#was not expecting it to get as dark as it did but I’m all for it

[bi-writes]

anatomy of us (2) | alpha!ghost x f!omega!reader

type: limited series, part 2 (7.2k) in an attempt to tame an unruly alpha, you are given. he did not come with warning labels. but neither did you.

series cw: reader described as plus-sized/curvier, alpha/beta/omega dynamics + universe, dark!simon, mature language and content, suggestive language and content, graphic depictions of murder + violence, military criticism, protective!simon, dubcon (but reader does consent), possessiveness, dom/sub dynamics, size kink, praise kink, unprotected piv, cumplay, oral (fem!receiving) 18+

PART 1

Tradition is not something you are fond of.

It’s something forced on you. When you question it, it’s offensive–how dare you question these things, made sacred over time? Why would you want to betray thousands of years of history? Time makes it definitive. Your being makes it natural. You submit because that is the natural thing to do, so in that sense, you submit to it all.

That is your duty. That is your calling. When you are claimed, you belong to them. You are property. Autonomy be damned–your place is on your knees, keeping your mouth shut, and any behavior against that is nothing short of a punishable offense, proper. Disobedient omegas make for troublesome households.

To keep you in line, you must be held at a short length from your alpha. It is what is done. It is what is expected.

Tradition.

Simon keeps a hand on you, curled at the base of your spine as he leads you back to where the sleeping quarters are. You know it’s for your protection, but the better part of you wants to smack him off of you whenever you feel his palm press just slightly against you. When you make it back into your room, Simon pauses in the doorway after he opens it for you. He looks nervous almost, sheepish. You turn to face him, looking him up and down. “You can come in if you want. I’m not gonna carry all my stuff by myself, you could probably carry a fucking tank looking at you.”

Simon finally comes inside, ducking his head a little to make it in. You know this room wasn’t meant to house an alpha, but it’s still startling to see him do it, taking up way too much space to be anything but claustrophobic. He watches as you pack your things, stuffing your clothes into your bags and picking up small trinkets around the bedside table and desk. After the bag starts to get heavy, you shove it into his arms as you look towards the bed. It’s a standard issue twin-sized, with barely enough sheets to keep you warm and a lumpy pillow that you hate. You make a face at it before turning around and putting more things into Simon’s arms as you empty the closet.

“Tha’ it?” Simon mutters, still able to peek over the mountain of items that he holds, and you shrug.

“That’s it.”

Simon’s own room is like a hospital room. It’s too clean–there’s nothing personal anywhere, no pictures or barely any clothes other than military issue fatigues. The only civilian clothes he has wouldn’t even make you think twice if you saw him in a bar–Simon will always look like a soldier, through and through, and his room stinks like it. It smells clinical, and nothing about it is cozy or warm. You stand in the middle of the room as Simon puts your things down. You ring your hands together nervously, eyeing the bed with one single, thin sheet on it. It’s too small of a bed for the both of you. It’s too small of a bed just for Simon–you don’t want to think about the kind of sleeping arrangements you’ll need to fit with him on it.

“Wot’s wrong?” Simon asks lowly. You look over your shoulder at him. He’s putting your things into the closet. He’s divided it in half already, and some of your clothes are already hung up next to his. You look back at the bed, pursing your lips.

“There’s not enough blankets,” you say softly. “A-And…And the pillows, here, I don’t like them.”

Simon turns back to your bag, picking up another shirt to hang. You glare at the back of him. It doesn’t do anything; he doesn’t erupt in flames like you might have hoped, but it does give you a moment to notice how well those jeans fit him.

Fuck. Keep it together.

“I’ll get you more blankets,” he shrugs. “And a different pillow.”

The answer is immediate. No fuss. You want to complain, to bite back at him for it, but you don’t know how you would explain your displeasure. You’re looking for a reason to tell your omega that she’s a scheming, hopeless, naïve little shit.

“...I don’t have to win you when y’r already mine.” Isn’t that what he had said? Isn’t that what he had said when he gripped you by the throat and made you realize that everything you had thought about alphas was true? Hadn’t he already shown you that none of them are redeemable?

Not Kate. Not John. Certainly not Simon–they’re all scheming, terrible fucking people, and you cannot wait until you can sink your teeth into Simon’s jugular and rip it out.

Belonging to, being one’s own, fuck if you care. Simon can claim ownership all he wants, but he’ll never tame you. Your omega might be pulling the strings at the moment, but you’re going through withdrawals, you think. Your medication was your lifeline. It kept you from falling off the tightrope, and you just need to learn how to stay upright without it. You can. When you get it back, when it’s in your hands again, she’ll understand.

She has to understand that only you know what’s good for you.

Simon places the rest of your things on his desk. A couple personal things, like your jewelry and some knickknacks, and then your bag with the rest of your clothes to be folded and put away. You take a seat on the edge of the bed, taking a deep breath. At least before, you could pretend like things were still a little normal. You could pretend that in your own room, you were simply waiting for another assignment, that you were just waiting for Kate to give you a call and move you somewhere new, somewhere safer.

“Am I just supposed to stay here and wait for you?” You ask finally. Simon shuffles around the room. He doesn’t look at you; instead, he takes a seat at a desk way too small for him and spreads a few papers around, frowning when he reads something that he doesn’t like. “Is that…is that my job?”

“Dunno.” Simon takes his phone out of his pocket, and he starts typing. “Don’t really feel like babysittin’.”

“I can take care of myself, you know,” you tell him. “I…I have combat experience. I was in training before this.”

Simon snorts, still focused on his phone. He shakes his head a little.

“Cute,” he mutters. “Tha’s cute.”

Patronizing shit.

“I bet I can shoot a target ten times better than you,” you spit at him. His fingers hover over the screen for just a moment, irritated, before he goes back to typing. “And I can hold my own. I don’t need a babysitter.”

Simon puts his phone back into his pocket. He crosses his arms over his chest, letting out a deep breath before coming over to stand in front of you. You tip your head back, and he reaches down with a hand to cup under your jaw, holding you there. Just like that–your omega has you. You lean in, just that much. Simon sees it in your eyes, and he sniffs, looking you over.

Maybe he thinks you’re pathetic. In some sense, you agree with him, because what the fuck is wrong with me? You get one look into Simon’s eyes, and something chemical in you fires. You bend, and you relax, and you know if he asked you to open your mouth so he could spit in it, it would take a tremendous amount of effort to tell him no. It angers you and excites you all the same, and the conflicting flashes under your ribs bring tears to your eyes.

You hate yourself. You hate yourself for not being able to say no. You hate yourself for being everything they said you would be. You hate yourself for being nothing like you thought you were.

You’re soft. Sweet. All bark, no bite, a spiteful kitten that deep down, aims to please. The only thing that really baffles you, though, is why you only feel this way with Simon.

Is it because they told you that you were his mate? Is it because he’s done something, that he’s projecting some kind of scent? Has he already unknowingly changed your very makeup so your body knows that you are bound to him? When you look into John’s eyes, you see alpha. You see big, salivating dog, and if you could, you’d rip the hairs of his beard out just to see him in pain.

But Simon–it’s like you can’t move. Every time you look at him, and he looks at you, he holds you there. Just like now, he’s got you, and you feel like he can read everything you’re feeling. He’s being fed your secrets, and you hate him for it, but I can’t look away, please look away, please don’t make me–

“Need to get you somethin’ to eat,” Simon says finally. “And it’s time to meet the rest of the lot.”

Simon is starting to get used to keeping a hand on you. It annoys you a little, to feel his hand at your back, but the annoyance dissolves when you realize this base is filled with sneering alphas. They holler and yell, and they are very large and angry, but they still are small compared to Simon. They quiet whenever they walk past you, and even the whiff of omega doesn’t deter them with Simon behind you.

In the mess hall, you see Captain Price sitting at a table with two others. When you get closer to the table, you cough a little, stumbling back, and Simon catches you around the waist to hold you upright. The stench of alphas hits you like a truck, and Simon grunts as he tells you relax, fuckin’ hell.

You give him a hard stare–how the fuck would he know? There’s four alphas in your close vicinity, and they’re all puffing their chests and smiling, and it stings to smell them all at once. You turn your head a little to shield yourself, and when you filter everything else out but Simon, it frustrates you a little how much of him seems to calm you down.

Smells so good. Get closer. Press your nose to it, I-I want more–

“I see you two are getting along nicely,” John comments, leaning back in his chair. You roll your eyes a little, and when you lock eyes with him, you purse your lips and try to look anything but pleased. Simon guides you to sit down; he motions to the bench, just to the left of where someone else is already sitting–a big, burly soldier with crazy blue eyes. He has a terrible haircut, short along the sides with tufts of curls falling down the middle and over his forehead. He’s wiggling his eyebrows at his lieutenant behind you. Across from him, there’s another alpha with dark eyes and soft skin, and he’s smiling like an idiot around the rim of his plastic cup. You’re a little nervous–you had spent most of your time on your old base surrounded by betas who barely gave you a glance, and now you’re off your meds and being hit with a million different sensations everywhere you go. Simon’s touch on your back eases your shoulders a little.

“Tha’s Johnny,” Simon points to the one next to you. “Tha’s Gaz. ‘n I’m sure ya had the pleasure of our Captain.”

“Yeah, looks like your beard is still in tact, so glad to see it,” you say curtly, crossing your arms over your chest. The two sergeants laugh, ducking their heads, and John raises a brow before looking at Simon with a clenched jaw. Simon just shrugs, stretching his arm out on the back of your chair, and you get the feeling this happens often–John giving Simon that look, and Simon merely brushing it off. You smile to yourself a little, looking at Simon from over your shoulder. When you meet eyes, he stares back, looking over your face. He lingers on your lips for just a second too long before looking back up again.

I bet he tastes good under that mask. Let’s find out.

“Hungry?” He asks, and you blink. Your omega has never been inside of your head like this. You nearly opened your mouth and asked him for it, asked him please, please–let me taste, I won’t look, just let me taste you. You swallow her down a little, and you just nod to keep yourself moving. Simon stands up to make his way towards where the food is, and you watch curiously as instead of standing in line, he pushes open a door into the kitchen and disappears behind it.

“LT’s been gettin’ ye special meals,” Johnny says with a full mouth. You frown a little, and not just cause he’s chewing with his mouth a little too open.

“What do you mean?”

“He has the cooks make you somethin’ special,” Gaz says as he takes a sip of water. He leans back, smiling again, and it irks you a little. Alphas are brutes, disgusting big things with too many hormones, and you hate that this one gets to be pretty, too. Not that John or his sergeant aren’t attractive, but this one definitely enjoys a good mirror selfie, and it shows. “Something not on the menu. He didn’t like that you weren’t eating much, at the beginning. Made a fuss, and now he gets you better food.”

“He can do that?”

“Well, would ye say no to tha’ big man?” Johnny snorts, dipping his crusty bread in sauce. You look back towards the door, and Simon comes out holding a tray. He sets it down in front of you, and you bite your lip looking down at it. It smells so good, and you pick up your fork gently, sticking it into the pasta and twirling it. When you take a bite and sigh, Simon takes a seat next to you, and you can barely hear the sweet rumble in his chest of satisfaction.

Providing for you. Taking care of you. He’s so capable, isn’t he? Look at what he does for you.

If Simon notices you scoot closer to him, he doesn’t say anything. You don’t react either–it wasn’t a conscious choice.

Simon’s shower has hot water. Not that the showers you’d had were cold, but the communal showers were just that–communal. Shared, and although your escort always made sure you were the only one in there while you showered, it was still feeding off a water heater that always had barely any juice left. Lukewarm showers, so you tried to finish quick.

Simon’s shower turns the water scalding. You giggle with relief when you stand under it, letting it loosen your sore muscles and relieve your aching bones. It feels good, and you take a little longer in there, taking your time and enjoying the heat.

When it’s time to wash your body, you realize you’re missing your own soap. You look around for something else, noticing the unlabeled bottle that rests on a ledge. You squirt a pump of it into your palms, and when you raise it to your nose, your eyes flutter shut.

It’s the eucalyptus you smelled on Simon. A little plastic aftersmell, which you know is from whatever backwater dollar store the military buys it from, but on Simon, it smells so good. You lather it in your hands and hold it up to your nose, and you sigh deeply.

He’s just outside. Why don’t you call for him? I bet he’s listening. I bet he’s waiting for us.

You slide your hands down your arms. With the heat of the water, the whole bathroom starts to smell like it, and you let your hands slide down further, over your waist, between your thighs. When your fingers touch your puffy clit, you’re nearly jolted back into reality.

“Fuck–” You gasp, reaching for the level, shutting the water off. The last of the water curls down the drain, and you cough as you look around. You curl your toes, grounding yourself, and then you get out of the shower and reach for the towel. When you look into the mirror, your pupils are blown wide, and you feel like you don’t recognize yourself. You drop the towel and dress yourself, trying to keep your mind occupied with menial tasks.

Get your shit together.

When you open the bathroom door, Simon is back from his little errand he had run. He’s carrying a few blankets and a thick comforter, and there’s a few new pillows on the bed with it. You use the towel to keep drying the wet strands of your hair, and Simon turns around when he hears you walk in further.

You pass by him wordlessly as you reach the bed. You put your hands on the blankets that he put down, and you close your eyes when you feel how soft they are. Threaded cotton and fleece, lots of thick feathers in the comforter to make it nice and fluffy. When you turn to look over your shoulder, Simon does a terrible job of pretending like he wasn’t just staring at your ass in the little sleep shorts you’re wearing. You want to snap at him, but your omega pinches your tongue.

Take them off. Take them off. Take them off.

“So, what…” You clear your throat. “How are we supposed to sleep in that bed? T-Together?”

Simon tilts his head to the side. You start to despise the mask. You hate that you can’t tell what he’s thinking, not even a little, and after the rather joyous conversations you’ve had with Simon (barf), you can’t say you’re entirely excited to be in this close of a space with him.

“Don’t worry,” Simon murmurs. “I’ll be good.”

Oh, that totally makes you feel better.

Prick.

He makes you get into bed and turn facing the wall as he turns out the lights. He pulls at the edge of his mask uncomfortably, and you realize he doesn’t want you to see his fine. Fine, you think to yourself, throwing the sheets back with a huff, bet you’re fucking ugly mug would blind me anyways.

You cuddle under all the blankets, snuggling into the new pillow that sinks under your head. You hum gently, closing your eyes, and you aren’t able to see Simon rubbing his chest warmly as he watches you. He sucks on his teeth, not truly understanding what he feels, but knowing that it’s soothing the beast in him to take care of you.

It rattles him. Simon isn’t used to this. He’s not used to feeling like he doesn’t have control. He resisted this for so long. He tried so hard to fight, he said no to Kate over and over and over again.

Omegas to Simon were liabilities. To care was to have a target on your back. To be mated meant having something to lose.

Ask Price, is what he told her, ask the fuckin’ sergeants, anyone but me, but she wouldn’t hear it. It had to be him, it had to be, and then she locked him into a room with her, and she leveled with him.

She told him that you are special. That you are precious. That omegas like you don’t exist, that you are one in a single generation, and there isn’t anyone else in the world that will do except for him.

Price, married to the field. The sergeants, immature and might as well be titled barracks bunnies. But Simon–purebred, quiet, controlled. Terrified of himself and what he is. His unofficial pack that he defends with his entire being, that is the only alpha worth giving to you.

Kate had thought about it before. What it might be like to push the hair away from your neck and sink her teeth there. As easy as putting her signature to paper, she could have the CIA running laps to keep you protected, but she knew that wasn’t the life for her. It couldn’t be.

In every situation, Kate would have to choose that lesser evil, and in her world, it would mean her choice would unlikely be you.

Simon? Simon answered to no one. Unlike his sergeants, he cared little for authority; he wouldn’t blink twice saying no to his superior. Unlike his Captain, Simon didn’t mind choosing the bloody way out. He was the first with his finger on the trigger, and the last to sweep a room. Kate knew–if Simon had to choose between the greater good and the omega he claimed?

Fuck the greater good. That, she could count on.

If Kate only asked for one thing, it would be this. She did promise you. She promised she would keep you away from it all. She promised that she would make things right. She promised that she would protect you, but even Kate answers to others, and the reality of this kind of world is that the only way to really protect you was to give you away.

To put you into the same world that you had only begged to be kept away from.

Nobody likes playing matchmaker, but maybe putting together the most stubborn and angry people in the world might save you from yourselves. At least she hoped so.

You’re nearly asleep when you feel Simon come to bed. All the lights are off, and it’s pitch black in the room. There’s some shuffling around the room, and then you feel the blankets move. All of the sudden, a heat stronger than you’ve ever felt takes up the entire bed. Pressed against your back, a solid chest, and then a huge arm falls over your waist.

“We cuddling now?” You mumble sleepily, and Simon breathes out slowly, not responding. When you fall asleep, it’s unnervingly easy. Your omega purrs, digging her nails into you, and when you turn your head in the dark and feel the brush of his unmasked face against yours, she preens.

He’s right there–just a little taste. Just a little. Please, please, please–

Omegas cannot claim, but they can bite. It takes everything inside of you not to sink your teeth into him.

“You smell that? Smells like fuckin’ sweets, mates.”

You take off your headphones and safety glasses, looking over your shoulder. There’s a few recruits a few lanes down from you, wiggling their eyebrows and licking their lips. One of them crudely grabs his crotch, winking at you. You make a face.

Gross.

“Let me see you, baby. Smell so good.”

You holster the gun you’re holding, leaning against the counter with your hip. You raise a brow, tilting your head to the side.

“Are you done?” You ask, and they take that as their cue to start walking closer. An invitation.

They don’t get very far. You smell him before you see him. On instinct, your shoulders relax with that whiff of charcoal. You push off the counter just in time for him to come up behind you, and you feel the heat of his chest as it presses against your back. The recruits in front of you stop immediately, and you feel a disgusting sense of satisfaction when Simon bends over your shoulder to look at you.

“‘n wot’s this?” Simon growls. You shrug, crossing your arms over your chest.

“I don’t know. They wanna have a dick-measuring contest, but I think they’re afraid they’re gonna lose,” you say. You let out an annoyed sigh, turning again to put your safety glasses on. You put the headphones back over your ears and take the gun out of your holster, turning the safety off as you line it up with the paper targets near the back of the course. “You know. Cause my dick is way bigger.”

You unload the clip just for fun. You’re supposed to be practicing on accuracy, which for you meant slower, spaced-out shots to try and hit the same spot over and over, but the sound of the gun going off again and again helps distract you from the laughing, untrained dogs that are littered across the shooting range.

When you put the gun down after emptying the magazine, Simon is salivating. The paper target head is obliterated, each bullet almost next to its last. When you turn around, Simon tilts his head to the side. You holster the gun, starting to walk, and Simon lets his eyes drop to the sway of your hips as you pass by him. It’s not a conscious decision, the way his fingers curl into fists and squeeze hard.

“Told you,” you say to him. “Huge dick, right, baby?”

Something flares in Simon’s chest when he hears it. Like a switch, his legs start moving, following you, and when he passes by a recruit that is standing much too close to you, Simon shoves the recruit back so hard, they smack their nose against the wall and curses from the impact, blood dripping under their bruised nose.

The rest of the day, you don’t see another rookie walk even five feet into your vicinity. Even without a mark on your neck, you are claimed, and right before you leave your room for dinner, Simon is fitting a dark hoodie over your head. The smell overwhelms you. It’s soaked in his scent, and you turn to face him, looking at him suspiciously. Your omega keeps you from questioning him. She wants you to start walking, because she knows he’ll touch you when you do.

It’s that night that Simon asks John for you to join them. All Simon does is slide the shredded paper target across his desk. John picks it up, tacking it onto the wall. He chuckles, shaking his head. It’s an impressive piece of paper, but being a good shot isn’t the only reason someone is cleared to work with them. Even besides that, it’s forbidden.

“Omegas aren’t allowed in the field, Simon,” John reminds him. “You know that.”

“Think tha’s why we should take her,” Simon mutters. “She’s a distraction. A good one.”

“A weapon,” John frowns. He can already hear Kate screaming into his ear if she ever saw you geared up between them on an op.

“A tool.”

“And what does she think of that, eh?” John slips his hat off, tossing it onto his desk. He sighs, running a hand over his beard, and he shakes his head. “And Kate…Kate would hang my fuckin’ head.”

“Not Kate’s responsibility anymore, she’s mine,” Simon bites back. He knows it’s wrong. In all honesty, the sentiment tasted bad from the moment he said it to you, but it is easier to let you believe that he’s using you then try and make you understand him. You wouldn’t understand. You wouldn’t get his reasons, and that’s fine, so if he has to be the bad guy, so be it.

The least he could do is make himself useful. Put your skills to work, poke your mind. See what you can really do.

“Don’t let your girl hear you talkin’ like that, Simon,” John says lowly. “Not her, and certainly not Kate.”

“But you agree,” Simon continues, chuckling lowly. “I speak for her. ‘n I think she’d be right in on it, Captain. Wot else is she to do, eh? Sit in my fuckin’ quarters and wait f’me? Wot kind of life is tha’? She needs this. She’s good. I can teach ‘er. She’ll learn. Well and good she will, I know it.”

John sniffs, running a big hand over his short hair before tapping a pen over the target paper on the wall.

“I need her OK,” John relents finally. “I need to hear it from her. I get that, I’m alright with it. But she has to know what she’s getting into, Simon. And no one but you is responsible for her. If she gets into something, I’m not gonna risk Soap or Gaz for it–”

“I know,” Simon mutters. “She’ll be my shadow. I’ll teach ‘er.”

She’ll be good. She’ll be good because she’s mine.

“Bravo-7, sitrep.”

“Eyes on target. Waiting on confirmation.” Simon looks over his shoulder for a moment, where you’re sitting as his cover. You look cute, he thinks. All geared up. He lets his eyes sweep over the cargo pants that are cinched around your waist. Your nice curves. Thick thighs. Fuck, you smell good, even with all the sand up his nose and the smoke clinging to his mask. You have your rifle tucked into your elbow, and you’ve got it aimed towards the door of the roof.

“Is it always so fucking hot?” You ask, running your wrist over your lip. You’re sweating; you can feel it dripping down the back of your neck and along your back. You’re wearing a lot of gear, but you’ve done this before, and you don’t remember it being so uncomfortable. It must be the climate–you’re not used to this kind of desert, and you need to get it together.

Despite the irritation you feel every time you look at Simon, your omega wants to please him. She wants to show him she can do this, that she’s capable, and you’re starting to not like that she’s behaving as if you and her are one and the same.

I’m in control. Shut the fuck up. Let me focus.

“Just watch the door,” Simon mutters, turning back to focus. He adjusts the scope of his rifle, taking a deep breath as he leans into the stock. He gets his target into his line of sight, and he narrows his eye a little more to watch the group more closely on the ground. It’s hard to ignore you. Normally, the person covering him goes almost unnoticed. Their scent never affects him, not enough to make him look away from his scope, but there’s something in the air way too close to him, and he scrunches his nose a little as he adjusts his position on the ground. “You stink, by the way.”

“Shut the fuck up,” you snap. “Not my fault.”

“Certainly is y’r fault.”

“You reek, too, you ass,” you mumble, wiping your forehead again. You adjust how you’re sitting, clearing your throat. It’s scratchy, and you’re starting to itch a little all over, too. “Like wet dog.”

Simon smiles under his mask. He keeps his index finger next to the trigger, and you keep yours on it.

“How much longer do we have to do this? I mean…I thought you were SAS. Don’t you guys…get your hands real dirty? I mean, don’t you go tearing doors down? Get a lot of action? I mean, we’re just sitting ducks on a roof here right now.”

“Wot, you wanna go kick some doors down now?” Simon asks. He shakes his head. “The real job is boring. We do things nice and clean, we only get dirty when we ‘ave to. If I can get a target from 1000 yards away, then tha’s wot I’ll do. Besides. This is wot I’m good at.”

“Yeah, you look real good there on your knees, honey.”

Simon blinks hard when something strong hits his nose. It stings, makes his eyes water. He coughs a little, dropping his head for a moment.

“Fuckin’ Christ,” Simon hisses. “Wot the fuck is wrong with ya?”

“I-I don’t know,” you whisper. You take your hand off your rifle for a moment to adjust the collar of your shirt, but it doesn’t help. You shift a little, loosening your tactical vest. You want to take it off, but you know that’s a bad idea out here. It’s hard to think clearly, though, when your brain is cloudy and you’re starting to see things in double every so often. “It’s…it’s too hot.”

Simon huffs, “‘n when was the last time you had a heat?”

“I’ve…I’ve never.” You clear your throat. “I’ve never had one.”

Can you smell him? I can smell him. He smells so good.

Simon nearly leaves his post. He grips his rifle tight, gloved hands squeezing the metal, and he turns to look at you incredulously.

“Fuckin’ repeat tha’?”

“I know you’re blind and dumb, but don’t tell me you’re fucking deaf, too,” you mumble. You swallow, wiping your face again, and Simon presses on the radio on his shoulder.

“Bravo-7 to Bravo-6, how long do we got?”

“Just observation on target for now. Why?”

“Need 10 minutes.”

Simon shuts off the radio. You blink, starting to see double pretty consistently now, and you take a shaky breath as you grip your rifle a little tighter. You hear shuffling behind you, and you look back to see Simon moving from his position.

“What are you doing? Simon–”

“Get over ‘ere.” Simon sets his rifle down. “Tha’ wasn’t a fuckin’ suggestion, tha’ was an order!”

There’s something different in his voice at the end. Something more animal that lilts his drawl, and it makes you coherent enough to start moving–like his voice made all the fog clear up for just a few moments, long enough for you to realize you need him.

Closer. Closer. Closer.

You put your rifle down, crawling over to him, and just as you stumble, Simon catches you. You put your hands on his shoulders, falling into his lap, and he hoists you up until you’re straddling him. You feel him starting to tug on your cargos, and even in your daze, you squeeze his shoulders.

“S-Simon? What are you…What are you doing?”

“Y’r gonna go into heat soon,” Simon mutters. Alarm bells go off in your head, and you dig your nails into his shoulders. He can see it clearly–the panic on your face.

“H-Heat? R-Right now?”

“Not right now,” Simon clicks his tongue. “More like a…pre-heat. Get y’r bloody pants off–”

When Simon tugs your cargos down enough, you gasp when you see the mess your panties are in. They’re soaked, drenched until the cotton is a darker color, sticking to your cunt, and you whimper as Simon tugs you back into his lap with your pants around your ankles. It’s awkward and messy, and you’re sweating bullets, hot and bothered, and your chest feels tight. There’s nothing romantic about it, nothing sweet about the way Simon turns you in his lap. It’s hurried, but you’re just as desperate, clawing to whatever piece of him you can touch and trying to sink into him. If you could, you’d pry him open and force yourself to tuck yourself inside of him. You want to live there forever. You want to be in his skin, soaking it all in–you want it. You want this, don’t you?

He’s touching us! He’s touching us! Let him in!

“W-What’s happening t-to me?”

“‘s olright,” Simon whispers in your ear. “I’ve got ya. There we are…” He cups your pussy, making you squirm. You jolt in his lap, throwing your head back against his shoulder, and he hums as you sink into his touch. Something inside you curls and lights on fire. Your vision blurs, and his scent surrounds you. “Oh…fuck…tha’ wot ya needed, swee’eart? Yeah…”

Yes! Yes! Yes!

“Simon–” Your back arches, and you push your hips into his hand. When he touches your clit, your omega seizes inside your head, and it’s a feeling like you’ve never felt before.

She takes the reigns; and God, does she fucking pull.

You palm at the zipper of his pants. There’s something there, something you want–and you need it. There’s something in your chest that blinds you, that familiar voice in your head that chants–take it out, take it out, take it out.

“‘m workin’ on it, love,” you hear from behind, and you realize you’re talking. You’re out of your body, you think. You’re not yourself. When you feel him in your daze, big and throbbing under your hand, you whine. It comes from deep within your chest, a bubble of nonsense, and Simon coos. He drags your hips closer, and his cock slips under you, between your folds, and you use your palm to keep him pressed to you. You can’t see him, but you felt him when you first met him, and you’re feeling him now.

If there was any doubt that he was anything but an alpha, that thought disappears when his fat tip kisses your clit. He’s hot and throbbing under your hand, and he is more than enough to appease the voice in your head that’s screaming for some kind of inherent relief that it knows he can give.

“Simon, I need it–I need it–”

“I know, love.”

Fuck, Simon would win any dick-measuring contest, you think. Barely the tip of him, and you’re baring your teeth, gripping his thighs and digging your nails into him as you try and breathe through the stretch. He’s not even fully hard yet; the blood is rushing to his cock, and you moan and cry as he sits you down further and further and further–

“What the fuck–what is it you have in your fucking pants, a-a fucking pipe–?!”

“Y’r so much prettier when y’r mouth ain’t runnin’,” Simon mutters. “Ahh–fuck–’s mine, oll mine–”

You put your hands on his knees and throw it back. You’re feral, brain foggy, and all you can think about is getting yourself off. Your body clings to Simon like a thick, curling vice, pussy clamping around him and taking him to the root. You’re dripping down your thighs, wetting his cargos, and you’re thankful that he’s wearing black, otherwise you can’t think about the mess you’d really be leaving on him. The sounds are lewd. Frantic smack, smack, smack against his thick thighs, and the sound is only making you drool for more. He’s so big. He’s hitting you deep, and you swear your insides have never been stretched this far, but it’s like your body is molding itself to fit him. Like you’re making room for him.

It’s so good. It feels right. Your omega growls like an animal, crying with relief. It’s the only thing she’s ever wanted, and she has it in her hands, and she licks at your scent gland until it practically vibrates. Simon’s face is pressed to it, like he can hear her calling. His mask is the only thing separating you, but you can feel his teeth straining against the fabric. They cut over the gland, wet like his tongue is poking against it, too, and your omega screams.

Bite me, bite me, bite me.

“Not yet,” Simon grunts. “Won’t take.”

“You’ll make it take.”

He laughs, and then he punches the air out of you with a nice thrust. Then he’s on you. Suddenly, you’re on your knees, your tummy against the sandy rooftop, with a stallion of a soldier on top of you, taking you like his last meal.

He sounds like more bear than man. Growling, spitting, both hands on either side of your head as he fucks you into the floor. There’s a smile on your face, soft relief that leaves you in your pretty moans and gurgled pleas. It feels so good. The tip of his cock curves and hits against the same place each time, sending pulses that rack your body over and over and over again. Your thighs are shaking, and then Simon slips one hand under you and cups your pussy, fitting it just right until you can grind down on his palm in perfect timing with the way the fat tip of him hits you just well enough. It should hurt. You’ve never taken anything so big–of course you’ve practiced, but nothing can prepare you for the real thing.

This is still practice. You’re not in your heat, not really, and Simon hasn’t lost his fucking mind yet.

Like a fiend, you chase it. The stars, the mountain to climb, the beautiful end. You get up a little more onto your knees and you wrap a hand around his neck, force him against your jaw. You goad him on with pretty words, soft moans–that’s it, right there, please.

It’s not his first time. It’s not his first time relieving an itch he can’t scratch, and it’s not his first time taking an omega by the neck and pounding into her until she can’t speak, but it’s the first time his resolve shatters.

He wants to bite. He’s never felt the urge to bite. If it wasn’t for the mask, his teeth would be an inch deep in your neck, and he’d be memorizing what your blood tasted like for the first time. Your scent is just that much off that he knows it isn’t the right time, but fuck–the need is there. It’s clear.

Special. One of a kind. No one like her. Soft. Sweet. Mine.

His knot swells a little, but it doesn’t lock. You’re not in a proper heat, so it’s not right just yet, but you can feel the edge of it, like the preface to a glorious poem. Thick and spongy, hot, and when he comes, your eyes roll back in your head. It feels like being thirsty for days on end and finally getting that sweet drink of crystal clear water. He pumps you full, creamy and thick and dribbling between your thighs as you squeeze them together. Subconsciously, you’re trying to keep it inside, and Simon groans when as he latches his mouth over your scent gland under the mask and sucks–so hard, it pinches you just right.

The stars align. The tide wanes. You mumble softly, dopey smile on your face, and when your own high hits you, and you’re squirting into his hand, you let his rumbling, low voice pull you back to earth.

“I ‘ave ya, swee’eart,” he says. “Shhh…easy, kitty…Shh…yeah, easy.”

You sigh with relief. Simon handles you with ease. He picks you up, gets you to sit back on your heels. You don’t see it, but Simon fits his wet fingers under the mask, and you keen when you hear him suck on his fingers and hum.

He likes us. Hear that? He likes us.

“Want you to eat me,” you giggle suddenly, and Simon wipes you down, picking your pants back up and zipping them. He pats your ass gently, smoothing a hand over the back of your neck. He knows you’re still in a different headspace. He knows there’s still something else drawing your breath, but he’s trying not to think about it too much. It sounds so much like you.

“Do plenty o’tha’ when we’re in the thick o’it, kitty.”

Back in the humvee, Johnny is smiling like an idiot. He’s sitting next to Kyle, hitting him with his elbow as he wiggles his eyebrows at you and Simon sitting across from them. You tilt your head to the side, glaring.

“What?” You snap, and Johnny cackles. His eyes are flashing, and he reeks like happiness.

“Smells like ye had fun.”

“My gun is loaded, shithead,” you warn him. “And I know how the fucking safety works.”

When Johnny moves to sit in the front near your captain, you try not to think about the sudden warmth over your knee, and the squeeze of Simon’s hand on you.

NEXT

[nadvs]

the act of unravelling (part three)

pairing rafe cameron x pogue! female reader

rating mature 18+

summary you never expected you’d get tangled up with a kook, least of all, rafe cameron. one night, you make a life-altering decision to get revenge on someone you both despise. after you vow to keep what happened a secret, your relationship begins to twist into something more.

tags very dark! violence, homicide, drug and alcohol use, parental neglect, mental illness, s/a, trauma. no smut.

< prev

Being in Rafe’s truck again is like being thrown back into a bad dream you can’t wake up from. You remember every detail from that night, the smell of bleach, the ache in your bones.

He parked by the edge of the country club lot, and as he settles in his seat and shuts the door, he wraps both of you in privacy behind his tinted windows.

“What is it?” you ask, your voice cutting through the tension. Rafe rakes his hand through his hair. He seems nervous, a contradiction to the smugness you’ve gotten used to.

“You were right,” he admits. “Cops aren’t even sniffing around yet and people think it was me.”

You meet his eyes, the blue hue bright and striking. The night it happened, you’d only seen him through the dark. Now, in the daylight, he almost looks innocent. But then you remember the loudness of the gun and how angry he looked when he fired it.

“What happened?” you ask.

“Last night,” he begins, “a few of us were hanging out and people were talking about how something might’ve happened to him. This guy had his name in my mouth… said some shit about how they should probably ask me.”

You nod slowly, taking his words in. You expected as much. As someone who openly hated Porter, Rafe’s likely at the top of everyone’s list of suspects.

“What’d you do?” you say.

“I swung at him.”

You exhale defeatedly, looking up at the ceiling of his car. He’s such a loose cannon that for the first time since that night, you worry that he won’t be able to keep his mouth shut.

“Damn it, Rafe,” you complain. “And you were giving me shit for being obvious?”

His temper flares like a match thrown into a pool of gasoline.

“I’m not gonna sit there and let some asshole say that shit about me,” he mutters. “This is why we need to have our story straight, alright? If you even think about ratting me out, you’ll regret it.”

You tense up. So, this is why he so desperately needed to talk to you. You can’t believe you thought you could find any comfort in him.

“You don’t need to threaten me,” you say sharply. Rafe is taken aback by the confusion on your face. You look like you’d never even considered selling him out. But maybe you’re just a great liar.

“We said we’re in this together,” you continue. “Neither of us leaves the other, no matter how messy it gets. That’s the whole point of being each other’s alibis.”

Rafe sucks his teeth. You realize just how on edge he is about this. He was so comfortable the night it happened. Almost careless. Irritated at how anxious you were. Now, it’s like he’s spiraling.

“I won’t let this ruin my life,” Rafe mumbles. He huffs an unamused chuckle, looking out of the driver’s side window. “I’m not going to jail. I’m not…”

He trails into silence. You stare at his profile. The coldness you’ve always seen in him has been shadowed by a deep paranoia.

“I’m freaked out, too,” you admit. He looks at you again. “But this is only going to work if we trust each other. We need to stick to our story so well that even we start to believe it.”

He tilts his head, looking at you with skepticism, a wrinkle between his brows.

“Don’t tell me you haven’t thought about screwing me over, Pogue,” he says. “You could say I did it and scared you into staying quiet.”

“Are you that paranoid?” you ask. “I won’t go behind your back. I promise. Even if it’s just a cover-up, we need to act like we’re friends now.”

Rafe gives you a once-over, the hardness in his face slowly fading.

“And don’t call me that,” you say. “You know my name.”

He breathes a real chuckle this time. Despite your better judgement, your heart flutters now that you’ve earned a smile from him.

“You’ll take it to the grave?” he murmurs.

“I will. You, too?”

“Yeah,” he says. He studies you again, realizing that you don’t have a guilty conscience at all. “You really don’t regret it.”

“No,” you state. The agony of reliving what Porter did to you hurts more than any sort of remorse you feel for taking his life.

Rafe is surprised to hear you don’t wish you could take what you did back. You’re as cold-blooded as he is. You might be the only person who comes close to understanding what it’s like being controlled by anger this intense.

“I just hate how I can’t stop thinking about if we left any evidence,” you say.

“Yeah.” He settles back, adjusting in his seat with ease, the tension between you dissipating. “We were rushed.”

You nod as you chew on your lip.

“At least nobody saw us,” you say. “And if the cops check our phones, they won’t find anything.”

“Good thinking to turn them off.”

Your face creases in surprise.

“What?” he says.

“Just throws me off when you’re not an asshole.”

He scoffs, his jaw tensing. But beneath the irritation, he wishes he could undo the way he’d spoken to you when you first got in the car.

It’s like his mind is speaking a different language to him when he feels any sort of shame. He usually tries to shut it up. When he looks at you again, he decides not to.

“I didn’t mean to… threaten you,” Rafe mumbles.

“Yeah, you did,” you say with a humorless laugh. “But I’m on your side here. Don’t forget that.”

You check your phone. You have plans to hang out with the guys after work and after what you put them through a few nights ago, you’d rather not leave them hanging again.

“I should go,” you say. “My friends are waiting on me.”

“Did you tell them the truth?”

“No,” you say. “This stays between you and me only. Trust me.”

Rafe stares at you, longer than he ever has before. It’s not anger in his face. Not worry, either. It’s something new. Vulnerability.

“I don’t trust anybody,” he says.

Your lips twitch into a frown. Even though this is a man who’s relentlessly teased you for your place in the classist system he seems to worship, your heart twinges in sympathy.

“Nobody?” you ask quietly.

He looks out the window again, tense and distant. He doesn’t say anything else.

“I have your back,” you reiterate to him. “To the grave, right?”

“Yeah,” he offers, not looking at you again. You exit his car, the confusing knot in your chest only tighter now.

·········

The police start knocking on doors a day later. When they come to yours, you do your best impression of a clueless nobody who just wants to help.

The lead on the case introduces himself as Detective Brading, settling in your living room like he’s been here before. He’s so confident that it’s intimidating. You can imagine Porter’s wealthy family are doing everything they can to find out what happened. The man staring at you is likely the best of the best.

You’ve rehearsed your story so many times that it feels natural. The two men nod along as you lie to them about how you’d fallen asleep in the bedroom, how you’d woken up to him and Rafe arguing, how you convinced Rafe to leave with you.

Your parents stand close by, arms crossed. This is the most they’ve heard you speak in a long time. They hardly ever ask you anything about your life, so it feels odd to have their attention.

“We think you two might have been the last people to see him before he went missing,” Brading tells you. “Porter didn’t say anything about going anywhere?”

“No,” you answer. “Rafe and I left pretty quickly.”

The detective looks up at your parents with raised brows, asking them to give you a moment. When they leave, he leans a little closer.

“We know he dealt drugs,” he murmurs. “And we know you bought from him. We’re not interested in getting anyone in trouble for that. We just want to know what happened to Porter. Is there anything you didn’t mention about that night in front of your parents? Be honest.”

“I fell asleep because I smoked too much pot,” you say quietly, looking back through the doorway your parents left through. It’s taking everything in you not to cry as you think about why you really lost consciousness in that room. “But I only ever bought that from him. He offered other things. Like cocaine. It’s why he and Rafe argued.”

It’s what you agreed on saying, but it still feels like you’re selling Rafe out. It’d be suspicious if you didn’t tell them this version of the truth, though.

The detective nods, clearly having been told this already. Your chest twists in unease as you think about Rafe’s name in everyone’s mouth, leading the cops to him. And possibly to you.

“How close are you to Rafe?”

“We've been talking more since I started my job at the country club,” you say. “We started hanging out a little bit ago. We’re friends.”

“Do you think he would’ve done anything to Porter?” Brading asks.

You meet his eyes, swallowing hard.

“No,” you say resolutely. “I don’t.”

·········

A man is missing and possibly, at this point, presumed dead. But that doesn’t stop Kooks from wanting to party.

You’re in the passenger seat as JJ drives to the north side of the island while John B and Pope talk in the back. You’re gazing out the window, watching the landscape go from dilapidated front yards to gated communities.

You’re heading to a party that you heard about from one of Porter’s friends and the way the police questioned you earlier today is spinning in your head.

“You good?” JJ asks.

You look over at your friend, flattening your lips together. You can never tell the whole truth, but you can offer bits and pieces.

“The cops told me they think I’m the last person who saw Porter before he disappeared,” you say. You can’t bring yourself to tell them the version of the story that includes Rafe yet. They’d never believe you. They’d judge you. “It’s kind of scary to think about.”

“My money’s on that he went on a bender,” JJ says. “Sampled his own product. Maybe even too much of it.”

“You think he overdosed?” you ask.

“More like Rafe offed him,” Pope chimes in.

“Is that what people are saying?” you ask, blood cold, turning back to look at him.

“It’s what I’m saying,” he answers. “The guy’s unhinged.”

You want to defend Rafe. To say he wouldn’t go that far. But it’d be suspicious. And a complete lie.

“It’s a small island,” John B says. “It’s only a matter of time before we find out what happened.”

You hope that’s not true.

·········

You make it to the house, reminding yourself over and over that you have to live as if you believe your own lie. You want to erase that night from your memory. Erase what Porter did to you.

You chug the first drink you can get your hands on. Your friends rib you for how quickly you down it. You blame it on a rough day at work.

Soon after, you’re at the keg, not even close to buzzed yet, but desperately needing to be. Discussing Porter with the cops today, pretending like he was just a dealer you had a few short conversations with, hearing that his family is concerned for his wellbeing made your pulse spike.

Does his family know what a monster he is?

You have to correct yourself.

Was.

“Slow down,” you hear.

Rafe towers over you, his eyes on your cup.

“What?” you shout over the music and conversations surrounding you.

“You’re on your second drink already.”

You look over your shoulder to make sure your friends don’t see you talking with him.

“I don’t even feel anything,” you reply sharply.

It’s a half-truth. Your sadness and anger are weighing heavy on your soul. That vile man took away your power, but you took it back, so you hate that you’re still so rattled by what he did. You just want peace.

“And why are you keeping tabs on me?” you ask.

Rafe stares at you, his lips just slightly parted. He can lie and say he wants to make sure you’re not setting yourself up to get hammered and potentially admit to someone what you did.

But the truth is he can’t stop thinking about you. And he doesn’t like seeing that look on your face, sad and absentminded.

He knows you hate him. He wishes he could hate you back.

“I need to be sure you’re not a liability,” he lies. “And people think we’re friends now, don’t they?”

You look over your shoulder again, anxious the guys will see you. You need privacy if you’re going to continue this conversation.

“Come on,” you say, dipping your hand in his, dragging him through the crowd. His palm is warm and soft and you don’t know what you were expecting, but the way Rafe feels is the opposite of it.

You open the first door you see, stepping into a narrow closet. You shut the door and switch on a light and suddenly he’s standing right over you, all breadth and intimidation.

Your heart races from the way you’d just touched him, from the way he’s just about pressed up against you right now. Something must be short-circuiting in your brain, because the fear you used to hold for him is entirely gone.

The attraction you’ve always felt is overpowering now. You can’t make sense of your own emotions.

“I haven’t told my friends our story,” you confess.

“What?” Rafe snips, his tone low.

“I can’t handle telling them right now, okay?” you say. You cross your arms. “I just said I was with a guy. Telling them that guy was you is… They’ll be so disappointed in me.”

“Disappointed,” he repeats with a scoff.

“Rafe, think back to every encounter you’ve had with us. All you’ve ever done is insult us. I don’t even want to think about how hurt they’ll be to hear I’m friends with you.”

“Who gives a fuck?” he mutters. “We need to make sure our alibi is solid. If the cops find out your friends don’t know we–”

“I’d tell the truth,” you say. “That I was worried about what they’d think.”

“I can’t believe you.” The thought of you being concerned about someone else’s opinion is ridiculous. “Why do you care so much?”

“They’re the only family I have,” you admit. It comes out before you even realize it. You look down, sighing. “You don’t get it. You’re like… an enemy to us. They know how shitty you treat me when I’m at work. Telling them–“

“How the hell do I treat you shitty?” he interrupts.

“I know that those tips are all a degrading show of how you’re so much richer and better than me,” you say with a roll of your eyes.

“It’s not like that.”

“What’s it like, then? Charity?”

Rafe’s jaw tightens, his nostrils flaring. Charity isn’t the right word. He hides behind a forced ego, but he’s always wanted you. And through excessive tips and constant teasing, at least he can talk to you without risking the chance of you rejecting him.

You have him all wrong. He doesn’t think he’s better than you. He’s afraid you’re better than him.

“I’ll tell my friends, okay?” you say when he doesn’t speak. “But I talked to the cops today and they seemed convinced. We’ll be fine.”

“They talked to me, too. I can tell they think it was me.” There’s an almost imperceptible tremble in Rafe's voice. “Everyone thinks it was me.”

“Even your friends?”

“Yeah,” he says. If he can even call them friends. Hearing you call yours family made his jealousy flare. Envy is all Rafe ever feels. Like he’s missing the one thing that deems everyone else loveable.

But he’s hanging on how you said they’re your only family. He doesn’t have a family, either. Not really. Not one that cares about him. Maybe you understand him more than he thought.

“Well…” You clear your throat. “They can believe what they want. You can trust me that I won’t ever tell anyone what really happened.”

“Why?” he finally asks. “Why not just snitch on me, Pogue?”

“Because that night, I told you to do it and you did. The world is a better place without him in it. You did me a favor.” You uncross your arms. “And I told you to stop calling me that.”

Rafe clears his throat, giving in, remembering how you’d saved his life and offering a quiet sorry before he says your name.

It’s the gentlest you’ve ever seen him. It’s a shock to your system. You search his blue eyes in the dim of the closet as if you’re waiting for the other shoe to drop, for him to make a snide joke.

But he doesn’t. He just stares at you, his breaths shallow, and you rethink everything you thought you knew about him.

He’s violent and aggressive and condescending. But you don’t see that right now. You see a man who doesn’t seem to be able to believe that someone would want to protect him. Is that who he is behind all the bravado?

The world continues to turn on the other side of the door, music blasting, bass rattling, but time has stopped between you. He’s looking at you through low lids. Like he wants you.

You shouldn’t. Shit is already complicated enough. But what’s one more tangle in the string tying you together?

Your fingers are at the collar of his button-up, pulling him towards you, lips meeting with abandon.

Rafe kisses you back immediately, hungrily leaning into you, cupping your face. His heart is racing. He doesn’t know how or why this is happening, but he wants it so bad that it hurts.

Your mouths part and finally, you taste him against your tongue. It feels so right, like you were always meant to do this and were both too stubborn to.

His hands press tighter against your jaw. Fear floods you. You’re back in that bedroom. You pull back.

“Not so hard,” you say.

“Okay,” he whispers, his grip loosening. He stays hovering over you, nose nudging yours. “Just… please…”

You nod, tilting your head to kiss him again, his hunger for you palpable. You’re with Rafe again, not in that bedroom, but here with a man you want who listens to your wishes.

Your head is swimming with bliss as he kisses you, smelling like cologne and desire, every piece of you wanting him. Then, his hands drift down over the curves of your hips, pulling you flush against him.

And it’s too much. You’re back there again. Begging for it to stop.

“No,” you snap, both hands roughly pushing his chest.

Rafe hits the shelves behind him, his head radiating in pain from how hard he smacked against the wood.

“What the fuck?” he mutters. He was just living in a dream. Why the hell are you pulling him out of it?

“No,” you repeat breathlessly. “You can’t touch me like that.”

“Okay,” he groans. “I won’t. Jesus.”

He clutches the back of his head, wincing.

“I’m sorry,” you say, your throat raw. “I didn’t mean to push you that hard.”

“Why’d you even kiss me?” he says. “Fuck.”

“I’m sorry,” you repeat. You step towards him, trying to meet his eyes. “You can’t… I need you to ask before you touch me like that.”

His lips are glossy from the kiss, his face pinched in pain. You take a risk, gently placing your hands on his cheeks.

Rafe should be angry at you. But goddamn it, your touch feels so good that he melts. His gaze is heavy on yours, both of you breathing deeply, coming down from the sudden outburst.

“I didn’t mean to,” you repeat softly. “Just don’t take me by surprise. I can’t handle it.”

Rafe searches your face, silently asking for an explanation.

You shake your head, not having it in you to answer right now. Your goal tonight was to forget. Not relive. You pull him closer, and thankfully, he lets you.

Your lips are tender after you part, having lost count of how long you’ve been kissing.

Things just got so much more complicated. But you wouldn’t take it back. Not for a second. Nothing else makes sense right now, but having Rafe the way you always secretly wanted him is the one thing that does.

“Don’t fuck me over,” he says, a note of cynicism in his tone as his forehead brushes against yours. “No matter what happens, don’t fuck me over.”

“I won’t,” you promise.

·········

The next morning, you’re walking through the club hall towards the golf course to start your shift. You still can’t get the way Rafe’s mouth felt against yours out of your mind.

He kissed you like he’s been waiting to kiss you for ages. Like he felt lucky that he got to.

You’re about to step through the glass doors leading outside, but the sound of your name makes ice go through your veins. You know that gravelly voice.

You turn to see Detective Brading, his stare intimidating.

“You have a minute to talk?” he says.

You can tell by his tone that it isn’t a question.

to be continued

if you want notifications on when i post my fics, follow @xorafe-library and turn on notifications 💘

[salty-autistic-writer]

Buck sits on a hospital bed and looks down at his bandaged hands. Mild burns. They add to the considerable amount of smoke inhalation that makes his throat feel as dry as sandpaper. At least his coughing already got better. Buck's doctor assured him he would be able to leave soon. Too bad there's no home he can return to. 

He stares at his hands and feels … numb. It happened so fast. So fast, it almost seems like a dream. But it’s real. And everything still smells like smoke.

His loft. It’s gone.

In the middle of the night, flames consumed the walls in that scary astonishing speed he’s so well familiar with. And he couldn't stop it.

So many memories. Burnt down to ash. Buried underneath rubble. Gone.

A light knock at the doorframe makes him perk up. Buck expects to see Maddie who left to get some water and a snack. Or Chimney. Or Hen. Or Bobby. But it’s neither one of them.

“Tommy?” Buck looks up, too surprised to prepare himself for the pain he feels when he actually sees Tommy. For the first time in weeks. “What … what are you doing here?”

“I … Howie called me,” Tommy says, avoiding direct eye contact.

“Of course he did,” Buck mutters, looking back down at his hands, picking at a loose thread. Chimney. The ever-hopeful matchmaker.

Tommy clears his throat. “Are you okay?”

Buck flinches. The soft tone with which those words are spoken feels like a punch to his gut.

Are you okay? 

Okay. 

Anger wells up inside Buck’s tight chest like dark ice water, rising to the surface of his mind and fading out all the sadness. Buck glares up at Tommy. “Seriously? That’s what you’re asking about? After weeks of silence. Of nothing. You dare to show up here just like that and ask if I’m okay?!”

It’s Tommy’s turn to wince, his eyes widening slightly. “I’m sorry.”

Somehow, that only makes Buck even angrier. He knows it’s true. Honest. He knows that Tommy cares. And he kind of wishes Tommy wouldn’t. But here they are. Still care about each other way too much.

Tiredness creeps into the murky combination of anger and sadness.

“It burnt,” Buck says quietly.

“What?” Tommy asks.

“My scrapbook. It burnt. All the pictures too. The pictures I put on the fridge. And now I have nothing left.” Buck can feel the tears coming. He doesn’t want them. Doesn’t want to cry in front of Tommy. “All the memories I started to collect. They’re gone.”

I used to look at them. I used to remember the time when I thought I was finally on my way to happiness.  

“It’s all gone,” Buck breathes. And then he really cries.

An ugly sob that escapes his lips. And he hates it. Hates it so much. But he has no energy left to hide.

“Evan,” Tommy says, barely audible. And even though the sadness is suffocating him, Buck has the space for a relieved sigh. Not Buck. Still Even. And it still sounds so right … How does it sound so right after all the wrong directions their path took?

The bed dips as Tommy sits down beside Buck, hesitantly putting a hand on his heaving back. “It’s not all gone,” Tommy says.

Buck wipes at his burning eyes. “It’s not?” He asks, doubtfully.

“No. I … I’ve been collecting memories too. I can share them with you. If you want them,” Tommy says.

“That would be great,” Buck admits, trying to take a deep breath through his stuffed nose with a grimace. “Because … Because they really make me happy. The memories.”

“They do?” Tommy asks, his hand still on Buck’s back, but apparently not daring to move. “Don’t they make you … angry?”

“Not really. Sometimes they make me a little sad. Because I start to think of what could have been,” Buck says. “I start to picture all the happy memories the future might have given me.”

“But you don’t know if those memories would have been happy. What if … What if that future turns out to be so painful that you end up wishing you wouldn’t have lived through it in the first place?” Tommy asks, his voice strained. “Aren’t you scared of what you can’t know?”

Buck shakes his head. “No. I can’t live like that. The future isn’t set in stone. And as long as I think the memories I want to make are worth fighting for … Things will be alright.”

We would have been alright.  

Tommy’s hand is burning him. But when it retreats, Buck almost tells him to put it back. Maybe that’s pathetic. But he can’t find the energy to care.

Tommy is silent for a long moment. He seems lost in his own thoughts, his fingers rubbing over his jean-cladded knees in rhythmic movements.

Buck glances at him. Through a blur of his lingering tears, he suddenly realizes that Tommy looks … rough. 

His edges are sharper. The lines on his face seem deeper. There are shadows under his eyes and he’s close to growing a beard. 

And maybe that’s pathetic too, but Buck suddenly wants to hope that Tommy is feeling that same ache Buck has been feeling for such a long time now. The ache that forces him to bake. To keep his hands busy and his mind empty.

He wonders. What is Tommy doing to soothe his ache?

Buck almost asks.

But before he can, Tommy gets up. He clears his throat. “Are you staying with Maddie and Howie?”

“Yeah,” Buck says quietly. “For now. I guess.”

Tommy nods. He’s chewing on his lower lip. Lingers. Seems like there’s something else he wants to say.

And the silence stretches like a rubber band. The tension is almost palpable in the room.

Finally, Tommy says, “If I would text you in a few days. Would you read it? Would you read it all?”

“I would,” Buck says, remembering the bubbles. “I promise,” he adds.

Tommy exhales shakily. “Okay. Alright. I’m truly sorry, Evan. For the loft. And for what you lost. I can't change what happened. I can’t give the past back to you. But whatever happens, whatever you do after you read what I am going to write, I will give you everything I have. So that you can start a new collection.”

“Thank you,” Buck says, his throat tightening.

Tommy nods. He starts to walk out of the room with slow heavy steps.

Before he can disappear, Buck works up the courage to say, “Tommy. Wait.”

Tommy stops, glancing back at Buck.

“Are … are you okay?” Buck asks.

Tommy’s brows furrow with surprise, but then his eyes soften. “Honestly? No. And I haven’t been in a long time. But I am finding ways to keep the hope alive,” he says. “Goodbye, Evan. Rest well.”

And then he really leaves.

Buck stares into the void and the ache is back. But the pain has a note of hope in its bite. Maybe it’s the same kind of hope Tommy was talking about. And maybe he shouldn’t allow himself to feel it. But he can’t help it.

Apparently, his heart, even though covered in the ash the night left behind, is still convinced that the future he pictured is worth fighting for.

(AO3 Link)

[affableramen]

no nut november. when they try to unnoticeably watch you undress

ᡣ𐭩 mature themes, spicy but not smutty, pre-relationship

ᡣ𐭩 neuvillette, pantalone x fem!reader

Neuvillette

“Here, I wholeheartedly hope you’ll find them to your liking. I’m deeply sorry the rain soaked you, you must have least expected that.”

“It’s alright, though I’m soaked to the bone, I have monsieur Neuvillette taking care of me”, you smile widely at him as he hands you the bag full of clothes. The sovereign dragon had no problem flying to the nearest mall and buying you new clothes in order to replace your soaking ones. You can’t fly, but he doesn’t want you to catch cold right in front of his eyes.

You opened the bag and took a look at the clothes. They were really fancy ones, and Neuvillette’s sharp intuition guided him into the right size.

“Wow, monsieur Neuvillette they are all my size. They should all fit.”

“I’m extremely glad in that case”, he clears his throat. “I will leave you to change. I’ll wait in the vestibule.

“Of course.”

He reached the exit and closed the door behind him but a really thin hole could give a quick peek to someone who was in the room. Neuvillette was above taking that chance and did not plan on witnessing you get rid of your soaked layers of clothes—he’s already probably seen too much, given how your white tight shirt would stick to your cleavage.

He sighed. Perhaps you already started undressing. These nasty thoughts wouldn’t come off from his head and would not leave him alone. Neuvillette entirely missed the moment when he started thinking dirty of you. All this sexual stuff was so new and unlike him. But knowing that you were soaked and changing in his office made him experience the most obscene thoughts lingering on the bottom of his mind.

“Please tell me once you’re finished”, he cleared his throat. “Unfortunately we’re so busy today I cannot give you more time than I would prefer.”

“I understand”, your voice sounds louder, you must be heading right to the door. “I finished, monsieur, and I thank you so much for getting me those.”

Once you open the door you’re met with an incredibly perplexed and almost embarrassed stare.

“Do leave me a receipt, I shall cover them all.”

“Nonsense. It was a gift.”

“I’m afraid I cannot accept gifts from my employer.”

“Please do, after all I’m partially the reason you’re caught up in the rain; had I not asked you on your day off you would not have gotten targeted by unappealing weather conditions.”

“You’re too kind to me, monsieur.”

You go back to your cubicle not realising how deeply Neuvillette experienced desire to see more of you—a single more inch of your delicate skin.

Pantalone

“Here, this should be your size. You agree how this one is less tight and more comfy than your original outfit, don’t you?” Pantalone gives you a sweet smile, his eyes shut when he does so, and his long black eyelashes stand out proudly on his face.

“This should do. If I knew we had a training today, I wouldn’t wear my formal dress at the first place.”

You take the neatly wrapped training sport suit from his indigo-gloved hands and give it a quick quality check.

“This one is really well made. I truly like it.”

“Did you doubt our private tailors?”

“Not one bit, Regrator”, you turn away from him, facing the window, your skin glowing lit and bright in the face of Pantalone’s dark figure.

“Your formal tight-fit dress deserves a reward, sweetie, but you might have difficulties fighting in it.”

“I have no problem wearing the outfit you provided me with”, you say as you start quickly changing. Regrator’s interest is picked when he hears the ruffling of clothes. His ears perk up to each sound coming from you, but he stays turned away, with his back facing you.

“I’m glad if so.”

Just when what seems to be heavy fabric sound dropping onto the floor grabbing Pantalone’s attention, he swallows a heavy feeling in his throat. He knows what part of you is presumably naked right now and fight the urge to not peek. He is a gentleman, not a dog in heat.

But when you unclasp your bra to put the sport top on, Pantalone’s head slowly turns to your side. He takes a very subtle, quick look of the curve of your shoulder and arm. Your back muscles fascinate him. Afraid that you might notice him—what are you going to think?—he immediately looks away and forces a fake polite smile as usual.

“Well, how long am I going to wait? Tick-tock, my dear.”

“Have you never undressed a woman before? Surely you know it’s difficult to be quick.”

“Oh…”

The later process is surrounded by utter silence. Upon you finishing, Pantalone who has been dying every second while you were changing, says at last:

“Not bad.”

“Think so too.” You aim to the exit, but he grabs your shoulder. You’re suddenly stopped, but he immediately softens his touch and loosens his grip, his hand rubbing your shoulder as if giving you a massage. The gesture feels somehow encouraging and intimate at the same moment.

“Be careful, alright? I fancy seeing your body back in one piece.”

[bekolxeram]

Everyone decides to be sad about Tommy spending the holidays alone today. I just want to say, I hate you all. Especially @mmso-notlikethat with this post. As payback for making me cry my way into insomnia, I wrote this on my phone instead of sleeping.

By the time he knocks on the door, Tommy still has no idea what to expect. “Wear something nice, we’re celebrating tonight,” that’s the only instruction he’s received from Evan, his boyfriend once again. Tommy can’t help but smile at the mere thought of finally allowing himself to say that name.

He has a burgundy dress shirt on with a pair of light grey slim fit pants. Simple, but elegant, hopefully properly dressed for this undisclosed commemoration. March is not known for its holidays, so what’s the occasion that calls for such festivity? They did meet last March at the cruise ship rescue, maybe that was it? Or perhaps Evan is having some sort of career advancement? They’ve been back together for just a few weeks, there’s simply not enough time for Tommy to catch up on Evan’s ever so eventful life. To that, Tommy silently mourn the time they’ve lost, due to his own cowardice.

“Hey — Hey,” Evan takes a step outside of the door to greet Tommy with a quick peck on the lips. Tommy lets the younger man drag him into the loft without much reaction, because he’s still confused by the sight in front of him: Evan in his usual navy blue button up, dark jeans and… a Christmas hat?

Inside the loft is a jumble of sparkly festive decorations. To his left, he sees “Happy Birthday Tommy”; to his right, “Merry Christmas”; and deeper into the living space, “Happy New Year”.

“Jee and Mara helped setting these up,” Evan says while taking half of a roast turkey out of the oven. “This one is from Bobby. He said half a bird is enough for the two of us, if we don’t want to suffer through leftover for the next 7 days.” He then sets the tray next to some roasted vegetables and a casserole. “The casserole is from Chimney, but I’m pretty sure it’s Maddie’s recipe. Hen got you a cake. I think she said something about being sure you would like it. We can have it for dessert. Oh, and the champagne is from…”

“Eddie, because he can’t cook.” Tommy cuts in.

“Exactly!”

“Evan, what’s going on here?”

Evan steps closer, taking both of Tommy’s hands into his own, “You told me the other day that you spent your 40th birthday alone… I only realized later that you were probably on your own for the entire holiday season, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year, Valentine’s Day. I know it doesn’t come close to the real thing, but I was thinking maybe we could make up for a few key moments that we missed.” He dims the lights in the loft with a remote control and fiddles with something on the dining table. Suddenly, the whole room is lit up with colorful patterns and twinkling stars. “I couldn’t get any firework around here, so I borrowed this star projector from Christopher.”

“Oh… Evan,” Tommy sighs, eyes already hazy with tears.

“I’m not asking you to move in with me or to make major commitments. I’m not asking for anything in return at all. This is… a promise, from me to you. No matter what happens, what becomes of us in the future, I’ll be there when you need me, we all will.”

Evan says earnestly, with utmost conviction in his tone. The clarity in his eyes reminds Tommy of that day at the café terrace, almost a year ago. “I just want you to know, Tommy, you’re no longer alone.”

A few drops of tears escape Tommy’s eyes, but before he can respond, Evan pulls out a mistletoe from his pocket and dangles it over their heads.

“You have to kiss me now.” Evan says with a cheeky grin. Tommy waits no time to capture those smiling lips with his own, kissing him with all the love and gratitude in his heart.

“I love you, Evan. I’m so lucky to have you.” Tommy pulls him into a warm embrace.

“I love you too.” Now it’s Evan’s turn to tear up.

Tommy pulls back a little and asks, “hey, would you mind if we celebrate Valentine’s Day first?”

“Oh, you mean you’re interested in the Valentine’s Night activity?”

“Depends on what you have in mind.”

“Come upstairs. I’ll show you.”

[soft-persephone]

Summertime Firsts

E // MDNI // WC: 1.9k // smut, oral, semi exhibition kink, nothing too crazy //more Terry // masterlist //

AN: // prequal to my previous Terry fic. A semi origin story of sorts

The first time you got on your knees for Terry, you were anxious. 

Most guys had an expectation of how things would go when girls do this sort of thing and you were somewhat on the more controversial side of things. 

Sometimes there was an opportunity that would prevent itself to talk about it at the beginning of your relationship with a guy, and other times you might hide it for as long as you can or hopefully you could lie and pretend your way through it, especially if you knew from the jump you weren’t going to be spending any lengthy memorable time with them.

But Terry was your maybe forever guy. You could feel it in your toes all the way to the tips of your ears. 

It’s barely been a month, but you want him around as long as possible. 

“You sure you wanna do this?” He hummed rich and lowly at you. His stormy multicolored eyes swirled into dark hues of grey as he regarded you with an unrelenting gaze.

There was only so much time. 

You both were secluded to the semi private corner of shade in your best friend's backyard, Hiding from the cruel unbearing judgment  of the sun as  its invisible heat carried out its silent punishment. The evidence of it was making your clothes stick to your skin, and the dark ring of perspiration that steadily grew on Terry’s shirt around his neck, trickling down his chest as the heat urged to swallow you in the guilt of your malfeasance. 

You clenched your thighs together and suppressed a moan from bubbling its way up your throat, fighting to stay still and quiet, desperate to be good. 

You didn’t know which was worse, the absolute damning way he was looking at you or the sight of his long thick dick in his equally as large hands. 

“Ye–”

“I didn’t say you could speak.”

Your tongue darted along your parted lips, the bear was heavy on  your pores. Beads of sweat trickled down your brow, you could feel a drop threatening to fall into your eyes. 

You wanted to wipe a hand across your forehead, but you were frozen. 

Who’s wrath would you succumb to first, the sun’s or Terry’s?

“I’m kidding.” He smirked, flashing his teeth in a  big gummy smile. The action flooded you with a scorching desire adding to the heat  in the air that willed consume you. What smile that used to fill you with a comforting warmth, now fanned the flames of the unbearable heat that seared every fiber of your mortal being. 

“Come here,” he murmured, sliding his hand to the back of your neck, but you were ahead of him. 

Fighting back against your nerves, the unbearable heat, Terry’s gaze, you flatten your tongue, taking as much of him as you can in your mouth. You let your hand wrap around the rest, slowly pumping him up and down as you lathe your tongue at the underside of his dick before hollowing your cheeks.

Your glasses fogged, a travesty. 

He was thick and pretty, and you wanted to see all of it.

You bobbed your head slowly, trying to find a way to temper the heat between you, but between how hot his dick was and the heat of your own mouth adding to the budding flame you both were igiting, they fogged worse. 

“Fuck, baby.” His grip on you slackened and he slumped in his seat, causing the tip to hit the back of your throat. 

You made a muffled throaty sound, and he moaned.

You moved your head back, attempting to slide off after the shock, but Terry’s hand tightened on your neck. 

When did he put his hand back on your neck?

“No,” it was a mix between a demand and a plea, “keep goin.”

Breathing through your nose, you sucked more of him in, so his tip could hit the back of your throat this time You bobbed your head slowly. His dick felt heavenly as it slid up and down your throat. Drool, pooled in your mouth, sliding past your lips and down your face, getting all over his dick, his precum not too far behind, putting gup quite the competition with your spit.

The sounds of your mouth on his dick grew sloppier and sloppier, but you didn't stop.

“Ah ah. . .” Terry Hissed, “fuck, wait. . .”

You slid off of him with a drawn out slip, unintentional, but he was in too much of a trance to notice. 

“Why you stop?” he attempted to scold you, but it came off petulant. 

One hand was strewn across his chest, the other hanging lazily off the edge of the porch chair he was sitting in. His dicked bobbed against hislowly belly, leaking with precum and tinged an angry desperate red. 

You put your glasses on your forehead.

“I couldn't see how pretty you are.”

He rolled his jaw before tightening it and smacking his teeth.

He muttered. It was too low for you to understand. 

“I’m sorry, what was that?” you leaned in closer, batting your lashes at him innocently as you let your words brush against the sensitive sin of his dick. It bobbed underneath your ministrations.

His gaze didn't change, but you noticed how he dragged a tongue across his lips and swallowed. 

“Put them,” he leaned forward, brushing his hand against your cheek, carressing your skin softly with his thumb, “back on.”

He placed his hand underneath your chin, squeezing hard to make his point. 

Your chest rose and fell heavily as you brought your hands to the handles of your frames and slipped them back onto your face.

“Now, open that mouth back up.” He grabbed himself at the base and tapped the side of your face with it.

You were already opening your mouth for him, but apparently that  wasn’t enough for him. He tightened his grip on your jaw even more as he pushed himself past your lips, pulling your face against him until your nose tickled the hair at the base of his dick. 

He set a rigid pace as he fucked your face. 

“Why’d you go and have to make things hard?” he chided lowly. 

You looked up, whining around his dick because you couldn’t see his face. You couldn’t get a glimpse of his eyes as they surged through a storm of different colors, clouded with the heat of his desire. 

“You pretend to be a brat , but you couldn’t be more of the opposite.” he hummed.

You moaned, breathing through your nose as he wouldn't let up.

“You take. me. so. Well.” he punctuated his words with a harsh thrust into your throat. You squeezed around him, lightly gagging with each one.

“Fuck, I’m close.”

He pulled off, The sound was loud and wet as he dragged himself out of your throat and back to whatever could fit in your mouth. 

With one low drone out moan, he was spilling into your mouth. 

Burning, hot, thick, and wet.

“You did so good for me. You're amazing. Such a good girl.” Terry washed you with praise, but you couldn’t really hear him. 

Too confused on what to do with the cum in your mouth. The sun is overwhelming, and the taste on your tongue foreign. 

You were at the housewarming of your bestfriend and her husband. Not, her boo thang as he was once formerly dubbed. 

With a quick thought, you  stretched your body over the edge of the porch and let the hot sticky substance fall from your mouth, spitting out as much as you could,

You rolled your tongue around your mouth, fighting down the taste of the rest of it that lingered on your tongue and the corners of your cheeks.

Maybe you’ll get used to it, but today was not one of those days. 

Taking off your glasses, you attempted to clean them with your shirt with the parts that weren’t damp from the heat.

Now clean you turned your attention back to Terry who was suspiciously quiet. 

His usual confident swagger was nowhere to be found.

His eyebrows were wound tight on his forehead, his bottom lip poking out at a dangerously pouty level, his eyes a green and wide with shock that border lined horror.

“Is there something wrong with it? Do I need to go see a doctor?” He started worriedly, “does it taste weird?”

“Oh, Terry!” You rushed up to sit beside him. “No. . . no. . ., No,” you paused searching for the right words, but the longer you sat in silence the more he seemed to freak out.”

You wanted to avoid this conversation for as long as possible, so you’d know what to say once the time comes, but the truth is you were never going to figure out what to say. 

“I just. . don’t really. . do, that.”

“You mean swallow?!” He looked at you incredulously.

You cringed at hearing him say it out loud.

You exhaled. “I haven't done this for that many guys and a few times I can spit it out without them looking, and then the other’s didn’t really care. Those relationships didn’t last that long either, so its not something that’t high on the list of things to change or get over or whatever the fuck.” You sighed again, “it's not a big deal.”

“Well. . .” Terry started in his low velvet tone, “it's important to me.” he ended surely, looking you in the eye.

“It's important!” 

“Yes, it is.” he said seriously, not at all put off by your outburst as he apparently opened up to you about something important to him and how you were being somewhat dismissive of his vulnerability.

“He pulled a handkerchief out of long forgotten and  since thrown off, linen suit jacket and wiped at your face, occasionally dipping it into a glass of water as he cleaned you up.

“I respect your. . .feelings and. . . experience,” He said tactfully, but there are better ways to bring it up than to spit it out in front of me like you did.” he sighed and adjusted your glasses back properly once your face was clean, “ir hurts my feelings.”

You closed your eyes. 

This could not be real.

“I’m. . sorry if I hurt your feelings.” you opened our eyes, ignoring the anxious urge to roll them and make a joke because it wouldn’t get rid of the tension in any way and just make things worse.

You mutter under your breath how it's usually a dark room in your room for the  first time and he probably never would have noticed if he would have just waited until you were home. 

Terry narrowed his eyes, letting the comment slide. 

“Look, it's fine.” He said with finality, giving you pause.

You look at him, really look at him.

He brought a hand to your face, caressing your cheek randomly,letting his thumb nick at the corner of your mouth.

“I’ll get you to do it one day.” he said it wistfully, his eyes swirling into hues of a blue grey as he looked at you, but not really at you. 

“Terry?” you squinted, blinking. 

“. . .whether you like it or not.” his voice trailed off as he stared off  in thought. .  

[kawoala]

⁝ KUROO TETSURO 𝜗𝜚 boxer! kuroo 𝜗𝜚

ᰔ word count ; 851

ᰔ content warning ; profanity 、 blood 、 boxer! kuroo 、 implied rich girl! reader 、 kindof poor boy x rich girl? 、 boxer! lev 、 mention of gambling?? (yaku, what r u doing my brother?).

you’ve never been to a club like this; the people here are a stark contrast to your personality.

whereas they are dark, broody, drugged-out criminals probably raised in trailer parks and trap houses, you were raised to be a good girl with perfect grades - and to never, ever go near drugs or alcohol.

whereas the people around you are dirty, wearing clothes they probably haven’t changed in a week, you’re careful of the people around you, careful not get dirt and muck on your very expensive shirt and your very tiny skirt.

but, you fell in love with kuroo.

four months ago, when your calculus teacher had shown interest in kuroo’s horrible math grades, she’d emailed you, asking if you would be able to tutor him until his grades improved. and of course you said yes because you’re a sucker for extra credit.

and then he was charming and he was funny and he was smart - something you hadn’t expected because, well, you were his tutor. every time you had a session, he made you laugh like it was his job.

so, of course you fell in love with him. and of course you only found out that he was in an illegal boxing ring until after you had confessed to him.

which is how you ended up here; standing in a crowd of criminals, watching your boyfriend beat the shit out of one of his friends for fun.

your brows are furrowed as lev - of all people - throws a right hook, resulting in a line of blood dribbling down kuroo’s upper lip. he’s hot, that’s for certain, but this is not making you happy. your boyfriend's pretty face is getting all messed up.

you blink and then lev is on the floor, sitting with his legs bent, forearms resting against his knees. there’s a smile on his face, despite the blood oozing from his… mouth? nose? you can’t even tell.

and then your eyes drift to kuroo, who’s holding his fists up in victory. you briefly note that they’re not even using gloves, but that thought is dismissed when you lock eyes with your boyfriend.

he’s bleeding, which would make you upset if he didn’t look so fucking hot. there’s a sheen of sweat covering his whole body, shining in the overhead light. his hair is messy - messier than usual, matted to his forehead from sweat. he still has his mouthguard in, but he’s grinning wide as ever. he points to you and winks and your knees are weak.

“lev lost!” yaku exclaims from beside you, knocking you from your trance. you turn to him and tilt your head. “he fucking lost! oh my god, i just lost so much money.”

he puts his head in his hands and curses again, which only makes you laugh. you can’t believe this is a thing that people bet on. and, no offense, but you can’t believe people bet on lev winning.

next thing you know, you’re sitting on a bench in the locker room of the grimy club, bouncing your leg as you watch kuroo unwrap his fists. your eyes are glued to his hands, bloodied and bruised.

“did you have fun?”

you look up to find him staring down at you, lazy smirk on his face. “what? o- oh, um, yeah, it was…” you trail off, eyes drifting down to your now ruined shoes. you hum. “it was kind of… scary, actually.” you can hear him stop moving, so you keep talking. “watching you get hit like that? yeah, that sucked. i mean, don’t get me wrong, you looked really fucking hot, but…” you shrug, sighing.

there’s a silence that hangs in the air. you can tell he’s trying to decide if he should be funny or genuine.

“y/n,” he says slowly. his shoes come into your field of vision, but you know if you look up, you’ll probably start crying. “hey, come on, sweets, look at me.”

as soon as you look up, his hands cup your face and he leans down to press a quick kiss to your lips.

when he pulls away, he smiles softly. “i’m okay. you know that right?” you nod and he laughs, pulling you into a hug, smashing your face into his stomach. “i’m okay. you hear me, lady? i’m alright.”

you laugh now, too, pushing away from him playfully. “ugh, i hate you!” you exclaim as he loosens his grip. the smile on his face lets you know that he knows you don’t really mean it. and, of course, you don’t.

he stares at you for a moment longer before jerking his head towards the door. “come on, let’s get out of here. we can go get ice cream or something.”

“ice cream?” you repeat, raising a brow. you stand up, not even reaching his nose. “and what are we going to do when the worker sees your busted lip and freshly bruised eye, hm?”

he inhales, puffing his chest out, holding his breath. he exhales on a laugh, throwing his arm over your shoulders. “yeah, we’ll go through the drive-thru, ‘kay?”

[weirdgenetic-fuckup]

Take Me With You

A/n: I’m not even sorry he’s so cute I need to drink his unborn children in a salty cocktail

Warnings: smut, oral (m receiving), mommy kink, whiny Slash (feed gooners), if you think I missed anything let me know otherwise enjoy!

All it took was one look and you were hooked, you couldn’t even see his face but he had you.

You liked the music, a friend got you into Guns N’ Roses but you weren’t big on the scene and didn’t know them all too well. Still, the music was good so you took your friend up on their offer when they got tickets to their concert.

Front row, right at the stage. The opening band was cool, Sound Garden, but when Guns came out you were you in awe, specifically with the lead guitarist.

He took every measure to cover his face, dark glasses, a top hat pushed low, his big hair patching up the holes, but his body, those hip rolls and those skilled hands, experienced fingers. A thin layer of sweat coated him and you were ready to climb onto the stage and lick him clean.

Your friend saw the way you were eyeing him and kept making jokes, nudging you when he got close.

When the concert ended you walked out with your friend, at least you almost did. You couldn’t not at least attempt to see Slash again, so you made up some excuse about needing to go to the bathroom and snuck off.

It really wasn’t as hard as it probably should’ve been for you to get backstage but you weren’t complaining, not when Slash was so close, not when you saw him slipping a dressing room just down the hall.

You followed shortly behind, closing and locking the door behind you. You turned back around to find Slash sprawled out on the couch, fly down revealing his thick bush.

He was staring at you blankly, his hat and glasses were set on the table in front of him, giving you the first glimpse of his face, big brown eyes, bushy brows. He gave you a once over and a smile spread over his face; it wasn’t lustful, he didn’t look at you like this was some joke, like he’d ever even give you a chance, he just looked happy to see you.

“What are you doing here?” He asked, his voice was nothing like you expected, it was soft and sweet with a rasp to it from smoking.

“I, uh, I’m not too sure, honestly.” You replied. You didn’t have a plan, you had a concept: get backstage, see Slash. You never thought you’d get backstage nor did you think you’d see Slash.

Slash chuckled and gestured you closer. “What do you want to do?” He asked, that smile still on his face.

Your eyes trailed over body again, plush thighs stretching out his leather pants and expensive ostrich skin cowboy boots. “Whatever you want me to do.” Slash’s brows raised at that, of all things he hadn’t expected that, at least not worded in such a way.

He gestured you closer, tapping the floor with his boot to signal for you to sit down. You did just as he asked, kneeling between his legs. “You ever done this before?”

You’re face scrunched. “I’m not a groupie.” You said, grudgingly pulling your eyes from his happy trail.

Slash snorted and shook his head. “No, I mean, like, ever.” He said, cocking his head to the side as he took in your innocent front, doe eyes looking up at him, a nervousness to the way your lips moved and your eyes flickered.

You slowly shook your head, hoping he wouldn’t send you away. Instead he just adjusted his position and pulled his half hard dick out of his pants, stroking himself a few times.

He held his tip to your lips, smearing pre on them as a silent request for entry. You opened your mouth for him and he brought a hand to the back of your head, pushing you down on him.

“Oh, fuck.” He groaned, head falling back. “Thank you for coming back here, fuck.” He mused, guiding you to help you bob your head on him. “Squeeze your thumb, it’ll stop your gag reflex.” He said, demonstrating it himself.

He did enjoy hearing you gag on his length, choking on his girth, but this was your first time. He was content with just seeing the struggle, your throat bulging with him, eyes watering and drool beading out the corners of your mouth, trickling down your chin.

You took his suggestion and it did help, not completely but it was definitely better than before. Honestly, you didn’t mind the discomfort so long as you got to watch his expressions, his eyes closing in ecstasy, when he opened them you got to see the need in them as soft whimpers and whines left him.

He had you going slow, dragging this out. “Fuck, I don’t- I don’t even know your- fuck, mommy.” He moaned, eyes crossing as thick spurts of cum shot down your throat, he could barely keep his thighs from locking around your head.

He let go of your head, letting you pull away from him with a few good coughs. You wiped you mouth and stood up, taking a seat beside him on the couch.

Slash threw an arm over your shoulder and pulled you to his side, kissing your cheek. “You sure you don’t want to make your way through the rest of the band?” He teased.

You shook your head. “They don’t all look so pretty when they cum, do they?” He scoffed and pulled his arm back, fixing his pants and standing up.

“Alright, get out, I gotta go.” You chewed your cheek, looking him over, eyes landing on his clothed ass. He turned back to see where you were staring and laughed. “Jesus, what do you want?”

You thought for a moment, slowly bringing your eyes back to his. “I get to choose?” Slash stared at you, you wondered if he heard you at first but then he nodded. “Take me with you.” That sweet, warm smile found its way back to his face.

[witchyvibes91]

Slytherin Boys Break-up Blurb: Part 2

Part 2 of the break-up series. This one is filled with groveling and begging for forgiveness. Enjoy little stars.

Mattheo: You walked through the common room, seeing your friends smiling. 

“What’s gotten into you three?” You asked as you made your way to your dorm. 

As soon as you opened it, the heavy scent of flowers hit your nose. They were everywhere. Your favorite flower filled the room. There were petals all over the floor. Candles that casted a yellow-ish glow. And right in the middle was none other than Mattheo Riddle. 

“I am so, so sorry.” He finally said as you looked at him. You could hear his voice cracking as he spoke. It had been a rough last month without Matt but you weren’t sure you were ready to forgive him. Not yet anyways.

“Matt…” Your  voice trailed off. You were unable to form words as you looked at the transformed room. This was something Matt always did to you, take your words away. In both good and bad ways. Perhaps this was a good way.

“I know. I know I messed up and I know I don’t deserve you, believe me. But please. Please let me at least try to make it up to you, Princess.” Matt pleaded, something you never thought you’d hear before. 

You were staring into eyes when you finally noticed the little box he was holding. A red one with a white bow on it. He held it up and you walked closer to open it. Your hands shook a bit as you undid the bow and opened the box. Inside was the most beautiful bracelet with your birthstone set right in the middle.

“You know you can’t just buy me back.” You finally managed to say. Matt smirked, the smallest chuckle escaping his lips as he stared at you.

“And I’d never expect to. This is just the first of my many apologies to come. Because you, Princess, you deserve this. You deserve this and so much more.” Matt explained through that cracked tone once again. But this time it wasn’t just a crack. It was a full break. Tears sat on his waterline and you could feel your heart breaking.

You weren’t quite ready to forgive him but this was a good start. You placed one hand on his cheek as you kissed him softly, knowing that you’d give him that second chance. And you would be forever grateful that you did.

Theo: It had been weeks since your fight with Theo. Usually he apologized right away but this time you haven't heard from him. Maybe you two really were done.

You were walking through the castle when your phone went off. A text from Theo telling you to meet him in the forest. You almost didn’t but something told you to go. 

As you walked through the dense area, you saw him leaning against your favorite tree. It was the large one right next to the babbling creek. He had the faintest smile on his face as you approached him.

“What is it Theo?” You asked sternly and you saw how sad his eyes looked. There were dark circles under them. He wasn’t sleeping. You could tell.

“I can’t eat. I can’t sleep. I can’t get that stupid fucking fight off my mind.” Theo admitted after a minute of staring at you. He pointed to the tree, seeing the initials the two of you had carved into it months ago.

“I come back to this tree every day and I stare at those letters. I can’t do this, cara mia. I can’t be away from you. And I’m so fucking sorry I ever thought I could.” He admitted before looking back at you with the most solemn look on his face.

You could feel your heartbreaking listening to him. He hurt you. He let you walk out. Fuck. Maybe this was a bad idea. You shook your head as you looked at him.

“It’s too late, Theo.” You whispered as you started to talk away. You took two steps before you felt a hand on your wrist, pulling you back in. 

Your eyes shot up to his blue ones. They stared into your soul, begging for forgiveness. 

“I let you go once. I won’t ever make that mistake again.” He said firmly. He was pleading through his eyes, hoping you would just give him a second chance. He didn’t deserve it. Fuck. He really fucking didn’t deserve it. But you missed him. You missed him more than you cared to admit.

“Please, tesoro. Please just…just sit here with me?” 

And you did. You spent the rest of the evening sitting with Theo against that tree, yours and his initials carved just above your heads. Maybe he didn’t deserve this but you didn’t mind letting him talk, explain his side. Apologize. And god did he apologize. He did nothing but apologize over and over again. Maybe he’d get that second chance after all. 

Lorenzo: You still couldn’t believe the way Enzo had acted. It was months later when you finally saw him for the first time. And he looked awful. He wasn’t eating. Wasn’t taking care of himself.

Good.

You didn’t even look his way as you walked past him. The closer you got, the faster your heart started to beat. The pain and anger started to bubble inside of you once more.

“Y/n, wait!” Enzo called out to you but you didn’t stop. You kept pushing forward as your shoes squished across the courtyard grass. 

“Stop! Please, I just want to talk!” He shouted once more, now following behind you. You could feel everything boiling inside of you, not sure if you could hold it back anymore.

“Come on! Just stop!” 

That was it. You couldn’t hold back anymore. You stopped but not because he asked. You stopped because if you didn’t, you were going to boil over and explode. You turned to face him, your hair spinning around you as you whipped around quickly.

“No! You don’t deserve a conversation. You don’t deserve my attention. After what you did, Enzo? Seriously? You deserve nothing but the scum on my shoe.” You shouted at him, much to his surprise.

There was a small moment, a moment where the two of you would stare at one another with a longing–a longing for something that has now been lost into the past. 

After a few moments, you finally turned and walked away. Lorenzo watched you leave. He watched you until there was no you left. His heart was breaking, knowing he’d messed up–knowing he had lost you forever. 

Over the next few months, you received the most lavish gifts, the most detailed letters. Every day, Enzo sent you something. Even if the two of you never spoke again, it made him happy knowing he was still in your life somehow. And you enjoyed it, even if you didn’t want to admit it, you enjoyed how much he was wanting to earn your trust back. And maybe, just maybe, he would.

Draco: It had been five weeks since your break-up with Draco. The pain was still raw but you were trying your best to push through. As you made your way to your next class, you realized you hadn’t seen him much and you wondered why.

You walked into the classroom, heading to your desk before noticing a book on it. It wasn’t a book you recognized. You picked it up, feeling the black leather in your hands and noticing the pages had gold edges to them. Beside the book was a small piece of paper that had your name on it, noting the book was for you.

You opened the book and recognized the handwriting immediately. Draco. A part of you thought maybe you wouldn’t read this, shouldn’t read this. It would only hurt. 

That didn’t stop you. You started to read the words, slowly realizing what this was. The first page detailed Draco’s upbringing. His relationship with his father, his mother. All of it.

You moved on to the next one and with each new page realized he was opening up to you. Maybe he couldn’t say it, but he could write it. 

You read it until you reached the end, noticing how only half the journal was full. There were still plenty of blank pages left but each one was numbered as if it was continuing. 

“I see you’ve found my gift.” Draco called out behind you. You turned around quickly, seeing him standing there with his hands tucked into his pockets.

“Draco, what is this?” You asked, still slightly confused why he would give you something like this. He walked a bit closer, his eyes completely locked with yours with each movement.

“It’s me opening up in the best way I know you.” He stalked a bit more forward before stopping right in front of you, “You deserve that, Y/n. I was an idiot for not realizing that earlier and I’m sorry.” 

An apology from Draco Malfoy? You never thought you’d see the day.

You glanced back down at the book, flipping it in your hand before opening up to the blank pages. Draco pointed to it, the silver ring with his family crest in the middle shimmering as his finger touched the empty page.

“And the blank pages? That’s for us to use together. For our new memories. We’ll write in it every day if that’s what it takes to earn you back.” He said softly before finally moving his finger from the page.

“Draco…” You said softly, closing the book. The effort was sweet, the gesture appreciated. But you were nervous. Was this all for show? 

“I promise. I will be as open with you as I can, even if it’s through letters.” He said softly, taking his hand and wrapping it through your hair. 

How could you resist this? You weren’t going to fully cave for him just yet but this was a step. It was a very welcomed first step to getting back to what you once were.

Blaise: You hadn’t heard from Blaise in a few weeks. In fact, you hadn’t seen him at all which was shocking. Blaise was everywhere all the time or so it seemed. Not seeing him on campus was something that should cause concern.

You were walking back to your dorm one day when you saw smiling faces and little giggles in the common room. What the hell was everyone so happy about? You opened your door and there in the room stood Blaise. 

He was standing in pajamas and holding your favorite flowers. All of your favorite snacks covered the bed. Soft music played from the speaker. Your eyes went a bit wide as you tried to take everything in.

“Blaise? What the hell are you doing here?” You asked through a bit of shock. You were trying to process what was happening but it was almost too much. Almost.

“Apologizing. I’m so sorry for what I did. And I know, I know I might have lost you forever but, ma, even if I just have you as a friend that’s good enough for me.” Blaise spoke softly. You could feel your heart racing with every word.

There was something about this moment that made you think, perhaps, you would remember it forever. It wasn’t anything big or special but it was important. To you, it was important. 

“Blaise…” You said softly, letting your voice drop off at the end of his name. His eyes searched yours and he seemed to wonder if you would take his gesture.

“We can spend all day in here. Watching movies. Talking. Eating every snack the house elves could manage to find for us.” He said as his voice ran off into the smallest chuckle.

Always joking, that was Blaise. Even in the most serious moments, he could make you laugh. It was something you always enjoyed about him. He took a small step forward, still holding the flowers in his hand.

“All I need is you. No parties. No outside world. Just you. So, what do you say, ma?” He asked quietly. You thought about it but there wasn’t much to think about. What he did was wrong, yes, but this? This was a great start to making up for it. 

You walked towards him, taking the flowers and giving them a small sniff before setting them on the nearby desk. Your eyes went back to his, those dark eyes that only seemed to sparkle when you were around. 

“A day in here with you sounds perfect.” You whispered before feeling him wrap his arms around you in a hug. You hugged him back and as you did, you felt as if your life problems all seemed to disappear.

You would spend the entire rest of the day with Blaise, talking and laughing about everything possible. It wasn’t a confirmation of a restart of your relationship but it was a push forward. And Blaise loved it. Even if it was just the tiniest bit of attention from you, he loved it because, at the end of the day, you truly were the only thing that mattered. 

Regulus: It had been a year since you had heard from Regulus. There was a part of you that perhaps thought you would never hear from him again. There were rumors he died. Rumors he ran away. Rumors he joined the dark side, fighting for Voldemort. But you couldn’t believe any of it.

You knew Regulus. He would never do that. If he had joined the dark side, it was only to fight from the inside. The worst rumor was the one that he died. You couldn’t bear that thought. You would have to see him, see his dead body before you accepted that truth.

You were walking back from Hogsmeade one afternoon when you got caught in the rain. You were rushing, trying to make it back to the castle when suddenly you heard your name called out.

The voice was familiar, one that sent waves through your body. You turned around to see Regulus standing in the rain, drenched. His long and curly hair was plastered to his forehead as he stared at you.

“Reg?” You asked, almost not believing it was real.

“I’m sorry.” He replied through the rain. Your heart was racing, there was a building of tension between the two of you as you stared at him.

“I’m sorry I left you. But it’s over. It’s done.” He explained and your mind started to race with a million thoughts. He did it. He won. And he came back for you. Just for you.

You dropped your books, rushing up to him and jumping in his arms. His arms wrapped around you tightly, holding you close before he pressed his lips to yours in a heated and passionate kiss. 

“Don’t you dare ever leave me again, Regulus Black.” You said as you broke the kiss but stayed in his arms. He looked down at you with the softest smile on his face. 

“I won’t.” 

And he wouldn’t. He’d never leave your side. For as long as the two of you lived, he’d be right there. For you were the only important thing in Regulus’ life.

[sagesturns]

Maybe In Another Life

Summary: One night, you call Chris, drunk and missing him. The two of you talk, and he softly admits that sometimes love just fades, no matter how hard you try to hold on. In a quiet, painful moment, he says goodbye, leaving you with nothing but the echo of what once was.

contains: angst, weed, alcohol

One night, while you were both watching the stars, Chris noticed a moth circling a light. He said, “You’re like a moth. You’re drawn to the things you love, even if it means flying through darkness. But you always find your way back.”

The thing about you and Chris was that it always felt perfect. You were a team. A unit. Everything about the way you two fit together felt so natural, so easy. You'd talk for hours, finish each other's sentences, share stupid jokes that no one else understood. When he kissed you, it was like time stopped.

When he held you, everything felt right in the world. You were convinced it would never end.In the beginning, you never questioned it. It was just you and him, navigating the world together. This was destined to be eternal. You once had that kind of love; the kind that everyone trumpets about yet hardly understands until they live it. And at some point when you think about the future, there is no denying that he was included in it.

But somewhere along the way, you started noticing the little cracks. The things that used to matter to him—to both of you—no longer seemed to spark joy. The way he looked at you started to change. But that warmth of his touch would now be replaced by distance. And no matter how hard the effort was to bridge that distance, it only seemed to get wide…

It wasn't just like that; rather, it was a long, slow, painful awareness. He’d become distant. There were late nights, missed texts, and a growing silence between you two. But you refused to believe it. You fought it. You told yourself it was just a phase. You tried harder to make it work, to keep things the same, but he kept pulling away. The breakup came unexpectedly.

One night, when you were sitting together, trying to make sense of everything, he said the words you dreaded to hear.

“I think we should break up.”The words became the ceiling of the room, and it looked like the room started to spin You could not catch your breath. You could not move. You wanted to do something, anything—say something, do something—to make it stop. But in the end, only the silence remained. He left and you had only the whispers of the love you had thought to be never fading in return.

It was a few months later, but a dull ache remained. And it was tonight, sitting in your room by yourself, that the heaviness of it all felt more unbearable than it ever had. You’d been out with friends earlier, did what you could to distract yourself, and now you were alone. With the fog that accompanies both drunkenness and a high, you retrieved your phone seeking a escape of relief.

You scrolled mindlessly through your contacts. And your finger hovered over his name—Chris—and for a second, you paused. He hadn’t been in your life for a long time, but the idea of him acted like a magnet, a force you felt powerless against. You didn’t even think about it, just tapped his name and called. The phone rang and rang and rang until finally it was his voice on the other end, familiar and distant.

“Hello?”For a second, you didn’t know what to say. You hadn’t expected him to answer. But there he was, sounding so… normal. So far away.

“Heyyy, Chris,” you said, your voice slurring slightly. “It’s me…” He didn’t speak right away. You could practically hear the confusion in his silence. “Uh, hey. What’s going on?”

You let out a shaky laugh, trying to make it sound like everything was fine. “I’m… drunk and high,” you slurred, a small chuckle escaping your lips. “Just… missed you, you know?” “Oh… uh, okay,” Chris said, his voice quiet, trying to make sense of the situation. But there was a certain softness in his tone now. “Yeah, I figured you were… a little out of it.”

You closed your eyes, letting your head rest against the wall. You fell silent, and there was an expectant pause, which you broke with a quieter voice: “I miss you,” you said, the words spilling out ungracefully. “I miss us… I miss how we were. Why did it have to happen, Chris?”

On the other end, there was this long silence and one could almost hear him fitting together the pieces. "I don't know," he said softly. “It’s been a minute now… a year, at least.” His voice was even, but there was an inescapable sadness. A year. A whole year. It was as if it had happened the day before. How do so many years pass and you remain, its lingering echo? The memory of you two. “I just…” The weight of it all seemed to hit you all at once. “I thought that was forever, you know? We had everything. I thought we had it all.” Your voice had a small crack as you talked. "I can't figure out where I messed up." "I don't think it's about pinpointing a mistake," Chris said speaking but with confidence. "Sometimes things just… lose their spark. You can't cling to something that's no longer there even if you try your hardest. I… I believe that's what happened" You took a deep unsteady breath. "I still can't wrap my head around it" I thought we were happy. Was it just me? Did I mess up?"

“No,” he answered quickly. “It wasn’t you. But sometimes… sometimes things change. People change. And it’s not anyone’s fault.” His voice dropped slightly. “It just is.” You swallowed hard, the tears threatening to spill again. It hurt more than you thought it would. “I hate it. I hate that we’re like this. I hate that I lost you.” Chris didn’t say anything for a moment, and you could feel the space between you growing, more distant with every passing second. And then, quietly, almost like an afterthought, he said, “It’s just the high talking, you know? It’s the drunk talking.” “I know,” you whispered, wiping at your eyes. But the sadness was still there. The hole inside you was still there.

There was another long pause before Chris sighed softly, a deep, almost mournful sound. “Maybe in another life, huh?” You froze at his words. The weight of them felt like a stone sinking to the bottom of your chest. “Maybe in another life?” you repeated, your voice trembling. “Yeah,” he said quietly. “Maybe.”

The tears finally fell, but you tried to keep them in check, your breath hitching. "Why not this one?" you whispered, the words slipping out before you could stop them. Chris’s response was soft, final. “Bye, Moth.”

The call ended , and in an instant, the chat came to a close. You remained seated clutching your phone, your eyes fixed on the display as if you thought he might ring again. But the call never came. Of course, he wouldn’t. And of course he calls me my nickname… because that’s all I am now. Just a memory.

word count: 1.3k

tags: @sweetshuga @m00nl1ghts1vt

a/n: so basicallyyyy this something that happened with me..not the exact situation but smth like thatt so i decided to make it a short lil something! i wrote this half asleep, pls bare w me. anyways love you all soso much.

@sagesturns

[hoosurdaddy]

A kiss is the price to pay.

Dark!eddie munson x f!reader.

Trigger warnings: power imbalance, objectification, non consensual tension, emotional manipulation. I warned you. Your own fault if you continue.

Note: I’m not taking requests. I am just bored and haven’t been on here since forever. Idk. However this was a request I got back in like 2022-2023 or something? So credit to you

The evening at the Hawkins Fall Fair was in full swing, the air buzzing with the usual sights and sounds: the dizzying flashes of carnival lights, the deep rumble of the Ferris wheel turning, and the mingling scent of popcorn and fried dough. You had been stationed at the cheerleader's kissing booth for hours now, tasked with giving out quick pecks to random guys in exchange for five bucks, all in the name of raising money for new uniforms.

It seemed harmless enough at first—just a bit of fun, right? But by now, your face hurt from plastering on a fake smile, and your patience was running thin with every guy who lingered a little too long, or tried to sneak an extra kiss when your back was turned.

You wished you were anywhere else. Anywhere but here, stuck behind this booth, giving out kisses like they were nothing. And then, as if to make things worse, he showed up.

Eddie Munson.

You saw him lurking near the back of the line, leaning against a game booth with that signature cocky grin on his face. The one that made everyone else keep their distance, like he was some sort of rabid animal. The "freak" of Hawkins High. You didn’t have to look at the other guys to know they noticed him too. There were a few snickers, a few murmurs, and a few boys visibly shifting uncomfortably in their spots.

Eddie wasn’t the kind of guy anyone in this crowd would expect to see standing in line for a kiss from the cheerleader. Hell, even you didn’t expect him to do it.

But of course, he did.

He sauntered up to the booth with his hands in his pockets, his wild hair falling over his eyes. The smile on his face was way too confident for someone who was supposed to be the school outcast.

“Five bucks, right?” Eddie said, his voice dripping with something between amusement and challenge. He pulled a crumpled five-dollar bill from his wallet and tossed it onto the table in front of you.

You raised an eyebrow, trying to keep your expression neutral. "Yeah, five bucks for a quick kiss."

Behind you, the line of guys waiting to get their turn shifted, their patience clearly wearing thin. They muttered under their breath, clearly annoyed that Eddie had cut to the front.

"You're really gonna kiss him?" one of them scoffed. "Why don’t you just go make out with the school mascot while you’re at it?”

You could feel their glares burning into your back. It wasn’t like you cared what they thought—you weren’t the one who’d thrown down money to kiss Eddie Munson. But you could tell it irritated them. And that made you uncomfortable.

Eddie leaned over the table, his grin widening as he met your eyes. “What’s wrong, sweetheart? Too good to kiss me?” His voice was teasing, but there was an edge to it—something deeper beneath the surface.

You tried to shake it off. “If you’re not here for a kiss, Munson, you can just leave. I’m not in the mood for jokes.”

Eddie’s smirk didn’t fade, and he didn’t move away. Instead, he slid into the chair in front of you, crossing his arms over his chest. “Oh, I’m definitely here for that kiss, babe,” he said, voice low and almost too intimate. “But I think you’re gonna give me a little more than what you’ve been giving the others.”

You narrowed your eyes, but Eddie’s gaze was already hard on you. "What do you mean, 'more'?" you asked, barely holding back your irritation.

He leaned closer, his breath warm on your cheek. “A kiss for a buck is too easy,” Eddie murmured. “I saved up all my money just for this moment. You’re gonna make it worth my while.” His eyes flickered to the guys behind you, and you could see the flicker of amusement on his face. “Or maybe you’re not into making it worth anything. If that’s the case, I guess I’ll just walk away.”

The sudden idea of letting him leave, of not having to deal with the awkwardness or his incessant teasing, made your heart race. You didn’t want to kiss him, not really. Not Eddie Munson. Not like this. But the idea of making the guys waiting behind you even more uncomfortable? That… didn’t sit well with you either.

Fighting back a sigh, you leaned forward and tried to make it quick—a peck, a kiss that would make him get his money's worth and move on. But as soon as your lips brushed his, Eddie’s hand shot out and caught the back of your neck, holding you there.

You tensed, trying to pull away, but he didn’t let you. The kiss deepened, slow, deliberate, like he was savoring it. His lips were soft, but his grip was firm, his other hand resting on the table as if to steady himself—or keep you in place.

You could feel the heat rise in your cheeks, but you couldn’t do anything but brace yourself against the table, feeling his tongue slip into your mouth. A part of you wanted to scream and slap him away, but another part—the part you hated—felt a strange pull, a dangerous excitement in the way Eddie kissed you like he was trying to own you. His fingers moved to your jaw, tilting your head, forcing you to take more of him. You could feel the annoyance from the guys in line building behind you, the tension thick in the air, but Eddie didn’t care. He was lost in it, dragging the kiss out, his lips moving with a rawness that made your heart race in a way you hated.

Finally, Eddie pulled back, breathing hard, his grin wide and unapologetic. “There we go,” he said, voice smug. “That’s the kiss I paid for. Definitely worth the five bucks.”

Your heart hammered in your chest, and you quickly wiped your lips, disgusted with yourself for the way you’d allowed it to happen.

“Get lost, Munson,” you spat, the anger bubbling up now, but Eddie just laughed.

“Nah, I think you like it,” he said, voice dropping low again. “You enjoyed it more than you’ll admit. But it’s okay, sweetheart, I won’t tell anyone.”

You opened your mouth to retort, but before you could, Eddie turned and walked away, leaving you standing there, heart still thudding in your chest, hands trembling.

You didn’t know what to feel. Part of you was furious, disgusted by the whole thing. The other part of you—the part you barely recognized—was shaken, hungry for something more than just a kiss. You wanted to yell, to scream at him, but instead, you felt yourself quietly watching him leave, feeling like there was more to come. You didn’t know what Eddie Munson wanted from you, but you knew this wasn’t over. Not by a long shot.

A few hours later, as the fair started winding down, you began packing up the booth, ready to escape the night and get out of your own head.

But before you could even finish, you felt a cold hand on your wrist, pulling you back. Your heart lurched in your chest as you whipped around to see Eddie standing there again, a knowing smile on his lips.

"Did you think I was done?" he asked, his voice low, almost playful. “Not even close.”

Your pulse quickened, and for a moment, you froze. Something in his eyes had changed—darker, more dangerous.

“Eddie—what do you want now?” you snapped, pulling your wrist out of his grip, but he just stepped closer.

“I told you,” he said, voice barely a whisper, “you’re not getting away that easy. I don’t think you realize just how much you owe me now.” He let out a soft laugh, something unsettling in his eyes. "And trust me, sweetheart, I’ll make sure you pay up."

Your stomach twisted. You were no longer sure if you were angry or afraid. Maybe it was both. But one thing was certain: you hadn’t heard the last of Eddie Munson.

And that terrified you more than anything else.

[lunalaastra]

The Brothership Experience:

This was fun to draw XD Like I said, I think I’m keeping it a sketch ‘cause I think it kinda works

[aroaessidhe]

2024 reads / storygraph

A Dark and Drowning Tide

gothic fantasy romance

a folklorist is chosen as the co-leader of an expedition to find a fabled magical spring for the king, along with 6 nobles

when her mentor, the other leader, is found dead on their boat in the middle of the night, she has to figure out who did it; while continuing the mission through the wilderness and navigating the potential political fallout

and the only one she can probably trust is her academic rival, a naturalist, who she hates

dark folktales & creatures

Jewish lesbian MC

arc from netgalley! out sep 17

putting both covers here because they’re both so beautiful!! (artists: Audrey Benjaminsen, & Erica Williams)

[michi-chelle]

i finished slow damage!

[barrenceallence]

fletcher renn deserved so so so much better

[switch-bladefights]

i love idkhow…… dallon weekes the man ever…….