#v; yeah! a kid who can lift a bus with his bare hands!

[igothxmewcrk-blog]

“Before you ask,  yes  I should be in school. Just the same as you should not be drinking that concealed liquor in public and broad daylight.”

@nodamnstogive  ❤

[lollercakesff]

It’s Sticky

A fic for @fulcrumstardust​ and her slime prompt.  Rated: Explicit Word Count: 5,200

“I just - I don’t understand the pleasure in it,” Cassian’s voice, distinctive but muffled by the thin dorm walls, makes Jyn look up from her coding homework and focus her attention on the conversation filtering through the vent overhead.

Kay, the student who lived next door to her dorm room, had introduced them passively after Cassian had tried to be the good friend and return the drunken man to her room after one too many drinks a few weeks ago. Apologetic, he’d dragged Kay down the hall one more door and cursed when he’d discovered the man had lost his keys.

“Let me,” Jyn states, watching the struggle and trying to disguise her laughter as Cassian swears a string of expletives in Spanish. She ducks back into her room for a moment before returning to the hallway with a sock in hand.

“I don’t think that’ll solve his lost keys problem,” Cassian grumbles, desperately trying to steady Kay against the wall.

“It’s what’s in the sock,” Jyn returns and stuffs her hand inside. When she pulls it back out, Cassian frowns at the bits of metal with confusion.

“Hair pins?" 

Jyn shakes her head. "Lock picks. Move over a bit,” she orders and then begins fiddling with the lock. Cassian’s just about to tell her not to bother when she hears the click of the lock and the door pops open an inch. “Got it.”

“Where’d you - pendejo, por favor,” he grunts and counters the tall man’s tipping weight with his own to keep him from crumbling to the floor.

“I’ll let you get him to bed,” Jyn whispers and Kay chooses that moment to swing his hand between them.

“Cassian Andor - Jyn Erso. She’s chaos. Don’t engage her,” Kay warns and Cassian snorts.

“Yeah well, she might be chaos but she just saved your ass so be less of a dick about it. Thanks - I gotta get him inside - ”

“Yeah. No problem. Night,” Jyn bids and disappears back into her room, ignoring the struggle happening through the wall with a half-smile on her face.

Since that night, she’d tried to keep her ears from popping up whenever she managed to discern his accent through the walls but she was losing the battle. Big time. She wouldn’t admit it out loud, but Cassian was attractive - even when flushed from the drink - and Jyn had kept an eye out for him as the pair moved through the halls and elevators of the dorm ever since. Even though he was good looking, and even though his voice made her insides tighten, she’d tried not to interject herself into their path because the banality of Kay’s conversation was not worth a passing acknowledgement from his friend, no matter how good his gaze felt grazing over her skin.

And she’d felt it, no lie about it. She’d felt it quite a bit.

Tonight though, her coding project just wasn’t working and she was desperate for a distraction. So eavesdropping it was.

“There’s nothing wrong with it,” Kay returns evenly and Cassian snorts.

“It doesn’t feel natural. It’s too… Moist, or something.”

“It’s the most natural thing in the world. I don’t understand why you don’t like it. Is it the texture?”

“No, I mean, it’s soft and weirdly warm - ” Jyn nearly chokes, trying to discern just what they were talking about. Pleasure, moist, warm… her cheeks heated. Surely that’s not - “ - but it’s also slippery. It’s weird - ”

“That’s how it’s supposed to be,” Kay scolds. “How do you not know how to describe it? You’ve touched enough by now - you’re no virgin!" 

Cassian laughs, a deep belly laugh, and Jyn widens her eyes in silent surprise. Were they really talking about this? What was it, a rating game for pussy? If it was, she was pretty sure she did not need to be listening to this. The last thing she needed was to picture Cassian - or worse, Kay - evaluating women’s vaginas.

"But the folds of it. It’s almost ridiculously designed. Like, why have it look like that and feel like that? What’s the point?”

“Because it’s fun. Have you ever watched it up close on camera? People love the way it shines when it’s wet. And if you stick your fingers in it then it starts to get more slick.”

“That’s fucking gross, Kay,” Cassian chuckles. “Look, I get it, but you know other people are wanting to shove other things in it?”

“Now who’s being gross?” Kay grumbles, disappointed.

“I’m sorry, but I don’t feel the desire to touch it like everyone else. It’s messy and if you do it wrong it can get really sticky and that’s just not my thing.”

“Fine. I’ll have to find someone else to compare them with.”

Jyn couldn’t handle it anymore, her whole body flushing with the words. She couldn’t believe they were talking about this - about putting it on camera, no less. And things being sticky. Like, what? She hadn’t pictured Kay the type to disparage women’s bodies - hell, she had assumed he’d never even been with a woman - but here they were talking about how gross they were. And Cassian… though she barely knew him, the idea of it still stung. He’d seemed nice enough but now that she knew he was going to discuss her labia in detail with Kay, suddenly the idea of returning those subtle half-smiles and appraising glances was not as tempting.

Sighing, Jyn turns back to her project and leans her head in her hands, miserable and annoyed with how the evening had turned.

———-

A month passes and Jyn keeps her head down, awkwardly trying to avoid Kay and Cassian whenever she sees them in the building. It’s hard - they seem to be everywhere - but eventually she runs into him and can’t escape during a floor party right before the Reading Week break. 

“Mind if I sit here?” Cassian says, pointing to the vacant seat beside her. Jyn looks around at the others and finds no saviours, shrugging in acquiesce towards him. “Thanks. How’s it going?" 

"Peachy,” Jyn replies and takes a gulp of her drink, cringing as the vodka stings the back of her throat. 

“Same. I haven’t seen you around lately. Were your midterms killer? I near drowned under all of the papers I needed to write.”

“Yeah, that’s it.” He gives her a pointed look and raises his glass to his lips, letting the silence stretch between them. 

She debates getting up, abandoning her prime people-watching spot on the couch, before one of the bros from down the hall stumbles down onto the other side of her, his body knocking into her arm and spilling her drink all down her front.

“Mother fucker,” Jyn groans, pulling the wet fabric from her chest. Beside her, Cassian curses and it’s then she sees that the impact has cascaded to him as well, his blue drink soiling his shirt and pants.

“I concur,” he growls and reaches across her to push the kid away. When the bro looks back to challenge her, Cassian lifts up his finger and wags it sharply, puffing himself up and intimidating the kid with just one look. Within seconds they’re left sitting on the couch in a wet mess of vodka and Kool-aid mix.

“Sorry - I didn’t mean to knock your drink too,” she mumbles, getting to her feet. Cassian follows and tosses his cup towards the trash, sighing.

“Not your fault. Just means I gotta head home early.”

“Can’t Kay get you a new shirt?” She questions and the laughs.

“He’s filming something in his room. There’s no way I’m interrupting that,” he adds. 

“Alright well - I could give you one of my brother’s sweaters. He leaves them here all the time. It would at least get you home?” She offers with a tentative smile. Cassian brightens, his brow rising in surprise.

“That would be great. If you don’t mind,” he says with a grin. Jyn nods and tucks her chin, motioning out of the common area and towards her room.

Minutes later and they’re standing in her small space, Cassian’s eyes scanning the bedroom with a calm interest. She busies herself digging through her closet and pulling out some of Bodhi’s larger sweaters before handing them to Cassian. Next, she turns to her dresser and pulls out one of her old t-shirts, turning back to face him. The move catches him shirtless, her mouth going dry as she takes in his exposed skin, thin torso and lithe muscles. 

“Sorry!” She squeaks, twisting back to face the wall quickly.

“It’s no big deal,” he mumbles as he pulls the fabric over his head. She spares one last glance at his disappearing ‘V’ before she hurries and tears her shirt off to replace it with the new one. In another second she’s unclasping her stained bra and pulling it through the sleeves, tossing it into the laundry hamper near her bed. When she turns back around to face him, she finds Cassian staring at her, his cheeks flushed and his knuckles white as they grasp the fabric in his hands. “Shit, sorry. I didn’t mean to - It’s just - ”

“Nothing I didn’t already see on you,” she manages softly. Their eyes lock and she swallows, the spark from their initial meetings rekindling into a bonfire.

No. Remember what he said! Her brain screams, recalling the overheard conversation and how disgusted he’d been by the women he’d been with.

“Did you maybe, um, want to go get something to eat?” He asks after a drawn out second, hands on his hips. Jyn swallows and clenches her hands together before wrapping her arms around herself.

“I’m not sure that’s the best idea,” she answers. Cassian’s hopeful expression dims and he nods, stepping towards the door.

“Alright. No worries, I get it." 

"It’s just,” she pauses, turning around to look at him as he reaches for the door handle. “I heard you and Kay a few weeks ago and I’m not comfortable being one of the conquests you seem to find so disgusting. And I’m definitely not into the taping thing so…”

“Excuse me, but what?” He nearly chokes on the words, his face paling. “What conversation are you talking about?”

“The one where you were grossed out by women’s genitals. You said they were weird and you guys were having a pretty good laugh over it - ”

“Jyn - I don’t know what you think you heard, but that definitely wasn’t it. I’ve never - not once in my life - discussed sex with Kay. If you haven’t noticed already, he’s a bit tough to have those types of conversations with - ”

“But you said he was filming - ”

“He makes YouTube videos. Slime ones. He makes me test out all of the different types and they’re pretty disgusting - ”

“Slime?” Jyn breaks in, confusion filling her brow. Cassian laughs and pulls out his phone, toggling the screen through search and the apps before he pulls up a video.

The screen fills with Kay in a faux laboratory, the video walking through quick steps on how to make the newest batch before he runs the audience through a variety of displays. She remembers watching a video like this before, on another app, and being engrossed in the way the slime moved and shined like a liquid that somehow existed at the same time as a solid.

“So you guys were talking about slime, not WAP?” Jyn jokes, glancing up at Cassian who somehow manages to turn an even more vibrant shade of red. 

“Yes." 

"Which means you don’t find, er, sex with women gross after all?" 

"Do you think I’d be in here trying to ask you out if I did?” He counters to her nervous laugh. Cassian grins down at her, his eyes sparkling in the low light. 

“Right. That means you’re not weirded out if I do this?” She asks and reaches up on her toes to brush her lips against his. He freezes for a moment, unresponsive, before suddenly he’s reaching his hands out to grab her waist, one hand lifting up to cup her chin.

Jyn groans because she can’t handle his returning enthusiasm, his tongue grazing the seam of her lips and slipping inside. The whole kiss catches her off guard with how good it is, his chest pressing into hers and his teeth nipping gently when she has to break away to gasp for breath.

“And to think I almost kicked you out,” she says against his lips, her breath heaving as his body shakes with laughter in her arms. 

“I can’t believe you thought we were talking about that,” he replies. Jyn shrugs and meets his gaze with her own. 

“I only caught bits of it. The walls are pretty thin, you know. It’s easy to think you’re hearing one thing when you’re not.” 

“Really? So if we - and not saying we need to - but if we got up to anything, your neighbours would probably hear it?” He counters thoughtfully, his thumbs grazing the skin of her hip from where her shirt has ridden up. 

“There’s a pretty good chance Kay would definitely hear,” she states and lets her nails graze through the hair at the nape of his neck. His eyes alight and she thinks she’s definitely never felt a warmth like this spread through her, the burn of want flaring up in her belly. Stars, how was he this attractive? 

“Would you, perhaps one day, want to test that theory?” He whispers, his voice cracking almost like he wasn’t sure he could get away with asking it. Jyn grins like a cheshire cat back at him and raises a brow. 

“Could that one day be now? I’m still not 100% sure I believe that you weren’t talking about women’s bits,” she jokes. Her gaze catches the visible swallow, his adam’s apple bobbing and his fingers tensing against her skin before his thumbs slip into the band of her pants. 

“Well, I’ll just have to prove it to you,” he replies and ducks his head to kiss her once more. 

The kiss is intense, his mouth exploring hers as he guides them across the room until her back is pressed against the wood of the door. She drops a hand to the lock and flicks it closed as Cassian lets a small approving sound escape his throat. In another second he’s reaching for her knee, pulling her leg up to wrap around his hip so he can grind himself against her. The angle is awkward, just missing contact where she wants him most, and so she wraps her arms around his neck and drags him close enough to pin her so that she can lift her other leg and not fall to the floor. 

“Mierda,” he hisses, dropping his hands to her ass to more fully support her. She gasps into his mouth and tangles her fingers in his hair, nipping her way along his chin to his ear and neck. Cursing into her skin, Cassian squeezes her butt and backs away from the door, walking determinedly towards the bed and dropping her onto it. 

Together, they tear the clothes from their bodies in a rush, shirts and pants thrown to the floor until they’re clad only in their underwear. Jyn lay sprawled across her mattress as Cassian stands at the foot of her bed, his gaze appraising. 

“How could I find someone like you unappealing?” He murmurs thoughtfully, pausing as she sits up on her forearms to look at him, naked from the waist up. 

“A lot of guys do. They’re so focused on their own enjoyment that they won’t even bother to give any effort. You wouldn’t be the first - “ 

“Well, I’m not them. May I?” He asks softly, reaching his fingers into the elastic of her underwear. Brows furrowing, Jyn meets his gaze head on. 

“You don’t have to. I mean, I’m clean and everything so if you want, I’d be okay with just a good dicking down,” she counters on a false laugh, knowing perfectly well how college hook-ups were supposed to go. She wouldn’t hold it against him if he was only interested in getting his dick wet - he wouldn’t be the first and he wouldn’t be the last to disappoint her, she was used to it by now. 

“I’m clean too. I wouldn’t be okay with it though - I don’t want to just use you like that. But I won’t force you if you don’t want - “ 

“Oh,” she pauses, confused by his sincerity and the burning look in his eyes. He looked thirsty, like a man finding an oasis in the desert. “I mean, I won’t tell you not to, if you want to, that is. But you don’t have to is what I’m saying.” 

“I’ll be clear then - I want to go down on you. I want to taste you,” he adds and the rasp in his voice makes her believe it more than anything else in this world. She feels herself get even wetter, if that was even possible, as he watches her slow nod of disbelief. Dragging his knuckles along her legs, Jyn helps him discard the underwear before she moves to climb back further on the mattress. He shakes his head and tugs her knees, pulling her to the edge of the bed before settling down before her. “If you want me to stop at any point, just say the word. Don’t be afraid to show me what you like - I’m an honour student. I learn quickly,” he adds and Jyn can’t help the burst of laughter that escapes her at his words. 

“Of course you are,” she manages and she’s about to follow it up with another quip but is cut short by his mouth between her legs, his nose bumping against her clit and his tongue - gods, his tongue - dipping and licking at her folds. She nearly chokes as the feel of it burns through her, her brain shorting out as he moves and experiments with his strokes. 

She never - well, not never - but never this good - has had a man go down on her with such gusto. His attention to detail - the way he returns to the best spot after listening to her moans - and the way he holds her hips to keep her from rolling away from him when it becomes almost too much makes her see stars and she quickly finds herself racing towards the precipice. Her nails dig into his wrists, her knees tightening against his shoulders, as he runs her up one side of the mountain before guiding her slowly back down. When his fingers join his mouth she almost screams, the way he presses against a spot inside her making dots appear in her vision. It feels too good, so insanely good, that she can’t help tipping over the edge and curling into herself as he drags out her orgasm for another drawn minute.

“Fucking hell,” she growls, her throat raw and her body mush as his lips press kisses across her thighs, over her hip bone and across her stomach. 

“Do you still think I find women’s genitals gross?” He asks softly, glancing up towards her with a quirk in his brow. 

“Was all that just to prove me wrong?” She counters, challenging him lowly and keeping her eyes closed as the last jolts of her release roll through her. 

“I said I was going to, didn’t I?” He chuckles. 

Jyn shakes her head and reaches for him, hands grappling at his shoulders and tugging him upwards. He goes slowly, his mouth trailing across her skin and leaving gooseflesh in its wake. It’s almost too slow, she thinks, as he finally reaches her chest and mouths at her breast, the twinge of it flashing hot and sharp between her legs. He was going to kill her with his attention. She was going to die and he was going to ruin every man for her after this. 

Unless… She runs her fingers through his hair as he draws her nipple into his mouth, her fist clenching as he gently bites it then laves it with his tongue. The sensation makes her body hum and she turns the tables on him, pulling his hair and rolling her hips to force him onto his back. It seems to catch him off guard and he looks up at her with wide eyes, his lips turning up in the hint of a dangerous smile. Straddling his waist, Jyn runs her hands over his chest to push him flat onto his back, her head cocking to the side as she evaluates him. 

“Is it my turn now?” She murmurs, nails grazing the hair on his chest and following the trail down to the crux of his hips. 

“Be my guest,” he answers gruffly to her returning smirk. 

Not wanting to delay any further, she snakes her way down his torso, her mouth dragging across his skin until she’s kneeling at the edge of the bed. She makes quick work of releasing his length from his boxers, tossing the fabric to the side and palming him with her hand. His hips buck up into her grip and she gives him a slight squeeze, revelling in the way his breathing skips a beat. 

“This okay?” She asks, running her hand up and down his shaft. Her breath coasts over his skin and he groans, his fingers wrapping around her wrist. 

“I won’t last long if you’re not careful,” he breathes tightly. 

“S’okay. I like the challenge.” He hums his response and she dips her head to take him in her mouth, his frame practically vibrating below her. Small beads of pre-cum spill from his tip and she lets her tongue dart out to grab them, the taste of him causing a thrill to run through her. Was this what he felt only moments ago? No wonder he’d been so enthusiastic - the power and the desire of it was near throwing her brain into overdrive. 

Continuing on her efforts, Jyn moves her mouth and hand in tandem for another few moments, listening for his cues and reacting to the approving little groans and the tightening of his fingers in her hair. Just when she thinks she’s found the best pattern, his hand drops from her hair to his length and he squeezes his fingers around his base, his other hand guiding her face back away from him. 

“Did I - ?” She asks, looking up at him as he clenches his eyes shut. 

“No,” he grunts, breathing deep gulps of air into his lungs. “Too good. I almost came.” 

“Oh,” she whispers, trying to hide her satisfied smile. “I wouldn’t have minded if you - “ 

“Don’t say it. I’m trying not to cum and if you finish that sentence I’m not sure I can hold it together and fuck you like I want to,” he grumbles and Jyn nearly laughs, holding her breath and pulling back and away from him so she can lay beside him as he fights his way back from the edge. 

“Well, how do you usually calm yourself down? Should I talk about Kay? Or the slime? Would that help?” She asks, running her hand across his chest. He shakes his head and releases his cock from his grip, his eyes turning to look over at her. 

“I don’t want to back off that much,” he replies evenly, his breathing still heavy as his gaze flickers over her. She smiles softly then, appreciating the heat in his expression and the tenderness that seems to hide in the crinkles of his eyes. She could get lost in him, if she wasn’t smart about it. 

“Cassian,” she starts, measuring her words as his body slowly relaxes next to her. 

“Yeah?” His voice is gravelly and it sends small bursts of want to her core, her hand slowly drifting back down his belly. 

“Can I fuck you now, or do you want - “ 

“Jesus, Jyn,” he responds and reaches for her, hands desperate as he pulls her to his chest and his lips find hers. The kiss is bruising but she lives for it, giving as good as she gets as she throws a leg over his hips and straddles him once more. She pulls away to reach for her drawer, stretching and trying to focus on grabbing a condom as he sucks her nipple into his mouth. The pressure is thoroughly distracting and when she settles back on her knees she barely has time to reset herself and open the packet before his fingers are circling her clit. It feels too good and she crumples forward, her forehead resting against his chest as he dips a finger inside her. “You’re so wet for me already. I love feeling how turned on you are. It’s nothing like the slime that - “

“I swear to god, Cassian,” she grumbles, laughing and pulling back to catch the grin on his lips. She reclaims his mouth for a kiss and in her distraction he grabs the packet from her fist and tears it open, rolling the rubber down his length in one smooth motion. 

One second she’s sitting atop him, the next she’s swung onto her back, his body trapping her against the bed as he settles between her thighs. She can’t stop kissing him. Won’t. Not as he slides his length against her slit, not as his palm runs up beneath her knee, guiding her open for him. When he presses into her, bit-by-fatally-slow-bit, she finally breaks and cries out, clinging to his shoulders and gasping against his neck. 

“Fuck,” he hisses when he’s finally buried deep within her, his breath panting into her shoulder. “You feel so fucking good.” She nods because forming words is impossible. Instead, she rocks her hips up and feels him stutter and clench his hands, his forehead pressing against hers. “Give me a second, por favor.” She nods because she needs it to, her body slowly adjusting to the size of him within her walls. 

Eventually, he does start to move and Jyn feels herself tumbling, head over heels down into pure lust for him. Her mouth barely leaves his skin and her heart races, desperate to keep up as he begins to thrust earnestly into her. Each collision leaves her breathless, her body on fire as he rests her leg in the crux of his elbow. Sweat prickles at their brows and when he falters, his throat releasing a small sound, Jyn only holds onto him tighter as his pace picks up. She is right there on the edge of her orgasm when he cries out, a guttural sound that has him pushing himself in to his hilt, his arms desperately grasping at her and pulling her close. He cums with his mouth on her throat, one hand in her hair and the other wrapped around her shoulder, holding her to him. 

She’d been so close. 

So fucking close. 

The disappointment starts to flicker to life but is quickly stomped out when his hips jerk and his mouth moves up her neck to her lips, the deep kiss joined by a shift in his body. His hand drops from her shoulder to between their frames, easing its way down until his fingers are sliding against where they’re joined and then working back up to her clit. He circles her once and she keens, exploding back to life as her release comes back into reach. Rotating her hips up, Jyn writhes herself against him, riding what remains of his erection and his hand, desperately seeking the relief he is determined to give her. When she falls apart again it’s with a sharp yelp, the orgasm slamming into her and causing her to clench around his softening length. He slips out just as her body is relaxing back into the bed, boneless and spent, before he flops down next to her. 

Together they lay in exhausted silence, their breaths slowly easing and their flushed, sweaty skin drying in the cool air of the room as they both stare at the ceiling. 

“So,” Jyn says after her heart rate has once again returned to normal. “Was I better than slime? Or is that still your preferred method of getting off?” 

“I’m pretty sure we determined early on in this conversation that slime is not something I’m into,” he chides in return, glancing towards her. She’s just about to make a quip about it when his phone buzzes, his brow raising in challenge. “What do you want to bet that’s Kay right now?” 

“He wouldn’t - what did you tell him?” Jyn asks sharply, sitting up and looking at him with a terrified expression. 

“Nothing! I just asked him to keep an eye out if you were dating anyone. He’s probably texting me to complain about all the noise you just made - “ She slaps his chest and he laughs, grabbing her hand and holding it. “ - And how you ruined his video. I’ll have to get you a copy of the b-roll, just to see how thin these walls actually are.” 

“I don’t - if I was dating anyone? Why would you want him to spy on me?” 

“It wasn’t spying, per se. But if you were happily with some other guy, well, I wasn’t going to make it awkward for you where you live by asking you out. Figured if he did a bit of recon first we could all avoid the situation.” 

“Okay, fair. Get your phone - I want to see our review,” Jyn urges and Cassian laughs, rolling to the edge of the bed and grabbing for his pants. He pulls out his phone and plants his feet on the ground, opening the screen to the message which is indeed from Kay. 

She’s loud and inconsiderate of others. I stand by my earlier assertion that she’s chaos. You really shouldn’t have slept with her - Kay, 10:28pm 

Jyn snorts as she reads the message over his shoulder, resting her chin on his collar.  “Looks like he knew it was you in here, Hot Stuff. Do you have a secret tell that gives you away that maybe I missed?” 

I can hear you. Please try to be more considerate of your neighbours, Jyn Erso - Kay, 10:30pm

“I’m definitely going to get that b-roll footage,” Cassian whispers and turns to look at her, a wide smile on his face. Jyn can’t stop the thought that his smile was the most beautiful thing she’d ever seen, her heart hammering in her chest as he twists to capture her lips once more. When he draws back this time it’s almost reluctant, his fingers grazing her cheek slowly before dropping to his lap. “Can I interest you in some food now? My treat?” 

“Didn’t you already eat?” She counters with a raised brow. Cassian laughs and gets to his feet, pulling her up into his arms. 

“Yeah, but that was soul food. Now I need actual food,” he responds and Jyn nearly misses a step, the goofy smile on her face at his words spreading as she thinks about what he’s said. 

Good sex and a decent guy? She could get used to this. 

[carroteen]

Unluckily Lucky || Pt. 3

Pt. 1 // Pt. 2 // Pt. 3

Summary: Murphy’s Law states that “anything that can go wrong, will go wrong”. As someone who lived under that curse, you learned to have a backup plan or solution prepared for any situation. But nothing could ever have prepared you for meeting Jun.

insp. by 莫非, 這就是愛情 (Murphy’s Law of Love)

After work, I stopped by the toy store the cashier from this morning had suggested, however I was only given an apologetic head shake; I didn’t really expect my visit to be fruitful, but I still went on the off-chance that there may have been one last action figure tucked away in some obscure corner. I leaned against the glass wall of the bus shelter, my phone pressed against my ear, waiting for the bus.

“_________,” my sister’s sigh sounded both exasperated and amused, “It’s okay if you couldn’t get your hands on the toy. You can always get Dohee something else; in a few weeks she’ll have forgotten all about it and moved on to the next shiny thing.”

“I’m just so frustrated because I was SO close to getting it,” I whined, flagging the bus down. I swiped my card and collapsed into the first available seat, “This stupid guy in front of me took the last one just as I got to the store.”

My sister started to reply but her voice was drowned out by loud singing in the background. “Dohee, honey, keep it down please; Mommy’s on the phone.”

I smiled at my niece’s cute antics, “What is she singing this time?”

“The jingle from the action figure commercial,” my sister groaned, “It’s the only thing that comes out every time she opens her mouth…I’m going crazy over here.” There was a pause, “Look, ________, I have to go, but don’t worry about the toy okay? She’ll be happy with anything…and come over for dinner one night, when she isn’t singing that cursed jingle, Dohee’s asking when you can come play.”

“Drop her off at my apartment some time next week. It’s been forever since you guys had a night to yourself; let the spinster sister babysit,” I joked before hanging up. The bus reached my stop, which was conveniently located right in front of my apartment, and I thanked the driver and got off. I greeted the doorman and made a beeline for the elevator, melting against the railing as the doors closed; today had been a pretty eventful day and all I wanted to do was curl up in bed and watch the newest episode of my favorite TV show.

“Are you serious? What is all this?” I kicked at a box in irritation. Once I got off the elevator, I was greeted by a bunch of moving boxes obstructing my way, making it impossible to go inside. “Who just puts their stuff in front of someone else’s place? So inconsiderate…”

I glanced at the slightly ajar door next to mine, barely making out a bunch of similar looking boxes through the crack; my old neighbors had moved out months ago and it looked like the apartment had new tenants. I had come to appreciate having complete silence from one side and hoped that my new neighbors wouldn’t be any trouble, but judging by boxes blatantly blocking my way, maybe my hopes were too high.

I made my way around the boxes in front of my neighbor’s door and just as I lifted my fist to knock, it swung open, revealing a tall, lanky guy; he had a small, v-shaped face and soft, chocolate brown hair that swept across his forehead. I yelped in surprise, simultaneously he jerked back, eyes wide. “Hi. I’m _________,” I lowered my arm and extended my hand out to him, “Your boxes are in front of my door.”

“Oh my gosh, you’re my neighbor!” he exclaimed, quickly grabbing my hand and pumping it twice in a firm handshake, “I’m Minghao. I’m so sorry about all the boxes, the movers just put them down wherever they wanted to…I was hoping to get it all sorted out before you got back.” He released my hand and made a move to go around me, “I’ll go clear them out of your way right now. Sorry again for the trouble!” he said apologetically, looking a little frazzled.

“Hey, Minghao,” I began, watching as he scrambled to move the heavy looking boxes away from my door, feeling a little guilty at thinking him inconsiderate and annoying. “It’s okay, I understand; when I first moved in, my stuff was all over the place too. Do you need any help? It looks like you have a lot to sort through.”

Minghao whirled around, looking surprised, “Oh, no it’s okay! I don’t want to bother you anymore than I have. You’re probably exhausted from work.”

I shook my head, “It’s totally fine, I was just going spend the rest of the night watching TV anyways, at least now I’ll be doing something productive.” I dug through my bag for my keys, “Let me drop my stuff off and change and I’ll come over.”

A few minutes later, I found myself sat on the couch in Minghao’s living room, taking things out of boxes and putting them into designated piles. He was sitting cross-legged on the floor by my feet, digging through a box of his own. Minghao was so easy-going and amiable that soon we were talking and laughing like we had been friends for years; I told him about my awful morning and my job at the dating agency and I found out that he worked as a veterinary assistant and was also part of a b-boy dance crew in his spare time - with a little prodding and pleading from me, he demonstrated some moves.

“You have a lot of action figures,” I observed, as I opened my second box of carefully packaged toys, “Do you collect them?”

Minghao glanced over at the box on my lap, “Oh those aren’t mine, they’re all my roommate’s; he really likes them.”

“Roommate?” I tilted my head, “No wonder there’s so much stuff here. Where is he?”

“He had a meeting today, so he couldn’t call off to help me unpack,” he explained, “His name’s Jun, he should be home soon so you’ll meet him.” He stood up and threw his arms above his head, stretching from side to side, “Hey, it’s already 7, you must be starving; I’ll make you dinner to thank you for all your help.” Holding his hands out, he hoisted me to my feet and led me to the kitchen, which was surprisingly uncluttered.

I sat down at the table and watched as he boiled some water on the stove, “You don’t have to go all out for me, I’m fine with anything.”

“Don’t get your hopes up,” Minghao laughed, “It’s just ramen; we haven’t had a chance to go grocery shopping yet so there's nothing but that." After a while, he turned off the stove and grabbed two bowls from the cupboard. “Here you go,” he placed a steaming bowl in front of me and handed a pair of chopsticks over.

He sat down across from me and we both dug into the noodles in silence, before continuing our conversation. “What does Jun do?” I asked, lifting the bowl to my lips to drink the rest of the soup.

“He works at a consulting firm, so he usually comes back pretty late.”

“So you work with animals and he’s corporate,” I scrunched my eyebrows, “How did two completely different people like you meet?”

Minghao slurped the rest of his noodles before replying, “We’re not so different; we actually met through my dance crew,” he looked up at my widened eyes and nodded, “Yeah, he isn’t a b-boy but he’s really good at stunts and stuff like that. He left to join a local theater group though; he was always super passionate about acting.”

I opened my mouth to respond but suddenly there was a loud knock at the door. “That’s gotta be Jun,” Minghao said, jumping up, “The landlord dropped off our keys while he was at work. I’ll go get the door, can you put the dishes in the sink? Don’t worry about washing them, I’ll get to them later.” He headed for the door and I gathered our bowls and put them in the sink, choosing not to listen to him and wash them myself instead.

As I scrubbed at the bowls, I could hear Minghao fiddling with the locks and opening the door. “Xiao Hao Hao, I’m home!” I heard a new voice sing out.

“Don’t call me that.” Minghao retorted, “And stop clinging to me like you haven’t seen me for years; you saw me just this morning.” I giggled at both the cute nickname and his exasperated tone.

“Who’s shoes are those?”

“Our neighbor __________’s, she’s been helping me unpack since someone couldn’t help.”

“Okay listen, you know I why I couldn’t call out; I should’ve just taken the day off, the meeting was a total bust anyways. Some idiot spilled on my shirt and I didn’t have enough time to change so I had to go to the meeting with a ruined shirt and completely embarrassed myself…” Jun’s voice got closer, “But that’s not even half of what happened today…” I stepped out to introduce myself and he froze when he saw me, his voice trailing off. “What are you doing here?!” he sputtered, his eyes bugging out.

Oh my god it’s the guy from earlier. I thought to myself, completely horrified. “What are you doing here??” I demanded.

“What?” Jun asked, his face a mixture of disgust and bewilderment, “I live here! Are you following me or something?”

My mouth dropped, “No! I live next door!” I spat back, my eyes narrowing, “I was helping Minghao unpack.”

There was a brief pause as Jun and I glared at each other. “Uh,” Minghao piped up, eyeing the two of us, “You already know each other?”

“If you can call it knowing,” Jun scowled, turning to face Minghao with a roll of his eyes, “That’s the idiot who ruined my shirt and basically ruined my meeting.”

“It was an accident! It’s not like I saw you and thought ‘Oh hey, let me just dump my drinks all over this guy!’” I protested, also pivoting to look at Minghao, “He’s the one who bought the last toy this morning and wouldn’t let me have it!”

“Again with the toy!” Jun grumbled, “I got there first!”

“You didn’t have to be so rude about it!”

Minghao watched the two of us bickering back and forth, eyebrows raised in amusement. “Jun, why didn’t you just give her the action figure? It’s for a little kid and besides,” he gestured at the boxes in the living room, “You already have two boxes solely for your toys.”

Jun glared at his friend, his features scrunched in indignation, “Seriously man, you too? It’s mine! I bought it first!” He stalked past us and into the kitchen, “Whatever, I don’t have time for this; I’m starving.”

“I should get going,” I muttered, heading for the front door, Minghao trailing behind me, “Thanks for dinner.”

“Thanks for helping out _________, I owe you one.” he replied, opening the door for me, “I’m sorry about my roommate by the way, he literally has the mentality of a five-year old when it comes to toys. Let me know if you really can’t find another one anywhere and I’ll try to talk to him again.”

I smiled gratefully at Minghao’s kind offer, “Thanks, that’s really nice of you but I doubt he’ll give it up. I’ll see you around though! If you need anything, I’m right next door.” He gave me a cheerful goodbye wave and closed the door behind me.

I walked the five feet to my door and hovered my hand over the knob, banging my head gently against the wood. “Why does the universe hate me? Why did he of all the billions of people in the world have to end up living next door to me?”

After closing the door, Minghao headed back into the kitchen and found Jun hunched over the stove, stirring his ramen with a pair of chopsticks. “So what was that all about?”

Jun glanced over at his friend and turned back to focus on his cooking, “What was what all about?”

“The hysterics; she really got a rise out of you.”

“I wasn’t being hysterical, she was.” Jun turned around, one oven mitted hand holding the pot and began eating directly out of it. “Everything that happened today? Her fault. I was just the victim.” His eyes flickered up to see Minghao staring at him, the corners of his lips twitching. “What?”

“I’ve never seen you get so worked up over someone before,” Minghao mused, cocking his head to one side. “Even with all that happened between you guys. What’s different about her?”

Jun rolled his eyes, brushing past Minghao to sit at the dining table, “You’ve been watching too many dramas.”

[margoshansons]

The Killing Kind (11/?)

Part Eleven: 01. 02. 03. 04 .05. 06. 07. 08. 09.10.

Summary: Peter commits a grave mistake and Y/N finally comes clean about her past in hopes of taking down Mysterio.

Warning: Swearing. Angst. 

Notes: Whooohooo! Things are getting started in here! I’m really stoked for this chapter.

“Let’s go get a drink” Quentin offered, throwing Peter off. His hand wrung the teen’s shoulder, but all Peter could focus on was the battered figure in the yellow dress at the edge of the Ferris wheel. 

“I’ll uh, I’ll catch up with you” Peter offered, and Beck followed his eyes to the figure, smiling as he threw a knowing look at Peter. The teen flew over to the Ferris wheel, tucking the address of the bar into his suit before removing his goggles to take a closer look at Y/N. 

“Please no,” Peter pleaded, lifting up the wrist to feel for a pulse. Her watch face was cracked and while she had a pulse, it was racing at several miles a minute. “Please, don’t be dead, don’t be dead, don’t be dead.”

She was breathing but knocked out cold. Peter cradled her in his arms, eyes not flinching from her scarred face. Blood was cracked and dried against her hairline, leaving an awful pattern across the right side of her face. Guilt and panic twisted in his chest. She had gotten hurt and it was his fault. He should’ve been there. He should’ve stopped her. He should’ve protected her. 

She almost died and it was his fault. 

Her features were set in an unfamiliar expression, something he wasn’t sure he’d ever seen her wear. She looked almost...at peace. Eyebrows free from their perpetual creasing, stress lines disappearing as she remained unconscious. 

“We’ll take her back with us” Agent Hill interrupted his reverie. “Get her cleaned up, and then she’ll  be back in the hotel in no time.”

Peter stood up, gingerly handing over his friend over to the Shield Agent. “Take care of her, please.” His voice broke at the word leaving his lips. All he could do was watch as Hill nodded, placing Y/N in the back of the car before retreating from the scene.

She was all he could think about when he went for that drink with Mysterio, casually sipping on the virgin drink he had ordered. Beck was congratulating him, telling him that they did a good job today. But all Peter could focus on was the fact that he had failed. He had failed to protect the city and he had failed to protect Y/N. 

“What do you want Peter?” was all Beck asked.

That was all it took for the gates of his mind to open.  He had been pushing his wants away for so long, would it be so bad if he took a break every once in a while? Would it really be the end of the world if he just left to Paris and continued with his plan? “I want to go to Paris with the girl I like,” Peter confessed, “And take her to the top of the Eiffel Tower and tell her how I feel. And...give her a kiss!”

Beck sent another playful expression toward the teen.

“Shut up man” Peter shoots back, a wide smile on his face growing at the fantasy. That’s all he wanted. Was it so much to ask for? The chance to be a normal kid? When the girl gives him back the glasses, he can almost hear Y/N scolding him for leaving such an important item around. 

“Are--are those the EDITH glasses?” Beck asked, the same awe filling his voice. “They were just on the floor?” Great. So now Quentin is going to take over the scolding role instead. 

After several attempts of trying on the glasses, Peter turns to Beck, seeing the same wide-eyed wonder in his eyes that Y/N had. The same curious look. He offers them to him. He refuses, but Peter is adamant, determined to tell him that he is the one that deserved to carry out Mr. Stark’s legacy. And somewhere in the back of his mind as Beck tries them on Tony reappears. They look too much alike. The same inquisitive gaze, the same face shape. Beck is Tony alive again, and Peter has already made his choice by the time he takes them off. 

“EDITH grant control over to Quentin Beck.”

****

Her head was pounding. She struggled to push herself up on the couch, grasping her side. 

“Hey, hey, you’re okay” Peter’s soft voice wove itself through her ears and panic filled her chest. 

Y/N cast several looks over her shoulder, hoping to find the drone that was projecting this. Her hand went to her neck, expecting the shock collar to still be there. All that remained was bare skin, the faintest scar tracing her throat. She could still feel the electricity pulsing through her, the convulsions her body underwent. The barrel of the gun pointed directly at…

“Tell me something only you would know” She begged, tears threatening to escape her puffy eyes. 

Peter moved back at the request, surprised at her hostile nature. “Um, okay, uh, your favorite flower is--”

“No” Y/N cut off, voice hoarse. “Something real. Something nobody else knows.”

The two sat there, silence between the pair, as her request hung in the air. Peter didn’t know. Y/N didn’t know. What if this was another illusion? What if her dad wanted to extract information out of her in some awful way?

“The night before I blipped” MJ interjected, making her presence known, “You told me your dad was the only person other than Tony Stark who you looked up to. And then when I came back, I knew five years had passed because you hated him more than anyone else.”

Y/N stood up shakily from the couch, facing her much taller friend before collapsing into her embrace. “You’re real” she whispered painfully, “You’re here.”

“Of course I am” MJ murmured, “I would never leave you alone.”

Y/N turned to the group surrounding her, Ned and Peter staring at the pair of friends. “We need to talk, all of us.”

She grasped Peter’s hand, ignoring whatever look MJ was wearing on her face at the moment, pulling them into an adjacent room. The three of them stood there in silence, watching Y/N for further cues. 

She breathed in and out. Ready to admit to the past. Ready to admit to her fucked-up family and her father’s treachery. MJ took her hand in hers and Y/N smiled at the younger girl. Safety washed over her, and she was filled with newfound confidence.

“Mysterio is lying to you” She admitted, letting out a sigh, “There’s no multiverse, no elemental threat, he’s making the whole thing up.” Peter and Ned froze, looks jumping between MJ and Y/N, their nerves spiking. 

“I know you’re Spiderman Peter,” MJ confirmed deadpan, “Hanging out with Y/N only proved it.”

“I’m not, uh, I’m not Spiderman.” Peter objected, determined to not let anyone else in on the secret. 

“Yeah,” Ned defended, “Peter’s not Spiderman, there’s no way he’s that skilled”

“Oh-kay” Peter murmured, slightly insulted. 

Y/N and MJ shared a doubtful look, amused by their attempts to keep the poorly hidden identity secret. 

“So if you’re not Spiderman, then who webbed this down?” MJ asked, pulling one of Beck’s drones from behind her. 

Y/N dropped her arms, her face widening in shock at the appearance of the small device. “How did you find this?” 

MJ shrugged. 

Y/N snatched the device from her friend, eagerly scanning the drone before finding the button she had been looking for. Pressing it, the hologram sprang to life. The storm elemental appeared, terrorizing the small air in front of them, her father jumping in at the last second to save whatever buildings he was going to destroy. 

A smile crossed her face as an idea began to spiral in her brain, adrenaline pulsing through the girl’s veins, pain forgotten. 

“I have an idea,” She replied, running up the marble stairs, the group narrowly falling behind her. Y/N opened the door to her room, tossing the drone on the bed and reaching for her laptop. She set it up on the hotel desk, plugging it into the wall. 

“Peter, I need EDITH” She commanded, opening several programs needed to achieve what she’s reaching for. 

“Wait” MJ interjected, stuttering, “so like, this, this is real? You guys aren’t joking?”

She began to twirl her hair as the anxious ticks she tried so hard to keep hidden decided to show themselves.

“Like Peter is actually Spiderman? You guys are being serious right now?”

Y/N nodded, trying to soothe the girl while she began to run the programs installed on her computer.

“What are you doing?” MJ asked, brows furrowed in confusion.

Ned moved forward, gazing at the programs she was using in awe. “You’re creating a virus” he announced, catching on. 

Y/N smirked at Ned’s wide-eyed stare. 

“Oh, that’s so cool” He continued. “You’re a genius.”

“Of course I am” Y/N agreed nonchalantly, “Peter, did you not hear me? I need EDITH to help find a weak point.”

Peter remained silent.

“Today Peter” Y/N hooked the drone up via Bluetooth to her computer and began coding around the complex software, looking for a weak spot. “Peter?”

She turned around, facing the reluctant hero, noticing his wringing hands, his nervous stare, his panicked eyes. 

“Where’s EDITH?” She asked, afraid she already knew the answer. 

Peter turned from panicked to apologetic, “I’m so sorry--I didn’t know, I gave it to Mysterio, thinking he was--”

Y/N stood up at the revelation, stalking slowly toward the shorter boy. “You gave it to him? Just like that? Do you have any idea what you’ve done?”

MJ and Ned slinked back at the sight of an angry Y/N, eyes blazing. 

“He didn’t want to have it, and he just saved the city, so I didn’t think--”

“No that's exactly it Peter” Y/N burst, hands curled in fists, “You don't think! And now one of the most dangerous men in the world became ten times more dangerous because you don’t have any common sense!”

Her raised voice surprised even her, her father’s words ringing in her head. 

You’re exactly like me. 

Breath in five. Hold for six. Breath out seven. 

She retreated back to the chair, turning back to the computer. “It’s a good thing I already downloaded EDITH’s software back on the bus.”

The anger faded slowly, but it faded. 

“What do you mean?” Peter asked, his usually calm voice grating and irritating, especially after today’s events. 

Y/N rolled her eyes, “While you were sleeping I used a recording of your voice to access EDITH, it really is quite easily hackable, especially for a Stark industries project. I was able to connect it to my computer, downloading her essential processes before we landed in Prague.”

Ned and MJ stared at her in confusion, unsure why their friend was so interested in downloading the AI.

Y/N shrugged, “What? I like cool software, plus I really wanted my own JARVIS.” She began to code, opening EDITH’s programs, “I was planning on using it to help me encode my own devices so I was untraceable, I even started it with my phone, but I guess this is a better use of my time.” 

The group was speechless as she stood up from the chair, heading to her suitcase underneath her bed. 

“Don’t worry Ned” She continued, grasping the small thumb drive in her hand, “You’re still the guy in the chair.”

She saw the shorter kid sigh in relief. She strode back, plugging the thumb drive into the computer, ready to download the virus onto the device. “I’m just the genius that’s going to save our asses.”

She continued to program while Peter disappeared to the room beside hers, no doubt grasping his suit. He returned with the black suit he wore earlier, and Y/N was getting close to finding the weak spot. 

“What are you doing?” MJ asked, voicing Y/N’s own thoughts. 

Peter began to strip, and Y/N had to resist the urge to look behind her. “I’m headed to Germany,” he admitted, “Someone has to warn Nick Fury and stop Beck before it’s too late.”

MJ turned back around, nodding in agreement. 

“That doesn’t have to be you though” The words escaped her mouth before she could gain any control over them. She heard Peter freeze and turned around, gulping as she tried to ignore the physique of the boy before her. She pushed the fluttering of butterflies down and met his gaze. 

“I can go. He won’t hurt me”

“You don’t know that.” Peter interrupted, pulling his suit over his legs. 

Y/N stood up, moving closer to the teen. “Yes, I do. Have you not figured it out yet?” She asked softly, praying that he would never have to figure it out. Peter swallowed at her intense gaze, his chest heaving up and down as she moved closer. 

“Mysterio is--”

“Hey, Y/N,” MJ interrupted, “What does this mean?”

Y/N moved back to the computer, EDITH’s code alerting them to another watcher. “It’s him. He knows you know”

When she turned back to face Peter, he was gone, the window of her room open.

Thanks for all your comments! I really appreciate them!

MASTERLIST

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[unfortunate-stranger-losers]

All Those Things They Couldn’t Say - A Runaway Baudelaires AU

{ao3} {tumblr} {masterlist}

Chapter Thirty-Nine - Laboheme

They sat in a near-empty room, with only a woman sleeping in the bed against the far wall for company whenever doctors came in and out. They did routine examinations while Violet spat out a fake story about a neighbor being angry that they were climbing in his tree, and how their parents would be along to pay the bill quite soon, don’t worry. Duncan was pretty nervous and uncomfortable most of the time, especially as they had him change into a hospital gown and kept having to touch and mess with his wound. So Isadora held one hand and Violet held another, while Klaus and Sunny sat beside him and rambled on about some book or another to distract him. If there weren’t doctors in, though, and Duncan did not need distracting, then Klaus would pull a book from his bag and read for them, while Sunny waddled around the room trying to get used to walking on her own, Isadora sketched out some poetry ideas, bouncing them off her brother, and Violet played with their last telegram, doodling on the edges or just staring at it.

At one point, the Volunteers Fighting Disease came in, singing to try to cheer them up, and the children were incredibly amused by the fact that they were not at all recognized as “those kids we shared a busride with.” They were so amused that when the Volunteers left, they all burst into laughter, almost doubling over, and not stopping until the next doctor came in. 

When the last doctor left and Duncan was settled in bed, flipping through the newspaper that was provided for him and using Klaus’s pencil to scratch out inconsistencies, Violet leaned over to Isadora and said, “We’ll be back in a few minutes. I saw arrows to the library, it’s a few floors up but not too far. Locks shouldn’t be hard to pick.” 

Isadora bit her lip and bounced her leg. “Are you sure?” 

“We’ll be fine. Just… if anyone comes in, you still have your weapons.” 

Isadora smiled slightly, and then whispered, “I took the dagger that stabbed Duncan and stuck it in my bag. I’m gonna wash it off and use it to cut someone’s hand off.” 

“Great idea.” Violet beamed. “We’ll see you in a few minutes.” 

They made their way to the library of records, and Violet knelt by the locks, narrowing her eyes. “Ugh.” 

“Ugh?” Klaus asked, gently placing Sunny onto the ground. “That’s not a good sound.” 

“Tis not, brother dear.” Violet rolled her eyes, shooting him a look. “These are way more complicated than our ordinary-enough pin-tumbler locks. We shoulda found someone with keys and swiped em.” 

“Do you think you can get in?” 

“It could take some time.” 

Sunny walked over, looked up at the lock, and then said, “Bite.” 

“No, you’re not biting the locks, Sunny-girl.” 

Sunny shook her head, and bit the edge of her finger. “Bite.” 

“I don’t follow.” 

“I think,” Klaus said, sitting by Sunny, his eyes wide, “She’s offering to bite something small to function as a key.” 

“That… may not be a bad idea.” Violet considered. She reached into her bag, muttering, and then pulled out her bag of hairpins. “So first you-” 

“Gotit.” Sunny shrugged, and started biting and twisting the pins, peering into the keyholes as she worked. 

“Cool.” Violet shrugged and stood up, smiling over at Klaus. “Our baby sister’s a free lockpick-maker.” 

“You don’t think she’ll hurt herself?” 

“She’ll be fine.” 

Sunny nodded as she handed Violet a lockpick, and Violet knelt down. Within a few minutes, the door was swinging open. 

“Fuck yeah.” Violet grinned. Klaus lifted Sunny as she shouldered her bag, and she walked inside, flicking on a lightswitch. Ahead of them were rows upon rows of filing cabinets, stretching out as far as the eye could see. 

“Hmm.” Sunny growled in displeasure, narrowing her eyes. “How are we gonna find the file in here?” 

Klaus moved to the first cabinet, and ran his hand over an AA-AC label. “It looks alphabetical. So we should check under ‘Baudelaire.’” 

Violet nodded, and after she tied her hair back and did a quick look-over of the cabinets, she directed them down the rows, until they reached AX-BA. She grabbed the right drawer, huffing to find it was locked, but thankfully this one was much easier to pick. When she got it open, Klaus used his free hand to flip through quickly, but he shook his head once he reached the end. 

“No Baudelaire.” 

“Maybe the next drawer?” 

“No. See, this is ‘Baz.’” Klaus shook his head. 

Violet paused. “Maybe it’s misspelled. B-U-Delaire.” 

“Budelaire.” Sunny giggled. 

“We can check.” Klaus shrugged. 

Violet moved down the cabinets, scanning the B labels, and when she found the BU-CA, she once again picked it open, and Klaus flipped through. 

“No.” he shook his head. 

“Are you sure?” 

“We go from ‘Buccaneer’ to ‘Byers.’ No room for ‘Budelaire.” 

Violet bit her lip. “Let’s check VFD.” 

As they headed down the rows, looking for the V files, Sunny whispered, “Vi? D’nouf?” “What if someone already took the files?” 

“Nobody saw that telegram but the guy at the counter, and you’d think he’d mention if he’d been able to give it to someone else.” Violet whispered, tugging on her ribbon. “Lemony never saw it, and the senders didn’t seem to be going anywhere.” 

“Cep?” “What if someone intercepted it?” 

“We’ll have to hope they didn’t.” Violet said. She glanced back at her sister and said, “This was important to Lemony, so it has to be important to us. I’ll open every filing cabinet in this room if I have to.” 

Sunny nodded, though Klaus bit his lip and glanced at the ground, unsure of how productive this was going to be. 

Violet found two entire drawers labelled VF, and she picked both, before tossing them open. Klaus put Sunny on the ground and flipped through the tops, reading out loud. “VFD- 1485 Columbia Road. VFD- 667 Dark Avenue. VFD- Anwhistle Aquatics. Bats in the Train Station. Building Committee. Curdled- we’ve gotten past ‘b.’” 

“Keep going.” Violet insisted. 

Klaus sighed. “Denouement, Hotel. Doyle, Vincent Francis. Dressing, Lois. Frogg-Drifter, Violetta. Hypnotists in the Office. Items, Museum of. Lachrymose, Ivan. Leeches in the Lake. Lions in the Mountains. Little Snicket Lad-” 

Violet pulled the file out and flipped it open, and then shook her head. “Just the sheet music with some notes. Not seeing anything good.” 

Klaus sighed and moved onto the next drawer. “Medusoid Mycelium. Orion Observatory. Prufrock Prep. SS Prospero. Schism, Discussions of - there’s like three files here.” 

“Hand em over. Might make for interesting reading.” Violet said. Klaus shrugged and handed her the files, and she shoved them into her bag, barely fitting it in. “What else?” 

“A bunch of investigative reports from an E Snicket- do we know one?” 

“Probably a relative of Lemony’s. Here, I’ll shove that in your bag. Keep going.” 

There’s not much else. I see Stain’d-by-the-Sea, Reports of; Sugar Bowl; Surgeons in the Theater; Valorous Farms; Volunteer Feline Detectives; Winnipeg, Duchy of; World is Quiet Here… another World is Quiet Here, and Zombies in the Snow. No Baudelaire.” 

“Or Budelaire?” Sunny giggled, for some reason thinking that was the funniest thing in the world. 

Violet groaned, finishing zipping up Klaus’s bag, and she tugged on her ribbon harder. “There’s gotta be a place. Maybe F for File.” 

“Seriously, Violet? Everything here is a file.” 

“Well, what do you suggest, oh wise one?” 

Sunny gave them incredulous looks. “Snicket.” 

Violet and Klaus gave her a look, and then Klaus slapped his forehead. “Duh.” 

“Come on.” Violet tossed him his bag, and Klaus threw it over his shoulder and then picked up Sunny as they raced back to the S cabinets. She ran her hands over the metal, watching the SW-SZ turn to SS-SV, then SO-SR… 

“Here!” Violet called. She raced to the SN drawer, and then again unlocked it quickly, tossed it open, and stepped back for Klaus to file through. He dropped Sunny, flipped a few files, and then beamed over at her as he found the SNI and triumphantly lifted a file, labelled: SNICKET BAUDELAIRE, ⅔.

“Fuck, yes!” Violet knelt on the ground, bouncing with excitement. Klaus knelt beside her, and Sunny peered over his arm as he flipped it open. 

He narrowed his eyes, a little confused as he started spreading papers. “What are these? I don’t see anything to do with our parents here.” 

Violet looked over, and then narrowed her eyes. Happy she still had her hair tied back, she pointed to a clipped newspaper article. “Read that for me, while I sort through these?” 

“Capture of the Remains of the Inhumane Society.” Klaus read. He skimmed, and then said, “Not much info. Some people who were in a terrorist organization went on the run and were finally caught.” 

“When?” 

“Uh… like thirty years ago.” 

“Date?” 

Klaus told her. 

Violet turned to him. “Open your commonplace book, make a note.” 

He shrugged and nodded, and as he started writing, Violet picked up an article. “Murder! Count and Countess found dead in mysterious circumstances at the Opera- well, alright, we can guess what this is.”

Sunny, not paying much attention, picked up a scrap and waved it in front of Klaus. “Whazzit?” 

“That’s some kind of poem, I think.” Klaus once again skimmed. “About making poison from bird bones.” 

“A profile on ‘Armstrong Feint.’” Violet said. “We have an underline here- base of operations in Clusterous Forest.” 

“Clusterous Forest?” Klaus echoed, and then lifted another paper. “What about this?” 

“What’s it say, dingus?” 

“It’s a transcript of an environmental society meeting about protecting some seaweed forest.” 

“What are you seeing?” 

Klaus scanned and recited interesting things that came to him. “Some are arguing that it’s a marvel of science as it’s landlocked, meaning the seaweed grows outside the ocean. But others are arguing that its existence is dangerous to the local wildlife, as birds will land on the seaweed and get stuck and die of starvation.” 

“Scout!” Sunny called. “Dead birds!” 

“Dead bird skeletons make poison.” Violet said, as Klaus started writing as many notes as he could. “This Armstrong Feint was in the Clusterous Forest, with a lotta dead birds…” she scanned the profile again. “Guess who was in charge of the Inhumane Society?” 

“So the Inhumane Society has poison? What does that have to do with us?” 

“Gimme the poem.” Violet took the paper and scanned it. “Klaus, it’s not about making poison. It’s about making poison darts.” 

Klaus’s eyes widened. “What?” 

“Whazzit?” Sunny asked, more confused than her brother. 

“Gimme the date of that arrest again, quick.” Violet said, shoving the papers back into the file and tying her ribbon around it to keep it closed. 

Klaus gave it to her, nodding; he was thinking the same thing. 

“That’d be when our parents were about sixteen.” Violet said. “And guess what.” She held up the paper she’d grabbed. “That capture was after the opera. Where our parents-” 

“You think-” 

“Lemony was trying to build a case. To frame this society.” Violet said, her eyes sparkling. She tossed the file at Klaus, who quickly flipped open his bag, shoving it inside as tight as he could. “They had poison darts. At least a couple were active during the Opera. If he can blame them-” 

“Then our parents are free.” Klaus breathed. 

They stared at each other a long time, and then Sunny asked, “Laboheme?” “What does this have to do with our parents?” 

Violet and Klaus froze. In their moment of euphoria, they’d forgotten that Sunny had not been told about their parents’ crime. Had not even guessed, as they had, what had probably happened. 

“Um…” Violet began. 

How would they explain that to her? What they’d just pieced together in their heads? How did one tell an infant that Lemony was trying to frame criminals for a murder that their parents committed? 

“Laboheme?” Sunny asked, more insistently. 

“The- the Opera…” Klaus bit his lip, glancing to Violet. “Um… it- it seems that- what happened at the Opera…” 

“Yes,” said a dark, sickeningly sweet voice behind them. “Tell her what happened at the Opera.” 

Violet’s head shot up, and then Klaus’s, his arm instinctively reaching out to grab Sunny and yank her closer to him. They stared up at Esme, who was smiling down at them in a cruel way. 

“Tell your baby sister,” she said, “What your parents have done.” 

Violet took a deep breath, then whipped a knife out of her pocket, and said, “Klaus, Sunny, run.” 

She didn’t have to ask twice. Violet jumped to her feet, throwing the knife at Esme’s chest, but unfortunately Violet giving her siblings forewarning also served to tell Esme something was going to happen, and she managed to leap out of the way. Violet quickly took off after her siblings, digging into her pocket for another knife. 

They raced down a few aisles, before ducking down behind a row of cabinets. “How did she-” Klaus began. 

“Firetruck. We left the firetruck-” 

“But that wouldn’t tell them-” 

“Unless they talked to the counter guy-” 

“Shit.” 

“Okay.” Violet took a breath. “We need to get to Duncan and Isadora and get out of- duck!” 

She pushed Klaus down, just as something flew over their heads. Violet turned to see one of Esme’s shoes, knives replacing the heels, landing against the side of a cabinet and sticking. 

“Oh, I see,” Violet nodded, as she pushed Klaus and Sunny ahead of her, turning to stick her tongue out at Esme as the woman started running after them. “More knives. Guess what, though?” she pushed Klaus and Sunny to the left, then ran to the heel, ripped it out of the cabinet, and said, “I got this now!” 

She pushed Klaus and Sunny down an aisle as Esme raced past, and then whispered, “Think she’s got the door blocked?” 

“I’d assume so.” 

“There’s gotta be a window. We can shimmy out and get Duncan and Isadora. Run to the left, side of the building should be that way.” 

Klaus nodded, and Sunny leaned against him, whimpering slightly. They started running, as Violet stayed behind her siblings, glancing back to see if Esme was behind them. 

After only a moment though, she let out a shout of surprise, as a row of filing cabinets, just beside them, came crashing down. Violet pushed Klaus aside, spotting Esme at the end of the toppled cabinets, and then said, “Alright, Klaus, officially? We’re on an A Flat.” 

He nodded, and took off running. They maneuvered through aisles, hearing more crashing behind them, and Violet waved the stiletto heel in her hands, trying to get used to the weight. “I dunno how accurately I can throw this.” 

“Vi, can we get out of here and then discuss that?” 

“Right, yeah.” 

Sunny shrieked, and Klaus quickly hauled Violet beside him as a filing cabinet fell right where she’d been standing. Violet then said, “Okay, F minor-” “Nobody talk!” -and they pushed on. 

“Come on, dears!” they heard Esme call, and Violet gripped the knife-shoe tighter. “We just want to have some fun!” 

At fun, another aisle started crashing. Klaus whimpered, the noise overstimulating him quite a bit, and Violet put her arm around him and kept pushing them forward. 

“Don’t you want to see Mummy and Daddy again?” 

Violet blinked away tears, and breathed a sigh of relief when she saw a wall up ahead. She raced them forwards and then ran them down until they found a window. Violet opened it, as Klaus threw the Sunnybag onto the ground and started strapping their sister into it. He slid it onto his back, whispered for his sister to hold on, and Violet helped him slide down onto the side of the outer wall. He slid slightly, and Violet turned, watching another row of cabinets start to topple. “She’s getting close.” 

“Then hurry out!” 

She glanced down. There wasn’t room for her to go beside him, and he wouldn’t get down far enough for her to start for quite some time. 

“New plan.” Violet said. 

“What?” 

Violet shrugged her bag off and tossed it out the window. 

“What?” 

“I’ll circle around so Esme doesn’t see where you got out.” 

“Violet-” 

“If I don’t meet you in the Quagmires’ room, run somewhere, get out. I’ll find you, I promise.” 

Before Klaus could argue more, Violet shut the window, and then called, “Klaus, go for the door! I’ll hold her off!” and took off running. 

She didn’t stick around to hear if Klaus yelled at her or if Sunny made a noise of protest, because another row of filing cabinets came tumbling down, and Violet ducked down an aisle, breathing deeply. 

“Well, well, well.” she heard Esme say, a little distantly, “Looks like our little Snicket is all alone.” 

Violet shut her eyes and gripped her jacket with one hand and the knife shoe with the other. 

“Come along, darling. Don’t you want to say goodbye to your mother?” 

Violet shook slightly as she edged her way down the aisle, trying to soften her footsteps. 

“Your Mother’s dying to see you, you know! All three of you!” 

Another row fell down, this one closer to the door. Violet breathed a sigh of relief, knowing that Esme had clearly taken her bait. She backed up a little, trying to keep her head low and her steps quiet. 

And then she felt an arm on her shoulder. 

She screamed and whipped around, swinging the knife heel. She jumped with surprise as she saw that Henchperson of Indeterminate Gender leap back, the heel cutting across their arm. They let out a gasp, and Violet took off running. Fuck, how many of them were there? Fuck, fuck, fuck… 

She kept moving, the files blurring around her, ignoring how close or far the cabinets were toppling, trying to still the beating panic in her heart and not look down at the blood on the knife heel… 

She turned a bend and saw Esme at the end of the aisle, knocking down another row. Violet stepped back, throwing back her arm in preparation to toss the shoe. Esme turned, a flicker of surprise in her eyes. 

Then Violet was grabbed from behind again, and this time the weapon was knocked from her hand. 

“Well, well, well,” Olaf whispered, as Violet screamed and tried to struggle away, “What have we here?” 

[obviouslyelementary]

A High School Life - Chapter 3

Chapter 3 - Friends

Finally!

Roman pushed his way out of the door, leaving his twin alone with himself and rushing out of the house. He pet mister Royalty's head as he ran by him and opened the big porch, getting out of the garden and making his way to the garage where his driver was waiting. He hoped inside the car, smiling at the man and telling him to get him to the bus stop near Logan's house as quickly as possible. He grabbed his phone, sending Logan a message that he would be arriving soon, and looked out of the window, letting the air of the suburban neighborhood fill in his lungs.

It may sound very snob of him, but a few years ago he would never even wonder how it felt to go to school in the school bus. He had always been taken and brought home by their family driver, like the little prep boy he was, but ever since meeting Logan, he gave up on that privilege to go with his friend to school.

He had offered Logan a ride time and time again, but Logan was way too proud to accept it. So as a compromise, Roman began asking his driver to take him to the bus stop, and he would go from Logan's house to the school with him. He still remembered the first time he showed up, and how happy and surprised Logan looked. By now they were way too used with each other, but Roman still liked it better than going to school alone or worst, with his brother.

And sure, he had to wake up earlier so he could be taken to the bus stop and wait with Logan, but he didn't mind the sacrifice to be around his best friend.

"We are here, master Roman" the driver said, and Roman felt that uncomfy feeling in his guts as he reached for his bag.

"Come on Gabe don't... don't call me master it's so weird" he said, smiling and lifting his hand for a high five. The man smiled and responded by slapping his hand on Roman's.

"Of course. Forgive me Roman."

"That's good old Gabe" he said, getting out of the car and waving. Gabe waved back and drove away, just in time for Roman to see Logan walking down the street towards the stop. Roman waved at him excitedly, and Logan looked at him with a small smile. After he approached, Roman didn't stop himself from hugging him tight, even if Logan didn't quite respond it. "Logan!"

"Every time vacations end, you act as if we haven't seen each other in ages. We saw each other on Friday" Logan said as Roman pulled away, giving him a small smile. Roman noticed his cheeks were pink because of the cold weather, making his best friend even cuter than usual.

"Well I just love you a lot you little nerdy boy" he said, grinning wide and checking Logan out. "You are looking dashing with this sweater. Finally I'm starting to rub off on you."

"I am dressing the same as I always do. You are the one that insists I'm more stylish" Logan said, shaking his head and fixing his glasses. He did look adorable though. Fluffy blue sweater, his usual serious black pants, and that little beanie?! Roman was fawning over him.

"Oh honey, you are more stylish" Roman said, and then twirled next to Logan. "But who cares let's talk about me! What do you think? Am I dashingly handsome?"

Logan checked him out for a second. Roman was proud of his look: tight red jeans, his fluffy boots, a nice warm cardigan that went down to his butt and the fluffiest, glittery white scarf wrapped around his neck. He knew he looked stunning, but some compliments wouldn't hurt.

"You look... like your usual winter self."

Oh, he forgot who he was talking to.

"I come here in such a great mood and compliment your attire for you to trash me like a used snotty paper?" Roman asked, dramatically, and Logan rolled his eyes at him.

"You look good Ro. As usual" he said, tilting his head, and Roman sighed, pushing his scarf back dramatically.

"I think that is the best I will hear from you... Fine. Thank you."

Logan gave him a little amused smile and Roman grinned back at him, nudging against his shoulder and looking up when he heard the bus turning the street. When it stopped, they hopped inside and made their way to the end, sitting on their usual places, Logan by the window and Roman by the corridor, and talked.

Both of them were excited for this new semester, both for very different reasons, but still didn't take the grin off their faces. And honestly? Roman loved it.

He wouldn't change Logan's friendship for anything in the world.

 -------------------

 As Patton watched Logan leave towards the bus stop, he smiled sadly to himself, grabbing his car keys and heading to his garage. Sometimes he really missed his friend, but they had fallen apart and he guessed their friendship would never be the same again.

He got inside his car, turned the radio on and drove off towards the opposite side of the bus stop, so Roman wouldn't see his car. He knew Logan didn't want Roman to know they lived next to each other.

Roman was a good kid, and Patton admired him quite a lot, but it was hard to allow him to get closer when Logan was so keen in making sure no one knew they were friends. So he didn't risk becoming Roman's friend.

Patton sighed to himself and drove to school, shaking his head. He was being too dramatic about all of that situation. It was just a high school thing, and he only had sex months left... six months. Oh that hurt. He looked down at his bag for a second and sighed shakily, feeling his eyes beginning to water. God, he wasn't ready to leave high school... but he had to. It was how life worked.

He had to make those six months count.

 ------------------

 "Master Remus?"

Remus looked up from his phone, frowning at his name, and pulled the earbuds out of his ears, sighing loudly.

"What?!"

"We have arrived."

Remus' annoyance flew off the window and he grinned, leaning in and kissing Gabe on the cheek before opening the door and running out. He made his way inside the school grounds, looking around almost desperately until he saw who he was looking for and laughed, running to the two boys sitting by the school entrance, taking.

"D! V!" he called, loudly, and they turned to him, Virgil's eyes widening as Dee's face remained expressionless. Remus giggled and jumped on them, wrapping his arms tightly around them both and kissing them both on the cheek, not caring about Dee's disgusted groan and Virgil's excessive rubbing. "Oh my hell I missed you two! Why do we never hang out during vacation?!"

"I can barely handle you during school, why would you think I would want to have you around during peace and quiet time?" Dee asked, raising an eyebrow, and Virgil sighed quietly.

"Good to see you too Remus."

"So, what are the plans for this year?" he asked, sitting in front of them, ignoring their comments with a malicious grin came to his face. "Blow up the main lab? Make a teacher be expelled? Destroy school property?!"

"Calm down Remus" Dee said, rolling his eyes. "It's just the first day and we have a lot to plan... for now just... keep being yourself."

"Oh! Some free time? Sounds like a dream aeh Virge?" he asked, nudging Virgil, but the younger boy just sighed and shook his head. His head turned when a bunch of noise was made, and Remus and Dee followed his glance to see Patton's car arriving at the parking look. Remus didn't see it, too busy making a disgusted face at it, but Virgil's eyes widened while Dee grew a malicious grin on his face. "Ugh... does he never graduate?"

"It is his last semester before he does" Dee said, tilting his head and turning back to his careless expression as the other two turned around again. "Finally we will see this school without... Patton's influence."

"Thank the hells bellow! I'm so fucking tired of seeing him around with that bright little smile of his!" Remus said, voice filled with disgust, and Virgil just sighed, hugging his own legs tighter. "Perfect little Patton here, wonderful little Patton there... ugh I can't wait for my brother to just shut up about him!"

"Roman still has that unhealthy obsession about Patton? Disgusting" Dee said, shaking his head as Remus agreed. "Clearly I have no idea how you and he are brothers... twins, first of all."

"Me neither. I feel like we are complete opposites" Remus said, crossing his arms and smirking when he saw the school bus stopping in front of the school. "Look... he's gonna come out... I can't believe he is leaving out driver for the dirty school bus just because of Logan..."

"Are you sure they don't like each other?" Virgil asked, softly, watching as the pair walked out of the bus in a heated conversation, and Remus chuckled.

"No idea. All I know is that they are both dumb."

"Well, it doesn't matter. Let's go" Dee said, standing up and being followed by the other two. "We have classes to attend to so... see you guys during lunch break."

"Yeah..." Virgil whispered, the three of them making their way inside as the first bell rang.

[slipscout]

I just had a long ass debate on why Trump is bad

First off, let me set the scene: I’m on the bus with two friends, my brother right next to me. My friend suddenly states about how she likes Trump and that “most of what he does makes sense” and when I asked her to explain, she simply states “those illegal immigrants are taking our jobs and housing, and who’s paying for them? Taxes. We are.” And I lost it.

Those immigrants are more than likely looking for a place to settle with their family. Those immigrants come here illegally because by the time 20 years pass, their kids and family could be dead, sick enough to not be able to move, or something worse(honestly, Mafias anyone?) And then there are the ones who want to sell drugs, but we’ll get to that later.

Anyways, my brother interjected, saying “but what about the war veterans? The homeless people? Why aren’t we doing anything about that?”

You’re right, why aren’t we doing anything about it? Well, we are.

Sort of.

You see, from my standpoint and all the things I’ve seen and done in my life(which happens to be very short compared to others) is that Homeless veterans are shaken with PTSD. That’s v common. But, some of them(and I can’t give a percentage), are too proud to accept help. This happens a lot with people- we think we’ve got it under control but we don’t. Other homeless people just... can’t start up. Others want it to stay that way. Some people try and try and try to get back on their feet, only to have bad credit scores or not know their social security numbers, because hey, you can only carry what you have on your back sometimes, right? Anyways, from a wonderful tumblr post way back a few days ago(please link me if you find it?) an OP said “we don’t help those in need. We help those in danger.” Which is accurate. We don’t help those who are struggling with an unstable job or are sinking slowly into debt, we help those who already lost the fight.

Anyways, my point is: the immigrants are taking jobs(usually min. Wage or trash duty, sadly) because they try. They’re determined. Other homeless vets/others can’t get back on their feet well enough to apply, or they’re too proud or want it to stay homeless. Immigrants go through plenty of slurs and pay money for bad people to take them across the border. They’re desprate. So maybe, if we help everyone, we can get better as a society. Help the homeless with homes, with jobs. Minimum wage goes a long way.

Anyways, he also pointed out that these people are on welfare JUST to get back on their feet.

Alright, imagine this: you’re a single parent with two kids.

If you’re a mother? Whoops, gotta keep up that feminine hygene!

If you’re a father? Lucky you! You get paid just a hair more and your boss seems to like you just a little bit more than everyone else.

You just rented out a shady apartment that looks disgusting, but hey, it’ll do until you can get back to your feet. It’s the summer and there’s no conditioning, so you make sure to freeze some water bottles. Your kids are aged 4 and 7, and you need a babysitter while you work at a min. Job as a cashier at McDonalds(the glory!) You’re on foodstamps too: plus or minus the equivelent of 2,000 for you to spend on food. Your 7 year old is sick from the mold growing in the bathroom, and you desperately try to bleach it away. It works, but you spot roaches under the sink. You can’t call an exterminator. You try over the counter medicine for your 7yo and tell them to stay out of the bathroom as you spray it with raid. You go to work, leaving your kids in the hands of the 16 year old in the complex who just needs a couple of bucks for her prom dress. She’s also the only one who knows cpr in the area. Around 10 am, just as you serve your last customer before the lunch rush starts, your manager pages you. Your four year old is in the hospital. He managed to crawl to the Raid store on the counter. He sprayed the Raid in the bathroom, directly into his face when the babysitter went to grab her phone from the bedroom. The fumes made him lightheaded and he passed out fairly quickly. Your seven year old screamed when he went to use the restroom, which made the sitter call 911(and did the right thing by bringing both of them outside and away from the fumes). Your manager, thankfully, tells you to go, but work overtime(greatfully paid) for the next two days. You barely hear him as you get into your car and screech away.

Your debt for the check up on both your kids, extra shots, medication, the ambulance, and gas? Not fun. You’ve just been set back a couple thousand dollars. You can barely afford your apartment now. Your savings- all of it- went down the drain. You thank the sitter, crying, and leave the hospital with tear stained cheeks. At least your kids were alive. Something worse could have happened.

Your car was hit by an idiot on the way home. Such luck. Lucky it was just a rear end but your back tires are completely messed up. You’ll have to get them replaced. The tow company brings your car to the shop and gives you a lift. The price for it? Not pretty. Your oil also needs changing, and your trunk has a bunch of shards, not safe for the kids(who weren’t hurt at all, not a scratch. Some miracles happen.)

Accidents happen guys, and people who keep trying to get out of welfare make a mistake, slip up, or get injured. The cost of living in America(or in a ‘rich’ country) is high, and eveything is either expensive or overly taxed.

Welfare helps, but sometimes help isn’t enough.

This country is in bad shape. By whom, we don’t know. It could date back to the founding fathers or to Bill Clinton, or to Trump(thanks for the wall, really helped out our debt). Either way, we’ve only exsisted for 200-250 ish years. We need to learn that we’re.. learning. Every government has its ups and downs and everything is probably shitty within its first few centuries. But we just need to work harder. We need to work out the kinks and educate everyone on not hatred, but compassion. Look out fo yourself, but try to help in little ways. Comfort the coworker. Give a meal to the homeless lady down the street. Greet each person as you would your family. Do not greet them based on race, religion, sexuality, etc. We’re all human. We’re one race.

We don’t need a cheeto puff with a caterpillar as hair, or a corrupt woman(seriously please help this election was a joke.)We need someone to work on the big picture by going through the small details(mainly debt. Please.) We don’t need to talk about illegal immigrants as if they’re some sort of pest, we need to fix our drug problem. Up border security? Maybe. Lower the fuckin years it takes to get approved? Fuck yeah. Seriously, 10-20 years is insane to be approved to move into a new country. No one talks about Suan B. Anthony or knows who all of the presidents are. This is why there are so many illegal immigrants- because our approval time is way too fuckin long. We need to teach them every little detail about America that they’ll never use. English is a must, yes, but even broken English and bad adjectives is better than nothing.

Anyways that was my rant

Fuck you Donald Trump

Fuck you Hilary Clinton

Fuck this election

Fuck America- actually no wait pls send help we are doing p shitty here

[igothxmewcrk-blog]

“Pumpkin Bash...  that’s  an  insane  name choice for this year’s Halloween dance. You sure you don’t just wanna go with Liz’s idea?”

❤ for @xspitfirex

[igothxmewcrk-blog]

“Hey...  like...  these unions and protests you like to join...  mind if I tag along?”  MJ was a difficult friend. Perhaps she wouldn’t mind the company, but then again, she seems content with picketing and boycotting atrocities in politics among total strangers who do the same thing.  It wasn’t ‘cause he liked her,  nah.  What would give you that notion?

@callmcmj ❤

[igothxmewcrk-blog]

“I can feel you staring...  judgmentally.”

❤  for @callmcmj

[igothxmewcrk-blog]

“Sorry, ceiling seating's sold out.”

[igothxmewcrk-blog]

“Yeah, so, um, just, study those equations and the chemical compound prefixes, di- is two, tri- is three. And I’ll see you before the first morning bell.”  He had hoped this cheerleader would do just that, instead of blowing off schoolwork to do more cheer practices. Peter swears the ballers pay more attention to his tutoring than anyone else who’s the least enthused with scientific education.

@pcindre liked 🕷️

[igothxmewcrk-blog]

“So am I to consider you my  vigilante  informant  now, or something?”

❤ for @viinewhiip

[igothxmewcrk-blog]

“Glad you opened up a comms channel for us to talk while I assume the both of us besides just me are zipping through the Manhattan air.”  Peter always enjoyed conversing with his mentor, and since proving himself to Tony he’s faced some greater odds than a man in a bird suit. Even some more lackluster silly challengers of the spider’s wit stepped up to the plate and were bested by yours truly. It gave him such pride, such a self-esteem boost, and though it shouldn’t be something he’s always so confident about, as a young’n he needs all the confidence he can get in the superhero biz.

“There’s so much I have to tell you about. Where should I start first?  May let me keep a dog. I had my first homecoming date...  but then I had to bail on her because, well, I’m Spider-Man and,  spoiler alert,  her dad was the  bad guy. And shock-gloves dude, well, he’s the classic story of the one that got away.  What about you?  I heard I missed a proposal.”

@starksfrequentlyassedquestions liked 🕷️

[igothxmewcrk-blog]

🗽 for @callmcmj

“You just barely screamed as we swung through Times Square away from that mad juggernaut douche dressed like a rhinoceros. Please stay that way just a little bit longer while I try and swing you back to Brooklyn.”

[igothxmewcrk-blog]

“Just to let you know, I would’ve hugged you in front of everyone, whether you were crying then or not.”  MJ always presented herself so strong, so independent. Something really had to put up some massive Hulk-like resistance when she wanted it to change or work in favor of herself, for her to be this weak. She’s still so beautiful in her struggles, though. She’s allowed to be sensitive, at least around Peter.

@xspitfirex liked  🕷️