#we have never had a hitter (that wasn't actually moreau's) au

[onyxbird]

Hello! I saw a post of yours saying you have a Leverage Hell AU series on Ao3. Any chance I can get the link to that? Thanks!

☠️ Warning ☠️: Consumption of Hell AU may result in Leverage brainrot and compulsions to write angsty fic. Experts* recommend against consumption of large doses of this AU in a short period of time, particularly for new users who do not know how they will be affected. Certain lines in this AU have been identified by the state of the comments section to be hazardous to human health. Writing while under the influence of Hell AU may pose a risk of spreading this contagion to others.

Please consume responsibly.

We Have Never Had a Hitter (That Wasn't Actually Moreau's)

*@darkfinch

[onyxbird]

Me, reaching this post after having read today's AO3 emails and Tumblr notes: 😬 "Yep, they sure did binge that AU."

Glad that you... uh......... whatever people do with this AU instead of enjoying it. 😉

Hello I have binged the entire Undercover Eliot AU tag in a little over 6 hrs and I’m now working my way through the attached fics and I am NOT OKAY PLEASE SEND HELP

It was fantastic and my brain chemistry is permanently altered so thank you for that

🩵💜🩵💜

!!! i'm SO GLAD that you enjoyed it but also i really do feel like i made a PSA like "hey guys don't eat 9 bars of chocolate in a row it's bad for you to eat 9 bars of chocolate in a row actually" and now people are lining up outside my door to tell me v earnestly how much they loved eating the 9 bars of chocolate in a row, but did i know it gives you tummy aches? did i know it irreversibly changes your gut microbiome? send help? thank you for the chocolate bars i ate 9 of them in a row?

lkjghlffhjgdh i'm very glad you're having fun though the fics are SO GOOD, enjoy <3

[onyxbird]

Today I have picked back up on working on my "Worse-than-Worst AU" WIP, i.e., the one where both Eliot and Parker are working for Moreau and still working for him when they join Leverage. (And I think I figured out some things about how I'm going to bring the situation to a head, so fingers crossed that that works out.)

However, as I read through and expand on what I already had written, I am discovering that certain things about The Nigerian Job work unsettlingly well for this AU without any tweaks other than the thought process behind them in the Parker internal monologue. 😬

[onyxbird]

hihi you and finch got me into quinn a Lot and you mentionned a hell au. is it on ao3 ? :eyes:

Ah, yes, a very simple yes/no question that does not have a simple yes/no answer. 😉

First off, Quinn is not a central character of Hell AU in general, so if you're looking for Quinn content, this probably isn't the AU to find it in. (The so-called "QWAT AU"/"Quinn Was Always There AU" is a much more lighthearted and Quinn-centric AU you might want to check out. Tagged "qwat au" by Finch and "we have always had two hitters au" by me.)

"Hell AU"/"Worst AU"/etc. is sort of a loose collection of concepts/ficlets/etc. about the scenario of Eliot having never left Damien Moreau's employ, but still joining the team in "The Nigerian Job" while secretly working for Moreau. It started on @darkfinch's blog (I think with this post). Both Finch and I use the tag "undercover eliot au" here on Tumblr.

Some fic for this AU is on AO3, e.g., anything I've published on AO3 for that AU is collected in this series*, but there's certainly a lot more that has circulated in Tumblr posts by various people and possibly elsewhere on AO3.

If you decide to dive in, please be aware that this AU is frequently dark, painful, and focused on Eliot being in a really fucked-up place mentally due to prolonged working with Moreau and on the team getting blindsided by the fact that someone they trusted completely has been lying to them the whole time.

*The title of my Hell AU series is my original (long-winded) tag for it, and it parallels my QWAT AU tag because they're kind of opposite sides of a similar what-if: What if Eliot's past with Moreau had ended differently? QWAT is the happier-than-canon AU where Eliot gets a ride-or-die hitter friend when he could most use one right after getting away from Moreau (and then escalating into lighthearted comedy of Quinn being integrated into the team from the beginning). Hell AU is the much-worse-than-canon AU where Eliot is grappling with conflicting loyalties with no one to turn to.

[darkfinch]

wait okay I saw an ask about binge-reading undercover Eliot AU and is there a written version of worst AU??? bc I want to read it!!! (but also I don't bc it will hurt me, but I will anyway) it's such a fun but awful concept and I love it so much!!!

!!! there is a SERIES on ao3 by the one and only onyxbird [link]

generally though when i talk about binge-reading worst au i mean watching people via the notifications feverishly & with great hunger consume onyx's #we have never had a hitter (that wasn't actually moreau's) au tag or my #undercover eliot au tag at ALARMING speed fkjhglkjfhg

[onyxbird]

...The Worse Than Worst AU, where Eliot and Parker are working for Moreau.

My initial gut reaction is that while they're still working for Moreau, Eliot would be the one trying to steer Parker away from the darker stuff and trying to take on the dirtier jobs to keep her from going deeper down that path (despite not even being sure why he's trying to protect this "crazy" thief), while once they meet up with the team, Parker would be the one to go "Hey, this team is way better. Let's keep them" without all the thorny misplaced loyalty to Moreau that Eliot has going on (and continuing to wear down all his arguments by bluntly pointing out the ways Moreau is shitty).

You know, the Leverage world is very lucky that Parker is a thief and that Archie is the one who found her, and not someone like Damien Moreau.

Because she would be terrifying as an assassin or something any way more lethal than a thief.

[onyxbird]

Hell AU thoughts after re-reading the bit about the Nigerian Job and other team payouts in @darkfinch's early posts on the idea, and what happens to Eliot's share of the money.

The Nigerian Job payout is probably a loss.

Moreau would have known about the initial promised paycheck from Dubenich, and Eliot would have to explain what happened when everything went pear-shaped, with the fact that they punished Dubenich and made a fortune off his demise being one of the strongest arguments that Eliot made the right call in sticking it out rather than abandoning the others and going back to Moreau to plan to bury Dubenich in their own way.

Plus, even if Moreau didn't know about the final payout, Eliot still considered himself to be solidly Moreau's at that point, and he'd be playing with fire if he tried to deliberately hide the funds, even if he were tempted.

Money from later in Leverage's operations is a different story.

They don't charge a standard fee that would come in at predictable intervals that Moreau would miss. Often most or all of what they steal goes directly to their clients or other victims. But, Eliot would still have the problem of being able to hide any money he received well enough to ensure Moreau would never find out.

What if he never got the money, though? What if, after a few times of the team getting a payout (with Eliot's portion dutifully handed over to Moreau), he "casually" tells Hardison to put his portion towards something else? Maybe something for their offices. Or something extra to help some of the victims. Or just to donate to some charity ("No, I don't want any receipts! Do it anonymously! I don't want that linked back to me!"). Anything to redirect it to somewhere it'll do some good rather than fund Moreau, without it ever touching Eliot's accounts.

Hardison knows something is up. Eliot's being awfully weird about it, and seems really unhappy for someone taking the opportunity to donate a whole heap of money to worthy causes because he thinks it'll do more good there. But Eliot's snappish when he tries to ask anything, so Hardison obligingly distributes Eliot's share as instructed and just starts paying a little more attention to what he can see of Eliot's finances.

And it's weird. Eliot's doesn't spend much; he doesn't have a ton of apparently expensive stuff, but the only accounts he ever seems to touch don't have a ton in them either. (Relatively speaking--he's always got ample funds, but not "this guy is worth 10s of millions of dollars" ample.) As far as a virtual footprint goes, it's like Eliot's first payout and any other significant savings just don't exist, unless he cashed it out and stored it in gold bullion or something.

So after a couple instances of Eliot not accepting his share, Hardison very casually floats a "Sure, man. But you haven't taken anything from the last 3 payouts--you sure you don't need to top up any of your emergency funds or anything? I can split it up any way you want."

Eliot's face does something really weird in response to that, and Hardison knows he's on to something. He doesn't know what is going on, but whatever it is, Eliot's not giving the money away just because he's feeling flush and charitable. So Hardison pushes a little. "Look, I can drop it into a brand-new account if you still don't trust me with your emergency accounts. You can move it wherever you like from there."

Eliot never touches the money in the new account.

He can't, since he says he'll get the account info from Hardison "later" and then never does. Hardison doesn't bring it up--he knows Eliot hasn't forgotten about the account, because every time there's a team payout, he tells Hardison how much to put in the "emergency account" versus something else. If he hasn't asked the account info, it's because he doesn't want to be able to access it.

Eliot asked for the balance once, as they gathered for the first new job after a break, seeming kind of stressed. Hardison told him and asked if he needed the account info. "Oh, not now. I'll get it from you later."

So Hardison just keeps maintaining the account. He makes sure the identity linked to it is squeaky clean and the taxes are paid. He spins off a couple of other accounts as it grows so the money isn't all in one place where it could all be drained by a single attack.

At some point after the truth comes out, he asks if Eliot wants the account details now. Eliot's a little shocked that Hardison is still willing to hand it over after his betrayal. He's even more surprised by how much money there is after all this time. (Eliot's pretty sure that there is more money than there should be. Hardison refuses to comment.)

[onyxbird]

Unspeakable

Ficlet from @darkfinch's Hell AU, wherein Eliot never left Moreau's employ and has been Moreau's mole within the Leverage crew for three years. Jumping off from the ideas that Moreau would want to meet/recruit Hardison and this results in Eliot panicking and coming clean to Nate, only for Nate to suggest actually going through with taking Hardison to the meet-up.

☠️☠️☠️ Look, this is not a happy AU. Proceed accordingly. ☠️☠️☠️

“Do it,” said Nate, crisply. He took a sip of his whiskey, frowning out the front window, without really seeing the stripes of rainy streetscape between the blinds.

“What?” said Eliot. Confusion bled into the dull, almost-robotic blankness that had laced his voice since he arrived, as if everything about Eliot since he joined the team had been a grift, a personality programmed in by his employer to appeal to the crew.

“Do it. If Moreau wants to meet Hardison, then bring him.”

The pieces of the plan slowly slotted into place in Nate's mind. There would be risk, of course, but Moreau still thought he had the upper hand, that Eliot was loyal to him.

Nate never heard him move.

The glass flew from Nate's fingers as a muscular hand wrenched him around, just a heartbeat before his back slammed forcefully into the wall.

Nate's head bounced off the drywall, pain exploding from the point of impact. The glass shattered on the floor. There was a knife at his throat and murder in Eliot's eyes, and Nate suddenly, belatedly, remembered why Eliot Spencer had been the bogeyman of the criminal world even without the known link to Damien Moreau.

…

Nate was supposed to help. Shit, shit, shit. He'd fucked up. Doubled the number of Masterminds out to hurt Hardison. They were different, though. Moreau was out of reach, but Nate had been foolish. There was only one way to deal with someone who could be the next Moreau. He had to die before he could build his empire. Before he could become untouchable.

This would blow the whole con. He had to get them out. Grab Hardison and Parker and stash them somewhere until he could find a way to keep them away from Moreau permanently…somehow.

He couldn't kill Nate. If Hardison and Parker found out, they'd be terrified. They wouldn't understand. Lock Nate up; tip Sophie off after they were well gone. Even Nate couldn't build a criminal stronghold overnight. There would be time to come back. Time to mop up if he continued to be a threat.

Then it's just an extraction job. They trusted him. He could lead them on for a while, feed them some story about why Nate and Sophie were staying behind, get them to come willingly, not realize he wasn't letting them leave. They'd be upset when they caught on, but that was OK. They could hate him, as long as they were safe until Moreau was off the playing field.

Maybe he could stash Nate and use him to bait his way into Moreau's presence. Eliot didn't need to make it back out as long as he made sure Moreau would never touch them again.

Nate was talking. Begging? Bargaining? Nate wasn't the type to beg, but what else could he have to say at this point? It was just disjointed words through the haze of panic. "Don't understand...Plan...Not giving him..."

"Eliot, listen to me. Kill me if you have to—not like I could stop you—but hear me out first."

Eliot blinked, eyes finally focusing on Nate's face.

"Well. Guess I know where your loyalties are." Nate gasped, voice shaking. His head was tilted back against the wall, chin stretched upward, toes digging into the floor. It took Eliot a minute to register the slow trickle of blood oozing down his neck from where Eliot's blade pressed into the skin, and another to make the connection and ease the pressure on the knife.

For a moment, there was no sound except Nate's ragged breathing. He was trembling. Eliot could feel it in the forearm ruthlessly pinning Nate to the wall.

Nate took a deep, shaky breath and met Eliot's eyes, over the knife still poised to open his jugular. “I wasn't suggesting we should give Hardison up,” he said, slowly and deliberately. “I meant this gives us an opening. Moreau expects Hardison to walk in unprepared and alone, except for you, and Moreau thinks you're still loyal to him. You said not bringing Hardison would blow this job before we're ready. I'm saying we can have Hardison go in prepared and with an entire team making sure he—.”

Nate inhaled sharply. Eliot's fingers had flexed without conscious thought, pressing the knife back against tender flesh. He forced them to relax, giving Nate room to breathe.

“No.”

“Yeah,” Nate rasped. “Got the message.”

---

Also on AO3.

[onyxbird]

Chapters: 2/2 Fandom: Leverage Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Nathan Ford & Eliot Spencer Characters: Nathan Ford, Eliot Spencer (Leverage), Alec Hardison Additional Tags: dark au, Past Abuse, Trauma, Distrust, Nate doesn't know how to deal with this., Damien Moreau's influence Series: Part 3 of We Have Never Had a Hitter (That Wasn't Actually Moreau's) Summary:

Eliot never got away from Moreau and has been his mole within the team for three years. Nate figured out his secret, but hasn't told the rest of the team…yet. He intends to use Eliot to take down Moreau first.

Nate expects a fight, or a betrayal, or a threat. He doesn't expect total compliance.

[onyxbird]

#oh man Parker finding out Eliot still works for moreau#like Eliot recognizes that she Knows something because sometimes she’ll give him a Look#but he doesn’t think she could possibly know /that/

#until one time after a job where they really helped a lot of people and did a lot of good. Parker follows him home#to his apartment#she knows it already. has cased it before but hadn’t been inside#and it’s Empty. like completely barren of any personal items

#anyway she follows him back and into his place and he keeps trying to get rid of her so he can report back to moreau#and she asks like ‘do you report in after every job? or every five jobs? or once a week?’#trying to figure out how the system works bc if she knows the system she can break into it#the system being Eliot’s loyalty to moreau#but surprise she’s already stolen that a long time ago

#Eliot panics bc /she knows/ but she isn’t doing anything about it#she’s just watching and waiting#and if he refuses to answer she won’t ask again. but she had to ask at least once [via @thieves-never-say-die]

I see this and raise you:

They finish a job, probably one that went off the rails and took much longer than anticipated. Eliot's missed at least one of his normal call-ins and knows he absolutely has to report in ASAP or someone's going to come looking for him and it's going to be bad, but the rest of the team is celebrating the win and there's no way to extract himself without raising suspicions. (Not suspicions that working for Moreau--they'd never imagine--but if they think he's hiding an injury or something, it'll be even harder to get away.)

So Parker makes him an excuse. She demands a specific food that requires a trip to the grocery store for ingredients only Eliot knows how to pick out. Or volunteers them both to pick up take-out food from a specific hole-in-the-wall near his apartment that none of the rest of the team knows. Or acts really hyped up on adrenaline and disappears with some cryptic statement implies she's going to hotwire his car for a joyride so that he can chase after her.

And Eliot's out of his mind with frustration thinking this is how Parker finally intends to blow his cover, by deliberately making it even harder to slip away until the whole house of cards comes tumbling down... But the moment they're alone, Parker cheerfully tells him to go ahead and make his call in--she'll [drive on the way to the grocery store/pick up the food/whatever] and won't make a sound while he's on the phone--but he has to come back to join them afterwards.

it’s been a long time but……hell au thought that’s been bonking around in my empty brain, re: if the team figures it out pre-big bang job,

nate is smart but he’s playing an honest man, which would either make him blind to eliot’s con or make it easier for him to figure out. tbd. [if he does it’s hell au 2.0]

hardison is smart but he’s too good, too kind to expect one of his best friends is not entirely who he says he is 

sophie’s smart and can spot a grift a mile away but she can’t imagine actually hurting anyone (re: the homecoming job) 

parker though, parker could be the one to figure out it’s a con

and if parker is the one to figure it out, she might actually keep the secret 

vs. sophie or hardison wouldn’t be able to keep it a secret/look at eliot like he wasn’t a Monster/etc etc. but nate and parker would compartmentalize and use what they know. in different ways, but, still, two sides to the same coin

[onyxbird]

Chapters: 3/3 Fandom: Leverage Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Parker & Eliot Spencer (Leverage), Alec Hardison & Eliot Spencer, Alec Hardison & Parker & Eliot Spencer Characters: Eliot Spencer, Parker (Leverage), Alec Hardison Additional Tags: dark au, Hurt/Comfort, Implied Past Abuse, Self-Harm, (sort of), Damien Moreau's influence Summary:

Eliot never left Damien Moreau's employ, and he spent three long years as his agent within the Leverage crew, feeding information back with greater and greater reluctance as the team wormed their way into his heart. When they started hunting Moreau, there was no way they wouldn't find out. No way they wouldn't hate him. Of course Eliot had known Nate's plan would get him hurt, but it only made sense. Mastermind efficiency—accomplish a job and punish the traitor at the same time, right?

Weirdly, the team seemed to disagree. Why were they still trying to take care of him?

The aftermath of a job after Eliot's secret was revealed to the team.

[onyxbird]

In Hell AU after this fic...

Nate: "Is there a reason you and Hardison seem to be trying to squeeze Eliot to death?"

Parker: "We're squishing his soul back into his body so he'll be Eliot again."

Nate, who almost completed Catholic seminary: "Uh..."

[onyxbird]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Leverage Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Eliot Spencer & Team Leverage, Parker & Eliot Spencer (Leverage), Alec Hardison & Eliot Spencer Characters: Eliot Spencer (Leverage), Parker (Leverage), Alec Hardison Additional Tags: dark au, Past Abuse, Trauma, Damien Moreau's influence, Hugs, Not as dark as other parts of this series/AU, Eliot's perceptions and coping mechanisms are still severely screwed up, but the team is trying to help Series: Part 4 of We Have Never Had a Hitter (That Wasn't Actually Moreau's) Summary:

Eliot never got away from Moreau and has been his mole within the team for three years, slowly growing genuinely attached to the crew. Once they start targeting Moreau, the secret has to come out. After the team finds out, Eliot grapples with trying to fit into the team under these circumstances, and Parker comes up with an unusual strategy to cure what ails Eliot.

For all of you who keep yelling at me about hurting you with this AU and saying Eliot needs a hug, behold! A wholesome(ish?) Hell AU fic! (How’s that for an oxymoron?)

[onyxbird]

I sometimes get AO3 emails where every fic in my Hell AU series has been kudoed, and it's like "Glad you liked it, but I'm not sure this is a good AU for bingereading. Please get yourself some fluff as a palate cleanser."

i can't believe i say "don't binge-read worst au it's corrosive to the mind and spirit" and immediately i see another person in my notifs binge-reading worst au. whacking you all with rolled up newspapers (affectionate)

[onyxbird]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Leverage Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Alec Hardison & Eliot Spencer Characters: Alec Hardison, Eliot Spencer (Leverage), Damien Moreau Additional Tags: dark au, Episode: s03e15 The Big Bang Job, Alternate Pool Scene, (no one goes in the water), Crack Treated Seriously, POV Alec Hardison, AU aesthetics Series: Part 5 of We Have Never Had a Hitter (That Wasn't Actually Moreau's) Summary:

Eliot never got away from Moreau and worked as his mole within the team for three years, slowly growing attached to the crew. When they set their sights on Moreau, Eliot has to choose sides.

Hardison already regretted volunteering to accompany Eliot on this errand, but he kept his mouth shut since Eliot was on tenterhooks already preparing to con Moreau for Leverage. Now if he can just figure out why everyone is looking at Eliot so strangely…

Note: This started with a joke concept, and it's a considerably lighter take on this AU than other installments in the series, but it's still set in a dark AU and not exactly a humor fic.

[darkfinch]

Okay but that worst au sounds fucking amazing please say more

it is what i have been mentally referring to as goodterrible in that it is so deeply fucking compelling but it also does feel like my brain is being made into swiss cheese every time i consider it,

it started over here [x] [x] with the idea of "what if Eliot never stopped working for Moreau and was undercover during seasons 1-3" and we collectively lost our collective minds. just a group of people waking up and endlessly choosing violence. absolute madness you can find all of my posts about it under the #undercover eliot au tag, but it is also referred to lovingly as "hell au", "worst au", "the bad au", "moreau's fiddle game", and "we have never had a hitter (that wasn't actually moreau's) au" etc if you're searching for it :^)

there are variants [x]! there are a couple of fics [1] [2] [3]! all of them are challenging! there is only suffering 2 b found here hope u enjoy <3