#ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh god fuck. fuckkkkkkkkkkk it's all so stressful
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re: last post... i just remembered how fucked up it makes me feel to hear Rich and careless people's thoughts about all this. one girl told me the other day "well... if it all goes to shit, i can just go to france. i have dual citizenship" and what am i supposed to say to that lol. well i cant. what will happen to me and all the other people who will simply have to live with All This if it all goes to shit indeed
#i need to get out i need to get out i need to#no matter what happens i will HAVE to apply for masters and internships and scholarships and everything this summer#i will have to. i have to be brave about this it's hard but i have to do it#anyway. anyway. im still so fucking angry that i couldve been in a different country next year#but i couldnt get scholarship so i had to scratch that lol#but!! it's fine it just means if i work hard for the applications then i can go somewhere#like that would be a safe guess#but!!! i just have to work hard for the applications... which is incredibly hard to even think abt rn#but im giving myself time until graduation#i have to fix myself and my motivation until then#ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh god fuck. fuckkkkkkkkkkk it's all so stressful#and my brain just wont do anything usefulllll fucking hell i hate being like this#🗒#neg#sorry for the vent </3
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