#uhhh that doesn't super sound like a contract/moving back to the states thing guys

[nakanotamu]

[thestarsearcher]

alright alright here's the cillian lore because you asked. this shit is crazy.

i met this guy back in 2022 and we weren't super close at first. then found out that we were gonna be in disney world at the same time. so we met up a few times over that trip and it was pretty great. he breaks up with his gf and tries to make me his rebound (i was identifying as a lesbian at this time i had little to no attraction to men so he was getting his hopes up for nothing) he was also close with my cousin and asked her to have sex with him, which her very Christian ass said "bitch fuck no"

he confesses his feelings for me and im like "sorry dude nuh uh". so we're planning our second time seeing each other and while we're there we hold hands and his (his hands were so damn sweaty) and yeah apparently his feelings never went away, and platonic hand holding doesn't exist to him

so in april of 2023 he gets with this aroace person, they break it off bcs well. they're aroace. and im attempting to comfort him and then he ghosts me for 3 days and i assume he's just dead. (this is where my dislike of ghosting first begins so yeah fuck you new person ghosting me WHO KNEW ALL ABOUT THIS. smh and people still try and defend them). anyways uh during this time i grow *feelings* because im left alone thinking he's dead. he comes back, does this whole apology thing, and then i start flirting with him because what else is my 14 year old ass supposed to do?

important uh. he's 3 years older than me. he just turned 19. this is uh. important

ok so during this time he meets my one irl friend and they get close. and he basically forces us into a love triangle. im having on and off feelings for him and become VERY codependent on him. so we meet up again and we kiss. it sucked. would not recommend. AND HE LIKE??? HADN'T SHAVED??? so yeah not a fan. anyways he then goes on to say my one friend is cute and it just puts a bad taste in my mouth.

now here's the wild shit.

after he leaves he sends me this what i like to call contract. in this contract it states that if we were to be together, i wouldn't be allowed to be with anyone else, no one could know until i was 19, and i would have to H A V E H I S C H I L D R E N.

IM BEING SO SERIOUS RIGHT NOW.

so i back off and we stay friends for a bit on and off flirting. he's uncomfortable with it though because he's "not gay" and im trans. so he just throws this whole fit about it and it's like. in some weird way kinda transphobic??? like it's weird.

so when he turns 18 he basically ghosts me, and im still very codependent on him and then i start to lose my mind. he's supposed to come and see me, but then cancels a week before. i break things off with him because i just can't do it anymore.

now we're nearly at the present day. in september i find out that he couldn't visit me BECAUSE HE WAS HOMELESS AND HIS PARENTS MOVED TO HAWAII AND HIS DAD GOT ARRESTED. WE THEN START TALKING AGAIN AND HE APOLOGIES FOR EVERYTHING AND IM JUST LOSING MY MIND.

and now. as of today. i find out that he is moving to germany in 8 months and im just like GIRL WHATTTT

and that's the very abridged cillian lore because there's so much more

bro this is so rigged.. dad lore goes crazy for my moots out there.. I dunno what to say, sorry, I'm terrible at this shit. Hope you get better? God, I sound like a fucking jerk but.. GOD DAMMIT I just hope ur better and uhhh stay manly dude!!!