#we promise we're at least a little bit okay sanity wise

[camelotsheart]

1) Hephaestion played a full part in Alexander's regular consultations with senior officers, but he was the one to whom Alexander would also talk in private, sharing his thoughts, hopes, and plans. Curtius states that Hephaestion was the sharer of all his secrets 2) describes an occasion when Hephaestion's conversation one morning implied that he had been in Alexander's tent all night,[68] and Plutarch describes the intimacy between them when he tells how Hephaestion was in the habit of reading Alexander's letters with him, 3) "it is surely incredible that Alexander's reaction to Hephaestion's death could indicate anything other than the closest relationship imaginable".[71] The many and varied ways, both spontaneous and planned, by which Alexander poured out his grief are detailed below. In the context of the nature of their relationship however, one stands out as remarkable. Arrian says that Alexander "flung himself on the body of his friend and lay there nearly all day long in tears, and refused to be parted from him until he was dragged away by force by his Companions".

4) Their tutor Aristotle described generally friendship as "one soul abiding in two bodies".[36] That they themselves considered their friendship to be of such a kind is shown by the stories of the morning after the Battle of Issus. Diodorus,[37]Arrian[38] and Curtius[39]  all describe the scene when Alexander and Hephaestion went together to  visit the captured Persian royal family. Its senior member, the queen Sisygambis,  knelt to Hephaestion to plead for their lives, having mistaken him for  Alexander because he was taller, and both young men were wearing similar  clothes. When she realized her mistake she was acutely embarrassed, but  Alexander pardoned her, saying "You were not mistaken, Mother; this man  too is Alexander."[39]  Their affection for each other was no secret, as is borne out by their  own words. Hephaestion, when replying to a letter to Alexander's mother,  Olympias, said "you know that Alexander means more to us than anything".[40] Arrian says that Alexander, after Hephaestion's death, described him as "the friend I valued as my own life".[41]Paul Cartledge describes their closeness when he says: "Alexander seems actually to have referred to Hephaestion as his alter ego."

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According to the painting done by Aetion of Alexander's first wedding, Hephaestion was his torch-bearer (best man), showing by this not only his friendship, but also his support for Alexander's policies as Alexander's choice of an Asian bride had not been a popular one among the Macedonians.

It has been suggested by some modern scholars that as well as being close friends Alexander and Hephaestion were also lovers, though hardly any of Alexander's extant ancient Greek or Roman biographers ever refers to Hephaestion as anything but Alexander's friend,[51][52] consistent with Hephaestion's epithet "Philalexandros" which was given to him by Alexander himself.[53] It has been observed, however, that the ancient Greek word for friend "φίλος" (Philos) was also applied to lovers in the homo-erotic or sexual sense. [54]

Arrian and Plutarch describe the occasion when Alexander and Hephaestion publicly identified themselves with the Homeric figures of Achilles and Patroclus. At the onset of the campaign in Asia, Alexander led a contingent of the army to visit Troy, scene of the events in his beloved Iliad. He encircled the tomb of Achilles with a garland and Hephaestion did the same with the tomb of Patroclus.

After Hephaestion's death in Oct 324 BC, Alexander mourned him greatly and did not eat for days.[12] Alexander held an elaborate funeral for Hephaestion at Babylon, and sent a note to the shrine of Ammon, which had previously acknowledged Alexander as a god, asking them to grant Hephaestion divine honours. The priests declined, but did offer him the status of divine hero. Alexander died soon after receiving this letter; Mary Renault suggests that his grief over Hephaestion's death had led him to be careless with his health.