#was gonna let this rot in my drafts because they're not very pretty but the farm boy sure is so... here just have it lol

[lizardkingeliot]

Sam Reid in Inside Interview with the Vampire Season 2

[okifyouinsist]

tagged by @killerandhealerqueen (i just keep forgetting abt this one SIGH but i have free time rn and im committed)

1. why did you choose your url?

growing up, i just wasn't a social media girl purely bc of the fact that my parents were super strict and I assumed they wouldn't allow me to have it and I just never really saw the appeal anyways. Then later a few friends basically forced me to make my first account and because i wasn't very creative and thought i was the funniest bitch ever i made my first user 'ifyouinsist' and it just kinda stuck ig

2. any sideblogs? if you have them name them and why you have them.

nope. i fear if i had a sideblog id end up neglecting it and forget abt it or make it my new main blog and neglect this blog and this blog is literally my baby

3. how long have you been on tumblr?

well i've had an account since like end of 2019, beginning of 2020???? (im pretty sure) i didnt like use my account tho i just had it to look at other ppls blogs not my own, i only acc recently made up my blog up properly and started posting this year when it was like 2 am and i was on holiday to visit my home country and my mum and my aunts were gossiping and i was like whatever who tf cares how late i am to a fandom and the rest was history

4. do you have a queue tag?

nope, my drafts are a terrifying place and if they ever saw light id die

5. why did you start your blog in the first place?

to reblog pretty art and to compliment writers on ao3 AND on tumblr bc they deserve everything and more

6. why did you choose your icon/pfp?

logan sargeant. need i say any more???? hes my bsf in spirit

7. why did you choose your header?

loscar. LOSCAR. loscar. i am very much totally normal abt them i swear (lying through my teeth rn). they're just my everything unfortunately and sometimes i like to say the fist bump is their version of intertwining their fingers together

8. what’s your post with the most notes?

ik this bc it was the first i myself made and it was abt loscar obviously and i thought i was SO funny (im not) and its lowk still such a flop post but its MY flop post so here it is :)

9. how many mutuals do you have?

idk man im shy (scared of rejection) so i dont have a lot, like genuinely let me go see acc, oh ig its me and my 14 moots against the world i love you guys fr

10. how many followers do you have?

BYE my 26 followers are my 4 lifers fr (im such a flop this is hilarious)

11. how many people do you follow?

37 (sigh need to follow more ppl RN)

12. have you ever made a shitpost?

im gonna be so real idk what defines as a shit post but most probably yeah

13. how often do you use tumblr each day?

idk im acc really inconsistent like ill be MIA for 2 whole days and the next week ill be on tumblr like for most of my day when i can its very confusing like today ive not been on it a lot im academically locking in and all that

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once?

ummm no. like. if i see someone i follow getting hate ill send them a supportive ask and then at the end of it be like anon ur such a loser get a life but other than that. nope.

15. how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ posts?

im very much neutral abt them, like idc if i need to reblog it yk if i want to i will if i dont then i wont

16. do you like tag games?

YES (said in a very normal voice)

17. do you like ask games

YES. i love getting asks id cry if someone sent an ask (i have one rotting away from a moot rn i WILL answer it i swear)

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

can i say all my moots. i wanna say all my moots they're all famous in my eyes guys, i start tagging its gonna end with all my moots being tagged but like @killerandhealerqueen and @dwarvenchords were the first 2 ppl to come to my mind theyre both just the coolest fr

19. do you have a crush on a mutual?

nah. i have FRIEND crushes on literally all of them tho. wanna be their friends SO bad

20. what is the last song you listened to?

Mamichula- Bizarrap

21. what are you currently watching?

in my docuseries era rn watching breakpoint (STILL)(i only have time on the weekends rn SIGH)

22. sweet/ savoury/ spicy?

sweet. im such a 'lets skip the dinner and just get dessert' kinda girl

23. what is your current relationship status?

this is SUCH a complicated question to answer but heavily leaning more towards single

24. what is your current obsession?

sports. like just sports in general. like ive always been a casual fan of sports but i never used to take a deep dive into it but this year i decided to dive, and i dived VERY deep, so like motorsports, tennis, football, cricket, trying to get into hocky rn im collecting them atp. also. documentaries. like when i get time ill be binge watching like 5 documentaries i just love them sm

25. what are nine albums/ songs you've been listening to lately?

wish i could tell you fr, i mean, rn im re listening to SOUR by Olivia Rodriguez AGAIN bc thats the way my life is going SIGH, Olivia is my favourite basic artist fr, nothing compares to listening to SOUR for the first time in 2021

ANYWAYS, thanks again for the tag i really appreciate it, im gonna tag @ezisregrettinglifedecisions @fabeong @whatssthepooiintt

[izzielizzie]

Hi I have a request, but it's VERY au, but I've been thinking about it for a long time. So it's basically this: Maeve and Phoebe are best friends during the OOUIN time, I guess, and Maeve tells Phoebe about her cancer symptoms and her crush on Luis and they're at Brandon's funeral and they sit at a hidden place and Phoebe talks about Maeve's cancer and how she needs to talk to Luis and Addy, Kris, Nate, Cooper, and Luis hear. I think it would be interesting! Thanks love ❤❤ (love ur writing btw!)

ooo wow I love this idea, I’m going to pair this with another one-shot request I got where Brandon Weber is Mr. and Mrs. Rojas’ godson because they know Brandon’s parents, so basically Maeve is forced to go to the funeral to support her parents and because Brandon was her god-brother. Maeve and Phoebe are childhood best friends in this, like you suggested. Enjoy! Also this is the first time I’ve written from Phoebe’s pov so if the narration goes flat for a little while, it’s because I’m still trying to get a hang of her. Also Phoebe is being very sneaky in this fic, sorry, I like, ran out of ideas at some point. Okay I also read this over like two seconds ago it’s been in my drafts for forever basically, and I hate it but also kind of don’t? so let me know what y’all think. 

“Wanna get away?” Maeve whispers in my ear as I sidle up next to her. She looks cute today in a short black dress and leggings, and her hair is down for once. Although maybe noticing that someone looks cute at a funeral is socially unacceptable. 

“Sure,” I say as her hand slips into mine. I squeeze it once, our childhood code word for “are you okay?” that was invented when I visited Maeve in the hospital. She squeezes back with three quick squeezes: not really.

We’re standing between the church pews waiting for the funeral to start. Maeve’s been standing with her parents and Mr. and Mrs. Weber. and she looks so bored it’s actually amusing. 

“Mom, we’re gonna find seats,” Maeve whispers into her mother’s ear. 

“Sure honey,” Mrs. Rojas says absentmindedly patting the top of Maeve’s head. Maeve makes a face. “Oh, hello Phoebe dear,” Mrs. Rojas says wrapping me in a one-armed hug. She’s practically my second mother after having known her since I was three. 

“Hi,” I manage to say back before Maeve yanks me out of the aisle and down the pews to one of the doors leading to the balcony. We pause for a moment, look around, and push through the door when we’re positive no one is watching us. I don’t need to know where we’re going. Maeve and I found the perfect alcove for hiding a long time ago: on the upper part of the balcony on the same side as our family’s pews, where we can see all of the churchgoers, but they can’t see us. It’s saved us from many boring church services.

“I hate it here,” Maeve says once we drop into our usual seats. Maeve scrunches down until all I can see is the top of her head and her feet that she’s propped onto the bannister.

“Of this I am aware.”

Maeve holds her hand up and I take it in both of mine. Hers are too cold. I was honored when Maeve chose me out of all of her friends to tell me about how worried she is about her cancer coming back, but now I’m scared I’m gonna lose her every time I look at her. She’s withering away in front of me and there’s nothing I can do. “Wake me up when this is over.”

“Okay,” I say. The funeral itself doesn’t start for another twenty minutes, and Maeve spends the entire time with her head on my shoulder, her eyes closed. I’m not sure if she’s sleeping or pretending, but I squeeze her hand in mine and lay my head on top of hers. I’m drifting off too when I feel someone tapping my shoulder. I turn to see not only Addy Prentiss standing over me, but Cooper Clay, Nate Macauley, Luis Santos, and Cooper’s boyfriend Kris too.

“Hi,” I whisper.

“Is she asleep?” Addy asks, reaching forward to tentatively run a hand through Maeve’s hair. I glace up at her, and catch sight of Luis looking at her with that longing look he reserves for only her. I love Maeve with my whole heart, but even I have to admit that running out after their kiss was a jerk move. 

“Very,” I confirm.

“She’s so adorable,” Addy whispers as she drops her hand to her side. “We’ll sit back there so we won’t wake her.” She says, waving to the seats a few rows back. I nod as Maeve stirs against me.

“I know,” I whisper back with a nod as Addy steps away. Before I can think much of it I call Nate’s name. 

“Yeah?” He asks, looking at me weirdly.

“Bronwyn’s not here?”

Nate shakes his head. “She couldn’t get a plane here fast enough. Why?”

I shake my head, pursing my lips. I want to tell him and all of Maeve’s friends about her cancer so badly, but I can’t betray Maeve’s trust. She’s been my best friend for thirteen years. I’d be lost without her. 

“I hate funerals,” Maeve mumbles to me a moment later when the priest’s microphone screeches so loudly Maeve startles out of her slumber. 

“I know babe.” 

“God I can’t believe he’s gone,” Maeve says. She shifts a little, her right foot slipping down the banister. 

“Neither can I.” I’m hyper aware of the people behind us even though they probably can’t hear us, and I really hope Maeve doesn’t bring up my relationship with Brandon.

“I feel bad for my parents. I mean, god to lose your godson.”

My head snaps towards Maeve, who’s staring up at the ceiling. “I forgot about that. Jesus, I just called your godbrother an asshole. I’m so sorry.”

Maeve raises an eyebrow at me. “I hated him Phoebe. I just feel bad for saying that about him now that he’s not...” Maeve trails off.

“With us because of illicit activities?” I offer.

Maeve smiles. “Let’s not make it sound like he was a cult sacrifice Lawton.”

For some reason, that makes me double over laughing. Maeve sits up and shakes me. “Shut up someone will hear us.” I wave Maeve away and sit up. 

“Okay, okay, sorry.” 

Maeve smirks at me as she slides back down in her seat. I glance behind us and see Addy holding onto Cooper’s arm as she laughs. I catch her eye, glance down to make sure Maeve isn’t looking at me - she’s not - and then point to Addy, tap my ear, and then wave at Maeve and I. I’m trying to ask if they can hear us, but I must look like a madwoman. Thankfully, Addy understands because she nods vigorously. I give her a thumbs up and turn back towards the priest as he lists off Brandon’s virtues. None of which he actually possessed. 

I bite my lip as I contemplate my next words. Maeve doesn’t know that anyone’s behind us, and asking her about her cancer and her crush on Luis would be deceptive. But I also know Maeve. She’ll never talk about those things unless pushed. 

Oh what the hell? You only live once and all that crap. 

I start off with a logical question:��“Are you gonna miss him?”

Maeve turns to me. “Who? Brandon?”

“Yeah, I mean he was your godbrother.”

“And?”

“And you’ve always wanted a brother, right?”

“I’ve wanted an older brother Phoebe. Not a jerk who pushed me into a pond, poured coffee onto my lap when I was wearing shorts, and called me Cancer Girl for like, three years.”

Ouch. When she puts it that way, my question was pretty dumb.

“Right. Well, it’s too bad you don’t have an older brother that’s nice. Not that Brandon would have counted anyway, he’s younger than you.”

Maeve gives me her you’re such an idiot look. “Um, Phoebe, have you met Nate?”

“I have,” I say.

“Then you’ve met my older brother.”

“Right. Sorry, I should have remembered that.”

“Mhm.” Maeve goes back to staring at the ceiling, and I glance back to Addy and co. Addy’s mouthing “awww” at me with her hands over her heart, and Nate’s smiling a little at the back of Maeve’s chair. Oh yeah they can hear us all right. 

“Too bad Knox doesn’t have older brothers,” I say.

“Why?” Maeve asks.

“Because then they would have been like your brothers when you dated him.”

“I suppose so.”

“Luis has an older brother.”

Maeve’s still staring at the ceiling, so I risk a glance back behind me. Addy’s grinning at me and Luis is rolling his eyes. 

“So?” Maeve asks.

“So if you dated him, Manny would be like your brother.”

Maeve rolls her eyes. “Good to know,” she says in her end of conversation voice. 

“I know right? You could ask him out you know.”

“No.”

“But Maeve why not?”

“No.”

“Maevey.”

“No.” 

I can’t stand seeing Luis’s disappointed face, so I don’t turn around.

“Okay, give me one reason why you shouldn’t date the very kind, very handsome, and very in love with you person, who would say yes in a heartbeat.”

Maeve looks at me, her eyes searching my face. “It would be unfair,” she finally says.

“To who?”

“To whom,” she corrects, sounding and looking exactly like Bronwyn. 

“Right, that.”

“It would be unfair to Luis. Because I’d be dating him under false pretenses.”

“What?”

“False pretenses Phoebe, it means-”

“I know what it means, I just don’t understand what you mean.”

“Because I’m dying.” 

Wow okay. I pause for a moment. I glance behind me to see five equally stricken faces. Looks like Maeve really didn’t tell anyone other than me. 

“But Maeve you don’t know that. because you won’t tell anyone.” My voice rises with frustration and I’m scared I’ll start yelling and won’t stop. I’ve had weeks of pent of fear and anger inside of me, and the fear of losing my best friend is the straw that might just break this camel’s back.

“God, Phoebe, stop yelling. And I do. I mean, I’ve had every symptom except joint pain.”

“Well that’s good,” I say sarcastically. “We’ll just wait for you to rot and die and if your joints start hurting along the way we’ll consider telling someone.”

Maeve stares at me. “Don’t you dare tell Phoebe Lawton.”

I’m too angry to think about the consequences when I wave dramatically behind us. “I didn’t need to babe. You did it for me.”

Maeve sits up, turns around so quickly I’m afraid she’ll get whiplash, sees Cooper, Kris, Addy, Nate, and Luis sitting behind her, sighs, and slouches back in her chair. 

I’m taken aback. “You’re not gonna yell at me?”

Maeve doesn’t answer, her hands over her face. Fear surges through me and I lean forwards to take her arms and shake her. “Maevey, Maevey are you okay? Please don’t be crying.”

There’s a cry of alarm behind me, and within an instant, Nate and Addy are on Maeve’s other side. 

“I’m not crying,” Maeve mumbles, her voice angry but resigned as she pulls her hands away to reveal her bloody nose. 

Nate’s pulled a napkin out of his pocket before I can even realize what’s happened. 

“Where are your parents Maeve?” Cooper asks urgently. He, Kris, and Luis have joined us.

“Downstairs.” I glance down to see the procession leaving the church. I catch sight of Mrs. Rojas’s red curls in the sea of black. 

“Hurry they’re leaving,” Addy says urgently, but Cooper’s already gone. I turn back to Maeve as she sobs into Luis’s shoulder. Fear surges through me causing my heart to thump and my head to hurt until Mrs. Rojas arrives with Cooper on her heels. 

The next hour and half is a blur. I’m in the waiting room of Bayview Hospital next to Addy. My head is on her shoulder and she’s stroking my hair. “She’s gonna hate me,” I say, staring at the wall.

“She’s not,” Addy says.

“Yes she is.” I insist. 

Cooper puts his hand on my knee. “You did the right think Phoebe. Maeve knows that.”

“I hope so. But if she doesn’t die, I’m gonna kill her. Did she really expect me to be able to keep a secret like that?”

Nate shakes his head. “That’s Maeve for you.”

I smile at him. “It’s cute she thinks of you as a brother.”

Nate gives me a half grin. “She’s been my little sister from the moment I had an actual conversation with her. I’m just glad she feels the same way.”

“She talks about you a lot. Well, all of you. You mean a lot to her.”

“Glad to hear it,” Luis says darkly. He’s thinking about their kiss, I can tell. 

“Especially you,” I say to him. “She’s just scared of hurting you. Give her time.”

“Time for what?” Maeve asks as she walks into the waiting room behind her mother. 

“For admitting you’re in love with Luis.”

“Right,” Maeve says. She looks too tired to be embarrassed. “Want to sleep over Phoebe?”

“What? You don’t hate me?”

Maeve smiles. “I could never. I needed a push, and you knew it.”

“Well thank god I thought I’d have to start asking Emma for rides to school.”

Maeve rolls her eyes at me as we all stand and walk towards the exit. “Love you Maevey Laevey” I say, using my childhood nickname for her as I throw my arm around her. 

“Back at ya Phoebe Jeebies.”