#url is explained on my blog description :)

[elegyofthemoon]

alsdjkfakljsh i feel like this is warranted but hey!!! selfshippers who are following this blog!!! my sideblog for selfshipping is the one that starts with "ei" !!! this one's just a main for multifandoms (dm if you're still confused)

[binjiong]

suyuwubi -> binjiong

[charlottesbookclub]

time after time – chapter one (armitage hux x reader)

time after time masterlist

Summary: Much to the general's displeasure, Mitaka has arranged for Hux to meet with a captain who has recently transferred to the Finalizer. The meeting does not go particularly well.

Warnings/Tags: gn!reader; set pre-TFA; description of a medical appointment; medical anxiety; description of an injection; description of fainting as a result of an injection; Hux is quite rude lol, but hey he has to start somewhere, right?; as always, let me know if I've missed anything!

Words: 2752

Author’s Note: hell yeah chapter one babeyyyy!! I'm so excited for y'all to finally start reading this story! I definitely wanted to start Hux from a place where he was very much closed off to others, so that's why we get him being quite rude at this initial point. for me at least, it makes it even more fun to watch the trajectory of both the relationship and him as a character ☺️ I also want to give huge credit to a blog that used to go by armitages-galaxy for their incredible headcanons about Hux hating medical which have lived rent free in my head since I read them (if the person who ran that blog has a new url you'd like me to tag, please let me know!). I hope you enjoy the first chapter! 🥰

Hux’s datapad pinged. It was a message from Mitaka.

Don’t forget about your “exploratory interpersonal reconnaissance mission!" 😉

Hux scowled and snatched the datapad off the desk, furiously tapping out his reply. Ever since he had expressed his emphatic disinterest in using the word “date” for this forced meet-up, Mitaka had been creating ever more obscure and complex names to refer to it.

I never forget anything. Even meetings I do not wish to attend.

He cast the datapad back on the desk, running his hands over his face, pressing his palms against his closed eyes. How could he have let Mitaka talk him into this? Another ping.

Please try not to be so… Mitaka unsent the message, but not before the notification popped onto Hux’s screen. Another rush of frustration ran through Hux before something else took over. What was the last word in that sentence? Hux shifted in his seat, suddenly noticing an odd feeling in his stomach. Then Mitaka messaged again:

Please just try! I think you’ll actually really like the captain if you would just give it a chance

Hux huffed a sigh. This captain he was meant to be meeting was some academy friend of Mitaka’s older sister, recently transferred to the Finalizer from field work. Something about doing recruitment planetside. Hux hadn’t really been listening when Mitaka had explained it, which had been the vital mistake that had led to this whole mess. Somewhere along the line Mitaka had mentioned that the two of you would get on well, and Hux unknowingly made a noise of assent in response to the suggestion of a potential first meeting. He had just been trying to show the lieutenant that he had been listening – which, of course, he hadn’t been, although that was hardly his fault. He was far too busy preparing the plans for Starkiller to entertain the inane comments from his personal staff that he might benefit from someone in his life aside from his work. Hux scoffed at the memory. What idiocy. Someone else would only distract him from the many tasks at hand. But if it would get his staff to be silent on the topic for a while, he supposed he could at least show up.

I will be there. I have to be at medical first, but I will attend the meeting.

Hux sent the message back to Mitaka and checked the time. Kriff – he should already be on his way to the med bay. He combed his fingers quickly through his hair in the mirror, ensuring it met his standards for professional perfection. Another message pinged in.

KRIFF, Hux! Of course you’re doing medical too! You get one day off and you have to fill every second – I can’t believe I’m surprised 🙄

Hux just snorted and clicked the datapad off as he swept out of his quarters. It was true – he barely had time to sleep while operating under his normal schedule, so spending even half an hour in medical was out of the question. But what Mitaka didn’t know was that he put off these appointments as long as possible because he didn’t… he didn’t like it in medical. He couldn’t quite find the words for it – he knew no one particularly enjoyed spending time in the med bay, but there was just something about it that made him feel almost queasy. He had to take his uniform off. The medics touched his skin. They asked him lots of questions. He lied when necessary. They prescribed him new doses of his medications – stims mostly, for when he worked two or three cycles on no sleep. They gave him his required injections and he left. He was shaky for the rest of the day. Even the thought of it caused a little shudder to pass through him, but he tried to force it down. He straightened his shoulders and walked even more briskly through the halls. He had to survive this, then it was just a few hours until that cursed meet up with the captain, and then he would finally be free to continue the work he had been doing on some experimental designs. 

He steeled himself as his credentials unlocked the door and he stepped into the med bay. To the extent he was able, Hux tried to turn himself off to all exterior feeling as the medics completed their examination. Perhaps the meeting with the captain was a good idea after all, he mused, since his feelings of annoyance toward the impending appointment kept his mind occupied during most of the visit. It wasn’t until he was receiving his required injections that he let his concentration slip. The alcohol prep pad was suddenly very cold against his flushed skin, drawing his attention immediately. He felt the tiny prick of the needle, then everything got a little blurry around the edges.

Hux regained his senses laying on his back on the cot in the examination room. He looked up at the dark ceilings that were more brightly lit than elsewhere in the ship to better illuminate the medics’ work. He blinked a few times, struggling to regulate his breathing. The loss of control made him sick to his stomach, and he could feel sweat beading on his forehead. Then the faces of two medics came into focus over him, their expressions concerned.

 “General, are you alright?” One of them asked.

“Yes, yes, I’m just fine.” Hux forced himself to sit up, even if his vision got a little shaky as he did so.

“Sir, please. No need to get up so quickly. You should rest a moment longer,” the other suggested, her hands reaching out to guide him back onto the cot, but he brushed her away.

“Nonsense,” he retorted, though he knew she was right. “I have duties to attend to.” He pushed himself up to a standing position, careful to hide the way he swayed slightly on his feet. Collecting the rest of his uniform, he turned back to the medics who were still watching him with worried faces.

“Not a breath of this leaves this room,” he ordered, leveling his gaze meaningfully at one then the other, attempting to make sure they felt the weight of his authority even if his state of partial undress and his unseemly faint were making him feel rather less like a general and rather more like a small child.

“Yes, sir – of course, sir!” they both hurried to respond. Satisfied, he ended the interaction with a curt nod. Once the door slid shut and he was alone in the adjoining private waiting room, he allowed himself one long deep breath and a slight lean against the wall until his knees stopped feeling so weak. Then he donned the rest of his uniform and straightened his posture, determined to bury this moment of weakness.

The intervening hours between his appointment at medical and his meeting with the captain were long and unproductive. He alternated between anger at himself for his lapse in composure and frustration at the event that loomed before him. Both emotions pulled him from his work, leaving him sitting at his desk looking absently out the windows into space, his boot tapping the polished floor rhythmically. He debated at length with himself whether he should just cancel, but decided that one display of weakness was far more than enough for one cycle. He would meet the captain, exchange a few words, then say he needed to return to his work and do just that. Set in his intentions, he swept out of his quarters again at the time he had set for himself – it would allow him to be precisely a minute and a half early – and made his way to the officers’ dining hall.

Despite the squared set of his shoulders and the comforting weight of his greatcoat draped around him, he noticed his steps falter just slightly as he walked through the doors. He rarely ate in the dining hall, preferring to swallow a few bites of a nutrition bar in his office between commitments. There was no need to turn the consumption of one’s required nutrients into an event. He saw a few of the officers look up, back to their trays, and up again upon realizing they had seen General Hux in the dining hall. He ignored their glances, using most of his concentration to search faces for that of the captain. He had looked up your personnel file of course, and he had a sense of what you looked like from your official identification image. His eyes swept back and forth across the tables until he noticed you sitting in a booth near the back. Instinctively, he moved to pass a gloved hand through his hair to ensure all the strands were perfectly at attention, only to realize his hand was shaking slightly. Scowling, he stalked toward your table.

You hadn’t noticed his approach yet, which allowed him a cursory inspection of you. He immediately wished he wouldn’t have looked. You looked… nice – good. No, professional. Good as in professional. You sat up straight at the table as though at attention, your uniform crisp and well-fitting. The sharp lines accentuated the shape of your body, throwing it into relief against the wall behind you. No, not like that – it was just that you clearly took pride in wearing your uniform, something the general could appreciate. He suddenly felt faintly warm and a bit lightheaded. Before he could notice anything else, Hux swallowed hard and closed the distance to your table. 

“Captain,” he addressed you. You started slightly in surprise.

“Oh, General Hux! I’m so sorry – I didn’t see you. I—” you moved to stand and greet him, but he motioned for you to remain sitting before situating himself in the seat across from you. It felt like he noticed every movement you made; your hands twisted together in your lap, your gaze flitted around nervously, your shoulders seemed to fold forward slightly before quickly correcting themselves. Hux was beginning to think he was having an adverse reaction to the injection. To add to his list of odd symptoms, he now felt sweaty and a bit queasy.

“I got us both a caf,” you gestured to two cups on the table. “I wasn’t sure if you drank—” 

“Not at this time during the cycle,” Hux interrupted. This strange illness was putting him on edge – he didn’t have time for this nonsense. 

“Oh, um… I’m sorry,” you murmured in response, one of your hands moving from your lap to rub mindlessly up and down your arm. Hux watched the motion for a moment before forcing himself to focus. What had been in that injection?

“What is it you want, Captain?” he asked sharply, barely able to keep his foot from drumming on the floor. He needed to get back to his quarters and contact medical. The abrupt question brought your gaze to his in an instant, and Hux suddenly felt like he might be about to faint again. Looking into your eyes, he felt dizzy, like he wasn’t quite sure where the floor was anymore.

“Well… I just— I didn’t want anything really. I just transferred to the Finalizer and Jeela – I mean Captain Mitaka – said her brother knew you and that it might be good to— well, that maybe we could—”

“Do you have a point, Captain?” Hux interrupted you again. The sound of your voice was having a strange effect on him. He was feeling a little breathless and the queasy sensation in his stomach was becoming stronger. He was certain you could see him sweating.

You had stopped speaking, but your mouth remained open in a surprised ‘o’ for a second longer before you appeared to realize and snap it shut. He caught your gaze again for just a moment, but he suddenly felt like he was falling. Then you averted your eyes and the sensation ended abruptly. 

“I think I should go,” your voice was even softer than before, and almost a little… hoarse? You hurriedly collected your things and stood. Hux echoed the movement.

“An excellent idea, Captain. I have much that needs my attention,” Hux said with as much authority as he could muster given his clearly sickened condition. You nodded absently at the statement, and turned to go, your eyes catching his once last time before you left. He thought for a moment that he had imagined the beginnings of tears pooling in them, but quickly ascribed this to his eyesight going slightly blurry as a result of his unknown illness. He turned in the opposite direction and walked quickly back to his quarters.

Within half an hour, he was back in medical, much to his displeasure. The head medic flipped through reports on her datapad, shaking her head slightly.

“Well General, the attending medic says he noticed no adverse reactions to the injection when he performed his examination of your condition just now, though he did make a note of your symptoms. It is not unusual to faint as a result of an injection. I would presume you are simply experiencing some lingering effects of that faintness.”

“You’re certain there’s nothing seriously wrong?” Hux pressed, clenching his hands into fists and trying not to sound too desperate. He had had hours to recover from his faint and hadn’t felt any symptoms in that whole time until he met with you. He was certain it had to be a delayed reaction to the injection; it wasn’t logical for it to still be the effects of the faint.

“Based on these reports, I’m quite certain, General. But if you experience new or worsening symptoms, be sure to contact us immediately. I would recommend trying to get some rest.”

Hux just nodded, collecting his greatcoat and returning to his quarters again, his mind swimming, trying to make sense of his odd illness. Removing his uniform and placing each piece in its designated location, he allowed himself to collapse into his bed for once. Sleeping was not something at which he excelled, but he couldn’t let this strange affliction affect his work, and if the head medic said that rest would help, then he was determined to try. Just as he was attempting to get comfortable, his datapad pinged.

Kriff, Hux I thought I told you to TRY

Hux let out a heavy sigh and rubbed his hands over his face before responding to Mitaka’s message.

I was unwell. I had to return to medical.

You treated the captain like bantha shit Mitaka shot back. Anger bubbled up in Hux’s throat. No he hadn’t – he was legitimately unwell, and the captain’s presence seemed to exacerbate his condition. He was completely justified in cutting the meeting short. He cast the datapad aside, deciding not to validate Mitaka’s comment with a response. Anyway, what kind of way was that to speak to a superior officer, even if Mitaka was on Hux’s personal staff? Perhaps he’d write up an infraction report in the morning.

Hux rolled over, pulling the sheet up to his chin. He closed his eyes, hoping the sweet yet fickle embrace of sleep would see fit to grant him some rest. Instead, Mitaka’s words echoed in his head. He let out a huff of annoyance, already drafting the infraction report in his mind. But then those thoughts faded to a remembrance of his meeting with you. Against his wishes, his memories played the interaction over and over again. He saw you once more, the smart figure you cut in your uniform, the small gestures that had captured his complete attention, your soft, faltering voice, the depth of your gaze when it met his. 

For the first time, he realized you were nervous to meet him. How could he have been so oblivious? Every word and action screamed it now as he played everything back. And that last glance – were those tears? Kriff – what had he said? He could see you so clearly, but he could barely remember a word he had spoken. He gripped the sheets and pulled them even tighter around himself, as though the pressure would push the memories from his mind. Mitaka’s words echoed through his thoughts once more, but this time instead of the hot rush of anger, he felt his stomach tie itself into knots. The image of tears forming in your eyes lodged itself in his mind as one cycle clicked to the next.

[arom-antix]

Aaaaand we're back. Sadly. Of course we are. More @thegirlwhorideslikeasamurai bs! Notice how that @ leads nowhere? Well, that's the topic I'm here to add to the situation about.

For those who haven't been following this situation, here's a link to the TL;DR post of it which includes links to everything else.

Anyway, let me actually get straight to the point for once: Samurai changed their URL. And blog name. And description. And removed their original pinned post. And did all of this on seemingly all their socials. Her new URL (and username on other platforms) is @thegayfigureskatingagenda, so if you see that URL, now you know who's behind it.

(Sidenote because I'm petty: I just gotta say her new description including "Too old for fandom drama." is rich coming from her but I digress).

To catch some concerns from the off: Isn't it mean and witch hunting to chase her around the Internet? Shouldn't we just let it go? And to that I ask: Would you let a criminal who hurt your friends go just because they left the country and changed their name? Of course you wouldn't, and I won't either. People should know that Samurai is running from accountability. She hasn't apologised. She hasn't done anything I've seen to make things better with the people she's hurt. To her credit, she hasn't posted anything obviously stupid for a while, but she's barely been posting at all, just reblogging stuff, so I'm not gonna give her points for that.

But what if this is her attempt to redeem herself? Well, she might have better success if she apologised. It doesn't have to be a big public sobfest, she could just privately reach out. But Arom, what if she has, and you just don't know? Well, she certainly hasn't apologised to any of the multiple victims I'm in contact with who have also publicly and thoroughly exposed her on multiple platforms. If I was Samurai, I'd probably start there. Even if my motivation was entirely selfish, getting them to stop calling me out would be my primary goal which means I'd still start there. So. You know. If she's apologised, she's sure prioritised her time poorly.

So, if this is her genuine attempt at redemption, she better start doing some apologising. That's all I want. For her to apologise and do better in the future. Not either or. She must do both. Regardless of how perfect she might become in the future, I still won't stop putting pressure on her to own up to her mistakes and apologise to those she's hurt. Because they deserve it. I don't care that it's hard. I don't care if she "needs time". The victims have been waiting for way too long already. Do better.

And I'm sorry if I seem extremely quick to judge her, but to be honest, she's given me very little incentive to offer her the benefit of the doubt and trust her ability to change for the better. If you think that's mean, go read the post linked at the top. Go read all the posts. And remember as you read that she has not made a single direct response to this. If we were getting it all wrong, all she had to do was explain herself, but she has failed to do that repeatedly and has instead decided to run from her problems by changing her name. And I, for one, don't aim to let her get away with it. She must at the very least apologise before I'll even consider letting her move on and this be a thing of the past. The victims aren't gonna magically forget Samurai's mistreatment of them just because she wants to move on. Plenty are still hurting. Don't let her get away with thinking that running away is a viable option.

And Samurai, if you're reading this, it's as I said before: It's entirely up to you what I do next. Own up, and do better, and I won't ever breathe your name again. You'll be free. But keep running, and I'll keep chasing. It's up to you.

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

s2 episode 10 "red museum" thoughts

woohoo! this episode has "museum" in the title and i love museums! but it also talks about cults in the description and i'm less keen on those

update: there were no real museums :( i feel lied to and cheated

we open on some cows. i was admiring their cuteness and their wonderful sounds by writing "moo" in my notes before we get a JUMPSCARE to a beef processing plant which. augh. unpleasant. i do not care for meat related story lines.

we see this woman working at the processing facility and she comes home to her kids and no husband in sight (a single mom who works two jobs, who loves her kids and never stops, iktr)

and she's getting in the shower but we see some fellow with glasses is WATCHING her. the question is from where and how?!? oh very creepy!!!

then the older brother leaves and we find him in the morning stripped to his underwear in the woods and whimpering. and his back is covered in writing.

so naturally my first thought was "what does this have to do with the meat? or did they just jumpscare me with unrelated meat imagery?"

(we later learn that it is, in fact, related. but this all happened before the title sequence even aired, so i was a little suspicious!)

cut to our beloved duo. mulder says this waking up in the woods with writing on the back and no memory thing has happened to a bunch of other kids. and scully's like "but why does this interest you?" and he says the sheriff claims they're being possessed which does seem up his alley

they're in the car with the sheriff and mulder was a gentleman and let scully sit in the front <3 he said my queen, you have endured so much, and motion sickness shall not be one of your troubles

at this point i realized the earlier meat scenes WERE related because the sheriff is introducing this new religious cult, who are vegetarians and bought a ton of cows to keep as pets. cows are cute but a bit large for pets in my opinion.

next they SHARE AN UMBRELLA on the way to the church's sermon thingy

okay so the leader is typing while someone reads his words which is certainly a presentation style. they all wear red turbans. and scully says she doesn't think they seem like the type to get involved in all this. she wanted them to be innocent so she could pet their cows. i'm onto you.

mulder hears a few lines of their chanting and says that these are "walk-ins'', which means the people think enlightened beings are controlling their bodies. okay theological king!

they go to talk to the boy who was in the woods in his underwear and man. we get this shot of mulder in the back. and his coat. is so comically large. i had to pause. take a deep breath. and remember the origins of my url.

the teenager says he thinks he was maybe possessed by an animal spirit or something, he doesn't know, and scully's sleuthing around the house when she discovers a child (the teenager's brother) and they are having a chat (again how much of this work involves talking to children) but SOMEONE is WATCHING THEM and it is CREEPY!!

cutscene to the pair eating ribs together and scully has sauce on her face and mulder wipes it off for her. and i squeaked. a squeak emerged from my body. look what they've driven me to. i am a woman with dignity squeaking over a rib date.

and why did they both look so good? but i was especially admiring mulder, in his silly little rib eating fit, explain the cult's reasoning behind a new spirit taking over the bodies of those who lost hope. i was embarrassed at myself for how attractive i found him. but then i remembered there are a lot of people who have probably been in a similar situation. so thank u for following this blog so i feel less alone in that manner.

oh nooo a bunch of kids are being mean to one of the church members on the side of the road... mulder gets up to intervene and tells them to gtfo (we love a man that stands for morals and justice)

the lead bully is ANGRY and sees scully come out and says "why don't you run along with the little wife" in her direction which is exactly what i have been saying but no one listens to me.

(neither of them seem to care that this happened which makes me think it's not the first time such words have been tossed in their direction)

and he's all "my father will hear about this" because the girl notices scully has a gun and gasp. he's the sheriff's son! so mulder's like "yeah i think he WOULD like to know about this" and they beat it

there's a moment where scully says it's hard to know who is in the wrong without having a scorecard, implying that keeping up with small town drama is impossible, and mulder is gazing at her. like GAZING at her. i think he heard the wife suggestion and was seriously mulling it over.

then the sheriff's son is making out with this girl for a time i considered far too long. but she goes back to where she lives and she sees a dog! a very cute dog! she appears to know this dog and goes to visit when BAM! dog-related kidnapping occurs :(

she ends up down to her underwear in the woods and she's hallucinating a giant crow eating her and also being swarmed with bugs which seems deeply unpleasant

scully does a check up on her because she is a DOCTOR and you had best not forget it! she seems fine... except... weird chemical in blood... a chemical you'd need to be some sort of doctor to know about... and we see the cult leader used to be a doctor before getting kicked out of the doctor world... it's not looking great for him

they pay him a visit but he won't let them enter his place because they will defile the sacredness of the space with their meat-eating aura. and then all of the members of the church swarm our duo's car and OHH it was creepy. but they manage to bring him into the station for questioning.

they're trying to ask him about the weird chemicals and he's going on about the injustice of eating cows and at this point the sheriff starts screaming at the guy. and mulder has to escort the sheriff out and tell him to be normal.

he says something about the guy starting a lot of trouble for being a holy man and i was thinking to myself. famously holy men DO cause a lot of trouble. this is perfectly on brand.

so then the rest of the church members were protesting outside of the bbq restaurant where our besties recently ate. and the sheriff's son comes out and throws COW BLOOD on them. he took his notes from carrie i see. the sheriff is PISSED and wrangles him up.

while all of this is going down, a strange man is beckoning to scully. and i am of the opinion that strange men beckoning to women should be avoided, but this is what separates me from the fbi agents of the world, because she goes over and he says he wants to show them something

at this point, the score to the show was going hard. i was jamming out. it was really getting dramatic as they rode over to some place and then got out of the car.

this strange man is talking about how he used to own this land, but he sold it and got rich, and he's saying that the new people inject the cows with stuff. i felt as if this episode was trying to make me a lil vegan.

scully's talking about how growth hormone is safe but the guy is not buying whatever the government has to say on the subject. and yeah like scully the government did just take you for a while so maybe they're actually lying? who knows. she went to med school and i didn't. frankly i don't want anything extra in my cow

we see the glasses of the man who was watching them earlier doing some cow injections! the amount of red flags here is staggering...

at this point, our regularly scheduled plot is interrupted by an excellent (and by that, of course, i mean entirely unrealistic) CGI helicopter crash that had be yelling at the screen. i LOVE 90's CGI it always fills me with whimsy. like sorry i know this was a serious scene but it looked funny and i laughed!!!

the two people on the helicopter are dead, and one of them was a doctor, who was found with a briefcase full of cash and a mysterious liquid... hmm..

mulder enters the room. "scully? you're not gonna believe this"

YESSSS! he said the LINE! i had seen it meme'd into my vocabulary far before i had ever decided to watch this show, or even had any idea what it was referring to. i would just mumble "scully, you're never gonna believe this" to myself whenever i learned any surprising information. for at least the last 5 years or so. so this felt very full circle to me. he did it.

he also proceeds to say something that scully can, in fact believe, because she already figured it out herself

so here's the situation: the doctor was treating a bunch of kids, including all of those who had gone into a frenzy in the woods. but what is the through-line here...?

we see glasses man again and then a RANDOM FARMER IS SHOT DEAD!

they go back to the house of the mom and the kids, and she's like yeah my son was getting vitamin shots from that guy. man i hate to tell you but i think there was more than vitamins in those shots. but mulder is... distracted by something.

there's a light coming from the bathroom mirror and he realizes there's something behind it. so he wraps his hand up and PUNCHES IT (bad luck be upon him for 7 years)

he finds what he refers to as a "private little movie studio" with a running camera and a TON of vhs tapes... nasty!!! not good!!!

cutscene to the sheriff's son, who has undergone a kidnapping and has not woken up! sheriff is naturally in deep distress. it turns out that he was actually murdered.

the car of our duo passes that of the gunman who shot that random farmer and scully realizes she knows that face... and i'm thinking that it did not look familiar at all. maybe it's someone she went to school with?

mulder is interrogating the video man, and he's getting real rough with him. he smacks him on the head, which is justified considering he was filming people in their home, but i do worry that mulder's interrogation violence will someday get him fired. the dude swears up and down that he did NOT kill them, but he did do the kidnapping and writing, because the doctor was experimenting on those kids and turning them into "monsters"

scully makes a connection... the gunman she saw before... was the FELLOW THAT KILLED DEEP THROAT???!!!! she has to excuse herself from the room at this revelation

mulder is deep in interrogation mode and the glasses slash video guy is saying that the doctor paid people- himself included- to inject the cows with a mystery substance, and that he must have been doing it to the kids he was treating as well

scully's back in the room and her and mulder are so close. so close. there is no reason for them to be that close. but here they are.

she says the stuff in the bottle was unidentifiable. that's actually not what she says, she said something about the number of proteins it had, and that means nothing to me but mulder goes OFF. he takes her outside the room and starts yelling at her about this meaning something.

here, at this moment, is where i realize what was happening: deep throat had mentioned to scully how they were dealing with people so cruel that they injected alien dna into kids. and i was putting 2 and 2 together JUST AS our main characters were. which honestly i feel like i should have picked up on that earlier but i hone in on character details and not alien details so sue me.

anyway mulder is absolutely gagged. he's yelling about "deep throat dying for this", and scully looks super super scared. he tells her to head out and that he wants this gunman taken alive

next we see him knock on the door of the... cult leader?!?! yes, you heard me right! mulder explains that he KNOWS it might offend this dude's religion, but he needs help. and so all of the kids and the families involved with the secret alien injection are taken to the barn where these people worship. tensions are boiling.

scully asks the sheriff where mulder is and he says that he left because he thought he knew where the gunman was. and this was not part of the plan, the splitting up and going to an undisclosed location! but i can imagine that this was deeply personal for him on the levels of 1. having lost deep thoat 2. having lost his sister and requesting any information pertaining to aliens and 3. these were the folks that kidnapped him at the end of s1 so. he had some scores to settle.

he goes to the beef processing plant, where he finds a TON of gasoline poured all over the floor. now, if i were mulder, being both deathly afraid of fire and also generally concerned with my life, i would have gotten tf out of there. but i am not mulder, and he keeps going on his quest to find this man.

gunman launches a sneak attack from behind a cow. which is not a bad place for a dramatic stakeout/fight scene but boy i'd hate to be there irl. and things are looking tough for mulder, who gets off his feet, only to be locked inside the building while this dude gets his lighter. he's about to drop it when...

scully walks in! with backup! she's got her gun pointed at him and he's wavering but the sheriff shoots him like 800 times. because he was the one that must have killed his son, so it was deeply personal. he's crying while doing this.

mulder stands over his body so sadly, knowing that he will never get the information he wants

scully concludes the episode by writing her case report, talking about how the kids who were infected have started getting sick. none of the kids from the church were infected, so it seems they were a control group. so in that case, the cult leader would have to have been in on this whole thing! oh, it's dramatic

but wait! if our duo had so recently eaten the infected meat, does that mean they are susceptible to aliens in their blood? and who knows who else ate the meat that was shipped out all around the country! aliens could be running rampant!

(i don't think that is actually the case- i'd have to imagine eating alien protein once is a lot different than getting it injected in you regularly for your whole life. but still. could complicate an already complicated situation. i mean, they've already endured evil cocoon bugs, exposure to that fungal virus, scully's coma... their doctors must be baffled at their medical history)

anyway, pretty good episode! i wish i could explain the joy that crossed my face when he said the line. and when they had a little rib date. oh man i needed that. that was good for me. i'll pass on meat imagery, like always, but it was interesting how they built this episode out of that one line in the s1 finale- or that they had planned it that way from the start. i didn't think we'd ever see what that whole process looked like! and it's good to get more info on our late friend deep throat. i still don't fully believe he's dead. you have to keep some suspicions on these things in sci fi.

[anghraine]

Dealing with images on Dreamwidth

Okay, one more Dreamwidth post!

DW is geared around text posts and currently handles images rather awkwardly. But it does actually have image hosting capabilities, though the space isn't unlimited (I've never come near to maxing it out). I was thinking about that and figured I could make a post over here about how I back up images to Dreamwidth, and then post them using the Rich Text Editor.

I tried to explain what I do as clearly as I could, but the detail might make it sound more complex and difficult than it really is. I'm sorry if so! But here goes:

Step 1: Go to the main page at www.dreamwidth.org. It should look something like this:

Step 2: Click the red button in the upper-right to log in. Once you do, the main page should look something like this:

Step 3: If you look below the Dreamwidth logo, you'll see five categories of things you can do. You want the first category, "Create." Click on it and select "Upload Images" from the drop-down list. I've put a blue circle around it in the picture below:

Step 4: Upload your picture!

The picture above is the standard "Upload Images" screen. From here, you can click the link to "View all your images" to see everything you've uploaded, and I think "manage your images" lets you adjust titles and descriptions of the images and such. But what you want is the "Browse" button. It'll take you to your computer files and you can upload the picture or pictures you want.

Let's suppose I want to upload two pictures from Baldur's Gate 3:

and

Okay. So after I click "Browse", find the right folder on my computer, and use CTRL+click to select both of these pictures (you can also upload pictures one-by-one if you wish), the space below the "Browse" button will show the pictures you've uploaded. It should look something like this:

There they are! You can give the pictures names in the "Title" boxes, but if you want the file names saved, make sure you click the "Save descriptions" button below the pictures (circled in blue below):

At this point (much faster than it sounds like), you've uploaded the pictures to your account where you can look at every picture or file you've ever uploaded to Dreamwidth. That's cool, but they're not actually in a post yet.

Step 5: Make a new post.

In a new tab, open Dreamwidth (www.dreamwidth.org) again. It's important that this is in a different tab and you don't navigate away from the one your pictures are showing on.

You should see the "Post" button in the upper right of the main page, below your username. I've circled it in blue here:

Click on "Post."

That'll take you to the Create Post page where you actually put things on your blog.

I'm currently trying out the beta version of this page that's going to get applied pretty soon, so the style looks a little different here than in standard Dreamwidth. I figured I'd use the beta version because a) it's what people will see in the future, and b) we're going to use the old Rich Text Editor that is the same in both styles.

The Rich Text Editor has a blue rectangle around it and a blue arrow pointing at it in the picture above.

Let's narrow in on the Rich Text Editor. Like in any post, you can just start typing into the Rich Text Editor, if you want words at all. So here I typed a little explanation for the BG3 pictures and put the cursor where I want the pictures to show up.

You can see that there's a bar of options above what I've typed, with buttons that let you bold, italicize, underline, etc. We want a button further on—the square button with a yellow background that looks like a tiny landscape of mountains and sunshine. I've put a blue circle around it on the screenshot below:

Step 6: Add your pictures!

Clicking on the little landscape button will open a box where you can paste the URL of any image you want to put in your Dreamwidth post. The image doesn't have to be hosted on Dreamwidth—you could paste a link to a picture on Tumblr or whatever—but it'll be more stable if it is, so that's what we're doing.

It looks like this:

Since we already uploaded our pictures to Dreamwidth in the earlier steps, we just need the URLs for the pictures. There's a pretty easy way to see what it is.

Step 7: Copy-paste the URL.

Click back to the tab with your newly uploaded pictures. There will be a code at the bottom of each one. In our case, it looks like this:

It might look a bit intimidating if you're not used to code, but you can ignore the most of it. You just want that little part that begins with https and ends with .jpg.

Copy the URL (I've put a blue box around it above) and click back to the Create Post tab. The "Image Properties" box from Step 6 should still be up.

Paste the URL into the top box that says "URL." I've surrounded the correct box with a red rectangle in this picture:

Hit the "OK" button at the bottom and:

You'll see tiny boxes around the frame. Those will go away if you click anywhere other than the picture; they're for adjusting the size.

Step 8: Adjust the picture if you want

You know how Tumblr automatically stretches/shrinks pictures to make them fit? Dreamwidth just leaves them the way they are, so if your original picture is very big, it will look very big, and if it's small, it will look small. But you can adjust the picture yourself.

Maybe my picture of Shadowheart seems really big compared to the text and I want it smaller. I'll click on the tiny box in the upper-left corner of the picture (that one simply because it's the most convenient) and drag it inwards until the picture is the size I want.

And there she is!

BTW: No matter what size you make a picture look in your post, once it is posted, you can always right-click with your mouse and say "open image in new tab" to see it in its real size.

Here's a real post I made with a picture of Shadowheart I'd slightly shrunk in the Dreamwidth editor:

But if I right-click on the image and tell it to open in another tab, you can see that the saved picture is actually full-size:

So feel free to adjust your picture in the post however you want; it won't change the version you originally uploaded to Dreamwidth.

I'm sure there are other ways to do this, but that's how I get images uploaded to Dreamwidth and then embedded in Dreamwidth posts!

[spot-the-antisemitism]

All right. This isn't exactly antisemitism, but it's adjacent. I'm sorry for disturbing you, I'm just trying to make a closing comment to my anon asks.

Hello. I am a person who prefers to remain anonymous because I don't want my blog to be associated with political discourse. So far, I sent exactly three anons where I use my self description as an Israeli Orthodox Zionist Jew as the only signature (though another thing two of them have in common is length). I have sent some time ago an ask to Feygaleh, asking her to hear me out in an attempt to de-escalate the situation between her and most of Jumblr with full awareness that it's not very likely to succeed. I tried (among other reasons) because she was relatively new to Tumblr, so I thought she couldn't be too deep. I was not aware of everything she posted on the topic of antizionism and antisemitism.

So, when she said she was willing to hear me out I sent her another ask, detailing a certain outlook at some things - it was relatively tame and was more about tolerance and two theoretical extremes on the scale of Zionism - both with the fundamental flaw of excluding everyone who disagrees with them and not accepting Judaism that isn't Just Like Them. A link will be supplied in the end.

Feygaleh published my ask without saying much on it. That would've been the end of it. But because I've asked on anon and thus wouldn't have been notified of the answer, I was visiting Feygaleh's page regularly to see if she answered. And that led me directly to Mossadspypidgeon's reply on Feygaleh's post about Shabbat.

What I did next was pretty foolish, and a result of me possibly perceiving Feygaleh's willingness to listen as more significant than it probably was. And I didn't really enjoy seeing someone harassing someone else on a post that has nothing to do with antizionism. So, I sent Mossadspypidgeon an ask explaining why I think she's been acting in hypocrisy (one if her reblogs of the aforementioned Shabbat post talked about harassing people on unrelated posts. That... Didn't end up well. She insinuated I was defending an antisemite, sending pictures of myriads of posts by Feygaleh - including one when she reblogged Black September, which I was not aware of. In addition, she insinuated that Feygaleh wasn't Jewish at all and obviously enough doubted my self identifications - which, fair, I really can't give receipts for those, not yo speak of anon. I didn't intend to use it as a way to legitimize my criticism, I just really needed a recognizable signature because I didn't want to be mixed up with other anons. And one of the reblogs apparently suggested that I'm STA? Which, I can't really refute all things considered (still anon), but I'm pretty sure my writing style is distinctive enough from theirs, even though I was a little too cynical and sarcastic in the latter ask.

I'm sending this to you because you seemed to be slightly closer to my views on Feygaleh and this affair - the view that she's probably a Jewish antizionist, and that harassing her on unrelated posts isn't good.

I'm sending this as closure - I don't intend to write any more anon asks on the topic, not to speak of talking about it in my blog. Mossadspypidgeon gave me a stark reminder of why I don't do that - my blog can't have any more credentials than an anon ask regarding my identity.

On that topic, I would say I was trying to develop a way to identify people it's safe to talk to about Israel - based on how many times and in what contexts they mention Judaism or the Jewish people. People who have zero posts mentioning those or just ones about Queer Jews are probably fine, ones where Jews are only mentioned in relation to I/P as tokenization are worrying and probably problematic. And the easiest (though not necessarily certain) meter for if someone is really Jewish is how many posts simply talking about Jewish life they have. With blogs like yours - blogs that focus on talking about antisemitism for the most part - it doesn't really work, though.

Feel free to not answer this ask, as it technically doesn't have much to do with you. Here's the link to my second ask to Feygaleh: https://www.tumblr.com/feygaleh/768809808901128192

I would prefer to not supply a link to my ask to Mossadspypidgeon, but in the spirit of full honesty: https://www.tumblr.com/mossadspypigeon/768960817988288512

That sums up what I've done here, I'm not sure I added any good to the world if I'm being honest, which is another reason for me to stop. So, thank you for answering my ask*, and goodbye. Oh, and sorry for dumping it on you.

---

*no one will see it if you don't answer, so it's sensible to say this!

here's my own reply to it like Feygaleh and Mossadspypigeon have had their little nemesis spat but really the idea that if someone is faking Jewish they deserve harm and harasment is terrible and why she blocked me AFTER unblocking me solely to get screenshots from me so yeah she's definantly using me but I feel like Feygaleh is tokenizing you instead of having a real convo with an Israeli, the fact that you are anonymous and don't have posts Faygeleh could disagree with or be upset by makes you the perfect token Jew

"With blogs like yours - blogs that focus on talking about antisemitism for the most part - it doesn't really work, though." No actaully the way a Jew and a gentile talk about antisemitism is completely different, I think you can tell I experience it first hand when I talk about it so no. I disagree

and the reason she blocked me? I defended her instead of staying silent and let her get abuse!

Be free of drama and go have closure anon,

Cecil

[reading-comp-wrong-answers]

Greetings, people with inferior reading comprehension. There used to be this blog around here (@reading-comp-posting) that posts questions on reading comprehension. It was my goal to answer them. Though, seeing as they've deactivated since I created this blog, I will now change to answering posts in a similar formatting. All my answers shall be 100% correct. (Please ignore my url, and blog title, and blog description. Those are incorrect.) And yes, my favourite hobby is urinating on people with little wealth, how could you guess?

Now, I recommend trying to answer these questions yourself first, and using mine as something to read and to learn from. If you believe you've found a flaw in my answers, you're allowed to send me an ask, preferably with a link to the post with the answer you're talking about, and I shall explain to you why my answer was correct.

Fully answering questions to a post may take some time, because I too am restrained to a human body and only capable of typing so fast, but if I have not answered such a post for as far as you can tell, you are allowed to tag me in it; I'm unfortunately incapable of seeing all posts on this website.

[aspecpplarebeautiful]

Hi, I just saw a blog have a DNF for 'ace discourse blogs' and was wondering if you could explain what that means? Back in my day, if someone hated ace discourse, it was because they were aphobes. Is that still the case or is it just the youth misusing the term the same way they misuse proship? Thanks! 🤍

Yeah, I'm not good at deciphering how people mean these things a lot of the time either. In a case like this, what I'd do is a search to see if they've posted anything about asexuality or aces. And if it's positive, I figure we're good, if it's negative or I can't find anything then I don't follow. (There may be an innocent reason for there being nothing, but sometimes too past ace exclusionists will have purged their blog so people don't know they used to be part of that whole thing, so I always figure better safe than sorry if they have a thing like that in their description.)

If you're not sure how to search type username.tumblr.com/search/asexual into the url bar and repeat for ace.

All the best!

[thatone-churro]

hey there. making a pinned post for new people to navigate this organized mess of a blog. but i like conciseness (that’s a lie) so it’s all going under a readmore.

yo. i’m grace.

i’m an adult ace lesbian.

not placing my exact age in this post because i know i’ll forget to update it but it’s on my blog description.

my gender is also “lesbian” but i don’t feel like explaining that every single time so i’m also a woman because it’s close enough.

i use she/her/they pronouns. which means i prefer she/her most of the time but i’m not averse to the occasional “they”

i’m not glued to particular fandoms. i tag every post/reblog about the media with said media. however, i’m a big fan of demon slayer/kimetsu no yaiba, jojo’s bizarre adventure, and pokemon, so those will pop up frequently. i also read warrior cats when i was a kid so i’m haunted by that curse, too. also tagged accordingly.

i also love music. like a LOT. personally, the bands/artists that i’m big on are: Medusa, Crawlers, Mothica, Xana, and VIAL as the big ones that come to mind

this blog is my main and is accordingly a mess of things. art, ocs, poetry, fangirling, whatever. i do have a handful of sideblogs.

@gs-artchive is technically my art sideblog. i forget about it a lot because i mostly do my own oc art for my personal project or my sona and that usually goes here first haha. so that’s mostly where i reblog/store my art or post my fandom-related art or edits

@ace-and-ink is my poetry sideblog. it goes kinda dead for a while because i’m both very slow at writing good stuff and also very picky with what i deem “good.” but all my poetry solely goes there (save for reach reblogging).

i’ve also got a sideblog for my personal project that’s just sitting and url-hogging at the moment. i won’t link it for now until i actually get it up and running.

and finally, let’s talk about that personal project (pretty please). it’s called Godsign (the overall series) and it’s a story/series i’ve been working on and tempering for a few years now. i’d like to begin making it as a webcomic soon enough, but i’ve still got a bit of story writing (and webcomic-related research) before that happens, but i hope sooner rather than later i can make it real. i adore talking about it, as the extensive number of posts in the godsign/grace’s ocs tags will showcase.

i’ve also got a sona named C. that’s their full name. here’s his main ref, but he’s got additional outfit refs pinned on my art blog (or provided on request) because i like playing dress-up with her :3

(she also has lore/a story universe, but that C and this C are technically different people if that makes sense. the story C is based on my sona C, you know?)

anyway, on to navigating my tags:

#grace being stupid is my general talking tag. mostly unimportant things

#grace being kinda serious for once is my actually talking about serious stuff tag

#grace’s ocs are posts about my ocs, either original or tagging them on preexisting posts

#the patron saint of asexual poets is my poetry tag. on the sideblog, it’s strictly my poetry. over here, it’s mostly anything related to my poetry or the writing process

#my babies :) is for my/my parents dogs, Zoe, Buddy, Luna, and Halo

#the draco and lu and dobby shenanigans is for one of my sisters’ dogs, Draco and Lu, and her new kitten, Dobby

#miss bojangles is for my oldest sister’s cat, Bojangles (Bo for short) who is a whole content farm on her own

#medusaposting on main is me talking about Medusa, as in the musician mentioned earlier, not the myth

#grace stop talking about crawlers challenge is all my crawlers-related rambling, posting, crying, simping, etc.

#lookee! it’s C!! is for C :3

#ace as fuck is for stuff not technically explicitly about asexuality, but ring as such to me anyway

#mothica moths is my “mothica photos as moths” series

i’ll be sure to update them if i start using others more often

i think that’s it for now. i’ll update this when i think it’s due for one. ciao for now.

[sunheart-and-investgator]

The Missing Wallet Case Masterpost

This is a post to keep track of the order of The Wallet Investigation. The parts with a + at the beginning are parts that don't progress to what's happening with the investigation, mostly just for anyone who'd like to look at the bonus art.

If any of the other people who have their characters included in this think that the events should happen in a different order please tell me! This is purely my idea of the order of events.

This is a work in progress and some of these images do not have image descriptions yet, i will be reblogging these with my own image descriptions eventually and changing the links. When i do if any of the original posters of the art wish they be changed, corrected or if they added their own image description, please tell me. If a part of the art is a reblogged post with an addition, the addition at the bottom is what the focus is on.

Last thing of note i still have some stuff in between some of these points of the story I'm still in the midst of drawing. These are marked by a (to be drawn) and their url, character or name. If anyone else involved in this has parts that want to add but are (to be drawn), tell me and I'll add them!

Twigpaw joins investigation - has id

+Investpaw explains to Twigpaw - has id

Saltypaw gets dragged in - no id

The gang goes searching - has id

Aha! We know who it is! - has id

Case solved! or is it? - id in alt

+haha i totally didnt reblog this to the wrong blog - id in alt

Wait a minute, there's more? - no id

There's more! oh no... - id in alt

Credits for everyone included so far!

Twigpaw: @bee8467

Saltypaw: @fallencloudsss

Matchpaw: @houndhowl

Draculapaw: @theanoninyourinbox

Investpaw: Me! or @100platypodesinatrenchcoat for my main

[google-searchhistory-official]

Hello Google Search History Official.

I appreciate the speculation, could you explain the "Candy Wars"?

Thank you.

J4X

It was started by two gimmick brand accounts pretending to be reese's peanut butter cups and kitkat. I forget a lot of blog urls and timeframe but here's what i remember happening.

Those two blogs were just combative in a friendly way against each other and a few more blogs popped up joining one side or the other creating a small roleplay scene. Mainly focused on candy brands at first.

Then Reese's was taken down for impersonation of a brand without clarifying their blog as parody (why my blog title/description says "not actually official")

One of the first blogs I followed in the candy wars was mini-laffytaffy because I loved the art they made. I eventually joined in too but as a Pepsi blog, and others used broader brands too but still food in some way. That became the brandom.

As with everything it came to an end due to interpersonal conflicts, drama, and others using different rules for their roleplay. oh btw, it was heavily influenced by Supernatural for some reason ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

There's still some vestiges of that left but it's not really related to the parody accounts popping up today, i think.

[bubblingbeach]

dude I am so sorry for the ask but how do I get my articles published? I have Zip's draft page but I don't know how to get it added to the mascotcon :'( i'm gonna go fiddle with it and i'm waiting for the Backrooms blog to reply :) have a good day cool artist

the process is a lot easier for art pages than it is for articles! there's a decent guide for artpages here, but the gist is:

assuming you have a wikidot account, tell a site staff member you'd like to submit art and ask them for the posting password. one of the admins (bluesignet) actually runs the tumblr account, so she should be able to hook you up there

once you have that, you can make a new url on the wiki (in your case, probably just "zip" at the end of the base url), and then put the password AND "art:[art page name]" in the password field. the guide doesn't mention you need both but you do.

and then you have a free page to make! it pretty much comes down to uploading the image, including it in the site's code, and adding a title/description. steps 5-10 in the guide do a good job of this

since you're making a mascotcon page, you'll want to add "mascotartcon2024" to the tags as well as "art". there's a couple other stuff regarding parenting that i can explain further, but there's a good chance either blue or another staff member can take care of that for you! probably.

[forcedhesitation]

only received about 150 follows or so bots from last night. thank goodness this is slowing down. there is still a discrepancy between my follower counts each day, that I'm not able to explain. I don't know if I just can't see certain bots, or something, because I've scrolled through my entire follower list and not found bots to account for this increased number. I know for a fact my follower count wasn't that high before, so I'm a bit confused...

I will warn anyone else, though, that the bots aren't always using the default new account picture with some random three word url. nor are all of them trying to advertise online gambling. some of them do actually have "bios" that try to mimic the bios of real accounts.

common features I've noticed in the "bios" of these mimic bots:

usually a nondescript anime character profile picture. very often the character will have pale skin, dark hair, and white clothing. if not this, it's a photo of an actual person with a similar appearance, but the photo might be a bit artsy, like a close up of the face, or a mysterious side profile.

if the profile picture does not feature a person, it will likely be a cat photo.

there is usually just one emoji in the bio, and it might not even have anything to do with their name. most common ones I saw were any one of the heart emojis.

the description might fully repeat their url, or contain some slight variation of their url, and then pronouns. usually nothing else will be included, except maybe a country or just "minor." The way all of this information is written is formatted without the typical consideration for readability that real human tumblr users typically have, and looks more like an unformatted copy-paste.

there are sometimes weird characters in the bio that make no sense to use. Like a percentile sign (%) placed in a strange place, for example.

as is common with other bots, there are no posts on the blog, or there is just one post. most common subject for that one post seems to be a cat photo, or a link to something. which you should obviously never click.

You do not get a notification for the follow from this account. Over the past few days, I've gotten thousands of bot follows. I am still only getting notifications for follows from real people though, and not for any of the bots. So that gives away who the mimic bots are. of course, there is the chance that notifications may not be working correctly all the time, so take this piece of advice with a grain of salt.

hope no one else has to deal with this bullshit. If you are dealing with it, I pray that it will not be anywhere near as bad as what I had. if you can, try to report as many as you reasonably can because that at least gives information to the people on staff whose job it is to handle bots.

[thebeeholdersarchiveblog]

~Nov 15, '23~

{I will keep up this pointed post until someone accepts the offer, so it is still open if you're seeing this!}

Hey guys! I love the Miraculous fandom and show, but I'm losing interest in running this blog. If anyone wants to take my spot as Vesperia, dm this blog and you can use the icon, blog header, description, all associated in-character hashtags, and url.

I will not delete this blog because it apparently will cause my main to be deleted too or something??? But I will change the url and description to explain that this blog is no longer in the rp.

You all can still ask me miraculous things on my main and my art blog, I still like the show!

I will also probably no longer play Sasha/Knife-ish anymore, so you can dm about her too but I have a feeling there will be less interest ;P

HERE is a link to my original pin post for this blog!

My main is @thatonesongyouretryingtoremember If you really want to reach me there for non-rp things.

[favoredsouls]

Why'd you change your URL? Did you leave the Collective all of a sudden?

I left a bit ago. Probably a few months back. I just haven't been too in touch with the Collective for a while but still love this blog and wanted to keep it. I found a lot of good inspiration here. It felt like I got distant and didnt participate much with others anymore so figured i would open the space for others with more passion to take part.

Sorry I didn't make a post about it but I honestly didn't want the attention on it. I don't do well with spotlights even if I do love them a bit and I dont handle loud goodbyes well. I messaged Rogue explaining some of this, asked to keep it on the downlow, changed my url and took out the official Collective member part of my description. Really it just came down to "I don't follow the news or participate with the Collective on tumblr or discord anymore." I still follow a lot of them and will like posts and reblog the ones I really like. I haven't had much of a chance to talk to the ones I used to though but maybe ill have time and energy to reach out again. I just haven't been able to keep up with the community or any events that popped up. Which is okay. Just felt like I was doing a solo thing for a while and figured i'd just go and do that actually.

I know you didn't ask but I feel like yammering on a little. I miss it. The people were always so nice and supportive. But it wasn't something I felt the same connection to as before or after I joined. I got distant but thats on me. I changed and figured it wasn't a genuine passion like it used to be. So make space for folks who do have the passion to post more often and talk to people about their ideas and take part in the events and stuff. Thats what the Collective is about and I didn't feel, amongst other feelings and nonfeelings, that I was really engaging with that idea anymore.

Thanks for asking. Its been nice to talk about it a bit. I hope that explains things abit cause I know it must be confusing sometimes. Hope you have a good night!