#valjean and cosette aw

[pilferingapples]

I think it's interesting that Valjean only starts getting GOOD at Crime when he's had his big Redemption Realization and started trying to do Good

his former heists? terrible. Awful. He stole One Loaf of Bread, Badly, some tableware, clumsily, and a coin from a literal child, accidentally. He got caught on EVERY ESCAPE, sometimes nigh instantaneously. Crime Skills Level after 19 years in the bagne: Garbage Tier. Absolute Garbage Tier.

But zoom ahead a little to M-sur-M and he's breaking and entering and leaving money like magic! Fooling the world's most suspicious cop! Faking an entire identity like he was born to it! Jailbreaks so smooth and uncomplicated that Hugo won't even tell us about it!

Roll on to him raising Cosette and he's even better! He fakes his own death multiple times to fool multiple authorities and it WORKS! He is faking his identity well enough to be a National Guard AND have (ownership? really good leases?) on multiple properties! He escapes a house full of cops and vanishes entirely, AFTER having been tied up and seriously injured (by himself)! He escapes an ARMY! He forges an entire New New Identity for Cosette! His criminal ways cannot be stopped, so long as he's doing it for a selfless reason!

...I really don't know what to make of all this (why is better at Crimes from a few months out of prison than from all the time he spent with other thieves IN prison? What Changed? Is he just calmer? ) but "Be Selfless, Kick Ass At Crime" is a hilarious Les Mis message that well deserves to keep company with "Lie to authorities always constantly" XD

[kim-the-miserable-rat]

I SAW A TIKTOK WHERE A GUY SAID THAT "LES MIS" WAS JUST A THREE HOUR MUSICAL OF THE FRENCH COMPLAINING

(and I mean, he's not entirely wrong.)

(JUST ACT 1 CAUSE I UNDERESTIMATED HOW LONG THIS WOULD TAKE ME)

So here's a list of what they complain about in each song:

LOOK DOWN: the prison system sucks

PROLOGUE: the life of an exconvict sucks

VALJEAN'S SOLILOQUY: this guy is too nice how dare he? And also the prison system still sucks.

AT THE END OF THE DAY: my workplace is full of cunts

I DREAMED A DREAM: men are the worst

LOVELY LADIES: selling my necklace, hair and becoming a prostitute to help my child is something that I have all the right to be mad about (she's completely right, Fantine you deserved sooooo much better queen)

FANTINE'S ARREST: (to the bourgeoisie asshole) stop dehumanizing me I will fight you (to javert) your justice is not fair (to Jean Valjean) It's kinda your fault that im in this situation tbh

THE RUNAWAY CART: (javert) YO HOMIE WTF ARE YOU HULK? [suspecting]or are you buff because of slavery?.....

WHO AM I?: Oh poo! Now I have to choose between lying (it will make god sad) or going back to jail (hundreds of people will lose their jobs and end up living in misery by my actions) Fuck them workers, im an honest man, lets save that one innocent man.

THE TRIAL: the justice system is flawed. Look at my sick ass tattoo in my chest. Ok nvm im going to se Fantine fuck you all.

FANTINE'S DEATH: I will never see my daughter again this is so unfair (it really is)

THE CONFRONTATION: (Jean Valjean) Javert could you FUCKING WAIT A SECOND! I HAVE SOMETHING IMPORTANT TO DO(Javert) Im going to drop all my lore in two lines that you will not get cause were all singing at the same time; and NO, you can't just go, WTF?

CASTLE ON A CLOUD: HELLO, CHILD SLAVERY???? SOMEBODY HELP THIS CHILD ASAP!!!

MASTER OF THE HOUSE: Madam Thenardier has a solo just to talk shit about his husband (and he deserves every bit of it)

THE BARGAIN: (Thenardiers) NO, OF COURSE YOU CAN'T TAKE OUR LITTLE TREASURE AWAY -unless you pay for her, that is-

PARIS (look down reprise): EVERYTHING IS AWFUL, WE HATE IT HERE!

THE ROBBERY: (Eponine) FUCK YOU MARIUS MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS! (Javert) Ewwww... i hate criminals! and also poor people. Same thing to me, really.

STARS: I'm so obsessed with that fugitive that it's starting to blur into an homoerotic desire. Also HOW DARE HE to be free? I will hunt him for sport

EPONINE'S ERRAND: (Eponine) So now I have to help YOU, the boy im in love with to find a random girl? ALSO WTF DON'T GIVE ME MONEY YOU ASSHOLE.

ABC CAFE: (Enjolras) STOP WHINING MARIUS, NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOUR NON EXISTENT LOVE LIFE, WE ARE PLANNING A REVOLUTION HERE, YOU KNOW? Also please guys can we take this thing seriously? Please please please :(

DO YOU HEAR THE PEOPLE SING?: (the people, obviously) time to eat the rich or die trying!

RUE PLUMMET/IN MY LIFE: (Cosette) father, ur cool to be around and all that but.... Who the fuck are you? And why do we act like we are convicts running from the law (cause ur dad kinda is, sweetie)

A HEART FULL OF LOVE: (Eponine) It fucking sucks to have helped my crush find the girl he's in love with[who would have thought?] Guess I will look at them longingly from like five feet away while they confess their love for each other and purposefully ignore me.

THE ATTACK ON RUE PLUMMET: (Eponine) GODAMNIT they will think I'm one of those assholes I have to do something! Go away or I'll scream IM INSANE I WILL FUCKING DO IT. Also fuck you dad. (Babet) I DON'T FUCKING CARE ABOUT THE LORE, GIVE ME MY FUCKING MONEY THENARDIER (Thenardier) Im surrounded by idiots! (Jean Valjean) TIME TO GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE, FUCK EVERYONE WHO WANTS TO SEE MY DOWNFALL.

ONE DAY MORE: (Jean Valjean) Kinda sucks to have to run from the law [yeah homie we noticed that] (Marius & Cosette) OH NO! I'LL BE SEPARATED FROM THE LOVE OF MY LIFE THAT I MET A WEEK AGO. WHAT A GREAT TRAGEDY (Eponine) Marius still doesnt care about me. (Enjolras) He's not complaining, he's having the best time of his life. Good for him. Enjoy it while it lasts, citizen! (Javert) Guess I'll go as a spy with this cool new outfit. [Again, not a complain but important to notice]

OK, THIS DESCENDED INTO MADNESS.

EXPECT ACT 2 SOON :)

[lesmissocials-fuckedup]

Les Mis socials - official 2023 ranking

Here they are - The results of the "Worst post of 2023" competition and overall an archive for the worst posts the Les Mis social media teams have cursed us with this year.

1- "Who should Marius choose ?" - January 29

That one can be crowned "Worst post of the year" by far - The musical seems to once again have misunderstood three of its most important characters, reducing them to being mere love interests and defining Eponine and Cosette's relationship by a rivalry over Marius.

2 - Cosette at Thanksgiving - November 23

The US competitor also took a very strong stand here - not only because it shows a deep misunderstanding of what the character of Cosette fundamentaly stands for, but also because it can be seen as offensive by many. Putting an abused and starved french child in front of a Thanksgiving meal, really ?

3 - Mother's day - March 19

A picture of Madame Thénardier ? For Mother's day instead of Fantine ? It's more likely than you think. Although on this one the team gets extra credit for acknowledging that Madame Thénardier is not a good mother, which shows an unusual level of understanding when it comes to their own musical.

4 - The Wimbledon post - July 15

Also known as That One Post Where Everything Is Wrong - and for sure not their best use of this promotional picture. From the tennis racket to the editing of Cosette's arms to make her look muscular, it is the proof we never needed that there should not, in fact, be a Cosette for every occasion.Not to mention they somehow messed up the colors of the French flag... not a good look for them.

5 - Christmas Eve - December 24

Just a very disappointing post all around as an adequate way to wrap up this year. On the 200th anniversary of Valjean meeting Cosette in the woods, we got a quality pun and an edited picture that we could, at the very best, consider as inappropriate - would it only be because they added snowflakes to a barricade that was build in June.

Honorable mentions for this year go to :

The Fourth of July post - that surprisingly did not make it in top 5. The US team might win the battle for "Most incorrect use of this Cosette picture" with this one - and it is made even worse by the fact they did not post anything for July 14, the national french holiday.

The World cup one - similar to the Wimbledon post in that it just gets everything wrong overall, from the awful pun to putting Cosette in front of an english flag.

Easter Cosette - not surprising, but still extremely disappointing.

Christmas Cosette - in the same way, it is the exact same post as last year and never fails to disappoint.

Any time they felt the need to put sunglasses on Cosette - which, honestly, was a lot.

A very uncanny use of emojis in every single post, that never gets less disturbing.

Overall a very good year to archive their fuck ups - but they still did not manage to beat the record set last year by the Queen's Jubilee post ! Maybe they will do even better in 2024 ?

[mycurrentobsessionis]

I think "On My Own," which is admittedly very sad on its own, is so much more tragic when you realize that the "him" she's singing about isn't really Marius. Instead, Eponine has built up this savior in her head that's going to come save her from her awful life and projected that role onto the first man to show her kindness. Which is even sadder still when you consider what kindness Marius does show her is impersonal and based on the debt he believes he owes her father.

In a way, it feels less like a song about unrequited love and more like a child grieving the loss of her last shred of innocence -- the hope that she would be rescued like in a fairytale. And why shouldn't she maintain this fantasy? After all, she must remember the Christmas eve long ago when Valjean arrived at her family's inn and bought Cosette an expensive doll (one which she and her sister had also longed for), left coins in her shoe (Cosette had held out hope that she too would get a coin, though the Thenardiers never planned to give her one), and spirited her away. Why shouldn't that happen for her too?

[wanderinghedgehog]

Another high school Les Mis. Live reaction:

Oooo they got actors in the aisles. I like that.

Good singing so far.

This Javert seems oddly timid. Like even as a prison guard, he’s not especially scary. He does seems to be rather tall though.

Valjean seems good. I wish they let him sing that one verse from his soliloquy but, alas, it’s cut from the school versions.

This ensemble seems more coordinated than others I’ve seen. That might be because there’s not quite so many of them. This doesn’t seem like a very large cast for a Les Mis production.

Fantine is very sweet and her voice is lovely.

I like that her dress is decently period accurate. They gave her a modesty cloth and everything.

She also doesn’t seem to have a jarringly awful wig like usual.

I think they brought Javert in a little early during Fantine’s arrest. It was a little odd.

There’s some guy in the ensemble with a lovely red waistcoat.

Amazing runaway cart scene. Javert was so embarrassed on “forgive me sir I would dare” that he tried to just leave. He did skip a line though. But I’ll forgive :)

Valjean putting his heart and soul into Who Am I.

Awwwww they gave Champmathieu a friend or something who gave him a hug when he was let go. I like that they didn’t just leave him to stand there.

FANTIIIIIIINE 😭😭😭😭😭😭

HOLY SHIT THE CONFRONTATION WAS AMAZING!!!!! Okay the last fight section was a bit disappointing, but the rest of it was fucking phenomenal. I’m screaming! Javert was such a fucking drama queen too. Fantastic.

Lil’ Cosette :)

I think this Madame T could do to spice up her vocals a little. She sounds a little too pretty maybe. Go nuts, babe!

Red waistcoat guy is back!!!!

This Thenardier couple is kinda all over each other. It’s goofy

Don’t throw the child!!!!!

I love this stage setup. Very versatile.

Living for these background actors.

Eponine should keep Marius’s hat. It’s a good look.

They need to stop making Javert show up from one of the side entrances. It’s awkward staging.

Thernardier gets all obnoxious during “in the absence of a victim…” and Javert just lightly shoved him. I’m dead. You really just have to see it.

This Javert is kinda… doing to much I guess. He just doesn’t show quite enough restraint in my opinion.

Stars was cute. He could’ve done more on the line “and so it must be.” But it was good otherwise.

This Grantaire has stolen my heart. Adorable guy.

I can’t see very clearly, but there’s a pattern on the front of Enjolras’s waistcoat and I thought it was leopard print for a second.

IS THAT FANTINE’S ACTOR AGAIN??????? Or does Cosette just look something like her?

Marius should’ve hopped over the gate. It’s really low anyway.

This Marius is so damn pale. Ghost fella

Eponine pushed three people consecutively. Go girl!

THENARDIERS IN THE FLOOR

This Gavroche is absolutely adorable. I just know I’m gonna go catatonic when he’s killed.

Still no “shoot me now or shoot me later.” I like that line :(

EPONINE NOOO

Bestie Valjean has returned to the plot :)

Damn look at all that smoke.

Javert is back to being oddly timid. I feel kinda bad for him this time. He has such a sad look.

Nice little Drink With Me moment :)

Bring him hooooooooooooooome

AAAAAAAAAA GAVROCHE NOOOOOO

Seriously that kid was fantastic

That’s a nice tablueo

Go in the floor

Really dragging Marius around. Ouch.

two four six oh ooooooooone

Little line fuck up BUT WE FORGIVE AND MOVE ON

That jump was pretty smooth. I approve.

That was a damn good rendition.

Good harmonies in Turning.

Damn. They really put people in those empty chairs at the empty tables and then took them away again.

Cane time for Valjean.

Bishop actor spotted at the wedding.

Saddest onstage punch ever. Sorry Marius.

Is Madame T holding a real little dog? I can’t see very well.

Old man Valjean.

I think that wicker wheelchair he’s in is being loud.

Oh my god they are different actresses. Do they just have the same hairstyle? I might be a little face blind.

Yes! Actors in the aisles!

I think that’s a Javert in the finale!

Final thoughts:

Standout performance was a Gavroche. That child was brilliant so very cute. I hope he keeps doing theater.

All the singing was wonderful.

Things ran very smoothly which is impressive for any high school production.

As always, the show suffers from the amount of lines that are cut. But that’s definitely not the fault of this production.

In some ways, it was too good. Maybe it was just too traditional. I often watch school productions for the weirdness and interesting choices, but they just didn’t really take anything all that far in this production.

I loved that they had an extra bit of stage in front of the orchestra pit. That really gave a set some extra pizzazz.

I called this Javert “cute” too many times. Not sure why. I just thought this actor looked oddly sweet. Not especially intimidating I guess.

Valjean really put his all into this and he gave a fantastic performance. I just need him to get weirder with it.

I’m so sorry to Fantine and Cosette’s actors for thinking they were the same person.

[dolphin1812]

“The supremacy of enchained authority” is such a good way of describing Javert! But his calm remains disturbing.

It’s also awful that this is happening in front of Éponine’s corpse and that Javert vaguely recognizes her. They both share some dog imagery, so they parallel each other in a sense, with Éponine initially defending Marius’ future (by helping him find Cosette and have a romance befitting his imagined status) as Javert defends the social order, but it hurts to be reminded of the fact that she’s been ignored in the chaos of combat. 

Not entirely surprisingly, Jean Valjean doesn’t kill Javert. Between his pacifism and his lack of self-worth, it’s not shocking that he’d let the person best poised to ruin his life go free. Interestingly, Javert snarls “like a tiger,” moving to cat imagery. Cats, wild or not, are typically linked to rebellion in the novel, and Valjean was compared to a tiger at the beginning of the novel when he robbed the bishop. For Javert to be compared to a tiger emphasizes just how much this disturbed him. That he demands to be killed (“You annoy me. Kill me, rather” is a funny way to demand being killed, but it’s disturbing nonetheless) and addresses Valjean formally (vous instead of tu) underscores this as well.

Marius recognizes Javert at the worst possible time, but it’s also a bit funny that he’s thinking of his pistol debt at the barricade of all places.

[breadvidence]

Another day, another adaptation: the 1982 French film, this round. The fact that every adaptation makes at least one lunatic choice really keeps my hyperfixation hyperfixating. Standout points:

This is the dirtiest Les Mis, and I don't mean because there's a nip slip. Streets, clothes, faces, interior walls of buildings: just about everything is dirty at best and caked in filth at worst.

Michel Bouquet's Javert has a parallel with Oyelowo's, which—shockingly—I don't mean as a critique (much): they are depicted as cleaning up their offices with the Paris police, Bouquet very literally (six months into his tenure, he drags his fingers across a painting in his office, streaking through thick dust; eight years later, he repeats the gesture, but this time to remove the barest fleck), and there's a definite career arc subplot for both. In BBC 2018 this is because the narrative thinks Javert is a badass; I'm less clear on what '82 is going for.

Lino Ventura has an interesting, craggy, wrinkly, mobile face, and he utilizes it thoroughly through Valjean's different iterations, from the slack and suffering convict to the dignity of Mayor Madeleine and somewhere in-between as Ultime Fauchelevent.

Award for most bombastic and cheerful Amis ever. The polycule energy is strong. Instead of OFPD, the entire line-up gets the firing squad treatment at once (bewildering and delightful, this sequence includes time pausing for everyone except Grantaire, who grabs a last drink and strolls over to the others, there to take his place for the final shot; someone gimme the fanfic in which he has time-based superpowers, please).

Instead of an intimate moment between her and Marius, Éponine's death includes the Amis standing in a semi-circle around the two of them. Marius proceeds not to grant her dying wish for a kiss. Awkward.

In a change which makes zero sense to me, Valjean survives an additional five years in this adaptation—but this ain't a fix-it fanfic. He severs ties with Cosette utterly the day of her wedding and lives in increasingly filthy solitude (this would not be '82 without filth). For extra pathos, in an irrelevant scene he's depicted collapsing in the street and being robbed. He dies alone, painfully, crying out for Cosette, having suffered a final vision of her and Marius frolicking down a lane (his horrified reaction to this, unlike everything else happening here, is certainly Brick-compliant). Catherine is present and possibly cursed?

Please, the final scene, dwell on it with me. It mirrors the first scene of the film: convicts in chains shuffle bare-footed through mud; one collapses; we see others labor to pull carts full of stone; Javert calls Valjean's name; we see Valjean pulling a cart alone;—in the first scene, Javert then says "You are free", but in the final, "Now you are free". Both are in their old-man wigs and makeup. We have been hit over the head with a point one can certainly derive from the novel, that Valjean's suffering ends only after death (or, in the case of '82, after a little purgatory). But! That it was all Toulon—awful. And that Javert is his final voice of salvation—weird, and AWFUL.

Interesting that '82 is so profoundly grim for Valjean despite clearly, from the Amis, having the capacity for cheerfulness. Not sure what to do with that!

Anyway, my favorite character in this adaptation is Combeferre's beard.

[eta] Forgot: there is the lead-up to the coffin heist and lead-up to Marius lobbing the "les cognes sont là" note into the room during the Gorbeau ambush, but the film does not actually include either of these events—I'd almost wonder if there's a missing scene somewhere for the former, but the latter is simply a dropped thread.

[jelepermets]

The description of the silver reminded me today of something really poignant about M. Myriel. He’s the saintliest man possible, gives away everything to the poor and needy and keeps only silver tableware in terms of luxuries. And yet he was once, essentially, a handsome fop at the beginning of his life who cared only for himself.

It’s just how Hugo paints this large circle of redemption and how redemption does not make the good acts of someone any lesser, in some ways is more compelling than total perfection. M. Myriel redeems himself then in his kindness allows Jean Valjean to be redeemed, who then saves Cosette and Marius and Fantine, all these characters who give kindness to others in return. And it creates this huge web of giving and caring and kindness and it’s kind of awe inspiring really that it all began with one man (if it began with him at all).

[dnickels]

This chapter really got to me-- even the heartwarming moments are devastating, in their own way. Valjean fulling intending to keep a low profile and feel his way through this tricky situation (acquire child, avoid prison) but unable to stop himself from intervening in this awful nightmare playing out in front of him. You KNOW he thinks this is all his fault, and he keeps trying to pour money into the gaping rent in the fabric of La Société at great risk to himself...but he can't buy back all the years of degradation or what its done to anyone involved. It's not even his fault, directly--but he set the rule that ultimately cost Fantine and Cosette everything, and he didn't intervene sooner, and its killer him. Please play with a doll little girl!! Oh my God I'm so sorry please have TEN DOLLIES! PLEASE BE HAPPY ;____;

Meanwhile Cosette is like "this is the best day ever, thank you Hobo Santa"

[syrupsyche]

aw yiss cruise trip with papa

PLEASE

THIS TITLE TOOK ME OUT I NEED TO KNOW MORE LMAO

OKAY SO this was a reference to that gif of Marius hearing Valjean's confession, which is one of my favourite Les Mis memes of all time:

only for me to now realise that it wasn't even "aw yiss"??? its just "aw yeah"??

okay anyways: modern enjolsette siblings AU where Marius wins cruise trip tickets but instead of only bringing his new gf Cosette as a date, he somehow manages to bring her entire family on board. Cue awkward bonding with Enjolras before eventual awkward bonding with Valjean <3 platonic bed-sharing is also a recurring thing in the fic bc it's the highest form of trust and love i know

A little snippet from it:

“Papa, look!” Cosette slipped away from Marius’ side to join her father. “They switched on the surf simulators on the deck! Should we try that later?"

As her father quietly, but lovingly, told her that perhaps he was a bit too old for surfing, Enjolras faced Marius.

“How are you, Marius? I haven't seen you in a while.”

Marius, who couldn't remember a single time Enjolras had initiated a conversation with him, merely replied with a mute nod.

Enjolras didn’t seem fazed; instead, he snuck a look at his father before stepping closer to Marius.

“I really am sorry we have to be here,” he said quietly. “But you know how our father is.”

“It’s fine, really…”

“Cosette told me you were quite upset.”

Marius shrugged weakly. “As you said, nothing can be done.”

Enjolras hummed and for the next few minutes, didn’t say anything as the queue began to move forward. Cosette continued to cling to her father.

“Well,” Enjolras spoke up once more. “There is no better time to get on his good side than now, right?”

Marius tried not to look too aghast.

“Ah er, I'm not too sure…Cosette wanted this trip to just be the two of us y’know, and we were thinking to just…go and explore the ship on our own? Not to say you and your father are bad company! But it's just that we were thinking of— y'know— um—”

“I understand.” Enjolras graciously cut in, sparing Marius from making a bigger fool of himself. His eyes flickered over to his family.

[ueinra]

Time to share this beautiful comic! this is the first part of Rene Giffey's French comic "Jean Valjean et Javert " published in (1949)

The second part is "Gavroche" and the third is "Cosette et Marius" I intend to get them later.

It’s the oldest comic in my collection so far, It's so close to the book and I'm really in love with Giffey's drawing style! I've been wanting to own it for a long time and I'm not going to lie that Fantine is the main reason for that.. I mean seriously just look it her in the cover SHE IS FLAWLESS!!

It’s SO large as you can see..

Due to it’s large size, it contains many frames per page and it’s difficult to read it.. It gives a headache tbh

Like most of Les Misérables adaptations, it begins when Valjean comes to Digne :

And ends when he saves one of the workers and falls into the sea :

LOOK IT THIS HOT PRUNER!

Ok he looks more like a hunter..

Hilarious how Valjean’s beard disappears into one of the frames here.

The whole way Giffey's depicts Valjean's fear and hesitation before entering the courtroom is PERFECT.

PLEASE THEY ARE SOO PRECIOUS I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

The way the soldiers hold her is awful and piss me off.

Yes, Go kick his ass please.

Love these Thénardier silhouettes frames when he loots the dead after the Battle of Waterloo.

AND SURPRISING!!

It has the moment when Valjean breaks into people houses to give them money! I think it's the only adaptation has this moment.

[pilferingapples]

it's very sad and also very funny to have to evaluate Valjean's flaws as a parent because it's like. Well ok . He definitely passed on some communication issues. He wasn't great at navigating the Our Bodies Ourselves part of parenting. But mostly, his real problem, as a dad, is that he was really awful. to. well. to Cosette's dad.

[ofpd]

3 12 25 les mis!

3: NoTP?

if i'd been in the fandom for a decade i might say enjolnine but as it is i've basically never come across it. but ok i'll list a few. i don't like marieposette i think it misunderstands the whole deal w marius/eponine to want it to all work out between the 3 of them. also random ships between les amis rarely do anything for me... courf/jehan is like fine and can be done well but i don't get why it's everywhere. also bahorel/feuilly bothers me so much idk why it's a thing and i can't think of a good reason for it. sorry

12: What's the funniest or craziest AU idea you've ever come up with?

i remember a long time ago joking about an au where les amis organize a blood drive but enjolras can't give blood bc he has gay sex and people are like.... wait you have sex? and grantaire also can't give blood and people are like "bc of the gay sex?" and hes like haha yeah but really he doesn't get play. he's just too anorexic to give blood safely

25: What's your least favourite thing [character] said or did?

um first thing that comes to mind is when marius was like if you leave me i will kill myself. i really enjoy that bit bc it's so awful but it really is so awful... but really one thing that just pains me is when jean valjean isolates himself at the end. nothing bad should ever happen to cosette.

ask game!

[everyonewasabird]

Brickclub 5.8.3 “They Remember the Garden in the Rue Plumet”

I hate this. I’m having trouble even participating in Valjean’s grief that Hugo wants me to feel, because the way this book treats Cosette at this point is so fucking bad it’s all I can focus on. There are absolutely ways of talking about the disparities that happen when one person has a whole life and a person they genuinely love has only them and nothing else; that’s a hard situation, that leads to tensions. But the way the narrative talks about Cosette is as if she makes no observations and has no opinions or thoughts other than how great Marius is. The narrative is absolutely bent her having no negative reaction to anything that’s going on, as if her head is perfectly empty.

Fuck you, Hugo.

Every time we see an actual record of her dialogue it becomes clear that’s not the case, but we’re not getting that this chapter.

I hate it so much.

Marius’s crimes here are at least deliberate on Hugo’s part:

"We have said that we would go to see our garden in the Rue Plumet again. Let's go. We mustn't be ungrateful.”

He’s using that devastatingly loaded word “ungrateful,” manipulating Cosette into going away to the garden and forgetting her father the way his grandfather manipulated him into forgetting his own. “Ungrateful” isn’t a particularly important word for Cosette--yet--but she’s happy to go out with him. It doesn’t occur to her that this is all a ploy to separate her from her father because why the fuck would it, that’s fucking nightmarish, and she’s seventeen or eighteen years old and not automatically looking for ways her new husband is lying to her and isolating her.

Was there, then, some truth in that comparison of the chrysalis which had occurred to Marius? Was Jean Val­jean indeed an obstinate chrysalis, who came to visit his butterfly?

This feels to me like a deliberate, ironic callback to the use of “ungrateful” above. A butterfly’s chrysalis is just like the rotting fish, or the wilted flower, and so on--it’s another one of those items from the convent passage about used up things demanding to be loved as if they were current, threatening their discarder with “ingratitude” for not needing them anymore. Marius has always been incredibly weak to that argument, so it’s pretty rich of him to say Valjean is a used-up thing that shouldn’t presume on old acquaintance.

I do really believe the text knows Marius is being fucking awful here. The problem is, the text knows he’s being shitty to Valjean--I don’t think it has any idea he’s harming Cosette. Which is terrifying: Cosette’s manipulative, underhanded asshole of a husband is trying to perpetuate on her the abuse that was done to him--for exactly the same reasons it was done to him: your father is a brigand! I want you all to myself! I want total control over you!--and all this book can think about is how that impacts her FATHER?

Fuck you, Hugo.

Valjean’s dialogue gets weirder, imitating the things he thinks Cosette wants to hear now: how she should buy herself pretty things because wealth makes everything better (is everybody gonna imitate Gillenormand this chapter?) and extolling the virtues of Marius, because he’s a subject she likes.... it’s bad. I hear the depression talking, obviously, but I wish we got some indication of how fucking weird it is for Cosette to talk to a father who’s trying to phase himself and his own opinions out of his dialogue. And, of course, he talks about the old days with Cosette, because he can only focus on his past with her, he’s cutting himself off from the future.

And then Marius escalates his slow campaign to ice Valjean out of Cosette’s life entirely, sending passive aggressive unwelcome signals through the furniture, talking about eschewing Valjean’s money. Again, Marius refuses to explain anything to Cosette, so she goes to Valjean hoping he’ll actually talk to her. Valjean, of course, upholds Marius’s bullshit and tells her nothing. Meanwhile, he takes the blame for all Marius’s horrible furniture moving, because obviously it’s better that Cosette think her father doesn’t care about her than letting her know that her husband is a fucking manipulative nightmare who’s ending the other most important relationship in her life via some underhanded bullshit with the chairs.

Between the two of them, they gaslight Cosette very effectively... and again, the narrative sees zero problem with that.

Finally, Valjean stays away two days, which is his own bullshit test of Cosette: she doesn’t realize it was two days rather than one, she doesn’t call him father when she inquires instead of the thing he asked to be called, she sends a servant (as is normal and customary) instead of coming herself--therefore it’s over, she doesn’t give a shit and she doesn’t get to have a dad anymore.

If any of this fucking book involved acknowledged that any of what happens in this chapter was shitty to Cosette specifically, I would be on board for it.

It doesn’t, and I’m really fucking not.

[squadron-of-damned]

and while I might've read lesmis as some school assignment, I don't remember a lot but valjean, javert and cosette?

Jean Valjean

First impression: Is this your book? When are you gonna appear?

Impression now: Sir, do I have a potential partner for quality BDSM time that could fix you.

Favorite moment: "Montparnasse, take my money and listen to my rant why you shouldn't be a criminal."

Idea for a story: No ideas before I finish the WIPS for sewereschange and Cosette Chapeau.

Unpopular opinion: All that selfless goodness was actually a vice. There is no virtue without temperance.

Favorite relationship: Canonically, him and Javert are the two sides of the same guy. They gotta be together to be one actual real person.

Favorite headcanon: He had absolutely no idea who the ruler of the France was over the course of the entire story, and he couldn'T care less.

Javert

First impression: This is a furry.

Impression now: Sir, do I have a potential partner for quality BDSM time that could fix you.

(yes, that means each other)

Favorite moment: a tie between "he put on his collar wrong" and "To seize him and devour him, that is to say arrest him."

Idea for a story: No, no, we are finishing sewerexchange fics first, then Cosette Chapeau, then we can make new stories.

Unpopular opinion: There is nothing white nor pretty about this man.

Favorite relationship: Valvert

Favorite headcanon: He could divine tarot and read palms. Accurately, to his great infuriation. It was very much Not Proper Police Way, so he didn't do it. But he could.

Cosette Fauchevelent:

First impression: OK, so here we have a textbook abused child.

Impression now: It is a great disservice to you that you weren't taught how to fight and weren't given a pair of heavy boots to kick some jaws in.

Favorite moment: I don't... really have any? She is such a passive character in a book that she doesn't really get her moment besides staring at Katherine in awe akin to worship.

Idea for a story: Same as above, but also vigilantee Cosette, please.

Unpopular opinion: She wasn't pretty, although Marius thought so. She also was not a good wife material.

Favorite relationship: I want to see some of the friendship she made in the convent. Actually I want more convent chapters. Yes, I am aware we've had a million convent chapters, but (hobbit voice) what about the million-and-first chapter???

Favorite headcanon: She has no idea where babies come from. Or well, she thinks babies are found in dark woods by mysterious men and taken under their wings. (Hard repression of Sargeant-au-Waterloo years.)

[psalm22-6]

I found that Brisbane's The Daily Mail used to hold weekly and monthly essay contests (with two divisions: seniors ages 16-21, and juniors for those under 16.) Books were awarded as prizes. The monthly contest had a theme, and the weekly contests were open-topic. Essays had to be under 750 words. In the first week of April 1926 the senior winner was Ailsa R. Dawson, writing on the subject "My Favourite Character."

My favourite character in fiction is Jean Valjean, the hero of Hugo's "Les Miserables." I have chosen him as my favourite character for several reasons. Jean Valjean is a convict who has been released from imprisonment. He is possessed of extraordinary strength, and his face bears the mark of his long, cruel imprisonment. Shunned as a wild beast by all with whom he comes in contact, his heart is embittered and his feelings towards his fellow-creatures warped and hardened. He is taken in by a godly old priest, who teaches him a little of the Lord's gospel — love. Later, to escape from his persecutor, Jarvis [sic], who dogs his footsteps relentlessly, he disguises himself as a priest. Father Madeline, as Valjean is now called, tries to atone for his life of sin and wretchedness, but Jarvis, finding out who ho really is, has him imprisoned again. Valjean, however, manages to escape, and is officially "dead," drowned, as they thought, in his attempt to get away. He returns to his old parish but again Jarvis finds him out. With the terrible fear of the galleys hanging over him, Valjean flees for safety to Paris, taking with him Cosette, the illegitimate daughter of a woman who has suffered cruelly for her child. After many narrow escapes from capture, he and Cosette find refuge in a convent. At last, when Valjean has his enemy's life in his hands, he lets him go unharmed. Even when spurned by Cosette's husband, he takes it as his lot, and then, at the end, begs only to be laid in a quiet, unnamed grave. My first reason for choosing Jean Valjean is that the story deals with customs and people of the middle ages. For me the middle ages hold a fascination that no other period of history offers. Again, Valjean's character attracts my interest more than any other man or woman I have read of. His life, haunted by the awful fear of capture and imprisonment, without rest from pursuit, never fails to make me cry when I read "Les Miserables." What depths there were in Valjean's character! What love, what pity, and what mercy! Have we anywhere a finer example of "Love thine enemies" than the time when Valjean held his tormentor's life in his hand. What a struggle he must have had between hate and mercy as Jarvis faced him! Never could be revenge more sweet. His life-long enemy and pursuer at his mercy! One instant and forever the shadow of capture would be removed from his path. But love triumphed, and Valjean returned good for evil. I admire Jean Valjean for his intense love for Cosette. He lavished all his starved affection on her, and though, towards the end of his life, she seemed to shun him, his love never wavered. Oh, that more of us loved as Valjean! For these reasons, then, I have chosen Jean Valjean as my favourite character in fiction, but no words can tell how deeply my feelings are stirred when I read that wonderful history of this remarkable man.

In the 70s an Ailsa R. Dawson wrote a book on the Cooloola region in Australia