#uhhhh yeah so here u go. if this flops it never happened i guess

[hrina]

The Thrill of the Chase, Pt. I

PAIRING: Harry x Reader RATING: M WORD COUNT: 3.6k REQUESTED: no

hi! it’s been a while since i’ve posted something on here lol, i wonder if anyone still remembers me 🤕

this is PART 1 of the hunter!AU that i’ve been writing. while the story is a patreon-exclusive, my patrons gave me permission to post the first chapter here on tumblr for anyone who’s curious about the kind of content i offer on patreon. 

if you want to read the rest of this series and unlock access to my other exclusive work, you can sign up for my patreon here. and as always, please reblog the fics you like and leave feedback for the authors, because we pour a lot of time and effort into our stories. happy reading 💌

~*~

Harry’s life is simple.

He performs only the essentials—wakes up and eats an apple for breakfast. Drizzles some lemon juice into his flask of water to keep his teeth healthy and clean. Shrugs on a few heavy furs. Lets Magnus outside to keep him from howling and pawing at the door. Sharpens his arrows. Knocks on the threshold of the cabin once for good luck. Goes hunting.

Upon returning, he crouches next to the firepit, laying out his kills and skinning them. He cooks one for himself—something small, like a squirrel, or a rabbit. Others, he saves for the market—fox, deer, coyote, boar. The pelts, tusks, and antlers are extremely sought-after (particularly by nobles), and often earn enough coin to carry him through the rest of the week.

He doesn’t entertain visitors, because who in their right mind would trek up the side of a mountain just to seek out one lonely hunter? Despite that, he’s come to appreciate his solitude. The silence is familiar—comfortable. Besides, Magnus proves both excellent and useful company, if the sheer volume of their kills offers any indication.

A simple life for a simple man.

Harry doesn’t need anyone else.

“Ready to go, mutt?”

He scratches behind Magnus’ droopy ears. One of the hound’s hindlegs thumps frantically in response. Harry chuckles, slinging his bow over his right shoulder and pulling open the cabin door.

“Come on, then.”

The sky is a dark, cloudy grey, and the smell of oncoming rain is unmistakable. Still, the two of them persevere, ducking past the trees at the edge of the clearing.

It’s a bad day to hunt.

With the threat of a storm looming just above the canopy, the animals have forgone their typical foraging patterns in favour of taking shelter. Harry only manages to kill a rabbit, and even then, it’s a messy shot. He usually gets them right through the eye—a quick, neat splice that results in minimal suffering. This time, however, his foot slips on a damp stone; he fumbles, and the arrow buries itself into the creature’s stomach.

“Fuck.”

The rabbit is still alive when he reaches it, its furry body heaving with shaky, uneven breaths. Harry kneels down, apologising quietly. His hand finds the scabbard strapped to his waist, and he draws a silver dagger from its depths.

He slits the poor hare’s throat just as rain begins to fall.

It’s easy work, after that. He pins the animal’s fluffy forelimbs together, tying them in place with thick, coarse rope. Magnus whimpers as Harry slides the creature’s limp body over his shoulder. He shoots the hound a tired look and shakes his head. Damp brown curls stick to his temples.

“Think that’s enough for today.”

The two of them have nearly made it back home—Harry’s boots squelch as he jumps over the small creek that flows close to the clearing—when Magnus perks up, lifting his snout and sniffing the air.

“What is it, mutt?” Harry asks.

Magnus releases a loud bark and takes off in the direction of the cabin. Harry sprints after him, one hand clutching his game while the other wraps around the leather grip of his bow.

“Magnus!” he yells.

The dog skids to a stop next to the wide trunk of a tree. He barks again and wags his tail feverishly.

Harry releases his bow, approaching with slow, cautious steps.

“What’s got you so—shit.”

You’re slumped in the mud, unconscious. Harry’s gaze rakes over your form, from your tattered blue gown to the leaves and twigs tangled in your hair. There are a few cuts littered across your face, arms, and chest. Rivulets of blood trickle down your wrist, spiderwebbing across your skin.

Magnus sticks his tongue out and pants.

“Good boy,” Harry mutters, bestowing a rugged caress atop the hound’s head.

He gathers you into his arms, paying no mind to the extra weight of your sodden dress. Your neck lolls over his bicep, sternum rising and falling with shallow, barely-there breaths. Harry carries you out of the forest and into the clearing. When he kicks open the cabin door, your eyelids flutter.

“Bear?” you mumble, lifting your head slightly. Your voice is grating, hoarse.

He looks at you. Your face contorts for only a moment before you slouch back into oblivion.

He sets you down onto the thick, woven rug splayed out in front of the hearth. He works quickly, shrugging off his furs and his game and discarding all of it without a second thought. Rain thrums against the roof, but the sound is lost amidst his heavy footsteps.

He hurries into his bedroom and pulls open the top drawer of his wooden dresser, fumbling for a glass jar and a spool of bandages. When his fingers finally make contact with the desired supplies, he darts back into the other room and kneels beside your motionless body.

He draws his dagger again, gripping the intricate material of your gown and slicing through it. Your corset proves far more challenging, practically embedded into your skin. He sets his knife aside, not willing to risk it. Instead, he hooks his fingers beneath the top of the girdle, rough knuckles brushing against your soft bosom. With a mighty tug, the structured fabric splits under his palms.

He screws open the lid on the jar and dips his thumb inside. The salve is sticky, viscous, and smells faintly of lavender. He smears it across your scrapes before inspecting your wrist.

The flesh is slashed and bloodied—how did you acquire such an injury? Canines? Claws? Harry uses the frayed edges of your dress to clean the mess. He then unwinds a few bindings from their roll, expertly bandaging your wound.

Once he’s finished, he sits back on his haunches, expelling a stale breath. His work is far from over—he needs to wash you, to scrub off all the dirt and grime staining your skin. He’ll go down to the creek with a cloth, he thinks, and saturate it with cool water. He’ll pick the leaves and branches out of your hair, and cover you in spare furs to keep you warm. He’ll prepare a hot meal so that you may eat when you wake. You’ll be ravenous, certainly.

These thoughts whirl around in his head, along with the realisation that you might expire here, lying on an old rug in the middle of a stranger’s secluded home. Still, he watches your chest rise, swelling with proof of your vitality. The sight puts him at ease.

Harry aims a cursory glance over his shoulder. Magnus is stationed at the door, wet snout resting on the ground. The dog gazes at your limp body with big, solemn eyes, as though he somehow understands the severity of the situation.

“Don’t worry, mutt,” Harry tells him, knees shuffling against the floor. “I won’t let her die.”

~*~

Three days pass.

Harry curtails the duration of his hunts. He kills only the essentials: a hare or a squirrel, something small enough to cook over the fire. He has enough coin saved up from his previous trades to last him another few trips to the market.

Every morning, he prepares a simple, homely meal for you should you wake. When you do not, he eats the food in your place—he’ll be damned if it goes to waste.  

On the fourth day, he carries a bowl of soup into his room. He’s expecting to see you tucked into his bed, still unconscious. Instead, you’re alert, sitting upright and studying your surroundings. The furs that previously covered your body now pool around your waist, exposing your naked chest. When you catch sight of Harry lingering in the doorway, you gasp, fumbling for the pelts and clutching them to your sternum.

“You’re up,” he says gruffly, stepping through the threshold.

You scramble back, eyes widening in fear. He pauses.

You’re afraid, he realises, tilting his head to the side. This may be more difficult than he initially thought.

“Soup,” he says slowly, holding out the small clay bowl in his hands. “You need to eat.”

“Who are you?” you ask. Your voice is patchy and frail. “Where am I?”

He sets the dish down onto his dresser before shooting you a stern, expectant look.

“Eat.”

Upon exiting the room, he strains his ears and listens carefully. The creak of a loose floorboard—you’ve climbed out of bed. The sound of nimble footsteps pattering across the ground—you’re moving toward the door. And finally, the quiet scrape of clay against wood, indicating that your hunger has prevailed.

He nods to himself.

You’re not dead. That’s a start.

~*~

That evening, Harry is perched next to the firepit outside the cabin. The orange sun crawls down the horizon, kissing the tops of the trees. He basks in the warmth, knowing that it will soon be eradicated by the cool chill of nightfall.

He fiddles with the spit poised above the flames. He caught another rabbit, today. The creature’s fur is laid out across the grass, scrubbed clean of blood. The rest of it cooks over the fire, darkening with each passing minute.

A faint creak reaches Harry’s ears. He perks up, glancing at the door.

You hover just beyond the threshold, leaning nervously against the strong wooden beams. Harry relaxes and turns back around. He uses a long stick to poke at the charred logs; the kindling pops, and a few embers float into the air.

“What are you doing?” Your inquiry is soft, shaky.

His reply is curt: “Dinner.”

You approach warily, bare feet treading through the grass. When you spot the hunk of meat roasting over the flames, a feeble gasp tumbles from your lips.

“That’s barbaric.”

Harry rubs his palms against his thighs. “That’s sustenance.”

He stands, and you retreat. His attention then falls to your torso. You’ve covered yourself with the furs from his room; they hang just past the swell of your bottom, rendering you exceptionally vulnerable. Goosebumps crop up on your bare thighs, visible in the golden light of the sunset.

He hums. “You need clothes.”

You look down at the ground.

“That would be nice,” you whisper at last.

He merely grunts in response.

You follow him back inside, albeit from a distance. He strolls into his bedroom, pausing in front of a large trunk shoved against the far wall. Twin latches click open, and he begins rifling through its contents. After a few moments of silence, he produces a pale linen shirt and a pair of dark leather trousers.

“Here,” he says.

He dumps the fabric into your arms. You huff in surprise, instinctively relinquishing your hold on the pelts covering your body. They fall to the floor in a heap, exposing every inch of your skin.

An embarrassed squeak echoes in the back of your throat. Harry averts his eyes, staring pointedly up at the ceiling.

“Put those on,” he murmurs.

You nod quickly, sidestepping his broad frame. Now that you’re no longer in his line of sight, he lowers his gaze. Part of him wonders if he should say something else, but he decides against it. His legs carry him forward, and he disappears through the door.

~*~

You emerge from the bedroom a short while later, smoothing your hands over your hair in an attempt to look a bit more presentable. Harry resists the urge to tell you that here, in the mountains, appearances are hardly significant. He doesn’t own a mirror—such luxuries can only be afforded by the rich.

His clothes are too big on you, but that was to be expected. You’ve rolled up the sleeves of his linen shirt and cuffed the brown leather trousers so that they cinch at your ankles. You’re anxious, incisors gnawing on your bottom lip and eyes darting around the clearing, like you’re waiting for a monster to burst forth from the bushes.

“Here.”

Harry cuts a sliver of meat from the cooked rabbit carcass resting on the spit. You sit down on a wide, round tree stump as he holds the food out in your direction.

At first, he thinks that you may vomit. Fortunately, though, he finds himself mistaken. After a long moment of deliberation, you accept the protein, bringing it up to your nose and sniffing it warily.

��It’s good,” he rasps, slicing off another strip for himself. “Rabbit—all white meat.”

He pops the piece into his mouth and chews. Slowly, you copy him, sighing happily as newfound flavour erupts over your tongue. You waste no time, then, impatiently shoving the rest of the meat into your mouth.

Harry’s lips twitch.

“Thank you,” you say after swallowing.

He simply nods. The two of you continue to eat in silence, grinding the remnants of supper between your teeth.

Eventually, your curiosity overwhelms you.

“What’s you name?” you ask, timid.

Harry sits back, wiping his dagger with the hem of his cotton shirt.

“Harry.”

“And how did you find me, Harry?”

A low chuckle resonates in the back of his throat.

“Wasn’t exactly hard. You were lying in a puddle of mud not far from here.”

Your lips part. “How long have I been asleep?”

“Three days.”

“Three days?”

“Yes.”

“I don’t remember any of it,” you say softly, playing with your fingers. You hesitate before elaborating: “But I—I remember seeing your face. I thought you were a bear.”

He recalls that day, how you lifted your head weakly and uttered the word before sinking back into unconsciousness. It led him to believe that you’d been attacked. Your side of the story, however, proves much more entertaining.

“Well,” he says, exhaling brusquely, “I’m not.”

You examine him with big, tender eyes. He shifts awkwardly under the intensity of your gaze.

“No,” you finally agree. “You’re not.”

He swallows and flips the conversation around.

“Who are you?”

You stiffen, caught off-guard.

“That is…hardly relevant.”

“Perhaps,” Harry says. “But it is fair.”

When you don’t reply, he continues.

“You’re a lady, aren’t you?” he guesses. “A duchess. Your gown was too pretty to have belonged to a commoner.”

“My gown?” You perk up at the mention of the dress. “Where is it?”

“Gone. I tore through it.”

You gasp. “Why on earth would you do that?”

“It was the only way to keep you alive,” he says simply. “Your corset was impeding your ability to breathe.”

“My corset…” you mutter, mostly to yourself. You grimace after registering the implications of his words, thoroughly scandalized. “So, you—you—?”

“Yes. I had to.”

“God,” you choke out, covering your mouth. “How dare you? You should have just—!”

“Let you die?”

His query successfully squashes your disapproval; your lips flatten into a thin line, and you say nothing else. Harry watches the creases in your forehead dwindle as you realise that he’s right. You fiddle with the collar of your shirt, turning to the side and regaining your composure.

“Thank you,” you finally murmur, trying to hide your face from his piercing stare, “for not letting me die.”

He grunts. “You’re welcome.”

Brief silence ensues. A light breeze blows through the clearing, tousling the curls atop Harry’s head. The gust is enough to extinguish the last few flames frolicking over the kindle, until glowing embers are all that remain.

“I am a lady,” you suddenly add, though you refuse to meet his eyes. “But not a duchess.”

Harry leans forward, prodding at the residual ash in the firepit.

“What were you doing in the woods?”

You tinker with the bandages wrapped around your injured wrist.

“I was to be wed,” you confess, peeking up at him. “But I—I could not bear to go through with it. One should not marry for duty, but rather—”

“For love?”

You pause at his intrusion, lips parted in surprise.

“Yes,” you breathe. “For love.”

Your gazes lock. He clears his throat, breaking the contact quickly.

“You ran away, then.”

It’s not a question. You nod, and he hums.

“What is it?” you ask, brows knitting together.

“Nothing. It’s just…I may find good fortune in this situation.”

“How so?”

He shrugs. “Any man with sense would carry you down this peak, deliver you back to your family, and collect a hefty reward.”

Though he’s not looking at you, he can tell that you’ve recoiled.

“Please don’t,” you whisper.

He examines your face in the periphery of his vision. Your eyes glisten with unshed tears.

Just then, Magnus races out of the cabin, his tail wagging eagerly behind him. He trots over to you, sniffing your shoulder and releasing a high-pitched whine. You use one hand to swipe hastily at your cheeks; the other migrates to his head, tickling his floppy ears.

Harry watches the interaction unfold, completely stunned.

“He—he likes you.”

You glance over at him, still wary of his previous threat.

“I suppose he does,” you say quietly.

Magnus paws at your thighs. You direct your attention back to the keen bloodhound, pressing a feathery kiss to the tip of his wet nose.

Harry blinks a few times, trying to pinpoint the reason for his mutt’s newfound behaviour. At first, he wonders if his eyes are simply playing tricks on his brain. Yet with each flutter of his lids, the sight before him only seems to solidify.

“He doesn’t usually take well to strangers,” he mumbles.

When you don’t respond, he clenches his jaw tightly. Countless thoughts zoom through his head, spinning like wheels, tangling like thread.

Any man with sense would carry you down this peak, deliver you back to your family, and collect a hefty reward.

Harry is not a sensible man.

~*~

The three of you retreat indoors when the last shards of sunlight fade from the sky. Magnus circles the large woven rug poised in front of the hearth. Eventually, he collapses onto the mat, his snout drooping over his front paws. You stretch your arms into the air and yawn gently.

Harry is the last one to enter the cabin; he shuts the door behind him.

“Thank you again for dinner,” you say lightly.

You spin around and nearly crash into the hard barrier of his chest. Reflexively, his hands fly up to grasp your biceps, steadying you. He peers down at your face in the darkness, his thoughtful gaze tracing the contours of your cheeks. Your eyes are wide, lips split apart as you suck in air.

“Sorry,” you say, frozen in place.

He only grunts, releasing your arms and stepping away.

Your attention lingers on him as he approaches a wide pile of furs stacked into the corner of the room. He’s been sleeping on the makeshift cot for the past three nights, and though his back is always sore the next morning, he has yet to find a better alternative.

“What are you���?” You hesitate, rethinking your question. “What is that?”

“My bed.”

“Do you…always sleep there?”

“No,” he rasps, lowering himself onto the thick pelts. “I prefer to sleep in my room.”

He shoots you a pointed look, and you frown when the realisation sinks in.

“We—we can switch,” you say, fidgeting with the hem of your shirt. “I don’t want to impose.”

“No.”

“I insist.” You try again.

“As do I.”

You clamp your mouth shut, unsure of how to respond. Magnus has already dozed off—his soft snores filter through the heavy silence hanging over your heads.

“He’s lovely,” you suddenly say, referring to the quiescent hound. “Well-trained, too.”

“I won’t take credit for that,” Harry grumbles, rubbing his palms against his thighs. “He was a palace dog.”

You blink. “W-what?”

“A palace dog,” he repeats. “I found him alone in the woods after a hunt. His leg was broken—the guards left him there to die.”

“That’s awful.”

He hums in agreement.

“You took him in, then,” you say. When he nods, you add, “It seems that you have a knack for nursing others back to health.”

He doesn’t reply.

“The hunts—” you start, chewing nervously on your bottom lip. “Do they…occur frequently?”

“Why do you ask?” Harry says. His shoulders wobble with a hollow chuckle. “Are you afraid of being caught?”

You inhale sharply, and he realises that yes, you are.

“No,” he says, shaking his head. Subconsciously, his voice drops an octave, taking on a soothing quality. “They don’t come around often. And even if they did, I doubt that a single runaway lady would be of much concern.”

You blow out a relieved sigh, though the uneasy expression on your face never wanes.

“You’re probably right.”

A few hushed seconds draw out, during which neither of you speak. Your bare feet shuffle clumsily against the cold floor. You appear to be waiting for some sort of cue—a sound, a gesture, anything.

“Er—” Harry breaks the peace, cocking one eyebrow. “I sleep naked.”

“Oh.”

The exclamation is unbelievably breathless. Your throat bobs amidst a difficult swallow, and you totter back.

“Of course,” you stammer. “I’ll just—”

With a trembling hand, you motion toward the entrance of his bedroom.

He nods wordlessly.

“Right,” you mumble, retreating. “Goodnight, then…Bear.”

At that, he pauses. Your cheeks twitch with a feeble smile, but you don’t comment on the sweetness of the simple endearment.

Harry remains completely still as you scurry into his room. He sits there for a prolonged moment after the door shuts, trying to make sense of his thoughts. Your features have been stamped onto the backs of his eyelids, practically seared into the skin.

At last, warm air spills past his lips, and he allows himself to utter the low, relentless reply pulling at his tongue.

“Goodnight.”

[henry-hart]

The Danger Begins s1 ep1

I’m so glad I decided to rewatch this because it made me so happy!!!! (also, to keep you guys from getting uber annoyed with me, i’m just gonna lb on one big post like this from now on lolol)

first off

s1 henry was the cutest thing to ever exist. ever. my heart couldn’t take it bc he’s so grown now but in that first ep he’s this adorable little baby chick ajdksjslk

it was so incredible to see Siren on my screen. Like, within thirty seconds BAM there she was. i felt blessed, like she blessed my laptop

PIPER. MY OVERDRAMATIC DAUGHTER. I miss her “I am NOT okay!!!” catchphrase akdjlsj 

her “so we’re living like animals now” reply to being told to wait for her video to load---same girl, same.

Henry at 13 was a million times more proactive about the whole job search than I have ever been and I’m 22 sksjskjsk

his whole “I’m not good at anything. I’m a big ball of average”---I feel that lol

“No special skills needed.” “That’s me!!” 

okay one of Char’s first lines was “One day when you two are cleaning my pool bc you failed this algebra test...” and it doesn’t get more iconic than that

GOOCH. I HAVE MISSED YOU. 

Ray just coming in with all these ridiculous questions lolol poor Hen

“I’m 13. I’ll be 14....on my next bday.” ajskjsksljk

“Ah, so you’re aging sequentially. I like that. The name’s Ray.” “Nice to meet you, Ray. I’m Henry.” “You ask a lot of questions.” “I....don’t think....I’ve asked any questions...????” loved it

I laughed when Ray changed into his uniform and the zipper got stuck (that never happens again????)

“Did you have to melt my phone???” Hen, sweetie, hate to break it to you, but your phone gets broken.....preeeeetty much every ep (need me a bank account like that where I can steady get new iphones)

WhAt Do YoU mEaN nO sPeCiAl SkIlLs HeNrY???? yOu NoTiCeD tHe TaToO!!!!!! u smart lil cookie

Ray was all “I’m getting old. I can’t do this forever.” Two things: 1) RAY DID YOU JUST REFER TO YOURSELF AND OLD IN THE SAME SENTENCE??? 2) why is this never mentioned again??? Like, Ray got a sidekick to pass the mantle onto someone younger to keep protecting Swellview when he’s done. We’re like 4 yrs down the line, and they haven’t even hinted towards CM retiring??? (I know that would mean the end of the show, but they could at least bring it up every now and then)

OK. hated the toddler then. hate him now. 

Props to the props department (ha ha get it???) for all the junk in the store. It’s all so strange and doesn’t make sense and fits the show so well (also it seems like each ep has diff junk??? that’s impressive)

“They seem like nice kids.” “Yeah, they’re names are Jasper x Charlotte. I’ve known them ever since--” “Get rid of them.” “I’ll get rid of them.”

DAWWWW Jasper x his buckets :’))))

“I told you Canadian money upsets ppl!!!” Ah Char (I wonder if Riele comes up with some of these Canada jokes??)

OMG I FORGOT ABOUT HEN’S HORRIBLE TEST WARDROBE. IMAGINE IF THEY HAD KEPT ONE OF THOSE IDEAS AKSJLKSJ (there really wasn’t any need for a whole test wardrobe tho--just style an outfit to fits Ray’s. His obvs works out well for him) (I know that’s what they ended up doing lolol)

Okay, Ray’s “Oh man. I ate a lot of fruit.” line KILLS. ME. bc when i first watched this ep, every time the scene changed and Ray was shown w/ a diff fruit, I was like, “Why...is he eating so much fruit????” bc they’re all diff and he even eats a whole pineapple--outside peel and all. BUT I WAS THINKING IT AND THEN HE SAID IT AND IT MADE IT ONE MILLION TIMES FUNNIER.

LIL BB HEN IN HIS SUIT FOR THE FIRST TIME. I CRY. HE’S SO TINY AND HAPPY

“Chew gum. Blow bubble. Fight crime.” Ray wrote those instructions. I just know it. aksjskl

“And what does a single flashing light mean?” “Just to shoot me a text, you know, whenever.” aksjklsk

HENRY JUST GAVE HIS PLEDGE. THEN. HE. SAID. THE. ICONIC. “FEELS GOOD” FOR. THE. FIRST. TIME. I’M CRYING.

Hen not knowing how to get the tubes to work and just jumping up and down making noises aksjlsk

“Affirmative.” “That means ‘yes’.” “I got that.” and so the sass begins lolol love it

“Awwww no! That was my favorite bridge!”

“I hate my life and I am NOT okay.” i feel u Pipes

the sass is strong in those Hart kids. Siren x Jake can’t catch a break aksjslk

Siren. Hart. Is. So. Beautiful. her hair just looks so good this ep

“I’ll run away. I’ll do it.” ajskjskl Pipes chill

Jake....Siren...that’s....your son on the tv screen...like.....that’s literally your child’s face.....the product of both of your genes is right there.....plastered on the screen.....how do u....not....recognize him?????

“Two ppl said they might come.” “Who?” “Sidney Birnbaum and Oliver Pook.” “Ew.” “Those guys eat bugs.” “So? They’re people.” I just love the kid’s line delivery here lolol

I just want everyone to know that s1 Henry is the cutest. I already said it, but I’m saying it again. 

Henry panicking bc he doesn’t want C x J to keep reading about KD but he also doesn’t know what to do so he just throws a glass and smacks C’s phone out of her hand and clean across the room ajskjslk SAME

Jace was so.....twitchy in the first two seasons. He’s really mellowed---which I understand it happens when you get older---but it’s just so funny to see this little bean with all his crazy expressions and loud outbursts and rapid movements lolol

Hey Lelani? You’re hot (give me ukelele lessons pls)

“The toddler’s men stole 5,000 packages of diapers. Can you guess why?” “Uhhhh???” “To bombard the diapers with radioactive zenite particles.” “.....I would not have guessed that.”

also Ray getting lower to the ground as he talks and Hen just following is so funny to me. Ray was really extra in that first ep 

RAYMOND MANCHESTER HOW DARE YOU GET MAD AT HEN FOR WANTING TO GO TO HIS BFF’S BDAY PARTY INSTEAD OF FIGHTING CRIME. HE IS 13. AND YOU WOULD LATER CALL HIM UP WITH THE EMERGENCY ALARM PAST 12 AT NIGHT FOR CORNDOGS, SO I DON’T WANT TO HEAR IT.

“Okay. Okay. It’s cool. You go to Jasper’s party. I’ll handle the toddler by myself. Don’t worry about it.” “Are you sure?” “Yeah. I’ve battled the toddler alone before--almost killed me, but whatever.” and u still want to take a 13 yr old out there??? Ray.

“No, I’m not bringing the muffins!” but u said u would

okay, but the news jumping from CM’s kidnapping to a report on why squirrels love nuts???? TOO tru (they really do that “here’s something serious. kids are dying. now here’s this pointless and meaningless crap” lolol)

“I can’t talk! I’m naked!” friends anyone??? (“You can’t come in. Ross is naked.” “Why’d you tell her I was naked???” “I couldn’t tell her I was naked. She’s allowed to see me naked.” “Why does anyone have to be naked???”) (sorry i just love friends akjslkjs)

I FORGOT WHAT IT WAS LIKE TO HAVE SIDNEY X OLIVER ON MY SCREEN. I LOVE THEM. 

I hate u toddler. just in case you were doubting.

Jasper unknowingly saving the day by downloading that sound effect app on Hen’s phone *claps for him*

Henry just....completely kicking butt on his second day???? That’s my son.

“Captain Man!” “Henry!” “It’s Kid Danger.” :))))) I’M SQUEALING. I’M SO PROUD OF HIM. HIS LIL POINT TO RAY AND THAT SMALL SMILE. TOO. CUTE. (also Ray just namedropping like they don’t have identities to protect)

“How do I get you out of there?” “I don’t know. This is the first time I’ve been stuck in a baby bouncer hovering over a bottomless ball pit.” CALL SUPERHEROES OUT, RAY. all these extravagant traps they’re caught in and they just....know what to do??? Doubtful. (bottomless pits are impossible, but you know lol)

Ray swinging around everywhere in that baby bouncer was hilarious alkjdlksj

that spitting device is the literal WORST thing i have ever seen. i freaking hate spit.

God, i wish the toddler had stayed tf down there in that ball pit. i wish that bottle had blown him to the center of the earth. (sorry i just really don’t like him akdjslj)

“What do we do with this? (the bottle bomb)” “We give the baby his bottle.” “Ah. Good call.” “Hey.” “Suuuuup.” “Hurry.” “Oh, right.” aksjlsksjl there are some really good moments in this ep

Ray shielding Henry was <33333 (it would be really messed up if he hadn’t considering he’s indestructible, but I like to think that he chose to)

AJKSJSKLSKSJLK HENRY’S FACE WHEN RAY TOLD HIM “GOOD JOB” WAS SOOOOOOO PRECIOUS. He looked so shocked. Like, “CM thinks I did a good job????” 

It’s like, Henry’s second day on the job, and they’re just namedropping right and left. Why be careful???? It’s not like they have secret identities or anything.....(they steady use their real names. i guess they don’t really have to worry. C must be the only smart person in Swellview bc no one else seems capable of figuring it out. I mean, not even his parents recognized him ajksjslk)

If you need any proof that Ray is a good guy, just watch this ep. His willingness to show up to J’s party despite only knowing Hen for like two days is a solid testament to his character. This is the Ray I know and love.

awwwwww poor Jasp. your party isn’t a flop. It’s about to be lit af because your bff is HENRY FREAKING HART, THE SWEETEST BOY TO EVER LIVE.

Ray, your excuse is horrible. “My van broke down across the street so I decided to come into this house and into this basement.” alskjlskj what is that????

“You’re CM!” “Thank you.” “You’re my hero!” “Of course.” oh Ray

Henry’s just watching J freak out over CM, watching how excited and happy J is and knowing he did that for him, and it’s just----my heart is all ajkdjlsjks

Char is the cutest in this ep. she’s fangirling over CM, and it’s so weird bc now she can’t stand him lolol

Hen x Ray pretending they don’t know each other. SO. PRECIOUS. Ray’s face is so sweet and they share this secret smile and just GAHHHH

J asking CM if he can hit him w/ a bball bat alksjlk “Remember kids: never do this to anyone but CM bc regular ppl could be badly inju--AHHHHHH.......I wasn’t done talking.” “Did that hurt?” “Yeah. But I’m okay.” the way Ray says yeah cracks me up bc it’s like, duh it hurt. it was a bat hitting my head lolol

“Hey, CM?” “Yes, boy?” “Would it be ok if Jasp texted a few friends and told them you were here at his party?” “Suuurrreeee. I love being used.” Ray kills me. cooper x jace have some of the best line delivery/comedic timing akdjslkj

*J is shaking CM’s hand* “Thank you so much! This is the best day of my life!” “Ha ha, are your hands always this sweaty?” “Yes sir.” “He takes medicine for it.” “Wellllll, it’s not working.” *wipes hand on J and leaves wet mark* ajsklj poor Jasper

Henry brought the muffins after all <33333 “Muffins.” “Yeah.” (you can tell Jace x Sean were already good friends. so cute.)

Hen x Char got Jasp the bucket from the shop that Gooch wouldn’t let him have. Dawwwwww

“For awhile there, I thought you weren’t gonna come.” “Come on, man. I’ll always be there for you.” then. they. hug. they’re. so. cute. i. love. solid. friendships.

HENRY’S LAST LITTLE LOOK AT THE PARTY BEFORE HE LEAVES IS THE BEST THING EVER. THE LITTLE NOD HE MAKES LIKE, “YEAH. THIS IS GOOD.” LIKE, HE’S PERFECTLY OK WITH MISSING OUT SO LONG AS EVERYONE ELSE IS HAVING FUN. AHHHHHH. I LOVE HIM SO MUCH. :)))))) <3333333

that was a perfect way to end an ep

<3

I’m glad I watched this. I’ve forgotten most of the earlier episodes which is a crime because they’re so good. It was hard to see Jace so little when he’s so grown now!!!!! My heart couldn’t take it. But lil Henry is precious and I love him. Stay tuned for more rewatches!!!! xoxoxox

[ngirl64]

Similar Interests Part 21

Rose: *She sighs happily, then giggles* If Pit and Carol start dating, would that make Vallerie their child? I mean, Carol already acts like a mom to her.

Dark Pit: hmm, didn’t think about that but I guess it would. Heheh, Pit acts like a playful father to the kid too.

Rose: Kind of makes me a bit jealous.

Dark Pit: Yeah?

Rose: Yeah, just a little though

Dark Pit: You want a kid someday, huh?

Rose: *She blushes bright red* W-Well I….Uhhhh. Um..*She hides her face in embarrassment*

Dark Pit: *He laughs a bit and his own blush reappears* I’ll take that as a yes

Rose: *She looks away still red faced* I-I Never said y-yes…

Dark Pit: *He smiles to her* You didn’t need to. *He kisses her cheek* I think it’d be cute to see a little Rose running around

Rose: *She blushes even more* I-I’m n-n-not quite ready f-for th-that yet.

Dark Pit: Heheh, That’s fine. We’ll go through this at a comfortable pace

Rose: *She lets out a squeak.* Dark Pit!!!! *She pulls up her face mask to hide her whole face*

Dark Pit: *He laughed more* Haha. sorry, but you embarrassed me so now it’s my turn to embarrass you

Rose: *She shoves Dark Pit* Jerk. 

Dark Pit: Heheh. Sorry, Rose

Rose: *She doesn’t say anything but lowers her face mask. Her hand moves to Dark Pit’s wings and she starts petting them.* 

Dark Pit: *He smiles to her and puts a wing around her*

Vallerie: *Runs up to Rose and Dark Pit* awe wou twu gwnna gwt mawwied?

Carol: *Right behind Vallerie* Vallerie! You don’t ask people that!

Dark Pit: *His face turned red* u-uuhh… I-I…

Vallerie: Bwt Bwt. dey would bw coote togwether.

Dark Pit: W-well, we’ll just have to see w-what the future holds

Pit: *He knelt down to Vallerie* Hehe. they would, wouldn’t they?

Rose: P-Pit! S-Stop that!

Vallerie: Yay! Pwt says yeth too!!!!

Pit: Hehe, what? An angel’s gotta tell the truth *He teases*

Dark Pit: Keep it up and i’ll hit you

Rose: Same here Pit

Pit: *Although used to being hit by Dark Pit, he didn’t want to get hit by Rose. he nervously laughed* Oook, i’ll stop. I’m setting a bad example for Vallerie anyway, heh…

Vallerie: *She yawned and walked of to Pit* Upsies. *She raised her hands up* pwease?

Pit: Alright *He picks her up* Someone sleepy?

Vallerie: *She nods and snuggles into him*

Rose: *She pokes Dark Pit then points to Pit and Vallerie.*

Dark Pit: *He looks to them and smirks* Heh, how sweet

Carol: *Walks away with Pit*

Rose: They’d make a good pair of parents

Dark Pit: Yeah, agreed. 

Rose: *She turns back to Dark Pit* So, what you said earlier...Were you being honest or just trying to embarrass me?

Dark Pit: U-umm.. W-well, both. But like you, i’m not ready

Rose: I-I know. I j-just wanted to be sure…

Dark Pit: Alright

*A little while later*

Rose: *Sits down at the table in order to eat*

Dark Pit: *He sits next to her*

Pit: *He also sat at the table, along with Palutena. As usual, Pit quickly begins to eat*

Carol: *She was cutting up food for Vallerie to eat before she started to eat too.*

Vallerie: *Grabs a carrot of her plate and starts chewing it*

Rose: So Pit, what’s it like being able to fly now? You like it?

Pit: *He eats the food in his mouth before talking* It’s great. I love it. I can say thank you so many more times, but i’m sure you’ve heard that enough, heheh

Rose: Yeah. I have. *She smiles thinking about everything that had led to this* And to think this stuff may not have happened like this if I hadn’t been in that town.

Pit: Yeah. crazy to think that a single encounter can lead to so much

Rose: *She takes a bite of food* Heh, if I hadn’t been there, I would be with Dark PIt. My edgy angel. *She give him a quick kiss on the cheek* 

Dark Pit: *He blushes and smiles* Mhmm. So glad i met you, Rose.

Pit: Aww

Vallerie: *Grabs a piece of the meat that Carol had cut for her and shoves it in her mouth*

Carol: Vallerie! *She grabs a napkin and cleans off Vallerie’s face* Use the fork and spoon, like I’ve been teaching you.

Pit: Heheh…

Dark Pit: *He continues eating*

Palutena: *She was just watching and giggling every so often*

Rose: Carol, you really act like a mother to her, even though she took care of you for a while.

Carol: *She giggles nervously* Well, I’m a fairly young angel, but my job was taking care of the babies born in my skyworld. You know, the one for the other dimension. So child care comes naturally to me.

Vallerie: *Swallows the food in her mouth* I wike Cawol! She wike anfer mommy for me!

Pit: Aww, that’s sweet.

Vallerie: *She puts another piece of food in her mouth and nods*

Rose: *Finished eating she stands up* I would assume the room that Dark Pit and i stayed in is still available?

Palutena: Yes and always will be for whenever you visit *she smiled*

Dark Pit: *He soon finished eating*

Rose: *walks to the room. Once she gets there she flops on the bed*

Dark Pit: *He followed along* You ok, there?

Rose: Yeah, just happy. *She smiles* Everything seems so surreal as of now

Dark Pit: Heh, yeah. *He set next to her* 

Rose: *She smirked playfully and grabbed Dark Pit, pulling him down.* Got you. *She kissed him but pulled away quickly*

Dark Pit: Heheh. *Smirking also, he retaliates with pinning her and ready to tickle* Got you

Rose: *She squirms* No fair! You’re way stronger than me!

Dark Pit: Maybe *He starts to tickle her*

Rose: *She starts laughing.* N-No! D-Dark Pit!!

Dark Pit: Heheh *He tickles for a bit longer*

Rose: *She continues to laugh* P-Pleeeasee! Stooooop

Dark Pit: *He stops* Alright, I’ll stop

Rose: *She calms down her breathing and realizes he’s still got her pinned* You, uhhhh, gonna stay like that? *She Mumbles under her breath* Not that I mind. 

Dark Pit: *He blushes once she says* U-uumm… Heheh *He doesn’t move but kisses her*

Rose: *She returns the kiss and pulls him closer*

Dark Pit: *His wings relax, making the kiss deeper as she pulls him closer*

Rose: *She moves a hand to his hair and pulls him even closer.*

Dark Pit: *Making the kiss as deep possible, he then pushes his tongue into her mouth*

Rose: *She moans softly*

Dark Pit: *His blush darkens a bit, exploring her mouth with his tongue*

Rose: *she started to push her tongue into his mouth*

Dark Pit: *He continued, opening his mouth more*

Rose: *She starts exploring his mouth her tongue*

Dark Pit: *He moves a hand, gently placing it on her cheek and bringing himself closer to her*

Rose: *She moves her tongue so he could go back to exploring her mouth*

Dark Pit: *He does so. After a while, he pulls away, panting*

Rose: *Also panting, she blushes* heh

Dark Pit: Heheh. *unable to talk yet*

Rose: *She smiles.* Y-You sure know h-how to take my breath away.

Dark Pit: *He smirks* W-well, you leave m-me speechless~

Rose: *She blushes even more* Sh-Shut it

Dark Pit: Heheh. *His own blush darkens* I-I know i haven’t s-said anything before, b-but you’re cute when you blush

Rose: *She pushes Dark Pit off of her.* I’m not cute!

Dark Pit: *He chuckles* Whatever you say. But you are in my eyes

Rose: *She blushes even more* Th-Thanks.

Dark Pit: No problem~ *He smiles warmly*

Rose: *She hugs him and starts to fall asleep*

Dark Pit: *He hugs back, falling asleep with her*

RP Master Post

[xxtangledintentions]

I can't fall back asleep

1. You woke up naked next to the last person you texted, what would you say? I’d be very confused bc he’s in Illinois currently lol

2. What’s going on between you and the last person you kissed? Uhhh literally nothing he stopped talking to me.

3. If your boyfriend or girlfriend was into drugs, would you care? Dont have one.

4. Is your last name longer than six letters? Nope

5. Was your last kiss drunk or sober? Sober but hungover

6. Have you ever wanted to have someone but you messed it up? Oh gosh yeah

7. What does your last received text say? “Sorry I didn’t take her out”

8. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed? Uhhh continuously over a period of 3 days idk how many times.

9. Where was your last kiss at? Lisbon, OH

10. When is the last time you saw your sister? Saw 2 of them at the end of April

11. What do you drink in the morning? Juice or water

12. Where did you sleep last night? My bed.

13. Do you think relationships are hard? Ehhhhhh

14. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you? Yeah quite a few things honestly

15. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, any problems? Yeah I’d be asking him wtf his deal is

16. Would you rather it be sunny or rainy? Sunshine pls

17. Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you? I’m sure

18. Are you wearing jeans,sweatpants,or pajama pants? pj

19. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 years from now? I goddamn hope so

20. Does anyone like you? Doubtful

21. Have you ever kissed someone with a name that starts with an S? Probably?

22. Is the last person you kissed gay? No

23. Is there a person you CANNOT stand? Yes

24. Have you ever considered getting a tattoo? I have five.

25. In the past week have you cried? Nope.

26. What breed was the last dog you saw? My sweet pup, shes Great Dane and greyhound.

27. Do you dry off in the shower or out of the shower? Out

28. Have you ever kissed a football player? I’m sure I have

29. Do you think you’re old? Gettin there :(

30. Do you like text messaging? When I actually feel like responding. Lately I’ve been not responding to anyone.

31. What type of day are you having? It’s too early to tell.

32. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced? I had it pierced previously

33. Do you prefer warm or cold weather? WARM

34. Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you? mhm

35. Would you prefer a relationship or a fling? Fuck this question

36. Are you a simple or complicated person? Complicated

37. What song are you listening to? I’m not

38. When you say you’re sorry do you mean it? Yeah

39. Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you? Mhmmmmm

40. What made you start liking the person you like now? Why are u assuming I like anyone right now??? PS I don’t

41. When did you last receive a text message? Right after I started this dumb thing

42. What is wrong with you right now? Too much

43. How well do you know the last female you texted? Incredibly well she’s been my best friend since I was 16

44. Does anyone disgust you? Chyeah

45. Would you date someone right now if they asked? Probably not.

46. Are you in a good mood right now? No

47. Who was the last person you talked to in person? Hansen

48. What color shirt are you wearing? White

49. Has someone recently told you something you didn’t want to hear? story of my life I never wanna hear anything

50. Anyone you’re giving up on? Myself

51. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for? Not at all

52. Have you ever thought about giving up on someone but couldn’t? What does this even mean

53. Do you like rain? Nah

54. Do you care if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks? Single AS A PRINGLE YO

55. Have you ever liked somebody and never told them? Yeah I’m sure I have

56. Do you like to cuddle? Yeah

57. Are you shy? Uhhhhhhhhhh

58. Do you get along with girls? Mostly

59. Have you dated the person you texted last? Nope

60. What do you carry with you at all times? Phone

61. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you? Not by myself

62. Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months? Yeah

63. Think back to October, were you in a relationship? Nope

64. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute? Oh my god I don’t like anyone jfc

65. Did anything “cute” happen in the last week? I ate a whole jar of pickles 🙃

66. How old are the last three people you kissed? LAST 3???? Uhhhh 22,24,28.

67. Would you rather pay to get your nails done or do them yourself? Neither

68. Which do you like better- Zebra print or leopard print? Leopard

69. Do you have any stickers on your car? Hell yeah! “Resist and persist” “TCB” “turpentine creek wildlife refuge” “fayetteville Arkansas, its great, Please dont move here”

70. Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne? Luke I guess

71. Blackberry, Anroid, or iPhone? iPhone

72. When’s the last time you had pizza from Pizza Hut? Couple months ago

73. Do you like diet soda? Shit no

74. What color are the walls in your room? Boring white

75. Are you 16 or older? 25

76. Do you watch Pretty Little Liars? No

77. Do you have a job? Not currently

78. What are your initials? MJS

79. Did you ever have braces? NOPE

80. Are you from the south? I grew up in the north but I’ve lived in the south for four years now

81. What does your last status on facebook say? Something about how to get away with murder

82. Do you still talk to the first person you ever kissed? Uhhh sometimes, we grew up together so

83. Are you closer to your mom or your dad? Dads deceased so

84. Have you ever done cheerleading or gymnastics? Nope

85. What’s the last movie you saw in theaters? I have no idea. Maybe the newest purge

86. Do you smoke? F no

87. Would you rather wear heels or flip flops? Flipsssss

88. Is your phone touch screen? Yeah and it’s being annoying af rn

89. Do you normally wear your hair straight or curly? Neither I just let it air dry and hope for the best

90. Have you ever snuck out of your house? I mean when I was a teenager yes

91. Would you rather swim in a river, lake, or pool? Pool

92. Have you ever made out in a car? Lmao yeah

93. …Had sex in a car? Yep

94. Are you single or in a relationship? READ ABOVE ANSWERS JFCCCC

95. What were you doing last night at midnight? SLEEPING

96. When’s the last time you saw fireworks? Uhhhhhhhhhhh

97. Do you like the camera on your phone? Not really it kinda sucks

98. Have you ever had a friend with benefits? Sure? I guess

99. Have you ever passed out from drinking? Many times 100. Are you friends with people on facebook that you actually hate? IDK maybe

101. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare? Yeah

102. Name your favorite Kesha song: Cannibal 😈

103. Do you have any tan lines right now? HAHAHAHHAHA no

104. Would you ever wear cowboy boots with shorts? Not a chance in hell