#ugh i'm still sick
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Aww hell nah
Chibi Hannibal or so I think so...
#the obsession never went away#its only getting worse day by day#i want someone to spam and scream into my ear to finish this or I'll likely abandon this like my other projects due to lack of motivation...#I'm still sick of them btw ugh#murder husbands#nbc hannibal#will graham#hannibal#hannigram#hannibal nbc fanart#hell yeah#avel's art
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VARGASTOBER - day 28 : fantasy
#vargas#edgar vargas#vargas zarla#scriabin#scriabin vargas#vargastober#zarla s#vargastober2024#vargastober 2024#sunny's art#late but this time i do have an actual excuse#GUESS WHO GOT SICK AGAIN .#if i had a dollar for every time i got sick on a vargastober . i'd have two dollars#and there have only been two vargastobers . i swear !!!!#i'm feeling way better now . aside from some considerably intense stomach pain .#. i will choose not to worry about it for now !#my everything hurts . i've had some weird days recently .#but well . i still have two pieces in mind .#i'll probably upload one of them after october is over but hey not like i can do anything else#i'll probably write an entry for this one !#i don't know if i should start the next piece or get the entry done . ugh#this next one could be pretty good if i get it right#bye i need to take a shower
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blade, superspeed superstar investigative extraordinaire (flinging entire men around since , uh, Saia)
#i love the way he casually GRABS eiden and yakumo and just launches into the sky#one-handed grab and go#doesn't even slow down. doesn't need to pause and readjust his stance or whatever#just straight up FULL SPEED (no change in trajectory) YOINKED#i know that rei said 'take us there' and blade immediately took off with yakumo#but doesn't that mean that eiden and rei have to follow on foot? behind them? at non-edroid speeds?#maybe blade was being considerate and only jumped rooftops at 1/3 his normal speed#so eiden and rei could keep up#also so yakumo could stay at least minimally coherent and not vomiting from motion sickness#no point in asking yakumo to lead them to the shop if the yakumo in question is passed out from shock#i joked to myself about blade's easy yoinking foreshadowing his grand final yoink moment with yakumo#but i'm gonna have to reread those scenes... i'm still not 90% clear on what happened#ugh wtf why are they all so cute. cloaca crew so dear to me. so silly. so . treasure#puzzling invitation#nu carnival blade#nu carnival yakumo#nu carnival rei#nu carnival eiden
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The Terror S1 Ep. 9 // Yellowjackets S2 Ep. 8 // "Famous Last Words (An Ode to Eaters)" by 1017 ALYX 9SM & Ethel Cain // "Strangers" by Ethel Cain
#when i saw that scene with james it reminded me immediately of lottie here :c#my two pookies always thinking of the good of their group before themselves ugh i'm gonna be sick actually#cannibalism as a motif#cannibalism as a metaphor for love#in this case i'd say is cannibalism as a way to surrender your own self for the well being of those you love#the fact both gave consent for this but their loved ones (be it crozier for james or the yellowjackets for lottie) decided against it#even if it consuming them could increase their chances of survival by a lot cause they just couldn't do that to james/lottie :c#anyways gonna go cry my heart out in a corner now my emotions are too raw still#ethel cain#famous last words (an ode to eaters)#strangers#james fitzjames#lottie matthews#the terror#yellowjackets#the terror amc#web weaving#edited cause i didn't like how the spotify lyrics looked still not sure if i like this one better but oh well#fave#my post ♡
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Please tell me I'm not the only one who screamed daddy when I first saw Obito's face reveal
#he is so daddy ugh#I am sick I am crazy for that bastard how dare you hide your face the whole time still love you btw...#if I'm the only one I am going to bury myself into a hole and we will never talk about this again#he even got Kakashi speechless and I am sure it's not only because of his identity#obito uchiha#obito
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sick rn and i'm over it. i don't wanna be in bed anymore i need to do my zoomies.
#i want my head to be clear and my body not to ache i need to run wild#i think it's the flu#it's wayyy better today than it was yesterday but STILL#me when i'm not sick: ugh i wish i was sick so i could get a break from everything#me when i am sick: horrendous. putrid. vile. done with this#live#illness tw#just in case? lemme know if u want smth else tagged <3
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oh my god. I'm watching The Librarians season 4 episode 6. and I. don't. like it.
#Jenkins! what the fuck! don't do that! I don't like it#my boy 😭#maybe I'll just. pretend nothing after like. early season 3 exists. that sounds like a good plan to me#I mean hey at least Flynn seems to be gone finally?? but still#ugh rude#just. let them run around having fun adventures man. none of that sad shit! I'm already sad!#and now Jenkins is SICK in the next episode?? NO. he is immortal. I am just going to pretend that he still is.#okay does he get hurt? does he die? if he dies someone has to tell me because I cannot watch that. 😭#the librarians
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bleh
#blabbering#rambling/whining/complaining/venting ahead:#I think the horrors have finally caught up to me and the depresso is starting to take hold#i don't usually experience this until winter but I think the sudden drop of activity and people going on hiatus and such -#has triggered this early for me#basically I can't be left alone with my thoughts for too long or i start spiraling REALLY badly.#i don't really handle change very well haha...#i have the notorious curse of second guessing anything and everything and putting it on repeat in my head and then amplifying it#which sucks bc I don't have any more escapisms that work now bc this was already my escapism and I have no human connections irl#(I'm not kidding either. I've failed time and time again to make friends irl and was always the proactive one about it. But alas... ugh)#my only source for connections is online bc i struggle to make friends (especially at my age and how my energy keeps depleting and depletin#might lowkey be sharkweek but usually I just get more agitated and not this (this is very specific to the winter horrors™ for me)#i guess I may as well check out the spears while they're around still (tho in between me making dinner). I'm just feeling super bummed out#and not excited like I was the other day about it (ofc I blame the depresso™).#I don't even know what to do for my beta characters. Head empty. Head gone. sigh.#also it sucks bc next week is gonna kick my ass at work (canada day/july 4th/july in general/5 DAYS and long shifts in there too)#i'm going to be so tired and so alone and with nothing to look forward to. Idk what to do bc none of my usual distractions are effective no#No escape. No seretonin. No company. Nothin'. I notice I when i start getting bad like this when I fall back hard into pokemon#(because it was my childhood escapism and I was a neglected only child who was left alone a lot; hence the connection lol)#i'll probably just have to suffer through it and be an absolute wreck of a person i think. I don't really have any other options#watch me get sick again bc canada sucks to work bc everyone has it off and they ALL GO TO THE STORE I WORK AT AND IT SUCKS.#gonna try to draw more too but the depresso is eating my brain worms (the healthy brain worms)
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I'm leaving for vacation in less than a week, and I told myself I'd finish first drafts of both these fics before then...
Hmm
Scrivener is taunting me
#it's either going to be a big old push in the next few days#(I mean...I'm staying home to avoid getting sick beforehand so maybe I'll have time?)#or I'm writing overseas baby!#(I could also wait & just not for the one that doesn't have a deadline other than a self-imposed one but you see...I want to)#(also starting to have ugh I hope people will still be reading bg3 fic in months' time thoughts—#but I know I will be and that's what matters/it's not a race/it's only been a year/it's fiiiine)
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Goddammit.
Look. I love modern medicine. It's great.
But can Albuterol please fucking not with the shakes. I am trying to figure out whether the whole mystery breathing issue is getting worse thank you and the anxiety-adjacent side effects are not helping knock it off.
#personal#this has already happened once#and the doc was all “okay your lungs sound better now; no crackling - you can stop the inhaler if you want”#a month later and moderate exercise still makes me need to sit down when previously I could run circles around “fit” people#time for my primary care doc; this shit ain't normal!#does he have any sort of in-person appointment anytime soon? course not but I'll take what I can get#“ok back to Albuterol and let's add a steroid cuz it sounds like you have inflammation as well”#note: there has been no x-ray and nobody has listened to my lungs in at least a month so I'm trying not to hear “this is a wild guess”#been on THOSE for a few weeks and I swear I'm getting worse and y'know what fuck it I'm taking a sick day tomorrow#for all I know I have Long COVID now fucking thank you society#venting#venting to the void#whatever#but UGH CAN SOMEONE PLEASE MAKE MY LUNGS DO THE OXYGEN THING. THIS BLOWS.
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ugh tomorrow I have to go to a meeting I've been dreading for a week
#it's about something big enough to need to be dealt with but still small enough that it p much feels like mountain/molehill time#not me but someone i supervise. i wouldn't be worried but a well-known temper is involved#i just reeeeeeeeeeeeeeally don't want to deal with hiring a replacement for next year if the dean lights that fuse#like. i'm sick of the drama with that temper. but dealing with a replacement hire would be way more work for me#ugh ugh ugh ugh UGH ugh ugh whatever. whatever! only way out is through
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🙄🫠
#yk when i said i'm back to being active on tumblr well yeah 😅#i had to write a seminar paper for uni and it hasn't been going well because i got sick and didn't get much done#well i got an extension luckily but it still was a struggle the topic was just rly difficult to write about#i'm almost done now at least some 300 words i still have to write and then proofread and work on better formulating but yay#i should get it done today but yeah i'll manage so i'll be back when i'm done the latest tmrw#but seminar papers are for real my least favorite part of uni 😅 it's so time consuming and can be a real struggle ugh#i rather write an exam lmao#but anyway i needed to rant ://#my money got stolen 🙃😫#sometimes life just throws some shit at you ugh#like having to write this paper and not having a social life anymore isn't enougj#i don't know how it happened? i mean i don't know for sure but i can't explain it another way#like the money was in my wallet the day before yesterday and yesterday the whole day i didn't use my wallet qnd then it was gone??#maybe while i was at uni football but that's crazy it was not some public place but in a school gym lockerroom??#or maybe someone stole it from my backpack on the street idk?? but i didn't notice#but that was money i got for my birthday from my dad and aunts 😪#and i wanted to buy something nice with it and ig i will anyway but it sucks :((#it was not a little no i had 150€ in my wallet 😭 at least my credit cards are still there ig#but i realize now how stupid that probably was to carry so much money with but i thought it was safe fr#like i have lived in austria all my life and this never happened to me 😫 and it was not like i was walking around with my wallet openly#i mean i will be fine it would be a lot worse if that happened to someone who is just barely getting by but i'm still upset#and my mom told me that apparently it happened to a friend of her as well when she was in my city but like i never heard that before...#from any of my friends ... or maybe it really is that more dangerous with thieves in my uni city but like i wasn't aware#bc i mean in general austria is like a very safe country comparatively and feels like it never was on my mind#maybe it's horrible bad luck but in the future I will be careful to carry any cash with me 🙃
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oof owie hello it’s chapter 17!
#dpxdc#danny phantom crossover#danny phantom#danny phantom fic#danny phantom batman#idk what to tag this with any more ugh#anyway here's chapter 17#you know when you're like... i'm fucking sick of looking at this here take it!!#that's where we're at with this chapter#hopefully the last chapter of the frantic 'let's add more chapters to this!!' bunch#still got way more to write tho aaahhh#also danny spends like 8 pages just being like 'nah i'm fine don't look at me i'm doing alright!! 👍'#while very obviously not fine#ugh there should have been more editing done on this and i'm SORRY#but i also really want to get to the next chapter because that's going to be fun!!!!#anyway i'm going to sleep#hope you all enjoy!!!!#thank you love you good night!!!! kisses you all on the forehead mwah#night!
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#tag talk#reasons I skedaddled from the relationship a a week after joining:#I only liked one out of two. I would have totally been friends with the one I liked. just not the other one. and you can't pick just one#the annoying one called sex “the horny” and I wanted to nope the hell out of there#I tried to build emotional distance by talking about how I was leaving at the end of the year and got told "#got told 'I'll still care about you even after you're gone' which like...#I react so so poorly to people who care so much they overstep my emotional boundaries#that's like. lowkey a trigger for me. I showed off my scars and they reacted with sympathy.#sympathy over my sick-ass scars that I'm proud of. I was like 'aren't these cool?' and they reacted with sympathy. no thanks#once again.. I like men. it was an experiment but I'm done. I wanted to see what it was like and I got my taste#they go on the list of people I've had sex with only once. because I usually do not go back for a second time with people#there was a chance I could have gotten one of them to play aoe with me that's the only potential benefit I could have gotten from them#otherwise nothing I wanted. they weren't good hiking pals. not good skating buddies. lame taste in movies.#the annoying one talked about wanting to be a sugar mommy which I should have seen as another un-vibe data point#cause I don't vibe with overly generous caring people either#tbh I'd rather be hated than simped over. I can't stand cloying overbearing kindness#people like that so often act as if their kindness entitles them to you and I just.. ugh. emotional blockages in place#it switched me back to L and now I'm he him pronouns again#and lowkey I think when we move I'm gonna cut our hair. I miss it short. we made a really cute guy.#being called miss and ma'am is fine and all but damn I miss being a cute boy#anyway. my life continues to be tumultuous and it's my own damn fault. I regret nothing but I will learn from this experience
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unexpectedly nice side effect of being sick (happy day 14 btw) is that I cough less when I talk lower, so I'm actually remembering to talk lower. I usually fall out of it back into my "girl voice" if I'm not paying attention, so this is good!
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THOS STYLE IS SO FUN FOR SIDE PROFILES WHAT
BADGE SELLER BADGE SELLER BADGE SELLER MWAH
#a hat in time#ahit badge seller#badge seller#a hat in time fanart#ahit fanart#the badge seller#Human au#Ugh so like#I'm still sick#Someone shoot me 😞#ITS BEEN A WEEK HELP#ovER A WEEK ALMOST#IM SUFFERING#my throat is killing me#Sigh#Anyways look at my handsome human#Hope nothing bad happens to them !!#Teehee!!#Their future will be so bright with absolutely no tragedy noooo nothing's going on 😋#I can't draw hair in this style it looks off 🤕
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