#was trying to determine when this video was recorded because it had my hopes up for a stache at testing

[rickybaby]

Daniel with a message for Hands on Learning

[bones4thecats]

Hi again! I've got an interesting idea for you today!

How would Record of Ragnarok Gods react having to fight/marry a widowmaker(overwatch) reader!

Widowmaker is a really interesting and tragic character in my opinion! She was a ballet dancer, before she was kidnapped and subjected her to an intense program of neural reconditioning, in effect creating a sleeper agent

Shortly after returning home, she killed her husband and vanished.

Widowmaker is the perfect assassin: a patient, ruthlessly efficient killer who shows neither emotion nor remorse. Widow's physiology was altered to improve her aim, drastically slowing her heart, which turned her skin cold and blue, and numbed her ability to experience human emotion. It dulled the pain of what she’d done, while heightening the charge she felt on the hunt.

How the gods react knowing she killed her first husband? How would they react to her title as the perfect assassin? How would they react knowing she can't feel emotion yet yearns to be loved and to be healed?

A/N: I have never played Overwatch, since I’m not that big on video games, so thanks for the description regarding her character! I also decided to do all Hindu Gods because they’re my favorite pantheon. Now, I hope this makes sense, enjoy~~

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🪩 Shiva met you through his wives, as they needed someone taken out, but they couldn’t just stroll up to random human and go, ‘Yeah, ur dead.’

🪩 After that hunt was successful, he had gotten more and more interested in you personally

🪩 It took a while, but you eventually took him as your husband and your blank stare was something he was determined to fix

🪩 He had no idea why your skin was blue, but he figured you were a possible demi-god, or like Kali, you just had blue skin like how he had purple

🪩 When you decided to tell him about everything, his reactions varied;

🪩 For the husband thing; He was kinda freaked out, but he knew you had changed and wouldn’t try hurting him

🪩 Title as the ‘Perfect Assassin’; Like mentioned, he already knew from his wives, so he just relaxed about that

🪩 And the way you yearn to feel things; Shiva was quite the romantic, so knowing you couldn’t show it, yet you wanted it so badly made his heart yearn for you more

🪩 Parvati, Durga, and Kali have been trying to get you to feel things again to the fullest, and they swore on it, with Shiva, they’d succeed

🪩 Oh yeah, and he loves dancing with you! It calms him down after a long day

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🔥 He had heard about you, but never met you until Shiva brought you into help scout a rogue God from another Pantheon that was said to try murdering any God that came near them

🔥 Agni looked at you as you nodded and he helped you take the God down, using his fire to burn the guy to crisp

🔥 You and him were a funny match

🔥 He was very warm while you were very cold, so resting with him was one of the best experiences you ever had

🔥 Unlike Shiva, he reactions a lot differently to each incident

🔥 Husband murder; Kinda scared of you, but he accepted it in the end, as it was the only way you guys could continue a healthy relationship

🔥 Title; It’s normal for important people to have big titles, like Shiva’s was the God of Destruction and Dance, which made people turn to look at him. So having you get a nickname that stood out didn’t shock him, in fact, it impressed him more than anything

🔥 Your yearning for closeness; Definitely has the same issue as you, he gets judged by the fire that envelops his body, and because of the flames, he doesn’t get that much physical affection, so he tried hugging you daily no matter what

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🐘 He met you when he was picking flowers for his mothers and father

🐘 Ganesha was spacing out so badly that he didn’t notice a rogue God coming from behind to kill him, so when he heard the sound of a man burning alive, he jumped and saw you come down to finish the job

🐘 You scared him at first, but after getting to know each other, you guys were inseparable

🐘 The women and Shiva allow your relationship to thrive as long as you didn’t go berserk like you did with your last husband, which prompted you to tell him about your past;

🐘 Husband Murder; He won’t judge you for it, but seeing as your past gives you justification in his eyes, and he’ll defend your honor of that from anyone

🐘 Title; Shocked? Yes. He knew you were a good shot, but not that good! Not like he was doubting your ability, but it just made him go;

“ Holy Heaven, my wife is the best assassin in all Pantheons! “

🐘 Finally, the yearning for love; Definitely gives you what you want, he loves affection and nobody can change my mind.

🐘 He does enjoy watching you dance, sometimes joining in himself whenever you ask him too

[beebopurr]

here's another! Even longer! Hope you like it, from @ilk-insolence

---

“–so she just would not give up on those fucking oysters! And after I let her get the last of the lobsters too!”

“Mmm,” Leo hummed behind her.

April placed the box of old paraphernalia on the kitchen counter and began cutting it open.

“And you know what she said to me? She said, ‘only fools would relinquish shellfish to their opponent!’”

“Mmm,” Leo repeated. She heard him haul more boxes in the living room. “And yet, by the end of it, you gave up the oysters.”

“Only ‘cause her kid was cute,” April responded, “but that was weird too! Who brings their kid to a fish market in the middle of the day? Poor thing was going to get crushed!”

Leo laughed. It changed a lot from the chittering April first heard all those weeks ago.

“What?”

“It’s just, funny. You, of all people calling someone weird.”

April shoved down an old self-conscious shadow she never quite managed to outrun and focused on sorting the dusty tea set from the box. “What do you mean?”

“You literally clobber any poacher wielding guns that sneak onto the island with nothing but a bat. You laugh at actual ghosts. You try to catch fish with your bare hands. You’re the weirdest human I’ve ever met April.”

When April was younger, a comment like that came with a sense of failure. Whenever other kids avoided her at school or playgrounds it was because she was too passionate, too rambunctious, too much. Too weird. Admittedly some of those kids were wack, haughty with hindsight; but Leo wasn’t one of them. He was unabashed, self-assured, so if he said April was weird then it was simply true.

Yet, she didn’t find herself minding this time.

Maybe something about a giant mutant turtle who’s ostracized by society being the one to call her weird had something to do with it; made it into a compliment. April felt an easy warmth fill her.

She and Leo continued sorting through the old boxes with possessions the prior lighthouse keepers left behind. April was determined to use some of that stuff for decor or functionality and save herself the money. It wasn’t like the past keepers were coming back for it anyway.

“Oooh, what’s that?” Leo asked.

“Hm?” April peeled away from her box on the couch to peer into the wooden case Leo put on the carpet. “That’s a record player. You put a black disc thingy inside it to make it spin, and then you put the needle on it to play music. Man, I haven’t seen one of those things in ages.”

April looked to Leo. He was staring at the device with a fragile expression. Slowly, he lifted a hesitant hand towards it, then pulled back. Leo still hadn’t told April who taught him English.

Without taking his eyes off the record player, Leo asked, “Can we try it? Play something on it, I mean.”

April winced, “Sorry no, I didn’t find any records here”––Leo’s face fell––”but! But, we can play music from my phone!”

She quickly whipped it out from her jacket, “You want anything specific?”

Leo leaned over her shoulder like he usually did whenever the device was around. “Could it do any song?”

“Uh, nearly any, I think. You got something in mind?”

“Yeah. M–I used to listen to it pretty often. I uh, don’t know the name of it though.”

“Well, you could look up the lyrics.” April passed him her phone.

Leo paused for a moment, a pursed look on his face, then he slowly typed onto the screen. A youtube video popped up as the first hit. He looked to April, confused. She gestured, “Play it.”

The song took a second to load. Then a drawl:

Put your loving hand out, baby

Like a flower, a bright delighted smile grew on Leo’s face. He looked at April, sheer amazement. She was too, she didn’t think she would recognize the song.

Cause I’m beggin’

When the beat hit, April bobbed her head to it, Leo echoing a second after. His delighted smile didn’t take long to turn playful. He stood up, the bobbing shifting down to his whole body. April followed. Together, they extended their hand out to one another.

So put your loving hand out baby

It was stupid; their uncoordinated jigging around the boxes splayed across the living room. April laughed as Leo kept dramatically outstretching his hand whenever the penultimate lyric popped up. After the first chorus helped knock her memory into place, April began belting the parts she knew. They weren’t quite dancing together, swaying a movement that didn’t match the other, but they were having fun together so they were dancing together.

When April looked up, gasping for breath and laughter, Leo was smiling at her like she was the unicorn from the movie they watched together. She felt her chest flutter, a warmth ballooning from within that pushed out everything else.

So put your loving hand out darlin’

When it was over, the autoplay simply moved onto the next song. The boxes around them laid forgotten for some time.

---

Leo’s feet crunched on the gravel that made the entrance of his home. He never really realized how nice the sound was, crisp, firm. He chirped into the cave to announce his arrival. The walls swallowed the echoes with their lovely texture. Outside their cove, the ocean rumbled her endless beautiful song. Leo chirped again, just to hear it in the air.

A following panicked chirp responded. Leo! Leo! It was Donnie. Raph’s hurt!

His blood froze. Leo ran into the cave and nearly slammed into Donnie. What happened?!

Donnie simply ran deeper into the cave. When it widened into their largest cavity, Leo saw Raph lying under the blankets next to their campfire. He could hear him breath heavily. Leo rushed forward, instinctively chirping comfortingly. Raph rumbled back.

Leo pushed back the blankets to see his wounded leg, blood already seeping heavily against the makeshift bandages. It was on his left thigh, the red signaling to Leo that the wound was two-way; something pierced clean through the flesh.

Hunters.

No, no, no, no, not again.

Leo touched Raph’s forehead. Fever. Shit.

I’m okay. I’m okay. Raph rumbled, though the pain lacing his every breath made it extremely ignorable.

Leo trilled, Mikey?

Still outside. Donnie then turned and left for the exit. Leo went to their supplies for more bandages. When he sat back down Raph was still rumbling. I’ll be okay. I’ll be okay.

When did this happen?

Somewhere around the coastal town. They were new.

Shit.

Raph’s hand came up to his shoulder with the old scar. Went through this before. Raph’ll be fine.

It was terrifying the last time too. Leo rewrapped Raph’s leg, making sure to pressure it hard. He also put wet cloths on his forehead. The fever scared him. For a second, Leo thought about bringing up April. She could help, she probably even had better medicine.

But the others didn’t trust her. Raph didn’t trust her. Wounded like this, he’d be even more reluctant to open up.

Donnie came back with Mikey before complete sundown. Together, they hunkered in for the night.

Deadass you should put this on ao3 or sm I'll share the link

[faulty-writes]

Hello, I'm asking as an anon cuz its my first time requesting and I'm kind of nervous but I was wondering how would bakugou,deku,todoroki(+iida if you want<3) react to they're significant other doing the bumpy ride trend? where they balance a thing on their head and dance? Example : https://www.youtube.com/shorts/eWBDUeWgMXI and then they get very flustered lol love u<33

[ Oh God, is that what the kids are up to these days? Welp, best of luck to them! I know my limit for headcanons is usually three, but we all know how much I love Iida so he had to be included in this. So I hope you enjoy this rare, four-character headcanon set. P.S. Love you too, anon. ]

"What the hell are you doing!?" Katsuki couldn't care less about the 'trends' extras were trying. The only type of social media he liked was about heroes. Still, he was curiously angry when he walked into your room to see you balancing something on your head while moving around. The fact that you were having trouble keeping that thing on your head made him roll his eyes.

He thought you had enough common sense to know when to quit following this stupid trend. However, you didn't and he wasn't shy about sharing his opinion. "Why are you wasting your time doing this, dumbass? Trends are only for extras with nothing else to do!" You tried not to let him bother you, after all, you were just having fun.

He usually didn't care about anyone's safety but his own. But damn it, you were different. When you tried to balance dangerous or heavy things on your head while dancing, he'd scold you. "Idiot! Be careful, damn it!" He'd snatch whatever item away from you and quickly replace it with another before flushing as he admitted, "I just...d-don't want you to get hurt, dumbass."

Most believed Katsuki could not laugh or find humor in anything that wasn't someone else's misery. But after some time of seeing you perform this trend continuously. He couldn't help but smile. Yeah, it was a rare sight to see him smile, hell even see him happy. But damn if he didn't admire your determination and that cute look on your face whenever the particular item you were balancing on your head fell off mid-dance.

Izuku would more than likely respond to seeing you perform the bumpy ride trend with curiosity, after his initial surprise. His curiosity would lead him to research everything about this particular trend. He would even watch videos of others performing it, trying to figure out what the most effective strategy is to master it.

Naturally, due to his desire to save and protect others, he'd make sure you always performed the trend in a safe environment. In addition, he'd make sure you used safe items to balance on your head. Usually, he'd help you gather empty bottles or provide one of his All Might plushies for you to use.

You'd usually assign him to record your attempts on your phone so you could upload them later. While he was uncertain about this, he did it because he wanted to help you and show his support. Of course, he was particular about how he would record you. He'd always make sure he was standing at the correct distance, that it was the correct angle, and that the lighting was good. No surprise, you ended up getting a bit impatient with him.

"H-hey it's okay…maybe w-we can look over my notes to s-see what you're doing wrong, y-you'll get it eventually!" He'd always have some encouraging words for you whenever you failed at your bumpy ride trend attempts which was appreciated considering you usually took your frustrations out on him.

"Um…are you alright?" Shoto's initial response to seeing you perform the bumpy ride trend is confusion. He doesn't bother with social media or understand its trends. This leads you to have to explain it to him which only confuses him more.

Before jumping to any conclusion about whether this trend was safe or unsafe, Shoto would observe you performing it. This would help him determine if he should intervene or not. He knew he didn't have a right to tell you what you could and couldn't do. But as your significant other, it was his job to protect you no matter what. He'd do that even if you hated him for it.

His concern eventually led him to suggest alternative trends you could do together. He knows that you'll probably argue with him, but he also knows that it's important to do things that strengthen your bond in romantic relationships and frankly, if he could convince you to do alternative trends with him, he could keep you safe.

He would congratulate you when you finally managed to dance and balance something on top of your head without it falling. But he's unsure exactly what to say which leads him to flush as he struggles to find the words. "That's nice…I am…happy that you accomplished what you wanted to." He still wouldn't understand it, but he'd try to be proud of you in his own way.

"I strictly advise against this form of social entertainment!" It was no surprise that Tenya found social media trends to be a waste of time. The fact that said trends didn't have any academic or structural value added to his distaste for them.

Even after conducting thorough research regarding the "bumpy ride" trend, he still doesn't approve of it, but he knows his disapproval won't sway you from attempting it. So, he overanalyzes it and creates a structured plan to help you perfect and achieve your desired outcome.

Despite not wanting to share his or your "personal" life on the internet, he agrees to document your attempts at this trend. "Are you most certain you wish to perform this again?" The videos he records are typically unedited, which gains your account numerous followers who like to point out his strange way of talking and the fact he's constantly chopping his hands in front of the camera in your videos.

After some time, he finds out that your classmates know about the bumpy ride trend and your videos which he helped upload to your social media account. Even though he feels embarrassed, he explains the pros and cons of the trend. He also explains why he supports you and how he will continue to do so until you master your techniques to accomplish your desired outcome.

[lightlycareless]

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTLu3Bq6F/

I saw this and it made me think of Naoya trying to record something cute for Y/N while she’s out but this happens instead. I wonder which kid this would be since I don’t see Naomi doing this (It feels Naohime coded lol)

Hello!!!

What is up with these videos; seriously, is it just me or are they not appearing anymore? ANYWAYS the tiktok went on something like this: a dad lays down next to their child, trying to record them playing or so, the kid is not having it and smacks them on the face with their toy. hahahaha Poor guy.

But definitely Naohime coded. Naomi is such a sweetheart (when she doesn’t require attention, of course. Because if not… well, we all know what happens.) if anything she loves video calls with her parents, recording videos and such ☺️

warnings: none. just fluff. your youngest daughter is kind of a brat tho hahaha. also idk if it's necessary but naoya is like a happy and loving man/husband/father so YEAH I've redeemed him in my blog :)) just in case there's new readers around.

Happy reading!

But Naohime… oof, Naohime doesn’t like it when she’s interrupted, or doing anything that she doesn’t feel like. If she’s playing that’s the only thing she wants to do; if she’s watching cartoons, don’t even look at her, she doesn’t exist until the episode is over!

This was a well-known fact by everyone around, and yet… Naoya hoped that maybe this one time she wouldn’t react that way. Maybe she’ll go along with recording a small video for you when away, or even join a video call, just like his other children happily did so.

And yet… he’d be proved wrong the moment Naoya decides to lay down next to his youngest who was diligently playing with one of her newest toys, discreetly adding her into frame when video calling you. It was simply a matter of asking when she’d become aware of this happening, and how she’d react.

“—how is everything over there? Are my adorable babies and my handsome husband behaving well?”

“Were you expecting differently?” He teases with a smirk.

“No, of course not.” You giggle. “Mmm, well, maybe a bit from you.”

“Really? What for?” Naoya asks back, and when you give him silence, he just laughs. Oh, why must you tease him when he can’t do anything about it? If you weren’t so far away, that’d be another story. But until then… “My love, can you see who I’m with right now?”

“Oh, who is it—” you excitedly breathe, eager to see one of your kids after… well, 24 hours. You and Naoya call each other every single day, some of your children find it reasonably annoying.

Either way, it makes you grin as if it had been weeks since you last saw her—your cute Naohime nonchalantly playing, dressed up in that adorable light blue onesie one of your staff members got her a few days ago, which you’ve wanted to see on her for the longest! “Oh, Naohime! My sweet adorable little muffin, what are you doing cutie? Are you having fun with papa?”

She doesn’t respond nor look up to the phone, simply focused on the task at hand. She’s determined, all right... kind of reminds you of Naomi when she was younger.

Though slightly different in certain aspects as you soon remembered upon seeing Naoya beginning to “disturb” her.

“Wait, Naoya—”

“Come on, angel, say hi to mama.” Naoya lightly nudges her. “Don’t you miss her? She certainly misses you!”

“Naoya… she’s going to get angry…” you caution at the frown in her face already forming.

“It’s just a small hi, my love, it won’t be that bad—”

But to Naohime, it was; the gravest transgression yet! For the moment she catches wind of his intentions, she does not waste time to let him know of her disapproval, raising her hand, alongside her toy, to strike a loud smack! On his face, one that has him recoiling, hissing and whining at the burning, pulsating pain he didn’t think his daughter was capable of!

Well, at least she has a strong grip! He just hoped he hadn’t found out this way.

“Oh my god, Naoya, are you ok?!” You gasp, naturally concerned by your husband… as well as slightly amused by your daughter’s antics! You were out there dying trying your best to not laugh in front of him, but it was just so funny how quick she was to put him in his place! Thankfully, he didn’t seem too upset about the matter.

“Ye—yeah; I just—I was just caught off guard, that’s all.” Naoya says, rubbing his face just where he was hit. “I didn’t think our baby had that in her.”

“All of them have been like that, haven’t they? Strong I mean.”

“Yes, they have. Though Naohime has quite the punch…”

“Well, it’s not like our other babies went on smacking people when they weren’t happy.” You chuckled, Naoya joining you soon after. “We gotta do something about that though, can’t have her hitting her papa all the time… she’s going to ruin his handsome face!”

“Oh, and you would hate that, wouldn’t you?”

“Obviously, nothing but a nightmare!” You jest.

“I can’t wait to have you back.” Naoya murmurs. “When are you returning? I greatly miss you.”

“In a week or so.” You respond. “Will you still be able to pick me up from the airport?”

“I’ll go for you if you need me to.” At the thought of your husband and your babies flying over to Tokyo just to see you, like straight out of a movie, makes your heart swoon!

But as tempting as it was, it was better for them to wait for you at home. You have a small surprise for them, after all!

“It won’t be necessary—just you being there with our kids is enough for me.”

“You have something planned for us, don’t you?” you blush, startled by his quick wits.

“Don’t say anything! I want it to be a complete surprise!!”

“Alright, alright—I won’t check the bank statements either.”

“Haha… how funny…” you frown—it was only one time! “Well, I gotta go now, I just wanted to check in on you guys before it got too late.”

“Wait, do you want to see the rest before leaving?”

“Oh, yes please! If it’s possible!”

But the moment Naoya was to stand up from the bed, Naohime quickly grabs onto his sleeve, as if demanding he stay, or at least take her—a reaction that makes the two laugh at its irony: she might not like the attention, but that doesn’t mean she wants to be left alone!

“What is it, muffin? You want to go with me?” Naoya asked, and Naohime nodded. Ah, so she was ignoring the two… well, nothing they didn’t know already. “Alright, off we go to see your siblings.”

Naoya then swiftly picks her up, carefully holding her head against his chest as he made way towards the area he believed the rest of his kids to be—a loving sight that made you smile (would’ve thought that just moments ago Naohime had smacked him across the face?) as well as far more eager to return home, wanting to hug them tightly, never letting go, as you pepper their face with kisses, kisses, and more kisses!

Though cautiously with Naohime, for you wouldn’t want to meet a similar fate as Naoya—

But would you be able to control yourself? Probably not, there is no way you could with your adorable daughter. And that is a sacrifice you were willing to make.

The surprise is either you're pregnant again (unlikely, you got too many goddamn kids!!! Naoya needs to pull out) or you've got tickets to disneyland (courtesy of your dad) also, the bank statement thing is something I plan to write on about later on hahaha It's just something silly I think would happen between you and Naoya.

I hope you liked this little thing I wrote uwu I love the attention Naohime has been getting as of lately, we love our little gremlin 💖 jakhgjakshgjkashgjka I still can't believe she came from a dream haha.

Anyways, once again, thank you so much for sending in this ask!! Now, take care, and hope to see you soon 💖

[wallflowrence]

I am Manifesting the nahida and wanderer found family dynamic

THERE'S SO MUCH art of it it'd be sort of amusing if their relationship is reallt different in canon. though to be honest it would probably make more sense that way considering that (3.2 archon quest spoilers) [cont.]

part of nahida's character development is standing up for herself and not being tolerant to mistreatment. so considering the incidents scaramouche was involved in/his fight with buer (+ the traveller) - he even calls their battle a "re-enactment of the archon war" so ??? it would be a bit odd if (at least, immediately) they had that sort of dynamic

I do hope it develops into something more positive though . I think. nahida is a very benevolent god and she definitely pities scara. his upbringing has contributed to him having a very skewed sense of the world and self so I feel that in later parts of the story he'll end up developing his own identity and realising his past mistakes

ALSO I think it's interesting how scara has a track record of trying to determine his own identity/fate (naming himself kunikuzushi, joining the fatui, participating in the god creation project) when in reality he isn't at all. he's obsessed with becoming a god - even now he's attempting to realise Ei's ideals, despite the fact that it's been. so long???

dottore doesn't care about scaramouche. his involvement with the project was one that, in how i interpreted it, was just out of grand fun and curiosity. i remember it being said somewhere that he's not so much for the results of an experiment compared to the process --> he does things for the sake of doing them. conclusions r a 2nd priority

in childe's story quest (iirc) dottore was the one that opened and monitored the ruin guard factory and he just left it because he'd gotten bored. he declares himself a scholar at core, so of course he likes learning about things, but I dont think he's inherently fueled by a desire for knowledge... it's more of a secondary motivation but that's just what I am inferring based on what we know

I feel like this is the best way I can put it: dottore was the kid that put salt on slugs not really because he was curious in observing the reason for the reaction but because he enjoys seeing them suffer LMAO

if you don't know what happens when u put salt on slugs or snails basically they dry up and die. because osmosis !! funky. it's very painful for them If my memory serves right

even the akedemiya didn't care about who their god was so long as they felt it represented their ideals for humanity: scara was their optimum of human wisdom. and scaramouche KNOWS this; we even see the traveller confront him about it but he deflects after they ask him. perhaps he was just that desperate

I pulled these from a random YouTube video shh but anyways.

that's why he cares so much about haypasia !! because she recognises him. I saw a post on twitter or on here a while ago and I can't find it but some1 said something like "scara (in the current archon quest) feels like a child who never got much attention growing up and is just doing things to get his mother to notice him" and yeah I feel like it really does come off like that

Ei set him off and gave him the freedom to be his own person and go live as he wished but he's always been shackled to other people's expectations. he's never actually been his own person. I think a part of him *knows* that, but hasnt yet come to terms with it and moved on from his past . I think that's the next step he'll take

considering the fact that he's in nahida's possession at the moment I think she'll be a key figure to the development of his character. her as well as the traveller (big surprise !!!) Even if she doesn't see redemption in him I think she'll help him come to some realisations about himself

this is so messy srry

[unlimitedhorsepower]

Tagged by: @thevoiceofthanatos​

Favorite color: warm bright yellow, mustard yellow & old gold, and just yellow in general. its a good colour. it makes me happy

Currently reading: idk, probably star trek fanfic my friend @rubbertplant​ was writing to give my opinion on it. i often read through my own stuff too lol, like whoah i wrote that??? ADHD has taken everything from me including my capability to read though, for real. ive been thinking of trying to listen to some audiobooks recently though, this cannot continue... its just that i also have no ears disease so idk how well that would go. determined to try though

Last song you listened to: havent been listening to music so much bc ive been playing videos instead but my last.fm has all my spotify listens so itll stay up to date on whatever i listened to last. currently seems to be “please play-bite” by pinocchioP. i often just let spotify play me whatever it recommends anyhow so theres variance. and i only started this account like a few months ago max so its not really a full picture of my music-listening

Last movie (in theaters): its not really a movie, but if it counts, the first ginga nagareboshi gin stageplay (recorded and released in finland in theaters with subs)

ginga was always huge in finland for some reason. idk. the anime is so violent though that i got really afraid of bears for some reason. theres so much blood... i never read the manga either i just knew of the anime and partook in my share of wolf roleplays (dogs were uncool! so i didnt do dog roleplays. iirc that really was my reason).

heres some funny wolves from my wolf rp days

2010. one of the first things i coloured digitally... i painstakingly cleaned the scanned pencil lineart with a mouse

2011. i had gotten my first drawing tablet as a birthday/xmas gift and practiced a ton around this time (more than just wolves lol)

Last series I watched: trigun stampede. even changed my phone bg into vash... but millions knives is probably my favourite. he just does everything wrong and makes his life worse. and everyone elses life too bc he sucks. but hes multifaceted so hes also my meow meow and whatever. i hope a ford explorer drives over him

if it counts though, ive seen some star trek TOS episodes and movies because my friends have been watching them. im not super into it but its always fun to hang. i also dont watch a lot of stuff. i dont even know what i do. guy who doesnt read or watch things but listens to jerma videos on youtube without actually looking at them while i “draw” and “write”

Craving: food honestly. i should cook something lmfao. i also want soda so bad but i dont have any. id make some tea but its disgustingly warm in my house so i only want cool drinks. could kill for a nice milkshake or a smoothie rn i think

Tea or coffee: tea... im the only finnish person who doesnt drink coffee for real. also got really into loose leaf tea bc i befriended a chinese lady who is really into tea and has a tea shop in the city near where i live

Currently working on: drawing this and trying to think how i want to do it. somehow want to incorporate flat colours and maybe shade his body naturally, and make the blood look realistic instead of flat colours... hmm not sure yet what i want to do

other than that im trying to proofread the chapter of my ryanyuri fanfic i already published because theres a lot of typos and strange sentences in there but its been a chore bc my body breaks down when it gets too warm smfh... not looking forward to when my apt goes over 30 degrees celsius it is unlivable. im also trying to complete a “lookbook” of my tnb sims. but i always start huge projects that take three million years to complete and im really slow lmfao

Tag people you’d like to get to know better: i could just ask these questions from everyone i talk on discord with. fuck my friends i know irl or otherwise, only asking people who r my friends through tumblr. no need to do this though. also this isnt probably meant to be answered so long-windedly... thats just me. i cant answer with one word i gotta write an essay. heres three tags though @basslinegrave​ @vita-divata​

(record scratch before 3rd tag) and @rubbertplant​ bc they were streaming a game in discord when i started typing this and i was like hey wanna do it and they were like yeah

i expect replies on my desk by 5pm TOMORROW!!!!get to work!!!! no i jest, do it or dont, i dont mind either way, just if you feel like doing this. if you see this and want to do it feel free to consider yourself tagged. godspeed

[disorganizedkitten]

Is it really safe?

Miraculous Ladybug | 2018 | 803 | Ao3

Tikki has had many chosens. Most had similar traits, such as determination, creativity, protectiveness, resourcefulness and similar. This one also had some perks of her own, like the inability to speak to her crush, the ability to love anyone and everyone, her tendency to overreact, etc. The biggest difference between her and any previous chosen though? This was her first chosen who liked to steal. Good news is, that makes it painfully hard to blackmail her. And plenty easy to get a troublesome recording back from Alya. Except, Alya doesn’t have the recording anymore.

“Marinette! This is a bad idea!” Tikki warned, waving her little arms wildly as they reached the locker room.

“Come on Tikki, it’s the best idea we have,” Marinette argued, peeking around the corner.

“You could alway just ask Alya.”

“And when she asks why I need her phone? Because that will totally happen without her finding out.”

Tikki sighed. Technically, this was partially her fault. But also Technically, she got to blame Trixx for leaving the phone on record. But, Tikki was a bigger Kwami than that. She’d take the blame, and hope this could be fixed before any real damage was done.

But did Marinette’s plan to delete the video have to involve stealing Alya’s phone, again?

“Tikki, can you take my phone over to the bathroom and call Alya?”

“As a distraction?” Tikki guessed.

“Yep.”

“But then won’t she be on her phone?”

Marinette frowned. “You’re right. Darn.”

Tikki watched as Marinette surveyed the area, trying to figure out another way to get the phone back. Now, being a smart Kwami with morals, Tikki knew she shouldn’t encourage this. But being a Kwami who’s chosen was not ready to be discovered, she knew that they had to get that phone back. Preferably before Alya got on the school blog to post the video.

Which meant she had to be as helpful as possible. “Can I be a distraction in another way?”

“Maybe,” Marinette trailed off, pursing her lips. That was her idea face.

“If I go talk to Alya and put her phone in her bag, can you navigate it and delete the video?”

Tikki blinked. That was such an obvious solution! Why hadn’t one of them thought of that before?

Tikki nodded and dove into Marinette’s purse, ready to help. She’d have to work off vocal cues, but she could.

“Hey Alya! Are you ready for class?”

“Yeah, mostly. I got a little held up from that Akuma though.”

“Oh really? Which Akuma was today’s?” Tikki almost facepalmed. Marinette in act natural™ mode was anything but ‘Natural’.

“Uh, that crazy yellow one. Honeybear,” Alya answered, confusion and concern coloring her tone.

“Oh, that one! Hahaha! She was a little weird, am I right?” Tikki fazed through Marinette’s purse and flitted behind Alya, heading to Alya’s backpack.

“Yeah,” Alya paused, and Tikki felt the backpack move around her. Alya must have leaned forward. “Marinette are you okay?”

“Psh! Of course I’m okay! Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Marinette? You’re lying again.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about! Why would I lie?”

“She’s horrible at this,” Trixx said, her tail swishing as she came into view.

“I know,” Tikki sighed, “But it’s the best she can do right now. Where’s Alya’s phone?”

“Why do you need her phone Tikki?” Trixx asked, floating closer.

“You left the camera on,” Tikki answered, starting to dig around.

“Uh oh,” Both Kwamis and Alya froze at Marinette’s comment.

“Marinette?”

“Alya, please tell me you didn’t give your phone to Adrien so he could watch today’s battle.”

“I might’ve why?” The backpack shifted again. “Marinette, did you do the leave recording on thing again?”

“Maybe?”

Tikki nodded at Trixx and shot out of Alya’s backpack, finding Marinette’s purse quick enough.

“Right. Let’s go get it, before he sees whatever ‘Marinette’ thing it is that you recorded.”

“Yes please, thank you!”

Adrien rewound the video to just before Marinette transformed and watched it again. There was no way. It had to be a ploy, right?

But why would Alya do something like that? And why would Marinette go along with it?

Just, what?

“Hey Adrien?” Alya’s voice made him turn. She and a nervous Marinette were walking his way, Alya waving.

“What’s up Alya?” Adrien wanted to ask about the video. Boy did he want to ask. But now, in the middle of the locker room, was not the time.

“I forgot my phone at Marinette’s house and left the camera on, so there’s a bunch of Marinette feature footage that I need to edit out,” Alya explained with a smile.

“Oh, sure, here,” Adrien handed the phone back to Alya, but Marinette swiped it back and started hitting buttons.

“Sheesh girl! What were you doing while I was gone?”

“Stuff no one needs to see, not even you Alya,” Marinette replied, smiling and handing the phone back. “Thank you.”

Alya rolled her eyes. “Right. Why don’t you two go ahead to class and I’ll find Nino?” She was gone before either teen could say a thing.

Marinette laughed nervously, “Actually, what’d you know? I forgot my notebook, seeyouinclassbye!” Marinette dashed off as well.

“Not a girlfriend, eh?” Adrien turned to Plagg and scowled.

“That might’ve been a fluke,” he replied.

“It also might not be. What’re you gonna do about it?”

“Keep her secret safe.”

[humansun]

mom pls b okaaay

Written June 28th, 2023 at 9:36AM

The gym really helps me get out of my comfort zone each day. I’m glad that my friends invite me and that I get to go every weekday at 5:30AM.

Something I’ve been trying to implement into every moment of my life is the “sexy walk” or better posture, essentially. Whenever I walk somewhere, even to the kitchen, I try to remind myself to sexy walk to practice gracefulness. I usually walk quite lazily but walking sexy will be a great practice.

I learned that when I binge watch Youtube videos, it’s kind of a bad addiction. It’s like using a drug I have constant access to in order to pacify my brain and not think or do anything else. Every once in a while, I do see why I want to participate in escapism, but if I could help it, I don’t want to. I like my brain being present and mindful of what’s happening. My escapism should be into my books.

I’m reading two at once by the way! Which is a first in a long time, but it’s going well. I’m learning different things with both books, and it’s sort of like writing two different scripts or building creativity in other ways than just one. 

At this moment, I’d like to make a personal shoutout to the local library that really holds me down. I love the little getaway space that I have to write and focus on myself without any distracting voices or noises that keep me away from my work. It’s awesome that it’s public and I get to borrow books for free!

Yesterday, I built out a really awesome presentation for work today and I’m looking forward to showing it. However, I do have a pretty busy agenda for the day and anticipating achieving most the tasks I have waiting for me to complete. It will be a great day because I said so, plus I’m listening to the Pasadena playlist!

I’m really hoping the ClassPass works when I arrive at the locations because it would suck if it didn’t. Shout out to cousins who love you and look out for you. Shout out to friends who like to listen to what you’re learning so they can learn too. Shout out to romantic partners who support you even if you feel like a useless sack of potatoes.

A part of me is very certain of my abilities and the other side of me doubts it. It’s like knowing that I could act like KC3 consistently, but also doubting myself and fearing that I’ll be too much, you know? But I’m not too much. I’m just right for the Betty I am. BRB! Checking if my mom left to work yet.

Okay. She hasn’t left. I need to eat the pumpkin seed mini bar when I get hungry. Anyways, I have plenty to do today and I’m going to get it done because I said so. My anxiety about my mom’s health is ramping up a little bit, just because there is so much uncertainty around her ear disease. My constant worry is a sudden death that would shake up my life, so I want to prevent it as much as I can.

My plan is to go with my mom to the USC medical center and request for her medical records. That way, we can investigate on what the doctor’s notes were and determine from there, how we can move forward? I also want to reach out to my uncle and see what he says about his own ear surgery - not sure if he had cholesteotoma though.

I miss my sister and I feel very blessed. I think I have more than I deserve in life. I am grateful for everything that I do have and it feels great to remind myself that. Okay, plenty to do today! Chat later.

Written 12:57PM

I’m excited, I’ve excited, I’m excited. I’m excited. I am EXCITED!

[likesomekindofcheese]

I just wanted to request something for the Beatles, please. How Would the Beatles whoo their love interest? Like how would they pine after they or her

Ooooo! OOOOOOO! That's a good one! I even got to reread bits of Cynthia Lenon's memoirs about John Lennon to research this in addition to my own observations and my theory on what their Love Languages would be.

No warnings, just a lot of fluff!

Reader here is gender neutral!

Each Beatle trying to woo someone they're interested in would include...

John

John would play the guitar. He’d be that guy on a college campus who just plays songs to try and score. He would bring it around with him slung on his back and try to win you by his attempts to play whatever song you request.

When he looks at you, his face softens. It loses its cynical expression. He begins to relax and lets his guard down.

He’d give you “wicked commentary” to make you laugh anytime. He would think of some god quips and be more chatty on purpose.

But then he would give you compliments. There's be compliments complimenting how you looked or on your outfit or about some accomplishment or thing you did!

He’d also dance with you. If there was a party or something and music was on, he would dance with you but it would be a slower, more romantic song.

Then he’d plainly ask you out. You would be overjoyed and say yes and have the best time! :)

Paul

Paul likes to (attempt to and sometimes genuinely) COOK. So he would definitely whip up something and then bring it over in a pan or a bag for you as a treat.

But let's get one thing clear: He is a HUGE ASS FLIRT. He'd be on your side like a puppy and lay it on thick. There is no subtlety with this man.

But also He buys you little gifts. If there was a record or tickets to a movie (cause then you would *gasp* have to go with him!) or anything with your interests, he would find it out and give it to you.

He’d be bowled over and amazed by you and just frickin’ stare at you like the eighth wonder of the world.

Paul I think would then think of some creative way to ask you out like attaching it to a flower or some new gloves or something. You would just grin and accept it, kissing him on the cheek to make him blush.

George

He is very shy though and would muster up the courage to even talk to you. The boys would encourage and hype him up as he walks over to ask you about the weather as they stand in the back with popcorn.

He’d be the type already daydreaming about your wedding and more 😉. He really hopes no one notices him spacing out but he knows that if he keeps asking you about the weather or what's on TV then it's a step closer to his fantasies coming true!

He would joke around and tease you like John, but he is careful never to cross any lines because he respects you so much!

he’d get defensive and try to protect you physically. If someone was getting mad at you, he'd step in between and put an arm over you to keep you safe or place a hand on your shoulder.

He's a more physical gesture kind of guy. His heart explodes on the inside when you consent for him to hug you.

But he has a lot of strength and determination to get you to date him. He would finally ask you out and go on that date at last! Once you are steady, he is more laid back!

Ringo

He’d want to protect and shelter you! Because he's small and had a vulnerable past, he would want to use that to protect you! He’d also cling onto your hand for security and even if you got a little cold.

Like George, he would get all defensive. But his are more verbal. He would talk things out with you or dress down anyone who crosses paths with you. He would then lead you away and comfort you about whatever happened.

He would want to DANCE with you and ask you to dance!! But unlike John, it would be faster and more fun as you both lose yourself and have fun! He would just beam at your smile.

He'd make excuses to spend more time with you. He'd walk you to places, stay longer at parties, etc.

He would take photos and videos of you to flirt with you because he finds you so gorgeous!! But of course, he'd try to be sneaky about it but if you agree to a picture with him, he'd just melt.

When you are hanging out, just getting some snacks and a soda at a diner, that's when he asks you out. Though you joke that this is a technical first date and you both laugh and smile, making promises to go to a nicer restaurant tomorrow as an official couple.

Taglist: @queenlover05 @0x0spunky-monkey0x0 @yourlocalmusicalprostitute

[five-rivers]

Solutions to Nonlinear Equations

For @currentlylurking for the Phic Phight.  :)

.

“Ancients, Vlad.  I’m not rejecting you because I’m a rebellious teenager and you’re an adult, I’m rejecting you because you’re incredibly creepy.”

Vlad sniffed in what he hoped was an aristocratic manner and raised an eyebrow, minutely adjusting his grip on Daniel to keep him pinned to the floor.  

“We’re human-ghost hybrids, Daniel.  I’d hoped that you’d have realized by now that we are meant to be ‘creepy.’”

Daniel squirmed and began to mutter into the carpet. “Clockwork never acts like this, I’m fine with him—”

Vlad pulled back as if burned.  He hadn’t heard that name in—in—

In a long time.  

Years.  

The thought was almost expelled from his head when Daniel managed to elbow him in the jaw hard enough to make him see stars. Before he knew it, Daniel had slipped from his grasp and zoomed away.  

Whatever aspersions Vlad cast on Daniel’s mastery of his ghostly abilities, the boy was fast.  When he put his mind to escaping instead of picking a fight, he managed it more often than not, to Vlad’s great frustration.  Hence Vlad’s usual strategy of needling the younger half-ghost until fighting was the only thing on Daniel’s mind.  

He set down on a nearby roof.  There went his plans for the day.  Which, admittedly, had consisted of distracting Daniel while his ghostly minions set up a nasty surprise for him at the school, hence making him fail his test, which would, in turn, convince Maddie and Jack to let Vlad set Daniel up with a tutor, something he had suggested to them earlier, and—

Well.  Daniel would find them, now, no doubt.  

Ah, well.  

He had more important things on his mind, now.  Such as, how in two worlds did Daniel know Clockwork?  Because Daniel never just said things like that.  He barely knew anything about ghost culture.  He wouldn’t know to bring up obscure, secretive, ghost historical figures.  He wouldn’t know what that particular name would mean to Vlad.  

Tongues of fire flared out of his fingers, bringing a measure of stability to the gyrations of his core and his emotions.  

Daniel knew Clockwork.  And, it seemed, met him with some regularity.  Enough for him to compare his actions to Vlad’s.  

Would that ghost never be satisfied with ruining Vlad’s life?  Was he not satisfied with—

He cut off the thought, shaking his head.  Never mind that.  

What Vlad needed to do was find Clockwork.  Which meant inducing Danny to go to him at a time when Vlad when Vlad could follow.  Which meant determining when he had visited Clockwork in the past.  An undertaking to be sure.  

He closed his eyes and teleported to his lab beneath his mansion.  

“Maddie!” he called out, even before his body had fully reformed.  

The hologram flickered to life with a faint crackled from the projector.  “What is it, sugarpie?” it asked with a smile.

“Review the audio recordings from Fentonworks,” ordered Vlad.  “Search for the term ‘Clockwork.’  Report findings to me.”

“Sure thing, honey!”

Vlad had to review the cheerfulness settings on the Maddie program.  Maddie was upbeat, but not that upbeat.  This was almost sickly sweet.  

He threw himself into a nearby chair.  

Clockwork.  He thought he’d never hear that name again.  Not after he’d been literally and figuratively ghosted by him.  

He telekinetically pulled a book off his shelf. He ran his fingers over the leather tooling on the cover.  The book had been given to him by Clockwork, years ago, when he was still in that hospital.

Clockwork had been the one to first show him the Ghost Zone, and all the wonders in it.  Clockwork had been his friend, his only friend, through that long, agonizing hospital stay. He had been supportive, wonderful, kind. He visited often, though not on a regular schedule.  He’d helped Vlad ride out the waves of misery and anger that so often threatened to overwhelm him.  

Then, without warning, nothing.  

No goodbye.  The last time he left, he had even said something along the lines of ‘see you soon,’ although the memory was frayed from age and Vlad could no longer recall the exact words.  For a long time, Vlad had worried something disastrous had happened to Clockwork. But then he had finally managed to build his own portal, reach the Ghost Zone under his own power, and, according to every search he did, every line of inquiry that bore fruit, Clockwork was just fine.  

Vlad had been furious.  He had been betrayed.  He had spent the better half of a decade trying to plot revenge against Clockwork, before realizing that was akin to plotting revenge against a god and turning his sights to a more manageable target.  

Now…

Now, Vlad just wanted answers.  Both as to the reason behind his abandonment and as to why Clockwork was apparently repeating history with Daniel.  

“Sweetie pie,” said the hologram, with a chime, “audio processing complete.  There are over ninety-nine instances where the word ‘clockwork’ is mentioned.  Would you like to play the selected files?”

“Yes,” said Vlad.  “Include the video portions where available, and the thirty seconds immediately prior to and following the mention.”

He turned his attention to the nearest screen.  He had a lot of videos to watch.  

There was an envelope pinned to it.  It was sealed with wax, impressed with the image of a pocket watch and the initials CW.  Vlad attempted, and failed, to suppress the growl that grew in the back of his throat. Was this a joke to Clockwork?

He tore the envelope from the screen, ripped it open with equal viciousness, and began to read.

.

Three cups sat on the tea service tray next to the teapot.

“Are you expecting someone else,” asked Danny, “or am I going to break one of these?”

Clockwork chuckled as he began to pour the tea.  “The former,” he said.  “Although you may always surprise me with the latter.”

He handed Danny his cup.  Danny inhaled deeply.  It smelled sweet.  “What is it?” he asked.  

“A chamomile blend,” said Clockwork.  “For calm.”

“I think Sam drinks chamomile before she goes to bed,” observed Danny, offhandedly.  “Who’s coming?”

“You’ll see soon enough.”

Danny made a face.  “Do you have to be mysterious all—”

The front door of Clockwork’s lair slammed open, and Danny jolted forward in alarm – the only people who regularly did that were the Observants, who didn’t much care for Danny – but Clockwork put a steadying hand on his shoulder and rewound his tea into his cup.

“Clockwork!” came the expected yell.  The yeller, however…

“Is that Vlad?” asked Danny, not quite scandalized, but more than a little surprised.  

“Why, yes,” said Clockwork.  

“Did you – Clockwork, did you invite him here?”

“Other than the Observants,” said Clockwork, “no one can enter unless I will it.”  He took a sip of his tea.  

“But,” started Danny.  

Clockwork raised a hand.  “Don’t worry, he’ll find us soon enough.”  He repurposed the hand to pat Danny’s knee.  “And even should he prove to be in a combative mood, I will not allow you to come to harm.  You are safe here, Daniel.”

“Thanks,” mumbled Danny, looking away, towards the door in the sitting room through which Vlad would presumably enter.  

Sure enough, a few seconds later Vlad half-flew half-skidded into Clockwork’s sitting room.  He leveled an accusatory finger at Clockwork.  “You!” he proclaimed, with a great deal of venom.  

“Hello, Vladimir, I’ve poured you some tea.  Why don’t you sit down?  I understand it has been some time.”

“You under-?  No!  I will not sit down!  I will not drink your tea.  Not after you abandoned me for over a decade, just like that bumbling oaf—”

“Hey!” interjected Danny, not only because Vlad had once again insulted his father, but because he could tell that Clockwork, regardless of his stoic façade, was actually quite upset.  

“Don’t interrupt me, Daniel,” snapped Vlad.  “You don’t know what this, this ghost is. What he does.  You don’t know that he gets close to you, makes you think you’re friends, and then drops you without a moment’s notice.  Did you think it was funny to string along a man in dire straits? Did you?”

“I did not abandon you, Vladimir, I—”

Vlad scoffed and went on a tirade that Danny honestly found hard to parse.  But it sounded like Vlad and Clockwork had known each other in the past and then fallen out of contact in a way that aggravated Vlad’s abandonment issues.  Which didn’t seem like Clockwork at all, but Vlad sounded extremely certain and insistent, and Clockwork’s upset was actually finding its way into his voice, now.  Danny didn’t—

With all the force and abruptness of epiphany, Danny realized what was going on here.  

“Wait, wait, wait,” said Danny, putting down his cup. “Vlad, breathe or whatever.  Clockwork, you did tell Vlad that you experience time nonlinearly, right?”

“Of course,” said Clockwork, clearly offended.

“But Vlad, ah, had you gone through natural portals often when you met Clockwork?  Or, like, did you ever see him without him initiating contact?”

“I didn’t have my portal built yet, Daniel, so, no.”

Danny turned to Clockwork.  “Why did you-?  No that doesn’t matter.  Haaauuuhh, Clockwork, do you have-?”

Clockwork waved a hand and a whiteboard appeared.  

“Thanks,” said Danny, picking a marker up from the little shelf on the bottom.  He uncapped it, then recapped it.  “Actually, before that.  Vlad—” he pointed at Vlad, who looked about one second from exploding “—you have some idea of how old Clockwork is, right?  Or at least how old ghosts can get?”

“Yes, Daniel,” said Vlad, managing to overlay his supercilious ‘I know better than you’ attitude over his still obvious anger.

“Okay, great.  So, just to establish, Clockwork has been around at least since, uh, beginning of time?”

“Give or take,” agreed Clockwork.  “Although I have not experienced it all directly.”

“Right,” said Danny.  “Just, already, his perception of time is different from our because of age differences.”

Vlad looked slightly less angry, and slightly closer to curious.  

“But, then, there’s the larger issue,” continued Danny.  This time his uncapping of the marker was decisive.  He drew a flat, straight, horizontal line across the whiteboard.  “This is our timeline.  We deal with time linearly.  We’ve also got, I don’t know, parallel timelines, like this.”  He drew several more lines.  “You following so far?”

“Yes, Daniel, I’ve read my share of science fiction.”

He was probably rolling his eyes.  Curse his solid-colored red eyes.  It made interpreting his looks and figuring out where he was looking during a fight much more difficult.  

“Anyway, Clockwork isn’t on any of these lines. Because he experiences time nonlinearly.”  He drew a squiggly up and down line on the board that resembled the world’s saddest sine wave.  Or cosine wave.  There wasn’t a y-axis on the not-quite-graph, so it wasn’t like anyone could tell the difference.  They were effectively the same.  

And Vlad still made fun of him for failing math. Danny knew plenty about math.  He just didn’t have time to do the work.  Mostly because of Vlad.  

“Now, that, that is Clockwork’s timeline.  It isn’t always in contact with ours.  It’s, like, solutions to a system of equations. Nonlinear equations,” he specified, in case it had been too long since Vlad had encountered basic high-school-level algebra.

“It is somewhat more complicated than that, Daniel,” said Clockwork, exasperated.  “It’s more of—"  

“Yeah, but this gets the idea across more than the whole parade metaphor, doesn’t it?”

“I would say not.  This doesn’t even begin to touch on my abilities.”

“That’s because we’re just talking about your perception of time,” said Danny.  He considered for a moment.  “And also your ability to interact with our timeline.”

“Which includes my ability to perceive multiple timelines.”

“But that’s complicated, and I still don’t get it,” complained Danny.  

“It is less complicated than what you are currently trying to explain.”

“To you maybe, but the whole point of this is that you aren’t seeing things the same way we are.  You disappeared on Vlad, what, a decade ago?”  He looked to Vlad for confirmation.  

“A decade is hardly any time at all,” said Clockwork with exasperation.  He sipped at his tea.  

“It was fifteen years.”

Clockwork made a somewhat dismissive motion with a gloved hand.  “It’s a tiny fraction of your life as a whole.”

“It’s… closer to a third of his current lifetime,” said Danny with a wince.  “Or a fourth?  I don’t know how old you are, dude.”

“I went to college with your parents.”

“I know, and you were already graying then. Your age is weirdly hard to place.”

Vlad gave Danny a look, but his body language was no longer screaming ‘I’m going to beat the snot after you.’  Danny counted that as a win under the current circumstances.  He disliked Vlad, but in a fight with Clockwork… Well, Clockwork could demolish just about anyone.  

Not that Clockwork would.  Just that he could.  

“Daniel—”

“Please, Vladimir.  Just sit down.  Try the tea. I made it for you.  I knew you would be upset, although I could not see exactly why.”  Clockwork was almost pouting, now.  “Fifteen years is such a short time.”

“Clockwork, I’m fifteen.”

“I know,” said Clockwork, patting Danny on the knee. “Your timeline is so small.  And cute.”

Vlad was now distinctly on his back foot, offput and disarmed.  “His timeline is cute?”

“It is.  Don’t worry, yours is almost as cute.”

Vlad opened and closed his mouth like a dying fish. Danny pushed the whiteboard away.

“Don’t worry about it too much,” he said.  “Like I said, different perception of time.”

“I really didn’t mean to make you feel abandoned, Vladimir.  I simply wanted to give you some time to, ah, how should I put this?  Have space?  Find yourself?”

Vlad sat heavily on the couch.  

“You get used to it,” said Danny.  “But, Clockwork, do you think you can talk him into having fewer evil plans?  Because, really.  There are way too many.  Like, one a week.  They’re destroying my grades.  Have you ever seen anyone else who had weekly evil plans?”

“Evil plans, Vladimir?  Really?”

[5c13nt15t96]

The “Breakup”

“Porfa, no vuelvas a buscarme.”

Emilia

She’s walking away, from me, from us. And I don’t know what to do. I watch helplessly, her figure steadily becoming smaller and smaller, until I can’t see her anymore. I lean back into the couch, releasing a breath I hadn’t realized I’d been holding since she turned her back on me. ‘Why can’t this damn chair just swallow me whole?’ I thought, my jaw clenched and my eyelids blinking rapidly. I take quick and discrete glances left and right, I have to make sure no one is watching me struggle to hold back my tears. Of sadness for what I’ve lost or of anger because I can’t fix it? I wish I knew.

Why can’t Andi understand how important this is? That she is my priority, even if she didn’t start out that way. What other choice do I have at staying in Mexico? Sebas is, for a lack of a better term, a fucking idiot, but I need him in order to seal my chances of staying here, with Andi. She may not want anything to do with me now, but I still want everything to do with her. For me, she is everything. With her perfectly soft brown skin and long dark hair, she’s always had me convinced that she is exactly what the tattoo that lays across her abdomen suggests. An angel. My perfect Angel.

I’ll fix this, I’ll figure something out. I know I will, how could I not? I’m Emilia Alo, I’m nothing if not determined and persistent. When this is all over and I’ve won the Battle of the Bands, I’ll do whatever it takes to win Andi back. No matter what!

‘I’ve got this!’ I think enthusiastically, as I shoot straight up from my seat. That definitely got people’s attention; so many of them staring at me. Can they tell what’s wrong? Did they hear?

“What?” I exclaim, looking at them all, daring them to keep studying me. Every last one of them makes haste to avert their gaze away from me. I might be breaking down inside but I’ve still got it! That small, but mighty, boost in confidence is just what I need to put my feet into motion, steering myself out of the crowded cafeteria and into the halls.

As I walk down the locker-lined walkways, I hold my head high, my gaze heated and pointed directly in front of me. I need to put on a brave face because, well, that’s who I am. But that doesn’t mean I’m not hoping to catch a glimpse of Andi. I just want her to look at me, really look at me, and see that what I feel for her trumps everything. That I truly am doing this to be with her. Fucking Sebas! Why did he have to sabotage their video? I understand his desire to win, more than I’d care to admit, but it was completely unfair. Andi (and her friends, I guess) deserves to be in the Finals, showing all of EWS just how stupidly talented she is! There’s still a chance they could perform, and I hope that they can figure something out. But I have to focus: win, sign a record deal, get permission to stay in Mexico, and win my girl back (not necessarily in that order).

Just as I’m about to turn the corner, I see Andi standing against the far wall, her small friend (MJ, I think) talking animatedly at her. I can tell that Andi isn’t listening, at least not completely. That her mind is somewhere else. The look on her face breaks my heart; a heart-clenching mix of sorrow and anger. It kills me to know that I caused that mixture. I will fix this! I slow my steps, if only a little, to have a better chance at catching her eyes, for even just a second. And just like they, our eyes meet. I try to convey all that I feel for her in that one gaze but it is cut short. I watch as her nostrils flare ever so slightly before she pointedly turns away from me and toward MJ. And, with that, my heart breaks again. ‘I’m so sorry, Andi. I promise I will make this right. I just need some time. Hopefully you’ll understand, in the end.’

~~~~~~~

Andi

I should have known better from the start. I should have known that she would never choose me over winning or over fucking Sebas! She pretends as if she feels bad for all that happened to my friends and I, but she is still following behind Sebas. He can’t be the option only she has to win, he just can’t. He’s a snake, and he will pay for taking Emilia away from me. And for what he’s done to my band, of course. At least my priorities are in the right place. Well, I guess, now they aren’t, since I don’t have Emilia to put first anymore.

“Good riddance,’ I think, ‘it just wasn’t meant to be.’ I know that isn’t true, it can’t be. Emilia is the girl of my dreams, the only one I want to spend every second of every minute of every hour with. But she just doesn’t want the same. Or, at least, she isn’t willing to giving up what hurts me most to hold onto what we have. Had. HAD! I let out a deep breath, forcing the thought, that word, through my mind. What Emilia and I HAD was special, especially for me. But that’s over now. I do hope she wins, even if it is with Sebas. At least that way the shitty way I feel right now would be worth it. Kind of. In whatever fucked up way that might be.

I’m pulled out of my daze by MJ, as she appears directly in front of me. I stop in my tracks to make sure that I don’t knock her over. She’s still upset, understandably. I gently take her arm, guiding her over to the lockers to my right, I am not in the moo to get run down by anybody today. She’s talking at a mile a minute but I can’t even begin to try to follow what she’s saying. I feel for her, I do. She’s my closest friend here and I don’t know what I’d without her here if her parents were to pull her from EWS. But I can’t get my mind of off Emilia, no matter how hard I try. If she really wants to stay in Mexico to be with me, why is she letting here think that she is with Sebas?

When we’re alone, it’s great. Not only do I get to have her to myself, but I also get to be showered in her affection. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forget the feeling of her lips against mine, the way her hands fit perfectly with mine, or the way her eyes light up just slightly every time I make her laugh. I’ve lived for that, since that very first kiss, maybe even before. And now....

Why did I go along with it? Being her dirty little secret, even though she always said I wasn’t? Honestly, I didn’t think that she’d continue with that for so long. I thought that maybe, just maybe, I would be enough. That I would be what she needed to give her the push to kick Sebas to the curb and realize that she doesn’t need anyone to win. Because, on top of everything else that she has been blessed with, her talent is out of this world. Everybody can see it, so why can’t she? I guess it isn’t my problem anymore....

MJ still talking and, while I know I really should listen to her, I just can’t focus. I turn to press my back up against the lockers, my head lolling to the right to let MJ know that I am least aware of her being there even if I have absolutely no idea what she’s trying to tell me. Out of the corner of my eye, I catch a glimpse of Emilia, her head held high, walking down the hall like she’s on a mission, and I make a conscious effort to keep my eye firmly on MJ’s face. It takes everything I have within me not to look at her, because I know that, if I do, there is no guarantee that I wouldn’t go right back to her. I don’t want to be in that cycle again, I can’t be in that cycle again. There’s nothing I’d love more than to be able to just walk up beside her and laced our hands together or throw my arm around her shoulder. But that’s the whole point, isn’t? I can’t do that, not matter how much I want, no matter how much she says she’s wants the same. Because, outside of our tiny little universe, no knows what we are, and according to her, nobody can.

I always said that she hated him, that my hatred for him was only but a step further than hers. Was I wrong this whole time? Maybe that was just me trying to convince myself that I played a larger role with her than I really did. But she was always calling him an idiot...that doesn’t mean anything! How could I have been so stupid? To let my feelings for her come before the way I feel about myself? Truth is, I’d do it all again just to be close to her.

I’ve lost the most beautiful woman I have ever been lucky enough to behold. I know this is probably what’s best but why does it have to hurt so much?

[jungshookz]

miss cee pd i have a request!!!! how about e2l tae x y/n but they're in law school and they're always arguing and debating inside and outside of the classroom and tae being a little shit is like "you wanna kiss me so bad" and they both don't realise that there's mistletoe above them which jimin put because he was tired of watching them constantly argue and wanted to fiZzle the tension hehe and then they KITH,, i hope this isn't too long aha

➺ pairing; kim taehyung x reader

➺ genre; sfw!! enemies to lovers!! everyone’s in law school!! mostly y/n and taehyung bickering with each other and wanting to jump each other’s bones at the same time

➺ wordcount; 4.3k

➺ what to expect; “don’t flatter yourself. i would rather throw myself into oncoming traffic than kiss you, kim taehyung.”

                                     »»————-　❄　————-««

“-now, the particular case study that was assigned to our group involves a civil action for medical negligence and a criminal prosecution for gross negligence manslaughter, which means that there are seven elements that we need to hit when we’re acting out our simulation next class,” you explain, flipping to the next page of your notebook with a flick of your wrist, “firstly, the client - jimin - must be interviewed so that we may determine the facts that surround the claim/prosecution. secondly, we need to draft witness statements - from hoseok and namjoon - and assess the legal efficacy of said statements. thirdly, we must assess the propriety of police interrogation from officer jungkook of the defend-”

you pause when a crumpled piece of paper lands by your left foot and you clear your throat quietly before stepping over it and continuing to pace back and forth at the front of the classroom

your eyes skim over your scribbled words as you try to relocate your place

…

ah!

here we are

“-ant, seokjin, through all transcripts along with the custody record. fourthly, we move on to assessing the reports that have been produced by the forensic experts-”

another balled-up piece of paper hits your foot and your head immediately snaps upwards from your book before you twist around to face the room

“would you cut that out, please?” you snap, already feeling your blood pressure starting to rise from a single glance at taehyung’s smug face

“what? i didn’t know how else to get your attention!” he hums, his arm dangling in the air with a floppy wrist, “my arm’s been up for the past three minutes, and you would’ve known that if you didn’t have your nose buried deep in your book.”

the reminder that you wouldn’t last a day in prison keeps you from lunging forward to wrap your hands around taehyung’s neck and you press your lips together to stop yourself from saying anything too crass

the last thing you need is for some professor to walk past the classroom while you’re cussing up a storm

your self-control has really been put to the test ever since you met taehyung

after all this time, you still don’t know what the guy’s deal is

he’s been a pain in your ass since day one

and for what??

for WHAT?!

at first you just thought that being a complete prick was just his weird version of being charismatic, but then you realised that he wasn’t being charming at all and he was really, truly, genuinely being a straight-up asshole

and, for the record, you’ve tried several times in the past to try to make things better but nothing’s worked

you said that he looked nice in his suit = he told you to stop looking at him like a piece of meat

you asked him how he did on the midterm exam = he told you that it was his right to keep that piece of information private and that you were being a snake by even asking about it

you said happy birthday to him = he said, and you quote, “yeah. it was until you got here.”

the point is, you’ve waved many white flags of surrender and extended many, many olive branches to no avail

at this point you’re pretty sure taehyung just gets off on being a jerk to you

and it’s not fair because it’s literally just you that he picks on constantly

at first you thought that maybe he was just threatened by your presence because you made it pretty clear from day one that you weren’t here to play around

powerful women are intimidating!

you totally get it.

…but then you overheard him offering rosé some studying tips and you even saw him help wendy carry her books for her and everyone knows that rosé and wendy are two of the smartest girls in the class, so why wasn’t he threatened by them?

...

the point is, he doesn’t treat anyone else in the class like this except for you and you can’t seem to figure out why!

what makes it even more frustrating is the fact that his stupid face is very nice to look at, so whenever he’s being mean to you, your dumb girl hormones drown out the sound of his rich, honey-like voice and place floating pink hearts around his head instead

“i’m so sorry i wasn’t paying attention to you, mr. kim.” you force out before gesturing to the notebook cradled in the crook of your arm, “see, all my notes are in here and i’m just trying to make sure that i don’t miss out on any details,” you point out, “and… i thought i said to save your questions for the end, did i not?”

“did you? i guess i wasn’t listening. sorry, sweetheart.” taehyung chirps, folding his arms and leaning forward on his desk, “anyway- don’t you think it’s a little unfair that you get to play the hotshot lawyer in this simulation?”

“everyone gets a turn to be the lawyer - last week, it was jungkook. this week, it’s me. everyone gets a shot to play the hotshot lawyer because our roles rotate.” you shake your head in disagreement, “how am i being unfair?”

“you assigned yourself, like, the coolest case study.” taehyung scoffs, leaning back against his seat and crossing his arms, “i mean… medical negligence and a criminal prosecution for gross negligence manslaughter?” his left brow arches before he turns his head slightly, “jungkook, what was your case study on again?”

“my client parked in a no-parking zone!” jungkook beams, nodding to himself, “i didn’t mind getting that case, though. it was actually pretty fu-”

“you hear that, y/n?” taehyung turns his head back to face you before gesturing behind him, “jungkook also thinks his case was boring as hell- his client parked in a no-parking zone and you get to deal with corrupt doctors and accidentally-but-not-really-accidentally-run-over-by-a-car pedestrians.”

your jaw clenches in frustration and you resist the urge to take a heel off and bash taehyung’s skull in with it

being forced to wear nice shoes to school would be so much better if you were allowed to commit cold-blooded murder with them

“well, that was last week’s case, so even if jungkook thought it was boring…” you pause, turning to set your notebook down on the front desk before twisting back around, “he’s already had his turn. and now it’s my turn!”

“you could’ve given me this case.”

“oh, please.” you snort, rolling your eyes before leaning against the front desk, “you wouldn’t have been able to handle a case this big. this has my name written all over it.”

taehyung scoffs, rolling his eyes, “the only reason why it has your name written all over it was because you grabbed it with your grubby little raccoon hands before anyone else had the chance to-”

“i-!” you pinch the bridge of your nose before letting out a laugh of disbelief, “oh my god, i refuse to have this conversation with you again, taehyung- for the last time, it was a first-come-first-serve situation, and you probably could’ve gotten this case if you weren’t so busy watching netflix in class-”

“you guys-” namjoon clears his throat, his shoulders drooping when the two of you ignore him, “…never mind.”

this always happens

you guys somehow always find something to argue about no matter what

in fact, namjoon’s convinced that you guys could sit in complete and utter silence and still find something to fight over

“how long do you think the argument will last this time?” yoongi leans over, “i bet you ten bucks it’ll last longer than last week’s fight.”

“no way! last week’s fight was half an hour long-” hoseok chimes in, “…they can’t possibly argue for longer than thirty minutes… can they?”

“remember that time they fought over a sandwich?” jungkook sighs, leaning his cheek against his fist, “that was a forty minute argument.”

“they fought over a sandwich?” jimin frowns, turning to glance towards the front, “what was there to even argue about??”

“y/n said that the spread was dijon mustard and taehyung said it was horseradish mustard,” seokjin purses his lips, “…i actually ordered the same sandwich and i’m pretty sure it was just regular ol’ yellow mustard… but i’m too afraid to tell either of them they’re wrong about it.”

“oh my god-” jimin scoffs, “forty minutes arguing about mustard?? really??”

“yep! i even recorded the whole thing just because it’s actually pretty interesting listening to two people scream about mustard so passionately for so long,” jungkook pulls his phone out of his back pocket, the rest of the boys scooting in closer to his desk, “by the time we finish watching the video, they’ll… probably be done arguing with each other. maybe.”

“-ow thick is your skull, taehyung? were you dropped on your head as a baby??” you scowl, “if i was a teacher’s pet like you say i am, then i would’ve sweet-talked my way out of being in a group with you. also, you know what? i wasn’t going to bring this up, but the only reason why we’re here during christmas break is because it was your idea to practice during the holidays-”

“yeah! you get to practice your big show in a huge, empty classroom without getting nervous about someone overhearing you practice speaking in your dumb, professional lawyer voice-” taehyung gestures around at the spacious atmosphere, “if this is your way of being thankful to me, you have an awfully funny way of showing it-”

“do you know what i could be doing right now if i wasn’t here?” you scowl, placing your hands on your hips as you glare at taehyung

“hm, let me think…” he hums, leaning back against his chair before kicking his legs up onto his desk, “bending over and trying desperately to pull the fat stick out of your ass?”

jimin sits up a little straighter as he peers over the top of namjoon and seokjin’s heads to check and see if you and taehyung are done arguing yet

your ears are turning red and there’s an animalistic, frenzied look behind your eyes, so... nope. definitely not done yet.

after all this time, he still doesn’t know why you guys fight the way that you do

it’s like you enjoy pushing each other’s buttons and irritating each other until one of you inevitably snaps (you’re usually the first one to fall off the rocker because taehyung is alarmingly good at being irritating)

“ooh, hold on-” jungkook grins, pointing to the screen before whacking jimin’s arm in rapid smacks, “my favourite part is coming up, you have to pay attention-”

jimin looks away from you two and back down at the screen

“-the low acidity liquid gives dijon mustard that intensified heat and the classic pungent flavour which is very obvious in this sandwich!” you exclaim, peeling the top slice of bread off to reveal the inside, “and look at that colour! that is literally dijon mustard-”

“okay, fine! it’s dijon mustard.” taehyung responds while inspecting his nail beds

“no, you’re not listening to- wait… did you just agree with me?”

“yeah!” he sighs, crossing his arms, “the mustard used in your sandwich is dijon mustard. and also, the sky is green-”

“oh my god, you piece of-!”

jimin looks up again when he hears your voice rise a couple of octaves

this is the part of the argument when your ‘i’m-fine-don’t-touch-me-I’M-FINE’ voice comes out

“wow! you are-” you laugh, shaking your head as you lean down and place your hands flat on the surface of taehyung’s desk “you really are something else, kim taehyung. i-!”

you let out a yelp of surprise when taehyung suddenly reaches over and yanks at a section of your hair

“ow!” you whack his hand away before flicking your hair over your shoulder, “wha- what the hell was that for?!”

taehyung doesn’t flinch at your aggressive tone and he looks up at you, completely unfazed, before giving a half-hearted shrug

“it was hanging, like, right in front of me. i couldn’t not pull on it.”

“well, your tie is right there but you don’t see me reaching over and pulling on it to strangle you because it’s right in front of me-”

“oh, threatening to choke me, are we?” taehyung hums, “i’m suddenly feeling very unsafe. should i get one of the guys to call campus security for my protection, miss y/n?”

“do you guys think we should break things off?” seokjin glances over his shoulder at the escalating scene, “ideally, i’d like for this to not turn into a how to get away with murder scenario…”

jimin narrows his eyes slightly as the gears click-click-click away in his head, leaning back against his seat and reaching up to tap at his chin

there’s something about this situation that’s reminding him of something but he can’t quite put his finger on it

“oh my god, you are such a child-!”

jimin’s eyes suddenly widen in realization, a lightbulb appearing at the top of his head

!

does taehyung like y/n?

...

oh, wow

taehyung has a full-blown crush on you!

how could he not have noticed this before?!

taehyung is literally the bratty little boy pulling on your pigtails because he doesn’t know how else to get your attention on this playground!

a comment from a former conversation with you briefly flits through jimin’s mind as he continues staring at the two of you in awe

he doesn’t remember how exactly you guys started talking about it, but he does remember you saying these words to him:

“i mean… yeah. of course i think taehyung’s attractive. maybe in another universe where he’s not bullying me 24/7, i would be more open to admitting to myself that i might have a slight crush- i-i mean, i- what did we say we were going to get for lunch today?? sandwiches?? we should get sandwiches, the place is right here-”

how could he have forgotten you said that to him?!

it’s like he finally has his hands on the missing puzzle piece... and it’s up to him to finish this puzzle!

“i have a plan.” jimin whispers to himself before reaching over to grab onto jungkook’s wrist, “i know what i have to do!”

“huh?” jungkook frowns in confusion, pausing the video before looking over at him, “what are you talking about?”

“just-” jimin gets up from his seat quickly, the chair screeching against the floor, “just make sure they don’t stop arguing with each other while i’m gone because i might take a while to find what i need-”

“you know, i don’t think that’s going to be an issue,” yoongi snorts, everyone looking towards the front to see you glaring at taehyung like you want to rip his heart out of his chest and eat it raw, “check out that throbbing vein in y/n’s forehead.”

“forget about her forehead vein-” jungkook shakes his head, “has no one else noticed how tightly taehyung clenches his asscheeks whenever he’s pissed? those trousers do not hide anything.”

everyone’s eyes immediately gravitate down to taehyung’s ass, hoseok and seokjin bursting into giggles at the sight

“what the fuck is your problem?!” you scream, taehyung’s eyes widening at your sudden outburst, “you’ve treated me like shit from day one and i’ve literally done nothing wrong!”

“okay! i think we should all just take a step back and take a deep breath…” namjoon gets up from his seat slowly, “it’s getting a little intense-“

“nothing wrong?! oh yeah, because you’re little miss perfect-” taehyung spits out, “don’t play dumb, you know exactly what you did!”

“what did i-!” you throw your hands up into the air, “please, i am begging you to tell me what the horrible thing is that i did that made you decide i was public enemy number one-”

“i heard you talking shit about me at the very beginning of the semester when you didn’t even know me! we’d never met and you didn’t even bother trying to get to know me before you formed your own opinion of me based on the way i looked-” taehyung snaps, “you said that i looked like an entitled, obnoxious frat-boy who didn’t even know left from right and only made it to law school because his daddy gave the school a generous donation- so if we’re really going to talk about who the real asshole is in this room, i would suggest re-evaluating-”

you feel the blood drain from your face at the reminder of what you said about taehyung on the first day of class

...oh.

...

okay, yeah, you... might have said that stuff, but it was only because the other people you were sitting with at the time said stuff like that and... and you were so desperate to find a group of cool law-school friends that you were totally willing to say and do anything they wanted you to do or say!

it obviously didn’t work because you don’t sit with them anymore, so...

yeah, it was a bad move to talk shit about taehyung like that without even having spoken one word to him, but if this proves anything... it’s that peer pressure is dangerous!

“well, why didn’t you just-” you stammer, feeling your face starting to heat up from embarrassment, “why didn’t you just tell me about this earlier? we could’ve nipped it right in the bud-”

“i much prefer the bullying because the feeling i get after seeing the defeat in your eyes is equivalent to a full-body orgasm-”

“oh my god, you sick freak-”

“uh, you guys-” namjoon cuts in again, holding his finger up, “can i just s-”

“okay, fine!” you raise your hands in surrender, “i’m sorry, alright? i’m really sorry. what i said about you was shitty, but i don’t see how bullying me for months on end was a good solution-”

“can you two shut u-”

“oh, i never said it was a good solution, y/n,” taehyung purses his lips, “like i said - i just did it because it was fun-”

“guys, if i could just get one word in-”

“do you even realize how psychotic you sound right no-”

“HEY!” namjoon suddenly bellows, you and taehyung jumping and clamming up immediately in alarm

“what??” the two of you ask at the same time, pausing to glare at each other for a split second before looking back over at namjoon

“i…” he trails off, his eyes flickering upwards, “…know this is kind of awkward timing, but…”

you and taehyung look up simultaneously, your eyes widening to see a dinky little shrub of... mistletoe? taped at the end of a meter stick

oh no 

oh hell no

“kiss first, and then you can apologise for what was obviously a huge misunderstanding and you can apologise for being a huge prick later - pucker up, lovebirds!” jimin chirps, waving the stick a little and watching your eyes go side to side like a ping-pong ball, “don’t be shy! also, i know the mistletoe looks like a clump of grass that i tied a red ribbon around- just don’t look too closely at it-”

“ha!” you let out a laugh before shaking your head quickly, “no way! i don’t know what you people think is going on here, but it’s certainly not that- you can’t just dangle a plant over my head and force me to kiss him-”

“what’s that supposed to mean?” taehyung scoffs in offence, tilting his head upwards slightly, “anyone would be honoured to be under the mistletoe with me!”

“yeah. anyone out of their mind.”

“aw, c’mon, you guys…” hoseok pushes his bottom lip out in a pout before clasping his hands together, “kiss and make up! we all know that’s how it works. let the christmas spirit take over your bodies and fuel your weird hate-love for each othe-”

“the sooner you two kiss and make out, the sooner i can get the hell out of here,” yoongi interrupts, snapping his fingers, “c’mon! plant a fat one on each other!”

“the only reason why y/n’s getting whiney about it because she knows she’ll fall in love with me the moment she kisses me.” taehyung suddenly speaks up and you immediately look back down at him with a glare

fall in love????

with him????

it’s not going to take a single kiss to fall in love with taehyung - it’s going to take intensive exposure therapy to fall in love with him!

“don’t flatter yourself. i would rather throw myself into oncoming traffic than kiss you, kim taehyung.” you growl, smacking your hands down on taehyung’s desk so violently that it rattles beneath you

“now, now. there’s no need to lie…” taehyung chuckles lightly as he pushes his seat back slightly and rises to his feet

“i’m not lying! i don’t want to kiss you!”

“do too!”

“do not!”

“do TOO!”

“do NOT!”

“you know, you just sound like you’re trying to convince yourself that you don’t want to kiss me-”

“you’re the one who keeps pushing it-” you jab a finger into his chest, “maybe you’re the one who wants to kiss me!”

“you think i wanna kiss you?!” taehyung laughs, flicking your hand away from him, “now look who the delusional one is!”

“i thought this was supposed to fix the arguing?” seokjin mutters under his breath, jungkook offering him a shrug while keeping his eyes glued on you and taehyung

he was running out of things to watch on netflix and this makes far better entertainment

the only thing that would make this better was if you and taehyung had at it in a grimy boxing ring half-naked

“i can’t be the only one thinking that all of this could be easily fixed if they just boned each other.” jungkook snorts, the other boys turning to look at him, “…what??”

“i wouldn’t kiss you even if you were the last man on earth.” you snarl, your voice wavering slightly

“you really expect me to believe that?” taehyung tilts his head, “don’t think i didn’t catch the way your eyes just flickered down to my lips, y/n...”

you feel your heart starting to pound in your chest when he places his hands flat on the desk as well, the tips of his fingers brushing over yours

at this proximity, the little voice in the back of your head can’t help but point out how pretty taehyung’s eyes are... and how nice he smells... and how soft his lips look...

...do you wanna kiss him?

oh, god

do you wanna kiss kim taehyung?!

no, you don’t

yes, you do

what??

WHAT?? 

“you wanna kiss me so bad, and you know it, y/l/n.” taehyung taunts, leaning forward just a little more

at this point, your faces are merely an inch away from each other’s and it wouldn’t take much effort to just lean in and… you know.

“i hate you.”

“if you hated me so much, then you wouldn’t be making such a big deal over silly little mistletoe now, would you?” taehyung smirks, pulling away before making his way around the desk so that he can get closer to you, “you like me but you’re too much of a wimp to admit it!”

“i like you?!” you gawk, “more like you like me!”

“okay-” jimin huffs, lowering the stick before taking a step back, “i really thought this was going to work, but my arms are getting tired, so if you two aren’t going to kiss, then i- oh-” his eyes widen in surprise when you and taehyung are suddenly lunging at each other not a second later, your hands cupping his cheeks and his hands gripping your waist as you kiss far more feverishly than he thought you two would

oh

oh my

“see, what’d i say? sexual tension!” jungkook kisses his teeth, leaning back against his chair and crossing his arms, “all that pent-up energy from arguing has led to this beautiful moment-”

“you’re an- mm- you’re an awful kisser, by the way-” taehyung mutters against your mouth, lips turning up in a boyish grin when you retaliate by shoving at his chest

“so are you!” you pull away only for taehyung to pull you right back in to press his mouth against yours again, “’m hating ehvery minute of this-”

“ah… isn’t young love sweet?” hoseok coos, jumping in his seat when taehyung suddenly shoves you up against the front desk with a thud, “so passionate!”

“okay, we’re just going to-” namjoon gets up from his seat gesturing for the boys to get up as well, “we’re happy to see that the argument has been settled!”

he hurries everyone to the front door and turns to glance over his shoulder, “when you guys are done, just… let us know! we’re going to pop over to starbucks for some hot chocolate. so... text one of us. or call! or you could use snapchat- it’s up to you, really-!”

namjoon doesn’t get a chance to say anything else before yoongi’s yanking his arm and pulling him backwards, reaching over to slam the door shut

a moment of silence goes by in which everyone takes a second to process what exactly just happened

“take your shirt off-”

“you take yours off first!”

“i... can’t tell if my plan was a success or a failure.” jimin mutters to himself, reaching up to scratch the back of his neck

“hey, if it makes you feel any better, at least they aren’t arguing with each other anymore!” jungkook cheers, clapping his hands quietly, “it’s a christmas miracle!”

❄️christmas with cee 2020 masterlist 🎄

[amjustagirl]

CHAPTER 2 - FALLEN

Fic Summary:

The sky Oikawa Tooru’s heart seeks is a world away from the earth yours is buried in. You are a fool to trust him with your heart anyway.

Where Oikawa Tooru tries to recapture your heart. 

Chapter 1 // Chapter 2 // Chapter 3

Pairing: Oikawa Tooru x fem! reader

Genre / Wordcount : Angst (7k words), cameo from MSBY 4

Warnings: One non-explicit bedroom scene.

Masterlist link here!

Tag list link here!

You catch sight of Oikawa Tooru as you bustle through the hospital’s sliding doors, your usual cup of coffee in your hand that you buy on the way to work. He’s seated in the waiting area next to a middle aged man you guess must be his manager, from the way he jumps to his feet immediately to act as a human shield as you call out breathlessly - 

“T - Oikawa? What are you doing here?” 

Tooru’s head swivels around to meet your gaze, and you’re shocked by the lifelessness in his eyes until you glance at the bandages wrapped around his swollen knee. 

Oh. 

You try not to stare, but you do so anyway. The sight of your ex-boyfriend makes you feel as if you’re seeing a ghost, a specter from some past life. You last saw him when he was twenty one, young and proud, wax wings fully spread, a speck in the skies. What a difference five years makes. His shoulders are still broad, and the tilt of his jaw is still proud, but the light in his eyes has faded to darkness, and the pallor of his skin suggests far too much time spent away from the sun. 

Icarus, Icarus. Your hubris has led you to such heights, but look how far you’ve fallen. 

It’s surprising there’s no news of his injury, considering he’s one third of Japan’s trifecta of setters in the volleyball scene’s monster generation. With the Olympics rapidly approaching with just over a year to go, an injury must be devastating, especially to Oikawa Tooru, with dreams of Olympic greatness and victory on his native shores. 

A nurse materialises to usher Oikawa away for surgery before he can respond to the pity in your gaze. You look around. He’s alone, save for his manager. No one deserves to be wake up alone after surgery, so you call after him - 

“I’ll check in on you after you’re done! Gambatte!”

He responds with a thumbs up and a weak smile. 

You flip through his medical files once you get the chance. 

Oikawa Tooru, twenty six. Pro-volleyball player for EJP Raijin previously, currently playing in the Argentinian league. Narrowly missed out on making the cut for the previous Olympics, but went on to represent Japan in the last three World Cups, alternating with Miya Atsumu and Kageyama Tobio. Obviously hoping for another shot at the Olympics, but that’s looking bleak from what you’re gleaning from his medical records. 

His right knee has always bothered him, even during his high school days. Now, a decade later, it looks like he’s managed to tear his tendon to shreds. 

Volleyball is a cruel, demanding mistress, especially for one not born a genius. 

The surgery to repair a torn knee ligament is delicate work, requiring an experienced surgeon, and the road to recovery requires extensive physiotherapy. It’s no wonder he’s resorted to the modern Tokyo hospital you work in rather than returning to his native Sendai to recuperate. The downside of doing so though, is that he’d have to recover alone. 

You wrinkle your nose. He may be your ex-boyfriend, but he doesn’t deserve that. 

The sun is setting when you finally find the time to slip into his room. 

As expected, he’s still asleep. The anesthetic will take some time to wear off. From the looks of the surgeon’s notes, the surgery was a success - though you know from the nature and extent of the injury that his road to recovery will be long and winding.   

So you seat yourself in the visitor’s chair with a hot cup of tea and an onigiri to stave off your hunger at not finding time for a break any earlier. You had an awful day at work today, two of your patients puked on you, another tried to fight you when you drew his blood, and the senior registrar in the ward assigned you a mountain of paperwork that you only just managed to complete, so you give in to sleep yourself as exhaustion settles into your bones.

“Princess?”  

You snap awake at the familiar nickname, ignoring the flush working its way up the back of your neck as you leap to his bedside to check his vitals, only relaxing when you’re satisfied everything’s fine. 

“You’re just waking up after a surgery, Oikawa”. When his forehead crinkles in confusion at the sound of his surname, you correct yourself. “I mean - Tooru”. The corners of his cracked lips tilt up in satisfaction. 

“Will you stay with me?” Tooru murmurs, eyelids beginning to droop again. 

You smile fondly despite yourself. “Do you want me to?” you ask. 

He manages to pout even as he’s falling back asleep. “I asked, didn’t I?” 

You smooth his hair from his forehead, slotting your hand into his. “Fine, fine. Go to bed, sleeping beauty”. 

He huffs an amused breath from his nose before he closes his eyes, contented. Trust Tooru to be shameless enough to cling on to his ex-girlfriend without a shred of awkwardness. You end up staying in his room for hours, watching him sleep.

The heart that you’ve locked away behind bars of bone and steel twitches, just once. 

You frown when the nurse catches your sleeve. “A patient’s looking for you” she says, just as you’re about to go off on a short break. 

“Who?” you reply, wondering whether it’s Sato-san who vomited this morning, or Imai-san whose blood pressure niggles at your mind. You do not expect the nurse to flush pink as she replies - “Oikawa-san”, describing the sweet young man with lovely brown eyes and such a charming voice. 

You slip back into his room when your shift ends. You expect to see a shadow of a man with broken wings, and you do catch a fleeting glimpse of Tooru staring wistfully out of the window, face tilted towards the sun before he turns to you with a wide smile and a pleased - “you came!”  

This is the Oikawa Tooru you are accustomed to dealing with. “Stop flirting with the nurses”, you tell him briskly, bustling over to look at his files. “They have jobs to do, don’t use them to carry messages to me.”

“But I’m boredddd.”

“I’m sure you have volleyball videos to watch.”

“I watched them all day today. ‘Sides, I watched all the matches on today already, twice – and I have plenty of time to watch them a third time. I have plenty of time to catch up with you, I haven’t seen you in so long!”

Five years since you broke up to be exact, but you sidestep that fact neatly, pouring over his medical file instead. His doctors’ notes indicate his recovery is promising. He brightens up when you tell him so, playfully complaining that hospital food is shit in a thinly veiled attempt to steal your food, a habit he’s clearly not outgrown. But you’re not all that hungry anyway, so you split your pork bun in half and hand it to him, dropping into the visitor’s chair. 

“So how’re you feeling?” 

“Like shit. My knee hurts so muchhhh.” 

You shrug, careless. “That’s pretty expected, to be honest.”

“Hmph. I thought they’d have taught you some bedside manners in medical school”, he snipes, though the effect is rather lost when his cheeks are comically round and full of food. 

You laugh, the stress from your day lifting from your shoulders.  

“I seem to forget them when it’s you.”

“So mean”, he pouts, hiding the familiar gleam in his eye that appears whenever he’s trying to analyse his opponents, take them apart. “As punishment, tell me about yourself. What have you been up to these days?” 

You decide to treat him like any old friend, giving him the condensed run down of your professional life,  how you’ve graduated from medical school (with top marks I bet, he interjects), how you chose to stay in Tokyo instead of returning to Sendai (your parents must miss you he says, and you brush him off with an airy they have other children, they’ll survive), how you chose to work in this hospital because you’re considering a specialisation in Orthopedic surgery (because of your grandma, I bet, he says, and you choose not to correct that, using your silence as a lie).  

He in turn tells you about the highlights of his career, how he’s spent a year at EJP Raijin before he was headhunted to the Argentinian league, how he spent four years overseas save for summers back in Japan to train with the national team, how he’s hopeful, even now, of recovering and fighting for his spot on the Olympic roster next year. 

You already knew all of that from news alerts on your phone you never forced yourself to delete, diverting him instead with a question about life in Argentina, nodding as he reminisces about his apartment in San Juan where he gets to watch the sun set over the Andes mountains, the kitchen that he stuffed full of Japanese groceries like daishi and mirin and sake and miso in his first year there just so he has a tangible reminder of home. 

You stop yourself from wondering whether he thinks about the little home he shared with you with such fondness. That time has passed. 

His voice wavers as he spins you stories about his teammates - Matteo, whose family owns a vineyard and taught him to appreciate wine like a proper Argentinian, Miguel, who makes the best empanadas and gets roaring drunk every time they win a match, Gabriel, who takes him to his family’s home in the mountains every other weekend because his grandmother is convinced that a single young man without family in the city will starve if he’s left to his own devices. 

It seems his wings were durable enough for him to soar across the oceans, his grit and determination the foundation of the new life he’s built, whole continents away. 

“It’s funny how the world works”, you remark off hand. “I never expected to see you again.”

His eyes gleam again. “The universe seems to work in funny ways.” 

You start spending breaks in his room, scarfing down your lunch and dinner while he talks your ear off about the horrible sitcoms or ridiculous game shows he’s watched today. You catch him watching a video of Kageyama’s serves and you’re amused when he practically hisses when you comment idly that his kouhai has certainly improved since his high school days. 

You ignore his spluttered protests that service records aren’t everything and besides, his own spike serves have definitely won Japan a game or two last year until, with the air of a boy king, he commands you to sit next to him on the hospital bed so he can pull up a compilation of his serves and his best moments. 

Years might have passed, but you’re still hopeless at refusing him. Besides, isn’t it better that you distract him from the sorry state of his knee? So you do as he says, ignoring the faint flutter of your traitorous heart as he leans into your side. 

“See? I told you my spike serves are amazing?”

“Yes, yes. I already knew that. I watched so many of your practices in university, remember?”

He looks at you strangely. “Did you?” he asks, leaning his head on his hand, eyes boring into yours. 

You think of evenings spent sitting on the bleachers, homework in your lap as you watch as the boy you love builds the strength in his wax wings in preparation for his eventual flight. “Yes”, you admit, sheets rustling as you shift away from him, avoiding his perplexed frown. “You were probably too focused on practice to notice.”

You already know you shouldn’t spend so much time in his room, but you’ve spent most of your life doing what you should instead of what you want to so just this once, you ignore rational thought in favour of sentiment.

After all, he’ll be discharged from hospital in a week, then you’ll never see him again. 

Tooru promptly proves you wrong the day before he’s scheduled to be discharged. 

“I need someone to help me move into my apartment.”

“Hire a mover”, you tell him. You don’t even look up from your notes. 

“Already did”, he chirps, undaunted by your apparent disinterest. “But it’d be nice to have a friend who I know will be nice enough to help poor old crippled me put my stuff away.” Then he grins cheekily, “plus I checked with that pretty nurse – Yuna-san was it? Anyway, she told me you’re off tomorrow, so you might as well spend the day with me.”

There goes your excuse to wriggle out of having to spend your rare day off with your ex. 

“I have a mountain of sleep debt to pay off”, you protest, but faced with wide brown eyes and an embarrassing wobble of his lip, you comply. Still, you manage to get the promise of a free dinner out of him, so you suppose it’ll do.

Tooru doesn’t have much to unpack, a couple of cardboard boxes of clothes and books, probably because most of his belongings are still in Argentina. He laughs and raises his hands in an attempt to placate you when you lift an eyebrow, first at the lack of kitchen equipment in his furnished apartment, second at the weights and volleyball he tries to smuggle in behind your back. 

“You’re not supposed to exercise for at least a month or two”, you cluck your tongue, sighing with disapproval at the furtive look he casts at the volleyball sitting at the corner of his living room.

“I can set while sitting on a stool! Don’t scold me, my heart can’t bear it”. He throws a hand across his face, brow creased dramatically. 

Icarus, Icarus. You’ve already fallen once. Will you seek out the sun again? 

A string of familiarity loops into a knot over your heart. If you close your eyes and count to ten, you can imagine that you’re eighteen again, chiding the boy you love for practicing too hard. But you’re twenty six now, a full fledged adult who should know better than to dabble in sentiment again (especially when it comes to brown eyed boys who only dream of the sun), so you slash through the threads connecting you to him with a flash of your teeth, bury your beating heart deeper into the dungeon you’ve built years ago of white bone and solid steel.  

“Do what you want, but your neighbours will hate you if you keep thumping that damn ball against the wall.” You say, simply, dismissively. 

“No one could ever hate me”, he declares with bravado. “I’ll charm them all with my charm and good looks.”

“Ridiculous”, you huff, dumping the last of his clothing into the cupboard. “Where’s the dinner you promised? I want ramen and gyoza at least.”

“So demanding”, he lilts. “I’ll order in. Tonkatsu ramen with char siu, bamboo shoots, extra spring onions with gyoza on the side?” 

Your heart struggles against its shackles. He still remembers your order.  

“Yes”, you finally say. “You got that right.”

He grins at you cheekily, as if to say of course. 

After you gulp down your ramen, devour your gyozas, you pack up, ready to leave. You have an early shift tomorrow, and you’re already dreaming about your soft bed whilst dreading the cup of coffee you’ll have to down tomorrow morning just to stay awake. 

He catches your wrist, presses the spare key to the apartment into your hand.  “Come back. I want to see you again”, he says, an order and not a plea. 

You are about to make up an excuse, tell him anything but the truth that you suspect it’s bad for your heart to keep seeing him again. 

“Please” - he adds with a tint of fragility to his voice. 

“I’ll be back when I can”, you finally say. 

“Tomorrow?” he looks up at you with hopeful eyes. 

“We’ll see”, you pry your hand loose from his grasp, slip out the front door. 

You stay away for two days, citing your work schedule as an excuse until he wears you down with a barrage of cutesy line stickers aimed at driving home how lonely he is and how much he misses your presence. You’re being dramatic as usual, you text him dryly, but you turn up anyway at his apartment on a Friday night, letting yourself in with an armful of reports and a bucket of oden. 

“How’re you doing? Are you listening to your physiotherapist? Eating properly? Sleeping well?”

“You sound like my mother”, he grouses, rolling his wheelchair to the dining table. 

You flick at his forehead, he slumps back in his wheelchair.  “Stop bullying the cripple’, he wheezes through his chortle. 

“You deserve it”, you retort. “Don’t run away from the question. How’re you feeling?”

“It still hurts”, he admits with a mock sniff. “It should stop hurting by nowwww.”

You push your glasses up the bridge of your nose. “That’s to be expected. Your sinews just got stitched together two weeks ago. Not sure why you’d expect any less.”

“Bah, rude. At least you didn’t say I told you so”, he grumbles, spooning oden into his mouth. “That would be insufferable.”

“Well, maybe you’ll listen to me now that I’m actually a doctor”, you inform him pertly, batting away memories of a teenage boy with hazel eyes shouting indignantly at you after practice in the Seijoh gym.

Tooru snorts. “I can’t believe my eighteen year old self was dumb enough to open my future self up to a jab like that”, he complains, chewing on a cabbage roll grumpily. 

“We’re all dumb at eighteen”, you remark. “You’re no exception.” 

“You were dumb enough to date me”, he teases with a mocking smile.  

Your spoon slips from your hand momentarily. It’s the first time he’s alluded to your past relationship. 

“I was, wasn’t I”, you say lightly, before turning the conversation to Tooru’s physiotherapy sessions. 

You have no wish to delve back into the past, but you’re willing to be his friend since he seems to need one for now.  

Tooru’s knee recovers enough for him to shift from his wheelchair to crutches, which he points at you playfully, mimicking a gun every time you pop by for a visit. He seems to plan his physiotherapy session around your schedule, just so he can wheedle you into paying him yet another visit when your shift at the hospital end, bribing you with a cup of coffee with a hint of chocolate from the café across the street that you’ve never found the time to visit. 

“Thank you, kind sir”, you say, accepting the coffee with a laugh. 

“You’re welcome, my lady”, he answers with a smirk, motioning you to follow him for yet another evening to be spent in his home sitting across him, red ink smeared on your hands as you mark up the reports in your lap. 

His façade that he’s coping with his injury just fine slips every so often. You catch him more often than not watching compilation videos of Kageyama and Atsumu at the World Cup this year with a strained expression on his face, or resting his chin on the windowsill whilst staring wistfully at the birds in the sky. 

He does not confide about his worries to you. You’re not sure you want him to. 

But you can’t explain to yourself the impulse to purchase a bird feeder for his balcony, nor the glow-in-the-dark poster of the constellations that you cart into his bedroom until your heart has to scramble for equilibrium when he thanks you, his smile soft. 

“In exchange for all the coffee you’ve bought me”, you reply, turning away to hide all evidence of your heart’s betrayal, the diffusion of blood in your cheeks.  

A month passes. Then another. 

The crutches get kept in the storeroom. A limp remains, but the degree which his knee can bend increases by the day. His mood improves even further, and you constantly find yourself swerving to avoid his affectionate gazes, his attempts at flirtation. 

“You’re looking so pretty today!” he lilts, fitting his arm snugly into the crook of your elbow as you walk down the neon lit streets of Tokyo. He insisted on this outing, and in the custom of your rekindled friendship, managed to convince you to accompany him on your off day so he can get crepes from Harajuku notwithstanding the fact that it takes forty five minutes on the train and his knee still acts up from time to time.  

“It’s my first time downtown in a month”, you tell him. “Of course I’m going to dress up.” You don’t tell him you spent far too long in front of your closet, tossing outfits on your bed until you found one that complements you just right. 

He buys you trinkets, hair accessories that you’ll never wear, tries to win you ridiculous stuffed toys from the claw machine. 

“You’re wasting money”, you scold, wiping the whipped cream from his mouth. 

“It’s not a waste if it’s for you”, he tells you, with startling sincerity that you still doubt.

He doesn’t mean it, you tell yourself. It’s just Tooru being Tooru. 

You refuse to admit what’s staring you in the face until you have to duck your head to avoid his attempt at pressing his lips to your cheek. 

“Goodnight, Tooru”, you manage to say before you bolt off into the night. You check to make sure your heart is still under lock and key. 

It is, but it beats resentfully. Tooru, it beats against its bars with frightening intensity. Tooru. Tooru.  

You ignore it. You know what’s best for it.

You stay away from him for a fortnight, requesting for a change in your schedule without updating him, taking the other exit from the hospital so you don’t have to see him. You stay away until he manages to wear you down yet again, texting you the most ridiculous conspiracy theories about your absence from his life – you must be abducted by aliens, he texts you once, or your mother forced you to marry some stranger, I can break you out if you just say the word. 

He has a guest, you hear another voice, deeper, filled with gravel and intensity, so different from Tooru’s lighter lilt. You do not mean to eavesdrop, but you don’t want to interrupt Tooru when he has a rare guest over, and there’s nowhere else for you wait save for the dusty front step, so you settle yourself in, pen poised to continue your work. 

“What did the doctor say? When are you coming back for practice?” 

“I’m doing good! The physiotherapist thinks I can try light exercise next week. If all goes well, I’ll be back to practice in a month.”

“Sounds promising.”

“I had a good medical team. And I’m actually resting properly!”

“Shittykawa. Stop sounding so proud about doing what’s necessary for your recovery.”

“Iwa-channnn, stop being mean to meeee!”

Ah, Iwaizumi, of course. You haven’t seen him in years, but you remember him from school, a stoic boy with a good heart. You wonder if he’s changed. 

“Are you planning on heading back to Argentina?”

Tooru answers without hesitation. “Of course”, he says airily. “As long as they take me back.”

Your foolish heart shudders with disappointment. Of course. If you run your fingers down his spine, you’ll probably find blooms of wax attached to his very bone. 

You are about to stand up and leave when Tooru speaks up again. 

“But I’m going to enjoy my time in Japan while I’m back. Did I tell you I reconnected with my ex? She’s great, it feels like I never left.”

The firestorm of blood in your ears nearly drowns out Iwaizumi’s growled ‘piece of shit’ (he truly hasn’t changed after all), the clatter of glassware as Tooru protests that he’s not playing with your heart, he truly cares about you, his sullen silence when Iwaizumi demands what’s going to happen when he leaves Japan for Argentina, when he inevitably leaves you behind (yet again).   

Of course. 

You know his heart longs for the sky. There is no space for you. 

You barely have time to react when the door swings open, Iwaizumi on the verge of storming out. You plaster a smile to your face that does not fool him, but you hang on to it nonetheless, cracks appearing only when he gives you a wide eyed look of sympathy that only pours oil onto the flaming war between your brain and your heart. 

“It’s fine”, you say, and though he clearly does not believe you, he bows and leaves anyway. 

Tooru stares at you, mouth open, stumbling over himself with apologies and demands for you to tell him what you’ve overheard, but you motion for him to just stop with your hand, wave aside his protest that he means what he said, he truly likes you.  

Your heart screeches in delight, but your mind is firmly in the driver’s seat. 

“Let’s just pretend I never heard you say that, and we can continue just as before.”

“As friends?” he says, twisting his lips as if the words taste sour in his mouth. He clutches at your shoulders.

“I want more. I want you.”

Your heart thrums in agreement, but you recall assembling the remains of your heart back into your chest whilst kneeling on the cold bathroom floor half a decade ago. The span of five years should have molded you to view your shared past with pragmatism, but your heart seems to have forgotten its lesson. You shake your head.

“There’s no way you truly want me. I don’t think you’ve only ever had space in your heart for anything but your goals.” 

Your response emerges more bitter than you intend. 

“That’s not true”, he weakly protests. “I care about you.”

Not enough, you refrain from telling him. “Let’s remain friends”, you do say, and he opens his mouth to object again, but at the hard look you give him, he slumps back with a defeated nod.

He tries to respect your decision, never complaining when you keep a careful arm’s length distance from him, though you can feel his heated gaze on you whenever he thinks you won’t notice, hear his quiet sighs whenever you shy away from any accidental touch. He droops when you turn down his invite for lunch with his family when they come down for a visit, citing work even though he knows you’re off for the day. 

Still, it’s manageable and he says he needs you, so you return for visits, at least twice weekly, offering encouraging smiles and friendly words when he returns first to light exercise, then to rehabilitative practice a month later, just as he predicted. 

He carves out time for dinners with you, taking care to ask about your day, preferring to spin you stories about the pigeons and doves and crows crowding his balcony rather than talking about volleyball or his practice. He insists on escorting you to his apartment after work when you allow him to, offering you his arm with a soft smile that disarms you, dissolves any resistance. 

It’s an uneasy equilibrium, but it’ll suffice. 

The careful balance you’ve maintained in the space between you and Tooru is shattered when you find you’re not the only one who’s decided to pay him a surprise visit on a Friday night. 

“Tooru, ya didn’t say ya got yerself a pretty girl during yer break”, a man with bleach blonde hair wolf whistles appreciatively when you step into the apartment. 

“I’m just a friend”, you reply confusedly before Tooru’s shout “Shove off, Miya” confirms that one Miya Atsumu has decided to invade Tooru’s apartment. Well, him and what seems like half the MSBY team, with Hinata Shoyo, Bokuto Koutaro and Sakusa Kiyoomi squashed uncomfortably on Tooru’s tiny sofa, long legs stretched across the living room. 

It turns out the MSBY team just finished a game in Tokyo, and Hinata dragged his teammates to visit Tooru in a wholesome bid to cheer him up. You try to excuse yourself after exchanging nods with Sakusa (he hasn’t changed much from his university days) when Miya Atsumu blocks your retreat with a drawled invite for Izakaya and the promise of karaoke after. 

Tooru mouths playfully at you don’t leave me alone with these clowns (you’re tempted to point out that he’s very much one himself), and before you can even blink, you find yourself dragged along to the nearest Izakaya, impressed by the amount of food each man polishes off - skewers of chicken hearts and cartilage, bowls of potato salad and rice with braised pork belly, listening to stories of their exploits on the national team together, stumbling into the karaoke bar tipsy from the beers that Miya Atsumu pressed into your hand, head heavy enough to allow him to wind an arm around your waist. 

“She’s too old for you, ‘Tsumu-kun”, Tooru trills, inserting himself in between you and Atsumu, mouth taut with aggravation. 

“I’m not old, just a year older”, you roll your eyes, as the blonde setter backs away, lips turned up in amusement. Tooru is not placated, muttering how the younger setter is a douche and a sleeze bag as he drapes his jacket over you like a blanket. You nestle against his side, head on his shoulder as his arm rests protectively around you. 

Atsumu watches this with raised eyebrows, whistling slowly, opening his mouth to remark that he’s never seen Oikawa so smitten before when Hinata interrupts with a chirped  “‘Tsum-Tsum, join me!”, handing him a microphone while bouncing on the balls of his feet. 

Karaoke is the most fun you’ve had in ages. Hinata and Bokuto and Atsumu sing all their favourite anime theme songs with gusto - Atsumu even gets misty eyed when he croons Sparkle by Radwimps, reddening when everyone teases him for being a romantic sap, Bokuto shaking his hips to Western pop hits, Hinata showing off his Spanish skills. Sakusa refuses to even touch the microphone but you suppose it’s a win that he’s even in the karaoke booth with all of you. 

Tooru slaps away Atsumu’s attempts at handing you any further alcohol, forcing you to down cups of water until you are no longer glassy eyed, but still tipsy enough to agree to sing ridiculous K-On songs with Hintata and Bokuto, not stopping even when Tooru whips out his phone to video the entire performance with an indulgent smile. 

“Delete it!” you squeal, losing your balance when you try swiping the phone out of his hands, tripping into his lap instead.  

“In your dreams, princess”, Tooru chuckles, his arms snaking around you like a vise. 

“Anndd that’s our cue to call it a night”, Atsumu quips, herding Hinata and Bokuto out onto the street, Sakusa heaving an audible sigh of relief. “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do, kids!” he calls over his shoulder, throwing you a wink. 

“I’m technically his senpai, cheeky brat”, Tooru mutters, the irritation in his voice washing away as you giggle. “C’mon, it’s too late for you to get home and my place is nearer to the hospital so you might as well stay over tonight. You can take the bed, I’ll take the sofa.”

You shake your head, arguing that you couldn’t possibly turn an invalid like him out of his bed but he huffs at the insinuation that he’s anything but well, his knee almost whole again. You give in after he convinces you that it’d be more inconvenient for him to escort you all the way to your own home rather than put you up for the night, and you allow him to loop his arm around yours and lead you back to his apartment. 

It’s not the first time you’ve been in his apartment this late, not by a long shot, but it is the first time you’re over with the intention of staying over. The t-shirt you borrow from Tooru hangs off your frame, the scent of the fabric softener Tooru uses is familiar. You would’ve preferred being tipsier to dull your senses, but alcohol would only impair your logic, allow your heart to prevail, so you try to quell the thrumming of your blood in your veins by curling up on a seat by the window with a cup of tea when Tooru emerges from his shower. 

“Ready for bed?” he asks, towelling off his hair, frowning when you shake your head. “It’s late, you have work tomorrow, even if it’s the afternoon shift.”

“It’s fine”, you say without turning your head to face him. “Go to bed, I’ll take the couch.”

“I’m insulted, princess. What kind of a man d’you think I am to make his guest sleep on the couch? ”

It’s less dangerous to ignore him, so you pay him no mind, choosing instead to lean your chin in your hand and look up towards the night sky. It soothes you, the moon an old friend, reminding of five years’ worth of quiet nights spent in your own flat, filtering your younger self into adulthood. 

“What’re you looking at?” He takes a step forward, kneels down next to you. 

“The moon and the stars”, you say dreamily. “They’re pretty tonight.”

A myriad of weather conditions must coincide to allow the stars to even be visible in the polluted Tokyo night sky, but tonight of all nights fate intervenes, the stars align. The sky is cloudless, the full moon hangs heavy, the stars shimmer and dance.  

“Are they?” Tooru whispers. “I haven’t noticed.”

You finally turn to look at him. “Why’re you staring at me?” 

The unconscious echo of your past - a boy and a girl, falling in love under the same night sky makes his mouth twist wistfully, eyes faded gold.

“Because you are my sun, my moon and my stars. I love you better than anything in the sky.”

Your mouth falls open, your heart suddenly roaring, pounding against its restraints. 

“You can’t mean that”, you whisper. “Don’t say it if you don’t mean it.”

“I do”, he says, with heartbreaking sincerity. “And I always will.”

Nostalgia, aided by the lingering alcohol in your veins opens the gate to your foolish heart. You want to pretend that you are eighteen again, without a care in the world, indulging in the warmth of his hand on the small of your back, the caress of his breath on your cheek. Your lips beckon his, swallowing the catch of his breath when your hands slide under his shirt. 

“Are you sure about this?” His eyes are hungry, almost ravenous, but his hands still hover at the hem of your top. 

“Yes”, you murmur, pressing open mouthed kisses to the column of his neck. “Please, Tooru - please.” 

He carries you into the bedroom, undresses you with shaking hands, chanting your name with reverence, almost a prayer. His eyes darken with desperation and need, unwilling to allow himself any release until you fall apart boneless, caged in his arms.  

“Stay with me”, he murmurs, after you’ve both cleaned up a second time, tugging you into bed. 

It’s laughable. Five years on, Oikawa Tooru still has the power to make your mind lose all reason (however temporarily). With a single heated look, he commands your heart to break willingly in his hands. How could you not have learnt your lesson? The conversation between him and Iwaizumi merely confirms what you’ve known all this while.

(The sky his heart seeks is a world away from the earth yours is buried in)

Even now, you can see the glimmer of golden wax feathers budding along his spine, gleaming under the pale moonlight. 

You lie under the covers until his breath evens out, then you stumble out of bed. You force your heart to relinquish the keys to its freedom, handing it back to logic and rationality, pulling on your clothing, folding your borrowed clothing aside.  

Tooru mumbles your name, his hand outstretched towards you. “Come back”, he says in his sleep, fragility tinting the edges of his words. 

Your fingers miss the doorknob by an inch. You dash your foolish hopes against the darkness of the room, put on your resolve like armour, leave your spare key on the kitchen counter. 

Without looking back, you slip out into the night. 

​

[straykidsupdate]

Stray Kids Are Breaking Records, Breaking Eardrums and Breaking Limits (INTERVIEW)

A Stray Kids track a day keeps the stress away. Though one can argue the K-pop group's energetic brand of "noise music" could possibly heighten tension, their bass-bumping, get-the-crowd-jumping songs are encouraging, vital points to Stray Kids' calling: to be the voices of their generation.

As showcased on their fiery 2019 hip-pop hit "MIROH," or 2020's heavy-hitting "God's Menu," Stray Kids — often abbreviated as SKZ — are unrelenting in their journey of self-expression and their determination to push themselves, and their fans, to their full potential. A prime example? Their second studio album, NOEASY, released Aug. 23.

Source: Pop Crush

The 14-track project, the majority of which was produced by sub-unit 3RACHA (Bang Chan, Changbin and Han), exhibits Stray Kids' ability to bring the noise no matter the tempo. NOEASY starts off strong with five in-your-face tracks that blend EDM and hip-hop elements (lead single "Thunderous," "Cheese," supporting single "Domino," "The View" and "SSICK"), while the later part of the album experiments with different genres and styles, from jazz-pop to rock.

Just three years into their career — they formed in 2018 — members Bang Chan, Lee Know, Changbin, Hyunjin, HAN, Felix, Seungmin and I.N. already carry dozens of award nominations and wins under their belt, and boast chart-topping hits in both physical and digital sales. Even before the release of their second album, the group already set a new record by becoming the first artist under JYP Entertainment to reach 1 million pre-orders.

We recently caught up with the members to talk about NOEASY, the adorable SKZOO version of "Thunderous" and why touring is their first and foremost priority.

Congratulations on your second album! A studio album takes lots of work, so how does it feel to have this out there in the world now?

Changbin: We really put our everything into preparing this album and we're really confident in it, so I’m really happy that STAY can finally listen to it!

Lee Know: We couldn’t wait to put this out because there are so many really, really good songs on it, so it feels great to finally release this album.

Hyunjin: Somehow a year has already passed, and we’re so thankful to our STAY who have waited for us. The entire album is good, so we hope STAY really enjoy it.

NOEASY has already achieved the title of being the best-selling album in JYP Entertainment in history. Any thoughts on that? What other records would you guys like to break?

Bang Chan: That title was achievable all thanks to STAY! If it weren't for STAY, we wouldn’t have been able to have even gotten this far. Stray Kids are known as “the kids that enjoy breaking things." We break objects, break eardrums and break limits, so breaking another record wouldn’t be so bad. Of course, we’ll need the help from STAY!

I.N: I hope we grow even more with the next album, so much so that people will describe us as artists who are constantly improving.

What were your first impressions of the title track?

HAN: When we listened to the final product, it made me really happy that the track sounded really fresh, the lyrics were very witty and full of spirit and it clearly embodied Stray Kids’ distinct color. I wanted to hurry and work on the performance and share the song with someone!

Felix: The song is really unique and I believe that we were the only team to make it impactful.

Seungmin: One day, upon arriving at home, 3RACHA immediately played the song for me. The moment I heard it, it felt electrifying, and I really wanted it to be a title track. That’s why I voiced a lot of my opinion, too.

3RACHA (Bang Chan, Changbin and Han), you guys have made a name for yourself and were heavily involved in this second album just like past releases. What was it like with this project?

Bang Chan: Just like any other project that we’ve worked on, we just had fun. We experimented with a lot of different styles and tried our best to widen our musical spectrum.

Changbin: We knew there would be a lot of expectations as this would be a full album, so we really put a lot of effort into the process.

HAN: The process was a lot of fun. We’d ask ourselves, “What should we attempt? What should we try next?” And we looked forward to what we’d come up with while working on this album.

How was it different this time?

Bang Chan: The “let’s just have fun” part hasn’t changed at all, but the biggest difference would be the genres of music and the ways we recorded the songs.

Changbin: Perhaps because our second full album is the first album we’re releasing after [television competition] Kingdom, there was a bit of pressure to meet people’s expectations. When pondering what everyone would be expecting of us, we thought they’d definitely be looking forward to something new in true Stray Kids’ fashion. I think that’s the part that we contemplated a lot.

HAN: I think, compared to before, we had a little more fun while working on this album. There was no time crunch, and we worked with the thought of making music that best fits who we are today, so I think the end result came out really well.

What would you say were the key highlights for the album?

Bang Chan: One thing that I hope people will notice is the improvement of all the members’ recording skills. We put a lot of effort into all the songs.

Changbin: The album includes unit songs in which all of our members took part during the creative process.

HAN: I hope people look forward to Stray Kids’ distinct musical color, our wit and how much we’ve matured.

When you guys came up with NOEASY as the title, how did you define it in your own terms?

Bang Chan: This might sound cheesy, but life itself is pretty “no easy." Everyone goes through obstacles, everyone has their own downs and lows, but I feel like it depends on how “noisy” you’re going to be to overcome those hardships.

HAN: NOEASY is trying to convey that things may be hard, but we’re going to break through that difficulty with our sound! I think the best way to explain it is that even if things are tough, as long as we have the sound of Stray Kids and the sound of STAY, we can overcome anything.

You spoiled your fans with so much pre-release content, which would you say were your favorites and why?

Lee Know: The SKZOO teaser was the most memorable. I would say the cuteness amidst the power was the key point.

Hyunjin: The trailer video was a little embarrassing to film, but after seeing it all come together, it looked so cool that I hope we get to do it again next time!

Seungmin: We worked on unit songs that were included on this album, and the Song Camp teaser videos that showed the creative process behind those unit songs were really good! I think our STAY really enjoyed them, so I hope we can do that type of content again.

About the SKZOO version of the “Thunderous” video: Whose idea was it?

Felix: As we prepared for our comeback, we wanted to impress and entertain our fans with something fun and unique, so we all came to one conclusion which was wearing our costumes for “Thunderous."

Your music has become incredibly encouraging and has touched many STAY around the world. What would you say is your ultimate message as Stray Kids?

Bang Chan: At one point in their lives, people will have a moment where they feel astray from the road that they’ve chosen, and I would like those people to know that they’re not the only ones that feel that way. So, whenever you need someone to keep you company, just know that Stray Kids are here to get you back on track.

You guys pretty much owned 2020 with hit after hit, including “God’s Menu” and “Back Door." How has it been working and releasing music in the midst of the pandemic?

Changbin: There was a lot more time being spent at home, but I didn’t want to waste that time, and instead used it to consistently work on new music. I hope people listen to our songs and gain strength during this challenging time.

Seungmin: To be honest, I was really bummed we couldn’t get to meet our STAY in person, but I think we promoted our album hoping that STAY could feel our love through videos, our music and their hearts even from afar. I’m grateful because I think our sincerity was relayed despite not being able to see each other in person. We spent our time working really hard even in the unseen!

When the pandemic is over and everything’s okay, what’s the first thing you want to do?

Bang Chan: World tour, first priority!

Lee Know: The very first thing I want to do is have a fan meeting with STAY.

Changbin: Definitely an in-person concert.

Hyunjin: I want to go on a world tour to hurry and meet our STAY all over the world and experience new cultures in different countries! I also want to perform for our STAY in-person at Korean music shows.

HAN: A concert! I want to hurry and have a concert so we can vibe with STAY and sing together in the same place. I miss this so much and can’t wait until we can do this again.

Felix: World tour!

Seungmin: I would say the first that comes to mind is a concert with STAY where we can finally greet them and have fun together!

I.N: I want to do a world tour.

Congratulations on your third anniversary! Do you guys have any wishes, individually or as a group?

Bang Chan: Individually, I just wish for everyone to be safe and happy. As a team, I wish that we can reach places that haven’t been reached before with the help from STAY.

Lee Know: I really want to be able to let STAY experience our performances visually and physically in real life as soon as possible.

Changbin: I want to make music and perform as Stray Kids for a long time.

Hyunjin: I’m sad that we can’t right now, but I would really like for this time of coronavirus to pass so we’re able to make many more memories with STAY. I really miss the fan meetings, concerts and world tours.

HAN: I want to mature more and continue growing in my music and just as a person. I would like to make even better music so that I can continue to touch STAY’s hearts and give them joy.

Felix: Individually, I hope to make a lot of memories and give a lot of hope and happiness to the STAY all around the world to the best of my ability. As a team, we really want to go on a world tour to meet our STAY as soon as possible.

Seungmin: I want to show our fans an even more improved version of ourselves. My wish is to show STAY that we’ll never go backwards!

I.N: I would like to continue improving and be described as an artist of consistent growth. I want to become an artist that’s a good influence on people.

What’s something you would like people to know about SKZ if they haven’t given them a chance yet?

Lee Know: We’ve got backbone. Once you fall for us, it’s hard to get out.

Hyunjin: I hope that after listening to our diverse music and watching our extravagant performances, people will notice us a little more.

Anything else you’d like to say? Speak now or forever hold your peace!

HAN: STAY, thank you for always giving us positive energy. We feel bad because it seems like we’re always just on the receiving end, but we’ll work hard to reciprocate what you’ve given to us! We’re always so thankful for you, and we miss you so much. We love you, and please continue to watch over us.

[derangedhyena-delphinidae]

numerous issues with “The Aftermath of Seaworld”

When I get time to do so (aka when I’m done with the documentary), I’m likely going to make a video version of this going into the details. 

But for right now, I’ve made this. Both as a guideline for me and so everyone can begin to get an idea of the severity of issues involved.

Researching things is time-consuming and can be very difficult - believe me, I know. But I’m of the mind that if you’re making content with the intent of educating people, you have a responsibility to perform a certain level of due diligence. It IS okay to express uncertainty or doubt if you have it. It is NOT okay to confidently assert things that you do not know with certainty.

The video has an anticap slant, and I’m obviously not disagreeing on that front. But again: if you’re gonna go through the trouble of teaching people something. Bare minimum... please make sure it’s actually correct. *** 1) x ‘founded in 1964 and based out of Florida’ -  ???? Seaworld definitively began on the west coast, in San Diego, CA. And given that the first park opened in early 1964… things came together before that. Uh? 2) x ‘four people founded Seaworld [...]’ For one… it wasn’t originally conceived as a restaurant, it was originally conceived as an underwater bar/lounge. Two… calling the four guys involved in founding the place “frat brothers” is fucking ridiculous and completely overlooks a) how each was actually involved and b) the overall significance of their contributions to the field as individuals. Hint: like it or not, they were important and did a lot! 

3) x If one is going to bring up SWBGCF/rescues while talking about the literal founding of SW, it gives the impression that it’s been around for that duration. It hasn’t.  It’s actually a bit unclear when SW started an organized rescue program, but the Fund itself and all that it did came about much later. The rescue information and how it’s presented is actually INCREDIBLY complex, nuanced, and has a fascinating history (from a “bad company behaving badly” perspective). Oversimplifying this, to this degree and in this misinformative way, does the facts of the situation an INCREDIBLE disservice.  

4) x [assertive statement about what the name Shamu means]  ….Uh actually there’s several explanations for the name Shamu, and the most likely one IMO seems to be the “she-namu” one, not the “friend of Namu” one(? What is this even based on.) 4b) It’s not quite clear if she’s saying “Namu was the first ever orca to be displayed and perform shows” or or Namu was the first to be displayed and, like Shamu, performed shows. Either way, Moby Doll was the first to truly be displayed to the public, not Namu.

5) x ‘Namu died after one year in captivity and you’d think that this might deter Seaworld from doing the same thing again…’ Seaworld truly had nothing to do with Namu. And they leased/took possession of Shamu before Namu died. ‘Again’? What?

6) x “Now, PETA paints a pretty disturbing picture…” [while showing Okura’s artwork] This video segment is, and this is putting it nicely, a pile of poorly-researched BULLSHIT.  -Yes, PETA talks about Shamu’s capture, re: the harpooning of her mother. This Youtuber cannot apparently be arsed to look more than 1 Google search into this, as she proceeds to dismiss the information as potentially fabricated. There are two detailed accounts of Shamu’s capture that I’m aware of - in books - and though they have some slight conflicts, it’s absolutely NOT in doubt that the female who was very likely Shamu’s mother was 1) harpooned, 2) died from her injuries and 3) this had been done to make her easier to catch/locate because there was a fucking buoy attached to the harpoon. Which she dragged around for at least 24 hours prior dying.  So maybe don’t dismiss that as PETA hysteria, maybe TRY to determine the truth of the matter, which would inform one that it is both true and completely horrifying.  -In addition, Okura is an awesome individual who has worked very hard to create a variety of informative artwork for our cause. Okura is NOT associated with PETA and it’s borderline libel in my eyes to use their artwork in this dismissive manner when the primary sources of it can be easily identified online, with full explanations and everything. Do I take special offense to this because of the misuse of artwork? Absolutely. Artists get disrespected enough online. I’m tired of it. This kind of laziness IS NOT acceptable.

7) x ‘timeline is fuzzy about when Shamu died’ …………… it’s…. It’s really not … newspapers are pretty clear about it…..

8) x [complete and utter oversimplification of the lifespan issue, which is not acceptable for anything published in 2020. It just isn’t. If you’re going to bring it up like this, either do the legwork and get into the weeds or stay out.] 8b) [same for reproductive ages. sigh]

9) x if we’re going to talk about when Cornell was involved with Seaworld it’s very important to specify when Cornell was involved with Seaworld and not make it seem like it’s present tense.

10) x “both were rescued by Seaworld” - uh? no. Zero orcas have been rescued by Seaworld. Literally none. The infected-jaw orca was Sandy, whose story is complex and certainly does not involve Seaworld until much later. And many of the orcas in that time period had bullet wounds, often only identified post-mortem because they didn’t seem to hurt the animals much. Also, unflinchingly blending 70s captivity ethics with modern ones is also complete nonsense? 

11) x [tilikum coming from sealand] inhales I am going to make an entire video centered on this fucking subject because it’s one of the single most profound arguments for Seaworld being garbage as assessed by US government agencies in the 90s yet everyone utterly fails to mention this. Why?!

12) x what on earth is this nonsense re: quoting a quote from Zimmerman’s article - which has already been removed from its original context, so the original context is not available - and then penalizing the quote for existing as if Zimmerman’s article were the context? That is offensively disingenuous. I honestly don’t know what the original context is, either - but it’s wildly inappropriate to act as if the Zimmerman article is.

13) x this is relatively minor but ‘Paul Sprong’? You literally have his name on the screen. And then mis-reading his age too? While asserting it from a static article published years ago? Effort? Where is it?

14) x ‘another trainer, Peter’ ….. Ken Peters…. 

15) [weirdly glossing over the widely-available list of orca-trainer injuries/aggressions, despite it being central to the point.] 16) x This pilot whale outrage certainly happened but it was pretty clearly Blackfish that started the cascade of woes for Seaworld. Who has ever asserted this?

17) if you’re gonna just rehash blackfish, tell people to go watch blackfish.

18) x I’ve already gone over the context issue with Seaworld calling out Howard’s statement in Blackfish here (point 23). Which is to say, IN CONTEXT in Blackfish it’s clear what Mr. Garrett is talking about but, divorced from that, it sounds incorrect. But this Youtuber AMPLIFIES the issue by doubling down on the assertion with “no record of a killer whale doing any harm to anyone in the wild.” The surfer event should always be mentioned. Yes, there’s absolutely room for doubt. But there’s also a clear demarcation between an accidental attack (eg mistaken identity, as was likely for the surfer) and intentional one (eg the incidents at marine parks.) Why do people kneecap themselves on this point 18b) please stop acting like Luna represents orcas in general.

19) x “Howard, for all of his research…” … while referring to David Duffus’ b-roll and statements. Uh. 20) x Apparently this Youtuber has single-handedly resolved the dorsal fin issue. You know, the thing that hasn’t been properly researched ever, that has been subject to a ton of debate, that isn’t 100% settled for a variety of reasons, and almost everyone talks about in terms of theories and likely possibilities.  21) x Alexis Martinez wasn’t “torn to shreds.” In a space where even moderate exaggerations are often penalized harshly by the opposition, this kind of blatant nonsense is not welcome. Plus, the reality’s bad enough… you don’t have to make anything up!

22) x *sighs. points at own webpage*

23) Talking about the shows stopping without acknowledging how that’s a bit of a farce is something else. In addition to apparently just flipping to buying what Seaworld’s selling re: its ‘improved image.’ 

*** Tl;dr video is so unrelentingly full of errors ranging from small to egregious it makes me seriously concerned for the veracity of the rest of this person’s content. The maker of the video provided a list of their sources in their video description, which I will have time to look through in detail later. The above is solely a response to the information they present IN THE VIDEO - which, is very important because let’s be real: a lot of people are not going to look at the list of sources. People don’t even do it when citing papers (no really, you’d be surprised, fml.) For anyone who wants to whinge that I haven’t linked or asserted any sources of my own for my claims… well, remember what I said about time-consuming and ‘I’m busy’? Yhea. Getting all of that together will be part of making a video. So if you want to shrug loudly at my list here… you can, that’s your prerogative, I’m happy to say I DGAF if that’s your takeaway. 

What I hope, is that if there’s anything I’ve made clear over the While of running this blog, it’s that I don’t fuck around when it comes to sources and information and do my best to provide what information exists, all of it, not just cherrypicked bits and bobs. Anyways. Here’s step 0 at least. Please don’t share that video. Pretty please.