#wdym I every lifetime I will find you???

[dearmyloveleys]

me when I heard rumours that the next mxtx pairing is immortalxmortal: WE GON GET FUCKED UP

[atzfilm]

my particular taste in fics is niche enough that i just have to write it myself man...

[kinardscake]

hi, sorry. i just wanted a place to rant and uh. this got away from me. feel free to ignore this! sending love to you and all my fellow bucktommies! <3

can i say this: "playing the field" is a bullshit argument. if you (general) had to experience Every Single Thing in life until you are "wise enough" to make choices and have commitments as a grown ass adult, none of these couples could be together. wdym athena didn't sleep with tons of women and trans people before choosing bobby? she cannot possibly know that she loves bobby, a person with a penis, because sHe HaSn'T pLaYeD tHe FiElD enough yet! because what if her "last" is actually not bobby? bobby could die tomorrow. it's not unlikely. athena doesn't know when he might die. bobby doesn't know when athena might die. they don't know if maybe some hurdle will break them someday. and still, we see them treat each other as "their lasts" and investing in their shared future. that is what humans do.

the fact of life is this: you have billions of human beings on this planet and thus plenty of options every day that you have to choose from. that also means that when you made that choice, your are aware that you forfeit the opportunity to get a different outcome. that goes for every single friendship, relationship, hookup, job offer, hobby, place to live, and so forth. realistically, none of us will ever have it all. that is not possible. buck is a firefighter and thus forfeits the opportunity to be a teacher or a zoologist. buck is living in his loft, thus forfeits the opportunity to buy a house. buck buys a couch, thus forfeits the opportunity to have a different one.

that is LIFE, baby.

if the 911 writers think that one must have lots of sex to know when one is in love, well! good news! buck did that already in season 1! buck went through multiple "updates" to learn what he wants. "love" is not suddenly a completely different and unknown concept to buck. he has loved before. he is loving people right now. he has lived through more things than any other person ever will in their lifetime. has experienced eye-opening trauma that clearly says that life is fucking short. and you tell me that after all this he just accepts that others tell him what he supposedly feels? nah fam. this is once again feeling like buck is just "going with the flow" because despite 7 seasons of development, he still seems to let others tell him what he thinks and feels and wants. i'm pretty sure he knows what he wants. buck told tommy that he thinks what he wants could be with tommy. he said it from the beginning. but then the show suddenly pulls a 180 and decided that, actually, buck is unwilling to put in any work.

bobby's first wife and mother of his children died, and nobody questions that his love for athena is real. eddie's wife and love of his life died, and everybody is still hoping he finds another great love after her. you can never know what happens in life, and none of that diminishes the fact that love is real and meaningful and worthy to fight for when you are feeling it! just like chimney went after maddie and pushed to support her despite maddie herself telling buck to not tell chim where she is (which buck respected and got punched for as a thanks). chim explicitly went against maddie's wishes because he knew this was a moment to fight for and support maddie.

just like the old tommy said: "you make it". and that's exactly it! buck has tons of options nd he could find "the one" in multiple people. until buck is dead, he will continue to have options. and it will be a continuous choice to stay in a committed relationship regardless of the other options that will always be there, no matter who he ends up with in the end. that is how life is. he could sleep with thousands of women and men and still be alone because sex with strangers is an investment into something "fun", yes, but not something that is a committed relationship. buck has learned that lesson in season 1. at some point in life, you either choose one person and put effort into that relationship, or you will never make any choice at all and thus never have any of "the ones" that you could have had.

buck can choose to invest his time in meaningless hookups. that is a valid choice to make. however, we know that buck was unhappy with that. why are they trying to reheat a 6-year-old moudly soup?

bucktommy is not even a "the one that got away" story for that reason. we know that both tommy and buck actually want commitment. they are literally on the same page. and instead of fucking committing, of intentionally choosing each other day after day after day, communicating about their insecurities and feelings and needs some more... they suddenly pull back completely? what the actual fuck is that logic? either you want to be in a committed in a relationship or not. make a choice. most people literally talk about that on the first date. making tommy pull back like that after 6 months is horrible, but making buck accept this without any pushback is frankly stupid. THAT would have been the moment to fucking fight for this relationship and point out that "yes, i could easily go fuck other people with different genitalia and guess what, i have been aware of that option existing this whole time but the point is that i INTENTIONALLY CHOOSE to be WITH YOU". but for some reason... nothing. poof. done.

and then i think back to red's story and how it affected buck tremendously... how red put his work first for decades and that he always regretted not investing more into his true love which he met when he was young... red did not choose the person he loved. he chose his job. he did not put in the effort to build a relationship, did not take any risk, and was thus had to live with the consequences of his own actions (living utterly alone after retiring because colleagues are not forever). and that is the thing: there will be what-ifs and consequences in all our lives. you can only be on one (1) path at a time. there will be chances missed. lives you maybe could have had. but this is not how real life works. so you either start making intentional choices and accepting the fact that all of life includes risk and potential heartbreak, or you will regret living as if you are paralyzed.

just. sorry. i didn't plan for my rant to be so long but i'm still so mad at this bullshit take that they gave to tommy of all people. i love tommy, he isn't at fault here. i love buck, he isn't at fault here. the writing in the last episode, however, is really making me fucking mad. it's so condescending and disrespectful to buck as a character but most importantly to bisexual/pansexual people. just because "there are more options" for bisexual people does not mean that the dilemma isn't the same for every human being. if you want love, you have to choose it. you have to work for it. you have to fight for it. you have to communicate what you want and need. you have to be a team with your partner to deal with hurdles together.

this has nothing to do with the size of the dating pool. it's about knowing what you want. all characters in a committed relationship, namely athena, bobby, chimney, maddie, hen, and karen, all have a big potential dating pool. they could all sleep around forever if they wanted. they could test every kink under the sun. however, they do not want to sleep around. it's as simple as that. and there is nothing wrong with you if you intentionally pass by certain opportunities. people know what they want. this is like men telling women that their life will never be "complete" if they don't have children of their own. like how fucking condescending is it to assume that you know what's best for another person when they are mature enough to form their own opinions?!

with how they have written buck for the past 7 seasons, it seemed like he wants commitment. this was established in the pilot episode. but if he just "accepts his fate" and sleep around now, no strings attached? well. okay. so what i am hearing is that either buck still does not know what he wants in life or that the past 7 seasons are a lie and actually his key to happiness is fucking strangers. either way, he has been stagnant for years in this endeavor.

buck and tommy could have easily fought for this to work. this was the perfect opportunity. but they didn't. and now i really think that they have truly lost the plot with buck's overarching storyline. very saddening.

You took the words right out of my mouth, Nonnie.

Sending you so much love as well, and, please, keep speaking your truth. 🫶

[askstevella]

Things my husband says 🐾

—Husband!Steve Rogers x Wife!OC

~ god help Stella 😅

Stella: Please tell me you didn’t drag Sam and Bucky into this.

Steve: I didn’t drag Sam and Bucky into this.

*the doorbell rings*

Stella: *cross her arms* Who’s at the door?

Steve: *smirks* I think you know.

———

Steve: What’s does IDK, WDYM and ILY mean?

Stella: I don’t know, what do you mean, I love you.

Steve: I love you too but you’re not gonna be any help, I’ll just ask Sam.

Stella: I-

———

Kendall: *tapping on the table*

Steve: *tapping back*

Stella: Stop that please.

——-

Steve: What would you do if I died today?

Stella: I’d die tomorrow.

Steve: Marry me.

Stella: Already did.

———

Stella: I hate you with every inch of my body right now.

Steve: That’s not a lot of inches.

Stella: I-

———

Sam: *at Stark party* Uhh I think we lost him.

Bucky: No we haven’t. Watch this.

Sam: Huh?

Bucky: *shouts* Your wife is useless piece of sh-!

Steve: *pops out of nowhere* SAY THAT AGAIN MOTHER—

———

Stella: So Steve got drunk last night.

Thor: Oh no.

Stella: And tried to set our marriage certificate on fire.

Steve: Good luck trying to return me without the receipt!

———

Steve: Did it hurt?

Stella: *rolls eyes* Let me guess, when I fell from heaven

Steve: No.

Stella: What?

Steve: *smiling* Did it hurt when you fell for me?

—————

Liane: Hey what are you getting Steve for his birthday?

Stella: I am married to Steve and gave him 2 kids, that’s enough presents to last him for a lifetime.

Steve: Hey, you married Captain America, you didn’t do so bad yourself.

————-

Stella and Bucky: *kidnapped by Hydra and HIVE*

Strucker: Soon the Captain and his team will arrive, then will see what true power tastes like

Bucky: Let us go asshole.

Strucker: Not a chance—

HIVE Agent: *hears guns blazing through the halls, grunts and screams of stuff being blown up* Uh sir, who was that?

Bucky: Your fucked.

Stella: *grins*

Steve: *bust the door open as he snarls* Say your last prayers, Strucker!

————

Stella: *looks at him while he’s drawing and mutters* I’d date you.

Steve: *smirks, definitely heard her* What?

Stella: *blinks and half scoffs* I said, I hate you.

Steve: *smiles to himself* I hate you more.

————

Bucky: *drunk on Asgardian liquor* Sam is the hottest person I ever met.

Steve: He is your fiancé.

Bucky: Bullshit. I can’t stand the guy.

Steve: So why did you just say find him hot then?

Bucky: Cause I got eyes, Steve.

————

Steve: *under his breath* I don’t wike it.

Natasha: *gasps*

Steve: Nat don’t—

—————

Stella: *at 3am reading* Wow, some few hours earlier some couple just tried to kill each other in their own home. Can you imagine someone ever snapping like that?

Steve: *trying to fall asleep glaring at her* I can.

—————

Steve: If I dislocated John Walker’s arm, would they arrest me despite being the original Captain America?

Stella: Yes. Yes they could.

———

Steve: I’m dying!

Stella: WHAT?

Steve: -of hunger!

Stella: Oh thank heavens.

~~~~~

~~~~~~~~~

We might need a Steve one soon 🤔 what do we think? Which couple is next? Liane & Ethan? Rose & Finn? Peter & Rei?

Please like, comment and share 🫶🏼

Tags: @missstrawbs2001 @purpleprincessonfyre @meiramel @gcthvile @rickb-chaos @gaminggirlsstuff @wizzzardofoz @cherrysft @thechoooooosenone @luna-d-marsh @rooster-84 @sherloquestea and etc

[jiminrings]

“The ache of unfulfillment in you is bred by everything significant in your life” really legitimized the harrowing feeling I have everyday questioning what I’m doing in life,

but also I don’t really do enough to change it? It is what it is(for the most part) and I’ve been living in my head constantly scrutinizing myself enough for three generations. It’s a sad truth I’ve come to live with, but I really resonate w readers lack of agency after all.

In a very selfish way, I was jealous of the eventual convo w joon airing out her grievances and seeing him will to make that change while addressing his faults. I wish I had siblings (or anyone) that saw me grow up and realize that maybe I did deserve better, better than just “okay”.

“What your mom does know is that she doesn’t know a single thing about the heartbreak you suppress, and that thought alone makes her hiccup in tears.” Can we put this in the hall of literary cogitates? Re: I had to open my journal in the middle of reading and reflect on why this scene came down on my chest like the meteor that killed the dinosaurs.

I loved yoongi (still rooting for him to grovel a bit more) but him finally revealing all the silent ways he loved reader was:(. She deserved to know how much she meant to him, that he loved her so much, traveled countries in hopes to find her.

I want to believe he truly loves(ed) her and she didn’t become his failsafe bc of the divorce with hyewon. I truly think “you don’t know what you had till it’s gone” describes Yoongi because he missed a lifetime a love for a couple years of settling with someone who didn’t respect him.

“You’ll go on this tangent that you’ve always been weak, influenced by the times that Yoongi had chastised you for your lack of a passion. 

To you, Yoongi had been right in a way.

To Yoongi, he’s always been in the wrong” broke my heart the right amount :|

Haneul being a conjecture personified. A constant reminder of what reader could’ve had, but more importantly a wake up call that we’re too late for hypotheticals. We’re here now and have to deal with the consequences of (Y)our actions (yoongi:p)

I also loved jk. He was so sweet and if their jobs weren’t a conflict of interest, I’d be delighted to see how loved he’d make her feel. I hope he puts his crush to good use and treats her the best.

I think this has been my favorite oc you’ve written because of how much she resembles my daily life. A kind of selfish bit, but it’s heartwarming looking at someone knowing they deserved better than the cards they were dealt because that means there’s a hope someone will finally look at me and think the same. (Fingers crossed for us all)

Thank u sm for writing this and I hope my eyes are not mistaken me and there’s a continuation of the series? I’d love to see how it plays out

Also, reader & I would love a Spotify jam session w Passion by PinkPantheress on repeat all night long for sure <3

first of all, thank u so so much for reading and being here w me 🫂🩷 i'm with you with that harrowing feeling every single day bc whenever i look back at even the most recent month, i get so shocked?? wdym i am occasionally miserable bc of the same things i swore are the ones that keep me happy . ahhhh i'm glad that stuck with you!!!! u may not have siblings but trust me, as someone with two brothers, having them isn't what's always cut out to be i promise!!! i resonate w you wanting someone to tell you u deserved better (for the best and more than okay) n although i'm not your sister, i'm here to tell u that you really, genuinely did 🩷🩷 STOPPPPP u opening ur journal mid-read?? whew!!! haneul really is a conjecture personified i fear </3 thank you so so much for reading and taking the time to send me this!!! it truly means a lot to me (more than i can ever enunciate) n to know that oc is a statue of what you n i (n a lot of other people) feel like is really something!!!! ty for the recs n yes there'll be a season 2!!! MWAH!!!!

[abigailpoe]

Home for Christmas (Parker x MC)

3rd Day of Christmas

Summary: It had been a few years since everything had finished with the cult and the lake has been finished. Parker and Erin broke up when she returned to college, and they hadn’t seen each other since. This year, however, Erin was returning to town for Christmas. That’s when they ran into each other…

Notes: I don’t own any of these characters.

Rating: PG

Tags:  @boneandfur @littlecrookedheart​ @syltti78​ @regina-and-happiness​ @flyawayboo​ @alegria1580​ @boneandfur​ @llamasgrl​ @tmarie82​ @indiacater​

“I’ll be there soon,” I promised my brother. I hadn’t been home to Pine Springs since everything that had happened with the lake and cult. I still talked to Tom and Danni every once in a while, but after I left for college, things were never the same with Parker and me.

“I miss you a ton. I know Parker misses you too, and he watches out for me just like he promised you...” Elliot trailed off.

“I have to go. The roads are icy, and I don’t want to get to get into an accident.” I replied in hopes he would drop the subject of Parker.

When I went away to college, I thought Parker and I would say in touch. We had only been dating a few months, but everything just felt right. However, distance caused major issues. We both decided it was for the best if the two of us went our separate ways. Elliot said Parker never stopped looking out for him. Danni and Tom both informed me that Parker wasn’t as happy as he once was and that he often took it out on others. 

I turned right and towards town. It was snowing heavily, and it made difficult to see too far in front of me. I had my brights on, but that didn’t seem to help with the visibility. That’s when I saw a deer run into the road with her fans. I slammed on the breaks, but the icy roads carried my car into the ditch. I attempted to open the door, but I was stuck. I pulled out my phone and began texting Elliot.

Me: Help? 

Elliot: What happened

Me: I didn’t want to hit some deer... so now I’m stuck in a ditch in my car

Elliot: Parker is on his way

Me: Wdym

Me: Elliot!

I tried a few more times to get ahold of Elliot, but nothing was working. I heard a scraping noise on the outside of the car. I began pushing against my door. My door suddenly flew open, and I was thrown from my car.

“Are you okay?” Parker asked, helping me up from the depths of the cold snow. 

I brushed off my clothes and looked up at him. He looked different now, which I was expecting, but I wasn’t expecting him to have some scruff. Along with that, he looked physically exhausted.

“Hi...” I mumbled.

He looked down at the ground. “Hi...”

“Hey, I-”we both spoke at the same time. “You can go first.”

I took a breath. “I wanted to talk to you, but I didn’t know it would be like this.”

Parker smiled. “You did?”

I began walking over to his car. “Don’t make a thing out of it, Shaw.”

“Come on. Parker is amazing... Don’t let him slip out of your hand.” Danni stated. “He really does care about you.”

I sighed through the phone. “I just don’t get it. One minute he’s strong and confident, and then the next, he’s all flustered. Parker just mixes in anger.”

“Are you sure you both want to do long distance?” asked Tom, who was with Danni in her car. 

“Don’t ask dumb questions, Tom!” Danni snapped, and I heard a slap in the background. “Listen, Erin, it’s not our call to make, but we know how much you both care about each other. Please, don’t lose him. It’s been almost a year, and with school getting out soon, you’ll be coming back to Pine Springs.”

I sighed. “Actually, I won’t. I got a huge chance at an internship in Cordonia to work for the new duchess. I agreed to take it.”

I slammed the door to Parker’s jeep shut. It was the same that it had always been. He kept it cleaner than I ever had in my own car. I looked at the dashboard to see a picture of our old group still tapped up. Parker said he kept it up there to remind him to be careful because he had people to come home to.

Parker opened the door to his car and climbed in. “I missed you.”

I looked down at the floorboard, messing with my fingers. “I missed you, too.” In all honesty, I did miss him. I missed all of him. His smile. That fucking smile that anyone could fall in love with. I missed our late night calls. The inside jokes. Our friendship. I missed all of it but the tears.

He turned the keys and started the car. We began to roll forward and onto the road. “You said you wanted to talk.” He whispered. 

I nodded, still not making eye contact. I knew that the moment I did, I’d give into Parker. “I did. I’m sorry that shit hit the fan and ended the way it did.”

He took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. “I understand why you took the internship. I was upset at the time, but it didn’t give me the right to react the way I did.” I looked out the window at the snow. I watched as the flakes hit the car and melted away. 

Every Friday, Parker and I would have an unofficial date over FaceTime. I was excited to share the news with him. “I have good news!” I smiled.

“You’re coming back to Pine Springs?” He asked.

My heart sank and the smile faded. “Actually, I got an offer to work as a press secretary for the new dutchess of Cordonia. It’s going to take all summer.”

“You’re joking, right?” Parker asked. “I thought that you were coming back...”

I looked down at my now empty plate. “I’m so sorry... I wanted to, but this is a huge thing for me!”

“Whatever. You’re going to the opposite side of the globe!” He yelled. “We’re never going to get to talk because I’ll have to work when you’re free or vice versa. Did you even think about us?”

I nodded, trying to defuse the situation. “Of course I did! I took this for you, for us. It’s an experience of a lifetime, and I can use that to help us one day.”

He rolled his eyes. “Maybe you’ll meet a noble and date instead. Just have at them. Maybe it would’ve been better had we not met.” He slammed the laptop shut without another word. My heart broke at those words, but there was nothing I could do.

I slammed the door to the Jeep shut. I looked around to discover that it was the same way it always has been. It was clean on the inside, and I knew Parker hated trash in his car. I inspected the dashboard to find the pictures still tapped up. One of the whole group and one of him and I. He tapped them up there because it said it helped him drive better, and that it gave him people to come home to.

Parker climbed in the car and started it. We both reached for the seat warmer at the same time. “Sorry.” We said.

I pulled my hand away. “Thank you for getting me out of that car.”

He pulled out onto the road, ice crunching beneath the tires. “It’s no big deal.”

I stared at the floorboard while playing with my fingers. I was nervous seeing him again. All the butterflies in my stomach from the first time we met were returning. “It is to me...” I croaked.

He dove about a mile before either of us began to speak again. “You said you wanted to talk.”

“Yeah...” I whispered. “I’ve missed you...”

He glanced over at me. “Really?”

I nodded. “Yeah, I did.” I took a deep breath and realized it slowly. “I missed us...”

Parker stopped at the stoplight, putting on his turn signal. “I do, too, but it’s just better like this.” He pulled onto the road that leads to my grandpa’s house. “You have a year of college left, and then, you have to get a job. I know you wanted to go to LA or New York City.”

“I actually finished college a semester earlier than expected. Everything has been finalized, and I’m actually back in town to find a job...” I tailed off. I saw a smiled dance on his lips. “I need to look out for Elliot.”

He pulled into my old driveway. Once he put the car in park, he turned to face me. “So you’re head to stay?”

I nodded. “Yeah, for now. I don’t know if I’ll stay or not.”

He sighed ever so lightly. “I hope you stay.” We both sat there for a bit, the light music from the radio piercing through the silence. Parker cleared his throat and began speaking. “There’s a Christmas party at Robbie’s house tonight. He started hosting them as a thank you to the town for forgiving him for what his father did.”

“Do you want me there...” I whispered.

He nodded. “It’d be nice if you were, but I understand if you don’t want to come.”

“I’ll see if I can go. I’m sure Elliot will want to since he and Robbie are dating.” I explained. “Thanks for a save.”

“Do you care if I come inside and check in on Elliot? I do it once a day, and I know you’re here, but I still want to check up on him.” Parker explained.

I pulled the door to his jeep open. “After you.” We went up to the door, and without knocking, we went in.

“You’re here!” Elliot yelled, running at me and jumping into my arms, tackling me onto the floor. “I missed you!”

“I missed you, too, but get off of me!” I laughed. He stood up and Parker helped me up.

Elliot raised an eyebrow, giving me the ‘look’ without Parker catching our glances at each other. “Are you going to the party tonight?” Elliot asked.

I shrugged. “Do you want me there?” He nodded. “Okay, then I’ll go. Can you help me choose something?” I grabbed Elliot’s hand and dragged him up to our old room. I shut the door rapidly behind us. 

“What the heck is wrong with you?” Elliot asked, rubbing his wrist. “Are you nervous with Parker around?”

I picked up a pillow and threw it at him. “Shut up! It’s not like that!” I began frantically digging through my closet.

I felt Elliot roll his eyes from behind me. “Then why are you throwing clothes all over the place?”

“Maybe I want to look nice,” I responded, pulling out a deep burgundy dress. I began to put it on while Elliot changed into a suit. I tried to get the zipper, but I couldn’t reach it. I turned to ask Elliot for help, but he wasn’t there. I walked softly down the stairs in my heels to find him.

“What are you doing?” Parker asked from behind me, scaring me and making me gall down the rest of the stairs. I prepared myself to hit the floor, but Parker caught me.

He helped me up and I brushed my clothes off. “Thank you. Um, anyways, I needed help getting my dress zipped up the rest of the way.” I muttered. Parker motioned for me to turn around. I did, and his fingers gently skimmed my skin. I could hear his breath quicken as well as his heartbeat.

He checked me out and smirked. “You look amazing, Erin.” He smiled. I noticed that he changed into that damn suit that did things to me.

“Hate to break up the love fest, but we have to get going if we want to get there on time. I left grandpa a note for us, Erin.” Elliot explained. The three of us rushed out of the house and to Robbie’s house.

The house still looked almost the same. Robbie gave the place a needed paint job, but the place was also decked out in Christmas decorations, which made my subconscious not remember the brutal things that happened here.

About an hour into the party, I find Parker, alone in a doorway. I slid up next to him. “Hey, are you all good?”

He glanced around and nodded slowly. “It’s weird being back here.”

I half smiled. “I know what you mean.” A slow song came on as I inspected Parker’s face for any hint that he wasn’t okay. I tapped him on the shoulder. “Would you like to dance?”

“Oh! Okay!” He blushed. I let him onto the dance floor and wrapped my arms behind his back. “I remember the last time we were here.”

“I mean, we did almost die.” I joked, trying to lighten her mood. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, this is where I knew that I liked you.” Parker smiled as wee swayed.

“Where were we last time we were here?” I asked. He raised an eyebrow I leaned in towards his lips, brushing mine against his.

“I think right about here.” He whispered. “I’ve... thought about this.”

“Really?” I asked, him nodding he’s in response. “Funny, you said that last time we were here.” I pulled him in as he did the same to me. All the feelings of longing for Parker in our time apart sent pulses down my spine. He pulled me closer, kissing growing more and more feverish by the second. We both pulled back and smiled.

Funny how history has a way of repeating itself...