#we're all good the appointment is just checking a skin spot or two :)

[council-of-the-void]

Well we got to our appointment over an hour early (didnt want to get lost on our way to it) and we now have a buttload of time to do things online while we sit in this hospital cafe

- Melantha (and Mae)

[pbandjesse]

I think I was a little more tired then I expected and I had a little cry at the end of the day. But it was a good day and I had fun.

I slept pretty well last night. I did stay up for a little while. Did the dishes. But I didn't read for long. James held me and I played on my phone and fell asleep. I woke up at 1 to feed Sylvia. And went back to sleep until my alarm went off at 8. I had a follow up OB appointment so there wasn't time to lollygag.

I got dressed. It was raining and cold this morning. I made sure I grabbed a hoodie for Sylvia too. I did not want her to be cold. Like in the car we put a blanket on her but when we were out and about. James was feeding her on the couch and asked if we should load up the car now too for going to camp. And I decided that we weren't going to have time and we could do it when we got back home.

We got to the office I passed baby to James to hold while I went back to get checked out.

The RN was slightly concerned about my skin and I told her I am getting my injections on Monday so hopefully that clears things up. She also gave me a new prescription to hopefully help speed up some healing. But she said everything looked good and I was going in the right direction.

We all went home after that. We had two hours until we had to leave. Sylvia fell asleep on the studio couch and I joined her in chilling there. James brought their laptop in to do some work. And we all just enjoyed the morning. I had a muffin. It was a good day.

We weren't able to get a spot out from so James had had to park on the other street. And when it was time to load the car they just put the flashers on so we could just do it quickly.

We got Sylvia loaded up. Packed two bottles. And we're off.

I was looking forward to seeing everyone and getting into setting up for the music festival tomorrow. And it would be a lot of stuff! There was some sitting and waiting but mostly for the next four hours it was go go go.

We parked up at the art building and I took Sylvia to the office and dropped her off with Elizabeth who fed her while we went to set up. I had to come back to the office twice to get clarification from Heather on some table stuff. But we would figure it all out. James got my tent set up and while they worked on moving some tables I would set mine up.

It took me a little to be happy with the display but I am happy with it. I would still like to fix my one sticker display because the hinge broke on the back so it can't stand up anymore

But that's alright. It can be flat for this event. I also wanted to make some hanging signage but didn't get around to that so instead I hung my bear pennent and a few of my most favorite bears as the display and honestly I love it.

I have decided to give myself a making goal for the season. I want to try and make 5 bears a week. Like that seems like a reasonable goal. It's the cutting them out that I don't love so I may have to bank some cutting on days I have motivation. Or even use my new sewing club hours to do that part. We will see what happens.

I didn't have a lot of vendors come and set up today. Two in the field with me. And then two over at the food area. Out of 30 total vendors. So tomorrow is going to be a lot of logistical scariness. But we'll figure it out. I am really excited. But also that was difficult.

James and Sylvia were chilling. Hanging at the office. James's allergies were bothering them and they were real sneezy. But soon there was pizza and I was happy to eat something.

Sylvia was awake and looking around and being a sweet little girl. She's really the best. I am very lucky and have the best baby. And the best husband who supports me and my goals and dreams.

But that's been really hard for me to accept. I am having a bit of trouble accepting that James wants to be there. Wants to hang out and help and be my number one employee. So I internalized that and was like. Well obviously I can't have to much fun because James isn't having fun. Even though they are telling me they want to be there. It is hard to wrap my head around it and makes it hard to enjoy things. I know it's a me problem and it's something I'm working on.

James would go for a very long walk all around camp with Sylvia. Showing her places they love. And while they did that I talked to the other vendor who was setting up and chatted with Nick and Noah. I also realized there were some excellent mushrooms from the recent rain and spent a good amount of time looking for them and photographing them. And that raised my spirits just enough.

We had some logistical things to work out and I spent some time chatting with Heather. There was some issues with permits for food vendors. Again. Last year the health department showed up. So Alexi and Heather had to do some running around to make sure the vendors were solid. Kind of rude for the city to wait until less then 24 hours before the event but alas.

I was setting up a small table and got my finger pinched really hard and got a blood blister that ended up actually bleeding and hurt a lot. I also slipped down the hill and hurt my wrist. On the same hand of course. I was just killing it. But I was still having a good time and was happy to be there.

The sun would come out. And I helped with some signage and checked in about map stuff and a few things I thought of that needed to get done. I had taken Sylvia for a bit. She was awake and looking and smiling and it was so lovely. She's such a great little kid.

Heather asked me to set up camp's merch table. So I went to do that. The table cover looked terrible so James went and got a better table cloth from the office and I had a much better time after that. I didn't have anywhere to our Sylvia while I was doing this so I just. Put a towel on the ground. And put her on that. Like it was basically like putting a blanket down. It was kind of silly but she was happily laying there watching the trees sway in the wind. When she made sounds I would go "oh yeah??" It was sweet.

James drove the gator up with the merch to set up. First time they have driven the gator in a decade. Cutie. And we got everything set up. James took Sylvia to get changed and once we were done setting things out they would go feed her while I did a final check in before we went home.

We were all kind of tired. When we got back here I spent some time putting together a bag for Sylvia tomorrow. Diapers. Change of clothes. Sweater. Ear protection. Toy. Socks. Fan. We are also going to bring so many bottles. This will be the longest we have ever been out of the house with her. And we will be there past her official new bedtime. I told James that if she couldn't hang and they had to bail with her I can find a ride back home. And it's not ideal but we will make it work.

Sylvia was asleep in her robot chair so James was able to do some stuff in the kitchen and I was able to work on the studio. I got some glue from the craft lodge and got all my pieces of my applique glue basted down. And I set up my walking foot to start sewing down the pieces. I need to figure out how to be neater with that foot for sure. I am trying! But I just don't feel like I have great control.

I decided to let the glue dry and would work on sewing it later. I laid down on the papasan. James made me a salad. And came to see how I was and I told them I was sad and then I cried for a while. They talked to me and tried to help me work through my feelings. They want to live a Jesse centric life. They like that life. Even if they are depressed and miserable. They want to do things that make me happy and bring me joy. Because in a way it brings them fulfillment. I just wish it also made them happy, you know? I want my husband to be happy and it's so hard when they are struggling with depression. We are quite a pair. But regardless of the depression, the love is there.

Sylvia had her 6-7 cry. A pattern emerges. But once she was calm and happy again everything was better. I took a shower and then got her bath ready.

It's so funny how blonde she is when you wash her hair. It's like gold. I am curious if it will turn a mousey brown or get real dark like mine. I do love saying "who the hell's little blonde baby is that" ala Kat Williams "who the hell's white baby is that" and make myself laugh every time.

Now we are all tired. And getting ready for a very big day tomorrow. We will arrive at camp at 8am. And we won't leave until almost 9pm. And like I really hope it's just a great day. I have my hammock in the car if we need it. There should be good music and food and friends. I am really hoping for a wonderful time.

So wish us luck. I love you all. Goodnight!

[kashi-prompts]

Rating: T

Pairing: Kakashi x Reader

Genre: Fluff. Teeth rotting fluff.

"It's stifling in here," the silver-haired Hokage managed, slipping a finger under his mask to let the air hit his face. He took a deep breath, trying to relax the gnawing feeling in the pit of his stomach.

"Kakashi," Gai stood from the wooden chairs before the Hokage's desk, "relax, my friend. I've never seen you so tense."

"I'm not tense," Kakashi brushed off Gai's hard reassuring pat on the back.

"The crease between your eyes has never been so prominent," Gai poked his friend's forehead, stopping him. Kakashi sighed heavily, meeting Gai's gaze.

"I'm fine," he reassured his friend.

"Having second thoughts?" Gai nudged him.

Kakashi looked at his friend and pushed past him to walk to his desk, "no, never. Are my robes here yet?"

"Then what is it?" Guy followed him, watching him as he shuffled papers around on his desk, "We're so young; how could anything bother you on your wedding day?"

"I'm not bothered," Kakashi turned, looking at his oldest friend, giving him a reassuring promise. "Just a little nervous."

The silver-haired shinobi turned Hokage had never felt this way before. His chest swirled with tightness, and his mind raced from thought to thought. The whole village had its eyes on him and [y/n] today. Every gaze would be turned to their marriage, the Hokage and his new wife.

Gai slapped Kakashi on the back again, smiling broadly, "I'm happy for you, my old friend. You're a lucky one."

Kakashi laughed nervously, his fingers pushing the hair at the nape of his neck down. He still hadn't gotten used to the missing thicker locks that had been cut off earlier in the week. His mind traveled to his bride, dreamily manifesting the image of what she would look like walking towards him. He felt his chest tighten more, exhaling shakily.

"Your haori is ready," Yamato came through the office door, towing the Hokage's formal attire behind him carefully. Kakashi nodded, realizing the ceremony would be beginning shortly. He turned to the window behind his desk, looking down at the ceremony space designated for his wedding behind the Hokage's manor. Guests were trickling in one by one, all being greeted by Iruka, whom he had appointed.

"Perfect!" Gai exclaimed, grabbing the attire from Yamato's grasp, "let's get this party ROLLING!"

The sunlight was overbearing on his back as he made his way down the steps towards the ceremony space. His haori fit nicely, but the black, heavy material felt like two weights on his shoulders. He smiled at the guests, greeting the other Kage's respectively. Each congratulated him and encouraged him to not worry about hosting duties on his big day.

Kakashi looked around, taking in the surroundings for a moment as he adjusted his sleeves. Then, he thought of the day he asked y/n to marry him. Sitting quietly under a tree, her head had leaned against his shoulder, dozing off after their rather long walk to their favorite quiet spot on the outskirts of Konoha.

The wisteria blossoms had been in full bloom, dangling above them to create a sea of lavender-colored petals. He had taken her hand as she rested, silently and covertly slipping a ring on her finger with his shaking, cold hands. She hadn't budged at his movements, her breath shallow against the side of his neck.

"I love you," he had whispered against the shell of her ear, "and I want to spend the rest of my life with you."

Her eyes had fluttered open in surprise, dazed by his words. His fingers had grasped her hand gently and pulled them to his lips, kissing the tip of her ring finger with a tender, fervent gaze. When the realization had hit her, her arms had flown around him, pulling him close to her with a shower of kisses and affectionate affirmations following.

Looking back, the thought enveloped him in a warmth that wasn't from the sun casting down.

"Kakashi," Iruka called out, a smile stretched across his lips as he checked his watch, "all the guests have arrived."

"Good," Kakashi nodded, "I guess that means we're almost ready."

"Yes," Iruka smiled again eagerly. He hesitated for a moment and then leaned in, his voice just above a whisper. "It's time to go get your bride."

Kakashi looked over quickly at Iruka, his eyes glistening with excitement and nervousness. Iruka raised his eyebrows, urging the Hokage to go meet his future wife.

*****

You stood in your kimono, flattening the white fabric out nervously at your waist. Your hands felt clammy, and your heart thumped uncomfortably in your chest. Glancing at the clock, you couldn't help but think of the moments that ticked by that brought you closer to being Kakashi's wife.

Reaching up, you traced your eyelashes with the back of your finger, feeling the moisture from your eyes lying modestly between them. The emotions in your chest were overwhelming you, threatening to burst at any second. The joy consumed you as you inhaled heavily, feeling your lungs expand before letting out a shaky breath.

At one last glance, you looked at yourself in the mirror. Your eyes fluttered from the ornate flower in your hair, the rouge on your cheeks down to the bouquet you held at your waist. So this was really happening, you thought.

The sound of a gentle knock on the door caused your heart to skip into your throat. You turned, watching the handle turn quietly before opening a crack.

"[y/n]?" you heard Kakashi's hesitant yet soft voice from behind the opening.

"Yes?" you asked, unsure as to why. You had been waiting for him - for this moment when he would open the door and see you for the first time in your wedding dress. Your heart quivered in your ribcage.

"Can I come in?" he asked quietly, the smile evident in his voice.

"Yes," you replied, your voice exuding like a content sigh.

He didn't swing the door open like some men would, eager to see their bride and get down the aisle. Some men would never even think to knock, knowing full well that what was behind that door was theirs. But the Hokage was different, gentle in more ways than one, yet fiercely protective of what was his.

You hadn't realized you had been holding your breath as you watched him open the door. The sight of his slender fingers tenderly gripping the knob was all you could focus on for a moment, the overwhelming excitement and nervousness engrossing every cell in your body.

But when you finally looked up at him, your eyes catching his, everything felt peaceful. Nothing else mattered except for the gentle upturn of his eyebrows and the soft slope of his lips that curled into a smile. The recognition of his uncovered expression that you only saw intimately sent an electric shock through your body.

The distance between you both disappeared almost immediately. You felt the dance of his fingertips curve around your waist, pulling you close to him as you stifled a giggle of excitement that quickly turned into tears of delight. Tears brimmed at your eyes as you hugged him close, feeling his steady body against your chest and his fingertips spread between the skin of your shoulder blades. Nothing mattered at that moment.

"You look so beautiful," you felt his lips brush against your ear. You smiled against his jaw, feeling the soft prickle of his skin and the scent of his aftershave fill your senses.

"I wasn't expecting you to not wear your mask," you whisper into his neck as your hands hung lazily around his body. But, instead, you felt his hands gently grasp your shoulders, pulling you away to look at you. Your eyes scanned his face, the small mole on his chin resurrecting the smile you couldn't quite tame.

"I figured you'll be my wife shortly, so you should certainly get used to it," he lifted his finger and traced the curve of your own jaw, the feeling of his rough index finger traveling across your skin sent an electric shock through you. You felt heat erupt within you, and by the firm look he gave you, he had felt it too.

"Will you not be wearing it during the ceremony?" You asked hopefully.

He chuckled, pulling you back into his chest. You felt the echo of his laugh reverberate against you.

That was a no.

*****

The surreal environment you walked into with your fiance on your arm felt like you had been transported into a far-off dream you had had many months ago. The realization that all of your planning and praying for things to singularly come together to this moment overwhelmed your senses.

You looked down the aisle at Kakashi, his mask returned to cover his sharp features. Yet, a part of you didn't mind. It was the familiar face you had fallen in love with. You could see the shadow of a grin under the fabric of his face as you walked towards him. Sakura blossoms bobbed all around you, whispering in the breeze that swept his short hair to the side even more.

Once you reached him, you could see the outline of red around his eyes. The man who never showed his emotions in public unless absolutely necessary couldn't help but be overcome with passion at the sight of his bride. You reached for his hand, feeling the clamminess of his skin as you threaded your fingers through his. You smiled at him, and he leaned over to plant a soft kiss on your temple.

****

"You may kiss your bride," was all you heard as the ceremony ended. You looked up at him, delirious with joy as he smiled down at you, his wife. You narrowed your eyebrows when he didn't immediately press his lips to yours at the reader's consent. He waved your maid of honor over, pointing to your bouquet that she held for you.

"This?" your maid of honor asked, holding up the floral arrangement. He nodded, taking it from her as your attendees continued to cheer. You took it from her and looked back at him, puzzled by his strange request.

But when he pulled your wrist up to cover both of your faces with the bouquet, it all made sense. Shielding the two of you from the audience, you felt the pleasing satisfaction of his bare lips to yours, the sensation enough to send an electric shock through every cell in your body as he pulled your waist closer to his hips. Your whole body blushed at the thrill of kissing your husband without his mask in front of a hundred or so people.

Pulling away breathlessly, he looked down at you, relishing the look of awestruck satisfaction on your face as he pulled his mask back over his nose. Setting the bouquet back at your waist, you gave a dazed smile to the cheering attendees.

As you turned back to the ever louder cheering guests, you felt his lips touch the shell of your ear while you walked back down the aisle.

"Was that good enough for you?" He quipped, smiling behind his mask. You giggled at his remark, waving to your guests.

As you reached a private place behind the crowd, you let out a long sigh, waving your hand to fan yourself. You smiled, joy filling every nerve ending in your body.

Looking out at the crowd that dispersed to a cocktail hour, you felt the warm embrace of the Hokage's arms around your waist. You sighed again, inhaling his scent as he buried his lips in your neck. You felt his grip tighten on your hips.

"I love you," you murmured to him, caressing the hand on your hips. Quickly, he turned you around to face him, searching your face as if to emanate with his eyes how he was feeling.

"I don't think you understand," he whispered to you, his hand on your jaw. You reached up, your fingers brushing over his knuckles and the warm wedding band on his fingers.

"Understand what?" You giggled.

His face remained serious, his gaze overwhelming.

"Understand what?" You repeated quietly.

"You're the best thing that has ever happened to me."