#we want to try and engage with some of our wayyyy older interests to see if maybe our 'imaginary friends' of them | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

nexus-nebulae · 25 days ago

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now that we're looking into our body past and finding way more signs that we've been plural for god knows how long, we've been leaning into more of the things we used to do very naturally to express our plurality and it's been kinda fun

#like how we used to have so many imaginary friends that lasted for far far longer than a kid should have imaginary friends #like. at least up to middle school #so when we were 12 or 13 #and even when the imaginary friend aspect faded (and became a paracosm) we'd still stick to the same habits #of talking to them and not feeling like *i* was controlling what they were saying #and having them run around near us and interact with the environment like running alongside a car #we still do that a lot with imagining dragons flying alongside the car #and we've started to apply that to our sys now and it feels really natural and fun #we want to try and engage with some of our wayyyy older interests to see if maybe our 'imaginary friends' of them #could possibly be headmates we didn't register as headmates back then #the big evidence for those not being imaginary friends that we have is like. we didn't always Choose who we included in our cast #it was multiple different fictional characters from shows we liked and we didn't. pick which characters we got #bc the two main things we remember from back then #is 1: Matt got his arm broken at one point and it DIDN'T HEAL for 3 months and none of us knew why #like i was genuinely upset over the fact that i couldn't imagine it away i was so convinced i should be able to do that but i couldn't #and also 2: Matt missed his source friends but i couldn't ever get them to show up as imaginary friends #OH also 3: multiple times i tried to go 'i don't need imaginary friends anymore. goodbye' and they wouldn't fucking leave #and all this just. feels like how our sys works now #down to the 'i don't want you to be here. goodbye' (she's still there 4 years later) (very sorry hope we were just scared)#(we were like NOT AN INTROJECT OF *HER* and attempted to will her to become someone else but instead we just got one of each)#(we've learned to stop doing that now)

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