#ughhhhh idk why is having a crush so silly and fun but having those feelings reciprocated is terrifying and uncomfortable

[aztrosist666]

she held my hand in the lunch line and walking between classes :333333

[la-paritalienne]

all of the floral sapphic asks!

i...... love you?????? yes homo but like no disrespect to your beautiful gf nor to cate blanchett. wow tho 🤧 thank uuuuuuuu

Tulip: favorite perfume? — a vanilla one by santa maria novella that i got in florence over a decade ago (they now also sell in paris but getting it there was magical, it was like time had stopped. + dyptique’s philosykos, geranium and rose.

Pansy: most courageous thing you’ve ever done? — mmm idk, i don’t think of myself as a particularly brave person. maybe not changing class even if i was bullied and going to school every day walking up those stairs, knowing that barely anyone in the room i was headed to would even say hi to me (this particularly at the end of my last year of high school). but then again. was it brave or was it stupid? i’ve also beaten an ed but i wouldn’t call that brave either, although it’s definitely the thing i’ve done that i’m most proud of.

Daffodil: what’s your most attractive quality?  what do you find most attractive in a girlfriend? — ooh i’ve never stopped to wonder this about myself. if i rationalise i think i can be like... an interesting person bc i’m very eclectic and like i can bring a lot to a relationship? as in i can be tender and comforting but also a fool and i guess i’m funny? i have lots of opinions and i’m quite cultured so i can handle serious, deep conversations but i’m also super chill and i’d be content to just watch mindless tv shows all day. idkkkk look at how poorly i’m selling myself here... ugh. okkk. as for a girlfriend, i think someone that challenges me and fascinates me, that has some qualities that i don’t have, someone inspiring.

Cammelia: do you want to have kids? if so, what are some names you like? if not, why? — i kinda do... ophélie / ofelia for a girl. for a boy i’ve only truly thought of rinaldo which was my grandpa’s name and i find it beautiful and i also want to honour him bc he was such a special man. i also really like jean, which is gender neutral which is a plus.

Lilac: do you have any spiritual beliefs? — i do! i believe there’s a god but i also believe in karma and in people’s vibes and in good / evil energies so lots of it, really. i think the world is permeated w energies and w the divine and i want to embrace it. practically, i am closer to a certain kind of belief, but i do realize it’s bc of my upbringing and where i was born, but i feel like there’s nothing wrong with that, intrinsically, although clearly i do not subscribe to everything ‘the church’ preaches. 

Snowdrop: what’s the perfect climate for you? — sunny and warm enough that you can sunbathe and feel the heath on your skin but fresh enough that you don’t sweat.

Cherry Blossom: do you have any lucky objects or superstitions you do for luck? — loooots. amulets, presents from people who love me, a bit of salt in my pocket or underneath my doormat against negative energies...

Peony: do you want to get married? if so, what would you want your wedding to be like? — YESSSS UGH i want it to be simple and chic and young and filled with laughter and happiness and i want my parents to cry and my wife to wear a white suit w no shirt underneath (i’ll wear a dress) and a huge buffet and i want everyone to have the best time ughhhhh i want it so much and i never thought i would. but i do 

Iris: who’s the wisest woman you know? — mmmmmm i think i’m gonna have to go with my mom. + my science teacher from high school! love her so much

Lily of the Valley: what makes you happy? when’s the last time you felt happy? — love, in the simplest of ways. i felt happy this morning talking to the phone w one of my best friends for three hours, earlier today when someone told me i’m helping them accept their sexuality, last night eating pho w two friends and laughing about silly stuff or when another friend sent me a meme bc i inadvertently mocked his filmmaking skills and instead of getting pissed he turned it into an ongoing joke between us. it’s just moments but i feel happy when i’m just content w where i am, w people i love, forgetting my worries.

Pussy Willow: how do you feel about poetry? do you have a favorite poem or poet? — it can be beautiful but i’m not personally very much into it. i love giacomo leopardi and eugenio montale and clearly sappho and i love reading excerpts and being like wow... felt this. but like i don’t own poetry books nor read poetry, tbh. maybe i should tho! it’s never too late to get into it, i feel.

Rose: how do you define love/do you believe in love? have you ever been in love? — i do. i think i have but i also feel like... once you’re ‘out of it’ you wonder, was i really? maybe so. something i feel quite strongly about is that being in love can’t be a one way thing. like you can be infatuated or you can think you’re in love but you’re only truly in love when the person loves you back, bc love is a communion, is giving and taking and receiving and you have to feel stuff that the other person has to make you feel bc they’re in love w you too. this is so poorly said it’s shameful. however. when the other person stops ‘giving back’ you fall out of it and you wonder if it was love in the first place and i still don’t have an answer. something i know is that i’m ready to fall in love tho! claiming that shit 

Dahlia: how’s your mental health? — quite good, tbh. i have my days but overall i’d say i’m quite good. even really good, compared to how i’ve been. 

Poppy: what’s the last dream you had, or a dream that’s stuck with you for a long time? do you have any recurring dreams? — i have some places (an arcade which is in a cave, a cinema) that i have visited more than once in my dreams, over like more than a decade, sometimes they come back. i used to have a recurring dream about being in an elevator w no control of where it went – something that has to do with hysteria, i’ve learned – but i don’t anymore and i haven’t in quite a long time (see previous question about my mental health for reference haha). i’ve dreamed of my crush quite often recently so all of those kinda... stick with me haha. nothing too x-rated but still, sappy stuff 

Orchid: how do you show affection? how would you like affection shown to you? — depending on the person, in whichever way i know won’t make them ucomfortable. i tend to say i’m not a very physical person but i actually can be super cuddly if the context and / or the company allow. in general, i like to be warm, like i aim to be a warming presence, to listen and to make it clear that i’m truly there. i love having inside jokes, some touches that show you’re comfortable w each other. i love when people are so sure of our relationship that they make fun of me, like if it’s done w love i adore being poked and teased a bit, i find it so cute and it happens quite rarely! so the simple stuff, really. 

thank you again ♡♡♡♡ have the best day!