#unexpected problems with twin switches

[callipraxia]

Been writing some 'extra' scenes for Infinitesimal Variations this week, mainly as a form of exercise - trying to build up the writing muscles. These are scenes which always happened, but which I just didn't, in my commitment to sticking to only six narrators (...only six. Ha. Well, everyone knows how long that lasted...) write at the time. On which note: have Example 1, in which Tate McGucket decides to think things over like a calm and rational adult who definitely isn't sentimental and who would definitely never do anything as crazy as contemplate rolling up in your front yard and just shooting you:

If everything held steady, Tate thought - if everything worked the way it was supposed to, then the sun would go down within the next few minutes. If physics were working normally again, according to the rules - in that case, less time stood between him and it getting dark than it had taken him to tell that agent about....

If the numbers weren't lying to him, it was about to be dark. The trouble was, the numbers had already lied to him once today, and that meant he could not rule out the possibility that they would do so again. That he might have to operate without the numbers, at least for a while - and on the worst day possible for that to happen, considering how helpful good numbers were sure to be if he did indeed decide that he was going to go kill a man tonight. 

Breathe - in - one - two - three - 

Breathe - out - one - two - three - 

It had been a long time since he'd needed to resort to an exercise as rudimentary as breathing on a count to center himself. Was it just that he hadn't predicted the earthquakes (how? how could he have not predicted three earthquakes in a single day? He could predict the weather accurately a month in advance even in Gravity Falls; outside of it, he could probably hit a year without even exerting himself too much. He could predict the lottery. The numbers didn't lie, they never had, and they weren't supposed to be capable of it, but somehow, there had been three earthquakes, and he'd never seen them coming - ), he wondered, or would he have found himself confronted with this problem if the only unusual thing to happen had been the conversation with the agent? 

Does the name Stanford Pines mean anything to you? 

Do you know anything about his relationship to your father?

It was impossible, of course. Stan Pines was the man who had ruined his life? Who had ruined the lives of every member of his family? The Stan out on Gopher Road, the one who just made stuff up to entertain normal people - that Stan Pines? Stanford Pines, of all the people in all the world, was the person who Fiddleford had decided to abandon his wife and son for, all those years ago? His father's Friend - that was Stan Pines?

Impossible, logic assured him.

And yet.

He stood still beside his somehow still-functional telephone for a long moment, holding his limbs immobile through sheer force of will. The numbers span through his head, almost visible, never giving him any peace, but he ignored them as much as he ignored his desire to destroy something just for the hell of it right now. Finally, he turned stiffly and picked his way across the room which made up the majority of the bait and tackle shop. Found his stool, upside down and several feet away from where it belonged. Picked it up. Carried it back to its proper place behind the counter. Tried to put it down - and, in the attempt, he instead slammed it into the floor, its feet screeching against the wood as it slid almost a foot away from where he had tried to place it. 

Breathe - in - one - two - three - 

Breathe - out - one - two - three - 

Ignoring his now shaking hands, Tate pulled the stool back to its proper place and sat on it, bracing his elbows on the counter in front of him and sticking his fists under his chin as he stared straight ahead, far beyond the chaos of the remains of his business.

He had decided that, if he ever got the chance, he would kill his father's Friend several years ago, just after his mother had died - but just because some fed implied it was Stan, didn't mean that he could just tear off and kill Stan without thinking this through first. Feds did not always get it right. They were far less accurate than his weather predictions. Mistakes everywhere, not this one fluke which meant that something was profoundly Wrong, either with math or with the town. He could not kill a man just because of something a fed hadn't even said outright, but only...implied. 

Fiddleford McGucket wasn't really worth killing anyone at all over, if he was to be reasonable about the thing. From what his momma had told him, his father hadn't been of much account even when he'd been sane - always off with his head in the clouds, tinkering with impractical inventions while she brought home the bacon. And, of course, he'd abandoned his family, and hadn't even been man enough to come tell them to their faces that he was doing it, or why. Even aside from that, though, Tate had no particular reason to love his father. Not when Fiddleford, according to everyone, was the source of what it had pleased Momma to call Tate's gifts - that was to say, the numbers, the damned never-ending numbers that made life so boringly predictable outside of a place like Gravity Falls that he'd had to come here just to keep from shooting himself. The numbers that meant he, too, could spiral into...nothing, someday. Just one wrong move, and then - 

And yet, he was still Tate's father. And besides - there was more than sentiment in play here. There was also his momma's honor to consider - and avenge - and - all right, maybe she would have gotten the cancer even if Dad had never abandoned them, and maybe it would have killed her just the same - but she'd always talked bitterly about how they could have been rich, if Dad had just applied himself to something useful. Rich people didn't die as much as ordinary people, because they could afford doctors - better ones, too, than anyone living on a schoolteacher's wages ever could....

But he could not kill a man on no more evidence than he had right now. Which meant, of course, that he needed more information, and he needed it quick. How to get it, though? He'd asked around more than once about his father since he'd come up here, but all anyone had ever said was that crazy Old Man McGucket had always been here, and always old, and always crazy. Tate knew for certain-sure that this wasn't true, but he'd had to drop that line of inquiry lest it draw the attention of those culty freaks in town. What was he supposed to do now, then? Just...ask Stan?

Well - why not? As much as Tate hated the numbers, as much as he wished they would go away and let him live without knowledge of so much of the future and the constant fear of going insane the way Fiddleford had - as much as all that was true, they did come in useful, sometimes. He attributed his ability to usually figure out when people were lying to him to the numbers. He could count the little movements in their faces and eyes, the things most people - or so he had read - didn't usually notice. Wasn't any law against driving down Gopher Road at this time of evening and stopping to ask a neighbor a question or two, was there? Not even in the absurd legal codes of this hell-town. And it was in the Constitution of the United States that there was no reason why he shouldn't have a gun or six with him at the same time, in case of needing it. Nobody could say a word against him going out there and seeing what he could find out. If Stan hadn't taken his father away from them, driven the old man insane, and then discarded him like he was less than nothing - well, in that case, no harm done, except for a waste of time both of them could have used to pick up the messes the earthquakes had made of their places of business. And there were worse things - far worse things - than wasting a little time.

Slowly, Tate sat up straight and nodded to himself. That was what he was going to do. Now that he had a plan, he felt better, and so only paused long enough to load a shotgun before walking straight out to his truck with the weapon in question in his hands.

It was not his best gun, that shotgun. In fact, it was near enough to one of the worst. It had been his granddaddy's shotgun, back in Tennessee: at one point, the second-most valuable thing (after the cow) that Granddaddy had owned. He'd given it to Fiddleford when Tate's parents had decided to go west, an attempt - like so many attempts Tate's mother had made to him over the years, when she'd still been alive - to have some kind of connection with the son he'd never understood even a little bit; Fiddleford had presumably brought it to California for the same reason, but he hadn't taken it to Gravity Falls, though, and so it had ended up with Tate more or less by default after his mother had died. He'd never messed with it much for fear of it blowing up in his face, given its extreme age - but if he was ever going to use it, then he thought the present occasion seemed appropriate. 

[risetherivermoon]

here have a sparrow related rant :D (dndads ep 48 spoilers!!)

btw, my entire perception (or all together understanding) of sparrow oak has shifted after this episode-

i think unconsciously i saw the twins as completely different people, like wildly different from eachother, after season 1 and in season 2

but honestly- after we find out that sparrow is the one who enacted code purple, the conversation with henry and mercedes? i still see them as different characters, but i feel like they are actually way more similar than i initially thought

they're just both two guilt ridden idiots, and at first i was really confused why it seemed like sparrow would always group himself with lark when talking about who "ended the world" or whatever (i thought it was probably him saying it in solidarity or whatever, which i think is still partially the reason) but now he also basically did what lark did

i think thats whats heartbreaking to me, because henry immediately forgives lark after he releases the doodler, but sparrow is immediately told he will never be forgiven, and where lark has the motive of wanting to defeat the doodler and become stronger, sparrow has the motive of just wanting to protect his family-

im not saying this is out of character of henry, i definitely think this is how he'd react since he has the knowledge of exactly what code purple will do, and we also know that sparrow tried to lie to him to enact it as well, but its just- fuck

personally i think because of how lark and henrys relationship is in late s1 (and afterwards) henry probably was unconsciously more attentive to lark afterwards, trying to repair that broken relationship- and so his perspective of sparrow is different, sparrow usually goes along with lark and backs him up but he never actually argues with henry or whatever,

so when sparrow does something that he does himself, it seems so off and random to henry, personally i think if he had to think about it that lark would be the twin that what would be most likely to be the one to do it, a lot of it is sparrow acting on his own principle and we really don't see that often, (blah blah, its lark and sparrow not sparrow and lark, blah blah)

basically i think that it was so unexpected of sparrow that henry immediately freaks out and is more aware of the betrayal than he was back when the doodler was released,

im relistening to the mummy issues arc in s1, and was listening to scene of henry and darryl arguing about the pyramid, and i think that's really the thing yk? because henry's moral compass is more pointed towards being selfless, where sparrow seems to be on the opposite side of that in this situation

for example, henry wants to go and get arrested by neverwinter because they had let the pyramid fall instead of trying to save lark and sparrow from the omegadads, which makes sense that he doesn't approve of code purple because it would put faerun in danger, even though it would mean his family would be safe,

and then sparrow, who enacts code purple because even though it would destroy faerun, he and his family would be safe,

ive seen people compare code purple to the trolley problem- and honestly, i agree so much, its similar, where if the same amount of people are on both tracks but one has your friends and family/people you love on one side as well,

really sparrow was put into such a huge position of either way he will end up hurting someone, his 6-year-old son is attacked by a flesh hoard that he can get rid off by flicking a single switch, and of course he's going to do it, even if that means his parents never want to speak to him again and that he dooms another plain of existence to destruction

im just in love with how much this podcast spins morality around, it can be so incredibly philosophical for being a dungeons and dragons podcast about a bunch of stupid dads, it really makes you realize how complicated humans are

[late-to-the-party-81]

oooooo let's see. Drabble drabbly mcdrabbly drabble....

Hottie: Steven Grant Trope: One Bed Challenge: You may or may not know about the alters yet..... Yes, this is a selfish ask because I deserve nice things.

I love you.

Unconventional Alterations

AN: Hey Dani-darling! I hope all this fluff doesn’t make you sick!

Beta’d by @weekendgothgirl, dividers by @firefly-graphics, moodboard and banner by me. Spanish help by @aquariusbarnes

Main Master list | Challenge Master list

Summary: The hotel’s cocked up and you and Steven have got to share not only a room, but also a bed. He seems more worried about this than you. What’s he hiding?

Relationship: Steven Grant and Reader (currently platonic)

Word Count: 1.5k

CW: THERE WAS ONLY ONE BED, Fluff, Worried Steven, Rude Jake, Mediator Marc, some nasty words in Spanish, budding relationship, English slang.

“Bugger!”

You almost ran into Steven’s back, as he came to an abrupt halt in the doorway of the hotel room. His very British exclamation had a giggle bubbling up your throat until you peered over his shoulder and saw what had caused his outburst.

You scootched past him and dropped your flight bag onto the carpet.

“Bugger, indeed. Stands to reason though? They lost our booking and can only offer us a twin room instead of the two we’d booked, and now…” You gestured towards the one queen sized bed in the middle of the small room. Its gaudy red and gold bedspread was literally mocking you.

“I’ll go back down, Seshat. I’ll get it sorted, no bother. A quick nip down the apples and pears.”

Steven looked worried, as though you were going to accuse him of doing this on purpose.

“No, don’t worry, Ste. We’ll make it work. I’m too tired to argue with the desk clerk again.”

He still looked worried, wringing his hands.

“You’re sure? Yes, of course you are. You alway are. Ha-ha.” His little bark of laughter was forced and a thought came over you. Maybe he wasn’t worried that you were upset about sharing a room, and now a bed. Maybe it was him who had the problem; him who, for some reason, didn’t want to share with you.

You walked over to where he was standing, still in the open doorway. Nudging him out of the way, you shut the door, then steered him over to perch on the edge of the offending bed. You sat down opposite him, on the small couch.

“Talk to me, Steven. Are you okay about this? I get the feeling that you’re not.”

He cocked his head to the side, obviously thinking about how to respond.

“Okay. The thing is…I’m not really used to sharing a room with somebody else. Let alone a bed. I’m…erm… used to my own physical space. If you know what I mean. Bit of a Billy-no-mates, me.”

You couldn’t help your smile, and you lent forward to pat his knee.

“I get it, Ste. I’m used to sleeping alone too. Look at us; the Undateables, right? Well, all those other folk out there are gonna be missing out! And we’ll manage for tonight, won’t we?” His lips quirked up in a ghost of a smile. “I’d say I’d take this sofa, but from the way it’s digging a spring into my ass as I speak, I’m afraid I’m not that generous.”

Steven’s smile widened further, and he slapped his hands against his thighs, before standing up. 

“Well, in that case, I’ll use the bathroom first, if that’s okay? And you can decide which side of the bed you want?”

You nodded, and he rifled around in his suitcase, pulling out a wash bag and what looked like flannel pyjamas. He scurried into the en suite, and you heard the door lock with a ‘snick’.

While you waited for him, you investigated your small room. The TV only had a few basic channels on, but there were some radio stations, so you switched it to a generic one to cancel out the deafening silence. You pulled out the drawers on the desk, finding the small bible and the hairdryer. There wasn’t a lot else to check out in the small space, so you unpacked all the items you’d need now, and organised the things you’d need in the morning, then set about loosening the bed sheets. 

It was then that you heard an unexpected noise. Steven was talking to someone in the bathroom. For a moment you thought that maybe he was having a phone call, but then you spotted his cell lying on the top of his suitcase. Confused, you tiptoed to the closed door and put your ear up against it.

“What am I going to do? I’m gonna be next to her. All night! You two better bloody well behave! What kinda man do you take me for? I can be a gentleman. And we like her. I’m not gonna do anything to scare her off. Okay, it’s not really you I’m worried about. Qué dices? No es mi culpa que seas una marica y no le puedas decir. Do I even want to know what he said? Probably not.”

Now you were even more confused, because that was Steven, talking as he normally would, but he was also speaking with an American accent, and then also in Spanish, and each voice could easily be someone else. 

If Steven were triplets. 

Separated at birth.

And raised in different countries.

You shifted your weight to get comfortable, but unfortunately knocked your hip against the desk next to the bathroom door, causing it to creak.

“Silencio! Escuché algo. Creo que está afuera. What? Jake thinks she’s outside the door. Shitting hell, that’s just what I need. No. What are you doing? Marc… don’t do it… don’t…”

The door jerked open and you jumped back. There wasn’t really any way to make the situation look any different than what it was. Steven stood there in his flannel pjs, but he didn’t appear to actually be Steven. Yes, he looked like him, but there was something a little…off.

“Umm… are you okay, Ste?

“He calls you Seshat, doesn’t he? Egyptian goddess of writing and record-keeping? Suits you. I’m Marc by the way.” 

Steven/Marc held out his hand and smiled at you. This wasn’t the nervous, quiet Englishman you knew. No, this was a cocksure, smooth talking American guy. You took a step back and eyed him, suspiciously.

“Yeah, I catalogue all the museum artifacts, but can I just ask, what the fuck is going on?”

“Oh right, umm, how can I put this? I’m Marc. Marc Spector. I suffer from Dissociative Identity Disorder, or DID. And…umm.. Steven -Ste -is one of my alters.”

“You’ve got a split personality?”

The man in front of you winced.

“Well, that’s a bit of an outdated term, really. But although I have one body, I have three distinct personalities, with different thought patterns, and moralities, and likes and dislikes.”

“There’s three of you in there?”

“Hang on…”

His eyes narrowed for a second, his face darker. Dangerous.

“Hola, mi hermosa escriba. Es bueno conocerte. Desearía que Steven fuese más hombre para decirte lo que nos encantaría hacer contigo.”

“Erm… what?”

“That was Jake. He was… admiring you.”

“Your third personality is a pervert?”

“No, he’s just very passionate and he likes you. To be honest, we all like you.”

You stepped back and sat on the bed, heart racing and eyes wide.

“Ste likes me? ‘Likes me’ likes me? But he never said anything.”

“Well, he’s not the most confident. Jake and I have him beat in that department”

“And, err… is Steven still here? Like can I talk to him?”

“Oh yeah, sure. We don’t normally chop and change like this. It’s just this sharing a bed situation. It’s got us all a bit twisted up.”

He moved to the sofa, sat down, closed his eyes and took a breath. You could almost see a physical change to him; his shoulders slumping, his expression taking on a more worried look. You moved off the bed to kneel in front of him, taking his hands in yours. They were clammy.

“Ste? Is that you?”

“Err. Yeah. So… this is a bit of a cock up on my part. You weren’t supposed to find out like this.”

You let out a snort.

“You mean you were going to get around to telling me?”

“Well…if you put it that way… in a word… no.” He rubbed his hand over the back of his neck.

“Hey. I’m still here. I haven’t run away screaming. Not yet at any rate. Although, that Jake is a strange one.”

“Yeah. He’s very… passionate.”

You giggled. “So Marc said.”

You both lapsed into silence, still holding hands. The radio continued playing in the background. But there was a question on the tip of your tongue, something dying to come out and be asked aloud.

“Marc also said that you like me. Well he said that all of you like me. Suppose that makes your life a bit easier. What if two of you liked me but the other couldn’t stand me? Could make it awkward on dates.”

Steven looked at you, like a deer caught in headlamps.

“Dates? What? You’re joshing me, aren’t you?”

You giggled again. “I’m not sure what ‘joshing’ is, but I’m trying to say that, if you want, I wouldn’t mind going on a date with you, Steven Grant. Although, not being rude, it might be nice if it was just us two to start with. 

“Oh. Yeah. Sure. That would be peachy… I mean great.”

“Well let me get changed into my pyjamas and maybe we can have our first date now. Sharing a bed and talking; getting to know each other better. And you can tell me about the other two as well.”

“Isn’t it a bit unconventional for this to be a date?”

“You’re an unconventional man. You’re sharing your brain with two other guys.”

You rose, picked up your nightwear and wash kit, and walked towards the bathroom. Just before you went in, you stopped and turned back to him.

“And Ste, tell Jake that I understand Spanish and he should be nicer to you.”

Jake says:

What are you saying? It’s not my fault if you’re a pussy and can’t just tell her.

Quiet! I heard something. I think she’s outside the door.

Hello beautiful scribe. It’s good to meet you. I wish Steven was man enough to tell you what we would love to do with you.

Tag list: @christywantspizza @jobean12-blog @tuiccim @sidepartskinnyjeans @flordeamatista @krissy25 @bodeckersdiamonddoll @goldylions @luxeavenger @wheezy-stucky @doasyoudesireandlive @chemtrails-club

[unadulteratedtrashchaos]

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Episode 1308720: you hold your ass: a commercial break (from a tired idiot 05/05/2018) bimbo dumb horn mc pers slut grope mast fan you keep your ass

Episode 1308742: csw: sharon is more than a little curious (beginner from 05.08.2018). > episode 1308743: csw: this is that testosterone gives you (from dkc718 05/18/2018) swap magic ubea cursed swap wand

Episode 1308747: (as of 05.06.2018) list of celebrities: wwe ; futa

Episode 1308762: saria uvk: forest, revised (dated 05.06.2018) mem real fanfic: legend of zelda; wake up with curves

Episode 1308767: note: pete will become a whore (from anonymous51 05/06/2018) exh is suitable for

Episode 1308770: d-gals/ miranda: sharon mccormak entered to see them (by by bonkers 05/05/2018) fur exh grope hunlation fan fan fanfic: bonkers; biker miranda

Episode 1308779: april o'ninin in the dark: april leaves a terrible situation. (Master of the soul 05/07/2018) mc exh ff messy poly fantasy fanfic: tmnt/oz; april in the uza

Episode 1308780: april o'nil in the dark: hot sex, wine, blackjack and strange girls. (Master of shower 05/06/2018) be catg mb fur gaters. April in uza

Episode 1308790: sharonmorph: to a dark network (from dkc718 dated 05/05/2018) the magic ring of the transformation ubea ii

Episode 1308793: jim: jim mcnatt from the weekend: “sausis war” - part 2 (mr. Filler (mrfiller@zoho.Com) 05/06/2018) ag - this is the height of hg lip pe beaut horn ubea jim mcntta from the weekend

Episode 1308795: porn virus - beginning (according to alurion 05/06/2018) root [root] porn virus

Episode 1308799: dfh: jim finally woke up. He discovered that he kisses him on the floor (outbuildings on 05/07/2018). Disease (according to the brick program 05.05.2018) list porn -virus

Episode 1308812: jim macnatta day: long legs of the law. (Mr. Filler (mrfiller@zoho.Com) 15.05.2018) ag amarem heg hg hg mg pe beaut hump horn pers smart ubea jim mcnutt's day off

Episode 1308816: hhl invasion: love ru (from hc 05/06/2018) groma root root [ root] fanfic: love ru; happi high lord

Episode 1308818: hhl more than the anime settings (from lumitiel from 07/01/2018) fanfica reload: object of the ghost mikami; happi high lord

Episode 1308820: hhl to love-ru: snacks on the maid (from hc 05/27/2018) fanfiction of the horn grope: love ru; happi high lord

Episode 1308825: titnossis momo: improving the twins -schools (from hc 06/05/2018) be horn mc grope fanfic: love ru; secrets titnosis

Episode 1308834: titnosis momo: catch the younger sister (from hc from 07.07.2018) fanfin horn mc: love ru; the secrets of the ththnose

Episode 1308841: note b: i'm going to remove this person directly from our whore (in filling on 05.06.2018). Real fit in

Episode 1308848: jasmine and rasul: jasmine made another bad deal with a cat (from bonkers from 08/05/2018) ag be pr fanfs of the magic magic magic: aladdin; jasmine

Episode 1308850: the full database hucow dc: harley and ivy plan to change the world. (Drake g. Reve 05/06/2018) fanfiction of fans: dc; hucow database

Episode 1308858: anime/manga camera camera (until 06/06/2018) list of fans pornographer's camera

Episode 1308863: hucow dc: power girl ( from anzalelet 06/22/2018) mc fan fanfic: dc; hucow database

Episode 1308868: note: on the registration stand (from anonymous51 05/05/2018) real fit

Episode 1308873: princess pich queen scepter: just tell me she, what is happening (from an unknown cut 06/03/2018). Queen's scepter

Episode 1308879: lesbian shard konatsu - lesson 1: clothing (from trithan 01/15/2019) eastern fan fanfic with a forent: ranma 1/2; lesbian char

Episode 1308882: ntr 1/2: the long -awaited climax (according to the cross on 06/06/2018) tgg tgg tgtf horn mf mf mf humil ntr fanfica: ranma 1/2; ring of netorare

Episode 1308895: saria vuvk: something evil that happens (10/25/2018) fan fiction: legend about zelda; awakening with curves

Episode 1308898: koknosis high school dxd: depressed occult research club (cross c 05/05/2018) mc fanfic: secondary school dxd; koknosis

Episode 1308905: double problem - tugin in your own juices (from tretan 08/05/2018) fanfica of fans: ramma 1/2; double troble

Episode 1308907: perverts in denial - pre -climax climax (from tritan 05/26/2018) fan fiction: runma 1/2; perverts in denial

Episode 1308911: emperor atar - chilly -posem (from trithan 05/29/2018) fanfing horn: urusei yatsura; emperor atara

Episode 1308919: tlr indect: new clothes of rito (from uriel 11/21/2018) fanfic illa mc: love ru; unacceptable

Episode 1308934: user guide for women: this is my bedroom (from dkc718 dated 05/05/2018) www3.ffetish.photos ubea user guide for women

Episode 1308944: peach's haram manager: brank tech and its automatic functions (dated 05/09/2018) fan fan fanfic: mario; harem manager

Episode 1308950: valley of chastity: information of the nymph (from taran 05/27/2018) hg arise tat horn magic vailtement valley

episode 1308955: betv: jabba party is interrupted (cafiwam 06/06/2018) ag be bimbo fan ubea fanfic: star wars; be tv

Episode 1308956: in the morning oola sticks to obscene crumbs (6652 06/27/2018) bond grom. Battle fan of the tent: star wars; be television

Episode 1308957: what's in the pit? (Sexnvore 04/01/2019) nc tent vore vial ubea fanfic: star wars; be tv

Episode 1308959: the temple was walking the teenage of the titanium: (drake g. Zhnynetnik 08/05/2018) fan fans: teen titans; the temple of shelta

Episode 1308969: fetish samus costume: a familiar enemy ... Like.

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[liliansun]

no bc i can see sal being called a brat by jeno and getting it so rought and hello?? body worship was made for jaemin idc and yes haechan and renjun switches bc yes. and mark. whoo that boy is an enigma

minors dni!!

jeno would be so spiteful with it too but he’s so damn hot that anyone and everyone would drop their panties in a heartbeat if he said it. and omg JAEM w body worship,, dear lord and he’d watch you stare at his arms and he’d smirk and let you feel him up as he’s feeling you up and ooooo jesus. and don’t even get me started on the submissive twins. jun would be an unexpected switch,, twitching and squirming under your touch till he has no choice but to submit but haechan?? he wants you to force him to submit. he’ll fight you for dominance just to see you take control and fuck does he enjoy it every time. and mark,, dear lord i need to know what the fuck he meant when he said he has a really big problem bc i can be a problem solver?? i can figure out what x and y is,, i can help???!!!

[ackerfics]

the parent trap — levi ackerman x female reader — masterlist

people say that if one is fated to another, they would always reconnect no matter what lies between them. whether it be seas, a misunderstanding, parents who chose to go on different paths, or an unfortunate betrothal — they are merely obstacles that the pairing should tackle before finally having that happily ever after fairy tales depict for star-crossed soulmates. it's this belief that sparks hope for four hearts, all of which experience loneliness despite having the company of other people. thus, the conversations with the moon. years of talking to the ever-silver ruler of the night are not enough for four people who all wished for the same thing — to finally be in the arms of their other halves across the seas.

telling the moon their woes, two children thought they can solve their problem by switching places, determined to reunite their little family no matter what problems are thrown at them.

this is a story of two boys who discovered that they are connected in more ways than they expected.

contents:

part one ; two boys discovered that they are connected in more ways than they expected.

part two ; altair came home, only to find a thorn wedged in his little family.

part three ; caelum was too excited coming back home to london but found out that there was someone ruining their plan with their advances.

part four ; after assuming that everything was starting to shift further away from the plan, the people in the ackerman estate found out the identity of the boy mirroring the twin they know so well.

part five ; hours before caelum’s identity was revealed, altair was already found out by the one person he least expected would casually say his name, and the day just keeps getting worse from there.

part six ; it’s the most-awaited day of the meet-up, with levi thinking that meeting you will be just like what he imagined. when desperate times call for desperate measures, the two sides meet (minus you and hange) and added new agendas for the plan, and altair took it upon himself to save the day with another genius plot of his. here we go again.

part seven ; you four are together again.

part eight ; while levi is wooing you on your date, the twins find out that coincidences are laid out like playing cards in a game of poker when they followed lucas around california.

part nine ; it’s the camping trip but there’s a little change of plans, leaving you to stay in the house you once called your home.

part ten ; the last chapter before the epilogue. even though it’s quite unexpected but both levi and altair received quite a welcome from your family.

epilogue

bonus:

one-shots

on impulse

i wanna spend some time with you

somewhere (canonverse)

pleasant surprise (canonverse)

courtesy of the ackerman line (canonverse)

that's enough candy for the day (an au where it's the four of you since the beginning)

headcanons

reader and levi's past in university

altair ackerman headcanons

caelum ackerman headcanons

the twins making levi wear something of their choice

the twins giving a talk to their sister's prom date

hcs of al and cae with their little sister

tpt reader and the twins in s4

fanart:

the twins

the twins with levi

the twins with their little sister

[shemarmooresfedora]

Rebuilding Family

Summary: Y/N and Spencer were college sweethearts at Cal-Tech but once Spencer got accepted to the FBI Academy, he ended things deciding it was not fair to make Y/N wait for him. When they meet again years later, he discovers something unexpected.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

Warnings: a teeny bit of angst (resolved)

A/N: hi, loves! i will be changing updates to this to once a week because i would like to get my final other WIP out that has been sitting in my drive forever and i have graduation stuff. ALSO, i hit 400 followers!!! thank you thank you <3 here is the celebration!

Masterlist

Chapter 32

“Okay, everyone ready?” Spencer asked.

“Yep,” you smiled, grabbing Jo’s hand, “Just let me get a picture first.”

You pulled your phone out of your pocket and faced it towards Spencer, “Smile!”

Spencer turned sideways so both babies would be visible in the photo. He was wearing one of those double baby carriers so Ophelia was strapped to his back while Ollie was up front.

You all walked out of the room and down to the parking garage while passing nurses and visitors would ‘aw’ at the adorable family that had just practically doubled in size.

“Honey, can you put Jo in her booster seat in the middle first?” Spencer asked.

“Yep, up you go, Baby J,” you helped her into her new booster seat.

On both sides of Jo were now two newborn baby car seats so she could keep the twins entertained on the car ride.

You unstrapped Ophelia from off of Spencer’s back and littered her with kisses, already missing her in your arms. You buckled her in securely as Spencer did the same to Ollie on the other side.

Spencer got in the driver’s side and you got in the passenger seat. You both turned around to look at all your little kids in the back row.

Spencer turned to look at you with a huge grin, “We’re going to need a bigger car.”

“Spencer Reid, I am not driving a mini van,” you gave him a quick peck.

“Fine, I’ll just have to steal one of the FBI’s many SUVs,” he joked.

Jo switched her attention between both babies during the car ride, giving you and Spencer a play-by-play of everything they did.

“Ophelia is trying to squirm out of her blanket so I’m tucking her back in,” she stated.

“Thank you, Princess,” Spencer smiled, rubbing soft circles on your thigh as he drove.

“Ollie’s little hat is almost falling off so I am going to put it back on.”

“Thank you, baby, you are being such a good big sister,” you complimented her.

Once Spencer pulled into the driveway, Spencer grabbed Ollie and you grabbed Ophelia out of their respective seats.

“I’ll come back for the bags in the back,” Spencer said as he walked up to open the front door.

“I wanna hold her please,” Jo made grabby hands up at you with Ophelia in your arms.

“You can hold her when you are sitting, Baby J,” you assured her, patting her head.

Jo followed you up to the nursery, Spencer’s old bedroom. You had the cribs and other basics set up but you didn’t decorate because you were hoping to be moving soon. You and Spencer put an offer down on the house near JJ and Will’s and were waiting to hear back.

“The babies are going to take a nap right now and we are going to have lunch so say night night,” you lifted Jo up to give the babies a kiss before their nap.

Spencer placed Ollie in the crib with Ophelia, “I read up on co-bedding in one of the pediatric magazines at the hospital and if the twins are small enough, having them sleep together in the same crib can provide benefits including regulating body temperatures and sleep cycles, plus it soothes them.”

You and Jo gave the babies kisses and then you grabbed the baby monitor and switched it on.

“You coming, love?” you placed your hand on Spencer’s shoulder.

“One second,” he whispered, his eyes not leaving the two twins cuddled up together in one crib, “They’re just too perfect.”

-

You awoke to find Spencer in the rocking chair in your room in between the two bassinets. You had their cribs set up in the nursery for naps but they would do most of their sleeping in here with you guys until they were a few months old.

“What’s wrong? Are they hungry again?” you whispered, rubbing your eyes as you sat up.

“No, love. You can go back to bed. Ophelia was getting a little fussy which made Ollie fussy too but I think they just wanted some tummy time,” Spencer smiled softly as he had both the babies pressed to his chest.

“You are the best dad ever,” you blew him a kiss before resting your head back on the pillow.

You were lulled back to sleep by the quaint creaking of the rocking chair and Spencer’s loving whispers to the babies.

-

“Where’s Daddy?” Jo asked as you served her a bowl of oatmeal.

“He’s changing the twins. He’ll be down in a bit,” you assured her as you sat down across from her.

You watched Jo push around her oatmeal a little but not really eat any, looking up to the stairs frequently to see if her Daddy was coming down.

Spencer finally entered the kitchen with the twins, “Love, do you want to take Ollie?”

You opened your arms and accepted Ollie into your arms, “Hi, my little one!”

“Sorry it took so long. I was trying to get them properly swaddled but this princess right here was trying to escape,” Spencer grinned at the baby in front of him.

Jo pushed her still-full bowl of oatmeal towards the center of the table and scooched out of her chair, stomping slightly up the stairs.

When you heard her bedroom door close, you turned to Spencer with a disappointed look.

“Spencer, I know the twins are very exciting but you have to remember you have 3 kids, not 2. You hadn’t even said good morning to her yet.”

“I was going to!” Spencer insisted.

“And you called Ophelia ‘Princess’. That’s your nickname for Jo,” you pointed out.

Spencer sighed, he hadn’t even realized he had done that. He placed Ophelia in her bouncer seat and reheated Jo’s oatmeal. He even placed blueberries on top in the shape of a smiley face before heading upstairs.

Spencer knocked gently on the door. His guilt increased tenfold when he heard the little sniffles coming from inside.

“Jo, I know you’re mad at me and you have every right to be but may I please come in?” Spencer asked through the door.

He heard the sound of light footsteps and a teary-eyed Jo opened the door. Spencer immediately knelt to her level and set the bowl down on the floor.

“Jo, I am so sorry I made you feel forgotten because I got too wrapped in trying to take care of the twins. I promise it will never happen again. You are my only Princess, Jo. We’ll give Ophelia a different nickname.”

“I forgive you, Daddy,” Jo hugged Spencer.

“After you finish breakfast, we can do whatever you want today, Princess,” Spencer smiled.

Jo beamed as she scooped a bite of oatmeal into her mouth.

-

You knocked on Jo’s bedroom door where you heard whispers and scuffling of footsteps.

“What’s the password?” you heard Jo announce in a deep voice.

You looked down at the construction paper invitation with lots of glitter glue that was slipped under your bedroom door.

“Sunflower.”

The door opened, revealing a mini table with pillows all around it as seats. Jo’s tea set that Penelope had gotten her was beautifully arranged on the table along with little finger sandwiches and cookies.

“Oh my, how did I get so lucky to be invited to this exclusive tea party?” you smiled, “I know the invitation said ‘dress fancy’ so I hope this sundress is suitable.”

You gave Jo a little curtsy before entering. You had Ollie wrapped in a cloth baby bjorn around your front because he was taking a little nap but Ophelia was wide awake in your arms.

“You look like a Queen, Mommy!” Jo did a little twirl for you in her ruffle dress with strawberries all over it.

“So do you, my little Princess,” you smiled back.

Spencer was already seated on the floor in a full suit like he would wear to work. He shaved and slicked back his hair.

“Ah, I see the King has already arrived,” you chuckled, bending down to give him a kiss.

“Indeed, my lovely wife. I brought the bouncers up for the babies to sit in,” Spencer informed you.

You placed Ophelia in hers but kept Ollie in the bjorn because you didn’t want to disrupt his peaceful slumber.

Jo poured you all tea and Spencer added a little bit of sugar and honey to the tea cups.

“Do the babies want tea?” Jo asked, still holding her tea kettle.

“The babies can’t have tea just yet but thank you for offering,” you smiled, gently picking your cup up.

“Pinky’s up, Daddy!” Jo instructed.

It was rather comical to watch Spencer try to hold the tiny porcelain tea cup in his large hands.

“The tea is absolutely exquisite, Princess Josephine. I believe I will have one of these gourmet peanut butter and jelly sandwiches to go with it,” you smiled.

-

“I’m exhausted. Mommy needs a nap like the twins and Jo,” you chuckled as you fell back on the bed after putting the sleeping twins in their bassinets.

“Are you sure you don’t need a shower first?” Spencer questioned.

You looked at him and quirked an eyebrow.

“What? You know what your sundresses do to me,” Spencer whined.

“I guess I have a little energy left,” you grinned, grabbing his hand as you tip-toed to the bathroom to not wake the twins.

A/N: another reason i need to push the updates back is because i am going camping next week (i wish spencer could protect me from any bears)!

taglist (just ask to be added or removed!): @samuel-de-champagne-problems @g0lden-cth @spencerreid9 @averyhotchner @coldlilheart @k-k0129 @ickleronniekinsemotionalrange @harrystylesandthegoobs @cmily @jswessie187 @rem-ariiana @hoodpankow @doctorreiding @reidsfish

[ainyan]

Prompt #10: Channel

Channel:

to direct toward or into some particular course;

The air was restless. A frenetic energy shivered through the Rising Stones, disrupting research and distracting those trying to turn their attentions to the current problem plaguing the Scions. Y’shtola gritted her teeth and glared at Thancred where he sat next to her. “Don’t get me wrong,” she growled, “I am eternally grateful that she is here and not out risking her life against problems that others can handle just as easily, but if she doesn’t find some way to channel all of that energy, I’m going to lose my mind - or my temper.”

The gunbreaker blinked at the sorceress, then raised his head, his gaze sliding towards where the woman in question sat with Alphinaud and Alisaie. Her fingers tapped against the tabletop, her foot jiggled where it rested against her knee. Alisaie was nearly as bad; the red mage was clearly reacting to the other woman’s restlessness, fiddling with her focus and casting impatient glances at her impervious brother. Alphinaud was studiously ignoring both his sister and their companion, studying a book carefully.

Even Thancred, blind to magic though he was, could feel the roil of aether rolling off of her. “She probably doesn’t even realize,” he mused, watching the restless Au Ra as her tail switched back and forth, endangering the calves of any who dared to wander near. “What would you suggest?

“Maybe stage a little war for her to win?” came Y’shtola’s tart reply.

Thancred gave her an amused look. “Oh, I’m sure I could start a brawl somewhere. Usually it just takes me flirting with someone’s wi- hmm.” He frowned, rubbing his finger on the table as he cut himself off.

Y’shtola straightened. “You’re not seriously considering…”

He gave her an impatient look. “No, of course not. Knowing her, she’d just watch on and count it my just desserts for being a boor. No, but I think I know one way to ease her anxiety.” At the pale-eyed sorceress’s upraised eyebrow, he sneered, but declined to rise to the bait. “Wait here.”

He rose to his feet and she watched him with unalloyed curiosity as he stepped across the aisle separating their table from the twins’. As he approached them, Alisaie’s head jerked up and she watched him warily, while Alphinaud lifted his hand without looking up from his book. And in her chair, the Warrior of Light turned, lifting her head to meet his eyes. “Hello, Thancred,” she said, tilting her head to one side. “Did you need me for something?”

He bit back a not entirely unexpected response, instead offering her a toothy grin that brought a hint of wariness to her gaze. “Hello, Kal'istae. I do indeed,” he agreed lightly. “Grab your daggers. We’re going to go spar.”

Silence fell around them, and he could feel the eyes of the other Scions on him as she studied him thoughtfully. “You want to spar,” she finally asked, “with me?”

He lifted one eyebrow. “Surely the great Warrior of Light isn’t afraid to go toe to toe with a rogue who hasn’t lifted his daggers in far too many years?” He eased back on his heel, adopting a casual, cocky stance he didn’t exactly feel. The idea had sounded great in his mind, but gazing into those glowing lavender-edged eyes, he was all too aware that it had been years since last he picked up his daggers - and that she was the Warrior of Light. Trained by the reclusive shinobi of Doma, she knew things about fighting with blades he’d never even imagined.

Despite his confident pose, he had a feeling she could see his misgivings - or had some of her own. She shook her head slightly, her gaze apologetic as she opened her mouth to decline. Before she could speak, however, a voice rang out, “A match for the ages, by the gods! Our bout will be as nothing compared to this! Give him hells, Kal'istae!” 

Of course. Hoary Boulder was here. Even as Thancred gritted his teeth internally, other Scions began to pipe up their support of one side or the other, and an eager crowd began to form. Kal'istae gazed around at them with dismay, then lifted her gaze to Thancred’s as she bit her lip. “Just sparring,” he repeated. “You and me and our daggers. Please, I need something to take my mind off of this waiting.”

He knew that would do the trick; she might still have refused the crowd, but when he made it a favor, made it about helping him - how could she deny him? A dirty trick, his mind whispered, but the thought barely phased him. He’d sunk to lower depths in his life to do the necessary, and he’d go further yet if it meant helping her. She eyed him, then sighed. “Alright. A sparring match. I suppose,” she added wryly, glancing over her shoulder at her twitching tail, “we could all probably use a bit of release.”

He watched her as she scrubbed her hands together, studying them, then reached out, offering his own. She blinked at it, then lifted her gaze to blink again at him. “Come on,” he coaxed. “I’ve been wanting this a long time.”

Her gaze dropped back to his hand, then she slid her fingers into his, allowing him to pull her to her feet. “So,” she admitted, her voice low and her eyes not meeting his, “have I.”

“Really?” There was nothing feigned about Thancred’s surprise as he handed her to her feet and he stood there, still holding her hand in his as he stared at her. “You never mentioned.”

Her pale eyes were inscrutable as she raised her gaze up at him, her fingers curved lightly into his. “That,” she said softly, and he shifted closer to hear her words, “is because I value your friendship, and would not care to lose it because…” She trailed off, her gaze sliding from his even as she tugged her hand free. “Are you certain you wish to do this?”

He dropped his hand to his side, flexing his fingers. “I think it would do us good,” he murmured, and she met his eyes once more, “and I think it would do them good.” Her gaze flickered over his shoulder towards the eager faces of the Scions. “It’s been a long time since I’ve been jealous of you. You don’t have to worry about that.”

“I - how…” She floundered briefly. “I don’t know what you mean.”

Lines framed his eyes as he smiled. “Of course you don’t. Shall we, my lady?”

She hissed between her teeth, but Thancred’s smile only deepened and finally she sighed at him, shaking her head. “Of course, my lord,” came her reply, and it was her turn to smile as he started. “Best to take this outside, by the old camp. I’m certain we’ll have quite the audience.” Her eyes darted around the room and she sighed again. “Gods preserve me.”

Thancred snorted, falling in at her back as she started towards the doors leading out. “Isn’t that my line, o Warrior of Warriors?”

She cast an impish glance over her shoulder. “Do you think your prayers will avail you?”

Caught, he laughed helplessly as they passed through the doors.

[bounce-a-coin-off-your-witcher]

Baby, You Light Up My World

well I haven't done this trope yet...

sold to 1D au - modern au - absolutely a fluffy crackfic

I didn't do much editing, I just wrote this for funsies.

Please consider leaving me a comment since it is my birthday month. As both a bisexual and a Leo I desire nothing more than validation.

tw: mild panic attack

---

“Jaskier! You useless layabout!” his mother called from the bottom of the stairs. “Get down here!”

The young man dropped the book he’d been reading and jogged down the staircase from his room to the main floor. “Yes, Mother?”

“I had to pay the bills after your father died mysteriously so I sold you online.”

“What!?” Jaskier gaped, jaw dropping.

“Yeah, and your new owners are almost here.”

“My new owners!? M-Mother, what do you mea-”

“Go upstairs and get your shit packed,” the frowning woman interrupted. She lit up a cigarette and rolled her eyes in obvious annoyance. “That doorbell is going to ring any minute now and then my problems are over.”

The shocked teen wandered back up the stairs to his room, where he packed his meagre belongings into his old summer camp duffel bag and laid his father’s old guitar gently in its velvet-lined case. His mind raced with questions. Would they be nice people? Would they be cruel? Would he be happier with these strangers than he was at home or at school? Who were they? Was this even legal?

Jaskier nearly jumped out of his skin when he heard the doorbell ringing. He grabbed his bag and his guitar and slowly made his way to the front door. His mother was chatting quietly with several people - men, judging by their low voices - and his heartbeat skyrocketed.

“C’mere, boy,” she ordered, snapping her fingers with impatience. Jaskier scurried forward. “Meet the people who are taking you off my hands.”

“Hello, Jaskier,” said a familiar voice. His head shot up, blue eyes wide and confused.

“G-Geralt deRiv!?” his gaze moved from one man to the next in quick succession. “L-Lambert… Eskel?”

It was his favorite band, Wolf Direction.

---

EARLIER THAT MORNING

---

“Why the fuck are you buying another band member?” Lambert asked, glancing over Vesemir’s shoulder to read his laptop screen. “Why not just hold some open auditions?”

“Because this is a fanfiction, Lambert,” their manager huffed. “And this is how Geralt and Jaskier's meet-cute has to happen.”

“Oh.”

---

BACK TO THE STORY

---

Lambert took his guitar and Eskel took his bag while Geralt herded Jaskier onto the large tour bus parked in his too-short driveway. Jaskier was still in shock; his limbs moved on autopilot as he sat down on the surprisingly comfortable couch that stretched along one wall of the bus, beneath the tinted windows. Geralt sat beside him but kept his hands to himself, waiting for the old man with the mustache to speak first.

“Well hello there, Jaskier,” the stranger greeted warmly. “I know this is an unconventional situation but I wanted to personally welcome you to Wolf Direction. I'll admit that it's all a bit sudden and unexpected, but we needed someone with your gentle disposition to help balance out the boys and you're almost the same age, which is convenient.”

"I'm-" Jaskier blinked owlishly. "I'm joining the band?!"

"You're going to be the new front man," Lambert winked.

Jaskier, completely overwhelmed by the events of the past half-hour, passed the fuck out.

Geralt startled a bit as the brunette boy slumped against him and he gave Vesemir a worried glance. “What the fuck?”

By the time Jaskier managed to regain consciousness they were already nearly a hundred miles away. He sat up from the arm of the couch and stretched, listening as several places in his lower back popped into place. “Huhn?”

“Oh!” Eskel grinned, setting down his X-Box controller. “You’re awake!”

“And you’re Eskel.”

“Yeah… I sure hope so.”

“Cool.”

“Please don’t faint again!” Eskel pleaded, propping the smaller boy against a pillow and covering his lap with a blanket. “You scared the shit out of Geralt.”

“Sorry,” Jaskier blushed, allowing himself to be prodded and adjusted. “I didn’t mean to… It’s just been a very weird morning.”

“It’s going to get weirder,” Lambert added, slamming the bathroom door closed behind him. “Because now we have to know which one of us you’d like to bunk with. There are only four bunks and the bus driver has the couch.”

“Uhhh…” Jaskier’s eyes flickered between Eskel and Lambert. “I’ll just sleep on the floor.”

“I’ll take the floor,” Geralt offered, poking his head out from behind one of the bunk curtains. “He’s new and probably terrified. He’ll need more sleep than I do after the day he’s had.”

“I- No, it’s-” Jaskier tried to argue but none of the band members wanted to listen.

“Alright, floor for Geralt. Jaskier can have his bunk.”

Jaskier felt wrongfooted all over again. “Th-Thanks.”

“No problem. You any good at FIFA?” Eskel asked, offering Jaskier a second controller. The young man shook his head and settled back onto the couch.

“I brought a book,” he smiled timidly.

“Oh, you and Geralt will get along swell,” Lambert teased, tossing Jaskier the duffel. “The bus has been infested by bookworms!”

“Wouldn’t hurt you to read a book or two,” Vesemir said over his shoulder. “Might actually manage to fill some of the space between your ears.”

“Fuck off,” Lambert groused. He fumbled his way into his own bunk. “Let me know when it’s time to eat.”

Jaskier, still surrounded by a cloudy sort of surreality, opened his book and lost himself in the pages.

---

TWO WEEKS LATER

---

Jaskier had forgotten how much he hated thunderstorms. He whimpered as another loud bang shook the bus and rattled him in his tiny bunk. Thankfully the driver had parked them for the night, so he didn’t have to worry about crashing into a tree during inclement weather. He was worried about blowing away in the wind, however.

“G-Geralt?” he whispered, poking his head out from behind the dark curtain. Geralt blinked up at him from his air mattress on the floor, still mostly asleep.

“Hmm?”

“Wanna share the bunk tonight? I-” Jaskier licked his lips anxiously and took a deep breath “I’m scared of the storm.”

“Sure,” Geralt lumbered to his feet and slid onto the twin-sized mattress next to Jaskier. Their legs were pressed together and their faces were only inches apart. “Sorry. Bit of a tight squeeze.”

“I don’t mind,” Jaskier muttered. He was glad that the darkness kept Geralt from seeing the way his face had gone red from being in such close proximity to his favorite member of the band.

He and Geralt had been dancing around each other lately - terrified of their very obvious and very mutual feelings for each other - and Jaskier was glad for an excuse to be near him again. Geralt spoke up again: “Scared of storms?”

“I used to have the attic bedroom at my house,” Jaskier explained, keeping his voice low. Eskel was right above them, snoring away. “And once, during a storm, a tree branch flew through my window. I haven’t been able to sleep through the sound of thunder since.”

“I’m glad you’re alright,” Geralt replied. One of his heavy arms came to rest over Jaskier’s ribcage, holding him without holding him; merely a comforting weight to settle his nerves.

“Me, too,” Jaskier smiled. “Sorry for interrupting your sleep. I’ll be quiet now.”

“Hmm,” Geralt hummed his acknowledgement. He tucked the younger man’s head beneath his chin and started humming an actual tune, running through all of Jaskier’s favorite Wolf Direction songs until he started snuffling quietly. “Sleep, Jask. I’ll keep you safe.”

And he did.

---

TWO MONTHS LATER

---

"Thank you so much, Detroit, we loved being here!" Jaskier waved to the audience and let the microphone drop. He was panting for breath and sweat dripped from his bangs into his eyes, still... this was the happiest he'd ever been. Geralt wrapped a strong arm around his waist, waved to the screaming crowd one last time, and escorted Jaskier into the wings.

"You did great, babe," he smiled. Jaskier grinned up at him.

"Really?"

"You always do."

"You guys are disgusting," Eskel made a fake gagging sound.

"I think it's adorable," Lambert argued. They switched sides every week or so to keep things interesting. "They were made for each other."

"Whatever," Jaskier stuck his tongue out. "This is a found family strangers-to-lovers fic. We can do whatever we want."

"I want to kiss you," Geralt suggested. Jaskier grinned again.

"Sounds like a great ending to me!"

So they kissed, and it was beautiful and sweet and everything Jaskier had ever hoped for.

[pod-together]

Day 4 Reveals!

Like Some Lonesome Child [text, audio]  (Marvel Cinematic Universe, Iron Man (Movies), Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)) written by Politzania, performed by EllaCx Summary: When a spell from Loki turns Captain America into a small child, Tony finds himself his tiny teammate’s  caretaker.  The trust and affection this version of Steve shows him makes Tony long for more; but when the purpose of the spell is revealed, Tony realizes what Steve has been missing in his life as well. just to wait for a while  (Critical Role (Web Series)) written by sabinelagrande, performed by blackglass Summary: There is a beautiful plant in the Feywild. Many, in fact. Percy and Vex can't look away. Twin Suns  (Merlin (TV)) written by Robin_Fai, performed by dreaminghour Summary: She did hear whispers of magic sometimes when she passed in darker corners of the world. Some people still practised the old ways in secret. And sometimes, around a shared fire of an evening, they could be plied with ale or mead and coerced into telling of a traveller who wore magic like a second skin. They spoke of his kindness, of his sorrow, of eyes that blazed gold as the sun. They never spoke his name, but Morgana felt sure it was him – Emrys – Merlin. When Morgana wakes out of sync with the world, alone, she finds that Camelot is not what she remembered, and neither is the man she long knew as both enemy and friend. Now, in an age after Arthur, she and Merlin are the only ones who remember. Pieces of You  (Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling) written by Janieohio, performed by PhenomenalAsterisk Summary: Harry and Draco have moved in together, but Harry is hiding the truth of his childhood from Draco. Draco struggles to understand until a phone call from Harry's estranged cousin changes everything. The Avenging Director  (Marvel 616, Iron Man (Comics)) written by Missy_dee811, performed by Cathalinaheart Summary: A look at Anthony Stark’s Directorship at S.H.I.E.L.D. Life and Its Infinite Surprises  (Tortall - Tamora Pierce) written by minnabird, performed by Aliteralgarbageheap Summary: “Before I forget,” she said, “I promised to bring letters.” She handed the packet to Neal, who immediately seized it. He gestured for her to take a seat, then began sorting through the contents of the parcel. Most he set aside, but he opened two immediately. The first made him smile. As he read the second, color drained from his face. He threw the letter down and stood, pacing away from Kel as he raked a hand through his hair. “Neal?” she asked warily. Kel brings Neal's daughter home to Queenscove after her page trials. Rui of Queenscove knows exactly what she wants; the problem is telling her father about it. It Takes Three [text, audio]  (Marvel Cinematic Universe) written by poppetawoppet, performed by Cass_Caelis Summary: way back in 2011/2012 timeframe, I believe I prompted "5 times Steve walks in on Clint and Natasha fonduing, and 1 time he joins in" This is more like 1 times Steve walks in, 1 time they cuddle, 2 times he overhears them, and one time he joins in. A very rare NSFW work from me. Starts out post Avengers, in the inevitable they all live in the tower together dream, and goes from there. All There Is  (Leverage, WandaVision (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe) written by FlutterFyre, performed by Tipsy_Kitty Summary: A chance encounter leads to unexpected relationship advice from a surprising source. Walk Away (from all you’ve never known)  (Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types) written by stereden, performed by DyingGravy Summary: You’re twelve years old and you do not care for immortality, do not know nearly enough about the goddess offering it to you to pledge your loyalty to her, but she offers you the freedom you crave so badly, the freedom to find out who you are when you are not being sister-mother-parent-caretaker, and you grab it with both hands. You’re twelve years old, and you take an oath you only half-understand, an oath you’ve only half thought through, and suddenly you’re stronger and more confident and everything seems so much brighter. Your brother isn’t talking to you, but he is talking to others, chattering their ears off with his unending questions, and you know he will be fine. You are Bianca di Angelo, sister of Nico di Angelo, and you’re twelve years old and just this once you chose to be selfish. [Stop. Pause. Switch tracks.]

[quirklessidiot]

Title: coward :: brat Pairing: Y/N x Miya Atsumu  Genre: angst, romance, and very slow burn [ex to lovers au] Warnings: Cursing, alchohol, mentions of unprotected sex, unplanned pregnancy, and mentions of abortion

Synopsis: you finally see Miya Atsumu after six years, meanwhile, he feels pain when he realizes that you settled down with someone else that wasn’t him. notes: i um want to thank yall for supporting this story im- crying T-T I’m happy to inform everyone that i’ll be updating this twice a week every monday and saturday! yay!!! i was able to finish editing and im writing the last two chapters now. stay safe and big love to each and everyone of you <3

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“...Uh, Youta-Kun, Yuuto-kun, I thought you guys weren’t allowed to go.” Sugawara laughed nervously, knowing all too well where this would lead. He’s familiar with over-enthusiastic boys, in fact, one of those over-enthusiastic balls of sunshine was here right now entertaining them.

“K-Kaasan says it’s alright.” Yuuto lies but Sugawara quirked his brow, it was so obvious that he was lying.

“Yep, she did!” Youta grins, trying to help his twin but like him, he’s failing drastically.

“Then you won’t mind if I call your okaasa-”

“No!” Youta and Yuuto yell in unison. This made other people turn their way, Miya Atsumu watched the pair in amusement from afar. He noticed that they were late and that Sugawara had caught on to their scheme of joining in even without the parental consent, “We won’t join!” Youta proclaims, “Right, yu? W-We’ll pick up balls!”

Hinata feels his eyes glimmer at those words and decides to help them convince Sugawara but in the end, the twins were forced to be benched while the grey-haired teacher had to go back to the faculty to call you.

“It’s alright,” Hinata ruffles both their hairs, “We’ll try to come back next time and I’ll be sure to help convince your ‘kaasan.”

“Hey don’t plant false ideas in their head, Shoyou.” Atsumu grins, lazily jogging to their side. He directs his gaze to the twins that seem to oddly remind him of him and ‘samu when they were younger. The boy's gaze lingered a bit too long on him,unlike other kids who stared at him in awe, these ones were seething, “What are ya lookin’ at, kid?”

“Wow,you’re as mean as your brother.” Yuuto notes, eyeing him up and down. 

“Yeah.” Youta echoes.

Atsumu quirks a brow, this was quite the new reaction. Never in his life had a kid told him that he was mean as ‘Samu also how did they even know his twin brother?

“Now, now, don’t you think you should cut me some slack?” Atsumu tried to jokebut the twins remained unamused by the blonde’s antics, somehow Atsumu felt a sense of familiarity from their monotonous reactions.

“No thanks.” Yuuto crossed his arms, “The fake Atsumu made ‘kaasan cry and since you look like him, you might make ‘kaasan cry too.”

“What he said!” Youta agreed loudly, copying his older brother’s action.

Atsumu was just plain confused now, he admitted that Osamu had an attitude sometimes when he was annoyed but letting a mom cry in front of her kids? That’s definitely new and not-so ‘samu like (after all, he was apparently the nicer one between them)

“What’s the name of your okaasan-”

“Youta-Kun, Yuuto-kun, Your mom will be picking you up at the gate! Please go there now.” Sugawara cuts him off, Youta and Yuuto stand up and eye him for a bit.

“We’ll defeat you and your brother! Just wait and see, we’ll be as big as you and that other jiji!” Yuuto exclaims and before Atsumu could retaliate, they’re running off to the opposite direction. Hinata was laughing beside him, clutching his sides because apparently he was too petty while Sugawara looked at him with an apologetic expression.

“I wonder why L/N-san didn’t allow them to go, she’s usually very supportive of their hobbies, especially volleyball.” Sugawara frowns, suddenly voicing out his thoughts. Atsumu felt his shoulders stiffen at the sound of that familiar name. 

Osamu revealed he saw you last week then these kids suddenly confessed that his twin made their okaasan cry, he’s never seen you cry throughout your relationship (save for that night when you first me but you guys weren't together yet so that didn’t count). Maybe he was mistaken? it might be your relative or a common name.

After all, you were clear about not wanting a family.

“You know their mom well?” Hinata inquired,  Atsumu seems to be listening closely now, wanting to confirm if the person that Sugawara was talking about is you.

“Oh yeah, we're around the same age so I’m much closer to her than the other moms.” Sugawara blinks, “Those boys have to listen to their okaasan more. She’s raising them on her own since their dad died before he even got to know that L/N-san was pregnant. She seemed to be longing for him whenever he’s mentioned.”

A crease appeared on the blonde's forehead as he was suddenly in deep thought. It couldn’t be, right?

“Uh, Sugawara-san, may I know the name of the mom? Her last name sounds kind of familiar.” he questions, pretending to be nonchalant but inside, he feels like he had his heart on his throat.

If it was you, he’d feel those things that he desperately tried to hide behind his confident jokes and laughs. 

The pain.

The pain that you chose someone else and was open enough to the idea of starting a family. If that guy probably hadn’t died, you’d be together, happily raising those boys he had just met a while ago. Happily married, something that Atsumu tried to mention one fleeting moment while you were together back in college but you immediately shut the idea down and left him a month later.

The pain that you fell in love in a span of moments unlike Atsumu who relentlessly tried to gain your favour and follow you around like a lost puppy.

“Oh, her name’s Y/N L/N.”

Thankfully nothing unexpected happened after what the twins did, they ended up having to pick if they wanted their video game rights removed for a week or cancel their plans with their favorite ojisan who was coming by a few weeks from now, they chose the first one on that.

They had even mentioned that they met the real Miya Atsumu and although you felt like your heart lurched out of your chest and your shoulders stiffen at the mention of that man --- their father---  they simply had called him a rude jiji like his brother much to your relief.

“L/N-san, we seem to have a problem.” Aiko frowned, handing the papers to you, “The director of the advertisement department wants a bigger budget, do you mind running it through him again? You have to go to the studio though, I heard they’re doing some photo shoot now.”

You nodded in reply, taking the papers from your co-worker. The studio was a bit far so you ended up having to commute to get there, “What a nuisance.” You muttered, you needed to buy a second-hand car soon when you had enough money. It would definitely be easier for both you and the boys, “Uh excuse me? Is Nakamura-san here?” you asked the secretary on the front desk.

“And who are you?” the secretary snapped back, still typing away on her computer.

“Y/N L/N from the finance department, I have to run through the new budget liquidation with him.”

The secretary one-eyes you and the ID on your neck for a split second, “You better be quick, the boss wants only five minutes per guest since he’s personally handling the shoot today.” was all she replied, handing you the pass. You muttered a quick thank you and made your way up to the studio, whoever the model was today, they must’ve been big for Nakamura to handle them personally.

“Oh-ho, is that who I think it is?” a very, very familiar voice calls out.

“Inunaki-san.” You greeted, trying to maintain yourself, were these the big clients that Nakamura was handling? The black jackals? good fucking gracious, god must hate you.

“Wow,” he shakes his head, feigning amusement, “You’re still so calm and cool.”

You narrowed your eyes at the insult but you waved it off, “And you’re playing for a national team, congratulations.” you replied in a blank tone, your senior probably knew what happened between you and his fellow member. You wouldn’t be the least bit surprised if he reacted the same way as Osamu did.

“We’re actually doing a shoot now, would you like me to call Atsu-”

“No.” your usual calm tone switched to a colder one, “I’m working now and so is Miya-san, please don’t bother yourself.”

“Gee,” he raised his hands, signalling defeat, “Just say you don’t want to see him. You don’t need to be so cold to me, my dear little kohai.”

“I have to go back to my job, I’m on the clock here.” You ignored his previous statement, “It was nice seeing you again Inunaki-san.”

Before you could give him a chance to reply, you headed towards the studio. You took a deep breath and mentally calculated to three.

one. 

It’s been six years, Miya Atsumu would ignore you. He wouldn’t care about the girl who left him out to dry in college. He’s got a girlfriend now, a model who has legs for days and looks ten times better than you and acts more like a girlfriend than you ever did.

two.

Yes, that’s right, he wouldn’t care.

three.

You entered the studio, you could feel the air tighten around you as soon as you heard that laughter. The one you used to hear everyday and never get tired of. For all the laughs you couldn’t do, he’d do it for you and boy, was he patient around you since you didn’t smile a lot back then (who were you kidding? until now you still had the same problem except when the kids were around)

You want to stop and stare, you want to admire him and his glory that you were very much proud of.

Yet your legs continue to carry you to your boss, the laughter seems to have ceased and you could hear someone asking him what was wrong.

“Oh, L/N-san?” Nakamura greeted you, “You’re here for the renewal of the budget?”

You nodded feverishly, your legs seem to be turning into jelly because you want to collapse from the nervousness and thank god that you wore some make-up before arriving here, otherwise, they would’ve noticed how pale you looked, “Everything seems to be in order,” He nods, scanning the sheets and handing them back to you, “Are you busy right now?”

You glanced at the wall clock, checking the time to see if you could extend your stay and Nakamura is quick to pick up on it, “Ah right, you’ve got kids to pick up. It’ll be quick, just help set up the blocks there and you’re free to leave.” he orders.

You nodded obediently and slowly turned to the side only to catch the very familiar chocolate brown eyes of the blonde. You feel your heart hammering in your chest and your feet turn cold, it had been six years since you last saw Miya Atsumu and he was still as winsome and exhilarating as he was back then.

You may have seen him a lot on television but seeing him, right here, a few feet away from you was different. Taking in a big gulp of air, you started working on the set-up as quickly as you could yet you could still feel his burning gaze remaining on you, “Tsum-tsum, lay off her will you.” came Inunaki Shion’s loud voice snaps him out of his daze.

Great, that little twat had to make an appearance.

“Y/N-san you should really say hi,” Inunaki teased as soon as you finish your set-up.

“Oh? You’re Y/N L/N?” the orange one gushed, quickly up on his feet, you recall him as Hinata Shoyou, Youta’s favorite orange-haired ninja, “Sugawara-san’s friend?” 

You hesitantly nodded, “Oh, you know her Sho-kun?” Shion asked, seemingly amused by it all.

“What are you all crowding here for, Hinata?” Another asked, peering in them closely. This one must’ve been Bokuto, another favorite of Yuuto.

“Sugawara-san’s friend! she’s the mother of those two boys in the training camp who had to go home early!” he suddenly turns to you and then grins, “Ne, ne, the boys really seem to want to attend one of those. Why don’t you allow them to join us-”

“Forget it, Hinata.” Atsumu suddenly speaks out, that warm voice that you were accustomed to seemed cold and menacing now, “She won’t allow it.”

Shion notices the tension between you two and when he’s about to usher the energetic duo away back to the dressing room along with the other members, you let out a quiet sigh and spoke out, “I was on my way to leave, please don’t bother yourselves.” You simply replied, you didn’t waver and stared at him dead in the eye, this could be the moment to end it all and cut ties with him officially, “I apologize for what I did back then, Miya-san. I should’ve told it to you in person. I offer my sincere congratulations to you for making it this far.”

The blonde clenched his jaw, it seemed like he wanted to say something to you yet when he realizes the usual calm and collected demeanor you're putting up, he decides against it and leaves you alone by storming away first.

Hinata and the guy named Bokuto looked at you --- completely puzzled and lost like a deer in the headlights --- before following the blonde, “You truly are in a whole ‘nuther level, Y/N.” Shion whistles, “Heard you’ve got two boys now though. Congrats, where's the poor bastard?”

You continue to watch the back of Atsumu Miya. Finally, it seemed like he’d left you alone and probably for good this time, “Gone, off to a better place.” was all you replied.

Inunaki notices the longing in your voice, a completely unfamiliar emotion he had never seen back then even when you and Atsumu were together. It seemed like you and Atsumu were both the poor bastards in the end.

Miya Atsumu sleeps alone that night.

He doesn’t call his girlfriend back despite the several missed calls, he doesn’t reply to the unanswered text of his brother and his teammates. All he feels is pain tonight, pain because of your very dry apology, pain because of your bland expression. Pain because you didn’t seem to care like that time six years ago.

He shuts his eyes tight and he feels as if he’s back in college, back to that winter night where he received that dreaded phone call from you after you disappeared from him. He remembered those days clearly, your apartment had been cleaned out and paid for, you weren’t answering him on social media, your phone line was also unresponsive and he couldn’t even call your family since you never mentioned anything about them at all.

You both may have been intimate for the past two years but when you disappeared, he had the frightening realization that he didn’t know you at all.

He didn’t want to push you out of your comfort zone, he wanted you to lead the relationship but right at that moment, he wished he pried just a bit since he was worried about you.

Then in the midst of his anxiety, it came, that phone call.

“Atsumu.” your usual calm voice filled his ears and he suddenly feels the weight of the world is removed from his shoulders, thank god you were okay.

“Y/N? Baby? Where are you?”

“Out.”

“Where outside exactly?” Miya Atsumu dryly asks, “It’s cold, you shouldn’t be out now and wandering about. Would you like me to pick you up-”

“I can’t do this anymore.” you suddenly cut him off and the line goes quiet. The blonde feels the world around him quiet down too when he hears those words that he wished he heard wrong.

“What’s, what’s wrong? Y/N, are you alright?” 

“I don’t know,” You mutter, “I’m just tired.”

“Tired of what exactly?”

“Of you, of us…”

“Y/N, are you saying what I think you’re saying?” 

“Yes.” Your voice remained dead calm as if you just hadn’t broken his heart in a million pieces that moment, “Let’s stop this here now, Atsumu. Let’s break-up.”

“That’s…” He tries to keep the mood light, praying that this is one of your dark jokes, “That’s not funny, Y/N.”

“It’s not supposed to be since it’s not a joke.”

Your response was curt as usual and he doesn’t know whats worse, the fact that you’re breaking up over the phone or the fact that your tone remains stable and the same.

“Y/N, don’t do this...Baby don’t do this over the phone.” His tone seemed desperate at this point, “I’m not stopping this until you tell me what's wrong between us, you have to give me something to work with Y/N. Is it something I did?”

“I don’t know.”

“What do you mean ya don’t know?” Atsumu started to raise his tone when he notices how unaffected you seem at the other line.Frustration slowly started to bubble in him, the accent turning thicker as he got angrier, “Y/N ya can’t just disappear out of the blue and call me one day and tell me you want to break up! Do you think I’m some sort of fling? Some one-night stand or fuck buddies? We’ve been together for two years, Y/N. Two whole fucking years, What’s wrong? Do you not love me anymore?”

“Yes.”

The line went dead silent again and he hates it, he doesn’t know what to say as his face contorts in sadness and confusion. 

“I don’t…” He starts to feel a lump grow on his throat when he hears how easy it was for you to say, he knew he was in love with you more than you were with him. Many had pointed out how dangerous and how painful it would be on his side in the end, he couldn’t believe it would hurt him this much, “ I don’t fucking believe you, say it right at my face. Where the hell are ya? Let’s talk this one out in person.”

“Don’t bother, I just don’t want to see you again.”

“Y/N you can’t just-”

“I can and I will.” You cut him off, your voice was growing more and more detached and he feels like he’s back to that moment two years ago where you didn’t spare him a glance and treated him like a scrub, he hears a hefty sigh on your side and the next few words is another bullet to his heart, “I’m sorry it had to end this way, Atsumu.”

“You…” he shakily replied, trying to mask his grief with a painful chuckle. He wants to be mad at you, he wants to yell at you but for some odd reason, he couldn’t bring himself to,  “Jesus christ, you really are something, Y/N. You just broke my heart over the the fucking phone and all you could do is say sorry?”

“Sorry.” you say, like a broken-record on repeat and he hates it. He hates how he feels like this was nothing for you.

“Don’t you dare say that again when you don’t mean it-” He spat and before he could finish what he had to say, the phone line went dead. He tried to call again but it seemed like you had used a payphone. Out of complete vexation, he hurls his phone right across the room towards the blue photo frame with the both of you in it.

The sound of broken glass shards and ragged breathing is the only thing heard in the quiet apartment.

It’s not even the peak of winter that night yet he feels so numb and cold.

taglist [closed]

@fortheloveofiwaizumi​ ;  @svtbitch ; @ryaaaax ; @kiyoomile ; @lovedanii @juno-multifandom ; @gyubit17 ; @saeranoppa ; @nixxona ; @kyomihann @shorttstackk ; @itsmattsunshinehere ; @missingmystogan​ ; @Etherynaw ; @volleybloop​ ; @imcravingyou​ ;

[keelywolfe]

FIC: Pity in Short Supply (baon)

Summary:    In the aftermath of the kidnapping, Red has a few thoughts. There's a reason he's always called 'em liabilities.

Tags:  Kustard, Domestic, Established Relationship, Sans/Underfell Sans, Aftermath of a kidnapping, Undertale Monsters on the Surface, Underfell Papyrus/Underswap Papyrus, Background Spicyhoney, A Touch of Lemon Goodness

Part of the ‘by any other name’ series.

Read it on AO3

or

Read it here!

~~*~~

By the time the sun was thinking about hopping over the horizon and getting started on its daily workout, the warehouse parking lot was starting to clear out. All the ambulances were long since gone, the only one of ‘em with a person in the back was the guy who was still stuck in that weird foam shit.

Red didn’t believe in karma; he’d spent much too long eating shit himself for that, but if there was any lingering threads of justice still clinging stubbornly in the air, it’d take a long, painful time to get that fucker loose.

Most of the Embassy Security teams were heading back with all the evidence stacked in their backseats and Red was standing in a shadowed corner away from the streetlights watching them pack it in. Some of ‘em would start working on interviewing the kidnappers who didn’t need a few hours to cut them loose from a little chemical warfare, along with the agents the FBI shipped their way. Some were gonna work on getting shit together for the inevitable interviews with the kidnappees sometime this afternoon. Red had some pull and plenty of strings to yank, but even he wasn’t gonna be able to hold back the tide of questions much longer than that.

There was probably gonna be a fit pitched somewhere along the line that he’d sent his trouble twins home to sleep before getting much info, but Red would have to hula that hoop when it rolled in. Wasn’t only about Stretch, it was about his bro; there was only so much the boss could take before he slammed face-first into his breaking point and he’d been skating a little too fucking close tonight for Red’s taste. Better to let him take his pretty little liability home, clean him up, spend a li’l time rubbing his scent all over him again like a dog in heat and wasn’t it a damn good thing none of ‘em could piss.

The last thing any of ‘em needed was his bro snapping and hauling his honey away like a shorter, skinnier, bald version fucking King Kong.

(and was the memory of his brother's bleak face as he sat there waiting for answers while Red lied out promises about getting his liability back in one piece gonna haunt his nightmares, fuck yes, 'course it was, gotta balance those books somehow, there was always a price, he'd learned that lesson fast while he was still carrying his baby bro on the streets. always a price, fucking always)

Red wasn’t too worried about losing any info, anyway. Wasn’t much chance of Stretch forgetting much, not with that eidetic memory of his. Not being able to forget was half of his fucking problems to begin with.

Out in the mostly deserted parking lot, the last couple agents were finished packing up their car, not even seeming to give him a second glance as they climbed in. ‘Seeming’ was the real shit there, to anyone who wasn’t used to watching. The driver, a deceptively slender deer Monster, their antlers cut stylishly down, paused just long enough for their eyes to flick his way. The subtlest of looks, but that was it. They didn’t make a show of asking if Red wanted a ride, didn’t play any ego trips over spotting him, just hopped into the car and sped off.

Good instincts. Red made a mental note to keep an eye on that one. Good, not great, ‘cause they didn’t notice the one standing further back behind him, the guy who took up the best shadows before Red even showed up.

He stepped up now, hands stuffed into his pockets as he shuffled his way to stand next to Red, untied shoelaces dragging on the damp asphalt. They stood there together while the first unbearable rim of sunlight crested and took the shadows with it, bathing them in painful, golden light.

Red pulled out a cigar and bit off the end, spitting it to the ground. He lit a match with a flick of his thumb and held the tip in the wavering flame. When the end was smoldering, he flicked the match into the puddle, the faint hiss of it extinguishing unheard as he asked in a cloud of exhaled smoke, “how’s it going, sansy?”

Red was looking at the empty parking lot, the puddles dotting it like a scattering of miniature lakes across a land of broken asphalt, so he didn’t see Sans shrug, but he could feel it, a ripple in the still air around them. “went like clockwork. we planned for this sort of shit, you know, planned it out for years. worked out possible sceneries with fuzzybuns, toriel, all the diplomats.” Sans’s ever-present smile widened humorousness, “even had a few for edge and stretch, guess we shoulda brainstormed on those ones a little more. don’t know if we coulda come up with that one, though. drugging him was always a contingency, but no one guessed they’d strip his ass down and lose every damn tracker on him.” Another tight shrug, one quick. cramped motion, “we’ll know better next time.”

The plume of smoke rising from Red’s cigar curled in the air, drifting like a mist in the dawn light. Red watched it and nothing else, letting his sockets fall half-closed as he followed the wispy path with his eye lights. “ain’t asking about the fucking ops. how’s it going, sansy.”

There was a long moment of silence, broken only by the rough scrape of gravel shifting under Sans’s feet as he rocked on his heels. “you know, i took up with the security department for paps,” Sans said conversationally. “wanted to keep a close eye on him when he went traipsing around the big bad world to spread the good word. back underground, that whole sentry schtick was an excuse for a paycheck, i wasn’t guarding anything but my own g and a nap.”

“yeah?” Red stuck his cigar between his teeth and bit down, tasting the scatter of soggy, bitter tobacco on his tongue as the jagged tips tore through the fragile wrapper. “that so, sweetheart?”

“yeah, that’s so, dollface,” Sans chuckled mirthlessly. “little ironic, ain’t it, that it turns out i’m good at this shit. who would’ve thought.”

“yeah, never woulda guessed a judge might not be bad at the whole diggin’ up covert info,” Red shook his head sadly, “a shock, really, that ya could put that empty skull of yers to some good use.”

“sweet talker. gonna end up sleeping downstairs with the cat you keep that shit up.”

“fuck, don’t do that,” Red shuddered. “already worried if i don’t get up fast enough to feed that bitch, she’d gnaw off my pinky toe before i wake up.”

“that picky little shit wouldn’t eat you if you rolled yourself up like sushi and slathered on caviar.” Sans hesitated, then asked, softer, “how’s stretch doing?”

“like shit.” Red didn’t bother to cushion it; his pity came sparingly and Sans could take it. “he’s got his judge all cranked up to eleven. caught a helluva glimpse of me when i got here, thought he was gonna puke on my shoes.”

Sans let out a long, ragged exhale. “that’s my fault,” he said bleakly, “i got him to hit his on switch to look for that lost kid, should’ve known he’d have a hard time shutting it down again.”

“maybe.” Red wasn’t too concerned about it. If Stretch wanted to retire and shove all that down into the dark, wasn’t any dust off his ass, but the only way he’d lose it entirely would be if someone ripped it out of him by way of a dustpan. “if those fuckers hadn’t tried to pull a limburger baby on the kid, then it woulda died back down on its own.”

This time Sans chuckle was more real, a little honest humor creeping in. “don’t let stretch hear you call him kid, he’s already got his panties twisted halfway up his spine.”

Red scoffed, tapping away the ash gathering at the tip of his cigar. “honey bun might be the same age as us, but he ain’t as old as we are. don’t matter how the universe tried to age him up.”

The sound Sans made might’ve been a hum of agreement or the juicy, hawking prelude to spitting. The sun hadn’t had a chance to chase away the evening chill and Sans’s jacket was zipped up against it. Over the tab of his zipper, nearly concealed by neckline of his hood, Red could see the glossy rim of well-oiled dark leather, the slightest glint of metal. He let himself look at it for a long moment, take a sip of dark satisfaction at seeing his collar right where it was supposed to be. Then he looked away, back across the empty, crumbling parking lot.

Sans didn’t try to touch him, only shifted his stance until their fingers brushed in a way that could pretend to be accidental, bone lightly scraping bone.

“we should get going,” Red said. The sun was climbing higher, the stars giving way to gauzy, useless clouds. At least stars were interesting, a reminder there was another Aboveground than this one, another path upward that might someday be reached. “we got a lot of shit to do downtown.”

“we do,” Sans agreed. He tipped his head in Red’s direction, slanting him a glance out of the corner of his socket. His eye lights were tinted golden by the sunrise, sly and knowing in a way that had nothing to do with magic. “want me to blow you in the stairwell before we take off?”

Red didn’t wait for him to finish, tossing his half-burned cigar into a puddle, dousing it and sending a splash of ripples through the still water. “fuck, yes.”

He followed Sans into the warehouse and in moments he was braced against the rusty handrail with his shorts around his ankles in the dust, shuddering at the feel of that hot, wet mouth around him, worshiping his cock with lovingly sinful familiarity. Every inch of his focus was taken up by that and there wasn’t room to think about a single other thing. Not even the phantom sensation of metaphorically getting flayed alive by a wild orange gaze, the unexpected, needle-sharp feel of every one of his sins digging in their spidery claws as they crawled up his spine.

He didn’t think about it at all.

-fin

[bruisedribs]

AU Masterpost

you can literally always talk to me about my aus. yes I have an au problem. it's incurable.

New (this blog only):

#dnau - collab w fred

remus gets into dna tests, janus' dna keeps changing, janus has an identity crisis

#mafiau - collab w fred

fake marriage turn into taking over a mafia, dukexiety, rosleepceit, freed androids becoming family

#dragonau - collab w fred

janus is a dragon that hoards boyfriends

#marvelau

janus get spider powers, janus is very hot, spideypool, dukexiety, future sleepceit, one-sided roceit

#eldritchau

remy is sleep, janus is a trickster, roman remus and virgil are a trio, soulmates exist, eldritch beings like to meddle, dukexiety, dukesleepceit, rosleepceit

#idolau

remy is an idol forced to be the face of scandals, janus is a barista with a dark past, virgil is a bartender trying to save money, roman is struggling to get a role, remus probably has a job and a home, oh and most of them live in the same shitty building

Old (from loveceit):

#bread au

rosleepceitmas, anaintruality, cottagecore dream, urban fantasy

#vampiceit - collab w fred

anxceitmusleep, canon setting, janus is a vampire disguised as a snake

#belief!dee

deceit used to be belief, king is the only one who knows, qpp kingceit, roceit, remus has abandonment trauma, remus is obsessed w roman (fic)

#powerswap au

canon setting, the dragon witch curses the wrong twin, remus janus and virgil all switch powers, slowburn anxceitmus

#pride!roman au

unsympathetic remus, remus replaces roman, deceit finds out, roman becomes pride since he's not needed as creativity

#the horror au

urban fantasy, antemori shores, the abandoned circus isn't abandoned, watch out for the Ringmaster

#ts witch au

urban fantasy, antemori shores, thomas inherited an apartment building, seven witches are the only ones living there, intruality, other ships tbd

#local cryptids au

schrodingers sleepxiety -> creepxiety, lomile, roceit, tobus, logan raised the twins, remy and virgil raised dee, virgil's youtube audience has lots of questions, remy owns fluidi-tea the coffee shop

#haunted motel au

virgil is the only employee at the enigma motel, the motel is haunted by five ghosts, virgil wants to contact the ghosts

#ts magic au

ironshell, deceit has too many people attracted to him, deceit is the only human, fae shouldn't be trusted but also the twins are fae

#fairytale au

a king broke the terms set by the fae after the queen passed away, a princess becomes a mage in a tower, the tower becomes cramped, established lomas, somewhat slowburn dukesleepxiety dukesleepceit and rosleepceit

#illfitting powers

virgil has fire powers, patton can communicate with spiders, logan conjures realistic illusions, roman can turn invisible, remus travels through other's reflections, janus is forced to fit in through painful shapeshifting, remy keeps people awake, emile influence people to feel the same emotion he does

#snakely escape au

deceit strips away everything but his core - self-preservation- and hides out in the imagination as an inland taipan called mair, qpp dukesleep, slowburn anxceitmus and roceit

#unexpected roommates au

semi-canon setting, roman is a ghost that haunts thomas, deceit is a sizs-changing fae that got stuck in thomas' home, they can see the sides when they're out, the sides know about them before thomas does

#fakimals

remus is thought to be the only dark side because virgil and janus are always in animal form, the animals will still pop up if they disagree with something, ignoring the animals doesn't end well, qpp anxceit, slow roceit

#sideswap au

canon setting, belief, creativity and caution as light sides, guilt, pride and detachment as dark sides, blind!belief, light sides chirp, probably onseided roceit (pride loves belief)

#garbage au

remus is a homeless demon sleeping in the dumpster behind the tattoo shop virgil works at, remus gets to stay in the shop's break room, roman is an angel, dalitso and remy own the tattoo shop and they corrupt/seduce roman, virgil gets to tattoo remus, dukexiety, eventual rosleepceit that starts with roman playing matchmaker to remy and dee

#the coincidence au

romulus, roman and remus don't know that they're all cousins, they have different surnames and have lived in different parts of the world before ending up in the same town, all three gets interested in dee who looks cool but is a gay disaster, creativiceit, sleepxiety

#soft vibes au

past sleepceit lead to remus being born, eve adopts roman and virgil, thomceit, eve's adoptive parents are emile and patton, soft family focused au

#ts sunflower au

thomas went to an adoption centre w a friend as moral support, met dee, continued to visit dee, adopted dee, now has an autistic 8 year old to care for, sir hiss the stuffed corn snake, mr picani is dee's counsellor, dee transfer to a new school, dee is now in fourth grade w the twins and virgil, remy is dee's friend from his old school and turns out to be mr picani's kid, could be thomile

#toddler dee au

thomas gives deceit less energy after the reveal, deceit changes to a smaller shape to conserve energy but fucks up, deceit is now a toddler w no memories, deceit only trusts virgil in the beginning, toddlers can't control their powers, roman is dee's role model and future husband (in the way kids want to marry adults), deceit actually ages at an accelerated rate (1 year in 4 months)

#kingceit human au

king roman and remus are triplets, deceit and remy are twins, deceit killed their and remy's parent in self defense, king is deceit's hot hairdresser that they accidentally confess murder to, deceit and remy take in 12 yr old virgil from the street, kingceit, rosleep, dukesleep

Old and temporarily abandoned:

#art heist au

#ts avatar au

#ts tangled au

#yet another youtube au

#soulmate wings au

#the high school au

#ts mythology au

#dead spouses au

#wtnv au

Dead aus:

#twin omens au

#parent teacher au

#deceit too au

#hogwarts au

#crazy ex au

#ts universe au

fred, friend and au enabler: @anxiouslyfred

[kdramachitchat]

Yu-Mi's Cells Episode 6 Recap: Beach Date at Sokcho

The Bathroom Emergency of Doom

The Cells started off thinking it will be the last time Woong and Yu-Mi would spend their final time together again. We ended with Woong the last episode saying that it was all a misunderstanding and Yu-Mi invited him to eat the cake he bought at her place. Woong's Cell Village is celebrating. They were about to enter their apartment, the Cells are thinking about Woong's first move. From all the nerves building up, Woong ended up having a stomach ache. Intestine Cell was introduced, happiness always comes with hardships and it doesn't come for free! I assupose. Woong looks out of focus while Yu-Mi is there about to enjoy the cake. Yu-Mi tells him to switch of the lights before she blows off her birthday candles. Woong is struggling to stand up and the Cells are deciding on different situations to handle his stomach. Hope he doesn't embarrass himself. Woong is struggling too much go through pain, yet excuses himself since he's in a dire situation to head towards the bathroom. The Cells thinking they're doomed because he did number 02 during his first visit and they only hope Yu-Mi would understand. Before even Woong leaves the bathroom, the toilet clogged. Dear me.

This is so embarrassing. Yu-Mi notices that he's taken forever and thinks that he was probably in the shower. Calm down. Woong asks her if she has that certain item in her home, if not he has to go out to buy. Yu-Mi is probably thinking of something else. Woong tells her it's a plunger he needs and good thing she has one. This situation is so embarrassing after Yu-Mi offered to help but he declined. Woong cleaned it up himself but looks like it got worst.

This situation is driving Woong crazy and i just couldn't help but crack up at the hilariousness of this catastrophic event. Woong excuses himself to leave and Yu-Mi offered tea to ease his stomach. Yu-Mi resisted and she continues to take care of Woong who has a tummy ache. She even rubbed his tummy! Woong notices her tons of books saying it's a unexpected hobby, Yu-Mi tells him that she wants to write didn't think it suits her. Yu-Mi asks him if he wanted to be a game developer all his life. Woong notices a photo of her family portraits, she talked about her family & how her grandma takes care of her when she's sick. The next morning they head out to eat for breakfast, Woomi invites her for a trip out to the beach. The cells thanks Intestine Cells too.

The Beach Date

Both Woong and Yu-Mi are enjoying their beach date together, they ate buckwheat noodles too. Woong couldnt book a room for them due to a investor meeting and sends Yu-Mi the details to have it booked. She was able to call in but the agent tells her they only have twin-beds with the ocean view. She requested a double bed room but it doesnt have the view, instead it's a parking lot view. The ocean twin bed room view has a glass door bathroom which ended up with Yu-Mi imagining things again. Hahaha. Nosebleed. The Cells are fine with it and they can enjoy other views instead, if you know what I mean.

Etiquette Cell is introduced. She ended not deciding at the moment when she first called and called back with the bed not available anymore. Yu-Mi started screaming at the agent which made the coworkers shocked. She ended up getting the double bedroom and the Cells are happy. They started out with Woong talking about their room in the car, Yu-Mi hasn't told him yet about her mishap booking. He kept talking about the room that has a weird glass bathroom & complained about a person will be called a pervert if they booked that room. Yu-Mi called the reservations in panic and wanting to change the room. There isn't any room available and Yu-Mi wants to cancel her booking with the Cells protesting for her not to.

Yu-Mi decided not to push through her cancellation. They finally entered the room, Woong is excited to see the view but is shocked by the glass bathroom. The bathroom is a problem but Yu-Mi tells him that they got a good view instead. Woong ended up complaining at the front desk and Yu-Mi is in panic. He complained them about the issue and the front desk insisted that they informed whoever booked the room.

He's so upset that he's at the hotel's reservation office and requested for the reservation audio. When Woong's angry he takes it to the end. Woong is so stubborn and the Cells are struggling too. I am also struggling to see Woong listening to the reservation audio. This is so embarassing for her. She ended up stopping the audio on time but with her in a hurry the keyboard was pressed again, the audio continued to play. The Cells are in catastrophy saying that they're doomed.

Yu-Mi is embarrassed and tells him that she requested it. Yu-Mi tells him that there's no room left. He's left in shock and flustered. While they ate, Yu-Mi is upset and defended herself because she just followed what Woong tells her.

Woong just ended up laughing because at the situation and not to her but Yu-Mi is truly effected by the embarrassing situation, the cells said that they should just understand her. King Sullen Cell is also introduced.

Woong tries to understand Yu-Mi's feelings and decided that they should just go home. Yu-Mi doesn't want to leave and tries to immerse herself with the beach front view one last time. They were about to leave and Woong can tell that she's upset. He told her that she didn't cancel the room. He didn't cancel it because he wanted to ask her first and doesnt want to waste the moment.

Yu-Mi tells him that it's up to him because it's his money. Woong tells her that he doesn't want to cancel it and likes the glass bathroom. King Sullen and Etiquette Cell is being tied up and kicked out. After the struggle came down, the intensity went up. Both Yu-Mi and Woong ended up making out in the room. Eeep.

[oasisspringstownie]

FAME: A Legacy Challenge

Sul sul simmers!

Like many of you, one of my favorite things to do in The Sims is play Legacy Challenges. They lead you to explore new aspects of gameplay, give you new imaginative ideas, and facilitate storytelling. So, a couple of nights ago I got the idea to create a new kind of legacy challenge revolving around different aspects of fame.

The goal isn’t exactly to become the most famous using said career/ skill, but to play around with different elements of the fame system in the game. You by no means need all the packs to play through this legacy. While the experience would be more complete and you will be missing careers and skills and stuff you can obviously adapt it to your need. Also, you are more than welcomed to use mods to enrich your gameplay. I myself can’t play without mods and look forward to see what kind of chaos mods can add to this challenge.

So without further a do below are the 10 generations I concocted like a fever dream at 2 am on a Saturday evening:

Gen 1: A Shaky Foundation

Traits: Cheerful, Ambitious, Self-Absorbed

Career: Acting, Style Influencer (Trendsetter Branch)

You move to a new city full of hopes and dreams. You initially pursue your dream of becoming an actor. However, your career is cut short by the unexpected arrival of your first child. You retreat from the spotlight in order to raise your baby and put all of your energy into making sure they have the best future possible. The rest of the time you spend either working or trying to unwind from your demanding life. What will fate bring you and your descendants?

Goals:

Move into an empty lot with 1600 simoleons for the bare minimum.

Start in the Acting Career, but abandon it for the Style Influencer career once your first child is born. Remain in the Style Influencer Career and eventually choose the Trendsetter Branch.

Max out the Style Influencer Career.

Reach level 10 of the Parenting and Wellness Skills.

Be close friends with all of your children and make sure they each age up with at least 2 positive character attributes.

Gen 2: Get Your Head in the Game

Traits: Active, Music Lover, Outgoing

Career: Athlete, Entertainment (Musician Branch)

Your parent might have seemed very overbearing at the time, but they instilled a work ethic in you like no other. Your entire life you were split between your two passions: basketball and singing. Okay, fine, you're Troy Bolton. After succeeding in the sports world you still find yourself feeling somewhat unfulfilled. You enter the entertainment career later on in life to live out your dreams. Will this be the start of something new?

Goals:

Max out the Athlete Career and then switch to the Entertainment Career (Musician Branch).

Max out the Fitness and Singing Skills.

Be in the drama club in high school.

Gen 3: Going for the Stars

Traits: Clumsy, Loner, Genius

Career: Astronaut

Your parent always told you to shoot for the stars, you just took it a bit too seriously. This world was always a bit too pedestrian for you and you yearn to finally lay your eyes on the astronomical craters of Sixam. There's just one problem: you're terrible at it. It's not your fault, you're just a bit clumsy; but will your two left feet keep you from reaching your dreams?

Goals:

Work in the Astronaut Career your entire life. Get demoted and fired at least once in your lifetime.

Destroy and repair a rocket 3 times.

Live in a tiny home for your young adulthood and adulthood.

Have at least one set of twins. *You can cheat for this!*

Gen 4: The Finer Things in Life

Traits: Materialistic, Hates Children, Lazy

Career: None

You've seen all the generations before you work their little pixelated butts off for every simoleon, but you're not about that life. You were destined for the finer things in life.

Goals

Reach level 10 of the Charisma and Mixology Skills.

Marry and survive 5 spouses. Take that wording however you want. Divorce is not allowed. You must be the last once standing. After all, spouses are like infinity stones. Meaningless.

Never have a job. Only make money from spouses, family, or children. If you get desperate enough you can ask a friend for a loan or steal, but no working of any kind.

Each child you decide to have with one of your rich spouses comes with a 20k trust fund. If they get taken away or die before coming of age, all the money has to be returned to the evil capitalist overlords. You can't get rid of them that easily.

Own at least 1 restaurant/ retail/ business with one of your spouses. Decorate it, assign the uniform, and hire everyone, but you never run it. Why would you go through the trouble?

Gen 5: My Precious

Traits: Art Lover, Kleptomaniac, Self-Assured

Career: Criminal

Your childhood was pretty hectic and you felt like you barely knew your parents. Who needs them? You've never needed anyone else anyway. On your 18th birthday, you receive your inheritance and use it to buy yourself an unfurnished apartment in the nicest building you can find and that's when your money runs out... literally. However, will a new job as a tough guy be the first of many great ideas or will it only be the beginning of the end for this famed family?

Goals

Once you become a young adult give yourself enough money to buy one of the apartments in the Uptown Neighborhood in San Myshuno. It must be unfurnished. After moving in set your money to 0 simoleons.

Complete the Criminal Career.

Reach level 10 of the Mischief and Dancing Skills.

Gain an atrocious reputation and spend the rest of your life trying to cover it up.

Steal 10 paintings from a museum and exhibit them proudly in your home. You are never allowed to sell them. As an adult, hide them in a secret attic nobody else has access to or knows about. They are your precious.

Gen 6: The Muses

Traits: Creative, Family Oriented, Insider

Career: Painter

You could have anything you wanted in the world thanks to your family's empire so you pursued your passion: painting. While you were never close to your other family members you were always very close to your art teacher. This led you to have very close ties to your friends, co-workers, and eventual children. Will your legacy remain for longer in the memory of strangers or your loved ones?

Goals

Complete the Painter Career

Reach level 10 of the Painting, Cooking and Baking Skills

Have a better relationship with your art teacher than anyone else in your family until you're a teen.

Move to a new world once you become a young adult and cut ties with your family.

Be the leader of one club for all your young adulthood and adulthood.

Be close friends with 3 co-workers and all of your children.

Prepare a meal at least once a week with the help of your children. *I know we don't have this in the game yet technically, but I'm hoping to have Cottage Living by the time I play with this generation*

Hang 5 paintings in a museum.

Retire from Painting Career to help care for your grandchildren.

Gen 7: Mole

Traits: Good, Perfectionist, Paranoid

Career: None

You always had a good relationship with your parents. You told each other everything... well, almost everything. You never understood why but one of your parents never talked about the rest of your family members. They explained that they simply never had a good relationship and would rather not talk about it. You respect this until their death when you return to their seemingly abandoned childhood home. While exploring the house you find a not-so-subtle bookcase door and a long forgotten attic filled with paintings. You take them in hopes of returning them but unbeknownst to you, you are being watched.

After an unfortunately unavailable nail-biting car chase, you shake off your attackers. You can't just lead them home to the rest of your family and what would the police do? They don't even arrest Vlad when he's trying to bite all of your sims!

Sorry, different rant.

So you do the only logical thing: you sell the paintings you just stole for some cash to buy an empty lot and skip town. A new life awaits you... just a bit underground.

Goals

Reach level 10 of the Writing, Logic, and Handiness Skills.

Complete the Best Selling Author Aspiration.

After your parent dies, you visit Gen 5's main home and retrieve the paintings hidden in the attic generations ago. Sell them and use the money to buy an empty lot in a completely different world.

Use your remaining money to build a small underground bunker. You can now never leave your bunker or risk immediate death.

You make your income by writing books under your new name. Oh, didn't I mention that? You changed your name to avoid detection. Your children may carry this new fake last name or your partner's.

Gen 8: Part of Your World

Traits: Loves Outdoors, Outgoing, Geek

Career: Social Media

All you knew was the bunker and it's not that you hated it, you just wanted a bit more. You're basically the little mermaid, except you don't get to be a mermaid. You just get a bunker you can never leave and a desperate yearning to explore the outside world.

Your outlet is the internet. From a young age you loved using it to play video games and make friends. As a teen you began to make videos and fostered a community online. Will you finally take your place in the world or remain hidden underground?

Goals

Reach level 10 of the Media Production and Video Gaming Skills

Complete the Social Media Career.

You're never allowed to leave the underground bunker until you're a teen.

You aren't allowed to go to school. Instead you play video games and use your computer for outside interaction.

As a teen you start developing your online presence by posting on social media and making videos on the video station.

You are only allowed to move out of the household once your parent dies and you have enough money in reserves to buy a furnished home.

Gen 9: Natural Born Performer

Traits: Gloomy, Unflirty, Adventurous

Career: Entertainment (Comedy Branch)

Due to your parent's fame, it was always expected you would follow in their footsteps. While a bit more gloomy than most, you are happiest when you make others laugh. So you join the Entertainer Career where you flourish as a comedian. You're also a bit unlucky in love. Will the family name's fame and your own notoriety keep you from finding true love or are you destined to a lifetime of gold diggers and one night stands?

Goals

Complete the Entertainer Career (Comedy Branch).

Reach level 10 of the Comedy and Rock Climbing skills.

Complete Serial Romantic Aspiration

Have four children.

Die suddenly and *mysteriously* in your adulthood.

Gen 10: A Grand Finale

Traits: Kleptomaniac, Ambitious, Perfectionist

Career: Actor

After losing your parents at a very young age, you and your siblings were sent to live with some distant relatives you didn't even know about. While you and your siblings are all very different and you bicker plenty, you always stick together.

After learning you are a descendant of some of the most famous and infamous sims in history, you are determined to meet and surpass their achievements. Will you come out on top or have you flown too close to the sun?

Goals

Complete the Actor Career

Achieve level 10 of 10 skills of your choosing.

Become a Global Superstar.

Get a star on Starlight Boulevard.

Throughout your lifetime you must go on vacation to every house you lived in throughout all previous 9 generations. Oh, and your three other siblings need to come along too. Think of it as Narnia meets It. Also make sure to steal something from each of the houses as a souvenir and display it proudly in your own home.

After you've completed all the things above, get turned into a vampire and choose to end your mortal legacy here... or start a whole new type all together.

Thank you so much for indulging me in this insanity. While I haven't played through any of these generations myself as of yet, I look forward to see the chaos and cuteness possible in The Sims.

Happy simming!

V

[bewitching-elizabeth-olsen]

Press/Gallery: Elizabeth Olsen Is Ready to Lead the MCU

An ambitious new Disney+ series might just give the strongest Avenger the happy ending she deserves.

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  ELLE: We can’t keep meeting Elizabeth Olsen like this. By “this,” I mean in the throes of catastrophe or bereavement, or, to put it plainly, when she’s an emotional wreck. In the 2018 Facebook Watch drama Sorry For Your Loss, Olsen assumes the role of Leigh Shaw, a young widow grappling with the unexpected loss of her husband and all the painful nuisances that come with death: the unbearable waves of sadness, the clichéd condolences, a grief support group that runs out of donuts. At one point, Leigh says through a cracked voice, “I’m just mad all the time.” It’s hard not to draw parallels to Olsen’s other angry character. After all, “mad” is exactly how 2015’s Avengers: Age of Ultron introduced us to Wanda Maximoff.

Defined by tragedy since her Marvel debut, Wanda (aka the Scarlet Witch) is an orphan with telekinetic powers. When not saving the world, she spends most of her time onscreen grieving the deaths of her parents, twin brother, or lover. Wanda’s never been allowed to fully exist outside the confines of her grief and anger, but with the launch of WandaVision—Marvel’s foray into serialized content for streaming—she may just be getting the happy ending she deserves.

Partly inspired by The Vision comic book, which follows synthezoid superhero Vision and his family as they move to the suburbs of Washington, D.C., the Disney+ series is an ode to the TV sitcoms we’ve come to love, with Wanda and Vision (Paul Bettany) basking in newlywed bliss—except Vision’s been very dead (killed twice, in fact) since the events of 2018’s Avengers: Infinity War. It’s unclear exactly how these starcrossed characters got to suburbia, but for now, it’s a delight to see the typically solemn duo sink their teeth into slapstick comedy.

“The show is like a blank slate for them,” Olsen tells me over Zoom, her light brown fringe a departure from Wanda’s red waves. The Scarlet Witch’s doleful glare is also long gone; in its place, Olsen’s eyes are wide with excitement. “Wanda and Vision’s journey to this point is a story of pure, innocent love and deep connection with another person,” she explains. “It was also very traumatizing. Tragedy has always been their story. In our show, we kind of wipe that clean and start fresh.”

But Wanda’s complicated past looms over WandaVision. Age of Ultron saw her and her twin brother, Pietro, initially opposing the Avengers (the siblings volunteered for a series of experiments with Hydra—a super evil organization within the MCU—after the deaths of their parents at the hands of Tony Stark’s Stark Industries) before switching sides to help save the Earth. The movie ends in victory for our superheroes, but yet another tragedy for Wanda when Pietro dies in battle. She finds comfort in the arms of Vision, an android created from the remains of Tony’s J.A.R.V.I.S. program, but even that bliss is short-lived. You see, Vision can only live with the help of the Mind Stone, which Mad Titan Thanos needs to take over the universe. In Infinity War, Vision asks Wanda to sacrifice him, and Wanda reluctantly agrees—but Thanos reverses time to gain control of the stone, killing the robot for a second time. Wanda’s pain is palpable: Imagine sacrificing the love of your life to save everyone else, just to watch him brought back to life and killed again—by the very villain you’re trying to defeat.

Though the thrill of playing a character with superhuman abilities is enticing for any actress, Olsen says it was Wanda’s internal battle with mental health that attracted her to the role in the first place. “[Joss Whedon] explained to me that Wanda Maximoff has always been this pillar of the struggle of mental health, from her pain and depression and traumatic experiences to how she completely alters the reality of the comics,” Olsen says of her early conversations with the Age of Ultron director. “The thing I held onto after reading the initial script was that she was not only powerful because of her abilities, but because of her emotions.”

In fact, MCU theorists would argue she’s one of, if not the, strongest Avenger. She can infiltrate the others’ minds to reveal their biggest fears (Age of Ultron). She can overpower Vision and send him plunging through several floors to break up a fight between warring superheroes (Avengers: Civil War). She can even bring Thanos to his knees, snapping his sword in half and forcibly removing his armor piece by piece (Infinity War).

Still, “they keep slapping her over the head with more grief,” Olsen quips.

As phase one of the Marvel Cinematic Universe began with the sound of clanging metal on May 2, 2008, phase four kicked off on January 15, 2021 with a kitschy 1950s sitcom theme: “She’s a magical gal in a small town locale / he’s a hubby who’s part machine / How will this duo fit in and pull through? Oh, by sharing a love / like you’ve never seen.”

With WandaVision, Marvel steers clear of the typical superhero trappings: no destructive battles at a Berlin airport or across the streets of New York City; no blonde-haired god time-traveling to other realms; no tree-like alien fight alongside a raccoon. Wandavision takes place after the events of Endgame in a fictional suburban town called Westview, and the biggest problem the newlyweds face in the show’s opening moments is creating a convincing backstory to get nosy neighbor Agnes (Kathryn Hahn) off their backs.

“They are just trying to fit in,” Olsen explains. “They’re trying to not be found out by their neighbors that they’re super-powered beings.” Now, if only we can figure out what the hell is actually going on. Olsen remains tight-lipped: “The reason it’s a sitcom shows itself later in the show,” she hints. “When Kevin [Feige] told me, it didn’t feel so bizarre. It felt like a great way to start our story.”

“With our show, you don’t know what the villain is, or if there is one at all.”

So, is Wanda stuck in the first stage of grief, denial? Has she altered reality as a coping mechanism for Vision’s death? Is she being held hostage by a terrorist organization (ahem, Hydra!)? One thing we do know is that someone is watching the couple and taking notes. At the end of episode 1, the camera pans out from a retro TV playing an episode of WandaVision (meta!) to show a hand jotting down notes. There’s a strange sword symbol on the notebook and a nearby control board, and in episode 2, the same sign appears on a toy helicopter lodged in the couple’s front yard. Later, when a mysterious beekeeper crawls out of the sewer on the couple’s street, the symbol is seen on the back of his suit. In its 20-plus movies, Marvel villains have always existed in plain sight. But with a new, less obvious darkness lurking at every turn, Wanda may have to return to her world-saving roots.

“Someone said to me when you watch any of these hero movies, you know when the villain’s about to show themselves, and you also have an idea of who the villain is,” Olsen says. “With our show, you don’t know what the villain is, or if there is one at all.” For now, WandaVision allows for glimmers of hope and optimism for Wanda and Vision, despite what darkness tries to threaten their happiness. “Wanda is trying to protect everything in her bubble, protect what she and Vision have and this experience,” Olsen says. “I think everything she does is in response to keeping things together.”

In addition to exploding the concept of the superhero onscreen, WandaVision toys with a different era of TV in each episode. The pilot takes viewers to the ‘50s with an episode filmed in front of a live studio audience, and Wanda dresses up in the quintessential housewife garb, not a hair out of place in her voluminous bob. By the time we click on episode 2, she trades in her apron and kitten heels for a more pared-down ‘60s look, while episode 3 gives a nod to the ‘70s, complete with a Brady Bunch-style staircase and a shag haircut for Vision.

While dressing up was the fun part, time-hopping through the eras required a lot of binge-watching old sitcoms to get the mannerisms down right. Olsen studied series like The Dick Van Dyke Show, The Brady Bunch, The Mary Tyler Moore Show, and Bewitched to “understand the tones of each era” and get a grasp of how Wanda and Vision should act as a couple. (One of her favorite TV pairings was Jane Kaczmarek and Bryan Cranston from Malcolm in the Middle.) She was fascinated by the way female characters evolved through the decades: “You have to learn appropriate manners—what’s considered being polite or proper. That coincides with women’s voices changing,” she explains. “I enjoyed challenging myself to match the syntax and the lyricism. I live in a very chest-register kind of deep voice. I had to remember not to bring it up at certain moments.”

For so long, Wanda served as a supporting character to Marvel’s biggest names, and the formulaic mundanity of the major theatrical releases made it easy to get comfortable. WandaVision offered Olsen a much-needed challenge. “I’ve only been working for 10 years, but there is this feeling where you start to get comfortable,” she says. “WandaVision was the furthest thing from comfortable for me. It felt intimidating. The character is a completely different thing.”

And fans hoping for a little Marvel action won’t be disappointed. “We still live up to what Marvel does,” she promises. “We just tell the story in a completely different way. It’s a very emotional, female story and it’s a story they haven’t told yet for either of our characters.” Whatever your theory is, keep the cliché condolences to yourself. No one will be uttering, “Sorry for your loss” in Wanda’s world.

Press/Gallery: Elizabeth Olsen Is Ready to Lead the MCU was originally published on Elizabeth Olsen Source • Your source for everything Elizabeth Olsen