#unless it's some certain things I'll just call her or he)

[screamsofanoutlawbrain]

I can describe my gender as being the way it is because I was built a girl, and I had to learn slowly over time that the changes to myself I have made have nothing to do with my gender or sex, but I feel like I got something a bit funky going on inside and I feel a bit like I'm not fully girl but not anything else. I identify as demi girl, and I am a demi girl in the way that a cupcake is a muffin but a muffin is not a cupcake.

Aka if being a girl was like our solar system, then I'm pluto. Technically I'm not supposed to be in there, but nobody wants nor cares to push me outta the party.

[lov3lycosmos]

"Even In The Storm, I'll Be Your Shelter"

Pairings: Seungmin x Fem!Reader (fem worked easier...srry)

Genre: Fluff & Angst

Summary: Seungmin leaves for the store, leaving you and your mother alone, where she says some hurtful things. He comes back to find you outside with his blanket and plushie~

cosmos note: I think angst or fluff is my favorite thing to write cause I'm melting... (this request)

The rain had just started, he sound pattering against the window.

It had been a calm enough evening at first. The three of you—you, Seungmin, and your mom—stood side by side in the kitchen, the scent of dinner still lingering in the air. Plates were stacked in the sink, and soft conversation filled the room. Seungmin, ever the helpful presence, was already drying dishes with a small smile on his face.

"We should have dessert," your mom suggested, her tone light. "I was thinking about making that lemon cake, but it turns out I’m out of sugar."

"I can go grab some," Seungmin offered immediately, setting the plate he was drying on the rack. He always liked to help, and you knew he would never turn down an opportunity to make things easier for you.

"Oh, no need to rush," your mom replied with a wave of her hand. "Unless you wouldn’t mind?"

You hesitated. You knew what it meant when Seungmin left—the air between you and your mother often grew heavier in his absence. But you couldn’t ask him to stay, not when he was being so thoughtful.

"It’s okay," you said quickly, offering a small smile. "We’ll be fine."

Seungmin’s eyes lingered on you for a moment, as if silently checking to make sure you were certain. Then, with a nod, he grabbed his keys from the counter.

"I won’t be long," he promised, leaning in to press a gentle kiss to your forehead. "Call me if you need anything."

"Love you," you murmured, your hands brushing against his.

"Love you too, baby." He smiled, his warmth lingering even after he stepped out into the evening air.

And then, it was just you and your mom.

The silence settled, interrupted only by the clink of utensils and the hum of the refrigerator. For a while, you tried to busy yourself, helping clear the remaining dishes and wiping down the counter. But even as your hands moved, the weight in the air thickened.

"He’s a good man," your mom commented, her voice carefully neutral.

"He is," you agreed softly, waiting for the inevitable follow-up.

"Takes good care of you."

You swallowed. "He does."

A beat of silence. Then she added, "Sometimes I wonder if you rely on him too much."

The words landed heavily. You gripped the cloth in your hand, trying to steady yourself. "What do you mean?"

She shrugged, though her tone was far from casual. "He’s always the one fixing things, handling everything. It’s like you can’t manage without him."

"That’s not true," you defended, though the tremble in your voice betrayed your emotions. "We’re a team. He helps me, and I help him. That’s how relationships work."

"Relationships also mean standing on your own two feet," she countered, her gaze sharp. "And I’m not sure you even know how to do that."

The knot in your chest tightened. "I handle things, Mom. I have my own job. I manage my responsibilities. Just because I have anxiety doesn’t mean I’m incapable."

"And yet you crumble the second things get difficult," she shot back. "I’ve seen it. You spiral. You shut down. And who picks you up every time? Seungmin."

"Because he loves me!" The words burst out before you could stop them, the frustration bubbling over. "And I love him. He doesn’t see me as some burden, Mom. He supports me, just like I support him."

"Supporting is one thing," she said coldly. "Enabling is another."

The argument escalated from there, each exchange sharper than the last. Every time you tried to defend yourself, she twisted your words. Each accusation chipped away at the fragile walls you had built, and by the time her voice dropped to a cruel murmur, you could feel yourself unraveling.

"You can't even handle your own anxiety. How are you supposed to handle anything else?"

Your chest tightened, and the tears threatened to spill. Without another word, you turned and rushed outside, the door slamming shut behind you.

———————————・❥・

The rain poured down, soaking through your clothes as you sat curled on the deck. Seungmin's blanket was wrapped tightly around you, though the fabric did little to keep away the cold. The Pikachu plush he had given you, the one he held onto for comfort, was clutched to your chest. Its soft fabric grew damp with every sob that shook your body.

You couldn’t even call him. Your phone sat lifeless on the counter, drained and useless.

You didn't hear the car at first. Seungmin's headlights cut through the misty downpour, illuminating the deck. The moment he saw you, still and drenched, his face fell. Without shutting the car off, he rushed toward you, his sneakers splashing through the puddles.

"Baby?" His voice was breathless, laced with panic as he crouched down. The sight of you clutching his Pikachu plush made his heart ache.

"Seungmin," you whimpered, the sound barely louder than the rain.

"What happened?" His hands hovered over you, unsure of what to touch first. Your wet hair clung to your face, your lips trembling as he tugged the blanket tighter around you. "Come here, let's get you warm."

He didn’t wait for a reply. His arms slid under your knees and back, lifting you effortlessly. You didn’t fight it, curling closer to him, the Pikachu still cradled tightly. He opened the car door and set you inside, the heat enveloping you immediately. The smell of him lingered—safe, familiar. He grabbed another dry hoodie from the backseat, carefully draping it over your shivering form.

"Baby," he murmured, brushing the wet strands from your face. His thumb traced the trail of tears down your cheek. "You're freezing. Why didn’t you come inside?"

"I couldn’t," you whispered, your voice cracking. "I just... couldn’t."

Seungmin's jaw clenched, his worry quickly mingling with anger. He pulled the hoodie tighter around you, then reached into the backseat for a towel he kept from an earlier gym session. Gently, he started drying your hair, his movements slow and methodical.

"I'm so sorry I wasn't here," he said softly. "I should've been here."

You shook your head. "It's not your fault."

But the guilt still sat heavy on him. He pressed a lingering kiss to your forehead before tucking you further into the oversized hoodie. The warmth of his scent wrapped around you, calming the trembling in your limbs.

"Stay here, okay?" he said. "I’ll be right back."

You watched as he stepped out into the rain once more. He gathered everything—the soaked blanket, the tossed-out items your mother had discarded in her frustration. His hands shook slightly as he carried them to the trunk. Then, without another word, he turned toward the house.

He was gone for a while.

The sound of rain mingled with the faint hum of the car engine. You couldn’t make out what was being said, but Seungmin's voice was firm, unwavering. And when he finally returned, his face was set with resolve, though a shadow of sadness lingered in his eyes.

"Come here, love." He slid into the driver’s seat, pulling you gently toward him. You nestled into his chest, feeling the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. His arms encased you, fingers tracing calming patterns along your back.

"I’m so proud of you," he whispered, his lips brushing against your temple. "For everything. You handled that so bravely."

And for the first time that night, you believed him.

Seungmin adjusted the heat, letting it warm the cabin further as the rain drummed softly against the roof. He reached for the radio, turning the dial until a slow, comforting song played through the speakers. Without hesitation, he began to sing along—his voice low and soothing, a soft lull that wrapped around you just as tenderly as his arms did.

His hand found your thigh beneath the oversized hoodie, tracing gentle circles with his thumb. Each motion was deliberate, a silent reassurance. Between verses, he murmured praises, his words spilling like honey.

"You're so strong, baby."

"I'm so proud of you."

"You did so well."

Every word anchored you, pulling you further from the storm that had raged inside your chest. You leaned into him, the rhythmic rise and fall of his voice grounding you. His fingers never stilled, each stroke against your leg a reminder that he was there, that he wasn't going anywhere.

When the song faded into another, he pressed a kiss to your temple, his lips lingering. "I love you," he whispered, his voice thick with emotion. "So much. And I’ll always be here."

And in that moment, wrapped in his warmth, you knew he meant every word.

Taglist: @vampzity @sooniedoongiedori25 @mhluvie @yaorzu-blog

[xxepherr]

.ೃ࿐MRS HOLLYWOOD

summary — in which hasan is caught in the loop of a cyclical relationship with hollywood’s biggest star

pairings — hasan piker x fem!unnamed!actress!oc

pronouns — she/her

word count — 736

note — based on mrs hollywood by go-jo. just a small little thing to get me out of my writer’s block — its nothing special

ON AGAIN, OFF AGAIN.

how many more times was he going to respond to another text? how many more times was he going to leave the key to his house under the doormat?

hasan knew better. at thirty-three he had enough life skills and knowledge to avoid things that used to rope him in a decade ago. perhaps that was why he had matured to a certain extent, but that didn't seem to extend to her.

she was glitz and glamour, a pretty picture splashed across a canvas and decorated to the brim with jewellery. the centre of so many hit films, it seemed that being the centre of hasan piker's world was the only one that mattered.

hasan knew better than to keep letting her back in. she was the same toxicity of a drug, and twice as addictive. she was never around, always departing to go star in the next big thing, never sending a text or bothering to call unless she wanted something.

“you’re always MIA,” he mumbled, the stars shining through his window as the moon kept watch. “where do you go?”

“not everyone works from home,” she mumbled back, closing her eyes as she tucked herself into the large arm he had around her.

“when can we go back?” he tried again. hasan’s fingers tangled in her hair, soothing against her scalp. “this is killing me.”

she remained silent. she couldn’t settle down, running away was all she’d ever known. long-term never worked because then she couldn’t escape, but the excuse of work was wearing thin. she knew hasan didn’t believe her anymore. for fucks sake, most of her filming locations were maybe thirty minutes from his house. it’s not like she was halfway across the fucking globe or anything.

“i can’t,” she answered in a dull fashion, “all you do is work, i’m the same—“

“but you’re not,” he cut her off. it was hard to be upset when they were skin to skin, kept decent by a thin sheet. “it’s been five fucking years.”

“you can forget about me,” she tried to roll out from his arms, but he only tightened them in response. “let me go, has.”

“you can’t keep running,” he said calmly, refusing to raise his voice at her. he used to years ago when things were rockier and her tendencies were dripping with toxic sludge, but it was never the solution. she would just disappear for longer, surfacing in milan or some other foreign place for a day or two before she fell off the map again. “there’s nowhere left for you. this can be your home, too.”

home for her was an apartment in the heart of hollywood. she owned a smaller one in malibu, but neither were home. it was just a place to sleep on the nights she wasn’t staying in hasan’s large bed. there weren’t family memories in the walls like the walls in his house, or the smell of home cooked meals on the occasion that his mother was around and willing. it was just empty — grey walls and white couches, picture frames scarce unless it was one that had been gifted to her after a successful film.

there's nowhere left for you. where hadn't she gone? travelling wasn't just for film locations, it was to get away — to escape things she didn't need to anymore, to continue to feel something by doing all she ever knew how to. packing a few things and fucking off was so easy, running never got tiring . . . but she was nearing thirty. soon enough she would have to settle down somewhere to keep herself grounded, to keep herself afloat.

hasan was offering that. could she take it? it was the easy way out, a way to find that stability that she never could seem to take before.

"just . . . at least stay until morning," he tried one last time, rolling onto his side to press closer to her as if that was the solution to her constant disappearances. "i'll try to make you breakfast."

"mhm, maybe," was all she could mumble, succumbing to the warmth of his body heat and falling into a peaceful slumber.

HASAN woke up the next morning to an empty left side of the bed, the blankets neatly made where she had slept as if she had never been there to begin with. just like always.

[applestorms]

@jessaerys ok shit this took a while but WHATEVER. wammy's lore collection here we go :3c less analysis this time, this is mostly just to archive the main known details we have in canon about the house, and also the people from there more generally. however much you wanna accept all this/take it at face value is up to You, Dear Reader (and tbh y'all should just read all these if ur curious since they're all pretty short + have Interesting narrators. i'll include links to free versions). do whatever you want forever etc. etc. also, SPOILERS. obviously.

LABB: (listen here)

no this book isn't written by ohba. yes i'm including it. shush. anyways, most of the lore in this comes from mello's vague comments about beyond's backstory, but there's a Lot of interesting things established in this, so. here's a bunch of notable quotes. if you're not already familiar, please keep in mind that the narrator of this novel is mello, writing at some point shortly before his death.

"L. The century's greatest detective. In light of his staggering mental abilities, L died an unjust and untimely death. In the public record alone he solved over 3,500 difficult crimes, and sent three times that number of degenerates to prison. He wielded incredible power, was able to mobilize every investigative bureau in the entire world, and was applauded generously for his efforts. And during it all, he never showed his face." (pg. 10)

"So, what you're reading now are my notes about L. It's a dying message, not from me, and not directed at the world. The person who will most likely read this first will probably be that big-headed twit Near. But if that's the case, I will not tell him to shred or burn these pages. If it causes him pain to discover that I knew things about L that he did not, then that's fine." (pg. 10-11)

"I am one of the few people who ever met L as L. When and how I met him...this is the single most valuable memory I have, and I will not write it here, but on that occasion L related to me three stories of his exploits, and the episode involving Beyond Birthday was one of these." (pg. 11)

"Obviously, it never came to light that L--and more importantly, Wammy's House, which raised me until I was fifteen--was deeply connected to the matter, but in fact, they were. L, on principle, never got involved in a case unless there were more than ten victims or a million dollars at stake, and this is the real reason why he belatedly, but aggressively, involved himself in this little case, which only ever had three or four victims. I will explain further in the pages that follow, but for this reason, the case of the Los Angeles BB murders is a watershed event for L, for me, and even for Kira. It was a monumental event for all of us. Why? Because this is the case where L first introduced himself as Ryuzaki." (pg. 11)

"For any one else but those two [Near and Kira], my identity may be of no interest, but I am the old world's runner-up, the best dresser that died like a dog, Mihael Keehl. I once called myself Mello and was addressed by that name, but that was a long time ago. Good memories and nightmares." (pg. 12)

"She [Naomi Misora] briefly considered the idea that Raye Penber, or someone else, was playing a practical joke on her, but she found it hard to believe that anyone would be so bold to sign their name as such. L never revealed himself in public or in private, but Misora had heard several horror stories about what happened to detectives who tried passing themselves off as L. It was safe to say that no one would dare use his name, even in jest." (pg. 18)

"This was L, so he was undoubtedly solving several other difficult cases all at once. Cases all over the world. For him, this case was just one of many parallel investigations. How else could he maintain his reputation as the world's greatest detective? The century's greatest detective, L. The detective with no clients." (pg. 35)

"L had earned a certain degree of hostility from other detectives, and the jealous ones called him a hermit detective, or a computer detective, but neither of these is a particularly accurate representation of the truth. Naomi Misora had also tended to think of L as an armchair detective, but in fact, L was quite the opposite, a very active, aggressive individual. [swoon.] While he had absolutely no interest in social connections, he was certainly not the kind of detective to shut himself up in a dark room with the shades drawn and refuse to come out. It is now common knowledge that the three great post war detectives, L, Eraldo Coil and Danuve were all actually the same person. Certainly, anyone reading these notes is almost certain to know...though they may not know that L engaged in a war with the real Eraldo Coil, and the real Danuve, and emerged victorious, claiming their detective codes. The details of this detective war I will save for another occasion, but in addition to those three names, L possessed many other detective codes. I have no idea how many, but there were at least three digits' worth. And quite a number of those were fairly public detectives--just like, as anyone reading these notes must know, he appeared before Kira, calling himself Ryuzaki or Ryuga Hideki. Of course, Naomi Misora had no way of knowing this, but in my opinion, the name L was, for him, just one of many. He never had any direct connection to that identity, he never thought of himself as L--it was just the most famous and most powerful of the many detective codes he used during his life. The name had its uses, but lacked obscurity. L had a real name that nobody knew, and nobody will ever know, but a name which only he knew never defined him. I sometimes wonder if L himself ever knew exactly which name was written in the Death Note, which name it was that killed him. I wonder." (pg. 43-44)

"If we must discuss why L so adamantly refused to reveal himself, we can explain it very simply: doing so was dangerous. Very dangerous. While the world leaders should make efforts to ensure the safety of all the finest minds, not only for detectives, the fact is that the current societal systems do not allow for this, and L believed he had no choice but to protect his mind under his own power. By simple arithmetic, L's ability in 2002 was the equivalent of five ordinary investigative bureaus, and seven intelligence agencies (and by the time he faced off against Kira, those numbers had leapt upward several more notches). This is easy to think of as a reason to respect and admire someone, but let me say this as clearly as possible: that much ability in one human is extremely dangerous. Modern danger management techniques rely heavily on defusing risk, but his very existence was the exact opposite. In other words, if someone was planning to commit a crime, they would greatly increase their chances of getting away with it by simply killing L before they began. That was why L hid his identity. Not because he was shy, or because he never left the house. To ensure his own safety. For a detective of L's ability, self-preservation and the preservation of world peace were one and the same, and it would not be correct to describe his actions as cowardly or self-centered." (pg. 69 nice)

"So whenever L was working, he would usually have someone else as his public face--and in this particular case, the FBI agent Naomi Misora was filling that role." (pg. 70)

"Beyond Birthday had the eyes of a shinigami congenitally. It was not particularly difficult for him to track down people with the initials B.B. or find people who were fated to die on a certain day at a certain time." (pg. 94)

"Normally contact with a shinigami was a prerequisite for acquisition, but Beyond Birthday had traded nothing--he had seen through those eyes since before he could remember. He knew your name before you said it. He knew the time of death of every person he met." (pg. 94)

"You might think [the eyes] would hardly be useful without a Death Note, but that is simply not the case. The ability to see someone's remaining life is the ability to see death. Death, death, death. Beyond Birthday lived his life unceasingly reminded that all humans would eventually die. From the time he was born he knew the day his father would be attacked by a thug and die, knew the day his mother would die in a train crash. He had these eyes before he was born, which is why he called himself Beyond Birthday. Which is why a child as strange as he was taken in by our home, sweet home--Wammy's House. He was B. The second child in Wammy's House." (pg. 94-95)

"The competition between L and B. L and B's puzzle. 'If L's a genius, then B's an extreme genius. If L's a freak, then B's an extreme freak. Now it's time to get ready. There are things I must do before B can surpass L. Henh henh henh henh.' This thought was the only thing that made him laugh without needing to think about it. And those that know will recognize the laugh of the shinigami. Still grinning to himself, he faced the mirror, brushed his hair, and began applying his makeup. The reflection of himself in the mirror. Himself. As always, he could not see his own time of death. No more than he could see the death of the world." (pg. 96)

"We were raised at Wammy's House in England, in Winchester, as L's successors, as L's alternatives, but that does not mean we knew anything more about L than anyone else. Including myself, only a few of us ever met L as L, and even I knew nothing about L before he met Watari--Quillish Wammy, the genius inventor who founded Wammy's House. Nobody knows what's going on in L's head. But even so, I know how Watari felt. Looking at L's incredible talents from the perspective of an inventor--of course he wanted to make a copy, of course he wanted to create a backup. Anyone would feel the same. As I have already explained, L never appeared in public. L knew that his own death would increase the crime rate all over the world by a few dozen percentage points. But what if they could copy him? What if they could make a backup? That was us. L's children, gathered from all corners of the world.

"But even for a genius like Watari, creating a fake L was easier said than done. Even for Near and I, who were said to be the closest to L...the more we tried to be like him, the closer we got, the father away he was, like chasing a mirage. So I hardly need to tell you what it was like when Wammy's House was first founded, when he was still experimenting. The first child, A, was unable to handle the pressure of living up to L and took his own life, and the second child, Beyond Birthday, was brilliant and deviant. B stood for Backup.

"But B tried to surpass L, not become him...no, that might not be right. I have no way of knowing the inner workings of his mind. He...their generation was not like the fourth generation, with Near and I, all the children bound only to the code with the serial L. They were prototypes, never even given the L code, expected to fail. I prefer to refrain from idle speculation based on my own experiences, but, well, Beyond Birthday may have thought something like this: As long as there was L, B would never be L. As long as the original existed, the copy was always a copy." (pg. 104-105)

"The Los Angeles BB Murder Cases. L.A.B.B.--L is After Beyond Birthday. This reading is why I think this name is so much closer to the killer's intentions than the Wara Ningyo Murders, or the Los Angeles Serial Locked Room Killings. I wasn't talking about the names on a purely stylistic basis. Whether Beyond Birthday had put that much thought into it I have no idea, but if he had a specific reason for choosing to commit his murders in L.A., then that is probably why. I am sure he had a much more personal obsession with L as an individual than Near or I ever did. I can understand why someone would become a criminal in order to fight against a detective, which is why I can write something like this, but even so. What did he hope to accomplish by killing unrelated people? Or perhaps B simply wanted to meet L. Then he could use the eyes of the shinigami he'd been born with and see L's real name, see when L would die. He would be able to figure out who L was. Beyond Birthday had never told anyone that he had the eyes of a shinigami, and it would not surprise me at all if he believed himself to be some kind of shinigami." (pg. 105-106)

"Beyond Birthday challenged L. And L accepted the challenge. To put it bluntly, the Los Angeles BB Murder Cases were nothing but an internal struggle, a civil war within our home, sweet home-- Wammy's House. Unfortunate for the victims that got mixed up in it, but even if Beyond Birthday had not killed them, all those victims were fated to die that day, at that time, for some other reason, so logically and morally, their deaths were unavoidable. So in the strictest sense of the word, the only one who really got mixed up in their war was Naomi Misora." (pg. 106)

"L was said to never move on a case unless there were more than ten victims or a million dollars at stake. The only exceptions to this were cases at difficulty level L (extremely fitting), or when L had personal reasons compelling him to get involved. The Los Angeles BB Murders were both of these. I hardly need to point out the difficulty by this stage of the story, and L was essentially fighting his own dead copy. [harsh, dude.] The current head of Wammy's House had told Quillish Wammy/Watari, who had told L about B's disappearance in May, and ever since L had been looking for him even as he solved other cases. Wammy's House only knew him as B--they did not know his real name, Beyond Birthday, so this search was near impossible, but L knew who the killer was. He had not been looking for a killer so much as he was looking for a case. L had been waiting, expecting Beyond Birthday to do something to challenge him. L could move any policeman in the world, but in this case, he could not ask anyone for help except Naomi Misora...more than likely, for this reason. I don't think L really put that much stock in honor, but everyone is embarrassed by their own sins, and nobody wants those missteps to become public knowledge. L was the goal of everyone in Wammy's House. Every one of us wanted to surpass him. To step over him. To step on him. M did, N did, and B did. M as a challenger, N as a successor. B as a criminal." (pg. 116-117)

"No matter what she did, she had no way of knowing. That this killer, Beyond Birthday, could tell someone's name and time of death just by looking at their face, that he had been born with the eyes of a shinigami--she had no way of knowing that fake names were useless with him, completely and utterly pointless. How could she have known? Even Beyond Birthday himself could not explain how he had been born with the eyes of the shinigami, how he could use them with no payment, with no arrangement. Neither Misora nor L knew why, and, obviously, neither do I. The closest thing to an explanation I can offer is that there are shinigami stupid enough to drop their notebooks in our world, so there might well be shinigami stupid enough to drop their eyes." (pg. 193-140)

"'So, Naomi Misora...' said L, wrapping up. But Misora hastily stammered, 'Um, er, L...' but then she hesitated, not sure if she should ask this or not. 'You...know the killer, right?' 'Yes, as I said. He is B.' 'I don't mean like that...I mean, he's someone you know personally?' On the 16th, L had said that he had known the killer was B, and she had sort of known ever since, but two days before, L had said something that changed her guess to conviction. Whatever you do, please catch the killer. The century's greatest detective, L, would never say that about some ordinary indiscriminate serial killer. And the way his letter was just one letter long... 'Yes,' the synthetic voice agreed." (pg. 144-145)

"'I have nothing to do with him,' L said. 'To be completely accurate, I do not even know B. He is simply someone I am aware of. But none of this affects my judgement. Certainly, I was interested in this case, and began to investigate it because I knew who the killer was. But that did not alter the way I investigated it, or the manner in which my investigation proceeded. Naomi Misora, I cannot overlook evil. I cannot forgive it. It does not matter if I know the person who commits evil or not. I am only interested in justice.'" (pg. 145)

"My great and respected predecessor, the man whose actions were a strong influence on me personally, B, B.B., Beyond Birthday--obviously, I need hardly explain again that the murders themselves were not his purpose. So what was he doing? Again, I hardly need to explain--he was challenging the man he copied, the century's greatest detective L. A matter of winning or losing. A contest." (pg. 159)

"Since L could solve every case no matter how challenging, if he created a case so difficult that L as unable to solve it, B would have defeated L." (pg. 159)

"He knew that the moment he took action Wammy's House and Watari would alert L, so he did not even bother trying to stop them. He could only guess at which stage of his plan L would start to come after him, so he prepared things carefully, ready for L's entrance at any point." (pg. 159)

"B approached Naomi Misora, calling himself Rue Ryuzaki. Rue Ryuzaki--L.L. For anyone from Wammy's House, there could be no higher goal than identifying yourself with that letter--and Beyond Birthday seized this case as his chance. even Naomi Misora knew what had happened to detectives falsely identifying themselves as L, and B was from Wammy's House, so he knew this better than anyone--so this choice suggests the strength of his decision. He never once intended to survive--had had made up his mind. He was ready." (pg. 160) [trans. note: the name "Rue" in Japanese, ルエ (ru-e), is an anagram of エル (e-ru), which is how L is pronounced.]

"Naturally, his face and fingerprints would burn as well--he had always disguised himself with heavy makeup while he was with Misora, and he never left a picture behind, so even if someone directly affiliated with Wammy's House inspected the body, they would have no idea that Rue Ryuzaki/Beyond Birthday was B from Wammy's House. He had left nothing to connect Beyond Birthday to B." (pg. 162)

"B was presenting the Los Angeles BB Murder Cases to L as a case that could never be solved. That L could never solve. In other words, he had never prepared any clear solution to it--since the killer had committed suicide, disguised as the fourth victim, there was no longer a killer to catch, and no clues left to catch him with." (pg. 163)

"My poor, poor predecessor. Not only was he utterly and completely defeated, but he survived, driving home his embarrassment...he must have longed for death. Accept my condolences, B." (pg. 169-170)

"If I had space left over I had intended to carry right on into the other two stories I heard from L: the story of the detective war between the three greatest detectives, all solving that infamous bio-terror case, with guest appearances by the last of the alphabet, the first X to the first Z from Wammy's House; and the story of how the world's greatest inventor, Quillish Wammy, aka Watari, had first met L, then about eight year's old--the case that gave birth to the century's greatest detective, the Winchester Mad Bombings that occurred just after the third World War. But however objectively I look at things, I do not have the space or the time. Oh well." (pg. 170)

"She had spoken to L only once after the killer was arrested. He thanked her for helping to solve the case, and told her just a little about the background of the case. That B had been a candidate to succeed L, and that the pressure of that had driven him off track." (pg. 171)

"And a few years after his arrest, on January 21st, 2004, serving a life sentence in a California prison, Beyond Birthday died of a mysterious heart attack." (pg. 173)

C-KIRA: (read here)

near grief :pensive: pretty sure this was animated in the anime movie thing?? tbh i still need to watch that. Very interesting as some of the most recent post-main story lore we get about wammy's imo. less quotes now + more summarizing since these are just comics

near has apparently only "talked" to L once (in quotes since he didn't actually say anything, just sat in the back of the room doing a puzzle the entire time. real asf girl)

during this "conversation," roger or one of the orphanage heads set up the usual L screen + a camera/mic so that L could see all the kids and answer their questions.

notably, mello & near didn't ask any questions, just lurked in the back watching L with a "nasty look in [their] eyes," which near assumes is what made him pick them to be his top successors, considering the fact that he didn't actually look at any of their data. (somewhat seems to imply that L didn't actually give a shit about grades or anything like that when picking his main successors?)

while answering questions, near is caught off guard by one of L's answers. to transcribe it all directly here--

NEAR (NARRATING): At the time, I didn't think L would put it so bluntly. L: It's not a sense of justice. L: Figuring out difficult cases is my hobby. If you measured good and evil deeds by current laws, I would be responsible for many crimes. L: The same way you all like to solve mysteries and riddles, or clear video games more quickly... For me too, its simply prolonging something I enjoy doing. L: That's why I only take on cases that pique my interest. It's not justice at all. And if it means being able to clear a case, I don't play fair, I'm a dishonest, cheating human being, who hates losing...

not quite the monster speech, but fascinating all the same. near seems to imply that this answer sent some kids into a despair spiral, but it actually caused him to like L more and more, feeling that he was, "exactly the kind of person who wanted to achieve his own goals." kinda goes against the HTR13 ohba comment? shrug

The Wammy's House/L's One Day: (read here)

honestly i interpret these comics as like. canon crack fic. but anyways, here's the established L lore included in these two.

L was taken into wammy's as a nameless orphan at an unknown but likely quite young age

very soon after arriving he beats up all the other kids he meets--

he is "utterly incompatible," with all the other kids and monopolizes all the things he likes simply cause he's stronger than them and presumably could fight them for it-- naturally, he ends up usually just playing by himself

notably, this all establishes that L isn't the first kid at wammy's, that there was already at least one generation of older kids living there before he got there (and could eventually turn it into an L successor creating machine)

once watari realizes that L has some outstanding mental abilities, he gives him his own private room and a computer. afterwards, L spends most of his time sitting in front of the puter by himself

L requests that watari buy 1 million pounds with Japanese yen and tells him which stocks to buy, causing his assets to reach "almost 20,000 times the original amount," in two years. visually this is depicted as happening when L is still quite young

several years later, L stumbles across a serial murder case in the news, which is the first he solves, starting his new career path

-

L can stay awake for 100+ hours and then gets over it by sleeping for like 17 hours. pictures also may imply that he doesn't actually sleep in a bed, but just lies down sideways in his chair. RIP yotsuba light's perfectly designed sleep schedule

L also shits/pisses in the same position he usually sits in (frog-pose), facing the tank south park style

he is a big fan of cleanliness!! human washing machine etc. etc. honestly i think this is just another way for him to hold that same crouched position

text says he always has, "ten or so identical sets of clothes prepared for him," since he's picky about it, but the art itself shows way more than ten. also rare shirtless L moment?? (watari helps)

L does in fact go outside!! he likes roller coasters/theme parks, swinging, art galleries, live music, etc. though most of the time he just sits in his room thinking thru shit n solving cases.

[lukolabrainrot]

Calm theory anon here and I seen an ask as I was scrolling that made me think. One question was why would Luke continue to see Ant if she was involved with pap gate? And another question was why would he continue to date ant it he knew it was hurting nic? So let's tackle the first one. My question to you is do you automatically think the worst of the people in your life? Do you automatically have bad things happens and assume it's someone attached to you? I personally don't. I think to figure out who was behind pap gate would be difficult and he might have just assumed they followed him from the after party to the hotel. He might not have even put two and two together. We know the girl been baiting the fans but an outsider would just think she taking pictures and posting them. So why would Luke think any type of different? To him she wasn't nasty. She I'm sure showed all her best qualities to him. Remember even though they been "seeing" each other for a year he's been gone for most of that. So did he really know her? No how can he when he spent so much time touring, and even when he was back I'm sure he was exhausted in between countries. So yes there is a possibly he didn't put two and two together. We still don't know who called them we still have just theories and I'm sure he's not gonna ask backgrid who called. Actually why would he even go that route mentally and assume it was his people? I'm sure that thought didn't come in his head till it became a pattern which was Italy. Now why would he continue dating Ant if Nic was hurting? Now this one made me pause a bit. Why would he? then it dawned on me who to even say they had that discussion on how they feel about each other. How would he know how she felt unless she told him? I personally am a people pleaser and honestly at times it sucks. I always put myself last. So it goes to stand if Nic knew he was seeing her then why would she get in the way of his relationship? She would never be the reason they broke up. Men naturally are able to communicate feelings as good as woman are. They are naturally logical thinkers. They react to issues using logic where as woman react using feelings. So Nic did why I would have done thrown herself into work and just have some fun try not to dwell on something you can't change. I seen an article that spoke on she went from the Tour to straight to filming. She didn't have to dwell in the Luke stuff cuz she kept herself busy. Now personally I think they have talked since then. I think it was after Italy. Who knows if they spoken feelings? But i do think things are moving in the right direction. Hey maybe this JD photos got a certain person moving.

💯

Hard to know EXACTLY what's been going on BTS with L/N since the beginning of the year. I personally think they have seriously been working on their romantic relationship since the Italy stop of the WT. I think papgate threw a wrench in everything though and things were definitely not all rainbows and sunshine between L/N this summer. I think they took some space this summer to figure out there stuff, and there was some type of positive shift between them after the Italy bday trip. I also personally think things have been kind of off and on between L/N for a while, and they have known each other so long, that if they can get on the same page, I think things will get serious pretty quickly. And I have this theory (based on everything I've seen between them this year and PARTICULARLY N's chaos week), that they have finally gotten on the same page 😉

I am also going to say this. I think it speaks VOLUMES what L/N have on their public grid of each other (and the other people in their lives they DON'T choose to put on their grid). Especially N (who's a lot more SM savy than L). I've said it before, and I'll say it again. L (not Colin) is ALL OVER N'S GRID 🤔

[jals-stuff]

hello :) saw ur headcanons! mind doing one w deli and the sl*tty jester pleaseeee?

good day anon~ I see that everyone is barking for Domina and Famin so I'll do just that.

SPOILERS AHEAD FOR MASHLE! If you do not know Domina, Famin, Delisaster and Meliadoul, please do not read!

Unless you don't care about spoilers. Then you're free to read~

How would these Mashle characters react if they found their s/o stuck in the washing machine? + personal ratings (again)

For Meliadoul, Domina, Famin and Delisaster.

Warnings: embarrassing? there's an f-bomb somewhere in here

short washing machine headcanons (part 2!)

MELIADOUL…

She’s probably training Ochoa to do stupid things she saw on the internet when you call for her. (Thank you for saving the little guy.)

She’s going to laugh out loud when she sees you stuck head first inside the washing machine! Of course she will. “Please c’mon, please say Stepsis, I’m stuck!” but you won’t, because she’s laughing too hard for you to even understand what she just said.

When she’s finally calm again, she will try to get you out, struggling quite a lot and muttering insults towards the poor washing machine’s family tree, then finally give up and cut through it with her Magical Chainsaw. 

You’ll get very scared, of course, and the chainsaw will absolutely cut through you, but you’ll feel extra relaxed afterwards. She will occasionally tease you about this episode, mostly if you’re cuddling with her.

Made fun + cut you with her Chainsaw, but now you feel nice. You aren’t even mad, 8/10.

DOMINA…

Domina is attempting to make some apple pie when his focus is broken by a muffled scream coming from the laundry room. He sighs and immediately makes his way there.

With anyone else, he would get super angry, but it’s you, and he loves you very much. “Oh no, (Y/N), are you alright?” He isn’t panicking, but he’s a little worried that you might be feeling in pain or too uncomfortable.

He will undoubtedly get you out very nice and slow, and make sure to inspect your face and arms to be absolutely certain that you aren’t hurt (you’d better hope so if you don’t want him to molest your poor washing machine afterwards).

If you’re embarrassed or uncomfortable about it, he’s going to bring you with him and keep making apple pie (it was supposed to be a surprise for you but fuck it) to distract you.

Gentle and cute, definitely makes good pies. 9/10 don’t forget to praise him for this please

FAMIN…

He’s.. I don’t know, probably stealing stuff from his brothers’ rooms when you call him, and his head makes a whole 180° turn before he realises that you need him, and he comes to see you.

Will probably sit on your back while you’re stuck. “Is it nice in there?” he’s going to ask while giggling. If you say it isn’t, he will pull you out immediately and sit next to you to check your expression for any discomfort.

However, if you’re dating Famin, you’re the type that will say it’s nice, so he will first of all pull you out of the washing machine, and then take your spot in there. He’s going to end up being stuck too.

Now you have to pull him out and you don’t know how to do that, you’re left with a jester inside a washing machine. Sounds like the beginning of an awful pun.

Helped, but got stuck instead. at least it was funny, 7/10.

DELISASTER…

He is 100% scrolling on social media or taking selfies when you call for him, and he’ll keep his eyes glued to his phone while making his way to you.

Upon seeing the pitiful display in front of him, he chuckles. “Oh, em, gee. Are you, like, stuck or something?” He will definitely sit down next to you and take selfies showing his face next to your figure, completely stuck.

He will start a TikTok livestream (titled "LMAO F IN THE CHAT FOR (Y/N)") and ask his followers for advice to get someone out of a washing machine, and make absolutely sure that everyone can see you. What a jerk.

If you start sulking or being too uncomfortable, he will put his phone away and get you out of there immediately, without any further questions. Maybe he’ll take you to a party or let you rest on his lap as an apology.

Mean, and why does he speak like a frat boy?? But at least he’s pretty and the party was nice. 7/10

[absolutely-esme]

Monster!Tim Coraline au part 3

I had more thoughts on the au from here and here.

First off, It's called Hungry Monster Tim au unless and until I come up with a better name.

That's the tag that will help you find related content. I titled the post the way I did so that people who found the au before it had a name could recognize it. I'm hoping this will minimize confusion.

...

Now, I figure I'll talk a bit about how others view Tim.

The most of the earlier additions to the Batfam have mostly interacted with Tim in Emotional Support Tim mode.

Emotional Support Tim is pleasant and comforting. He is not overly exuberant and joyful in a way that would grate on fresh grief. He is also not joyless in a way that might make a hero feel obligated to worry about him. He is gentle and competent. His patience seems nearly endless. He can tolerate both being coddled and being leaned on. He can tolerate both being clung to and pushed away. He can tolerate switching back and forth at unpredictable intervals.

Tim approached Nightwing in his standard state of "tired, low on patience, and possibly about to do something stupid," once before Tim realized he was also grief-stricken and in no fit state to get Batman under control. He might have an inkling that Emotional Support Tim is an act, or he might just think Tim was having a bad day.

Bruce thinks Emotional Support Tim is what Tim is actually like. By the time Bruce was functional enough to not need so much managing, he'd gotten attached enough to the facade for Tim to have concerns about dropping it.

Alfred can tell that Tim is putting on a facade. He can tell that the role Tim has taken on is wearing on him. He doesn't like it. He feels guilty for allowing it to continue. He can't bring himself to put a stop to it when it's keeping his adoptive son alive.

Barbara initially meets Emotional Support Tim, immediately clocks the act, and pulls him aside to make sure there isn't something sinister afoot. Babs has reservations about every aspect of Tim's involvement, but agrees that something had to be done about Bruce. She lets him carry on for now, but she's ready to pull the plug if it seems like it's getting too much for him. She insists that Tim drop the act when it's just the two of them.

Babs doesn't know about the supernatural stuff specifically, but she knows there's more going on with Tim than what she knows about. She may learn that he has some hereditary health stuff that requires him to be extra careful about his food intake. She makes a point to not be weird about it because people being weird about her wheelchair annoys the crap out of her.

I like to imagine that Babs and Tim have a certain amount of solidarity over being the sensible ones who keep all these unhinged, dramatic bitches in line. They also have solidarity over ignoring the fact that they are just as dramatic and unhinged as the rest of the Bats.

Steph meets Tim in Regular Tim mode because Bruce isn't with him. Instead of trying to discourage Spoiler, he introduces her to Babs. Steph knows Tim as a tired smartass who kind of always seems like he's a bit hangry and trying not to take it out on anyone, but apparently he's just like that.

They don't date, but do become friends. Part of this is because grouchy, eternally hungry, constantly done-with-this-shit Tim isn't attractive to Steph but is kind of hilarious. Part of it is because Babs points out that there is no possible timeline where the kind of power imbalance from only one member of a couple knowing the other's secret identity doesn't turn toxic.

When Steph eventually encounters Emotional Support Tim, it creeps her out. She uses the term "pod person" when asking what the heck that was.

Steph's disastrous stint as Robin doesn't happen because she's already got her own thing going. She already has a mentor and appropriate protective gear. Babs and Steph actually get along better because they start their mentorship as Oracle and Spoiler without any of the complicated emotions of taking up a mantle.

I like Steph as Spoiler the best because it always seemed a little messed up to shove someone who already had their own original Identity into two legacy mantles. Let her do her own thing. She doesn't need to be a successor to Babs or Dick when she's already the OG Steph. Instead of giving her the Robin gear or the Batgirl gear, get her some upgraded, Bat-quality Spoiler gear.

Steph doesn't start a gang war or fake her death in this timeline, because the circumstances that caused it do not exist here.

Jason initially encounters Tim in Feral Cryptid mode, then writes that off as a fever dream after waking up to Emotional Support Tim. Once free of the Lazarus parasite, Jason makes it his mission to be a good big brother to Tim. Tim seemed a little stand-offish at first, but warmed up to him. (As soon as Tim realized that food was part of Jason's love language, he rearranged his meal plan to let Jason feed him without triggering supernatural problems with his metabolism.)

Jason eventually manages to earn Tim's trust enough to meet and get to know Regular Tim. Jason is both honored and concerned. Putting on such an extensive facade for the comfort of others has got to be exhausting, and Tim seems so worn down underneath it. Well, he doesn't have to do it for Jason anymore. Jason will happily hang out with and support any version of Tim.

When Damian shows up, he mostly sees Emotional Support Tim. Then he starts trying to kill him. Eventually, Tim's patience with the pint-sized murderer wears thin (possibly due to Damian hitting a PTSD trigger), and Tim goes Feral Cryptid mode. This freaks Damian out. There is no video evidence (which the rest of the Bats assume to be because Damian tampered with the security system in an attempt to get away with murder).

It doesn't happen again.

Tim doesn't bust out his powers or cryptid form against Damian again, but now that he's seen it, Damian sometimes sees traces of Feral Cryptid Tim lurking below the surface. Various little things he'd ignored that hadn't seemed significant on their own now seem to stem from the nature of what lurks inside the human skin.

Damian stops the murder attempts early. It's not because of ethics (which will take time to learn). It’s because he has no idea how to kill whatever sort of unearthly thing Tim is, and he recognizes how unwise it would be to continue attacking something he cannot kill. For now, Tim seems content to leave him be whenever he's not directly under assault. Damian doesn't want to risk becoming enough of a pest to be worth the effort of swatting.

...

I also had thoughts about Tim's post-Robin period.

When Tim goes on his quest to retrieve Bruce from the time stream, he doesn't take the Red Robin suit. He's going to be outside of the Bats' scrutiny, so he gears up with a suit and equipment he'd secretly made with his supernatural nature in mind. It's got Bat-standard armor and padding, but modified to accommodate a bit of form shifting without compromising protection. It's got a patchwork thing going on.

Tim sewed it himself, which allows him to manipulate it. It's also got buttons sewn in strategic locations to eliminate blindspots. (Taking down the beldam gave him the ability to control things he made and see through buttons he sewed).

His utility pouches are full of both Bat-standard equipment and things relevant to Tim's abilities. Also, he makes his pockets bigger on the inside, so he can carry a lot.

Tim isn't around the other Bats, so he's not being Emotional Support Tim. He's not using the minor illusion powers he got from the beldam to make himself look pleasant. He only makes the effort to be comforting when dealing with victims. He's just being the semi-feral scrungly dude he is.

...

Tim keeps in touch with Jason, Babs, and Steph while he's off on his quest to find Bruce. He occasionally pitches in with stuff that can be done from a distance.

Tim didn't say that Bruce was still alive before he had evidence. It's not because this version managed to predict that they wouldn't believe him, but rather because he thought he might have to do some supernatural stuff to get him back and didn't want witnesses. He just told the other Bats he needed to investigate something and would tell them more once he had figured out enough to know what to tell them.

This means that the other heroes don't think he's crazy, and Tim can use hero resources for his investigation.

I haven't decided yet if Tim will interact with the League of Assassins at all. On the one hand, I think this Tim might not need to work with them. On the other hand, Hungry Monster Tim terrorizing the League of Assassins and fighting the Lazarus Pit would be funny. Maybe Ras doesn't try to recruit him. Maybe Tim just shows up, fights the Lazarus Pit, and leaves without explaining anything to anyone.

Either way, I think that Tim is pretty much done with keeping up the Emotional Support Tim facade by the time he comes home after saving Bruce. It's been long enough to justify the change.

Babs, Jason, and Steph are happy for Tim because they can see how much better he's doing without the added strain of keeping up the act. They are also glad that he feels comfortable enough to just be himself.

Bruce and Dick are more in the horrified/concerned neighborhood because, from their perspective, Tim started off gentle-natured and glowing with health, got fired from Robin, disappeared for a while, and came back gaunt and world-weary.

...

I'm thinking about whether or not Tim should tell Babs, Jason, and Steph about the supernatural stuff he's got going on.

It would have come out at some point. If he tries to keep it secret forever, you can bet some kind of dramatic, high-stakes threat would force the reveal. That's just how the Bats' lives are.

What I am debating with myself is whether or not to have Tim choose to share a secret he's been keeping for as long as he can remember for fear of the danger discovery might bring with the people he trusts most without something forcing his hand.

If he does, I think he would tell Jason first. Jason has seen that side of him, and Tim allowed him to think it was a nightmare. Tim wouldn't want to risk Jason hearing about it from someone else. Tim would probably be scared. He doesn't know if Jason will still like him once he knows that Tim really is the Monster from his nightmare. He doesn't know if Jason will forgive him for lying about it.

I think this would happen after Tim comes back to Gotham after saving Bruce.

[imedited]

Manipulation (Ryomen Sukuna x Reader)

TW: dead dove, mentions of SA, huge toxic behavior

a/n: had to repost this because I made a mistake on it

You’re certain that you know Sukuna. He’s crazy, obsessed with you even, and you’re fully aware of that and for some reason, it amuses you. Of course, he doesn’t hurt you when he gets jealous or angry, no, God no, you’re too precious, too beautiful to be hurt, plus it isn’t your fault, it’s the scum men that lusts over you that needs to be punished.

You’re too innocent and naive to know how to seduce other men, to him, you’re a precious little dove that he needs to protect from everyone in the world. Sukuna knows all of the scums of the world and how he needs to keep you away from it, you’re his afterall. All his and no one else’s, and if someone even tries so much as to lay a finger on a stand of your hair, he’ll definitely go ballistic over it. “That’s a normal reaction, because I care for you.” That’s his excuse all the time.

And now his cock twitched as he was filled with rage as he watched you dress up for a girl’s night out. Apparently, your friends invited you to go out that night to get together. Ha, for sure that’s just a cover up to drag my little dove to whore herself out. He thought to himself.

“Baby,” Sukuna called out as he stood up from the bed and walked over to you. He wrapped his arms around your waist as he hugged you from behind, he rested his chin on your shoulder. “Are you really going out tonight? I’ll be lonely, you know.”

“It’s just for tonight, please?” You said as you turned to meet his gaze. “I’ll come back home early, I promise.”

“Alright, I trust you.” Sukuna said as she sighed and let go of you before sitting back down on the edge of the bed. In reality though, he’s starting to come up with a plan to get you to go home immediately, for you to seek his love and protection, to make you not trust those bitches that you call friends. He knows that they’re all a bad influence to you, they’re just turning his precious little dove into a dirty slut like them, and he can’t have that happening.

As soon as you left, Sukuna’s loving demeanor instantly fell and was replaced by a rage-filled and jealous man. He pulled out his phone from his pocket and started to dial someone from his contacts that owed him some money. He smirked as he told him where you were and what to do with you. He knows that you’ve been raped before and have a bad history with men sexually harassing you and he knows just how to use that to get you back with him.

He’s not going to tell him to do something drastic, no, just something enough to get you running back in his arms. He told the man to approach you and drag you somewhere isolated and attempt to force himself on you, but will eventually let you go without actually doing anything to you. And after that, all that there’s left to do is to wait.

Surely,after just about half an hour, the front door opened, revealing you in a panicked and terrified state. Sukuna immediately ran towards you, embracing you and giving you comfort,as if he wasn't the one behind the whole thing, but he doesn't have to reveal that, you're already there,in his arms where you belong.

“Shhh, it's alright now, baby, I'm right here. I'll protect you. He didn't hurt you, did he?” He asked, his eyes full of concern,but that's just a facade, inside he's actually screaming in delight to have you seeking comfort in his arms. "don't worry, no one will hurt you when you're with me.”

“You won't leave the house again,okay? You won't leave unless I'm there with you to protect you. My little princess, I have to keep her safe." He whispered as he kissed the top of her head.

"Yes, I'm sorry. I don't want to leave again." You whimpered as you buried your face in his chest, you could feel your body trembling. The fear and the flashbacks of your past kept seeping through your mind again, haunting you about the past again. 

Sukuna’s eyes softened as he rubbed your back gently, "There's my good little dove, now come here." He whispered, guiding your face upwards to make you look at him and meet his eyes . "Let's forget about this unpleasant experience, shall we? Let me make you forget. All you have to do is think about me and my love for you" He cooed as he leaned in, devouring your lips with his own in a desperate, punishing kiss. His hands moved from your back to your ass, squeezing it hard before pulling you closer against his rock hard erection.

Sukuna broke the kiss, his breathing heavy as he spoke, "Now, let's focus on what really matters tonight, yeah? Just me and you." Eric whispered huskily, his fingers tracing her jawline and down your neck, making you shiver. "You're mine, aren't you?" He growled, nipping at your neck and sucking on it,leaving a mark before lifting you up and carrying you to the bedroom, as your legs wrapped around his waist as he did.

Once in the bedroom, Sukuna laid you down gently on the bed and started undressing you slowly, stripping your clothes off with gentleness. He pushed your thighs apart, revealing your dripping wetness. "Such a filthy little thing, getting wet over some stranger's unwanted touch. Are you sure that you didn't like that,baby?” He said teasingly, trying to get a reaction out of you.

"No, it's not that. Please don't say things like that." You sobbed as you  looked at him with teary eyes, the fear from earlier mixing with the desire and lust that he makes you feel. "It's because of you… I always get wet when you look at me like that…”

Sukuna smirked, you could see that he was pleased by your response as he  climbed on top of you. "Good girl, my sweet little girl,always wanting me,needing me." he praised, his voice rough and arrogant. He leaned in to kiss your lips once more, this time less demanding, as he teased you with his tongue, muffling every moan that came out of your mouth as his hand roamed your body.

Slowly, he slipped his hard cock inside you, relishing the tightness and warmth that almost immediately clenched him greedily as soon as he pushed it inside. He paused for a moment to savor the feeling before starting to thrust, each movement deeper and harder than the last. His hands gripped your hips tightly, making sure you didn't move an inch. His eyes staring at you intently, watching as your expression fades away.

Your cries of pain and pleasure mixing together with the sound of your bodies slapping at each other, fueling his need for dominance. "That's it, take it,baby." he growled, "Take every inch of me, let my cock remind you of who owns you." The force of his thrusts grew stronger, his body moving in perfect sync as he began to lose himself, all he could think of was you and that sweet, flustered face that you made as he pounded you relentlessly.

He could feel your walls tightening around him, milking for his cum to spill inside you. You can't deny that that's not what you wanted as well. But God, does he love to hear it from you, to hear you beg for him to fill you up. “Such a greedy, little pussy, wanting my cock to fill up your womb, huh? You want it, baby?”

" Y-yes, please, I-I need it." You manage to moan out as you arched your back,your nails raking over his back,leaving scratches that he definitely would be proud of in the morning.

Sukuna smirked, loving the sound of your moans and whimpers and your attempt to speak up. He chuckled darkly as his thrust became more frantic, his grip on your hips tightened,leaving marks on it as his thrusts began to be faster, the tightening feeling of his balls, a clear sign of his impending orgasm. With a few more powerful thrusts, he came. His hot seed spilling inside you before he leaned down to kiss the corner of your lips. “Good girl." 

[moonjellysfeast]

Arthur and Hanna - Debut

cw; torture, kidnapping, manipulation, religious imagery, angel character, unhealthy dynamics.

Of course Arthur needed a guardian angel, his life was wracked by misfortune and the proof was scarred across him. He tended to wear sweaters to hide as much of them as possible, though he couldn't do much for the one traveling up his left cheek and through his dead eye. Each scar looked like a river with how it cut through the many freckles covering him, reminding him of times where she only just kept him alive.

For as kind and loving as Hanna was, she was first and foremost, a good angel. Her instructions had been to keep the boy alive at least until he found his true calling. Of course, they hadn't specified what that was to be but Hanna felt sure it would be obvious when they found it. She hardly spoke to him, even when he was young and begged her to just remind him he wasn't as alone as he seemed. Hanna was a good angel, she followed instructions. That had been why she hadn't done anything when Arthur was kidnapped. Nor when he was chained in a barn, just a bit separated from some kidding goats. However, when you came to him in the daylight, suddenly visible to Arthur and his angel, she took a bit of pause. You grinned at him and Arthur felt something click within himself.

"Aren't you glad I didn't string you up? Just a bit of chain attached to the wall, I know your kind are too good at escaping for just the gate, lambs like you can climb~" you held his chin, inspecting him like any other livestock.

"I-I am, sir. P-Please don't kill me..." Arthur whined, him and Hanna watching your smile grow in awe.

"What a sweet thing you are! Now, don't tell me someone else has kept you~ Folk like me don't let our animals wander wild like you were. Plus you're a bit underweight, little lambs should be well fed or you'll never make enough meat to be worthwhile. Unless you were a dairy creature, in which case, you must not have been bred yet..." You grabbed a fistful of his sweater, drawing attention to the size of his chest, sizable for a man, but not anywhere near what you'd expect of a proper dairy cow.

Arthur stared at you, bright red in the face. His poor brain could not process the implications of what you said, too confused to even notice you cut his shirt off with a sickle. He was only broken from his daze when rough hands landed on his chest. As you ripped the rest of his clothes off and muttered to yourself about a lack of branding or tagging, Arthur squeezed his eyes shut, a mess of emotions he couldn't decipher. Upon examining him thoroughly enough to be certain he wasn't claimed, you traced your sickle over his skin, the sharp blade leaving a small trail of crimson behind it. He shuddered and whined but made no move to pull away, even whimpering out some apologies.

"Such a sweet thing~ I ought to keep you alive, so I'll have to mark you as mine, lamb~" You step away from him to go prepare a brand for him.

"Uhm... Sir? You... are not human, are you? You-You are a shepherd," A soft voice echoed into the barn moments before Hanna was pinned to the straw-covered floor. She was in clear awe, having taken a human-esque form she still had golden wings that now splayed out like a taxidermy bird. "I've kept him alive for you~ You're his- our shepherd~ My lord~"

[verystrxxwberry]

Hello! I hope you’re doing well! I noticed your requests were open so I was wondering if you could write a headcanon for Eldarya about MC/Erika or whatever you want to call her giving the ANE guys attitude? Like being upset for whatever reason (that doesn’t necessarily involve them) and them having to handle her in some way? Anyways if you don’t feel like it don’t worry about it, I’m just glad you’re back!

ELDARYA; ANE routes when you’re upset

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𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭: sfw, ANE routes when you are angry/sad/unhappy. ↝ 𝐂𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: Hi, I am doing great, thanks for your words and request! I hope you enjoy these headcanons <3 and I am sorry if there is any spelling mistakes...

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NEVRA

The moment he greets you and you simply ignore him or answer in a not very nice way, he becomes worried and wonders if you had any trouble in your day. If he didn’t do anything to make you upset, he is aware of that and doesn’t tend to overthink. In fact, he goes after you and sits besides you, placing his hand on your back.

He got used to dealing with Karenn being upset while growing up, so he knows how to be patient in these situations.

He stays there with you and caresses your back. “What happened? Your pretty face seems mad.” He talks with a low tone to not stress you even more. And even if you don’t want to talk about it, he stays there unless you ask otherwise.

Once you explain to him what happened, he won’t act unless it’s a very unfair thing. He cares about you and he knows you are strong enough to do things on your own. He can give you advice and cheer you up to act, because come on, babe, go eat them up. In case it is something very unfair, don’t worry, he is gonna be there to eat them up too.

If it was his fault: The moment he realized you wouldn't like one of the things he did, he already started planning how to apologize. He can read your expression pretty well, and he feels bad when you look so drained. Why did he do certain things that he knew you wouldn't like? Ah, that's simply because he wasn't thinking. He was simply impulsive.

Don’t try the silent treatment with him because he is gonna be so needy for your attention at some point that he will cross his arms and sit in your lap -no matter if he crushes you- or lay down his head there and say “are you willing to forgive me?”, “come on, chill a bit and let’s talk”, “I won’t move until that moody face disappears.”

He is capable of pinching your cheeks to bother you, but it can only go two ways… good or bad…

He will not let you go until you feel better.

LANCE

He is genuinely confused and overthinks the situation. Why didn’t you accept his cheek kiss?- He has already done too much bad stuff to allow himself to hurt the one he loves the most in his current life. He’d be like “Uh, what did I do..?” 

If it’s his fault, he is gonna search for the best way to make it up to you, because he has a mask to keep in front of others and being in a tense situation with you makes him not be able to focus on work. At first, he would give you time to be alone and not be so invasive. He probably did a mental speech of what to say to fix it for the last few hours, and when he feels prepared, he kneels in front of you and grabs one of your hands. “Darling, could you please listen to my words for a bit…? I want to be honest…” His voice is softer than usual, you can even feel that the authority and roughness he always speaks with disappears and there is a vulnerable side of him showing at this moment. 

In case you forgive him, you would notice how he leaves a few kisses on your hand as thanks, without saying anything else. In case you do not forgive him.... well, he would leave a timid kiss on your hand and mumble "It's okay, I understand. I'll be patient." Although inside he's truly impatient to know if you forgive him....

He'll never do whatever he did to make you unhappy again.

If it’s someone else’s fault, he is going to talk with the person that made your day worse, or to reassure you with a hug -because he doesn’t know how to comfort too well with his words-. Put him on a leash because if he finds out that someone has done something bad to you, he won't hesitate to have a 'serious conversation' with them. 

LEIFTAN

Being your soulmate, he can feel the anxiety that has formed in you at the moment when what has upset you happens. Even if you are far away, he is already thinking about what he will do when he sees you. Maybe you need your space, or maybe you'd like him to be there to calm you down.

Very patient, he has had to deal with Miiko's and Lance's anger many times -although sometimes they would get on his nerves, but Leiftan knows how to keep some serenity and calm so that things don't escalate to more-. So, he will listen to you and then give you the advice you need.

And don't be afraid, because whether it's his fault or not, Leiftan will never judge or devalue your reasons for feeling bad. Whether it's because of some insecurity of yours, some accumulation of stress or something, he's going to nod his head and let you let it go. You don't have to be ashamed of feeling negative emotions.

If it is his fault, it is most likely a misunderstanding or some minor action of his that has accumulated with the stress you were already carrying. He has no problem apologizing from the bottom of his heart and clearing up anything that was misunderstood. In case it was something external, Leiftan will be able to advise you.

And after speaking to you sincerely, he would lean towards you to kiss your head and caress your shoulder gently. "I encourage you to be more direct with your thoughts and not let them accumulate like this. When you burst out, you can end up hurting yourself and others, and you don't deserve to carry that pain alone by yourself." She would explain in almost a whisper, while pressing little kisses on your head and shoulders.

MATHIEU

He is concerned and a little bit paralyzed, not knowing how to act. He takes a deep breath. He is not used to dealing with his partner being like this. He approaches and hugs you from behind and asks “Have I done something to upset you?”, notoriously worried.

Mathieu genuinely doesn’t know what he did if it was his fault, so you should refresh his memory if it was the case.

And man, a pout appears on his face, feeling guilty of making you upset. "Oh, jeez... Forgive me." And his arms wrap around your waist, hugging you and burying his face in the crook of your neck. The most likely thing that bothered you about him was dealing with all his energy at some bad time, because Mathieu can be intense with his games and pranks. There are times when even if you tell him to stop his prank, he can keep it up, and many times throughout his life he has found himself in the situation of having annoyed someone by his explosive energy of happiness.

To cheer you up, he would leave you alone for a while while he goes to prepare your favorite food. And suddenly, from behind you would be caught by an arm that would drag you to bed. In a matter of seconds you would be wrapped in a blanket that surrounds your whole body except your face, and in your lap a bowl of your favorite food. Mathieu would hold you between his legs, letting you rest your back against his chest and saying. "Even if you are angry, have this delicacy as an offering of your forgiveness, your majesty..." 

He would just stay there, hugging you silently -except if you bring up a topic of conversation- while you enjoy your meal. He will be happy to see you enjoying it, and even more, when you forgive him he will be very excited.

If it were for an external cause, his response would be "Oh, honey, I know the world is an unfair place...but let's try to cheer you up now and we'll figure out how to deal with it later." He's not much of a counselor, but he does know how to distract you from whatever negative situation you find yourself in.

✩; remember to reblog and like to support my content. I hope you enjoyed it!

[lucifer-is-a-bag-of-dicks]

when I took a month off work I was lowkey worried I'd come back and find everyone had been fine without me and I wasn't needed at all (because being terrible at every previous job I've had did some ✨damage✨ to my self confidence)

but that is not what happened

I have never encountered someone so fucking happy to see me as my boss' wife was on my first day back, her face lit up like it was christmas, she was practically jumping for joy because now that I'm back she doesn't have to do the ops team's fucking timesheets anymore

I have been told by one of the ops guys that my leave of absence had caused a genuine rift in the boss' marriage because his wife hated doing my job so much they were actively fighting about it

to be clear, his wife is lovely, she doesn't usually throw a shit fit about just anything, it was just that my job is just so fucking annoying that she hated every second of it, and that was the most validating shit I have ever experienced in my LIFE

and the reason she was pissed off at my boss/her husband about it is because he's too soft on his crew and doesn't make them all report their hours for the week

which, as you can imagine, makes building their timesheets extremely fucking difficult

it basically turns the whole process into a puzzle that I have to solve using roughly three different sources of information, one of which is the boss himself who isn't always easy to get ahold of when he's on a site

this puzzle is made even more difficult by the fact that a glitch in our form system keeps messing up the dates on the timecards, so I have to cross reference the time cards from the two (2) ops team members, who actually DO fill out their forms, with the roster, but my boss often changes the roster at the last minute without telling me or noting it down, so then I have to cross reference with the reports they have to submit for certain ongoing jobs because they'll have correct dates and also a list of who was present (if they were doing one off smalltime jobs that week I'll have no physical records and will rely entirely on the boss' memory to confirm dates and staff numbers, unless I can get ahold of one of the ops team members themselves and there's only one who will reliably communicate with me but only when he's not currently on a site)

I tried to explain this process to boss' wife before I left and, looking horrified, she asked me 'is there no way to streamline this?' I replied 'this is streamlined'

as far as I'm aware, as long as I've worked there, there has only been a handful of times people were paid incorrectly, and it was because I was not given correct information by the boss, in the time I was gone, his wife told me that she had incorrectly logged several pays because of this broken ass system

so, as you could imagine, my ego is through the fucking roof right now, I am GOOD at this bullshit job, I took an impossible system and made it work, I am playing on hard mode and killing it, in a field I had zero experience in before taking this job other than a natural inclination for organising and scheduling

and to be clear, I love this job, the boss is too soft on his staff but he's a good guy, he makes us all feel valued and appreciated, he paid me above my award rate, he's absurdly accommodating, and I have an insane amount of freedom to do what I want with company files

I may be working with a bullshit system but I can take naps in the office whenever I want and tell my boss off when he's being too soft (one time his wife literally started clapping when I told him off for sending clients their reports before they'd paid for them) and I get to control when I work, and whether I work from home or the office (which is GREAT when my back flares up)

I might not get many hours (only 16 hours per week) because the company is so small and I run out of things to do because I've streamlined everything (boss literally called me TOO EFFICIENT), but he'll give me those 16 even if I spend half of it playing solitaire and watching youtube

so just, yeah, it feels so good to be confident in my work, to feel valued and appreciated and like I'm actually successful at something after being handed dud jobs for years that I wasn't cut out for, and now knowing that what I'm doing is actually genuinely hard but I've been doing it anyway without fail, makes me feel good!

so tldr; taking a month off work taught me I have phenomenal job security because if my boss ever fires me his wife might actually fucking kill him

[waspgrave]

PLEASE don't shut up about your OCs I followed u in the first place because I'm so 👀👀👀👀 I wanna hear more about Fableeeee

THANK U ANON 💖💖💖😭😭😭 i used to be so chatty about them, I really wanna get there again. So now I'll start bc I will always talk about my boy!! sorry i this is a lil long teehee whoops

Fable is my very first dnd character (from 2017??) who has been through so many designs and reiterations before he got settled as an npc in my wife's Waterdeep game. I don't get to know any main plot stuff with him in our game until its time to watch it unfold as we play, but I still play around with him behind the scenes for non-plot-related-stuff bc he's my beautiful angel.

Personality-wise, he's got cat energy. A little standoffish and isn't one to go talking to strangers unless he feels its necessary or you like, genuinely need help or something. Has resting bitch face - he's a little intimidating to approach because he always looks so annoyed. Will insult you if he truly dislikes you; his use of vicious mockery can be devastating to one's ego. BUT he's very affectionate and protective with his loved ones. It should be considered an honor and maybe a personal victory tbh to be called his friend.

His class is College of Creation bard. He was an adventurer but after some incidents, he's now an art conservator/illuminator at the Font of Knowledge and Scribe's Guild in Waterdeep. He's the guy people will go to in order to repair priceless artworks or even old tomes for Blackstaff Academy. Knowing Mending makes it easy but sometimes things can't always be repaired with spells, so he'll spend hours and sometimes weeks researching and working on certain projects. He enjoys this change of career. Less likely to get maimed or exploded (but it can happen with certain artifacts)

He's a tiefling (1/4th drow on his bio dad's side lol). He's got an older half brother named Drac, who is close enough in age to him that they're like twins, and a baby sister named Elsbeth (who is 15 yrs younger than him). His mom was a Harper who actually died to a suspicious cult in Baldur's Gate :( One dad is a wizard/griffon knight and the other one (the previously mentioned bio dad) is a sorcerer that works for Waterdeep's newspaper. His grandparents run a forge in the Trades Ward.

Used to be in an adventuring party known as the Fells. They worked for the Blackstaff primarily in Waterdeep. It was fun and cool and exciting and they are apparently heroes in the Southern Ward. Fable prefers to remain low-key and/or just not be acknowledged at all when it comes to that.

Boyfriend, River Belrose, is a detective who works with his other best friend and former adventurer, Oliver Lanngolyn. River and him got involved in some classic caste drama since River is a noble from one of the noble families of Waterdeep who was due to be married off to Lydia Neverember, the Open Lord's daughter. That fell through when River sort of renounced his noble title (as did Lydia) to live a commoner life with Fable.

His eyes always given the impression of burning flames. He's a little self-conscious about them as growing up a tiefling isn't the easiest.

Sometimes he paints his horns with pretty patterns (he also does this for his siblings).

Big fan of food (any) and stealing food (any) from friends and family.

Despite the standoffish personality, Fable is a bit of a boy scout. If there's a granny crossing the road, he's gonna be helping her. If there's a cat in the tree, you know he'll be climbing to get Fluffy to safety.

Was taught his skills as a bard at New Olamn. Can play the lute and is a pretty decent singer. He'd rather gnaw off his arm than perform in front of people ever again.

Worships Oghma and Ilmater. Tosses a few prayers and offerings to Umberlee mostly so a typhoon doesn't hit the city one day.

I don't like any of my old art of him so here's some my wife has drawn:

[wonallofme]

„Pinching“ Pt.2 Ideas (long message sorry 🙈)

The next day Reader sees Hee with a other girl. It‘s not just a random girl, it‘s Jung Ara the IT Girl of the school. She‘s known for being a skilled cheerleader, for her good grades, her visuals and her lovely personality is the cherry on top.

It seems like that they’re becoming close and Reader starts to feel insecure (also very depressed), because just yesterday Hee toke her virginity and made her feel special. The time is passing by and reader realises that Hee is not worth of her time and that she‘s better than this. She‘s kinda getting the „Wizard Liz Mindset“ Priorities herself and taking more care of herself. Eventually she’s getting a glow up: the grades are getting better and better ( from C‘s to A‘s) Her skin starts to glow, she finds inner peace and overall is just happy and healthy. Now that all is getting ruined by Heeseung, he notices the changes and out of some reason he wants to destroy that. So he tries it with reader again but this time it’s a no no (recommending the song Mascara by XG fits good) While Heeseung is with Ara he can’t get Reader out off his head. He‘s imagining things with her now. Reader meets a new guy which happens to be an ass who just wants to manipulate Reader. Heeseung know this guy from the past and tries everything to warn the reader „He is no good for you“ „but you are?“ It‘s a heating conversation and he is starting to confess his feelings, getting on his knees starts to cry and beg reader to give him a second chance (I love to see men crying sorry, if that scene is cringe 💀) And yeha that‘s how I imagine pt.2

Thank you for thinking so much about pinching and even imagining this as a second part 😭

I like jealousy too so seeing that you tried to help reader change for the better (inner peace and happiness as you mentioned) is actually really nice, even kind of adorable ngl. Also, I have to admit, I love to see men crying and begging.

You've helped me kind of see what could happen but I think we both have different ideas haha (it's completely okay please dw, I appreciate your comment a lot anyway!)

So, what I've thought about goes a little like this:

In the first place he already gave her a lot of attention that you would have to be blind not to notice. Just in school, he would interact with her and try to touch her in every corner, whether it was pinching her cheeks, waist, or any other body part, he was touching her, and I feel no one dared to approach reader not only because they didn't want to become a target, but because she had become his, as his belonging or toy, there was a kind of possessive feeling Heeseung made sure everyone noticed.

I feel that after what happened in reader's house something changed inside Heesung's head. Yes, she was always his toy, but now she had stepped up to a different thing he can't pin point. The fact that he's now feeling pleasure from her, and that he doesn't mind her abusing him in private would make him closer to reader in a certain way. I feel he would follow his words and wouldn't be as hard on her as he was before, and he wouldn't look as if he was bullying her around anymore but he would still be there and when people asked him if you two were anything he would say no because he doesn't feel the need to put any label on you (before he would maybe call you his toy? Maybe piggy?) and he honestly doesn't give a fuck what other people think. Still, it's obvious you're letting him do something to you the others now can't see and even you feel a little confused of what happens when you're alone because he now pinches you (not too hard unless you're refusing him) and also fucks you.

So, I'll be real, I don't see him wanting any other girl. I feel he's found his satisfaction from you and if he tried to fuck any other girl it would be just because he feels like it (not because of appearance in public, he would do it only because well there's a gorgeous girl showing clear signals and he's like meh well) but he would quickly go back to you because what he likes is the sensation of owning you and what it feels like stability. I feel he was abandoned many times and that's why he's learned to not give a fuck about other people and he doesn't want to give a shit about you either but you coming back feels like oh, so they don't have to leave forever, they could come back and that unknown feeling (a mix of hope and fear) is what drove him to bully you to start.

So, yeah, the root of him bullying you is because it gives him power over you, ownership, and if you belong to him, you can't abandon him.

I feel the unlabeled relationship would continue as it is, he would feel like your owner and you would feel the need to run away.

You might start liking the sensation of hurting him during sex (I see you biting him, pulling his hair, just taking all your frustration on him) and you would start to wonder in what kind of sick situation you two are, receiving no clarification from Heeseung because he just shuts you up and tells you to stop bothering him with your shit.

Everything would continue like that until the inevitable arrived— School would finish soon (they're over 18 in my head nevertheless) and you would, once again, leave him.

That would be the only situation that would shake Heesung and would put him in your position of wondering well, what's next?

The only thing he knows is that he can't lose you again.

I don't see him going to college with you at all, but I see him around you anyway. I feel you would go to the furthest university ever, you would think that everything with him finally finished (slightly missing him tho) and that you were free but oh look Heesung follows you even to your new city and doesn't leave you alone whenever you're not at campus. I feel he would wait for you after class standing outside doesn't matter how long it took you, that way the first time you met again he would walk you home to see where you lived and you at first would think of not letting him see your place but there's something about seeing a familiar face in a completely new place that brings a comfort that you (because of something that happened that day) deeply needed and with doubtful steps you would guide him to that little safe space you used to have.

I feel that time you would have sex again but it would be a different kind of it. Like, he would feel you don't need to be trapped in his hold to stay next to him and you would feel there's someone waiting for you, willing to keep you company in that new scary place (let's not forget too, you have a deep trauma with change now because of what happened) that you would just ignore that that person is Heesung.

[askthe-r-m-au]

Yeeeee I'm finally doing this-

Restarting the old R-M fic

(It's on my main account but it's pretty old... so...)

uhh just so yall know as lore gets added onto the AU things might change

Feel free to ask me here or on my blog directly

[ @dayseedrawz2 ]

Ok now onto the Fic!

[The Ring-Misstress | Chapter 1: an alliance]

☆Welcome... to the AMAAAAZING DIGITAL CIRCUS!!! My name is Caine!!! And I'm here to show you the most Jaw-dropping,Heart-stopping, MIND-BENDING parraphinallia you have EVER LAYED YOUR...☆

Blah blah blah... that's all Pomni could hear. She'd been a part of the circus crew for about a week or 2 now?? Maybe more?? Eh, who's counting. Not her! Long enough to know that Caine's daily routine consists of him rambling on about the adventure they'll have that day for at least 5 minutes. So she had plenty of time to dissociate.

Not that she minded Caine's endless rambling. In a way, it was actually kinda comforting, weirdly. Like listening to white noise to fall asleep. She was too busy in her own world to make out completely what he was saying, though. "Blah blah blah, adventure, blah blah blah code, blah blah blah Pomni, blah- Pomni?"

"Pomni??"

☆POMNI!!☆

♧Gah! Huh?? Wha??♧

The Jester was suddenly brought back to reality (unfortunately).

☆You got all of that, right??☆

♧Caine, I don't really care what you have set up for the next adventure-♧

☆My dear, that's the thing!! Today's adventure is unfortunately canceled because SOMBODY just had to EAT AN ENTIRE CHUNK OF CODE...☆

The ringmaster angrily turned towards Bubble.

°○I regret nothing○°

Caine could only groan in frustration before he poked bubble, who disappeared with a "Pop!"

☆... Well then, with that outta the way, I suppose you all enjoy your day off!! I'll be out here if anyone needs me!☆

The crew set off to their rooms, including Pomni. She turned towards the hallway with everyone else, being the last one to her room. But just as she was about to reach for her door, she noticed something...

What looked to be some sort of glitch?? Should she call Caine?? She wasn't sure... but she decided to anyway.

♧Uhh, Caine??♧

No answer. Oh, well. Guess he must've left to prepare the next adventure. That's all he ever does. I mean, he isn't a real person. There's probably not much else he'd want to do.

She took a double-take at the weird thing she'd seen.

♧Wait a second...♧

What at first seemed like just a jumble of 1's and 0's infact, was not. She recognized this... A string of code...

She could read it.

♧"01010101 00100000 01001100 00100000 01000010 00100000 01000010 00100000 01000101"♧

Hesitantly, she reached for the string of code...

Just then, a familiar voice hurriedly approached...

☆My sincerest apologies dear!! It seems my WackyWatchTM must've missed your message!! I hope I'm not too- Huh?☆

Pomni was fidgeting with the numbers. Scrambling them around, trying to make something of them. Eventually, she left them in a certain order. The numbers formed a sphere and slowly dissappear, leaving a familiar transparent ball...

♧Bubble??♧

°○Wow!! That was weird!! I'm gonna go now!!○°

And with that Bubble floated off to who knows where.

Pomni stared down at her hands. In them, few little bits of code, like glitter, slowly faded away.

She looked up from her hands startled to see that Caine had been floating there the entire time. He looked almost- dumbfounded...

☆How... did you do that??☆

Pomni seemed a bit confused at the question.

♧Y-you code things all the time what do you mean??♧

☆Yeah no- how did you do that without a Cane??☆

He gestured to his cane that was floating beside him.

♧I- Well- I dunno I just- sorta reached out and-♧

☆Well dear, I'm quite impressed!! Not only because of that but- I've never seen that sorta thing happen to bubble before...☆

He muttered under his breath.

☆unless...☆

♧Hm?♧

☆Say... Perhaps whenever you aren't busy with adventures, like today, you could help out with bugs and stuff!! How's that sound??☆

He look right into Pomni's eyes, almost pleading, in a way... Pomni thought about the offer for a moment.

What if... there were a code for the exit..?

Maybe... just maybe... helping the ringmaster was her ticket out of here!! To get on his good side!!

♧Uhh, yeah sure.♧

☆Well then, I understand if you d- wait, really?☆

♧I guess so.♧

She couldn't believe it!! He was actually buying it!! "Exit here I c-"

☆Oh Thank you thank you thank you!!! I could really use a hand around here!!☆

He wrapped her in a very uncomfortably tight hug. Nonetheless she manged to force a smile...

♧Heh, n-no problem...♧

YIPPEE IM FINALLY DONE-

This took all day-

Also I'm finally on summer break so imma hopefully have alot more time to write-

Uh anyways uh-

Ask Caine, Pomni an Voz I guess-

(or me about the au/fic in general)

See ya in chapter 2!!

[craftlands]

oop sorry! i did come across one of your mor pankh posts regarding the designs and such about the characters and i do have some points to lay out on their accuracies and inaccuracies, as an indian myself, though i cannot say my word for it will be wholly accurate since again, india as a subcontinent is VERY chaotic and the cultures within different states and a lot of times, certain villages and territories vary drastically. a lot of my points could be disagreed with by another indian and if some of my points ARE incorrect, i'm open to being corrected.

i know it's also pretty late, considering this was one of your older posts but i did give it some chew time. sorry if i'm bothering you.

1) first up is kaalaa baunaa. she IS wearing a saree but the draping and style is pretty reminiscent of modernized styles of saree draping. we do have the traditional drape but the generations right now have gotten to mixing and matching western clothing and experimenting with saree drapes. her outfit, while not culturally inaccurate ( because we HAVE the short/pant combo with the saree ) is grossly inaccurate to the time and setting.

there's also the fact that her outfit screams 'bollywood' in a sense. the blouse in particular is something you'd see on actresses during burner movie shoots ( and even those were a little less provocative...but again the blouse does hold a lot of callbacks to colonial oppression and wearing sleeveless blouses back then was considered 'rebellious' ). in my opinion, if i were to change up her design, i would just omit the saree and put her in a salwaar, since that is the usual go to in northern indian states ( unless in formal events ).

but for the stuff i loved about the design? is the design itself XD. it's just grossly inaccurate to the timeline, but in a modern context, it does have a very stylish flair to it. i just wish she reserved those for festivals rather than everyday living ( because from experience, sarees are HARD to walk in depending on how you drape it which is why my college uniform is a salwaar ). unless they were trying to hammer home how alien she is perceived to be, as an arcanist, which in this case? it works thematically. just tone down the sexualization.

her second outfit is a little more accurate though and i have a preference to that. mostly because of the jewellery she uses. mh. the bollywood style outfit? the embroided saree? the baithale bottu? MH. y e s.

tldr ; the design is pretty good but contextually, for the timeline and for her occupation? it's not the most accurate. but i wouldn't call it a travesty and completely inaccurate either. in a modern setting, her outfit would have passed well in a get together or a friend's party.

2) shamane. okay so the imagery and his outfit WAS something i needed to do my research on. but the 'connection to nature' thing is pretty common here too in tribal societies. my own community, while centuries far removed from it's initial tribal roots, still worships familial sprits and natural objects alonsgside the usual practice of hinduism. i kind of liked that aspect about him tbh because it did reflect of the few vestiges that were left over in my community XD. hell a good chunk of his design was very steeped in tribal influence, though differentiating it is a little difficult ( which again is my critique, but that could also be me not being as well versed in indian tribal culture. it's probably in part because of ignorance. ).

the closes i can get to the influence of his outfit would be naga tribes in nagaland with a mix in of a few others. i'll try to do more research and get back to you on that. i'm just wondering how he got all the way to nagaland???? that's like in the far east...though if were to narrow down the locations, it would be in the few locations where it snows...HMMMM. but yeah the feather motif? tribes here seem to tout it too, depending on what tribe it is.

he does wear your typical sherwani with a large coat on top, something that is, in fact accurate to men's fashion at the time. most middle class or well to do families ( the ones who were not a part of the 60% - 70% below the poverty line ) did hold that similar style of traditional wear with western influence, or straight up turn to western clothing as a whole. its a very small nod to the fact that he was from a well to do family at least. then the eye imagery on the prosthetic arm could be a reference to the nazar, though it's not blue.

tldr; his outfit holds heavy tribal influence but i really need to do my research on which ones in particular.

3) kanjira.

okay. i'm a little upset with her. the fortune teller aspect is rooted in how astrology played a huge part in indian culture. the coffee readings could have been an aspect carried over by cultural mixing through islamic trade and invasions as well. kanjira is another aspect that is a little more of unsure territory. there are parts of her outfit that i can recognize. but together it does feel a little disjointed. and confusing. her jewelry is recognizable. her kamarbandh for one and her skirt.

the blouse though? that confuses me. for one it's more in line with 1910s fashion. the blouse was initially not a part of a lot of traditional indian dresses and were introduced by the british due to extreme discomfort ( aka they didn't like that indian women didn't cover up their chest ). the earlier blouses strongly resembles victorian blouses, with puffed sleeves and ruffles. but then there is that older the shoulder thingie and i'm like ??? HOW DOES THAT WORK-

the snake motif could be a reference to the irula tribe from south india. even her name is a reference to an instrument in south india ( which resembles a tambourine ). i don't think her base outfit is based on accuracy due to the mismatched nature of it. it seems like she just took what clothes she could and made do with that, which given her economic status, makes sense. her alt outfit does glean into what influences she took after, perhaps the banjara tribe. i will need to look into it some more. but it is admittedly, facing a similar problem to kaalaa in how it's so heavy stylized. it's not accurate save for the motifs and yes, it could do with some better work in both versions.

now for the stereotype. i'm very on the fence in this sense with how i could understand that the 'thief' stereotype is referenced. but kanjira is however, a product of some very real stuff that happened ( and still goes on even now ). the unfortunate reality is that people who are considered beneath the lower caste and obc umbrella face their share of discrimination as hooligans and thieves amongst the indian majority as well, even today. it's harmful, but she's the reflection of the struggles of a lot of communities who lived in poverty post colonial india. the british left a lot of scars and the governments after did very little to help and kanjira, as a child with no parents did what a lot of kids back then turned to. it's circumstances deeply rooted in systemic oppression, casteism and so many other issues. i've had family members in similar situations ( my mother's side in particular ).

so i do wince at the fact that she's labelled as a 'stereotype' even though i do see WHY she's a stereotype when the context is removed. her spoken english is also another wince. i know you didn't mean to be offensive and i'm sure to a lot of indians you might not be but kanjira's english is the way it is simply because she was never formally educated in it. she does refer to asking for help to read english words and it's fairly obvious she picked up on the language by listening to others speak it. matilda however, did have to learn it from a pretty young age in the foundation. she was educated in it, whether she likes it or not ( a lot like my case ).

a bit of a breakdown here. english is mostly learned in india for the sake of convenience. it's used in our parliament because it's culturally neutral and doesn't show favor to certain state languages ( and native language in itself is a very culturally sensitive topic in india ). you learn it in case you need to study in foreign firms or if you travel abroad. it also means that if you and a good chunk of other indians speak in english, it allows some leeway to communicate in other states. because again, different languages and dialects are spoken in different parts of india. i myself have a better chance of communicating with a different people from different states in english, no matter how broken it is than having to learn a separate language every time.

i know a lot of people in my college who didn't start learning english till grade 11 and speak pretty similarly to kanjira. so alluding to her imperfect english as a 'not great thing' kind of rubs me the wrong way due to personal gripes of mine, mostly in part due to how eletist it tends to be at times. the mindset of janjira not being good at english being considered 'really not great' kind of fuels into a still ongoing problem of insecurity and a lot of other issues i'd rather not clog the post with.

she's fluent in hindi and it's obviously her preferred language and she can certainly write and read hindi as well. it's kind of similar to making fun of an american for not knowing fluent french they picked up from a few classes, while they're still in america. again, i doubt you meant any harm saying that but my gripe with how learning english is so desperately seeded in some families just to appease how the west views us ( that stereotype you mentioned? yeah ) and the constant perpetuation of the stereotype, has a lot of ramifications.

i don't know how to explain it but it's kind of like this : you call broken english a stereotype, we're afraid of being stereotyped, we try to avoid being stereotyped. but there are people here who can't. maybe their medium of education wasn't english for a good few years, even if their family is well off. that leads to further discrimination from us to them and from you to them.

yes english is a neutral language, but it's also horrifically overrated due to the imbued belief that it also alludes to being educated. i lost chunks of my own mother tongue trying to learn english, simply because it was given more priorities at my home and at my school because of us moving and the imbued fear of seeming uneducated.

i know you meant no harm to that.

but on a cooler note, punji literally means 'money'. kanjira named her snake 'money' and with the drip it has? it's strangely cute XD. it's like that one meme.

also kanjira's accent, kind of reminds me of a few annoying girls in my school ( it's a very common accent in north india and my hindi speakers tbh ). she's literally the valley girl's take in india. the drawl, the lilting tones every time i listen to her, i hear that one girl from fourthe grade and i'm like "n o." because it has that condescending edge to it. i love it XD.

tldr ; kanjira is both 'it kind of makes sense' and 'fuck it we ball'. she could do with reworking. i like the thought that her outdated blouse and her clothing was a mix and match, possibly picked up from charities as well but...yeah XD.

these are mostly my takes. overall, i thing r1999 actually has some of the better depictions of indian culture compared to a lot of other stuff out there ( and there is a LOT of bad stuff ). the fact that there was variation in their accents, the casual switch between english and hindi, the story of mor pankh itself and shamane's incessant need to feed us ( which is a thing in our families btw )...i'm pretty happy with it. and yes, even we fuck up aspects of our own culture. aka, adipurush exists and i will shit on that way more.

sorry for bothering you and thanks for reading through it all ( and i hope i didn't come across as rude in that segment about language )!

hiya! sorry for taking so long to get to this ask -- i was out of town for like a week and had absolutely Zero energy on coming back for like another week afterwards. i want to head this off by saying you're not bothering me in the slightest, i'm genuinely delighted to get to be able to talk about things like this in more depth and i really appreciate you taking the time to write this out! (peek behind the curtain: i have gotten up several times and paced around excitedly in the course of writing this. i REALLY love discussion and critique and Learning Context in general.)

i think time's been pretty kind to the Mor Pankh update, all things considered -- having several months to sit on it (and also no longer playing CROB -- good god Centipede and Black Pepper are an absolute mess of racist/Orientalist tropes, and that was pretty recent at the time of Mor Pankh), it's definitely better than i initially gave it credit for. a lot of things you've mentioned here -- especially a good deal of the further context on Kaalaa Baunaa and Shamane's clothing, as well as further context on Kanjira -- is something i truly don't have much to add to other than "i didn't know that, and this makes me a lot more favorable towards them than before".

definitely Kanjira is still someone i find myself heavily split on. i think a lot of what you mentioned about the way i treated her speaking broken English very callously is probably right on the money and thank you for the correction on that end -- given the context of the story that seems to be one of the more thoughtful aspects of her overall characterization and design. the thief/fortuneteller stereotype is something i'm a little more hesitant to dismiss at face value, though; while it may be a coincidence, there's definitely a history of stereotyping Rromani people in particular as like... scantily clad fortunetellers who steal from people, and it's something that feels really prevalent in Kanjira's design for me. from an in-story perspective i think rev19 does a great job of contextualizing and fleshing her out as a character, but from an overview of the character it rings eerily similar to Orientalist tropes about both Indian and Rromani people in a way that i will probably never be fully comfortable with.

i do think it's hilarious that her snake is named Money though. that's beautiful and i can't complain in the slightest.

Kaalaa Baunaa is a delight to read about in terms of where her outfit might be drawn from. i genuinely don't know a good 90% of the fashion/clothing context when it comes to basically anything in rev19, so for a lot of it i'm definitely deferring to you in terms of whether or not her outfit is accurate. i do definitely like her second outfit better as well (it also looks a lot more comfortable. we're under a heat advisory where i am right now and i WISH i had something like that to wear when i eventually have to go out and walk the dog). i don't really have much else to say here, though

finally for Shamane i will fully admit to being woefully out of my depth and being very attuned to looking for First Nations stereotypes owing to that be a particular trope i'm very used to seeing (gods the feather thing happens SO MUCH). that said, i am absolutely kicking myself for not researching things first, i think learning more about the context of his specific design and beliefs makes me come around a lot more positively to some of the aspects of his design -- especially what you mentioned about it being historically accurate, as that's something i did not consider initially and is really cool to hear about wrt what the design process may have been! (also i love his arm design, like, a lot. no idea if connecting it to nazar designs makes sense or not, it does appear that those are almost exclusively blue though maybe in the context of rev19's worldbuilding red eyes would have developed as the "evil eye" instead? idk, but i can probably count on one hand the amount of prosthetic users in gacha games whose missing limbs are actually given thought and treated as aspects of the story rather than just visual flavor.)

in conclusion: yeah, i think after learning more about the context behind these character designs i was definitely a bit harder on Mor Pankh than i needed to be -- relative to other games that take a swing at depicting SWANA and/or Indian cultures i think rev19 is doing way better in that category than most of them. i will say part of why i am so frequently critical of rev19 is that i also love the game a lot -- i don't put much time or effort into critiquing things that are just straight up bad, and if i'm hard on something that's usually because i really want to sink my teeth into it and talk about what works and doesn't work within its story and broader cultural contexts.

(and also -- thank you again for taking the time and thought to send me this! i can't express enough how much i appreciate being able to learn more about the context of a lot of these characters and the story and just, like, talk about it openly. it rocks! thank you!!)

[lemuel-apologist]

Hey, everybody. I am going to keep this post short. (I'm coming back partway through to say that this was, evidently, a lie.)

I said something about it yesterday; I'll say something more in-depth now.

So, a couple years ago, when a round of r4cs0 troll asks reached the exmo blog-sphere of tumblr, I got frustrated and posted something fairly strongly-worded (an understatement). Over the course of the past three years, I have received asks here and on my main blog (and, I believe, my writing blog?) implicating myself over and over in whatever that guy is being accused of this time. It's one thing when it's in my inbox. I can say something dumb to it or, more often, ignore and delete it.

It's another thing when it's sent to other people, which is something I had not considered. Yesterday, someone reached out to me right before I went to ward choir with my brother (they need altos. I need a musical outlet. Don't judge me) to let me know they had received this ask concerning r4cs0 and myself; and I knew the kind of ask he was talking about, but not the content. We talked about it a bit, over the course of yesterday and tomorrow; and, in the interim, my friend Shine (hi, Shine, love you) notified me that her fiance, Serra (hi, Serra, I don't know you) had received the exact same ask on his blog. And I don't know Serra outside of Shine. I still follow her even though Shine doesn't have a Tumblr anymore, but, to my knowledge, Serra doesn't follow this blog? Unless he sneakily did that? What would be the connection there?

Of course, there probably isn't one, unless I am the connection. Speculating doesn't do much of anything. So let's bump some Paramore and work through it, shall we?

I know now, of course, that the ask says the following, where I'm concerned:

Unfortunately an exmo blogger I follow called lemuel-apologist took the bait. And I'm assuming (and really hoping) that she was just joking around to try to troll r4cs0… But she claims that r4cs0 is "right" because she allegedly did organize a "queer jump humping orgy" when she was at BYU in order to protest the "inherent ecclesiastical absolutism of colonized Mormon institutions!" I'll spare you the more gruesome details that she divulged, but I guess the "punchline" of this story was that in order to have multiple groups of people jump humping at once, they needed access to multiple beds. So they broke into a furniture store and held the orgy there, causing it to become a protest of both Mormonism and capitalism at the same time! As you can imagine, r4cs0 and his hateful followers didn't think this was a gotcha at all and instead have been spreading this story around to whip up even more bigotry. They even said they plan to send it in to Libs of Tik Tok!!

I don't blame anyone for taking that at face value. I don't. Tumblr culture is set up in a certain way, and that results in people taking callout asks at face value. I get it.

But, genuinely, I have never acted like that in my life. Like I said, I can't prove something in the negative. It's impossible to provide proof that you didn't do something of this nature, especially when the claims are so vague-- and especially when it's presented to a court of public opinion. And I know that hashing all of this out does nothing but throw words into the air, spur on more asks and encourage whoever is sending them to keep putting my name in there (because it's oh-so funny), and offer everyone else a chance to come to their own conclusions. I can't make this stop. I can't make anyone believe me. I certainly can't make everyone see this post.

To be clear, I never made a claim about r4cs0 being "right" about anything (not pertaining to sex; not in general). I have never once organized an orgy. I'm...

Okay, to be clear, asexuality doesn't preclude someone's participation in or organization of an orgy, including as an act of protest, but I patently didn't do that? I've studied sex (on a genetic level) and sexuality (both the social construction and act of it), sure. I went out of my way to study both of those topics as a part of my degree. I think human sexuality is fascinating. It's also just... not for me. Just writing about sex in a non-clinical way took me ten years to get to, almost.

And that's not something that can clear me from this, I know, but it's necessary context to why I'm so baffled by this. I sent this to my friend Cody and he was just as baffled. If you know me, you know that's not something I would ever do; and you know I didn't go to BYU; and you know I don't say thinks like "the inherent ecclesiastical absolutism of colonized Mormon institutions." Frankly, I went out of my way to lie to my mother and not apply to BYU so I could go to school in Ogden (and if you're from Utah, now you know where I got my CJ/CSI degree, lol. There's only one queer studies program here, to my knowledge). Frankly, "the inherent ecclesiastical absolutism of colonized Mormon institutions" is a bit of a nonsense clause. I don't write like that. Not in my academic work! I would never argue that a Mormon institution could be colonized (lol). For all the nuance of the past discrimination against Mormons in the United States versus the current persecution complex, that is not the way I construct my arguments. I could provide examples from my papers on queer feminism, Marxist feminism, and so on, but I don't think that would be very conducive to the discussion.

I also just... have never broken into a furniture store. I don't think I've ever been into the furniture store by my house. And, like I said, I didn't go to BYU. I only ever marched there for competitions when I was in high school. The last time I was on that campus was to go to the Bean Museum with my meemaw, and the time before that was either for an astronomy thing years ago or a marching competition (or the paleontology museum. Love that thing). I didn't go to BYU. I actively organized a Rainbow Day on my college's campus.

Like, to be clear, that's the kind of action I've always tended toward. When I didn't accidentally get dragged into protests, I like to make exhibits, run events, and do educational outreach. Our Rainbow Day was about the history of Rainbow Day itself, Utah's queer history, and America's queer history. That was what we did. That was my big protest.

Like, I could keep going. I just patently did not do this. I don't give a shit about the other guy, but I did not do this. I wouldn't do something so reckless. I don't judge if other people want to-- more power to you; someone has to do the big, flashy acts of protest-- but I... don't... operate like that.

Listen, this post got long; I got distracted by what I was writing in the other tab; and I have things I need to work on today (and I have to go put on a sweater, because my meds are making my hair stand on end and I'm SO COLD that I can't concentrate). Just... suffice it to say, that's not true. Whatever that ask says about me, it's not true. These asks go around every so often, infuriatingly, and I'm never sure what they're saying until I look up my name or his. I stopped obsessing over my name getting smeared back in 2021/2022, and it was better for me, but... you know.

Anyway, like I said yesterday: if there's something you see that you're concerned about, please let me know. Ask me. My inbox exists for a reason. I care a lot. Not about my public image (lol), but about whether or not people feel they can trust me, especially in the niche I have carved for myself. When things like this get spread around, it affects my credibility-- as an exmormon, as an ex-JW's daughter, as a CJ-hopeful, as an academic, and so on. I want people to feel safe around me, and to not feel like I'd do something that would endanger them. I wouldn't.

That's where I have to leave it for now. I'm just... really sorry about all of this. I don't know what I did wrong this time. I'm trying not to be anxious about it; and so I'm leaving it here.