#we're nearing the endddd

[neurodivenport]

CHASE DAVENPORT IN EVERY ELITE FORCE EPISODE (14/15) Episode 14 - "They Grow Up So Fast"

[after-nine-at-the-oasis]

AAH okay promo time 😭😭 I can do this xd

Out here wiping my eyes and stopping screaming to watch the promo (neither of those are true - the first ain't even literal lol)

AAAAHHHHHH CARLOS YOU ARE NOT LOOKING GOOD MY GUY

A A A H

I didnt even RECOGNIZE THAT as TK's VOICE for a second 😯😯😬😭😭😭😭

But y'all the ANGST <3333 ❤️❤️❤️❤️👀👀😍😍❤️

Anyway back to being DISTRAUGHT and IN FEAR

O P E

Oh my gosh

"No one's gonna find you though"yeah that's because you didn't FREAKING TELL ANYONE WHERE YOU WERE GOING!!!!

THE K I T?????

C o n C E R N . jpg ಠ⁠_⁠ಠ

Oh no

"Looks like a pattern"?????

A SERIAL KILLER????!!?!?!!!?? 😭😭😭😭😭😭😳😳😳

AAAAHHHHH WHAT THE HECK

AAAAHHHHHH AWW CARLOS 😭😭😭

BRO LOOKS LIKE HE IS GOING T H R O U G H IT

AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH "We're not gonna find him alive, are we?" SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP S T O P P P P P EVERYBODY SHUT UP YES WE ARRRRE TK 😭😭😭😭😭💔💔💔

AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I am actually losing my mind

Y'all I just. I swear

Okay, that's the last of my last thoughts. Now it's time for the. . .

REVIEW

*Ahem* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

If you'll begrudge me a very long scream again 😌.

ANYWAY!

I absolutely LOVED this episode!! I thought it was amazing :DD. It had so much DRAMA an ANGST and it was also HILARIOUS at parts xD. I promise that's just emphasis not me highlighting the words lol. Anyway, I loved Owen's storyline, even I'm frustrated over it xD, and I LOVED Iris's :D. Plus the call was amazing xD. The one with he cliff lol. Anyway, I loved it all 🥰🥰. Now, I'm gonna try to keep this short, but we'll see what happens lol - time for the individual parts xD.

First of all - Judd, Mateo, Marjan, Paul, and Nancy. My 126 lovelies 🥰🥰🥰. I was about to just do them four but then I was like nah Nancy gotta join them. I decided to leave Tommy on her own though lol. Anyway!!! As always I loved them :DDD. I missed seeing them much he episode but it makes sense with everything else going on :/ :). Still, the all was great XD (the all did great jobs of course), and the scene at the endddd 😭😭😭😭😭💔💔💔. Oh my gosh I'm still not over that - I know it's only been like an hour and 20 minutes but still xD. I don't think I'll ever get over it lol. Also, for a second I nearly said just 20 minutes and then I remembered: oh yeah, it's 9:08 (big emphasis on the 9 but I can't capitalize a 9 unless I spell it out lol). Anyway! Gotta shout-out Nancy's acting on the cliff call XDD wonderful lol. "Live!! Live!!!!" XDDD Iconic lol. Also Judd calling Owen out was *chefs kiss* as always. Plus, he's definitely sus, so if we need anyone for anything involving that, Judd's our guy. Kind of like TELLING SOMEONE WHERE YOU'RE GOING- sorry XD. Anyway, I loved them all <33 hope to see them more soon :))). ❤️❤️❤️.

Tommy! I really liked her scene with TK :DD. It was amazing <333. Her being there for him, comforting him :')). Work mom for real <333. And we love her for it (and many other things lol) 🥰🥰. Also, she did amazing with her job as well :DD 🥰🥰. And I just have to mention her acting in the first call XD. Not that she even did much, more just what she was actually doing lol. Girl was just sitting there XD. Like barely blanker than 😌 XDDDD. Icon, lol, amazing xDD. I love her ❤️❤️❤️🥰.

Grace time :). We LOVE OUR GIRL GRACE for being so amazing working out the call :DD. And also she was just so good in that scene in general 😭 - the shock on her face, the near desperation in how fast she was talking to Carlos- MMH, wonderful <33. Anyway, she was an icon all around this episode :DDD, and of course did her job wonderfully <33 ❤️❤️❤️🥰. Amazing, love her so much :'D.

Owennnn! My man. He was wild this episode XD. Like. SIR. WHAT ARE YOU THINKING?? XDD. I mean, hey, I wasn't really, genuinely suspicious of O'Brien either - as an overall, at any time in the process sort of thing, Owen was more suspicious of him than I was XD. That was at the beginning lol. But like. STILL. SIR. You can't just go around telling FBI business XD. I just KNOW this I gonna have consequences (obviously), and bad ones xd. Not just in the case but for us, our family/characters. It's gonna be rough lol. You gotta admit though, Owen, and a lot of his scenes, were hilarious this episode XDD. It was a nice contrast to the other plot, the Iris plot, just like last week. Which is wild considering it's a nazi domestic terrorism plot xDD. Anyway lol, I'm excited to see where it's going 🥰. If more stressed, now, lol. Also despite all this I'm wondering, who did he get to play his niece in law XDD. O'Brien, lol - not that that description fits anyone else xd. But like, seriously, who? Is it just another one of the honor dogs' wife or something? Or his (O'Brien's) daughter? Or maybe he's even lying to her, and she really does think he's in there to try to get her husband/boyfriend back. Ah, idk though! Wild lol. Anyway, loved the plot, and yeah, sure, loved Owen lol. Still frustrated with him though xdd.

Now

The moment we've all been waiting for XD

TK and Carlos <3! An also Iris :). So! First let's kinda go over individual stuff. TK first!

My poor booyyyyyy 😭😭. He clearly felt so guilty for like, 80% of the episode xd. All except the call where they found Iris, pretty much, since that was the only time he was under the impression she was kidnapped (which she was but, yk xD). Just- agh 😭😭 xdd. Quick lighter note, amazing acting from TK on the cliff call XDD. Wonderful just as the other two lol, an icon <333. Anyway XDD (gosh that scene was so hilarious lol), TK having to confess going to see Iris in that first scene :((. I wish he got a chance to explain, but he and Carlos were both thinking that could've been the cause, so I don't even think he would've in that short a time. I mean, he just apologized instead of trying :'((. But also, I don't think Carlos would have cared. I don't blame him, but he was emotional and it was something they'd planned not to do, and could've caused Iris's disappearance. It sucks but it makes sense :'(. Also when TK said he wasn't hungry in he last scene I literally wasn't either 😭 xD. I was eating dinner throughout the episode and I'd just finished a bit when I set my food down to watch more intently lol. But I also felt literally a bit nauseous XDD I don't think I was full, I think it was just the drama lol - and THAT is impressive. Especially considering this has to work out lol. Anyway, TK in the last scene was absolutely heartbreaking 😭😭❤️. I really hope he didn't think Carlos's main reason for not coming home was him still being upset :'(((. But I think he probably did <33 💔. Anyway, I love him, he was great this episode xd <3333.

Now, a bit on Iris :D. AAAHHHHHHH I'm so glad she's okay :'DDD. I thought it would take a lot longer to rescue her, but this does make the most sense lol :'). Or t least, a lot of it. In hindsight, I see it XD. Anyway, it makes sense, and I didn't think she'd die or anything, but I'm so glad she's okay :'DD. But my poor girl :((((. Also, the thing about mental health is so sad 😭😭😭. Because yeah, seriously, just as I figured (I assume most of us did), they were discrediting things because of her illness. And it was making her doubt everything :'(((. She didn't deserve that 💔💔💔💔. Doesn't, is probably better <33. And I mean, given that there was no one seen coming out of that house, I cnt really blame the detective, but still :/. I mean, I can partially blame her because of the whole in the trunk, and also head injury hing, but still XD. Most people don't automatically jump to secret passages (like me - or, unlike me I suppose) lol. Anyway, I'm glad Iris is alive and physically (mentally too besides the doubting herself and no doubt the trauma from this :'((( ) okay :'DD. Besides that concussion lol. Carlos still needs that annoying little sister :'). That is not the only reason I'm glad she's alive btw XD, I'm just kinda joking. And annoying bc she teases him lol. Anyway <333. I love her :)) ❤️🥰🥰.

Now, Carlos. AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! XDD now, anyway lol. Honestly I'm more distraught than shocked xD. We all knew this was coming lol. And I know, I KNOW, that Carlos is gonna be okay (and I also know it just sounds like I'm trying to convince myself of that but like. we literally know lol xD), but it's still scary 😭😭😭. I'm still nervous as heck lol xDD. Just for how everything's gonna work out! Anyways, more organized stuff time XD. More organized as in more than just now. Anyway, poor Carlos 😭😭😭. His heartbreak in that first scene, and then like almost betrayal when TK revealed that he visited Iris - MMH, AAH 😭😭 xd. I was really hoping tarlos would actually make up, especially quickly, but no such luck 😭. I mean, they're no totally arguing, not yk xD. And there's gonna be so much going on (and much more important stuff at that) when we get Carlos back that I doubt we're gonna talk about it then either. Pro tip: get kidnapped to avoid talking to your fiance. XDD Sorry, I know, I'm evil. But it's not thaaat bad lol. I was just thinking about what I was just talking about earlier while I was a few minutes behind/late catching up on the last of the liveblogging lol, and that thought entered my head XD. Anyway lol. Side now, pretty sure this is about as long as Iris's now and I've barely gotten into the plot xD. Anyway! Let's actually talk about this episode, not the next one lol xD.

I loved seeing protective Carlos, and slightly detective Carlos (lol rhymes) this episode. Him going into shift early - we know it wasn't just anger -, going to the cliff, immediately joining Iris's rescue, carrying her out, holding her hand, standing up for her to the detective, hugging her and kissing her head when she talked about how awful it was and the mental illness side of things. Amazing <33. And then he went and did a dumb thing xdd. Whyyyy would he do that without backup 😭😭. I do remember thinking for a split second "he doesn't want the trail to go any colder" and then passing that as good and forgetting about it in the moment, but I think it was mostly just emotions, even if he did try to justify it lol xD. Also, I'm frustrated but not too mad at him for being mad at TK - he was emotional, it was gonna happen. And UGH I'm rushing this bc I worked on half of this and the end of this post for like 20 minutes and I was gonna be able to do it before midnight and then it didn't save even though my wifi was fine when I clicked save to go post it :'(((. And I am really upset about that bc I had to start from halfway through Carlos's section and I tried but I had three minutes and now it's past midnight xd. So I'mma try to get past how upset I am bc it's arbitrary, and just hurry this up. Besides I don't wanna retype all that anyway xd. This is most of it, I can't remember all of it >://. Ugh I'm really upset xd. Whatever. I'mma just pretend it doesn't bother me. OH MY FREAKING GOSH IT DID IT AGAIN. ALL OF THAT. FREAKING AGAIN. I WANT TO SCREAM TUMBLR COULD YOU PLEASE JUST W O R K!!!! U G H H H H H H H H. I want to SLEEP this has taken me an extra 40 minutes and is making me literally cry just WHY. WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME TUMBLR??? I'm literally gonna be saving every two seconds this time and then I'm going to resist chucking my phone across the room. I am going to try and act enthusiastic about this since the entire point of this is so I know what I was feeling instead of just my current rage. This is so stupid I know but whatever.

Anyway, I am so scared for the next episode 😭😭😭. Like VOEUNZUGAKSPB. I don't deserve this :'(((. But like I am so ready XDD. And also not at all lol xdd. It's gonna hurt but I will be LOVING the angst. And dying XD. I don't know how I'm gonna make it through it lol. Because it is going to be ROUGH, Carlos is gonna be going through it xdd. Also, at least they both said I love you at the end <333. That'll make it a tiny bit easier xddd. I will however still be screaming the entire time XDD. Anyway, I am SO EXCITED :DDD. And very scared XDD. Like, I know Carlos will be fine. I'm SURE (literally xD), unless the wedding promo bits (the planning) are with a ghost xD. But I can still be nervous lol. Oh, also! If I don't get to see TK hearing the news, or at LEAST TK telling the others, it is a crime <3. And homophobic <3. Jsyk <3. XDDD But honestly I need it. Anyway, back to Carlos lol! I loved him this episode, he was amazing 🥰🥰🥰. And I am so scared for him next episode xdd. I love him <333.

Overall, I loved loved loved this episode. I am looking forward to regular calls again, though. I love the drama and everything right now and I know it doesn't always leave room for regular calls, but I hope we have them again soon. Though the calm today was great lol. The CPR on the sex doll whole thing was just- amazing XD. Top notch call lol, and amazing performances xDD. Anyway, I loved the storylines this episode! Obviously the whole Iris situation, but Owen's too! Even if I am frustrated with him xD. But, still, I think it's gonna be really interesting, and I wanna see where it goes from here! Also it's hilarious XD. Like it's weird that it has but it has some really funny scenes lol. They've gotta fit it in somewhere xD. I'm cool with it this way lol. And, of course, I loved the Iris storyline :). It was awesome, and I'm so excited to see more. Anyway, I'm terrified of next week, but I'm also so excited :DD. I'm not at all ready, and I am so ready xD. I'll probably just be screaming the entire time. Anyway, I love all of them 🥰🥰❤️ <33.

So yeah! I loved this episode. I really enjoyed the storylines! I'm nervous for the next one. This has been my review of. . .

9-1-1: Lone Star, Season 4, Episode 3: Cry Wolf

What a great episode! I am so excited and also so, so scared for the next one. I'll be back next week with my review of. . .

9-1-1: Lone Star, Season 4, Episode 4: Abandoned

See you next week!

[ficsandcatsandficsandcats]

All Is Found:Anastasia!AU

Part IX – A Song Someone Sings

Fandom: The Witcher Word Count: 2,081 Rating: G Taglist: @heroics-and-heartbreak​ @whatevermonkey​ @jill-makes-art​ @mynamesoundslikesherlock​ @kemmastan​ @magic-multicolored-miracle​ @writingstudent​ @mlleecrivaine​ @coffee-and-stories​ @amirahiddleston​ @ultracolorfulnerdcollection​ @astouract​ @your-not-invisible-to-me​ @mycat-is-mylove @daydreamer-in-training a/n: A retelling of Don Bluth’s Anastasia (1997)

{prologue}{part i}{part ii}{part iii}{part iv}{part v}{part vi}{part vii}{part viii}

You closed your eyes and tried to still the frantic beating of your heart that thundered like the waves crashing on the rocks. You’d run out blindly, unsure of where to go but somehow finding your way outside. Once there your feet continued mindlessly and you followed your aimless wanderings until they took you to the oceanside of the major. You’d found a space in the craggy rocks by the ocean where you could stand, well-hidden from the revelry that went on overhead in the glittering palace. The words you’d overheard echoed in your head as you tried to make sense of them, anger ebbing away to grief and confusion.

I was doing it for the reward.

Of course he was. From the start Geralt had made it clear that financial gain was the primary motivation. But it felt cheap and painful now, after all you’d been though. Nowhere near as painful as what he’d said next.

In truth, I didn’t believe she was the princess.

The words twisted like a knife in your heart. He’d thought you were nothing all this time. Maybe that should make you happy, that he’d seemed to show affection for you without expecting the benefits of a title, but it just hurt. You’d liked feeling someone. You’d like having him treat you like you were someone. But it had been an act. An all too convincing act and now you stood on the outskirts of the palace not knowing what to say or do or who to trust. You had a possible grandmother but she was just another stranger. You felt small as you looked out to the sea, so far away from home while also realizing that you didn’t know where home was anymore. You thought you’d found it by Jaskier’s side but like the Belhaven Home and the palace, you’d lost that. And in truth it never really been yours in the first place.

It was cowardly to hide but you didn’t know what to do, allowing yourself to sink onto a rock. You felt alone but if you’d looked behind, even for a moment, you would have known that you were far from it.

-----

Marie didn’t wait for an excuse or explanation from the boy, she simply moved past him and walked out into the hallway. She passed Yennefer and the witcher, drawn by a single goal. She would meet this so-called princess, get it all over with so she couldn’t wonder or worry about the truth later on. The boy had lost her but she knew where she would go if she were feeling overwhelmed. She knew because she’d already gone there several nights throughout her stay in Cidaris, looking out across the sea and admiring its tenacity and cruelty. She wished to be so cruel, so cold-hearted as to not care who lived and died. But that would have made her a poor queen and if nothing else she could say that she fared well in that role for as long as it was hers.

Marie paused as the rocks came into sight, the flowing, dark blue fabric and shimmering capelet visible as the wind pulled it seemingly from the boulders themselves. She knew you stood between them and despite herself she felt a twinge of hope. Some things, it seemed, were unkillable after all.

She made a point to make noise as she approached and the skirt disappeared, withdrawing deeper into the rocks. Once she was within earshot Marie took a deep breath, raised herself to her full height as she had so many times over her lifetime, and looked the unknown head on.

“You may as well come out,” she said in a voice that was stronger than she felt, “That is, after all, why you’re here. Is it not?”

-----

Your hand clutched the pendant the rested on your chest. The voice didn’t sound familiar, but it didn’t sound foreign either. It sounded like a voice you may have heard in a dream or imagined what a grandmother may have sounded like, even if her words were brisk and sharply enunciated. You took a single steadying breath and then stepped out from behind the rocks.

The pair stared at each other. It was hard to look at you, much harder up close than it had been in the ballroom though you were clearly not a ghost. Marie could see the goosebumps on your exposed arms and shoulders and the smudge of makeup that you’d wiped away from your eyes.

“So,” she said, voice a little softer because after all this was a scared child and even if you weren’t her granddaughter, you were someone’s, “I’m told that you are the lost princess.”

“I’m told the same,” you said, voice wavering a little as you looked at the woman in front of you. She was everything you thought a queen should be. She was tall and stood upright and though her hair had gone grey and her eyes spoke to a lifetime of pain and experience she gave off a sense of being utterly in control. The crown on her head was a brazen, unrelenting reference to her role in Toussaint and a final act of rebellion against Nilfgaard. You immediately admired her, but you did not remember her.

“I assume you overheard what the Pankratz boy said?” the queen said. You swallowed hard but, inspired by her regal bearing, you drew yourself up to full height as well and forced yourself to speak.

“I did. And I want you to know that if I’d thought it was a lie, even for a moment, I wouldn’t have come,” you said, desperate for her to know that you meant her no harm. It felt vital that this woman know you would never hurt her, not even if it meant risking yourself pain.

“I believe you,” the woman said with a shadow of a smile flickering over her face for just a moment, “But you do believe you are the princess, then? Which means you believe I am your…”

She couldn’t make herself say it. She’d only ever been one person’s grandmother, one of the few titles she actually gave a shit about. You caught her meaning and nodded.

“I should tell you now that I don’t remember you,” you said, “I know he told you everything I could say, probably more convincingly, but if they were hoping that us meeting would trigger some sudden revelation I’m sorry to disappoint.”

Marie moved in closer and you started, but did not move away, letting her get so close she could see the curve of your nose and the flecks of color in your irises and the little tuft of hair by your ear that never did lay straight. She wordlessly raised a hand and pressed it down, a genuine smile alighting her face when it stuck back up stubbornly. She then glanced down to the pendant around your neck and the smile froze. You followed her gaze and moved to take the chain off without a second thought. You handed it to her and then realized what you’d done, a moment of panic before you felt an odd sense of ease. When she held it you didn’t feel scared that she’d take it or like you were losing the one thing you had tying you to your family. Surely that meant something. Surely that had to count for something.

“Do you… you probably don’t remember when I gave this to you,” Marie said, looking up to your eyes for confirmation and you shook your head.

“You were so excited,” she continued, “It was our last tea together before the party. Our last tea together forever. I wish I’d known. I would’ve… well… there’s no point to that line of thinking. There are so many things I would do over if given the chance but we don’t live in that world, do we?”

You shook your head no and swallowed hard.

“The pendant was a promise, as I’m sure you’ve read and understood. How strange to see it here again, of all places. I showed you how to wind the music box and you were delighted to watch your parents dancing. And when I told you that you would be coming to Cidaris with me within the month-”

“The week,” you corrected, surprising yourself as you did.

“What?”

“You said it would be within the week.”

Your eyes were trained on her hands that still held the chain, the pendant’s words visible and nestled in her leathery palm.

“You said my parents had business to take care of and I didn’t care, didn’t think about what they’d be doing or worry about being apart from them. I was so excited. I wanted to have an adventure so badly and it felt right that you were the one to take me. They always said I was just like you, when you were younger.”

You reached out and gently caressed the pendant and Marie’s hand clasped over yours, the pendant pressed between your hands. When you looked up into her eyes there were tears in them, a strange sight in a face that had seemed so impassive just moments before. Her other hand rose shakily to your face and you were surprised when she wiped tears away, unaware you were crying until that moment.

“Y/N? Y/N is it truly you?” she asked.

“Oh fuck,” you breathed, “I think it is. I mean – I think I am.”

She was fiercely strong, far stronger than you every expected someone her age to be, her arms pulling you against her so tightly you feared you would hurt her but she only clung to you tighter and you instinctively returned the gesture. She clasped the back of your head with one hand and gently rocked you where you stood, muscle memory taking over as she held you in your arms. Bigger now, bigger than she’d ever held you before, but the eyes that wept into her shoulder were the same eyes she’d gazed into when you were an infant and a small child. The eyes, wide and afraid and confused, that she’d looked into before losing you forever. But even forever had an end.

You clenched a fistful of her gown, ornaments digging into your skin painfully, and the more tenderly she stroked your hair or murmured your name, repeating it over and over like a song, the harder you cried. When you imagined finding your family you’d pictured embraces and tears but the fear you felt was new, and the sensation that you were travelling through time. You felt certain if you opened your eyes you would be a little girl, clutching a necklace and excitedly babbling about packing and ships. When you did open them you saw only the sea through the mist of her grey hair that obscured your view and you felt it. You felt it so fiercely, so certainly, that it nearly left you breathless. As your grandmother held you in her arms, you felt that you’d come home.

-----

Stregobor watched from the depths, obscured by a simple illusion. It was a touching scene, the reunion of Marie Thyssen and Y/N Y/LN. He could have done it then but something held him back. Perhaps patience, perhaps a streak of spite that told him if he killed you now, the dowager queen would simply walk into the sea, but he had plans for her. He would not let the woman who had ruined his victory end her own suffering, and more to the point he would not let a bargaining chip be wasted so quickly. He listened until they walked out of view.

‘We have much to discuss, you will stay with me in my room. Gods knows there’s enough room.’

‘I-I don’t know if I’m ready to meet the rest of the family…’

‘Oh no, I’m keeping you all to myself for now. Never worry, dearest, I won’t fail you twice.’

‘You didn’t f…’

Their words were lost in the wind and a sharp smile carved its way across Stregobor’s face. Let them have a few hours. Let them fall into a peaceful sleep. He turned back to the hidden door and let himself in, back into the inner walls of the palace which he’d grown to know like the back of his hand. Y/N would fall asleep a princess but she would not wake to see the day as one.  

[perfectlyrose]

Up In Flames (9/10)

Summary: In the year since they decided to become a team, John Smith and Rose Tyler have made quite the names for themselves as Team TARDIS, bank robbers extraordinaire. Newspapers the world over run headlines about The Doctor and the Bad Wolf and their latest heists. They’re practically unstoppable.

Then their world spins to a halt with a phone call. Jack’s in trouble again and a formidable enemy from John’s past has emerged from the shadows to try and destroy the bank robbing couple once and for all. Will they be able to survive this new threat intact or will the life they’ve been building together go up in flames?

A sequel to Watch it Burn, a Nine/Rose bank robbers AU

Note: just the epilogue left to go! it’s already written and i’ll get it posted in the next few days!

Word Count: 2075

Rating: Teen

Read here: tumblr // ao3 // tsp // ff

By the time they reached Rose’s flat, John felt as though he was moving through molasses. Heightened emotions mixed with a lack of sleep and being on the wrong side of an adrenaline rush conspired with the ache of his injuries to weigh him down.

Nerves buzzed through him, though, keeping him alert. Rose hadn’t said a word since they left the Master’s stronghold and the silence was stretching between them, growing brittle.

Rose locked the door of the flat behind them and leaned back against the door, eyes closed.

She took a deep breath but didn’t open her eyes. “Go put on the kettle,” she said. “I’m going to go dig some paracetamol out of my bag. There should be a bag of frozen peas in the back of the freezer you can use as an icepack.”

“Rose,” he started, not entirely sure what he wanted to say but needing to say something.

She held up a hand and opened her eyes to pin him with an inscrutable look. “Not yet. Let’s get tea and medicine first then we can talk.”

She pushed off the door and made for her bedroom, leaving John standing in the middle of the sitting room staring after her. He swallowed hard then shuffled towards the kitchen to put the kettle on, as directed.

He was in the middle of pouring the boiling water over the teabags when Rose came in. She put the bottle of paracetamol on the counter next to the mugs and stepped around him to rummage in the freezer. She pulled out the bag of frozen peas she’d mentioned and handed it to him.

“Your ribs probably need ice and I don’t have proper ice packs.” Rose’s eyes flickered to his jaw and he figured he probably had a bruise rising there as well.

“Frozen peas are better than any ice pack,” he said. He didn’t question her knowing that his ribs were throbbing, she’d felt him flinch earlier when she’d hugged him. He pressed the bag against his side, wincing at the cold.

“Go sit, I’ll finish the tea.”

“I can help. Not a complete invalid, me.”

“Go, John.” She said. Her hands shook as she took out the teabags. “Please.”

John acquiesced with a nod he wasn’t entirely sure she saw. He took the bottle of paracetamol with him.

He sat on the same end of the sofa he’d occupied while he and Rose had devised a plan he hadn’t followed. He shook a couple of pills into his palm and popped them into his mouth, dryswallowing them. His eyes fell on the detritus of the plan still scattered across the coffee table as he put the bottle down.. He leaned closer, wincing as his ribs protested. This wasn’t the plan as he’d last seen it - it was the plan she’d hatched to save him.

Elements of her original plan had been cannibalized into this one and seeing everything laid out like this took his breath away. It was incredibly complex, contained numerous moving parts and required flawless timing.  It was amazing that she had come up it in so short a time and that it had worked so flawlessly.

“Had to come up with something on the fly since you went off on your own and got captured,” Rose said.

John jumped, not having heard her walk into the room. “It’s a brilliant plan.”

She shrugged and set down the two mugs of tea on top of the paper-laden table. She settled herself on the other end of the sofa from him and picked up her mug.

The two feet of space between them felt like a chasm.

“I’m sorry, Rose,” he said after the silence stretched too far for his frayed nerves. “I wasn’t thinking-”

“But you were thinking, that’s the problem,” Rose cut in, eyes flashing. “You thought up your own plan and didn’t say a word to me.”

“I was wrong,” John said, leaning towards her slightly. “I was scared and it made me stupid. Koschei always liked to destroy things just because someone else liked them and I was terrified that he would get his hands on you.”

“So you tried to cut me out.”

“I tried to keep you safe,” he amended. “I knew you wouldn’t like it and I still did it because I couldn’t handle the thought of you not being safe. Taking him down wasn’t worth it if he hurt you.” He took a deep breath, let it out. “If I could keep you safe, I would let everything else burn to do it.”

“You can’t wrap me up in cotton wool and tuck me away, John. I’m not fragile and you don’t to get to make these decisions for me,” Rose said.

“I know.”

“Do you? Or are you going to do this again if things get sticky? We keep each other safe by staying together, by having each other’s backs.”

“Rose, I am never going to do anything like this ever again,” he swore.

Rose closed her eyes, pressing her lips together as she tried to compose herself. She clutched  her almost empty tea mug tighter and brought her gaze up to meet his. “How can I know that you mean that, John? I didn’t think you would do it this time.”

Her voice wavered and John felt his heart crack.

“Do you know how worried I was when I found your note and realized what you had done? When I realized that the fact that you weren’t already back meant that the Master had you? I wasn’t mad at you, I was terrified that I’d lost you.”

She paused, letting it sink in. “Did you think about how you would feel if you found a note like that from me?”

He shook his head mutely, unable to speak through the lump in his throat. He didn’t have words even if he could speak.

“I didn’t think so.”

“I’m so sorry, Rose,” he rasped out.

“I know you are, but you made me feel like you don’t trust me. I can’t do this again, John. I can’t keep letting you cut me to pieces like this.”

John couldn’t stay apart from her, not when she was hurting and he at least had a hope of making it better. He closed the distance between them and carefully took the tea mug from her hands. He set it on the table and then took her hands in his.

“I do trust you, Rose. I’m sorry I made you feel like I don’t. I know how important trust is to you and I still trampled on it. What can I do to make this up to you?”

“I don’t know. I’m not sure it’s something we can fix right away.”

He squeezed her hands. “I’m willing to put in however much time and effort is required, so long as you let me try. Just let me try to put things to rights with us. Please.”

Rose looked puzzled for a moment, then she smiled at him, a quavering thing packed full of emotions. “You daft man. You think that I’m going to send you packing? I’m not letting you out of my sight after the stunt you pulled.”

“Thank god for that,” he breathed, pulling her into a hug.

They melted into each other. John let out a breath, feeling like a weight had been taken off his chest.

“You know, I thought this conversation would involve a lot more yelling than it has,” he said, nuzzling into the side of her neck.

“I thought it would too,” she admitted, “but I am just so relieved that you’re alright. I was so worried and scared and I don’t think it’s all gone yet. I still feel hollow, somehow.”

“I’m here,” he reassured her. He pulled back so he could cup her face in her hands. “I’m here and you saved me and we’re going to work things out.”

“Best possible outcome,” she said with a smile. “I reserve the right to yell at you later, still, though.”

“You can yell at me all you want,” he promised.

She tilted forward and pressed her lips to his. He welcomed her in, letting her lead the kiss wherever she wanted. For his part, he just tried to pour everything he felt for her into it and hoped she understood.

She deserved more than just his hope, though. They’d had too many miscommunications already, he didn’t want this to be another on the list.

He eased back from the kiss.

“I love you,” he whispered into the small space between their lips.

Rose surged forward and kissed him hard. She pulled back to look at him, eyes shining. “I love you, too. Only took us almost getting ourselves killed to finally say it.”

“It’s a solid motivator,” he said with a grin.

“Let’s not wait for the next near-death experience to say it again.”

“Your wish, my command,” he said, leaning forward to gently brush his lips over hers. “I love you.” He kissed her again, longer this time but still achingly soft. “I love you.”

“I love you so much,” she whispered when she finally could speak again.

“I don’t know how I got so lucky,” he said. “Especially now that you know.”

The spectre of their pasts, dragged into the present by the Master, made her sit back far enough to look at him properly.

“Knowing what made you into who you are doesn’t change who you are,” Rose said. She reached up and cupped his cheek, thumb catching on his stubble as she brushed it across his skin in a soft caress. She was careful to avoid the bruise on his jaw. “And I love who you are. I love all of you, John, not just the good parts.”

He turned his face and pressed a kiss into her palm, too overcome to say anything.

“I’m sorry he dredged all of this up when you weren’t ready,” she said.

“I’m sorry he went digging around in your past too,” John replied, voice rough.

Rose shrugged but the lingering distress in her eyes belied the nonchalant gesture. “He barely scratched the surface of my past. Most of it’s not on any record, public or otherwise, so he wouldn’t be able to find it.”

“Still, it wasn’t his story to tell.”

“No, it wasn’t. But I do want to tell you, John. Just not tonight. I think we’ve had enough of the bad tonight. I vote we leave our pasts buried for just a bit longer.”

“Not too much longer,” John decided. “I think I’m ready to tell you about what I’ve done. No more secrets. They’re not doing us any good.”

“No more secrets,” she agreed. “And no more dishonesty between us.”

“No more.”

They sealed the promise with a kiss.

“Let’s go to bed,” Rose whispered. “I’m not quite tired enough to sleep on this couch but it’s a close thing. I was looking forward to makeup sex but it’s going to have to wait.”

John chuckled. “We’ll finish making up tomorrow and you can yell at me and then we can jump each other.”

“Hey, I’m supposed to be the one with the plans around here,” Rose teased.

“I will defer to any changes you wish to make.”

“Suck up.”

He raised his eyebrows and she flushed.

“I’ll meet you in the bedroom,” he said, standing up. He snagged the half defrosted bag of peas from where they’d ended up on the floor. “Gotta put these away.”

“I want a full account of your injuries and what happened to you later, too,” she said. The last few words she said were obscured by a yawn.

“Bed.”

“Hurry up and put the peas away and join me.”

Rose had already slipped into her pajama shirt when John entered the room. She crawled into bed and wriggled under the covers.

John joined her as soon as he’d stripped down to his pants. He turned off the lamp and curled around her, tucking her into his body.

His heart settled, at peace here in this quiet moment with the woman he loved.

The last thing Rose heard before drifting off to sleep was John quietly telling her again that he loved her.

He was still there when she woke up in the morning, the same words on his lips. She whispered them back before kissing him hello.