#u stumbled onto one of my big topics

[yesimwriting]

Do you think whether Louis shares this past family at all?

I imagine it’d hard to talk about Claudia being that he doesn’t really acknowledge vampirism, and it plays such a huge part with her whole stunned body, the broken laws, and the coven. Not to mention Claudia took pride in being vampire and was phenomenal at it.

Also, I think about the conflict with his late human family. Paul’s death was crazy af, and the blame he got for it. The whole Graces’s baby thing. Him watching his family mourning his death.

I know he had to tell Daniel in order for the book to happen, but how much could he possibly tell the reader?

OMG what if she could create a painting with Louis and late (actually dead, not undead) his loved ones, that he either didn’t have a lot of photos of or they were lost in time.

Ohhhh this is such a good question/ask 😭 I've been thinking through their dynamic in relation to this for such a long time.

The painting idea are you kidding me 😭. That's such a great idea and something she'd definitely do/try to piece together based on any remaining photos and Louis's description.

Okay so, onto what Louis has told her. Louis has definitely told her about everyone/everything at least once. He trusts bestie reader sm and he wants her to know that, and also they're together so much it'd be kind of hard for certain things to never come up.

However, Louis isn't consistent with the level of details he provides. Bestie reader knows more about Lestat and Louis's fights and the complexities of their relationship more than anyone else. He's told her things about Lestat he's never even mentioned to Armand. Some of this is intentional, but sometimes it's just bc they're both drunk (or on other substances) and he's thinking about it and she's serving as an outlet.

Also, because I'm a firm believer that no matter how separated Louis is from Lestat, he still loves him, he talks about Lestat a lot bc it's the closest he can get to reader meeting Lestat. In some ways, reader knowing Lestat is this fantasy Louis has that he's incapable of acknowledging, but I digress.

Anyways, back to Louis's inconsistency in detail. Some of what he leaves out is because of his memory and limited perspective (kind of like what we see in the show), and other things are left on purpose. He's so afraid of reader seeing him how he sees himself, so he'd never directly address how he failed Claudia. For example, he'd tell reader about how Claudia came to be and the age that she was turned and how hard it was for her, but he'd never talk about all the ways that he made her existence harder.

Claudia is also a difficult topic for him to discuss with reader because while he doesn't see reader as Claudia, he sometimes sees a little bit of Claudia in her. Sometimes when they're really happy, Louis remembers the early years when things still seemed like they could work out. When reader wants to do things that make him nervous, he sees the ways in which he could have tried harder to keep Claudia safe. When the reader is happy and in her element (like at an art gallery), he sees what Claudia might have been.

He censors himself the most when talking about Armand. Partially because of how controlling Armand is, but also because of reader and Armand's dynamic. Armand's behavior around bestie reader is visibly different, he's more restrained, almost gentle. If Louis were to tell reader about some of the things Armand has done, she'd start seeing Armand as a monster, and Armand wouldn't feel the need to play nice anymore bc her mental image of him is already ruined.

Louis is not risking reader's safety and peace to tell her about things like Armand's torture era in the 70's.

Also, Louis isn't planning on leaving Armand so it's kind of like when the person your dating has seriously wronged you but you can't tell your friends bc then they'd hate them too much. AND reader would probably try to slap Armand or something if she knew everything, and Louis doesn't think Armand's patience with her will extend that far.

I think Louis is very back and forth on mentioning his family to bestie reader. Stories about them are, by far, the least dangerous, but they also make him think about things in certain ways. Sometimes it's weirdly healing to be able to tell her about the way that his family viewed him and other times it's nauseating.

I think he'd talk about Paul's absence the most, but he wouldn't delve into the details of what happened if that makes sense. Like he talks about his feelings over Paul's death, but he divides his emotions from the chain of events that caused them. Tbh that's how he handles most discussions of grief.

Okay, some new bestie reader lore that you have no way of knowing about because I haven't written it into existence yet that's super relevant to this question, but part of the reason that reader lets Louis get away with being relatively 'cagey' about certain aspects of his grief is bc she's doing the same thing.

Not to drop crazy lore here, but in my head, bestie reader lost someone important to her a little before she met Louis. In some ways, she feels similarly to what Louis feels, in the sense that sometimes she's scared that she's replacing the person she lost with Louis. However, her grief is much more plain sadness than actual guilt, and so she assumes that Louis doesn't want to talk about certain things because it's hard and not bc of vampire self hatred/guilt.

Louis also knows that there's someone reader isn't talking about enough because he pays attention to how she acts, but also because he can see into her thoughts. I do think he works hard at actively giving her mental privacy, but at times he gets really worried or her thoughts are particularly loud bc she's distracted or overwhelmed and he hears things.

So basically, to an extent, they're living in a mutual denial. I have an idea for a drabble/fic where this is forced to end and they talk about a lot of things, and if you'd be interested in that pls lmk!

Also, slightly off topic, but a big part of the reason he keeps anything from reader is rooted in a subconscious self hatred. Bestie reader is going to get Louis to love himself or die trying, and I'm so serious. As the story progresses, bestie reader is going to lock in and get Louis to feel less guilty about what he is.

He's actually so delusional, so convinced that any blunt conversation about vampirism could be the thing that pushes reader away. In reality, reader does not gaf about him being a vampire. She is generally curious about vampires, but she thinks everything about Louis is so much more interesting.

That's her Louis, and if she walked in on him actively draining seven people at once she'd just be like 'sometimes I need a late night snack too'. She'd actually become a vampire activist if it meant Louis would feel better about himself.

[izzy-b-hands]

I know music aus are overdone for Ed and Izzy and their crew pre-Stede (or at least that particular au is pretty well saturated for both pre and with Stede) but

(very rambly au talking below the cut involving a fic draft I'm working on rn. I attempted to make this slightly easier to parse by italicising my Additional Thoughts and putting them into their own paragraphs and brackets but. There's a lotta love for this au and it's late so this is messy, bear with me while I babble excitedly.)

I'm really loving dipping back into the one I started for AU-gust and adding onto it with other bands. Like, I'm finally writing this one particular Dethklok/Queen Anne's Revenge

(placeholder band name for Ed, Izzy, Fang, and Ivan bc it does fuck as a band name in a weird way since I see them being like. purposefully subversive with it? in terms of lyrics/things sung about/album artwork/etc. Like, y'all remember the chants at football games when the queen died last year or whenever that happened I don't remember and fuck looking it up bc. I don't give a fuck abt the royals lmao? Lizzie's in box? that's the vibe for anything for them when they get political, v punk and fuck the state which is entirely too reductive for how much More I have in ideas for this sphere of things for them but that's not what this post was meant to be about so i finally digress-)

idea wherein they play a show with Dethklok, specifically water-themed. All the water/ocean/mermaid/pirates/etc things like that songs that both bands have are on the setlist, and. And. Dethklok, as the hosting band

(aka Charles needed to clean things up and distract from the latest spate of accidental concert deaths, and QAR's current management in the form of one shithead extraordinaire Ben Hornigold doesn't give two fucks about what he signs them up for as long as he gets the biggest cut out of it, so he doesn't even appreciate that like. the world's most famous band and their manager approached them, an also v famous but not as famous considering this is now an AU where Queen, Dethklok, QAR, and other musicians/bands are all hobknobbing far more than they ever might irl thing, band. Without any reason. Just chose them at random. If u thought Ben was bad in canon I'm somehow making him even more insufferable and shit in this au, he's just Bad At His Job but stumbles into success on Ed, Izzy, Fang, and Ivan's talents. Whatever, off topic AGAIN but I just have so much I love and wanna talk about with this au-)

Set up a new sort of pit/stage design. The operating idea is a clear, aquarium like tank or pool, where the fans can float and headbang away, all while feeling like fishes themselves! It's very clever, you see, and definitely won't result in anyone drowning when it turns into a mosh tsunami

(spoiler alert: it is clever, but not really, and so many people are gonna drown. Luckily, in this fic Metalocalypse logic applies bc only Dethklok and QAR are involved, so they can bask in that universe's ability to kill people constantly as part of Dethklok's Whole Thing without it being a big deal, though this is from Izzy's POV and a big part of it is him realising that and coming to terms with it as they play through people just. Literally headbanging hard enough into violently sloshing water to drown themselves, with a smile on their face because they got to see Dethklok, finally.)

Also Murderface is the opener as one-man Planet Piss and it goes so poorly for him and Izzy and Ed are just. So mildly grossed out by how it goes down and sweetly concerned. Someone get that kid some therapy, a hug, and please tell him to stop pissing on the crowd as part of his Planet Piss act (He will not.)

My working setlist thus far because of course I've got the fucking setlist (though since QAR doesn't...actually exist, I'm just giving them songs by other rock/metal/grunge/punk acts I like that have songs with fitting themes/lyrics for this show. As such D=Dethklok song, QAR/(insert name of band that actually plays the song irl) on these):

1.Murmaider-D

2. Murmaider II-D

3. Murmaider III-D

4. A History of Bad Men-QAR/Melvins (not exactly on theme, but it's peak early canon edizzy vibes for me, so in this au it's just like. one of their always played songs, every show, no matter what.)

5. Flying Whales-QAR/Gojira

6. Black Waters-QAR/Avatar

7. Go Into the Water-D

8. Capsized-QAR/Kyuss (an instrumental to try and uh. give the Klokateers time to get a big fucking net and get out the already dead audience members. Keep the vibes going but not make it too weird with the...everything, going on lmao)

9. unsure yet bc it needs to bring the energy back without it being Weird, and that's a delicate balance...so probably something else by Brendan Small. I'll eventually post this playlist, probably, but for now. In progress just for this fic special little playlist listing.

[keilemlucent]

best nest

(r18+)

hawks | takami keigo x reader

ao3

word count: 6.2k

Keigo's never been able to properly indulge his instincts, though you're more than willing to help him change that.

warnings: avian, feral keigo. rut/heat cycles. nesting. wing kink. breeding. horny shit, i tell u what

beta’ed: @keiqos​ 

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wow :’^) this is a collab with the wuv, @keiqos​!! we each worked on a fic that was our own take of keigo during his rut, and now y’all get the fun results. here is hers!!! enjoy this feast!!!

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Keigo had been acting particularly weird for the past few weeks. 

He was hardly a skittish person, yet he had been avoidant and downright shy in the last month or so. Despite living together, you had hardly seen or heard from him, and when you tried to address his absence, Keigo continually brushed you off.

He was hardly meeting your eyes when you managed to be in the apartment at the same time.

Finally, one night, he came in late. You sat, waiting on the couch, very awake circa three in the morning.

His eyes went wide, knowing he was caught.

“I know it’s late, but can we talk?” You asked softly, patting the couch next to you.

Keigo nodded stiffly, wings folded timidly against his back as he sat. In his big, tough hero uniform, he looked so odd with his hands held so nervously. 

“What’s going on, love?” You spoke quietly, lowering the volume of the TV to a hum. “Talk to me.”

Keigo silently picked at the threading of his gloves, then pulled off his visor. He stayed silent, eyes wide and far off.

You sighed, bringing your knees up under your body to face him. You tried to sound strong, but there was a twinge of weakness in your voice, “Are you... seeing other people?”

That notion brought Keigo right back, head snapping up to meet your own before gripping the sides of your face (harder than you would’ve expected) and rapidly shaking his head.

“No, no, no, not at all,” Keigo scooted closer to you as he spoke. “I promise, not that.”

“Then what?” You were frowning, despite Keigo’s contact feeling aloe on a burn.

Once again, Keigo seemed to stumble. His eyes averted, going glassy.

“It’s embarrassing,” His hands slip from your face, back into his lap. “Very embarrassing.”

You raised an eyebrow.

Keigo Takami was many things. But, shy and passive were not in that repertoire. 

You deadpanned.

“Please, just tell me,” You huffed at him, crossing your arms. “You’ve been avoiding me for weeks, Kei’. Feels weird.”

“I know, it’s just— fuck.” His gloved hands dragged down his face, flushing a bright red. 

You figured he was a bit warm.

Carefully, you reached forward, going to pull them from his hands. He stiffened harshly, watching you with... slitted eyes— (had they always been like that?). You gingerly freed Keigo’s fingers and palms, intertwining your own. 

“You can tell me, Keigo,” You smiled at him, squeezing and feeling pricks of pain in the flesh of your own hands. 

You noticed then, that Keigo’s fingernails were longer, pointed even. Though, they didn’t look manicured. They seemed to grow darker at the cuticle.

Your eyes widened as you looked up at Keigo as he turned his head away, half hiding his face in the fluffy collar of his jacket. 

“You know how I go on a ‘business trip’ about this time every year?” Keigo asked, rubbing a clawed thumb over the back of your hands. 

You nodded, “You go on lots of business trips, Kei’. What’s different about this spring one?” 

Keigo shifted his legs, wings twitching at his back. His entire form emanated his uncomfortable energy. From the tension rolling off his shoulders to the way he clenched and unclenched his jaw, Keigo was visibly very anxious. 

“Okay, uh, how do I explain this—” Keigo dropped his head, then looked back up at you, blinking slitted pupils at you. “You know how I’ve got wings?”

“Duh, dummy,” You rolled your eyes, reaching out to brush some fingers over one of the large, external feathers. 

Oh, but you got a reaction you weren’t expecting. You hadn’t thought anything of your action, yet Keigo audibly moaned with the contact. Something loud, high, and sinful as his thighs clenched together.

Both of your eyes went wide. 

“So,” You began slowly, “You have wings.”

“I have wings,” Keigo’s voice sounded tense and held in his throat, shaking just a bit. “And, I have some other avian traits as well.”

“Like...?” You coaxed. Whatever it was must’ve really made Keigo uncomfortable if he was being this resistant to talking about it. This man was the number two hero, yet he was mincing about like a kitten. 

“Uhhh... They’re more behavioral. Some physical,” Keigo bit his lip, shaking his head. “What do birds do in the spring?”

“Is this a riddle?”

“No, straightforward question.”

You really thought he was pulling your leg, but based on Keigo’s words and grave expression, he was dead serious.

And you had a dead serious answer.

“Oh my god, Keigo, you migrate?!” Your mouth fell open. Keigo’s eyes went wide and he seemed to stifle a laugh before shaking his head, feathers ruffling. 

“No, oh my God, no,” Keigo carried some mirth in his gaze now. “Not at all.”

You rolled your eyes, laughing with him. The tension seemed to be somewhat out of his shoulders until you set a hand on his knee and squeezed. 

“Keigo, out with it,” You rolled your eyes. “I know it’s scary, but I promise, no matter what it is, I’m here for you okay?”

You let your eyes soften as you sighed, squeezing his hands. 

Keigo looked you dead in the face, “We fuck, (Y/N).”

You choked on your own spit, before leaning back with a small laugh, “I know it’s been a minute with your schedule, but we do indeed do that outside of spring.”

“No, no, not like that,” Keigo ran his hands down his face, shaking his head. “I’ve been avoiding you because this whole conversation is going to be weird and embarrassing. You up for it? Because it only gets weirder.”

“Lay it on me, tailfeathers,” You rubbed your thumb over his knuckles. 

Keigo took a hand to sheepishly rub the back of his neck, “One of my more... avian traits is this... I don’t know, the Commission called it a ‘rut’, but I’ve done my own research and I’m not sure if that fully encompasses all of what it is.”

You weren’t entirely unfamiliar with the concept, but you certainly weren’t an expert.

“What happens during it?” 

“Uh, to be frank, exactly what happens during a bird’s mating season, and then some.” Keigo’s long nails dug into the fabric of his cargo pants. “My feathers grow in a bit differently. I nest. I get weird and territorial, possessive. I cannot tell you how much I’ve wanted to leave your neck covered in bite marks, just fucking claiming you—”

You both swallowed.

“And... You’re insatiably horny on top of all of this?” You asked, trying to ignore the way your insides were heating up.

Keigo nodded, waiting for you to reply with a softened, gooey gaze.

Oh, this was a little weird, right? Keigo was avian in some ways, but you never thought he had a whole ass mating season-

“Wait, so, in the spring, the ‘business trips’,” You used air quotes with a frown. “You’ve been just disappearing for your ‘rut’ and then coming back? Alone?”

Keigo waved his hands between the two of you, feathers fluffing up defensively behind him, “No, n-no, not like that. Never once. I’d just hole up in my apartment and fuck my hand like it was God.”

You choked. 

It made sense, you and Keigo moved in together at the end of last spring. Looking back, the timing now seemed to be intentional. 

“When did it start?” You asked, getting semi-intrigued by Keigo’s odd biology. 

“I was sixteen, I think,” Keigo did the mental math and bit his lip. “The Commission didn’t really know what to do with me, so they would just lock me up in my room with two extra blankets and call it good.”

You choked again. 

“So, you just disappear, deal with it, then come back?” You frown. “Keigo, I would’ve helped if I would’ve known.”

“I don’t know, (Y/N), it’s a lot to ask,” Keigo’s nails bit into his wrists as he squeezed. “I’m basically a horny, possessive, feral birdman for two weeks, not too mention the time leading up to it. That’s why I’ve been all distance. I’m sorry, I should’ve at least told you.”

“I would have appreciated it if you had, but I understand,” You grabbed Keigo’s hand again and squeezed. “This doesn’t exactly sound like a thing you’ve really ever been able to deal with comfortably, huh?”

“N-not really,” Keigo got all sheepish again, scooting a bit closer to you. “I haven’t really known what to do about it this year, so I’ve just been putting off facing you. I was just gonna get a hotel room or something, run off for two weeks, and then come back.” 

“Another ‘business trip’?” You raised an eyebrow as Keigo looked down, all sheepish and blushy. You tutted, shaking your head. “Well, babe, not this time. I’ve got you. I’m your live-in partner and I will not let my sweet, bird boy handle horny hours alone. I haven’t made you before, right?”

That made Keigo laugh, softly, some of the stress being held still in his wings falling away.

“I appreciate that, angel, but I don’t want you to agree to do this until you fully understand it,” He beamed you a smile. God, the man was like sunshine and candy when he chose to be. 

You nodded, giving him a(n) (over)confident smile, “Lay it on me, babe.”

Keigo had amassed quite a detailed understanding of his biological clock over the years, and he was able to spit it all back onto you.

“It’s basically two weeks of time where my only thoughts are ‘nest’, ’fuck’,’protect’, ’breed’—” Keigo cut himself off when your eyes went wide. 

“Wait, like, have children?” You asked, gut feeling unsettled. 

You and Keigo had been dating for a while, but the topic of children had never been seriously brought up. 

Does helping him mean to commit to having kids?

“No, not exactly. Like, I’m trying to protect a mate and breed, but that doesn’t mean the outcome needs to be children. At all,” Keigo assured you, patting your knee. “I know, it’s weird. I definitely am not into getting you pregnant, but that instinct part of my brain is.”

“Well, I’m on birth control, so we should be good there, right?” You laughed, relieved, squeezing his hand. “What do you mean by nesting?”

 “A literal nest. A spot that just smells like me and you to keep—” Keigo clicked his tongue, sighing in what seemed like relaxation, “you safe. And mine. It usually ends up being just like... my entire apartment, lots of shredded pillows, feathers, blankets. It’s honestly a nightmare.”

A nightmare, yes, but a very necessary one.

So, a plan was made. 

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 Keigo sent you off to a hotel for the days leading up to his rut. He had to prepare, get things ready and he wanted to be careful not to trigger it earlier and risk ruining what would more than likely be his first proper rut. 

You took his lead, pampering yourself for a few days and letting Keigo handle the details. 

(Considering how wrecked your body was going to be in the coming weeks, it was more than smart to give yourself some time to rest.)

When Keigo called you to tell you he was ready, he was sounded elated, wings audibly flapping into the receiver. 

When you arrived back at the apartment, the ride up the glass elevator was daunting.

You were perfectly happy to help with Keigo’s rut, but you were a bit nervous about what he was going to be like. Though he reminded you that one of his hormonal brain’s functions was to ‘keep you safe’, it also sounded like he was going to be a bit out of his mind. You trusted him with your life, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t nerve-wracking. 

The elevator dinged, sliding open to the top floor. 

Keigo stood just outside. 

You couldn’t help jumping back in surprise, taking in Keigo’s... state.

He looked positively feral, just on sight. Though had been warned of this, you hadn’t fully expected how visible his state would be.

Keigo apparently decided to forgo any sort of a top today as his chest was entirely bare to you. A pair of grey sweats was slung low on his hips, likely put on in a rush based on the uneven settling of the waistband. This was not even to mention the very obvious imprint of his dick against the fabric, hard just from seeing you. He was covered in a fine sheen of sweat, skin pink with rushing blood.

“Angel,” Keigo purred, yanking you from the elevator and crushing you into his chest, smothering you with kisses. Stray feathers flew to pick up your bags, carting them off to your nearby apartment. 

Speaking of wings—

In the few days it had been since you’d seen Keigo, his feathers had almost entirely changed. They were still their usual bright crimson, but the filaments of the plumage seemed to be almost... shiny? You couldn’t quite place it, but there had been some sort of change in their anatomy that made his wings appear iridescent when they moved. The patterns almost seemed to swirl and streak through the plumage. You wanted nothing more than to admire them.

Without thinking (or responding to Keigo, mistake), you reached out to grab one of the feathers, “Oh wow, Keigo, they’re so pretty.”

The moment you wrapped your hand fully around the plume, Keigo clawed his... talons (?!) into your shoulders, shuddered, and screamed.

You hissed as pain radiated from your shoulders, but managed to hold both you and Keigo upright as he twitched against you.

“Fuck,” He cursed against your neck, panting.

You felt a vague, wet spot on your leg.

You blanched.

“Did... you just cum? From me touching your wings?” 

Keigo nodded against, still shaking.

“S-sorry...”

The shame in his tone made your frown, pulling away from him to press a harsh kiss against his half-parted lips.

“Nope,” You murmured against his lips. “Nu-uh, you have nothing to be sorry about. I’m here to help, dummy.”

He sighed in relief, pressing into you.

It was going to be an interesting two weeks.

...

 The apartment was a nightmare. Keigo really hadn’t been lying when he told about how extreme nesting was. 

Notably, nothing was dirty. Keigo was actually an immaculately clean person due to his time with the Commission, but he was disorganized. And the nest of an apartment was testament to that.

There were stray feathers everywhere. Stuck in cupboards, tucked behind the TV, wedged in pillowcases and blankets, even a few under the bathroom sink. Newly purchased blankets and pillows were strewn over every surface. It appeared like you could simply fall in any area of the house and be entirely cushioned. Not to mention that Keigo’s feathers could sense every single motion in the house.

It was a sweet gesture and testament to the protective element of the rut that Keigo described. 

In addition to the many layers of softness, a new, far larger mattress had even been dragged to the living room and placed on top of a high frame set against the wall of windows that overlooked the city. It was heaped with pillows, fluffy blankets, and downy-looking, glimmering feathers. All of, despite its inherent chaos, was the comfiest looking corner of the apartment. 

“Oh, wow, ‘Kei,” You breathed, running a hand along a soft-looking blanket over the back of a chair. “You did such a good job!”

With that, he was pressed against you from behind.

“I... I did? You like it?” Keigo never asked for validation so openly. The implication of his inherent fear around his rut continued to make your heart ache. From what he had told you (and what you read in the days prior about avian behavior), you needed to ‘accept’ the nest he made for the two of you. 

I’ll make this good for him. 

“Yes, so much.” You leaned back against his chest, loving the way the heat of his bare chest seeped so well through your clothes, “I can’t wait to snuggle up with you in it and so much more.” 

Your last word was more than enough to get Keigo chirping into your ear.

Yes, bird-ishly chirping.

It was a mix of high and low clicks, maybe a bit of cooing thrown in as well. As far as his avian adaptations went, this one was newer to you, but remarkably cute. You turned around, pressing a kiss to his neck without thinking.

The contact made Keigo’s aforementioned talons dig into the meat of your hips, a hot breath rolling over your ear, “Please let me fuck you.”

It was abrupt, his shift in tone, but based on the way his cock was nearly burning your backside, it was a necessary step. 

“Well, I certainly won’t stop you,” You didn’t realize the unintended weight of your words, but Keigo sure as fuck did. 

He roughly grabbed your wrist, dragging you across the room to the mattress in the corner.

“W-wait, not the bedroom?” You asked. Keigo pressed at your shoulders, pushing you down roughly, though the softness of the bed dressings insulated your fall. 

“Nope, here, best spot,” Keigo’s words were clipped as he straddled your waist, silencing any other words you might have with a soul-sucking kiss. His tongue wormed its way into your mouth, licking at your gums and receding to suck at your tongue. All the while, you could hear and feel his feathers shudder.

He pulled away, eyes half-lidded and vertical pupils blown wide. 

“You have no fucking idea how much I missed you.” Keigo’s teeth nipped at your pulse point. 

Were... his teeth sharper?

You craned your neck away from him, pulling a nasty growl from his chest. You watched his feathers, both the one’s still fixed to his back and flared upwards and those scattered around, shudder and writhe. 

Keigo’s canines were longer, maybe even a little sharper. 

This rut thing... it was an avian thing, right?

Birds... don’t have sharp teeth... Do they?

 You dismissed it, much more focused on Keigo’s hand as it slipped lower, futzing with the waistband of your pants. 

“Sorry, dove, I’m a little impatient,” His voice was rough and strained, like he was holding back. 

His normally nimble hands struggled with the button of your fly, and with a nasty growl, he snatched up one of his nearby feathers, hardening it in an instant, and slicing your pants off.

“Keigo!” You shrieked, squirming, and sitting up as he tore off the ruined garment. “I liked those! That wasn’t nice.”

 “I think I’m done being nice to you for a bit, dove.” He shot you a dark look. 

You blinked at him.

Keigo had warned you that he would be a bit feral... but you weren’t expecting his nasty attitude. 

You also weren’t expecting to be turned on by the rage-filled spikes in his words. 

“Get on your hands and knees.” Keigo’s voice was clipped as he slipped off his sweats.

Holy.

Fuck.

Keigo’s cock was nothing to fucking sneeze at. It was pretty, long, with nice girth and a perfect curve for your pussy. He tended to keep his body hair well kept and groomed, an old remnant of the militancy of his youth. 

Oh, but ‘fuck you until you’re pregnant’ Keigo? 

His dick was a bit bigger, engorged with what had to be painful blood flow. Heavy balls hung below, ripe and flushed, in desperate need of contact, let alone release. Maybe it was the ambiance (or, the smell and pheromones unknowingly being inhaled into your endocrine system), but his dick looked immaculate. 

“Is your dick bigger, babe?” You asked, half-drooling in your mind at your lover’s cock. It certainly wasn’t hard to. 

Keigo normally would’ve clawed at the opportunity to schmooze you for stroking his ego so directly, but your current version of Keigo was far less into flattery.

“I said, get on your hands and knees.” He didn’t wait for you to reply, just flipped you onto your stomach, straddling your upper thighs. You yelped at the shock of sheets hitting your front, fabric tearing behind you as Keigo made quick work of your shirt.

You gulped as Keigo’s hands, talons, raked their way down your bare back as he let loose a loud, quaking sigh, “Oh, Angel, holy fuck.”

He said the pet name like it was a prayer to God and you let him. 

You shivered under him as his nails drew lines up your neck, all the way into your scalp. Without warning, he pressed the heel of his hand into the curve of your skull, shoving you deeper into the plushness of the nest below you.

Oh... Fuck. Were you about to sloppy fuck in the sheets you’d be spending the next several weeks in?

(Yes.)

 The somewhat gross revelation was quickly forgotten as Keigo’s hot breath shuddered against your ear, his (oh my fucking god slightly pointed?) tongue curled along the soft skin of your pulse point.

You both choked down a moan as his exposed cock rubbed against your backside.

“You’re so pretty like this,” For being feral, and for the blood that was quickly rushing to your head and sex, Keigo sounded very nice. “Gonna look so cute with my cock inside you, right?”

You nodded into the sheets, struggling to raise yourself up on your elbows as Keigo hauled your hips up.

Stabilizing yourself on the softness of the sheets and feathers was much more difficult than one would think. You were already slipping, no matter how you tried to hold yourself up.

“I can’t begin to tell you how much I want to fill you up, right now,” His voice takes on a dreamy lilt as he shoves you back, further into the nest. You crawl on your hands and knees, succumbing to Keigo’s hand on your neck after arriving to the middle of the massive mattress. “But, I also really don’t wanna hurt my angel. Gotta make sure you’re good and ready.”

The sentiment was nice enough, but you stiffened, remembering that Keigo’s nails were not only sharpened, but slightly hooked. You tried to turn, but quickly stop when you felt Keigo’s hot, hot breath over your sex.

You shuddered, biting your lip as his pointed tongue ran up and down your slit. From his hold on the meat of your thighs, you could tell he was trembling and burning. Whether it was from how much he needed you or how much he was holding himself back, you couldn’t be sure. 

Keigo’s pointed tongue ran up between the lips of your cunt, both of you moaning at the sensation. You felt his wings raise behind the two of you, casting shadows down on your display in some weird show of dominance. 

It made your skin run hot.

What made it run even hotter was the jolt you received Keigo pressed his face into your cunt with absolute zero shame. 

His tongue slicked up the lips of your pussy, dipping around your opening with absolutely sinful sounds falling around the two of you.

When you tried to adjust your arms, you caught a quick slap to your ass, pain only pushing your eyes to roll back in your head as Keigo sneered against you.

“Greedy.” It was a rich line, coming from him, king of gluttony, but you weren’t about to argue with him.

His nails dug into your thighs, dragging your cunt and his face together to the point where it felt like there was no space between them. You were helpless to do much other than grind back on his tongue as he tongue-fucked your cunt.

Keigo drew away, grabbing you by the hips and spinning you. Your back hit the nest, eyes spinning as you weren’t so used to him outright manhandling you. You sucked in a breath as you stared up at Keigo, his face slick with your juices and enlarged wings spread out and upwards. 

The slits of his eyes were blown wide, a toothy smile beaming down at you. It seemed sort of sweet before two of his clawed-fingers (thankfully, somewhat gingerly) spread the lips of your cunt. He spat onto your exposed clit, no reverie in his actions as his avian glare slipped over you.

A harsh clicking came from the back of his throat, feathers fluttering.

“B-Babe? Are you okay?” You asked as Keigo refused to look away from your splayed-out body.

“More than okay,” He shuddered, looking a bit more grounded for a moment. He swallowed, shaking his head.

Surprisingly, he reached out to cup the side of your face, rubbing a thumb over your cheek, “If you want me to stop, can you tell me now?”

“I don’t want to, Kei’,” You laid your words on thickly, knowing you had his lucidity. “Can you please fuck me? Fill me up, Kei’.”

He growled, something from deep in his chest, nodding, feathers shimmering in the light of the room.

He was on you instantly, wings flapping to shove his body into yours, lips on yours and tongue pressing into your mouth. The tapered appendage licks and literally fucks your mouth, robbing you of air as you weave your hands into his sweaty tresses and pull.

The pain spurred him on, one of his hands sloppily going between the two of you to line his fat cock with your cunt. He was considerate enough to rub circles on your clit as he rammed into your insides in one single motion.

Your eyes went wide, snapping open and you tug the bite of your nails into the back of Keigo’s head, held by the burning stretch and pleasant ache of your insides. 

Keigo had been fairly quiet during this entire ordeal, an odd thing considering he normally ran his mouth dry with praises, filth, and sweet nothings when he was half this close to your cunt. Yet, he’d hardly spoken through most of it, and most of your reading of him had been based on body (and wing language).

But, when he did finally bottom out, shaking and straining, it clicked.

Based on the sweat that was rolling down his temples, the veins bulging in his forearms, and the rigid tension in his shoulders, he was holding his rut-crazed body back.

You frowned, trying to ignore the kiss of his cock head against your cervix.

Recalling some of the things Keigo told you about some of his more animalistic desires, you decided to egg him on to breaking. Based on the rapid twitching of his wings, he needed it.

Keigo just barely moved, biting his lip and harshly exhaling.

“Baby,” Your own voice broke as you spoke, falling back into his mutant desires as well. “Please, please, fuck me how you need. Please.”

“S’fine, this is enough,” Keigo gritted out as he dragged his cock almost entirely out of your dripping cunt.

To emphasize your need, you grabbed a fistful of his feathers at the base of his wings and tugged, making sure to press your nails to the bone.

Keigo threw his head back, moaning high into the air, a coo mixing with the sound as his wings shuddered in your grip.

You buckled down. 

“No,” You whined, hooking your legs behind the small of his back, thumbing at the plumage as he writhed from your touch. “Fuck me, like you mean it, Keigo. Fill me up.”

He paused, freezing, eyes darting up to your own.

“S-say that again.”

You grinned, dragging his stiff neck down to your mouth, dragging your tongue to his ear, “I said I want you to fill me up. Stuff me full of your cum and breed me so good, please, Kei’.”

You’d never spoken like that to him during sex, and you quickly understood why.

The moment the words left your lips, Keigo slammed his hips back into you, wings fanning out as wide as they could. 

His lips found your neck, cock rearranging your insides with the immediate force and pace of his thrusts. His hands grappled at your hips, your tits, your shoulders, and your legs, anything to get to ram himself into you. Each thrust was punctuated by growls and clicks from the back of his throat, filthy words finally fell from his lips without a trace of shame.

“Oh, baby, I’m gonna breed you so good,” Keigo’s voice was breathy as he raked his nails down your neck, light lines following as he bottomed out in you once more. He roughly grabbed one of your tits, pinching your pebbled nipple. “Gonna make you gush for me, yeah, I am.”

You could’ve given an equally horny response, but Keigo’s tongue was quickly in your throat, groaning into your mouth as his pace picked up to something inhumane.

It was short-lived, the wet slapping of his heavy balls stalling as he damn near screamed into your mouth, coming deep in your throbbing cunt.

You shuddered, feeling his load already dripping from your cunt onto the sticky sheets below you.

Keigo’s lips parted from yours, half-lidded eyes looking glazed and dreamy.

You thought that nutting twice so closely together would slow him down, but you were remarkably wrong. 

You rolled your hips up, smiling, “Feeling okay, Kei’?”

Keigo blinked down at you, lowering his head to nose at your jaw. You tilted your head for him, spine curling when you felt him begin to move again, still fully hard.

“I’m not done yet.” His words were curt and sharp as his arms caged around your head. The sharp peaks of his canines caught on the skin of your neck, dragging and sucking. “Gotta make sure you’re fucked nice and good with my brood, dove. So good.”

You swallowed, eyes rolling back when Keigo bit down at the base of your neck.

Keigo’s hips slammed back into yours, his pace picking up and the squelching of your slick and his cum ringing around the room. You could hardly focus on it, or anything as he quickly threw your legs over his shoulders, moving his licks and bites to your calves and thighs.

Your clit throbbed with each thrust, wet and craving contact. When you reached down to play with yourself, Keigo swatted your hand away with a growl, a red feather from the bed replacing it. The small, soft crimson feathers lapped at your clit, making quick circles as it became wet with slick. 

With the hold on your legs, he hauled you upwards, your lower half lifted off the bed and held by only Keigo’s grip and the curve of your spine. You keened with each of his thrusts, listening to the wild words that spilled from his lips while he rammed your cunt raw. 

They were mostly incoherent, half-sentences about how he was going to ‘breed you until he’s shooting blanks’, ‘fuck you full with his brood’ and ‘reem you until you grew feathers’. Each phrase got your breath going fast, his grip and pace forcing your lungs to fill faster and faster. 

The feather against your cunt grew sloppier, nearly vibrating with its jerky movement. A well-timed swat to your clit by Keigo’s own hand while he talked about your ‘life-giving pussy’ was what sent you over the edge, cunt tightening around his cock. 

His words reached peak incoherency as he rammed into your cervix, spilling into you with a harsh wail, wings stretching upwards and bumping against the ceiling. 

You expected a moment of reprieve, but before you could even think, still spinning with your own orgasm, Keigo flipped you onto your tummy once more.

Despite signing up for this sort of treatment, your insides already ached. The friction of Keigo’s fat cock had stretched you perfectly, all for him, but the deep ache in your core was getting a bit distracting. This was not even mentioning how sore your muscles were getting, pulling from the pacing and positioning Keigo chose at whim.

You didn’t voice your pains, buckling down on your psyche (or, what you had left of it), as Keigo slid into you once more.

“Oh baby,” His voice was slippery as he wound his hands through your hair, pulling and forcing your back into a severe arch. “You feel that?”

He fucked into you harshly, the squelch that followed serving as a reminder of how he’d already more than filled you up.

“So pretty and round with my seed...” Keigo’s words got dreamy and slow, just for a moment as he smoothed his hand over your hips, “Just need to make sure it takes...”

The feather from earlier was back on you as he started up once more, babbling and flapping his massive wings as he fucked you numb. 

You came as he did the next time, your legs giving way under the pressure and sensation. Keigo was quick to tsk, two more of his feathers moving to hold you up as he started to move again, cock never leaving your spent cunt. 

The parts of your brain that were still working and not reduced to a pile of mush wondered how the fuck he was still hard, but all things considered, it shouldn’t have been surprising. Besides, he deserved to satiate himself properly, fucking your gushing cunt, considering he’d never gotten to indulge in his instincts like this before. 

Despite how you burned all over, you let him finish inside you yet again.

And again.

And again?

You lost count at some point.

Keigo apparently really liked you face-down, ass-up, and kept you like that as he fucked you full over and over again. After having his taloned-hand stuck into your hair holding you to the duvet and pillows for so long, your head was spinning. What made all of this all the more overwhelming was the small feather that never fucking stopped moving—

“Kei’, please!” You screamed, voice hoarse and dry. You’re spinning, aching, and yet you still want more.

Keigo’s pace increases, using his wings to rut against your cervix over and over. 

The tempo of the feather increased, Keigo’s growls falling away into his own shriek as he pushed forwards once more, hot cum spraying your walls all over again.

The sensations, all of them, pushed you over the edge, a shriek tearing from your throat as hot tears soaked the nest below. Your orgasm curled your toes to the point of pulling muscles, back bowing and straining as broiling pleasure swallowed you once more. 

Keigo might’ve kept fucking you after that, you couldn’t really remember. With the plumes of feathers under your knees, he could’ve and you wouldn’t have known.

Your body and mind were spent, trying to keep up with his appetite. Your eyes rolled back behind your eyelids, and lucidity was gone to you. 

 ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||

 You awoke to soft cooing sounds and the smell of sweat.

It was jarring, shifting the slightest bit and feeling aches and pains you didn’t even know you could have.

The cooing stuttered, falling into a chuckle.

Oh.

Keigo.

His rut.

Oh.

“Oh my god, Kei’, did you fuck me unconscious?” It came out almost as a growl, voice cracking and low. 

A hand carded through your hair as you opened your eyes, taking in the state of yourself, Keigo, and the nest.

You were both sweaty, sticky and smelling all sorts of musky. It was intoxicating, lulling you. It must’ve been those pheromones that Keigo had mentioned way back when.

Keigo had nestled you to his chest, wings spread behind him and shimmering. The windows outside showed only the neon of the city below, night having long since fallen.

He beamed down at you with a clear fondness, a lot of the tension gone from his body, and looking significantly less stressed. But, there was a sad quirk in his brow.

“Sorry about that, angel, I got kind of out of hand there,” Keigo replied sheepishly, smile turning a little sad. 

You frowned.

You couldn’t have him thinking that.

“Nope, no, not at all,” You pushed yourself on an elbow, wincing at the pain, but recovering to peppering his stubbly chin and cheeks with kisses. “None of that, silly. I am happy to help, whatever that entails. I love you, you know?”

Keigo relaxed even more, falling against the nest and pulling you to his chest, “You gotta stop being so sweet, dove. Gonna get me riled up again.”

You hummed, kissing the tip of his nose, “That’s more than fine, just rub my shoulders a bit first. I think I pulled something.”

He kissed at your sweaty hair, rubbing his hands up and down your sides, “I’m more than happy too, dove. Thank you.”

His hands met your shoulders, rubbing at the sore muscles, careful to avoid pressing his talons into the skin. 

You heard him say so softly, more to himself than to you, “I’m gonna keep you so safe.”

The grin that came across your face rivaled the sun in its brightness and honey with its sweetness. You melted into his touch, dissolving blissfully into the smells and feel of your nest. 

Keigo left kiss after kiss against soreness, cooing and clicking as his rut-based needs were more than met. 

For once.

[thisismyyearhenderson]

Don’t Let Him Go

BATTINSON X FEM!READER

Part Two

Words: 2.075k

Warning: Contains slight mention of alcohol, murder, torture, sexual admiration, blood, and LOTS OF ANGST. Bruce beating the shit out of edward nashton for being near you, sobbing bruce. Hehe get ready ;)))

A/N: Hi yall!! This is part two, to the short angst I wrote about a week ago. I kinda elaborate on the plot twist at the end of it in this one. Plot is basically, reader gets kidnapped by riddler, brucie comes in and then baboom read it to find out.

@thecraziestcrayon 4 u!! My follower #1!!

Your heels hit the concrete quickly, as you walk into your neighbourhoods bodega, the usual darkness enveloping the streets, except for the occasional street light. A store bell rings as you open the door, and the young clerk greets you. Pacing down to the big refrigerator at the back of the wall, you grab three spiked seltzers, as they’re cheap and get you drunk pretty fast. You press the cans against your chest, while walking up to the counter. 

The news rack near you catches your eye, so you pull one of the papers out of its stack. Eyes flipping through the news, you catch the words “Vigilante of Gotham City Gone, city in a frenzy” your eyes stick the the sentence, you reread it a few times. ‘It all makes sense, then, where is he? He hasn’t cut by called or texted in three fucking weeks.’ You thought, before the cashier interrupted with a mumble “14 dollars.” You nod at the statement absentmindedly while taking out your wallet, and handing him a crumple of bills. Grabbing the plastic bag, you hurry out of the store. 

Your breath hitches, and your eyes water. Shiftily stumbling around the corner, you illicit soft, quiet sobs. You can only hear the cars whooshing past, and the taps of your heels against the sidewalk. Tears fall down your face, warming your skin, and falling down onto your black coat. Thats when it hits you, you’ve been busying your mind with Bruces disappearance, that you haven’t noticed the presence of someone behind you. Your sobbing stops, and you stiffen. Hands travel slowly, to grapple the pocket knife in your coat pocket. It would most likely only incapacitate the man for a few seconds, but thats more time to run. 

“You shouldn’t steal.” The heavy toned voice slithers into your mind, you feel the mans breathing on your bare neck. The voice stretches out the ‘eel’ sound in the word ‘steal’, sending chills down your back. “Mhm. We don’t steal in Gotham” the voice slithers again. The voice is strangely familiar, and the topic… it has to be Bruce. “Bruce?..” you squeak, as you slowly turn on your heel, with the horrified look still on your face. “Mhhhhm. You. Wish, baby.” The horror on your face hardens as the voices gloved hand pulls on your shoulder, you look up at the mans eyes and…

Your heart beats out of your chest. The dark green mask and plastic glasses shine under the light of the dim street. This is who Bruce warned you about. The Riddler, Edward Nashton.

Your hand jerks, ready to stab the man and run. Before you can even pull out the knife, and click it open, he grasps your upper arm, and holds one of his gloved hands up to you. He brings it closer to your eyes, opening his palm, showing a small, shiny razor blade. “Wouldn’t want that, would we, sweets?” You nod, having to look up at him because of his height. “Good. Let’s go.” 

Edward shoves you into to the small black Nissan parked in front of the bodega. You sit in the front seat, horrified at what just happened. Your breath becomes heavy and slow, and he seems to notice. He pulls one side of a pair of handcuffs onto your wrist and the other on a small metal loop beside your head on the right side. Your stuck in an uncomfortable position, with both your hands hung near your temple. While he’s hunched over you, he stares, stares so deep that his eyes seem to ignite with psychosis and need. Need for you, your attention. He sits back into the drivers seat pulling the razor blade out of his coat pocket. He wears a moss green wind breaker and worn black slacks. The only identifiable thing about him is his mask. “This? Is gonna be in my reach while we drive home, so don’t pull any dumb shit, mhm, bunny?” He says waving the tiny razor while gesturing to you. Placing the razor back into his coat pocket, he takes off his glasses placing them in his lap, and then pulls off his mask. Edwards hairs falls out sweatily when he lifts his mask off, the dirty blond stuck to his forehead. He throws the mask into the backseat and pulls his glasses back on. Turning towards you he smirks wildly, that bewitched psychotic passion cutting through you with his gaze. “So gorgeous, I see the appeal.” He crackles through one of his infamous giggles. Pulling keys out of his pocket he starts up the car and coasts through streets.

You and Edward are now 20 minutes away from the bodega. Occasionally, he will look at you with fire in his eyes, excitedly chattering about how he planned this for so long, but he was in Arkham Hospital so, he wasn’t capable of carrying it out. Often smiling at nothing and complementing absolutely anything he notices that’s remotely positive. “Those heels make your legs look, fucking, mhm.” He would say while gazing up and down at your office outfit.  Then at one point, he abruptly pulls into an alleyway, located somewhere near a warehouse close to 44 Below. 

Jumping out of the drivers seat, he walks up to your door, pulls it open and undoes your handcuffs. You sit stagnant afraid to move. “Come.” He utters, pulling his mask and glasses onto his face once again. Handcuffs in his left hand, he wraps his other hand around your waist. You shudder, as his skin heats through his coat  burning onto yours. His fingers fiddle with your blouse as he leads you to the large steel doors. “Please. I- Bruce will pay you off.” You say shakily. 

Ed looks at you, you have to look up to see him clearly. “Mhm-mhm. Its not money I want. Its you. And Bruce.” 

He chuckled in a low tone. You looked at him with a terrified confusion plastered all over your features. Ed stopped abruptly as he saw your face. He inched closer to you until he was a centimeter away. “I need Bruce, because I want him to watch. That man, needs to see what his poor girl, is about to experience.” He hissed at you, the violent scent of tobacco violating your senses. He was so close you could feel his breath. Tears streamed down your face once again. Ed brought his gloved hand up to your face and wiped your eyes with his thumb, his fingers cupped under your jaw. You flinched at the movement. 

“Mhm. So, easy to catch.” He muttered as he placed his lips on your forehead, but only the leather of his mask touched your skin. Ed stayed there for a few solid minutes, breathing in your scent. Then, he continued his trek towards the doors. With a light push, the doors creaked open. 

Clicking on all the light switches took a few seconds, but when all the lights were on, you crumpled out a loud sob. The warehouse was relatively small, but had a bed, shelves and was similar to a living arrangement. The thing was, it was filled with copies of all the Riddlers contraptions. And their were new additions, small shelves messily piled with double carved knives, and cages of rats and rodents. “Oh, don’t be scared, hun. Rome wasn’t built in a day. We’ll use these over a course of time.” He mumbled at you as he took off his mask and glasses, placing them on a side table near the big doors. He ordered you to stay right there, and you did. Edward clamped the door shut with multiple code locks and came up to you. You were sobbing silently by this point, so he whispered that you’ll be fine, and, you guys will have fun. 

“Now. Im gonna go clean you up. Want you to be all clean” He muttered while leading you to a shower-bath connected to a small pipe in the corner of the warehouse. Tears were falling so quickly you couldn’t wipe them quick enough. “Coat off.” he said, gesturing at your outfit. 

Shakily you pulled your coat off placing it on the floor, then your shoes. In a pile on the floor. You stood in your skirt, pantyhose, and blouse. You stared up at Edward, with concerned eyes. “Jesus fucking christ.” He muttered circling around you like a vulture. He commanded you to wash your hands and face, and you obliged. While you were bent over the bathtubs ledge, rising your hands, Edward turned toward you “Now. I have a surprise for you. Someones here to see you.” He quipped, while standing beside you, waving his hands to the door.

Bruce. Oh, fuck. Bruce. Thank god. 

“Im gonna open the door, if you fucking move, I will shoot your brains out. Ok, my dove?” He cackled at you as he pulled you up from the floor, dragged you around and made you stumble against the wall. Ed stuck his hand into the inner pocket if his coat, pulling out a small hand gun, cocking it and waving it near your head. You nodded rapidly, breath trembling. He walked away, came close to the door and whispered something through it. Something like “you touch me, I shoot your dove” in a low deranged mumble. You heard agreements and a small clatter of locks. Your eyelids were pressed closed, trying to process the situation.

Then you heard his voice, “Y/N?!” Some sounds of tapping and shuffling later, you see him, 50 feet away. In his baggy hoodie and sweatpants, and that cloth rag he wore on his face. Then, Ed comes back into your frame of vision. “Delightful, isn’t it?” He chuckled at Bruce, who is standing with his hands hanging at his sides, and eyes glistening. Horrified, just as you are. A mass terrorist and murder had just kidnapped his woman, and was with her alone for who knows how many hours. You saw the anger burn through, his eyes, holding himself back he turned to Ed. Edward was holding the gun at his side.  “What do you, want?!” Bruce shrieked at him, in a slight shrill hush. Ed smiled, and turned towards him, looking him in the eye. “I want you to watch as I, fuck the shit out of your bitch.”

One of Bruce’s familiar caustic growls burnt through the room as he grappled Ed, crushing his fist into his face. As soon as Bruce reached for Edwards gun..

That’s when the burn started. The shrieks you uttered vocalized through the room. You slid down the wall, your hand feeling at your shoulder. Warm blood dripped from your shoulder to the floor, to where your body was writhing. During all this Bruce was still busy incapacitating Edward, crushing his bones deep into his skull. 

When Bruce realized the bullet hit you, he kicked Ed’s gun out of his hand and ran up to you. Blood was flowing onto your blouse and your vision was splotchy. Bruces face swam in your vision, he was peeling you off of the floor and holding you in his arms. His large hand pressed hard onto your shoulder as he picked you up in a bridal hold, carrying you out of the warehouse. You noticed he was sobbing just as hard as you were, while screaming for help in the street.

You have never seen Bruce so helpless. His voice cracked as he screamed into the vast space of the dim city. After some time , your fingers clutched onto him, pulling on his neck and face. “Kiss

me.” You rasped, as police and ambulances pulled into the alley. And he did. He did it with such love and vigor, as if this was his only life passion, like it was his last. You kissed back, as best as you could. 

You held his face in your almost limp hands, and whispered “Please don’t cry, baby.” As he sobbed over you. He pulled you close to him your chest pressed against his, feeling his heartbeat. “Im so sorry. Im so sorry.” He whispered in your ear again and again, with melancholic quivers in his speech. As your consciousness swam in and out, his voice did too.

“Im so sorry.”

Rang through your ears as you lay in the hospital bed. Looking around the room with dim eyes, you were, unsurprisingly, alone.

Alone. Again. 

[limitlessgojo]

The More You Know

Warnings: NSFW Content

NSFW Tags: SMUT, Mutual masturbation, Squirting, over-sensitivity, Sex Education, unprotected sex, Bareback, dry humping, First time with Noritoshi, explicit content

Tags: Kamo Noritoshi x Reader, Soulmates AU, Smut, Fluff, Fem!Reader

NSFW Taglist: @fkngkumiko @gojoussunglasses @s-t-f-u-b-i-t-c-h @sunaswife

Word Count: 3.5k

Notes: I tagged this to the best of my ability. As I've already said, minors please DNI with my NSFW works.

Previous Chapter: Home Sweet Home

Next Chapter: Big White Lies

Blood Bound: Red Strings of Fate.

Chapter 13.5

Utahime Sensei called both you and Noritoshi into her office one afternoon to give you "the talk." She’s aware that both of you are dating.

You and Noritoshi worriedly looked at each other before sitting down, across from her desk.

“There’s no need to be worried. You both haven’t done anything wrong. I just wanted to check up on the two of you.” She clarified. You both relaxed.

“Y/N, how are you adjusting to life on campus so far?”

“Ah, yes I’ve been adjusting well, thanks to everyone who has been helping me here and there. I’ve also grown used to the campus.”

“That’s great to hear. Looks like all of you first years are now settled in. Which brings me to my next question,” She started getting serious. "So, of course I know that both of you are dating. Teachers hear things from other students, it’s natural. Did you both get your parents’ permission to date each other?”

“Ah, yes, my mom and dad both know and said it’s okay for me to date senpai. They’ve been wanting to meet him as well. Next time when we are on break.” You said meekly.

Noritoshi quickly turned to you, eyes widening. Ah, you haven’t told him yet that they wanted to meet him. “They said it’s no big rush. We can do it over Christmas break.” Your voice quieted down.

“My parents have also approved of our relationship, as you know.” He put a hand to your back and spoke comfortingly. As always, your body relaxes under his warm touch. Hearing that made the knot in your chest slightly loosen up.

Utahime looked pleased at that. “That’s excellent to hear. Everything seems to be in order. And, have you both… you know… done "it" yet?"

Your eyes widened, then you flushed red before shaking your head. Noritoshi replied with a soft "No, we haven't." Face just as red as yours, before he forced it down.

The room suddenly felt stuffy and hot. Was this conversation really necessary?

“Ahem,” Utahime cleared her throat. “This is a very important conversation, and I want to make sure that both of you are engaging in consensual and safe sexual practices if you ever decide to do it. I’m aware that both of you are already of legal consenting ages here. That and it’s not uncommon for teenagers in Japan to do such.”

Gosh, just let this pass already, you thought to yourself, utterly mortified.

“So now I’ll talk you through the use of contraceptives and birth control then.” It was a mini sex education class with just the 3 of you.

And the rest of the afternoon was filled with a lot of do’s and don’ts and the explanation of how to use condoms. Noritoshi’s soul was practically leaving his body at the very thought.

“Don’t be shy to ask me for help in buying condoms or birth control pills. I’d rather both of you have safe sexual practices than not.” She ordered sternly.

You both quickly nodded, “Yes sensei.”

“Okay, that should be all. Then off you go.” She ushered you both out of her office, ready to prepare for another faculty meeting later.

After you both left the room, you slowly walked back to your dorm with Noritoshi close behind you. An unspoken agreement hung in the air as you filed into your dorm room.

He doesn’t come over to yours as often as you go over to his room, but he likes it. You’re happy that he doesn’t mind the numerous stuffed toys or fluffy blankets on your bed.

You served him some tea and mochi, not having spoken a word still. He stayed silent as well.

“....” your face was still red. Noritoshi found it almost funny and incredible, how it stayed red for such a long time. He reached out to cup your face.

You leaned into his touch. His hands were slightly cold, taking away some of the heat off your face.

“I won’t do anything you don’t want to. For us I mean. Like what we just talked about now. I’m okay if you’re okay with it. Completely.” He stumbled over his words.

You nodded and reached out for a hug, which he gladly gave. Sitting on his lap, cradled in his arms. “I… I’m okay with it. The sex talk was just really embarrassing, but inevitable.”

You shyly looked up at him. He gave a weak smile in return, trying to slow down the blood rising to his face. His ears were still pink though.

"When we are both ready then." He hastily uttered before changing the topic. You giggled. He was more reserved than you expected.

◇◇◇

A week later...

You’ve both taken to reading Kamo no Hotaru’s diary entries together when you were both alone and undisturbed. One evening, during a rare moment of peace when both of you had no schedules, you stayed in Noritoshi’s room, laying on his bed. “Toshi! That entry! It matches our first shared vision together!”

“Right. I noticed that when I browsed over it too. He really…” Noritoshi trails off. You perk up and cuddle into his side, facing back to the diary, “What is it?”

He abruptly closes the book shut, face really red. It was a good thing this was a copy of the original, because of the way he roughly handled it.

Why. “Toshi!!! Lemme see~” you whined, grabbing the book. He couldn’t look you in the eye as he handed you the book. You eagerly flipped through to where you stopped.

Hotaru was describing his fight with his beloved Misaki. “She must have been the woman in my visions then huh.”

Noritoshi buried his face into the junction of your shoulder and neck. You stared at him. His face and ears were on fire. “Toshi, are you not feeling well? Fever?” You pressed a palm onto his forehead. He shook his head and snuggled into your hand. The blush settled down rather quickly.

This guy never fails to cheat with his body temperature huh.

Anyways, going back to the passage.

“Misaki was lovely tonight. She astounds me every single time she fights with those demons and curses. Just the most beautiful sight to behold.”

“Awww, what a dreamy man” you sighed. Noritoshi’s grip on you tightened.

“Tonight was the first night in my life that I was able to hold her so close to me. We went back to the inn and had our baths before going to bed. We only had one futon, since the inn was in some far off and secluded area. It was also full, so we had no choice. We ought to be getting back to the urbanised districts soon. Her hair smelled nice. I can’t forget how her cheeks turned dark red when I undressed her. Her soft mounds under my hands. -

You shut the book, closed your eyes and stuck your tongue out hard against the inside of your cheek. Total silence filled the room for like 5 minutes before you opened it and continued reading,

“I’ve never felt anything softer than Misaki. Every curve of hers was to my liking. Every sound she made was comparable to the voice of an angel’s. She tasted so sweet down below. I never thought I’d be one to have premarital sexual relations, but to hell with it all.”

Noritoshi peeked over your shoulder, arms still wound tightly around you with one eye open, reading the passage together with you.

“I will try to remember in vivid detail how exactly I’ve taken her. It was a rush of the moment sort of thing. She was such a shy thing, covering her eyes as I undressed in front of her.

Only to cry for me to fill her up moments later. I took my time with her, tasting and feeling every bit of her body. Not long after, I made love to her. Her insides were warm and molded perfectly to me.

We both felt like we were melting into each other. Our Crimson bindings out and about, floating around our bodies as we indulged each other in pleasure.

It was worth leaving everything behind, in order to experience this life with her. We had to take great care so as for Misaki to not bear a child as we are still in the midst of fighting battles with demons here and there."

“Damn that guy was desperate for some action.” You said out loud. Noritoshi choked hard on his spit at this. You didn’t even take your eyes off the ancient erotica you were reading as you reached out with one hand to pat Nori on the back.

“Not like they had condoms or contraceptives back then huh. How difficult.” You wondered. “Y/N I-” Noritoshi sputtered. You turned to him. He looked like a deer caught in the headlights.

“You what…” your eyes trailed down at the movement. All of the sudden there was a pillow on his lap. He turned away, forcing his hard-on to disappear.

Noritoshi was just a very sweet little thing. He was really taken aback with your lack of fluster at the moment.

Whenever he whispers into your ears and holds your hand you blush. He secretly loved nipping at you and playing with your fingers to make your face glow red.

Even when Utahime sensei gave both of you the talk, you looked mortified. But since that day, you seemed to have gained a layer of quiet confidence.

And here you were reading an old smutty diary entry with a straight face.

An unpleasant thought came to his mind as he blurted out, "Have you had any experience at all? With this…. These things?"

Your eyes widened, before you shook your head. "Mmm to be honest none at all. You're pretty much my first everything Toshi. First boyfriend. First kiss. First love. You know."

Noritoshi relaxed. "Me too, you're my first for everything." You smiled at him, moving to hug him before he grabbed your hand to stop you from going further. His other one tightened on the pillow on top of his crotch.

Ah.

You wanted to help him but… Is it too early for the both of you? You wanted to wait for Noritoshi to bring it up. Unfortunately, he doesn't make any moves.

He is still very much a gentleman, politely turning away and closing his eyes whenever you get dressed or undressed in the ensuite bathroom. And really, it did touch your heart at the fact that he was really so sweet with you.

“Toshi, do you want any help with that?” You set the diary down on the side table. He flinched before slowly turning to you.

“Do you not find it disgusting?” He asked weakly.

“Mmmm, not really." You crawled into his lap, your face now slightly pink. You wanted this. You wanted to see more of him, know more about his body underneath the wide and loose fitting clothes.

“If you don’t want me to, that's also okay. Like you said, we have time. This isn’t something to be rushed Toshi."

He looked up at you. Deep down he really wanted this. But he wasn't prepared for it to go this fast. He didn't buy any condoms, lube, or contraceptives for you at all. He still had yet to research on more safe sex practices.

He shook his head. "I'm not worried about me, I'm worried about you. We only talked about this the other day, I hope it's not too fast for you."

"I'm okay as well, no it's not too fast."

"As long as we are both fine with it, then it's okay."

"So… what do you want me to do?"

He turned bright red, not bothering to use his jujutsu to force it away. He wanted his body to be honest with you. "We don't have to go all the way now. Please touch me down... there. I'm clean. Just took a shower before you came in."

You nodded, tossing away the pillow on his lap as you undressed him. There were so many layers of clothing. Your mouth watered in anticipation upon seeing the outline of his erection clearly straining against his clothes.

And the one thing you've been looking forward to seeing. He parted his inner white yukata, revealing his abs and pecs. Holy shit. He is built and defined. With a solid 8 pack of abs, arms with biceps and triceps.

You gulped. Noritoshi stared at your reaction. "You like my body."

"Ah I do. Noritoshi, you're really pretty." You admitted.

Noritoshi shut his eyes and felt the last of his sanity fizzling out. Why aren't you close to him then?

"You took the words out of my mouth, pretty one." He pulled you to his chest, nipping at your ears and neck. He knew all your sensitive spots, easily making your body react to him.

"Toshiii, haa no it tickles" Shaking in his arms, you pressed against him, running your hands down his front.

"Looks like I really don't need to hold back with you." He growled, gripping you tighter.

You hooked your fingers on the waistband of his pants and pulled it down, revealing his length. It sprung up, pretty and already hard.

It was big, long, thick, with veins protruding, and the mushroom-like head was a blushing pink. You stared numbly, wondering how it would ever fit inside of you.

You cautiously fisted him. It was so hot and heavy, twitching in your hands. You pooled spit in your mouth before letting it drip onto the tip of his length, making him glide easier in your hands.

Noritoshi threw his head back at the action, breathing heavily. Small jolts of electricity ran through his body, upon feeling your lips on his chest and neck.

"Angel, it feels much better when you do it. I wanna make you feel good too, please." His voice is deeper than normal, sending shivers down your spine.

He didn't hesitate as he pulled off your top as you nodded. You felt self conscious, covering up your breasts. "No need to hide from me. You're a gorgeous sight for sore eyes." Noritoshi pushed away your arms and sucked on your tits, making you gasp out.

"Toshi."

"Mmmm." He swirled his tongue around your nipples, playfully tugging and sucking on them like they were candy. Your pants and underwear were quickly discarded, leaving you bare.

Cold air hit your entrance, making you tense up. Noritoshi's hands stroked your legs until they settled on your ankles.

"Spread your legs for me," he murmured. You couldn't say no to that. You slowly widened them, inch by inch, the bed creaking underneath you.

He stared at your wet opening, parting your lower lips. It was glistening with slick. He dragged two fingers over them. Sinking in his fingers and groaning at the sensation of your walls. It was hotter and wetter than he expected it to be.

"Here I was, trying to stop myself from losing control over you, only to find out you've wanted me too." He scoffed. You grew more and more aroused at hearing his voice become deeper, just slowly nodding in agreement, unable to speak. The only sounds coming from your mouth were moans and whimpers of his name.

Squelching noises filled the quiet room as he began to experiment with your body. Nothing escaped Noritoshi. He stared at you, watching and analysing your reactions with every curve, push, pull, and movement from his fingers.

Not long after, he found your sweet spot, pressing his fingers eagerly into it. You shivered.

He leaned over to kiss you while slowly fucking you with his fingers. The pressure on your insides made you feel floaty. You reached out to continue stroking him as well, making him tense against you until you slumped against him, head feeling way too hot and dizzy.

He huffed a laugh, “Too much for you angel? It feels good doesn’t it?” You whined at him with a pout, guiding yourself up and down on his fingers. Your voice grew louder when he pulled them out.

"Shh, give me a second." Noritoshi repositioned both of you, so that you were sitting on his lap. Putting some pillows behind him as he leaned against the headboard of the bed.

It was a slightly risky position, he could easily enter you from this angle so you had to push your back against his chest, comforted by his warmth.

"Let me play with you." Who was this man and where was your stoic Toshi? Noritoshi kissed everywhere he could reach, the side of your face, your shoulder, cheeks and neck.

"Come on, rub yourself against me." You felt him smile against your skin.

You took his length and grinded your pussy down on him, slathering your juices onto him. Tears streamed down your face. "Why does it feel so good? Ssss too much."

His hands were cupping and squeezing your breasts, holding you firm against his chest. You could feel the sweat gathering on your back.

Both of your Phoenix marks were glowing a bright red, illuminating both of your features. You reached to clasp his wrist, feeling the warmth seep out from his mark.

Heat. That was the main shared sensation between the two of you. Simply and drunkenly chasing after pleasure. The soulmate bond showed you his inner desires of breeding you, filling you up, pleasing you, and making you content. You felt touched and giddy.

Noritoshi's head is hooked over your shoulder. Mouth watering at the sight of him thrusting against your thighs. The tip of his cock poked up and down between your legs. Your ass was pressing hard against his hips, driving him insane.

You both grinded against each other at a moderate pace. Hiccups and mewls escaped your lips as you drooled.

You tightened your thighs when he sped up his thrusts. Your pussy feels hotter with each passing moment. He was humping you so hard, you started to lightly bounce on his lap.

All you could feel and smell was Noritoshi. The scent of sex was heavy in the air. You've never felt this type of greed over a person before. It scared you a bit.

"Darling, come on me." Noritoshi breathed out huskily against your ear. You shivered, squeezing and crossing your thighs. He softly grunted as he came all over your legs, the cum still hot.

Amazed, Noritoshi watched as you also squirted, spraying all over both of your legs and the mattress. He leaned over to rub your clit more, feeling it spew against his fingers as he put a heavy pressure on it. “Haaah! Toshi, no stop!! It feels so good!” You threw your head back wildly, feeling your legs spasm beyond your control at the touch of oversensitivity.

"Is that a no or a yes?" He nipped your earlobe as he continued rubbing your clit.

"More. Gimme more." You moaned.

He smirked, immediately plunging two fingers into you, pistoning it in and out as fast as he could, while his thumb continuously stroked at your clit. He held you tight as you sobbed his name unabashedly.

A second orgasm violently washed over you, making you shake. He helped you ride it out, by slowing down his movements until you collapsed against him.

It was hard not to fall asleep as you both stopped to catch a breath, but you had to clean up. “Sorry for making a mess.” You turned to face him and frowned upon feeling the stickiness on both of your legs.

His eyes glinted darkly, “No, don’t apologize. We both made a mess. I quite like it.” You hid your smile in his neck at that.

"We can take a quick shower then go to bed if you'd like?" Noritoshi offered.

"Mmm… sounds good."

The shower was quick and pleasant. It was nice to smell like Noritoshi. You happily hummed to yourself as you lathered your arms with his body soap. It smells nice and deep with touches of bergamot and clove.

On the other hand, Noritoshi was having an internal crisis. He just wanted to stuff you full of his cum right there as he helped you bathe, but was determined to wait until you got married to do so.

You went to bed in one of his kimonos after changing his sheets. Noritoshi loves how you look in his clothes and how you smell like him now.

"Thank you…" You whispered.

Noritoshi's body was so warm as he pulled you to him, his lips pressed against your temple. "Mmm, thank you also for trusting me with your body. I feel so relaxed, should we do this more often?"

You squawked in surprise, pushing his chest and laughing with him. "Nori's not so pure minded after all. Here I thought you were super conservative."

"Never said I was, angel."

◇◇◇

The next day, you were both mortified when Todo came up to tell you to keep it down next time. His room is next to Noritoshi's.

The both of you didn't realize he was home when that went down. “I'm soundproofing my room after this.” Noritoshi exasperatedly sighed at you.

"Ahh, maybe I should do the same with mine," You fiddled with your shirt. He smiled, leaning down to see you eye to eye, "You're looking forward to doing it with me again, I presume?"

If he wasn't so handsome right there, with his eyes bright and filled with so much joy, you're sure you would have smacked him in the chest.

".... No comment."

Blood Bound: Table of Contents

Author's notes: Had to check the legal age in Japan for consent to sexual activities and the laws are SO MESSY. Long story short, the official age of consent is 13. Based on prefecture, for 16-18 years old, it is legal if they have consent to date from their parents. Basically, they’re trying to prevent relationships with huge age gaps for teens (with over 20 year olds) who might be taken advantage of. Toshi and Y/n’s bdays have passed already, so they’re 17 and 16 here.

Of course note that this is all fiction anyways.

[httpjeon]

❝first time together❞ jjk ― m.

― summary: you never thought you’d fall for the charms of jeon jungkook, the campus heartthrob, play boy, and fuck boy.

jungkook/reader| college!au | fluff, smut, angst | 8.4k ↬ content warnings: light virgin kink, dirty talk, cunnilingus (with jk’s pierced tongue), blow job, praise kink, creampie, manipulation, fuckboy!jk, pierced!jk, u may hate jk sorry

a/n: thank you to my lovely beta @yoonqiful for editing this baby for me!

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You remember seeing him on campus before — how could you miss him, really? Your circle of friends ran close but not close enough that you really knew him.

He was handsome, easy enough to admit with dark, curly hair overshadowing bright doe-like eyes. He had a nose ring and a lip ring which he constantly played with. You'd also heard on the grapevine the man possessed a tongue piercing as well.

He was basically every girl’s fantasy — a good looking bad boy who would break your heart after giving you the best night of your life. He lived up to the hype of his reputation as well.

You were a freshman and within your first two semesters, you learned just how big of a name Jeon Jungkook was on campus. Most likely hundreds of notches on his bedpost and none making it past a one night stand.

Many women would agree to sleep with him in hopes they could “change” him, only to be disappointed and heartbroken in the end. It was a vicious cycle that he was, no doubt, proud of.

So, you vowed to never get anywhere near Jeon Jungkook. That sentiment worked fairly well for a while, but well, it wasn’t in the cards for you to avoid meeting the man.

Walking onto campus for a shitty morning class, you were exhausted from staying up late studying for a test. You take a sip from the coffee you got earlier from the cafe. It hasn’t quite kicked in yet, leaving you drowsy.

You hadn't even realized anyone was near you until you tripped over someone's foot, crashing to the ground harshly.

“Hey,” A voice grumbled, harshly grabbing the back of your shirt to pull you up. You choked slightly as the collar of the shirt dug into your neck. “You got coffee all over me, you know?”

“I-I'm sorry,” You grumbled, shaking his grip off of you as you stood — peeved that he didn't even care he literally tripped you. “I didn't mean to.”

“This shirt cost me a lot of money,” He pestered. You finally looked up at him. “How much cash you got on you now, maybe that'll cover it.”

You scoffed. “I'm not paying for your shirt when you tripped me,” You argued, crossing your arms over your chest. “I have a class to go to.”

You turned your back to the stranger, intending to walk away before he harshly grabbed your arm. You gasped, nearly losing your footing once again when he tugged you closer.

“Look bitch,” He growled. “I told you this shirt is expensive. You ruined it so pay me for it.”

You opened your mouth to tell him to go to hell before someone cleared their throat behind you.

“What the fuck do you want Jeon?” The stranger snapped, grip tightening on your arm.

“Man, no wonder you never get laid if this is how you treat a lovely lady,” You looked over your shoulder to find yourself gazing into the ridiculously handsome face of Jeon Jungkook.

“You're a dick, Jeon,” Your harasser let you go, lightly shoving you so you stumbled towards Jungkook before stalking off.

“Are you alright?” Jungkook asked, smiling. His lip ring sparkled in the early morning light.

“Yeah,” You signed, rubbing where the man had a rough grip on you. “Thanks for that, Jungkook.”

“Oh, you know my name!” His grin broadened.

“Yeah,” You nodded, adjusting your bag on your shoulder. “You're friends with Jimin who’s friends with Taehyung. Plus, no offense, I think every girl on campus knows you.”

He nodded, smile not diminishing in the slightest as he shoved his hands into his jeans pockets. “That's fair. It was nice to finally meet you, though. Can I walk you to class?”

You hesitated, wanting to say no but he had just done you a favor in chasing that asshole off. Sighing softly, you nodded and motioned for him to follow you.

“Oh you have anatomy with Mrs. Park huh?” He asked, recognizing the direction you were taking. “I took this class my freshman year as well.”

“What grade are you in?” You asked.

“Junior,” He replied. “Just clocked in 65 credit hours.” He shrugged.

Jungkook was the type of man you'd expect to be a dropout. Learning he'd been working hard, no doubt aiming to graduate, surprised you. It just showed that you shouldn’t judge someone by their reputation.

Shortly after your exchange with Jungkook, with him walking you to class, you found yourself seeing him a lot more frequently. Sometimes it seemed almost too coincidental, like being around your anatomy class when it ended claiming he was just seeing a friend who had a class on that same hall.

"Hey _____," A familiar voice had you pausing and turning around.

"Oh Hoseok," You smiled, smiling up at him as he walked closer to you.

"You got a minute?" He asked, hands stuffed in his pockets.

"Yeah, actually class was canceled today. I was about to go home," You explained. "You want to head to the cafe?"

"Yeah that'd be great," You noticed how his shoulders were tense and his smile didn't seem as bright. It appeared something was on his mind.

"Do you want to invite Taehyung?" You asked, beginning to walk along with him. "No it's not necessary," He said. "I just need to talk to you."

"Not gonna lie, you got me a little worried here Hobi," You chuckled nervously.

"Don't worry," He patted your back. "It's not that bad! But I am going to get called back into work in a minute so I don't have long."

You hummed, the two of you falling into silence as you navigated the familiar path to the campus cafe.

It was bustling, as expected, but since a lot of people had class at that time, there were still a couple tables open. Hoseok picked the most secluded table to sit at, not unusual for him. Despite his sunshiney nature, he was still a bit reclusive — not really liking hustle and bustle and preferring to keep away from prying eyes.

"So, what's bothering you?" You asked, resting your chin on your hand.

"It's about Jeon Jungkook," He sighed, making you stiffen immediately.

"Wh-What about him?" You gulped.

"_____," He sighed. "You know I care about you. You're my best friend. I mean this with...so much sincerity." He met your eyes. "Stay away from him, okay?"

"Wh...What?" You shook your head, not understanding.

"He's been asking around about you," Hoseok whispered. "I heard from Taehyung about it. Please stay away from him. He is the most..." His phone started buzzing, making him sigh. "He's—"

"Do you need to get that?" You asked.

Hoseok sighed again, looking at his phone. "Yeah but..." He started to stand up. "I've got to go but, ______. Please listen, he's the most notorious cherry picker ever. So, just stay away from him!"

"Hey!" You called after him, watching as he put the phone to his ear and started jogging out. "What does that even mean?"

Sighing, you crashed onto your bed — letting the familiar scent of your detergent calm you.

Your phone vibrating in your pocket alerted you to a new text. You pulled it out and unlocked it, realizing it was a text from an unknown number.

From: Unknown [2:18PM] Hey😏

They were typing so you sat there and waited.

From: Unknown [2:18PM] Is this _____?

They started typing again and you raised your brow — growing impatient.

From: Unknown [2:18PM] It's Jungkook btw

Your brows shot straight up at the reveal. Fingers hovering over the keyboard, you thought of a response, unsure of what you could possibly say.

To: Jeon Jungkook [2:19PM] Yes...this is _____. How did you get my number?

From: Jeon Jungkook [2:19PM] It's a secret😬

To: Jeon Jungkook [2:20PM] Okay. What do you want?

From: Jeon Jungkook [2:20PM] Do you have class tomorrow?

To: Jeon Jungkook [2:20PM] Yes I have a class at 10.

From: Jeon Jungkook [2:21PM] Cool. Meet me at the campus cafe at 9?

You sat there and stared at the message as it settled in. You weren't sure of what to say but you knew you wanted to say yes. Jungkook was intriguing — dangerously so. The way he acted, the air he carried with him had you wanting to see more. It was like he had a magnetic pull.

But Hoseok's words were still there, lingering in the back of your mind. Stay away from Jeon Jungkook.

Before you realized what you were doing, however, a message was sent.

To: Jeon Jungkook [2:22PM] Um, sure...that'd be nice. See you then!

You tugged the hood of your hoodie over your head as you reached the cafe. It was packed as usual and you were more than a little tired from not sleeping well. Tugging the door open, you cringed as the noise level rose.

Looking around, you spotted Jungkook sitting in the corner with his eyes glued to his phone. He had a little smirk on his face as he typed something and your heart began to race.

Weaving through the people, you finally reached his table and took a seat. He immediately looked up and locked his phone, bright eyes finding yours as he greeted you good morning.

"Oh I got you a coffee and a muffin," He said, gesturing to the two items on the table. "I didn't know what you liked so I got something a little sweet."

"I like everything here to be honest," You muttered, pulling your hood down before bringing the still hot coffee to your lips.

"You look like you haven't slept a wink," He said, cocking his head to the side.

"I didn't really," You shrugged. "But this coffee should wake me up, thank you Jungkook."

"It's not a problem," He smiled, a cute bunny-like smile that contrasted with the black piercing on his lip.

The two of you drifted easily through conversation; topics coming easily as you discovered different things you had in common. You learned Jungkook was actually a really big fan of anime and used to collect manga before he had to move into the dorms.

The hour passed faster than you could have expected and you found yourself...disappointed when it was time for you to leave.

"How about I walk you to class?" He asked, standing up as soon as he realized the time.

"I'd like that," You muttered, blushing when he opened the door for you to escort you out.

You found yourself glancing at him whenever you were sure he wasn't paying attention. You noticed his ears were gauged and today he wore his curled bangs parted in the middle — allowing just a peek of his forehead. It was unfair how attractive he was.

And when he smiled, you found yourself smiling along with him. Everything about Jeon Jungkook gave you butterflies.

It made you understand why so many women were wanting him. Deep down, you could feel that same urge building inside of you. The only thing it was held back by was Hoseok's warning.

"I'll see you later, Jungkook," You smiled, standing outside your classroom door. "Yeah, I look forward to it," He flashed you a big smile with a short wink before he turned on his heel and walked the same way he'd come.

You were unable to tear your eyes off of his form. Even the way he walked exuded so much confidence.

They say confidence is sexy and Jungkook definitely fit the bill.

He vanished from your sight and you finally entered the classroom.

"Curse you Jeon Jungkook," You whined when you got home, flopping down on your bed.

Class hadn't gone well at all with said man plaguing your thoughts. You found yourself daydreaming every 5 minutes about Jungkook; his handsome face, pretty smile, and sparkling eyes refusing to leave your mind.

Still, despite the fact he was such an unpleasant distraction in class, you found yourself holding your phone hoping it'd buzz with an incoming text.

After more than an hour, it did and you jumped at the chance to see the sender.

From: Jeon Jungkook [11:11AM] You know, I really liked hanging out with you, _____.

Your heart skipped a beat and you bit your lip to contain the girlish giggle that was threatening to spill out.

To: Jeon Jungkook [11:12AM] I really liked it too. You're really fun to talk to.

From: Jeon Jungkook [11:12AM] I'm glad.😜 I was wondering...

You sat up, eyes locked on those that typing bubble — watching as he erased and restarted several times.

From: Jeon Jungkook [11:13AM] The school hosts a summer fireworks show this weekend. I was wondering if you'd like to go...as a date?

To: Jeon Jungkook [11:13AM] I would love to!

You cringed as you realized you sounded too eager. Your cheeks burned even though it wasn't even a face to face interaction. Swallowing thickly, you watched the bubbles appear again and your heart began to race hoping you hadn't just made a fool of yourself.

From: Jeon Jungkook [11:14AM] I'm glad. I'll pick you up at about 5 on Friday.

And like that, you had planned a date with Jeon Jungkook.

Even though you knew you'd regret it later in the night, you put on the cutest summer dress you owned. It complimented your figure and made your legs look fantastic. You only hoped Jungkook would notice it too.

For some reason, it filled you with excitement to dress up for someone — for a date.

You and Jungkook had been texting nonstop since he asked you on a date. He apologized for asking over text but it was the only opportunity that you had.

Truth be told, you didn't get the cute highschool romance experience so it was fun to have a little taste of what that would have been like.

Your doorbell rang and you grabbed your shoes, hurrying to slip them on and open the door. Jungkook was leaning against the railing wearing a loose tank top and jeans. You couldn't help but stare at his biceps for a quick second before forcing yourself out the door. As you locked it, you could feel Jungkook's eyes burning holes it you.

"What is it?" You asked, turning around to find his eyes scanning your whole body. Immediately, you felt your cheeks heat up all the way to your ears. "You look really good...wow," He grinned, a sideways quirk of his lips.

"I..." You bit your lip and smiled. "Thank you."

"Ready to go?" You nodded and hopped down the stairs to follow after him. He led you down the sidewalk to where his car was parked near the curb. A simple act such as opening your door for you made your heart flutter and you swear you almost gave a deep, dreamy sigh.

Jungkook was well-prepared, he even brought a blanket for you both to sit on so you could comfortably enjoy the fireworks. The place was lively, music playing from some speakers set up nearby and people laughing and having fun.

"Let's pick a spot," He said and grabbed your hand.

Effortlessly, your fingers laced together and he gave your hand a light squeeze before throwing a smile over his shoulder. Your gaze fell to your linked hands and you giggled, the sound drowned out by the noise surrounding you.

Jungkook ended up picking a rather secluded place on a hill. It was peaceful, but you were still able to hear the music playing so it wasn't awkwardly silent. You helped him lay down the blanket and laughed when he let himself flop onto it with a groan.

"That was such a long walk!" He complained.

"It wasn't even that bad," You chuckled, sitting down beside him.

The sun was beginning to set and before you knew it they were getting ready to start the show. You watched as people all around took seats together in preparation for the fireworks. It was buzzing with good energy and you felt a burst of confidence flow through you.

Reaching over you took Jungkook's hand in yours. Immediately, he laced your fingers together and gave your hand a squeeze. His skin was so soft and his hands were warm, comforting almost.

When it was time for you to go home, you were filled with the same disappointment you felt last time you were with him. Having him around was so nice, you felt so happy with him.

You never wanted it to end.

He parked the car in front of your apartment and got out, jogging to the other side to open your door for you.

"Thank you," You said, as you slowly began to walk up to your stoop with him, wanting to draw it out as long as possible. "I had a great time tonight."

He shoved his hands in his pockets and nodded, curls bouncing in his face. He nibbled on his lip ring and paused when you were standing in front of your door.

"A friend of mine is having a party tomorrow at his place," He said. "Would you like to be my date there?"

You hesitated this time; you wanted to go, really you did. Just for Jungkook though. Truthfully, you weren't a party person. You always end up feeling awkward and out of place, unable to have a nice time.

But with Jungkook standing there, pretty pierced face looking hopeful at you, you found yourself nodding.

"Okay, I'll go," You gave him a tight-lipped smile and he beamed.

"Great!" He began to back off. "I'll see you tomorrow!"

You waved and watched as he got into his car and pulled off. Sighing, you wondered why the hell you were so enamored with him.

Deep inside, you knew why.

You step out of the car, already feeling the bass of the music playing inside. Jungkook took your hand and any apprehension inside you vanished the second his fingers laced between yours.

Once inside, you were shocked at how many people were packed inside. It was a decently sized house but even so, you couldn't even comfortably move through the crowd. All around you people were crowding you as they drunkenly swayed to the beat.

"Let's head to the kitchen and get a drink!" He called over the music, tugging you in the direction of what you assumed was the kitchen.

"Have you been here before?" You asked as you entered the kitchen, where it was much quieter.

"Yeah," Jungkook replied, grabbing a couple bottles and cups off the counter. "This is my friend Seokjin's house."

"Is he here?" You asked, looking around. "Shouldn't you let him know you're here?"

"Nah," Jungkook replied, opening the bottle of vodka. "He's floating around, we'll run into each other eventually! Here!" He handed you a cup with a smile. "Drink up!"

Though you didn't like to drink too much, you did do it on occasion. You tipped the cup back to take a quick swig, noting the cranberry juice Jungkook had mixed in to help it go down easier.

"Jungkook!" Someone called, squeezing between the two of you. It was a guy a bit shorter than Jungkook. "I knew you would come!"

"You know I don't miss Jin's parties," Jungkook laughed, meeting your gaze of the friend's shoulder. "Oh this is my date, _____."

You flushed hearing Jungkook so openly call you his date, unashamed as he motioned to you. The person turned around and you quickly recognized him as Park Jimin — a friend of Taehyung's.

"Oh well hello _____! Didn't expect to see you at this little get together," Jimin grinned. His charming quality making you smile. "I hope you don't mind if I borrow Jungkook real quick?"

"Um..." You shrugged and glanced over at Jungkook.

"Yeah I'll be back, sweetheart," Jungkook patted your back as he passed you, his touch lingering on your lower back as he did so. The touch sent tingles down your spine and you watched him disappear in the crowd with Jimin. And like that you were alone.

You had finished half of the drink Jungkook made you when someone's hand dropped on your shoulder, making you jump. You turned around and found yourself face to face with Taehyung.

"What-Hey," You greeted awkwardly, not expecting to see him.

"What're you doing here?" He asked, frowning as he looked over you.

"Um well," You shifted awkwardly on your feet. "I came here with...Jungkook."

Taehyung was silent for a moment, frown still in place as he blinked at you. Slowly, he opened his mouth, as if thinking over what he was going to say.

"Does Hoseok know?" He asked. "That you're even talking to him?"

"Well, no," You admitted, swirling your cup to watch the liquid slosh around. "_____," Taehyung sighed, warning in his tone. "Hoseok wouldn't like this, you know he doesn't want you fuckin' around with him."

"I know," You admitted, watching as he suddenly poured himself a cup of straight vodka and threw it back, downing it. "How did you find me anyway?"

"Jimin told me you were here," Taehyung said, pouring himself another drink quickly.

You fell silent, watching Taehyung chug another drink. Within minutes, you could tell they were kicking in and he placed his hand on your shoulder.

"I'm going to assume you can take care of yourself," He said. "I'm going to go find someone to get laid. But remember, ______, be careful of Jungkook."

"Yeah, so I keep being told..." You muttered as he walked away, quickly disappearing and leaving you alone again.

All by yourself, you watched people walk in and out to get drinks. As the minutes ticked by, you found yourself wanting to go home. You weren't drunk, you could call a cab since Jungkook drove you.

Finally, you wandered out of the kitchen into the living area where people were dancing and shouting over the music. You mingled in the corner, keeping to yourself and sipping on your drink that you still hadn't finished.

"Well hey there," Someone greeted beside you. You turned to find a man with sharp, cat-like eyes staring at you as he leaned against the wall clad in a leather jacket and ripped black jeans.

"Hi," You greeted bashfully.

"You all by yourself?" He asked, smiling softly. You nodded and shrugged your shoulders in response, unsure of what he wanted. "Well, you're too cute to be by yourself. How about I keep you company. I'm Yoongi. Min Yoongi."

"Your name sounds familiar," You muttered.

"Well, a lot of people know me," He had a gummy grin that was actually quite cute. Despite the fact you could tell he was a little drunk, he still smelled quite pleasantly of cologne.

"I'm ______," You introduced with a polite smile, holding your hand out for him to shake.

"Well, ______," He stood up straighter, taking your hand firmly in his. "I'm gonna be real honest with you. I think you are absolutely stunning and truthfully, I'm looking to get la-"

"Yoongi, what're you doing?" A familiar voice had Yoongi freezing immediately, turning to look over his shoulder.

"Ah, Jungkook!" He greeted happily, as if Jungkook wasn't glaring daggers at him. "Fancy seeing you here. I was just about to ask this lovely young lady to go up—"

"Can I talk to you for a minute?" Jungkook growled, cutting Yoongi off again by grabbing his arm and tugging him away.

They didn't go far and you could see Jungkook leaned in close to say something to Yoongi. Immediately, the shorter man's mouth fell open at the same time his eyes widened.

"No shit!" Yoongi shouted. "She's yours? Ah, sorry man. I got it."

Jungkook seemed to visibly relax as Yoongi waved goodbye to you and disappeared as quickly as he reappeared. Jungkook walked back over to you with a smile — no sign of the glare he once nursed towards his friend.

"I'm sorry for disappearing," He said. "I won't do it again. I just got caught up. Namjoon was doin' some shit, it's not important. I won't bail again, I promise."

"Why don't I believe that one?" You scoffed, taking a sip of your drink. Your own words sounded like a petulant, needy girlfriend and you mentally cringed. But Jungkook didn't seem to mind, keeping that small smile on his lips. He no doubt could sense your disappointment with his vanishing.

"Come with me," He said, taking your hand.

He didn't give you much of a choice as he tugged you through the crowd. You met the stairs and you realized he was bringing you somewhere away from the party. From your knowledge, that usually indicated he was expecting to have sex. Your heart sped up as you found yourself in the hallway, several of the doors shut and a couple open. The music was much quieter and you could hear the faint sounds of moaning every once in a while, making your cheeks burn.

As Jungkook stopped in front of a door, your mind was racing with ways to tell Jungkook that you were a virgin and certainly didn't want to lose it at a party. But as he opened the door, you were surprised to see it wasn't a bedroom at all. It had a few bean bag chairs, a small couch, and a large screen TV with a shelf of movies.

"Ah, good, it's empty," Jungkook chuckled, ushering you inside as he followed, closing the door behind you and flicking the lock. "People are learning finally!" "Learning what?" You asked as you sat down on the couch.

"This room is basically off limits to anyone who isn't a personal friend of Kim Seokjin's," Jungkook explained, grabbing the remote of the DVD shelf. "We hang out in here to escape the parties sometimes."

"Sometimes people come in here anyway?" You asked, watching as the TV came to life.

"Yeah, we kick them out if they do and slowly people began to learn," He said, bringing up Netflix.

Briefly, the phrase, Netflix and Chill popped in your mind but you shook it away as Jungkook pulled a blanket off the back of the couch and placed it over the two of you.

The alcohol you were drinking throughout the evening was finally beginning to kick in even though you'd stopped drinking. Jungkook, on the other hand, was continuing to drink out of his cup. He also pulled open a cabinet next to the TV which held an array of alcohol that was otherwise unavailable to the other partiers.

You had no idea how much he'd had but about halfway through The Day After Tomorrow, he was showing his buzz. His words were slurred and slow and he was clearly very relaxed, resting his arm around your shoulder shamelessly.

"Hey _____?" He suddenly asked, drawing your attention away from the movie.

You noticed how close your faces were, you could feel his breath fanning across your face. It smelled like alcohol but you assumed yours did too.

"What?" You asked, eyes flicking from his eyes to his lips.

"Can I kiss you?" He asked, slowly beginning to lean in before you could even process his words. He did, however, pause before he met your lips, waiting for your consent.

"Y-Yeah," You whispered, holding your breath as he finally closed the gap and kissed you.

His hand came up, cupping your cheek as his lips moved expertly against yours. You'd only had a few kisses in your lifetime but you knew right away that he was the best.

He pulled away, smiling as his thumb stroked the soft skin of your cheek. It surprised you how it wasn't awkward in any way. Jungkook really had a knack for making you feel comfortable. The way he looked at you made your heart race, his eyes sparkled as if you were an angel.

Before long, the alcohol had finally kicked in to Jungkook's system and you convinced him that it was time to go home. He was way too drunk to drive and you really didn't have any clue what dorm he lived in. So, you decided to just take him to your apartment.

He was alert enough to walk on his own, but he kept cracking jokes and having to stop because he began to laugh too hard.

"You really are so pretty," He cooed when he leaned against your wall, watching as you unlocked your door. "How on Earth did I manage to snag you?"

It was drunk ramblings but his words still set your heart on fire.

"You can crash on the couch, Jungkook," You said. "It pulls out into a bed so I'll do that for you."

Jungkook hummed, eyes not leaving your form as you moved the cushion until you could pull the bed out. Immediately, he crashed down onto it without a care and smiled happily.

"I'll see you in the morning, Jungkook," You smiled, patting his head before flicking out the lights and retiring to your room.

It felt like you were only sleeping for a few minutes before there were a series of light taps against your door. You groaned until your pillow as you were pulled from the gentle lull of sleep.

Sitting up, you looked towards the door before calling for them to come in, knowing it could only be one person.

He crept his way in, the light from the hallway casting his shadow across your floor.

"Are you okay, Jungkook?" You asked, rubbing the sleep away from your eyes so you could focus on him better.

"Yeah, I..." He cleared his throat and shifted where he stood. You could tell his drunken stupor had fizzled into quiet sobriety. "I just want to thank you."

"What for?" You asked, watching as he took a couple strides forward until he was close enough to touch.

"It's just..." He smiled. "You're so sweet and you're so kind, you even let me crash here even after I dragged you to a stupid party you didn't even want to go to."

"How did you know—"

"You're clearly not the party type," He chuckled. "I can tell. But you still went with me and..." He trailed off, unsure of what to add.

"And what?" You pressed, tangling your hand in your blanket in an effort to keep yourself from touching him.

"I think I like you," He shook his head quickly. "I know I like you. I do, _____." You couldn't believe your ears.

Jeon Jungkook, the man who slept around with anything that had a pulse and was impossible to nail down, liked you? The man women tried, time and time again, who was notorious for never even developing feelings...had a crush on you?

"I..." You shifted to sit on your knees so you could reach his height. "I like you too, Jungkook. I've had such a great time with you and...I really feel lucky that you chose me."

"Of course I did," He smiled, combing his fingers through your hair. You leaned into his touch, eyes flicking to his lips with a sudden urge to kiss him. "You're an...incredible woman."

“Jungkook…” You whispered, getting lost in the way his eyes sparkled even in the dim light.

Before you could even think of stopping yourself, you surged forward and pressed your lips against his. He tasted vaguely like the alcohol he’d consumed hours earlier. You whimpered, clutching the front of his shirt in your fists as if he would slip away if you let him go.

His hands gripped your hips, your body being pressed into his at the motion. As your lips moved together flawlessly, you wrapped your arms around his neck to thread your fingers through his hair. Your heart skipped a beat in your chest when you felt him lightly grinding his hardening length against your stomach. Suddenly, he pulled back from the kiss — lips swollen and chest heaving as he caught his breath.

“A-Are you sure you want to do this?” He asked, brushing his nose against yours as he pecked your lips softly once again.

“Y-Yes please,” You whimpered, tugging his shirt to pull him onto the bed.

You laid back as he climbed on top of you, balancing his weight on his hands on either side of your head. He looked so delectable, eyes dark and pierced lip caught between his perfect teeth.

“This is your first time, right?” He asked softly, leaning down to rest his forehead against yours as you nodded. “Don’t worry, baby, I’ll take care of you.”

A cocky smirk crossed his lips as he sat up, reaching down to tug the hem of his shirt over his head. Your breath caught in your throat at the sight; his body was toned and it was clear he worked out judging by the muscles adorning his body.

His hands travelled up your calves and across your bare thighs. Goosebumps prickled the skin in the wake of his touch as he skimmed over your shorts to sneak up the hem of your shirt. His fingers were soft as they touched the smooth skin of your stomach.

He leaned down and met your lips in another searing kiss as his hand finally cupped your bare breast. He thumbed at your nipple, making you whimper into the kiss and arch your back. Pinching your nipple, he smirked at the way you gasped and closed your legs tightly around his waist in an effort to ease the tension growing between them. Taking your squirming and whining as a good sign, he worked your shirt above your head.

You let him, panting beneath him as he threw the clothing away — leaving your breasts exposed to him. Immediately, he was showering them with attention as he cupped them and pinched your perked buds before his mouth enveloped one into his hot mouth.

You cried out, tugging at his hair as his tongue made an appearance — a foreign object brushing against your nipple.

“J-Jungkook!” You gasped, biting your lip to hold in the embarrassing noises that wanted desperately to escape.

He popped off your bud with another smirk. “You like that?”

“Y-Your tongue it’s…” You trailed off.

“Pierced,” He completed your thought, sticking his tongue out to show off the silver ball situated on it. “Yeah and it can feel a lot better on your little cunt than your pretty tits.”

You flushed at his dirty words but couldn’t deny the way you gushed into your panties. He chuckled darkly, no doubt catching onto your thoughts.

“Do you want that?” He asked which you immediately nodded, not even bothering to hesitate.

He hooked his fingers into the band of your shorts and panties, tugging them both down. Perhaps there was still a bit of a buzz in your system because you couldn’t find it in yourself to be embarrassed. You felt needy, your cunt dripping wet because of him — and he’d barely done anything.

He scooted down the bed until his head was between your thighs. He pushed your knees open, eyes falling to your pussy. You watched as he licked his lips, using his thumbs to spread your folds apart so your twitching hole was exposed to him.

“Kook…” You whimpered, embarrassment catching up to you finally the longer he stared at your cunt.

“So pretty baby,” He whispered, pressing a kiss to your thigh. “So wet and ready for me. Can’t wait to sink my cock in this tight little cunt.” “P-Please, Jungkook,” You whimpered, arching your hips towards him as his dirty words made you gush.

“Good girl, so polite,” He grinned, before he dove in and licked a thick strip up your cunt — collecting your juices on his tongue with a moan. His tongue ring grazed your clit, making your back arch.

He gripped your hips, anchoring you in place as he began to eat you like a man starved. He was sloppy and wet, letting your juices and his saliva drip down his chin. The moans he let out were sinful, as if eating your cunt was the best delicacy he ever tasted.

You gripped his hair and the sheets, needing something to ground yourself through the overwhelming pleasure. He sucked on your clit, lashing at the sensitive bud with his tongue until you were trembling beneath him.

Suddenly he pulled his face away, his lips and chin soaked with a mixture of your juices and saliva. His gaze was dark and he was breathing heavily — arousal weighing down his very being. You whined at the loss when he sat up, wiping his mouth quickly before he began to pull at his belt.

“Fuck, you got me so hard,” He growled. “Got my cock so hard. Your little cunt gets so wet, doesn’t it?”

“Jungkook…” You whined, sitting up as he pushed his jeans down to reveal he wasn’t wearing any underwear beneath them.

“What is it, baby?” He asked, wrapping his fist loosely around himself with a sigh of relief.

“Can I…” You cleared your throat, averting your gaze from his as his eyes burned into you. “Can you...teach me how to…”

“How to what?” He asked, reaching forward to brush some hair out of your face. ”How to suck my cock?”

“Y-Yes…” You whispered, swallowing thickly.

“Fuck,” He breathed, nodding his head as he fisted your hair. You whimpered, allowing him to drag your face closer to his cock. “Open your mouth.”

You did as you were told, allowing your mouth to fall open. Jungkook’s own mouth fell open as your mouth enveloped the hot head of his cock. You closed your lips around him, swirling your tongue on the tip of him. The taste of his precum on your tongue made your cunt clench pathetically.

Jungkook groaned, eyes rolling back. “Take me a bit deeper. You’ll probably have a bad gag reflex but we’ll work on that.”

Your heart fluttered at the promise of seeing him again and allowing him to teach you new and exciting things. Doing as he told you, you took him as deep as you comfortably could. He felt hot and heavy on your tongue, hard as steel with a thick pulsing vein on the underside but velvet soft skin.

Jungkook cupped the back of your head, leading you in the proper motions of sucking him off. With every pulse of his cock, more of his precum danced along your tastebuds.

Then with a defeated groan, he pulled out — wrapping his fist tightly around himself.

“Don’t wanna cum in that dirty mouth,” He growled, letting go of your hair to let you lay back down.

“Please Jungkook,” You whined, wrapping your arms around him to pull him into a kiss.

“Fuck,” He growled, spreading your thighs over his so your cunt was open for the thick head of his cock.

You held your breath as he positioned himself at your entrance. You were wet enough for him to slide in with ease, the stretch stinging but not unbearable. He stopped to let you adjust, his body trembling as your cunt spasmed around him.

Once he felt you relax beneath him, he pulled back — a long gasp escaping you as he did so before being cut off when he slammed himself back. His hips slapped against yours as he leaned over to kiss you once again. Every gasp and whine you let out was captured in his mouth, which he eagerly swallowed down.

He set a soft pace, not wanting to be too rough for your first time. The idea that his cock was the first in your pussy had him throbbing, on the verge of cumming. It was almost pathetic how quickly the idea of stuffing your virgin cunt set him off.

“J-Jungkook!” You sobbed, digging your nails into his back. “F-Feels so good.” “Yeah?” He growled, angling his hips to hit your g-spot with terrifying accuracy. “You’re so tight. Wanna make you cum…”

As soon as the words left his lips, he was bringing his thumb to his lips, wetting it with his tongue before circling your hardened clit in time with his thrusts. Your eyes rolled back in your head as you sobbed out in pleasure, trembling beneath him as you were pushed closer and closer to the delicious release you were desperate for.

Jungkook let out a series of soft curses as you tightened impossibly around him as you came, walls clamping and spasming in the throes of your pleasure. He didn’t slow or stop until you were sobbing and pushing his hand away from your sensitive bud.

One glance at the blissful, fucked out look in your eyes was enough to send him over the edge as well. He pulled out, making you whimper at the loss before wrapping his hand around his cock and jerking himself until he came in hot ribbons across your stomach. It dripped down to your cunt and he had to urge to use his fingers to stuff it into you but fought it.

The two of you sat in silence for a second, catching your breath before he stood up and grabbed your shirt from the floor to clean up his cum. You didn’t mind, the soft material also wiping away the sweat that had built up over your skin.

After a moment, Jungkook laid beside you, taking you into his arms with a sigh. “You owe me breakfast,” You mumbled sleepily.

“Huh?” He replied.

“In the morning,” You whispered. “Take me for breakfast before class?”

Jungkook was silence for several long seconds, opening his mouth before closing it again as he decided what to say before settling on “Y...Yeah.”

His response was the last thing you heard as you finally fell asleep with his warmth around you and his heart pounding in his chest against your ear.

Your eyes fluttered open and the first thing you noticed was the bright sunlight filtering through the window. You blinked sleepily, waiting for yourself to wake up a bit more.

The second thing you noticed was the soreness of your body, it felt like you had a touch workout the day before but it was a pleasant feeling. You rolled over onto your back, noting the way your stomach was starting to growl with hunger.

The memory of the promise of a nice breakfast date made you smile and you looked beside you only to be met with an empty bed. Sitting up, you touched to sheets, they were cold. He'd been gone for a while.

You grabbed your phone off the night table, noting you would have to go to class soon, and brought up Jungkook's contact.

To: Jeon Jungkook [11:22AM] Where are you?

You waited for several seconds, watching as it tried to send. Your heart began to speed up in your chest when you realized it couldn't be delivered.

As you stared at your screen, your alarm began to ring indicating you had to get up for class.

It was difficult to get ready as you kept checking your phone to see if your text got delivered. Every time you did, you were only disappointed.

You went to class with a dull ache in your chest.

As you walked across campus towards the cafe, you heard rowdy laughter, drawing your attention to a group of men. In the center, being playfully shoved by his friends was Jungkook. Adjusting your bag on your shoulder, you made a beeline for him.

"Jungkook!" You called, watching as all five men stopped and turned their attention to you. "Where did you go this morning?"

There was a beat of silence before Jungkook let out a big sigh and shook his head.

"Come on guys," He said.

As he passed you, not even casting a single glance at you, you got a whiff of his sweet perfume and tears filled your eyes. His friends let out soft snickers and whispers you couldn't make out, leaving you there feeling humiliated.

You realized immediately you had been a complete fool the entire time.

Shaking your head, you decided going to class was the last thing you wanted to do. You skipped and trekked the familiar path to your close friends dorm.

Knocking harshly on the door, as the doorbell was broken, you bit the inside of your cheek to stop yourself from crying. The lock on the door clicked and then Hoseok's face came into view.

"Hey, what're you doing here?" He asked, running a hand through his wet hair. He must have just gotten out of the shower, you noted. "What's the matter?" He quickly asked, noticing immediate that you were upset.

"I'm an idiot is what's wrong," Your voice came out a harsh whisper as your throat felt too tight from holding back your tears.

Hoseok looked behind you and down the halls before pulling you inside his dorm. Locking the door, he turned back to you to find tears falling down your cheeks.

"What happened?" He asked, leading you to sit beside him on his couch.

"You were right," You nodded, sniffling softly. "I should have stayed away from him."

"From who?" He asked, brows furrowed.

"Jungkook," You spat his name.

"Oh..." He sighed, jaw locking. "Taehyung mentioned you were with him at the party..."

"I'm sorry, Hoseok," You cried. "I know you told me to stay away but...I didn't think he was really that bad."

He sighed, pulling you in for a hug. "It's alright, he's a charming bastard. I understand why you would end up liking him."

That day, Hoseok also skipped work to hang out with you and cheer you up. He even invited Taehyung over after he got done with class.

"Where the hell is he?" Hoseok complained, watching the hours tick by as Taehyung was later and later than his promised arrival time.

"Hopefully he's picking up food," You called from the kitchen as you looked through his barren fridge. "How do you not starve?"

"I eat out mostly!" He called back.

You were about to open your mouth to tell him how unhealthy h is diet was when the door opened and slammed shut. Wandering into the living area, you saw Taehyung huffing as he kicked his shoes off.

"You alright Tae?" Hoseok asked, brow raised.

"I am never speaking to Park Jimin again!" Taehyung growled, storming past you into the kitchen where he opened the fridge and groaned. "Why haven't you got any fuckin' food?!"

"He eats out," You replied, chuckling softly when Taehyung threw his head back and groaned obnoxiously.

"Why aren't you friends with Jimin anymore?" Hoseok asked as the two of you wandered in and took a seat around him.

"Because he's a scumbag along with that Jeon Jungkook fucker!" Taehyung snapped, grabbing Hoseok's beer can off the table and taking a few sips. The eldest didn't complain, simply watched and waited for Taehyung to continue.

"Care to share with the class?" Hoseok asked. Your eyes were fixed on Taehyung, waiting eagerly for any word on Jungkook. Maybe an explanation since you couldn't get one from him — judging by the fact he'd blocked your number.

"Apparently," Taehyung huffed. "Jungkook had called dibs on ______ to get her to sleep with him," You gasped at the admission. "Jimin knows you're one of my best friends and he didn't even think of telling me that Jungkook was gonna fuck with you like that! What kind of bullshit is that?"

"What are they, in high school?" Hoseok growled. "Claiming girls like that, what the fuck, man."

"I'm sorry, _____," Taehyung mumbled, standing up to bring you in for a hug. "I know you liked him."

"It's okay," You whispered, fighting back tears again. "It was my fault for being tricked."

"It's not your—"

"It is though," You sighed. "I was stupid. I knew the stories and reputation he had. Hoseok even warned me. I have only myself to blame," There was a beat of silence as Hoseok and Taehyung shared a look. "How about we watch a movie, huh?"

Like that, the topic dissipated and it wasn't brought up again.

When Im Changkyun approached you, cheeks dusted a cute pink, you were charmed immediately. You didn't know much about him, he was a new transfer but he was kind and funny so you agreed to the date.

It wasn't until a month into your new relationship that you realized you apparently attracted douchebags. You found out, stupidly, that he'd been cheating on you.

You fumed just thinking about it; he'd texted you a risque text while drunk but it wasn't meant for you.

The second he was sober, you dumped him and found yourself watching movies with Taehyung and Hoseok once again to cure your heartbreak.

"I'm never dating again," You whined, slouched on the loveseat wrapped in Hoseok's favorite blanket that you loved to steal. He wouldn't tell you where he got it so you hijacked it whenever you were at his house.

"Don't be dramatic," Hoseok chuckled from where he sat beside Taehyung. "I'm serious! Almost all men are trash and I'm tired of it!" You whined, eyes fixed on the TV.

"Holy shit..." Taehyung suddenly whispered, sitting up straight, where he sat. "What?" Hoseok and you asked at the same time.

"Im Changkyun and Jeon Jungkook got into a fight," The three of you immediately fell silent.

"...Why?" You asked, suspicious that your two exes had beefed.

"Um, well..." Taehyung shifted nervously, seemingly not wanted to reveal the reason.

Hoseok, suspecting such as well, yanked his phone from his hands — ignoring the argumentative cry that came from the younger.

"Because Jungkook..." Hoseok's jaw fell open in surprise, making you finally sit up fully.

"What? What?!" You cried. "Tell me!"

Taehyung stole his phone back from Hoseok and stuffed it in his pocket with a sigh.

"Because Jungkook found out Changkyun cheated on you!" They both told you at the same time.

You were frozen still, brows furrowed as you attempted to process that information. A litany of questions clouded your thoughts but the main one was; why did Jungkook even care?

Later, when you had just stepped into your apartment and kicked off your shoes, your phone buzzed. Sighing, you pulled it out, hoping you wouldn't have to go back to Hoseok's for something.

What you saw, however, made your heart race.

From: Jungkook [8:19PM] Can we talk?

© httpjeon 2019. do not repost or modify.

[milkybonya]

awkward confession

Warnings: food mentions

Pairing: college senior!Jinhwan x shy (gender neutral) reader

Summary: over reading week, you invite Jinhwan to your home and as he looks around your childhood room, he stumbles across a journal of yours.

Word count: idk but i think it’s over 1k? it’s a longer one :o

[a/n]: after playing superstar yg, i’ve been feeling soft for Jinhwan? i know, even i’m surprised by the correlation LOL but enjoy this~

- prologue

You first met Jinhwan in your freshman year at a party, dragged there by your newfound friends who claimed that it would be fun, but you just wanted to go home. 

After an hour, you decided you couldn’t take it anymore. Saying goodbye to your friends, you grabbed your jacket and stepped outside, clueless about how to get back to campus and to your dorm.

Opening google maps on your phone, you tapped your foot impatiently, waiting for it to load. Your phone was at 1%, but maybe if you could just get a glimpse-

It died.

Throwing it into your pocket, you sighed and stared up at the black sky.

“Heading home?” someone asked you.

You turned your head to the side and saw Jinhwan standing next to you, with his hands in the pockets of his jean jacket. 

“Yeah, but my phone just died,” you said, pressing your lips together to contain your anger.

“Want me to drive you?” he asked, waving his car keys around. “My car is new but I’ve had my license for a long time, so no need to worry.”

You laughed at his comment and decided to accept the offer, since you knew he was your senior and you could trust him. The week before classes started, you had been told about a few of the seniors in your program at orientation, and Jinhwan had been one of them. Apparently, he was very kind and laid-back.

Before you entered his car, he formally introduced himself and you did the same. When you were inside, he passed you the aux cord but then stopped.

“Right! Your phone is dead. Here, take mine! Just search through Spotify and play whatever you like.”

“I’m not sure if you’ll like it, though..” you said, hesitating. Sharing your music with someone else was always a bit embarrassing for you.

“As long as it’s not Kids Bop, then I’m sure I won’t mind,” he said, starting to drive.

“What if I play death metal?” you said.

“Fine by me,” he said.

You found an artist that you liked and started playing their songs. Jinhwan smiled and nodded his head along to the beat, making you feel more comfortable.

“Oh, you might as well save your number in there while you’re at it, or save my number. If you ever need help with anything, you can contact me!”

You added yourself to his contacts and sent yourself a message from his phone so you would also have his number. In his phone, you saved your name as ‘[y/n] :)’.

“Which dorm are you in?” he asked.

“The one behind the library,” you said.

“Ah, that’s the worst spot. Hey, we actually have a free spot in our student home if you ever want to join us. Although I don’t want to make you live with your scary seniors if it makes you uncomfortable,” Jinhwan said, jokingly.

“Thanks for the offer, but I don’t want to intrude.”

“It wouldn’t be intruding, don’t worry! But just do whatever is most comfortable for you. You can always crash at our place when you get tired of your dorm.”

As you passed an ice cream shop that was near campus, you found yourself sighing. Some late night ice cream would really hit the spot right now...

When Jinhwan asked why you were sighing, you confided your thoughts and without any hesitation, he turned the car around and stopped right in front of the ice cream place.

“I’ll get you whatever you like, my treat!” he said, hopping out.

When you chose the ice cream you wanted, Jinhwan also chose one for himself and paid for both of you. You grabbed a seat by the window right next to the glass door. There was arcade music echoing throughout the tiny place, since there were a few arcade machines behind you.

“This is so good!” you said, eating your ice cream.

“Have you never been here before?” Jinhwan asked you, smiling. This whole time he had not stopped smiling at you, and it made you feel warm inside.

“I’ve always wanted to, but this first month of classes has been super stressful.”

“I hear you, but it’s important to take breaks! If you’re ever stressed, you can let me know and we can come back here,” he said.

Jinhwan had been nothing but unusually nice to you, but you didn’t think much of it. A lot of the seniors were nice to the freshman and juniors anyway.

After you finished your ice cream, Jinhwan dropped you off at your dorm. Even though he watched you walk in, he still texted you right as you reached your room.

hello ‘[y/n] :)’ did you get in safely?

yes, thank u! you literally watched me walk in lol

that’s right, but who knows what can happen on your way to your room from the front doors of the dorm

i appreciate you :)

do you like smiley faces? u even saved ur name as ‘[y/n] :)’

ah, i guess i do like them ><

that’s cute~

Your heart fluttered seeing this message, and you had to take a few deep breaths to calm down. He’s just my senior, you told yourself. He’s just being nice.

-

A few days later, you saw Jinhwan in the library, studying. You thought that you should say hello out of courtesy, but you didn’t want to bother him, so you continued to walk along the shelves in search of the book you needed.

Getting distracted, you ended up with five big textbooks in your arms. You couldn’t help it, they were all so interesting...

Trying to reach for a book while your hands were still full, suddenly everything fell. The sound of the books falling to the ground echoed throughout the library, and you apologized under your breath as you struggled to pick everything up. You felt so embarrassed that you wanted to disappear.

Looking up amidst your struggle, you saw Jinhwan looking at you from his spot. When he recognized you, he immediately rushed over.

Did this happen to me because I didn’t say hi to him, you thought. Is this karma?

“[y/n], it’s you? Are you okay? Let me help you,” he said, taking some of the books from your arms.

“These are really heavy, you should get a cart for them.” Jinhwan moved his head around to search for one.

“No, it’s fine! I grabbed too many anyway! I’ll just put them back-” you said, not wanting to bother Jinhwan anymore. But he firmly held onto your books until he found a cart.

“I know where some better books on this topic are. Do you want me to show them to you?” Jinhwan asked you, placing the books on the cart.

“No, really, it’s fine! You’re busy studying-”

“I need a break anyway~” he quietly sang, walking towards the spot that he told you about. Forced to follow him, you trailed along. He had a skip in his step, and it made you smile.

“I’m really sorry, I know midterms must be starting for you-”

He stopped and turned around.

“[y/n], it’s really fine! I wouldn’t help you if I didn’t want to,” he said.

After he showed you the books that he was talking about, he invited you to join him at his spot to study.

“Ah, right! You treated me for ice cream last time. Do you want anything to drink? I can buy you something!” you said.

Jinhwan chuckled. 

“There’s no need for that! I already have a coffee here,” he said, pointing to the coffee next to him.

“What about a muffin! A cookie?” you asked.

He laughed, again.

“Okay, you can get me something if you really want to. But the muffins here are terrible, so go for a cookie instead!” he told you.

When you returned with some chocolate chip cookies, he took them from you with a wink. He let you have some too, claiming that you needed fuel to study.

While you were deep into one of the books you were reading and taking notes on a sticky note, you finally looked down to write something and found a smiley face on the corner of your sticky note. Not remembering drawing that, you looked up at Jinhwan, but he was also busy studying. It had to be him, you thought.

You picked up your pen and finding a free spot in the margin of his notebook, doodled a fox carefully.

A few minutes after you returned to your own work, he asked, “well I wonder where this fox came from?”

“Well I wonder where this smiley face came from?” you asked him, pointing to the smiley face on your sticky note. The two of you laughed quietly.

-

Some time after that, your roommate declared that they wanted to start getting fit.

“You’re literally saying that as you’re finishing a whole tub of ice cream,” you said, laughing.

Your roommate dropped the tub and stood up with their fist raised.

“We are going to the gym, right now!”

With no escape, you followed your friend to the campus gym and signed up for a membership. As you were doing so, you heard a familiar voice.

“I don’t want to! Why do we all have to sign up? This is so annoying.”

Jinhwan?

As you turned around, your suspicions were confirmed. He was being pushed by his roommates, your other program seniors, towards the front desk which you were stood at, and he was whining loudly like a baby.

“Oh, it’s [y/n]!” one of the seniors, named Junhoe, who was pushing him said. Upon hearing your name, Jinhwan stood up straight and laughed awkwardly, waving hello.

“[y/n], we all promised we would sign up for the gym since our program’s marathon is coming up and this fool,” Hanbin, another senior, said while pointing to Jinhwan, “signed us up for it. But now he doesn’t want to work out with us!”

You laughed. How cute, you thought.

Jinhwan stood there, scratching the back of his head.

“Actually, my roommate is making me sign up, too. So I guess we’re in the same boat!”

“See, if [y/n] can do it then so can you!” Bobby, another senior, said.

With both of you being forced to sign up, you made your way into the gym. Your roommate dragged you aside for a second.

“Who’s Jinhwan and how do you know him and-”

“He’s my senior,” you said, cutting your roommate off before they asked too many questions.

“That’s it?”

“That’s it.”

Your roommate analyzed your face.

“Are you sure?” they asked, narrowing their eyes.

“Yes!” you screamed. Jinhwan and his friends all looked at you and you pressed your lips together out of embarrassment.

“Look what you made me do!” you said to your roommate, who was walking ahead while laughing loudly.

-

When the marathon that only the upper years were supposed to participate in finally rolled around, you stood at the finish line, handing out water to everyone who finished. The marathon was to raise money for your program, since it was not funded so well.

You cheered all of your seniors on under the hot sun, fanning yourself to try to cool down. I could just... take one water bottle... no! It’s for the seniors and we don’t have enough!

As you struggled to decide between drinking one of the waters secretly or leaving them for your seniors, a sweaty Jinhwan finally crossed the finish line.

He looked extremely tired, so you grabbed a bottle of water and a towel before running up to him.

“You did it! Good job!” you said, handing him the supplies that you had grabbed.

He was bent over with his hands on his knees, but straightened up to take the water from your hands. But he hesitated before handing it back to you.

“It’s fine, you should drink it,” he panted. He reached for a hat that he had managed to tie to his waist, and handed that to you, too.

“You should wear a hat in this weather! Be careful,” he said, placing the cap on your head before walking away. Confused, you trailed back to the water station that you were stood at.

“Didn’t he give you the water? Drink it then! And give me some too!” your friend, who was also manning the water station with you, said.

You watched Jinhwan as he lay sprawled out in the grass.

This won’t do.

Handing the bottle to your friend, you ran towards the closest building in search of a vending machine. Finding one, you bought a water and ran back to hand it to Jinhwan, who was still sprawled out in the grass.

Panting, you crashed on the grass next to him and handed him the bottle. He sat up, eyeing it,

“But I just gave my water to you-”

“Drink it!” you said breathlessly before lying down in the grass next to him.

You heard him taking big gulps before he also laid down next to you and right then in that moment, you asked yourself why you ran for ten minutes just to buy bottled water for Jinhwan.

When you looked up at him and watched the sun light up his face, showing his skin sticky with sweat and his hair a mess, you felt like something was welling up inside you.

You liked Jinhwan.

-

During finals week, you vowed that you were going to sit in the same library cubicle for the entire week to study. No leaving. No getting distracted. You would only leave to use the washroom, wash your face, take a shower, eat or brush your teeth. Otherwise, you were sleeping in there.

Intense, but you needed to do what you had to do to study.

Your exams were later than everyone else’s, so while everyone else was enjoying their Winter break, you were still studying.

Thud.

You looked up after you had buried your head in your books to find your favourite vending machine drink sitting next to your laptop. Confused and wondering if this was a hallucination, you looked around for who might have left it there.

“Boo!” Jinhwan said from the cubicle next to you.

You jumped up in fright, yelling at him for scaring you.

Then you got scolded by a librarian and Jinhwan laughed.

“Seriously, I’m doing some major studying right now! No distractions!” you told Jinhwan.

“Is that your way of saying thanks?”

“Thank you,” you groaned.

“You’re really something. I’ve never studied this hard for my exams,” Jinhwan said.

“Well that’s your problem, not mine!” you said, sticking out your tongue at him.

Since your first encounter, you had been seeing Jinhwan more often around campus and felt a lot more comfortable around him.

“What? Is that how you treat your senior?” Jinhwan joked. “Anyway, I’m here to wish you good luck! And remind you to take breaks. Speaking of which, do you wanna go grab ice cream? Go for a walk?”

“Go for a walk? Am I your dog?” you scoffed.

Jinhwan sighed.

“You know what I mean!”

You ended up leaving your cubicle for an hour to walk through campus with Jinhwan. The night air was cold but refreshing, and there was something calming about the empty campus with the few streetlights lighting the way. You almost tripped and fell onto Jinhwan a few times because it was so dark, but each time he caught you and giggled softly in a way that made you want to squeal because he was so. damn. cute.

-

A year later

-

“IT’S READING WEEK!” your roommate yelled as they packed their suit case.

“Yay,” you said, quietly.

“Yay? We’re going home! What is this sad reaction?”

“Going home means a week without Jinhwan...”

Your roommate groaned.

“Are you kidding me? You went a whole summer break without him, what is this?

“Yeah, and it was terrible!” you said.

“You two need to stop beating around the bush and start dating already.”

“WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?” you yelled.

“WHAT ARE YOU SAYING? It’s been two years of you liking each other! Just kiss, jeez!”

“This is a sad unrequited love and you cannot convince me otherwise.”

“[y/n]... I’m not even gonna bother. I’m done. I’m not gonna say anything!” your roommate said, walking to the bathroom.

Two seconds later, they walked back in.

“DO YOU NOT SEE the way this man looks at you? He’s always so nice to you and for what? You’re not a freshman anymore!”

“We’re friends!”

“This is pathetic! I’m gonna have to get the ball rolling myself,” your friend said, grabbing your phone.

Their grip was too strong, so you only got a hold of your phone after they let go. Your messages app was open. Your chat with Jinhwan was open. Oh no.

Jinhwan! do u want to stay at my house for reading week? :)

“WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!” you yelled, throwing a pillow at your roommate who laughed in response.

“I’m doing God’s work!”

Your phone vibrated and your heart raced.

really? i’d love to! my family wanted me to help out with home renovations T.T and i’d rather spend reading week with u~

“He agreed,” you said, surprised. “HE AGREED!”

-

“And this is my house,” you said, opening the door and letting Jinhwan enter first.

“Woah,” he said, looking around.

“There isn’t much, really...”

“I wanna see your room,” Jinhwan said, kicking off his shoes and immediately walking upstairs.

“Wait!” you said, running after him.

“I can really tell which one is yours,” he said, chuckling as he found your room.

As he looked around, you felt super embarrassed, so you told him that you would be downstairs unpacking.

A few minutes later, Jinhwan walked up to you downstairs, holding something in his hand. His face was red and there was a smile on his face.

“[y/n], please explain this,” he said, handing you what he was holding.

It was your journal.

And it was opened to a page where you had written about your feeling for Jinhwan.

You had forgotten all about this.

Oh no.

You had written all about your first encounter and the late night ice cream, the time he helped you find books at the library, the time you awkwardly met at the gym, the time you ran for 10 minutes just to buy water for him from a vending machine and how you realized your feelings for him then, and the time he came to visit while you were studying.

The last sentence was: He’s literally the most perfect human alive and honestly I’m so glad I’ve even met him; I like him a lot.

When you finished reading it, you closed it and walked away from where you had been standing in the living room to the kitchen, trying to process everything.

With your back turned, you said, “Jinhwan, just forget you ever read that, I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. Let’s just be friends still, okay? Please just forget about that...”

You were close to crying with how embarrassed you felt. You didn’t want your friendship to be ruined because of this.

“Are you sure you want me to forget about it?” Jinhwan asked you.

“Yes, please.”

“Even when I feel the same way?”

Now there was something that you did not expect. You could not have predicted this.

“What?” you asked, turning around to face him out of shock.

“I like you too, [y/n]. Do you want to forget about it?” he said, smiling the same smile he did on that first day when you were eating ice cream together at midnight.

“No, I... need time to process this...”

“Am I allowed to hug you, though?” Jinhwan asked, opening his arms. When you nodded, he moved towards you and wrapped his arms around you, placing his head into your shoulder. It was a hug that was so full of love, you felt like you were melting on the spot.

“You know I did all of those things because I like you, right? Helping you at the library and checking on you when you studied.. I didn’t know at the time, but I found out later... that I like you.”

[myjjbaby]

okay so a jj request where the reader has been keeping it a secret from jj that she’s epileptic (they’re dating) and then one night when they’re at a party and jj gets into a fight and she gets really overwhelmingly stressed from trying to get him to stop that it triggers a seizure, maybe like only kie knows she’s epileptic or something?? idk i totally get it if u aren’t comfortable writing this i just love ur writing and yeah ((:

i didn’t know

author’s note - guess who’s back, back again!! here’s a request surrounding mental illness and I just want to note that I am in no way intending to romanticize epilepsy or seizures, I just think that someone could really benefit from having a story that might fit with them and including a form of comfort through writing. big thanks to @jjmaybanx for her help because she helped me figure out a way to best portray what I wanted to get across.

synopsis - requested by anon! you kept a really big secret and it all crumbles away along with your so called perfect day.

warnings - epilepsy, seizing, underage drinking, fighting, overall angst for 1.6k. if any of these topics are possibly triggering to you please don’t read and if you have any concerns including me feel free to reach out.

Today was a perfect day. The sunrise was peeking through the window of John B’s spare room when you woke up, your blue eyed boy wrapped around you. You spent the better half of the morning admiring his peaceful features, blushing when he caught your stare.

“Morning, baby,” he smothered your cheek with an open mouth kiss, giggles erupting as he wrapped you in his arms, “you liking your view.”

You hummed lightly in agreement and continued to stare lovingly at your boyfriend. He traced your face with calloused fingers, brushing along the bridge of your nose as he watched you flush. JJ pulled you into his chest and your head rested comfortably on his collarbone while he kissed your hair.

“C ‘mon lovebirds, time to catch the waves.”

JJ groaned at John B, throwing an empty beer can at the door.

“Fuck off, let me hold my girl. It’s too early, the waves probably suck anyway.”

“JJ, it’s half past noon. Let’s go,” the brunette threw a muscle tank and a red baseball cap at your boyfriend, “Kie and Pope are already in the van.”

You smiled before trying to slip out of his grip and climb off the navy sheets. JJ caught your wrist in his warm hand, pulling you back into his familiar hold.

“J, we’ve gotta get up.”

He shook his head, curls tickling the underside of your jaw. Not long after, the two of you were packed into the back of the rusty Volkswagen with your boards trapped to the top.

JJ held you in his lap, kissing your neck when you threw your head back with laughter. His hands slipped under the gray fabric top you stole from him and prodded at the bikini strings. You slapped his hand away but he just smirked and continued twirling the purple straps between his fingertips.

“Ladies and gentlemen,” John B’s voice broke through the lively chatter, “let me present to you the finest Outer Banks waves ever.”

And he wasn’t wrong, the ocean was still wild from the surge of the hurricane a few days ago and the curl of each wave crashed beautifully. The Pogues climbed out of the beat up van before unstrapping all of the surfboards, John B and JJ running ahead with loud cheers being carried by the wind. You giggled as you carried your board alongside Kie, stopping just short of the sea. Looking over at the tanned girl, you sent her a wink and a bump to her hip before gliding off after your boys.

“You left a couple waves for me?”

“Of course,” the blonde reached his hand out to squeeze yours, “always do.”

The water was cool, relaxing her muscles, and JJ smiled, watching you absorb the sunshine. You all stayed out on the waves until your fingers were pruned and your eyes couldn’t stay open from the amount of salt water splashed on you.

Drifting back to shore, JJ was quick to grab your hand and bring it up to his face for a kiss. You felt content when John B drove the group to the Boneyard, a metal keg placed between you and Pope. The first kegger of the summer to end a perfect day.

A filled red solo cup quickly found its way into your hand and the bonfire burnt brightly as everyone showed up. Your fellow resident of the Cut, the Kooks from Figure Eight, and those clueless Tourons. You noticed your boyfriend’s grip pulling you back into his chest, successfully stumbling you away from the drunk idiots who couldn’t take a hint when JJ glared at them.

“Bub, ignore them.”

“I can’t.”

You chuckled when he clenched his jaw with jealousy.

“You have no reason to worry,” he hummed, features softening when they set on you, “I’m all yours, J.”

The night seemed to carry on without a hitch until a smooth hand slipped its way over your thigh. The soft skin contrasted the familiar roughness of JJ’s touch. You slipped your body away from the stranger’s eager touch.

“Where you going, girly?”

“Away from you.”

“I think you should stay right here wi-“”

His vulgar suggestion was cut off by a ring covered fist that you could recognize anywhere. JJ pushed you behind him as he overshadowed the clueless drunk boy. You could feel the blonde’s anger coming off him in waves, hand clenching and ripping his arm away when you went to hold him back. Your boyfriend was blinded by anger and his protectiveness over you.

“Stay the fuck away from my girl, you hear that?”

“What’s your problem?”

Wrong move, dumbass. JJ’s back was tense with bottled emotions, his breathing labored as he watched the Touron stand up.

“My problem? You thinking it’s okay to grab my girlfriend or any girl like that, that’s my problem.”

Like a fuse run out, JJ lunged at the stranger as a harsh gasp escaped your throat.

“J!”

He was seeing red, too absorbed by his anger to notice your cries or fastened breathing. Kiara, however, noticed when your hand lifted to your shirt, grasping the fabric as strangled heaves pressed out of your body.

“Y/N? Y/N! Hey, hey, c ‘mon, don’t give out on me,” she watched as you stumbled into a dune, collapsing to the sand, “Y/N? You still with me?”

Kie watched as your gaze fogged over as if you were in a daze. She quickly moved the rocks and driftwood from near you and shouted for Pope or John B’s attention, the two boys rushing to your side.

“Pope, start timing. We’re about five seconds in right now.”

“Timing? That’d only happen if Y/N was having a sei- shit, okay.”

“John B, help me roll her onto her side.”

The two best friends turned you over as your arms began to tremble.

“Eleven Mississippi, twelve Mississippi…”

John B watched on helplessly before realizing JJ wasn’t by your side. Running back into the crowd and pushing through the circle formed around the fight, the brunette grabbed your boyfriend and tugged him towards you.

“Baby? Hey, hey, baby? Kiara? what’s happening?”

“She didn’t- she didn’t tell you,” Kie searched JJ’s panicked gaze for some kind of recognition.

“Tell me what? Kiara? What the fuck is happening?”

“She’s having a seizure! She’s epileptic! The fight must’ve overwhelmed her and triggered a seizure.”

“I didn’t know. I didn’t know,” he mumbled to himself shuffling closer to your frozen body. JJ stared back at Kie before turning to your disoriented figure laying out of the sand. He fell to his knees beside you, grabbing your face to try and comfort you.

“JJ, don’t touch her!”

“What? Why?”

“You can’t just grab her when she’s like this. You need to cool off and wait for it to end.”

“I- I didn’t- I didn’t know. I didn’t know.”

Harsh sobs were pulled from his chest as he gripped his hair tightly. JJ had never felt so useless watching you, the girl he loved, struggling and he didn’t even know how to help you.

“W- Wh- What just, what just h- happened?”

Kie sighed when she watched you slowly come out of your stunned state. You glanced around bewildered not knowing where you were or how you got there.

“You had a seizure, Y/N. There was a fight and it just stressed you out,” she watched the panic cross your face again, “hey, it’s okay. Everyone is okay. You’re okay.”

You quickly scanned the group in front of you until your eyes landed on tear filled blue ones. You breathed in a short gasp seeing your boyfriend so torn up in front of you.

“JJ?”

He slowly inched towards you until he pulled you onto his lap like countless times before, but this time felt different.

“Could we have a minute?”

JJ glanced up at his friends before they all nodded and stepped away, clearing the infamous beach of the wandering partygoers. You didn’t dare look back up at the blonde boy, hating the pained look you knew would greet you if you did.

“I- I’m so sorry,” you fiddled with your fingers until he slowly gripped your own, pulling you deeper into his frame.

“Y/N, this isn’t something you can just keep from me.”

“I know, I know and I really am sorry. It was unfair of me to keep something like this from you. I just wanted to be normal.”

JJ nodded slightly, pressing a tender kiss to the crown of your head.

“I felt so hopeless. I didn’t know what the hell was happening and when I tried to help I just made it worse.”

“That’s my fault,” he vigorously shook his head, “yes, it is. I love you and should’ve told you.”

You sat in silence, JJ’s legs slotted between yours, his chin resting on top of your head. You leaned back and pressed your lips to his temple and the blue eyed boy returned the gesture with a soft smile. The silence was peaceful and perfect until JJ shifted to look down at you.

“Do you think I could get away with using the internet at work?”

“What? Why?”

“Hurricane knocked the towers down and I need to do some research, so I can take care of you.”

“I love you, J.”

“Love you too, baby.”

[passable-talent]

what about,,, modern au,,, punk mucisian au,,,, anakin with tattoos pLEASE

may I introduce u to my new favorite gif...

also. plot twist! what if,, and hear me out,, you’re the musician, and he’s the fan?

i made an entire setlist for this fuckn au of my taste in punk-ish rock-ish music to base certain lines, moods, and lighting off of. it exists. i’ll hand it over if you ask.

stumbled over this headcanon as i wrote but,,,, modern au anakin absolutely grew up in nevada. desert. middle of nowhere. close to vegas and the racing. automobile industry. thank u for ur time  

This whole ‘music’ thing was actually working out. Imagine that. 

You were gaining fame slowly- your record company still didn’t get you big gigs, but you got something. 

Something like this, in fact. A small, dingy laser tag place, but it was perfect nonetheless. Perfect for you. You felt right at home- it was too hot, and the audience was still loud, since the music hadn’t started. The stage was small, but the lights were bright, and you were standing behind the curtains that had been hung barely a foot from the wall. 

“Ready?” you heard Padme ask- Padme, the lead guitarist, your best friend. She was on stage, currently, hidden from the crowd by a blanket of black. On the other side of the stage, you knew, was Ahsoka, the drummer, a little tiny teenager you’d picked up last summer when your original drummer quit, and beside her was undoubtedly Aayla, your bassist. You were lucky- you were surrounded by such great friends that you could pull your weight without having to play the guitar. Which was good for everyone- you were an awful guitar player. 

“Anytime, loves,” you said, a smile lighting your lips. You’d almost overdosed on the anti-anxiety pills this morning- the feeling of playing a gig still unfamiliar and nerve wracking. 

But you heard the music start, and started to sing. 

Only when this particular song really kicked into gear did you toss open the curtain, and the cheer went up, almost drowning out the music. You were certainly the fan favorite of the band, only because you were the most expressive. You didn’t have an instrument, so you got to run around on stage, and kneel down to reach out, brushing your fingers to the crowd’s as you sang, like God to Adam. 

It really wasn’t a looks thing- for some, it might be, but not to most. Hey, if there was anyone that should really get the attention, it was Padme. She was unfairly beautiful. 

The great thing about being a punk artist was that most of your fans were, too. They came with their tattoos and snuck in their weed, their ripped jeans always leaving with a few more holes than they arrived with. A band like yours, so dominated by women, had really caught on with a female crowd, but there were always guys here, too. You never really cared to know if it was their dicks or their ears that brought them.

There was a little bit of a problem, though. You were well known for trying to make connections with as many fans as you could- not for your sake, but for theirs. You loved taking selfies, touching their fingers, winking at them during a particularly suggestive lyric, guys and girls alike. Which lead to a little problem, one that Ahsoka loved to refer to as your ‘wattpad fantasy’. 

Growing up when you had, you’d all been all over the internet, into each of its corners. You knew the common trope that teenaged fans had with their favorite artists- that they’d catch the eye of the main singer, and get dragged backstage after the show.

You had the opposite fantasy. Too many times did one or another audience member catch your eye, and yeah, sometimes you did consider catching them before they left after the show. It never worked- either you lost track of them, or you didn’t have the guts to go through with it. 

When you laid eyes on him, though, you wanted so desperately to go through with it tonight. 

You tried not to be obvious, you really did try to be subtle- but whenever the multicolored lights caught his hair, your gaze was pulled back to him, no matter how much you wanted to give equal attention to every audience member brave enough to wrestle their way to the front row. 

But you also wanted to make sure he knew. That you’d noticed him.

With one or two lyrics, lines like “tell me that you love me, even if it’s only for tonight”, you let your eyes catch his, hoping to whatever powers there might’ve been that he’d be looking back at you. 

The halftime break, the intermission, came faster than expected, and you dropped into the one room the laser tag place set aside for you, and tried to clean as much sweat from your scalp and hair as you could. 

“Alright, what is it?” Padme asked from behind you.

“What to you mean?” you asked, glancing at her through the mirror you were using to try to artfully smudge your eyeliner. 

“You’re favoring the left side of the audience. What, find a wattpad boy?”

“Another one?” Ahsoka called from the other side of the room, rubbing sore callouses on her palms.

“Yeah, yeah,” you waved them off with a laugh, “let me dream.” 

Act II came around, and back to the stage you went, trying to be even more subtle this time around. Still, you kept track of him- he hadn’t moved far. Maybe, if you watched him carefully enough, you’d get to meet him before he left. 

It was hard to do, and you hadn’t yet been successful. You really weren’t supposed to offer fans any ‘free’ attention, or at least, that was the way your manager had put it. If you let everybody take a picture with you, then no one will buy backstage passes. 

A sentiment that your anarchist side absolutely resented. Fuck capitalism, you wanted to chill with your fans. 

But hey, back on topic! It was amazing how you could totally tune out during a song, and tune back in, still strutting around the state, still singing perfectly. Luckily, you’d brought yourself back to reality, right when the second to last song was about to end. 

When it faded away, you stepped to the center of the stage, readjusting your mic quickly and letting a real smile come over your face. 

And this- this was it. No matter how fantastic any show was, it would never top this. You always went out with the same song, way back from your first album, one of the first you’d ever written. You heard Padme start to strum.

“And with that, we’re coming to the end,” you said over the guitar, speaking to the audience like you knew every person there. “So I want you to all sing along with this one. Every damn word. Because tonight- this is a night none of us are going to forget.” You’d said it a hundred times, and yet, you meant it every time. When you stopped speaking, you started singing, abandoning your strutting and stomping for just standing at the front of the stage, looking at them all. 

“It was a fall night, late night-” There was a reason you always ended with this song. It was so beautiful, and so sensual. It was a promise, between you, and your band, and your fans, a promise that it was all for them, not for whatever rode in their wallets. A promise that you would keep looking out for them. 

And when you began the chorus, you dropped to your knees, getting that much closer to them, your smile so genuine, because you could hear them, every single one of them, like they were performing for you. It was their night as much as yours, it was their music more than it was yours. 

A hundred voices welling up around yours was always what kept you awake at night, kept you coming back, pushing through the looks that people gave you when you said you were trying to make it in the music industry, pushing through the late nights where you couldn’t make it through that lyric. This song, right here, this was what brought you back, kept reminding you what mattered. 

You stopped singing, and they continued without you. They always did- they would see how you just looked at them all, with the realest smile they’d ever seen, and they sang for you. 

You couldn’t help it. You watched him- and he was singing, too. 

This time, you knew for sure. You knew he was watching you, too, and when your eyes locked, the voices around you all swelled to a crescendo, like a soundtrack to the scene you were living through. 

You had to snap yourself back into the world to pick up the second verse. It stayed just as intimate, just as amazing, all the way to the end of the song, when you sang the final note, and just stood there, basking in it, in a world made just for you. 

The stage lights flickered out, and you disappeared into the dark. 

Over your earpiece, one of the roadies informed you that your mics were off, and that’s exactly the way you liked them. You dropped onto the stage, hanging your legs over the front of it. You were still a few feet from the closest little fence, but it was closer than you’d been to them yet. 

“Hey, guys,” you hissed toward anyone within earshot. That alone, in the dim light, gathered a crowd of twenty or so who had noticed you. You always did this at the end of the show- just to let them hear their name on your tongue. 

And maybe, today, to find him. 

You looked to a girl who had her hand outstretched to you, and you took it briefly.

“Hey, what’s your name?” you asked, and she shouted back “Oran!”

“Oran, almost like the color, huh?” You were so much more at ease now than you were, before the show. “I bet you hear that all the time.” You turned to someone else, always trying to make it through as many people as possible. 

How many could you touch base with before turning to him, so that it wouldn’t be suspicious? Was three enough, or should you do one more?

No, when you caught his eyes, there was no turning back. 

“Hey, what’s up,” you said, fighting to keep your heartbeat under control. 

“Anakin,” he said, then pulling a bright yellow card out of his jacket. That, you’d recognize anywhere- that was a backstage pass. 

Like the universe was aligning for you. 

“Well, Anakin, if you’ve got a pass, I’ll see you later, yeah?” As you usually did from a person who had a pass, you moved on quickly, giving this time to others who wouldn’t get more. You heard six or seven more names before Ahsoka was tugging on your shoulder. 

“Alright, alright,” you groaned, throwing your legs over the stage again and standing up, but not before blowing one last kiss toward the small crowd you’d gathered. 

As soon as you made it back, into where the speakers cluttered up all of the space, you collapsed against Ahsoka, laughing as she struggled to hold you up.

“What, thinking about your wattpad boy?” she said, throwing you to your feet.

“Oh, not again,”  Aayla whined, “he’ll be no different than every other one that you dream of finding at next week’s show, and then never see again.”

“No, no, this one’s different!” you insisted, grabbing onto Padme’s shirt. She brushed you off with a laugh.

“Oh yeah? How?” 

“His name is Anakin,” you said, rubbing your lower lip between your teeth. “And he’s got a backstage pass.” 

“What??” Came the collective cry, and you shushed them all before your manager appeared. 

It was showtime, baby. 

There were two or three of them, in total. The passes tended not to sell too well, and there were only a few available, anyway. The band just wasn’t quite big enough to pull that kind of fandom, save for a few die-hards who would one day get to pull out a photo and say ‘see? I was there at the beginning.’ 

Anakin was the last of the bunch. 

“Great to meet you,” you said, shaking his hand for real this time. His eyes were damn intense- no wonder you’d been mesmerized by them. 

“You too,” he said, and introductions went just as seamlessly with the others. Padme hugged him, and Ahsoka, little firecracker, gave him a playful punch for telling her that she looked taller when she was on stage. 

Now- there’s a reason Padme’s your best friend in the world. 

“Hey, it’s getting late,” she informed you, as though she were telling you to wrap it up. But she was smarter than that, and had set up the perfect trap.

“Oh,” Anakin said, looking slightly guilty and quite disappointed. “Well, I-” 

“Nah,” you cut him off, smacking the back of your hand against his chest, “You paid for fifteen minutes, you’ll get them. We’ve just got to start packing up. You can chill with us, if you want.” No matter the fame difference between the five of you, he was just another guy in his early 20′s, the same as the rest of you, save for eighteen year old Ahsoka. He meshed well with the lot of you, and even helped load ‘Soka’s drums into the truck. 

And, hey- he knew what he was getting into when he climbed into the back of the van with the four of you.

And what he was getting into was a bumpy-ass ride to one of the shittiest hotels the area could offer. It wasn’t even midnight, and you didn’t feel like climbing into bed just yet, so you let him follow the four of you upstairs so you could grab your phone and room key before leaving them to entertain themselves for the evening. 

“Come home alive!” Aayla called as a farewell, and Ahsoka snorted from where she was laying on her bed. 

“Come home capable of walking,” she said, and Padme saved you by slamming the door shut. 

“So what’s there to do around here?” you asked him, shoving your hands into your pockets. You walked close to him, shoulders almost brushing with each step, and his smile was just for you.

“Are you kidding? Absolutely nothing. You’re lucky you found the laser tag place.” You looked toward him with a laugh, the ugly carpeting of the hotel hallway stretching on forever in front of you.

“Seriously? How could you survive?”

“Hey, not every town is downtown LA.” 

“I’m flattered you think I’m famous enough to live in LA.” You stopped at the elevator, punching the down button. He nudged your shoulder playfully, those piercing blue eyes flicking over your face. 

“You’re gonna be. You guys are really good.”

“Good to know I have your blessing for my career.” 

“I’m serious!” he said with a laugh, and when the elevator door opened, he let you inside first. 

“Yeah, yeah. So if there’s nothing to do around here...” You tilted your head at him, watching as he rested his shoulders back against the buffed metal wall. “What do you do?”

“Find a friend’s basement to smoke in,” he said with a laugh, and you couldn’t help but join him. “Mostly we go see movies, or sneak onto a roof, if we’re lucky.” You narrowed your eyes, letting your gaze slide to the elevator buttons. 

“A roof, you say?” 

“I don’t want to get you in trouble-”

“Anakin, answer me this-” You pulled out your phone to check the time. “Do you think the lobby security agent of this Comfort Inn is going to be dedicated enough to check the roof at 12:23 AM?” The world outside this elevator didn’t exist as his lips turned up into a smirk.

“No, I don’t think they will.”

“In that case-” You slipped your second knuckle against the highest number on the wall- 6. Not very impressive, but it would do.

Once the elevator went down to the lobby, and back up again, you stumbled your way to the stairwell and up, finding the door that said ‘roof access- do not enter’. Since when do you ever listen?

If you listened to some red sign on a door, you wouldn’t have your head on Anakin’s shoulder, looking up at more stars than you’d ever seen in your entire life. 

You’d grown up in California, too close to some of the largest cities in the country to ever see the night sky like this. He’d grown up here, where there were warehouses for shipping to Reno, or Vegas, or Salt Lake City, but none of those cities were close enough to steal the sky.

“See those two, right on top of each other?” He asked, pointing to an area a few degrees up from the horizon.

“Yeah, I think,” you said, and he lifted his left arm, where he had a constellation pattern tattooed between his elbow and wrist. 

“It’s this one. The phoenix. The first constellation I actually saw in the sky.” You reached out, taking hold of his elbow, and positioning his arm, from your perspective, just next to the constellation. “My mom took me out to a field and showed me the stars,” he said, and though you couldn’t see his face, you could hear the fondness in his voice. “For a long time, I wanted to be an astronaut.”

“Me too,” you said with a laugh, “but I wasn’t good enough in math.” 

“My mom’s friend Watto says I’m too good with cars to fly a ship.”

“Wouldn’t that make you better?” You asked, readjusting so that your shoulder pressed to his. It was a little cold.

“You’d think so, right?” You were such a loud person, that all too often you fought against silence- not tonight. You let it envelope you, bringing with it peace. You could hear Anakin breathing, and it was so calming, your eyes slipped closed.

“You’re going to fall asleep up here,” he said, a hint of playfulness in his voice. 

“Shut up,” you groaned, “I had a long day, and you’re warm.” 

“You should go back to the room, then.” You rolled over onto your stomach, then, taking a good look at him. 

“But that would mean that this night has to end.” He lifted his chest up by planting his elbows down, bringing himself closer to you. 

“You said it yourself,” he said, voice smooth and quiet, “this is a night we’re not going to forget.”

“But that doesn’t mean I want it to end,” you breathed, unable to look away from him. You barely noticed it when he begun to lean forward, but then his lips were on yours, and that you certainly took notice of. 

Your eyes fluttered closed, thanks to the shock and the welcome nature of it, and you leaned into it. He brought his furthest hand up and let it slide to the back of your neck, as though he could keep you from pulling away. You wouldn’t.

Your lips were still parted when he pulled away, your mind struggling to catch up. He’d- he’d just-

Calloused fingers brushed your hair back, and you opened your eyes to their touch, being drawn right back to his gaze. 

“Then it doesn’t have to.” 

-🦌 Roe

part 2

[angrylizardjacket]

i’ll be in the front row {Joe Mazzello}

Anon asked: lil prompt I thought of while doing my laundry: imagine meeting Joe while you’re both doing your laundry at a laundromat. it’s nyc, so apartments with full wash & dryer are hard to come by. joe is always running lines with himself, and you both sometimes loan each other quarters when one of you runs out.

Anon asked: tbh I don’t have anything specific to request, but I am begging you to please write more for Joe. srsly you write him so well & he deserves more content!!! 🐚 

A/N: 3269 words. my little garbage brain had to yell at me not to write this like the laundry scene from Dr Horrible. BIG FLUFF. set around undrafted. hope you enjoy. PLEASE leave feedback!! i love this so so very much omfg.

----

You always see him on Sundays, eleven in the morning, like clockwork. Dark sunglasses, fancy backpack, but nondescript clothes; sweater and jeans, baseball jersey and jeans, laundry day clothes if you’ve ever seen them. He’s a little familiar, but you’re not sure why. Sometimes he’s wearing a cap, but not with any sort of consistency, at least not in the six months since you’d been coming there. 

For the record, you’re not staring, he’s the only person who comes in at the exact same time as you, give or take fifteen minutes, and he, like you, always waits for his laundry. It’s only been in the past few months that you’d even started recognizing each other, smiling and giving the other a wave across the machines. It’s harmless, it’s people watching, it’s routine.

One morning, he’s sitting on his washing machine, with a pen in his mouth and a stack of papers in one hand. His usual sunglasses are propped up on his head, which isn’t an unusual occurrence when he reads - is it weird that you know that? Kind of. He’s highlighting something, mouthing whatever he’s reading too fast for you to catch, and anyways, you’re trying not to stare. You’re half paying attention to a kitschy game on your phone since your washing is almost done, and you heave your damp clothes into the dryer.

“Damnit,” patting your pockets again, and searching through your change, you can’t help but scowl and come to an annoying conclusion. All you have is a fifty, and the change machine in the laundromat only spits out quarters.

“You okay?” It’s the guy with the script, your quiet laundry buddy, looking at you with slight concern, pen still in his mouth.

“Yeah,” you huff a sigh, putting on a strained smile, “two quarters short for the dryer.” Usually you had smaller bills, or just remembered to bring the right change, “can you watch my stuff while I go to the gas station to get change?”

“I can cover two quarters,” he offers easily with a slight smile, pulling the pen from his mouth and putting it, the highlighter, and the stack of papers, onto the dryer after he jumps from it. You stumble through trying to brush him off and refuse graciously, but he’s already elbow-deep in his backpack, telling you it’s no trouble.

“I owe you,” you say with half a laugh, and he shares in your amusement.

“Yeah, I’ll hold you to that,” he replies with an amiable sarcasm, which has you laughing. After you start the dryer, however, you turn back and he’s regarding you with a frown, leaning on the washing machine with his stuff in it.

“Do I have something on my face?” You ask with surprising uncertainty, and he’s quick to clear the frown from his face as he shakes his head.

“No, it’s just kind of weird that we’ve been coming here for so long but never... like, spoken.” He muses, and you feel yourself growing surprised. He offers his hand. “Joe.”

“Y/N,” you say, shaking his hand firmly, and he quietly repeats your name back to himself, like he’s committing it to memory. Something warms in your chest, and you can’t help but look at the stack of papers he’d been focusing intently on, “may I ask what you’re working on?” And he looks confused for the barest moment, quickly followed by excitement, and then what you recognize as him very deliberately restraining that excitement into something more polite.

“It’s a script,” and he kind of sounds... apologetic?

“And...?” You prompt, before backpeddling, “I mean, if you don’t wanna talk about it, that’s fine, I mean we technically just met -” and he’s waiving you off goodnaturedly.

“No, I know, I know,” he assures, “I just... another white guy writing a script in New York?” He makes a face, “get a real personality, am I right?” He laughs self-deprecatingly, but it seems to hit a little too close to home for him, and his expression falls. It’s a sentiment he’s been on the receiving end of far too many times.

“What’s it about?” You ask, gentle and genuinely curious, and his eyebrows raise in surprise as he meets your gaze. Tentatively hopeful, he explains that he’s on the fourth draft of it, that it’s loosely based on his brother’s experiences trying to make it into the Major Leagues in baseball. Most of it goes over your head, but you can’t help but be intrigued. 

“I’m not super big into baseball,” you admit as he’s winding down, “but it sounds awesome, dude; let me know when it’s in theaters and I’ll be in the front row.” He grins at that.

You exchange phone numbers a month later, the pair of you getting take out at the fast food joint across the road from the laundromat, so you could still at least keep somewhat of an eye on your clothes. He’s in between drafts of the script, and they’re actually in preproduction, and you realise oh, he’s actually serious about this.

“See, that’s the difference,” you tell him, leaning your elbows on the table and pointing a finger at him, “the difference is that you follow through.”

“What?” He laughs, not yet following your train of thought.

“Every other white guy in New York could write a script, but none of them would follow through and get it made; you’re ambitious, Joe.”

“I’m not ambitious, I’m just lucky,” he shrugs, a blush creeping up his cheeks, but you won’t let it slide.

“Luck will only get you so far,” you tut, and he gives you a strange look.

“Have you... never seen Jurassic Park?”

“When I was younger,” you shrugged.

“Or The Social Network?”

“I’ve really been meaning to, why?” 

“No reason,” Joe shakes his head with a disbelieving grin, and doesn’t bring it up again.

A few weeks later, he’s late by almost a full half an hour, which you’re not particularly bothered by, you get the impression that he’s a busy guy, but he runs in, laundry basket in hand, apologizing breathlessly. 

“No need to apologise,” you tell him with a bright smile, putting your phone away, “everything okay?”

“Budget meeting ran late,” he explains, gracelessly lumping his clothes into the washing machine and throwing a few tide pods in along with them, “filming’s so close, I just lost track of time.”

“Oh, shit really? Wait have you already cast it?” You asked with a surprisingly genuine excitement; over the weeks, you’ve become rather invested in this project.

“Yeah, didn’t I tell you?” He asked with a grin, “casting was finalized two weeks ago; we start rehearsals next Saturday.”

“That’s so exciting!” You enthused, before laughing, “anyone I’d recognize?” And it’s mostly a joke, but Joe gives pause, evaluating you before he pushes start on his washing machine.

“I don’t know,” he answers genuinely, before conceding, “I mean, apart from me -”

“Acting, writing, and directing; does that make you a triple threat?” You asked coyly, and he breaks out into grin.

“And producing,” he reminds, and you make an impressed noise, nodding.

“Quadruple threat, excuse me.”

“But honestly, I don’t know if you’d recognize them; do you know,” and he goes back to the topic at hand, frowning a little, “Aaron Tveit?” You’re a little speechless, before answering.

“Not personally,” you find yourself answering, which gets Joe to laugh, “shit, dude, from Broadway?” And Joe’s wearing a proud little smile when he nods in confirmation, “and the Les Mis movie?”

“The very same,” Joe agrees, and your mouth hangs agape, “I told you, this is a real movie, I’m not filming this in my backyard,” after a beat, he licks his lips and jumps to sit on the washing machine, “have you seriously never googled me?”

“Why would I?” You asked, and he huffs a disbelieving laugh, shaking his head again in that way that you don’t quite understand. “Should I?” You finally ask, and Joe shrugs, smiling bright and carefree. He’s even swinging his legs, ankles crossed.

“I’m not a murderer, if that’s what’s got you worried,” he muses with a surprisingly carefree grin, “I mean, I’m kind of glad that you haven’t, it means you actually like me for me, you know?”

“Of course I do,” you answer automatically, and Joe’s expression turns fond, “I really like you, dude,” you explain, “I’m kind of in awe of what you’re accomplishing.” And you mean it with your whole heart, “if you’d prefer I didn’t google you, I won’t; I don’t make a habit of googling my friends, I won’t start with you.” When you say this, something about him relaxes, and he hops off the washing machine.

“Wanna grab lunch?” He asks with a smile, which you mirror without hesitation, and agree.

They’re filming out of state, which Joe tells you the week before he leaves, and you hadn’t realised how much you would miss him until the first Sunday rolls around, and you’re sitting in the laundromat alone.

Your phone goes off with a notification at exactly eleven.

It’s a photo of Joe and Aaron Tveit in baseball jerseys, covered in dirt, grinning.

[HOLY SHIT] you send back, following it up with [IS THAT] and then you wait a moment before adding [QUADRUPLE THREAT JOE MAZZELLO??] 

[christ 😳😅🥰] he sends back, and something about his restrained but still obviously flustered response has your heart skip a beat. [is it weird that i miss the laundromat?]

[yes 😂]

[and you of course i miss you too] he’s quick to follow it up with, and your own smile grows wider. You take a photo of the empty laundromat and draw in a terrible stick figure impression of him and send it back.

[miss u too haha] and you give pause before sending [hey if u ever wanna send other prod photos.......] [u don’t just have to send them on sunday]

[you haven’t signed an NDA 😂]

[joseph who am i gonna tell??]

[your other friends idk]

[my lips are ZIPPED 🤐] [photos for personal use only]

[personal use????? 😘😘]

[dont be GROSS]

[but i wanna be gross!!]

So now you’re flustered in the middle of the laundromat, completely at a loss as to how to respond to that. 

[are u flirting with me joseph?] you send back, and you watch the three little typing dots as they hover for a very long time.

[only if you’re into it]

Oh. 

[the FIRST WEEK YOU’RE AWAY FROM THE LAUNDROMAT AND YOU’RE PULLING THIS SHIT] [i AM into it but fuck 😳😅]

[I’VE BEEN FLIRTING WITH YOU FOR WEEKS]

Oh!

[OH]

[THE FIRST WEEK I’M AWAY FROM THE LAUNDROMAT AND YOU FINALLY PICK UP ON IT???]

[go direct ur baseball movie 🥰😅] you send, and tuck your phone away, feeling rather like a fool, but a pleased fool nonetheless, and you’re grinning for the rest of the day.

Photos are exchanged often after that, usually selfies, or photos of where either of you were, what you were doing, the flirting turning absolutely less subtle with each day that passes until you’re just complimenting each other, and mentioning occasionally how you miss the other.

When he sends a photo of himself posing against the fence of the dugout in a way that showed off his ass, you can’t help but make it your lock screen, though it’s quickly followed by a video and a text that reads [i was told i have to send you this too,,, for context].

“This feels undignified,” says a strangely familiar voice from off-screen, presumably filming, while Joe was trying to ask for opinions on how he should pose.

“This is undignified,” comes someone else’s response, and the camera swings around to reveal an amused Tyler Hoechlin, opening a water bottle, “this Y/N must be real cute.” In the background, a few others, vaguely recognizable, all in baseball uniforms, snicker.

“They are!” Joe answered defiantly, grinning, one leg up against the wire, looking over his shoulder, “are you filming me?” The camera flips around and you get a pretty glorious angle directly up Aaron Tveit’s nose.

“No -”

The video stops abruptly, and you’re all but wheezing with laughter, though all you send back is;

[so worth it] [ur ass *chef’s kiss*]

[THANK YOU] [you get it] [knew there was a reason i liked you so much]

The moment he gets back to New York, he asks you out to dinner. Of course you say yes.

For your third date, he offers to cook you dinner, and watch a movie, prefaced with a question that you’re surprised he still asks; have you really not googled me? And the honest answer you always give: no.

His apartment has a lot of movie posters, of movies you’ve heard of but never seen, or seen when you were very little.

“Big movie buff, obviously,” you note with a little smile, and he raises his eyebrows in amusement at your observation. Even moreso when you excitedly coo about how you haven’t seen Jurassic Park in so long when he suggests it.

“Your self restraint is godlike, babe,” he snickers, and you’re not quite sure what he means, you’re kind of just happy to be here. 

He cooks dinner, and you both sit down in front of his alarmingly big TV, and you feel a warm rush of nostalgia at the opening. You’re eating quietly, watching with rapt attention, but you can feel Joe watching you expectantly. 

“What’s up?” You ask, turning to him, confused, and his smile grows a little wider, and his gaze flicks to the screen for a moment, and then back to you.

“Just waiting for it to click.”

“For what to click?” 

“Babe,” and he says it like he can’t quiet believe it, his gaze now focused on the screen where the kids, Tim and Lex, were being introduced, “that’s me.” And follow his gaze and holy shit. A lot of things start making a lot more sense.

He’s not sure what he’s expecting your reaction to be, but the way your face lights up, and the unbridled enthusiasm and compliments that pour out of you, was not it, but he’s definitely not complaining. 

“Wait!” Your eyes sparkle as you look around his apartment, the movie posters he had everywhere now having a completely different meaning, “all these...?”

“Every single one,” he agrees, a little abashed, suddenly humble, and you grin when you finally look back at him.

“I didn’t think I could be more awed by you, but dude,” you enthused, “that’s cool as hell! You’re cool as hell!” But you take a deep breath, putting your plates onto the coffee table, sitting as close to him as you could, “but I would have thought the world on you even if you hadn’t done any of this,” and he tries to brush it off, but you’re adamant, “no, I mean it, I like you for you, Joe, not for what you’ve done, but... for who you are.”

“You’re gonna make me blush,” he shoots for serious, but misses entirely thanks to his pleased little smile.

“Good,” you tell him seriously, and kiss both of his pink cheeks before kissing him. Your dinner might get a little cold after that, but you can always reheat it. 

You comfort him over the weeks it takes to edit him film, Undrafted, though he’ll never let you see too much of the final product; he wants you to see it in cinemas first.

It’s still kind of surreal to you that Joe Mazzello is both a movie star, and your boyfriend. He’s still friends with Laura Dern, and he also spends eight dollars a week at a laundromat to wash his clothes. Bizarre. But you kind of like how down-to-earth he is. 

What’s more bizarre is when he invites you to the red carpet premiere of his movie.

“Me?” You squeaked, and he seemed a little confused at your hesitation, his hands on your shoulders.

“You,” he nodded slowly, not understanding why you’re suddenly nervous.

“For real?”

“Yeah, of course I want you there; you said so yourself, you’d be in the front row, right?” He smiled a little and you could feel your heart melt.

“You remember that?”

“Of course I do,” he tells you gently, “it’s one of the reasons I liked you in the first place.” He’s so earnest; you agree easily.

The red carpet is a whole other world, you find, dressed to the nines, styled by someone you don’t know, cameras flashing in your face -

“Is this Y/N?” Tyler Hoechlin is saying your name. What universe is this? Joe was blushing furiously with his arm around you as the cast made their way over.

“Finally, a face for a name,” and that’s Aaron Tveit; you have to remind yourself not to get star struck. Instead, you smile and offer your hand to them both, which they shake, smiling and greeting you warmly. 

“Don’t embarrass me, you assholes,” Joe warned, though his tone was amused, and the others chuckled, clapping him on the shoulder.

“Wouldn’t dream of it, Mister Director,” Aaron assured.

“You’re good at doing that on your own,” Tyler added, and Joe gave him the finger, but held you a little tighter. 

“Did he send you the video of when he asked me to take that photo? You know the one,” Aaron asked, and you straightened your posture, grinning brightly.

“With an ass like his, I don’t know why you’d think it’s undignified,” you said loftily, and there was a beat as everyone took in what you said.

“I fucking love you,” Joe half laughed, pulling you in for a kiss.

“You’re good,” Tyler snorted, shaking his head with a grin, and Aaron was just straight-up laughing. The rest of the cast took to you easily, though most of the in-jokes among them went over your head, by Joe’s side, you never really felt left out. 

The theater itself was cool and dark, but you could feel the whole cast and crew thrumming with excitement and nervous energy, and Joe gave your hand a squeeze where your fingers were interlaced. 

It’s clear he’d poured his heart and soul into the movie, his fingerprints were all over every aspect of it, and you couldn’t quite believe you were watching it all finally completed; it had been almost a year since you’d first asked him about it, and now, here you were, hand in hand with him at the premiere. 

As the credits rolled, as the crowd clapped, and you along with them, you found yourself speechless. Joe, quiet and surprisingly nervous, turns to you.

“What’d you think?” His voice is quiet, uncertain, and you all but tackle him across the armrest, kissing him until you’re both breathless.

“I’m so proud of you,” you gasp against his lips, “I’m so fucking proud of you.”

“I couldn’t have done it without you,” his voice is gentle as he takes your face in his hands, but you shake your head.

“You could have, babe, you absolutely could have, you’ve got so much ambition and talent -”

“I didn’t want to do it without you,” he admits in a rush, and you freeze, eyes on his, “I mean it.” And you’re kissing him again, hoping he can feel the pride and love that’s flowing through you. There’s an afterparty to get to, drinks with the cast and crew, and a comfortable bed waiting after that, you know, but you can’t help but bask in this one moment together, just a little longer.

[charmedseoull]

Interview with sugamins about her work House of Cards (Ao3′s second most hit English work and most hit BTS work)

Before You Read the Interview

Archive of Our Own Transcript

Reddit Transcript Part 1 / Part 2

House of Cards is documented within the Top 50 Most Hit BTS Works on Archive of Our Own Project, otherwise known as T50BTS, by Charmedseoul. It is the second most hit English work on the Archive of Our Own platform, most hit BTS work, and 16th most hit work overall. It centers around the internationally popular K-Pop idol group BTS (Bangtan Sonyeondan) with the main characters being Park Jimin, Kim Taehyung, and Jeon Jungkook. This work is being documented for historical purposes for the Fanlore website with its own page. Charmedseoul is a BTS-focused anonymous historian who plans to eventually document each of the top 50 most hit BTS work on Ao3 as in depth as this one. If you are in contact with any of the authors of these works, please contact her on Twitter @charmedseoul or on Tumblr @charmedseoull.

Parts of this interview have been edited with links to Fanlore and Wikipedia pages for understanding. Any information in [brackets] serves for further clarity for readers and elaboration of information.

Disclaimers: This interview contains spoilers for the BTS Archive of Our Own work House of Cards. The story’s Archive of Our Own tags contain violence and gangster activity, along with discussion of prostitution and drug use. The full tag list is:

Alternate Universe - Gangsters

Gang Violence

Violence

Drugs

Drug Use

Explicit Sexual Content

Explicit Language

Blood and Gore

Blood and Torture

Gambling

Gunplay

Undercover

Disturbing Themes

Homophobic Language

Attempted Rape/Non-Con

Xenophobia

Dom/sub

Threesome - M/M/M

Drug Addiction

Dubious Consent

This interview discusses an 18+ mature work and Not Safe for Work topics. Please read this interview at your own discretion. You are responsible for the content you consume.

House of Cards by sugamins is a multi-chapter Archive of Our Own fanfiction that follows police officer Kim Taehyung’s undercover operation into the gangster world of Haedogje Pa. Jeon Jungkook, shrouded in an air of mystery and dubbed “The Boy,” is the heir to this crime empire. Park Jimin lives with him, acting as a lover of sorts in a high, pristine penthouse apartment. The story follows the three and their complicated relationship where sex, violence, and drugs surround them. Kim Taehyung tries to take down the empire as his moral lines of black and white begin blurring into gray. In this crime-ridden alternate reality to Seoul, everything from the structure of the gangster world to the trust between three lovers is as fragile as a house of cards.

Now presenting the interview with sugamins, author of Archive of Our Own’s second most hit English work and most hit BTS work, House of Cards:

How did you start writing?

How did you get into fanfiction?

How much writing experience did you have prior to House of Cards?

Do you have any literary or artistic inspirations? Any other authors or works that have inspired you to create anytime before or after House of Cards?

How did you become an ARMY [ARMY stands for Adorable Representative MC for the Youth. It is the fandom name for fans of BTS, otherwise known as Bangtan Sonyeondan]?

I started writing fanfiction in 2012. But before then, I used to enjoy writing stories as a child and young teenager. I used to write and illustrate my own stories. I even had a sketchbook filled with my own comic book, which was terrible! But I've always been creative. It started with art and then I moved onto writing when I discovered I was able to be much more creative with my words rather than my pencil.

I first got into fanfiction through my years spent on Tumblr. I had always known that it had existed, but I had never really gone looking for it because I hadn't belonged to a fandom at that point in my life. It was back in 2012 when I stumbled upon an EXO fanfic that a lot of people were talking about (Arbitrage, you can find it on Livejournal.) I read it and then thought...wow, so this is fanfiction! From that point, I started reading more and more, mostly Infinite fanfiction. And then I decided to start writing with the encouragement of an old online friend, and here I am!

In terms of writing experience, I have never formally received education. I stopped studying English Language and Literature when I was 16, instead focusing on Art, History, and Religious Education (purely because I wanted to learn about philosophy and quantum mechanics) for my final two years at high-school. The only experience I have is through writing fanfiction. I started back in 2012, and I've developed a lot since then. I started off small, writing horror short stories and little collections. Brotherhood was the first 'long fic' I created. I was shocked that it managed to get so big because I had never created a story of that size before. Writing helped me gain experience and figure out what worked and what didn't work, what I was good at writing, and where I was lacking and needed to learn. I don't think you can really experience an art form until you start doing it. You can learn all about the techniques and the conventions, but until you pick up a pen and start writing or drawing, you won't ever know what it means to create.

My literary inspiration has always been Stephen King. Which is funny, as he has described himself as 'having diarrhea of the typewriter.' I think that applies to me sometimes. I am a bit of a wordy writer, though I've started honing it down for certain stories. Sometimes, a story needs to be floral and descriptive, sometimes, it needs to be punchy and direct. So, King was my major inspiration, especially with horror. I also enjoy the works of Poe and Lovecraft (I acknowledge the problematic themes in the work of Lovercraft and seek not to praise him as a person. He was a terrible person for sure, but sadly, he had a way with cosmic horror that is hard to find.) I also enjoy Chuck Palahniuk and the dark, seedy and overall zany stories that he has created. I like his style a lot!

In terms of inspirations for House of Cards, I was obviously inspired by the films Infernal Affairs/The Departed. American Gangster and Training Day were also major inspirations (and also because I love Denzel Washington's performances in both films. I mean, who doesn't love him?) But I also drew inspiration from other sources that were less focused on gangs, more focused on the dark, nihilistic state of the world around us. I couldn't recommend the TV series True Detective hard enough. It is one of the best series I have ever watched. It handles dark and disturbing content so well, and its fractured, unreliable story-telling and philosophical musing is some of the best I've ever seen on screen. I highly recommend checking it out, but be sure to check the content warning and triggers because it certainly isn't suitable for younger audiences and those with triggers. In terms of real-life content, I think Ross Kemps' docu-series are very good. Particularly Extreme World and On Gangs. His docu-series show the dark and disturbing side of criminal activity, the drug trade and more. 

I became a fan of BTS [Bangtan Sonyeondan] back in 2013. I had already been a fan of K-Pop for some time by then, as I had started listening to various K-Pop and K-Rock artists back in 2009. I knew of their debut, but I had seen hundreds of new acts debut by the time that they broke into the scene, and so I didn't pay much heed. Someone I followed on Tumblr at the time kept posting about how much she loved them, especially Taehyung [BTS V/Kim Taehyung]. One day, I stumbled upon a gifset of Yoongi [BTS Suga/Min Yoongi] being sarcastic in one of their first interviews. I thought he was funny, so I decided to check them out. At the time, they had recently released We Are Bulletproof Pt. 2 [BTS’s second music video release with their debut album 2 Kool 4 Skool]. I followed them from that point, and their first comeback [A “comeback” refers to when a K-Pop idol group releases new music, usually done twice a year.] was also my first comeback. I liked their music [BTS released Boy In Luv and Just One Day in 2014, both music videos of songs from their Skool Luv Affair EP.], but I liked them even more as individuals. I loved watching their shows [Here is a link to BTS’s schedule during 2014 when they had their first comeback. You can find the shows and interviews they were on there.], even though they are incredibly embarrassing to look back on now. They just had so much energy and looked to be having so much fun that I was having fun just watching them. I was a fan, I liked a lot of their songs and followed their activities. But it wasn't until they released HYYH Part One [Hwa Yang Yeon Hwa Part 1 (Korean) = The Most Beautiful Moment in Life Pt. 1 (This is the title in English), released with the I Need U and Dope music videos.] that I really became a fan of their music. I had already created a couple of small horror stories for the fandom at that point. HYYH Part One [The Most Beautiful Moment in Life Pt. 1] inspired me so much that I created Brotherhood, my first 'long fic.' I joined AO3 [Archive of Our Own] and started posting there. I received so much support from fellow fans that I carried on writing, and the rest is history!

How has your experience being an ARMY [Adorable Representative MCs of the Youth, BTS’s global fan base name.] been? Did you ever leave the fandom then come back? How did you interact with others when you first got into the fandom and as you grew up?

How have you been since you wrote House of Cards? What have you been working on? 

Are you okay with talking about how old you are now and how old you were when you wrote House of Cards?

Before you even wrote House of Cards, what inspired it? Any TV shows? Music? Movies? Books? Ideas? It could be anything.

How did you start writing House of Cards? Did you finish the entire story then publish it or did you write it as you went? What was the writing process like?

Did you have any beta readers or editors? If you did, are you still in contact with them now? How did they feel about your work?

My experience being a fan has mostly been positive over the years. In the earlier days, back around when I first started writing for the fandom, it was certainly much more positive. I've received so much support over the years, not only in my writing but in my personal life from readers and fellow fans that being a fan of the boys [The members of BTS] really has changed my life. That's not an exaggeration. I doubt I would even be here now without those years having such a positive effect on my mental health. I've never really been the kind to interact with others and form cliques within the fandom, I just like being in my own space and interacting with everyone that comes my way, I guess?

These days, I'm not as active as a writer or in fandom spaces however. I feel like my time in the fandom has started to come up and I don't know how I feel about it just yet. I feel nostalgic for the time when I was first starting out in the fandom and I didn't really know much, but everything was fun. It doesn't feel so fun now, but I mostly contribute that to the effect that Twitter has had on shaping the fandom's growth. Twitter has never been a good place for creatives within fandoms because of issues with algorithms and such. Tumblr was always the better website for hosting artistic content for a variety of reasons. So, I think the fact that everything is on Twitter now has been partly responsible for my decline in engagement and overall enjoyment. I'm currently taking a break from Twitter. The next couple of months will be what makes me either stay or leave the fandom.

Since writing House of Cards, I've been an active writer in the fandom. Over the years, I've added quite a lot of stories to my AO3 accounts and various pseuds. My largest ongoing story is another gang story, set in the 1980s, called Valentino Summers. I actually started writing and publishing it on Ao3 just four or so months after I finished House of Cards—which is wild to think about. Finally finishing House of Cards seems like such a long time ago in my mind, and yet I'm still working on a story I created that same year! I like contributing horror stories to the fandom, especially in the Halloween period. I like publishing series in the month/upcoming weeks before Halloween—though I won't be doing so this year [2020].

When I started writing House of Cards, I would have just turned 22. It was inspired by the song 'Wires' by The Neighbourhood. I might be mistaken, but I believe that Jungkook [BTS Jungkook/Jeon Jungkook] posted a tweet with the song in it. [Jungkook did tweet about this song. Here is the English translation.] I had never heard of the band before, but my partner was a fan of their music. She sent the song to me and I was very interested in the lyrics, so I started discussing them with her. One thing led to the next, and then we had basically come up with the entire plot of the story. We just needed to create the characters. We spent a little while doing so, and then I started doing some research and started writing the story. There really isn't a grand backstory to House of Cards, it just happened so fast. We often come up with story ideas like that, and my partner is responsible for a huge amount of my stories. She has the creative visions, which I then turn into words. We make quite the team, haha~ The inspirations, I mentioned those in my previous answer regarding films and TV shows.

I published the story as I went, though I staggered the updates because I didn't want to post too frequently. I had the entire story planned out from the start——I didn't change a single aspect of the story no matter what I received in terms of feedback. I think a lot of readers assume that writers might tweak things if they sense the audience wants something to happen in terms of plot or relationships. Personally, I don't like doing that. I like sticking to my plans even if I know my vision might not be what the readers want. I think it's important for the story to be created the way I see it because my vision is what made me create it, if that makes sense.

The writing process was surprisingly smooth! You might not think it because the story is big and there are a lot of characters and plot threads to keep on top of, but it went smoothly for me. It flowed just as smoothly from start to finish as Brotherhood did. I never struggled once with writing the chapters, nor did I ever get stuck and wonder if I should change the content in order to make it easier to write. I'm surprised that I managed to complete it so easily because that's not the case with writing now! I tend to be a lot slower now, more deliberate and more open to changes in order to ease the process and the overall flow of the story. In a way, this change has been for the best. I do wonder what House of Cards would be like if I were to write it now, with my different approach to planning and writing. It would probably have a quicker flow, and the word count would either go down as a result of cuts, or go up because of additional scenes I would have likely included.

I didn't have any betas, which you can probably tell from the work. My stories are so big that I never wanted to put the burden of fixing them onto someone else. I know they are imperfect, oftentimes bloated things, but that's just what they are. I did try creating a story with another writer in the past, but it didn't go very well. She would often have conflicting opinions on things and would not have any leeway for anything I suggested, whereas I always had leeway to allow her to change things. Even to the point of completely changing the plot of the story that I had already started writing, and then allowing her to add graphic sexual content she didn't even want to be in the story. She actually stopped writing fanfiction randomly in the middle of us creating the story! She made a post about it being disgusting and nasty and then bowed out. I have no clue if she ever came back! So, my negative experience with attempting to work with someone else when creating a story kind of made me not want to have a beta. It's a wild story, I know!

House of Cards is praised for its realism and accuracy with weaponry, torture, sex, and violence. How did you research these things?

How did you come up with the gangster universe in House of Cards? How did you develop Haedogje Pa?

How did you name the original characters in House of Cards? Did any characters in particular take inspiration from existing characters in TV shows, anime, books, any type of media?

How did you decide on Vminkook as your main characters for the story? What do you see in their dynamic and them as characters?

Jimin is claimed to be one of the best written characters in the entire story. What was your thought process when characterizing him and developing him?

Taehyung is an especially dynamic character whose morals get tested time and time again in House of Cards. What was your thought process when characterizing him and developing him?

Jungkook is one of the characters that the readers spend the least amount of time getting a perspective from, but is incredibly well written in his character progression. What was your thought process when characterizing him and developing him?

When it came to various aspects in the story, I did do research. Most of it never really had an impact on the story itself. For example, I would be looking up gun models that are used by law enforcement agencies around the world and trying to find specs of them so I could learn how many bullets each gun held, or how much a magazine could hold. In action scenes, I didn't want my characters firing off 20+ bullets for a gun that—in reality—holds far less. That's a fact that doesn't really mean much to the average reader, but it meant something to me! I've always hated how many bullets fly through the air in action scenes in films and TV shows because I'm always wondering if it's possible with the firearms featured in the scene haha~ In terms of torture, I've come across the subject through various documentaries and TV shows about gangs, crime and serial killers. I didn't really do much additional research into the topic, beyond reading up on what I had come across to make sure it wasn't fictionalised for drama purposes. Obviously, there will be some lack of realism in my story because I couldn't possibly write a realistic portrayal of gang violence and torture when I have zero personal experience with it. My aim wasn't to give the story 'full' realism (I'll explain more about that in the next question) but to simply create a world that felt real, even if there were little aspects that had to be exaggerated for the sake of the story. Taehyung's behaviour when undercover certainly broke many procedures. The only thing working in his favour that allowed him to get away with it is that the crimes he committed couldn't be directly traced to him. But a real undercover agent would never do the things that he did on behalf of the gang. Basically, this means that the entire story is unrealistic! But of course, it wouldn't be very entertaining if Taehyung simply observed from the background and didn't dirty his hands. So, I had to bend and break the rules a little!

For the universe, I knew that I couldn't base it too much in reality. Because of basic Korean law, it would have been impossible for me to write the gang operating in the way they did in the story—especially with guns. Most Korean gangs tend to use other forms of violence and weapons in order to control their respective areas, rather than guns. My other story, Taste of Ink, has what I would consider a more realistic approach to gang activity—with the main weapons being knives, baseball bats, etc. and the main forms of violence being assault instead of flat-out murder. So, for the sake of allowing guns to appear in the story, I had to create a Neo-Seoul, so to speak. I took inspiration from Korean gangs, and mixed it with influences from other gang cultures in order to create 'Haedogje Pa.'

When it comes to naming original characters, I honestly don't put much thought into it. I like to use real names for inspiration. I often Google various Korean films I've watched and read the cast list in order to find interesting character and actor names. This is because I have a habit of reusing names sometimes. For example, readers of my stories might have come across a couple of Daesu and Goohee characters. Do you know where I got these names from? I picked Daesu from Oh Daesu - Choi Minsik's character in Oldboy. Goohee comes from the manhwa 'Let Dai' - he is the stubborn gang leader that actually has a good heart beneath his rough exterior. I ended up liking him the most by the end of the story, so his name is one that often comes to mind when I need to pick an original character name.

I never really consider real life dynamics when I'm writing because my stories are so detached from reality that it seems pointless including any inspiration from reality. I chose the three main characters simply because, at the time, they seemed to fit the character moulds the best. The other characters fit their respective characters so well (especially Namjoon [BTS RM/Kim Namjoon] and Yoongi) that I simply thought it was best to have Taehyung, Jimin [BTS Jimin/Park Jimin] and Jungkook as the three lead roles. I chose them more based on how I thought they could personally fit the characters, rather than focus on the dynamic. To use Taehyung as an example, I thought that he would fit the character of the informant in my story because in reality, he is intelligent and seemed like he would suit the role. For Jimin, I thought he would be a good choice for a character that some might think is vulnerable or even weak. He is actually very strong and the most important character for the plot progression. For Jungkook, I liked the thought of someone with such an innocent outer appearance hiding a dark secret.

I'm so glad that readers took to Jimin so positively on a whole. I know there are some that hated him, or that hated the fact I chose him for such a role (a 'negative' sex worker role). But Jimin is the most important character for the plot progression. It is through him that the entire plan finally culminates in the explosive finish. I wanted to treat him with care because I understood that his character could go very wrong if not handled correctly. It would have been easy for him to simply become nothing more than a sexual prop, should the story have focused too much on Taehyung and Jungkook as the key players. So, I decided to subvert it by giving Jimin the ultimate hand in the story and allowing him to have more control than Jungkook in the end. If Jimin had not decided to follow through with the plan, if he had decided to snitch or had simply refused to do his part in exposing the gang, the story would've ended drastically differently. But I also didn't want to write Jimin taking control of the entire situation at the end because it would've felt ingenuine. He is a character that has been deeply affected by a lifetime of trauma. I was worried that some might take my portrayal of his trauma the wrong way, and see him not as a character that has suffered immense mental damage but rather as an annoying, weak character that gets in the way of more 'interesting' dynamics. I'm sure there will be readers that think that. Mentally traumatized individuals are often seen in such negative light, be they fictional characters or real people. When writing his character, especially in the later scenes, I wanted to make sure the trauma he experienced would shape his behaviour. Writing the scene of him getting ready to leave, when he is taking his pills and he doesn't think he can do it, it was hard. It was hard getting into that headspace of feeling so powerless in the moment and knowing that freedom is in reach, but not knowing how to achieve it. He was a difficult character to write, but I think he turned out just right in the end.

Taehyung was probably the best character to write. I love characters that start off so morally upright and pristine, and by the end of the story, their backs are bending and close to breaking from the weight of their conscience and misdeeds. His character has many facets to him that made his perspectives so interesting to tackle. From his green days in the gang, where he is horrified by the violence he sees, to the changes in his psyche as he starts to become desensitized to it all. Fundamentally, Taehyung begins the story as a good man, a hero, but by the end, there is no black and white thinking. He has become grey, muddied from his time spent in the gang. Is he a hero for bringing them down? Would a hero do the things that he did in order to bring down the gang? He killed people. He tortured people. He threatened a man with a gun, a man he knew had a deepset fear of guns that would severely trigger him. I think it all depends on how the reader sees it. The hardest thing to write for his character was his troubled descent into the relationship between him, Jungkook and Jimin, and how it affects his thought processes and emotions. I didn't want House of Cards to be seen as a romantic story when I created it. If readers see it that way, they are more than entitled to their own interpretations. I cannot tell them how they can interpret my art, that is not my role as the creator. I don't know if I effectively portrayed the co-dependency between the three main characters as well as I would've liked. But I had never tackled such a story and themes before, and so it was all new to me.

I didn't know that Jungkook had the least perspective from the three main characters. Similarly, I never really put that much effort into creating and developing his character! Jungkook simply 'happened' in the moment. He would appear in the chapter, and then his character would basically take control of the scene. I never really knew what he was going to say or do beyond my rough plans for each scene. I just waited until he appeared and let the creative spirit flow through me. That's how he came to be! I've had that happen many times in the past with characters—they have a life of their own and I've no control over them. In my story, Brotherhood, Taehyung happened the same way. It was impossible to write his character in that story because he was so wild and free-spirited that it didn't feel right unless his behaviour was a total spur-of-the-moment reaction to the other characters and new plot points. But with Jungkook in House of Cards, I don't know why I didn't have him planned out like the others. It's interesting to think that he might've had a good progression when I never planned any of it in detail!

Were there any original characters you particularly liked writing or enjoyed?

When you wrote for the BTS hyung line, how did you determine their roles in the story and characterize each of them?

Is there a reason behind Namjoon saying “brother” or was it a consciously written character quirk?

When you handled more serious subject matter in House of Cards, how did you feel when writing it? Were you ever startled by your own work?

Was there any type of purposeful titling for the fanfiction chapters?

What was your reason for House of Cards’ open ending?

I liked writing Lim, the original informant that helped Taehyung join the gang. I like writing characters that come across as sleazy. In his case, the sleaze was all an act and wasn't true to his character; he was affecting it for the sake of creating a persona. But I enjoy writing absolute sleaze balls too—the kind of guys that have chest hair and wear gold chains and thick watches, who practically ooze oil. I just find them fun! Lim was a good teacher, even when he was rough around the edges. It was sad doing what I had to do to him for the sake of the plot. But I feel like Lim understood the game as well as everyone else, and so he knew he was running on borrowed time. 

Of course, I loved writing Bae Goohee too! He was an absolute bastard! I loved writing this figure that is spoken about throughout the story as a frightening man, one so brutal that the readers are already wary of him before he even appears in the story. I believe that Taehyung refers to him as a 'guard dog' at some point. I think Bae is the scariest character in the story for me because he is so ruthless and willing to do any order that the Jeon clan give to him. That kind of blind and unwavering devotion is frightening!

I also enjoyed writing Sungah and Jangmi. I think they're the only female characters in the story that have dialogue? Sungah has a great backstory that I unfortunately couldn't go into too much in the story, but it shaped her character a lot. I like how frank and intelligent she is—she holds her own even in a department filled with men that receive far more praise than she does simply because she is a woman. She also allowed me to add an angle about the unfair treatment of women in jobs that have power, drawing parallels with how Taehyung faces discrimination from his fellow officers when his sexuality is abruptly revealed during the investigation. As for Jangmi, I just liked writing about the wife of a mob boss! And not one that is simply a trophy wife, but actually has a lot of power and influence across the city. I wish I had been able to feature her more, alongside her husband, Jeon himself. But I like the scenes they appear in and I enjoyed writing them.

For the rest of the members, I had Namjoon and Hoseok [BTS J-Hope/Jung Hoseok]'s characters planned right from the start. I had also created plans for Yoongi and Seokjin [BTS Jin/Kim Seokjin], but I wasn't sure how much of a role they would play in the overall story. As I started writing them, I realised that Yoongi would play an important role in both Taehyung and Jimin's character development, and so he ended up featuring a lot more than I had expected. I planned their jobs and then let them influence how I would write them. Namjoon and Hoseok's characters came naturally. Yoongi's character completely took over his job role and basic description and became a really strong character that I'm proud of. Seokjin was a little trickier because he doesn't appear in too many scenes—but the scenes he does are integral to the plot. I needed to make sure that his character said everything he needed to in his limited scenes. He has quite the bombshell to drop after all! Seokjin was also tricky because I wanted him to have an air of mystery around him. I wanted him to be the kind of guy that not even Taehyung and his police connections would be able to unearth much about; a ghost in the system. I would've also liked for him to feature more in the story, but I feel like his character appeared in the essential scenes that the story needed. He was going to feature more in the planned sequel, being one of the first characters to appear alongside Yoongi. He was going to serve an important role, so I'm disappointed that I didn't get to show those scenes to readers.

With Namjoon, I wanted to portray him as a mature character, but not one that was conservative and stiff. I thought about having him say things like 'man' but that seemed too casual and didn't suit his character. 'Man' made him seem more like a surfer than a police officer. But when he said 'brother' in one of the scenes, I realised the word suited him better. It was fraternal, and it allowed him to show some affection towards the other characters without having to have physical contact with them. It's not the only Namjoon I've written that says 'brother' a lot. In Valentino Summers, Namjoon has experience with hippies in the neighbourhood that he lives in, so he also refers to other characters like Jimin as 'brother.' It just seems to suit him! I guess it's because I like creating Namjoon characters that are intelligent and mature, but still have a gentle and warm presence. I could picture him saying it in real life (I'm certain he already has!)

When writing serious subject matter, I'm surprised to admit that I was never shocked by what I was writing! I guess it's because I already knew that I was going to be handling dark themes. I wouldn't have tackled such subjects had I not felt comfortable doing so. Dark content isn't for everyone, and by that I don't simply mean consuming it. Creating it can be very difficult for some writers, and can even cause distress. It's not easy diving into a world that is filled with crime, pain and fear. It's even harder putting yourself into the shoes of a character that is suffering/has suffered. I was never writing in a desensitised state though. Far from it. I'm actually very sensitive to violence in reality. In fiction, it depends on the violence—but I'm usually not too affected by it. I've been a fan of horror since I was a child, and so I've seen a lot of nasty films filled with gore and 'shocking' deaths that never really had much of an effect on me. Unrealistic violence doesn't scare me. But when it comes to personal violence, that is always frightening to me. It's far scarier writing a scene where a character feels threatened by another character and doesn't know what is going to happen to them then, say, writing a scene of a character dying a bloody, ridiculous death in a horror story. Personal violence is much more realistic, therefore it is more unsettling to write. In House of Cards, the violence is very personal. It's in your face, it's inescapable for the characters that are involved in it. But at no point did I ever feel like I needed to stop writing because I was uncomfortable or scared by the content. If I had been uncomfortable, it would have been very reckless of me to continue writing the story.

My word of advice to fellow dark content writers: it's always important to recognise your own boundaries. There's nothing wrong with removing dark content from a story if you get a bad vibe or feel strange when writing/reviewing it. Always follow your gut instincts and never put out work that you don't like.

When writing stories, I vary between titling the chapters and leaving them blank. For House of Cards, I cannot remember the exact method for naming the chapters. Sometimes, the title comes to me when I am writing the plans and I have an idea that just suits the mood of the chapter. Other times, I have finished the entire chapter and I have to spend some time reviewing the content to decide that the title will be. In some cases, I have finished most of a whole story and I'm still not certain what to title it! I feel like with House of Cards, the titles came after the chapters were finished, or at least when they were works-in-progress.

There are some titles that really stand out to me. 'Nice Teeth' for example, is a really ridiculous title. Going into the chapter, I don't think many readers would've imagined what it could mean. 'Submachine Sodomy' is even funnier. I really can't believe I chose that as a title! I'll bet a lot of readers saw it and thought, "Oh no! Not another gunplay scene!" Luckily for them, it wasn't a reference to Jungkook's predilection for firearms in bed.

In terms of chapter titles that I really like: 'Delusions of Grandeur,' 'I Own This Fucking City,' 'Sleeping Dogs Bite' and 'Carpe-fucking-Diem.' I just feel like these titles are very well suited to the contents of the chapters. They are the kind of titles that have bite to them, that hint at action or an important plot point.

As for the open ending, there are a couple of reasons. First of all, I had planned to continue the story in a sequel that would pick up after the events of House of Cards, roughly a year on after the investigation. However, I did not pursue this sequel. I wanted House of Cards to end on an open note for the sequel to continue the story. When it comes to certain stories, I just feel that closed endings aren't always necessary. I often enjoy stories with open endings. With House of Cards, it didn't seem right just closing the book and saying it was over. There was still so much that needed to be explored. Unfortunately, I decided to not continue it. But I still think that House of Cards' ending fits the story.

Were there any scenes or moments or lines in House of Cards that you were particularly proud of or want to highlight?

If you were to write the Yoomin sequel to House of Cards, how would’ve that looked like?

How were readers’ reactions to your work in the beginning?

Did any reader comments stick with you in particular?

How did you take the criticisms and hatred towards House of Cards for its serious subject matter? When did those types of comments start appearing? Also, where did the hatred come from? Twitter? Tumblr? Ao3 comments? Did people harass you at all or hurt you? How did you heal from that?

House of Cards has a lot of scenes. I'm proud of most of them and I think I did the best I could when writing them. I do not really like the sex scenes, but that is because I wanted to write them in a dirty, sleazy way. If I could, I would change them. I like the action scenes, especially the Gold Monkey Casino and police raid scenes. Action scenes are hard to write! Fight scenes in particular are so tricky. I often sit there, choreographing the fights so I can describe them! I loved writing Yoongi's introduction to the story, when he walks into the scene wearing nothing but his underpants.

One scene that I really liked writing is the scene where Namjoon and Hoseok investigate the USB stick that Taehyung sends to them. I personally love Namjoon and Hoseok's characters. I always enjoyed writing them. In this scene, I liked getting to write them in a setting that was not the police department office. A scene where they got to relax and banter with each other, even though they were still working. They discover a horrifying crime ring in the city, but they are left with no choice but to keep it secret because they do not want to risk blowing Taehyung's cover. I do not know why I really like this scene, I just do.

In the sequel, which focused primarily on Jimin and Yoongi, the plans were to have them reunite through Seokjin—who has avoided jail time through a plea deal with the SMPA. They undergo a healing process together as they try to come to terms with what happened to them. Yoongi has a lot of unhealed trauma from his childhood, much like Jimin, which I only got to briefly touch upon in House of Cards. They grow closer from bonding over their traumatic experiences, and they become happier and healthier as a result. Taehyung and Seokjin were also going to be main characters, with Jungkook, Namjoon and Hoseok making supporting appearances over the duration of the story. It was going to be drastically different from House of Cards because it would be lacking in action and violence. It would have been much more intimate, with much more scenes of characters talking and discovering things about one another.

I cannot remember early reactions to the story, I just know they were positive. There was a lot of positive support from the start. As I updated and started to get more and more into the story, I received a lot of support on tumblr too. I started posting chapter previews there, as I used to get asks [On Tumblr, users are able to ask bloggers questions through an “Ask” function. This can be done anonymously or with their own blog username associated with the question.] requesting them. I got A LOT of asks on my original Tumblr from readers that wanted to discuss the characters and certain scenes. It was really interesting seeing just how much the readers were interested in the story, so much so that they wanted to learn even more about the characters and the universe I had created.

Through House of Cards, I have received comments and messages from readers that had addictions. They told me about how they recognised their own behaviors through Taehyung, and this helped them realise what was happening to them. Those comments stuck with me for obvious reasons. I have family members with addiction issues, and knowing that I could help some stranger I have never met before come to terms with their own addictive behaviours had a massive impact on me. Funnily enough, a negative comment stuck with me. It was not a bad comment, by no means meant to cause offence. It was a comment that was left on the story when I was posting the early chapters. I recall the reader asking when the story was going to pick up the pace because it was too slow. It stuck with me because, at this point in the story, Taehyung had already trained to become an undercover agent, had enrolled in the gang, had met and interacted with Jungkook, and had murdered a man. I was surprised that this amount of development had been seen as 'slow' by a reader, as I had thought the plot had been moving very fast.

I never really had any hate posted on the story when I was updating it. I got angry reactions when I had finished it. Because the story had not ended the way some readers had wanted, I think that was what caused the negative reactions. On my original Tumblr, I even got an ask about how an anon reader was going to write their own ending because my one was bad. I told them that I did not want them to take my story and change it like that. I have no idea if they ever posted the ending anywhere. The angry reactions were mostly from shippers, who were upset with the story not ending the way they had wanted. To them, I ask: what were you expecting from the story? I thought it was always obvious that Taehyung was going to do what he had set out to do from the start, so I do not think I misled readers at all. It was a story about an undercover agent taking down a gang—and that is what I wrote.

I know there was some animosity towards me on Twitter too. Twitter is a whirlpool of negativity, I am not surprised. Writing House of Cards made me appear problematic. My partner used to follow an author a long time back, who tweeted about me being problematic—despite having never interacted with me or admittedly read my stories. It was shocking to me that people were making assumptions of who I was as a person based on a story I created. I have never created stories with the aims of hurting or upsetting others. I am a very quiet and private person, and I hate the idea of hurting others. It was strange to me that people could assume me to be this cruel or even dangerous individual, intent on hurting others, because I created a fictional story. Do they think the same of script writers for television shows? Or film directors, who create films with dark subject matter? Do they think published authors are problematic people for writing dark and disturbing content? Do they think certain genres should not exist because they do not personally like them?

I do think it is strange that fan fiction writers are placed on these ridiculously high pedestals of moral absolutism. Fan fiction was created to be a space for creative outlet for marginalised individuals, particularly queer individuals. The heavy censorship of dark and unusual content is putting this entire ethos at danger. I understand not wanting to have certain topics included in stories because there is a risk that the content can be used for grooming or can be presented in a way that can negatively affect young consumers' perceptions (like pedophilia for example.) I certainly agree that there needs to be boundaries in place to stop the community from being flooded with such illegal content. But I think there is a difference between wanting to remove dangerous content, and wanting to get rid of content you do not like. Content can be problematic to you, but that does not make it dangerous, illegal, or bad. For some readers, the content they create is their way of dealing with trauma. Maybe this is not healthy for them. But that is their decision to make, not yours.

I orphaned the story because I did not want to handle the potential backlash. To put it simply, I do not handle negative criticism well. Not because I am stuck-up and think I am perfect, but because I am a very anxious person. Just reading angry comments makes me feel very uncomfortable, often nauseous. I know that House of Cards has received overwhelmingly positive feedback from readers, and for that I am thankful. But I had to distance myself for the sake of my own mental health. Since orphaning it, it exploded in popularity. I am thankful that I orphaned it because that amount of attention would frighten me a lot, haha~

What was your reaction to the fanfiction trailer by Sappiamur?

How did you come to the decision to reveal your real name in the end note of House of Cards?

How did you feel when you finished House of Cards?

How did you come to the decision to orphan House of Cards?

Did you ever anticipate the overwhelming fan reaction to House of Cards?

How do you feel knowing that House of Cards is one of the most read fanfictions on Ao3?

What do you want House of Cards to be remembered for?

What do you hope people take away from House of Cards?

Why do you think House of Cards became so popular?

I had to go back and watch it. It's been some time since I last have, and I'm still as amazed by it now as I was back then. The trailer is insane. I cannot imagine how much work went into making it. It's so good and it fits the vibes of the story to perfection. I think the first time I watched it, I was in shock. I must have repeated it at least 10 times in a row, just to make sure it was real and I wasn't imagining it. Then I think I screamed about it on my social media accounts, haha~ If you reading this have not watched the trailer, consider doing so. I promise you won't be disappointed.

Back when I first started posting fanfics, I used to get a lot of asks wanting to know my name, my pronouns, stuff like that. I thought by adding my name at the end of the stories, it would help cut down on these requests. But I also did so because I used to get a lot of asks referring to me as 'author-nim' and I didn't like being addressed by this honorific. I'm not Korean so I have no right to receive that honorific. So, I included my real name so readers could address me with it when sending me asks and interacting with me. I don't add my name at the end of my stories now, but my name is in my Twitter bio for those that want to know.

When I finished it, I felt relieved! I was so calm in the moment! Looking back on it, I can't remember much. But I do remember finishing House of Cards without any issues. The final chapters flowed smoothly, it all clicked into place, and I had a great time writing them.

I came to the decision to orphan the story after several nights of contemplation. I was considering deleting the story, along with a few others, but my partner and some friends told me I shouldn't do so. They suggested orphaning it instead. So, I did so. I didn't want to delete it in case readers that had started it had not gotten to finish it yet. I would've felt very mean robbing them of the opportunity to finish the story like that. I don't regret orphaning it instead of deleting it. I didn't want to destroy the story, I just needed some distance between me and the story.

I didn't anticipate it, and I still don't understand it! I'm shocked that House of Cards got the reaction that it received. Do I think it's a good story? Yes, I think that I worked hard to create a story that is enjoyable to read. But did I ever think it would get the reaction it did? Not in a million years! I thought that it would be one of my more popular stories because a) the pairings and b) the content. Gang stories usually tend to get a lot of attention because it's a popular genre in fanfiction. I just didn't expect it to reach such a vast amount of hits, kudos and comments.

I'm in shock that it is one of the most read stories on AO3. I don't think I will ever be able to create another story that will garner that kind of attention and feedback. It's a once in a lifetime thing, so I'm immensely proud of myself for achieving such a feat. But really, it's all because of the readers that it achieved such a goal. I'm so thankful for every single one of them.

I just want it to be remembered for being enjoyable, I think. I don't have any grand and lofty ambitions for the story. I think so long as the readers enjoyed it, that is all that matters.

I'm not sure what I would like readers to take away from House of Cards. I guess I want them to reflect on the idea of morality and that not everything is black-and-white. Good people can do bad things, and bad things can happen to good people. It's hard to answer this question because House of Cards isn't a story that I consider to have deep messages in it? There are no messages about acceptance and love and healthy relationships and such, like some of my other stories.

Honestly? I don't know what made it get so popular. I assume it's because of the pairings or the setting of the story. I know that a lot of readers say they love the story because of how well it's written, but I can't comment on that as the creator, haha~ I can't say my story is well-written as I'm not consuming it from an outside perspective. What I can say is that I do think I created a story that has a lot of twists and turns and betrayals, which I think adds to the enjoyment factor.

How are you now in 2020? Are you writing professionally in real life at all? 

How do you feel BTS fanfiction has changed over time? Since you’ve been writing for it for so long. 

Do you have any messages for people who may read this interview in the future?

I'm not writing professionally. I have self-published two books via Amazon and Lulu. One was a basic re-branding of my story babes in the woods. The other was a total rewrite of Brotherhood, which I called 'Brothers,' featuring a whole new setting and roster of characters. I published them as readers showed an interest in reading original stories. I have been considering rewriting House of Cards as an original work in the future, but I can't say for certain that I will do so.

Since I started writing, I think there's been a lot of changes in the fandom—not only in fanfiction but in general. There's been popular trends that have come and gone (I was around for the explosion of social media and text-based AUs, which I personally am not a fan of) but there's also been a lot of push for more inclusive content. I'm really happy by the amount of inclusive content that I see these days. Despite some pushback from non-queer fans that sometimes have an issue with queer subject matter (for example, trans characters) I think it's wonderful that artists of all colours, genders and sexualities are now proudly creating content they want to see, and not simply just what is 'in demand' from the fandom.

The message that I would like to share with readers of this interview is: stay healthy, stay happy, and most importantly, stay you. I also want to take this moment to tell them this - if you are considering becoming a creator, but you are worried about reception to your work, or that it might not be good enough, stop right now! Stop doubting yourself and just give it a shot! I was once like you, scared that my weird and niche interests and writing would be ignored or even mocked by the fandom because no one would like it. Had I not decided to take the plunge, my life would be so drastically different. I've made so many friends, fallen in love, and completely changed my life by creating fan content. It can be scary, but once you take the leap, you will find your feet coming down on solid earth without any danger.

Thank you for reading this interview. Further below are reminders and information about this interview and Charmseoul’s Fanlore project.

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This interview is a part of the Top 50 Most Hit BTS Archive of our Own Works Project by Charmedseoul. The project documents the works and authors of the top 50 most hit BTS works on Archive of Our Own. All work for this project is done through Fanlore, which is run by the Organization of Transformative Works. However, Charmedseoul herself is not associated with Fanlore or OTW directly. All information documented through this project is done with full transparency.

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[riversofmars]

Happy Sunday, everyone!! <3 Here is the next encounter of the “Big, Vast, Complicated and Ridiculous“ Series! Round two at Luna U... just a bit earlier! ;)

Rating: General

Word Count: 1800

Read on AO3 or below

Luna University Part II

“Mind out!“ The Doctor stumbled back into the broom closet she’d parked and hidden her TARDIS in. The warning came just in time as someone zoomed past on a hoover board, nearly taking her head off.

“Alright then…“ The Doctor closed the closet door quickly in the hopes no-one would notice where she’d come from. She looked around and wondered if she’d taken a wrong turn in the vortex somewhere. Luna University - which this quite clearly was, she recognised the corridor from her visit just now - resembled a mad house. The corridor was a mess, there were paper cups and spilled drinks, abandoned books, half eaten dinners and items of clothing. “Oh no…“ The Doctor winced as she realised where and most importantly when she had arrived: Fresher’s week.

Slowly the Doctor made her way down the corridor, unsure of what to do next. River had to be here somewhere… She rolled up the manuscript and stuck it into her coat pocket for safe keeping. If she had calculated correctly and the TARDIS hadn’t messed with her flight plan again, River should be in her final year of her degree. An upper classman who surely should be above something as silly as freshmen parties… but this was River Song as a uni student… Young, wild… and currently downing a drink at some speed as the Doctor reached the communal area of the the student halls.

“Where… do-do you put all… that…“ The student River had apparently been competing with could hardly get his words out right and he spilled the remainder of his drink across the table.

River jumped out of the way of the liquid and laughed, shaking out her impressive mane of hair.

“I have a theory that in addition to an extra heart, there’s also an extra liver hiding in there somewhere.“ River retorted with a winning smile drawing laughter from the surrounding students.

The Doctor hung back, watching. River appeared to be in her element. Loud, bold, people were fawning over her and she was loving the attention. The Doctor chuckled to herself a little, remaking again on the vast contrast to the River she’d last met. It was remarkable how much she had changed with time and how much she had stayed the same as well.

“But before we go for another round, I do have one question…“ River took a sip of the gin and tonic  someone handed to her. “You, Darling, don’t go to this university, I would have noticed.“ River turned to look at the Doctor who jumped, startled, not expecting her to notice her at all. “So what are you doing here?“

“I uhh…“ The Doctor didn’t know what to say, she looked around to make sure River was actually referring to her. Suddenly all eyes were on her as she hovered in the doorway.  

“I mean, I’m not one to complain when a cute girl turns up on my doorstep…“ River smirked making her way over, leaving her admirers behind disappointed.

“River…“ The Doctor forced a smile, wondering how to best approach this situation. She thought back to the Maldovarium. River had indicated she’d met her then so this must have been that encounter.

“I see my reputation precedes me as usual.“ River smirked, flicking her hair over her shoulder. “And you are?“ She placed her hand on the doorframe, baring her way.

“Jane… Smith…“ The Doctor answered slowly, trying to keep the chronology intact.

“You expect me to believe that, Jane Smith?“ River burst out laughing as she seized her up. “Why have I never seen you around campus before?“

“Recent transfer.“ The Doctor retorted quickly, feeling the pressure.

“Is that so.“ River tilted her head to one side and grinned like a cheshire cat. “What is it you study, Jane Smith?“

“Archeology.“ The Doctor answered, hoping that was her best play.

“Isn’t that one hell of a coincidence.“ River hummed, stepping a little closer still. Close enough to make the Doctor inch back nervously.

“Yes, I know, that’s why I… I was hoping we could talk… professionally.“ The Doctor glanced over her future wife’s shoulder to the other students that were watching curiously.

“Well, Sweetie, you can talk to me any time but no promises I’ll be keeping it professional…“ River husked with a smirk that made the Doctor blush and her hearts beat a little faster. So this was what young River Song was like. She hadn’t had much of a chance to get to know her at the Maldovarium but maybe there was an opportunity now… The Doctor had just spent a wonderful night with her wife but still, she was drawn to this brazen version of her just as strongly. The River she had seen just now she’d known very well, but this young River, she didn’t, at all.

If the Doctor didn’t give herself away, as the older River had suggested, it would be a glimpse at what she was like when she thought no-one was watching. When she didn’t have to be good River Song, the wife of the Doctor, but her unpolished, unfinished self… so full of energy and mischief. It was alluring in a totally different way to the loving safety and warm comfort her older wife had given her.

“Well, maybe you don’t have to.“ The Doctor found herself saying, silencing all her contradicting thoughts about what she should or shouldn’t do. Why not live a little?

“How about that drink then, Jane Smith?“ River appeared delighted, she reached out and ran her fingers along one of her yellow braces.

“Sure, yeah…“ The Doctor nodded, her throat was getting rather dry after all.

“Outstanding.“ River grinned and went to fetch her a drink. The Doctor remained standing in the doorway, unsure whether to follow her or not. She felt everybody’s eyes on her and it was making her uncomfortable. “There you are.“ River returned moments later, placing a glass in the palm of her hand before stroking her fingers up the Doctor’s arm with a grin.

“How about we take it somewhere more quiet so we can talk?“ The Doctor asked, very much aware of their audience and she wanted to have River to herself. River raised her eyebrows with a smirk, this was infinitely more easy than she had anticipated but she wasn’t going to complain.

“Come along then.“ She grabbed the Doctor’s hand and pulled her down the corridor to a chorus of disappointed calls of the students they were abandoning.

From there, things happened very quickly, quicker than the Doctor had anticipated. River shoved her up against her dorm room door once she’d closed it and assaulted her lips with her own. The Doctor gasped, overwhelmed, spilling her drink over the both of them.

“Ah well, that’s a shame, we’re gonna have to take our clothes off now.“ River smirked. She slid her jacket off her shoulders and threw it onto her chair, then pulled her tank top over her head and off. The Doctor just stared at her, her head spinning. It was silly really, she knew every inch of her wife’s body very well but the way this young River was advancing towards her, flipping her hair back…

“I uhh…“ The Doctor tired her best to look at her face, not her lacy bra. Her mouth went dry.

“Something the matter, Sweetie?“ River hummed as she slowly pushed the Doctor’s coat off her shoulders, she pressed her lips to her throat, trailing wet kisses down to her collar bone. The coat fell to the floor and River pushed her hands under the Doctor’s t-shirt, running her fingers up her stomach.

“Oh crap…“ The manuscript the Doctor had left in her coat pocket had fallen out and spilled over the floor. The Doctor pulled away from River and bent down to pick it up before the pages could get mixed up.

“Lost something?“ River asked in amusement, watching her scramble around the floor. She bent down as well and picked up a couple of pages. “What’s this?“ River frowned, her voice suddenly far more serious as she skimmed the pages. “Is this some kind of a joke?“

“Uhh… no, this is…“ The Doctor didn’t really know what to say, she hadn’t gotten as far as that in her planning of this trip. Was she supposed to just tell her her future self sent this with kind regards?

“Cause this is exactly the topic I’m planning to write my thesis on, I’ve got notes detailing this section and… What is this? Where did you get it?“ There was no small measure of distrust in River’s voice now as she demanded an explanation.

“This is actually why I’m here…“ The Doctor decided it was best to just come clean, she knew River would be able to tell if she was lying. “There is someone out there that wants you to have it. Save you some time…“ She tried to explain.

“Someone? I haven’t told anyone about my topic yet!“ River countered.

“Well, it’s not just anyone…“ The Doctor gave an apologetic smile but River’s expression just grew more suspicious. “Okay fine, your future self asked me to take this to you. You wrote this yourself but a long time from now. Happy?“ The Doctor sighed, hoping the revelation wouldn't have any consequences. She figured technically, River would eventually have to find out it was her that wrote the thesis for herself, so she would know to write it in the future.

“That… does sound like something I would do…“ River admitted taking the rest of the papers, mulling over whether or not to believe her.

“I’m just the messenger.“ The Doctor held her hands up defensively. “You do with this what you like.“

“So… if you know my future self… you must be from my future, too.“ River stood up and so did the Doctor.

“Oh, no, no, who’s to say your future self didn’t come to visit me?“ The Doctor countered quickly, she knew she shouldn’t be telling her too much.

“I’m saying that.“ River pointed out, jabbing the pages at her. “And that means, either you have access to time travel or you know someone that does!“

“Now listen… River…“ The Doctor could virtually see the gears turning in her future wife’s head.

“Who are you?“ River asked suspiciously. “Your name is not Jane Smith, that’s for sure.“

“I think I best get going.“ The Doctor picked up her coat quickly. “This was great, really nice, but…“ She fumbled with the door knob.

“How did you get here? What’s your means of travel?“ River carried on, intrigued. “And how will we know each other?“

“I was really hoping we could have a bit more time for this one…“ The Doctor sighed, realising this was just another fleeting moment. “Sorry about this.“ She knocked the pile of papers out of River’s hand, sending them flying to distract her future wife long enough so she could bolt.

[rxbelling-hxrald]

Random question time! What inspired u to start rping Dan? ^__^

That’s quite a big question actually, the short answer is just one day I stumbled across people roleplaying on here and having fun. I kinda wanted to be involved and threw my hat in the ring, it was the Sonic RPC that mostly took me on so I sorta just remained in the fold.

But there is a bigger answer to really explain it so if you or others are interested on my thoughts as to how and why Dan came a thing and led to this, then read on.

Now yes I had Dan created for quite some time before I got onto tumblr to begin with but I’d never created him for the sake of roleplay itself, originally he was created more as a means to explore things in my own mind, I enjoy the depths of morality and what that really means. At the time I was really into demons but I found it funny they were usually always depicted as soulless evil so I looked further into things and questions rose if it were possible these representations were solely the case because of a manner of expectation that we usually throw into place. Nearly everything in media classified as ‘Dark’ is evil, but why? I’m going off topic a little here but here’s to give an idea of what I was thinking like. For example in LOTR there’s purely good and evil sides, but those who were once good and turned evil including those turned through no choice of their own were to be treated as cruelly as the genuine article. Such as the Nine Men (The Ringwraiths) twisted by Sauron via the corruption/control of the One Ring, They weren’t inherently evil until their souls were corrupted and while they did commit terrible and evil acts for their new master it wasn’t exactly by their choice (Yes I know in LOTR its more that Man’s greed is what causes them to fall but those original rings given to the kings they were fooled by Sauron in the first place and didn’t know what was about to happen until it was too late, it wasn’t a case of giving into temptation, they were just cursed practically.) Sauron did that to them, dooming them and yet there is no redemption for them in the eyes of the divine or the good side in general. On the other side of the coin, we have Orcs, otherwise brutal and barbaric species and yet by the same law, they technically don’t get born or created to serve Morgoth/Sauron or be evil, so to some degree there is a possibility that ‘good’ Orcs exist, but we never encounter them in stories due to them either being weeded out and killed or even being slain by the ‘good’ factions believing they are hostile under the premise of the usual ‘Foul Orcs’ and etc, either way they are doomed to be so cursed by all sides purely for how they were made?

Some people in things are naturally chaotic, so I don’t think its impossible to have the exceptions to the rule in other stories too. A ‘good’ character can still act as evil and vice versa. I know this seems out of the topic but this is the kind of stuff that made me create and think of Dan.

What does a potentially ‘evil’ species do when naturally they’re not? How does it subvert expectations in general, how would people react on both sides? how would the odd one think? and so on. So I made Dan with the intention of finding my own answer, its why I made him to be able to interact with pretty much anyone and anything, because to me its interesting to see how people/characters react, be they better or worse.

So after seeing those people roleplaying on here, I made an account and threw Dan at people, hoping to try and get things started. Things were slow and they make sense why now. I had no real idea how to RP so naturally people were more thrown off, the blog wasn’t organised and there was practically little to no information, not to mention the fact he was pretty darn OP. I had created Dan solely to explore the morals and mental aspects, I hadn’t thought of the character himself originally. So after watching others and listening to those who actually did give me a chance, I took a step back and worked on my own little universe. Its not like its a master work but I do think it makes enough sense to why Dan is the way he is and how he can crossover into nearly any universe while simultaneously building his character/personality further overtime to encounters he has with people. It thanks to all of those who previously played with me he’s turned out the way he is now.

Now, Its hard to stay away fully honestly, always stalking to see what’s happening and such. I love seeing what people come up with and if there’s chances for some fun with Dan, even better!

Sorry for going on and on, but to understand the inspiration and my original aims, you kinda have to know all that stuff.

[wreckofawriter]

Smelling Sweet

Pairing: Fred Weasley x reader

Word Count: 1,693

Warnings: None

Request: Can you do 8 with Fred Weasley x Reader? (And use someone other than George to make Fred confused?) lol

#8: "Sorry, I thought you were someone else."

A/n: This one was fun to write, feel free to request more!

The truth was you couldn't wait to get back to Hogwarts. You had never been more excited to get to school. You haven't seen your best friend all summer. He had gone to America to see his grandparents, so you were waiting to see him. The two of you had been inseparable since you met 1st year and not being with him for months was quite difficult.

You glanced around platform 9 ¾ anxiously. Where was he? You craned your head to see above the other faces with no luck. You groaned in frustration lugging your suitcase behind you. He had to be here somewhere. You heard your cat hiss behind you.

"Shut it Church." You murmured.trying to catch a glimpse of the boy you missed so dearly. You were about to give up when you caught a glance of his fiery red hair.

You shrieked with glee and ran towards him. When you were about 3 meters behind him you dropped your suitcase and jumped onto the boys back. "I've missed you so much!!" You yelled as you did so.

The first thing you noticed was that he was taller, he also smelled different, less like his usual pine sent and more like sweets and chocolate.

Only when you heard a yell of surprise did you realize, this wasn't Blake.

You quickly removed your arms from their neck and leept off their back stumbling and almost falling before a hand wrapped around your wrist yanking you towards them before you fell.

So now you were face to face with an extremely attractive boy you recognized as one of the Weasley twins.

Your face washed a deep red as he smiled down at you.

"Hello." He said sweetly, god his voice was smooth.

"I-i’m so s-sorry" you managed to stutter out your face growing increasingly red, "Sorry, I thought you were someone else"

"My brother I'm guessing?" He smirked, making you flush impossibly more.

"U-uh no actually my friend." You stuttered out trying to get away from the striking boy a quickly as possible.

"Oh." He seemed surprised, "I'm Fred by the way."

"I'm really sorry Fred," you said trying not to stare at his deep brown eyes. He on the other hand was taking no such courtesy. His eyes were roaming over your body and he still hand grasped in his large one.

"It's no problem, we should do it again some time." He winked still with that intoxicating smirk plastered on his soft pink lips.

"U-u-uh" you felt your heart begin to beat faster as you tried to untangle your tongue.

"Cat got your tongue?" A voice behind you asked.

You spun around to face another Fred Weasley who was of course George.

"Shove off George." The older twin hissed at his reflection.

"What? I can't talk to the pretty girl?" George asked his brother over your head. And you swear you were the replica of a tomato.

Fred sighed and rolled his eyes he was about to open his mouth to say something when you saw your escape. You yelled startling both boys and sprinting towards a different red-headed boy.

"BLAKE!" You screeched as he dropped his trunks and opened his arms to engulf you in a hug. You smiled into his pine sent not seeing the ugly glare thrown your way or more specifically Blake's way, by a certain twin.

"Oh my god you have no idea!" You yelled filling your mouth with jelly slugs. "Stop laughing! It was really embarrassing." You said smiling while slapping his arm lightly.

Blake continued his laughter despite your protests. "You jumped on him!?" He squeaked out before doubling over in a fresh wave of laughter.

"Yeah, yeah i jumped on him." You said rolling your eyes playfully.

"Come on it's funny!" He giggled, snatching a chocolate frog from its case.

"It was so not! I jumped on him hugged him from behind and then he had to catch me because I almost fell jumping off him!" You yelled trying to be mad at him and failing when he spit out his chocolate frog in laughter.

When Blake finally pulled himself together, he asked, "I'm kinda mad you didn't recognize me."

You gasped, "That is not fair! You both have red hair!"

"So!" Blake was now playfully yelling q tooth grin plastered on his face, "he is way taller than me!"

"I thought you grew, but turns out you're still short!" Now you were laughing tears pricking at your eyes.

"How long did it take you to figure out it wasn't me?" He asked searching though your pile of candy.

"Pretty quickly, he smells...," you paused, Blake had stopped looking through the pile of mostly wrappers and was now looking up at you an unreadable expression placed on his face.

"You were going to say better weren't you."

"What! No!" You gasped, "he just smelted different." You shrugged trying to hold back the blush on your face.

"Well what did he smell like?" He asked. You scoffed thinking he was joking but looking up at him he wasn't smiling or joking he was serious.

"Umm I don't know." You were definitely blushing now. Blake raised his eyebrows waiting for you continue.

"I guess he smelt sweet," you finished looking down at your box of Berries Every Flavored Beans placed in your lap. "like chocolate and candy." You finished your face hot.

"And what do I smell like?" He asked. Yous started laughing, then when he didn't join you looked back at him. "I'm serious."

"Oh, umm" you closed your eyes for a second envisioning Blake's scent. "I guess you smell like a forest, pine scent, like sap."

Blake paused for a moment, "Oh." And for the first time in years the two of you rested into an awkward silence.

You looked up at him trying to see what was different or restart the conversation but you were interrupted by a loud knock. Your head snapped to the glass door where you could see a pair of red headed twins standing there. You stood up opening the door.

"Hello?" You said in a questioning voice.

"Hi," the twin you were assuming was Fred smirked.

You waited for him to say more but no such thing happen, instead after a few seconds of Fred just looking at you, his brother stepped forward and explained,

"Sorry but we need a place to sit, we sort of pranked Crabbe and his Gyole so we needed to go somewhere they won't find us. Can we sit here?"

You paused for a second before saying, "I don't see why not."  You moved away from the doorway to see Blake glaring at the twins.

"Ahh, you must be the lucky bloke who she was planning on jumping on." Fred joked, you flashed bright red and Blake's hair began to match his face.

"I'm Blake Summers." He said sticking out his hand.

"Fred Weasley." Fred answered grabbing his hand and shaking it firmly, "and that's my brother George."

With that you all sat down in the cabin, Blake to your right and Fred across from you next to the window.

"So your from Ravenclaw right?" George asked.

"Yeah." Blake answered and with that the conversation went on.

For the rest of the ride the four of you talked of various topics from the new DADA teacher to pranks the twins have constructed. The whole time you could feel Fred's eyes locked on you. It was quite uncomfortable and you squirmed under his gaze.

Finally, the train came to a stop. You had by that time changed into your robes and was ready to leave. You grabbed your trunks and Church, who had been sleeping most of the ride. You all stood up, Blake and George who were in a deep argument about the Decree for the Reasonable Restriction of Underage Sorcery, exited while Blake was saying, "Come on, if we were allowed to use magic at any age a six year old would accidentally kill someone."

You were about to continue forward as well when a smooth hand incased your wrist a delicate yet firm hold.

You turned around and were face to face with those big brown eyes you had been trying to avoid for the past 2 hours. Now that they were straight in front of you, your knees went weak and you almost stumbled and fell. You face was washed with crimson and you gulped harshly trying to breath properly.

Fred saw what he did to you immediately, he bit the bottom of his lip to keep from laughing at your flustered form and it sure didn't help, he was unfairly handsome.

"Hi." He said his ginger hair falling in his face as he looked down at you.

"H-hi" you responded tightening the grip you had on your trunk and cat carrier.

"So I was wondering if you wanted to go to the first Hogsmeade trip with me?" He asked playing with the ends of his robes as he did.

You gasped a bit before nodding, "Sure." You told yourself to keep your cool as you answered the boy in front of you, when you really felt like whooping with joy.

His face lit up at your answer. "Really?!" He smiled.

"Yeah, why wouldn't I?" You questioned.

"I thought you like that Blake kid for a while and I got real scared"

"Oh no," you blushed, "Blake and I are just friends."

"Great, I'll see you later?" Fred asked.

"Yeah, see ya later." You said smiling. You turned to leave but before you could your wrist was caught again.

"Wait y/n" Fred stopped you whipping him to face him.

"What's up Fred?" You asked.

You were answered by his lips on yours. Your eyes widened in surprise before slipping shut and enjoying the feeling of his soft lips. You dropped your trunk and cat carrier with a protest from Church and brought your hands up to his neck as his found your waist. He tasted how he smelled; sweet.

When you finally broke away you gasped for air.

"Sorry." Fred smiled apologetically, "I just couldn't wait."

Masterlist

[btxtreads]

country boy - kth

Pairing: Kim Taehyung x Reader Word Count: 9.4k Genre: fluff, smut, Cowboy!Taehyung Rating: +18 Trigger Warnings: oral (m-receiving), fingering, denied orgasm, penetrative sex, delayed orgasm, unprotected sex (pls wrap it b4 u tap it), just rlly cringey smut im sorry Banner Credits: Thank you so much for @kimtaehyunq​ of the Bangtan Headquarters Editing Team for this banner! It’s so pretty??? ajshjsahjsa

*some scenes inspired by the Hannah Montana movie and Girl Meets Texas because I have no country knowledge. I just felt the cowboy Taehyung spirit*

The tranquil plains and farmlands was nothing like the tall, concrete buildings and noisy traffic-filled roads that Y/N was used to.

Her eyes almost rolled back in exasperation as the car rolled onto a driveway leading up to a decently-sized wooden house complete with horses and a small cabbage patch at the side.

The perfect image that describes country.

Y/N’s father turned and faced her with a grin.

“We’re home, pumpkin,” he said.

“Right,” Y/N tried to smile—she really did, but she couldn’t. How could she?

Her father told her that he was going to England for three months for his job—which Y/N was totally fine with. What she didn’t understand was why she couldn’t go with, or at the very least stay in her house alone with her dad.

Why did she have to stay back with her grandmother?

Y/N stepped out of the car, a pained smile on her face as she watched her father unload her suitcases from his car.

“Alright, I’ll see you in about—ten weeks?” her father asked as he handed off the suitcases to Y/N who only sighed.

“Dad, I really don’t get why I have to stay here.” Y/N said, her eyes darting around the area. “I could’ve stayed with mom.”

Y/N’s father’s eyes turned sad.

“Honey, your mother’s busy—“

“Ah, yes. Too busy fucking her boyfriend to house her daughter for three months. I forgot.”

“Y/N!” Her father chastised to which Y/N only rolled her eyes.

“Why can’t I just stay alone at home? Or go with you?” Y/N sighed. “Why here?”

The two’s heads turned as the door to the house opened, revealing Y/N’s grandparents with a wide smile.

“Because you haven’t been back here since the divorce three years ago. Grandpa and Grandpa really miss you.” Her father explained softly.

Y/N only sighed, looking up at the sky in frustration.

“Whatever, let’s just get this over with,”

She now has to spend three months in the country. No friends, shitty wifi, no way out.

Except maybe an unruly horse.

Y/N sat in the living room, her father long gone as he drove back to the city for his flight the following morning.

Her grandmother came carrying a small platter of freshly baked cookies.

“Still hot!” She said as Y/N smiled softly.

No matter how much she despised the country now, she would never tell her grandparents.

Her grandparents were her only anchor during her parents’ divorce—her grandmother a total sweetheart who bakes cookies and cakes for all her cravings and her grandfather being a tad enthusiastic in learning the ins-and-outs for all her passions and interests.

No, this was the least she could do—pretend she was having at least a decent time.

Y/N gulped and took a cookie.

“Thanks, grandma.”

“Oh, and I invited some of your friends over, by the way.” Her grandfather said, appearing at the doorway to the kitchen. “Thought you’d want to catch up with them, kid.”

“I have friends?” Y/N asked, raising her eyebrow. “Who?”

“Oh dear, Jin, Hoseok, Namjoon and Chaeri, remember?” Her grandmother asked, furrowing her eyebrows.

“Ah, them.” Y/N nodded.

She supposed the three of them were her friends—in a way.

Friends she hasn’t spoken to since she was ten.

There was a series of knocks at the door which made Y/N flinch.

“Ah, reckon that’s them. You should get the door, honey.” Her grandmother said, moving towards the kitchen. “I’ll leave you children be to chatter.”

“Okay, thanks.” Y/N shrugged, standing up to get the door.

She was greeted with a tall boy with slicked back hair, a plaid polo, and a heart-shaped smile.

“Howdy,”

“Hello, Hoseok.” Y/N smiled softly backing away and waving him in as she peeked at his companions. “Seokjin, Namjoon, Chaeri. Come in!”

“Oh, it’s Hobi, Jin, Joon and Chae,” Hoseok said, waving nonchalantly as he took a seat on the couch. “We’re friends!”

“Sure,” Y/N shrugged, closing the door as she took a seat on the armchair opposite Hoseok. “We haven’t talked in like—what, fifteen years? Felt awkward to call you that.”

“Once friends, always friends,” Namjoon smiled as Jin nodded along.

“So, how have you been, how’s the city treating you?” Chaeri asked, leaning over. “Any cute city boys you wanna tell me about?”

As Y/N chuckled, Jin scoffed at the Chaeri.

“Please, I’m the most handsome person you’d ever meet. Y/N probably hasn’t found anyone handsome since me.” Jin commented.

“Ah, yes. Worldwide handsome, I think i remember.” Y/N nodded.

Jin grinned, pointing finger guns at the girl.

“Well, the city’s been great. I got a lot of great friends, and met a lot of cute guys, Chaeri—but no one as handsome as you, Jin.”

“See?” Jin boasted, grinning at his friends.

“I’ve seen handsomer,” Chaeri commented.

“I’m your boyfriend!” Jin gasped, appalled. “I should be the most handsome creature in the entire planet for you!”

“You guys are dating?” Y/N smiled, tilting her head.

“Yeah, and they’re disgusting.” Hoseok stuck his tongue out at the couple.

“They’ve been dating since two years ago—they’re pretty clingy.” Namjoon commented, to which Chaeri tutted.

“Yeah, no. Jin is clingy—I’m not.” Chaeri shook her head and pushed a whining Jin away.

“Anyways, how have you guys been here?” Y/N asked, changing the topic.

“Ah, good enough,” Hoseok shrugged.

“The old plains we used to hang around in became a pub. Oh, and Hansul’s sister went to the city to train to be a famous idol.” Namjoon recalled.

“Is she?” Y/N asked.

“Yeah, also our grade school teacher—remember her?—got remarried for the fourth time after you left,” Hoseok shared.

“Again?”

“Yes! The guy had a son, about our age—Taehyung. They moved here weeks after the marriage.” Chaeri gossiped. “Took the town by storm,”

“Took the town’s girls by storm,” Jin huffed.

“Ah, let me guess. A fuck-boy?” Y/N asked.

“Not really, he doesn’t really mind them much. Never really saw him flirt back to any of them—spare a girl or two.” Namjoon shrugged, leaning back.

“Ah, a heart-throb, then?”

“Sure,” Hoseok said. “You could call him that,”

“Hm,” Y/N said, shaking her head before shooting the group a  mischievous smile—changing the topic. “So, tell me something—Does Namjoon know how to saddle a horse now?”

“Maybe if he didn’t keep breaking saddles every day.”

“Hey!”

It was hours after Jin and Chaeri they had to go for a date night, which prompted Hoseok and Namjoon to leave as well.

Y/N then decided to go out on her own to familiarize and acclimatize to her childhood home—after all, she’ll be here for three whole months.

It’s been two hours of aimless wandering when she reached the field she used to play with her friends when she was younger.

Her eyes landed on the big wooden-building with the big signboard that said “Big Billy Restaurant and Pub.”

“Oh, so, this is the new pub,” Y/N said to herself.

Moments later, a boy—about her age—stumbles out of the pub wobbly and red-faced, with a bottle of whiskey still in hand.

It was a look Y/N knew from her time in the city—he was shit-faced drunk.

Y/N chuckled, gazing at the boy who seemed to have had more alcohol than he could handle.

As soon as she turned around to leave, she could hear him clearly scream “you!” from the top of his lungs.

Y/N jumped in her spot and turned, raising an eyebrow. “Me?”

“Yes, you,” The boy said, clutching the beer in his hands. “youuuuuuuuu.”

“Meeeeeee… what?”

The boy collapsed on his knees and sobbed. “You broke my heart!”

“I did what now?” Y/N dead-panned as the boy wailed in front of her. “Dude, get up. What the fuck?”

“Ji-eun! Why?” The boy wailed, pounding on his chest with his fist. “I-I did everything for you! I loved you so much!”

He sniffled as he took another swig of his whiskey.

“My name is Y/N—“

“What did I do wrong th-that made you replace me?” The boy slurred sadly, waving his arms. “Whe-Where did I go wrong?”

“What?” Y/N groaned, running her fingers through her hair as she crouched down and shook the boy’s shoulders. “Buddy, I’m not Ji-eun. I’m gonna go.”

As soon as she finished her words, the boy let out a loud sob and jumped on her, clutching pathetically at her torso.

“Dude, let go of me.” Y/N hissed as the boy sobbed in her chest.

“Ji-eun, please! Be with me again! I don’t care if you want me to be your second man, I’ll be okay with that.”

“That’s so pathetic—“

“Ya, Yoongi-hyung, that’s enough.” A deep voice chastised from a few feet away.

Y/N’s head shot up, her eyes landing on a tall raven-haired boy frowning a few feet away.

He was, in simple words, majestic—godly—etheral.

His eyes were the prettiest shade of dark brown she’s ever seen, black hair slightly gelled and parted in the middle—showing a little forehead, his denim jacket snug on his body.

He grinned a little as he studied the sight.

“Ah, hyung. What am I going to do with you?”

The boy, Yoongi, only sniffled as he pulled back from Y/N.

“Taehyung, Ji-eun—“

Y/N’s eyes wandered back over to Taehyung with an open mouth. So this is the teacher’s step-son Taehyung who moved here.

“That’s not Ji-eun.” Taehyung chuckled, walking over to help Yoongi up. “Now, how about we stop bothering the little lady and apologize.”

“But—“

“I’ll help you talk to Ji-eun tomorrow, Yoongi-hyung,” Taehyung shook his head, shooting Y/N a small grin as Joon-hyuk pouted. “Now, come on,”

“S-Sorry,” Yoongi hiccuped, his lower lip shaking in a sad pout.

“Uh, that’s fine,” Y/N shook her head, amused.

“Can you wait for me out here?” Taehyun asked to which Y/N only raised an eyebrow to.

“Uh, sure?”

“Thanks, I’ll be right out.”

“Sure,” Y/N shrugged. “Goodluck with Ji-eun, Yoongi.”

Yoongi burst into tears as Taehyung snorted, leading him back into the pub.

Three minutes later, he sauntered out of the building with a smile.

“I’m back,” Taehyung said. “I’ll take you home now,”

“Thanks, but no need,” Y/N shook her head. “I can do just fine on my own,”

“I don’t mind, it was the least I could do after that whole scene with Yoongi-hyung.” Taehyung smiled, waving her hand. “Lead the way.”

Y/N bit her lip as Taehyung’s smile widened.

“Come on, I insist.”

“If you’re sure.” Y/N shrugged, starting to walk as Taehyung matched her pace beside her—hands in his pockets as he hummed. “Is your friend okay?”

“Oh, drunk beyond belief but nothing new with him,” Taehyung rolled his eyes. “He gets drunk a lot—it’s sort of a natural state to him,”

“He’s alright, then?”

“Yeah, I called his brother to come take him home,” Taehyung shrugged before smiling again. “That’s nice of you, Taehyung.” Y/N mused.

At this, Taehyung raised his eyebrows.

“Your friend, Yoongi, called you Taehyung earlier,” Y/N explained before widening her eyes. “Oh, unless he got your name wrong too. In which case, I’m so s—“

“It’s fine,” He laughed, waving his hand. “No, it’s Taehyung, yeah.”

“Oh, goodie.” Y/N smiled as Taehyung tilted his head.

“What brings you here, L/N?”

It was Y/N’s turn to raise her eyebrows this time.

“Small town, news gets around.” Taehyung laughed. “You were a face I couldn’t recognize, and you did say you were Y/N earlier too.”

“Ah,” Y/N nods slowly, before stopping. “Wait—you were there? Why didn’t you come sooner?”

At this, Taehyung burst into laughter at Y/N’s wide eyes.

“It was really funny to see you struggle.”

“Nice to know you enjoy my pain,” Y/N mutters under her breath.

Taehyung smirked over at her. “Hm, yeah, I do,”

Y/N bit her lip, her mind threatening to cloud over with inappropriate images that should absolutely not pop up in a conversation with someone you just met.

Y/N cleared her throat, her cheeks brushing a furious shade of red as she looked up at the night sky.

“But—uh, listen. I don’t plan to take Yoong-hyung to Ji-eun tomorrow if he doesn’t remember so just—can you keep that part a secret?” Taehyung said, rubbing his hand behind his neck. “He’s just a real sweetheart with Ji-eun,”

“By sweetheart—“

“By sweetheart, I meant a real pain in in the ass.”

Y/N laughed loudly, making Taehyung grin.

“Yeah, if I understood correctly, I don’t think Ji-eun needs to have a chance to be forgiven,” she shrugged.

“Yeah, she screwed him up real nice.” Taehuyng snorted. “Yoongi-hyung’s all tough and edgy but when he falls in love—I don’t know. Ji-eun's really done it.”

“Hm, I hope he gets over it soon,”

“Yeah, me too.” Taehyung hummed in agreement.

Y/N smiled. Attractive, funny, and a gentleman who cares for his friends—how much more beautiful can this guy get?

Upon surveying her surroundings, Y/N cleared her throat once more.

“Well, we’re here,” Y/N said, pointing at her grandparents’ house behind her. “I should—uh,”

“Head inside,” Taehyung nodded,  waving as Y/N slowly walked up the drive-way.

Y/N took another glance at Taehyung, which only made him chuckle.

“Good night, ma’am,” he smiled, tipping an imaginary hat.

“Good night, sir,” Y/N giggled, tipping her imaginary hat back at the boy.

Taehyung laughed out loud one last time before turning around and making his way back to the direction he came from.

Y/N shut the door behind her and leaned back on it with a sigh.

Who the fuck was that boy and why was he the hottest person she’s ever met her whole entire life?

“It’s so nice that you volunteered to give us an extra set of hands at the ranch, kiddo.” Her grandfather gushed happily as he led her over to their barn. “We could really use the help,”

“Yep, real nice,” Y/N said, teeth clenched in frustration.

It was the next morning when she woke up to a new day of what her grandmother called an “honest day’s work.”

Y/N thought it was just a country saying—how wrong she was.

After breakfast, she was immediately ushered to prepare to go help at the barn because, apparently, her father said she whole-heartedly volunteered to do ranch-work.

This was something she never said she’d do.

Her grandparents, however, were ecstatic that she wanted to “immerse in the country-side”, so what choice did she have?

Her grandfather opened the doors to the barn, and she was immediately greeted with the sight of hay—so much hay—and a boy sitting next to a large table by the corner.

There, Taehyung sat with a phone in his hand.

“Taehyung is here today, he helps us from time-to-time,” Y/N’s grandfather said, leading Y/N over to the boy.

At the sound of his name, Taehyung snapped his head up and shot the two with a smile.

Taehyung looked absolutely sinful with his messy hair, high-waisted pants and brown leather belt.

His white shirt has the sleeves rolled up, perfectly showcasing the muscles in his upper arms when he raised his hand in a wave.

“Hello, grandpa,” Taehyung grinned before winking at Y/N, tipping an invisible hat in her direction just like he did the night before. “Ma’am,”

“Taehyung,” Y/N said smiling slightly.

“Our boy Tae here will be giving a bath to old Sally and Pumpkin today to prepare them for the big horse race tomorrow,” Y/N’s grandfather explained, handing the girl over to Taehyung with a pat on his back. “Now, you help him do that, maybe take the girls for a spin while you’re at it,”

At this, Y/N’s grandfather bid the two a quick farewell and left.

Y/N gulped at Taehyung’s smirk.

“So, how’s your day, Y/N?”

“Ah, pretty great so far, I guess?” Y/N smiled nervously as Taehyung raked his eyes on her from head-to-toe.

“You look beautiful today,”

“Thank you,”

“So beautiful, that it’s a shame that you have to get out of those clothes,” Taehyung quipped happily.

Y/N’s eyes widened, her mind short-circuiting as she processed his words.

“W-What?”

Taehyung let out a guffaw when he saw her wide eyes, shooting a quick wink.

“Mind out of the gutter,” He smirked, turning around to rummage around a small cabinet nearby. “Your clothes look expensive—not to mention it’s white. Don’t want to dirty that.”

Y/N glanced down at her current outfit—a white shirt she bought from Gucci and denim shorts.

He was right.

“W-Well, you’re wearing a white shirt, too!” Y/N defended weakly to white Taehyung laughed, standing up with a plaid top in his hands.

“Yeah, well, this white shirt is worth $4 for three pieces,” Taehyung joked. “I think I can afford to ruin it a little bit,”

Y/N smiled, taking the top Taehyung was offering.

“And this shirt?”

“Spare clothes I could bear to get ruined just for you,”

Somehow, the only words Y/N’s brain processed were I could ruin you.

Trying to maintain her composure, Y/N licked her chapped lips—an action noticed by Taehyung.

Taehyung’s eyes locked onto her lips, making him lick his own as well before clearing his throat.

“Well, suit up. This is going to be fun!”

Y/N grinned.

Yeah, this was going to be fun.

It was absolutely not fun.

It was one whole week of torture, for both Taehyung and Y/N.

One whole week of “you’re doing it wrong,” “stop whining it’s not hard,” “maybe if you actually listen,” and the likes and Y/N had enough.

It was one whole day of horse-riding—apparently, it was a good exercise for the horses—and Y/N was officially done with the whole country thing.

She marched into the barn and collapsed on the chair, leaning her head on the table.

Within a few seconds, a livid Taehyung marched inside the room—his pretty brown eyes wide in anger.

Y/N raised her head up and sighed in irritation. “Leave me alone, Kim,”

“No!”

“The fuck do you want?”

“You fucking screwer up, Y/N—again. For the millionth time this week.” Taehyung seethed. “The horse was going too fucking fast—I told you not to go that fast, but did you listen? No,”

Y/N clenched her teeth as Taehyung continued his rant.

“I told you to pull the rope to slow the horse down. Did you listen? No,” Taehuyng continued. “You said you put the saddle on perfectly, but you didn’t—“

“Taehyung, for the love of god—Shut the fuck up.” Y/N groaned running a hand on her face.

“Time and time again, you screw up, Y/N. What if you fell, huh? Hit your head, get a concussion? What am I supposed to tell your grandparents, huh?”

“That I fell,” Y/N hissed, glaring at Taehyung. “That fucking simple,”

“No!” Taehyung said once again, raising his hands in anger. “Are you that stupid not to follow such simple instructions—“

Y/N scoffed standing up and turning around to leave.

Immediately, Taehyung was at her heel, still continuing his rant.

“If you just did it the way that I told you to, then—“

“I’m doing my fucking best, okay?” Y/N screamed, turning to face Taehyung in anger. “You know I know nothing, I’m doing whatever the fuck I can—you can’t blame me for failing when I’m doing the best that I fucking can,”

“Yeah, that the best you can do?” Taehyung scoffed, crossing his arms. “Then you’re pure absolute shit at this—why did you even volunteer to help?”

“Because my father told me to!” Y/N argued back. “I didn’t even want to, but even then I tried all that I can to help you—“

“Well, you were absolutely no help.”

“You think I don’t know?” Y/N screeched.

“Tone it down,” Taehyung hissed. “You need to learn how to shut you’re fucking mouth,”

Y/N raised her eyebrow in disbelief in irritation.

“Oh, do I, now?” Y/N scoffed, leaning forwards with an angry glare in her eyes. “Fucking make me, country boy,”

With a scoff, Taehyung leaned down and crashed his lips on Y/N’s.

His soft lips were enough to shut her up until the next decade—only if he kept kissing her until then.

Y/N gasped, eyes wide as Taehyung harshly gripped her waist and pulled away.

“Shut you up real nice, didn’t I?”

“Fuck you,” Y/N hissed, leaning back up to reconnect their lips—hands and fingers immediately darting up to wrap around his neck and play with his hair.

Taehyung growled as he roamed her body with his hands, pushing her towards the table.

As soon as her back hit the piece of furniture, Taehyung pushed her up to sit.

He disconnected his lips with hers and immediately moved to her neck.

Y/N moaned as Taehyung quickly located her pulse point and lightly sucked.

“You’re such an asshole,” Y/N said through her moans, tilting her head to provide him more access.

“Yeah, you’re making out with this asshole,” Taehyung growled out as he returned to kissing her lips, a faint purple mark blooming on her neck.

Y/N whimpered as Taehyung’s hands reached up and grasped one of her breasts, groaning lowly as he bit her lower lip.

“Tae, please,”

“Please, what?” Taehyung muttered against her lips.

“Touch me,” Y/N moaned out.

“Fuck,” He hissed, feeling Y/N’s hands travel up his shirt.

Y/N pulled away and reached for his leather belt, slightly panting before—

“Y/N!”

Immediately, the two sprung away from each other fixing their messy hair and clothes.

As Y/N fixed her hair, the barn door open to reveal her grandmother with a smile.

“We’ll talk about this later,” Y/N muttered to Taehyung, who only smirked at the girl as he wiped the corner of his lips.

Y/N cleared her throat, slowly releasing her breath.

Kim Taehyung made her want to bite off so much more than she could chew.

“Honey, you have visitors,” Y/N’s grandmother called as she got close enough.

“I do?” Y/N raised an eyebrow.

Her eyes panned over to the entrance of the barn where a tall boy with a delicate bunny smile poked his head through.

“Hello!” Jimin cheered as he appeared behind Jungkook.

“Guys!” Y/N gasped, peeling away from Taehyung. “Jungkook!”

Taehyung blinked in confusion as Y/N darted forward and met Jungkook in a fierce embrace, being lifted up in the air and twirled as Jimin laughed behind them.

“Holy fucking shit, I missed you!” Y/N said, cradling Jungkook’s face in her hands.

“I have so much I need to tell you about,” Jungkook gossiped as Jimin reached the pair.

“So does she,” Jimin chortled.

He grabbed a few strands of Y/N’s hair and set it aside, chuckling as a dark purple bruise revealed itself on her neck.

Immediately, Y/N slapped his hands away and backed up as Jungkook chuckled lightly.

“They’re going to be staying here until the summer festa,” Her grandmother shared, making Y/N gape.

“Wow,” Y/N gasped, leaning against Jungkook who wrapped his arm around Y/N. “a whole week with me?”

“Two weeks, actually—You and me,” Jungkook giggled, squeezing Y/N at his side.

“And me, you turds.” Jimin scoffed as Jungkook slammed his palm on Jimin’s face.

“Kook, fuck off,” Jimin scoffed before pulling Y/N’s hand. “Anyway, show us around!”

“Of course—“

Taehyung let out a small cough, making Y/N snap back into reality as she turned to Taehyung.

His eyes danced between her and Jungkook, with an eyebrow raised.

“Oh, uh, in a while, Jiminie,” Y/N said as Taehyung glowered at Jungkook.

Jungkook was either impassive or downright oblivious.

Judging by how he only grinned at Y/N as he rocked back and forth on his feet.

“I have to talk to Taehyung in a quick whi—“

“Actually, I think I have something to talk about with your grandmother.” Taehyung declared, voice low and firm. “Don’t want to take you away from something important,”

“Tae—“

“Mrs. L/N, I wanted to talk to you about horse-racing,”

Y/N’s brows furrowed as Taehyung swiftly turned on his heel and marched out the back-door of the barn to the stables.

Y/N’s grandmother raised her eyebrows in confusion, facing Y/N. “Honey?”

“Touchy,” Jimin whistled as Jungkook snorted. “What was that all about?”

“Ah, that’s um,” Y/N glanced back at the back-door Taehyung exited from, almost expecting him to burst back in.

But he didn’t.

“Nothing, guys,” Y/N cleared her throat. “Just him being an asshole,”

Y/N hasn’t seen Taehyung in over a week.

Yeah, Kim Taehyung was indeed a grade-a asshole for basically sucking her face in the barn and then leaving her for dead for about a week.

Well, it’s not exactly just his fault.

But Jungkook and Jimin were here—she’s gotta spend time with her visiting friends!

Right?

Jungkook and Jimin burst through her doorway, screaming at her.

“Are you ready yet?” Jungkook screamed at her ear, tugging at her white dress.

“Jungkook, scram,” Y/N said irritably as Jimin collapsed on her bed.

“Y/N, you’re taking too long. I want to party,” Jimin whined, which Jungkook promptly followed.

“Yeah, stop trying to look pretty. You still look ugly anyways.” Jungkook commented, which earned him a slap at the back of the head from Y/N.

“What he means is the guy you made out with probably won’t be there.” Jimin shrugged, giggling as Y/N promptly turned around to shoot him a nasty glare.

“Who?” Jungkook said, oblivious doe eyes wide in surprise.

“That cute Taeyong guy from the barn when we got here,” Jimin huffed. “Remember she had a hickey?”

“Oh, yeah!” Jungkook gasped.

“It was just in the moment,” Y/N said, pursing her lips as she turned back to her vanity to apply the last few strokes of mascara. “at least for him, I think.”

“You see how he glared at me?” Jungkook snorted as he sat next to Jimin. “That’s not in the heat of the moment. He was, like, about to throw me against the wall for even hugging you,”

“That’s hot,” Jimin hummed.

Jungkook furiously turned a bright shade of red as he floundered around.

Y/N rolled her eyes.

At least her two friends were having a good… relationship, fling, whatever it was.

She picked up her lip gloss—cherry bomb.

As she applied it to her own lips, her mind wandered.

She distinctly remembers the same shade being transferred from her lips to Taehyung’s that day in the barn.

She can almost see his smirk as he wiped it away from his face.

“Y/N, are you dooooone?”

She gulped, snapping back as she slipped the gloss into her bag.

“Yeah, yeah. Come on,”

It was a big celebration at the pub.

Of course it was—it was the summer festa.

It was a big celebration all over the town.

There were food booths and picnics at every open park, rodeos and races at the open house, and a big discount on alcohol at the big party held at the pub.

There, Y/N sat by the bar with a beer in hand as Jungkook and Jimin did a surprisingly good rendition of Hannah Montana’s hoedown throwdown at the stage.

“It’d be fucking stupid to pass out on not popping, locking and polka dotting when I’m in the fucking country, Y/N,” she remembers Jimin chastising before dragging a pliant Jungkook to the stage.

Tuning out Jungkook and Jimin aggressively screaming “do the hoe-down throwdown!” through the excessively loud speakers, Y/N turned to the bar and peeked at the group beside her.

“Oh, Hobi!”

Hoseok turned around with a smile, two tequila shots in his hands.

“Y/N, didn’t know you’d be here,”

“Where else would I be?” Y/N snorted, taking the tequila shot glass Hobi offered.

“With your family, or at the rodeo?” Hobi shrugged, clinking his own shot glass with Y/N before drinking.

Y/N hissed at the alcohol’s burn as another voice sounded out.

“Someone can handle her alcohol,” Jin said teasingly, ruffling Y/N’s hair as he and Namjoon arrived.

“I did this practically everyday in the city,” Y/N huffed, batting her hands as Namjoon snorted.

“I pity your liver,” Namjoon said sympathetically.

“Where’s Chaeri?” Y/N asked to which Jin only shrugged.

“She’s at home, helping her mom cook for the big celebration. She’ll meet us here in about an hour or so,” Jin replied.

Before he could continue, a familiar voice called his name.

Jin turned around, smiling as Yoongi came into view.

“Ah, Yoongi great timing,” Jin smiled, slinging an arm around the boy.

“Stop touching me,” Yoongi whined, although he made no move to push Jin away.

“This is Y/N, our friend when we were kids,” Hobi introduced, pointing to Y/N who waved.

Immediately, Yoongi’s face burned red. “Ah, yeah. We’ve met.”

Y/N’s eyebrows raised in surprise. “Oh, you remember?”

“I’m really sorry for last week,” Yoongi apologized, shyly giving Y/N his gummy smile. “I was in a, uh, really bad place,”

“That Ji-eun girl was a bitch for doing that to you, by the way,” Y/N snorted. “Did you talk to her the next morning?”

“Ah, no. I figured she didn’t deserve a chance to explain,” Yoongi shrugged as Namjoon gaped.

“What exactly happened?”

“Ah, he was, uh—pretty drunk,”

“An understatement. I sobbed on her and thought she was Ji-eun,” Yoongi winced, making the rest of their company laugh. “If it wasn’t for Taehyung, I probably would have sobbed on her all night.”

At the mention of the forbidden name, Y/N tensed.

Immediately, a feeling of sadness and longing passed through her—one whole week without something she got so used to.

“Oh, yeah, which reminds me,” Hobi piped up. “I would’ve thought you’d be with Taehyung now. You guys have been working together for the past weeks right?”

Yoongi nodded along, hands grabbing at the beer bottles appearing at the bar behind Y/N.

“He only ever talked about you, actually.” Jin snorted. “It got pretty annoying,”

Jungkook and Jimin suddenly appeared, presenting Y/N with a topic change.

She cleared her throat and smiled, gesturing at the two.

“These are my friends from the city, by the way. Jungkook and Jimin, these are Jin, Hobi, Yoongi and Namjoon.”

After a brief introduction, the group immediately dabbled into different topics before settling on the festa itself.

“So, what other things happens during the summer festa aside from parties where everyone gets wasted?” Jimin asked, supporting on a red-faced Jungkook who was coerced by Jin to take three consecutive shots.

“Well,” Hobi trailed off, trying to recall the events.

“There’s a horse racing track in two hours, Yoongi’s going to join,” Namjoon recalled.

“Oh, you’ve been drinking, though?” Jungkook slurred, pointing at Yoongi.

“Will you be okay?”

Yoongi only snorted, waving nonchalantly.

“That means he’ll be okay.” Jin translated, to which Yoongi replied with a two thumbs-ups.

“Oh, and bull-riding on old Hellraiser happening in like 30-minutes at the rodeo house.” Hobi supplied, turning to Y/N. “Did you wish Tae a good luck today?”

Y/N tilted her head, mind practically floating at the mention of talking to Taehyung again.

“Ah, I haven’t exactly had the time to talk to him recently,” Y/N shook her head.

“Well, you should,” Yoongi snorted, taking another swig from the bottle in his hands. “He’ll need all the luck he can get.”

“Why?”

Namjoon, Jin, Hobi and Yoongi exchanged confused looks before Hobi furrowed his eyebrows at Y/N.

“You don’t know?”

“Don’t know what?”

“Hellraiser is the bull. It’s an annual festa thing for men brave enough to try riding her,” Namjoon said.

“Then it’s probably fun,” Jimin supplied to which Jin shook his head.

“Not really. Hellraiser is named that because she’s too tough to ride. She’s sent a lot of riders to  the hospital, that bull,” Yoongi shook his head.

“The longest anyone ever rode her was…” Hobi trailed off, looking at Namjoon.

“3.8 seconds.” Namjoon supplied. “That was Mr. Han—three years ago. He was sent to the hospital, he couldn’t move until about six weeks in. Took a week knocked out and multiple critical injuries—it was painful to watch,”

“Scary,” Jungkook commented.

Y/N shushed the tipsy boy before furrowing her eyebrows, heart racing a mile a minute.

“So, Hellraiser is a murder bull in-the-making,” Y/N said. “What’s that got to do with Taehyung?”

Everyone was silent before Yoongi raised his hand.

“No, yeah, I’ll tell her.” Yoongi shook his head, muttering about ‘cowards.’ “Taehyung’s having a go at Hellraiser in about thirty minutes.”

At this, Y/N froze.

This bull—Hellraiser—sent a grown-ass man to the hospital in a one-week coma and multiple critical injuries that took five more weeks for him to be able to move again.

This bull was going to hold Taehyung’s fate in half an hour.

She wasn’t exactly sure if she was ready to see Taehyung in the hospital. She can’t.

They said they we going to talk about what happened at the barn. She had to ask him why he didn’t even talk to her this week or why he left her that day, or—

“Y/N,” Hobi sighed.

Y/N flinched in her chair, gulping as she turned to Hobi who sighed as he held her shoulders.

“I can see you’re nervous about this. Go to him before he goes on,” Hobi reassured.

“I have to go,” Y/N agreed with a nod, her eyes quickly sweeping over her peers.

She shot out of her seat, barely registering Jungkook and Jimin bid swift farewells to their table-mates before following her trail.

She didn’t care—her gaze was directly set on one location and one location only: The Rodeo House.

Suddenly, the subtle red poster on the doors with the big black bull and the words “Hellraiser” on the front wasn’t so subtle anymore.

Y/N burst through the doors in anger, taking a sharp corner into the door labelled Challenger’s Lounge.

The inside was wide.

All around her were white walls, buffet tables, large televisions showing the arena outside and people wandering about as they waiting for their own respective challenges with their friends and family.

But none of this mattered to Y/N—No.

All she could see was the tall raven-haired male all decked out in denim by the television, crossing his arms and tapping his foot as he looked up at the live broadcast from outside.

This was a sight she could remember perfectly—it was what he wore when she first met him outside the pub.

Exactly in the same position.

She noticed his unruly hair that normally would’ve inserted some pretty sinful thoughts in her brain, and how we bit his lips and nipped at his nails in nervousness—a habit he usually did when Y/N went too fast while horse-riding, or how he raised his eyebrow slightly at every interesting thing he could see in the television.

Normally, Y/N would stop and Kim Taehyung in all his glory and she almost did—but her anger won in the end.

“Kim Taehyung!”

The said boy flinched, turning around with his mouth wide-open in surprise as he saw her.

Y/N looked so out of place around the plaids, leather and denim people sported all around her—she was decked in a flowy white dress and her hair was pinned back.

She looked so innocent, so delicate and gentle, but the anger in her face told Taehyung otherwise.

“What the actual fuck?”

“What?” Taehyung asked, ignoring the curious gazes casted on them

He grew even more confused as the girl marched towards her.

“A murderous bull? You’re going to ride a murderous bull?” Y/N seethed. “Are you out of your fucking mind?”

“Technically, Hellraiser hasn’t murdered anyone yet,” Taehyung supplied. “Just critically injured. You know, maiming.”

“Is that supposed to be better?” Y/N hissed.

Taehyung shrugged, crossing his arms with a frown.

“Well, no, but I gotta.” Taehyung supplied.

“Why?”

“I just gotta,” Taehyung said, crossing his arms again. “If I could actually get to ride that bull for more than 3.8 seconds, It’d be really big for me,”

“How—“ Y/N started, but shook her head in exasperation. “You know what?”

“What?”

“If you do this, I’ll never speak to you again,” Y/N said, her voice firm. “Taehyung, please. Don’t get on that bull.”

Taehyung uncroseed his arms, his eyes turning soft.

“Y/N—“ He gently whispered, reaching out to her.

His eyes flitted over to the door as it opened once more to reveal Jungkook.

“Oh, Y/N! I finally found you,” Jungkook said, walking forward. “Been looking all over for you. Jimin, she’s here!”

Taehyung’s gaze immediately hardened, confusing Y/N.

He cleared his throat before stuffing his hands inside his pockets.

He turned and trailed his gaze back to the televisions, his voice low as he spoke.

“I’ve lived 24 years without you, I think I’ll be fine.”

Hurt danced in Y/N’s eyes as she slowly backed away.

“I’ll never speak to you again,” she nodded solemnly.

Taehyung could only look at her as she took Jungkook and Jimin with her and walked out of the lounge.

“Taehyung, it’s time,”

He had more things to worry about.

It was a few hours later when Y/N sat alone on a log in front of a campfire.

Jimin and Jungkook were long gone, talking about the time and how it’s late.

But she didn’t want to go home—not yet.

So here she was, a few feet from her barn alone and staring at a campfire without her friends.

A few footsteps told her there was someone coming.

She couldn’t really find it in her to care.

The figure took a seat beside her and cleared his throat.

“Hey,”

It was Taehyung.

Silly, denim-wearing, tall as fuck, messy-haired Kim Taehyung.

“I, uh, stayed on the bull for 5 seconds,” Taehyung shared, biting his lip as he also stared into the fire. “I fell, but nothing bad happened. A little sore,”

Y/N only hummed, still gazing into the hot flame.

After a few minutes of silence, Taehyung huffed and stood up.

“Alright, what’s going on?”

“I don’t know,” Y/N replied blankly, her eyes still trained on the fire.

-“I don’t understand,” Taehyung angrily said, his eyes glaring onto Y/N from his position. “Why are you ignoring me?”

Y/N only stayed silent.

“Why didn’t you want me to ride that bull?”

Y/N clenched her teeth, her eyes firm on its spot as she gazed at the burning fire.

“Why—“

“Because I like you!” Y/N exploded, her eyes wide in anger as she turned to Taehyung. “Because I don’t want to see you get hurt,”

“Why?”

“Should there be any reason why?” Y/N replied as Taehyung gaped at her, silent in her spot.

Y/N squirmed in her chair, sighing in exasperation as she shook her head.

“Let’s just watch this fire.”

There was a few minutes of silence between the two.

Taehyung turned his head to look at Y/N, who looked back at him. “Stop,”

He sighed and gazed back at the fire, slowly turning his head to stare back at her.

“I said stop.” Y/N hissed. “Just stop, I want you to stop,”

Taehyung sighed angrily and stomped off, leaving Y/N in her lonesome.

It was expected. She expected that.

She wanted to sit there and think, but she never got the chance to.

Just as quick as he left, Taehyung marched back to the campfire—his sleeves rolled up and arms bulging in strain as he carried two buckets full of water in his arms.

Y/N turned to him, her eyes wide in alarm as he approached.

“Taehyung, what are you—“

Not replying, Taehyung stopped next to her and dumped both buckets of water on the campfire.

Y/N could only look at him in shock as he panted in frustration, turning back at the girl.

“Will you talk to me now?”

“What the fuck do you want from me, Taehyung?” Y/N screeched, slamming a hand on his chest.

“I want you to talk to me.”

“You want me to talk to you? Fine. Let’s talk.” Y/N hissed, slamming a hand once more on his chest. “Why did you leave me that day, huh? Why did you leave me for a fucking week blank?”

“You tell me,” Taehyung glared back at Y/N, who only smiled angrily.

“No, I’m asking the questions. You wanted to talk—now, give me an answer.” Y/N sighed, sitting back on the log. “You’re a good guy, Tae. I believe you’re a good guy. I believe you won’t just turn back and leave me for dead,”

“Why?”

“Because if you weren’t you wouldn’t be here trying to ask me to talk to you.”

Taehyung sighed, sitting down next to her.

Silently, Y/N shook her head. “I like you. You’re a good guy, you’re a good friend.”

Just when it was all good, it spiraled back into a huge ball of disaster.

“Just a friend?” Taehyung scoffed. “Right. I should have known.”

He stood up with angrily, muttering the same sentence all over again. “I should have known,”

“See, this is what’s wrong with you!” Y/N angrily said, standing back up as she screamed at Taehyung’s back. “You’re making me so confused! Just a friend—this is bullshit.”

“You’re the one who said it,” Taehyung argued, but his words fell on deaf ears.

“Why did you kiss me that day, huh? What, you just wanted a good fuck that day? Were you angry you never got to do it, huh?” Y/N hissed.

Taehung raised his eyebrows, scoffing in disbelief.

“You’re one to talk. Who’s been dangling her city friend all around the fucking town, huh?” Taehyung replied.

“Dangling?” Y/N angrily laughed. “You’re the one who hasn’t talked to me in a week, you fucking asshole. You don’t get the right to talk about my friend like that.”

“Wow, you’re really up his ass, huh.” Taehyung shook his head. “Is his dick really that good, huh?”

At this, Y/N stopped.

His what now?

Taehyung might have been clever and charming—but his ass was definitely oblivious.

If he just thought for a second, he’d realize that Jungkook was as straight as a bendy straw.

Still, she couldn’t stop the word that spilled out her mouth.

“Fuck yeah. Fucking Jungkook is so fucking good, I couldn’t fucking walk for a week straight,” Y/N hissed, enjoying the way Taehyung’s expression progressively got angrier and angrier. “Fucking him would probably be a million fucking times better than your sorry ass.”

“Yeah?” Taehyung angrily growled.

“Yeah,” Y/N replied.

“We’ll see about that,” Taehyung gruffed, stepping forward and crashing his lips on hers.

Y/N’s response was immediate.

Her lips meshed with his so perfectly as she melted against his body, her arms wrapped around his neck.

Taehyung pressed closer deepening the kiss before Y/N pulled away.

“You know what? Fuck you, Taehyung,” She hissed before falling down on her knees.

“Oh, I will,” Taehyung smirked as watched Y/N reach for his leather belt.

As the girl cussed at him, she pulled the belt away and agressively pulled his pants down.

He was well-endowed. He wasn’t too thick, just the right size for Y/N’s hand, but he was long.

He wasn’t hard yet, but he was getting there.

Y/N almost hesitated and wondered if he would fit in her mouth as she placed a tentative lick on the tip.

Taehyung drew in a breath, his hands reaching to tangle in her hair.

Fuck it, Y/N thought before enclosing the tip with her mouth and sucking.

“Just like a fucking lollipop,” Taehyung guided as Y/N made her way down on him.

He was too long. What she couldn’t reach, she used her mouth.

“Fuck,” Taehyung hissed, groaning as he threw his head back.

Y/N pulled away and licked the underside of his shaft, sighing as she regained her breath.

Taehyung shuddered as Y/N’s thumb brushed over his bulbous head.

“You’re so fucking big,” Y/N moaned as she pumped him.

Taehyung could only look down at her with a smirk.

“Bigger than Jungkook?” Taehyung asked with a smirk making the girl roll her eyes.

Trying not to feed into his ego, Y/N descended back on him—going as deep as she can go.

Her hand reached up to fondle his balls, grunting in effort as she shifted back and forth on him.

“Fuck, you’re so fucking good at this,” Taehung groaned, his hands tightening in her hair.

He gave tiny thrusts that only increased his pleasure ten-fold.

“Feels so fucking good,” Taehyung hissed out, throwing his head back. “I can’t wait to feel you, shit. I’m going to fuck you so hard,”

Taehyung could swear, as he looked back down to the girl on her knees with him in her mouth, that this was probably the most beautiful sight he’d ever see.

Y/N whined in her spot, feeling her panties grow damp at Taehyung’s words.

She reached down and lightly rubbed at her crotch—aiming for a small sense of relief.

“Holy shit,” Taehyung hissed, looking down and catching Y/N palming herself.

Y/N moaned lightly, and Taehyung can feel it as Y/N shoved him deeper down her throat.

“Fuck, Fuck, Fuck!” Taehyung groaned out. “I’m almost there, I’m cumming.”

At his words, Y/N swallowed around his dick.

This was his last straw. Taehyung threw his head back as he released his load on her.

Y/N opened her mouth, letting him fill her mouth with his essence.

When Taehyung climbed down from his high, he looked down to see Y/N pull herself away from him and swallowing.

Somehow, this got him going more than the actual blowjob.

“Taehyung,” Y/N started, staring up at him from her position.

She was a mess—his mess, he thought.

She was still on her knees, her hand still holding him as she looked up at him with the biggest puppy eyes. Her lip gloss smudged around her mouth and her hair was totally mussed around.

“Taehyung,” she repeated. “I-I need you.”

His eyes shifted towards her family’s barn a few feet away, smirking.

Seems like he’ll get to fuck her there after all.

The moment they entered the barn, Taehyung shoved Y/N against the closed door and immediately went for her neck.

Y/N could only groan loudly as his hand shot up to fondle her breasts over her dress.

“Taehyung,” Y/N groaned, making Taehyung close his eyes with a groan.

Right there and then, he could die happily hearing her gentle voice say his name in the dirtiest manner.

Taehyung pulled away after he satisfied himself with a couple marks on her neck, moving to nip at her jaw and place another rough kiss on her lips.

“All mine, all mine,”

Y/N only whimpered, her head hitting the wooden door as she tilted it back.

Taehyung’s fingers made quick work of the zipper behind her dress, harshly pulling it off of her and somewhere on the barn.

As soon as Y/N heard the soft thud of her dress, she straightened her head up and furrowed her eyebrows.

“Tae, that’s Gucci—“

“Shut the fuck up,” Taehyung growled, pulling down the cups of her bra and attaching his lips onto her right nipple.

“Oh my god,” Y/N can only moan, closing her eyes as she heaved.

With a nibble, Taehyung pulled away. “All of this is fucking mine, make sure your city friends know that.”

“They will, they do,” Y/N breathed out in a whine as Taehyung returned to fondling and sucking on her breasts.

Y/N gasped as she felt him hard on her again, hips pressing roughly on hers.

“Take it off,” Y/N breathed, her hands underneath his denim jacket and tugging on his white shirt.

Taehyung made quick movements.

He barely registered his jacket and his shirt hitting the ground behind him as he felt Y/N’s hand fondle him.

“Y/N,” he breathed out, making the girl whine.

“Tae, please,”

Taehyung hissed, dragging her body away from the floor and harshly bending her over the fence of an empty stable.

His hand landed a sharp smack on her ass, making her grip the metal railings she leaned on.

“Taehyung, please,” Y/N whined, her head lolling forward.

“You’re so wet,” Taehyung said, rubbing his finger over the damp patch on her panties. “Who did this?”

“You did,”

“I didn’t hear it,” Taehyung quipped, landing another harsh smack on her ass. “Who did?”

“You did,” Y/N moaned louder, whining as Taehyung delivered another sharp smack. “You did, you did,”

Satisfied, Taehyung smirked and gripped her thin panties—ripping the delicate lace apart.

Y/N was so lost in a haze of lust that she didn’t even notice.

After a brief moment of anticipation, Taehyung placed his thumb of her hooded clit.

He took pleasure in the way Y/N inhaled a sharp breath, lowering her head down and releasing a high-pitched whine.

He played with her, rubbing her clit at a torturously slow pace and fingers itching closer to her slit but never dipping in.

“Taehyung, touch me please,” Y/N whimpered.

“What do you want?” Taehyung asked, eyes light with mischief.

“Stick your fingers in me,” Y/N whined.

“Whatever you want, princess,”

With two fingers, Taehyung eased his fingers inside her warmth.

He didn’t start slow, no. He set a fast, rhythmic pace that had Y/N quaking.

He let his thumb continue its assault on her clit, his other hand securely gripping her waist.

Y/N shuddered on her spot, eyes closed as she thrusted her hips on his hands.

At that moment, he could swear that she looked like a goddess.

As Y/N clenched on him, he abruptly pulled away.

Y/N let out a high-pitched whine turning her head to see a smirking Taehyung.

“What the fuck?”

“I said I was going to fuck you real good, Y/N,” Taehyung said, turning her around. “I intend to stick to it.”

Y/N shuddered once more, readjusting her grip on the fence as Taehyung massaged her waist.

“I’d love to taste you, but next time,” Taehyung sighed, positioning himself in her entrance before stopping. “I, uh, just realized I don’t have a condom,”

“Taehyung, I’m on the pill,”

“Good,” Taehyung sighed in relief. “I don’t think I can wait any longer,”

Before Y/N could let out a retort, Taehyung thrusted in.

Y/N released out a loud moan, her head falling down limply as Taehyung thrusted in and out on a rough pace.

“Holy shit, you feel so amazing,” Taehyung muttered as he smoothed his hands on her back. “You feel so perfect,”

“Tae, Tae,” Y/N only whimpered as Taehyung thrusted harder.

Y/n’s body shook everytime their hips met, her moans getting louder and louder.

“Scream for me,” Taehyung huffed, “Let everyone know who’s making you feel this good,”

“Tae, please, harder!” Y/N almost cried.

Y/N whimpered, her hands reaching back to lay on Taehyung. “Please, please. I’m gonna cum.”

At her words, Taehyung slipped out of her and picked her up.

“Taehyung, wha—“

He set her down on her back, gazing at her as she lied on the table.

“Tae?”

He pulled her closer, prying her legs open as he hissed.

“You’re so fucking hot,” He muttered before plunging back in on a different angle.

Y/N could almost scream, throwing her head back in pleasure.

Taehyung’s tanned skin was covered in sweat by this point as he grunted and panted with every thrust.

The barn was filled with nothing but moans groans, and the sound of their hips slapping against each other at every single thrust.

After one particularly hard thrust, Taehyung fixed his grip on Y/N’s leg—hitting a particularly deep angle.

His hand reached down to press over Y/N’s lower stomach, smirking as a bulge appeared at every thrust.

Y/N whined, a whole new plethora of pleasure clouding her brain.

“I-I’’m—“

“Are you going to cum?” Taehyung asked mischievously as he thrusted harder and faster.

“Yes, yes. God, yes.”

“Hold it,”

Taehyung groaned in effort, each rough thrust losing rhythm.

“Please, please, please,” Y/N whimpered, her hand reaching down to grasp over Taehyung’s please.

“With me,” Taehyung said through gritted teeth. “Now,”

As soon as she felt Taehyung explode inside of her, Y/N allowed herself to indulge in pure euphoria—his name falling off of her lips in a loud prayer-like chant.

All she could see was white. All she could feel was his shallow thrusts inside of her as he filled her up.

Taehyung kept thrusting as both of them, letting out silent moans and groans as he rode down their highs.

Y/N breathed out, completely spent as she climbed down from her orgasm, turning slightly to Taehyung with a smile.

“Hi,” she muttered, to which the boy only replied with a grin.

“Hi,” Taehyung replied, still hovering above her and tucked a lock of hair beneath her ear.

He leaned his forehead on hers as she giggled, raking a hand through his hair.

“What… exactly is this, Taehyung?” Y/N asked.

Taehyung hummed.

“Is this just for like one night? A spur of the moment thing or—“

Taehyung smiled.

“If it isn’t obvious yet, I really like you too,” Taehyung said. “Fuck you were so cute that day, when I saw you when Yoongi was crying on you,”

Y/N chuckled as Taehyung laid his head on her chest. “And those weeks at the barn, I was really nervous to spend so much time with you,”

“Is that why you were so mean to me?”

“Aren’t city boys mean to the girls they like?” Taehyung asked, hands roaming her sides in a loving caress. “I thought I was too late because of Jungkook,”

“You-You do know Jungkook doesn’t like me, right?” Y/N giggled as Taehyung buried his head in her neck again, laying little nibbles here and there. “He likes Jimin,”

Taehyung froze and raised his head.

“Wait, what?”

Y/N laughed at his stupefied gaze, throwing her head back in amusement.

“But… all those things you said about fucking him was—“

“Not true,” Y/N shook her head. “He’s gay, Taehyung. He’s always liked Jimin. I think Jimin likes him, too.”

Taehyung frowned, his hands caressing Y/N’s waist.

“So, you don’t like him?”

“Of course, not. Not like that,” Y/N shook her head, reaching up and laughing. “The way you got so riled up when I told you I fucked him, though. You were so—“

Taehyung leaned forward, crashing his lips on hers once more.

Y/N inhaled sharply, her hand climbing up to lightly rake on his back as she arched hers.

She could feel him harden against her hips once more.

“You need to learn how to shut your fucking mouth, baby.” Taehung mumbled lowly against her lips.

Y/N smirked, tilted her head as she felt Taehyung adjust himself to her entrance once more.

“Make me, country boy,”

[subtlereferencetomyinterests]

Black Cloth and Star Systems- Fusion AU

Ao3,   MasterPost,  More of This AU

Legally speaking this is the second installment in my fusion au, and u should definitely read the first one!! but it is not necessary to understand this one.

Relationships: Romantic Analogical, (briefly) mentioned romantic Royality

Warnings: Tooth-rotting fluff, minor insecurity (it is Logan after all), one (1) kiss, excessive cuddling, Virgil and the Logan/Virgil fusion both have monster-like traits (big teef, pointy ears, nocturnal eyes, etc.), the fusion is also agender because I said so, and seriously lots of flowery descriptions cuz I was really having a good time with this one. Oh, and lack of sleep/unhealthy sleep schedules, brief mention of paranoia (very very minor), and I think I accidentally implied that Virgil has ADHD but that’s par for the course. 

Word Count: 3,797

Logan stared at the ceiling of his room, tired eyes tracing over the patterns etched into it. They were irregular, scrawls and lines that bumped up from the plaster and stretched on and on. If he squinted, they could almost look like maps- charting and directing the reader across a very foreign land, and in addition the reader might not be good with following maps, which would explain why this one seemed so vague. Or maybe it wasn’t showing a place at all. Nowhere real, at the very least. 

Oh, what the fuck was he talking about. The ceiling was a goddamn ceiling, and Logan was exhausted.

Sleeping would be the ideal solution, and it was something he definitely wasn’t opposed to, but by this point it was borderline impossible. Logan could shut his eyes, but he knew all he’d see would be that blinding flash of pink light. He could try and try to relax beneath his blanket, but still he would see double-set of eyes, swirling between emerald green and cinnamon brown, set behind big cutesy-framed glasses. He’d picture those two pairs of arms, that staggering display of height, and the body that was decorated with gold and crimson and sky-blue. 

What he was seeing was beyond understanding, and it was all that he could think about. His friends had fused. Patton and Roman, out of pretty much nowhere, had become one being right before everyone’s eyes. One burly, talkative, and endlessly fascinating being.

Like any person who persistently sought knowledge, Logan had taken to investigating the new creature at once. He’d had questions, burning questions, but Patron- as he’d named himself- had requested some alone time in his new form. It was a perfectly reasonable ask, so Logan resolved to postpone his interviewing until Patron was ready. But then, just as he was looking forward to finding out more about him that next morning, he was back to being two sides. Two sickeningly sweet sides who were way too caught up in their new relationship to answer any of Logan’s questions copacetically (All their answers had been full of purple prose, talking about how fusing was just the most amazing thing, and providing no real insight into it at all). 

Logan, presented with bizarre occurrences and offered no explanation, was understandably restless, abuzz with curiosity, and frustrated. And, if he was being honest, he was interested in the topic beyond what could be considered objective study, as well.

Very interested, in fact. He found himself wondering that… perhaps… Was he also capable of fusion?

Yes, the best way to learn about it would be to experience first-hand, so that would solve that problem. But that was hardly Logan’s entire reason for wanting to try it; Patton had soundly reported that forming Patron helped his and Roman’s communication by miles. Specifically vis a vis their more affectionate emotions, which really ended up being the thesis of the whole ordeal. It was, fundamentally, a very affectionate thing. 

Logan sat up abruptly, shooting a glare at his door from across the room. This was getting ridiculous; it would be a horrible idea to try something as significant as fusing with so little information on it. Just because it seemed self-explanatory didn’t mean that it was, and the results could be unstable and catastrophic!

But. 

But it wouldn’t be. There was the side he knew- the side he trusted- well enough to believe that it wouldn’t really go so awry.

Logan was making excuses.

What was there to be explained verbally that wouldn’t be much easier to just experience? Patron had proved two things: 1, fusing could happen, and 2, fusing could un-happen without issue. Any of the specifics would be figured out best by firsthand experience, that was pretty evident.

So Logan was making a few excuses, and maybe he was a bit scared about the whole thing, but so what? It was a moot point anyway, because Virgil would never want to participate in it, anyway. The idea of fusion would only upset the anxious side, maybe send him spiraling, and that was the last thing Logan wanted. 

With a groan, Logan flopped back down onto his bed, resuming his studious observation of the popcorn-patterned ceiling.

… 

Yeah, it wasn’t working.

Logan dragged himself up yet again, flinging the covers off of his legs harshly. He sat, immobile, glaring down just past the foot of his bed for an uncertain amount of time. He then heaved a very over dramatic sigh, kicked his legs over the side of his mattress, and stood. He set his feet down as though the carpet had personally wronged him, trodding across the room and throwing his door open with the same temperament. 

 The hallway was pitch dark, but Logan barely noticed it. He made his way down the stairs, the map of the Mindpalace splaying out in his head and directing him as well as light would. As soon as he hit the bottom of the stairs, his (moody) stomping ceased, for the time being. He tipped his head to one side, confused, as he listened out. 

There was a perfect silence.

An abrupt perfect silence. The very specific type of quiet that was too clearly manufactured. Such a- a tense hush could only be brought about by someone deliberately holding their breath. 

Logan shuffled his feet, peering into the blackness. Something shifted over by the couch, and the gleam of two reflectively-paneled eyes made themselves apparent. Logan yelped in fright, stumbling over his legs and bumping his back into the wall. 

There was a thump from across the room, a curse of ‘oh, shit’, and another shimmer from those eyes, animalistic and narrow. 

“Logan?” A gravelly voice asked, “Is that you?”

Logan blinked, staring at the dark silhouette that had come to stand before him. Animalistic, perhaps, but very very tall, and very very person-shaped. 

“Virgil?”

A lamp clicked on, washing the room in low and orange light, revealing that the creature was indeed Virgil. He looked considerably more human, now that he could be seen past his imposing outline- and he also looked more tired. 

Somehow, despite all of the other oddities in their situation, Logan found himself preoccupied by the smallest detail.

“Your eyes, Dear,” he drew forward for a closer look,  “How haven’t I noticed? They’re reflective!”

Virgil shrugged impassively, leaning down to let Logan hold his head and examine the unusual feature. 

“You can’t really tell unless it’s very dark out, or if you know what you’re looking for. I guess it just never came up.”

“But you can see in the dark, then?” Logan asked, perfectly aware that he sounded more than a little awed. Virgil just snorted, looking endeared. 

“Yup,” he popped the ‘p’, “Is it that big of a surprise?”

Logan turned the question over in his mind, but after a moment he shook his head, no. Virgil already had a multitude of unique attributes- his fangs, his claws, and a few more distinct things that only appeared when he got particularly stressed. (All of the sides had traits like those, actually. Of them, Logan was certainly the most average- the only discrepancy had to be his slightly exaggerated proportions, and even that couldn’t compare to some of the others’.)

Virgil hummed vacantly, shifting his weight a few times over. He kneaded his shoulder, glancing down at Logan with sudden interest. 

“So, what’s up with you? It’s like, three in the morning.” 

Logan stiffened, but tried to disguise the worry. 

“I could ask you the same question,” he deflected, ineffectively. Virgil only smirked in response. 

“I mean, I guess you could: paranoia, pent up energy, general inability to focus- you know, the stuff that keeps me up every night. You, though,” Virgil hovered over him, making him tilt his head back to keep eye-contact with their height difference. Logan felt his face flush, though it was only partially due to embarrassment. “You don’t stay up late, L, like ever.”

“I’ve just been thinking a lot,” he once more evaded. 

“You’re always thinking,” Virgil responded with a laugh, but he stood up straighter and gave Logan his space. Logan glanced up, confused, only to get a shrug by way of reply. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, babe. I’m not gonna, like, interrogate you. I just… wanna make sure you’re okay, is all.”

“Oh,” he smiled, “Yes, I am. Thank you.”

Virgil gestured to the couch, returning the smile.

“Wanna stay up with me? Might help you get your mind off whatever it’s on.”

Logan relaxed at that, nodding a bit sleepily as he followed his partner to the sofa. 

Virgil’s arm was twined around Logan’s waist, holding him into the taller trait’s side as they sat comfortably on the couch. In the near pitch dark, Virgil’s laptop was propped up against the coffee table, the screen lit up by slightly unnerving YouTube animations. 

Truth be told, though, Logan had paid attention to exactly none of them. He had a few reasons for this: one, he was very sleepy. Two, Virgil was warm- much warmer than himself, as Logan had always had strangely cold skin, and the heat was calming. And three, he was still caught up in his own thoughts, albeit less frantic and frightened versions of them by this point.

He knew that Virgil could easily sense his anxiety, but still, Anxiety did not pry. Add that to the many-paged list of reasons why Logan appreciated him as much as he did. 

Appreciate him he did, yes, and he also- he trusted him. Completely. To such a degree that, in the serene partial-silence between the couple, Logan found himself wondering what would happen if he just… told Virgil? If he explained what was on his mind, would it really upset him as much as he feared? The idea of fusing, well, just talking about it couldn’t be too much of a disaster. They were too strong, too stable for that.

“Virge?” Logan didn’t turn to look at him as he spoke. The name was really just a murmur on his lips, uttered noncommittally and with the hope that it might just go unheard.

With a soft click, the video paused, and Virgil shifted. 

“Yeah?”

Oh. He was really doing this.

“Could I ask you about something?” Logan would’ve left it at that, but feeling Virgil tense up beside him, he hurried to elaborate: “It’s nothing bad, my love, I just- it’s what’s been worrying me, this evening.”

“Uh- ask away, I guess..”

Logan took a deep breath, feeling his heart rate increase concerningly. He was thankful for the lack of light in the room; if the embarrassed heat spreading across his face was any indication, he likely looked just as nervous as he felt.

He exhaled, trying to focus on Virgil’s arm around him instead of the worries. Everything would be alright.

“You remember when Patton and Roman fused, I trust?”

There was an almost subtle intake of breath from Virgil. 

“Yeah, I wasn’t about to forget something like that, L.”

“Right, of course,” Logan found Virgil’s hand and wound their fingers together, fiddling with them. “I just wanted to know your thoughts on the situation.”

There was a beat.

“Um. I’m just relieved that they could get back to normal, I guess. I was sorta worried they’d get stuck- which doesn’t make a lot of sense in hindsight, but with how clingy they both are, I mean…” 

Logan hummed, encouraging him to go on, despite the intelligent side’s swiftly fading hope.

“But, like, now that I know they’re okay, I guess it’s not really any of my business?” Hesitation laced Virgil’s voice, as though he wasn’t sure what he was meant to say. “Other than that, though, I just think it’s kind of weird. Like, the whole idea of it. Fusion.”

“‘Weird’ in a negative sense?”

“I don’t know, man,” Virgil huffed, “I mean, I’m not a big fan of cartoons but- it’s weird like it’s interesting, weird like I wanna know more. If that makes any sense.”

Oh. That was promising.

“It does make sense,” Logan whispered, desperately emphatic. The glow of Virgil’s eyes turned to him, wide enough that they looked like little full moons.

“Did you-” he stopped short. Inhaled sharply. Then asked it all in a rush: “Are you asking because you wanted to try it? With me?”

Logan stayed silent, gripping too-tight to his boyfriend’s hand. He sounded… surprised? But maybe not upset? 

Oh, who was he kidding, he’d never been able to read tones, really, and it was too dark to try and figure out Virgil’s body language. He’d just have to go blind on this one.

“Yes,” Logan blurted, immediately holding his breath for a response.

Virgil was as stiff as a board. His hand was frozen in place, his gaze boring into Logan. 

“Are you sure?” 

His tone was soft, sweet, and so so careful. Logic blinked. He wasn’t sure what he’d expected from Virgil, but he knew that it wasn’t something so… gentle.

“I- maybe? It’s not necessary, if you don’t think you’d be comfortable with-”

“That’s not what I was asking,” Virgil interjected, “I wanna know if you’re sure that you want this, not how you think I feel.”

Logan mumbled an apology, feeling oddly chastised. He collected his thoughts and tried again.

“Yes, I’m sure. I- I trust you, Virgil.”

Virgil relaxed considerably, his head dropping to rest in Logan’s hair. 

“Okay. Good.”

And with that, he went quiet again. The show was not unpaused, though. Logan wondered if he was meant to say something, and if so he wondered what it was. But in the end he couldn’t make any sound at all.

Virgil’s hand slipped out of his, instead moving to the back of his neck. Logan instinctively leaned forward with its direction, letting himself be held close. In turn, he wrapped his arms around Virgil’s waist, turning sideways into him. He was close enough now to hear the beat of the anxious side’s heart, which was always rather quicker than anyone else's. This time, though, it was like a hummingbird’s, hammering loud and excited.

Logan tilted his head (as much as he could) in confusion. Had the conversation somehow affected Virgil more than it first seemed? Was something about the situation that spiked his anxiety? But that didn’t add up, either, because his breathing was completely even, and he wouldn’t let anyone be this close to him if he really was panicking.

Before Logan could ask what- if anything- was wrong, Virgil nestled his face in his hair, holding him impossibly tighter. And at that point, they were pressed flush together head-to-toe. And that was what made it click. 

Oh, they were doing this now. This- this was Virgil’s way of attempting- 

Logan hooked his ankle around Virgil’s, clumsily attempting to reciprocate the- erm, the Thing That They Were Trying. Heat rose in his cheeks at even the thought of it. 

What was he supposed to do? Was there some way to activate it? Was it enough to simply touch, or was movement required to fuse? What if they couldn’t get it to work at all? That would make plenty of sense, Logan was logic and what was the possibility that he’d follow the same rules as, say, Roman-

“Hey.”

Logan glanced up, his neck straining at the angle. Virgil was gazing down at him, pupils expanded with fondness, his fingers easing through the hairs at the back of Logan’s neck.

“Calm down, okay?” 

Logan might have commented on the irony of that, but Virgil was leaning forward and pressing their lips together oh-so gently, and all his thoughts flew out of the proverbial window as he kissed back. 

It was soft, light, maybe a little clumsy. The touch was barely-there, really, just ghosting. And then it wasn’t there, at all. The feeling faded, as did so many others, but neither of them were moving apart- or at least, they didn’t think that they were. If anything, they seemed to be getting closer, and closer, but-

Closer to what, exactly?

They opened their eyes. Wait, no, they blinked a couple of times- ah, there, they opened all- five?- of their eyes. Not only was it no longer pitch black, but it seemed that lights had been conjured above them, dozens of tiny purple and blue tea lights that cast the living room in a pleasant glow.

Had- had they caused that? Somehow?

Conjuring on accident- how did they manage that? And what else could they do? What couldn’t they do, though, in this new form? Something like them was bound to have limitations.

They stood up sharply, and immediately cracked their head against the ceiling. They yelped in pain, silently amending that standing up straight while indoors was the first limitation to note. They hunched over, managing to keep upright if they just bent their knees and tilted their neck. And that brought on a much more important investigation into themself: their new physical form.

They were obviously very tall, but also sort of- long in general? Their limbs, their fingers, their face, every feature was very narrow, almost spider-like. And, on the topic of spider-like limbs, they had two sets of arms; one in the usual place, but another placed behind that, curving around from just under their shoulder blades. In addition, their fingers, lithe and spindly, were six on each hand. Despite the unordinary length to many of their appendages, though, they were still noticeably muscular. Wide shoulders, a defined abdomen, and sturdy legs.

With a sharp wave of their hand, they conjured a full-body mirror to hang in front of them, promptly leaning over to examine themself.

Their face was made of edges; sharp cheekbones, pointed ears, and blocky glasses that covered all of their eyes but the middle one. They ran their fingers through their shaggy, curled up hair- a good deal of which fluffed forwards past their forehead and into their face. It was mixed colors, swirls of purple and blue blending together in soft, bouncy locks. 

They had interesting features aplenty, but one thing stood out dramatically. One thing that drew their attention at once. 

The mouth.

Their lips were dark- almost black, with hints of color toned under it. They dragged a finger along it, but it didn’t wipe away like makeup. They opened their mouth, revealing long needles of teeth, dozens and dozens of them top and bottom- all except for the upper canines. Those were thick, overly large, and tinted with purple. They ended in dangerous looking points, shoving out past the new side’s lips even when they closed their mouth, appearing much like an arachnid's venomous mandibles. 

They took a step back from the mirror, experimentally poking their big fangs. To their surprise, the teeth moved; just a wiggle, but enough to show that they were mobile, that they could be flexed and retracted. Well, that was...

That was sick as hell.

Now, to investigate their outfit: they were a little monstrous, sure, but also very smartly dressed. They wore a navy blue plaid waistcoat, laid overtop of a pastel purple sweater, which in turn was beneath a plain, black, short-sleeved button-up shirt. Their tie was a simple white with subdued flecks of violet and sapphire, dotted to look intentionally asymmetrical. 

Their lower half also bore a layered aesthetic: sheer lavender leggings beneath strategically ripped black jeans. They also wore a short, tight skirt over it, the color and pattern matching that of their waistcoat. A few chains dangled from the belt loops on their hips, clinking a little as they moved. They had sleek black shoes with small platforms, something vaguely Demonia-style. Altogether, the look was a strange blend of elegant and alternative. Strange, but very, very, very… becoming, to say the least. 

They couldn’t help staring at themself. Actually, ogling might be the more accurate word. They were hot, was that vain to say? If it was, they didn’t particularly care, because it was true. Of all the things they could have been together, confident wasn’t expected, but it was more than welcome. Because- damn.

Five minutes of gawking at their own reflection wound up being enough, in the end, and they forced themself to wave the mirror back out of existence. There were so many more things to consider about themself, after all, and that just couldn’t wait any longer. There were infinite things to know, God, they were a new creature entirely.

It was… it was overwhelming. They had so many questions. They had so many concerns, millions of them, and millions of thoughts that didn’t fit into either of the aforementioned categories, thoughts that existed just to fill up space in a head that suddenly felt overpacked. Too many minds in such a reduced space.

It’s okay, they thought, sucking in a deep, slow breath, One at a time, Dear.

There’s too much. I can’t see it all. I can’t explain all of it.

Which half of them was that? Was it… both? Both of them, comforting and receiving comfort? What an impossible creation they’d become! Wait, no, they had to focus on calming down before they gave that any thought. 

We can’t get to all of it, they agreed with themself, Some of it, though, certainly.

Like what?

They thought for a moment.

We could start with a name?

Oh. That’s probably important.

Yes, just a bit. 

They let their breath out in a laugh, pulling their sleeves past their hands and curling their fingers in the fabric. It took only a second of contemplation before, quite promptly, they knew what they were going to be called from now on. They knew their name, and everything else began to click into place from there.

Livril.

They sighed, contented, and sat back into the corner of the sectional. They didn’t exactly fit, curling up on the couch as they had before, but they were easily flexible enough to find a way. Now that they knew their name, they could really start learning who exactly Livril was.

There was so much they could learn from this, so many things they could enjoy this way. What music did they like? (Probably sad. Most certainly folk punk.) How did they speak? (sharply, they would guess.) How did they move? (Quick, startling, definitely fidgety.)

And that was hardly all, though it was a good start. There was so much more to get to, and they intended to answer all of it as soon as possible.

...But that ‘as soon as possible’ would probably be in the morning, because Livril fell asleep exactly two minutes after their head hit the couch cushion.

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