#using this blog has become so exhausting solely bc there's no way to control what gets sent to me

[allamericansbitch]

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[krytus]

I think I might start watching bf5 so can you tell me why I should watch it

bro you’re going to get a giant block of text because hot wheels battle force 5 is a series that is really near and dear to my heart.

ok first off the plot is kinda simple but it’s really fun: it’s a group of six teens that have to drive cars real fast and battle some aliens. the second season gets more complicated but its. fun.

the aliens are called the sark (robots led by a tyrant), and the vandals (tribal dictatorship). there’s never any doubt about them being evil—not only are they conquerors that have destroyed worlds, the vandals practice slavery (which is a minor spoiler) and the sark are led by zemerik who is. just a fucking asshole. however, the show plays with this tradition model of heroes vs villains a lot in s2: zemerik Because Of Reasons ends up on the heroes’s side. this does not mean they trust him. they have to help kallus (the leader of the vandals), too, but they know for a fact the second there isn’t a greater evil to unite against, they’re back to throwing fists. 

there’s another race of aliens called the sentients which are like. gods. they created the universe and all the battle zones—this is the place where our heroes fight/race the bad guys. also ps battlezones are some of the COOLEST concepts we get out of this show. they’re usually unique in design but there are reasons our heroes sometimes revisit them that makes narrative sense. battlezones are unlocked by battlekeys, and getting the battle key is pretty much the premise for every episode in s1, except for a couple near the end that build into the main conflict of s2. anyways, back the sentients. they’re dicks. i don’t trust them. they also have slaves but it’s like. lowkey slavery? it’s. yeah. also, they are 2 kinds of sentients: the blue ones and the red ones. the red ones you THINK are dicks but then u find out the blue ones. weren’t that nice either. so it’s. spicy. sentients also had like. a couple of civil wars.

anyways, let’s talk about our main heroes!

there’s vert wheeler

he’s kind of a dork and you can tell he’s probably like. 18. he’s the leader and he’s kinda arrogant but he always manages to keep his team together. he makes bad jokes sometimes and you can argue he’s a little op but honestly? as skilled as he is he clearly needs a team at his back. i stan him so hard. he drives the saber which is a car with a chainsaw on it. a chainsaw.

vert’s second is command is agura ibaden, this beautiful lady:

she made me into a lesbian. she doubts herself sometimes and gets a couple of episodes about learning to be in control and eventually she’s a great leader in her own right. she drives the tangler which is a beast of a vehicle and she’s good at planning and hitting the enemy in ways they don’t expect. i love her so much.

next up we have the cortez brothers, spinner and sherman.

they’re latino but it’s implied they’re mexican because spinner’s gamer name references a specific city in mexico. also, side note, bf5 was ridiculously popular in mexico. like. reruns every other hour. it was the life. but anyways, they’re the technical brains of the team. spinner is good with computers and sherman is an engineering genius. although they’re both the tech support, i love that they have different skills!! they love each other very much but they also get on each other’s nerves. in one episode they dare each other to eat increasingly gross things it’s hilarious and they’re peak sibling culture. also sherman is big and still the brains! there are however a couple food jokes about him which is :( but they’re not like. his entire characterization! he’s complex and i love him. they drive the buster which is. basically a tank. 

anyways, next up is zoom takazumi, resident ninja

alkjd actually he’s a mixed martial arts fighter! he’s the youngest and i would protect him with my LIFE. also i don’t have the episode on hand right this moment but he’s south asian! yay diversity. he gets flak for being the baby of the team but he really finds himself and he’s an awesome scout. also i love alessandro juliani, his VA so. stan him. he drives the chopper which is a bike that becomes a helicopter. i don’t make it sound very cool but it IS.

we also have stanford isaac rhodes 

he’s our moron representation. he’s vain, self obsessed, and thinks he should be in charge (the villains literally. know him as “the vain one” it’s hilarious). if the writing for this show were weaker, i’d hate him. however! he learns to not be such a dick. he becomes ride or die for his friends. as much as he thinks he should be in charge and clashes with agura, he learns to be better! i appreciate this dumbass white boy. he drives the reverb which has guns. a car. with sonic guns. this show goes ridiculously hard.

in s2 we get two more characters, tezz and aj. 

tezz volitov is like stanford, but ridiculously smart. he strands himself on an alien mood at the age of NINE, and spends the next 9 years alone. it’s kinda sad. it takes him a while, but he eventually learns how to be a good teammate and i love him so much. he’s also russian, i think, but he’s. probably not white? it’s complicated. this is an issue i got with the show but i’ll tack it onto them wanting to be diverse whilst being white people. tezz drives the splitwire which i. legit want. it’s so fucking COOL.

finally, we have aj who i dont have a gif for, i just realized. he’s white n blonde, tho so. just imagine that. he doesn’t have too big of a role in the series, but he’s vert’s friend so i trust him and also the times he does show up he doesn’t steal the spotlight or anything, which i respect. they knew he was a bland white guy and they committed to that.

but yeah the characters are really interesting. also, the animation? is god tier for a show from 2010 that had the graveyard time slot. there are so many little details and the SCORING IS TO DIE FOR, also the way they color skin tones? is something you rarely see in 3D cartoons. they understood that dark skin in different lighting doesn’t react the same as white skin. there is no moment in the show where you can’t see the difference in the skin tone of the characters. it’s amazing and i love it so much.

a couple of details from the animation bc i love it

but yeah! this show is very colorful and what i call “lovingly animated”

another great things about it are. the jokes. the way they write dialogue is literally. to die for:

“bro, what would you do without me?” “live to see my next birthday”

“who wants to help me destroy a pack of killer robots?”

“a great warrior has fallen. an ally, an enemy, but, mostly a dismal failure, and a loser”

“believe it or not, i’m too exhausted to humiliate you”

“you’re risking our lives based on artwork made of STICK FIGURES?”

“if a 50ft statue of one of us showed up in a battlezone, what would we do?” “i’d blog about it” “no one reads your blog”

“the brains of this operation?” “he’s the left hemisphere. i’m the right”

some of them have visual elements which i love in jokes!!

but yeah. this is long enough i guess.

to sum up:

diverse cast

great animation

great music

solid plot

solid writing

funny joaks

some AMAZING foreshadowing 

the webisodes are funny and cute

the theme song SLAPS

WORDBUILDING TO DIE FOR

there’s so much i’m leaving out because this show is SO MUCH AND SO GOOD but yeah. i made some gifs if you want to see the flavor of this show

there’s no romance like. at all. the focus is solely on the action and i love it

however, i am known for being a salty little bitch so issues™

could have used more women

there are a couple of jokes which are kinda cheesy

the diversity is the kind written by white people so take that as you will. also it’s a show that’s like. as good as white people can write. nothing super revolutionary.

it doesn’t entirely have. a solid ending. it has a tv movie that wraps it up but 1. it’s in spanish (yours truly wrote a translation) 2. it includes a cliffhanger which was. unnecessary. it’s more that they wanted to leave the door open for more but. didn’t make it. however! all the main conflicts get resolved so it’s not too a big issue

there’s probably more stuff but honestly? it’s a solid kids show. flaws n strengths. i love it

[ctrl-shift-esc]

“So, it’s not gonna be easy. It’s going to be really hard; we’re gonna have to work at this everyday, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, forever, everyday. You and me… everyday.” ― Nicholas Sparks, The Notebook

All Aboard RelationSHIPS

The Art of Combining my Life with Yours

Hello, 

It’s Friday the 13th, I’m writing to you from a quaint coffee shop here in Gastown , Vancouver, BC.

It’s taken me a while to finally get to write this thing. (what’s new) 

But here we are…

So as per the results of my Instagram poll, this will be a conversation about what I believe it takes to be in a committed relationship. 

So often nowadays I hear of couples who once adored each other, who once talked about spending the rest of their lives together, break up for no apparent reason. Myself included.

No one’s cheated, no one’s physically hurt the other, no ones ultimately betrayed the other. So why are these relationships ending? Why is it that two people who once adored one another, suddenly decide that they’re no longer right for each other? Why are people, who say they eventually dream of getting married, end up giving up on their partner? I’m hearing reasons like; I just fell out of love. They just weren’t right for me. My heart just wasn’t in it anymore. They weren’t enough of this or too much of that… 

Here’s what I think:

We are quick to blame. We are quick to quit. We are quick to judge. We are quick to start looking for something better when we suddenly aren’t getting everything we want. We always want better. Though, perfect does not exist. I’m (now) a true believer in; “The grass is not greener on the other side, It’s greener where you WATER it.”

DISCLAIMER:

-These are only theories - based on my own experiences.

-These are not by any mean factual. They are merely perceptual. (as is anything in this world)

-I understand your experience might be very different than mine, which does not make your way of loving or living any less right.

-I will be talking about what it means to take responsibility for your choices and how you show up - this does not mean; to go ahead and blame yourself for circumstances that are clearly out of your control. Please remember that.

so without further a-do 

lets get crackin’!

First, take a moment to ask yourself what it means to you to be in a committed relationship? What does it mean to be in love? What does it mean to love someone? What does it mean to break up? What are your reasons to get out of a relationship? What are your reasons for not getting into a relationship in the first place? What do you ultimately want for yourself and your love life?

And now, are your choices reflecting the values you’ve set for yourself?

My definition of love and definition of a committed relationship has evolved in the past couple of years, in ways I truly never thought it would. I’ve dated my fair share of different individuals - choosing them solely based on how they made me feel. Based on how much giddiness they created for me. Blindly hoping, that this time, it would work out. Choosing them based on all the wrong reasons, based on all the wrong values. That being said, it didn’t mean I fell any less in love with them. Even if I was somehow picking the wrong people. I was madly in love every time. Or should I say; I was madly in lust. Either way, needless to say, these clearly never lasted. Except for my very first love, which was a bumpy ride of a relationship, & lasted for more than 3 years. 

Why do I think they never lasted? Truthfully, partly because I didn’t know how to take responsibility for my own actions. Also, I didn’t have the emotional language I have today to have been able to express myself properly. I was a bundle of emotions with no direction, no guidance. I don’t blame my ex-lovers for not being able to stick around, how were they supposed to know how to deal with me, when I didn’t even know how to deal with myself?

You can’t hold someone else accountable for the outcome of your relationship if you can’t hold yourself accountable for your own actions. 

This is a touchy subject, because all of what I’m saying is purely based on my experiences. Where you’re at in your journey and what you’ve determined you need right now, may not resemble me at all. And that’s ok. For now, for the sake of reading a blog, hear me out & let’s go for a ride.

First; I’d say in a “relationship”, but I’ll say “Friendship” ( because any couple should ultimately be great friends to begin with) there needs to be a mutual decision to be committed to one another. I’m not talking puppy love commitment . I’m not talking, “let’s be bf/gf until we’re not anymore” - - commitment. Not the - “I won’t cheat on you because I’m not technically allowed to, since I’ve called you my bf/gf already” commitment. I’m talking about the ; I consciously & consistently choose you. I choose you to be my teammate. I choose you to be my partner. I choose you to be my best friend. I’ve decided I won’t give up on you - that kind of  “committed to one another”. The commitment that goes beyond the initial attraction. The commitment that meets the other persons soul. The commitment that meets the other person half way, because they also choose you wholeheartedly.

Also you need to know, you have your own work to do in a relationship and your partner has theirs. You are, ultimately, 2 different entities. You can take responsibility for your half of the equation (and I’ll get into, how , in just a moment) but you absolutely cannot take all of it. 

You need to be vulnerable, not for your partner, but for yourself. Which means you identify when and why you feel what you’re feeling. 

Second; you have to have the will to make ends meet. Both of you. The will to work on your faults. The will to work together as a team to find solutions when you’re no longer calibrated, because kid you not, it will happen. If there’s no will there’s no way. 

You need to be honest, with your partner and yourself. Once you’ve identified what is going on, you voice it to your partner.

Then comes the compromise, the solution finding, and trial and error. 

This type of communication is not easy. 

NOT EASY. 

I think people nowadays underestimate what “Not Easy” means. It means it’s HARD. It’s uncomfortable. It means it’s not fun; it’s long, tedious, exhausting. Sometimes it feels hopeless. However, “Not Easy” does not mean, “Not Worth It”. 

I used to choose my men based on all the wrong reasons, to the point one day, I decided to have a checklist. I figured this was the perfect way of not dealing with bullshit. I believed this was exactly how I was going to pick the right person. The person that would be exactly what I wanted. Surely if they’re exactly what I want then it would last forever. 

Well that guy came along and it didn’t even last to the 4th month. So clearly lists and strict relationship diets are not 100% effective. I wanted someone that seemed like a “Fuck Yes” a no brainer - but easy turned out to be the hardest relationship I’ve had to this date, in the sense that it destroyed me. 

I then decided, I no longer had rules. I said yes to what ever the universe sent my way (get your head out of the gutter, not talking sex things)….. I said yes to meeting new people, people I would’ve otherwise never spoken to. I said yes to trips I would’ve otherwise not agreed to. 

During that time I said yes to someone who I’d been friends with for longer than I could remember. I said yes despite knowing it would not be an easy relationship if it were to ever turn into one. But I said yes. Because fundamentally we communicated properly, we knew who we were as individuals. There was definitely a sexual attraction there, we laughed, we enjoyed each other. I said yes to someone I otherwise wouldn’t have, and it was the best choice I ever made. It’s been wonderful and life changing. Anything but easy. I would be lying if I said there hasn’t been times where I wondered if it wouldn’t be easier to give up. 

Yes, it would be easier……. Somewhat.

Would it be worth it? To give up?

No.

Never. 

What has kept me holding on? Other than the fact, that I’m not only IN LOVE with him, but I simply love who he is as a human being.

Well! I want to get married one day. Which means I have already made the decision that I ultimately want to share my life with 1 person. I also know, no one is perfect. So then how am I supposed to justify wanting to be committed to one person if I run away when things get a little rocky?

If I give up, it means I was never fully committed in the first place. Which means I can’t expect anyone to be committed to me either.

Also, I find practicing at becoming a better human; growing intellectually, emotionally, and together, far more gratifying than having to start all over again every time. Any relationship will take work, will take calibration, due to the simple fact that 2 different human beings can’t always be on the same wave length. Shit just gets rocky sometimes. That’s fact. With anyone. So why would I want to drop all the hard work, for a temporary way out, just to start all over again with someone else down the road?! 

This will never be worth it to me. 

But yes, I have a limit. IF I’m finding the strength to communicate, to put the work in, I’m willing to try , try again……and try again. But if I’m asking for what I need and my needs can’t… not can’t but simply won’t be met, and the work isn’t reciprocated… Then there comes a time where I can’t do all the work myself. This could cause me to let go. IF I am betrayed, I’m talking, cheated on or hurt to the point of no return… I’ll let go. 

They’re called relationSHIPS for a reason, it isn’t always smooth sailing. There’s going to be waves and some rockier than others. Love takes work. It’s not just about a feeling. It’s either you’re on board or you can take your life raft back to shore. 

No do not stay in something that is toxic. Do not take responsibility for something that is out of your control either. If your partner lacks commitment, that is not a You problem. If you showed up 100% for yourself and your partner and tried your best at all times then that’s all you can do. However, If the relationship didn’t cause any real harm to you, & you haven’t fully given it a chance, you bail, know that this was your choice. Take full responsibility. It wasn’t because that person wasn’t right for you, It’s simply because you chose to decide she wasn’t. If you haven’t taken the time to ask for what you needed, If you didn’t give the person the chance to give that to you - If you blamed falling out of love as though this was out of your control, know that you did not commit to the relationship. This isn’t right or wrong, it is what it is, but take responsibility for it. I believe; If you’ve fallen for them before, you can fall for them again, question is, do you want to?

I’ll let you ponder…

on that note 

Ctrl+ Shift+ Live Love Laugh wholeheartedly (Btw, a little quality time goes a long way.) <3 .