#waiter waiter! 1 million beers please!

[mimiikw0]

Might become an alcoholic at age 16, chill with my dad who knows

[mannco-official]

Oh waiter! 1 million beers please!

[alitheamateur]

The Grind-Chapter 19

The newby fighters thankfully handled media horrendously, answering questions in choppy six or seven word responses. Sure, it limited the material and made the story vulnerable to the writers embellishing devices, but the speedy conclusion of the often clock-stopping, boring event was never one complained about amongst the journalistic world.

When I stepped outside in pursuit of the strangely near empty bar, I pulled the sleeves of my blazer off and draped it over my forearm, sliding my clutch between my bicep and ribcage. The crisp, white silk of the tank top swayed with the calm, cool breeze of the nighttime air, mixing with my nervously sweating skin, creating an array of chill bumps over my flesh. An exiting patron held the door open as I swept inside the dimly lit sports bar. There weren’t many tables, only 3 tv’s, and no blasting music. Hence the lack of customers, I’m sure. Colton was easy to spot, hunching at a high-top near the glass front of the building. He hadn’t ordered a drink yet, once again, trying desperately to execute that military like, gentlemanly manner his father Michael, had instilled in him, presumably. I dropped the weight of my tired body in the un-cushioned wooden seat, and huffed aloud in the relief. “That didn’t take too long,” he stated first.

“Those two were complete media virgins. They didn’t have much to say.” I confirmed as I massaged in the sanitizer I applied to my palms, and scanned over the sparse clients.  

“Want me to grab you a drink or somethin’? I didn’t know if you were still a martini girl, so I held off.” Had his accent become thicker with his hair?

“Actually, I’ll just take a seltzer. Lime on the side too, please.” Tia would probably be able to sniff out the scent of alcohol in my sweat like a hungry hound dog, and have my tail for drinking while training.

She had graciously granted me a pass on my birthday, so I didn’t see it wise to push my luck any further. Come to think of it though, when in the actual hell had I become the girl to drink seltzer water and lime?

My ex now turned waiter for the moment returned with a small square tumbler filled with fizzy, clear liquid, and a long neck in his other hand. His black shirt painted over the ripples of his back, the muscles there moved like thickened water down the spread of him. I’d love to be a fly on the wall when he shops for himself. I can only imagine his decision-making unraveling something like, “yeah, black t-shirt. I can always use another black t-shirt.”

“Thank you,” I said between lengthy sips. “And thanks too for, um… the flowers. They were stunning. You really didn’t have to, but it was a sweet gesture, Colton.”

“So I did okay, huh? They’re your favorite?” He hoped with questioning eyes, taking a quick pull of his sweating beer.

“Yes, Colt. They’re my favorite. You did well. Extremely well.”

“I owe you another 50 dozen more, Liv….”

Here is comes. The conversation was about to take a dicey dive into the abyss.

“It’s not flowers I need, Colton. I think you know a million dollars’ worth of pretty bouquets won’t fix, this.” I drew an invisible line through the space from me, to him, “It’s not gonna fix us. Or, whatever us there was, I guess.”

He sat his half empty beverage on the scuffed table tap, and I noticed the glass chatter against the surface. He was shaking. This wasn’t the angry, poked bear shaking though. This was the abused, cowering, wounded bird shaking.

“Yeah, Liv. I get that, okay? I just didn’t know where to fuckin’ start, ya’ know? I didn’t wanna get too pushy..” he began, while drawing nervous figure-eights with his callused finger tips along the cracks in the table top.  “But, I gotta know. I ain’t tryna put you on the spot or nothin’, but is there any fixing it, babe? I have no right to asking you this shit, I realize that. But, just give me somethin’ here, Liv. Should I just write us off?”

The million dollar question. How was I supposed to give him the answer his desperate eyes so anxiously desired, when I didn’t have it myself? I loved Colton Ritter, no matter how blindly I wanted the fact to be untrue, there was no refuting it. But, I couldn’t shake the reluctancy I felt towards him either. That apprehensive, yet yearning brew filling up my gut. The next words I spoke to him would be the defining moment of what my future held, so I hesitated. Taking as long as I needed to sort through the perfect retort.

“You act like that’s such a simple question to answer, Colt. You have no idea what you did to me for Christ sakes,” my fist gently, but effectively smacked the table, clinking the glass beverages there. I refrained from chewing his hide in nagging anger, but I wasn’t about to hold back on what I truly needed to say. “I was a literal basket case. As damn foolish and weak as that may sound, it’s a fact. I missed work, I made myself sick from the unrelenting crying. Like, seriously, there was actual vomit, Colton. I wore your fuckin clothes around the apartment like a lost mutt!” I could see him tense entirely, almost wincing aloud in shame and heartache. And I half wondered if maybe he’d done some of his own shameful grieving during our time apart. “Every day for nearly a year felt like one big, constant punch to my gut, making it almost hard to even catch a decent breath. I’ve been better for a while now, but every single day, your stupid, smug face finds its way into my head….” I allowed myself a pause to try and extinguish the burning tears I knew were about to come loose, but there was no use. Once the first fell, I just opened the watery dam. “If I’m being honest, part of my really just hates you. A big chunk of me, as a matter of fact. But I know the love is still there, as much as the hate. Probably more,” snubbing through my tearful fit. “I don’t think I’m ready right this minute, Colton. For us, I mean. I think I might be at some point, but who’s to say… I can’t name the day and time. So, if that isn’t enough for you, and you feel like I’m a waste of your time, then yes, you should just move on.”  

Th brawniest, hard as stone man I’d ever known, raised a hand to wipe dry his weepy eyes. It wasn’t a hysterical, sobbing outburst, and an actual tear may not have fallen free, but they were there. The glazy sheen over his blue toned eyes tonight gave him away. He blew out the breath he’d apparently been holding in before his mustered the composure to speak back.

“I’m on your time, Livvy, alright? I’ll just stay outta your way, and if ya’ want me, you know I’m here. I fucked up. Royally, to say the least. There is so much I wanna say, and I hope you gimme the chance to piece it all together for you someday in the near future. I’m sorry seems to be the most important thing right now. And I’m gonna say it every day I have the chance. I’ll hang back as best I can, okay? And if someone else so happens to come along, for either of us, then I guess that’s that, huh?” He reached forth his hand to graze as gently as a summer breeze over my resting fingers, a current of G-force energy rattled through my every internal organ. I didn’t jerk away from his touch this time, instead allowing myself the loving awakening I had longed for the past days without him. He’d be the death of me, whether it be in happiness or misery, I wasn’t sure.

“I think that sounds like the best way to handle it, Ritter. I can work with that,” I sheepishly smiled, curling an auburn strand behind my ear. “Now, I better get home and get some sleep.” Picking my clutch up first, then swallowing the last mouthful of my drink, I stretched my petite legs searching for the ground below me. Before I could drop on my heels, he had swiftly came to my side, offering his hand out to steady my drop from the heighted stool. The man was so full of these sickeningly, syrupy sweet courtly gestures, and I might as well have been licking the plate.

“Let me walk you to the car this time. Please?” he almost begged holding my jacket open for me to slide my arms in.

“How about I walk you to your bike, and we’ll call it a night.” It wasn’t a question. I wanted to seem as independent as I could to him, while also establishing again that I’d be okay without him if things didn’t pan out with our relationship.

I went out on a wobbly whim and locked my arm through the empty crease in his elbow, while his hand was snuggled deep into his jean pockets, and out of a side eyed glance, and detected a half smile on his lips. “My bike is right here on the corner. Is you car close?”

“Close enough. Don’t you worry about me, kid,” I winked before breaking my clutch on his arm as we reached his black bike parked by a ticking meter.

“Hey listen, Liv. I’m thinking about sticking with Temple Fitness. Y’know like, staring up a membership to train there and stuff. But if you’re not good with it, then I’m out.” He remarked strapping his helmet around his bearded, calico chin.

“I think I can handle it, Colton. Just stay outta my way, big guy..” it was clear by the playfulness of my high pitched, girl giggly that I was testing the waters with some flirty banter. The saluted “yes, boss” he tossed back told me he was aware of my joking tone. When I took a couple slow paces in exit, bidding him a goodnight, he met my steps, and leaned in for a hopeful kiss to my pert cheek. \

“Not yet, Colt. Not yet, okay?” The dangerously close presence of his lips to me could’ve shot me a million feet in the air above us. But, I had to keep the line drawn, for now anyways. He wasn’t out to the woods yet.

When I gave him my back in search of my own car down the sidewalk, he yelled my name, muffled through the visor of his helmet.

“Hey 2-1!” I turned slightly, never ceasing my footsteps, careful not to lose my balance while walking backwards in my strappy shoes. “You look better than ever, babe. And I’ll happily take my punishment for sayin’ it.” He took his bottom lip between his teeth, and I curled my lips up with brows raised in disbelief, yet satisfying pleasure, winking with no words, and went on my merry way. I heard his bike fire up with an almost lion like roar, and he sped off in the opposite direction. Revving his accelerator, no doubt in teenage like, hormonal ego.

 The next morning, all too bright, and much too early I entered the office hanging my sleepy head, still reeling from the unexpected turn of events the previous evening. Through groggy rasps, I served my morning hellos to passing co-workers, determined to reach the noiseless four walls of my office and downing the contents of my Styrofoam cup. If I timed it just right, I thought maybe I could even sneak a 30-minute powernap sometime around the 10 o’clock hour. When I crossed the concierge desk, Layla, the awkward, mousy receptionist waved a hand to halt me.

“This package came to you this morning, Ms. Elliott.” The box rectangular box, wrapped in wrinkled brown paper had apparently been delivered early morning to the office.

I thanked Layla the messenger, and stepped over the threshold of the empty elevator. The package was unmarked, only adding to the quizzical allure, but I held my eager hands from slashing through the wrapping until I got into my private office. I blindly flipped on the single light switch, my purse thudding onto the neatly organized desktop calendar. I ripped the first corner of the box opened before I was even sat into the swivel seat, when a small folded sheet of paper fell into the floor.

Livvy,

Thought you may need this. The other one seemed little ratty. I think I cut it just how you like them. There’s plenty more where this came from.

Love,

Colt

I dropped the lid of the package, peeling back a translucent layer of tissue paper to find a white, slightly dingy colored Pittsburgh Pirates t-shirt. One I very much recognized as belonging to the gift giver himself. A weak smile had instantaneously crept across my face as I ran a thumb over the fading of the smooth polyester blend. I pondered, and settled on a decision in that second, that I was going to unapologetically relish the games he’d be willingly to play to win back my affection. I wasn’t wholeheartedly dreadful though, and I knew sending him thanks for the thoughtful efforts was the right thing to do, so I sent him a text to extend some reserved gratitude. Giving him the impression I was appreciative, but wasn’t eating out of his veiny hands just yet.

Tia was distant as of recent. Cold as a sparkling Pittsburgh frost before dawn. The conversation we had about my exchanges with Colt weren’t half as pleasant, and supportive as my phone call with Sara. Tia hated the man, not saying I blamed her. No matter what he said, or didn’t say, the gifts he gave, or the groveling that arose, she wasn’t forgetting the past. Colton Ritter was blacklisted indefinitely in her book. So much so, I even had to gulp down concerns that fizzled for my own friendship with her.

Climbing the steel steps of the cage with her was never too terribly intimidating before that night. I always knew no matter how repetitive she’d  be with her promising that she wouldn’t take it easy on me, I could always sense the restraint of her moves. Yet again, before that night… The trifling stomps of her bare feet across the mat would’ve signaled danger, if the haughty shove passed my shoulder hadn’t already. “Chew that rubber, Elliott,” she yelled unkindly, instructing me to hurry with my mouth piece so we could get the session underway.

She was bouncing upward, shoving her knees into her chest, stretching to shatter my thighs with one of her categorical back kicks. Willow was crouched in the floor beside the metal confines, arms crossed about her chest in curious observation, Tia’s harshness not unnoticed by her and the onlookers in the workout room. We danced the usual mirrored waltz across the octagon from each other, each waiting for someone to stretch forth searching for the first connecting jab. Before my mind had a single minute to strategize an assault, Tia lunged lowly to bearhug my legs right from beneath my own body, and my elbows nearly ricocheted off the canvas floor. The sweat of my attacker was already profusely flowing, more so from the rumbling anger, and probable resentment she was feeling for the likes of me. We wormed around on the patched ground, she grabbing a lock around my legs, me tugging on her extended forearm. Amongst our grunts, and gasps of pain, a very confused and scratchy voice sung out above all else.  

“The fuck? Liv?”

My eyes beckoned toward Colton’s wide stance next to Willow, but Tia didn’t let up. The more I fidgeted for release, the tighter she wound her meager form around me. When the match between us didn’t halt, I heard his intrusions slice the room again.

“LIV!” But this time, it wasn’t a questioning tone. He was demanding acknowledgment, and more importantly an explanation.

My “friendly” opponent loosened her vice, and I lunged a swift, fumbly kick to shake her off. If my face wasn’t already reddened from the efforts of the spar, it sure would’ve been painted with  a bright shade when I stood to see the concerned contortions of his always tempting mouth. With his hands raised in dumbfounding confusion awaiting his answer, I rushed towards the cage door to meet him in the corner he was heading to.

“THIS is what you’ve been doing here, Livvy? What the hell?” He was lazily scratching a hand through the brown of his beard.

“Not that it’s a single ounce of your business, Colt, but yes. Started a few months back, Tia suggested it.” My feet firm and solid under his disapproving stares.

“Oh, c’mon Liv. I don’t mean to sound like a bossy prick about it, ok? It’s your life, you can do what ya’ want with it. It just… I dunno.. scares me, I guess…” I turned to notice his restless hands, squirming in fists at his side, and his teeth visibly grinding behind closed chops. “I hate myself for hurting you. How did ya’ think I was gonna take to seeing someone smash a fist to those pretty cheeks, babe?”

My gloved fingers didn’t hesitate to seek out his own, stilling his concerns. I intertwined our digits, and I swear I felt the life creep back into me.  His eyes closed under feathery lashes, and there was no denying the husky exhalation that purred from him at our connecting flesh.

“I’m not some.. some weak kitten, Colt. I know you think I’m just a lowly damsel who needs a constant eye watching over her, but, that’s not the case.”

Although maybe very “me: Tarzan, you: Jane” to the outsiders perspective, Colton was very… well, male. He considered his place as my partner to be one of the valiant knight, shielding me from any oncoming harm. My humble opinion? It was all part of his blue collar, endearing charm. But, he’d have to reel it in on the aspect of my fight training.

“It’s not that I think ya’ need it 24-hour surveillance, kid. As a matter of fact, I think it’s just a shot to my ego that you don’t need it, ya’ know. I just wanna protect ya’, alright? Damn it, you’re always makin’ me… makin’ me talk so much, 2-1.” He enfolded my small hand tighter under his grip.

“I appreciate that. My very own lethal prrotector, huh?” I winked and wet my bottom lip catching his eye. “Ask Tia though, I hold my own with these gloves, big shot. Be careful, or you may have to find out first hand.”

Cool it, hormones. You might as well just jump his bones right here.

The flirtation went crawling like a cold shutter obviously over his roasting skin, and his eyes were swirling through shades of blue. “I would happily take that beating, sweetheart!”

Walk away. Now. Go liv, you’re drooling.

“I gotta get back to her though, or I’m gonna pay the price. See ya’ around?” I was securing the gloves assuredly, ready to bid riddance to him before his animal senses detected my feminine excitement, and he held me back.

“I’ll be around, yeah. Oh, hey girl! Nice shirt, by the way..” I went for a drink of my room temperature sports drink and nearly gagged on it. No way he couldn’t notice I was sporting the package he’d delivered a few short hours ago.

TAGS: @torialeysha @eap1935 @mollybegger-blog @littleluna98

[fluentlee]

625 words in korean

These are the 625 words to know in your target language in Korean. I excluded honorific/formal words, which you can find in my last post. Please feel free to correct me if there are any mistakes as I’m not a native speaker ^_^

A D J E C T I V E S  ||  형 용 사 to be long // 길다 to be short (vs. long) // 짧다 to be tall // 키가 크다 to be short (vs. tall) // 키가 작다 to be wide // 넓다 to be narrow // 좁다 to be big/large // 크다 to be small/little // 작다 to be slow // 느리다 to be fast // 빠르다 to be hot // 덥다; 뜨겁다 to be cold // 춥다; 차갑다 to be warm // 따뜻하다 to be cool // 시원하다 to be new // 새롭다 to be old (vs. new) // 오래되다 to be young // 젊다 to be old (vs. young) // 늙다 to be good // 좋다 to be bad // 나쁘다 to be wet // 축축하다 to be dry // 마르다 to be sick // 아프다 to be healthy // 건강하다 to be loud // 시끄럽다 to be quiet // 조용하다 to be happy // 행복하다 to be sad // 슬프다 to be beautiful // 아름답다 to be ugly // 못생겼다 to be deaf // 귀먹다 to be blind // 눈이 멀다 to be nice // 착하다 to be mean // 못되다 to be rich // 부유하다 to be poor // 가난하다 to be thick // 두껍다 to be thin // 얇다 to be expensive // 비싸다 to be cheap // 싸다 to be flat // 평평하다 to be curved // 둥글다 male // 남성 female // 여성 to be tight // 팽팽하다 to be loose // 헐겁다 to be high // 높다 to be low // 낮다 to be soft // 부드럽다 to be hard // 딱딱하다; 단단하다 to be deep // 깊다 to be shallow // 얕다 to be clean // 깨끗하다 to dirty // 더럽다 to be strong // 강하다 to be weak // 약하다 to be alive // 살아있다 to be heavy // 무겁다 to be light (vs. heavy) // 가볍다 to be dark // 어둡다 to be light (vs. dark) // 밝다 to be nuclear // 핵이다 to be famous // 유명하다

A N I M A L S  ||  동 물 dog // 개 cat // 고양이 fish // 물고기 bird // 새 cow // 소 pig // 돼지 mouse // 쥐 horse // 말 wing // 날개 animal // 동물

A R T  ||  예 술 band // 악단; 밴드 song // 노래 (musical) instrument // 악기 music // 음악 movie // 영화 art // 예술; 미술

B E V E R A G E S  ||  음 료 coffee // 커피 tea // 차 wine // 와인; 포도주 beer // 맥주 juice // 주스 water // 물 milk // 우유 beverage // 음료

B O D Y  ||  몸 head // 머리 neck // 목 face // 얼굴 beard // 수염 hair // 머리카락 eye // 눈 mouth // 입 lip // 입술 nose // 코 tooth // 이; 치아 ear // 귀 tear (drop) // 눈물 tongue // 혀 back // 등 toe // 발가락 finger // 손가락 foot // 발 hand // 손 leg // 다리 arm // 팔 shoulder // 어깨 heart // 심장 blood // 피 brain // 뇌 knee // 무릎 sweat // 땀 disease // 질병 bone // 뼈 voice // 목소리 skin // 피부 body // 몸

C L O T H I N G  ||  옷 hat // 모자 dress // 원피스; 드레스 suit // 양복 skirt // 치마 shirt // 셔츠 t-shirt // 티셔츠 pants // 바지 shoes // 신발 pocket // 주머니 coat // 코트 stain // 얼룩 clothing // 옷

C O L O R S  ||  색 깔 red // 빨간(색) green // 초록색 blue // 파란(색) yellow // 노란(색) brown // 갈색 pink // 분홍색; 핑크색 orange // 주황색 black // 검은(색) white // 하얀(색); 흰색 gray // 회색 color // ���깔

D A Y S  O F  T H E  W E E K  ||  요 일 monday // 월요일 tuesday // 화요일 wednesday // 수요일 thursday // 목요일 friday // 금요일 saturday // 토요일 sunday // 일요일

D I R E C T I O N S  ||  방 향 top // 위 bottom // 밑 side // 옆 front // 앞 back // 뒤 outside // 밖 inside // 안 up // 위 down // 아래 left // 왼쪽 right // 오른쪽 straight // 직진 north // 북쪽 south // 남쪽 east // 동쪽 west // 서쪽 direction // 방향

E L E C T R O N I C S  ||  전 자  제 품 clock // 시계 lamp // 전등 fan // 선풍기 cell phone // 휴대폰; 핸드폰 network // 네트워크 computer // 컴퓨터 (computer) program // 컴퓨터 프로그램 laptop // 노트북 screen // 컴퓨터 화면 camera // 카메라 television // 텔레비전; 티비 radio // 라디오

F O O D S  ||  음 식 egg // 달걀; 계란 cheese // 치즈 bread // 빵 soup // 국; 수프 cake // 케이크 chicken // 닭고기 pork // 돼지고기 beef // 소고기 apple // 사과 banana // 바나나 orange // 오렌지 lemon // 레몬 corn // 옥수수 rice // 쌀; 밥 oil // 기름 seed // 씨 knife // 칼 spoon // 숟가락 fork // 포크 plate // 접시 cup // 컵 breakfast // 아침 lunch // 점심 dinner // 저녁 sugar // 설탕 salt // 소금 bottle // 병 food // 음식

H O M E  ||  집 table // 식탁; 탁자 chair // 의자 bed // 침대 dream // 꿈 window // 창문 door // 문 bedroom // 침실 kitchen // 부엌; 주방 bathroom // 욕실; 화장실 pencil // 연�� pen // 펜 photograph // 사진 soap // 비누 book // 책 page // 페이지 key // 열쇠 paint // 물감 letter // 편지 note // 메모 wall // 벽 paper // 종이 floor // 바닥 ceiling // 천장 roof // 지붕 pool // 수영장 lock // 자물쇠 telephone // 전화 garden // 정원 yard // 마당 needle // 바늘 bag // 가방 box // 상자 gift // 선물 card // 카드 ring // 반지 tool // 도구

J O B S  ||  직 업 teacher // 선생님 student // 학생 lawyer // 변호사 doctor // 의사 patient // 환자 waiter // 웨이터; 종업원 secretary // 비서 priest // 성직자; 사제 police // 경찰 army // 군대 soldier // 군인 artist // 화가 author // 작가 manager // 부장님 reporter // 기자 actor // 배우 job // 직업

L O C A T I O N S  ||  위 치 city // 도시 house // 집 apartment // 아파트 street/road // 길; 거리 airport // 공항 train station // 기차역 bridge // 다리 hotel // 호텔 restaurant // 식당; 레스토랑 farm // 농장 court // 법원 school // 학교 office // 사무실 room // 방 town // 마을 university // 대학교 club // 클럽 bar // 술집; 바 park // 공원 camp // 야영지 store/shop // 가게 theatre // 극장; 영화관 library // 도서관 hospital // 병원 church // 교회 market // 시장 country (usa, france, etc.) // 국가; 나라 building // 건물 ground // 땅 (outer) space // 우주 공간 bank // 은행 location // 위치

M A T E R I A L S  ||  재 료 glass // 유리 metal // 금속 plastic // 플라스틱 wood // 나무 stone // 돌 diamond // 다이아몬드 clay // 점토 dust // 먼지 gold // 금 copper // 구리 silver // 은 material // 재료

M A T H / M E A S U R E M E N T S  ||  수 학 / 측 정 meter // 미터 centimeter // 센티미터 kilogram // 킬로그램 inch // 인치 foot // 풋 pound // 파운드 half // 반 circle // 원형 square // 정사각형 temperature // 온도 date // 날짜 weight // 중량 edge // 가장자리 corner // 모퉁이

M I S C E L L A N E O U S  ||  잡 동 사 니 map // 지도 dot // 점 consonant // 자음 vowel // 모음 light // 빛 sound // 소리 yes // 네 no // 아니요 piece // 조각 pain // 아픔; 통증 injury // 부상 hole // 구멍 image // 이미지 pattern // 양식; 패턴 noun // 명사 verb // 동사 adjective // 형용사

M O N T H S  ||  달 january // 1월 (일월) february // 2월 (이월) march // 3월 (삼월) april // 4월 (사월) may // 5월 (오월) june // 6월 (유월) july // 7월 (칠월) august // 8월 (팔월) september // 9월 (구월) october // 10월 (시월) november // 11월 (십일월) december // 12월 (십이월)

N A T U R E  ||  자 연 sea // 바다 ocean // 대양 river // 강 mountain // 산 rain // 비 snow // 눈 tree // 나무 sun // 태양 moon // 달 world // 세계 the earth // 지구 forest // 숲 sky // 하늘 plant // 식물 wind // 바람 soil/earth // 흙 flower // 꽃 valley // 계곡 root // 뿌리 lake // 호수 star // 별 grass // 풀 leaf // 잎 air // 공기 sand // 모래 beach // 해변 wave // 파도 fire // 불 ice // 얼음 island // 섬 hill // 언덕 heat // 열 nature // 자연

N U M B E R S  ||  숫 자 0 // 공; 영 1 // 하나; 일 2 // 둘; 이 3 // 셋; 삼 4 // 넷; 사 5 // 다섯; 오 6 // 여섯; 육 7 // 일곱; 칠 8 // 여덟; 팔 9 // 아홉; 구 10 // 열; 십 11 // 열하나; 십일 12 // 열둘; 십이 13 // 열셋; 십삼 14 // 열넷; 십사 15 // 열다섯; 십오 16 // 열여섯; 십육 17 // 열일곱; 십칠 18 // 열여덟; 십팔 19 // 열아홉; 십구 20 // ���물; 이십 21 // 스물하나; 이십일 22 // 스물둘; 이십이 30 // 서른; 삼십 31 // 서른하나; 삼십일서른 32 // 서른둘; 삼십이 40 // 마흔; 사십 41 // 마흔하나; 사십일 42 // 마흔둘; 사십이 50 // 쉰; 오십 51 // 쉰하나; 오십일 52 // 쉰둘; 오십이 60 // 예순; 육십 61 // 예순하나; 육십일 62 // 예순둘; 육십이 70 // 일흔; 칠십 71 // 일흔하나; 칠십일 72 // 일흔둘; 칠십이 80 // 여든; 팔십 81 // 여든하나; 팔십일 82 // 여든둘; 팔십이 90 // 아흔; 구십 91 // 아흔하나; 구십일 92 // 아흔둘; 구십이 100 // 백 101 // 백일 102 // 백이 110 // 백십 111 // 백십일 1000 // 천 1001 // 천일 10000 // 만 100000 // 십만 1 million // 백만 1 billion // 십억 1st // 첫 번째 2nd // 두 번째 3rd // 세 번째 4th // 네 번째 5th // 다섯 번째 number // 숫자; 수사

P E O P L E  ||  사 람 들 son // 아들 daughter // 딸 mother // 어머니 father // 아버지 parent // 부모 baby // 아기; 애기 man // 남자 woman // 여자 brother // 오빠; 형; 남동생 sister // 언니; 누나; 여동생 family // 가족 grandfather // 할아버지 grandmother // 할머니 husband // 남편 wife // 아내; 와이프 king // 왕 queen // 여왕; 왕비 president // 대통령 neighbor // 이웃 boy // 소년 girl // 소녀 child // 아이; 어린이; 애 adult // 성인 human // 인간 friend // 친구 victim // 피해자 player // 선수 fan // 팬 crowd // 군중 person // 사람

P R O N O U N S  ||  대 명 사 I // 저; 나 you (singular) // 당신; 자네; 너 he // 그 she // 그녀 it // 그것 we // 저희; 우리 you (plural) // 당신들; 너희들; 여러분 they // 그들

S E A S O N S  ||  계 절 summer // 여름 spring // 봄 winter // 겨울 fall/autumn // 가을 season // 계절

S O C I E T Y  ||  사 회 religion // 종교 heaven // 천국 hell // 지옥 death // 죽음 medicine // 약 money // 돈 dollar // 달러 bill // 계산서 marriage // 결혼 wedding // 결혼식 team // 팀 race (ethnicity) // 민족 sex (the act) // 섹스; 성교 sex (gender) // 성별 murder // 살인 prison // 감옥 technology // 기술 energy // 에너지; 정력 war // 전쟁 peace // 평화 attack // 공격 election // 선거 magazine // 잡지 newspaper // 신문 poison // 독 gun // 총 sport // 스포츠 race (sport) // 경주 exercise // 운동 ball // 공 game // 게임; 경기 price // 가격; 값 contract // 계약서 drug // 마약 sign // 신호 science // 과학 God // 하나님; 하느님; 신

T I M E  ||  시 간 year // 해 month // 달 week // 주 day // 하루; 날 hour // 시간 minute // 분 second // 초 morning // 아침 afternoon // 오후 evening // 저녁 night // 밤 time // 시간

T R A N S P O R T A T I O N  ||  교 통 수 단 train // 기차 plane // 비행기 car // (자동)차 truck // 트럭 bicycle // 자전거 bus // 버스 boat // 배 ship // 배 tire // 타이어 gasoline // 휘발유 engine // 엔진 (train) ticket // 표 transportation // 교통수단

V E R B S  ||  동 사 to work // 일하다 to play // 놀다 to run // 뛰다; 달리다 to drive // 운전하다 to fly // 날다 to swim // 수영하다 to go // 가다 to stop // 멈추다; 그만하다 to follow // 따르다 to think // 생각하다 to speak/say // 말하다 to eat // 먹다 to drink // 마시다 to kill // 죽이다 to die // 죽다 to smile // 웃다 to laugh // 웃다 to cry // 울다 to buy // 사다 to pay // 내다; 결제하다 to sell // 팔다 to shoot (a gun) // 쏘다 to learn // 배우다 to jump // 뛰다 to smell // 냄새를 맡다 to hear (a sound) // 듣다 to listen (to music) // 듣다 to taste // 맛보다 to touch // 만지다 to see (a bird) // 보다 to watch (tv) // 보다 to kiss // 뽀뽀하다; 키스하다 to burn // 타다 to melt // 녹다 to dig // 파다 to explode // 폭발하다 to sit // 앉다 to stand // 서다 to love // 사랑하다 to pass by // 지나가다 to cut // 자르다 to fight // 싸우다 to lie down // 눕다 to dance // 춤을 추다 to sleep // 자다 to wake up // 일어나다 to sing // 노래하다 to count // 세다 to marry // 결혼하다 to pray // 기도하다 to win // 이기다 to lose // 지다; 잃어버리다 to mix/stir // 섞다; 젓다 to bend // 구부리다 to wash // 씻다 to cook // 요리하다 to open // 열다 to close // 닫다 to write // 쓰다; 적다 to call // 부르다; 전화하다 to turn // 돌리다 to build // 짓다 to teach // 가르치다 to grow // 자라다 to draw // 그리다 to feed // 먹이다 to catch // 잡다 to throw // 던지다 to clean // 청소하다 to find // 찾다 to fall // 떨어지다 to push // 밀다 to pull // 당기다 to carry // 나르다 to break // 부서지다; 깨다 to wear // 입다; 신다; 쓰다; 매다; 끼다; 차다 to hang // 걸다; 매달다 to shake // 흔들다 to sign // 서명하다; 사인하다 to beat // 치다 to lift // 올리다

practice on quizlet

[mss4msu]

“Do I Wanna Know?” (Chapter 1)

Summary: On a visit to a local nightclub, the lounge singer catches your eye. Soon becoming a regular at the club, the way you look on the dancefloor gets his attention. You begin to hear stories about the notorious crime lord who owns and operates the small nightclub. When your friends worry that you’ve gotten mixed up with a mobster, you wonder if it’s better to be left in the dark and find yourself asking, “Do I wanna know?” if you’re getting involved with one of the most revered mobsters in the city.

Pairing: Mobster!Bucky x Reader

Words: 2041

A/N: I went to an Arctic Monkeys concert and the lead singer had serious Seb GQ shoot vibez and I decided I needed a gangster fic featuring Arctic Monkeys songs so here it is. The fic (and this chapter specifically) are inspired by “Do I Wanna Know?”

Read the Full Story Here

The song in this chapter can be listened to here

“Come on, (Y/N), let’s gooooo!” your best friend, Jess, banged on the bathroom door.

“Give me one sec, I’m almost done!” you called back, applying one more coat of mascara and a last layer of red lipstick. You swung open the door of the bathroom.

“Dayyuumm!” Jess yelled at you, looking you up and down. You had chosen to wear your simple black dress that really accentuated your cleavage. “Alright, let’s go, Rachel’s meeting us there and we’re gonna be late because you took so long getting ready.”

“Oh, shut up,” you grabbed your purse off its hook, checking that your keys and wallet were inside and adding your phone. “How are we getting there?”

“I forgot you never go out,” Jess laughed at you, “I looked it up and the bus that stops right outside your place runs by it, so we’ll take that there and then grab a ride-share back here?”

“And why can’t we just take your car?”

“Because I don’t want to drive, because this place has the cheapest drinks in the area, so you know I’m going all in on those.”

“But the police just issued that new warning about public transportation at night….” you nervously replied. You had been reading through the newspaper this morning and seen that the mob activity in your area was increasing and the police were warning pedestrians to avoid particular bus routes, such as the one in front of your apartment, to cut down on potential innocent involvement.

“I’ve taken this exact bus route to this club before and I’ve survived. Plus, as long as we get on the bus now, there’s enough light that it shouldn’t be a problem. Now, come on, the bus gets here in 6 minutes and I don’t want to miss it and half to wait another 30.”

You didn’t bother arguing with her, and just followed her to the bus stop. You boarded the bus and couldn’t help but look anxiously around until Jess hit you to stop. She began chatting with you about meaningless things to keep your mind off the idea that mobsters could take over the bus at any minute.  

“Alright, this is our stop,” Jess said, grabbing your hand and pulling you off the bus.  You followed her like a lost puppy. You knew you could trust her, but your irrational side was terrified that mob guys were behind every corner and hidden in every shadow. You didn’t even know what a mob guy would look like, but you were terrified of them anyway.

You got to the door of the club and gave your IDs to the doorman. He seemed to linger on your ID longer than he did on Jess’s, but eventually he gave you a nod and opened the door for both of you to enter. A hostess met you inside the door and led you to the only open table in the very front of the dark club. With only dim candles to provide you light, you could hardly read the drink menu.

“(Y/N), stop trying to read that menu. Even your cheap ass can afford a drink here. There’s literally nothing over 10 dollars,” Jess snapped at you. “Rachel’s here!” She waved towards the door trying to catch Rachel’s eye in the dark room.

“Good luck getting her to see you. I don’t think I could even find my purse in here if I took it off.”

“Stop being a grump,” she told you as Rachel got to the table.

“Hey! (Y/N)! I can’t believe Jess got you to leave the house on a Friday for once! To what do we owe the honor?” Rachel asked you, sitting down.

“I had a long fucking week with Mr. Stark and I needed a night out,” you replied. When you were hired as Tony Stark’s personal assistant you had thought it would be a glamorous job full of cocktail hours and million dollar deals that you would take notes on; instead it was a whole lot of getting coffee, picking up dry cleaning, and late nights ensuring his many employees were properly scheduled for their work shifts. For whatever reason, Stark’s business had a high turnover of employees, so you had to continually update the schedule.

The waiter came to your table to take your orders. As you couldn’t read the menu, you simply asked for the cheapest thing that contained alcohol. Just a few minutes later a tallboy of PBR was placed in front of you. You downed it as the waiter gave Jess and Rachel their drinks, giving you a chance to order another.

“Damn, (Y/N)! I don’t even want to tell you to slow down!” Jess said.

“Yaaasss girl! This is gonna be a good night!” Rachel chimed in.

You caught up with both of them and learned all about their love lives and their work struggles. As your life basically revolved around Tony Stark, you didn’t have much to add to the conversation.

“Alright, It’s almost 9:00! (Y/N), get ready to see one of THE hottest men you have ever laid your eyes on!” Jess told you excitedly.

“I thought we came for the cheap drinks?” you asked confused.

“The cheap drinks are an added bonus, the lounge singer is the main event,” Rachel told you. “This man has the voice of an angel and the face of one too.”

“Alright, this was definitely a good night to come out then!” you replied, finishing your second beer and beginning to feel a buzz.

The lights on the stage came up, and a silence fell over the crowd. The curtain opened and you saw a tall, muscular man in a well-fitting suit standing behind a microphone, joined on the stage by a bass, a piano, and a drummer.

“Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to the stage, The White Wolf and The Howlers,” an announcer voice said from somewhere off-stage. Applause filled the club.

“A one, a two, a one, two, three, four,” the man at the microphone, whom you assumed was ‘The White Wolf’, counted in with snaps. The drums began and the bass and piano joined in to create the beat. The White Wolf swayed side to side, feeling the music. He began to sing:

Have you got colour in your cheeks? Do you ever get the fear that you can't shift the type That sticks around like summat in your teeth? Are there some aces up your sleeve? Have you no idea that you're in deep? I’ve dreamt about you nearly every night this week How many secrets can you keep? 'Cause there's this tune I found That makes me think of you somehow And I play it on repeat Until I fall asleep Spilling drinks on my settee

You most certainly did have color in your cheeks as you audibly gulped, looking at Jess and Rachel. They quietly laughed at your response and Rachel whispered, “told ya!” in you ear. You could not believe how incredibly handsome this man was and couldn’t figure out how his voice could sound so smooth and yet slightly (and very sexily) raspy at the same time. Everything about him was perfect and you turned your attention back to him, not wanting to ever part your eyes from his face.

(Do I wanna know?) If this feeling flows both ways? (Sad to see you go) Was sorta hoping that you'd stay (Baby, we both know) That the nights were mainly made For saying things that you can't say tomorrow day

Crawling back to you Ever thought of calling when you’ve had a few? ‘Cause I always do Maybe I’m too busy being yours to fall for somebody new Now I’ve thought it through Crawling back to you

If you didn’t know better, you could’ve sworn that his eyes were locked on your just as tightly as yours were on him. It sent a tingling feeling through your stomach and up your spine.

So have you got the guts? Been wondering if your heart’s still open And if so, I wanna know what time it shuts Simmer down and pucker up I’m sorry to interrupt, it’s just I’m constantly on the cusp Of trying to kiss you I don’t know if you feel the same as I do We could be together if you wanted to

Now you knew he was staring at you as he mocked a kiss in your direction, causing Jess and Rachel to squeal. You had always laughed at those old romantic stories of women swooning, but you were convinced you could swoon any minute, as you were suddenly feeling very hot.

(Do I wanna know?) If this feeling flows both ways? (Sad to see you go) Was sorta hoping that you'd stay (Baby, we both know) That the nights were mainly made For saying things that you can't say tomorrow day

Crawling back to you Ever thought of calling when you’ve had a few? ‘Cause I always do Maybe I’m too busy being yours to fall for somebody new Now I’ve thought it through Crawling back to you

(Do I wanna know?) If this feeling flows both ways? (Sad to see you go) Was sorta hoping that you'd stay (Baby, we both know) That the nights were mainly made For saying things that you can't say tomorrow day

(Do I wanna know?) Too busy being yours to fall (Sad to see you go) Ever thought of calling, darling? (Do I wanna know?) Do you want me crawling back to you?

The lights on the stage went out and the curtains closed.

“What I wouldn’t give to have him crawling back to me right now,” you moaned to Jess and Rachel, causing them to both giggle. “Is that it? He just does one?” You were practically begging him back on stage.

“He always opens the night and then a few other acts come on and then he closes the show,” Jess told you.

“Holy shit, he was amazing,” you gushed.

“Yeah, he never disappoints,” Rachel replied.

You motioned for the watier to come to your table, “Dear sir, another round for the three of us on me in honor of my introduction to this very fine,” you looked at the stage, “establishment!”

The waiter brought you the drinks and you slid him a large tip, feeling extra generous now that you had been blessed by the voice of the angelic White Wolf. The rest of the night dragged on as you waited for the White Wolf to return to the stage for his closing act.

“Ok, this should be him up next!” Jess told you.

Your heart started racing as the curtain closed as the group currently on the stage finished.

“Ladies and gentlemen, we regret to announce that The White Wolf and The Howlers have been called away to another gig. Our closing act for this evening will now be The Freightcars!”

“What the fuck!” You immediately covered your mouth, not meaning to swear out loud, but you had had 2 drinks too many and couldn’t control your language.

Jess and Rachel laughed. Rachel pulled out her phone to order a ride-share to pick you up.

“Come on, (Y/N), let’s get you home,” Jess grabbed your arm and helped you up, steering you towards the door.

The ride back to your apartment was filled with you gushing about how incredibly hot you thought the White Wolf was and how you needed to have him in your life. Jess and Rachel fed your obsession, trying to help you find him on social media. They successfully found the band’s Instagram page and you immediately liked it and in a drunken haze liked every single photo they had ever posted.

“Rachel, Jess, thank you for a wonderful evening that has changed my life forever. Same time next week?” You asked, unlocking your door and hugging them goodbye before they went to Jess’s car.

“Sure thing!” Rachel replied, laughing.

“I’m glad we’ve found something that’ll get you out of the house and away from the office!” Jess giggled, getting in the car.

You laid in bed scrolling through The White Wolf and The Howlers’ Instagram until you fell asleep.

CHAPTER TWO

[missblanchette]

Hippocratic Oath [1/4]

Series: Hypnosis Mic

Characters: Jinguji Jakurai/Kannonzaka Doppo

Rating: PG for language

Summary: The fact of the matter was that a relationship between a doctor and a patient was unethical. Sooner or later, one of them had to speak up about it. (Or: Jakurai and Doppo work out their Feelings™.)

Words: 2115

Notes: Hi hi~! I have some free time finally, so I wanted to write something for these two Awkward Old Men haha JakuDoppo’s such a sweet pair to me, so I wanted to share my feels for them hehe ^-^

ko-fi // You can read this on AO3 | Ch. 2 | Thank you so much for reading, I hope you enjoy~! (*＾▽＾)／

Ch. 1: Doctor’s Recommendation

One of the most terrifying things in life -- if not the most terrifying -- was hearing the phrase "I'd like to talk to you." Especially when coming from somebody you respected a lot. Double especially when no context framed it.

So suffice to say when Doppo heard Jakurai utter those words, his heart started racing at a hundred kilometers per second and his palms grew as clammy as the shellfish down in Yokohama's Umi no Koen. Terrible outcomes stacked upon horrible outcomes as he racked his mind for anything wrong he’d done recently. There shouldn't have been any reason Jakurai wanted to talk to him, but maybe that was exactly why. Because he couldn't notice his own screw ups, because he'd been careless, because he couldn't do anything right --

"Doppo-kun, please let me continue," Jakurai said, his low, sonorous voice breaking him out of his disastrously derailing train of thought. Touch feather light, Jakurai's fingertips rested atop his knuckles that had grown white when he'd balled his hands into fists. Doppo's mouth clamped shut before he let any more of his ramblings loose. "I assure you that it's nothing bad, but it is a rather... personal matter."

"Okay," was all Doppo could say that wouldn't send him into another downward spiral. "So what is it?"

Retracting his hand, Jakurai steepled his fingers as he took a breath. In turn, Doppo clasped his hands together, thumb running over the spot Jakurai had touched. Jakurai glanced to the side ever so briefly, his lips parting slightly before closing -- a cycle that repeated about three times.

"Would you like to order something first? I invited you to dinner, after all." He gestured to the menus, still not quite looking at him.

Despite his inner protests yelling at him to get whatever the hell this was over, Doppo mumbled an agreement. He hardly looked at the menu, already knowing his usual order of tonkatsu and beer, but pretended to leaf through it anyways. In his peripheral, Jakurai was as focused on the menu as he was; that was to say, not at all. The chatter of the other patrons and clatter of plates and glassware filled their silence after they'd relayed their orders to the waiter. Forcing yet failing to keep his nerves at bay, Doppo concentrated on Jakurai's general direction like it was an anchor of sorts amongst the racket of the restaurant.

"Forgive me, Doppo-kun. I'm still not sure how to approach the subject."

"You're fine, Dr. Jinguji,” he said, biting back his own apology. If anything, he could appease Jakurai by trying to follow his advice of not over-apologizing. Key word: trying.

Small talk was never necessary for them, at least for Doppo. True, during his appointments, he would spill everything from how his body refused to cooperate with him to his shitty day at work, but Jakurai would never push further than necessary. Outside of their sessions, when it was just them as Matenrou, Jakurai's presence was enough for him. No words were needed except for the raps they spit and the lyrics they sang. Living within Shinjuku's cacophony on a day-to-day basis, the quiet was a blessing and there was no greater blessing than someone who understood that like he did.

But right now, the silence on Jakurai's end suffocated him. Even after they'd received their orders, Jakurai didn't touch his food nor attempted to speak. He merely wore a pensive expression, eyes downcast. Doppo took a sip of his beer and toyed at his food to keep busy with something other than his thoughts.

"Doppo-kun," Jakurai called out to him. “This may sound very blunt, but I say this with your best interests in mind. I think you should find another doctor --”

Doppo's chopsticks clinked loudly against his plate.

“-- because I can no longer care for you properly.”

"What? " He cringed as he heard his voice crack. "W-What do you mean? You're a great doctor!" Then, in a hushed tone, "I trust you..."

A small smile graced Jakurai's face, though it held hints of self-deprecation.

"And that is exactly why you should seek treatment somewhere else. I do not want to take advantage of the trust you have in me."

"I don't -- I don't understand."

"I believe our relationship is no longer appropriate for a doctor and patient."

"If this is because we're in the same group, then I'll just quit --"

"No," Jakurai said, shoulders tensing. Seldom was it that Jakurai spoke with such severity that Doppo flinched. Posture relaxing, Jakurai cleared his throat. "My apologies for that outburst, but you are an important member of Matenrou. I would never ask you to leave."

"Then what is it?"

For a moment, Jakurai wasn't the unwavering pillar he'd always looked up to. To anyone passing by their table, he might've appeared calm and collected but Doppo could see how his fingers tapped against each other and hear how uneasy his breaths were. Maybe he'd started hallucinating, though, since Jakurai's cheeks appeared red as well.

"I... have feelings for you." Jakurai's azure gaze met his. "Feelings a doctor shouldn't have for his patient."

"What."

As soon as that came out, Doppo slapped a hand to his face and buried his head as far into his palm as he could. An extremely dumb response to a confession, was what that was.

If it was even a real confession.

Any second now, he expected to hear Jakurai say that he was kidding or break into laughter or some sort of combination of the two. Go figure he'd humiliate him right before breaking some shitty news, like he'd been lying earlier and was going to kick him out of Matenrou or that his feelings were actually of hatred and he'd just been putting up with him all along. Hell, Hifumi was probably in on this and gave Jakurai the game plan on how exactly to mess with him. Right, Doppo told himself, this was all some sick joke to get him out of their crew.

But when Doppo risked a peek through his fingers, Jakurai was looking at him with a soft expression. No malice hid beneath his eyes nor any ill intent behind his reassuring smile. Doppo was sure of little in the world, but one thing he knew for certain was that Jinguji Jakurai would not lie to him. And that fact weighed heavily on him.

"Sorry, I'm just... you're serious?"

"Yes, Doppo-kun. I'm completely serious." Jakurai folded his hands together, not once breaking eye contact. "I do not expect a response right away nor do I expect you to return my feelings, but I thought it would be better for the both of us if I told you."

"Better," he said, but all Doppo wanted to do now was combust into a million tiny pieces. Unfortunately, his wishes never came true and he was still very much intact in this restaurant on a Monday evening where he sat across from Jakurai. Any other person would've been ecstatic to receive a confession from someone they admired so much, but instead he felt like he’d been dumped into the Arctic Ocean in the dead of winter. He'd been fine being with Jakurai as a patient, as a division group member, and (he liked to think) as a friend. Any fantasies of a more intimate relationship had simply been that: fantasies. There were no worries about any repercussions in having fantasies, no having to deal with shifts in the status quo. As long as he kept them to himself, he could keep Jakurai in his life without much fear of ruining things between them. His entire life had been spent settling for less because he deserved no more than less; what he had with Jakurai was no exception.

Except now there was a possibility for those fantasies to become a reality and that possibility sent him into a tizzy. Of all the people in this world, Jakurai chose him . And he couldn't possibly fathom why.

"I..." don't know what to say. "I..." think you've made a mistake. "I..." am not worth your time.

Doppo scrambled for his belongings and stood up.

"I have to go."

"Doppo-kun --"

"I'm terribly sorry, but thank you very much for inviting me! I'll just pay for my order and go," he said all in one breath while frantically searching for his wallet.

"There's no need for that. I invited you, so I'll pay for you."

He grabbed a couple of bills after hastily opening his wallet up, paying no attention to which ones they were. Whatever he threw down would cover it. Probably.

"No, I've got it --"

"Doppo-kun," Jakurai said, a sense of finality in his tone. Doppo's head snapped up to him. More often than not, he wondered why Jakurai needed a Hypnosis Mic in the first place when his voice was hypnotic enough as it was. "Please, allow me. It's the least I can do for you."

Glancing back and forth between his wallet and Jakurai, Doppo stood still with more excuses rushing to escape his mouth. “I don’t deserve it,” he wanted to scream; “Save your money for something worthwhile,” he wanted to shout. But with Jakurai looking at him so intently, so earnestly, he choked them down.

"I'm sorry for wasting your time." He bowed as deeply as he could, head banging against the table.

"Are you okay?"

"I’m sorry! Thank you again!" he said, the sting but an afterthought as he rose back to full height. It wasn't like he hadn't experienced worse pains before.

He froze when he caught sight of Jakurai staring at him, brows knitted in concern and lips quirked downwards. Of course, Doppo thought, what Jakurai felt for him wasn't fondness but pity. Before Jakurai could get another word in, Doppo turned away.

"Good night, Doctor!"

He made it to the train station in record time.

Knocking out was Doppo's typical plan of action as soon as he got home and tonight was no different. Things didn't always go according to plan, however, and another bout of insomnia struck. Laying stiffly on his bed, he found himself too restless to close his eyes and his body too overbearing to exist in.

Hifumi had already left for work by the time he'd returned home, something Doppo usually wouldn't mind but his thoughts screamed far too loudly in the silence of their apartment -- thoughts of how badly he'd screwed up that evening that refused to die. Nights like these made him wish Hifumi was here to yap his ear off. Groaning, Doppo grabbed his pillow and smashed it against his face as if cutting off his air supply would solve all his problems.

His stomach growled and he pressed the pillow harder against his nose, remembering that he hadn't touched the food that Jakurai paid for earlier. That alone should be testament enough to the fact that he didn't deserve Jakurai. To take advantage of his kindness and hospitality without giving anything in return, he was absolutely pathetic as pathetic could be.

Even more pathetic was that he'd just left him there without a proper response.

To say he didn't have any feelings for Jakurai whatsoever would be a lie, but therein lay the problem: he had no sense of these feelings, what to make of them, nor what to believe. Rarely did anyone treat him with compassion, so of course he'd take to Jakurai like the night dwellers to Kabukicho. Yet surely he was simply one of many who received Jakurai’s kindness. He was a doctor; sympathy and gentleness were part of his job. He treated everyone the same way and it was Doppo's own fault for construing his behavior as anything meaningful. Simple infatuation was all it was, having overvalued a relationship that meant the world to him but little to Jakurai. He'd long grown used to Hifumi's affection and in time, too, he would grow used to Jakurai's care and see him as he should've been: as a doctor, as a friend, and as a leader. Nothing more than that. Never anything more than that.

He repeated that to himself like a mantra. Any romantic feelings he held for Jakurai were not real; he was not good enough for a man like Jakurai; Jakurai would eventually grow sick and tired of him; he and Jakurai, he and Jakurai, he and Jakurai --

Doppo slid the pillow down from his face, gasping for air like a fish for water. Thoughts of Jakurai would not leave him throughout the entire night, and he couldn't decide if it was a blessing or a curse.

[thoughtsofdarc]

The Butterfly Effect - Part 5 - The Ex

Bucky Barnes x Reader 

Words: 1450

A/N: This took me forever to write... Almost 4 hours for just about 1500 words. I’m getting so frustrated, that my hands don’t work proberly. The pain ain’t getting worse, so i take that as a good sign, but now it needs to leave, and take the numbness with it too.  Anyway... Enjoy this next chapter - We are working our way through the clichés... But who are we trying to be kidding? They are clichés for a reason right ;)  

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4

Bucky is the perfect man. He's sweet and caring, always asking how I'm doing and is actually listening to what I tell him. He's funny and makes me laugh over and over again, the more he can make me laugh the happier he seems to be. He's the perfect gentleman, observant, present and making me feel important, even if I'm talking about boring stuff like laundry.

He's sooo handsome, like taken out of a photo shoot for some high end fashion magazine. Sometimes, I even feel a tad to normal, even boring, compared to him. But he always acts like I'm the most beautiful girl in the world.

Not to mention, he is the best kisser I have ever laid my lips on. He takes my breath away, and makes me longing for more whenever he leaves, giving me butterflies in my stomach just by thinking of him.

Everything I've dreamed of. Except, I'm not really sure where I got him.

"So, have you... you know... done it yet?" Natasha cocks an eyebrow, a teasing smirk on her lips as she sips her coffee.

We are sitting at the coffee shop again, the one where Bucky gave me his number, hidden under a cookie.

I raise my eyebrows in surprise and look around to see if anyone heard her very direct and very private question. Luckily for me, it doesn't seem like anyone is paying us attention.

"No! What, no...? No!" The words come out as a stutter, and I cringe when I hear just how flustered I sound. Way to go y/n, that will definitely make her believe you.

 Natasha laughs as she squints and point a finger at me "You just said no, tree times. Don't hold back on me... how was it?" She leans in, ready to hear all the juicy details. So typically Nat!

 I sigh, deeply as I play with the handle of the coffee mug.

"I'm serious Nat... We haven't. I'm not even sure that we are official. I mean, we've been out more than enough to think we are, but... It's like it never goes any further than dates, holding hands and mind-blowing goodbye kisses" I look at her, sadder than I intent to.

 "Oh Sweetie! I'm sorry... I thought you..." She trails off and I nod, understanding what she means.

"Well, if he can't get his ass in gear and officially make you his, I see no other choice than for us to go out and have some fun tonight. There's this new bar a few blocks from my work and I've been dying to go. It's been ages since the last time we went out, and also this is going to be one of the last times having a girls night out before I officially becomes Mrs. Barton"

 "Nat, I don't know..." I start, but she cuts me off very quickly.

"Y/n, I'm not saying you have to find another guy... it's just a girls night out. Clint is working late, and I really want to go... Please?" She looks at me with her puppy dog eyes as she tries to hide her smile. She knows I can't refuse, and yelp out a celebrating "Yes!" when I agree to go.

 "Y/n, stop fussing, you look great!" Natasha swats my hand away from the hem of the dress she has lent me.

"But it's so short!" I whine and tug on the fabric again, trying to make it cover a bit more of my thighs but to no avail.

It does look great, and it hugs my curves all the right places. My ass looks great and with the high heels matching the dress, I look like a million dollars.

But this outfit will get me attention and something inside of me keeps reminding me, that I don't want anyone else's attention but Bucky's.

 Once seated at the corner of the bar, after having ordered a drink each, I relax a bit. There's a cozy atmosphere. I'm typing out a message, only listening halfheartedly to something Nat is saying, barely hitting send before the phone is snatched from my hands. "No phones!" she says sternly and put it in her purse.

"But, I was just texting Bucky, letting him know..." I start, but she cuts me off quickly by adding "And no, Bucky! This is girl's night out, remember?"  

 I smile sheepishly and nod. Clinking our glasses together, we are already deep in conversation again.

 "Y/n?!" I hear a familiar voice and immediately my eyes widen, cringing when I see the recognition in Natasha's eyes.

I turn around, and surely there he is, the one ex I don't want to meet ever again.

 "Brock, hi" the words are short and not inviting to further talk, but Brock being Brock he ignores the clear dismissal in my voice.

 "Y/n, it is you! I thought my eyes deceived me... You look fine" His words are slippery and hold more than just a compliment. That guy never did want anything else but my body.

"Still just the two of you like always, hmm?" He's eyes roam both Natasha's and my own body like they were food and he was a starving man "I thought I heard you had gotten married Tash. Settling down in the boring life as a housewife? And yet, here you both are just like the old days. Nothing's changed huh?"

 Natasha's eyes are hard and cold, she never did like Brock, and looking back I don't blame her.

She holds up her hand, flashing the beautiful ring that Clint gave her "Everything has changed, Brock. Now go away... we're having a girl's night here"

 He laughs, ignoring her completely as he moves closer to me, putting his hand on the small of my back, his eyes roaming my cleavage "Let me buy you a drink Y/n"

He signals to the bartender to make new drinks, even though I say no.

 Brock never was one to listen to others. And my discomfort is clearly showing to everybody in the room, except from him.

 When Brock puts his other hand on my thigh, Natasha is just about to jump up and yank him away from me, but someone else steps in close and lean in to kiss my cheek. Doing so, he comes in between Brock an myself, making Brock have to let go of me.

 "Hi Doll! I'm sorry I'm late. I got here as fast as I could, but traffic was a pain" Bucky's velvet voice rings sweetly in my ear, and I can't stop myself from grinning widely when I look up at him. Even Natasha looks happy to see him interrupting.

 He leans in and plants a quick kiss on my lips, making me sigh out loud before he turns to Brock and extend his hand.

"Hi, I'm Bucky, y/n's boyfriend... And you are?" The words are cold as ice, and leave no room for Brock to question what is happening.

 "I'm leaving..." He mumbles and turns around to walk away.

 I beam up at Bucky, who looks like he is watching a cockroach following Brock with his eyes. Natasha smirks looking from me, to Bucky and back to me, before she says

"I'll be right back, I have to give Clint a call" She winks at me as she stands up and makes her way towards the ladies room.

 "Thank you for saving me there..." Looking at Bucky, seeing how handsome he looks in dark jeans, tight navy-blue pullover and his hair pulled up into a bun. His blue eyes meet mine and his lips curl up in the smile I've come to love and adore.

 "Couldn't let that beast put his hands on you, Snow White" He answers and I have to giggle at his words.. "Wrong Disney Princess, Park Guy"

 His eyes wander over me. For a second I swear his eyes takes a darker shade of blue and he clench his jaw as if he is holding something back before he whispers "God, you are beautiful!"

 The waiter comes over and places the two drinks that Brock ordered before, in front of us as he says "One beer for the gentleman and one 'Blue Butterfly' for the lady" before he smiles shortly and quickly turns away to takes the next order.

 We both chuckle when we hear the name of the drink. I let my finger run over the cool glass before I turn to look at him, a shy smile on my lips

"So... My boyfriend, huh??"

 Bucky's eyes looks deeply into mine, his smile never leaving his lips as he puts his hand on my cheek

"Only if you'll have me?"

Part 6

Tags:

@bexboo616 @happylittlethingsss @mizzzpink @fangirling-all-the-way-tbh​ @owhatshername1 @sinceimetyou @alextittle @todorath @tbetz0341 @fortheloveoflamp @whimsicalatbest @buckysjuicyplums @mynameisreallycoolbutitstoolong @kalisaysfuck @shitmymomsay @mjgonzalez-01 @projectxhappiness @kuollut-talven @lol-haha-joke @caplansteverogers @loki7ms @who-cares-rn @cc8302 @buckysarm4 @altyex

[fhujami]

My other half | Chapter 3 [Sam Drake x Reader]

Pairing: Reader x Original male character, Samuel Drake x Reader

Summary: When destiny chose to call you, in the middle of the wedding hassle, you were excited to went to your last adventure before settling down.

You thought, that after going on the last adventure, you might realise that your life as a treasure hunter was over, and maybe you were ready to start live a ‘normal life’.

But when you had been sucked in to adventure to find Henry Avery’s treasure with your long time friend Nathan, and his mysterious brother Sam, you started to wonder that if stable life was what you were meant to have.

Especially when Samuel Drake felt like he was the missing part of your soul. And you truly needed to fight with yourself and find out what you really wanted with your life.

Words: 1893

A/N: Cursive words between ‘these’ are your thoughts.

Tags: @jodiereedus22  @random-aya @dragonjedihobbit @missdictatorme

My other half

Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4 - Chapter 5 - Chapter 6 - Chapter 7 - Chapter 8 - Chapter 9 - Chapter 10 - 19 - Chapter 20 - 29 - Chapter 30 -

Chapter 3

You knocked Nate’s room door, and crossed your arms to your chest and waited. You heard him mumbling something inside, and his steps coming closer. You knew he’s going to refuse you’re going with them, but you would not let him to leave without you.

When he opened the door, he was little surprised to see you there, maybe he was waiting Sully to come back, or his brother, who you saw leaving Nate’s room not long after you and Sully did. Nate didn’t say anything, neither did you.

You stepped past him to inside his room while looking him with your brows furrowed, walking to the table and taking his notebook.

“So, fill me in.” You finally said.

“What? No, no, no [Y/N], you’re not coming with us.”

“Shut up Nate. I’m pissed at you for lying me and leaving me out of this. I’m coming.”

“No you -”

“Fill me in. If you won’t let me come, I’ll stay up all night, waiting for you to leave and follow you, okay?” you hissed to him and gave him a cold look. He knew that you’ll do that. You had done it before.

“Sully takes Elena back home.” You continued after turning to the table to look at the maps and notes.

You heard how Nate got closer to you. You felt how he was nervous and anxious. But if he wanted to talk, he’ll talk. You knew pushing him is no use.

“So, Henry Avery huh?” You asked when he stood next to you.

He gave you fast details about what they had found and where to head in the morning. He gave you his notebook, so you could learn about the treasure little bit by yourself. You were one of the only people who he might let to see his notebook. It was like a diary to him, even there were no secrets but it was his thing.

“Okay. I’ll look this through. I’ll see you in the morning.” You said and headed to the door.

“[Y/N] wait!”

You turned to Nate, who brushed his hand through his hair, clearly wanting to say something but he just didn’t knew what. You waited and gave him some time to organize his thoughts.

“How is she?”

You gave him a small, but gentle smile.

“Pissed. Hurt. She just need some time. I made a promise that I’ll take you home safely, so she sure is waiting for you.”

Nate nodded, and looked little relieved. You looked him for a moment before you opened the door and walked back to your room.

When you opened your room’s door, you saw how Elena was already sleeping in her bed, poor one had clearly cried herself to sleep, based from the tear traces on her cheek. You sighed, threw Nate’s notebook to your bed and walked next to her, to cover her with blanket and kissed gently her hair.

You laid down to your bed, hiding your face into your elbow and wondered what the hell of a day this has been.

You laid there for a while, before you sat up and chose to head to the small bar next to the motel. You needed couple of beers so you could sleep better, and to be honest, you weren’t that tired not just yet. The adrenaline were already veining in you, when you knew that in the morning you start your one last adventure - and you were going to do it with Nate. You grabbed Nate’s notebook from the bed, and left the room to head to the bar.

Gladly bar was quiet and there were only like ten people inside. You can have your couple of beers and examine Nate’s notebook in peace. You walked to the counter, put some coins on it and ordered your beer while tapping the counter with your fingernails. Your mind was racing when you tried to organize your thoughts and get good picture what was waiting for you.

You sat to the table in the middle of the bar and took a sip from your beer, while opening the notebook, starting to go through the pages.

Nate was always good making notes, and his drawing skills were really useful sometimes, you saw some stretched which helped you to understand and saw the whole picture much better. You smiled yourself when you looked down the notes - you had really missed this. You had really thought you will never got the chance to go to treasure hunting - especially with Nate.

You went through the pages, learned that they had already been in Italy and Scotland before Madagascar. You shook your head, while your eyes were roaming through the small notes in the pages. You chuckled once in awhile to Nate’s little funny or sarcastic note’s on the pages.

When you had finished the last page, you ordered another beer, and put the notebook away.

‘400 millions in gold and jewels. And half goes to Hector Alcazar. Jesus Nate’s brother is one big troublemaker.’ You thought and chuckled little to yourself. Well, Nate use to be same. And if you were honest, he still was troublemaker, on the other hand he wouldn’t be in this situation now. Waiter brought you your beer and you gave him couple bills, ask him to serve him another beer in a moment.

You glanced when you heard someone talking behind you.

“Y/N right?” You turned and saw Sam standing behind you. You nodded and turned your gaze forward and stared your beer. Without asking permission to join you, he sat other side of the table and you rolled your eyes. ‘God what an asshole.’

“What do you want?” You asked. Even though you were going to spend time with him for God knows how long, you didn’t want to see him right now.

“I was hoping you could stay out of this.” Sam said, his voice being deep and little bit angry. Clearly he had talked with Nate, because now he tried to consume to get out of the whole trip. You looked back at his hazel colored eyes when he stared at you with his brows furrowed.

You leaned to the table closer to him, without letting your eyes off from his.

“No.”

“This has nothing to do with you.”

You chuckled and leaned back to your chair.

“It doesn’t matter. Nate already agreed that I’ll join you.”

“Oh, it felt like that you left him no choice when I talked to him.”

“I just wanna make sure Nate is coming home in one piece.”

“Why would you think I won’t made sure of that?” He asked and took a sip from his beer. You rounded your bottle between your hands.

“Well, Sam Drake. I don’t know you. I don’t know if you can be trusted.”

“I’m his brother.” He interrupted you and you chuckled again and took a sip from your beer.

“Yeah, brother who he hadn’t mention all these years.” You saw how his eyes darkened and face frowned. That hit him hard. You could see that in his eyes.

He sighed and laid back on his chair and didn’t say anything. You looked his face, trying to learn him. His nose looked like it had broke many times, probably from all the fights in prison. He had a small scar on his cheek below his right eye, it looked fresh, but also that it had been there for a while now.

But his eyes. In his eyes there was something that bothered you.

The more you look at him, the more you noted more similarity from Nate. Even they looked totally different, there was still something that made them to look like brothers. He also looked little shabby, with his couple day stubble and messy brown hair. ‘But yet he is handsome… Wait, what are you doing? You’re engaged, you’re suppose to get married! You can’t look him in that way!’ You thought and was about to touch your ring in your finger, but you remember you took it off so you wouldn’t lost it.

“So, fifteen years in prison huh? How did you end up there anyway? I’ll guess Nate was there too, or something, cause he told me he’s been in Panamanian jail before.”

You broke the silence and looked at Sam’s body language. You saw immediately the change in his eyes, they got dark, hurt and broken.

“We were looking clue’s to Avery’s treasure. We worked a guy named Rafe back then, he’s after this treasure with Shoreline now too. But yeah, back then, he bribed us in, we were suppose to walk there away but…”

He stopped for a while. He changed his position again and you followed his every movement. How his eyes moved, how his fingers twitched or how he licked his lips.

“Things didn’t go as planned and I got shot and Nathan assume I was dead.”

You nodded, that must have been really hard to Nate, maybe it was too painful to talk about his brother? And that was why he never mentioned him. Either way, he will tell you whole story when he’s ready to it.

“Do you have any experience about this?” Sam asked and broke the silence between you two what had started to flow again, while he roamed his eyes on your body to learn about you. You turned your eyes on him and looked him under your eyebrows.

“I have been hanging around with Nate when he was still treasure hunting, almost fourteen years if i remember right. So yes, I have experience about this.” You said and took another sip from your beer and smiled pleasantly. “Do you?”

Sam chuckled little offended.

“Please, I teached him everything he know.”

“Oh so you teached him how to be a lying bastard?” You didn’t think that of Nate, but you wanted to see what kind of person his brother was.

Sam’s face paled a little, just enough you to see it in the dime bar. You usually saw from people when they were lying, specially when you pushed the beehive, and Nate’s brother was no exception. He was hiding something. And you were going to find out what.

“What do you mean by lying bastard?” Sam’s voice sounded weak and squeaky. You hummed by yourself, that tone only confirmed your suspicions.

“Well if you teached him everything he knows, then he had learn from you how to lie to your love ones.”

Sam snorted and poured the rest of his beer down his throat and hitted his bottle back to the table and stood up. He leaned over the table, and his face were just inches away from yours. You could feel his warm breath against your face. He smelled cigarette, not only his breath, but also his clothes and his hair. That made your throat dry.

“Don’t drink too much so you won’t miss the boat. It’ll be shame.” He tilted his head and lifted corner of his lip to a small smile, before he turned and left. When you saw the door closing behind him, you realized you had hold your breath, so you gasped to get some air into your lungs.

Sam Drake, was the most mysterious man you had ever met. And you were going to find out what he was hiding.

[folklore-musings]

If I Can’t Have You Part 1

Summary: Very AU. Archie Andrews is dead. The only leading suspect is one of his oldest and dearest friends, Jughead Jones. Betty Cooper is forced on a mission to find Jughead and bring him in, getting herself kidnapped throughout the process. Everything is a lie and nothing is the truth in this twisted tale of love and death.

Read on AO3 here

A/N:  So I’ve been playing around with this idea in my head for a while now. You can all thank @jandjsalmon for this side of Jughead. She introduced to me a world of Dark Jughead that I wasn’t aware I needed in my life. The prologue here will be the only chapter to include graphic scenes of violence. From here on out it will be a little easier to read I promise. I hope you like it! Side note - this whole first part is in italics because it happened in the past, just in case you were wondering why I wrote it that way.

It was like any other Friday night. Archie Andrews sat along with the other cronies at the bar, nursing a half empty beer bottle. His ginger hair was pushed back in a way that screamed, “I’m trying too hard to make it seem like I’m not trying at all.” His hand was on the knee of the leggy brunette beside him, their heads bent together in a private conversation. The woman threw her head back and laughed, and the man in the beanie at the corner booth wondered what was so incredibly funny.

Red hot anger coursed through Jughead Jones’ veins as he watched the scene unfold before him. He wanted to take the ginger out then and there in the Starlight Bar, but he had to hold himself back. ‘Just a few more hours’ he would remind himself. Jughead made sure the waiter kept the glasses of coke and the fry baskets coming. This was a stake out unlike any other he’d been on before.

Usually Jughead would never let himself be caught dead in the Starlight. His domain was the Whyte Wyrm, back in their home town of Riverdale. But he had more important things to do than toss back a few beers and play some pool. He had only one thing on his mind and it was getting Archie alone.

Jughead took a break from staring sulkily at Archie and went to the bathroom. Three cokes later and he couldn’t hold it any longer. He held his head low, staring at his shoes as he walked past the ginger hoping Archie wouldn’t notice him. Just when he thought he’d cleared customs Archie called over his back, “Jughead! What are you doing out here?” His voice was higher than normal and he quickly removed his hand from the brunette’s leg.

“Hey Arch.” He started out, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. “I just decided it was time for a change of scenery.” Jughead’s eyes flickered to the brunette in the tiny black dress. “I guess that makes two of us, huh?” He turned on his heel and continued for the restroom, not bothering to hear Archie’s reply.

“Wait Jughead, I can explain!” Jughead ignored his old friend and kept on walking.

When he returned from taking a piss Archie and the nameless girl were gone. Swearing under his breath he left more than enough cash on the table to cover his bill and headed outside, hoping he could catch them before they left.

Thanking his lucky stars Jughead watched with livid eyes as Archie held the door open for the woman, giving her ass a tight squeeze before shutting the door behind her. Jughead snuck around the building to his beat up old Cadillac and hopped in, waiting a few minutes and following them into the night.

They parked outside an old brick house and let the car idle. Jughead was careful to park one street over, attempting to stay undetected by the pair. He imagined what they were doing; probably tangled up in each other’s arms as they fucked on the curb outside her house. It figured she’d be a cheating whore. And to think Jughead thought opposites attracted. Definitely not in this twisted storyline.

He tore his thoughts away from Archie and pulled a book out from his glove box, wondering how much longer he’d have to wait. His fingers started to shake and he reached for the pack of smokes wasting away in the pocket of his leather jacket. He couldn’t risk the jitters. Not now when literally everything was on the line. After tonight there would be no going back to the life he lived before. But it was worth every promise that was yet to come. Jughead would finally have a chance to be happy. He took a few relaxing puffs from his and threw his head forward on his steering wheel, trying to steady his racing heart.

The squealing of tires on the asphalt pulled Jughead back to reality. “Fuck.” He muttered, turning the key in the ignition and racing after Archie, desperately trying to catch up. He couldn’t have gotten far, but the sooner the dirty deed was done, the better.

Familiar taillights of Archie’s mustang soon appeared in Jughead’s windshield and he breathed a sigh of relief. His heart was hammering away in his chest, refusing to let up. He could hear the blood flow in his ears and his fingers began to throb. In need of a distraction he turned the volume up on the radio, anything to drown out his thoughts.

Was he really about commit the worst felony known to mankind? To take the life of another living, breathing human being? His world was spinning, turning upside down and his stomach clenched in thousands of tiny little knots. He cursed himself for eating two baskets of fries. Ketchup was not going to taste very good when it undoubtedly came back up.

Jughead sped up to Achie’s vehicle, the brake lights gleaming like rubies under the dark night sky. He took a deep breath and grabbed the police light he’d nicked from Kevin Keller down at the sheriff’s office. Opening his window, Jughead stuck it to the roof of his car, igniting the surrounding trees in shimmering flashes of red, white and blue. He found the irony of the entire situation hilarious and threw his head back laughing. There was no turning back now.

Archie pulled off to the side of the road and Jughead followed, leaving a few feet between their bumpers. He flipped the switch on the light of justice and stepped out of the car.

Jughead grabbed a pair of black leather gloves from the back pocket of his jeans and slid them on over his fingers, surprised to find the shaking had stopped. He walked over to Archie’s driver side window with a smile on his face as he reached for the handle. “What the fuck?” Archie said, Jughead surprised to find the door unlocked. “You’re not the cops.”

A deep chuckle escaped from the back of Jughead’s throat. “Obviously. But you were speeding.” Jughead sniffed the air. “And drinking and driving too. Not so smart Old Sport.”

Annoyance gleamed over the curves of Archie’s face. “Can I go now?” he asked. He tried to close the car door but Jughead forced it open wider.

“Not so fast. Who was the girl?”

Archie’s eyebrows shot up and he choked on his next words. “J-Just a friend from work. We met up for a couple of drinks. What’s with the third degree?”

“No degree. Just natural curiosity, its human nature to be curious Arch,” Jughead paused and inhaled deeply. “So tell me, does your fiancé know about your friend in the little black dress?” Jughead swore he could see Archie pale before his eyes. He was already of a ghostly complexion, but now he was almost transparent.

Archie gripped the door handle tighter, trying harder to force it closed but Jughead refused to budge. “No. And from one friend to another, I’d really like to keep it that way Jug. Please. I promise that woman means nothing to me. Don’t tell Betty.”

He didn’t know what came over him but at the sound of Betty’s name Jughead absolutely lost it. He lunged for Archie, desperate to twist his fingers around his neck. If he was going to kill Archie, he was going to make him suffer.

Jughead had his knee bent into Archie’s groin. His hands were clamped around his throat and he could see the light draining from Archie’s eyes. He was doing it. He was going to kill him. “Any last words, Archiekins?”

Archie opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out. He was flailing under Jughead’s hold, trying to force and shove him away but the alcohol in his veins slowed down his reaction time. Finally he got in a punch to Jughead’s jaw, creating stars behind his eyes. It took every ounce of strength in him but Jughead refused to let go, tightening the grip around Archie’s neck. His arms began to shake as he forced all his weight upon his old friend. He thought Archie would’ve put up a better fight than this. It was pitiful on the brink of pathetic.

“Do you want to die? Fight me Archie! Punch me! Hit me!” Archie writhed underneath him, trying to squirm out of Jughead’s grasp but to no avail. It wasn’t supposed to be this easy. Tears spilled from the corners of Archie’s eyes and rolled slowly down his hollowed cheeks. He threw a punch into Jughead’s stomach and the brunette sputtered, loosening his grip only slightly. “That the best you got?” He spit in Archie’s face. Jughead was going to be sick. In a million years he never would’ve guessed this side of him existed. Sure he’d been a rather angry kid growing up, but he never imagined he’d be capable of murder. His stomach coiled, rolling over itself but Jughead forced the feeling away. He was going to finish this.

A few more seconds dragged on and Archie’s attempts to break free slowed. The strength in his body was depleting. His eyes rolled back into his head, his limp body falling back against the leather interior.

Jughead removed his hands from around his neck. Archie’s throat was bruised and beaten but Jughead didn’t care. He needed to get the fuck out of there. Carefully, he set Archie’s leg back into the car and Jughead closed the door, running back to his car. Thank God they lived in a small town, not a single car had driven by to witness the horrifying scene.

Once back inside his Caddy, Jughead tossed the gloves into this back seat. His palms were clammy and his forehead was dripping with sweat. He reached for the beanie on top of his head and threw it up on the dash. Starting his car he drove away, his hands slipping over the wheel as he did.

About a mile or so down the road Jughead stopped and pulled over. He couldn’t hold it in any longer. Running into the trees he emptied the contents of his stomach into the grass, gripping the nearest tree trunk for support. His legs were quivering and his heart felt like a ticking time bomb, reminding him of an old poem by Edgar Allen Poe. The events of the evening would surely haunt him for the rest of his life.

His throat burned and ached and he ran the back of his hand across his mouth to remove any excess throw up from his lips. He stood up tall, desperately straining to slow down the beating of his heart.

With shaky hands he reached into the front pocket of his jeans and flipped open his phone. He pressed number one for speed dial and waited as the shrilling ring echoed in his ear. His breath hitched when the phone on the other line picked up. Everything was silent.

Jughead breathed into the receiver. “It’s done,” he whispered, and the line clicked dead.

[elosnotebook]

PENETRATORS SQUAD IMAGINE (pt 6)

Imagine being the first and only girl in the Penetrator Russ bus. Author’s note: HEY IT’S HERE, DON’T NEED TO HATE ME ANYMORE. Once more time I need to tell you guys how grateful I’m for having Alyssa as my beta writer! Please, please, go to her page @imyourliquor-youremypoison and tell her how much you’re thankful for making me suck less. And about the fic, it’s coming to an end guys :) THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR SUPPORT FROM ALL OVER THE WORLD. You guys are the best! ♥ my ask is always open to hear about what you guys think.

Part 1. Part 5.

Part 7.

Masterlist ❁

-

Forty minutes, I told William. This was actually how long it took for me to get ready. What I didn’t count in was the extra hour I needed to convince myself to go to this stupid party.  I basically tried on all the clothes in my wardrobe. I wanted to make a big entrance but not one of my outfits satisfied me and my new found resoluteness to be under the spotlights that night. I needed to innovate, so I did. 

When I knocked on the door, my hands trembled. I couldn’t help but wonder if Chris himself would open it. I had no idea what to tell him or even if he was going to let me in. Luckily, Julian was the one who opened it for me, immediately wolf-whistling at me. 

“I can’t believe what my eyes are seeing.” He articulated every word slowly. “You're wearing your Penetrator hoodie at a party. This is not happening.” 

That was exactly the reaction I was looking for. 

“I wasn’t inspired to get dressed up up tonight,” I lied. Well, it wasn't a complete lie, but it wasn't the reason why I dug that hoodie out of the depths of my wardrobe either.

“Right.” He raised an eyebrow. “Is that the reason why your hair looks so soft, your makeup flawless, your jeans are the skinniest I’ve seen wear and you’re weaing fucking heels?” His eyes were traveling up and down my body to take in every detail. “All of this because you didn’t wanna get dress up? Gotcha.” He winked at me. 

“Are you gonna let me in and give me a beer or do I have to do everything by myself around here?” I pushed him away, so he wouldn’t notice I was blushing. 

“Do I look like a waiter to you? Go get something yourself. That’s what those beautiful legs of yours are for,” he replied with a shit eating grin on his face. 

I opened my mouth to say something and pretend I was offended. “Julian! Is that how you treat girls? No wonder you’re alone.” 

“No, Cap.” He gave me the beer he was holding. “That’s how I treat my dumb brothers and my pain in the ass sister.” 

I smiled at him. 

“Fuck,” he blurted out.

“What’s wrong?” I said, looking for a mirror so I could see where I did go wrong.

“I’ve seen you at a million parties before, but this one, Cap? You’re unbelievably stunning. This hoodie was made for you, no doubt.” 

I felt my face burn and turn red. 

“Thank you, July.” I leaned in to give him a kiss on the cheeks.

“You’re welcome, babe. And you know, if a guy messes with you…” 

“He’ll have to deal with you,” I said, remembering the first sentence he told me on our first party as Penetrators. 

The memory got me smiling even bigger. He kissed my forehead and went to answer the door one more time. It wasn’t crowded but there was still a lot of people there. More girls than boys. So typical. It would be to do difficult what I intended to do, but not impossible.

I looked around, trying to come up with a plan for the night. Since my best friend Christoffer Schistad was going around hooking up with girls and calling them sluts for it - like it was just their fault - I thought it would be a good thing to teach him what slut actually means. But first, I was going to need a drink. 

My legs went automatically to Chris’ kitchen, in the exact place where he usually hides the good stuff for his after party with whoever decided to stay. I opened the kitchen cabinet to find a

beautiful bottle of tequila. I could swear it had a halo all around it.

I grabbed the bottle and poured myself a first shot, feeling the liquid burn my throat. I poured another shot, when a familiar voice filled the room, covering the music.

“So many things to worry about, never thought you robbing my tequila would be one of them,” Chris said, taking the bottle from my hand and pouring himself a shot too. “But since you look fucking gorgeous wearing your hoodie, I’ll forgive you.”

“What? Do you prefer to waste a bottle of José Cuervo with girls you’ll bang once than with your best friend?” I took the bottle out of his hand to pour myself another drink. 

“I talked to them today more than I talked to you the whole week. Not that I didn’t try.”

“I was busy.”

Another shot.

“Yeah, I heard ignoring me takes a lot of time.” He frowned, while seeing me down it.

“What Chris? Are you going to act like you didn’t deserve it?” I had to grab the closest thing so the world would stop spinning. Sadly, it was Chris.

“Ok, that’s enough for you,” he said, placing the bottle out of my reach. “I thought you coming here was your way to say we were good.”

“Hey, can I have that back? I was enjoying it.” I tried to reach the bottle, without success.

“No, you've had enough shots,” he told me in a scolding tone.

“Oh, I’m sorry. Are you trying to save it for the hoes you want to hook up with later?” I gave him the most cynical smile I could.

“Don’t do that…” I could notice he was getting mad. Good. I was just starting. 

I got closer to whisper on his ear. “You were the one who started it, Christoffer.” I traced his jawline with my nail. “Keep that in mind.” And I left. 

The rest of the party consisted in me hooking up with every living soul there. I knew Chris was watching and getting angrier every time I kissed a different mouth, and for the record, it was a a lot. The Tequila was making my head spin, so I decided to sit on the couch before continue my crusade, closing my eyes for a moment so the world would stop moving. 

“I stopped counting on your seventh guy,” William said, sitting next to me. 

“Seven? That was only the first two hours.” I rested my head on his shoulder. 

“The guys and I understand that you’re trying to prove a point. We just don’t understand which one.”  I opened my eyes to look at him, but it only got me more confused since I didn’t know which William should I be talking to. 

“I’d explain if you and your identical twin stopped looking at me so judgmentally.” I closed my eyes again. 

“Identical twin?” He giggled. “How much did you drink?” 

“Four shots of tequila, and I basically stole drinks from every guy I hooked up with.” 

“You shouldn’t have done that! What if there was something in their drinks?” He was trying to control himself, but I knew he must have been so mad. 

“William.” I pulled back to look him in the eyes. “I got exactly fourteen boys watching over me and monitoring my every move, and the reason that it is not sixteen is because I don’t see Julian and Theo anywhere.”

“Theo is wasted.” I raised an eyebrow. “Much worse than you. Julian is taking care of him.” 

I shut my mouth, feeling the urge to look for Julian and Theo. William noticed the change. 

“No, no. I can’t believe I’m saying this but today you’re getting drunk” He squeezed his eyes shut. “Well, more drunk. Let me and the boys take care of you for a change.” 

“Y'all are so discreet. I can say safely the boys are frightening every guy that comes near me just with their eyes.“ I rolled my eyes, pretending to be mad, but honestly, I would be forever grateful for them.

William looked around, but his eyes stopped on the door. He chuckled while shaking his head. “Tonight will give me such a headache, I can feel it.” 

I followed his eyes to understand what he was talking about. Jonas and his three friends en-tered the room. I let a curse escape from my mouth as I turned to face William. 

“I won’t hook up with Jonas. If that’s what you’re thinking.” 

He frowned. “Why not?” 

“I’m at Chris’. He would skin me alive if I touched Jonas here,” I admitted.

William laughed. “She has boundaries, who knew? I can not believe it. You stuck your tongue into every guy’s mouth today so you can piss him off but when you have the perfect weapon, you won’t use it.” I could hear the amusement on his voice, which was really annoying. 

“Actually, I stuck my tongue into some girls’ mouth too.” I bit my lips. “And I am not afraid, I just don’t want to turn it into a fucking war.” 

“Ok, say whatever you want. But just you know, Jonas is coming here. If you wanna run, you have to do it now.” 

I stood up quickly, which wasn’t a good idea due to everything I drank that night, but I still managed to walk toward the stairs. Once I was – miraculously – made it upstairs without falling, I grabbed the closest doorknob so I could regain balance. I totally forgot to say goodbye to William, but he would understand. I rested my body against the wall of the hallway, using that moment to breathe, when the bathroom’s door opened, making me jump. Julian walked out, carrying a drunk Theo.  “CAP HERE YOU ARE!” He shouted, getting rid of Julian’s arms to hug me tightly. 

Julian gave me an apologetic glance, and I realized he must have lost most of the party taking care of Theo. 

“July, why don’t you go get something to drink while I take your place here?” I asked him. 

“William said we couldn-” 

“I am saying it’s okay. Go have fun.” I dismissed him with my hand. 

Theo was still hugging me, but his legs weren’t doing a good job, since he was almost smash-ing me with his weight. 

“Theo, we both are going to fall hard if you don’t stand up straight.” 

He pulled himself away but his hands were still holding my shoulders. 

“Too late for that.” 

I didn’t know if his comment was too random or I didn’t get what he was saying because of the drinks I had. Either way, it didn’t make sense to me. 

“I heard about a new girl. Where is she?” I asked, trying to build a conversation. Looking around to see if he had an escort I haven’t seen until that moment. The only thing I saw was Chris standing at the top of the stairs. 

“Right here,” Theo slurred before he kissed me.

Yes. You heard right. Theo fucking kissed me. While Chris was looking. Things couldn’t get any worse, right? 

Wrong.  I pushed Theo away, my eyes looking for Chris instantly and - of course - not finding him. I had to fight the impulse to run after him so I could at least try to make him understand what the hell did just happened. Theo hugged me again, and I gently unwrapped his arms. He didn’t resist. 

“Theo?” My head was spinning and for the first time of the night, it wasn’t because of how much I’ve drunk. “What the hell?”

“Come on Cap, like you haven’t noticed it,” he said jokingly. 

No, I haven’t! I wanted to scream. But I kept my voice down. I didn’t want to start a fight with another Penetrator. Soon enough, I’ll be excluded from the group if I keep arguing with them. Plus, he was incredibly drunk. Who knows if what he was telling me was actually true? “Notice what, Theo?” 

He didn’t answer. I just hated when they did that.

“We can’t do it Theo!” I threw my hands in the air. 

“I know, it’s against the rules…” He rubbed the back of his neck. 

Unbelievable. I’m pretty sure I woke up in a whole different world this morning, yesterday wasn't nearly as fucked up as today.

“It’s not about the rules, Theo.” 

“Wait. So, you don’t feel the same?” He asked, confused. 

“Feel what?” I laughed nervously. Of course I knew about what he was talking about, but I needed a little time to actually find what to do. 

“But you stayed with me for two weeks. I thought…” His voice faded slowly. 

The truth was that my heart was broken. Into millions of pieces. I have dealt with so many boys having crushes on me after two or three hook ups and I never actually cared about hurting them. I knew they would recover at some point. But staring at Theo’s eyes, I was destroyed just at the thought of doing the same to him.

“I did it to help you feel better.” I could barely hear myself. “I’d have done it for every one of the boys.” If my words were hurting me, I couldn’t imagine what it was doing to him. 

His face turned from embarrassed boy to the fuckboy face I’m used to. “If you excuse me, I have to go…” His face suddenly turned green and he covered his mouth with both hands. “To the bathroom,” he said, while slamming the door to my face.

Once I pulled myself together - at least as much I could - I went downstairs. Theo was still in the bathroom. I started to wonder how drunk he was and if he was going to remember something tomorrow. Something was telling me he was going to. William was talking to Julian when I reached them. Probably telling him he shouldn’t have let me take care of Theo. 

“Chris?” It was all I could ask. 

“In his garage. He has company?” Julian said, analyzing my attitude. He wouldn’t take long to notice something was wrong. William would take even less. “Where is Theo?” He completed. 

“Probably throwing up in the bathroom. Can you both check on him for me? Thanks.” I didn’t give them the chance to answer, and went straight for the garage. 

My heart was racing when I opened the door and turned the lights on. Chris was in the corner

of the room, hooking up with some random girl. His clothes were still on, I realized, relieved. Sadly, her top was lost. But better to see a shirtless girl than them actually having sex. I was traumatized enough for the day. 

“What the hell?” The girl turned to me, so I could give her a better look. It happened it wasn’t a random girl. It was his ex girlfriend, Iben. 

I don’t think I have to say how much all Chris’ ex girlfriends hate me, right? Actually, not only his girls. Every girlfriend from one of the Penetrators would probably send me to live in a desert if they had the chance. 

“Hi Iben. Looking good, I see.” I forced myself to say. 

“Leave and turn off the lights,” Chris demanded. He didn’t even look at me. 

“Hmm, actually, I’m not leaving without talking to you.” 

Iben grabbed her shirt and put it on. Chris was making complain noises. “I see some things never change.” 

“You don’t need to go, Iben. She was just leaving.” 

I swallowed hard. “No. I’m not?” It sounded like a question. 

“Are you asking me?” She was incredibly angry. “It doesn’t matter. She was your priority before, and she still is,” she said, while bumping me. If it wasn’t for his car, I’d probably had fallen.

When she left, the room felt even smaller. I looked around to see if something was sucking the air out of there, because I felt like I couldn’t breathe. I hooked up with every single person I could put my eyes on tonight, so how could I explain to him Theo wasn’t supposed to be one of them? I don’t think I would believe it if someone told me this story. I gathered all my strength to look at him. 

“What you saw wasn’t-” 

“Actually, it was very clarifying,” he interrupted, standing up straight. 

“What do you mean?” The comment caught me completely off guard.

“Now I know why you got so mad with the situation. You have feelings for Theo. It’s so obvious, I don’t know how I didn’t see it before.” He was telling me this like he was speaking about the weather. This voice didn’t hold any emotion, and I thought it terrifying. 

“I wish I had a mirror here so you could see how ridiculous you look saying it.” I rested my body on his car. “I am not in love with Theo. Come on, you know me better than this.”

"Right." 

"Chris, I am not.” I tried to grab his hands, but he pulled them. Good. He was mad. Much better than the cold exterior he was showing me. “I am really not. Theo thought I was and he got everything wrong.” Tears started to go down my face before I could notice it. “I had to break his heart, Chris. It was terrible." 

I could see in his face that he believed what I was telling him, which was a relief. But he was too proud to actually admit it. 

"You were mad at me when I broke his heart. Should I do the same thing right now?" 

He didn’t give me a chance to react it. The distance between us was gone with one large step. 

"It’s different and you know it, Christoffer.” I was whispering now, he was so close I could feel his breath on my skin.

“Oh yeah? Let’s ask Theo which one hurt more.”

I didn’t know what to say, and luckily for me I didn't have to think about it too long, because

William showed up in the door. 

“Is everything okay around here?” 

“Not even close,” Chris said and walked away from both of us. 

We both watched him leave through the door. I was still staring at it when William turned to me in expectation. He was wondering if he should ask what happened. He took a sip on his beer at the same time I dropped a bomb on his lap. 

“I'm in love with Christoffer.”

William swallowed wrong and ended up choking on his beer. His cough filled the room. His eyes went wide open, showing how shocked he really was.

“I know,” I said, leaving him before the questions could start. “I know.”

I spent the rest of the party running away from William. He basically followed me everywhere, asking about why, what, how, and the particular one I didn’t wanna answer: since when. I didn’t know how to tell my ex boyfriend that I broke up with him because I had feelings for our mutual best friend. It sounded so fucking cliché, and it would most likely hurt him. I couldn't hurt any more of my boys tonight.

“You’re messing with me,” he finally said, when I didn’t answer any of the thousands of questions he threw my way. It was probably the logical conclusion he came to after spending the whole night trying to get answers out of me and receiving none.

“I wish I was, Will. Believe me.” 

After that, he let it go. I could guess how confusing it must have been in his head but I didn’t feel like talking to him about it. I didn’t even know why on earth I spilled it out to him. I always knew that my drinking would bring me problems, but I didn’t know how big they would be.

I tried to avoid every single soul there, which was hard. The boys I didn’t hook up with were almost offended when I turned them down. Also, I had to dismiss Jonas, probably ruining the last chance I had with him. But I couldn’t think about anything else in that moment.

Also, I haven’t seen Theo or Chris for the rest of the party. I knew Chris probably convinced Iben to go back to any empty room, and Theo? I had no idea, and I didn’t know if not seeing him was actually a good or a bad thing.

Everyone was gone now. I knew the smartest choice would be to go home and wait until the next day to talk to Chris. But making smart decisions wasn’t one of my top qualities these days, and at this point in the day, I thought it couldn't possibly get worse anyway. I opened his bedroom’s door so I could watch him. He was laying in the bed, his breath slow by steady. From where I was standing, I couldn’t see his face, so I had no idea if he was sleeping. 

Without giving it a second thought, I stepped in the room, reaching his bed and crawling to the pillow next to him. I threw my heels to the corner and I touched his legs with my naked feet. 

Every time we slept with each other, we used to rest our foot on the other’s legs, as a way of saying ‘I’m here’. We do it since the first sleepover we had at William’s when we were thirteen and I was scared of the dark. This was the way Christoffer found to calm me down, and it worked.

“I can’t argue with you right now,” he stated. 

I was staring at the back of his head. His hair was a mess and I had to close my hands so I wouldn’t touch it. 

“Good. I don’t think I can do it either.” 

He turned around so he could face me. His bed was huge, but with everything that happened, the gap between us seemed even bigger than usual.

“What are we doing?” He whispered. 

“I don’t know,” I answered, honestly. “Do you want me to go?” 

He took a deep breath and turned to stare the ceiling. 

“I feel like there’s a right answer to this question. But I don’t feel like saying it.”

I let the breath I didn’t realize I was holding go. 

“So don’t.” I copied his position. 

“You’re not sleeping wearing this. You know how much people sleeping in jeans bothers me,” he told me. “Plus, it’s the first party you used your hoodie, you won’t sleep in it.” 

“Schistad, shouldn’t you buy me dinner before you try to get me out of my clothes?” I joked, getting up and sliding my jeans down my legs. 

“Of course. Because you’re that type of girl.”

I took my hoodie off and hung it over his desk chair. I went to his closet to find something to wear.

“You were right, by the way.”

I turned around to look at him. He was staring at me.

“I’m right about m-”

“Don’t cliché me,” he said, the corner of his mouth moving a little bit. “When you said the view was great. It is.”

I turned to the closet again, so I could blush and smile without him actually seeing it. I had already found what I was going to wear but I pretended a few minutes more so he could enjoy the view a little bit. After all, looks never killed anyone, right? When I decided it was enough, I grabbed his Captain America shirt and put it on. I’ve worn this so many times, my smell was impregnated to the shirt. 

“Satisfied?” I asked him. He just nodded. “Who do you think is a hotter Cap? Me or Chris Evans?” 

“Is that even a real question?” He yawned. “Chris Evans. Without a doubt.” 

I crawled back to his bed, elbowing him for the comment. 

“Come on! I’d be gay if he asked me to,” he completed. 

I rolled my eyes and turned my back to him. After the day I had, that moment made my hear lighter. It was a relief. 

“Are we good?”

He was making circles on the back of my neck. In another situation, it would give me goosebumps and I would go crazy. But it was nothing sexual there. He was just trying to catch my attention. And honestly? After his last attempts, with the fake drunk and the waiting for me outside my house situations, this was a good change. 

I pondered about the question for a moment. “If I said no, will you kick me out of your house?”

“Do you want me to kick you out?” He asked me.

“No,” I answered truthfully. 

“So I won’t.”

“So no, we’re not good,” I sighed. “I’m sorry Chris, but I can’t just forgive and forget.”

“I made some mistakes. You did too,” he whispered. “Can’t we call it a tie?”

“So, every time I screw up, you’ll go and do something bad? One bad thing for another?” I closed my eyes. “I don’t think it’s healthy.”

“You say it like we do it all the time. This is literally the first time we didn’t talk for this long.”

“Plus, my mistake, singular, wasn’t my fault. How I was supposed to know Theo was going to kiss me?” 

He yawned one more time, and I joined him on this one.

“Can we just continue this conversation tomorrow?” He asked me.

I didn’t want to. But I could see at his face how tired he was, and I was pretty sure my face wasn’t looking any different.

“Sure,” I told him. “Our problems will still be here by the morning.” I turned my back on him.

“That’s what I’m afraid of,” he mumbled.

I closed my eyes, just trying to enjoy the moment for as long as I could. It didn’t take much until the exhaustion took over. The last thing I remember was a cold feet touching my leg, before I gave in and slept.

[iwanttowriteyou]

All I Wanted; C.H. 19

part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7, part 8, part 9, part 10**, part 11*, part 12*, part 13, part 14, part 15**, part 16, part 17, part 18

It didn’t take much convincing from my part when Michael squealed that he’d love to go out again – and before Meredith could protest in any way possible, Mikey was already hitting Luke and Ashton up. It left me with a giant grin on my face and I wish that I could thank Michael for his quick agreement. I was quite nervous for some apparent reason, but did my absolute best of not letting it get to me.

My smile already vanished off of my face when we walked into the infamous bar. Calum’s tall frame was practically leaning over the counter while he shot this brunette his million-dollar smile. Apparently frown was picked up by Luke, because I feel his arm snake around my shoulders before he gives me a squeeze. “How do you expect him to get tips otherwise?”

I was glad he said it. Of course, Calum was a waiter and I’ve seen the other males that work here flirt their ass off for their drinking money before – how gigglier the girl, how bigger the tip. “I guess you’re right…” I smile crookedly, leaning a bit against him as he steers us towards the bar. I take a seat beside Luke, focusing on the glasses in front of me instead of Calum to my left.

“Hi guys, glad you could make it.” He smiles in our general direction, popping in front of us out of nowhere. Everyone orders their standard drink and I think I received a wink when I muttered my beer, but I could be wrong on that as well. I see another girl emerge from the corner of my eye, I think it’s another one – otherwise her drink would be emptied a bit too quickly.

“Calum – baby. Hit me up will you?” She giggles and Calum turns his head from his talk with Luke – which I didn’t even see happen in the first place – before he happily skips over to her and fills her glass up again. “Here you go.” A wink in thrown her way and I can feel my jaw tense significantly. I’m pulled from my trance when I feel Luke’s elbow jab in my side and I wince out loud.

“Why would you do that?” I groan, rubbing my sore spot as I throw a glare at the lanky blonde. “Well I actually think you’d otherwise shoot lasers from your eyes. Jealousy isn’t attractive, Y/n. It’ll be fine.” Luke winks as he brings his glass to his lips, taking a sip as he averts his gaze. “If you say so. I have a strange feeling about tonight – but I can’t pinpoint it.”

“You’re just a bit pessimistic, come on. You’re with friends, you’re healthy and you get a shag when you dig one. I’m pretty certain you’re living a good life.” Luke laughs and I can’t help but start chuckling with him as well, my hand squeezing his shoulder. “Damn, I don’t have any argument against that.”

“That was my point all along –“  Luke starts but my voice – rather a groan – interrupts him. “Seriously? Another one?” I point as subtly as I can to my left, seeing another girl twirling her hair around her finger and batting her eyelashes at Calum. Okay, we weren’t official – we weren’t anything I think – but that didn’t mean he couldn’t at least try and be subtler about flirting right in front of me.

“Y/n, what did I just tell you? Let it go, let it slide off of your shoulders. Oh, and ad fundum that shit. If that doesn’t work nothing will.” Luke points to my glass when I raise an eyebrow in pure confusion before he explains himself. “Chug that back like no tomorrow, I’m sure that’ll help too.” “Ooh,” I laugh before raising my glass, “That I can do.”

*****************

Girl after girl swooped by, but I saw this particular brunette pop up a bit too often for my liking. I had no business in being a jealous girlfriend, Calum spoke to me, like he usually does, and I had no reason to complain. He did seem more distant though, but the last few times I hadn’t seen him with Meredith so close by. Even though he could easily sneak in anything that would make me feel a bit better – Meredith was on the other side of the bar by Michael’s side, after all.

It’s when I see Luke grant me with his sympathetic and almost apologetic look I know I shouldn't. But I do it anyway. I turn my ass on the bar stool, Calum and the girl now into my view. "Here you go, love." I can hear the smile in Calum's voice without even glancing at him.

"Another beer, Cal. And your number." I can feel my jaw tense at the flirty tone of the girl. Calum laughs and moves away - for her drink, probably. It's when I hear the click of a pen my heart seems to stop and I snap my head in their direction.

I watch him hand over the paper, I watch him smile at her. I watch her giggle and wink before turning around and granting Calum with a lovely view of her ass. I watch my heart break into a million pieces. I feel my throat slip closed.

He senses it. His smile disappears from his lips as he slowly turns to catch my gaze. I can't stay here. I might be a split second away from a mental breakdown.

My chair screeches obnoxiously loud against the tiles. I've pushed myself away from the bar so quickly I almost lose my balance as I tumble off of the seat, shaking my head to get my thoughts in order. "Y/n,..." Luke starts, his fingers brushing against my shoulder but I shrug him off. "I want - i need to go." I whisper, fast pacing out of the bar. I'm smart enough to shrug my coat off of the hanger before I violently throw open the door and sprint outside.

I feel my body heave as my eyes dart around the dark of the night. I'm shaking against the wall - every muscle is strained, adrenaline shooting through me as I try to think of a way to get out of here.

"Y/n! Y/n?" Calum practically storms outside and freezes in his spot as he notices me leaning against the mould filled wall of his bar.

"Sorry." He quickly speaks, eyes wide as I lift my head to catch his gaze. "For what, exactly?"

"I maybe shouldn't have - well yeah - given my number." He mumbles almost incoherently, his hand rubbing along the back of his neck - indicating his nervous habit had returned.

"You maybe? Maybe shouldn't have?" I almost seethe, balling my small, already frozen hands into fists near my side. I harshly sink my teeth in my bottom lip, glare kept focused on Calum's nose. "Well yeah. I probably shouldn't have done that. I'm sorry." I feel my mouth drop open at his nonchalant matter of speech.

"How.. how dare you even? How dare you think you can just toy with my emotions like I am a rag doll?" I start off whimpering, my voice gaining power and anger as my words progress. Calum is quiet, probably a smart move to play on his behalf - but it fuels my anger even more.

"You - you're everything I have been warned about. I can't - I -" I feel my face heat up, teardrops starting to build in the corners of my eyes. I refuse to let him see even more how badly this has hurt me - I think my words do that trick for me already.

"Y/n, babe. I - I mean, we weren't and..." Calum starts stumbling over his words, the nervousness he possesses almost endearing. I can't find any words, so I settle with a shake of my head as I cross my arms over my chest defensively.

"We weren't what, exactly? I don't understand. Why did I deserve this?" I cast my gaze down, trying to slow my breathing so my heart rate would also calm, eventually. I see Calum's feet shift in the corner of my eye, his battered old vans scruffing against the wet pavement.

"Sweetheart, just let me -" as Calum raises his arm to reach out for me, I step back rapidly. "Let you what? Explain? Fuck you, Calum. You've known me for all these years - how could you treat a friend like this? How - how just - I mean, fuck I've defended you all those years. But she was right - she was fucking right all along." I shake my head ferociously as I pull my coat closer around my frame. I have the feeling I might start hyperventilating if I don't get out of here - fast.

"Please tell Meredith I went home." I mumble as I've already turned on my heel and began my freezing walk home. "Y/n I can't just let you leave - not like this." Calum yells after me, making me momentarily stop in my tracks. "You've given me a real eye opener. Leave me alone, Calum." I speak with glancing in his direction once, letting my boot hit the puddle of water on the pavement in front of me, creating a small splash.

My heart aches and I feel my chest tighten as I walk away and out of sight. I'm not sure if I did the right thing - and I don't think I'll ever be certain.

I don’t know how long I’ve been walking – five, maybe ten minutes at most. I didn’t intend on going home, in fear of any of my mates showing up and wanting a talk. I’ve been choosing my road completely random, a left now, a right there, a cross over when I reach that point – and it seems to be working because I’m not quite sure where I am.

I’m sniffing, I’m aware of that, seeing as how many people crossing my path either shoot me a look of sympathy or they glare at me as if I’ve murdered their dog. But no tear has yet fallen, and I’m thankful for my own stubbornness for as long as I’m out in public.

“Y/n? Y/n, is that you?” I hear his voice and I stop, turning my head to see his tall frame jog up to me. “Oh, Harry. Hey.” I mumble, slowly shuffling as I turn my whole body towards him as he stops right in front of me. “Are – are you alright?”

“I don’t know actually.” I shrug my shoulders, breathing heavily through my nose, tip of my toe poking at a pebble near my feet. “Is it Calum?” “Hmm…” I hum, which is answer enough for Harry to know something has happened – something everyone saw coming, even I.

“Come on, let’s go for a walk.” Harry sighs as he pushes me back around, steering me in the direction I was going as he falls into step beside me.

Let me know what you think babes! xox

[nicoolios]

Days Past

Here’s my gift to @laceandlyrium for the @holidayharbinger gift exchange. Hope you like it!

“How you proceed is up to you, Rosie. I say romance. Candles. Bubble baths. Dinner. Unless more intimate. Then alone time. Should inspect you first. Want to make sure you’re fine. Unless you prefer Chakwas-”

“Mordin, please. Not necessary. I don’t even know what we’re doing yet.” Her mind supplied the word date, causing a deep blush. It was her first time planning a private outing with Kaidan since the destruction of the Normandy SR-1 and she was nervous as all get out. They had done things together before since Huerta, but they had all been group activities. Alone was terrifying. “And if I remember correctly, all I asked for was life advice. Not detailed analysis of my sex life.”

“Ah, yes. Apologies. Carry on, then.”

Sighing heavily, Rosie left the med bay. Served her right for asking the overeager salarian about interpersonal relationships. Nothing was ever straightforward anymore. Not in her professional life, her social life, and now apparently her love life. Her trip to Mordin hadn’t been entirely useless, though. An idea began to take shape in her mind. She toyed with it as she prepared a cup of tea. As it brewed she became lost in thought, wondering how on Earth she was to reconcile her relationship with Kaidan. Instinctually Rosie felt the need to be in charge of the whole affair. It was in her nature to look out for others and solve their problems however she could. Ever since she could remember she always classified herself as the “mom friend.” As she grew older and joined the Alliance, therefore being introduced to the exotic new species the galaxy had to offer, only cemented the personality trait. Other races didn’t view it as strange, leading to some very awkward late night chats about boundaries.

But all her friends got wise of the situation and insisted she should step back. Let somebody else do the work for once. Let the man prove his respect, her worth to him. Eventually they wore her down. Relinquishing control wasn’t easy for someone born to be in command. Consequently she had nothing to do today. The Normandy was docked at the Citadel and most its occupants enjoying the change of scenery. Even Joker convinced EDI to attend a movie with him. All that was well and good. Rosie had no desire to leave before noon. The Normandy was home more than the Citadel would ever be. Her training prevented appreciation of sudden drastic change. A few days before Anderson gave her permission to use his local apartment, but doing so felt wrong. Like he was giving away his possessions in preparation for death. So long as he was alive Rosie refused to treat it as her own.

There was always Silverson Strip. Arcades and fighting arenas were nice when joined by friends. Otherwise alone it felt like work. The Citadel remained relatively untouched by the war. Why taint it with a war relic? Besides, Rosie liked the quiet. It wasn’t often total silence enveloped the mess hall. Even the warp core took a rest. Steam twirled up in gentle plumes from the mug. The tan liquid wobbled slightly in her shaking hands. Cerberus repaired old tendon damage brought upon by years of abuse, but machinery wore down. Computers failed. Sophisticated wiring didn’t hold up to days of use and no proper care or rest. Hands able to steady a gun couldn’t hold a mug properly. Quite sad.

A hand slapped her shoulder out of nowhere, resulting in spilled tea soaking her shirt. Rosie yelped in surprise and pain. The scalding liquid forced her frantic spin to the sink next to her. Hurriedly she blotted her chest. As the tea was absorbed by the towel she glanced up to see Tali standing eagerly before her. The young quarrian seemed way too excited about something. She bounced on her toes, her fingers deciding whether to intertwine or reach out to Rosie. She apparently decided a mix of the two was best. Rosie set the towel aside to give her friend her whole attention. “What’s got you all worked up?”

If Tali hadn’t been wearing a face mask her expression would’ve made it obvious. As it was, she still took Rosie’s hand excitedly. “I was wondering if you would allow me to assist you in your daytime preparations? Like you used to help me before we went to the Citadel?”

“You mean when you asked if we could play dress up because you were bored?” Her dipped head confirmed her answer. This is what she got for making friends with young, impressionable girls. Still, perhaps some good would come out of it. “Fine. Yes. But only because I have no idea what to do.”

“Oh, this will be such fun!” she squealed. “Come on while the day is still young.” She grabbed Rosie’s hand to lead her to her cabin.

What followed was a very long, very complex, very…interesting game of “Making Rosie Look Presentable.” Her hair was pulled in a million different directions. Numerous shades of makeup painted her face, combinations never thought possible attempted. Dress after dress was shoved over her head only to be tossed aside. As the couch slowly became swamped, so did the coffee table under piles of everything else: shoes, jewelry, and the like. The entire contents of her closet were turned inside out until Tali found the perfect match. Rosie’s hair was swept up in a messy braided crown. Her eyelids were dusted with green, her lips silver, and her nails a lighter mix of the two. Her dress draped low over her back, scooping her chest in a wave of sparkles. The whole thing was a deep grassy green, knee-length and skintight. On her neck was a simple charm, a Christmas gift from Ashley years ago. Last but not least, strappy silver heels clung to her feet.

All in all Rosie felt overly dolled up, like she was attending a wedding instead of wandering the Citadel. Was all this really necessary? Just to impress rich civilians who didn’t give a damn about what she was trying to do? Tali admired her handiwork for a split second. It was rather impressive, its unpracticality notwithstanding, given its source. Standing before the bathroom mirror, Rosie had to admit she looked good. She thanked Tali while leading her to the elevator. Now she had to go out. They made it as far as the galaxy map before the pinging of the personal computer drew her attention. Only a skeleton crew remained on the ship; those out and about more than likely had their omni tools on them. There was no need for the computer to be receiving messages. “Go on ahead,” she told her friend, urging her towards the airlock. Eyeing the flashing image, Rosie clicked the box.

Hey Rosie,

Sorry I had to tell you this through text. You were so busy I didn’t want to bother you with something unimportant. Meet me at Apollo’s at noon for lunch? Figured you could use a distraction and besides, they still have steak on the menu.

Meet you there. Kaidan

It wasn’t automatically stamped with his rank and job title, meaning he took the time to type it out personally. He knew she had nothing to do today, knew they needed some personal time to sort out whatever their relationship was. The man knew more than she ever would. How could she say no to the flood of memories returning at the sight of his name? From their post-mission chats on the SR-1 to the endless lonely nights hunting Collectors to the hell that was their trip to Mars. The clock on the edge of the screen read 11:30. Either she must leave now or feign ignorance.

Rosie bolted to the door. Running was so much harder in heels. Curse Tali for bypassing the comfortable boots. Wait a minute. Tali’s dress up request seemed awfully convenient after reading the message. It was almost like she knew Kaidan planned an outing. Highly suspicious. Regardless she rushed to the nearest cab station and summoned a ride. The trip was relatively short, thank the stars, and the driver accepted her credit chit with ease. Now running looked out of place. Toning it down to a brisk walk, Rosie passed oblivious citizens and hyper security alike. Then, standing at the base of the stairs leading to the restaurant, she saw him. Too late to back out now.

He sat at a table overlooking the lake, staring at the intricacy of the artificial sun illuminating the calm water. A menu and glass of beer already sat before him. He didn’t notice her at first, but when he did, he smiled warmly. He knew something she didn’t. He managed to surprise Commander Shepard.

Kaidan rushed to pull a seat for her. Rosie sat awkwardly, feeling too dressed up and noting each set of eyes lingering on them. Not every day two war heroes enjoyed a casual lunch date in public. “Why’d you ask over e-mail? And why did Tali know before me?”

Rubbing the back of his neck, Kaidan replied, “You were so busy with psych evals I wanted to give you some time. And I know you two spent a lot of time together on the first Normandy. It always ended with you in a good mood. I miss this side of you.”

She blushed. She knew Kaidan loved their time together before she was spaced, knew she loved her breaks from the job with Ashley, Tali, and Liara. “This side of me isn’t out there saving lives. The entire galaxy depends on me. Every minute I’m not out there fighting more innocent people die.”

“I don’t intend to keep you from that, Rosie. But we need to talk.”

“What’s there to talk about?” Horizon. Suicide mission. Staying faithful. Revival. House arrest with no visits. Mars. Cerberus. Saying I’m a husk. “You made your side pretty clear when you called me a terrorist and equated me to a damn abomination.”

The waiter saved an immediate response by collecting drink orders. The alcohol would be welcome. Kaidan pretended to peruse the menu while he thought of how to word his answer. “Rosie, you know I’m more than sorry about that. I should’ve known you’d never return to Cerberus.”

It was an apology she’d heard a thousand times before. But this time, with the setting and atmosphere and him actively trying to start anew, it felt more…believable. Like it was said enough ties to breech her hardened exterior. “What if I accept your apology? We can’t pretend none of this ever happened. You still said some nasty things, I still ignored you…”

Their drinks were set before them and food ordered. Kaidan’s promise of steak held true. A long discussion ensued, starting at square one and only moving forward. Their sandwiches disappeared followed by their drinks. Despite Rosie’s observation of death lurking everywhere, they even took a walk around the Presidium. By the end their heads were clear, their hearts full, and their sense of purpose renewed. Come late afternoon they found themselves enjoying the Silverson Strip. Laughing harder than she had in ages, Rosie admitted this was a great decision. She might even have a future with her old flame. Come nightfall, they even found themselves leaving the casino in favor of her cabin on the Normandy. The night was old, but they were young. And Rosie wouldn’t have it any other way.

[jobsearchtips02]

9 individuals on how Germany effectively dealt with the coronavirus pandemic

The majority stated they were positive in the federal government handling of the virus and stated they felt safeguarded by the country’s robust health care system.

Nevertheless, others said that some German states are not prioritizing more vital aspects of society while reopening, choosing to resume the Bundesliga, the German football league, over pre-schools.

See Service Expert’s homepage for more stories

It’s the second weekend of May and Berlin remains in full swing. Public parks are covered in picnic blankets and sunbathing locals, and the city’s much-loved beer gardens are buzzing with people as they collect to consume and mingle in the hot afternoon sun.

Sebastian Wenz, an accounting professional who resides in the capital, is likewise there, watching neighboring television screens in anticipation as his house soccer group, Hertha BSC, returns to action for the very first time considering that the coronavirus outbreak.

” You wouldn’t believe that simply seven weeks back, Germany was going through a lethal pandemic,” Wenz informed Service Insider.

Eight weeks from the height of its coronavirus break out, Europe’s most populated nation has actually emerged relatively unscathed compared to the rest of the world.

Germany’s effective response to the coronavirus is credited to key elements including an early lockdown, a comprehensive testing program, and a working healthcare system, Organisation Expert formerly reported.

To date, the country has seen more than 183,000 verified coronavirus cases, but just 8,594 deaths To put this into viewpoint, New york city City alone, which has a tenth of Germany’s population, has around double that death toll.

Visitors sit at tables of dining establishments on the Neumarkt in front of the Frauenkirche in Dresden on May 22,2020

Robert Michael/picture alliance through Getty Images.

Unlike other European countries, including Spain or the United Kingdom, Germany managed to preserve its low death rate while still keeping lockdown steps fairly relaxed.

Each of its 16 federal states executed their own sets of lockdown guidelines, which varied in seriousness.

Now, as the country resumes and life gradually goes back to regular, Germans reviewed how they think the nation carried out in the face of the pandemic.

” In March all of it occurred really rapidly, from one day to the next. But then it also ended truly quickly and now we’re just trying to get back to regular,” said Wenz.

The 35- year-old and his family are slipping back into their old regimens. His 11- year-old child is back in school, his other half is operating in the workplace 3 times a week, and he recently enjoyed a weekend excursion to a museum with his in-laws.

” I’m an extremely logical person, so I remained calm throughout, although I think that’s also because in basic, the federal government seemed to have things under control,” he added.

A worker wearing a face shield talks with a customer at his coffee shop in Berlin on May 15,2020

Kyodo News/Getty Images.

Wenz is not the only one who feels in this manner.

” Their overall method was to say: ‘These are the guidelines, please stick to them.

Reitz also believes the federal government avoided an even worse break out by going into lockdown fairly early, although notes that this wasn’t an opinion shared by everyone.

” We have local governments who were doing their own thing.

Georgiana Ci, 28, who is originally from Romania however lives in Berlin, stated: “I felt safe that I am in Germany.

” I thought she made sense.

German Chancellor Angela Merkel holds a press conference at the Chancellery on May 20, 2020 in Berlin.

Omer Messinger-Pool/Getty Images.

During the crisis, Merkel got global acknowledgment for being level-headed. As a former research scientist with a doctorate in quantum chemistry, the German chancellor was typically seen on television breaking down stats, describing why certain procedures were taken, and calling for nationwide unity.

One video which revealed Merkel describing the clinical basis behind her lockdown technique during a press conference on April 16, was shared countless times on social networks.

The chancellor has actually been rewarded with her greatest approval scores because July 2017, according to a survey mentioned in Deutsche Welle. Her celebration, the Christian Democratic Union Party (CDU), shared the success, with their approval ranking up 5%from last month.

Every individual Service Expert spoke to likewise stated they were extremely impressed by and grateful for Germany’s healthcare system For lots of, it is the crucial factor in blunting the impact of the coronavirus.

Dagmar, 61, a relaxation therapist from Hennef, a city just outside Bonn, said: “I was positively surprised by our health care system. It is strong and functions well. It’s something Germans can do effectively.”

” I do not think we must undervalue how abundant and resourceful Germany is,” Goldfarb stated.

The 25- year-old adds that her mother, who works in a lab in a hospital in neighboring Bamberg, hasn’t been extremely busy for weeks.

” The huge state medical facilities prepared themselves so much.

Individuals spend Dad’s Day on the Elbe beach in Övelgönne, Hamburg, on May 21,2020

Bodo Marks/dpa by means of Getty Images.

Germany’s spending on health care per capita is among the greatest on the planet and it has the 2nd most critical-care beds per capita in Europe, Company Insider reported.

From the very beginning, the country took the hazard of COVID-19 seriously. By the time it taped its first coronavirus case in February, laboratories throughout the nation had actually developed a stock of test kits, The New york city Times reported. In the very same week, a national crisis group was formed and ICU capability increased by 12,000 to 40,000 beds.

On April 26, the nation’s lead epidemiologist, Christian Drosten informed The Guardian: “We are seeing half-empty ICUs in Germany. This is since we started diagnostics early and on a broad scale, and we stopped the epidemic– that is, we brought the reproduction number below 1.”

Germany’s rigorous testing system garnered appreciation from all over the world. With a population of around 83 million, the country can perform approximately one million diagnostic COVID-19 tests a day.

” We trust our health care system. If I feel terrible and my physician tells me to remain at home, I’m going to stay home,” stated Goldfarb.

The medical student’s view shows a cultural norm that also played an important function in the nation’s success: Germans listen to the rules.

Augsburg’s assistant coach Tobias Zellner offers an interview after the German very first department Bundesliga football match on May 16, 2020 in Augsburg.

Tobias Hase/Pool/Getty Images.

Matthias Veith, 31, who works in insurance coverage in Düsseldorf, said: “Maybe this is a more cultural thing, however when there is a guideline, Germans follow it.

” During the lockdown, it worked.

Veith remembers how at the peak of the pandemic, the city was deserted despite reasonably relaxed lockdown limitations.

However as Germany has seen a decrease in cases, people are not scared to reenter society.

Bettina von Hengstenberg, 72, who lives in Hamburg, states that even senior people are beginning to socialize once again, although they stay cautious.

” I’m not terrified to leave the house any longer, however I believe that’s due to the fact that the numbers in Hamburg are so low.

” I asked my neighbor for four weeks to go to the supermarket for me. After 4 weeks, I put my mask on and said: ‘Right, I’m going to go now due to the fact that I can no longer be afraid,” von Hengstenberg included.

A waiter serves beer in the Park Cafe in Munich on May 18,2020

Andreas Gebert/Reuters.

The one thing that does stress Germans, nevertheless, is the economy.

But while most people Service Insider spoke to support the resuming of the nation, some were cautious it was premature and could set off a 2nd wave of infection.

Sebastian Mihãilã, 27, who lives in Berlin, said: “I absolutely disagree with opening bars and clubs. I do not mind at all if there are 5 individuals in the park who are being in a circle, 2-meters apart, and just talk.”

But I do mind when I see these type of gatherings in front of a bar where individuals likewise get intoxicated and within two hours are all over each other, dancing and hugging. It’s meaningless,” he included.

A demonstrator wearing a mask holds up signs during a protest versus the government’s limitations, in Berlin on May 23,2020

Christian Mang/Reuters.

Stephan Brunnhuber, 29, who operates in IT in Munich, recently returned to the city after waiting out the pandemic with his parents in the countryside. The southern state tape-recorded the first coronavirus case in the country and, unlike other places, had a much more stringent lockdown.

” I think it’s great that we’re reopening however in other cases, I think it’s still prematurely. For instance, in Bavaria, they resumed the beer garden prior to kindergarten. I think in some cases it makes good sense but in this case, it doesn’t. Their top priorities are wrong,” he said.

The resumption of the Bundesliga, Germany’s soccer league, on May 16, also stimulated a great deal of debate in the country.

” The other leagues and seasons have been canceled. Why them? It’s so dangerous,” Brunnhuber said.

While there was extensive acceptance of a lockdown, some Germans also felt that the country overreacted In the last couple of weeks, the country has seen a boost in anti-lockdown demonstrations, which have suddenly end up being the leading edge of an international anti-vaxxer motion.

” The demonstrations are embarrassing. I feel mad when I see them since the only thing we are expected to do is to watch out for each other. It makes me wonder where the typical individuals remain in the world,” stated Goldfarb, the medical trainee from Nürnberg.

Because the peak of the break out, the country has had a great deal of time to reflect. Although it has been praised for its effective coronavirus action, the experience has still left a considerable effect on people’s lives. They are increasingly conscious that things won’t go back to normal– a minimum of for a while.

Goldfarb reflected: “I think there’s a big opportunity in this entire scenario to evaluate our lives, so I do think things will change a bit, and I hope that we will not simply go back to typical since that would imply we found out nothing from this.”

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from Job Search Tips https://jobsearchtips.net/9-individuals-on-how-germany-effectively-dealt-with-the-coronavirus-pandemic/

[fashiontrendin-blog]

Thinking about going plastic-free? This eco warrior's daily diary is all the inspo you need

http://fashion-trendin.com/thinking-about-going-plastic-free-this-eco-warriors-daily-diary-is-all-the-inspo-you-need/

Thinking about going plastic-free? This eco warrior's daily diary is all the inspo you need

If you care about the planet but have no idea how to help, you’re not alone.

New research from SodaStream revealed that 95% of Brits now believe they can personally make a difference to the plight of the planet, compared to just 36% in March 2017. Despite this, 6.2 million still haven’t made any effort to reduce their single-use plastic intake.

Legal & General Investment Management’s ‘Own Your World’ campaign reveals an impressive nine out of ten (92%) of the 18 to 55 year-olds surveyed said that minimising their impact on the environment is important, with 27% of under 35s saying it is *very* important.

Over half have pledged to buy less plastic bottles than this time last year and one third carry a reusable water bottle daily – in a bid to reduce the 19.2 million disposable bottles dumped in landfill every day *gasps*. We’re not just bottling it, as 79% are cutting down on supermarket 5p bags and half are saying no to plastic straws.

This is why you need to get behind World Oceans Day – and what we discovered will shock you

So if you’re hoping to jump on the plastic-free bandwagon, we’ve enlisted eco campaigner and zero waste advocate, Kate Arnell, to share a day in her plastic-free life in the hope that it will inspire you to do the same.

Plastic Free Guide

9 am – I enjoy reading a chapter or two of a book with a cup of coffee in bed for an hour. I work from home so I’m lucky I can set my own schedule. I brush my teeth using my wooden toothbrush and use a sprinkle of bicarbonate of soda bought from bulk (loose!) instead of toothpaste.

9:15 am – Breakfast time! I either have a bowl of organic oats with full fat organic milk that is delivered by my milkman in returnable glass bottles, or two organic fried eggs on toast. And I love coffee, so I buy the beans loose and grind them in my blender and enjoy a french press. No wasteful coffee pods!

11am – Shower up. I know, I have a weird routine, but I like showering mid-morning! I use a bar of soap instead of shower gel, a reusable stainless steel safety razor to shave and a shampoo bar to wash my hair. I’m obsessed with Beauty Kubes at the moment – plastic-free shampoo “kubes” that are made in Cornwall and work so well! To condition my hair I rinse with diluted apple cider vinegar… I know it sounds really hippie and I never thought I’d be someone who uses vinegar on my hair, but it works.

I trialled an eco-friendly shampoo bar and here’s what happened…

For deodorant I pat on some bicarbonate of soda. Some people have a reaction to this, like my husband, so he uses a bicarb-free deodorant that we buy in a compostable cardboard tube by Meow Meow Tweet. I also use an organic body butter that comes in a compostable cardboard container. Some people love to DIY their own beauty products – I’ve tried but it’s not my skill set, so instead, I use a few simple kitchen cupboard swaps and buy the rest. Acalaonline.com is a new site selling plastic-free beauty, which I love.

Makeup was one of the hardest things to find low-waste or plastic-free. I started out by simplifying and considered what I truly need: foundation, mascara, eyeliner, lipstick and bronzer. I managed to find an eye kohl by Fat & The Moon that works as both a mascara and an eyeliner and comes in a recyclable metal tin. I love it when a product is multi-purpose! The foundation I use is non-toxic and comes in a metal tin and I use cocoa powder as a bronzer, which I buy from bulk. The only product that comes with a bit of plastic is the lipstick I use but so far, I can’t find an alternative and only use it when I’m filming or at events. I look for brands that use a lot of organic ingredients and minimal plastic-free packaging.

Your ultimate guide to the difference between vegan, natural, organic, clean and fair trade beauty

11:30am – At this point, I’ll either continue with some work at the computer or sit down to film a video for my YouTube channel. I used to work as a TV presenter but after 10 years, work was getting scarce and I had recently discovered the Zero Waste Lifestyle. I wanted to share my experience via YouTube, especially as there weren’t many people in the UK talking about it a few years ago.

1:30pm – Lunch time. I eat something at home most days, and usually rustle up a stir fry using leftover chicken and veggies or some other random concoction. If I’m out and about, I always carry a small reusable cloth bag with me and can easily find an unpackaged sandwich to go straight in from a bakery or deli. And yes, I eat meat. I was vegetarian for 13 years and it made me really ill. The more I read about meat, the more I appreciate the crucial role animals play in regenerating our environment, fighting climate change and nourishing our bodies. Not all meat is created equal, so I only buy local, organic meat, unpackaged!

Sometimes I’ll catch up with a friend for lunch and we’ll go to a nearby café. When eating out, I request no straw in my drink and return the unused paper napkin to the waiter to reuse – I don’t need it.

3pm – I shop for groceries once a week and then top up with store cupboard staples once every few weeks. If I’m doing the weekly shop, I take a few reusable metal tins with me and some cloth bags and an empty egg carton and walk 10 minutes to a local shop, where all of their produce is organic and loose. The butcher puts any meat straight into the containers (and deducts the weight of the container!), and I use cloth bags for bread and soft items like tomatoes and berries, but everything else just goes loose into the basket and then I carry it home in my larger reusable bags.

This incredible woman encouraged 100,000 people to join her in ending period product waste

If I’m stocking up on dry goods, I’ll visit one of the many bulk shops popping up across the country. London now has several locations to shop plastic-free (there’s a list on my blog!). I can also get beer, wine and oil refills, too. I simply weigh the containers and the shop deducts the weight at the checkout. Sounds odd, I know, but I’ve been grocery shopping this way for five years now and it feels totally normal.

My weekly grocery shop takes 30 minutes, including walking, but for those who are really stuck for time, there are now online stores now selling dry goods without plastic, try plasticfreepantry.co.uk or zero-waste-club.com and for veggies, the organicdeliverycompany.co.uk has a plastic-free veg box delivery.

4:30pm – Time for a cuppa! I make tea using loose leaf and a reusable metal tea ball strainer – a bit like a tea bag but reusable and no plastic. Yep, most teabags still contain plastic!

6:30pm – Let’s get cooking! Before adopting a Zero Waste Lifestyle, I wasn’t a fan of cooking. Now, I LOVE it. In the early days, it was difficult to find things like pasta from bulk, so I learned to make my own. Now it’s really easy to find, so I buy it loose, but I’m pleased I learned a new skill. I mostly buy British produce, so it’s seasonal and I just go with the flow in the kitchen. I rarely follow recipes, except when I’m making bread pudding (from leftover bread), homemade custard or homemade tortillas as I need a recipe for those.

We compost food scraps in our small worm bin on the balcony but some things like citrus peels, cooked meat and fats cannot go in there so for now, those get thrown away in a small paper bag. I’m constantly bothering my council to start offering a food waste collection service and they have just started to trial it in a small area. Fingers crossed it comes our way soon.

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7:30pm – My husband and I are real foodies and enjoy a good chat over our evening meal. To drink, we’ll either enjoy a bit of organic wine (from a refill) or a glass of sparkling water from my SodaStream Crystal, which comes with a glass bottle and turns tap water into sparkling in a few seconds. The gas canisters are returnable, too.

10pm – I’m definitely a night owl, and if I have a deadline, I will happily start working on it from 10pm until 2am. I’ve tried to fight it for years, but have come to realise I am most productive and efficient working at night. My husband is the complete opposite, so I try to go to bed early with him most nights. He’s been really great at embracing the Zero Waste Lifestyle, although his initial reaction was, “I’m going to fight you on this” when I tried to take away his beloved cleaning products and replace them with vinegar and reusable cloth rags! Since then, he’s seen the benefits: improved health and spending less (especially on cleaning products!) and he’s realised just how unnecessary and destructive plastic has become.

He’s now the first to start talking about it when people ask about zero waste and friends now send him pictures of their reusable coffee cups. If I had any advice for encouraging friends and family to start reducing plastic, it’s this: don’t preach and lead by example. Guilting people into doing something is the worst. Make it fun, laugh when things go wrong and leave perfection at the door. You do you, and hopefully others will feel inspired.

Ready to get started? Here are our picks of the best shampoo bars to get your ball rolling…

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If there’s one thing we all like to do, it’s complain about celebrities. Sometimes, we complain about their behavior; sometimes, we complain about their money; sometimes, we complain about their horrible sense of fashion (and the awful trends they set); or sometimes, we just complain about their fame. One thing that people definitely love to do is complain about the tipping habits of the stars. Hollywood (and Broadway, for that matter) is always rife with gossip about which reality starlet didn’t leave a tip, or which NFL superstar left $5 on a $500 lobster meal. It happens all of the time. I mean, there’s a reason why NBA legend Scottie Pippen, a Hall of Famer, six-time champion, and second fiddle to Michael Jordan (a man who earned almost $110 million in his career) was referred to as “No-Tipping Pippen” during his time in Chicago because he was a truly terrible tipper and no one ever let him forget it — that’s what happens when you’re a celeb. But, fortunately for us all, and for the news services and entertainment magazines that love human interest and uplifting stories just as much as they love dirt, there are also plenty of celebs out there who are great tippers. I’m not talking great tippers in the way you and I might be, leaving a 25% tip on a $100 check at the local steakhouse because we had a really fun even out. No, I’m talking about the way people with real bank can roll when they want to, flashing wads of cash for pizza delivery boys, baristas, and bartenders. Read on to see who in the entertainment world has been a great tipper in the past and just exactly what they gave.

#1 Charlize Theron – $100 for a $4 Smoothie Sometimes, a celebrity becomes known for being a good tipper even if they didn’t necessarily intend to be one. Now, I’m not saying Charlize Theron isn’t a good tipper in general; I’ve never heard any stories that make me think she’s an evil person or anything like that. But check out this story, and you can decide whether she would have done the same if she had her money with her originally. It seems that Charlize had a hankering for a frozen smoothie or something recently, so she popped into a Pinkberry (a place I myself have never popped into and probably never will) in Hollywood and grabbed a $4 cup of frozen goodness. The only problem was that Charlize didn’t have any cash. She promised to be right back if the counter person let her go with her treat, and the employee did. Charlize did come back about 30 minutes later — with a $100 bill in hand for the employee. Now that’s thanking someone!

#2 Bill Murray – The Coolest Guy in Hollywood I suppose it’s no surprise that Bill Murray would be a great tipper. After all, he appears to be one of the coolest guys to ever hit Hollywood. He also appears to be one of the most down-to-earth dudes who have never forgotten what it’s like to toil in obscurity. If you don’t believe me, you should check out the video of Murray hanging out at a Chicago house party last fall while his beloved Cubs made their incredible run to the World Series championship (yeah, that’s fellow Superfan Eddie Vedder there also). So anyway, what does a regular guy who makes it big do when he’s out on the town? He tips big, if not outrageously. He recently left about a $75 tip on a $60 bill at a local bar. The best part is that Murray is known for doing stuff like this all the time, not just once.

#3 Taylor Swift – $500 Tip Plus Concert Tickets for a Meal On the other hand, it came as a great surprise to me that T-Swift would be such an awesome tipper. Who knew? She completely seems like the type who, if given bad or even mediocre service, would rip the waiter or waitress publicly and maybe even write a song about what a jerk they were to her. Alright, I exaggerate, but “America’s Sweetheart” has developed a reputation as being somewhat of a ‘B,’ so you just never know. It turns out, though, that Tay Tay can be a real queen when she wants to. After a meal at a Philadelphia restaurant a few years back, she left a $500 tip. $500 is a very decent chunk of change. Not only that, but when she found out that the chef’s kid was a huge fan of hers, she gave him two tickets to her concert in town. Wow — that sounds like something Bill Murray would do!

#4 Brad Pitt – $800 for Sushi…in Berlin It just doesn’t seem like a surprise to hear that Brad Pitt is a good tipper. Notice I didn’t say anything about his old flame Angelina Jolie — she seems like the type who might stick you with the butter knife if you didn’t provide perfect service. OK, I jest. But Brad, for all of his well-documented marital issues over the years, really does seem like a plainspoken, normal, genuinely friendly star. There have been varied reports as to his generosity as a tipper over the years but none more remarkable than one from just a few years ago. It seems Brad and Angie really enjoyed a Japanese sushi meal they had in Berlin (yes — sushi in Berlin; we live in a small world these days). In fact, Brad was so pleased, he left an $800 tip and thanked the staff for their service. No word has come out on whether Angie approved.

#5 Ellen DeGeneres – Tipped The Pizza Guy $1000 At The 2014 Oscars Ellen sure seems like someone who enjoys giving a good tip. Am I right or am I right? After all, everyone knows how generous she can be on her hit daytime TV show The Ellen DeGeneres Show. Not only did she come up with the Christmas-themed “Twelve Days of Giveaways,” where everyone in her audience gets tons of really pricey freebies, but she even expanded that initiative to a spring giveaway as well. So sure, we all know Ellen is pretty cool. But how cool is she for real, I ask you? Well, apparently, she is all that all the time, too. A case in point occurred during her bit at the 2014 Oscars when Ellen tipped a pizza delivery guy $1,000 for bringing her and the other stars a few slices. No, I don’t know how many pizzas he actually delivered, but it would have to be like $7,000 to justify a tip that size — that’s hundreds of pizzas. Somehow, I think Ellen’s tip was based on generosity, not quantity… Well, and a bit of publicity, too.

#6 David Beckham – 1000 Percent of $100 Equals? Good old Becks has all the money in the world, all the fame in the world, every major soccer championship that matters, a movie named after him (Bend It Like Beckham) and a hot wife who was once a Spice Girl. So it’s really no wonder that he supposedly enjoys being a good guy when he’s out on the town. Hard work, talent, and a little bit of luck gave him a life many people would envy — why not share? That’s exactly what he did a few seasons ago when he was still playing for the LA Galaxy of MLS. Beckham brought a few teammates into a restaurant called Joxer Daily’s Pub for a few beers and apps. The bill came to $100. I bet you can guess how much of a tip Becks left the astounded waitress. That’s right — he added one more zero to the total for the tip and left an amazing 1,000% tip of… $1,000.

#7 Jessica Simpson – Leaves Big Tip, Plus Handwritten Notes. Jessica has been in the public eye for a long time now and has always been someone that pretty much nobody has any problem making fun of, regardless of how hot she is. However, nobody has ever accused her of being mean or uncool, as far as I know. In fact, Jessica seems pretty nice as a person, something that’s supported by her tipping actions. Way back in 2011, Simpson was dining at New York City’s Lavo restaurant and was obviously moved to excess by her meal. She left a $300 tip. Her check was $500, which means Jess gave her waitress a staggering 60% tip. Not only that — she also left a cool note that said, “You were amazing and make this world a better place. Love, Jess.” Hmm, it’s known that she had a dinner of veal parm, fried Oreos, and Macallan. I wonder if the scotch had anything to do with the tip???

#8 Russell Crowe – $800 and a Guitar Solo This one is probably going to come as a shocker to most of you readers out there. I know it did to me — not because Russell isn’t an awesome actor — he’s been in a ton of seminal movies like L.A. Confidential, A Beautiful Mind, Gladiator (for which he won a Best Actor Oscar), and The Insider (for which he should have won a Best Actor Oscar), to name just a few. The man has serious talent. He also seems to have a serious knack for getting into trouble publicly, especially with the paparazzi. Perhaps that’s the key right there — he gets into trouble when he’s hounded. When he’s left alone except for good service, as apparently happened at The Carew Inn in Wales in 2009 while he was filming Robin Hood, Russell can be quite a charmer. Not only did the superstar leave a tip of nearly $800 to his servers there, but he also pulled out a guitar and sang for the wait staff. Now that’s service with a smile.

#9 Amy Schumer – $1000 on a $77 Bill Her tips might not be the absolute largest on this list, but there’s a reason Amy Schumer is pretty high up this list: because she keeps on giving great tips. It’s not a one-time deal with her. Some celebrities never forget their roots, which makes it easier for them to remember the little guy. Back when she was a struggling New York City actress, Amy bartended and waited tables to make ends meet, so she knows firsthand what the life is all about. Maybe that’s why she once left an $80 tip on a tiny bill with a handwritten note that said, “I’ve been there; I get it. You guys are great.” Not only that, but just last year, while attending everyone’s favorite musical Hamilton, she left a $1,000 tip for the bartenders working the lobby during intermission. That’s right — $1,000. Her total bill you ask? $77. Now that’s classy.

#10 Dr. Dre – Shocker of the Year Some guys work hard to make their bones and never seem to forget their own origin story, rewarding the “little guy” later in their lives. Three years ago, thanks to his massive Beats by Dr. Dre empire and his success as a producer, the infamous Dr. Dre became a billionaire, joining the ranks of some very exclusive celebrities indeed. For perspective, Taylor Swift and Adele combined don’t make one billionaire — at least not yet. So what do you do when you become a billionaire? Well, in June 2014, Dre first bought Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen’s old mansion for $40 million. Then, I assume, to celebrate his new status, the hip-hop mogul went out to party at the Hollywood watering hole Skybar. He must have had himself a damn good evening because at the end of it, rather than dropping the mic, he dropped a $5,000 tip on the unsuspecting wait staff. Now that, my friends, is what’s called in his business as fronting!

#11 Johnny Depp – $4000 for Wine! Everyone knows that Johnny Depp is one of the coolest celebrities out there (well, everyone except for Amber Heard, it turns out). I mean, the guy makes both monster franchise hit movies and cool offbeat ones, he plays in a band called “Hollywood Vampires” with Joe Perry and Alice Cooper, and he has all of the coolest tattoos money can buy. Apparently, money can buy some other things, too — things like absolute notoriety for being an awesome tipper. It seems that Johnny has long been known to be an excellent tipper, but one incident in Chicago takes the cake (or wine, as the case may be). Johnny was there filming the movie Public Enemies and spent many an evening at the Chicago steakhouse institution Gibson’s. On one of his last nights there, he and friends consumed a ton of $500 bottles of wine and left in a good mood. He left his server in an even better mood since he tipped the lucky guy $4,000! Yup, that’s three zeroes.

#12 Charles Barkley – $25K for Blackjack Dealer If there’s one thing you can count on with Charles Barkley, it’s that he’s not shy at all about speaking his mind whether you agree with him or not. So we have this next tipping story on good authority — Sir Charles himself. In 2014, during an appearance on The Conan O’Brien Show, Charles told Conan that he thought it was important for stars and celebs to tip well. Basically, he said, if you’re in that position, use it for good. To prove his point, he brought up a $25,000 tip he once left to a blackjack dealer after he had won $700,000. The best part of his story, however, is that Charles felt a little bit guilty about not tipping more. I’m not sure he needs to though. In fact, I’m pretty sure that blackjack dealer would let him shoot at his table again any old time. Nothing but net, Charles — nothing but net!

#13 Paris Hilton – $47K Tip at Nightclub Here’s another celebrity whom everyone likes to gang up on, whether it be for her awful sex tape, her terrible reality show excesses, her weird choice of “career” as a DJ, or her actual excesses of wealth. If you’ve ever seen the pictures of the dog house she “built” her $13,000 Pomeranian, then you know just how wasteful and decadent Paris seems to the real world. But get this: in 2014, Paris decided to party with some friends at New York City nightclub Marquee. And oh, what a party it was, as they bought $100,000 worth of champagne (Cristal, mostly) and spent almost another $100,000 on many, many bottles of Grey Goose and Patron. I’m assuming that they shared it out — Grey Goose isn’t that expensive. Anyway, when it came time to pay the bar bill, Paris surprised everyone by putting down a massive $47,000 tip. It seems an evening with Paris might be worth it after all!

#14 Jay Z – 50K on $250,000 Bill Here’s the deal with rappers, producers, DJs, MCs and the whole hip-hop community in general: not only do they usually really like to party, but they also really like their bling, and they really, really like to show how flush with cash they are. It should be zero surprise then to note that Jay Z, who is pretty much the most successful guy in that industry ever, would like to throw his money around. I mean, just check out any one of his videos for proof! In real life, Jay Z was once partying with his crew in a Miami nightclub. When I say “partying,” please remember that the very rich are very different from you and me. Jay Z dropped over $250,000 on champagne at this nightclub. So what do you do when you run up a quarter-of-a-million-dollar bar tab? Well, you tip the bartenders $50,000, of course. Yup, you read that right — $50,000 on a freaking bar tip.

#15 Nicolas Cage (Sort Of…) Alright, alright… maybe I lied just a little bit here. Nic Cage himself wasn’t actually the one delivered the largest tip to a waitress that anyone has ever heard about. All he did was play the guy in the movie based on this real-life story. I mean, I’m willing to bet that there are some crazy tipping stories out there about the man who played Ghost Rider, both good and bad, but this one is just a case of him and Bridget Fonda making a true story more famous than it ever would have been otherwise. What really happened is that Yonkers cop Robert Cunningham, a regular at a joint called South Pizzeria, offered to split any winnings from a lottery ticket with his usual waitress, Phyllis Penzo. Each of them chose three numbers and forgot about it for a few days. That is, until their Pick-Six turned into a $6-million winner. And yes, Bob did the right thing without even thinking about it, splitting the ticket with Phyllis. She walked away with a $3 million tip, the largest in history.

Source: TheRichest