#we finally got to try an all inclusive resort

[mechadress]

Costa Rica, Liberia

[la-appel-du-vide]

PUNTA CANA - Birthday Trip

Packing was a bit of a rushed mess, but it turned out fine. Beach and B came with me, so Jason came to give us a ride to the airport. Beach let me open my presents at my house before we left since she didn’t want to pack them around. She got me a pink Lulu sports bra, a Starbucks cup, and a game based on your zodiac sign. B also had me open one gift before we left, and it was a Moji home scent system. We have been loving how good they make all the Parade of Homes houses smell every time we go through one, and so he knew I wanted to try it! Can’t wait.

Our flight ended up pretty delayed (we flew JetBlue since they had a good deal for Punta Cana, but it ended up being kind of a regret) but they kept telling us to get to the airport on-time anyway since they would try to get things back on track. So we went a bit later than we would have otherwise, but with some time to still spare. The delay was frustrating, especially because it ended up pushing on our connecting flight in Fort Lauderdale, but once we finally got on, I slept like the dead the entire time. I love those kinds of flights. We were cutting our connection a little bit close, but we made it, and had another quick flight down to the DR. I slept through that one again, so love that for me.

The second we got off the plane we were smacked by the humidity - it was intense. That’s my only problem with these beautiful, tropical locations hahah. I hate humidity. We got through customs, got our bags, and made it pretty quickly over to the resort. We could tell it was going to be really nice pretty immediately. They sat us down, brought us welcome drinks, and went to get us checked in, and then we were good to go. We dropped our stuff off in the room - which was lovely, with a cool white reef chandelier - and headed straight down to the pool. We were all ready to be refreshed. The resort has six or seven pools, and we went down to the one that seemed most popular (likely because it has the bar in it). We took a dip, and then laid on some beach chairs to relax. I ended up taking a pretty good nap, just enjoying the breeze blowing nicely over me. When I woke up, we were ready for a lunch-dish snack. Being an all-inclusive resort, we could order whatever we wanted, whenever we wanted. This was my first all-inclusive, and it was pretty great. We went to the beach grill and got some nachos and tostadas, and they were bomb. The nachos ended up being a personal favorite, that I would get many more times. The water here was somewhat refreshing, but not cold enough to make up for the insane heat. Luckily, it was late-afternoon and the heat started to die down. Everyone was pretty well cleared out of the pool by 5 or so, so we got to have a swim to ourselves. When we got out to go explore the resort a bit, we found a sand volleyball court, and we greatly enjoyed playing a few games (Beach and I against B, and it was still a hard battle haha). It’s been forever since I last played volleyball. That was a VERY hot and sweaty activity, so it was immediately back to the pool for us, for one final evening swim before dinner. After we got showered and cleaned up, we picked the Teppanyaki-style dinner for night #1. There were only two other people at our table, and it was pretty late by the time we ate (after 9), so we were all pretty low energy. The chef was NOT, and wanted a lot of audience participation, and we tried, but it was a bit much for us haha. The food wasn’t bad, though I thought the meat could have been better. We each got a skewer of chicken, steak, and salmon, and then some friend rice, and miso soup - plus a roll of sushi. It was a set menu, so not a lot of choice in it, but it was good. The meat was just a bit over done, maybe? Kind of rubbery. They also really wanted us to drink their special rum after, to the point where they poured us a cup - kind of annoying, after we declined so many times haha. We were so tired by this point, and were so ready to get to BED.

Then, it was my BIRTHDAY! B got up and decorated white I was still sleeping, so I got to wake up to a decorated hotel room too. He did purple and blue balloons to match my cake, and then signs that said “Older, Wiser, Hotter” hahaha, it was cute. We all felt SO much better after a good night of sleep, and we went down to start our day with the beautiful breakfast buffet. They had a custom egg/omelette station, pastries, fruit, Dominican specialties, hash browns, smoothies, juice, pancakes, crepes… you name it. It was perfect. My favorite was to get an omelette and then smother it in the Dominican pico de Gallo - SO good. After breakfast, we went out to the pool. This time, we opted for one of the higher, deeper pools. It was fairly empty, and so much cooler because it was so much deeper. That was the temperature we really needed to feel better in that heat! We swam, napped, read, and lounged in the sun all day- which is pretty much my birthday dream. I worship the sun, and love nothing more than being in the water (clearly a water sign) so I was absolutely content. We got more nachos, ordered poolside Pina coladas, and were just living our best lives. We got ready for dinner, which was a special Dominican food themed night in the main restaurant, and this was the only time I made any real effort to look nice for dinner - because duh, birthday. They had a whole market set up outside, and it was fun to look, but man those people are pushy. I wanted to buy an anklet, but the guy literally wanted over $300 for it. Insane. I ended up buying a Larimar ring for Kena and a little beaded necklace for me for a total of $20. B bought a little wooden monkey statue and a magnet for his parents for $53 - not a very good deal, but these people reallllly suck. Dinner wasn’t bad, but wasn’t my favorite meal of the trip, that’s for sure. I mostly ate some pasta and bread, B tried Dominican stew, rice and chicken, “mafongo….” But Beach went the hardest- she tried tripe and hoof stew, and the hoof was mostly just fat hahah. I love getting her food vlogs trying weird stuff everywhere we go. We went to get ice cream for dessert while B waited at the table, and I texted him the options: “Vanilla, chocolate, pistachio, biscuit” and he said, “wtf is biscuit” and that killed me, because I also had no idea haha. I had chocolate and it wasn’t bad, and Beach got biscuit which she ended up really liking. We also tried vanilla and pistachio, and pistachio might have been my favorite. After dinner, we stopped by the Sweet Shoppe for a birthday treat. I picked out an Oreo cheesecake with sprinkles, and it probably would have been better, but we waited to long to eat it, and then it wasn’t cold anymore haha. We went back to the room to play the new zodiac game I got from Beach. It really just consists of reading qualities you should have based on your zodiac sign and having others vote on if they think they’re true or not. A lot of them ended up being super emotional and personal, and Beach couldn’t get over how deep things were getting hahah. After a while, we decided to move on to play cards instead. We’d been playing on one of the beds, and Beach decided she’d rather be playing on the table, so she went to clear it off. The table was a two level table with glass tops on each level. The bottom tier was on a swivel, and Beach thought the top one would be too, but when she tried to move it the glass top tipped and slide off. She caught it, but the decorative bowl on top slide to the ground and shattered. That put a bit of a damper on the night, and ended up costing $78, but it was a total accident, and it is annoying that the table top wasn’t secure at all. We ended the night by watching Hannah Montana, which is the perfect end to a lovely birthday. I got kind texts and messages all day, which I always just love, and I get so sad to see the day come to an end every year. B made me feel better by reminding me that we got to celebrate through the whole birthday trip haha.

[writer-updates]

Sebastian Knight

Chapter 7 - Sebastian

While Liliana left to help Deigo, I was being interviewed Emily for an article when something unusual caught my eye. She was wearing a wire and trying to hide it from me, but I could tell she was nervous. I had to be careful of what I said around her, as I didn't want to give away any information.

Her flashy hazel eyes did nothing to throw me off my guard. I could tell she was disappointed, but there was nothing more I could do.

Just as I was about to speak again, I heard someone tapping a microphone and interrupted my train of thought. I turned to see a man at the front of the room, dressed in a crisp suit, addressing the crowd.

"Good evening ladies and gentlemen, before we start this auction off, I want to thank everyone for coming."

I glanced over at Emily who nodded in agreement with him before turning back toward me in time to hear him continue. "As some of you may already know, tonight's auction is being held by Mr. Blaine Worthington himself."

The crowd around me grew cheerer as they knew we worked together on previous auctions, he was a great auctioneer and had an eye for the most valuable. He knew I gave the best parties, he would bring in famous celebrities or even just wealthy people and have them show off their wealth by donating items like expensive cars and houses for charity auctions.

My eyes darted to the left as I saw Liliana escorting Mr Blaine to the stage as he was of course an old man. Mr Blaine has worked with my family for years and was a dear friend.

"Ladies and gentlemen, would anybody here tonight like to take a holiday? By show of hands, how many of you are planning to take a vacation this year?" Mr Blaine asked not wasting another second.

Mostly everyone in the ballroom raised their hands in to air to the question. Liliana headed back over towards me, reaching out for her. I gently grabbed her hand once again. Leaning into her ear, I whispered.

"Emily has a wire attached, keep normal. Let the others know later."

Liliana nodded, scanning the room once more. Trying to see if someone was nearby she could speak too.

"Well, have I got good news for you lucky folks! For tonight's live auction, the Lakewood Rotary Club has acquired two amazing vacation packages from Winspire, the nation's leading provider of unique travel experiences," Mr Blaine spoke again.

"The first is a 'dream-come-true' for the lady in your life: a weekend shopping spree at Bloomingdale's in Santa Monica, Los Angeles, plus a $1000 gift card and the services of a personal shopper. These assistants are at-the-ready to offer fashion advice and attend to your every shopping need."

The crowd of guests grew more excited at the description of the holiday. Liliana leaned against my arm.

Mr Blaine continued, "And, if that wasn't enough, our second package is an all-inclusive, two-week-long tropical adventure! Pack your bags and imagine exploring two exotic destinations; first, to a secret beach in Costa Rica, with days spent in pure tranquility and romance, and then a stay in a top-of-the-line Caribbean resort!"

Liliana squeezed my hand in anticipation as Mr. Blaine went on to describe all of the amenities included in the package. The auction began, and before long the bids for each of the packages rose steadily. Finally, when the bids had reached an unprecedented level, the crowd erupted with excitement and she looked up at me with a glimmer in her eye. I could see that she had already chosen which package she wanted. We bid aggressively and ultimately secured the Caribbean resort vacation.

As the night contuined each item that was given had be brought and only one was left. It seemed to be a cheap item but the more money for the childrens hospital, the better.

"And our last bid of the night is this is this luxury spa gift pack with a gift voucher, do I hear 100?" Mr Blaine asked.

The room was quiet for a few moments until a voice rang through, "150."

Mr Blaine nodded and contuined until he got up higher, at this point. The bidding continues, with the auctioneer calling out higher and higher bids. The room is filled with the sound of voices, all competing for the item.

Finally, Mr Blaine calls out the winning bid. "Sold to the gentleman in the back for $500!"

Vendors began passing out food once the auction was finished, meanwhile I looked at Emily taking a drink from a glass of champagne I had in my hand.

"Ready for our interview?" I asked, a slight smirk on my face.

Emily smiled warmly, "Yes." She fiddled in her bag getting a pen and paper out, huffing as she finally looked back up at me. "Thank you for allowing me to interview you, on such short notice."

"That's fine, as you can see from over there a lot of reporters are here," I replied.

"So Mr Knight, what made you want to do a charity for children?" Emily asked.

"It's always been a dream of mine to help the less fortunate out with more research and more places for sick children to stay with their families. We have raised over half a million dollars so far to build a brand new location which will also have a hospital and the best cancer doctors and nurses out there to help these children. It will have over 500 apartments and will be free of charge for everyone battling this horrible desaise. I honestly can't wait for the day when cancer is cured," I replied, I was passionate about this project.

As children are the future, what's a future without children. No one likes cancer. Emily finished writing everything down before looking at me.

"Who is/was your role model?"

Looking at Emily, I took a second to think before answering this question, "My mum. Unfortunately my mum had passed away a few years ago but honestly she had such a kind soul. She was always there to help people and those who are struggling a lot. She opened our home to many strangers over Christmas, thanksgiving and Easter. It hurt her to see so many people without families over the holidays. She even had a regular night once a week where she would invite anyone off the street to our house and we would hold a massive feast."

"Wouldn't there be risk of theft?" Emily asked.

"Actually most of those we brought to our house for meals and warmth and just family are actually working for us as well and we've never had an issue. Even Liliana is starting to do the same, helping those who can't help themselves. She's managed to get 35 percent of those on the streets a job at one of her father's pubs as either hosts and packers."

"What projects are you presently working on?" Emily queried while tucking her hand behind her right ear.

I couldn't help but chuckle to myself, I knew what she was trying to get out of me, "Well, I am actually really proud of Liliana, she has a open show coming up soon which I'm very proud to be by her side for." I didn't say much more than that because I promised her I wouldn't.

Emily looked disappointed at my answer, she probably thinks she has me fooled but oh no. I can smell a rat when I see one and I'm not letting out any vital information, who knows who could be listening. "One more question Mr Knight. How do you balance your work and private lives?"

"It is the most difficult thing to balance your work life and your private one. I try to take one month out each year so that I can just run away from it all with my family. I try not to work over the weekends unless I have a commission that is not in the city where I live. Somehow, this arrangement works," I snarled, hating where this conversation or 'interview' was going.

[ficforthought]

On being SO DONE with M*sha, a rant a decade in the making!

After giving this some thought I'm going to go ahead and give my opinion on Misha and yesterday’s situation in public for the first time ever. I was going to just post on Twitter but since this has been 12 years in the making I have exceeded the number of tweets I can put in one thread! There’s A LOT in here, so my summary is also long. I'm aware that I will lose followers over this, I'm not looking to offend anyone but it will inevitably happen. I wish anyone leaving all the best as fellow human beings.

TL;DR - having kept quiet for so long I’ve finally reached my limit and it’s all come bubbling out. I’ve never been a fan of Misha, I’ve been ambivalent for the most part, but have never criticised him in any hateful way, that's not who I am, but after all these years of putting up with his bullshit, attention seeking and troublemaking I am DONE. Deleting his tweet containing the word Wincest and replacing it with an APOLOGY just to pander to his Minions and save face is the straw that broke the camel's back. He has consistently pushed his ship on not only fans but on other actors (despite Jensen's discomfort, and him having repeatedly made his feelings known on it), he has stood by while his Minions/Hellers have harassed, victimised, doxxed and sent death threats to people based on their FICTIONAL ships. He has pandered to their gatekeeping, constantly demanded attention in obvious and not so obvious ways, and to the best of my knowledge never criticised their actions even though he's aware of it in a very real way. Some of his Minions have now taken their shit into The Boys fandom and created negativity for Jensen before the guy has even got a foot through the set door, and how is that supporting one half of your ship?

Misha has claimed to be a victim of targeted harassment from Wincest/brother fans (not only shippers) yet his fans have said and done the most despicable things on his watch, all in the name of what he must think is entertainment, or even his idea of a ‘joke’.

Any respect I had for the man based on his humanitarian work has gone because I can only take so much hypocrisy. He and his pandering because of a desperate attempt to be woke and wholly inclusive (which is actually impossible, no matter how good intentions are) are beyond pathetic. Whilst I have never seen why people think he’s so great I have friends IRL and online who genuinely adore the man, yet they have been shocked and upset by his contempt for half of the fandom that made him somewhat famous. It's disgusting and I'm not scrolling by any more. Misha, I hope to never see you on anything J2 related in future because none of us need that kind of negativity, *especially* not J2. Be gone, foul fiend!

OK, so to the too long part. Please be aware that these are my opinions as a fan of the show, of Sam and Dean, and J2, not only as a shipper. I can separate canon and fanon, and can view canon from a gen or shippy PoV. Whether you agree or disagree with my opinion let me be clear that I do not condone constant bashing and hate of a person or character so this isn’t the start of a regular thing for me. It's possible to have an opinion and not show the same vitriol that has been following this man around for years, and that’s what I’m doing. I've not posted this to prompt more negativity, it's simply to get it off my chest and make it clear how I feel. I stand by my philosophy of ship who you want to ship, enjoy it, but don't force it on other people and don't be a dick about it…hmm, that kinda sounds like familiar behaviour, though, does it not?!

I have ABSOLUTELY NO ISSUE with other people liking Misha, Cas or Destiel when it’s for the love of the characters and the ship. What I *do* have an issue with is people who are the true definition of a Heller. I don’t see that as a generic term, don't be ignorant and think I do because I know the difference between actual ship fans and the crazies, both ships have ‘em and I want no part of either of their venom. If you are reading this and class yourself as a Heller then you are part of the problem so run along and as you are all so fond of saying, 'get help' and take your bestie king with you.

I’m stating my opinion in what I feel is the most mature way I can, because unlike many people on SM, I am an adult and can act accordingly, with forethought and without resorting to temper tantrums and bullying of other people to get my point across. I am able to tell the difference between reality and fiction, I don't tar everyone with the same shipper brush and I don't expect everyone to agree with my opinion, but as we know opinions are like arseholes, we all have them and sometimes they stink. Unlike some, for the most part in life (online and offline) I *do* stand by what I say and don’t backtrack or delete things to appease the masses. I have spent a lot of time writing this out to be as clear as possible without being intentionally hateful. Bear with me jumping between actor and character where relevant, at this point they're conjoined. I will say this before I go any further, it doesn’t end well for Misha, I don’t mince my words and if you don’t like seeing facts and opinions laid out, this isn't the post for you.

I’ll say right off the bat what most of you have surmised - I’ve never held Misha (or Cas) in high esteem but I have never *hated* on him. I have shared mild criticism of his actions and opinions on Cas over the years but never, I feel, in any way that has made me feel I have something to apologise for. I have said several times I've been unhappy about Misha crashing con panels, taking attention away from J2 when at those cons *most* people paid their hard earned money to see the STARS of the show they love, first and foremost, and anyone else is a very nice bonus. The odd appearance here and there crashing a panel is fine (and Misha isn’t the first or last person to do it), maybe take up a few minutes then leave, but when someone commandeers an entire panel, that's just not on. It's not only selfish, rude and attention seeking but also disrespectful to other actors, fans and to the organisers who work hard to make sure everything ties in to give us the best con experience we can have. Everyone gets their turn on stage, there's no need to try and hog any more of the limelight, Veruca Salt style. Oh, and if you’re reading this and not getting that reference, (a) you shouldn’t be on my blog because you’re far too young, (b) look it up, and if you still don’t get what I’m saying… well then please refer to point (a). Thank you, kindly!

There was a time in Kripke's era where Cas was - I feel - intentionally used as a pawn by the writers to divert *canon* from the ‘questionable’ relationship between Sam and Dean, i.e. Wincest focus. Prior to that people (other fans) lightened up and just accepted the fact that Wincest had been there since day one in terms of the writing of the show and the fandom. All the cast and crew knew - J2, Kripke and JDM in particular - and made light of it, never judging, never shaming and often encouraging it because they understand it’s a fun part of fandom. Wincest was present enough to be part of the not so subtle subtext, as I said people just accepted it. Kink tomato was alive and well, so was ‘don’t like, don’t read’ and we all just scrolled over things we didn’t like without turning everything into a personal vendetta and excuse for bullying others who didn’t share our views. When the angels came into the plot I think most of us Wincest fans gave the Dean/Cas innuendos the small laugh they deserved and then turned back to the focus of the show which was the brothers, as it had always been intended. Misha, however, milked those moments as much as possible which was amusing at the start but got old *very* quickly, not just for fans (shippers and non shippers alike), but for other actors, in particular Jensen who is on record MULTIPLE times showing his dislike for Destiel. He told people outright that's not how he was playing the relationship between the two characters and CATEGORICALLY said "Destiel doesn't exist" but did it end there? No, it did not because neither fans or Misha let it go, in fact Misha only pushed more, goaded fans into flogging the same dead horse as much as possible. He’s never stopped, not even when there was so much discord in the fandom, a huge wedge was driven into it because of ships, which IMO he heavily contributed to.

Fast forward to over a decade later (a decade, seriously man, let it fucking go!) he didn’t even stop when Destiel did partially go canon. I have never doubted that Cas loved Dean (Sam, too) because in SPN lore angels are made to love, even rebellious ones. I, along with many others, liked that about Cas because who doesn't love a rebel, especially one rebelling for very good reasons, and because of those two wonderful men? Sam and Dean allowed him to see beyond what he'd been brainwashed to believe his entire existence. The fact is that although the nature of that love changed for Cas, it never did for Dean and was CANONICALLY UNREQUITED because Dean was incapable of loving anyone else as much as he loved Sam. All that mattered to Dean, even when he saw other characters as "family" was still Sam…ALWAYS Sam, every step of the way. Again for those who have too much Misha shaped wax in their ears, that’s canon. Whether people choose to see that love platonically or romantically is up to them, soulmates don't always have to be romantic, either way, brotherly love won out above all else on the show. No amount of Misha screaming ‘hey look, Destiel!’ changed that, but it sure didn’t stop him trying, did it?

So now that the obvious has been stated, here's something else we all know - never once in all of the years on the show did Misha drop rallying of the troops to his precious, ego stroking ship. Never once (that I am aware of) has he called out his Minions and Hellers on their continued harassment of everyone involved in the show and other fans despite the fact that they have bullied, victimised and wished bodily harm, rape and death on people who don't see their ship and because didn't get the ending to the story that they wanted. Not once has Misha shown any remorse for the trauma his "fans" have caused, and I’m taking REAL trauma, here, not the kind Twitter stans see as ‘triggering’ - people have been driven to close SM accounts, attempted, and in some cases succeeded in taking their own lives. These Minions have openly mocked Jared’s struggles with depression and anxiety, and Misha - who claims to be friends with J2 and be supportive of them in every way  - has stood by and let it all play out, knowing full well some of the goings on, if not the full extent of how toxic these people are. We know he sees things being said online, and I have absolutely no doubt he spends time online searching his name for things that are relevant in some way to him in an effort to insert himself into a current conversation, or even start one so that attention is on him. Gotta stay relevant, somehow, right, Mish?

He has actively encouraged bullying by his actions of enabling the behaviours above, both by the flogging of the aforementioned dead horse, AND by not objecting to unacceptable behaviours. Remember when Minions and Hellers were slating J2, particularly Jared, for not posting on SM about BLM and other topics? Yeah, he didn’t ask them to stop doing that, either, even when he was tagged in things along the lines of ‘If Misha can post why can’t J2?’ etc. There have been some token protests, con vids I've seen have show his 'objections' which IMO have been done in a very tongue in cheek way, meaning that those people who needed to be pulled aside and told to change their ways just carried on, because their evil overlord didn’t explicitly explain it in terms a three year old could understand that bullying and forcing your opinion on others is WRONG. Not all of his cult are young and impressionable, not by a long shot, but many of the more vocal and vitriolic ones are.

As a father himself I wonder what Misha would do if he found out that his kids were behaving in ways his Minions are? I’m aware they’re young, but kids are cruel and bullying doesn’t just happen online. Even at whatever age they are, would he laugh it off the way he appears to have done with all of this fandom toxicity? Not bloody likely! I wonder if he’s as desperate to gain the approval of his family, friends and colleagues as he appears to be for that of his Minions/Hellers? I would certainly hope so, but that question can only be answered by Misha, himself, and I can and will not presume to speak on someone else's behalf on things in their personal life. For the record I would never presume I know what J2's answers would be on anything, however I do feel that after 15 years I have an accurate gauge on what kind of people they are so would be confident that any opinion I had on a matter aligns with their morals and ethics. As much as J2 have shared of themselves with us - willingly and under no pressure to do so, I might add - we don't *know* them, but we know enough to have an informed opinion. I can’t say the same for Misha because based on the behaviour he’s repeatedly displayed, things I've heard about from other fans as well as people I know IRL who have had direct dealings with him through cons or GISH (including some very actively in the early days when it was GISHWHES) he just hasn’t seemed like a person I wanted to follow on SM. I’ve never watched any of his solo panels, though I have watched ones with both or one of the J's, mostly being left irritated because of his behaviour. Watching the J’s put up with that shit is painful, and it’s a testament to how good they are as actors that they managed to hide at least some of their disdain for as long as they did. Microexpressions give them away, particularly Jensen, and they certainly have faces I have spent many years watching closely. Beautiful faces to go with beautiful souls, both of them! <3

I have precisely ZERO interest in Destiel as a ship, very little interest in Cas as a character anymore (though I did like him in the early days,and his relationship with Jack in late seasons) so I have absolutely no reason or desire to follow anything Misha does. That said, I've obviously been peripherally aware of some things he's been involved in because of friends, from things I’ve seen on SM and general fandom stuff. Despite the things I've already mentioned about his behaviour, up until now I have been able to maintain a level of respect for him as a person because of the humanitarian and charity work he's done. He seems like someone who really does want to change the world for the better and I am in full support of that fact, so much so that I have supported TWO campaigns relating to him. I bought one of the Super Good t-shirts for the campaign he did with Michael Sheen (a true angel!), the SPN/Good Omens x-over to help homeless charities, and I chose the design with text only and not artwork of Michael and Misha on, basically because I didn’t want to be wearing something with Misha’s face on it and I make absolutely no apology for that, whatsoever. I also bought Alex's #TheEndHasNoEnd shirt, which some of the profits went to Random Acts who do great work, so again, despite not liking Misha I still willingly contributed for a cause bigger than me, and to support Alex, who I absolutely ADORE. I'm aware that Stands aren't popular with some of the fandom, however since most of the cast of SPN are happily affiliated with them then I don't feel it's my place to either judge, or to discuss topics I know next to nothing about. But I digress, as a decent human being I have shown support tangentially to a man who I don't care for out of respect for the work he does outside the fandom. Telling you this isn’t to paint myself in a good light - I don’t need your approval, I’m a big girl, unlike some I don’t need constant validation! - only to provide background on how I’ve actively *not* hated on Misha.

Now though, any respect I had for him has come to an abrupt end, the events of the past 24 hours has seen to that. Whilst I have been annoyed at his behaviour in regards to shipping, I don't feel it's ever gone this far, or at least not that I've seen first hand. This man has, IMO, contributed to so much toxicity in the fandom by way of things I've mentioned before, he's claimed - without actually saying the words - that Wincest fans weren't interested in him as a character when he came onto the show, and hasn’t felt included because of the fans’ love of the brothers. Um, hate to break it to you, love, but when you come onto an established show that is about two people, and you’re a *guest star* you can’t expect everyone to love you. Some characters we as individuals do fall in love with straight away (Bobby, Charlie, Crowley and Rowena are good examples for me), it takes time to establish a dynamic, so if that’s how he felt then it was incredibly naive of him as an actor to expect instant acceptance from anyone. Also, why wait until after the show finished to bring it up AGAIN … oh wait, yeah, that would be to step back into the limelight in a way intended to garner sympathy from Minions and INTENTIONALLY piss off bro fans and Wincest shippers alike? How fucking self centred, desperate and disrespectful do you have to be to shit all over the finale of a show that for the most part accepted you and kept you in paid work for 12 years? Well, Misha Collins levels of all of those things, obviously.  

So, on the topics of self centred, desperate to stay relevant, attention seeking and being oh so needy, the tweet yesterday from Amazon mentioned Castiel. He wasn’t tagged in it, so I refer to my earlier comment about searching online, because how else would he have possibly seen that? It’s possible someone sent it to him, I appreciate that, but if we go off past behaviour it’s not any stretch at all to believe that didn’t happen. So, once again, having seen the tweet he took it upon himself to - oh so predictably - turn it into something relating to Destiel. When I saw it I immediately rolled my eyes and thought ‘here we go again’, but then also had a little smile because I really liked the fact that he explicitly mentioned Wincest, therefore seeming to accept that his poor old dead horse wasn’t the only one in the race. I actually mentally tipped my hat to him then because it appeared that he’s matured enough to acknowledge by name the ship that predates his inclusion on the show. Great, I thought, this is a positive thing in a sea of negativity surrounding the man and his sunken ship, because what followed was Wincest trending in the US (it may also have been other countries as well but I had to sleep!) … largely due to the fact that Hellers were responding to it, calling him out on mentioning the dreaded ‘W’ word. I’ll repeat that because it’s been a rare occurrence up to that point… the Minions were actually disappointed with their overlord for mentioning another ship. We all know what they think of it and I for one, don’t give a flying fuck about their opionion. Ship and let ship, it’s all fun (or meant to be) so we have different tastes, that’s life kiddiwinks, deal with it. I mean, you really don’t have much of an example set for you when your king has proven several times over to be one of the biggest obnoxious brats out there, but just give it a try for your own sakes, yeah? Awesome, good on you, besties!

An unexpected development - to my joy and that of other Wincest shippers - them doing that got the topic trending, only *kept* trending by the fact that were all coming online asking why it was trending. Wincest shippers barely lifted a finger, we just flooded each other’s timelines with lovely content and basked in the Hellers - and Misha - shooting themselves in the foot, which was awesome. But did the vitriol stop? No. Did he get the attention he so clearly craves? Yes. Was it in the way he wanted? Fuck no, so poor, emotionally wounded baby backtracked after seeing that his name was trending alongside Wincest because that’s *so* not what someone narcissistic to do it in the first place, wanted.

Now here’s where I could easily have just moved on with an unusually fond chuckle, giving him an ironic pat on the back and a ‘thanks, Misha’ for being the one to instigate hours of fun, but once again his despicable behaviour made that impossible. It’s been more than obvious for many years that he cares more about what his fans think than anything else to do with the show and the fandom in a larger sense, but to delete the tweet and APOLOGISE for daring to be so insensitive to the snowflakes’ delicate sensibilities for mentioning Wincest in the first place was absolutely disgusting. Stating , “I used a term that I had never really given any thought to other than, "that's a thing?! Yuck." is not only complete and utter bullshit, it’s pandering of the highest order.  

We all know he has referred to Wincest on multiple occasions, so to say he hadn’t thought about is a flat out lie, which IMO is an insult to everyone, not just Wincest shippers. Does the man have no self respect at all, why would you contradict yourself in the face of such overwhelming evidence? Instead of either ignoring all the people calling him out, or addressing it with another tweet saying ‘yeah, that happened’ or something similar he chose, I repeat, CHOSE the route of claiming he didn’t realise he was being offensive to people who felt ‘triggered’ by him using the word Wincest. He basically shat all over an entire ship and large sector of the fandom in an attempt to appease his own fan base which consists of a lot of children (or those that act like children) who have no idea what RL is like.

Once again, he’s reinforced the idea that if you shout loud enough at someone just because you don’t like something they said, they will back down and apologise for something even when there’s nothing to apologise for. If he wants to be such a role model then he could easily have pointed out that a fictional ship doesn’t condone RL incest, any ACTUAL trauma people have suffered because of RL situations, and made an effort to make sure people understand that. He COULD have used it as an opportunity to do some good in the fandom by encouraging people to build bridges, to accept that people are entitled to their beliefs and that sometimes we see things differently but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t treat others with BASIC HUMAN DECENCY because of it. Instead he YET AGAIN chose to show that he cares more about what Minions think of him, keeping them onside to constantly stroke his unbelievably fragile ego in everything he does.

It is my understanding that Misha is big on (or claims to be big on) putting positive energy out into the world, treating people with respect, helping others and accepting people for who they are, not who you want them to be… all this after YEARS of consistently practising what he preaches only when it suits him. He sends out a message that it’s perfectly OK to bully, to spread hate, to draw attention to yourself at the cost of others, to throw colleagues and friends under the bus and at the same time use them to further your own agenda and get hits for your YouTube channel. Is this really the legacy he wants to leave? Is this an environment he wants his own kids to grow up in as well as future generations? Is this what he thinks is a valuable contribution as a human being? JFC, the arrogance, hypocrisy and the need for constant validation this man exhibits is nothing short of cringeworthy… actually it’s beyond that. It’s deplorable behaviour, it’s not new, and he will continue to act like this for as long as he’s being enabled and this harmful cycle needs to end.

I have friends IRL and online who are (now, possibly, were) big Misha fans, who have supported him from either the beginning of his run on the show, or since they started watching, and this is how he repays this behaviour? He’s willfully alienating decent people (including multishippers) all to make himself look good by being seen to do everything he can not to offend people. Spoiler alert, you DID offend people, you continue to do so time and again and we’ve had enough. I can’t imagine how exhausting it must be to be such a perpetual people pleaser, but let me say it’s not doing you any favours in any way, shape or form.

Misha, you are *not* a role model, you’re *not* someone to look up to when you can't live up to the ideals you preach. You’re spitting in the face of people who have supported you even after some questionable things in the past, who gave you the benefit of the doubt because we’re all human and we all make mistakes. The key to growing as a person is not to keep repeating the same mistakes over and over, understanding *why* what you said and/or did was a mistake and making a concerted effort to make changes. I don’t ever see you doing that, you will continue down this path of only caring about Minions under the guise of caring for people in general. You are transparent, you are sad and despite the fact I’ve never particularly liked you, I didn’t speak up because I didn’t want to get involved in the drama. Well now I have spoken up and I’m saying you’re a disgrace, you have no respect for other people and nobody is fooled anymore. If it hadn’t been this tweet it would have been something else, but I for one am glad it happened so soon after the show ended so we can finally be rid of the limpet-like behaviour. It’s over, let it go for the sake of what dignity you might have left, for the sake of your family and friends and for the sake of anyone who isn’t capable of seeing through your ‘it’s a joke’ mentality.

You have been weighed, you have been measured and you have been found wanting. Fuck you and the horse you rode in on, Misha.

For anyone who made it to the end of my ramble, thank you. This has been a cathartic exercise and I’m drawing a line under it now, I don’t think I could possibly make my thoughts any clearer. I urge you not to get caught up in any petty squabbles with his Minions, let’s celebrate J2 and other cast and crew members who have shown us all respect and who I am proud to call part of the SPN family. There’s always one member of the family who needs to be frozen out for the good of everyone else.

[imthepunchlord]

Do you have any thoughts on how the guardian role is handled lore wise? Would you change much about being the guardian?

Oh yes I do and there's so much that I would change up.

The more we see of the Guardians, the dumber they are and the more pointless they are. To a point it's a wonder if they were worth the inclusion as they don't amount to much and are just useless. I'm putting this undercut as I just go off.

- Lore wise, they set it up that adults are naturally more powerful, so why did Fu pick two kids to fight his battles for him? Why not adults? Why did he leave them on their own instead of offering them some means to have an edge over HM?

- Of the Ladybug and Cat, we have yet to see anything unique that the Cat brings to these fights that the other 15 miraculi that Fu has with him couldn't do. You need a distraction that's going to mess up the akuma? Monkey and Fox. You need a protector/aggressor? Bee, Turtle, or Dragon. Ladybug is a must as its the only cleanser so far and has ML to boot, but Cat doesn't need to be out there, and as soon as HM had quite publicly stated that he wants LB and Cat, Fu should've reclaimed the Cat immediately to secure its safety and that HM won't get both. Another or two could go out to replace it.

- Why was picking Adrien a good idea? If Fu had just arrived in Paris, ok, but Backwarder reveals he's been living in Paris for a while. And with that, he's seen Adrien's face everywhere.s Adrien is potentially the most well known kid in Pari. Technically, for Fu's want of secrecy, why pick the most iconic face in Paris to get a miraculous? That sets up one of your heroes to always have attention on him. Fu picking Adrien doesn't make any logical sense.

- Why is Fu ok with endangering one kid but not the other? Why does Marinette get a test set up that risks her life and Fu's if it hadn't gone well and Adrien just helps an old man up, a common decency that most would do. It's like two extreme differences that don't work well in comparison as Marinette gets the risky test and Adrien it looks like he got his miraculous on a silver platter as he got the far easier one that takes the least effort to be a decent human being.

- Fu being a terrible mentor and hero picker in general and the whole shebang with Syren. If Adrien is not meeting his standards or if he doesn't trust Adrien at all, why is Adrien being allowed to continue as a hero? Or if he really wants Adrien to stay, why isn't he doing anything about Adrien? Why isn't he telling Plagg to encourage Adrien to step up and get serious? If he can take on the role of being Adrien's Chinese teacher, why not do that to try and guide Adrien to improvement so he can also be trusted with Guardian secrets too and truly help Marinette out. He's got two options when he doesn't trust Adrien or finds that he's meeting his standards: he takes the miraculous back or he addresses this issue himself.

- I also call big BS about him not doing anything at all when he comes upon Adrien detransformed on the roof with Plagg. Cause he's risking himself going out to find Chat Noir only to find him detransformed. That realistically should raise some brows and concern him. Adrien at least should've gotten a lecture or warning.

- Also the reveal that kwamis aren't allowed to know about their own power. that to me is off putting. It really stresses that kwamis are beneath them, these very ancient and powerful beings that have probably seen a lot. And canon validates it by making them children (which to me is the writers being lazy so they don't have to do complex characters).

- The whole thing with Fu's backstory. Dumbest backstory I've ever heard and it just paints Guardians in a really bad light, and by extension, real life monks. Monks didn't go to people's homes to take children. If they did take kids with them, those kids had nowhere else to go and offered them a place to stay until old enough to be on their own. And that test, omg, wtf. Ok, I can get the idea of a test of temptation, but there are other ways to perform it without starving a kid. Especially leaving said kid alone unsupervised with 19 powerful miraculi two of which have wish granting abilities. How would the Guardians even know if Fu used a miraculous as they left him alone with mriaculi. If Fu wanted to, he could've made a wish to never be picked.

- Fu didn't even do shit when he finally had a chance to face off against HM. He just sat in his damb ball and allowed himself to get knocked around. At least try and roll over him! Be a ping-pong ball! DO SOMETHING. Like, why did you even pick Turtle??? Turtle wasn't able to do anything against Butterfly! I thought it could as Fu had been ready to go in Origins, plus the 5 are based off Wu Xing, by set up, Fox and Turtle should have some sort of an edge over the Butterfly. But I guess that means there could be other options aside form LB and we can't have that, Marinette's miraculous needs to be the only thing to take on the Butterfly to really stress on the fact that it comes down to only her.

- The memory wipe thing that's an apparently must when you retire from being the Guardian. Honestly I think that should've been saved as a last resort if you're ever captured and could be forced to leak info, not when you retire. Doing so removes a valid source of advisement that a new Guardian can rely on. History is there to learn from it and this tradition removes a source of history to learn from, either from having guidance or seeing what the old did and how you want to change things. This also makes me concerned as I see Adrien taking advantage of an amnesiac Marinette.

- I went off about the NY Special revealing there's more Orders here.

- And lastly, Su-Han, the other Guardian to see aside from Fu. And with him, it solidifies how stupid they all are. When the Butterfly is being misused in Paris, why is someone aggressive and judgmental coming to Paris? Why is this guy even working with kids when he doesn't like kids? And the reveal that Guardians don't use miraculi at all. That just makes that test all the dumber with testers being unsupervised. And for Guardians not meant to use miraculi, how come Marinette gets a nice perk as LB that she can pull a miraculous out of her yo-yo? They're probably playing that she's "the first" to do so but realistically, I'm pressing x to doubt. In the long history of miraculi and when Guardians were around, you expect me to believe that Guardians never used miraculi themselves? What if there was no one to turn to, do they just the disaster happen? ...Well, based on how terrible canon is setting them up, I wouldn't be surprised.

SO.

There is a lot I would change up about the Guardians and for this, I'll adjust canon.

- Adrien gets the ring another way, maybe a gift from his mom or aunt or grandparents. Realistically, there's no logical reason for Fu to pick Adrien. He just has too much attention on him and Chat being an unexpected miraculous user can make him wary, adding to him only trusting Marinette.

- I'd have Fu be more present in Marinette's life, a customer who comes in a lot. This way he can offer advise when needed but not take away from Tikki. And this has him more closely keeping an eye on things.

- I'd change up Fu's backstory. He got separated from his family in a flood, the previous Turtle saved him, tried to help him find his family and with no luck, took him to the Temple, but only the section where other orphans are where they work to help take care of it, oblivious to the miraculous near them. After a year, Fu is one of the few selected to be entrusted with miraculous knowledge. He's surprised but not all that for it as he'd rather go find his family still. Idk how Temple falls but its not that. That was just dumb and avoidable.

- I wouldn't have Adrien meet Fu at all. In truth, it actually could've been cut out entirely as Adrien meeting Fu didn't amount to anything. He doesn't help with Guardian duties, doesn't help pick heroes, hasn't stepped up at all in his role as a partner. And he's not as torn up about Fu's loss as Marinette is. Adrien meeting Fu was pointless in the grand scheme of things. Nothing was progressed or changed from Adrien meeting Fu.

- I'd have HM ONLY getting an edge on Fu because Mayura was there to help him, catching Fu off guard. I want to see the Turtle truly in action, to see what else it can do cause sitting there to be smacked around was just unimpressive. And if Asstruck even did as much research as he could, he'd know that in Chinese mythology, the Turtle is a boss. It's the keeper of history and symbol of immortality, and it's up there with Tiger as an animal that can go toe to toe with the Dragon. And of the Four Symbols (associated with 4 seasons), the Black Turtle is also known as the Black Warrior. There should've been a lot more to Turtle than just sitting in your shell and allowing yourself to be knocked around.

- Su-Han I'd drastically change up. I'd keep in him being critical and stern, but he approaches things smartly and patiently. Before he dives into aggression and accusations, he wants to know what's going on. Why does this 14 yo have the Miracle Box? How was the Butterfly obtained and misused? And what the hell is going on??? How are these people so small and how did they get into this thin glass box?? Computer? What's a computer??? Essentially, have fun with the fact that Su-Han is essentially a time traveler and one great bonding experience to have with Marinette while also offering some good comedy is him learning about the modern time and her acting as his guide. Su-Han can give her guidance that Fu hadn't been able to give, and Marinette can offer her own in a way that Su-Han will need. Which by extension could remove Marinette having a near mental breaking point and revealing herself to Alya, and could avoid some of that drama of what's coming.

- Speaking of which, Adrien. I'd use Su-Han to finally address the issues with Adrien as a hero and partner. Su-Han prioritized Marinette as she has the Miracle Box, but Adrien is someone he'd take the miraculous away from. Adrien would get a very clear warning and call out for his actions and role.

[entertainment]

Entertainment Spotlight: Josh Thomas, Everything’s Gonna Be Okay

After making his mark as an award-winning and hugely successful stand-up comedian and television panelist, Josh Thomas turned his hand to writing, acting and co-executive producing his own television show for ABC TV, inspired by his life and his comedy, called Please Like Me. Following the success of Please Like Me in Australia and the US, Josh went on to create, write, star, and produce Everything’s Gonna Be Okay, which recently made its premiere in the US on Freeform and received widespread critical acclaim. Josh took the time to answer our questions about Everything’s Gonna Be Okay, bugs, and more:

How does the final result of Everything’s Gonna Be Okay Season 1 compare to your initial draft of the show? Any major changes or additions?

I am not really sure what we would call the initial draft of the show. Before writing a script, we have to pitch the season outline, then episode outlines, then scene breakdowns then we write the first of 4 official drafts for each episode. Internally (between me, the writers, other producers and the studio) we do about 3 drafts of each step. That’s like… 24 drafts before we get the shooting script.

Then, on set we shoot each scene about 12 different ways, and that gets given to one of our editors and they do the editor’s cut. Then the director does their cut and then I get to do my first of 3 cuts.

All of these steps are usually hundreds of pretty minor changes, but it has a big result.

At every step I try and ignore what we thought about the episode before, and view it with fresh eyes.

I like, honestly can’t remember when we made any major changes and additions.

If you could take a masterclass on any subject, what would you learn and who would you want to teach you (e.g. a cooking class with Gordon Ramsay)?

I wish I understood lighting in photography and cinematography better! It’s the most bamboozling part of being on set to me.

Who would I get to teach me though?

Umm, Ezra Miller. I know he wouldn’t be good at teaching me but honestly, I’d prefer to hang out with Ezra Miller than to do learning.

Which episode of Everything’s Gonna Be Okay Season 1 was your favorite to make, and which was your favorite to watch?

The finale is set in NY and that is just a real dream. I can’t believe they let me get away with that. So, that was my favourite to make.

My favourite to watch is Episode 9 - there is a lesbian love story with two of our autistic characters and also caterpillars and it just makes me so happy.

What inspired the bug theme in Everything’s Gonna Be Okay?

Well, I was in the shower with a boy I liked and he was leaving me to live in the bush and study grasshoppers and I just thought that was so charming so I stole it for my character.

Also, I got some pet bugs and were just obsessed with them. They are so precious and interesting but people never give them a chance!

Were any scenes or moments from the show based on your own experiences?

Just one… there is a scene in an all-inclusive resort where I throw ceviche on my boyfriend’s head as a joke and he gets so mad at me and then we have a drunk fight. It happened, I did it to a boy. I saw the love drain out of his eyes.

If you could give one of the characters a spinoff series, who would it be and what would the series be about?

I can’t answer that! If I chose one the rest of the cast will riot. (The answer is Tellulah, obviously)

Can you tell us some of the other titles that you considered for the show before landing on Everything’s Gonna Be Okay?

None! Everyone just accepted it.

I took it from a scene in Please Like Me.

In your opinion, what’s the most interesting thing about you that people may not know?

I’ve done like 6 one-hour solo shows and written 32 episodes of TV based on my life so like… I don’t really have any secrets left.

People are always shocked by how messy I am which shocks me in return because like, don’t I seem like such a mess? I thought so.

What’s next for you?

Hopefully another Season of Everything's Gonna Be Okay! If not then like… a heavily discounted holiday thanks to COVID-19.

Thanks for taking the time, Josh! Catch the season one finale of Everything’s Gonna Be Okay tonight at 8:30p/7:30c on Freeform. For more content, check out the Everything’s Gonna Be Okay Tumblr!

[voldemorts-tap-shoes]

Sneak peek alert 👀

As part of a new genre we have started in the Romione discord (which you should totally join HERE if you haven’t already) that takes our favorite duo and puts them in iconic rom-com AUs, I was volunteered by the wonderful @be11atrixthestrange to write Ron and Hermione as a badass undercover team, and of course, I couldn’t resist.

Here’s a little snippet from the first chapter, and for more ROM-ione-COM goodness, be sure to check out @adenei and @accio-broom ‘s latest too!

***

“All the blokes in the Aurors, and I’m the one going on a couples retreat,” Ron grumbled, heading for the cafeteria. “Remind me again how I got stuck with this assignment?”

“Ironically, because you’re the only one with high enough clearance who's single,” Harry pointed out. “Not sure Ginny, or any of the other wives for that matter, would take too kindly to their husbands going on holiday with another woman. Even if it is just pretend.”

“That’s all well and good, but those last few were from the training class. I may as well not even have a partner on this for all the good it’ll do me to take one of them.” Ron grabbed a ready-made sandwich and a gillywater and headed for the checkout counter.

Harry rolled his eyes, trailing behind with his afternoon tea. “You’ll have a partner. You’ll be fine. Look, of the lot, which one would you be least likely to turn your wand on before the mission is over? That’s really all you’ve got to ask yourself.”

“Oh, real helpful, Harry,” Ron retorted sarcastically.

“Oh, I hope that’s not a theme today,” a familiar voice piped up behind them. Hermione had snuck up with a cup of tea in one hand and a file in the other, brandishing the latter at Harry. “Harry, we’ve got to go over your testimony for the Peterson trial. It’s next week.”

“We’ll get to it,” Harry said, taking the file and tucking it dismissively under his arm.

“You’ve been saying that for three days,” Hermione replied impatiently, snatching it back and opening it in front of him. “I’ve finally had to resort to tracking you two down at your ritualistic afternoon snack.”

“Stalking me, are you, Hermione?” Ron teased.

She winked back. “You wish.”

“Oh, come on, we both know you can’t resist me.”

“In your dreams.”

“Hang on.” Harry looked up from the file, glancing between the two of them. “Hermione, d’you s’pose that you could help Ron out with a little problem he’s having?”

Ron caught the gleam in Harry’s eye immediately. “No.”

Hermione looked up at him, her face full of innocent concern. “What’s going on, Ron? Is everything okay?”

“Everything’s fine. Harry’s just going to head back to his office and read over the Peterson file, aren’t you?” Ron said pointedly, though Harry was steadfastly ignoring him.

“Come on, it’s a perfect solution.”

“Oh, I could think of a few reasons why it’s not.”

Hermione crossed her arms, still looking at Ron, and gave a beleaguered sigh. “Anytime the two of you would like to fill me in would be wonderful.”

“Number one being, she’s not even an Auror,” Ron continued to Harry, ignoring Hermione for the time being. “What is Robards going to say?”

“You know, I’m very happy in my chosen career, but I’m oddly offended by that, and you could at least tell me why.”

Ron sighed and turned back to Hermione. “Robards has got a lead on that new cell of Death Eaters we’ve been looking for. Thinks they’re using this resort down at Brighton Beach as a sort of headquarters, and he wants to send a team to investigate, try and get some intel on what they’re planning.”

Hermione frowned thoughtfully. “That doesn’t sound so bad. How can I help?”

“It’s a couples resort. One of those swanky all-inclusive sort of places. I’ve been interviewing potential fake wives all afternoon to take with me on the mission.”

“Interviewing?” Harry scoffed. “What an unromantic way to talk about how you met your future wife.”

“Right, because nearly got her killed by a troll is a better how we met story?” Ron retorted with a vague gesture at Hermione.

“Technically, how we met is that I was looking for a lost toad, but I suppose the troll story is a bit more interesting to share with the other guests.” Hermione smiled at him.

“Wait, you...would you actually do this with me?” Ron asked incredulously. On the one hand, Hermione was his best friend; he trusted her with his life, and had done, quite literally, on plenty of occasions. Though she hadn’t chosen the Auror path as he and Harry had, Ron knew that she was more than capable in the field, and would be a suitable partner with him on this case.

On the other hand, going on a couples vacation, even a fake one, with the woman who was also his ex-girlfriend was surely a very terrible idea.

***

Stay tuned for the full chapter coming soon!

[snakebites-22]

My Favorite Color is You

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A/N: This is my first Peter Parker fic and first fic on this site. I really hope you like it and feedback is welcome but don’t be a bully please. Thank you @dreamofaprilsblog​ for the prompts “Do you need to go to the hospital?” and soulmate AU. Sorry for this being a day late, but I hope you still enjoy it anyways. 

Warnings: fire, almost mugging, burns, hospitals, slight angst, petty teenagers, mentions of a person being followed (comment if there’s anything else I should add)

Word Count: 3175

Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader

Summary: Peter Parker is very desperate to find you, his soulmate. He’s looked for you in every person he makes eye contact with. Guys, girls, he’s looked for you in everyone. Well, one fateful patrol leads him to discover his new favorite color. 

Side note: I tried to make this as gender inclusive as possible so I used “they” to describe the reader’s pronouns, but just imagine your own whenever “they” is used if it isn’t your pronoun. Peter is bi in this story. If there is a point where I accidentally specify a gender please let me know so I can fix it. Enjoy! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Peter knew about soulmates. He’s read about them in books, learned about famous soulmates in class, and even heard about them in real time from people lucky enough to find theirs. He, of course, was not that lucky. Stupid Parker luck. He knew from what he’s heard and learned that the world actually isn’t dull shades of gray with black and white, but it actually had color. Real vibrant colors like red and purple and green, things his brain didn’t have the capacity to imagine. He knew that all it took was eye contact with the right person to change his world. Too bad he hadn’t found those eyes just yet. 

He was sitting on top of a random apartment building while on his usual nightly patrol bored out of his freaking mind. There just wasn’t anything good tonight. He helped a little girl get her kite down from a tree and one man needed help catching his dog who had gotten off his leash, and yeah he was a cute dog, but he could be doing something better. He could be finding you. Of course, he didn’t know who you were yet. Just a bright, beautiful figment of his imagination, and his heart ached for you. Was that even possible? To long for someone he wasn’t even sure existed? Well, guess it is because he’s living proof of the pitiful feeling. 

A loud yell shook him from his depressing thoughts and he jumped up quickly. 

“Finally,” he muttered with a small grin as he shot a web in the direction the yell had come from. He swung as quickly as his agile body allowed and soon landed down on the pavement in front of an alleyway. He looked around cautiously and could feel the prickling sensation that was his Peter t- Spider Sense. It was his Spider Sense. He shook his head a bit and tried to remain focused as he crept down the dark passage. 

 “I don’t want any trouble, lady,” Peter heard a low voice hiss from the gloom. “Just want whatever cash and shit you got on ya. Don’t be a bitch about it.” 

Peter scowled and kept walking until he was able to make out two figures in the dim light the street lamps provided. A young woman, maybe late teens or early twenties, was pinned up against a wall while a man who was obviously older stood before her, a small knife in his right hand. 

Peter sighed softly. “Y’know,” he started as the criminal dude jumped. “If you want money you should probably just get a job like a normal person. I hear the Burger King down the street is hiring.” 

The guy quickly turned around and tried to slash at Spider-Man with the knife which the boy effortlessly ducked and grabbed his assailant's arm, twisting just enough that he dropped his knife. The man grunted in pain and swung at him again, but Spider-Man dodged and countered with a kick to the man’s abdomen. The force of the kick sent him flying back into the opposite alley wall and before he had time to even look up, the young hero webbed him to the dirty brick. 

“Karen?” Peter whispered softly.

“The police are on their way Peter. Good job,” the AI responded.

Peter smiled beneath the mask. “Hey, thanks.” 

The boy turned around to see the girl still standing against the wall, breathing deeply. His heart jumped a bit as he realized that she was about his age, and also very pretty. Try as he might to keep it down, hope surged in his chest as he made his way over to her. 

“Excuse me, miss? Are you okay? Do you need to go to the hospital?” He asked quickly as he did a small glance over her.

“No, I believe I’m alright. Thank you Spider-Man,” she breathed out. 

She slowly looked up at him and Peter looked into her eyes and-

Nothing… they remained a light grey color just like the rest of his surroundings. He couldn’t help the small disappointed sigh that left his lips before he forced himself into a smile. 

“That’s good. I’m glad. Um… do you live far from here? I could walk you home if you want.” 

The girl shook her head and gave him a tiny, hesitant smile. “My car is right down the street. I was walking there so that I could get to the library where my girlfriend is probably waiting for me when that guy grabbed me. Speaking of her, I should probably get going. Thank you again.” She smiled hesitantly and waved to him before walking away and taking out her phone, probably to call this girlfriend. 

Peter sighed again and watched her to make sure she got to her car before looking back at the man webbed to the wall. “Does everyone have a soulmate except for me?” he questioned without really expecting an answer. Nevertheless, the almost mugger shrugged anyway. 

Peter scowled before jumping up and climbing the alley wall. He stood on the roof and waited there until the police arrived to take the guy into custody, and once they were gone so was Spider-Man. 

-------------------------

Peter entered his bedroom through the open window and crawled along his ceiling until he was over top of his loft bed. Looking over his shoulder to make sure he didn’t accidentally fall onto the floor, which definitely didn’t happen a lot, he let go and flopped onto the bed with a huff. He tugged his mask off of his head and tossed it over the side in a fit of petty anger. 

May, who must have heard him come in, opened the door and gazed up at him. “Long night?” she asked softly to which Peter just shrugged, not in the mood to really talk to anyone. 

“Well, I got us some Chinese food if you’d like it.” Peter heard the door creak behind her as she turned around and walked back towards the rest of the house. He would have preferred to stay in bed, but the incessant growling of his stomach said no, causing him to get up. After changing out of his suit annoyedly, he went out and joined his aunt. 

Aunt May was sitting at their small dinner table with a plate of chow mein, glancing at the TV which was playing the news report of the latest Spidey save. Peter walked over and sat down in his usual seat across from her. When she looked up at him, she smiled sadly.

“I got you some dumplings and noodles. Also they gave me, like, a ton of fortune cookies. I don’t know who needs sixteen fortune cookies, but apparently it’s us.”

“You counted?” Peter asked with a little chuckle.

“Hey. That many fortune cookies needs to be counted,” May retorted with a smile as she saw her nephew laugh. 

They both began eating, Peter slow at first but then diving in once he realized exactly how hungry he was. 

Once they finished eating, Peter helped pack up the leftovers and clean the dishes. As he loaded the dishwasher, Aunt May asked softly, “what’s on your mind tonight? The guy you fought?” 

Peter shook his head and sighed. He finished loading the dishwasher before turning to Aunt May to answer. “No I just… how old were you when you met Uncle Ben? And found out he was your soulmate?” 

Aunt May looked slightly taken aback by this question and pursed her lips a little. She always did that whenever Ben was brought up. “I was 23, I think. Yeah… yeah somewhere around that age. We met at this resort one summer. That’s also where your mom and dad met.” She smiled a little at the memory and Peter watched her with slight pain behind his eyes. “God, when all four of us saw color for the first time, well, we were so surprised of course, but it was really, really amazing. Why do you ask?” 

“I just… nothing. Just curious,” Peter answered with a tight smile. “I think I’m gonna head to bed now. Tired. From the fight.” 

Aunt May nodded and Peter trotted back to his room. Before he reached the door, he heard her call to him from the kitchen. “You’ll find your soulmate Peter. I know it feels like forever and you just want to meet them now, but I promise you’ll find them soon.” Peter glanced back at her before walking into his room without saying another word. 

-------------------------

The next couple of days were a consistent and normal blur. Peter had school, then patrol, then repeat the next day. Everywhere he went he looked around for his soulmate. At one point, this really cute curly haired boy walked past him and he felt his heart skip a beat as he looked into his dark eyes, but nothing again. He sighed in disappointment as the taller boy walked away from him, leaving him to continue his stupid quest. 

That had happened two days ago. Now, Spider-Man was patrolling the city, swinging between buildings. It was a relatively quiet night. He helped this one kid find his mom when he got separated from at a park, and he also walked a young woman back to her apartment because she thought she was being followed. After double checking, it didn’t look like she was, but then again that was probably because the shithead saw Spider-Man and turned around. But all-in-all, it was very quiet and chill. That is, until the explosion happened.

Spider-Man quickly started swinging in the direction the loud sound came from, wondering what the hell that was about. It didn’t take him long to find it. A restaurant he happened to pass by a lot was burning up in giant, pale flames. He jumped down and quickly ran inside the burning building. 

There was fire everywhere. The heat crashed against him like a ferocious wave. It reminded him so much of his fight with the Vulture that he hesitated a second before continuing to run inside. It looked like most of the people had already gotten out or were running for the exits. 

“That way over there,” Spidey yelled to the people running past him. “Is anyone else still in here?” He called out as he ran further into the building. Weak coughing came as a reply. Someone ran up to him and grabbed him while coughing viciously into their arm. 

“Spider-Man,” the person said in harsh breaths. “Please you, you have to help. The back room. My friend－” 

“I’ll get to them. Get yourself to safety.”

They nodded and ran out the building while the young hero ran in the direction the person had gestured to. He could still hear the weak coughing from earlier, but now he was hearing a tiny “help” and “please” that made his heart ache. He dodged out of the way of falling debris and hissed in pain when he backed into a burning metal rod from an overturned table. Still, he pressed on until he reached the backroom. 

The smoke was immense. From the damage it looked like this was the epicenter of the explosion. 

“Hello?” he yelled over the roar of the fire. He wasn’t sure if he could even be heard over everything, but a weak call answered him. 

“O-over here.”

Spider-Man jumped over more burning debris as he frantically looked around. His eyes widened when he finally saw them. A figure lay trapped beneath a large chunk of wood that had once been the ceiling. They looked badly burned and were coughing harshly and breathing in rough, raspy breaths. 

He ran over to them and started to lift up the wood despite the burning in his hands, causing the person below to cry out. Spidey yelled in pain as he managed to lift the debris off of them and throw it to the side. 

He quickly crouched down to look at the person he just rescued, and he was met with the most beautiful pair of e/c orbs to ever exist. His jaw dropped as he quickly ripped off his mask, his mask that was now the most vibrant and bright shade of a color he had only ever heard about. He looked back at you, your eyes impossibly wide as you choked out a small, “you?”

Peter nodded. “Me..let me lift you up okay?” You nodded a tiny bit and whimpered loudly as Peter gently wrapped his arms underneath your battered body, lifting you up into his chest. He winced a little from the pain in his hands and his back, but he pulled his mask back on before running out of the now rapidly collapsing building. 

The fire was so much brighter now. Reds and oranges and yellows. He could see the burning blue curtains hanging in the window. The shades of green and brown and the colorful painting on the wall that were all turning to black and grey ash. How horrifyingly beautiful.

He ran over to where the ambulances were parked and looked around frantically as he saw the EMTs and paramedics treating people and getting the most badly hurt people on stretchers and into the vehicles. 

“Do you need to go to the hospital?” He heard from behind him. He turned around and saw a paramedic looking at him. 

“N-No no but they do,” Spidey stated as he held you tightly to his chest. Your eyelids were nearly closed and your breathing was ragged. 

The paramedic quickly called her team over and they gently took you from his arms. They laid you out on the stretcher and got to work on getting you on a breathing mask and looking at your wounds. His breath caught in his throat as he began to clearly see how bad your wounds were. Harsh red burns covered your skin, especially your lower body where the wood had pinned you down. 

For a moment it was so hard to focus, the sirens and yelling was overwhelming, the bright lights were blinding him, the heat was still so immense, he could hear your heart and your breath so impossibly loud, and just all the colors－

It was all so much he almost didn’t notice the team taking the stretcher you were on away into an ambulance. Taking you away into the ambulance. Away from him. He was not having any of that. They were not taking you away when he just finally found you. Your gorgeous eyes looked at him with fear and desperation as they rolled you away. 

“Wait!” he cried as he followed after them. “Wait please you have to let me come with you. I have to go with them.” 

“Are you family?” an EMT asked him with a puzzled expression. 

“No no I-I’m not but－”

“We’re only allowing family to－”

“I’m their soulmate!” He shouted. “Please. Please don’t take them from me.” 

After a moment, just one single moment where Peter could feel his chest constricting and he could sense your eyes on him and his heart was beating way too fast, the EMT nodded and Spidey joined them in the ambulance. 

He sat down beside your stretcher and gently took your hand. He stared into your eyes that had started to fill with tears, and he very lightly gave your fingers a squeeze despite the sting in his own hand. You offered him the tiniest smile, and then the ambulance drove off, taking both of you with it. 

-------------------------

It had been several hours. You were now laying in a hospital bed with all of your burns bandaged and your wounds attended to as Peter sat in a chair beside you, his own burns taken care of as well. 

Aunt May had stopped by earlier to check on him and also see you. They talked a bit about all of the colors. How bright they were or how dull they were and how your eyes were his new favorite color because, God, how could one thing be so beautiful? However, he couldn’t see your eyes now as you slept peacefully. Instead, he was staring in fascination at the Spider-Man suit. He really went around in such a bright red and blue suit? How has he not been shot and killed yet?

He was shaken out of these thoughts by the sound of the bed sheets rustling. He quickly looked up and was met by his favorite color. He smiled widely and sat up straighter as you offered him a tiny smile. 

“Hi,” he breathed out. 

“Hi,” you whispered back. 

You both stared at one another for a moment that was both awkward and yet somehow comforting. You cleared your throat a tiny bit before murmuring, “Can I have a drink?”

“Drink? Oh uh yeah of course, sorry.” Peter quickly sprang up to get you a glass of water from the water dispenser over in the corner. He walked back over and carefully raised the glass to your lips, your hand coming up to gently rest over his and he would be a huge liar if he said he didn’t blush as red as his suit. 

He set the empty glass down on the bedside table and sat back down in his seat, pulling it a tiny bit closer to your bed. 

“So,” you began softly. “Spider-Man is my soulmate?”

“Yeah, I guess so,” he laughed softly. “My name’s Peter. Parker.”

“Y/n,” you answered. 

He smiled one of the biggest smiles that he’s ever smiled before. It was one of those where it leaves your cheeks aching afterwards. 

“What?” you asked, an eyebrow raised.

He shook his head quickly, his curls bouncing along his hairline. “Nothing just… your name is so perfect. You’re perfect.” 

“You found me in the pits of hell and you’re going to call me perfect? You’re an angel.”

He definitely did not blush at that statement. Nope. Not Peter Parker. 

He laughed a little and looked at you adoringly. He could already tell he was the luckiest guy alive. 

“So, uh, I should probably ask this just to um make it official and all of that,” Peter mumbled after a moment. “Would you like to go out sometime? I mean, obviously once we’re both healed and everything. And… afterwards maybe be my significant other?” 

You laughed a little and Peter felt his face fall and his inside twist up in nervousness. Did he do something wrong? What was happening?

“Yeah, of course. I’d love to go out with you Peter Parker.” 

He beamed widely at you as you smiled back. You both sat for a few minutes in silence and at some point Peter had taken your hand and was gently rubbing circles into it and you both were talking about absolutely anything, but mostly about all the new colors when a nurse walked in. 

“Excuse me, your parents are here. Shall I send them in?”

Peter’s eyes widened as you turned to look at him with a smirk.

“Ready to meet my parents?”

Fuck. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tagging some people who will hopefully like this: @soft-petey​ @quaksvn @itslokes @tommysparker @greenorangevioletgrass @lxilahm @holland-mendes-always-forever @thespydersargon @angel-spidey @angel-holland @th0ttie4tommy @tonguetiedholland @follow-tom-holland-is-spiderman @tcny-stcrks @spideyyeet​ @spider-starry​ @bitchass-slytheriny-snake​ @dreamofaprilsblog

(Redid the tags cuz apparently they didn’t work)

If you want to be added to my taglist or removed just comment and I’d be happy to do so <3

[doctorkatmd]

The Fowl Twins Review

So I read the fowl twins this week and I have 𝓼𝓸𝓶𝓮 𝓽𝓱𝓸𝓾𝓰𝓱𝓽𝓼.

I'll start off with saying, I enjoyed the book. It has Eoin's recognizable ticks anyone who's read his books can expect by now. It has the whole "Acknowledging tropes being used and winking at the camera" thing people mistakenly think that bloke that looks like Deadshot's panty stains invented and describing fantastical settings through the lenses of green glass that smells a bit 𝕨𝕖𝕚𝕣𝕕. He has that amazing ability writing interesting dialogue, something most scrip writers could at least attempt, but why would they when Transformers 45: the explosive leaky oil spill keeps their liquor cabinet stocked. However I think over the years his books have started relying on to much "wink wink nudge nudge see what I did there" sorta joke. You can only admire your cock so long before you start having funny thoughts of removing limbs and trying more advanced contortionism. It feels like Eoin Colfer is locked into a uphill battle with the narrative and character progression, and he dose not have the high ground. See the first Artemis Fowl book was a bit of a anomaly, as he expected it to be a one-off until people realized it was fun for your protagonist to be a bit of a smart arse gremlin with daddy issues, and the book sold like cum hotcakes at a lumberjack orgy. Artemis started out as the bad guy and through the 8 books he went from "really smart guy so far up his own colon he can see his belly button" to "really smart guy really far up his own colon but only just slightly and can leave for vacations". But that's just not in the fowl twins. Myles starts out Luke-warm "smart wise ass with heart of gold" and Becket is and stays a ray of blissful sun shine. They end the book in about the same where they start it, albeit dirtier and smelling a bit like that one time you went into a nursing home and got dreuled on. It's implied that Myles might try and do something the troll but not like 𝓼𝓾𝓹𝓮𝓻 𝓮𝓿𝓲𝓵 just a bit ｑｕｅｓｔｉｏｎａｂｌｅ. I also question the inclusion of a another LEP female spunky officer, Colfer works it into the story well enough plot-wise. But it still feels a but like he didn't want to resort to using holly short again so he made Lazuli, who feels like a "totally original character do not steal" from a fan fiction where Captain Kirk thinks she's totally "hot and smart and should take command of the ship immediately, even thought she's just a cadet." Though she serves as Chekhov's gun the whole time with her wibly wobly magic powers that she totally doesn't have we pinky swear it's supper rare and unlikely. But I can's see why she couldn't have been some fairy tourist or snot nosed 60 year old 𝘗𝘪𝘹𝘦𝘭 kid poking around the fowl estate through pure curiosity, getting her jimmies off to seaweed or whatever. I just don't see a need for another no nonsense, "what rule book" spunky policer officer. Finally, who is this series for? I enjoyed it don't get me wrong. But it still reads as the original series that was intended for children, and my friends look at me funny being in the kid's fiction part of the book store so long. The original audience is currently incurring student debt and eating their toothpaste just to feel something again. One might say "it's for a whole new generation" But see dear viewer/reader I don't think it works for that either, it references characters and events from the original books far too frequently, in fact often even mentioning the books by name in a "if you want to understand this joke your gonna have to be real good and save up your lunch money" sorta way. It's obvious he Eion Colfer wants to write adult books and he's fecken good at it when he does, Highfier was amazing and creative, and allowed him to flex the Irish super power of saying fuck in every conceivable context. All I'm saying is the fowl twins would've been perfect if, just for once, he could let a 13 year old drop a f-bomb one, or two, or three times...........well a lot more actually according to my middle school experience with prepubescent boys dropping swears they heard on violent television, only rivaled by

the swigs of the mysterious bottle the principle kept under her desk, without censoring it to d'arvit, which was funny the first 20 time but got old after eight books. I say all this because I care. I love this author and his unique and funny characters standing out in a crowd of angsty teen characters with bad communication skills a more liberal application of their lips than your mum. I just worry for where this series is gonna take us, and that it's gonna end up like those bleeding spin off shows that sounded good until you realize that one character that seemed rather cool is in fact a right twat nanny and can't carry a whole show.

[jean-does-not-have-a-horseface]

Before Dawn ~Pt4~

I was so so so so so insecure to post this chapter so I only hope you enjoy first smooches with Levs. My requests are always open so if you're in the mood you can always drop by and request anything.

Find the other chapters here

Warnings: mentions of blood and a tad if nudity

As always @hidehaskak

Snow veil

"I'm so cold."

The raging blizzard blows mercilessly onto you and Levi. As tremendously large snowflakes fly to every direction as the wind makes an unbearable howling sound you clutch your one hand closer to Levi's winter cloak. Your lower jaw is radically colliding with your top one as you wrap your other arm around you in hopes of warming up. You can feel Levi tensing up every time a new wave of ice cold snowflakes land on him at the freezing weather and even though he's shaking, much like you, he speaks no words back to you.

He probably feels guilty for being the one to accidentally force your duo into this. After last year's fiasco involving Levi's, Farlan's and Isabel's inclusion to the military without having received proper training Mike had taken upon himself to investigate on any lack of training between both new recrewts as well as older veteran corps members. As a new squad leader and section commander he didn't want to take any chances against the survival of his soldier and you admired that deeply. His compassion and determination were always things that made you trust him blindly whenever Erwin assigned him in command of your old squad.

Therefore the plan was simple; you'd take the route assigned to you in small groups of four and you would head to a training corps base according to map. It should only take three hours to get there by horse and then you were free to relax, always following strict curfews.

But as beneficial as Mike had thought winter training would be he would have never guessed the raging blizzard or the avalanche that separated you and Levi from your groups.

It's had taken an hour for him to try and locate anyone of his team, his flares weren't working due to the hawling wind scattering the smoke around, when he finds you. He watches in horror as you try to cover your face with your arms to protect yourself from the cold, ignoring the necessity of looking at your surroundings and most particularly, ignoring the vast cliff that lays only a few teeny centimeters away from your horse's feet.

Speeding up to catch up to you, Levi hit the sides of his mare in a tender manner with his feet. The horse speeds smoothly for only a few meters, as if there isn't any snow around to be bother by. Levi takes it upon himself to treat his horse to some fresh apples and carrots he has in his bag once this was all over. His mare deserves a little rest and some extra treats for all the excellence and delicacy she carried.

"Hunny no!"

He had only avert his eyes for a fragment of a second when your horse tripped over the edge of the cliff urging you to let out an eardrum piercing screech that made the ravenette run to your direction. With a harsh dry halt his mare stopped on her tracks just at the tip of the cliff in a rather convenient coincidence of time. Had he been a second later how wouldn't have been able to grap your forearm as you shot up in the air. No matter his strength and his quick tactics you had managed to startle him with your despairate scream for your horse as it detached from the stirrup that was stuck to your leg, causing him to let you slip for only just a bit. Nonetheless it turns out to be enough to send the rest of your body clashing with sharp rocks. The levels of adrenaline inside you prevent you from realising the damage you have received; an enormous wound that stretches from your back ribs to the under side of your breast, gashing enough blood to slowly drench your clothes crimson.

Levi much in a stressful haze as you, ignores the wound as well, his orbs glued to your petrified expression as your body gives in to a potential tragically painful death. Without wasting anymore time he forces your body up, none of you hearing the sounds of bones cracking and in seconds you find yourself sinking in a puddle of delicate white. This time Levi doesn't fail to notice the hot crimson liquid that contrasts with the snow.

You find yourself unable to speak. Your voice is cracked, stuck in the back of your throat as your sides and more importantly your leg, finally start pulsing with agonizing pain. Even if you try to fixate your hearing to Levi's words you fail miserably, battling hot tears that gather at the bottom of your eyes. Levi helps you on his mare, wrapping you securely with your winter cloak to keep you warm and you sigh in return to his comforting actions.

You only force yourself to speak to inform him of your location in the mountains.

There should be a small barrack like resort of hot springs and saunas around that nobles have abandoned in the last few years and if you took the right path you could reach one of them in time, before the sun set.

That was your initial plan nonetheless, from the moment you got separated with your team. Search parties could definitely find you there faster as well, they would be aware of the locations and by thinking of a right way to pinpoint your location you would save them from a lot of extra trouble. Nobody really wanted to spend so much time in the cold snow searching in vain. You knew that one so far.

"T-theres a hot springs resort, not very far-" you speak, voice trembling with each exhale, making Levi drop his shoulders just a tad in blissful relief.

"Tch, don't push yourself"

"I was searching for one, it shouldn't be far, judging by that cliff we have to head a few miles southwest."

Levi simply nods in response and urges you to hold tight onto him as he sets off. You reach your hand to apply pressure to your wound, you know there's a chance that if you don't even try you're going to die by immense bleeding and Mike will not hesitate to haunt you in the afterlife for not dying like a proper soldier.

Words barely slip your mouth whenever Levi asks for directions or of your condition, the pain you're feeling is excruciating to say at least and you begin to wonder if you're ever going to manage to one of those springs. Levi will have another burden on him, a full dead body to take care of and even though somewhere deep inside you a little ring of panic lingers and you hate yourself for thinking like that you try to stay calm and collected.

As if the God of Walls has been invading your very thoughts you quickly stumble into a breathtaking scenery. A small, snowy paradise lays before your eyes; a wooden cabin with a roof so white that it resembles a bride's vail and a teeny puddle of water that emits sheer smoke. The oasis is well hidden from the tiny trainee headquarters, but you can still make them out, maybe a flare once the storm is over will help you get found out sooner.

"Levi is that really a hot spring, or am I hallucinating?" You check with him, merely to confirm that you're still not in a close to death state.

"I'd be damned if it isn't"

___

"I'm not getting naked in the freezing cold" You bark at him with a tone so high pitched he feels that his eardrums will burst.

"Unbelievable! You're not even calling the shots, your leg is shattered and your side is torn open." Levi's voice is harsh and stern and swelling from the boiling anger in his chest for that he can't bring himself to understand how you even manage to deny the essential medical care you have to receive.

"No!"

"You have wounds to attend to, and I can't do it if you are soaked in dried blood, that being said you'll be infected and full of maggots tomorrow if we don't take action."

Your lips have formed a distinguishable pout in your face, he knows that expression as the one you get when you're being stubborn, difficult even so he takes it upon him not to buck down. No one else is going to die on his watch, especially if it not even by titans.

"Well" you nervously avert your gaze "Maybe I don't want you to see me naked!"

"Do you ever think about what you're saying or do you blurb shit out of your mouth like it's explosive diarrhea?" Levi snairls at you. "This is no time to be a prude."

You're suddenly at loss of words. Prude? He really had just called you prude out of all things, then and there and even he was probably just a little right, you really couldn't bear the thought of you being so suggestive around him. And he seriously doesn't see that, when he is supposed to be an expert at reading people.

Perhaps believing that he looked at you under any other light apart from being your superior was a misjudgment of yours.

Nevertheless when you decide to take off your clothes your efforts fall in vain. The pain in your leg won't even let you have control of the limb and you can barely even shuffle around due to your side. Levi takes a notice, he has to since his eyes are fixated on you and you watch as he comes closer. His hands are most delicate to the touch, helping you wordlessly with the binds of your chest that have stuck to your wound. You let out eventual flinches, huffs of misery from the extravagant pain, making Levi sigh in turn. When his arms wrap around your form your hands go to cover anything you can salvage from his eyes even if he seems to not pay any form special attention to your bare chest.

The situation is rather hard to grasp. One, because you haven't had such soft, warm bath in years and two because Levi, out of all people is in the very same hot spring as you. The water is soothing, flowing peacefully around your body as Levi works his handkerchief around your wound with one hand. The other, he uses to keep you steady in the water making up for the fact that you can't stand on your own feet.

It's a prominent position, if you had to admit. Your forehead rests on the top of his head while your chests barely graze and you have to remind yourself that he's only doing this to take care of you, because he's Levi and he's extraordinary compassionate with his comrades and not because he has any affectionate intention towards you. As unfair as it sounds to you, even if it makes your head and heart grieve the loss of a lover that's not even yours, you can't help but want to look into his eyes. You only manage to do so when he slightly pulls away to grap the bar of soap that rests close to his hand.

You bite your trembling lip in hopes of halting it. He looks like a God under the moonlight, bathed in hot water. Soft unevenly full lips are tinted with sheer purple and his skin is so much more paler than possible that you can see blue and purple blood vessels underneath his eyes. His short ebony locks are sticking to his forehead while droplets travel from their ends to the expansion of his face only to finally gather underneath his chin. Why did he have to look like that, and why did your heart flutter every time his steel eyes blinked into yours.

"Can I kiss you?" It falls out of your mouth mechanically, serving as a bold reminder that your words have once again taken over you.

Levi doesn't exactly react, not just yet, he only examines you with his eyes. Up and down you watch them run until they stop at your lips, your chin, anywhere in that area of your face.

His thumb flickers on his lips but never dares to jump the few centimeters that stand in the way to yours. He's undoubtedly awestruck by your inquiry and you can see it, but your vision is quickly blurred by an unfamiliar piercing feeling. Of course that's rejection. Why would he ever say yes. And most importantly what were you thinking?

"That morphine shot is messing with your head, which means it's probably time to patch you up."

But he doesn't make a single move to ruin the moment. You take notes as his hand leaves his own lips and dives into the water, standing just inches away from your waist. The ungrant permission to touch you in such suggestive way prevents him, even if you're the one who's waiting for a reply to drop from his lips.

He contemplates on the dynamics, is it you that tops him or are you downgrading your position to the title of his chair, he hopes it's the first, it makes him feel free, as if he's not needed to lead for once, deep down all he wants to do is follow.

That boiling spitfire inside of you insists of getting a solid answer, even if you try to push it in the darkest crevice if your mind. It wins, almost without any fight, mostly because you want to hear to believe it.

I don't want you to kiss me. That's all he has to say.

"If you don't do it, now, I'll shit my pants from the anticipation." What?

Without a second thought you shift your head forward, closing the gap between you. His lips are strong, cold and they taste like green olive soap, the one he's always using, but they don't feel foreign on yours. If anything the two pairs lock perfectly as if they're a match made by heavens, meant to find each other in this dark December night under a million snowflakes.

It doesn't last for long, a fact that engrosses you out and it's not lust filled either. It's soft and extremely fragile and you're taking the lead while you slowly move your lips up and down. Levi doesn't know your stomach is about to burst and that you're sure it will slip from the wound on your side if it continues swelling up with all this pride. In turn you don't know that his heart is clenching his chest in agony.

You're extremely against pulling away but you do, to inspect his expression for a brief second. The adorning curling of his lips is in perfect balance with his soft brows. Before you know it his hands are at the small of your back and underneath your clothed bum searching for ways to support you without hurting you. The only hand you can move goes to graze the coarse shaved hair at the nape of his neck.

The second kiss you share is much more passionate and greedy. It takes all you've got to limit your breathing through your nose; you want this to last. Your longing to taste him for as long as you can doesn't allow your lips to slips away from his.

His hands still grip on you so respectfully, as if you're going to regret this and push him away. But it never happens, you just continue to scratch at the back of his head, urging him to get impossibly closer. Even though panic ensues through his whole being, making his hands shake and his cheeks glow red, he manages to pull through this loving task with ease.

He doesn't want to pressure you just yet, so his thoughts never reach the tip of his tongue, but is this for real? Or was it his wild imagination?

With a pinch on his nose he pulls away, sparing a last glance at your swollen lips. "We should... Get out. I'll patch you and then-" As you interrupt him he doesn't miss the way your eyes avert from his.

"Of course sir. I'm sorry I got so carried away."

Levi snorts. So that's how it is then.

[jaehyun-eclipsed]

Try Again - Jung Jaehyun

Warnings: Very brief mentions of suggestive content

[1:45 PM] “Your cake and cupcake order will be ready for pickup on Saturday at ten!”

“Thank you!” I say with a smile.

The door to the bakery opens, pushing in an air current that makes the curls of my hair dance on my back. I open up my wallet to put my credit card away, pausing as I recognize the voices of those who have just walked in.

“I think my mom will like the red velvet ones. So maybe I’ll get a couple of those and then some of the tiramisu ones for us.”

A slightly deeper and silkier voice responds, “Yeah, I liked the tiramisu one last time.”  

Throwing my purse over my shoulder, I slowly turn around and freeze when the two boys come into view. They’re still engrossed in conversation with each other, their heads turned inwards, unaware of who could be standing in front of them.

“Okay, that sounds –” Johnny stops dead in his tracks when he turns his head forward, having to do a double take when he realizes it’s me.

The boy next to him frowns when he sees Johnny stop in place with his eyes wide with surprise. Curious, he turns his head to follow Johnny’s line of sight, only to inaudibly gasp, a look of shock spreading over his face. My gaze is focused on him, seeing anger… sadness… pain… all flash through his eyes within a matter of seconds.

The door opens again and an excited blond boy walks in, completely oblivious to the scene he’s just walked in on.

“Yo! Johnny! Jaehyun! I –”

I lock eyes with Mark as his jaw drops.

Mark closes his mouth and swallows nervously. “Oh,” he remarks. “Hi, Y/N.”

“Hi,” I say breathlessly.

I glance between the three pairs of eyes on me. My breathing is shallow and my chest feels heavy. I can hear my heart racing, my fight-or-flight response kicking into gear. If the floor hadn’t been cold, hard tile, I’d probably have fainted by now.

It’s been three months since I last saw Johnny, Mark, and Jaehyun. Two and a half months since I last spoke to Jaehyun…

The four of us became friends when our families were all vacationing at the same villa two summers ago. We all ran in the same wealth circle, having met each other at one time or another at various business functions for a few minutes, but never having the right opportunity to establish any friendships. But after that vacation, the four of us would all take trips together every summer and winter break, usually choosing some beach resort with a pool. It was all good fun – hanging out with the boys. They were always inclusive and considerate. Though, with there being four of us, we sort of naturally paired off with whoever we were most comfortable. (This was really only when we needed to do something in pairs, like couple’s massages or getting midnight snacks when the other two weren’t hungry.) Johnny and Mark had actually been classmates in school and therefore, naturally had more to talk about with each other. So Jaehyun and I formed the other pair. It worked well for us… until the last time we were together.

When I look back, I think there was always an attraction between Jaehyun and me. Once, Johnny and Mark wanted to go surfing. I had twisted my ankle earlier after I tripped on the beach and Jaehyun stayed back with me to keep me company. He took care of me; he always made sure I got back to my room safely when we were all returning from a late night.

Last November, the four of us had decided to go on a spontaneous trip – a luxury resort in an area with a temperate climate. It was warm enough to wear minimal layers during the day, but cold enough at night to merit sitting around a bonfire while shoving marshmallows into each other’s mouths.

The resort we stayed at was spread out over several hundred acres of land. Their living accommodations were comprised of individual suites that resembled condos without the kitchen. The suites were separated into different sections and unfortunately, Johnny and Mark had been placed in the “Olive Vineyard” section while Jaehyun and I were in the “Maple Garland” section. So every night, Jaehyun and I would take the shuttle up to Maple Garland and he would walk me back to my room before returning to his.

Except the last night.

The last night, the four of us decided to take an evening swim. And like usual, we took the shuttle back and Jaehyun walked me to my door. But something was off because he was lingering… and after throwing several lustful gazes and glancing down at my lips one too many times, I threw my arms around the nape of his neck and started kissing him.

But I knew it wouldn’t stop at kissing when he pushed me into my room and kicked the door closed behind him.

“So… do we need to tell Johnny and Mark?” he asked finally, as we laid on our backs, staring up into the darkness.

I was scared. I liked Jaehyun, but we had never discussed having an attraction to each other. It’s not that I didn’t want anything with Jaehyun, but I didn’t think he wanted anything, given that Mark and Johnny were always teasing him about some other girl. Jaehyun and I were friends. We were both single and sex deprived. I was just the easy fling on that dumb vacation that could help get him off.  

So to protect my heart, I said, “Why? We’re just having fun, right?”

The next day, I think Mark and Johnny knew something was up because everything was incredibly awkward. Jaehyun was avoiding me, barely acknowledging me when I asked him a question. Johnny tried to ask me if something was wrong, but I dismissed it all to poor sleep the night before. However, from the way they’re all looking at me now, I’m guessing Jaehyun told them.

Once Jaehyun’s initial shock has worn off enough for him to react, he lets out an exasperated sigh and turns around, quickly walking out the door. I inhale sharply, my feet acting before my brain, taking large strides as I run after him.

“Jaehyun!”

He continues walking away from the bakery, refusing to stop.

“Jaehyun! Can we talk? Please?”

I quickly catch up to him and he finally stops when I lightly grab his arm. He glances over his shoulder briefly before turning away again. “Talk about what?”

“About us…”

When he turns around to face me, I’m instantly filled with regret. His face is etched with pain and confusion. And suddenly, with a look of incredulity, he raises his voice and says, “What about us? There is no us! We haven’t spoken in months!”

I bite my lip, surprised at his sudden outburst. “I – I tried to talk to you… I still wanted you in my life –”

“You wanted me in your –” he mumbles sarcastically, followed by a scoff and a roll of his eyes. “You’re the one who said you didn’t want anything!”

“What? I – I thought you just wanted to have fun that night! Mark and Johnny were always teasing you about some other girl and –”

“What are you talking about? You thought there was another girl?” he interjects, his tone exasperated. He sighs heavily. “You think I slept with you that night just because I was bored? How could you ever think that?!”

“Well why else would you do it?”

He scoffs again. “Why?” he repeats in a mocking tone. “Isn’t it obvious?”

My forehead creases and my mouth is agape. There’s no way…

“I’m in love with you!” he shouts. “I’ve been in love with you!”

I blink at him. “Wh – what?”

He lets out an irritated sigh. “Why else do you – how could you not think – why else do you think I was so mad?! I thought I made it pretty clear that I liked you and you kissed me first so was I wrong to think that you –”

He stops suddenly, turning away and closing his eyes in attempt to calm himself. I remain silent, gnawing on my lip as an overwhelming feeling of stupidity slaps me in the face. How could I be this oblivious?

“I thought that you –” he shakes his head in frustration “– it doesn’t even matter. It’s over. It’s fi–”  

And just like that last night, I selfishly put my hand on the back of his neck and press my lips against his. He’s surprised at first, unable to react to the sudden contact.

But soon enough, he kisses me back, gently caressing my cheek as if all of the anger has dissipated… and any of the ice he used to keep his heart from feeling anything else has willingly melted away.  

“I’m so, so sorry,” I say when I pull back. “I was scared and I am so, so sorry for hurting you.”

His gaze lingers on my lips as he slowly nods, silently accepting my apology.

“Can…” I hesitate. “Can we try again?”

He continues to nod and a small smile forms on his lips.

“Yes,” he says simply. “Yes.”

Alternative Flashback Ending: Last Night Masterlist

[normalg-irl]

When People Ask Me What I’m Doing After Graduation This Is What I’ll Say | May 3, 2019

So, I don’t have a job lined up for after graduation. I’m also not volunteering with the JVC or Americorps like some of my friends who enjoy helping people. I don’t have an internship, and I’m not traveling anywhere. I actually have no idea what I want to do? Like as a career, but also … in life? So I’ve decided to construct an honest answer to provide to anyone who asks me what I’m doing after graduation. If you, too, do not have a “plan” for post-grad, you are welcome to join me in the glorious city of Hartford, Connecticut, where these 5 post-grad steps will be carried out.

Step 1: Watch Game of Thrones.

Never having seen Game of Thrones makes me feel almost as shitty as never having seen any of the Harry Potter movies (never mind never having read the books). This is the first time I’m admitting that. I usually just play along like,

“I would be in Gryffindor, no doubt. My favorite spell is Leviosa. JK Rowling is honestly a legend.”

I’m embarrassed to confess how uncultured I am. But, with GoT, it’s way too complicated. You can’t just skim the surface like,

“Winter is coming. Jon Snow is my favorite character. Yeah, I’m not bothered by the incest either.”

I’m going to take the first three weeks immediately after graduation to binge GoT and get caught up to speed for the sake of the culture. And also for my own mental health because I’ve been feeling excluded and anxious every time Khaleesi is brought up around me. She sounds like a legend, almost more so than JK Rowling.

Step 2: Exercise lightly.

After the three weeks of binging Game of Thrones I’ll probably try and get my body looking right. No one tells you that going to Punta Cana for spring break turns you into a drinking-machine-party-fiend. The all-inclusive trip destroys all tendencies of eating vegetables and run-walking on the treadmill. For the latter portion of senior year all I’ve known, and all I’ve wanted to know, are Miami Vices (pina coladas and strawberry daiquiris mixed for the ignorant lames), permanent sunburns and foggy conversations with the same people over and over again.

So, with that, health and fitness has plummeted drastically on the list of priorities. Before entering the “real world” I’ll need to burn off all the fried chicken I swallowed whole while floating around in the Punta Cana resort pool. Step 2 is necessary in order to bury that part of the identity and embrace a classier manifestation of self.

Step 3: My high school friends and I become so bored that we go get frozen yogurt and have a really awkward encounter with someone random from our past.

Step 3 can be weaseled in at any point in the post-grad plan. Preferably I will complete step 3 multiple times, almost on a weekly basis. I envision a lot of days playing out like this:

11:00AM: Wake up.

11:04AM: Enter an “Instagram k hole” (This is a term I just learned. It’s when you get so deep into Instagram it feels kind of like you did too much Ketamine, and you’re seriously f*cked up).

12:10PM: Mom is getting home, so I quickly stage a job application workshop in the kitchen.

12:30PM: Mom really wants me to try harder at applying for jobs, I tell her I will.

12:45PM - 4:20PM: *Insert step 1 or step 2 here, depending on what level you’ve reached of the plan.* So this block of time can be filled with either culture binging, or getting the body right.

4:20PM: By this time culture = binged, or body = right. Both great outcomes. Send a text in the group chat, everyone’s down to hang, obv. No one has a job.

7:30PM: Not sure how those three hours were spent. Potentially was sucked into another k hole, but this time mind was completely erased.

8:25PM: Group unites at the friend’s house who has the most chill parents.

8:30PM - 9:50PM: Vaping, light gossip, and brief but intense Instagram k holes are accompanied by a random TV show playing in the background like Catfish or anything on TLC.

10:00PM: One friend suggests getting frozen yogurt. It’s the best idea she’s had in years.

10:15PM: Arrive at Sweet Frog dizzy off the vape. The smell inside is extremely nauseating. Someone might pass out in Sweet Frog.

10:16PM: Everyone fills up their cups with a mixture of flavors. One friend just gets a ton of those little balls with juice inside of them. She’s a psychopath.

10:19PM: I enter a frozen yogurt k hole. Halfway through the fro-yo I realize I do not like fro-yo. But then all of a sudden my cup is empty.

10:23PM: The awkward encounter the entire group has been anticipating finally happens. The middle school basketball coach enters Sweet Frog with his new girlfriend. He has no idea how old we are. He can’t even make a guess. He is intoxicated in Sweet Frog. He kisses us on the cheeks. His girlfriend is really pretty.

10:41PM: I leave Sweet Frog feeling awkward and sick. But it was something I had to do. And it’s something you have to do. It’s only right.

Step 4:  Shock my parents’ friends when I say, “I have no idea what I want to do” in the Big Y parking lot.

After the Sweet Frog interactions, awkward encounters will be nothing but a thang. I expect them to spice up the depressing post-grad days, and will probably become a favored activity.

So when my Mom asks me to go to Big Y to get a watermelon (she likes to give me random tasks), I’ll be kind of excited to go.

When I see Mrs. Miller in the parking lot, I won’t pretend not to see her. She asks me what I’m up to, what my “plan” is, and when I tell her about binging GoT and going to Sweet Frog and working out every few days, her face grows concerned and I am hoping she talks about my excellent plan with the other moms. I just want to be talked about, honestly.

I help Mrs. Miller put her groceries in her minivan so she thinks I’m still a good person even if I have no ambition.

“Good luck, sweetie.”

She nods empathetically from her minivan window as I stand alone in my pajamas in the Big Y parking lot carrying a watermelon.

Step 5: Read a life-changing book at the town pool.

I haven’t read a book in years. Reflecting on my life, I may never have actually finished a full novel. What if I’m in a job interview and the interviewer asks me what my favorite book is? I need to have something truthful and profound to say. The Fault in Our Stars isn’t going to cut it. I could maybe swing saying that the Game of Thrones series is my favorite, because I’m pretty sure they were books before a TV show? But that feels like it’d be super transparent at this point.

I can’t go into an intellectual discussion with some alternative, experimental book all confident like, “Have you read The Girl with the Chastity Belt’s Lullaby? It’s my favorite.”

No, you need something absolutely classic like To Kill a Mockingbird or Don Quixote or Fifty Shades of Grey. I’ll probably pick up War and Peace and call it a day. Been meaning to read that one. And then off to the pool I go.

I see myself spending a super relaxing time by the pool with my book. There are no annoying kids splashing around the day I decide to go and conquer my book. It’ll be closed off for academics on their sabbaticals just like me who want to peacefully read and feed their brains.

As I flip around War and Peace, I see a ton of pages, and a ton of words I don’t know. I suck at reading. I don’t know how to read. I can read the words, but the whole time my mind is thinking about potential boyfriends and potential parties and potential conversations. All which might never happen.

War and Peace spirals me into an anxiety k hole, which I think is actually just an anxiety attack, and I storm out of the pool without even buying french fries from the snack bar.

That’s as far as I’m going to make it into step 5.  

And there we have it my friends. Graduating without a job isn’t that scary if you embrace my perfect five-step post-graduation plan. Because, believe me, once you do it all - once you’ve watched eight seasons of Game of Thrones, hit Sweet Frog a couple hundred times, toned a few muscles, run into lots of moms, and “read” War and Peace … you will be ready to hightail it back to NYC - and maybe even land a job.

------------

Published by The Rival at Fordham University on May 3, 2019

[marveltrumpshate]

“Higher, faster, further, baby.”

As we said in our closing message at the end of this year’s auction, that was our mantra coming into MTH 2019, and we certainly carried it off with your help.

Last year, we had 236 creators and 354 auctions… This year, we zipped past that with a tremendous turnout that went beyond our expectations: 324 "Marvel"-ous creators came forward to offer 522 auctions.

Last year, we raised $19,262.52, a mindblowing number we’re still trying to wrap our heads around… This year, we’re excited to announce that together, we raised:

That’s about $8,000 more than the MTH 2018 total 😮💖🎉

We’re going to channel Luke Cage here and exclaim, “SWEET CHRISTMAS!”

Considering just how successful MTH was in its inaugural year, we were unsure whether we could get close to those numbers again, let alone top them. Suffice to say, we were blown away at every single step, from creator registration all the way to donation processing.

We told ourselves we would be happy with any amount, especially if we miraculously matched our total last year, so we were shocked speechless when we hit it days before the auction ended. Then the total kept growing, with no sign of stopping or slowing down, as the donations kept pouring in. Surely it would stop at 20k? 22k?! A few of us, emboldened by the “higher, faster, further” theme this year, dared to wish for the impossible: 25k. We all knocked on wood and referred to this figure in vague terms (“the number we won’t mention,” “the number that must not be named,” etc.).

It was a remarkable experience, and we often found ourselves at a loss for words (we had to resort to heart emojis, keyboard bashing, and exclamation points many a time in our mod chat). We’ve been impatient to share the results with you, not just because of how incredible the final count is but because of how we got there. Each and every one of you was instrumental to our success, and we appreciate your contributions so very much.

Creators, we couldn't have started this auction without you all. We loved seeing so many of last year’s creators sign up again and were pleasantly surprised by how many new faces showed up to the party.

Bidders, as crazy as it sounds, most of the donations were small ones. It just goes to show how much of an impact you can have when you’re part of something bigger than yourself. Each donation has a ripple effect, and with enough ripples, that can cause a wave. You matter, and you can make a difference.

We also owe our success to our wonderful signal boosters. There can’t be an auction without any participants, and thanks to everyone spreading our posts around and encouraging their fandom friends to sign up and/or bid, we reached hundreds of incredible creators and bidders.

Thank you all. We’re so touched by the massive number of people who donated above and beyond their pledged amount, creators who took on multiple auctions and offered up multiple winner slots, and bidders who accepted their second-place wins with such eagerness! We also had people make donations in the spirit of MTH even though they didn’t win an auction, which was beyond generous.

We’ve already seen how our donations are changing the world for the better. To name a few examples:

Your donations to Rainbow Railroad had the double their impact as donations to the organization will be matched from November 1 until December 31.

Flippable helped turn the deep red Virginia into blue this election for the first time in 26 years, an extremely important victory for the Democrats that will have tremendous influence on how things may go in the U.S.A.

The National Women's Law Center won its lawsuit against the Trump administration regarding personal beliefs dictating patient care.

Not to mention that our good deeds haven’t gone unnoticed thanks to bidders who gave us a shoutout this year. The president of RAINN knows about MTH and gave one of our winners a personal thank you for participating and helping raise money for their organization, and BBRF somehow found out about us and emailed us personally as well.

We’re sure that in the months and years to come, we’ll see even more wonderful results.

In addition to the astounding amount of money we were able to raise for charity, MTH was successful in other ways. We strove to be as inclusive as possible, determined to make this event a fandom-wide effort. Considering that the auctions covered over 400 platonic and romantic relationships (if we include "all ships/gen"-inclusive relationships, this number is even higher) across 29 universes within the Marvel multiverse, up from 242 and 19, respectively), we can safely say that we accomplished our goal.

This spirit of inclusion also applies to our charities. Every one of our 30 supported charities received donations. We’re in awe of your commitment to supporting all our creators and charities and thrilled that you spread all the love around, bidders!

Here’s our breakdown of the donations (click to enlarge the image):

We’ve also listed the amount raised per charity on our List of Organizations page.

From the bottom of our hearts, we thank you for helping us turn our second Marvel Trumps Hate auction into such an incredible experience. We cherish every single message of love and support that we received and continue to receive on our Discord server and through DMs, Tumblr messages, emails, tweets, etc. THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH!

If you'd like to keep up-to-date with all of the 2019 Marvel Trumps Hate fills, follow us and/or check out the "mth 2019" tag on our Tumblr. You’ll also be able to find works posted on AO3 in our Marvel Trumps Hate 2019 collection and links to fills in our Discord server, which you can join to brainstorm prompts, chat about fills, and find out about other fandom events.

Thank you once again to everyone who volunteered their services, time, money, and platforms to spread the word.

We can’t wait to see all of your fanworks over the coming year!

Lots of love and gratitude, Your 2019 MTH mods

[cxptain-carol]

𝐢. 𝐪𝐮𝐢𝐝𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐜𝐡 𝐛𝐨𝐲 | 𝐟.𝐰.

◊ part one - part two - part three

◊ summary: madam pomfrey’s helper, y/n, doesn’t care for the ever-popular sport that is quidditch. but throw in an injured fred weasley, a week together in the hospital wing, and a sprinkle of innocent flirting and she might just have to change her mind.

◊ pairing: fifth year!fred weasley x fem!reader

◊ word count: 2.3k

◊ warnings: most of the story’s set in the hospital wing (no blood is mentioned), not really a warning but reader is implied to have a female best friend

◊ genre: good ol’ fluff

◊ racially inclusive reader

◊ reader’s house not specified, but makes the most sense in hufflepuff or ravenclaw 

◊ this part includes saturday & sunday

◊ a/n: this is my first time writing something this long but thanks to my being at home for the time being, i got it done. i split it into three parts so it wouldn’t be so overwhelming but i hope you like it! things are crazy in the world right now so here’s some fluff for the soul. stay safe and healthy and do your part to stop spreading germs. (aka, don’t go outside. read fanfics instead.)

“Could you bring these over there? Thank you, dear.” Madam Pomfrey handed you a stack of clean bandages, which you gladly accepted, and motioned towards the cabinet a few beds over. As you crossed the room, you paused for a moment, standing up on the tips of your toes and peering outside at the Quidditch pitch below.

It was a clear blue day, birds soaring past the window and through the sky but you paid them no attention. Above the neatly cut grass, you could make out the green and red blobs that whizzed around the field. Quickly losing interest in the match, you continued on your way to the cabinet and placed the bandages in an unmarked box before adjusting your apron.

While you never cared much for those weekend Quidditch matches, you wouldn’t mind getting some fresh air. Thankfully, the hospital wing had been empty since a fourth year boy was discharged this morning which gave Madam Pomfrey a chance to reorganize. That happened to be one of your favorite things to help with, so you eagerly joined her.

Your friends never failed to poke fun at you for enjoying something as “dreadful” as cleaning, but you didn’t take it seriously: they were always incredibly grateful when they returned to the dormitory to see all of their belongings orderly and in place. The one thing they couldn’t seem to wrap their heads around was your apparent aversion to Quidditch.

Almost consistently, you refused to accompany them and instead hid out in the library with an essay or helped in the hospital wing. Not even them swearing that the game you dubbed “repetitive” was in fact, just their excuse for checking out the players, was enough. You simply stated that you could see them just fine at breakfast and couldn’t be bothered to watch from the crowded stands and under the unforgiving sun.

You had moved on to rearranging bottles in the metal cabinet at the back of the room, stopping only to fix smudged labels and wipe off the shelf.

It was your second year volunteering in the hospital wing with Madam Pomfrey. At a young age, you noticed that you had a knack for taking care of the people around you and ever since, you hoped to become a Healer at St. Mungo’s. To gain a little experience in the field, you asked to work in the wing and were happily permitted.

There was only one problem, however: you, overloaded with work at almost any given time, couldn’t exactly afford to spend hours tending to patients. That’s why weekends were your favorite.

After a good twenty minutes of smoothing out bed covers and deep-cleaning bedside tables, you heard the loud thundering of a group of students in the hall. Squinting out the doors, you groaned at the quickly approaching mass of crimson-clad Quidditch players.

The team surrounded a hovering stretcher which Madam Pomfrey promptly magicked away after the student was laid down on one of the vacant beds. Too short to see over the team, who had moved to crowd around whoever was laying there, you sighed and resorted to busying yourself with plumping pillows. Almost a second later, your eyes landed on the mess of dirt that the Gryffindors were leaving on the freshly clean floor and you were suddenly very ticked off. The nerve of Quidditch players.

“Oh, relax,” Madam Pomfrey motioned for them to back off—reluctantly, they listened. That was when you noticed that you only saw one Weasley twin standing with the team.

“Can one of you actually tell me what happened?”

The crowd shifted and you could finally see an agitated Fred Weasley who didn’t seem to be in much pain at all.

“It was that git, Lucian Bole. I couldn’t help-”

“They had an altercation and Bole landed on his foot.” Alicia Spinnet cut him off.

After asking a few questions and trying in vain to get the Gryffindors to leave, Madam Pomfrey sighed and turned to you. Following her gaze, the team turned around and looked at you as well.

“Sprained ankle, Y/N dear,” she said with a sigh. “I trust you can take care of it.”

With a wide smile stretched across your face, you nodded. “Of course!”

She turned to the team, looking significantly less pleased.

“Out, out!” She finally snapped. “And you’re tracking dirt all over the floor!”

Once the team had filed out, you listened to Madam Pomfrey’s suggestions and went to the cabinets to grab supplies. Fred sat there silently, so still it almost looked like he was asleep. As gently as possible, you set down your things and tapped him on the shoulder. He opened one eye, looking around before landing on you. You held up the bandage and pointed at his foot.

“May I?” He nodded, looking a little less tense than before.

You gingerly began wrapping his ankle without a word. Talking to patients wasn’t really your forte.

“How come I got the assistant today?” Fred suddenly joked. “How do I know you know what you’re doing?”

He wore a smile now and you could feel the warmth returning to the room. You chuckled, propping his leg up.

“Madam Pomfrey’s been cleaning since dawn-” You were cut off as the doors burst open.

In rushed Professor McGonagall and clutched in her hand was the arm of a nervous-looking Hufflepuff boy who was soaking wet and covered in grass.

Not even bothering to listen in on the story, you waved your wand and the bundle of ice that you had carried over in a bucket was wrapped in a neat little pack that you handed to Fred. With a satisfied smile, you stepped back.

“I don’t see you around much, Y/N. There’s only… what, three classes I can think of that we have together.”

Realizing that he was pursuing a conversation, you sat down beside him and spun around in your swivel chair.

“Yeah, I don’t see Gryffindor too much, but you and your brother on the other hand—well, I don’t think anyone can go a day without running into you two.”

Closing his eyes again, Fred laughed lightly. You cocked your head to one side and eyed him curiously. Only seconds passed before he opened his eyes a sliver and squinted.

“What’s it like working in the hospital wing?” He stared up at the ceiling as he asked you this.

“Exhausting.”

“Why do you do it?”

You sat up a little straighter.

“I’m planning on becoming a Healer.”

Fred nodded.

“Makes sense.”

“But sometimes it’s nice. After class, I just get to come in here and help out. It… it makes me feel better somehow,” you continued. You could tell he was still listening despite the tired look in his eyes.

“That’s nice. It must suck to miss Quidditch though, right?”

You snickered.

“What?” Fred was smiling again, somehow amused by your surprising reaction.

You grinned too, nervously playing with your hands and avoiding his gaze. It was one thing to diss the sport behind closed doors but another to tell it to one of the players.

“Well, I’m not a big Quidditch fan,” you began. “It’s never really interested me.”

Fred looked taken aback.

“How? It’s the best sport there is! Kinda the only sport there is.” You laughed behind your hand.

“I don’t know, my friends are always telling me to watch a match or two, but I don’t see the point. Not to mention, I can’t stand when you guys come rushing in here, making a mess and fussing over the most minor injuries. I thought Gryffindor was bad at first but all the teams do it!”

Fred shook his head. “But don’t you think it’s good to see that? Nothing boosts a genuine camaraderie like one of your own breaking a bone. Or two.”

Once more, you were laughing. You couldn’t explain, Fred was just doing it to you.

Soon enough, you were sent to the Great Hall to bring some lunch for Fred which you did cheerfully, easily sliding into an hour-long conversation over the fresh sandwiches. George stopped by late into the afternoon and that was when you slowly began tidying up the room before clocking out.

Fred, who was now asleep, shivered and turned over, the setting sun in the sky painting him with fiery orange. His already red head seemed to be ablaze.

As you swung your bag over your shoulder and bid Madam Pomfrey farewell, you found your eyes landing on Fred again. There was just something about him that made you feel at ease and for some reason, you couldn’t be happier about getting to spend more time with him.

A small grin tugging on the corners of your lips, you turned away from him and strode out, closing the heavy wooden doors behind you as the sun began to sink below the horizon.

-

“Quick: pumpkin juice or butterbeer?”

Without missing a beat, you replied "Butterbeer."

Fred looked at you curiously.

“If I remember correctly, you were the one who practically bought out pumpkin pasties on the train in September.”

You choked on the water you had been drinking. Wiping the corner of your mouth, you nodded.

“That was me. But pumpkin pasties are different.”

Fred suddenly smiled and you fought the urge to tell him how cute it was.

“You’re really something else, Y/N Y/L/N.”

You were smiling too, but you shyly hid your face behind your hand. He quickly reached out and pushed it away.

“Stop hiding from me!”

Giggling, you adjusted the wrinkled sheet on Fred’s hospital bed. It was quiet in the hospital wing, as usual, but that was somewhat uncommon for Sundays specifically. Students always ended up filling the wing when they had free time to cause trouble but the only other patient was a third year Slytherin who had been playing around with his friends and got hit with a hex.

“Do you see much while you’re working here? It doesn’t seem as hectic as I imagined,” Fred remarked, looking around. You sighed in response, flicking your wand and handing him a fresh bundle of ice.

“The injuries are pretty similar: clumsy kids who messed around with spells, disastrous potion-making failures, and you Quidditch players- oh, but your brother Ron . . . he was here just last week to scrub out bedpans for detention. He sure does curse a lot. I had to use a silencing charm on him because Madam Pomfrey couldn’t stand hearing it.”

You examined Fred as he looked away, chuckling.

“You’re not like that,” you said quietly. “You’re a little more . . . pleasant.”

It became silent between you two. Your eyes shifted to the floor and you twiddled with your fingers, panicking about what you had said.

Interrupting your thoughts, you heard Fred reply in a whisper, “I take it you don’t give compliments often, do you, Y/N?”

You shook your head, raising your gaze to meet his. With one look at his warm brown eyes, you were smiling again. Suddenly remembering one of last week’s patients, your eyes widened and you bounced in your seat.

“You know who else was in here recently,” you said smugly. “Cedric Diggory.”

Fred groaned and turned away from you.

“Don’t worry,” you giggled. “I wasn’t going to fawn over him. You can turn around now.”

He did and you sighed.

“I guess the witches in your life can’t seem to shut up about him, judging by the way you just reacted to me saying his name.” He nodded.

“But y’know, Fred, I don’t really see the appeal.”

“Appeal of what?”

You shrugged as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“Quidditch players.”

Fred laughed, laying his head back against his propped-up pillows.

“Are you hinting at something, Y/N? Because if you are-”

You cut him off with a wave of your hand. Smiling to yourself, you tidied up the bedside table and picked up your wand to revive the wilting bouquet of flowers.

“Just simply letting you know,” you added with a smirk.

It felt as if time paused for a moment, you and Fred smiling at each other as the midday sun shone brightly through the large windows. You weren’t even supposed to be here, but here you were, chatting with Fred in the hospital wing instead of doing your Transfiguration homework. It had been hours since you clocked in and since then, you had been discussing every topic under the sun with him as a few students came by for quick visits to ask questions about their peculiar injuries.

Out-of-the-blue, two girls entered but your attention barely shifted away from Fred as you two continued your conversation at a lower volume.

“But personally, I think-”

“Y/N!”

You had been cut off by a slightly irritated-looking Madam Pomfrey who was waving you over. After some quick discussion about the new patients, you began tending to one girl’s headache before she came over again. You stepped away from the girl before Madam Pomfrey spoke.

“Y/N dear, I know it is not my business, but I can’t help but notice that you’ve become quite attached to Mr. Weasley and I’ve never seen you like that with a patient before. Now, I know you’re keeping it professional, but could you stay focused, please? I have a feeling you’ll be spending a lot of time with him this week but I may also need your help, okay dear?”

You felt your cheeks heat up as Madam Pomfrey finished confronting you at the foot of the girl’s bed.

“I promise. Also, I’m… I’m sorry if it seemed like I was being unprofessional today,” you replied nervously. Your fears diminished as a small smile found its way onto Madam Pomfrey’s face.

“Oh, don’t worry, dear. You two sounded very sweet with each other,” she said, knowingly.

You wanted to hide your face in your hands, but as Madam Pomfrey walked away, you locked eyes with Fred. The cute little smirk on his face practically spelled out that he had heard it all.

[lawandorderforevercsi]

Love Desires Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own CSI: Miami, Anthony Zuker, and CBS do.

Beta'd by: calleighstorres

It was a beautiful summer day. Natalia and Horatio were relaxing on one of the deck chairs by the poolside. Natalia sighed. At the moment, she and Horatio were at the most romantic all-inclusive Sandals resort in St. George, Grenada, for their honeymoon.

The last ten days explored the island, and what it had to offer: diving, visiting a rum distillery, a tour of the chocolate company, and of a spice plantation. They visited nearby Martinique and enjoyed fish Friday along with listening to steel pan music, which was much more different than what they heard back in Miami. They then visited Fort Matthew made the climb up magnificent views made arduous hike the more worthwhile. They also participated in water and land sports and had a blast doing so. As much as they explored the outside, they also stayed in and explored each other.

Now on their last day, and they were enjoying their last day snuggling and making out. A short time later, Natalia said, "I am going to go for a swim because it could be a while before swimming again."

With that, she got up but not before exchanging another kiss. After she got in the pool, Horatio rested on the deck chair he reminisced back to their wedding.

-Ten days earlier-

It was a sunny day in Santa Monica, their big day had arrived, and they couldn't be more ready. They choose to go small and intimate; it was easier since their jobs were demanding. For the location, Natalia and Horatio would have picked one of the sandy beaches in Miami. Still, because of the kidnappings and deaths, they decided to have it close to where Horatio proposed to her.

Once Calleigh, Maxine, Anya, and Christine made their way down the aisle as the maid of honor and bridesmaids, the Bridal Chorus began to play, and everyone stood up. There appeared his beautiful bride with her parents. She had on an off-the-shoulder ball gown wedding dress that hugged her curvy body like a hug, causing Horatio's heart rate to rise a little and swayed a little. Kyle (who was sharing co-best man duties with Eric) noticed his father's sway a little he leaned in whispered, "Dad, I don't think you would want to faint right as your bride arrives."

Horatio steadied himself and nodded as Natalia reached the altar. Once her father Jeffrey had kissed her, he placed Natalia's into Horatio's, they then joined both hands and became lost in their little world. It wasn't long before the officiant announced, "Now Horatio and Natalia have opted to say their vows. Go ahead, Natalia."

Taking his hands in hers and with mists in her eyes, she began. "Horatio, my handsome Ginger man. I never thought I would never find love again. Then you came and showed me what real love is all about. You loved and treated me like a queen, and with respect, and I will be forever grateful. Horatio, my promise to you is that I will try to be worthy of your love and trust. I promise that I will be honest as well as be kind, patient, and forgiving. But most of all, Horatio, I promise to be a true and loyal friend to you. I love you."

Horatio brought Natalia's hands up for a kiss and said, "Natalia, I was completely lost after losing someone close to my heart. You came in and have shown that it is possible to love again. I promise to love you in good times and in bad, and I cherish you and respect you. Natalia, I give these things I give to you today for the rest of our life."

Once the final blessing was performed, the officiant said, "Horatio and Natalia have vowed their life and love in front of you all today. Now vested in me in the state of California. I now pronounce husband and wife."

Turning to Horatio, the officiant said, "You may kiss the bride."

Horatio stepped closer and pulled her into a loving kiss. Natalia held him even closer and gave him an equally loving kiss.

The officiant announced, "It's with great honor that I now present to you, Mr. and Mrs. Horatio Caine!"

The entire wedding guests all stood up and cheered as they made their way down the recessional as husband and wife.

Horatio deep in thought but lost his train of thought when he saw her exiting the pool dripping wet and looking like a million bucks. He got up and met her halfway.  Before she had a chance to towel off, he threw her off a little only for him to sweep her up in a sizzling kiss. When they parted lips, she said in an erotic tone, "Hey handsome I'm about to head off the shower, would you like to join me and possibly work on our honeymoon baby?"

Horatio didn't need to be asked a second time. He jumped up and took her in his arms and said, "Let's go, my love."

They soon had a trail of clothing that led to their bathroom.

~10 months after the honeymoon, 2015~

The pregnancy had been smooth, and the delivery was fast. Natalia and she eve decided that she wanted to go without an epidural, which led Horatio to admire her even more. She pushed long and hard, and it wasn't long, and Baby Girl Caine had come into the world screaming loud and clear. Natalia held her for mother to newborn skin to skin contact for a little before letting daddy do the same and Natalia getting the sleep she needed.

They knew that Kyle would be coming soon, the Boa Vistas along with Christine and her family, and Anya would come by after lunch.

As Horatio held his daughter, he relished being able to hold a baby in his arms. He knew that babies grew up so fast, and he was cherishing this moment.

After Horatio had completed his part of the skin to skin contact, he held her in his arms as baby girl Caine slept. Horatio whispered, "My darling daughter, your mama, big brother Kyle and I have been waiting for you. We loved you when we found out you would be coming to us. You have many uncles and aunties who love you and will protect no matter what."

No sooner had Horatio finish talking to his daughter when he heard, "Dad?"

Horatio turned around and saw Kyle with balloons, flowers for Natalia, and a teddy bear for the baby. Putting a finger to his lips and nodded to the side Kyle knew what that meant. Setting down the gifts, he hugged his dad, Kyle asked, "How's Natalia?"

Horatio replied, "It was a long, and she is getting the sleep she deserved. As soon as he had said that when Natalia woke up, "Did I hear someone call my name?"

Kyle walked over and hugged his step-mother, "Hey mom, how are you feeling?"

Natalia was so happy when Kyle began calling her mom. She welcomed him with open arms and knew that he needed the mothering touch that he didn't get with Julia. Natalia said with a tired smile, "Sleepy and sore but otherwise happy."

Kyle saw the pink bundle and asked, "Is that, my little sister?"

Horatio answered, "It is, would you like to hold her?"

Kyle was nervous, but Natalia said reassuringly, "Don't worry, you will be great."

Horatio gently placed his daughter into her big brother's waiting arms, and Kyle asked, "What is her name?"

Horatio said, "Son, meet Erin Marika Caine."

Natalia added, "Right now, you are the first to know."

With a smile on his face, Kyle said, "I will remain quiet until everyone knows. He looked at his sleeping baby sister, "Hey Erin. It's your big brother here. You are lucky to have the best parents ever. As for me I will make sure you are protected, loved, and teach you all the things you need to know."

With that, Kyle saw a hint of a smile from his baby sister, and it warmed his heart even more. Half an hour later Kyle had left to work at the Police Department in Parkland. Just before visiting hours ended for the day, the dayshift team with tons of gifts in hand arrived at the hospital to visit with the new family. Eric gave his boss and former brother-in-law and said, "Hey H, Natalia, congrats you the birth of your daughter."

Calleigh and Alexx made a beeline for Natalia. When the ladies saw her head peeking out, "She is so beautiful!"

Ryan, who was close by with Walter, pointed out, "No, duh look at who her parents are."

Walter poked Ryan hard in the arm and said, "Save the dry wit for the job, man."

With Calleigh holding the newborn, Alexx said, "No matter what, we are going to spoil this little girl."

Eric asked, "So have you guys decided on a name for this little cutie?"

With a teary smile, Natalia said, "Ok, you know how Horatio and I were hesitant at one point before we go together?"

Everyone nods. Natalia continues, "Well, Horatio and I had a guardian angel who gave us the nudge we needed. Well, we saw this middle name. We thought it was perfect. Everyone, Horatio, and I would like you to meet Erin Marika Caine."

Everyone in the room gasped. Eric was especially moved. Eric shed tears of joy, and said, "I am happy you and H decided to honor Mari. I know that would she be honored and will be Erin's guardian angel."

Everyone nodded in agreement. Just then, the team all felt a breeze come into the room. But only Eric and Horatio smelled Marisol's favorite fragrance and knew she was with them in spirit. Indeed Marisol was present. She bent down, kissed her brother's and Horatio's cheek which was followed little Erin's forehead. Right then, the baby opened her eyes, instead of it being blue like Horatio's or mocha brown like Natalia’s, it was hazel; just like Marisol. They all knew then Mari was a part of Erin and of course, watch Erin grow up and help guide her.

Indeed it was their heart's desires that helped them get what they each's other's love.

A/N: Thanks for reading the third and final chapter of "Love Desires" As always, reviews are appreciated!

[route22ny]

It was particularly dangerous during the Jim Crow era. Black motorists frequently found themselves turned away at motels, coffee shops, even gas stations. Pass through an all-white town after dark, and they could be arrested – or lynched.

It was a perilous time, but one New Yorker made it easier.

His name was Victor Green, and for decades he wrote and self-published a guide called The Green Book. It first came out in 1936, and each year’s issue provided an updated, state-by-state list of businesses that faithfully served black customers. “Carry your Green Book with you,” its cover advised. “You may need it!”

Yes, that should sound like a warning to black drivers; it was that dangerous.

That African-Americans drove through the country at all was a tribute to determination. When the Green Book debuted during the Depression, the average price of a car was $760, six month’s wages for most blacks. Many banks wouldn’t give them loans; most insurers wouldn’t write policies.

Some dealerships refused to sell to African-Americans – even if they paid in cash. General Motors management worried that black customers would cheapen the Cadillac brand and scare off white buyers. The company relented when they realized how popular the car was with black celebrities.

Once black motorists managed to get a car, their troubles took new turns. Of the nation’s gas stations, only one chain, Esso, regularly welcomed African-Americans. Finding a hotel or cafe was even harder. Black families setting out for a drive learned to bring containers of gasoline in case they ran out, and they packed food because eating in restaurants was so chancy. Longer excursions? Best to pack some blankets in case you had to park somewhere and sleep in your car.

As much of a hassle as all of this planning was, it was minor compared to the actual trip. Racist cops, infuriated by the sight of black drivers, were ready to pounce. Some African-American men bought chauffeur’s caps so, if they were stopped, they could claim they were just servants running errands.

Yet if it were dangerous to be caught driving while black it was still preferable to the institutional nastiness of segregated public transportation.

“Did you ever see a Jim Crow waiting room,” W.E.B. Du Bois wrote in 1920. “You stand and stand and wait and wait until every white person at the ‘other window’ is waited on. The agent browbeats and contradicts you, harasses and confused the ignorant, gives many persons the wrong change, compels some to purchase their tickets on the train at a higher price, and sends you and me out on the platform burning with indignation and hatred.”

Decades later, it was no different. As the movie “Green Book” dramatized, it was no easier for rich and famous African-Americans.

In 1954, Ella Fitzgerald flew out of San Francisco for an Australian tour. The first leg of her trip was fine, but when she tried to change planes in Honolulu, Pan Am refused to allow her to board. She was stranded in Hawaii for two days before Fitzgerald could find another flight. When she sued, the case was dismissed.

That was why black families would scrimp and save to buy a car. Once you had wheels, you had some control over your life, particularly if you had a Green Book in the glove compartment, listing establishments that welcomed black customers.

Some, like Manhattan’s Brooks Brothers and The Pierre hotel, were white-run, integrated havens. Most, however, were small, independent black-owned businesses, eager to serve the community. Their inclusion provided a double benefit, not only steering readers toward safe stores and lodgings but supporting African-American entrepreneurship.

In researching her book, subtitled “The Green Book and the Roots of Black Travel in America,” Taylor drove across the country, visiting as many of Green’s original recommendations as possible. Some were still standing, like the Rossonian Hotel in Denver (photo below). So was Dooky Chase’s restaurant in New Orleans, where President Obama was chastised for trying to add hot sauce to the gumbo.

And as the author traveled, Taylor rediscovered a forgotten map of African-American aspiration, achievement, and entertainment.

There was the “black borscht belt” of vacation spots in northwestern Michigan, where the Idlewild resort spread over 3,000 acres, and featured rising stars like the Four Tops. Shearer Cottage in Oak Bluffs in Martha’s Vineyard began hosting prominent black guests in 1903.

There was even Murray’s Dude Ranch, in Victorville, California, a fully integrated vacation spot that catered to celebrities from white gossip columnist Hedda Hopper to African-American icon Lena Horne. Heavyweight champ Joe Louis trained there, and two all-black Westerns, “Harlem Rides the Range” and “The Bronze Buckaroo,” used the ranch for sets.

At first, the Green Book depended on establishments for its information, which could be unreliable. Harlem’s 101 Ranch, listed as a cabaret in the 1938 edition, was actually a sex club where jazzman "Pops" Foster remembered, you saw "women goin' with women, men goin' with men, people on the floor gettin' their thing." It was raided and shut down the following year.

But as his guide grew bigger, Green made sure it became more professional, too.

Articles detailed the tourist attractions of cities like San Francisco while advising readers they might find it easier obtaining accommodations in Oakland, across the bay. Advertisements pushed expensive African art and cruises to the Caribbean. Listings expanded to include coffee shops and colleges.

Green died in 1960. For a while, his widow and his staff continued publishing the guide. But as integration finally, slowly spread there seemed less and less need for his guide. In 1965, the year after the Civil Rights Act outlawed discrimination, the Green Book didn’t publish at all. The 1966-67 edition was its last.

In the end, it was a casualty of the future its readers had dreamed of.

Although racists could, and still do, deny service to African-Americans, by the late ’60s, blacks could legally demand equal treatment in any establishment they visited. And once they could, they did, walking into restaurants, night clubs, hotels, and resorts that had previously turned them away.

It was good news for everybody except the African-American businesses that had once catered to the community.

Although blacks now rushed to patronize white establishments, whites were not as eager to patronize black ones. Restaurants closed. Clubs shuttered. Once-famous hotels, like New Orleans’ Marsalis Mansion – run by Wynton’s grandfather – became flophouses. And a vital, vibrant part of American history was razed then forgotten.

The lie of separate but equal had been exposed. But, sadly, some of what made that subculture not just separate and inherently unequal, but unique, was gone.

“We got what we wanted,” observed African-American activist Georgia Ayers, as she watched another historic black hotel shut down in Miami. “But we lost what we had.”

***

https://www.nydailynews.com/entertainment/ny-overground-railroad-book-20200110-ungu7wqqzrh7dl3yo5q6cebeyu-story.html