#upset or.. make the children stop being transphobic i guess

[smudgefawn]

i was thinking abt the aggressive degendering i experienced doing theatre as a teen and generally the state of things and/or me at the time and just had an OH MY GOD THAT WAS SO BAD moment

[internet-freakkkk]

Sad but ok

2.Tea, especially chai. Coffee makes them sleepy

3.Warm bed with lots of blankets or small spot under a bookshelf in a library (my IRL safe space in school)

4. it would take a lot. They can read people from the get go (ah yes, another trait I have that I put onto my OCs)

5.Whims, softie, they go by anything as long as it's nice.

6.fiction and fluff.

7. Very assertive, always polite

8.Very friendly

9. Ok let's take a break for a moment

10.lota of humor makes them laugh, nothing offensive to people but actual dark humor is hilarious. Makes jokes about trauma without realizing

11.usually avoids pranks, ok with them as long as it's not too bad

12.very healthy, kind of a clean freak

13. Very fabulous, always cutesy with lots of strawberry designs. Always wears lace gloves

14. Easy to please

15. Has angel wings. Very adorable also

16. for a friend they usually pick that themselves. They find people and it widely varies, but for a love interest they have someone in mind (hehe suspense)

17. Soft for almost everyone, especially people who need someone to do that for them. (A specific Someone with anger issues HINT HINT)

18. I don't know any lol

19. breaking due to all the mental pressure she has

20. Sugar free candy (they can't have too much sugar)

21. If someone gives them a special gift, they will cherish it forever and will be very sad if it gets lost

22. They eat sparce, healthy meals and some snacks.

23. Butterscotch cinnamon pie. They and poppy cook it best (I've made it IRL super delish)

24. Very good at finding someone's intentions. If they trust you, it's a good sign.

25. They find it hard to not help people sometimes, along with purposely causing people pain.

26. They like animals, have no pets.

27. They love children! (They are in a TV show, ofc they do.)

28. Love YouTube and TikTok, hate Twitter and Facebook.

29. Very organized, don't like when things are messy

30. Mix of both

31. They wear the angel mask, white with golden swirls and fluffy edges

32. They wear a nice white laced dress with small hearts in the lace

33. Very friendly with strangers, usually complementing them and being very polite

34. Do they even have cars in welcome home??? Let's just say they can drive out prefer to ride bikes or walk

35. The person they like is grumpy, a bit rude, sarcastic, and she loves them to death.

36. They don't actually remember much about their past life, it usually just comes and goes. The memories they do remember cause pain and suffering, but that's life I guess.

37. Could literally be anyone and they would escape by just being let free. They usually just ask them about why they are doing this and make them feel bad. She would become their friend somehow.

38. Drink tea, watch a movie

39. Likes attention and giving too much affection. (Hey that rhymes!)

40. Ask for it back (her besties would make sure she gets it back, one way or another)

41. They would be confused.

42. She does :)

43. Lawful good.

44. Hufflepuff (I do NOT support JK Rowling. They are transphobic and a bad person)

45. Gemini

46. No religion, open to ideas

47. They politely thank them for doing something nice

48. It's hard to make her upset because she usually just refects it. If you just directly try to bully her, her friend's will come and will force you to stop. She usually isn't told that they do this and if she is she apologizes for them

49. Being alone and forgotten/replaced by someone else. They hate the idea that they are just "removed" and forgotten about.

50. Nightmares all the time, ✨ insomnia ✨(hooray I finished it :D)

Oc Asks Game

So I decided to make this because I want to get to know my OCs better and all of yours as well. Here is a short collection of asks but here is the rule: Reblog from somebody and you have to send them an ask, its only polite after all.

What is your character's reaction to a minor inconvenience? Such as getting their jumper caught on a door handle?

Tea, coffee, hot chocolate or other?

What does their safe space look like?

What do they consider to be an unforgivable action? Why?

Do they have any nicknames or pet names or other aliases?

What kind of books comfort them? What books help them heal after a hard day?

Are they a naturally assertive person or are they painfully shy?

Do they consider themselves a friendly person or aloof?

What is your character's trigger point? What makes them angry, sad or makes them go off?

What kind of jokes make them laugh?

Do they enjoy pranks or do they hate them? Are they likely to fall for a prank?

Are they an overall healthy person? Do they make for a good patient or a terror?

Describe your character's typical wardrobe for the regular day.

Are they a simple person to please or difficult?

What is the first thing people notice about them?

What do they look for in a friend? A love interest?

Who are they soft for? Do they find being soft easy or difficult?

Describe your character through a Brooklyn 99 gif or line.

What does your character consider to be their lowest point?

Does your character have a comfort item?

What would be one item that they would hate to lose most?

What are their eating habits like? Do they snack throughout the day? Or do they eat sparsely?

What is your character's favourite food and who cooks it best?

What are your character's special skills?

What are somethings they find difficult to do? Or say?

Are they an animal person? Do they have pets?

What are their opinions on children? Do they view children as sweet angels or evil crotch goblins?

If your character was in today's world, what social media platforms would they avoid? Or be prominent on?

Are they an organised person? Or more laissez-faire?

Do they dwell better in chaotic situations or more linear situations?

Your character has been invited to a masquerade ball. What mask do they wear?

Your character is having a prom night/debs. What kind of outfit do they wear?

How do they act around people they don't know? Are they shy around strangers or dismissive of them?

Can your character drive? If so, what kind of driver are they? If not what's their preferred manner of transport?

What attracts your character to another person? What kind of person do they do for?

Tell us something about your OC that doesn't make it onto the page?

Your character has been kidnapped. Who has kidnapped them and how do they escape?

How does your character unwind after a long day?

What's your character's guilty pleasure?

Your character's friend has just been mugged. What's their reaction?

Your character has been punched into the face. What's their reaction?

Does your character celebrate their birthday? If not, why?

What is the DND alignment?

Hogwarts House?

Star Sign?

Does your character believe in anything? Religion? Superstition?

What is your character's reaction when someone does something nice for them?

Is your character easy to make cry? Or angry? Or annoyed?

What is your character's biggest fear? Most irrational?

How does your sleep at night? Are they a heavy or light sleeper? Do they dream or have nightmares? Do they find it easy to sleep or are they more a night owl?

[duhragonball]

Hi! I wanna preface this by saying this isn’t a request for a liveblog, but just a recommendation for some light reading. There’s a comedy-action series currently running called Mashle: Magic and Muscles. It’s basically just taking the piss out of Harry Potter (mocking the house system, blatantly unfair classes, and just general story structure) in a sort of ‘One Punch Man’ way. It’s a lot of fun and doesn’t take long to get through at all.

I may check that out some time, but from my point of view, taking the piss out of Harry Potter is like shooting fish in a barrel. I shot the hell out of that barrel years ago, and I'm not sure there's much more appeal to be had in seeing it done again. Mashle is probably really good, but I'd probably have enjoyed it more in 2010 than in 2021.

Part of what sucked the wind out of my sails was when JKR went full-transphobe a few years ago, and it started to realize that all the pathetic asshole characters she wrote were a reflection of her own character. Snape was ultimately on the good guys' side, but he still betrayed Lupin just to be a colossal dick. Umbridge was more concerned about sorting her doilies and imposing order on others than in any sort of compassion or moral ideology. Gilderoy Lockhart was a narcissist social climber, desperate to hijack any conversation and make it about himself.

Fans want to compare JKR to Hermione, mostly for lack of any prominent female characters, but Hermione's no saint either. She spent all of Book 3 using time travel to take all of her classes, but she still talked shit about Trelawny for daring to suggest that a person could magically see into the future. Never mind that Trelawny had actually done it before, and got tenure teaching it as a recognized subject. I'm not saying Trelawny was good at her job, but you've got some girl saying "Um, actually, I think I know a little bit more about your life experiences than you do, so I'm going to do everything in my power to discredit you."

Sound familiar?

I'm sorry for going off on a tangent here. You're just recommending some manga to me, and I appreciate it, but I've had this on my mind for a while. Here's the thing I can't get out of my head: Nick Gage robbed a bank.

Let me explain. Nick Gage is a professional wrestler, specializing in "deathmatch" wrestling, where weapons are legal. One time he was pronounced legally dead during a match, because there was broken glass everywhere and he got hurt and I'm not sure I know or want to know the full story. But he got better and he's still alive today. Somewhere in between, he had some hard times and ended up robbing a bank and going to prison for five years.

But Gage is a folk hero, and I admire the man, in part because he appreciates his fans for supporting him. All of his fans, including the LBGTQ+ ones. On July 7, 2020, he cut this awesome promo declaring that trans rights are human rights. He's not sitting on a golden throne, spewing a bunch of bullshit pseudo-biology to millions of followers. He's just speaking from the heart. I think this was one of those deals where you pay someone to do a video greeting, but he went on to add that he would have said this for free, because he believes it. Here's another video where he explains why this is so important to him.

Rowling, and a lot of her characters, they always seem to "punch down", taking shots at people in worse circumstances than themselves. Nick Gage doesn't do that, probably because he's been about as down as it gets, and he knows what that's like. He knows other people have it tough and he has enough empathy to respect what other people are going through. I heard JKR was an unemployed single mother once, but it's hard to tell if she remembers any of that.

This is why I get a little nervous when I hear people talk about things being "wholesome" or "family friendly" or whatever. Because what they usually mean is that they want things to be sanitized, uncomplicated and unchallenging. I never liked the way people put Harry Potter on a pedestal of literature, perfect for young children and college classrooms alike. It carries this broad appeal, and I fear that's because it doesn't really have anything to say, no bold demand that would upset anyone. I mean, there's an implied message about the evils of classism, but Rowling doesn't seem to believe it if she's willing to turn against some of her most vulnerable fans for TERF clout.

Then they made some Harry Potter video game for PS5 or whatever, and all these fans are like "Gosh, I'd like to stop giving this hateful woman more money, but I'm afraid I simply cannot help but answer the call to Diagon Alley once more." It's gutless. You've got generations of people reading these books and the books aren't even that good, and nobody learns anything from them except how to spend more money on this shit. Nick Gage wrestles in broken glass for a living and he gets it, so why can't anyone else?

I'm sorry, I sort of hulked out there for a bit. I guess what I'm trying to say is that Mashle is probably a lot of fun, but it probably doesn't operate on this level, where all the characters are jerks and society is worse off for their introduction into Western Canon. But I might still check it out sometime.

[toziers]

can you explain what's going on right now? i keep seeing big IT blogs talking about some discourse or something but i have no idea what they're talking about other than it involves you lol

alright i like. i truly do not like having diScOurSE out in public because i’m not one to air out my dirty laundry 24/7 but seeing as how it was brought into public against my will i feel like the least i can do is clear up the situation for those who’ve been seeing the posts. 

i’m putting this under the cut bc it’s long. tws for some biphobia, brief mention of transphobia and, at the end, a rape mention. 

so if you don’t know: hi, i’m migz, i’m an it fandom blogger. its okay, i know, its really cool. part of my shtick here is that i like to turn normal thirst tags into works of art for the sake of comedy. perhaps you’ve seen some of my highlights from my “fhg” tag - perhaps your brain has been spared. either way, it became kind of “my thing” around the third or fourth week (mid nov) of me having this blog. at first, i tagged just about every ask i got mentioning the thirst tags with “bill hader” - they had to do with him, so why not tag him? it would draw more like minded people! about two days into that i got a message asking me to tag my nsfw. i am a big dumb idiot, and apologize for not initially doing it. i havent had a following bigger than like 10 in several years and completely spaced on basic etiquette. so by the end of november i was tagging everything applicable  with “notsfw” and “bill hader”. 

now you’re caught up.

on december 1st i got this message from user billhaderanti:

now i want to start by saying i absolutely was in the wrong here. i didn’t even think about how many people were being subjected to the asks i was getting - especially ones who had no idea they were all jokes. i don’t track the bill hader tag, so it just didn’t even occur to me - that’s ignorance on my part, and to anyone who was subjected to the terrors of me before my tagging system: i am genuinely sorry. i relay the same sentiment in my response, though you can tell i’m on edge.

and they replied:

clearly they Were offended by it but thats.. not the point. at this point, im feeling Really weird about the whole interaction, but still understanding, because again - i GET it. i know my posts are gross - that’s the point. it doesn’t make it excusable, though, which is why i understand why people are offended. so i responded with the only solution i Knew would keep us both safe and happy posting on our own blogs. 

so i thought this would be the end of things! i’d been pretty anxious lately already since i’d started to receive anons telling me i was gross and whore-ish for thirst posting in this way (i delete all of those, so if ur thinking about sending one, i guess no one’s stopping you but it won’t be seeing the light of the dashboard). i’m unsure if it was immediately or a few hours later, seeing as how i have a bad concept of time and the post-dates are right on the edge between nov 30 and dec 1, but i went to their blog - because anyone who has been on the internet knows the opportunity to vague post is near irresistible. and...what do ya know

fair! it’s their blog. however i am an emotionally fragile egg girl and immediately got freaked out. the odds that they were the only one who thought this were low. and, again, i’ve been very open on my blog about how important it is to respect boundaries; my posts are absolutely prone to breaking those boundaries people have created for themselves. 

so i made my own, semi-vague post, letting my following know (and i’m pretty sure i’d answered asks about it before, but this is going to be long enough w/o me searching those up too) that i understood if they wanted to block me or unfollow or whatever - people need to create their own safe spaces. the tension is pretty clear in the tags, i’m not trying to hide that. i felt that the way this woman slid into my dm’s was pretty abrasive (just my opinion/how it made me personally feel) and i let myself be a lil emotional about it in the tags of my post.

alright! maybe this is the end. maybe we both go our separate ways and post happily on our own blogs... except it’s not the end. later in the day (some of this was happening like 1/2am, so now its Day day, i believe - again, not good w time passage lol)

clearly, i’m upset. my groupchat double checked that i didn’t get too emotional in my response - did i mention im anxious about discourse lol - and apparently.. it did the trick. she didn’t message me again. great. it was over. 

at this point, i decided i needed to make an even bigger change. so a few days after i’d calmed down i created an entirely new tag for my thirst posts so if people hadn’t already hidden the notsfw posts or just blocked me outright, they’d have a third option to escape the madness. at this point, id had my blog about 6? weeks, but there were still 2k posts for me to sift through - some of them were completely untagged. i also had to do it post by post, because one of xkits features - the mass re-tagger - was getting blogs deleted for some reason, and i wasn’t going to do that. so i spent a few days going through all 2k+ posts, adding the “fhg” tag. 

YEEHAW! a brand new tagging system, no more hopping into the bill hader tag (minus one or two really funny, not super explicit asks, like the bill hader farquaad meme), and, tbf, i’d completely put this woman out of my mind. i don’t seek out drama and do my best to stay in my lane. yesterday, i checked my activity for the first time in awhile since id put out a couple new original posts that had started to get traction and i Love reading tags. i noticed a mutual had @’d me, and realized i havent checked my @’s in...ever, maybe. i see a post from my good pal billhaderanti. 

since i dont follow them and never check my @’s, i’d completely missed it. however, once i did see it, i was horrified. id gone through all that fucking work to keep my blog My Blog and also respect everyone’s boundaries and it still hadn’t been enough. i’d been awake for almost 24 hours and went. a little crazy. and i didn’t reply immediately because i just had no words. i sent it to my friends because i... i just wasn’t going to be able to figure it out myself. 

there’s a lot to unpack in this post alone, but whatever, i’m gonna put my own grievances with the immaturity of 1. making a callout post to begin with when i’d been nothing but civil 2. making a callout post about something as (in the grand scheme of Life) minor as some tags where i refer to a someone’s genitals as a “whack pack” and 3. making a callout post in such a rude way - aside. at the end, she calls me (and whoever else!) a demonic mlw (man loving woman, we assumed, and then later confirmed with a post further back on her blog). 

which - yeah, we started scrolling. at first we were looking for more vague blogs, and then we just...started finding things. billhaderanti is a self proclaimed lesbian separatist, which... fine. but it’s already pretty clear that this woman hates me on some level simply because i am a bi woman (demonic mlw, remember!) which is just. damn man i can’t believe we are still fighting the biphobic fight lol. so the more we scrolled, the more we uncovered - and not just the biphobic / vaguely mtf transphobic things they posted (or put in tags), but we also found that they had their OWN thirst tags. certainly not as hyperbolically comedic as mine, but they were there, talking about his body and his person the same (and, frankly, a bit creepier for other reasons) as mine. 

there’s one post in particular that snatched my wig in it’s creepiness - and i say creepiness in the sense that it feels personal. like this woman feels like she knows bill to some degree where she can say these things. my tags have always had a sense of distance, as they’re written for humor. and maybe this particular post was written for comedic purposes, but it doesn’t read that way, and if it WAS, then she has no right to call ME out for MY comic tags and posts. 

i’ll let it speak for itself, mostly because i don’t want to read it again. 

i also won’t be going through her blog again to find the posts with biphobic and other Interesting:tm: tags because there are plenty and i just really! want to be done with the whole ordeal! her blog is public and i’m sure you can all find it and look to your heart’s content. 

feeling a bit feral and a bit pissed off now that we knew the depth of how rotten this woman’s vibes were, a couple of my pals made a post or two similar to what my tag’s are like except turned up to eleven (if possible) - and tagged them with “bill hader” (and notsfw!!). yes, a bit childish, but at this point, the entire situation was childish, and making jokes was truly the only way we were going to get through it. another vague post went up on her blog soon after.

talking down to us, calling us children, and then for whatever reason calling us virgins... whatever, weird post. around this time most of us (est) went to bed, because it was nearing 3 or 4 in the morning. 

and then today happened. i woke up fresh and ready for the day after a wonderful 4 hours of sleep and found that jane had made an incredibly intelligent post in response to the situation. i won’t ss it, but i’ll LINK in case you missed it. attached there in the reblog is my own response. i think they can speak for themselves. 

after that, things were kind of jumbled, since i wasn’t online a lot and when i was i was Not checking my activity simply because i was afraid of what i’d see. for the most part, it ended up just being support (which i am very grateful to all of you for - it means a lot that you all enjoy my content to any degree). 

there was some more vague posting from both “““““sides”””””” of the “““““argument”””””” - mostly just people restating the fact that this is a public space and we should All be aware of how we effect others. i still hadn’t heard directly from billhaderanti, so i assumed we’d all be dropping and disengaging and moving on. i still wasn’t blocked, though, so who really knew what would happen. 

eventually, it culminated in this last post. tw for mentions of rape

i’m going to start by saying that 

1. there are nearly no teenagers that were involved in this. im turning 23 in january and most of my friends are 20+. maybe one or two are 19. 

2. none of us sent any sexually violent asks - most of us didn’t send asks at all. i believe one or two of my friends admitted to sending asks however they assured me their nature wasn’t bad; as far as i know, everyone remained civil in whatever went on (again, unclear to me as to what was being sent; no one was actively posting or talking about it. if billhaderanti wishes to elaborate, they can, but i don’t have anything to put in). 

3. before i finish this, i would like to apologize to billhaderanti. as a comedian - not just my stupid tags, i mean in real life, too - i know that humor can hurt. it’s not always funny, it’s not just stupid hahas. sometimes things that are supposed to be jokes just hit people differently and cause bad things. i recognize that. i never meant to trigger you (if you’re reading this) or cause you any severe mental/emotional harm. i apologize for my humor bringing up your trauma, and i never meant for that. regardless of my own thoughts and opinions about the nature of my posts/the thirst tags themselves, they hurt you, and i’m sorry. 

anyway, i’m going to wrap this up (i’m bad at endings, what can i say! steven king and i took the same writer’s class!). if you read all this... sorry. i probably won’t be taking any asks about it, because i find the whole “drama” of this to be stupid and rooted in some seriously biphobic issues this fully grown woman has. 

tldr; i attempted to contain my blog so this woman could exist and function safely on her blog, but it wasn’t enough for her, so she called me out, and then some of the fandom called Her out for being biphobic and mean and overall just immature about the situation. as of now, she’s yet to block me, though her and her wife have blocked a few of my friends. her wife continues to clown on my friends. this post was made for clarity’s sake. the end, i’m getting a drink. 

[inserttemptitlehere]

An unasked for “moderate” take on TERFs v Trans rights

Nobody asked, I might get cancelled for this (probably by both sides), and honestly I don’t have much belief that this will even be read by many people. But it’s frustrating seeing people being condemned for reasonable fears and requests and I just feel the need to put my opinions out into the ether just to have them out there and so I can stop dwelling on them every time I see stuff like this happen again. 

Like, I just want to slap all the TERFs that purposefully misgender people and spout transphobic rhetoric. And I want to shake everyone who labels anything that complains about misogyny specific to cis women as TERF-y. God.

It seems like many “TERFs” are not actively malicious (although many definitely are), but are merely women who’ve been sexually assaulted or just been ground down by the patriarchy and are understandably (although not necessarily justifiably) scared/upset at the thought of any person with a male body coming into their safe spaces or into their fought for institutions. Whereas most trans people just want to live their lives and be accepted as the gender they identify as without wanting to cause any harm to anyone (although again, there are some they definitely do). 

I personally found much of JK Rowling’s recent essay to be fear mongering, but given that she suffered abuse from her husband I could understand and sympathize with why she had those fears even though I disagree with her conclusions about the actions society/government should take regarding them. I honestly just feel sad for her. I feel sad that the experiences she’s been through have made her so scared. I feel sad that despite the millions of dollars she’s donated to charity and work she’s done to make the world a better place she has now hurt so many people and this action will be what she’s remembered for. I feel sad that the extremely angry responses she’s gotten will most likely only solidify her fear and perpetuate her actions that will most likely cause more hurt for more people.

I’ll also say that her original tweet that sparked it all was valid! It is dehumanizing to reduce people to their genitals (ironically something people say TERFs do) and it erases the fact that almost all of these people are targeted because they are women. And it feels somewhat sexist as I’ve never seen an article refer to a certain group as “penis havers” or “semen producers”. I can, however, still see how it would be exclusive however to only refer to “people who menstruate” as “women”. A better wording would’ve been “women and trans men”. Because then no one would be left out. And don’t @ me about that somehow leaving out ‘trans women’, because guess what, there are cis women who don’t menstruate! If we can recognize that “Not all men” is a bad take, why on earth are we accepting “Not all women” as a correct one?

Look, not all cis women menstruate. Not all cis women can or do become pregnant. But we still label these as generic ‘women’s issues’ because they affect a large portion of women. But it should go both ways! I believe that makes the gross femininity trans women need to perform to qualify for hormones a ‘women’s issue’ and the difficulty of getting insurance to cover said hormones a ‘women’s issue’. Because they’re issues that affects a large portion of women. Heck, I know most Transmen find the fact that some TERFs include them in their feminism irritating, but I’m also fine with including specific issues affecting the ones that don’t feel that way as ‘feminist issues’.

I am 100% against misgendering people, am 100% supportive of including trans women’s specific issues as part of the overall fight to help women, and I will happily state “transwomen are women”. But, I do agree that there are a handful of cis women spaces/institutions that it becomes morally grey to accept transwomen into without any sort of provisions. Especially given the fact that if there were absolutely zero strings attached to legally identifying a certain way, then there are definitely cis people who would abuse the system. Personally, I don’t think we should completely structure our society based on these fears - although I can again understand the people who have not had as privileged of a life as I have feeling differently (even if I ultimately disagree with them).

Anyway my take on said spaces/institutions:

Bathrooms: Single parents of opposite sexed kids already use the opposite gendered bathroom to teach them how to use it (and should be allowed to). If a cis man wants to rape you in a bathroom that you’re alone in, I don’t think the societal norms are really going to stop him. And since trans people just want to use the bathroom in peace, let them. Maybe it’s because I’ve never felt comfortable peeing in public and thus never felt the bathroom to be a ‘safe space’, but I’ve never understood the argument against this.

Changing rooms: Go where you identify. If you start acting like a creep, then there should be some course of action to either get you banned or limit your access to said changing room. That policy should hold for cis or trans people.

Women’s support groups: Already made my opinion on this clear I hope. Although I will say that if talk about certain genitalia/bodily functions is triggering, it’s not right to shut down all discussion regarding those things for the other people there. Instead we should have, you know, trigger warnings so that everyone can either prepare themselves accordingly or leave the room and no one is triggered or feels like they are unable to talk about their issues.

Rape shelters: It is 100% valid for a cis woman that was a victim of rape to not want to share their space with someone with a working penis. If there is absolutely nothing that can be done to make said person feel safe, then it should be the right of the shelter to refuse long term stay to the person causing that issue (through no fault of their own) - although the shelter should do everything it can to make sure the trans woman has a place to stay/go. On the other hand, if a trans woman was already there before such a victim, it would not be right to toss out the trans woman to grant access to the cis woman who has the problem with them.

Sports: I personally don’t know enough of the science behind it, but it seems to me that bare minimum they shouldn’t be allowed to compete without doing hormone therapy. And even then the skeletal differences and remaining hormonal differences may still prevent things from being reasonably fair (although I wouldn’t know). It’s definitely not fair to let a trans person pre-hormones compete on the team their gender matches with. Honestly, in an ideal world we’d somehow have an objective way to sort sports into co-ed groups based on athletic ability similar to how weight classes work for wrestling.

Prisons: Non violent crime? Go where you identify. Violent crime? Sorry, gotta go based on your sex (unless you’ve had bottom surgery). It is immoral to lock a convicted rapist with a penis in a cell with women who have no way of getting away from them. I mean, maybe we could have ‘wings’ for trans people so they could go to the prison they identify as and they’d just have separate cells. But until that becomes the norm, the few violent trans criminals should not be allowed to go where they identify.

Kids: Not an institution, but definitely a hot topic. Personally, I think only puberty blockers until they hit adulthood and extensive therapy to make sure that they are in fact trans. Admittedly JK Rowling’s essay about this bit sounded a bit like, “The spooky trans cult is coming for your neurodivergent and gay children!” But it did have small feeling of truth to it as well. As a GNC, cis, autistic woman who had dysphoria as a teen I also worry that I might have been incorrectly diagnosed as trans if I’d been born later. But I don’t think it’s something we as a society need to be extremely worried about or use as an excuse to make things harder on trans kids and adults. We just need to make sure that kids get the therapy they need to sort out whether they’re trans or just having the common dysphoria you have as a teen and chafing against gender roles. We can rubber stamp adults if they want, it’s only kids that should have to go through some minor hoops.

Finally, on being “Gender Critical”. I have to say, the idea of smashing the concept of gender and everybody just living as they are with no societal expectations for them to be one way or another based loosely on their biological sex sounds wonderful. I’m just upset that so many who support this concept are so transphobic because technically in that future there would be no ‘trans’ people (except those that suffer dysphoria) and they feel this gives them the right to act horribly towards trans people. I did recently talk to some TRAs who explained to me that, unlike ‘Gender Critical’ proponents, their ‘gender’ model is split into multiple components. That you’ve got your biological sex (your parts), your gender identity (what you feel you are), your gender presentation (how you dress and act), and gender roles (how society expects you to act based on your gender). So it seems to me, that we can still reach a version of that wonderful future that doesn’t erase people. Smashing gender roles and the idea that there is a ‘correct’ way to present as a gender would achieve ‘female liberation’ while still allowing for people who still desire to identify a certain way. We shouldn’t completely do away with gender, just the things that society expects from it. 

[zackmephisto]

dirt watches aew

ITS TIME BITCHEZ

stop i don't want to see this betrayal :(

mjf turned and now my depression is Worse i hate him i love him :(

JURASSIC EXPRESS AAAAAA

N Y L A YES OG MY GOD

i know I didnt hear yall boo nyla.

HANGMAN AND PAC REEEE

SCUUUUU REEEEE

M I S T E R M O X L E Y

:'''''(

STOP IM GONNA CRY KENNY NOOO

is it really nakazawa v mox. that's wild

mox looks good wtf?

STOP pulling the crazy shit dude. hes a good boy.

is he wrestling in pants bc his legs got fucked up or

that was weak. wtf ?

is it just bc hes still sort of hurt and they want to book him stronger than kenny?

o he speak

"you are one radical son of a bitch" how come he can say bitch but chuck cant say the s word

👀

damn yeah what's next for him. he really did fuck up kenny. who is next. I'm excited idc who is next like.... whoever it is they're gonna be working w the best of the best tbh

wait what the fuck why is it a championship match with sammy and chris and scu. why

cheer dark order and their gimp army you FUCKING cowards

T H E M!!!!!

GOD I LOVE MY CHILDREN STOP IM GONNA CRY MARKO WEARING THE MASK

THE MARKO CHANTS THANK YOU LORD

i have no more will to live now that marko ate the pin

STOP BEFORE I CRY FOR REAL

oH MY GOD LUCHASAURUS AAAA

luchasuarus said "back off my baby dinosaurs" and i respect that

hes obv still a little hurt tho you can see it in his movement

I STAN ONE DINOSAUR FAMILY

hmmm how come scu have to defend their championships every five minutes but chris jericho is always safe 🤔

gfys shawn spears

i'm a simple woman. i see shawn spears on my screen and I switch tabs

I constantly thank god for darby allin

Aubrey 😍😍😍😍

if darby loses i sue

JOEY!!!

uh. i mean. i mean. joey. big deal. who even cares about him and his braids and he smells anyway 😡

thank u darby i love you and definitely not joey...

DARBY AND JON WAIT STOP I CANT BREATHE OH MY GOD NO PLEASE THIS IS GONNA BE THE BEST THING IVE EVER SEEN SCREEEEEE

I'm literally screeching darby vs mox??? NAME A MORE ICONIC DUO

ya'll have a crowd full on transphobes huh

darby vs mox tho this is so goddamn exciting

SO excited oh my god who is nyla fighting !!

who??

people really are such big transphobes that they're cheering someone who hasn't had a match yet. i hate straighties

thank you queen I love you

get well soon dad i miss u :(

i feel like i should know her by sight but i don't

o i remember her. i like her merch

shes annoying

😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

AWESOME KONG AND BRANDI MY SKIN IS CLEARING AS I SPEAK

perish, blonde woman

god i love this. i LOVE THIS

if mjf joins the inner circle i want it to be known right now at 5:56 pm that i will Still Stan. okay. i stood w baron corbin through it all. i'll stand by mjf through it all.

every time some one swears on aew and it's not chuck taylor i lose six months of my life

OH?!?!?!

HELLO MAX I LOVE YOU GOOD MORNING MY SWEET SCARF SON

he's handsome no one @ me ever again

i lov u asshole love you so much

LOVE YOUUUU

NO I LOVE YOU I'M NOT UPSET I LOVE YOU

expose him Max EXPOSE HIM

max 😍😍😍😍😍

I believe every word you've ever said ever

max is right stop SAYING MEAN THINGS TO HIM

THIS MAN IS HURT MAY I HUG HIM

max STOP I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU SO MUCH

AND WHAT A HANDSOME NEW FACE IT IS

YES YOU ARE BETTER THAN HIM AND I DO KNOW IT

wake up sheeple max is RIGHT

"my third or fourth installment" go off king.. go off......

sigh. I didnt want to do this. but i'm gonna have to stan.

or not?

MAX SAID A LITTLE BIT OF THE BUBBLY AND I IMMEDIATELY GOT UP TO GRAB THE CHAMPAGNE I SAVED FOR THIS EXACT SITUATION

ok thank god i dont have to stan the inner circle

thanks max i love you

HE IS HANDSOME ITS TRUE

ok... maybe that was funny. but I still love max

dont do this Max I dont want to stan

this is making me laugh hella hard dncnsndj

I LOVE THE HUG

cody man come on just let me have my max in peace

sigh

cmon Maxwell let's go

who?

wardlow I see

ok. I stan if he likes max

@ Maxwell Jacob Friedman choke me like that d*ddy

good morning it's been an hour and I've had four mikes and am on my fifth i'm drunk and in love with mjf

cowboy 😍😍😍😍😍

wait please don't let hangman lose I dont want to see him sad anymore

pac is fucking. more than human. I love him too

COW👏BOY👏SHIT👏

"i'm shocked by pac's leg strength" me 2 bud. those legs? i'm always shocked. hes so ripped his muscles have muscles

BASTARD SHIT LMFAOO HOW THE TURNS HABE TABLED

COWBOY STOP MAKING THESE NOISES I FEEL NSFWORK

yall are going to commercial in the middle of this match? disgostang. guess its valid bc this alcohol is going right thru me but. >:(

so Twitter says luchasaurus is actually Back back I'm really really happy abt that I missed dinosaur father

i finished going to the bathroom and sat down and it came back on clearly this is dirt rights

hangman and pac didnt get up for a second and I was Ben Affleck w cigarette. jpeg for a second thinking abt pac vs moxley

thank u for being a good bean mr ref bryce

:(((((((((((((((((((((

suing aew for emotional distress

JESUS matt Jackson

OH MY GOD AAAAAA ORANGE IVE NEVER LOVED A MAN MORE

literally I love orange cassidy more than i love myself

I'd be more exciting for this bucks/proud n powerful moment if orange cassidy wasn't on screen for two (2) seconds. His Impact

aew refs are my new mandatory kin

dont hurt Brandon Cutler hes a good boy

:(

thank god for private party

proud n powerful vs private party is dirt rights

me: :l

scu: SCUUUUU

me: :)

oh yeah btw my onion on scu officially changed i love them officially

SCU SAYS FUCK NASHVILLE BUT I LOVE WRESTLING FANS AND REALLY THATS CALIFORNIANS IN A NUTSHELL, I CAN CONFIRM, BEING CALIFORNIAN

i'm DRUNK thank god for autocorrect

why is sammy not vlogging. is he okay. does he have a fever

anyway if scu loses i'm suing again

jericho, a few weeks ago: WHO WEARS A SCARF

Jericho, today: wears a scarf tonight and talks abt scarfs today

judas FUCKS one of my fave songs of all time tbh

sammy guevara is like. 12. stop hip thrusting, child

kaz, my angel. I love you. so much

sammy: I GOT EM, DAD. I GOT EM

I love sammy BUT he better eat this pin so hard hes still tasting it next week

almost started filing my aew lawsuit when scorpio sky almost got pinned

I love how effective and strong the thesz press is. so wild. thank u mr sky

oh thank fuck. thank FUCK that pin wasn't complete

PLEASE MR SKY

THANK YOU MR SKY

SCU BEAT INNER CIRCLE SO NO ONE EVER TALK SHIT ABT CALIFORNIANS EVER AGAIN

unless ur californian. in which case ur allowed

scorpio sky being the first person in aew to pin Jericho is California Rights

that was a wonderful show. orange cassidy was there so it was 10/10. everyone say thank u aew

[gulliblepineapples]

HAHA saw ur post to ur bitchass friend about coming to argue with u instead Didn’t they have to comfort u for that one thing my other nonny nigga sent u lmfaooooo Ur an actual joke how u gonna argue when u cry so easy😂💀 Ight let’s argue then. ya’ll weird for bending niggas genders and sexualities for ur own gain and still call me weird for calling u out 😂😂 ok hoe Main mans in zombies ain’t gay u lot just got problems LMFAO try not to get triggered 💀

Firstly Anon, no, I didn’t ‘have’ to be comforted. People are just kind and polite and wish for others to be happy, unlike you. I’ve honestly seen children with better grammar and spelling than you. Do you even see what you’re saying? You sound so immature. I like to keep this blog as… friendly as possible, but if you think I’m going to keep being polite to you, little child, you’re terribly wrong. Now! Let’s begin dissecting your awful Ask.

1) “saw ur post to ur *i won’t repeat that word* friend” First up, don’t call my friend that. Are you just upset they argued with you? Are you upset you couldn’t think of a good response to them? :) Good. I hope you are upset. I like to be polite to people but you, Anon, deserve to be upset.

2) “how u gonna argue when u cry so easy😂💀” Second thing: emojis. Ohhh dear. The laughing emoji. A sign of immaturity when used in arguments. Also ‘nonny’, people are allowed to cry. Anyone can cry. It’s not weak or silly. It’s human. I’m terribly sorry you obviously grew up with the idea that crying is ‘weak’, it’s obviously really messed up how you deal with your emotions.

3) “lght” Thirdly, were you trying to say ‘alright’ or something? Because ‘lght’ isn’t a word, look it up in a dictionary.

4) “for ur own gain” Nobody ever said it was for their ‘own gain’. But, seeing the way you act, I’m guessing you probably hate all kinds of LGBT+ representation, so there’s no real purpose in arguing over this, because you obviously won’t listen. You’ve already decided on an opinion, and you refuse to change it.

5) “calling u out 😂😂” Oh my gosh, this just keeps getting better and better.. Again! Back to point 2: Emojis. Immature when used in arguments. Also, ‘calling u out’…You have really done nothing of the sort. If anything, you’ve just given my opinions more support. ‘Call out’ posts are supposed to do the opposite, they’re supposed to take away support due to the person being awful.

6) “ain’t gay u lot just got problems” Is this Ask almost over yet? I’m getting bored. As mentioned in point 4: You probably hate LGBT+ representation so there’s just no point arguing over this.

7) “try not to get triggered 💀” Oh, and now you finish the Ask with a term you shouldn’t use in this context! Wow, you’ve just gone full force on the offensiveness, huh? :) And, seeing your thing about “my other nonny  *i won’t repeat that word* sent u” I’m guessing you mean the incredibly transphobic and homophobic Ask they sent? I reported that and IP blocked them so.. Yeah, you don’t have their support against me any more.

Anon, you know what? This is your last chance. Because honestly, I’m bored. I’m bored of you repeating yourself with the immaturity. You have 1 more chance to be mature and act like an adult. I’m allowing you to send ONE more Ask, so, make it worthwhile. If the Ask shows no signs of maturity or respect for the opinions of others, I will report you and IP block you. Now, perhaps you could make your last Ask seem mature by not hiding as Anonymous any more. Perhaps you could stop being scared and truly fight for your opinion, as everyone else has been doing. Last chance, Anon.

I do not hope you have a nice day, but I am patiently awaiting your response.

Yours truly,

Gullible Pineapples.

[totallyfrandom]

So, my Christmas is sure... different. And it’s only part one of two. The celebration continues tomorrow with yet another Christmas lunch at sister’s house, but this time my mom and her dad will be joining us instead of dad and uncle (who ate with us today).

To make it short: we had some good food, a bit dry because she didn’t have any sauce. Later we had coffee and cake, then my two siblings played a board game (I didn’t want to join because it’s not my type of game) and finally we watched “Lego Batman” on Netflix. I’ve watched it before but it was a long time ago so I barely remembered it... also I’ve forgotten how emotional it was at the end. After that dad drove home with brother and me on board. I thought I might as well spend the night at dad’s place as per usual tradition (and I have another opportunity to pack more of my stuff from my old room to my apartment).

Now, the emotional stuff... I’m not a big fan of this different take on Christmas. Sure, sister got a Christmas Tree (that we siblings decorated last Thursday) but no TV so we didn’t have the traditional Swedish Donald Duck Christmas TV program. The food was similar, but something felt out of place... maybe it’s just because it’s not at dad’s place. No Christmas presents being exchanged or under the Christmas Tree, instead we open them before going to sister for lunch. I opened mine in the morning because there’s no point in taking them to my sister’s or dad’s place when I’m gonna get home with more than I came with.

When dad drove us to his house and he turned his car to familiar streets in my hometown... or more like childhood town... my heart felt heavy with sadness. It was dark outside but the snow lighted up the path a bit from all the Christmas lights, the lamp poles and car lights; every street we drove on gave me quick flashbacks to my childhood when I walked or biked on those same streets. It could be to or from a friend’s place, to or from school or to or from the local shop. I was so used to see the same scenery almost every day back then I didn’t think much of it but now I come to appreciate it. In that very moment, while sitting in the car and we soon approached dad’s place, I really missed the past of a joyous childhood Christmas and the childhood in my hometown in general. I miss my old hometown. I almost cried but I tried to resist it as I don’t want my brother or dad noticing it. But even when I miss my old hometown, there’s not much left for me as time changes a part of it. I kinda want to live there again but I know I can’t (it’s not very practical) and I really don’t want to go back living with dad and brother again. Dad is pretty horrible in various ways and I’ll explain why later. So when I stepped into the house it’s the same mess as usual. Dad also said that he “cleaned up my room a bit” for my arrival and I thought he removed all the newspapers and magazines that he dumped into my room some time after I moved out, but no. He just removed the piles of dump from my bed so I could sleep there but there are many piles of dump and other old stuff on my floor tjat fill almost half my room. Also he has no Christmas Tree this year (sister is the one who used to pep-talk him into it every year but she didn’t care this year which made dad not caring either) so there’s barely any Christmas Spirit in his house... just the same old sad mess that I had to live with for a few years (minus the dump)

Now to the more... controversial stuff. While we were socializing at sister’s place after lunch, I started an innocent conversation that quickly developed further and turned out... awful. Not dramatic but I was shocked and upset. Basically it was finally revealed that my dad and uncle don’t like the gender-neutral pronoun for “them” (or “hen” in Swedish) and claim that “Swedes are stupid” (because Swedes came up with “hen” as gender-neutral pronoun) and even worse, they said that “If they [the non-binary/trans people] want to call themselves “hen” instead of “she” or “he” then something’s wrong with their head”. Newsflash: my uncle and dad are sexists (or it it transphobia?)! And when sister and I try to shut them down with their horrible talk dad countered with “I just said my opinion”. WTF?! There’s a difference between expressing an opinion and saying something that would hurt a minority group, like sexist or transphobic shit. If you can’t say something that isn’t deemed as sexist/transphobic or anything hurtful to specific groups, then you should just shut up. I also hate it that while we were having coffee and cake, uncle and dad kept making jokes and childishly playing around by saying “That’s offensive!” to non-related and non-offensive stuff just to have some laughs at the recent heated moment about what “shouldn’t be so bad” about their opinions, as if it was no big deal. Dad also kept making fun out of Romani people by using a slur (in Swedish) for them to make a joke, despite my sister has previously lectured him at least twice before that he should use the term “Romani”. But instead, he corrects himself with “The traveling folks”, which is not as awful way to describe them but still it doesn’t cost him anything to just say “Romani”. Even when we correct him he doesn’t apologize or correct himself properly (like as if he just don’t want to say it), but instead makes a “funny misheard” pun out of it. He should seriously drop his offensive shit that he uses for his “humor”. It’s not funny. My sister was clearly irritated at them but I had enough of it and literally told them to stop and said a semi-calm but stern “Enough!” Then no more controversial jokes were made, as if they finally got the point of dropping it like proper adults. Good riddance! It’s ridiculous that my uncle and dad act like children while sister and I have to be the adults (ok we are adults in our 30s but it seemed like we acted more proper adults than those two grown-ass past middle-aged men).

So not only is my dad emotionally and psychically abusive with low skills in talking about feelings and general communication with me, but he’s sexist/transphobic (and prejudice against the Romani people) as well! No wonder I can never talk to him about my opinions or express my feelings. Now, I’m cishet but I’m an ally and I support any friends who are LGBT and if any of my friends or just ANYONE, even strangers, want to be referred as “they/them” then I bloody respect that! So why can’t dad? I’ve already lost much respect to him, now he made me lose some more. What a disappointment... and here I thought I was a disappointment. But at least I have a strong moral compass with an open mind, something that dad apparently lacks.

Well... this was cheerful for Christmas holidays... sorry about that. A lot has been going on in my mind recently. Despite the good food, I just don’t feel well emotionally this Christmas, considering everything that happened in a short time span. I’m not really ready to meet mom tomorrow but here we go I guess.

I can’t wait to come back home on the evening of Christmas Day to have some alone-time with my coping mechanisms.

[tumblunni]

Oh fuck i cant stand this

Ive already almost used up my damn mobile data again and i only bought it yesterday. Fuck i want to go home. You guys are like the only comfort i have here and i dunno what im gonna do when i cant message you again

Fuckin hell stupid shit day! I was supposed to go to a therapy class thing today but the stupid bus went past where my abusive father lives and i had a MASSIVE FREAKOUT and had to go home and then ofcourse to go home you have to go back on the stupid same bus!! I fuckib failed and wasted the doctor's time and he had to grab me to stop me from running off the bus crying and back to fuckin hell dad's house because im shit and i deserve everything he ever did to me

AND THEN fuckin same doctor continues the relentless constant tide of everyone misgendering me and making crass transphobic jokes

"You see you've gotta understand the other opinion" he says, as if trans people werent fuckin raised SURROUNDED by cis people's predjudiced opinion of us and taught it was fact. As if it didnt take me SO MUCH WORK to even become confident enough to stand up for myself! I've gotta see the 'other opinion' that "yknow well families and children use public bathrooms and theyre scared trans people will molest their children so its understandable they want to kick you out or even act violent to you". Yknow the OTHER OPINION that MY OPINION DOESNT MATTER and also MY ENTIRE EXISTANCE IS A CRIME but i'm the one being predjudiced for not accepting that OPINION, right?! Im here trying to tell him that no that isnt rational because there have been LITERALLY NO RECORDED CASES of trans people molesting children in public bathrooms, or even "evil men faking being trans" to do the same thing. There's been more cases of actual cis men breaking into women's bathrooms to drag women out for merely LOOKING trans. More cis women have been harassed because of anti trans laws than they ever did before! But hey "respect that other opinion", right? And also "at least its not as bad as russia" and "but gay pride is everywhere now, that one footballer had rainbow shoelaces." Hey wow i never noticed that not only was homophobia totally over but also transphobia was remotely related to that! Wow! I seriously had to bring out the fuckin 1600s historical investigation on pre-british olde englishe that showed the existance of a gender neutral pronoun before the word "he" ever existed, and the existance of transgender pride and pronoun discussions in the 1800s before the word transgender was even popularized. I cant believe i fuckin had to do a 'show your sources that queer people existed before the internet' IN REAL LIFE. WITH A MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL. I can point at the damn NHS website but nooooo!

Oh and yknow what got me the most? YKNOW WHAT GOT ME THE MOST?? "We have sick people here, you cant expect them to remember stuff like that. Dont ruin their recovery by bringing up stuff like that." Like..fuckin..IM A FUCKIN PATIENT TOO. I wasnt even asking the other patients to stop hurting me i was asking you the staff to maybe consider it! And seriously you want me to be so super ultra perpetually prepared and perpetually rational and able to keep my existance secret and out of every conversation yet theyre too ill to learn about lgbt people existing? Just a sentence would be too painful? And me living every day being misgendered doesnt impact my ability to recover at all, eh? Fuckin shitting fuck hell.

And i hate it i HATE IT because he's being nice so i'll be the bad guy if i complain. Likehe fuckin..doesnt even know he's being rude and doesnt want to consider the idea. He says 'i dont like your tone' if i suggest the concept and FUCK in that moment i was so fuckin scared he was gonna hit me like my dad did. Or at tge very least kick me out of the hospital if i dont cooperate with him. He just fuckin..thinks he's perfectly unbiased and accepts everyone and "oh but i like to make fun of everyone equally". And i even fuckin raised the subject that people who say that often only make fun of minorities and never themselves, the majority, or major power structures. And he's just like 'yeah yeh i hate people like that'. Whoosh. Rigjt over the head. God i wasnt even TRYING to be passive aggressive i was trying tk outright tell him why what he said was upsetting me but NOPE. Trying to explain how its just so hard and tiring to have to verrrrrry patientlyyyyy explain yourself to EVERYONE EVERY DAY CONSTANTLY while they sling loads of rude words at you and it should be just allowed because they 'dont know better'. Like you ask me to educate you but at the same time im rude if i actually tell you?? And god i also tried to explain how the fuckin bathroom violence thing isnt an example of 'educating another opinion' AGAIN by saying like... If someone just asked me to explain being transgender i would. If someone just said they were uncomfortable i would leave. That's 'another opinion'. Reacting with slurs and violence to a trans person existing and not doing anything to you is not 'another opinion' and its not someone who 'just didnt know'. He was seriously trying to argue that it WASNT BIGOTED it was just someone rationally being afraid for their children because of a danger that doesnt exist, and rationally reacting with extreme violence rather than doing anything else. Rationally. RATIONALLY. oh just MISTAKENLY committing a hate crime! Cos they just didnt know trans people exist! Not cos they hate us! Oh no! Yeah sure we totally have a fucking DUTY to educate these POOR UNKNOWING PEOPLE while theyre attacking us, and its our damn fault if we didnt...

And just fucking FUCK i hate how someone can say all that stuff and still be "nice" and still not hate me personally? Like its so messed up?? He's not anti trans or anything he just has so much more damn sympathy for cis people than trans people, and puts all the onus on us to somehow prevent our own murders. And he thinks that "i dont have a problem with trans people" means doing LITERALLY NOTHING to change your behaviour to make trans people feel accepted. They should just magically know that your jokes are jokes when theyre surrounded by so many people saying it honestly, in CONSTANT FEAR OF THAT EXACT THING LEADING TO VIOLENCE. And like in order to be "a guy who has no problem with trans people" he has to do nothing, while in order for me to be not bigoted against HIM it means i have to never get offended by his jokes and also never talk about myself and also constantly educate him about things because he doesnt want to learn, even though he works in a hospital thats supposed to have an anti discrimination policy. Like fuckin just NOT HURTING LGBT PEOPLE doesnt make you discrimination free, shit like telling me to misgender myself because my pronouns would confuse the other patients is kinda fuckin fucked up. Also "that's a question for later" is all i CONSTANTLY get when it comes to talking about legal name changes or therapy or even just talking to an lgbt support group. I have to wait until i stop being depressed because oh no im talking about too many mental illnesses at once. Its been seven years and i havent fuckin stopped being depressed, bitch! Ever consider a fuckin symptom of gender dysphoria is a big ol fat depression!!! And just gahhhhh he was so fuckin baffled and angry that i would dare to get emotional about the subject?? Like he just saw DEBATING WHETHER TRANS PEOPLE ARE REAL and WHETHER PEOPLE WHO MURDER THEM FOR USING THE BATHROOM ARE JUSTIFIED as a perfectly normal casual discussion that a Non Transphobic Man could have with his transgender friend. Why oh why would i cry about this casual hypothetical discussion? Hey its not like it fuckin affects me directly! "Well its never happened to you right?" A Ha Ha Ha Ha. Also fuckin "so which bathroom do you use?" and "well you're not really transgender if youre not getting the surgery-oh wait you do want the surgery? How does that work then?" I swear i could just see the gears turning in his head and he was about to say "do you want both down there". Gahhhhhh *cringes myself into a tiny tumbleweed and blows away*

Also the entire time he kept calling being trans a sexuality and also asexuality. "No youre not trans youre asexual right?" Yeah sure ive just been saying im trans and saying im not a girl and wearing a chest binder and talking this entire conversation about my experiences as a trans person in public bathrooms just to pull an elaborate prank on you. And like i know what he meant is that he thought the word for nonbinary was asexual (has asexuality REALLY made so little progress towards getting into the sex ed curriculum in the entire 25 years of my life?) But like seriously he was like "youre not really trans if youre nonbinary". And then fuck dude i dont wanna explain how surgery works to you!! And especially not also my entirely unrelated sexuality that has entirely different equally upsetting predjudices!

Ans gahhhh fuck i just got no sympathy for crying and he acted as if it was just some wildly unexpected occurance he never could have predicted. And i hate it cos he's nice to me whenever the subject is about anything else. I cant get any symoathey from ANYONE because he's A NICE GUY and why dont i just understaaaaaand other opinionnnnnns

I wanted to fuckin quit this whole thing on the spot and go home. Only reason i cant is because my support worker is off work until thursday auauauaughhh

Fuck at least one positive i guess is that ive made progress in the social anxiety or at least gotten better at giving the impression im making progress. Cos i want to LEAVE AS FAST AS POSSIBLE. And also fuck all my other worries seem less suicide-inducing when im actually getting the closest ive ever been to killing myself on a daily basis because of a stupid other thing that i never could have predicted. Go here for one form of self hate, come home with another! Yayyyyy

And fuck i havent even made a single bit of progress on drawing or writing anything and i cant practise making ganes cos my laptop cant run rpgmaker and i havent even started reading my giant pile of books cos they fuckin LOOK THROUGH THE WINDOW EVERY SINGLE HOUR TO MAKE SURE YOU AINT KILLED YOURSELF. i have no fuckin pribacy and its making me wanna kill myself even more!! I just live constantly on edge looking at the fuckin door window and i cant even do anything to distract myself because im too scared of them looking at me!! Or barging in at no notice to tell me i have to do some big stressful thing RIGHT NOW because i dont even get advance notice of anything aaaa! And fuck i dont have anywhere to go to even calm down from a panic attack cos i have no privacy so at least im getting over being scared of going outside cos outside is the only place i can go to cry. Fuckin strangers in the crowd at least wont cause shit if they see me.

Fuck i want to go home. Fuck i wish i had enough money to keep buying mobile internet. Its like fuckin 750mb a day to run tumblr but its all ive got to talk to any person who doesnt hate me or patronize me or think im faking a bunch of shit or whatever the fuck. And im not even any fun to be around when im like this so im probably just ruining your day too. And im probably gonna vanish again soon and then just go back to crying alone and getting worse and probably never being able to leave

I knew it was gonna be stressdul but i didnt predict any of this.. I just wanna fuckin die. I wanted to jump out the car and go to my old dad's house and have him pull open the door and slap me around a bit. Like call me a fucking dyke, call me a sick retard, be honest about your feelings! I'd fuckin take being abused over this "oh youre the bad one for being mad because i had goooood intentions" reverse psychology bigotry from hell. Either these people are evil geniuses or theyre even more stupid like me. Fuckin shit dad please manifest in my room and slap me, killing me instantly. I feel like being scared of you would at least be a faster emotion than this nebulous sensation of confusing unease and dysphoria 24/7 for 6 fuckin months. One week done, haha! Hahahabahahahahahahahahahahahahshahahahahahshshshahshahahahhahahaaaa

[freedom-of-fanfic]

Hey I know you have like a lot of asks right now but your explanation of why antis consider like 18+ ppl to still be children was really well said and so I was wondering about your thoughts on some antis' tendency to start arguments but then completely stop being civil at some point and throw discussion out the window in favor of insults and witty tumblrisms a la "pee your pants". Like, I guess I'm just curious as to why they insist that some people aren't worthy of having opinions??? :/

I’m glad you felt I expressed myself well in that post. :) Thank you!

There’s kind of 2 different questions going on here.

question 1: what are [my] thoughts on some antis’ tendency to start arguments but then completely stop being civil at some point and throw discussion out the window in favor of insults […]

in my experience, this mostly happens when antis get frustrated with an exchange:

anger because the anti has exhausted their arguments but the person they’re arguing with hasn’t exhausted theirs

alternatively: they used an appeal to emotion as a trump card and the person they are arguing with isn’t cowed into silence

fear because the person they’re arguing with brings up - or potentially brings up - good points that requires the anti-shipper to examine their reasoning

hurt because the conversation brings up something that touches a nerve/personal hurt to a greater degree than expected

They want out of the debate immediately, but letting someone else have the last word can really feel like losing, so they close by either repeating their previous argument almost verbatim or by a volley of insults and personal attacks before blocking.

The longest exchange I’ve had with an anti-shipper before this breakdown happened is two responses. (I’ve also dropped arguments myself when an anti uses their personal experience as evidence against me because it would only bring us both unproductive pain to discuss it.)

question 2: I’m just curious as to why [antis] insist that some people aren’t worthy of having opinions??? :/

the long explanation: Because it’s not possible to have multiple valid opinions when your worldview is black & white. Antis are the only ones who are right. To prevent other opinions from being valid, their sources must be discredited.

for someone deep in anti-shipping subculture, only fellow antis are good people who truly understand the relationship between fiction, reality, and the moral underpinnings of society. Only anti-shippers respect how extremely dangerous unwholesome fiction really is, and everyone else, by not comprehending the extremity of this threat, is enabling or perpetuating harm.  In this mindset, there aren’t really ‘opinions’ - just ‘people who are right (fellow antis)’ and ‘people who are wrong (everyone else)’. It’s not really about being ‘worthy’: it’s just that the opinion of outsiders, by virtue of being the opinion of an outsider, is automatically wrong, ignorant, and dangerous, and must be instantly discarded.

However, many anti-shippers don’t entirely perceive an insider/outsider dynamic at work. Like many cult-ish movements, anti-shippers justify this hostility towards outsiders/outsider opinions by perpetuating an oppressed/oppressor narrative, wherein the divide between oppressor and oppressed lies on axes of marginalization and/or victim status*.  Outsiders are all oppressors (non-marginalized/non-survivors)** ignorantly or purposely harming the oppressed (marginalized people/survivors). Anti-shippers are both oppressed themselves and the only defenders of oppressed people. 

(*The insidious part is, of course, that social oppression does lie along these axes, but anti-shippers misappropriate the mechanisms of oppression heavily to victimize themselves here. (It makes them harder to argue with.) )

(**ignorant (and thus anti-sj), white (and thus racist), cis (and thus transphobic), straight (and thus anti-LGBT+/an invader of LGBT+ spaces), able-bodied (and thus hates disabled people), neurotypical (and thus afraid of/hates aneurotypical/mentally ill people), and not traumatized (and in fandom circles, a woman (and thus a fetishizer)). )

It upsets an anti-shipper’s worldview when someone arguing with them doesn’t fit this image: hence ‘if you disagree with me and say you’re [marginalized/a survivor], you’re lying’.  Another variant on this is ‘you ship [bad ship], therefore your opinion is invalid.’ the implication is: if you ship something bad, you cannot possibly be marginalized/a survivor, and therefore you must be privileged, and therefore you are an ignorant asshole, and thus your opinion doesn’t count.

the short explanation: outside opinions are terrifying because anti culture social structures rely on everyone within having homogeneous thought patterns - that is, absolute agreement with one another on the rightness of The Cause and everything done in The Cause’s name. Giving outside opinions validity threatens that unwavering agreement and can lead down a slippery slope: losing dedication and loyalty and increasing the risk of falling out of step, losing favor, being abandoned by the anti-shipping social circle, and facing the possibility that things done in the name of The Cause weren’t actually as justifiable as once believed.

To be absolutely clear, the majority of anti-shippers don’t perceive the insider/outsider dynamic at all, but honestly believe they are protecting the oppressed masses (children, survivors, LGBT+ people, etc) from the ‘privileged’ people using ‘their’ stories for fictional enjoyment. It is equally self-delusion and an effort to deceive outsiders in order to maintain belief in their goodness/justice, and that’s why they must discredit or ignore anyone who doesn’t fit this narrative.

[fidelishaereticus]

some thoughts on sexism and how we talk about it. (this got kinda long, sorry, i tried not to post it)

Can we kill this debate that’s like “Women are Good and Pure and Never Hurt Each Other and All Men are Abusive Monsters” versus “Men are All Good, All Soft Soft Beautiful Boys Incapable of Harm, Sexism Must Be A Conspiracy of Cartographers (read: If Women Are Still Oppressed It’s Their Own Dam Fault)” ? 

can we kill it? canwecanwe pleeeease??

because both extremes are just so obviously wrong and yet i see people going out of their way to die on these hills every day. people taking any benign post that’s like “ugh i hate having to experience sexism as a woman, really throws off my groove” and interpreting it as An Attack on All Men. Or, on the other end, people ASSUMING that a person (or character) is gonna be a gross sexist abuser just because they’re a man. 

So on the one hand, we’ve got the Reactionary Gender Defense Squad for Men being all outraged at the slightest suggestion that the sexism in our society is the responsibility of any men ever (like “hey girls if you’re experiencing sexism, remember it’s your own damn fault or maybe the fault of your female friends, but certainly not the fault of any men. remember! men are all Pure and Good.  its the Perfect Gender :D”). (<—i s2g every time i read a post implying this i strangle the air like. please stop. please. yes girls can be sexist too, but please stop casually blaming women for their own experience of sexism, it is ….very rude and upsetting)

On the other hand, heaven forbid we recognize how, even in the most sexist of cultures, men women are all individuals who exist beyond the categories of “oppressor” and “oppressed”. Yes, some women do in fact espouse and perpetrate sexism. Some women are abusers. And some men are truly gentle and harmless and kind; some men find themselves in situations where they may experience disadvantages (non-structural sexism, if you will) on account of their sex (kinda like how a white person in america can be bullied for their whiteness by a group of black peers, and it really can hurt them, and it is real bullying and a real problem in that situation, even while lacking the clout of Structural Racism).  So (this is a delicate point) while it is extremely understandable that oppressed classes be distrustful of oppressor classes, many of us are in situations where we are capable of transcending a strictly survivalist mentality. We can understand situational complexities and evaluate individuals as whole people rather than judging them by crude categories. And those of us who have the mental energy to do that….should? Yes, rage is cathartic, and sometimes a very important part of healing and fighting back. And god knows reactionary ideologies and hyperboles can be good cheeky fun and also a part of healing / combatting the drudgery of being oppressed (i meanbcatch me flippantly yelling things like FUCK THIS HET BULLSHIT and HELLO NAUGHTY CHILDREN GENDER IS CANCELLED 8D on the regular). But it can go too far. Sometimes, we slip into deliberately espousing rage and digging our heals hard into catchy reactionary ideologies and making snap-judgements and wide sweeping statements about other groups more because it’s easy and “the cool thing to do” than because it’s helpful or healing. Like…maybe we just do it because group mentality takes hold, and that’s gratifying and secure, and we feel righteous doing it, and idk this is just a thing humans do (forge reactionary ideologies around group identities and then fling them at eachother like grenades)? It’s natural, and to an extent inevitable, be we can catch ourselves, we can apologize where we have hurt, we can do better. So yeah, idk, as an afab, agender individual, i fucking hate that sexism exists, i hate it every goddamn day, and yeah it kinda fucked me up a little, its probably a huge part of why I’m agender*, but i personally am not suffering SO MUCH that i need to take it out in blind rage on every man i encounter. So I don’t, not even online. Because guess what? That guy who sits next to me in microbiology? It’s not his fault. Is he part of the priveleged class in a sexist soceity? Yes. But “privilege” does not automatically make a person bad (hell, it doesn’t even automatically make them lucky: some other disadvantage might might come along and completely counteract all the advantage that privilege could be giving them; you never know). Evil is not inherited or biologically bestowed. The bad parts of our culture rub off on all of us: we live and speak and breath them, and yeah, within that structure, historically oppressive classes are in general endowed with more power to abuse / don’t have to deal with all the layers of bullshit that oppressed classes have to put up with. But those realities and trends don’t define who we are as individulas, and pretendign they do really flattens the world into a very bleak, helpless determinism. 

So on the one hand, it’s really hurtful to deny the very real disadvantages that many women have and continue to experience simply by virtue of existing in a culture that traditionally empowers men at the expense of women. It is ESPECIALLY rude to make sweeping statements blaming “women” for their own sucky situation (by denying the responsibility and/or existence of an oppressive class). AT THE SAME TIME, it is deeply fucked up to imply that anyone is inevitably going to become a monster because of their gender identity and/or because of the way they were born. We can’t treat race and sex/gender like they’re some kind of original sin, whereby one inherits the collective guilt for all the evil deeds of one’s predecessors. Its just….its a very fucked up hole to go down and i’ve been down it and, no. Bad shit. 

So idk, forging a think-space somewhere between “All Men Are Monsters” and “Sexism Against Women Doesn’t Exist / Is Women’s Fault” would be a really nice.

*transphobes DO NOT TOUCH THIS WITH  A 10 FOOT POLE, I WILL CUT YOU and your gender WILL be cancelled

[elliyoyo]

Home (Teen!George Washington/Trans!Reader)

Day 4 of @hamwriters writeathon (Worldwide Day)! This has no real location to it, but I’m growing up in a rather tight-knit area that is generally filled with religious people or extremely judgmental people, so I haven’t come out to many people, but most of my peers have been rather accepting. This is what I wish would happen when my family makes fun of me for who I am or talks shit about the LGBT+ community. Also ;) @boss-headcanons I know you were kinda excited for this and I just adore my platonic soulmate twin babe @gunsandfics so you get tagged, too.

This is based on a female-to-male transgender teenager, but you can change the pronouns and easily make it male-to-female.

Warnings: Extremely homophobic and transphobic language/word usage, swearing, mentions of the whole transgender bathroom thing, and me not knowing how to characterize Teen!GWash or his parents.

(Y/B/N) is your birth name and (Y/N) is your name that you prefer that people should respect and call you by or they will have to face my wrath :))))))))

Words: 2212 (I got carried away but this is really personal for me and I was almost scared to post this)

Coming home was always something you looked forward to. Not home, not where your biological family was, but home to George. You had known each other for most of your lives and even though you weren’t fond of each other as children, you grew closer as you grew older. Your house was just down the street from his, which turned out to be a blessing once you realized you were transgender. Whenever your parents would make remarks or make fun of you for how you dressed, you would tell them you were going out for a bit and just go to his house so you could cheer up and tell him what happened.

Today was an especially bad day. Your parents had been especially into the recent news today and saw that there was recently a case about transgender people using the bathroom of the gender they identify that had gone to the Supreme Court. You sat on the couch, taking small bites of your dinner, knowing exactly how your parents were going to act once the news had gone on to another subject.

“Tch, fucking perverted trannies need to just shut up and be thankful for what they’re given. They ask for more and more everyday, but what do they do? Bitch and moan that it isn’t enough. The fuck is up with those fags?” Your dad laughs and takes a sip of his drink, sitting down next to you, placing an arm around you. “Right, (Y/B/N)?”

“Uh, yeah, sure, dad,” you say, frowning into another bite, holding back your sigh. He knows how upset this shit make you and he knows that bringing it up will make it worse.

“You don’t seem too enthusiastic about shit talking those faggots. You wanna say that again?”

“Not really, no…” You give him a side glance and set down your fork, putting your hands in your lap.

“What, you one of them? Huh, (Y/B/N)? You a tranny, too?” He pushes you and laughs, looking over at your mom who is laughing as well.

“Maybe I am.”

There is a long silence before your dad starts to stand up.

“You’re fucking with me. You’re fuckin’ fucking with me. No way I raised a goddamn pussy like a tranny,” he snarls, looking at you with a fierce expression that makes you want to bolt out the front door. You start standing up as well, dashing off to your room instead of the front door, so you could grab a few small things, knowing full well you weren’t staying the night here to deal with their shit.

You grab a small bag and stuff in your phone charger, a lighter, a toothbrush, a few bobby pins, and a twenty dollar bill just in case, then run back downstairs. Your father catches your eye and opens his mouth, continuing his hateful rant from before, but you just go towards the door, trying to push away what he’s saying.

“You fuckin’ get back here! We gotta have a conversation about you thinking you’re some piece of shit fa-”

“Dad, seriously, shut up! You don’t know anything about what you’re talking about! You’re in absolutely no place to be shit talking my peers, my friends, my people, so just shut up!” With that, you slam the door behind you and walk towards the only place you really could go at this point- George’s house.

Ever since your parents had started getting really bad, like your dad was then, you started going over to his house, simply telling him and his parents that you would explain it all later when it was over with. His parents didn’t like the idea of you staying the night with their son, but they soon came to realize that you quite literally only had the energy to go to their house, plus George calmed you down well, so they weren’t complaining. Since about the third time you stayed over at random, they’d basically been like a second set (or rather, a better set) of parents to you. You’d eat meals with them and they’d congratulate you on your grades and they’d make sure to pick up snacks you like at the store so George can give them to you in school as a little pick-me-up. You practically never stop thanking them, even though you know they’ll probably act like your parents did once they eventually find out that you’re transgender.

You’re knocking on their door, mid-thought and glassy eyed, before you even know it, so used to the routine. The door opens mere moment later and George is looking back at you, wearing his usual outfit of a worn out t-shirt with some fuzzy pajama pants.

“(Y/N)! Come in, it’s gotta be cold outside! We were just cleaning up dinner, would you like anything?”

You can only bring yourself to respond with a shake of the head. He immediately sees that something is wrong. You’ve had this look in your eyes for far too long and he doesn’t like it. He likes his (Y/N). His (Y/N) with the dorky but captivating smile and eyes that shine brighter than all the stars combined when they talk about things they admire, like music or him.

“...My room?” You nod. “Mom! Pop!—sorry (Y/N),” he whispers to you before continuing, “—(Y/B/N) is over! We’re gonna go up to my room!”

“Alright Georgie, but no funny business okay?” His mom always joked about that, but knew nothing would happen. You could hear it clear as day in her voice. George laughs at her and convinces you to let him carry your bag even though it’s small. You walk up the stairs to his room and upon entering, you collapse onto the carpet, a blubbering mess. He sets your bag down and sits down next to you, wrapping an arm around you.

“Hey hey hey, what happened? Your parents again?” He rubs your shoulder supportively, pulling you to his chest.

“I came out,” you barely manage to say before you knot a hand in his shirt, letting out a sob.

“Wh- oh, (Y/N)... they didn’t touch you, did they? I swear to god, if they did I—” You quickly shake your head and start pulling at his shirt, telling him to stop. “Okay, good…” He goes silent for a moment, unsure of what to say. “I’m sorry that they’re like that… You’re always welcome here, whenever they pull anything like that again.”

“Thank you s-so much, George… You have no idea how much it means to me.” You wrap your arms around him and begin crying on his shoulder. He doesn’t mind, he simply rubs your back and lets you cry it out, whispering to you that it’s okay. “We should tell my parents about this, though. They’re really confused about why you’ve been coming over so much lately.” He looks down at you, searching for approval in any form, but only finds more tears and what he can only guess is a held back scream of no.

“Please, no. No, they’ll never let me over here again because I’m… I… I’m me…” You look down at the ground, wiping your eyes with your sleeves.

“(Y/N), you know they’ll accept you. My parents aren’t like yours, they’ll still love you and support you just the same. They might have a few questions, but other than that, it’ll be like nothing changed.” You still shake your head, fearing that they would never let you near the house, or let you see George, again. You were more worried about not seeing George because he was your rock and whenever something happened, he was there and you couldn’t lose that.

“...Can I just stand there and you tell them? ‘Cause I don’t think I’ll really be able to talk. You know how I-”

“Lock up when you get nervous? Of course I do. Look, if I can order your lunches at school for you, I can come out to my parents for you, okay?” He presses a kiss to your temple and helps you stand, beginning to lead you downstairs.

“If I lose my only safe haven because of you, I will never forgive you.”

“You won’t, now stop it.” He walks downstairs, smiling at his parents, who are there waiting.

“We heard crying… Do you mind if we ask what’s wrong, (Y/B/N)?” At his mom’s use of your birth name, you cringe and look down, then at George.

“...No, um… Mom, Dad, he doesn’t like being called (Y/B/N)... his name is (Y/N) and he’s transgender and can confirm that he’s deathly afraid you’ll hate him for it.” George forces all of that out in one breath. His parents are silent for a good fifteen seconds before you can’t control your quivering lip or tears any longer. You put your hand over your mouth to muffle the sobs and catch the tears falling over the previously dried ones. You couldn’t believe it, but you had practically trained yourself to accept that even the ones that say they love you and care about you can be changed by the tiniest of things.

“...(Y/N)? It’s kind of a weird name, but I like it. It’ll take some getting used to, but hey, we’ll try our best.” Mrs. Washington says, smiling at you, pulling you into a soft hug with teary eyes as well. “Right honey?”

“Of course. You’re welcome to come over anytime you need it. There’s always leftovers in the fridge and you know where we keep the soda, so you and Georgie can study and, well… I don’t know, what do teens do these days?” His dad laughs and clears his throat before continuing. “Anyway, we’re not going to push you away or bully you or be pricks because you’re different than us or we don’t quite understand all of this yet.”

“I have an idea,” George says, smiling over at you while you’re still being smothered by his mom. “How about we go to the diner down the street in a bit after (Y/N) gets cleaned up and cheered up, and we get some dessert with him?”

“I think that’s a great idea, son. Now, Mary, stop suffocating the boy, we have to get the dishes done and give them some time.” Mr. Washington puts his arm out, practically pulling his wife off of you.

“Oh, ha, yeah, right. Georgie, please bring him upstairs and just hang out until we’re ready to go.” She smiles at her son who slides his hand into yours, nodding. He leads you back up the stairs and notices that you’re grinning from ear to ear, tears still falling, but the tone of the tears has changed.

“...They… accepted me… George, your parents accepted me! Automatically! Straight up! Oh my god!” You pull him down into a tight hug, pushing your head into his neck.

“Well, of course they did. My parents aren’t as bad as their shitty puns suggest, (Y/N),” he jokes, rolling his eyes. You snicker and look up into his eyes, the joy of the situation reflecting back at you. You two get closer and closer without realizing it, but before you have the chance to meet in the middle, George’s mom calls for him from the kitchen. You flush red and pull back, sparing him one last glance before going into his room to change into some more comfortable, not tear-soaked clothing. You smile in his mirror, feeling much more refreshed, looking at yourself from pretty much all angles before he returns.

“C’mon, time to… You look incredible, (Y/N).” He smiles at you and walks over to you, standing next to you, checking himself out in the mirror as well. “I gotta say, you look about five times as good as me.”

“Ah yes, the pure neighbor-magnets that are my old sweatpants and t-shirt. Real sexy, huh?” You laugh and tug at your worn t-shirt that you’d had for a good few years now.

“Extremely. Alright, not sexy, per se, but rather cute.” He wraps his arm around your waist, pulling you closer to him until you two were pressed together. Now he’s either just really teasing or he’s actually genuinely ignorant for not realizing what he was doing. You roll your eyes, figuring it was the first, and lean up to plant a small kiss to his lips. He looks down at you after with wide eyes filled with adoration, wonder, and the literal embodiment of fucking finally.

“We have dessert to eat. We can do this later.” You take his hand and pull him down the stairs, smiling at his parents.

“Let’s go, kids,” Mrs. Washington declared with a smile.

“To the diner!”

You, from that moment on, ended up going there as soon as you got off the bus, only grabbing a drink from your house, then going over to your home. Where you belonged and where you were loved and where you were kissed while homework was supposed to be being done and where the dinners were always home cooked with love and most of the spice cabinet (not that you minded much).

It was nice to have a place to call home for once. Even better to call it home with those who made that house a home.

[transgenderhelp]

Hi! My name is Dani and I'm from Minnesota. I recently found out about this anti trans group who is trying to block a high schooler from using the locker room of their preferred gender, right in my home state. They have hired lawyers, and paid for public speakers to try and sway the school board. I am going to speak in opposition to them, and I am looking for firm points I can use against them. I would love the community's input to make sure I have the strongest argument for my case! Thank you!

Sure, Dani, it’s always great to see more trans people speaking out!

One big thing to keep in mind: what’s obvious, basic and self-evident to us as trans people is probably scary and foreign to this school board. Trans people as rational, complete human beings? Check. Trans people as actually their genders and not whatever people want to assign to them based on their bodies? Check. To get through to them, you’ll need to explain some really, really obvious things without seeming condescending. No one likes to find out they’re wrong, especially not when they feel like they’re being talked down to. 

Also? Speak from the heart. National statistics carry a lot of weight, but so do your personal experiences as a local trans person, who knows what’s going on right where they are. If there are any of your personal experiences you feel okay sharing, go ahead!

Apologies for the ensuing text wall!

Some ideas for talking points: 

Look at the people most affected by these laws: trans kids and their families. Do they want this rule? Nope. Who does? People with no experience with the trans community. Pandering to the whims of people who are disconnected from the situation and ignoring the people this rule would affect the most is ridiculous - like asking a child’s third cousin in New Hampshire to choose their school in Minnesota instead of just going to their parents. How would they know anything?

If rules like this were necessary, we would already be seeing attacks. We’re not. Where are all the bathroom predators in states where there are no potty police laws on the books? What about all the entire countries where bathrooms aren’t sex-segregated? If there are no weirdoes pretending to be trans to creep on people in locker rooms now, and there are still none after the rule passes, it did not make anyone safer. Look at North Carolina  - there were 0 such attacks before HB2, and 0 after. The stated purpose of the law - to protect (cis) women and girls - was not accomplished. There was, however, a spike in calls to trans suicide hotlines - which shows you the real motivation for passing the law.

These rules will increase bullying and gender-policing. Fertile ground for witch hunts and actual, non-fearmongering stalking and rape.

It is unenforceable. Are they going to hire someone to stop and examine children on their way into the locker room, or watch them while they’re changing, to make sure they have the “correct” genitals and no trans kid tried to enter the “wrong” room? Do they really want to take child molestation from a far-fetched “maybe” - at best - to a surety?

A major consideration for families when they move is the quality of the schools. Families don’t want their kids to go to a school that will only protect them if they meet certain criteria, of being cis enough or Christian enough or white enough or anything else. Families want their children to feel safe at school period, end of sentence. Just like companies didn’t want to go to North Carolina and have their employees’ dignity questioned because of HB2, losing the state millions, families aren’t going to want to move their child into a school where concern for their welfare is iffy and conditional. A school district should protect all students, trans ones included.

We have proof that transphobic rules hurt trans people, but no proof that trans-accepting rules hurt anyone at all. (Supporting trans kids can even save their lives.) The right’s complaints that we need potty police rules/laws or else a weirdo COULD pretend to be trans to attack someone have exactly as much basis as saying that we should never walk on sidewalks because someone COULD be driving their lawnmower down them and run over our toes. I mean, I guess it could happen, but there’s no evidence that it does or is about to, so worrying about it is ridiculous. Is making laws for things that don’t even happen really the best use of the school board’s time? 

They’re worried about a problem that does not exist, and you’re worried about a real one. Really drive that point home. Trans people are victims of harassment/beatings/rapes in bathrooms more than the perpetrators. Put the pressure on the anti-trans group to prove that they have a reason to be upset.

Rape and assault are already illegal (and, in this case, against school rules, I would hope). These crimes should be investigated wherever they occur already - no additional rules or legislation are needed, just start enforcing the existing ones. If they would still take action against a kid who rapes someone in a cafeteria, they need no added rules to take action against a kid who rapes someone in a locker room.

Remind them, at the end, that they could kill this kid. Trans people die because of transphobia, at their own hands or others, all too often. Do they really want to risk being complicit in that?

Hope all goes well! Way to take initiative and start speaking up!

-Mod April