon pink lights clung to the lining, somehow she managed to add it in, not without doing a few extra shifts at the nail salon.

"This is for you Dad," she mumbled, tracing her hands over the wheel and checking the NOS near her, "let's pray I don't blow up in this bitch."

She could faintly hear the chanting from Keelie and saw Mia waving at her.

Brian's cheeky smile was even prominent through her peripheral, but she couldn't get distracted, so when Leon called that they were in the clear, Hector raised his arms. She sucked in deep breaths and let her engine roar, just as loud as the rest of them.

The crowd boomed when the fire blew from the tailpipes.

Hector lowered his arms and yelled, "Go!" Every racer sped off, tears screeching and leaving marks on the ground.

"Come on girl, be nice to me," Carson murmured, determined and serious, thinking about one thing and one thing only. She gripped her wheel tightly, wearing an uncharacteristically mean mug.

With every yard, she skated further ahead, it was now her, Dom and Brian.

Carson's heart was beating so fast she could hear it pumping in her ears, but she didn't care, she switched gears like her life depended on it. The wind blew through the strands of her hair and clung to her face.

She manoeuvred effortlessly and senselessly just like her dad taught her, work with your car, not against it, and that she did.

She knew Dom was smiling next to her, it's all he did whenever they raced.

She could hear the shift in Brain's engine, the fucker used his NOS... way too early, leaving her and Dom neck and neck. Her foot was pressing on the gas so hard, she couldn't feel it. One bottom was pressed and then another. The street lights were merely dots that went by. 5 cars became 2 and with the finishing line in view, there could only be one winner. And with one last stretch, Carson gasped, zooming past the line as Dom was just an inch behind her, just an inch.

She couldn't believe it, not when cheers descended and the crowd rounded her car. She had to blink, if she didn't her eyes would get stuck and she would miss the look on Dom's face.

He was proud when she finally stepped out of the car and allowed the attention to break through.

The crew were quick to applaud and hug her.

"You did it kid," Dom embraced her shortly after her girlfriends pulled away.

"Guess I didn't need that head rub," she joked.

"Yeah shut up," he pulled away, saying, "Uncle Danny would be proud."

"He really would Summer," Vince added and pressed a kiss to her cheek, before picking her up and hugging her again.

Keelie nudged Mia and Letty, pointing to Brian's face when he pulled up in his car, he seemed neutral at first but grew annoyed when he saw Vince all over Carson.

"Here's what you want, right here," Hector said, his hands full of the money and giving it over to Carson with a grin, "There you go."

"Keke, wanna count it," she called out to her friend who happily accepted it.

"You know I do," the nail technician beamed but was ready to fight if someone took it off of her.

Everyone was cheering, Dom was happy and still lifted Letty in his arms, not caring for this loss. He wanted a rematch though.

Brain got out of his car, grinning as the crowd swarmed him.

"Brian, maybe you could be my trophy," Carson's quip made him and a few others laugh.

"That's your new car," Vince made sure that everyone could hear, keeping an arm around Carson.

"Was it fun?" Jesse asked sarcastically, popping the hood of Carson's new car, coughing when smoke poured out. The crowd heckled and laughed.

"Damn, it's gonna give me asthma," Carson said, wafting it out of her face. She still wanted the parts, but they looked like they were closer to death than anything.

"Girl you're gonna have to wear a gasmask driving that thing," she heard Keelie say, attempting to pass over the money, but Carson motioned for her to keep it until they got home.

"What are you smilin' about?" Dom asked, confused about Brian's big grin, everyone was.

"Dude, I almost had you," Brian said, smiling widely, making the people around him cheer.

"You almost had me?" Dom replied, a smirk painted all over his face. "You never had me. You never had your car!"

"Ohhh!" the crowd roared just as Brian's smile faltered.

"Granny shiftin', not double-clutchin' like you should." Dom continued, starting to circle the car, drawing more laughter from the crowd. He soaked up the praise and outstretched her arms, "You're lucky that hundred-shot of NOS didn't blow the welds on the intake. Almost had me? Now me, Summer and the mad scientist gotta rip apart the block and replace the piston rings you fried."

"My new car is a mess Brian," Carson whined, softly pulling away from Vince. "You got a heavy foot, more of an amateur than I thought," she wasn't trying to be mean, but the crowd was eating it up, "but you gotta take some lessons."

"From you, the champ?" Brian's eyes dragged up and down her form, then zeroed in on her eyes, making her smile grow.

He wanted to win, not just for the respect, but for a chance to take her out on a date.

"Yeah, from me," Carson said back, beaming at him.

"You tell him, Barbie!" somebody shouted.

But their back and forth was cut short when Leon alerted them about the police coming at them from all ends.

"Cops!" he shouted and everyone scattered.

"Carson," she heard her name being called, it was Brian. He slammed the hood shut and jumped into his old car.

Carson then tossed her keys to Keelie, "Look after my child, take Mia to the house okay?"

Keelie nodded, knowing she was the only one trusted to drive her car. She then grabbed Mia's hand and went their way.

Carson felt a tug on her arm and she jumped into the Eclipse, turning to Brian, "And I thought I was givin' you some lessons."

"You can later, can't let the champ get caught can I?" he retorted, stepping on the gas, fleeing the scene.

"Nah then you'd just be a sore loser, pretty boy."

"You think I'm pretty?"

"I think you're brave."

"And you know what I think of you," he said, trying to drive as inconspicuously as possible, but the police were close.

Scanning the car's interior, Carson asked, "And what do you think of me, tell me whilst I think about my win."

He chuckled, "You're a skilful artist."

"Thank you."

"Even better driver."

She laughed, "Obviously."

Brian's smile widened when he glanced at her, "The most beautiful girl –"

"Shit, there's Dom," Carson cut him off, pointing at the oldest Torreto sibling who was trying to outrun the police, "Can't keep out of trouble."

Brian swerved, pulling up to the man, "Get in."

When Dom pulled open the passenger seat, he expected Carson to move but she shook her head, "Get in the back 2nd place."

"You're never gonna let that go are you?" Dom groaned, trying to move to the back of the car, awkwardly crouching near the NOS as Brian started to drive.

"Of course, I won't, when have you known me to be humble?"

"It's not in your nature," he murmured, then turned to Brian, "When did you pick her up? Matter of fact why?"

The blonde scrunched up his face, "Want me to leave her to get arrested?"

"I'm right here," Carson expressed, getting their attention, "Just be grateful neither of us are in trouble."

"You're the last person I expected to show up," Dom admitted, staring at Brian, gripping onto the front seats he drifted, causing the police cars to collide behind them.

Carson said nothing, even though she knew he was right. Dom had fired, then humiliated him in front of everyone and even though she took his car, he still showed up, wanting to get to know her and help out Dom.

Brian looked at him. "Yeah, well, I thought if I got in your good graces, you might help convince Carson to keep my car."

"Nope," she was quick to interrupt, amusing the two guys, "but he's in your good graces right Dominic?"

He ignored her question, flicked her ear and received the middle finger

"You drive like you've done this before. What are you? A wheelman?" He then asked Brian.

"Nah, man." Brian denied, shaking his head.

"And just like Pinocchio, his nose grew," Carson remarked, to which the blonde just shrugged off her claim. "Like seriously, how can you just drive like this?"

"Impressed?" Brian sent her a smile.

"I would be if you beat me."

"There's always next time," it sounded more like a promise than anything.

"You ever boost cars?" Dom pressed, wanting their flirting to end.

Brian shook his head.

"Ever done time?" Carson paused, "hard to believe you ever did, especially with how you look."

Dom chuckled at the insinuation.

"A couple of overnighters, no big deal," Brian said nonchalantly.

"It is a big deal," Carson replied, making the blonde snap his head towards her, surprised that she seemed annoyed.

"What about the two years in juvie for boostin' cars?" Dom suddenly questioned, placing a hand on his godsister's shoulder aware she hated the idea of prison or jail because of him. Brian glanced at him. "Yeah, I had Jesse run a profile for Brian Earl Spilner. You'll find anythin' on the web, anything about anyone. So, why the bullshit?"

Carson certainly was surprised but looked out the window and blocked out the conversation.

Brian cleared his throat, "So, what about you?"

"Two years in Lompoc. I'll die before I go back," Dom squeezed Carson's shoulder.

She visited every weekend that he was inside or whenever she didn't have school, she barely scraped enough grades to pass because of him and even four years later he was still grateful, and he would always be.

Carson snapped out of it when she heard engines come from behind them and she realized what neighbourhood they were in.

"Oh shit."

"Ah, great." Dom groaned, cursing himself for not realizing it before.

Brian's brows pinched together, "What?"

"Let's hope he stays nice," Carson said to Dom.

"He won't do anything with you around," he replied, hearing the motorbikes surround them.

Brian turned back to Carson, appearing less confused and more suspicious, "Who's he?"

She pinched the bridge of her nose, "You'll see."

Carson shifted in her seat, rolling her shoulders back when her eyes met Johnny Tran. Who — on his motorbike trailed the side of their car. Dom glanced at her with a knowing look, aware of their history. They didn't date or sleep together, just one drunken kiss that she even admitted was good but she set her boundaries, she wouldn't get into a relationship with someone bad for business and more importantly bad for her family.

Johnny in Johnny fashion was always strapped and tapped his gun against Brian's window.

"Follow us!" He shouted and sped off with his crew. Brian followed behind, without question.

They came to a stop in T & K Food Market, a place where Carson and Keelie used to stop by, but had to stop so she could avoid Johnny.

Carson and Brian got out of the car, the former pulled on her seat, allowing her Godbrother for out also.

She made sure to stay close to Dom when Tran's crew removed their helmets and surrounded them.

Johnny's eyes were immediately drawn to Carson. Brain didn't like that, not one bit. It was clear they had some sort of history but one subtle head shake from Dom and he forced himself to stay calm.

Carson recognised Johnny's cousin Lance who made sure not to look at her the way Johnny was.

"Summer, long time no see. You miss me?" He asked, carelessly waving his gun about, so she made sure not to rile him up.

"I dunno, but I know you miss me," she replied, feigning interest as she felt Brian's eyes burn into her head.

Johnny chuckled, then suddenly held a gun to Dom's chest, "I thought we had an agreement. You stay away, I stay away. Everybody stays happy."

"We got lost." Dom deadpanned, pulling Carson behind him, "What do you want me to tell you?"

"Who's we?" Johnny asked, "Summer might be a Barbie but she ain't dumb," he then directed his attention towards the unfamiliar blonde standing on the other side of the car, who was seconds away from speaking if it wasn't for Dom.

"Uh — my new mechanic. Brian, meet Johnny Tran," Dom introduced, nodding towards Johnny who adorned a menacing smirk. "The guy in the snakeskin pants is his cousin Lance. So, when are you going to give me a shot at that Honda, 2009 of yours?"

Johnny lowered the gun and scanned Brian's old car, "This, your ride?"

"It was." Brian nodded towards Carson. "It's hers now."

"Really? Don't look like one of your designs, Summer." Johnny's eyes darted between the Eclipse and the Baker woman.

Carson denied, "It's not mine, right Dom?"

The Godsiblings had a feeling of what was about to happen.

Dom agreed, "No it's not. She hasn't taken delivery yet."

"Then it's nobody's car." Johnny said, running a hand over the hood, before shooting a glance at his cousin, "Somebody put in the wrench time. What do you think, Lance?"

Lance stepped closer, gun raised, "It's an amazing machine."

Johnny laughed. "Yes it is," he roughly patted Dom's arm as he turned to his crew. "Let's go. I'll see you in the desert next month. Be ready to have your ass handed to you."

"You're going to need more than that crotch rocket to beat me," Dom played along.

"I got something for you." Johnny climbed onto his motorbike, and his crew followed, all revving their engines as a giggling woman joined him and wrapped her arms around his torso. He finally shot a smirk at Carson, "Stay hot Summer."

Soon they all took off, leaving the trio to stand in silence until Brian broke it, "What the hell was that?" He glanced at Carson, "That your boyfriend or somethin'?"

She just rolled her eyes, making his frustration grow.

"It's a long story." Dom sighed, checking over his Godsister, "We'll tell you later. Let's get out of here."

The moment his hand touched the car, Johnny and Lance appeared guns raised and shot at the car. Carson let out a scream when Dom dragged her away, Brian dodged all bullets from the other side.

The Eclipse caught fire and the cousins left.

"My car —"Carson's whining was cut short when she caught the stench of a familiar smell.

The realisation dawned on Dom, making him yell, "NOS!"

The trio ran away as the car blew up, the flames and smoke blurred their vision and stung their eyes. Carson was shielded by Dom's body.

Dom checked for any injury, just as Brian came over worried that she was hurt.

"I'm all good guys, still pretty," she reassured them, "but my fit smells like smoke."

Dom smirked, knowing that was a sign she was alright but Brian wasn't sure.

She sighed, "Can we go now?"

Dom nodded, and then to Brian, who asked, "Now, what the hell was that all about?"

Carson began to walk ahead of the two men.

"It's a long story." Dom sighed.

"Well, we've got a 20-mile hike. Humour me."

"Tran's obsessed with me!" Carson exclaimed, catching a glimpse of Dom nodding in agreement. "And he's not my man."

"And I slept with his sister," Dom added."

Brian's questions didn't stop there.

___

Carson let out a breath she didn't know was holding when she heard the blaring music from the house. She beamed at the sight of her car, running over and bowing down, feeling around the front tire where Keelie left her keys. After she blew a kiss in its direction she immediately rushed into the house, completely leaving Brian and Dom in the wind. She was greeted by some of the crew with their guilt-ridden faces.

"Nah, you can drop the guilt, I'm not the one who's mad –" her rant was cut off when Dom opened up the door, frustrated and annoyed, "Yikes, where's Mia?"

"Upstairs with Keke," Letty mumbled, getting up from the ground and approaching her boyfriend.

Now Carson knew not to go upstairs, she did not need to walk in on anything in particular, so she left them alone.

Jesse was too busy smooching to realise she was there, well that was until she shoved him away, causing the woman to groan and walk away.

"You're a hater sunshine!" He drunkenly snarled.

"Yeah, should've taken it upstairs Casanova," She gave him a sarcastic smile.

"Yo Dom, why'd you bring the buster in here?" she heard Vince's voice and she turned around, to see Vince's mad expression.

Dom yelled, "Cus the buster kept me and Summer out of handcuffs!" her gaze drifted over to Brain who stood out like a sore thumb, he cast her a small smile, but she could tell he was uncomfortable, which made her feel bad. "He didn't just run back to the fort. The buster brought us back."

Carson decided to block out the rest of the conversation, already feeling Vince's stare and how it hardened when Dom took his bear and strolled over to Brian to give him one.

"Vincent, drop it," she approached him, already feeling a little off about the night shift. The Johnny interaction annoyed her more than freaked her out. Being shot at was the norm. She knew Dom and the guys got up to know good and decided it wasn't her business, but that didn't stop her from worrying. "You're tellin' me blondie bothers you that much."

Vince snapped his head towards her, "I don't trust him, neither should you," his gaze drifted back to Brain who smugly drunk his beer, "Can't believe you like him."

"I...."

Vince stood from his seat, "Don't bother lyin', I've known you since before you knew what pink was. I don't trust him. Leon don't either. Jesse is on the front."

"Vince..."

"The same thing happened with Johnny remember that? You were naive and shit turn sideways."

"Screw you!"

She frustratedly groaned when he stormed off, towards the staircase, gunning for Brian, with Leon and Jesse in stride.

She rolled her eyes and rushed over, pushing through, coming to the blonde's aid, "Cut the shit Vincent." she snapped.

"He shouldn't be here," Vince sneered.

She scoffed, "Get over it." then she looked at the other two, "Learn to form your own opinions dumb and dumber."

"Real hurtful Summer," Jesse pouted.

"Oh, come on, sunshine, we were just about to get along," Leon taunted and she knew if she responded she'd snap.

She looked up at Brain, holding out a hand which he took, "I'm thirsty, let's go get me a drink."

He let her drag him off and into the next room.

She settled to the side, watching him sift through the cooler, admiring his behind. Damn did he have a good ass.

"So," Brian asked, "What do you want?"

"Pink gin," Carson replied, checking her nails.

Brain chuckled, "Why am I not surprised?"

"Prefer gin over beer, especially when it's pink. It's a preference Mr. No crust." she teased, as he pulled a batch out, smiling at the label Carson's only, he opened one and walked over, "You know Dom has a crush on you," his eyes widened as he sat down, "What? It's only a man-crush. Bromance, homies or whatever. Even though he might not show it, he does. He normally don't like nobody. He's emotionally frigid."

"Emotionally frigid? Sounds complicated," Brian said, passing her the can.

She took a sip, "Yeah, what about you?"

"I'm simpler," he replied making her laugh.

"You're a shitty liar," Carson remarked, heartbeat accelerating when he placed an arm around her shoulders. "We've got that in common."

"Well, it's a good thing, I can read you," Brian stared at her intently.

"You wanna read me, take me on dates, ask me questions, damn Brian," she listed.

Brian tilted his head, looking down at her glossy lips for a moment before he met her eyes once more.

"I want somethin’ else," his tone dropped, and thankfully she wasn't drinking or she would've choked, then again she wouldn't mind choking on something he provided.

"What?" she whispered.

"Your full name," he paused, seeing the expression on her face, "What? you know mine."

"Ah yes, Brian Earl Spilner," she giggled shifting closer, "You were not blessed in that department."

"Come on, tell me yours and if it's worse than mine, you've been dishing it out for no reason."

"Carson Baker, no middle name. Dad didn't give me one."

"And your mom?" Brain frowned when she did.

"Never met her," Carson answered, taking another sip.

"Well, she's missin' out," his words put a smile back on her face, "So people call you Summer because..."

"Well other than my amazin' bright presence that I'm graciously blessin' you with," Carson stated, "Mia never thought that Carson suited me. So on a random night everyone got wasted, Vince called me Sunny, that punk," Brian noticed her smile broadened at the memory, "and it happened to be durin' Summer, Jesse surprisingly realised and started callin' me, Summer."

"Cute."

"Right, but you never call me that," she noted.

He took a sip of his beer, "I don't."

They just stared at each other for a while, not caring about the people who walked in and out of the room. His arm that rested around her tightened, drawing her closer, their knees touched, and it wouldn't be long until their lips —

A banging from upstairs broke them apart.

"What the...." she trailed off, before realising, "Mia and Keke."

"Yeah, I walked in on them thinkin' it was the bathroom."

They cheekily laughed.

Minutes passed, their drinks were finished and they only got closer if that were even possible.

Her nails trailed over his leg as he randomly whispered things in her ear.

Using his available hand he picked up hers, wondering how she drove with her nails being that long.

"Hey, I wanted to ask you somethin'," he cleared his throat.

She nodded, "Yeah?"

"What happened between you and Tran?"

She sighed, knowing that was coming, she avoided most of his questions on the taxi ride back, and Dom helped her dodge the rest.

"It was a drunken kiss, that's all," It was an answer that still annoyed Brian, he was jealous, but satisfied that it wasn't anything more.

"That's it huh?"

"That's it."

His sparkly blue eyes trailed up and down, "Good."

She cocked her head to the side, "Why's that?"

"Because I wanna take you on a date."

"But you lost, so the deals off." And my Eclipse blew up, she wanted to add but didn't.

"We can make a new one," Brian paused, thinking back to their car ride, "Sorry if I upset you before, wasn't my intention."

A frown briefly made its way back onto her face and she averted her eyes. The last couple of years had been rough, between her dad's recent passing and Dom serving time, people never thought they would see her so down, but only now she's been okay, happier, more like the old Summer.

"It's all good. You didn't know," she finally replied, locking eyes with him.

"Well, it won't happen again," he promised and she took his word on that. The hand that rested on her arm, played with the back of her top, sending a shiver down her spine, "I like you in pink, suits your complexion," he said in that salacious tone that had her licking her lips.

"And what does a white boy like you know about dark skin?" she flirted once more.

"The darker the berry the sweeter the juice right?" He leaned closer, purposefully misquoting, drawing a small smirk from her.

"And what, you wanna taste me huh?"

His gaze dropped to her lips, "If you'll let me, I can be the judge of that..."

"I don't know, wouldn't want you to get addicted."

Their lips were almost touching, but Carson had some restraint, somehow.

"Carson, your eyes already had me hooked, one taste and I'll be feenin', like the sound of that?" Brian proposed, shifting his body, so his brushed against hers.

"I do," just before their lips touched, Carson pulled away, laughing as she did so. Brian just shook his head, trying to hide his amusement but failing, "Come on, you need a shower. Didn't think you would get a kiss, smelling like the gas and nitrous oxide did you?"

"Worth a try," he shrugged, not pulling away, something she liked.

"Try harder."

His brow quirked up, "That a challenge? You know I like them."

"I guess it is."

Brian craned his head to the side, whispering in her ear, "Wanna know somethin’?"

Carson swallowed harshly, "What?"

"You smell so good," he complimented.

She gently pushed him back, wearing the most cheesy smile, which matched his.

"Come on blue eyes," she said standing up.

Brain leaned back, missing her warmth, but his eyes briefly stuck to her outfit, which she didn't mind. She purposefully wore a tight denim skirt to get his attention.

Carson held out a hand and pulled him up, their bodies collided for a second before she led him out of the room.

"You gonna show me some of your moves?" She pulled him near to the side of the living room, away from where the rest of the team was kicking it, "Sure you can keep up with me Blondie?"

"Sometimes I have trouble handlin' the front of my car," Brian paused, wiping his mouth as he stared down at her, hands trailing to her waist and spinning her around, so her back was pressed up against him. "But the back's my speciality, I guess you'll have to see."

Carson's hips swayed to the beat of the R&B record. She loved Tryese's voice and the way Brian's hands controlled her sides, he did too. She snaked her arm around his neck, pulling down his face, allowing him to whisper a few things, here and there. Between the music and his breathy words, she got more and more lost in the vibrations. Whether it was the alcohol or the vibe she loved it.

She didn't want it to stop.

But one look at the time she cursed herself.

"What's wrong?" He asked, loosening his grip, and letting her turn around. "You mad that a white boy's got rhythm?"

"Barely, you were holdin' onto me the entire time," she didn't mind that at all. "But you were that bad."

"Yeah, might need some improvement with the front but the back was fine," his tone dropped slightly. Carson bit back a smile, "Next time I'll be better," he had a small twinkle in his eyes when he spoke.

"Next time?"

"For sure," he just wanted to be around her in all honesty.

Carson was slightly bummed out that she needed to go, but she thought she would offer him a ride.

"We should go, I need my beauty sleep and KeKe will get a lift from Mia so she's all good."

"You gonna give me a lesson on how to win?" He jested.

"Only as long as you pay attention," she jabbed his chest as he let go of her waist.

"Yes ma'am."

Taking his hand again, they weaved through the drunken bodies.

He caught a couple of glares from Leon and Vince, but he didn't care, he had the prettiest girl holding his hand and felt that nothing could touch him.

She pulled out her keys and opened the front door, leading him outside, down the stairs and towards her Dodger.

"Now, Brian this is my child, so don't be slammin' no doors," she advised, then was taken back when he pulled open the driver's side, "Thanks," she mumbled, smiling to herself when she got in. He did a little jog to get to the other side, joined her and appreciated the ambience of the car. "You ready?"

He nodded, sporting his cheeky smile.

And just like that, she reversed and sped off.

"I'm droppin' you off at Harry's right?" He hummed in response. "How you findin' my child, she's perfect ain't she?"

"She's like you ain't she?" He rebutted much to her amusement. "When did you learn to drive?"

"Dad taught me. First time I got in a car," she paused, effortlessly changing gear, and he watched her every move, finding the way she drove extremely attractive. "I was like a baby but the first time I drove, had to be when I was like 6."

"What?" He laughed.

"On God," and she wasn't lying, "My dad didn't let me steer the car for long. I was on his lap and everythin'. I couldn't press the peddles but he made sure I got a mile in before he stopped. Best feeling in the world when I got my licence."

"When I got my learner permit, the guy in front hit the breaks and I drove straight into him," Brian recalled, even adding sounds for effect, making her giggle. "Made me cause a pile-up, 4 or 5 cars maybe," he shook his head in amusement, "First time I drove."

"You're stupid," she couldn't shake the smile on her face.

She shifted the gears again, glad the streets were clear and no police in sight.

Brian appreciated her car, the interior comforted him in some ways. Same with how she drove; calm yet she was hyper-vigilant, even when she talked.

They were a few miles from Harry's and Carson sped up, drifting into a side street, making him grip onto the sides.

"You trust me?" She questioned, wearing a confident smirk.

"I do," and his grip tightened at the speed she was going.

Her foot was somehow both relaxed and forceful on the gas. Amateurs don't use NOS, he realised how much that was true.

The wind that picked up as she blew through the streets gently tapped their faces until she finally reached Harry's.

"Shit," he breathed out, impressed with how she drove.

"And that's why I beat you," She joked, pulling down her mirror and checking herself out. "Brought to you from the champ," she pretended to hold up a microphone and pushed it in his face, drawing a bashful grin from the guy. "Tell us Mr Spilner, how does it feel to be beaten by a girl?"

He wrapped his hand around hers, bringing it up to his mouth, "Well Ms Baker, if I was one of those greased-up sexist pigs, I would care, but losin' to a beautiful girl didn't hurt. Not when she took me as her prize."

She smacked her hand against his chest, a chuckle escaped him.

"I did not take you as a prize," not yet anyway, "But you owe me a car, I want some fresh parts, even if it's not the whole thing," she reminded him, to which he nodded and went to hop out of the car, not before turning back, taking her by surprise and kissing her cheek. He couldn't wait for the real thing, but would until she asked. "Night Brian and thanks for keepin' me out of cuffs."

"It was nothin'," he smiled, he would do it again in a heartbeat. "Night Carson," he got out of the car, gently shut the door, and then settled his hands over the threshold of the window, just in time to see her put her mirror back up. "You can't avoid me either, I got your number now," he playfully taunted.

"What, you're gonna! text me goodnight?" she laughed.

"You know I will," he said. "Watch out for that text beautiful."

And later that night she did and he texted as promised.

They messaged each other throughout the night and until morning.

Carson Baker was officially sprung.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

a/n:

how did you like the outcome of the race? i didn't want it to look like she was necessarily better than dom, but just this once she beat him and he was proud, they all were.

keelie is the only one allowed to drive carson's dodger because that car is literally her baby. also any thoughts on the side romance of keelie and mia... kia? meelie?

johnny tran was so fine in this film. I wanted carson to have some history, a harmless drunken kiss but of course, husband brian wasn't a fan. his jealousy is showing again!

i loved adding extra scenes and dialogue, especially for this chapter. carson's relationship with everyone in the team was shown a bit more, what were your favourite parts?

[jason-dean1989]

beautiful:

[Veronica]

September 1st, 1989

Dear diary

I believe I'm a good person

You know, I think that there's good in everyone

But here we are! First day of senior year!

And uh, I look around at these kids that I've known all my life

And I ask myself: What happened?

[Kids]

Freak! Slut! Burnout! Bug-eyes! Poser! Lard-ass!

[Veronica]

We were so tiny, happy, and shiny

Playing tag and getting chased

[Kids]

Freak! Slut! Loser! Shortbus!

[Veronica]

Singing and clapping, laughing and napping

Baking cookies, eating paste

[Kids]

Bull-dyke! Stuck-up! Hunchback!

[Veronica]

Then we got bigger, that was the trigger

Like the Huns invading Rome

Oh, sorry!

Welcome to my school, this ain't no high school

This is the Thunderdome

Hold your breath and count the days, we're graduating soon

[Kids]

White trash!

[Veronica]

College will be paradise, if I'm not dead by June!

But I know, I know, life can be beautiful

I pray, I pray for a better way

If we changed back then, we could change again

We can be beautiful

[Hipster dork]

Ow!

[Veronica]

Just not today

Hey, are you okay?

[Hipster dork]

Get away, nerd

[Veronica]

Oh, okay

[Kids]

Freak! Slut! Cripple! Homo! Homo! Homo!

[Veronica]

Things will get better soon as my letter

Comes from Harvard, Duke, or Brown

Wake from this coma, take my diploma

Then I can blow this town

Dream of ivy-covered walls and smoky French cafés

[Ram]

Watch it!

[Veronica]

Fight the urge to strike a match and set this dump ablaze!

[Ram]

Oops

[Veronica]

Ram Sweeney, third year as linebacker and eighth year

Of smacking lunch trays and being a huge dick

[Ram]

What did you say to me, skank?

[Veronica]

Aah, nothing!

But I know, I know

(I know, I know)

Life can be beautiful

(Beautiful)

I pray, I pray

(I pray, I pray)

For a better way

(For a better way)

We were kind before

(Ooh)

We can be kind once more

(Ooh)

We can be beautiful

(Ooh, beautiful)

[Veronica]

Agh! Hey, Martha

[Martha]

Hey

[Veronica]

Martha Dunnstock, my best friend since diapers

[Martha]

We on for movie night?

[Veronica]

Yeah, you're on Jiffy Pop detail

[Martha]

I rented The Princess Bride

[Veronica]

Ho-ho-ho, again? Wait, don't you have it memorized by now?

[Martha]

What can I say? I'm a sucker for a happy ending

[Kurt]

Martha Dumptruck! Wide load! Honk!

[Kurt]

Haha!

[Veronica]

Kurt Kelly, quarterback

He is the smartest guy on the football team

Which is kind of like being the tallest dwarf

[Kurt]

Haha! Alright!

[Veronica]

Hey! Pick that up! Right now!

[Kurt]

I'm sorry, are you actually talking to me?

[Veronica]

Yes, I am

I wanna know what gives you the right to pick on my friend

You're a high school has-been waiting to happen

A future gas station attendant

[Kurt]

You have a zit right there

[Veronica]

Dear diary

Why?

[Hipster dork]

Why do they hate me?

[Republican girl]

Why don’t I fight back?

[Kurt]

Why do I act like such a creep?

[Veronica]

Why?

[Martha]

Why won’t he date me?

[Ram]

Why did I hit him?

[Stoner chick, Ms. Fleming & blow-dried preppy]

Why do I cry myself to sleep?

[Veronica]

Why?

[Kids]

Somebody hug me!

Somebody fix me!

Somebody save me!

[Kids & Veronica]

Send me a sign, God!

Give me some hope, here!

Something to live for!

[Kids]

Ah! Heather, Heather, and Heather!

[Veronica]

And then there's the Heathers

They float above it all

[Kids]

I love Heather, Heather, and Heather

[Veronica]

Heather McNamara, head cheerleader

Her dad is loaded, he sells engagement rings

(I hate Heather, Heather, and Heather)

Heather Duke, runs the yearbook

No discernible personality, but her mom did pay for implants

(I want Heather, Heather, and Heather)

And Heather Chandler, the almighty

She is a mythic bitch

(I need Heather, Heather)

[Veronica]

They're solid Teflon, never bothered, never harassed

I would give anything to be like that

[Kids]

Mm

[Hipster dork]

I'd like to be their boyfriend

[Kids]

That would be beautiful

Mm

[Stoner chick]

If I sat at their table, guys would notice me

[Kids]

So beautiful

Ooh

[Martha]

I'd like them to be nicer

[Kids]

That would be beautiful

Ooh

[Beleaguered geek]

I'd like to kidnap a Heather and photograph her naked

In an abandoned warehouse and leave her tied up for the rats

[Heather Chandler]

Grow up, Heather

Bulimia is so '87

[Heather McNamara]

Maybe you should see a doctor, Heather

[Heather Duke]

Yeah, Heather, maybe I should

[Ms. Fleming]

Ah, Heather and Heather

And Heather

Perhaps you didn't hear the bell over all the vomiting

You're late for class

[Heather Chandler]

Heather wasn't feeling well

We're helping her

[Ms. Fleming]

Not without a hall pass, you're not

Week's detention

[Veronica]

Um, actually, Ms. Fleming

All four of us are out on a hall pass

Yearbook committee

[Ms. Fleming]

I see you're all listed

Hurry up and get where you're going

[Heather Chandler]

This is an excellent forgery

Who are you?

[Veronica]

Uh, Veronica Sawyer

I crave a boon

[Heather Chandler]

What boon?

[Veronica]

Um, let me sit at your table, at lunch, just once

No talking necessary

If people think that you guys tolerate me

Then they'll leave me alone

Before you answer, I also do report cards

Permission slips, and absence notes

[Heather Duke]

How about prescriptions?

[Heather Chandler]

Shut up, Heather

[Heather Duke]

Sorry, Heather

[Heather Chandler]

For a greasy little nobody, you do have good bone structure

[Heather McNamara]

And a symmetrical face

If I took a meat cleaver down the center of your skull

I'd have matching halves

That's very important

[Heather Duke]

Of course, you could stand to lose a few pounds

[Heather Chandler]

And ya know, ya know, ya know?

This could be beautiful

Mascara, maybe some lip gloss

And we're on our way

Get this girl some blush

And Heather, I need your brush

Let's make her beautiful

[Heather Duke]

Let's make her beautiful

[Heather McNamara]

Let's make her beautiful

[Heather Chandler]

Make her beautiful

Okay?

[Veronica]

Okay!

[Kurt]

Out of my way, geek!

[Beleaguered geek]

I don't want trouble

[Ram]

You're gonna die at 3 PM!

[Republicanette & New Wave Girl]

Don't you dare touch me! Get away, pervert!

[Beleaguered geek]

What did I ever do to them?

[Kids]

Who could survive this?

I can't escape this!

I think I'm dying!

[Ms. Fleming]

Who's that with Heather?

[Kids]

Whoa

Heather, Heather, Heather

[New Wave Girl]

And someone!

[Kids]

Heather, Heather, Heather

[Gowan & Coach]

And a babe!

[Kids]

Heather, Heather, Heather

[Martha]

Veronica?!

[Kids]

Veronica? Veronica? Veronica!

[Veronica]

And you know, you know, you know

(Ooh!)

Life can be beautiful

(Aah! Beautiful!)

You hope, you dream, you pray

(Ooh!)

And you get your way!

(Aah!)

Ask me how it feels

(Beautiful!)

Lookin' like hell on wheels

(Ooh!)

My God, it's beautiful!

(Aah! Beautiful!)

I might be beautiful

(Beautiful!)

And when you're beautiful

(Aah!)

[Veronica]

It's a beautiful frickin' day!

[Kids]

Heather! Heather! Heather! Veronica!

Heather! Heather! Heather! Veronica!

Veronica! Veronica! Veronica!

Veronica!

candy store:

Are we gonna have a problem?

You got a bone to pick?

You’ve come so far

Why now are you pulling on my dick?

I’d normally slap your face off

And everyone here could watch

But I'm feeling nice

Here’s some advice

Listen up, biotch!

(I like!)

Lookin’ hot

Buying stuff they cannot

(I like!)

Drinkin’ hard

Maxin’ Dad’s credit card

(I like!)

Skippin’ gym

Scaring her, Screwing him

(I like!)

Killer clothes

Kickin’ nerds in the nose!

If you lack the balls

You can go play dolls

Let your mommy fix you a snack

(Woah!)

Or you could come smoke

Pound some rum and coke

In my Porsche with the quarterback

(Woah! Woah! Woah!)

Honey, what you waiting for?

Welcome to my candy store

It’s time for you to prove

You’re not a loser anymore

Then step into my candy store

(Guys fall)

At your feet

Pay the check

Help you cheat

(All you)

Have to do

Say goodbye to Shamu

(That freak’s)

Not your friend

I can tell in the end

(If she)

Had your shot

She would leave you to rot

‘Course if you don’t care

Fine! Go braid her hair

Maybe Sesame Street is on

(Woah!)

Or forget that creep

And get in my jeep

Let’s go tear up someone’s lawn

(Woah! Woah! Woah!)

Honey, what you waiting for?

Welcome to my candy store

You just gotta prove

You’re not a pussy anymore

Then step into my candy store

You can join the team

(Or you can bitch and moan)

You can live the dream

(Or you can die alone)

You can fly with eagles

(Or if you prefer)

Keep on testing me

(And end up like her!)

Veronica, look!

Ram invited me to his homecoming party!

This proves he’s been thinking about me

(Color me stoked!)

I'm so happy!

(Woah!)

Honey, what you waiting fo-

(Shut up Heather!)

Step into my candy store!

Time for you to prove

You’re not a lame ass anymore!

Then step into my candy store!

It’s my candy store

It’s my candy!

It’s my candy store

It’s my candy!

It’s my candy store

It's my candy store!

fight for me:

holy shit!

Holy shit

Holy shit!

[Veronica]

Why when you see boys fight

Does it look so horrible

Yet, feel so right?

I shouldn't watch this crap

That’s not who I am

But with this kid

Damn

Hey, mister no-name kid

So who might you be?

And could you fight for me?

Hey, could you face the crowd?

Could you be seen with me and still act proud

Hey, could you hold my hand?

And could you carry me through no man's land

It's fine if you don't agree

But I would fight for you

If you would fight for me

Let them drive us underground

I don't care how far

You can set my broken bones

And I know CPR

Well, whoa, you can punch real good

You've lasted longer than I thought you would

So hey, mister no-name kid

If some night you're free

Wanna fight for me?

If you're still alive

I would fight for you

If you would fight for me

[Students]

Holy shit

Holy shit

Holy shit

Holy shit!

freeze your brain:

[J.D.]

I've been through ten high schools

They start to get blurry

No point in planting roots

'Cause you're gone in a hurry

My dad keeps two suitcases packed in the den

So it's only a matter of when

I don't learn the names

Don't bother with faces

All I can trust is this concrete oasis

Seems every time I'm about to despair

There's a 7-11 right there

Each store is the same

From Las Vegas to Boston

Linoleum aisles that I love

To get lost in

I pray at my altar of slush

Yeah I live for that sweet

Frozen rush

Freeze your brain

Suck on that straw

Get lost in the pain

Happiness comes

When everything numbs

Who needs cocaine?

Freeze your brain

Freeze your brain

[J.D.]

Care for a hit?

[Veronica]

Does your mommy know you eat all this crap?

[J.D.]

Not anymore

When mom was alive

We lived halfway normal

But now it's just me and my dad

We're less formal

I learned to cook pasta

I learned to pay rent

Learned the world doesn't

Owe you a cent

You're planning your future

Veronica Sawyer

You'll go to some college

And marry a lawyer

But the sky's gonna hurt

When it falls

So you better start

Building some walls

Freeze your brain

Swim in the ice

Get lost in the pain

Shut your eyes tight, till you vanish

From sight

Let nothing remain

Freeze your brain

Shatter your skull

Fight pain with more pain

Forget who you are

Unburden your load

Forget in six weeks you'll be back on

The road

When the voice in your head

Says you're better off dead

Don't open a vein

Just freeze your brain

Freeze your brain

Go on and freeze your brain

Try it

big fun:

Blast the bass, turn out the light

Ain't nobody home tonight!

[Ram]

Drink, smoke, it's all cool

Let's get naked in my pool!

[All]

Punch the wall and start a fight!

Ain't nobody home tonight!

[Kurt]

His folks got a waterbed

Come upstairs and rest your head

[Ram]

Let's rub each other's backs

While watching porn on cinemax!

[Heather chandler, kurt, ram, kids]

The folks are gone

It's time for big fun!

Big fun!

We're up till dawn

Having some big fun!

Big fun!

When mom and dad forget

To lock the liquor cabinet

It's big fun!

Big fun!

[Veronica]

Ok, ok, ok

So, it's salt, and then lime, and then shot?

[Heather mcnamara]

No, it's salt, and then

[Heather chandler]

You're doing it wrong!

[Veronica, spoken]

Really? 'Cause I feel great

[Preppy stud]

Veronica, you are looking good tonight!

[Veronica]

Whoa

A hot guy smiled at me

Without a trace of mockery!

[All but veronica]

Everyone's high as a kite

Ain't nobody home tonight!

[Veronica]

Stoned. Zoned. I should quit

Hey, is that weed? I want a hit

[All but veronica]

Fill that joint and roll it tight

Ain't nobody home tonight!

[Veronica]

Dreams are coming true

When people laugh but not at you!

I'm not alone! I'm not afraid!

I feel like bono at liveaid!

[All]

The house is ours

It's time for big fun!

Big fun!

Let's use their showers

That sounds like

Big fun!

Big fun!

Crack open one more case!

[Veronica]

I think that's what they call third base

[All]

Big fun!

Big fun!

Big fun!

[Veronica]

That actually looks like

[All]

Big fun!

Big fun!

Big fun!

[Kurt]

Alright, people, listen up!

What is westerberg gonna do to the razorbacks at Sunday's game?

[Ram]

Gonna make 'em go whee!

Whee! Whee! Whee!

[All]

Big fun!

Big fun!

[Heather duke]

Way to show maturity!

[All]

Big fun!

Big fun!

[Heather duke]

Quit it jackass, get off of me!

[All]

Big fun!

Big fun!

[Veronica]

Yo! Ram! Emergency!

I just saw some freshmen sneaking over the pool fence!

[Ram]

I hate freshmen!

Where are you little pricks?

I'm coming for you!

[Veronica]

Hey, are you okay?

[Heather duke]

I didn't need your help

[Veronica]

Aw, thanks, heather, but I don't really have to vomit right now

[All]

The party's hot, hot, hot

It's time for big fun!

Big fun!

[Kurt]

You need a jello shot!

[All]

We're having big fun!

Big fun!

[Heather chandler]

Martha dumptruck, in the flesh

[Heather duke]

Here comes the cootie squad

We should -

[Heather chandler]

Shut up, heather

[Heather duke]

Sorry, heather

[Heather mcnamara]

Look who's with her

Oh, my God!

[All three heathers]

Dang! Dang! Diggety-dang-a-dang!

Dang-dang! Diggety-dang-a-dang!

[Veronica]

I can't believe you actually came

[Martha]

It's exciting, right?

Oh, I want to say hello to ram

I brought sparkling cider

[Heather chandler]

Showing up here took some guts

Time to rip them out

[Heather duke]

Well, who's this pig remind you of?

Especially the snout

[Heather chandler]

Hah!

[All three heathers]

Dang, dang, diggety-dang-a-dang!

Dang, dang, diggety-dang-a-dang!

[Ram]

Where the hell are those freshman?

[Martha]

Hi, ram

I wasn't gonna come, but since you took the time to write that sweet note

[Ram]

What note?

Why d'you gotta be so weird all the time?

People wouldn't hate you so much if you acted normal

There's no alcohol in here! Are you trying to poison me?

[Kids]

Dang, dang, diggety-dang-a-dang

Dang, dang, diggety-dang-a-dang

Dang, dang, diggety-dang-a-dang

Diggety-dang-a-dang!

The folks are gone

It's time for big fun!

Big fun!

We're up till dawn

Having some big fun!

Big fun!

So let the speakers blow

They'll buy another stereo

Our folks got no clue

'Bout all the shit their children do

Why are they surprised?

Whenever we're unsupervised

It's big fun!

Big fun!

Big fun!

Big fun!

Big fun!

Whooo!

dead girl walking:

The demon queen of high school

Has decreed it

She says Monday, 8AM

I will be deleted

They'll hunt me down in study hall

Stuff and mount me on the wall

Thirty hours to live

How shall I spend them?

I don't have to stay and die like cattle

I could change my name and drive up to Seattle

But I don't own a motor bike

Wait, here's an option that I like

Spend these thirty hours getting' freaky

Yeah!

I need it hard

I'm a dead girl walking

I'm in your yard

I'm a dead girl walking

Before they punch my clock

I'm snappin' off your window lock

Got no time to knock

I'm a dead girl walking

Veronica?

What are you doin' in my room?

Shh

Sorry, but I really had to wake you

See, I've decided

I must ride you 'till I break you

'Cause Heather says I got to go

You're my last meal on death row

Shut your mouth

And lose them tighty whiteys

Come on!

Tonight I'm yours!

I'm your dead girl walking

Get on all fours

Kiss this dead girl walking

Let's go, you know the drill

I'm hot and pissed and on the pill

Bow down to the will of a dead girl walking

And you know, you know, you know

It's 'cause you're beautiful

You say you're numb inside

But I can't agree

So the world's unfair?

Keep it locked out there

In here it's beautiful

Let's make this beautiful!

That works for me! Nhmp-

Yeah!

Full steam ahead

Take this dead girl walking

How'd you find my address?

Let's break the bed

Rock this dead girl walking

I think you tore my mattress!

No sleep tonight for you

Better chug that Mountain Dew

Okay, okay!

Get your ass in gear

Make this whole town disappear

Okay, okay!

Slap me, pull my hair

Touch me there and there and there

But no more talking!

Love this dead girl walking

Whoa, whoa! Hey, hey!

Yeah, yeah!

Love this dead girl walking

Whoa, whoa! Hey, hey! Wait, wait!

Love this dead girl

Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!

Ouch!

Yeah!

me inside of me:

(im at max lemme know if you want the rest of the songs heh...)

I have no words.

[plaindangan]

Chihiro getting tripled team by Junko, Miu, and Celeste.

Forcing the poor boy to pump cum whilst they berate him as a pervert.

Disclaimer: R18 material! If not to your liking then please do not view!

It had been a busy week for Chihiro as all three ladies had came up to his dorm to ask him for separate requests. With Miu, he had to make a new software to go with the new nanny bot she made for herself (and keeping silent when he saw just how busty and curvy it was...and why'd it look so much like Kirumi?). For Junko, she had begged him to teach her how to hack and he ended up giving her some lessons (and praying that whatever system she wrecked wasn't anything too important). Lasty, with Celeste, it was less she needed coding help, and moreso, she requested he pose as a 'vampire maid' for the day since her usual was out (why did she have a dress that was his size...and so short too!!)

It was exhausting, and night came about at the end of it all, he just wanted to lay back and get some rest. But, that trio had other plans as he ended up answering a fervent knock at his door to see said beauties looking deviously at him. In seconds, they'd be blocking his door, locking him in.

"What's this about?" he asked cautiously, a bit afraid of getting who knows what done to him by these three. A fear that was assuaged by Junko coming right up to him and wrapping an arm over his shoulder (which had the effect of pressing the guy's head right next to her chest~)

"Relaaaax, Chihiro~ We're just here to help pay you back for all the help you've given us!!" Nodding along, Miu took Chihiro from Junko and quite blatantly shoved his face between her rack.

"What that skank said!! You should be thankful for getting such a privilege!" As for Celes, she walked up to Chihiro and stroked his chin.

"Yes, it's a just a little 'thank you' gift from us. No need to be alarmed. I assure you, that you will love what we have in store!"

...Really? Slowly, Chihiro began to relax and even smile a bit. "O-okay...so what's the gift like?

"All will be revealed soon...but first: strip~"

...Huh?

-

"God, look how thick and twitchy that rod is!! Who knew our little Chihiro is such a peeeervv!!" Junko gushed, one of her fingers going to poke, and prod at Chihiro's sensitive mushroom. Cackling at the femboy's equally sensitive moans. "Hah! He's really getting his rocks off now~ Betcha wish I would just...." leaning in closer to his member, Junko blows on it gently, "Give it a good licking, right?~" In response, the agonized Chihiro's dick twitched and was pumping out more of that slickness that had Junko erupt into even more laughter. She was currently wearing nothing but her lacey black bra and panties, relishing in Chihiro's torment.

"C'mon, lemme switch with ya Junko!! I'm telling ya a bit more time with this puppies and everything from those balls of his'll be on my chest!!! Guarantee!!" Miu begged, given her current standing. She was laying back on the bed, shirt and bra off to allow Chihiro to rest his head between those soft, sweaty, milkers Miu was proud of.

"Please, both of you lot had your turn. Besides--" Raising her hand, Celeste slapped her own ass. Her, pale, doughy, dollar sign tattooed, 'moneymakers' - an ass that was in a blood red thong and began to clap dangerously close to Chihiro's dick. "Everyone knows that our little deviant here loves a woman with some 'meat' on her behind, no? If there's anywhere he'll be dumping its on me!"

"Psssh, please, give me one minute more and I'll get him to change his tune~ Hey, Chihiro, check these tits out!"

"I already told you, your time is up!! Chihiro, sweetie, just keep looking at my 'moneybringers'~"

"S-s-so...thick~ Just let Mama Miu take away that nasty stress, Chihiro, darling~"

As for Chihiro himself? Between a gloved inventor's globes starting to jerk him off, to getting in-between a fierce match between Junko's supermodel chest and Celeste's big buns smothering said cock - his mind had long since gotten fuzzy from his reward. The only thing on his mind was cumming. Coating their boobs, their asses, their hands - and eventually their faces as he only lived in the moment to get every last bit of spunk out of his system.

A new addiction that had all four repeat this week after week.

[brigdh]

Brigdh, these are *wildly* evocative titles! I need you to know that I waffled so so much on this choice, but the one I think I need to know about the *most* is war criminals doing compensated dating.

The WIP meme!

@napneeders and @likethehotsauce also asked for this one, thank you all!

And thank you for liking the titles, but I don't think I can take any credit for them; they're just the prompts I used for inspiration. Case in point: this one! This is from when everyone was describing their favorite characters as war criminals (maybe we're still doing that? I feel like there was a peak in the term over the summer), and then someone combined that with angsty high school AUs, and voila, a bizarre combination that I somehow found incredible compelling. (Also, if you're unfamiliar with the term compensated dating, it's basically the same as a sugar baby/daddy relationship, but often with the connotation that the baby is still in high school.)

This is one where I can't really post it as finished fic because that set-up is too complicated to explain in an author's note, so you've got the whole thing below. Modern AU, Ed-focused.

Ed’s dad wasn’t around anymore. That was fine – good, actually, it was a good thing – but it turned out that the old man had paid more in rent than he’d wasted on booze. Ed should have known. His dad was a shit father and a shit husband, but he was white, and still had his high school footballer muscles, and had a way of talking to other men that made them laugh with him instead of at him. He’d never had any trouble holding down a job, no matter how often he went in late and hungover.

Ed’s mom never had a bruise on her face, these days. She never walked funny or flinched too easily. But she still wasn’t happy. She started getting home late; the few times Ed glimpsed her in daylight, there were bags under her eyes, and her mouth was pinched and thin. Ed caught her hunched over the kitchen table, writing with one of the Bic pens he brought home from school. She didn’t hear him come in, and he got close enough to read the first few lines over her shoulder before she noticed him. It was an application for the night shift at the little grocery store down the road.

“When would you sleep?” he asked.

His mom made a little sound, half snort of amusement and half exasperated sigh. “A lot of people have a second job, Ed. We should be grateful that I can work.” She smiled at him, eyes crinkled and warm. She really believed it, was the thing. All the things she said about how the world worked, and it made Ed’s instinct to shout that it wasn’t fair, wasn’t right, feel small and childish. “Besides, it’ll be temporary. Just until your father gets back.”

Ed had fucked up. He’d already known that, of course, but now there was a whole new side to how he’d fucked up.

Obviously the solution was for him to get a job, but nowhere that hired teenagers paid over minimum wage, and when Ed counted up the hours he could skip school before the social worker called the house, it didn’t add up to enough. Jack had offered to teach Ed how to pick pockets in exchange for Ed blowing him, but he suspected lifting a few wallets here and there might be fun drinking money, but it wasn’t the kind of thing that paid the rent. Ed would have to get into harder crimes to make it work, stuff with real risk if he wanted the real rewards.

Or. There was a girl who came to school every day now with designer clothes, jewelry with real stones, the newest model phone that she updated practically every month. She lived not far from Ed, and he knew none of it came from her parents. She didn’t have a lot of friends, though she’d been nice enough when they were kids. Now people whispered whore and skank when she walked by; her eyes never flickered and her fingers tap-tap-tapped on the strap of her Birkin bag.

That was Ed’s other choice. Less dangerous than crime, probably; certainly less chance of his mom finding out, since technically compensated dating wasn’t illegal. And anyway, Ed wasn’t really a virgin, so why not?

People looked at him, sometimes; he knew that. He liked it, usually. He’d been figuring out how to dress to make them look longer. When he walked home along the side of the road, sometimes a car honked at him. Not to tell him to get out of the way, but because of what they saw.

The girl with the fancy clothes, people called her needy too. Said she had no self-respect, that anyone could have her. A sick curl of recognition had squirmed in Ed’s belly. He was like that – he needed people to want him. It was like he was hungry and other people’s attention was the only thing that filled him up. It scared him: how much he needed it, the stupid things he’d done to get it. So he tried not to think about it, to stomp the craving down into the dark places of his mind where he put the things that bothered him. He could never get rid of it for long. though. He hated how weak it made him feel, how desperate.

The idea of people paying to look at him, to touch him – that didn’t sound so bad. If someone wanted to give Ed things, just because they desired him, ached for him, even loved him, maybe that would soothe the hunger in him. He could make them be the ones who needed.

In the end, it wasn’t really much of a choice at all.

[imrainfully]

(Beautiful -Heathers)

September 1st, 1989

Dear Diary: I believe I'm a good person

You know, I think there's good in everyone, but here we are first day of senior year

I look around at these kids I've known all my life and

I ask myself: What happened?

(Freak! Slut! Burnout! Bug-Eyes! Poser! Lard Ass!)

We were so tiny, happy and shiny, playing tag and getting chased

(Freak! Slut! Loser! Shortbus!)

Singing and clapping

Laughing and napping

Baking cookies, eating paste

(Bull-dyke! Stuck-up! Hunchback!)

Then we got bigger

That was the trigger

Like the Huns invading Rome

Sorry!

Welcome to my school

This ain't no high school

This is the Thunderdome

Hold your breath

And count the days

We're graduating soon

(White trash!)

College will be paradise

If I'm not dead by June!

But I know, I know, life can be beautiful

I pray, I pray for a better way

If we changed back then

We could change again

We can be beautiful

Ow!

Just not today

Hey, are you okay?

Get away, nerd

(Freak! Slut! Cripple! Homo! Homo! Homo!)

Things will get better

Soon as my letter

Comes from Harvard, Duke, or Brown

Awake from this coma

Take my diploma

Then I can blow this town

Dream of ivy-covered walls

And smoky French cafes

(Watch it!)

Fight the urge to strike a match and send this dump ablaze!

Ooops

Ram Sweeney, third year as linebacker

And eighth year of smacking lunch trays and being a huge dick!

What did you say to me skank?

Aaah, nothing!

But I know, I know, I know

Life can be beautiful

I pray, I pray

For a better way

We were kind before

We can be kind once more

We can be beautiful

Ah! Hey Martha

Hey

Martha Dumpstock

My best friend since diapers

Are we on for movie night?

Yeah, you're on Jiffy Pop detail

I rented The Princess Bride

Hohoho, again? Wait, don't you have it memorized right now?

What can I say? I'm a sucker for a happy ending

Martha Dumptruck! Wide load!

Kurt Kelly, quarterback, he is the smartest guy on the football team

Which is kind of like being the tallest dwarf

Hey! Pick that up right now!

I'm sorry, are you actually talking to me?

Yes, I am, I wanna know what gives you the right to pick on my friend?

You're a high school has-been waiting to happen, a future gas station attendant

You got a zit right there

Dear Diary

(Why~)

Why do they hate me?

Why don't I fight back?

Why do I act like such a creep?

(Why~)

Why won't he date me?

Why did I hit him?

Why do I cry myself to sleep?

(Why~!)

Students

Somebody hug me!

Somebody fix me!

Somebody save me!

Send me a sign, God!

Give me some hope here!

Something to live for!

Ah! Heather, Heather, and Heather!

And then there's the Heathers, they float above it all

I love Heather, Heather, and Heather

Heather McNamara, head cheerleader, her dad is loaded, he sells engagement rings

I hate Heather, Heather, and Heather!

Heather Duke, runs the yearbook, no discernible personality

But her mom did pay for implants

I want Heather, Heather, and Heather!

And Heather Chandler, the almighty

She is a mythic bitch

They are solid Teflon

Never bothered, never harassed

I would give anything to be like that

I'd like to be their boyfriend

That would be beautiful

If I sat at their table, guys would notice me

So beautiful

I'd like them to be nicer

That would be beautiful

I'd like to kidnap a Heather and photograph her naked in an abandoned warehouse

And leave her tied up for the rats!

Grow up, Heather, bulimia is so '87

Maybe you should see a doctor, Heather

Yeah, Heather, maybe I should

Ah, Heather and Heather and Heather

Perhaps you didn't hear the bell over all the vomiting

You're late for class

Heather wasn't feeling well, we're helping her

Not without a hall pass you're not. Week's detention

Actually, Miss Fleming, all four of us are out on a hall pass

Yearbook committee

I see you're all listed

Hurry up and get where you're going

This is an excellent forgery

Who are you?

Veronica Sawyer

I crave a boon

What boon?

Hm, let me sit at your table at lunch

Just once

No talking necessary

If people think you guys tolerate me, they'll leave me alone

Before you answer, I also do report cards, permission slips and absence notes

How about prescriptions?

Shut up, Heather

Sorry, Heather

For a greasy little nobody, you do have good bone structure

And a symmetrical face

If I took a meat cleaver down the center of your skull I'd have matching halves

That's very important

Of course, you could stand to lose a few pounds

And you know, you know, you know?

This could be beautiful

Mascara, maybe some lip gloss

And we're on our way

Get this girl some blush

And Heather, I need your brush

Let's make her beautiful

Let's make her beautiful

Let's make her beautiful

Make her beautiful

Okay?

Okay!

Out of my way geek!

I don't want trouble

You're gonna die at 3PM!

Don't you dare touch me! Get away, pervert!

What'd I ever do to them?

Who could survive this?

I can't escape this!

I think I'm dying!

Who's that with Heather?

Whoa. Heather, Heather, Heather

And someone!

Heather, Heather, Heather

And a babe!

Heather, Heather, Heather

Veronica?!

Veronica, Veronica, Veronica

And you know

You know, you know

Life can be beautiful

You hope, you dream, you pray

And you get your way!

Ask me how it feels

Looking like hell on wheels

My God, it's beautiful!

I might be beautiful

And when you're beautiful

It's a beautiful frickin' day!

Heather! Heather! Heather! Veronica!

Heather! Heather! Heather! Veronica! Veronica! Veronica! Veronica!

[my-chaos-radio-90s-list]

Take A Chance On Me - Erasure

Take This Heart - Richard Marx

Tarzan & Jane - Toy-Box

Teardrop - Massive Attack

Tearin' Up My Heart - *NSYNC

Temple Of Love - The Sisters Of Mercy

That Don't Impress Me Much - Shania Twain

That’s What Love Is For - Amy Grant

The Big L. - Roxette

The Boy Is Mine - Brandy & Monica

The First The Last Eternity - Snap!

The Flame - Fine Young Cannibals

The Girl From Ipanema - Lio

The Key, The Secret - Urban Cookie Collective

The Power - SNAP!

The Real Thing - 2 Unlimited

The Rockafeller Skank - Fatboy Slim

The Secretary - Sailor

The Show Must Go On - Queen

The Sign - Ace Of Base

There Is A Star - Pharao

There She Goes - Sixpence Non The Richer

They Don't Care About Us - Michael Jackson

Things Can Only Get Better - D:Ream

Think About The Way - Ice MC

This Beat Is Technotronic - Technotronic

This Is Your Night - Amber

Thunder - East 17

Thunderstruck - AC/DC

Time For Letting Go - Jude Cole

To Love Somebody - Jimmy Somerville

To The Moon And Back - Savage Garden

Tom’s Diner - Suzanne Vega, DNA

Tonight - New Kids On The Block

Too Blind To See It - Kym Sims

Touch Me (All Night Long) - Cathy Dennis

Tubthumping - Chumbawamba

Turn On, Tune In, Cop Out - Freak Power

-

U Can’t Touch This - M.C. Hammer

U R The Best Thing - D:Ream

United - Prince Ital Joe & Marky Mark

-

Vogue - Madonna

-

Wait - Maggie Reilly

Walking On The Milky Way - OMD

Wannabe - Spice Girls

Waterloo Sunset - Cathy Dennis

We're Going To Ibiza! - Vengaboys

Weather With You - Crowded House

What A Girl Wants - Christina Aguilera

What Do I Have To Do? - Kylie Minogue

What Is Love - Haddaway

What's A Woman - Vaya Con Dios

What's The Colour Of Love - Lili & Susie

What’s Up? - 4 Non Blondes

Wheel Of Fortune - Ace Of Base

When Do I Get To Sing 'My Way' - Sparks

When You Say Nothing At All - Alison Krauss

When You're Gone - Bryan Adams feat. Melanie C

When You Walk In The Room - Pam Tillis

Where The Streets Have No Name - Pet Shop Boys

Whiskey In The Jar - Metallica

Who Is It - Michael Jackson

Who Do You Think You Are - Spice Girls

Whose Law (Is It Anyway?) - Guru Josh

Why Does It Always Rain On Me? - Travis

Why Does My Heart Feel So Bad? - Moby

Why Can’t We Live Together - Timmy Thomas

Wish You Were Here - Rednex

Would You…? - Touch & Go

-

Yesterday, When I Was Mad - Pet Shop Boys

You - Ten Sharp

You Are Not Alone - Modern Talking

You Bring On The Sun - Londonbeat

You Don’t Fool Me - Queen

(You Drive Me) Crazy - Britney Spears

You Get What You Give - New Radicals

You Gotta Be - Des'ree

You Might Need Somebody - Shola Ama

You're In Love - Wilson Phillips

You're Makin' Me High - Toni Braxton

You’re Not Alone - Olive

You’re Still The One - Shania Twain

Young At Heart - The Bluebells

Your Woman - White Town

[optimistredsox]

24 June, TOR @ BOS, 6-7, win

Well, you couldn't fucking write that could you? Pitchers' duel turned to a potential wash-out turned to thrilling comeback turned to walk-off. All with the championship Celtics in the house to the very end to watch the Sox snag victory from the jaws of defeat. What a fucking ride. It wasn't all good. Boston had two errors and one of Toronto's runs was unearned. We were leading 2-1 in the bottom of the fourth until a catastrophic seventh saw the Jays put 5 more runs on the board. But like I said yesterday - there's a vibe at the moment. A sense that these guys are gelling in a way we hoped for when getting deliriously optimistic about the possible long shots of this season going well (especially after the avalanche of injuries we started off with). This is exciting. This is a young team with potential that seem to be getting it. So there are plenty of bright sides.

Yes, I am going to start with Arrakis native Jarren Duran, as he hit his first walk-off last night, knocking in Ceddanne Rafaela with a single in the bottom of the ninth. He had a strong night, going 3-for-5 with 2 runs scored and that RBI that happened to be the walk-off, game-winning RBI. Sox fans the planet over will probably riot if he doesn't get selected for the All-Star game. We're basically Fremen now.

Tanner Houck had a solid start, though it started coming off the rails in the beginning of the seventh. However, six and a third pitched with 7 strike outs, one walk, 5 hits and 2 earned runs (one, sadly, unearned as well), is solid. And the bullpen was leaned on heavily the last few days so a slight shimmy in their performance was probably inevitable.

Raffy Devers had a night, going 4-for-3 with a 2-out 2-run dinger in the fourth. He scored twice and knocked two in. It was pretty awesome.

Ceddane Rafaela, scorer of the winning run, managed to get on base on an infield single and managed to take second on a balk and managed to score the winning run because Jarren Duran is on fire at the moment and Ceddanne has wheels.

Dave Hamilton made an error but made up for it by hitting a two-run dinger as part of the big comeback in the bottom of the eighth. It was his only hit, but it was enough. He also made some amazing plays at short.

Masa Yoshida went 2-for-3... him finding his groove again would be pretty fucking amazeballs right now.

Chase Anderson was lights out in the eighth, keeping the Sox in the game by not letting anyone on base.

Kenley Jansen got the win. He gave up a hit and nothing else. He's having a good season. My heart no longer skips beats when he takes the mound.

We won!

We won a walk-off!

We're 7 games over .500! That's good.

The Skanks and Os have both lost a bunch recently.

We're in the Wild Card at the moment! How cool is that?!

[angelfall21]

VERONICA]: September 1st, 1989. Dear Diary.

(Music)

I believe I'm a good person, y’know,

I think there's good in everybody but here we are:

First day of senior year!

And uh… I look around at these kids that

I've known all my life and I ask myself: what happened?

[STUDENTS]: Freak, slut, burn-out, bug-eyes, poser, moron!

[VERONICA]: We were so tiny, happy and shiny,

Playing tag and getting chased.

[STUDENTS]: Freak, slut, loser, lard ass

[VERONICA]: Singing and clapping, laughing and napping, Baking cookies, eating paste.

[STUDENTS]: Redneck, stuck-up, hunchback!

[VERONICA]: Then we got bigger, that was the trigger

Like the Huns invading Rome!

(Heather and a republican girl bump into each other)

[REPUBLICAN GIRL]: Ugh!

[VERONICA]: Oh!! Sorry!!

[VERONICA]: Welcome to my school,

this ain't no high school This is the thunder dome.

Hold your breath and count the days,

We're graduating soon.

[STUDENTS]: White trash!

[VERONICA]: College will be paradise if I'm not dead by June!

(Everybody freezes)

[VERONICA]: But I know, I know, I know,  life could be beautiful. I pray, I pray, I pray, for a better way.

If we changed back then, we could change again!

We could be beautiful.

(Everybody unfreezes and dork gets tripped by Ram)

[HIPSTER DORK]: OW!

[VERONICA]: Just not today…

[VERONICA]: Hey are you okay?

[HIPSTER DORK]: Get away, nerd!

[VERONICA]: Sorry, uh…

[STUDENTS]: Freak, slut, cripple, homo, homo, homo!

[VERONICA]: Things will be better soon

as my letter comes from Harvard,

Duke, or Brown, Wake from this coma,

Take my diploma, then I can blow this town.

Dream of ivy covered walls and smokey french cafés.

[RAM]: Watch it!!

(Everybody gets lunch trays)

[VERONICA]:  Fight the urge to strike strike a match

And set this dump ablaze!

(Ram snacks Veronica’s lunch tray)

[RAM]: Ooooops!

(Everybody freezes)

[VERONICA]: Ram Sweeney,

third year as linebacker and eighth year

of smacking lunch trays… and being a huge dick!

(Everybody unfreezes)

[RAM]: What did you say to me, skank?

[VERONICA]: Ah!! Nothing!!

[VERONICA]: But I know, I know, I know, life can be beautiful.

I pray, I pray, I pray, for a better way.

We were kind before, we can be kind once more,

We could be beautiful.

(Martha walks up behind Veronica and taps her on the shoulder)

[VERONICA]: Ah!! Hey, Martha.

[MARTHA]: Hey!

[VERONICA]: Martha Dunstock - my best friend since diapers.

She’s got a huge heart, But around here thats not enough

[MARTHA]: We still on for movie night?

[VERONICA]: Yeah, you're on Jiffy Pop detail!

[MARTHA]: I rented “The Princess Bride”!

[VERONICA]: Ohohohoo, wait again?

Wait, don't you have that memorized by now?

[MARTHA]: What can I say? I'm a sucker for a happy ending.

[KURT]: MARTHA DUMPTRUCK! WIDE LOAD! HONK! HA HA!! *smacks lunch tray*

(Everybody freezes)

[VERONICA]: Kurt Kelly: Quarterback.

He is the smartest guy on the football team…

which is kind of, like being the tallest dwarf!

(Everybody unfreezes)

[KURT]: ALL RIGHT!

[VERONICA]: HEY! Pick that up, right now!

[KURT]: I'm sorry. Are you actually talking to me?

[RAM]: My buddy Kurt asked you a question.

[VERONICA]: Yes I am.

I wanna know what gives you the right to pick on my friend; You're a Highschool has-been waiting to happen… A future gas station attendant.

[KURT]: You have a zit right there.

[VERONICA]: Dear Diary! Why?

[HIPSTER DORK]: Why do they hate me?

[REPUBLICAN GIRL]:Why don't I fight back?

[KURT]: Why do I act like such a creep?

[VERONICA]: Why?

[MARTHA]: Why won't he date me?

[RAM]: Why did I hit him?

[STONER CHICK & MS. FLEMING & BLOW-DRIED PREPPY]:

Why do I cry myself to sleep?

[VERONICA]: Why?

[STUDENTS]: Somebody hug me,

Somebody fix me, somebody save me.

Give me a sign god, give me some hope here,

Something to live for!!

(All line up at entrance making a bridge with the lunch trays)

[STUDENTS]: Ahh, Heather, Heather, and Heather.

[VERONICA]: And then there's the Heathers:

They float above it all…

[STUDENTS]: I love Heather, Heather, and Heather.

(They stand in the spotlights)

[VERONICA]: Heather McNamara- Head cheerleader.

Her dad is LOADED, he sells engagement rings.

[VERONICA]: Heather Duke – Runs the yearbook.

No discernible personality but, her mom did pay for implants.

[STUDENTS]: I want Heather, Heather, and Heather.

[VERONICA]: and Heather Chandler – “the almighty” -… She is a mythic bitch.

[VERONICA]: They're solid Teflon:

Never bothered, never harassed.

I would give anything to be like that.’

[HIPSTER DORK]: I'd like to be their boyfriend.

[STUDENTS]: That would be beautiful

[STONER CHICK]: If I sat at their table,

Guys would notice me!

[STUDENTS]: So beautiful

[MARTHA]: I'd like them to be nicer.

[STUDENTS]: That would be beautiful

[BITTER GEEK]: I’d like to kidnap a Heather and photograph her naked in an abandoned warehouse and leave her tied up for the rats!

(Scene change)

[H. Duke]: *Throwing up*

[H. CHANDLER]: Grow up Heather, bulimia is so 87

[H. MCNAMARA]: Heathers right, maybe you should see a doctor, Heather

[H. Duke]: Yeah Heather, maybe I should.

[MS. FLEMING]:  Ah, Heather and Heather.

[H. Duke]: *Throwing up*

[MS. FLEMING]: And Heather.

[MS. FLEMING]: Perhaps you didn’t hear the bell over all the vomiting, you're late for class.

[H. CHANDLER]: Heather wasn’t feeling well, we’re helping her.

[MS. FLEMING]: Not without a hall pass, you’re not.

Weeks detention!

[VERONICA]: Actually, Ms Fleming…

All four of us are out on a hall pass.

For yearbook… committee.

[MS. FLEMING]: Very well, I see you're all listed…

Hurry up and get where you're going

[H. CHANDLER]: This is an excellent forgery. Who are you?

[VERONICA]: Uh… Veronica. Sawyer. I crave a boon.

[H. CHANDLER]: What boon?

Let me sit at your table at lunch, just once - no talking necessary.  If people think you tolerate me

Then maybe they'll leave me alone.

[Heathers snicker]

[VERONICA]: Wait before you guys answer,

I also do report cards, permission slips, and absence notes

[H. DUKE]: How about prescriptions?

[H. CHANDLER]: Shut up, Heather!

[H. DUKE]: Sorry, Heather.

[H. CHANDLER]: For a greasy little nobody,

You do have good bone structure.

[H. MCNAMARA]: And a symmetrical face.

If I were to put a meat cleaver down the center of your skull, I'd have matching halves… that's very important.

[H. DUKE]:Of course, you could stand to lose a few pounds.

[H. CHANDLER]: And you know, you know,

You know. This could be beautiful. Mascara,

maybe some lip gloss, and we’re on our way.

Get this girl some blush. And Heather, I need your brush!

[H. CHANDLER]: Let’s make her beautiful

[H. DUKE]: Let’s make her beautiful

[H. MCNAMARA]: Let’s make her beautiful

[H. CHANDLER]: Make her beautiful!

[H. CHANDLER]: Okay?

[VERONICA]: Okay!

(Scene change bell rings)

[KURT]: Out of my way geek!

[BITTER GEEK]: I don't want trouble -

[RAM]: You're gonna die at 3pm!

[REPUBLICANETTE & GOTH GIRL]:

Don't you dare touch me! Get away, pervert!

[BITTER GEEK]: What'd I ever do to them?

[STUDENTS]: Who could survive this?

I can't escape this!

I think I'm dying!

[MS. FLEMING]: Who’s that with Heather?

[STUDENTS]: Whoa. Heather, Heather, Heather…

[NEW WAVE GIRL]: And... someone!

[STUDENTS]: Heather, Heather, Heather...

[GOWAN & COACH]: And a babe!

[STUDENTS]: Heather, Heather, Heather...

[MARTHA]: Veronica?!

[STUDENT]: Veronica! Veronica! Veronica!!!

(Veronica runs out from entrance with her hand up)

[VERONICA]: And ya know,

ya know, ya know

life could be beautiful.

You hope, you dream, you pray,

and you get your way!

Ask me how it feels

looking like hell on wheels...

My God, it's beautiful!

[STUDENTS]: Beautiful

[VERONICA]: I might be beautiful

[STUDENTS]: Beautiful

[VERONICA]: And when you're beautiful...

It's a beautiful frickin' day! Day!!!

[STUDENTS]: Heather! Heather! Heather! Veronica! Heather! Heather! Heather!

[ALL]: Veronica! Veronica!

Veronica! Veronica! Veronica!!!

(New scene)

(Veronica writing in her diary)

[VERONICA]: Dear Diary, it’s been three weeks since I became friends with the Heathers!

[VERONICA]: Chuckles

[VERONICA]: Well I don’t think friends is exactly the right word. It’s more like the Heathers are the people I work with. And our job is to be popular and shit

(Bell rings)

[MARTHA]: Hey Veronica?

[VERONICA]: Hey!

 [MARTHA]: You really do look beautiful these days.

[VERONICA]: Awe, thank you but it’s still the same me.

[MARTHA]: Are you sure?

[VERONICA]: Oh, look I’m really sorry I missed the movie night last week. I’ve just had a lot going on.

[MARTHA]: I get that, your with the Heathers now. That’s exiting!

[H. DUKE]: Veronica! Heather says to haul ass to the table pronto!

[VERONICA]: How vary…

[H. CHANDLER]: Veronica! I need a forgery in Rams handwriting. You’ll need something to write on! Heather bend over!

[H. CHANDLER]: Hello beautiful! I’ve been watching you and thinking about some of the old days. I hope you’ll come to my homecoming party this weekend! Miss you, Ram.

[H. CHANDLER]: Oh! And put a XO after the signature.

[VERONICA]: What’s this for anyway?

[H. CHANDLER]: I just found out the Ram used to hang with Martha Dumtruck!

[VERONICA]: Well yeah, in kindergarten we all did?

[H. DUKE]: We all didn’t kiss on the kickball field!

[H. MCNAMARA]: Oh yeah that’s right I remember! Ram kissed Martha Dumtruck. It was disgusting!

[H. CHANDLER]: Perfect!

[RAM]: It would be so righteous to be in the middle of a Heather Chandler, Veronica Sawyer Sandwich.

[KURT]: Hell yeah, punch it in!

[H. CHANDLER]: Ram! Be a sweety and give this note to Martha Dumtruck for me!

[[VERONICA]: What no?!

[RAM]: Why would you talk to that lard ass?

[H. CHANDLER]: Oh don’t read it! She’s having an extra heavy flow and wanted advice from my gino!

[RAM]: Ew gross!

[VERONICA]: What are you doing?! Please don’t do this, okay?.. Not to Martha.

[H. DUKE]: What?! It will give her shower nozzle masterbation material for weeks!

[H. CHANDLER]: Shut up Heather!

[H. DUKE]: Sorry Heather!

[VERONICA]: Martha has had a thing for Ram for 12 years now okay?... This would kill her.

(Start of Candy store)

[H. CHANDLER]:

Are we gonna have a problem?

Do you got a bone to pick?

You’ve come so far,

Why now are you pulling on my dick?!

I’d normally slap your face off,

and everyone here could watch.

But I’m feeling nice. Here’s some advice.

Listen up be-yatch!

[H. DUKE & H.MCNAMARA]: I like!

[H. CHANDLER]: Lookin’ hot. Buying stuff they cannot

[the-firebird69]

I want you losers out of my house out of my apartment it's such skanks and skits and your little f****** lousy piece of s*** John remillard you're a slimeball you're sitting there aiming towards where he's going to put his bike saying you're going to do s*** out loud I heard you mumbling it later and you get arrested for it and you keep doing it your life is over you're a dead piece of s*** now I know what people are saying you have to leave I have to get you out of there and really Jason is not going to do it he said and it's full of s*** he'll do it he got him to quit the race for president all you need to do is prove it and suggest he kicks him out and say it out loud or something and then John Reema Lord will believe and blame you forever it's really never happens I believe this is terrible but he said the last part but really this is horrible this kid can't get a break without this stupid f****** retarded monkey in his face this guy is a piece of garbage he's ruining everything he doesn't do anything for anybody he doesn't have any AI at all he's not protecting David or his program he's not running it in any way he's getting his s*** kicked out of him by him didn't really help David's cause which might have helped us and really the empire is getting away with stuff because of this loser sell out and just saying oil zero I like and there's tons of them saying it what should you do get the f*** out of the limelight God damn loser there's a lot of losers like you who are dying because of you please so he's saying that to them so I'm stopping it and really I can tell you this this guy is ruining everybody this Trump guy he almost ruins society we don't want him as president and we have to stop him it's an emergency no one's going to make it but our friend is not afraid of this piece of garbage and he comes up into him every day he tells him off right to his face and nothing happens is a story called sleepy hollow and he made his torso when he wanted to put it up last night and you say it to me now he wants people to know that he's had enough of this s*** from the Max and he's going to take all their stuff we're going to be subjugated the proof is out there in Chile halfway down to the east and we go out and do the same f****** thing the first plane did 30 years ago or 40 years ago that seems stupid s*** crash eat each other our brains get pushed it put into other bodies and we end up dead

Stan

[irrelevaantidiot]

[VERONICA:] September 1st, 1989 Dear Diary: I believe I'm a good person. You know, I think that there's good in everyone, but—here we are! First day of senior year! And uh... I look around at these kids that I've known all my life and I ask myself—what happened?

[KIDS:] Freak! Slut! Burnout! Bug-eyes! Poser! Lard-ass!

[VERONICA:] We were so tiny, happy and shiny Playing tag and getting chased

[KIDS:] Freak! Slut! Loser! Shortbus!

[VERONICA:] Singing and clapping, laughing and napping Baking cookies, eating paste

[KIDS:] Bull-dyke! Stuck-up! Hunchback!

[VERONICA:] Then we got bigger, that was the trigger Like the Huns invading Rome

Oh, Sorry!

Welcome to my school, this ain't no high school: This is the Thunderdome

Hold your breath and count the days, we're graduating soon

[KIDS:] White trash!

[VERONICA:] College will be paradise, if I'm not dead by June!

But I know, I know, life can be beautiful I pray, I pray for a better way If we changed back then, we could change again We can be beautiful...

[VERONICA:] Just not today

Hey, are you okay?

[HIPSTER DORK:] Get away, nerd

[VERONICA:] Oh, okay

[KIDS:] Freak! Slut! Cripple! Homo! Homo! Homo!

[VERONICA:] Things will get better soon as my letter Comes from Harvard, Duke, or Brown Wake from this coma, take my diploma Then I can blow this town

Dream of ivy-covered walls and smoky French cafés

[RAM:] Watch it!

[VERONICA:] Fight the urge to strike a match and set this dump ablaze!

[RAM:] Oops

[VERONICA:] Ram Sweeney. Third year as linebacker and eighth year of smacking lunch trays and being a huge dick

[RAM:] What did you say to me, skank?

[VERONICA:] Aah, nothing!

[VERONICA:] But I know, I know... [KIDS:] I know, I know... [VERONICA:] Life can be beautiful [KIDS:] Beautiful [VERONICA:] I pray, I pray [KIDS:] I pray, I pray [VERONICA:] For a better way [KIDS:] For a better way [VERONICA:] We were kind before; [KIDS:] Ooh... [VERONICA:] We can be kind once more [KIDS:] Ooh... [VERONICA:] We can be beautiful... [KIDS:] Ooh... Beautiful...

[VERONICA:] Ugh!... Hey Martha

[MARTHA:] Hey

[VERONICA:] Martha Dunnstock. My best friend since diapers

[MARTHA:] We on for movie night?

[VERONICA:] Yeah, you're on Jiffy Pop detail

[MARTHA:] I rented "The Princess Bride."

[VERONICA:] Ho-ho-ho, again? Wait, don't you have it memorized by now?

[MARTHA:] What can I say? I'm a sucker for a happy ending

[KURT:] Martha Dumptruck! Wide load! Honnnnnk!

[KURT:] Hahaaa!

[VERONICA:] Kurt Kelly. Quarterback. He is the smartest guy on the football team. Which is kind of like being the tallest dwarf

[KURT:] Ha ha! Alright!

[VERONICA:] Hey! Pick that up! Right now!

[KURT:] I'm sorry, are you actually talking to me?

[VERONICA:] Yes, I am. I wanna know what gives you the right to pick on my friend. You're a high school has-been waiting to happen. A future gas station attendant

[KURT:] ...You have a zit right there...

[VERONICA:] Dear diary:

Why...

[HIPSTER DORK:] Why do they hate me?

[REPUBLICAN GIRL:] Why don't I fight back?

[KURT:] Why do I act like such a creep?

[VERONICA:] Why...

[MARTHA:] Why won't he date me?

[RAM:] Why did I hit him?

[STONER CHICK, MS. FLEMING & BLOW-DRIED PREPPY:] Why do I cry myself to sleep?

[VERONICA:] Why...

[KIDS:] Somebody hug me! Somebody fix me! Somebody save me!

[KIDS & VERONICA:] Send me a sign, God! Give me some hope, here! Something to live for!

[KIDS:] Ah! Heather, Heather, and Heather!

[VERONICA:] And then there's the Heathers. They float above it all

[KIDS:] I love Heather, Heather, and Heather

[KIDS:] I hate Heather, Heather, and Heather

[VERONICA:] Heather McNamara, head cheerleader. Her dad is loaded—he sells engagement rings

[KIDS:] I want Heather, Heather, and Heather [VERONICA:] Heather Duke, runs the yearbook. No discernible personality, but her mom did pay for implants

[KIDS:] I need Heather, Heather, and Heather

[VERONICA:] And Heather Chandler, the Almighty She is a mythic bitch

[VERONICA:] They're solid Teflon—never bothered, never harassed I would give anything to be like that

[KIDS:] Mm...

[HIPSTER DORK:] I'd like to be their boyfriend

[KIDS:] That would be beautiful... Mm...

[STONER CHICK:] If I sat at their table, guys would notice me

[KIDS:] So beautiful... Ooh...

[MARTHA:] I'd like them to be nicer

[KIDS:] That would be beautiful... Ooh...

[BELEAGUERED GEEK:] I'd like to kidnap a Heather and photograph her naked in an abandoned warehouse and leave her tied up for the rats

[HEATHER CHANDLER:] Grow up, Heather. Bulimia is so '87.

[HEATHER MCNAMARA:] Maybe you should see a doctor, Heather

[HEATHER DUKE:] Yeah, Heather. Maybe I should

[MS. FLEMING:] Ah, Heather and Heather

...and Heather. Perhaps you didn't hear the bell over all the vomiting. You're late for class

[HEATHER CHANDLER:] Heather wasn't feeling well. We're helping her

[MS. FLEMING:] Not without a hall pass, you're not. Week's detention

[VERONICA:] Um, actually, Ms. Fleming, all four of us are out on a hall pass. Yearbook committee

[MS. FLEMING:] ...I see you're all listed. Hurry up and get where you're going

[HEATHER CHANDLER:] This is an excellent forgery. Who are you?

[VERONICA:] Uh... Veronica Sawyer. I crave a boon

[HEATHER CHANDLER:] What boon?

[VERONICA:] Um. Let me sit at your table, at lunch. Just once. No talking necessary. If people think that you guys tolerate me, then they'll leave me alone...

Before you answer, I also do report cards, permission slips, and absence notes

[HEATHER DUKE:] How about prescriptions?

[HEATHER CHANDLER:] Shut up, Heather

[HEATHER DUKE:] Sorry, Heather

[HEATHER CHANDLER:] For a greasy little nobody, you do have good bone structure

[HEATHER MCNAMARA:] And a symmetrical face. If I took a meat cleaver down the center of your skull, I'd have matching halves. That's very important

[HEATHER DUKE:] Of course, you could stand to lose a few pounds

[HEATHER CHANDLER:] And ya know, ya know, ya know? This could be beautiful Mascara, maybe some lip gloss And we're on our way Get this girl some blush; And Heather, I need your brush Let's make her beautiful

[HEATHER MCNAMARA:] Let's make her beautiful...

[HEATHER DUKE:] Let's make her beautiful...

[HEATHER CHANDLER:] Make her beautiful...

Okay?

[VERONICA:] Okay!

[KURT:] Out of my way, geek!

[BELEAGUERED GEEK:] I don't want trouble..

[RAM:] You're gonna die at 3 pm!

[REPUBLICANETTE & NEW WAVE GIRL:] Don't you dare touch me! Get away, pervert!

[BELEAGUERED GEEK:] What did I ever do to them?

[KIDS:] Who could survive this? I can't escape this! I think I'm dying!

[MS. FLEMING:] Who's that with Heather?

[KIDS:] Whoa

Heather, Heather, Heather...

[NEW WAVE GIRL:] And someone!

[KIDS:] Heather, Heather, Heather...

[GOWAN & COACH:] And a babe!

[KIDS:] Heather, Heather, Heather...

[MARTHA:] Veronica?!

[KIDS:] Veronica? Veronica? Veronica?!

[VERONICA:] And you know, you know, you know Life can be beautiful ([KIDS:] Ah! Beautiful!) You hope, you dream, you pray And you get your way! Ask me how it feels ([KIDS:] Beautiful!) Lookin' like hell on wheels... My God, it's beautiful! ([KIDS:] Ah! Beautiful!) I might be beautiful... ([KIDS:] Beautiful!) And when you're beautiful... [VERONICA:] It's a beautiful frickin' day!

[KIDS:] Heather! Heather! Heather! Veronica! Heather! Heather! Heather! Veronica! Veronica! Veronica! Veronica! Veronica!

i'm surprised i haven't exceded the character limit yet

ima stroke