#vbros kano

[latibulater]

When Rusty is eleven, his father sits him down in the living room and tells him there will be a new baby soon. A lady friend of Jonas will be dropping off a brother for Rusty and hadn't the boy talked about wanting a playmate? It was true; Rusty was always asking for friends. This wasn't what he had meant.

He watched on as a room near his was converted from a guest bedroom into a nursery. H.E.L.P.eR. constantly whizzed by, claws full of baby clothes, formula, or toys. Rusty stared as Uncle Gentleman and Uncle Action helped his dad move out the queen-sized bed and spare workout equipment, before moving a crib and large bookshelf into the room.

"Are you alright, Master Rusty?"

"Kano! Don't sneak up on me like that!" He complained, but calmed down when the man's large hand ruffled his hair. Kano sat down at the table next to the boy and ate some cereal out of the box. "Aren't you going to help Pops?"

"They have it well in hand," said Kano. "You seem down and out."

Rusty crossed his arms. "What? No. It's just weird to see Pops not working on any new science project, or going out on the X-1 for a mission."

Kano ate some more cereal and swallowed before saying, "Yes, he rarely stays in one place. But, I heard he was like this when you were born."

"Really?"

"Yes, I was not yet...a part of Team Venture, but I've heard stories from Gentleman and Action Man of his late nights obsessing over what to name you and what books to buy."

"Oh," Rusty said surprised. "That's....that's really nice. I guess I never imagined Pops doing stuff like that for me." Kano sighed and took his glasses off to clean them. He was quiet before putting them back on. He placed a hand of Rusty's thin shoulder for a second.

"Your father..."Rusty watched with wide eyes as the strong man struggled with the shape of his phrasing. "Dr. Venture is a very passionate man," Kano settled on. "He saw, and still does see, you as his greatest project. One that required much start-up care, but needs less now that you are up and running. Does that make sense?"

"And this baby...will be the newest greatest project?" Rusty asked tentatively. Kano waved his hands frantically.

"No, no, no, see, ah shit, what is the right translation- Master Rusty, please understand," Kano said. "The new child, he is unplanned. You will always be your father's first born, his chosen child. Not that your father won't care for the new baby, no in fact he could have sent the child to the orphanage, but he didn't, because he is...he is a good man."

Rusty couldn't believe his ears. "The baby would have gone to the orphanage? Why?"

Kano blanched and looked up at the ceiling. "You see, um, well, the mother-"

A hand clamped down on Rusty's shoulder. "The tramp won't be in the picture for much longer," Uncle Gentleman said. "Soon as she pops out the bugger and gives him to Jonas, she'll be leaving."

"But why?" Rusty asked.

"She's a whore," his uncle explained, tapping his cane on the kitchen tile. "Completely unfit to be a mother, honestly the best thing she's done is tell Jonas instead of fishing it out with a wire."

He tried to the visual but it made Rusty nauseous. "If she's so awful, why did Pops make a baby with her?" Kano's face scrunched up, discomfited, but Gentleman easily explained.

"A man has to spread his wild oats, boy, you'll understand once you start growing some hair on your chest. A man can't always be picky about what field he's sowing either. I wouldn't worry about it too hard, laddie, you'll have plenty more to worry about once the little imp arrives."

Rusty frowned into his cereal.

"Oh, buck up, Thad," Uncle Gentleman clapped him on the back and walked away to the refrigerator. He opened the door, saying, "Being an older brother is supposed to be quite the privilege."

"It is," Kano quietly asserted.

Gentleman complained, "Why certainly, all my older brothers were privileged," swinging a pitcher of lemonade around. CLANK: it was set down on the counter. "Always getting me in trouble or taking my chores money," the man grumbled. The man poured himself a drink and did not continue speaking, reminiscing only to himself. Kano leaned into close the conversation.

"It is a privilege to be an older brother, but it also will come with its own challenges and puzzles. It will be your hardest and longest adventure, but brothers can become the best of friends. Plus," Kano smiled, "once the little one is a little older, the two of you together can team up on your father. Maybe force him to listen you."

Rusty giggled at the idea of him and a tinier Thaddeus hanging off Jonas,. Together they could convince him to set down his tools and listen to a show on the radio. It'd be nice having a literal brother-in-arms. One thought struck Rusty's brain and made him freeze.

"I won't have to change any diapers, will I?"

[horrorsequel]

erm....go team venture?

[whats-9plus10]

Saving the venture bros within the confines of the UMG copyright strike purge

[garyfischy]

UWAAAAAAAAH

redraw of screencap under cut

[hitrone]

[supersecretventureblog]

Faking Miracles - Screenshots

[spicyoftheearth]

hi!! another vbros self shipper here :3

OMG WITH KANO!!! Your taste is impeccable <3

[moonlitkilljoy]

@giftober 2022 | day 7: one color

Blue Morpho (+ Kano) from The Venture Bros. Seasons 6 & 7

[butterflies-and-handgrenades]

The Guild over on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/guildofcharitousintent/ has kindly asked me to kick off their DTIYS (draw this in your style) challenge

I'm beyond excited to see what everyone's versions are going to look like 

Check out their page if you want to enter the challenge

( I'm https://www.instagram.com/butterflies_and_handgrenades/ if you guys didn't already know lol)

[pants-shitter-ultimate]

ok i PRIDE MYSELF in being the world’s biggest kano stan.. like i have not met another vbros fan who stans him harder than I do

[latibulater]

Venture Bros Rewatch notes: Ghosts of the Sargasso

i have seen this episode like. 5 or 6 times. at least twice more than any other episode bc i specifically use this episode as the first episode i show people so i make them watch this one first with me before we start at the beginning. i just think its the perfect balance between the 50s action spoof and the vbros own brand of humor. i havent even clicked play or gotten my drink ready i just love this episode sm

okay i think this is the second time we have seen jonas for more than 2 seconds (in the bixby episode) and he really comes off as a caring leader, even him telling Kano to take Rusty downstairs its very pragmatic and is very well written to copy the tone of 50s scifi heroes. he keeps major tom (HAH) on the line and the voice acting is very earnest

also his terry cloth suit that he looks pretty good in and then adult rusty has his own tailored version but it looks silly instead

"ashes...to ashes...*sobs*" action man's first appearance also at his most soft...need to see the extreme sexual tension between rodney and tom now

i LOVE the background painting the sunset is a beautiful wash on the seascape

brock's OUTFIT. his HAT. the STRIPES. seriously we never get this back again

"one flyboy goes boom" rusty definitely said this one time to jonas and got smacked

dean's little polo! rusty's emphasis on him saying "over" over. and hank also has a cute green shirt on we really got a fun wardrobe change and it was never revisited

DEAN AND BROCK NOT ON MUTE

the funniest part is the fact that rusty's device......works???? but not how it should???? like when you solve for x and the teacher says idhtf you got to the answer like this

"i think dean might have a bladder infection" this whole line is SO PARENTAL

"oh i thought it might be nice if your voice was in the background" GAYYYYY

DUHDHDUH DUHJ DUHJ DUHJ DUHDUHDUHJ DUHJ DUHJ sick arc

"hank, nobody said pirates don't exist"

the guy who says "my sward is made of cwardbwoard" his shirt said RELAX

"is that guy dead?" "yeah" "CMON was that necessary?"

"THE GHOST PIRATE RULES" !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

the fog machine and screen projector guys.....HOMOSE-

like rusty turns up the "volume" of the machine and the animation is done to make the viewer believe that the effect radiated does ACTUALLY disturb the ghost of major tom. WHY IS RUSTY SO BAD AT MECHANICS YET SO ACCIDENTALLY GOOD AT SOULS.....oh god its because he's been re-born so much

Brock telling Hank not to smoke LMAO

Look. I'm just saying. this entire "sit on my lap" is SO aware of how its the prelude to a pirate x twink porn scene. and then it just totally pivots "no i dont want to" "fine dont" and its SO FUNNY because the pirate capt is just like so in the role but also just a totally chill guy

dean and the captain's back and forth about the ghost screams made me CRACK UP the first few times i saw it "IF YOU WOULD JUST SHUT UP FOR A SECOND"

i wont lie i also copied hank when brock explained the "grab the handle bush the button" i will be inserting that into my random knowledge gained from fiction

Rusty stuck in the clam and vomiting all over himself like he didnt just piss all over himself

okay but the way the capt thinks brock is dean's dad this is a great setup for the capt in s7 to make homo-assumptions

"with guys?" "with guys" "with guys mike"

Brock saying first "okay crybaby" when Hank doesn't want to kill, and then when he thinks Hank is the one who made the ghost wail, he immediately pivots and says "there's no reason to get upset i'll get you through this" like you can out a midwestern man in the army but you cant take the midwestern out of the bodyguard

BROCK"S FIRST EXCUSE IS ITS UP HIS ASS. ITS UP HIS ASS WHY DONT YOU CHECK. no one this man never found his p-spot in bootcamp

rusty's robot legs blowing up.......oooooooh it'd be fun rusty losing his legs

"i have fOunD tHe sAUCEEEEEERRRRR!"

i know it's implied brock kills those guys but both them appear in the spiderskull museum opening night episode there's no way those guys dont have ass nightmares

rusty getting yanked away from the saucer :( i genuinely would be so fucking beyond pissed

"oh my god am i bleeding" the capt is SO SILLY "what kind of expert bodyguard ties men up with big bows" but hank is SILLIER

"WOAh no...NO WAY"

"this is plastic, and that, thats a ghost!"

"you live by the ghost, you die by the ghost" BEST. LINE. EVER.

capt have a screaming skull temporary tattoo on his hand

ORPHEUS using magic to cook literally king i love him i want to *** *** ** *** ****** ***** *** *** *** ********* *** *** ****

Rusty almost dying again, seriously I just. can't imagine the mindset this guy must have

Orpheus' garage has PILES of Jonas' records. GREAT fic setup. also Orpheus swishing his wine. "to use. as a PEN, hank." seriously early vbros is SOOOOOOOO good its so character driven in its animation

Brock just showing up and throwing the skeleton ghost of major tom off the boat like. does he stop screaming. what happens with his soul. i have so many questions yet....none of it really matters in the face of how funny it is floating down on top of rusty's head

Venture Bros Rewatch notes: Eeney Meeney Miney Magic

I love Rusty's bedroom but do we think that look is a holdover from the last time Jonas remodeled (as it's not dated enough to be 60s when the compound was built) or did Rusty remodel the bedroom as soon as he inherited the master bedroom?

Dean and Hank are playing Ouija is so cute

ENTERING....MR ORPHEUS. He comes OUT of the orphan heart machine (??? why?) and zaps Helper and knocks out Dean and Hank, so Dr. O can disable electronics and also cause instant sleep all with just a single nonverbal look...And his lankiness...his sharp edges...EARLY SEASON ORPHEUS ILU

"His magical Dracula powers" "youre standing there in FLAMES" whoever wrote this scene has a child

"brock is it okay if i cry?" after brock just choked him for waking the bodyguard up too sudden. there is both so much to say yet nothing needs to be said its all there

i can't figure out if you need to go outside to get to orpheus' part of the compound, dean is wearing a jacket over his pjs but no shoes and rusty has his rarely seen bathrobe and slippies

"abandoned arachnid lab" WHAT was GOING ON????

i LOVE the pan-ups for introducing characters

Orpheus was saving Helper........"his feeble mind had perceived what's not possible" this is contributing to my idea that our Helper is like Ben's Helper in that they are uh....not cyborgs exactly but meaty machines

Led zeppelin is pretty much the only music brock listen to during sex

How does Rusty not know Orpheus' name already? He's literally the landlord

"junior college upstate" "fEEL it's evil grip PuUUUUUULL ME BACK IN"

"scuba" "scuba" "scuba"

TRIANA girl of the hour. How is she so well adjusted and normal-acting. I want so badly to see a scene or two of Triana at school. Can she use her magic there? Is she is similar classes as Dermott?

"Single parent eh? Common ground" Rusty is so desperate for a friend as soon as he realizes Orpheus is bit like him he drops all snobbish pretenses

THE QTIP COMMENT. I LAUGH. "a walking reminder of our common shame"

"I saw him kill a guy with sock full of party snaps" okay but then doesn't in the next episode Dean get confused about Brock killing people at all? The whole body bags were sleeping bags bit? More evidence of mind erasure

"I'm kind of home tutored in a box my pop made. it sometimes gets very hot in the box. that my pop made" "wow that's kinda screwy" this is the entire moment of what made Triana hang out with dean and her bemusement tolerance and at the end (before prom) fondness

Brock fixing Helper is soooooooo sexy i wish i could chew on his forearms like a rawhide bone

Hank seeing an endless expanse of nature with Rusty wanting to spend time with him, contrasted then by Brock actually being the one present to get Hank out of the way

"we two doctor dads" LITERALLY RUSTY STOP he's got an instant crush and he is just so thrilled to have someone to hang out with. okay with the message O leaves for Triana who just left for school, but at the end she gets bored waiting for her dad at dinner. they seriously spend all day at rusty's lab?

"dont think i didnt notice the neon appointments" GAY BOYS

Rusty acting like an overly typical irate father, he was so channeling jonas trying to impress the only other single father he's ever met

BROCK WITH THE PULLED BACK HAIR MEOW

"i DARE you to make less sense!"

Orpheus just pulled...a singular cupcake with pink frosting out of an upper cabinet....why do the Ventures live like this. 4 boys and a robot.

okay but the whole kitchen scene is so funny and really contrasting rusty and orpheus' character designs, in s1 orpheus really is all long lines and huge blocky black cloak, compared to rusty's tiny little frame, honestly we need more ...(rustyxorpheus=.....thapheus?) of this. the way rusty asks if he wants another brew "kaey"

hank's impression of their dad is hilarious

"the beast hungers for them...i just dont get how they can get the door open"

Orpheus commands the open "by the crimson name of lord balayseeta(?) i command you to open" and shit really DOES open for like a mile around and in-universe implications are that somehow Rusty has created this deeply magic resistant bio-engineered machine

the whole play by play about the orphan heart...........it was probably a clone of hank or dean....

marco

POLO

mAARRRRCO

polo polo!

m a r c o

POLO

Brock sitting down to hug Dean for feeling bad that is so sweet.

True love seems to be flimsy yet real and based upon chemicals, so could be the person they love most who makes their brainvlight up most when they see them

the way Orpheus stretches out his hands and launches it at the joycan to go into hell. he can just send shit to hell if he wants. and he can NOT go to hell or traverse, but he punches one way tickets.

i LOOOOOOOOOVE this episode truly 9/10

[horrorsequel]

it’s literally

“hey don, you know your friend and your sidekick? that’s actually my property now, thank you”. justice for kano he should’ve killed the guy

like i get so insanely mad. ur right jonas is only going super hell theres no saving that guy. the wooooorst the WORST

[whats-9plus10]

Some Gary expressions I really appreciated when making the Blue Morpho edit plus an extra Dr. Mrs

[garyfischy]

I wish I could have an open discussion of racism in vbros like that homestuck panel. But i dont think theres enough nonwhite venture bros fans for that LOL

also no offense but white people are convinced liking something means liking EVERYTHING about it. I love venture bros but the "satirical" racism is not my jam ok.

i could write a blog post about it and get more hate anons about how im a fake fan....

like some of the racism is supposed to parody jonny quest era shit but just ends up rehashing it, i shouldnt have to explain why a girl in stereotypical "indian" clothing being played straight is a bad choice. Or like. Just random bits like pete white making asian jokes or henchman 21 making asian jokes or the entirety of the pilot

its bad for nonwhite fans trying to actually criticize media they like already, but with something like vbros, its already regarded as super progressive for its time or whatever when it rlly isnt. Its attitudes around race are regressive and very White Liberal- insensitive commentary that really shouldnt have been written by 2 white dudes. Or offputting "jokes" that serve no other purpose than just rehashing racism. The parody angle only goes so far before it becomes Actual Racism (the kano can't drive because he's ASIAN jokes werent funny the first 2 times). The parody angle doesnt provide any interesting commentary on race other than "hey, isnt it so funny how they were racist back then?" .

this is nonsense sorry

[garlic8reath]

Spoilers for Vbros S7 episode 1

Pete White’s Kill Count: 1

Pete really is Rusty’s best friend lmfao... Now just get him to take out Col. Gentleman, Action Man, and Hatred and we’ll be set lol

((normally I’d add this commentary in the tags but I wanna avoid even hinting at spoilers so: I fuckin HATE original team venture and would be happy if they died; Kano is MAYBE the exception; they’re literally all horrible child abusers and deserve to suffer; also Col. Gentleman is I’m pretty certain a fuckin pedo creep as well so he especially can go to hell))

[supersecretventureblog]

Now Museum, now you don't - Screenshots