#voyagehcme — 04

[doctornota]

"YEAH, AND I CAN TELL YOU WHY, TOO." He can't argue with that, after all, Leonard is well aware that he has been operating at an unreasonably high level of stress since... since hell if he knows. "I happened to be perfectly relaxed most of my life up until I met you." Not even Jim's fault, not really, but the Academy was stressful and dear god, deep space is stressful. Every single thing about the Enterprise is - was - stressful beyond belief.

What's his excuse here? Well, he'll let you know once he figures it out.

"I could be on a beach somewhere," he mumbles. He watches the other skaters on the rink, the way they effortlessly glide and even spin. "We're going to the beach next time." He toes the ice with the front of a skate, briefly entertaining the idea of pushing off and seeing what happens before ultimately chickening out. "Okay, since you're the expert. What am I doing here?"

THERE'S A LAUGH THAT COMES OUT OF HIM at the comment. If it was anyone else , Jim maybe would've taken the threat seriously. But Bones ? Even if he wanted to ( and there was no doubt in his mind that he wanted to ) there was no way in hell he would purposefully cause them both to fall. Not when he was just complaining about the hypothetical surgery they would both need.

❛ JESUS. YOU'RE GOING TO HIT SOMEONE before you end up actually falling. ❜ Flailing your arm around is definitely the best way to keep stable. It's better than , you know , actually taking the advice of the guy trying to help you. But what does Jim know ?

HE ROLLS HIS EYES SKYWARD. He would facepalm , but if he lets go of Bones he fears they will both end up face down on the ice. ❛ Yeah , well , you need to work on that , too. ❜ Jim watches as he straightens himself up , before raising an eyebrow at him. ❛ Y'know , I don't think I ever have seen you relaxed. Even three drinks in you can still find something to be stressed about. ❜

[doctornota]

LIKE THAT'S NOT BAD ENOUGH ALREADY. At least there's a Jim-shaped buffer here, though he's not sure if he'd wind up feeling better or worse if they both crash into somebody.

"I might." It is a slightly-murderous threat. "Only be fair of me to keep you on your toes for once," instead of the other way around. His free arm pinwheels as he finds his center of balance - a tricky thing, when he's so certain his feet will go flying out from under him any second now - and the other still clings to Jim.

"I do walk leaning forward. I've got places to be," and half the time he's running because Starfleet is nothing if not a test of his endurance, all day every day. But he straightens his back enough to look like a slightly more put-together human being rather than a horse who's forgotten how to use its legs. "And I'm relaxed. I am. This is relaxing. You know, where I grew up we used to stay away from the water in the winter, and that always seemed plenty fun to me."

IT'S A LOOK THAT HE KNOWS FAR TOO WELL. It's that look that Bones gives him when he wants to say damn it , Jim without actually saying a word. It's like he's only got a limited number of them that he's saving for more important occasions , so he has to ration them out and settle for glaring daggers at him instead. ❛ For one , it's a public rink. Worst you can do is run into someone. ❜ Or have someone run into you. And Jim knows full well they're not going to be going fast enough for the former to matter. The latter ? Well . . that one he's not so sure of. ❛ I wouldn't promise anything if I didn't expect you to. ❜

❛ WE WON'T NEED SURGERY , BONES , unless you really intend on screwing up that bad. ❜ There was a part of him that genuinely thought the guy was just exaggerating , but as he immediately almost topples Jim over by virtue of using him as support - he's starting to slightly regret this. But admitting that to Bones would be like a death sentence. ❛ Well , first thing you gotta do is stand up straight. ❜ A hand still rests firmly on the other man's arm to keep him from immediately eating shit. ❛ You don't walk leaning forward , so you can't skate like that either. Just relax , alright ? I've got you. ❜

[doctornota]

JIM RECEIVES AN ABSOLUTELY FED-UP LOOK. He's not being any kind of way - except for rational, maybe. Or at least he's trying to be. Kirk drags him into a lot of irrationally bad ideas, some worse than others. This is pretty low on the list, all things considered. "I've fully got no idea what in the hell could possibly make you think that," that Leonard's balance could have even remotely improved since the last time around ( they'd spent a lot of winters in California and even more up in space where they only ran into naturally-occurring ice every once in a while; obviously Jim has dragged him into holodeck-provided snow once or twice and it's never ended well ), that is. "But if you're gonna be fool enough to make a promise about it, well, then I'll just have to hold you to it."

But then he says that very often and only drags Jim through a guilt trip over the things that don't really matter - Jim has never once broken a promise that did matter, not by Leonard's measurements. Whether not getting his legs busted by this damn foolish venture matters enough to qualify is up for debate.

"Oh, yeah, because the only thing I love more than performing surgery on myself is performing surgery on both of us. You know me so well." But he can't really effectively dig his heels in even if he wanted to and he's already come this far, even if the first uncertain step onto the ice nearly does end with both of them flat on their asses ( clawing like a drowning cat at Jim does assist greatly with maintaining his balance ). "Jesus. There's a trick to this, right?" Pizza, french fry... that might be skiing. "You seriously used do this for fun?"

THE WIDE , SHIT - EATING GRIN ON JIM'S FACE says everything Bones needs to know. He knows full well that it's ( almost ) impossible for the Doctor to say no to him. Granted , things are a little different now that he's technically not required by Starfleet regulations to follow his orders : he could've said no if he really wanted to. And yet here he is. Even though he's taken twenty minutes just to get his skates on to buy himself some time , he wasn't forced to come. But he is going to be forced to skate since he did show up.

❛ DON'T BE THAT WAY. ❜ It's just ice skating. An activity made specially for an Iowa boy such as himself. Yet again , Bones doesn't even like winter in the holodeck. So his reluctance shouldn't really come as a surprise. ❛ It'll be different this time. I promise. ❜ It takes all of his effort to bite back his laughter as McCoy takes a step forward.

HIS PLEAS ARE MET WITH A SHAKE OF HIS HEAD as he continues to coax him towards the ice. ❛ You're not gonna bust your ass , Bones. I'll be right there the entire time. And if for some reason you do fall , you'll probably end up taking both of us with you. That'll cheer you up. ❜

[doctornota]

HE'LL NEVER KNOW WHY HE LETS HIMSELF GET TALKED INTO SHIT LIKE THIS. They're just asking for a sprained ankle, a broken bone. The only small mercy is that it's an artificial rink - no way on god's green earth he's stepping foot onto a frozen pond or some such nonsense - but even then, McCoy is deliberately slow in tying ( and then re-tying ) his skates, looking for all the world like a man being sentenced to death.

"Funny how you're always saying that," or at least something to that effect. Usually it'll be fun, or, similarly, it'll be fine, and it is never fun nor fine. So yeah, he has no doubt this won't be easy, either. "And yet it never is." But he clasps Jim's hand with a sigh anyhow, hauling himself up to his feet and clinging with a death grip onto his arm, terror barely concealed within his eyes at the first wobbly, shuffling step.

"No— no, no no, hold on. Jim, I can't even stand in these things, I'm gonna bust my ass out there!"

@doctornota liked for a winterfes starter. RINK AROUND THE CIRCUITS

❛ C'mon , Bones ! ❜ Jim stands after lacing up his skates , extending a hand to help the man get his balance. One of the things he missed the most about Iowa winters was the chance to skate on a frozen lake. He knows the doctor was far more skeptical of it all , being a Georgia boy and all , but it was a winter activity that he couldn't miss out on. And he certainly wasn't going to do it alone.

❛ Up and at 'em. ❜ He turns to start leading him to the ice. ❛ It'll be easy , just follow my lead ! ❜