#was gonna go to the beach but the migraine i woke up with said otherwise

[lewmagoo]

good morning my loves 🥰 i’m about to head to a cute coffee shop and enjoy my morning. i hope y’all have a good day!

[wefoundloveunderthelight]

Void of Extinction by GleefullyCaptainSwan

Chapter 4/9

Read on AO3: | Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4

Or on FF

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Chapter 4: It’s Always You

The loud sound of a lock clicking across the room, before a screech of the heavy steel door opening, woke James from his sleep. Mary Margaret entered his room, a smile on her face.

“Good morning, are you hungry?”

He stared at her with apprehension. “Bloody starving. Do you feed your prisoners here or just taunt them with talk of food?”

“Killi…James, you are not a prisoner here.” She said with a smile.

“The lock on the door says otherwise.”

“I apologize for that. The others were feeling anxious that you might leave before we had a chance to help you.”

“I don’t feel much like I’m being helped right now.”

“I’m sorry about that. Please, let’s get you some food and maybe we can talk about how I can help you.”

He followed her through the busy halls, people moving all around them as if they had business to tend to. “This is quite the operation you’re running.”

“Everyone who is here believes in our cause.”

“Which is?”

“Removing the threat that the Collective brings to the people of Storybrooke, helping those afflicted with this terrible disease, keeping the Hive from poaching the little resources we have, and finding a cure that can be shared across the realms.”

“That’s a lot to manage, but do you really think you can find a cure?”

“I do, but we can’t block ourselves off from the world, the wall and exile have removed our best options for finding the one thing that could save us all.”

James watched the woman’s face, the sincerity of her words, had he not been a cook, had he been more of a courageous man, he would have been inclined to volunteer and support their cause.

They entered a large room and judging by the contents he assumed this was their cafeteria. “Please, make sure you get something to eat. We can talk more once you get settled. I just need to check on a few things.”

She excused herself and James walked to the line, scoping out what kind of food they would have so far from the town’s resources. What he found surprised him, fruits and vegetables seemed to be bountiful, the array of meats astounded him even more. Where were they getting all this food from?

He put a few items on his plate and found a spot in the corner of the room to watch his surroundings. He had expected the army of the Resistance to be made up of angry men and women, soldiers in a battle that was trying to destroy the quiet town of Storybrooke. Instead, he found mothers, children, uncles, unassuming men, and women who no more looked like soldiers than he did.

He barely had time to finish his food before his attention was drawn to the crying sounds of a child coming from the entrance of the cafeteria. The sound was followed by the entrance of Ruby, who he had met earlier, and the man who had continued to seek him out at the diner. He stood from his spot on his bench as soon as the man recognized him, his eyes wide with either shock or relief, he couldn’t tell.

Behind him a woman stepped forward carrying a child, her blonde hair had been pulled back into a tight ponytail but there was no denying this was the woman who had been haunting his dreams every night. Their eyes met, and she handed her child to the man beside her, rushing toward him.

“Killian, oh my God, you’re alive!”

He flinched as she reached for him. “I’m sorry, lass, do I know you?”

She paused. “It’s me, Emma.”

“I must apologize if I have met you, but I can’t quite remember where. My name is James Rogers.” He held out his hand and she simply stared at him.

“I can’t believe he did this to you; Neal is going to pay for this.” She growled before reaching out, her hand touching his cheek.

The moment her palm touched flesh he felt like he had been struck by lightning. White light blinding him as he fell to his knees, images coming in quick succession.

“My name is Emma Swan and I need your help.”

“How can I help you, love?”

“I have information on the Collective, I need to get information to Merlin.”

“I work for the Storybrooke PD, I can take you in, get you in touch with my boss.”

“No, the information I have has to go directly to Merlin. I need to get into the mainframe.”

“The only terminal that goes directly to the mainframe is in the Mayor’s office, I could talk to her for you.”

“You can’t do that. Please. You can’t trust the Mayor.”

Killian’s heart was racing when his eyes finally opened, staring up into a sea of concerned green eyes.

“Killian, are you alright?”

He pushed away from her, backing up against the wall. “Stay back.” He warned, trying to understand what had just happened to him, the migraine starting to build at the back of his skull. He grabbed his head, tears forced out of the corners of his eyes.

“I’m sorry, what’s wrong.” The woman responded, leaning toward him. He pushed away from the wall, backing up toward the entrance.

“Just stay over there. Don’t come close to me.” He yelled, backing away from the group staring at him before running down the closest hall, pushing his way past anyone standing in his way. He could hear voices behind him, but he couldn’t stop, he needed air, he needed to get out of there.

He found himself at the end of the hallway, turning in all directions as he started to feel cornered. To his right he saw a steel door, pushing against it, it opened outward, leading to a stairwell. He climbed quickly, racing up the stairs two at a time until he found another door. He pushed and felt it budge, but the door didn’t open. Taking a few steps back, he kicked at the large door, as it flew open, fog enveloping him from the outside.

Stepping outdoors, he took a deep breath, choking on the smog as he shut the metal door behind him. He spun in place looking at the area around him, steel planks extending in all directions.

He picked a direction, sprinting to the end of the plank, he could hear voices behind him, calling toward him. He did the only thing he could think of, he dove. The ice-cold water hit him like a ton of bricks, he had to force his limbs to move, breaking the still waters with his strokes. Looking around he tried to get his bearings, unable to see anything but the fog, he pressed forward, swimming as fast as he could as he pushed through the murky waters.

When his foot hit ground, he drug himself onto the shore, crawling up the sandy beach and flipping onto his back as he tried to slow his breathing. He was able to stumble through, finding his way out of the foglands, a crack in the wall large enough for him to fit through so he could venture back to his apartment.

He crept through the dark hallways as he approached his door, surprised to find it sitting on its hinges as if someone had forced their way inside. He paused, peering into the darkened apartment, the door creaked loudly as he pushed through the archway, his apartment sitting still and ominously quiet.

“Lights.” He spoke into the void as one of the lamps turned on in the farthest room. The lights in the living room stayed dark. “Lights.” He said more forcefully.

A light clicked on beside him, a dark figure sitting in the chair by the window. “Hello James.” The voice caused the hair on his neck to stand on end.

“Who are you?” He asked, stepping backwards toward the door.

“I suppose it’s a good sign that you don’t remember me.” He chuckled. “Where’s Emma?”

James sucked in a breath at the mention of the woman’s name he had just escaped. What was it with this damned woman?

“I don’t know anyone named Emma.” He said honestly and the man stood from his spot in the room, walking slowly toward him.

“I wish I could say I believed you, but your reaction makes me think otherwise.”

“I don’t know who you are talking about.” He pleaded as the man raised a gun in his direction, James glanced around the room for anything he could use as a weapon.

“Maybe.” He paused. “You still taking your medicine, James?”

Who the hell was this man?

“Get out of my apartment, I think you’ve mistaken me for someone else.”

“Oh, trust me, I know exactly who you are, and I know exactly what you’ve done.” He lunged forward, grabbing him by the arm and pulling him toward him, the gun protruding into his side. “You’re gonna pay for what you did to Emma.” He grunted, turning suddenly, and hitting him in the head with the butt of the gun. James felt blinded for a moment as his full weight crashed into the wall.

James stood and charged the man, using his shoulder to tackle him to the ground, the gun clattering off into the corner of the room, he hit the man with the ball of his fist, connecting with his jaw with a loud crack before the man returned the punch, knocking him backward and onto the coffee table behind him.

Suddenly there was noise at the other end of the apartment, a gun shot rang out and the assailant crashed through the window onto the stairwell. Will ran past him, rushing to the broken window and peering into the darkness.

“Dammit!” He cursed as he pulled himself back into the apartment. “Neal’s gone.” He turned toward Ruby and then looked down at James. “You could have gotten yourself bloody killed running like that.”

“Who the hell was that and why was he in my apartment?” James asked angrily as he stood, wiping his bloody hands on his jeans.

“That’s Neal Cassidy, but you already know him, you just don’t know that you know him…” His brow furrowed. “Bloody hell, how much longer until void man becomes himself again?” He asked the woman who frowned.

“No one knows, we’ve never taken anyone off the injections for this long before. It’s dangerous. I’m surprised his head hasn’t exploded yet.” She said with a shrug that made his skin crawl.

“My head might explode?” He shouted incredulously.

“Probably not. I mean…I hope not.” She said, trying to sound reassuring but only giving him more reason for concern.

“Look, I get it, you’re confused, but you need to trust us.” Will argued. “If you don’t, Neal and his family are going to kill you and if that happens, they’re going to get to Emma.”

“Why is he so angry with me? What does he think I did to this Emma woman?”

“Ah bloody hell, it’s not my place to fill in those gaps for you. Let’s just say he doesn’t like to share his toys and you took his favorite one.” Will laughed.

“Toys, what the blazes does that mean?”

“Look, if you come back with us, maybe you’ll let Emma explain.”

James looked at Will and Ruby, neither who appeared menacing or out to get him, he turned toward his living room window that this Neal Cassidy has thrown himself through. That man definitely was not out to help him. He didn’t see any other choice at the moment, he could stay here, and this man would continue to come after him and most likely kill him for causing some sort of harm to someone, or he could find out why this woman he didn’t even know was real, was suddenly haunting his dreams.

“Fine, let’s see what this Emma woman has to say.”

~*~

Emma paced the small room that Ruby and Will had left her behind in, Henry sleeping soundly in the corner of the room. She had waited so long to see Killian, to touch him, to tell him how much she loved him. They had looked everywhere for him, at one point, Emma had reconciled that Gold had killed him, but then Will found him, hope had not been lost, but he rejected them. It had broken Emma’s heart, she thought she would never have a chance to get back what she lost and then she walks into the damn Resistance and there he was, eating a sandwich in the middle of a goddamn cafeteria as if he hadn’t a care in the world.

When he recoiled from her touch, ran to get away from her, it was like losing him all over again. She had to remind herself that he didn’t know her. Gold, and Neal, she cursed to herself, had taken everything he held dear away from him, his memories, his life, her. She hadn’t been certain that Neal had found out about Killian, that he was on to what she was doing until he she found out that he was living a new life, with no recollection of who he was. She knew if Neal determined that he was a threat and removed him from the playing field, then he must know what Killian meant to her, to the entire operation designed to destroy his family.

“Did you get anything to eat?” Emma turned toward the door as the dark-haired woman approached.

“I did, thank you. Have they come back yet?”

The woman shook her head. “Not yet, but don’t worry, Ruby is my best tracker. If anyone can find him, she will.”

Emma sighed. “He didn’t know me.”

It was the woman’s turn to sigh as she entered the room. “He means a lot to you, doesn’t he?”

Emma offered a soft smile. “He means everything. I thought I could be strong enough as long as I had him by my side, but now…”

“You don’t seem to me the type that needs a man at her side in order to be strong.” She chuckled. “Don’t get me wrong, we will do everything we can to try and return his memories to him, but don’t think that just because he doesn’t fight by your side right now that you can’t be strong.”

“I wish I had your optimism.” She laughed.

“It’s less optimism and more of an understanding.” She replied, sitting down next to her. “My husband, he’s a good man, but he doesn’t understand this fight, he’s so determined that following the law, doing things legally is the only way to solve the problem.”

“I’m guessing he doesn’t support your cause.”

“He thinks I get up every day, clean the house, do the shopping, and prepare him dinner before he gets home, that I turn my back to what is happening outside these walls. He has no idea that one day I just woke up and knew I had to take a stand.” She exhaled. “David tries to walk the line between his duty as an officer to our town, his loyalty to the Mayor, and doing what is right. One day there will be a reckoning and he will have to choose a side. I hope that he chooses mine, but if he doesn’t, I know I’m strong enough to finish this fight.”

“Wait, your husband is David Nolan? He’s Killian’s partner.”

She laughed. “Yes, the elusive Killian Jones. The Mayor is very interested in finding him, as is my husband. My husband says he’s been missing for weeks; I’m guessing that has to do with you?”

“He was helping me with something, protecting me, I uh…” She frowned unsure whether to share any more information with the woman. “My ex is Neal Cassidy.” She added, turning away from the woman.

“Neal Cassidy, as in the son of the man who runs the Gold Collective.”

“That same asshole.” She joked.

“Very interesting.” She said, staring off in the distance. “I know you are still trying to decide if you trust me or not, I can see that much. But I think we are on the same side here. I just want what’s right for our people. I want to ensure we have a future to protect.”

Emma eyed the woman, sizing her up as she examined her. “Look, I just need you to find a way to get Killian to remember, after that, we’ll talk.”

“Fair enough, Emma.” She said with a nod just as Will rushed into the room.

“We found him.”

Emma jumped up from her spot. “Is he ok?”

“Neal was waiting for him at his apartment.” She started to panic. “He’s fine. Neal got away though.”

“Where is he?”

“Med bay,” He grabbed her as she started to rush out the door. “He’s fine, just some cuts and bruises. He wants to know why Neal’s so pissed at him.” He laughed. “I told him there was no way I was explaining that crap to him.”

Emma smiled. “Thanks for not trying.” Emma looked back at Mary Margaret.

“Go, I’ll be there in a minute, I want to talk to the doctors about his condition.”

Emma walked quickly through the halls, trying not to rush and push anxiously through the people around her. She turned the corner just as Will was opening the door to the med bay and she could see Killian sitting on a bench, his face bruised, dried blood gashed on his forehead. Emma felt her heart stop the moment he looked up, his eyes meeting hers with trepidation and a nervous hesitancy.

She slowed her steps, not wanting to appear too eager to approach him, hoping he didn’t notice the way she wrung her hands at her side, her fists balling in anger the closer she got to him, as she took in the damage that Neal had done to him.

She sat down a few feet from him, not wanting to encroach on his personal space this time, she had watched in terror at the last meeting as he ran from her, fear in his eyes after she touched him. Whatever Gold had done to him, had removed the trust and love they had once shared. She would not give up; she knew that what she and Killian shared went deeper than a few shallow memories. They couldn’t take away his soul, Killian was in there somewhere.

“I’m gonna go check on Henry.” Will announced uncomfortably from the door. “Message if you need me.” He said quietly to her before shutting the door.

She turned nervously toward Killian. “Are you alright?”

“What, this?” He pointed to his forehead. “Just trying out a new look, I assure you I’m perfectly alright.” He laughed and Emma felt her entire body crave to touch him. The man she loved was still in there, his way of putting her at ease, showing her that everything was going to be fine.

“I know this must be confusing for you. I’m sorry. I never meant for any of this to happen.”

“I would assume as much; it all seems a slight excessive compared to what I’m used to.”

“You have no idea.” She laughed, the feeling of dread easing a bit in her mind.

“So I’ve been told.” He answered softly, his eyes suddenly glancing down at his feet. “This Neal…” He let his name hang in the air between them for a few moments. “He implied that I had done something to you. I wasn’t sure what he meant. I didn’t…” He exhaled, touching his finger to the top of his earlobe, a gesture that Emma had seen him make a thousand times before and it made the tears spring to her eyes. “I didn’t hurt you did I?”

She slid closer to him, tentatively reaching out and touching his hand. He flinched but he didn’t pull away this time. “You could never hurt me Killi…James.” His shoulders sagged and he let out a sigh of relief.

“Will said that I took something from him, some toy.”

Emma laughed, that sounded like something Will would tell him. “Neal is my…” She frowned. “ex.”

His eyes went wide for a moment, his lips pursing and his jaw suddenly tense. “You dated that fellow? He’s very…charming.”

She laughed, “You can be honest, he’s a real ass.”

“I didn’t want to offend.”

“That’s new.” She said with a wink. “Sorry, I’m just use to your usual sarcastic commentary.”

He smiled and then cleared his throat. “So, this thing that I took from Neal, it’s not a thing at all is it? It’s more personal…”

She nodded, “Verypersonal.” She responded, her tongue swiping out to wet her lips.

“Am I to believe that this person you think I am, this Killian, that you and he were…close?”

She bit her lip, her fingers languidly rubbing a circle against the skin at the top of his hand. “Extremely.”

“I see.” He said with a gulp. “I’m starting to wish I were this man you think I am, sadly, I have my doubts.”

~*~

“I promise you; we’ll figure this out.” She turned his hand in hers, taking his palm against hers and squeezing. “I know this isn’t easy for you, but I’m asking you to trust me.”

“Try something new darling, it’s called trust.”

The memory hit him sharply and he closed his eyes as the pain spread.

“I’m sorry, are you alright?” She dropped his hand, moving slightly away from him, clearly not wanting to cause him pain.

“Aye.” He said, opening his eyes as he squinted into the room. “Sometimes I see things…”

“See things?”

“Flashes, like a movie in my brain. Things I can’t explain, or conversations I’m certain I’ve never had. But one thing…” He inhaled deeply. “One thing is always the same.”

She leaned forward, touching his arm lightly and he turned toward her, his blue eyes shining with fear. “What?”

“You, love. It’s always you.”