#we dated back in 2013 but I was a pos then and cheated on him because I give in to peer pressure

[tiredsadpeach]

May not feel great rn but tomorrow I get to see my best friend and we’re exchanging gifts and then afterward I’m going with my sister to pick up a cat

[safestplacetohide-blog-blog1]

Our Unending Love Story

So ganito yun, Imma tell you a story. Sabi niya nung last time akong nanuod ng romantic movie: "Love story nanaman" tapos eto ngayon, sinusulat ko yung love story namin. So, Dadi, LOVE STORY NANAMAN! Haha! We met December year 2008. Umuwi ako ng probinsya because of my sick grandma. Siya doon nakatira, near my grandparents' house. I never knew about his existence years prior to that. Haha! Anyways, it all started with dota. Yep, that online game na kinaadikan ng bawat kalalakihan na kilala natin. I can't remember how our convo started but I can remember that he asked my cousin for my number and how my other cousin told me na gabing gabi na tumatawag pa siya sa I don't know kung bahay nila or kapitbahay nila para magpa load at matext ako. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, di pa po uso ang free data sa facebook noon. lol! Sakto naman na that night, sumama ako sa mga cousin ko para matulog sa bukid (I can't remember why we slept there tho), malakas yung signal. Sa bahay kasi ng grandparents ko, walang signal so there's no way na makakapag reply ako kung nasa bahay ako. Days went by, lagi na kaming magkasama pag gabi noon. Until we decided to make our relationship official. January 1, 2009. That was the first time na naging kami. We were happy. May pinag selosan pa ako noon na babae (Naaalala mo pa ba di? Haha) But time came na kailangan ko ng umalis. Nawalan kami ng communication. I think that was the reason why iniisip ko noon na di siya seryoso at loyal saakin. We broke up. Everytime na uuwi ako sa probinsyang yun, nagkakabalikan. Ni hindi ko na alam kung ilang beses ba kaming ganon. Siguro it's because we're too young? Or maybe we weren't each other's priority that time. Fast forward to year 2012. November 2012, of course, umuwi nanaman ako ng probinsya and guess what? Nagkabalikan nanaman kami. Pero this time he's serious and I wasn't. Nasanay ako na bigla nalang siyang nawawala so ang iniisip ko that time, ganun nanaman siguro ang ending nito. So I did something that I shouldn't do. I cheated. I never thought na that time seryoso na talaga siya. I only realized it recently because this dude dictated our conversation from that year to me. He's not deleting our convos you guys!! ❤ So yeah, back to the story. January, 2013 we broke up again. This time, nobody else is to blame. It's all on me. I seriously regret that I hurt him that time. And my insides are still crying because of what I've done 5 years ago. Maybe if I never cheated on him we are still together rn. I screwed up real hard. Fast forward again to year 2016. I am still in a relationship with the man I cheated on him. I started to have communication with him again. And guess what? By this time I'm pretty sure you guessed right. Yep, we had our secret relationship. How? Pinag sabay ko sila. Yes, I'm a capital a-hole. And this dude is plain stupid for taking me even if he knew all about my relationship. Nagmahal lang daw siya guys. Haha But still, I ended it with him. Why? Yes, I love him. Very much actualy. But I have assurance with the guy I'm currently dating that time. At sakaniya, wala. Iniisip ko noon iiwan niya din ako. Na baka di din kami magtagal. Madami nakaaligid sakaniyang babae. Oh yes, I forgot that detail. He's working in Manila na that time. Before I ended it with him, nagkita pa kami. We went on a date y'all! Something we haven't done before. Sa tabi tabi lang kami noon pero dahil parehas na kaming graduate ng college and currently working, may budget na kami for a proper date. We ate then watched a movie (Cinderella). After that we went to Quiapo Church then Divisoria. We ended our day with a dinner tapos hinatid niya na ako sa bus terminal. He was teary eyed while saying goodbye. I never ever wanted to see him cry again. Iyakin kasi yan eh. Ang babaw ng luha pag dating sakin. Di niya alam, iyakin din ako, di ko lang ipinakita. We parted after that nawalan nanaman kami ng communication. Okay, so before I continue let me just tell you how I feel. I love him. I always thought he was my greatest love. Kahit gaano pa kami katagal na hindi magkita, pakiramdam ko malulusaw pa din ako sa tingin niya whenever nagkikita kami kahit pasulyap lang. I still get nervous around him. There's a part of me na naiwan sakaniya. Tingin ko yung part na yun ng puso ko, kahit gaano pang kadaming tao ang dumaan sa buhay ko, hinding hindi nila makukuha yun. He took a part of my heart and kept it. His love is my weakness. His eyes, the way he looks at me is full of love. His smile is something I wanna see for the rest of my life. His kisses are enchanting. I am so damn in love with this guy. And I don't know what to do. June 2018. I've had a glimpse of him and that is enough to make my feelings get awaken again. But it was too late for us. I am already married. I can't remember if it was the same month when we bumped into each other and he said "Uy P, musta?" I answered him with "uy" pero di niya pala ako narinig. Di ko nga alam paano ko siya sasagutin noon because guys, I was shocked na pinansin niya ako. Turns out, di pala siya sure kung ako yun or yung cousin ko. Hahahaha! To be continued because I still don't know how to continue thia story. Di pa siya tapos guys. Abangan.....