#wanted to get these ideas out there so itll motivate me to write em

[gratuiciel]

(to the tune of running up that hill) you wanna hear about the fics im writing

u dont have to btw, especially if u dont know the fandoms im talking about (dq11 and tokrev) bc this will mostly sound like a bunch of nonsense if u dont

content warning for whump writing and descriptions of violence/injuries/captivity

first one is gonna be jasper//hendrik in a setting where the luminary doesnt show up on time at the last bastion and so hendrik has to surrender himself to save the people living there (bc he Knows they'll keep fighting if he asks them, and he Knows the whole siege is kind of his fault since jasper is doing this specifically to prove his military superiority over him). definitely gonna be whump in there. jasper keeps him captive in his sky fortress (hendrik cant exactly fly away) and mostly fucks with his mind, but then mordegon decides thats not fun enough and takes matters into his own hands (jasper eventually defects to the luminary while hendrik gets turned into a monster. role reversal babey!)

second one is a gen fic in which hendrik manages to go back to the past (eleven passed on his power during the final battle bc he was too injured to heal), so he's like okay ive got this im gonna fix everything also im literally proficient in both combat and magic thanks to the luminary's power so there is nothing i cant do... except that when he has to choose the moment where he wants to return he kind of panics bc there are so many things to fix, and the confusion as he formulates his wish causes him to return just a few weeks before the events of the game, except he's 6 now and he can't lift a sword anymore. get detective conan'd, idiot. (this is mostly bc adult hendrik with luminary powers would be op as fuck and therefore i had to nerf him and also force him to ask for help for once. he knows everything but cant say anything and he'll need to rely on others to save the world) the fic will then follow the canon story order but things will happen in a different way due to hendrik's interference

third one's premise is: chifuyu gets visions of the future instead of takemichi, and when he sees baji's future he jumps to take the hit in his place. when he wakes up in the hospital, he learns that baji took the blame for the stabbing (he's in jail now) and that his new hospital roommate (once his condition has stabilized) is none other than kazutora (he's been punched in the face a whole lot and got broken bones too). they cant get along at all and takemichi is tasked with watching over them (kazutora is in his division now). once kazutora has healed somewhat, he'll try to get revenge on kisaki and hanma for pushing him to stab baji. at this point he's just obsessed with vengeance and doesnt care abt his own personal safety and chifuyu gets visions of him getting into big big trouble and so he has to get him out of it each time. they grow to trust each other eventually. there is also this takemichi//kisaki subplot which i am cooking up, where kazutora sends dudes to fuck up kisaki while he himself is fighting hanma, and takemichi is the one to rescue (sort of) kisaki (he gets his ass kicked lol but him taking half the hits essentially means kisaki doesnt get beaten to death). then takemichi carries kisaki home to tend to his wounds and then the dude gets a fever and takemichi gets to learn somewhat abt his past and why he is like this. main appeal of the kisa//take subplot is that at some point takemichi will have to go to the future for information and find out that kisaki didnt kill hina bc he didnt propose to her bc now he's in love with him?? for some reason?? it's honestly so funny to me. also i just wanna flesh out kisaki as a villain and find out what couldve shaped his world view (needless to say his family life is Fucked up) anyway this will probably also follow the canon timeline except now kazutora is here to fuck shit up and takemichi is trying to understand kisaki (with mixed results), which will drastically change how things go i think (no idea how this will end yet. i havent even figured out how to make chifuyu and kazutora get injured enough to share a hospital room for some time but not too injured that they can make it to the christmas fight (theyll probably still be recovering by that time... possibility of additional angst by having surgery scars reopen and all))

[letstalksymphogear]

Symphogear, EP. 6

Last Time on Grand Theft Auto:

Tsubasa recovers from the world’s gayest coma as Hibiki trains her mind while putting aside such silly concepts as “the love of my life” and “literally being with my girlfriend.” After cooling Miku’s paranoia with her brand new washboard abs, Genjuro prepares the team for a pizza run across the city to deliver a dangerously hot pizza pie named Durandal. Chaos emerges as the delivery is intercepted by a rival pizza gang, lead by the nefarious Gremlin known as Yukine Chris. But, before the pizza could be claimed, dedicated pizza deliverywoman Hibiki not only steals it back, but eats it, harnessing the power of the pizza and unleashing cheesy pasta based chaos around the location.

Ryoko is so into it that she taps into her superpowers and protects Hibiki after she passes out. The delivery is considered a failure, and no tip is given.

And so, the journey continues...

Meanwhile, in this weird, tricked out mansion...

Chris meditates on some water metaphors of her own.

“that pacman colored freak took only touching it to activate a cheap ass french sword that gave her weird demon powers and its taken me YEARS to use this dumb stripper outfit and the funny cane that goes with it, what the FUCK man, what even is my life”

“maybe... maybe honeybaked hams ARE that powerful...”

“NO! turkey is the superior meat! it’s healthier, lower in fat, and way more tasty! fuck you! i’ll get my goddamned revenge!”

Chris begins musing about Fine’s motivations to capture Hibiki; during these, we’re treated to some brief image flashbacks of Chris’s life.

Suddenly, those jokes about food are a lot less funny.

It doesn’t take a genius to put two and two together as to why this young woman is helping a strange nudist dominatrix spread alien terror across the city of mumblednoises, Japan. She doesn’t really have many an option on the table. It’s either help the weird kinkster with her plans, or die.

Despite everything, she has a high opinion of Fine, for the same reasons someone might have a high opinion of a television show if it were the only show they were ever exposed to. She is deeply afraid of being alone again, because she has lived through such misery that the very thought of existing out in the cold again terrifies the shit out of her.

The Sun rises casually amidst Chris’s thoughts.

“ah shit. it just hit me. i literally have spent the entire night standing here instead of actually going the fuck to sleep. goddamnit.”

On such a devious metaphorical twist, Fine stands behind her as the Sun rises.

“yeah, jokes on you. i couldnt sleep for shit either. turns out, all nude, no blankets? in japan? real bad idea.”

“thats why i decided to GO GOTH, babey! whattaya think? do i give those witchy vibes, huh? real ‘black magic woman’ santana hours? feeling cute, gonna head out with the girls and summon satan in the woods kinda aesthetic looking shit? come on, be real with me. does this not look baller?”

“you look like morticia decided to go to the grocery store to buy some wonder bread, but other than that, its a step up from your usual pussy out attitude, so sure”

“you know i decided to get some brain cells on loan from Brain Cells R Us, and ive been thinking this solomon cane stuff is solomon lame. i dont need this dumb oversized harry potter cosplay prop to get shit done. also, murder is... sorta bad? im still trying to get the brain cell stuff down.”

“i can punch just as good as goody two shoes if not better.”

“lol go do it then champ, im gonna go cut down a forest of trees now”

And so, they both just kinda... stand there.

“QUACK, NEXT SCENE, QUACK”

Meanwhile, Tsubasa is rapidly trying to rehabilitate herself from her wounds like walking like a madman, her IV drip presumably filled with Taco Bell brand Doritos Locos Tacos super spicy nacho cheese. Taco Bell: Live Mas.

“im gonna clear every fucking taco bell in your goddamned memory, kanade”

“think outside the bun! wait, what? that was a taco bell slogan? ah fuck it, im dead. what nerd’s gonna try and correct me?”

“i would, kanade. i am that nerd.”

Tsubasa is hell bent to try and understand Kanade’s simple philosophy of helping others selflessly. Unfortunately, when Kanade died, she took all the brain cells between them in the process, so coming to this epiphany is a work in progress.

“listen its a fucking miracle you are 1. alive and 2. able to have your blood run on the garbage melted plastic taco bell tries to dupe people into believing is cheese so why dont you just lie down and think of better franchises to eat from”

“no! you dont understand! taco bell is a franchise of the PEOPLE! their meals are cheap and filling and- and the chicken quesadillas are of good quality for their price! i promised kanade- my vow to the death. taco bell... ergh... now and forever... i-”

“wait. my gay senses are tingling.”

It’s Hibiki, probably running track with Miku.

“oh yeah... her... i should probably apologize to her. about trying to kill her. and then letting her almost be kidnapped. and just giving her a general hard time about something that wasn’t explained to her in the slightest for months. she’s a good bean.”

Tsubasa proceeds to never canonically apologize to Hibiki throughout the entirety of all 4 seasons of Symphogear.

Look at em run. See, it’s a metaphor, because they haven’t communicated yet and they’re running from their problems! But they’re running towards Tsubasa, who is part of the representative problem these two share! Clearly literary genius.

It’s like someone went halfway into writing an NTR plotline and went “maybe this isn’t a good idea to market our songs on.”

Hibiki is still thinking about her Hellshake Yano moment with Durandal. Mainly how she nearly killed someone with it. Hibiki is very starkly in the “killing is bad, and wrong” camp of morality, a trait currently unique to her that she’ll wind up teaching literally everyone else she meets one way or another.

Some could argue the L stands for Lydian, and they’re wrong. It stands for Lesbian.

“that was one hell of a run, hibiki! im pooped! why dont we go to the locker room and call it a day, have a nice shower and just get some dinn-”

“this is the last straw.

i clean your plates. i cook your food. we eat, shit, shower, and sleep in the same FUCKING area, and this is how you repay me? huh? you think being your wife is easy shit, hibiki? half the damn time you’re running off like clark kent having food poisoning and the other half ive gotta babysit you, the emotional equivalent of a preteen clown, to make sure your life doesn’t self destruct harder than Atlantis sinking into the ocean. im done! i am DONE. im reopening my tinder, im slamming my ass BACK into okcupid, and im gonna date some CUTE ACADEMY GIRLS that treat me BETTER than this ABSOLUTE BETRAYAL OF HEART AND IM NOT CRYING I SWEAR ITS JUST THE SWEAT IN MY EYES AND HIBIKI HOW COULD YOU-”

“oh yeah, sure! hey, lemme just do a few more laps, ive just been feeling judgmental about myself and my figure, you know? gotta push myself further...”

“o-oh yeah, sure. no worries, ill wait for you. love you too, hibiki...”

The girls bathe together, as good friends typically do.

“hey you ever notice the showers here have like, weird psuedo-luxurious minipools to bathe in? like, how rich is this school?”

“whoever made this place is either rich or a pervert. or both, probably!”

Miku remarks that Hibiki has changed since she’s entered Lydian, in a manner most unheterosexual.

“oh FUCK you really DO have washboard abs now! ohhh my god.”

“damn, those abs were heavenly. let’s get pancakes later.”

I won’t screenshot it but something to note is that they actually wear each other’s corresponding underwear colors (or even, if you want to examine more closely, each other’s underwear). Here’s an equivalent scene to give you the mental image.

This is the face of someone who knows what they want and already have it. Such is the power of Kohinata Miku.

Meanwhile, Genjuro comes back from the funeral of the guy the Americans filled violently and with impunity.

“yo that all black look looks baller. i should borrow that look... id look pretty gothy in it.”

“ryoko i sympathize with your sharp, fashionista eye but this was for a funeral, i was paying my respects to the dead. thats the usual dress code.”

“didnt know they updated that. i remember back in my day, we just went in white garments and chanted in latin!”

“shit was fire. literally. lots of funeral pyres.”

“lmao ryoko buddy your larping sessions arent actual history”

“hey dont shit on larping around me. i used to be a professional larper while i was majoring in acting. helped really sell my career when i had to pretend to slay the Dark Lord Jyarloen atop the mountain of skulls in Hargobor after my family was killed by the Dark Army. asshole.”

“haha yeah, larping, thats cool yeah, i do that

i...

i larp.”

“oh yeah? you wanna join my larping session sometime then? we’re gonna do an ancient babylon plot thats inspired by some anime, itll be fun”

“.....................................im super into realism.”

“i know im dressed for a funeral but id like to not part ways with my dignity yet. besides, we’ve got serious shit to talk about. basically, we’re on the verge of getting shitcanned.”

As it turns out, the death of this politician removed the last obstacle of opposition to maintain the 2nd Division, as the average criticism against the 2nd Division is “why are we funding this mystery division when we don’t know what they do”. Of course, the sensible idea for an organization that defeats the Noise is to declassify it, given people of different jobs and positions have physically seen the Symphogear in action, but you know. “Oh no, the other governments will come after us” stick gets shaken.

“im in a union. i know my rights. you’re not taking my acting job here away from me.”

“im not going back to be a preschool teacher. its been ten year. the bites on my ankles still havent healed...”

“yeah man, shit sucks ass. i cant fund my adoption habits if im fired.”

Look at these cinematic parallels. Symphogear truly is a franchise made by someone living in 3030.

“worst part is the new minister is super into america. he’s a... westaboo.”

“a westaboo?”

“westaboo?”

“did he just unironically say westaboo”

“he said westaboo. oh my god. this is the hell timeline.”

“i mean people kept calling me that for worshipping all these fighting flicks so i guess it fit? i dont see the problem here”

Meanwhile, in Lydian Academy...

“so it hit me, right? we’re ALL girls. and we ALL sing. now, humor me a moment. what if... what if we’ve all been recruited to potentially be superheroes... through our singing? like, there’s no coincidence that all this shit happens around us, right? and a famous singer LIVES here? i saw the black cars outside! weird shit is happening here- im not even gonna eat the all you can eat bar anymore!”

“kathy there is literally no such thing as superheroes who sing. this place is more likely to be a organ harvesting op than whatever madness you’re saying”

“what? you need me, a singing superhero, to go stop a problem happening underneath the school, a location meant to recruit young women into potentially becoming fellow crime fighting singers?”

“yeah im too busy poppin’ caps in asses so go kick ass in my place”

“sure!”

“.....................................who ya talkin to, hibiki?”

“the boss! gotta go do a thing again...”

“hibiki, i dont like the fact that capitalism is tearing us apart.”

“you’ve gotta join me in the revolution, hibiki. you. me. luxury automated gay space communism. aint it the dream? share my vision, hibiki. its glorious.”

“n... no...? no gay space communism today? well, what about tomorrow? or the next day? or... maybe the next day? baby steps, you say? but, direction action, hibiki! we’ve gotta strike now!”

“it’s okay hibiki. when i take over the world and destroy all first world government leaders, and unite the globe in my encompassing reign and love... ill make sure to spare you, and be my bride to be.”

“thanks miku. im just not ready yet for the globe to burn in an unending ball of fire as the continents fuse into a new utopia composed of our combined wills. also, ive really gotta go, its genuinely an emergency.”

“for the cause!”

“yes hibiki... for the cause...”

Admittedly, you can see the stages of grief Miku goes through when she sees Hibiki say she can’t join her for pancakes. It’s sad. This side story sucks.

Meanwhile, as it turns out, the problem Hibiki needed to resolve was checking on Tsubasa to see if she hadn’t dissolved into Taco Bell brand hot n’ spicy Tabasco sauce.

“god, cant believe taco bell was closed. now i gotta deliver these lame ass flowers”

“cant wait to get threatened again. wonder what she’ll say. ‘hibiki, i should have killed you when i had the chance.’ or ‘you’re so goddamned weak. i could break your spine with my fingernail’, or some other stuff about metaphors. oh, my stops here”

“HEY BITCH WHATS GOOD-”

“HOLY SHIT”

“you are already”

“dead.”

[dykecassidy]

1 9 10 12 17 18 19 20 27 30 for the writing ask meme! pick and choose tho if u dont wanna do all/any of em!

writer asks

1.  Do you listen to music when you write?

yes! it cant be new stuff, though. it has to be well listened to, familiar, bc otherwise i start paying attention to the lyrics and thinking of stuff other than what im writing.

9.    Current WIP

like as in open right now, is chapter 17 of wyw. i got like 5 paragraphs.

10. Do you set yourself deadlines?

i try to? i dont have much success with that. i need to have the outside expectation, like i told someone i would write it for them and i said i could do it in a certain time frame. i do pretty good with the twbb and twrpzine deadlines, tho i am still usually crunched at the end.

12 answered!!

17.  What writing habits or rituals do you have?

i outline so so so much. i love it. i do it when i dont want to commit to starting an idea, when i feel i cant write it fully, when i just want it down and out as quick as possible. its just bullet points and “so like”. its just spitballing with myself. i can [whatever] the perfect word until later, i can “so he was like ‘lmao’” bc i know what that dialogue feels like, i can commentate about how wild it is, and note about how i need to fix it.

18. If you could collaborate with anyone, who would it be, and what would you write about?

funnily enough i was searching my blog for archie and i found a post i tagged them in about a kind of challenge where you alternate chapters and try to write completely different genres, wrestling the story from one another.

i also constantly want to collab with all my friends that write; me, foleh, and lula are almost kind of constantly working collaboratively and very rarely “formally writing”. i wanna do comedy action with emma, where sung shrieks and everyone stares. i wanna do Weird fuckshit with cleo where havve is.... havve and phobos is phogoin’.

19. How do you keep yourself motivated?

i get excited about what im making! i get excited about making a story and seeing the end, and sharing that snippet of a world with other people.

20. How many WIPs and story ideas do you have?

ddont do this to me

in terms of like, pure outlines? things i have plotted out? like. im gonna low ball and say at least a dozen. even things i have no intentions of actually finishing, things that are like parts of a larger series (wyw and next big au). 

i have many many story ideas; i have a folder of notes on my phone thats just ‘fic’ and its inspiration, seeds, drawings for things. a lot of them are vague ideas, dialogue snippets, even just lyrics. idk what ill do with them, but theyre there.

27. Favourite line/scene

ohh.

okay i scrolled down gdocs and picked something at random. i picked a fic from the v creatively named ‘angel au’. 

A mop of golden brown hair, curls sticking up, bedhead. Big dark eyes looking at Rob, on a face covered with freckles, almost glowing, almost glittery. Rob’s hand on their face, his skin looking light and rosy next to theirs. Their mouth moved, the same shapes over and over, head shaking. 

“It’s okay,” [Josh] could hear Rob say, “just go slow. I’m here.”

30. Favourite idea you haven’t started on yet

my next human au!!! im keeping to kind of the same theme, where only one (1) member of tarp is actually a human, and this time around itll be phobos. Sung is his dog, who is still perfectly named doctor sung bc cmon thats a rly good dog name and hes like a corgie/retriever/mutt mix. i have 3 chapters outline at least partially, the first one half started, and im deliberately being tight lipped on it.

[jrbalufbfnzl]

I slept late yesterday n woke up at 9h30 bc my mom ws spamming my phone. I have to text wishes for my fam bc their granddad died and go to the pharmacy. Slept from 1 till almost 10 and didnt feel tired when i woke up. Ill try n b productive today im gna take my pills n walk the dogs. I also have to finish mty sisters drawing n listen to all her memos

I need to cut my hair i cannot stand the sensation

Thinking about having more tats n being anxious bout it for some reason

Ill try to be strong n turn away from food and hopefully as well ill be able to exercise but no food at ALL today sounds grear to me but no pills and no sleeping all day bc it ruins the mood

Didnt wake n bake but didnt meditate, im lazy to meditate thismorn. Been hanging on my phone for a lil more than an hour so ill just go out n do my stuff now

My dogs off her medication today i hope shell getbetter i cannot deal w the stress of her having a chronical serous disease.

I scratched my ears until they bled n couldnt hezr well yesterday

UPDATE : i managed to walk yhe first dog and fed both of em. Im waiting for my pills to kick to walk the second one. It was a struggle to get something non triggering to eat and im trying to wait as much as possible to eat. Days are fucking short anyways and ill xhabge my password and lockdown uvereats to not order some tonight maybe. Ill try and sleep early and stay strong and also get ready to see peeps and maybe feel a lil bit better but also i wanna stay alone. I cried a bit bc im ashamed to be so paralysed at 25 time is running fast and hezlth as well and the fall could be terrible idk. I felt anxious to walk both of the dogs at the same time or evenbto vring them to the parc or go to the pharmacy even tho its 5mins away n its kind of a nice walk. My stomach and intestine hurts tho. I hope ill manage to go to the pharmacy n exercise today n shave my hair n meditate and finish my sisters drzwing. Its not that much

UPDATE 2 : its 30 to 7 and i managed to cut my hair and walk the two dogs once. I feel zncious about walking them a second time but ill make it feed them then take them out.

My best friend made a post sayin that knowing otger people dezl w the same stuff as her is rezsuring so i ferl less guilty of "making it about me all the time" bc thats rly not what im trying to do and my bf told me i wzs incapable of listening so i guesd it fucked up my self apreciation.

Sometimes i feel like my bf is the only thing in his world and i also feel like its giod for him but at the same time i feel like im wrong znd im the one taking toi mych space. I have 0 sense of whats real and whats not and as soin as im thinkin ab smth that is not invalidating to me i kind of gaslight myself into thinking otherwise znd remarks my bf made repeatedly in the past arent helping. I have to finish my sistets drzwing walk the dogs n exercise. Today i felt anxious multiple times and wasnt really able to get out of bed. I didnt meditate first thing in the morning either whoch i shouldve. Im gonna try my psycholoist tomorrow to take another apt bc i missed the last one. I feel like a failure. Good thing is im not hubgry at all bc of aderall and stress so thats cool. Ill try ti go to the pharact tomorrow as well but even thibking about livin another dy and having stuff t do makes me rly anxious i feel incapable of having a routine.

Update 3 : did the drawing, hate it and i dont have my mind up to that. Esp sibce the dezdline is so close and i feel like my sisters work ethic is so abusive and self centered that i just dont have fuel to turn her idea into smth cooler and add detzils or a personal touch. I just dobt want to experiment w it and i hate doing it and it shows. I walked my first dog for the second time fed them both gave the last pill to my second dog abd im about to walk her out now. I feel shitty about my day.

Today my ideal me :

Wouldve woke up meditate exercise and took care of the dogs in a whistle withiut thinking to avoid building up unecessary anxiety and have the drawing done by thr end of the morning and went to the dog park and pharlacy afterwards anf make music.

If someone saw me from an outside perspective :

I think they would think that my depression is quite invalidating and that im just letting myself down completely

Today i did :

Nothing consistent but i feel like i did my best within my possivilities and i went above my lack of motivation to draw and rakr care of the dogs

I felt :

Down empty and dead anxious and tired.

I ate :

Two biscuits and a bubble tea

Tomorrow i'll :

Try to meditate and exercise and feed the dogs and get ready for what its worth and go out a little abd go to the pharmacy abd call my shrink and try to get sum weed even tho i shouldnt but the anciety is too much

Im grateful for :

Having the strenght to write stuff down znd maybe itll be the start of a routine

My shrink being so lame she accepted that i get surgery

The dogs remiding me that i rly shouldnt br like my parents and helping me reflec and remember on abuse and stuff